Ep 39 | The Black Achievement Trauma Tax, John Henryism, and The Bear

Charles Cole: Welcome to Color Commentary, a podcast where the stories shaping our world are told in black and white first, and then we dig into their deeper meaning in full color. Each week I'll be bringing you the news like this. First, we'll start with what I like to call the black and white section: a clear, straight-shooting rundown of the facts in the tradition of greats like Ed Bradley, Walter Cronkite, and the classic voices of journalism. Then we'll shift into the color commentary section where I add my own personal opinions and insight. Sometimes Sometimes it'll just be me, sometimes we'll have guests. Listen, I'm a scholar, a hip-hop junkie, a movie and culture nerd, and an avid book reader, okay? Like in these shows, you're gonna get glimpses of all that. Okay? Well, let's get into it. Welcome to Color Commentary. All right, people. So we have three different things on the table today, three segments. First, ⁓ I just got back from New Orleans, where the original Ape Black Hands crew got back together at the National Charter Schools Convention. I'm gonna walk you through what that reunion meant, you know, why we came back to the table in 2026, and you know, just kind of process those thoughts and and and and and and feelings ⁓ here with you all. I know a lot of you are Ape Black Hands fans. And second, ⁓ I want to introduce you all to a concept called John Henryism, ⁓ which is a piece of clinical research that, you know, has been quietly diagnosing ⁓ the cost of black grit for more than 40 years. If you read my book, Beyond Grit and Resilience, I think this will feel pretty familiar. So We'll take a look at that. I I just stumbled on to the term. I wasn't fully, fully aware of it, but I did used to read John Henry when I was younger and Definitely some interesting parallels. And then finally we'll close with my full review of the final season of the Bear. There may be a special surprise in that conversation because I told you I'm a TV nerd too. ⁓ but they just wrapped up. They wrapped up five seasons. I think it's one of the best shows of this this era. But I do have some thoughts. So we'll chat about all that. So let's start with ⁓ let's go to New Orleans. Come with me. Here it is in black and white. Okay? I'm gonna open up with this personal report where last week I was in New Orleans for NCSC 26, which is just shorthand for the National Charter Schools Conference 2026. ⁓ and I produced this mini education podcast festival at the conference. I had a vision and There were just some incredible people at that organization that helped it come together and it would not have on its own. ⁓ starting with ⁓ my homie Tim, who who who encouraged me to put in the proposal, and then Drea, Dr. Zayas, who was ⁓ just instrumental in making that happen, and then Miss Cindy, who on the who works on the ground. And it just would not have been possible without her. ⁓ she was just incredible. So there were about six to eight podcasts ⁓ that we curated to be there. this room looked different from the rest of the rooms. We put up, you know, the walls had this traditional conference room feel where it's white walls, brick, you know, kind of cold room. We put some some black ⁓ Like curtains up, we put some up lights. We had a the, you know, this the stage was raised, we had some plants on stage. It really looked beautiful. it really looked beautiful, and I wanted this little to I wanted this spot to be somewhat of an oasis inside of a larger conference. And the larger conference was great, it was fine. I just am somebody who's been going to conferences for a long time. And you don't always feel like you found your people in those conferences. And and and I used to yearn for like a space like that and I just thought that we could create we could create something that people really appreciated and they did. Multiple of the podcasts were standing room only. We added like twenty-five more chairs. ⁓ one podcast we turned away thirty people. Then another we had to turn away fifty. And when I talk about A Black Hands, we had to turn away probably the most there. And let me be frank with you. They were not happy that they got turned away, but there was fire codes and we told people to get there early. ⁓ a lot of people wanted to see the hands. So I'm talking about these guys. Let me let me introduce it because everybody here may not know what the A Black Hands were. So for new listeners, A Black Hands is podcast that I co-founded years ago with my fellow co-hosts, which happened to be Chris Stewart, Raymond Ankrum, ⁓ now Dr. Raymond Ankrum, congrats. ⁓ and Sharif Elmecki, ⁓ with four black men. ⁓ we have unfiltered conversation about black education in this country. And when we started, ⁓ the country was in a different place. It was long before COVID, but led in. To COVID, and we jailed in Fit because one, all four of us believed in the power of black education and advocating for black people to have the best education possible and the best access to education possible. What the show got interesting for people was that the four of us, while really good friends who love each other, are very different. We had four different political ideologies. One was Democrat, one was Republican, one was at the time libertarian, and one one was independent. I think that's changed. I'm still Democrat. ⁓ I was a Democrat. I think that the Libertarian is now independent. ⁓ I think the Republican is now independent as well. I don't know. We haven't had a chance to retalk about it. ⁓ we lived in different parts of the country, whereas I may have represented the Chicago, Oakland, Bay Area aspect. Sharif ⁓ is from Philly through and through. Ray ⁓ runs a school ⁓ in New York, but is also from the south. And and Chris ⁓ lives in the Minneap Minneapolis area. And so you know, it was an interesting dynamic and most of the education talks we saw were just They just were bland. They were talking points. They did not speak to real people. They did not, they didn't move us. I'm I don't I don't want to shit on any of those other shows because it's not a this is before us. We just saw something lacking in the space and we created it and we inspired a lot of people and we became the voice for a lot of people and we had over 200 episodes and you know and I would I can only speak for myself why I left. I I left first. It's a bunch of different reasons. But I think you know, we had did over 200 and something episodes. And at that point, you start going over topics again and again. and I I wasn't having the same reactions to it, to the topics, in the sense because we'd already talked about like three or four times. ⁓ But it was just time at that point, and I think that things had kind of shifted ⁓ just in what was happening in the ether. But I think now When you ask about why we may have come back, the world is in such a different place, right? We're in another Trump administration. There are people that are afraid to speak up or have kind of regressed in their ability to be outspoken, especially as it comes to what's best for black students and black kids. ⁓ and I think the four of us will never have that issue. We will always be willing to give our real thoughts and what we believe. And it was just time. And we were moderated by the lovely and amazing J Artist Wright. She was incredible, you know. We're we're not an easy bunch to manage. ⁓ but she handled it, she handled it like a pro. And so, you know, when we had this opportunity come up in New Orleans and it started to leak out that we were gonna do a reunion, there was a lot of feedback. There was a lot of people. That wanted to hear from the hands. So if you are new, you can go check out old episodes. Just do a search for A Black Hands. and who knows what the future holds. ⁓ who knows? All I know is that for that one night, for that one moment, we got to all be back together. Our chemistry was still pretty good. ⁓ and as soon as I get video for that, you know, we'll we'll post that up in some places. So What was the experience like? What was the energy in the room? I will say this, man. It was I wear I I tend to wear two hats. I tend to be what people will call talent, but also I tend to be one of the creators or producers of things. I it's just who I am in my makeup. ⁓ hell, you could probably ask Tommy on this podcast. ⁓ he's probably like, hey man, just be talent. I don't really need your input right here. ⁓ but you know, sometimes I have a vision and and I try to live that out and but it's a different experience because I know where the cameras are supposed to be. I know where this market's supposed to happen. I can just tell when things aren't happening a way that they need to. So the one thing about wearing both of those roles is you can never fully settle in. ⁓ I'm never fully settled when I was on stage. Like I'm still checking the time and, you know, trying to give time markers to Jay who was moderating who and sh as she should have, let me know she was on top of it that she had it. I'm communicating with, you know, ⁓ people in the back that that's running the the NCSC, it's like, ⁓ we gotta get the new people on and there was a mix up in time. You know, I'm managing that in real time. But I don't know if people really noticed it. ⁓ I've done it for a while, so I I enjoy it. But the the energy in that room, the lights were low. ⁓ people were just so happy to see us back together. And I think that podcast is different from some of the other podcasts because it encourages you to participate. It encourages you to cheer or groan or moan. And I think the the sweet spot of A Black Hands ⁓ is that usually people that are fans of the show, they have a person they really like and a person that they really don't like. And I love that. I love ⁓ it's just interesting. I've met the people that are my quote unquote fans that that favor me and I've met the ones that do not and it's and it's really interesting. And you know, I talked about why we built it in the first in the first place, but the y you you gotta I think sometimes we just wire different. I I I I think we were just a group that was wired pretty differently. I'm just I'm scared, I'm afraid of a lot of things in life. But speaking my mind just has never really been one. ⁓ maybe it's because I grew up in a neighborhood where people actually fought and like, you know, I don't like yeah I'm gonna give y'all sage wisdom that my father gave me. I may have shared this on an episode before. ⁓ Tommy, I don't know. You might clutch pearls. I'm not sure. But I was a social when I became a social worker, I was one of the youngest social workers in California. There was like this program that Schwarzenegger did to help, you know, attract and keep ⁓ like black men in in like social work. And and there was just a shortage at the job. It the the the stars just aligned. I didn't want to go do a traditional MSW, ⁓ But there was a special program where I could take these classes, have special ⁓ supervision at the job, and I would have what's called an MSW exception, meaning I could work in that capacity, but I was young. And I I was just nervous. I was I knew I was younger than other people. I wanted to do well. And one time I was talking to my dad and he could tell I was nervous. And you gotta l learn a lot about my father ⁓ in this story. So he's just like, hey, was you good? And I was yeah, and he was like, you know, you can you're getting a salary, right? Like, you I was like, no, that's a salary. Like, okay, cool. Like, you know, that that's that's success. That's a that's a career. And he was like, but you look nervous. And I just kind of told him what I just told you all. And he said, Well, is anybody gonna beat your ass? Like and look, that may not translate for you, but with how I grew up and the things that I saw, if there's no imminent physical danger, which is what I tended to focus on a lot for whatever reason. I didn't get into a lot of fights or anything, but it just put me at ease. It just, it just, this is professional world. This is this is corporate world. This is different. And so that's how I look at education. I'm I'm not afraid of old school board members. Like I'm just I'm not. I'm not afraid of a superintendent. ⁓ being upset that I had a critique on a system that pays them very well even though ⁓ kids can't read in said system. And I like I like good superintendents. I'm just saying ⁓ it's a public entity space. You're gonna have people that have different thoughts and opinions. So and I think the four of us as a whole just never had a problem speaking up. And and and I think people admired that. So I don't want to harp harp on it too long. it was very good Being back with the crew. It was very good watching Ray and Sharif have banter like they never left. ⁓ it was really good, you know, watching Chris's brain work in the moment of he's being asked this question, and there's an answer there, but that answer might not be good enough. How do I make this room think? How do I get this room off its square? Chris Stewart has an uncanny knack of doing that. And I think mine kind of a bit neurotic, almost nasally, but like, okay, hear these facts first and then I'll give you my raw thoughts. But I need you to be clear on the facts so we're not so you're not running with false information. I I I just all four of us have such a distinctive style, you know, ⁓ I would say Sharif is more of the sage, the wisdom guy. Like he's gonna give you some quotes. He is going to try to inspire you. ⁓ it just kind of shines through. And I think Ray, you know, being the one who's actively leading the school at the moment is really good at bringing it back into practitioner mode. Well, this is how you would do that. Here's what has to happen, and and all that stuff. So It was it was a blessing that we were able to do it. It was a blessing that people showed up. It was a blessing that people were upset that they couldn't get in and that people are asking for more. So I don't know what the future holds, but to Chris, Ray, Sharif, Jay, thank you so much for all being a part of that and and and allowing us to to be able to come back and do it. I just think that was that's just a sign of the work that we put in. I just think that's really cool. All right. Topic two. John Henryism. So for segment two. In the black and white segment of John Henryism, we're talking about a concept that you may have never heard of. You may have only heard of the book, right? So let me explain a little bit. John Henryism is named after John Henry. He's the folk hero who was a black steel driver in the 1800s. He was the steel driving man. And the legends say that he raced a steam-powered drill to see who could break through the rock faster. And if you read the book, I used to I don't I used to just read these stories when I was younger, but John Henry ends up winning the race. ⁓ and then he died right after. His heart exploded. In 1983, a bit serendipitous because that's the year I was born. But in 1983, ⁓ a black ⁓ epidemiologist at Duke University named Dr. Sherman James, he gave the legend a clinical name. He had been studying black men in North Carolina and he was trying to figure out why their rates of high blood pressure were just so much higher than everyone else's. And while he was doing that research, he met a real man named John Henry Martin. And Mr. Martin was born into a sharecropping family. ⁓ he had a second grade education. And by the time he was forty, he had bought seventy-five acres of land from white owners in the Jim Crow South. And by the time he was fifty, his body was breaking down. He had High blood pressure, he had ulcers, he had really severe arthritis. And Dr. James saw a pattern. And what he saw was is that black men who pushed hardest against unfair treatment, they tend to be the ones who told themselves that nothing in this world was gonna stop them, ⁓ and they tended to be the same people whose bodies would give out. And he gave that pattern a name. He called it John Henryism. And Here's the actual clinical definition. John Henryism is a strong behavioral pattern of coping with long-term stress through hard work and single-minded determination. People high ⁓ in John Henryism believe any obstacle can be overcome if they just grind hard enough. They do not back down, they do not slow down, they do not rest, right? And then the research is pretty clear about what comes next. People who score high on John Henryism, especially black Americans, Who also live in poverty or near it, they show significantly higher rates of high blood pressure, heart disease, and early death. Their stress hormones never come down. ⁓ their hearts work over time, their bodies pay the bill for their will, right? So they die. And I've watched a lot of black men die. and there's 40 years of research, ⁓ That confirmed and extended these original findings, and John Henryism has been linked to the worst hard outcomes, higher cumulative wear and tear on the body, and shorter life expectancy. So let's jump into it. If you do know me, you know that I have a book, and in that book I name what I call ⁓ the bat tax, and that's ⁓ the black achievement trauma tax. ⁓ and it's a mirror, right? Like there's a mirror to what Dr. James found. It's a mine was more in in academic and professional realm. His in a professional realm, but also ⁓ no there's a lot of similarities. There's a lot of similarities, right? I it's so interesting because I searched and scoured and maybe because of where I was looking, it just didn't come up because I was really focused in academia world. ⁓ but it's been backing this stuff up for a while, right? And and and it backs up the black achievement trauma tax pretty well. And what I talked about was somewhat of this grit industrial complex. And and Angela Duckworth, you know, is really, really popular. I I appreciate her research, even though I don't always agree with it, or I think there are some parts that might be missing. You know, there is this notion of like the harder you work, you know, the better you do and you ignore these things about yourself. And here's the thing with that, right? Like I do believe that. I believe that in a lot of ways. It got me out of poverty. It got me into college. It got me through college. It got me to become a doctor. But what I noticed in my research where it differs a little bit is the side effects of it. ⁓ the impacts that it has on your psyche, the impacts that it has on your ability to build and maintain relationships, the survivor's guilt, the imposter syndrome. There's a lot of things that come with it. ⁓ that can hurt you in the long run. So what I tried to build was this agency model that took the best parts of that grit piece or the John Henryism because hard work is important, but it's sustained hard work is important and you need the moments to recharge. You need the moments to take care of yourself. You you you have to ⁓ regenerate because if you don't, you you're just pulling from nothing. And nothing from nothing leaves nothing. You will be gone. You will be dead and the world will continue to turn around you. And it's just really important. And I think there's some other dynamics that are worth diving into. ⁓ that black American male ⁓ phenotype, ⁓ I do think that it lends itself ⁓ for a deeper conversation. I do think that there are still some burdens that we carry that do look different ⁓ from other groups and they have to be discussed. I think that black women have been doing a really good job of discussing ⁓ the ills that plague them or how they feel about certain things. I think other groups have done a really, really good job of talking about those things as well. I think that black men are starting to more. And I think we're in that first we're in a new chorus of it where those men that stepped out first talking about these things and talking about these differences, they have to, you know, first through the door get shot, right? Like so they have to kind of be the ones told, hey, shut up or that's misogynist or that's I I don't know how talking about yourself ⁓ and and ways to get better or acknowledging certain things is misogynistic, but I think ⁓ part of it is that people are not used to that group of people focusing on themselves. And when you look now in twenty twenty six and all the things that are happening and you look at hustle culture, which I don't hate on, like I I like to hustle. I ⁓ it's something that I'm proud of. ⁓ or 5 a.m. clubs or all these side hustles on top of day jobs. you know, some people can't do that. Some people are rejecting that notion. And I think that there are people that still do it like me, but you find happy mediums. Because I'm gonna be honest with you, I would not be myself if I wasn't doing those other things. I I grew up homeless, fam. I lived in four shelters. I'm never not gonna have another side hustle. I'm gonna have a job. I can be getting paid a million dollars a year. I'm still gonna also have something else that occupies my time and that spare time that keeps my brain sharp. And that is a pot of money coming in that is not tied to that one ⁓ job because I watched my father get laid off from jobs ⁓ at a whim all the time. That's just the world that we live in. I I can't, you know, it it is what it is. So there has to be a happy medium because what I don't want to happen is I don't wanna Fall dead at 45 because my heart exploded like John Henry. See what I'm saying? Like these are conversations that we have to have. And I think that we tend to be okay ⁓ with people working themselves to death. And again, I'm not saying that this doesn't impact white people, Latino people, Asian people. I'm sure it impacts everybody in a different way. Just what you'll learn about me is my writing style, my research style is I research what I know. I research what I'm closest to. And the reason why I talk about it like that and I do that is because I've tried to kind of write for the the universal you, right? The universal person. And I just think that your stuff has no soul when you do it. I I I I need a muse, I need a group, I need a person that I can focus in on and I can be as pure as possible. Everybody will still be able to use those fines and still be able to use that stuff, but it's going to be tethered to something that's very real in my life. And and I think this John Henryism piece, when I came across it, it was just fascinating to me because I used to read that story all the time. I used to read that story and The Emperor Has No Clothes or New Clothes or whatever it's called. I think that stories like that are some of the most profound bits of writing in human history. I feel let me be I want to be very clear on this, right? Like when I graduated with my doctorate, the first question, I don't know why if this was a thing, I didn't know it was a thing, Tommy. What are you reading? And I can tell you these very fancy books. I can talk about Fred A, I can talk about Cornell West, I can talk about a Dr. Jib ⁓ Jarvis Gibbons, who's just really stellar and this up and coming ⁓ young cat that that that isn't just a brilliant researcher. But the things that are most profound to me are them damn fables. The Emperor has no clothes. You can t if if if people are struggling with imposter syndrome and not being sure and not feeling like they belong, go reread The Emperor's n has no clothes. Cause what you will find out is that everybody front. Everybody's trying to get by. Everybody's trying to get through. Especially in the realm of education, whereas if you do know how to end all this poverty stuff, if you do know how to end all this illiterary stuff, illiteracy stuff. Then you better get to sharing because if you know how to fix it and you have and you just haven't, that's diabolical. It's easier just to say, I'm I don't know, and I'm doing the best that I can. And I don't know. I'm doing the best that I can. So, you know, I think that terms like this, which I do admire, same with agency, John Henryism, bat, whatever it is, I think that in this hyper-political moment, I do think things are getting bastardized. And I do think that when we talk about personal responsibility, it's being weaponized by a right wing that does not mean us any, that doesn't mean a lot of people ⁓ good. I think that there is both. There's a yin and a yang. There are systemic issues that plague and impact people. I have directly been impacted by those systems. I hope to God that those systems change. I work to change those systems. I've done some pre historic things to change those systems. ⁓ whether it's leading historic voter registration drives in college or running an organization that teaches agency to other people to other people. And at the same time, I also believe that you have to be personally responsible for your own success. You have to be responsible for your own well-being. You have to, if you want to go get a new skill, it's not on anybody else to go help you get that new skill. It's on you. It's on you to advocate for it. It's on you to teach yourself. It's on you to go out and utilize your resources. And all of you are probably watching this on a device that was fifteen hundred dollars plus. And you have the secrets to the universe on that device. So if you just have that and choose not to better yourself, then some of that you gotta you gotta absorb. But no, I don't I don't like and I'm very careful that my work does not get hijacked ⁓ for political ideations that I do not agree with. ⁓ and I fight for that. So I don't know, man. I d i I you know, I think there's a question to end this on for the segment is like, you know, so what do we teach in Our kids, you know, what are you teaching young people ⁓ about hard work? How do you what is their relationship to hard work? You know, where is the line between giving them the tools to survive and handing down the same pattern that might be shortening black lives? And also For causes, sometimes people are sacrificed. We've lost incredible people so that we can have the rights to do the things that we are able to do so freely now. And there's still a full journey and battle ahead. And that's life. But I'm so blessed to be born in this part of society and civilization. I'm blessed to have this life. And I have to believe that agency or John Henryism or Bat or Just my own will and desire for self-determination. I have to believe in matters because if it doesn't, then nothing matters. And I'm not nihilistic like that. That was the end of segment too. ⁓ So now we're in we're in our final segment for the day, and I am a huge fan of this show called The Bear. I was born in the Chicago area. My grandfather had a short-order restaurant similar to ⁓ The Beef, which is the the restaurant at the beginning of The Bear. and this show just captured me, especially on FX after shows that I FX makes shows that I love. I loved Atlanta, I love Little Dicky. And this just this level of prestige television, ⁓ it just captures you, especially in those first two seasons. And they were just so masterful, and then they got really big and they They took some swings and you could tell that they listened to the criticism of how is this keep winning comedy awards and it's not a comedy? And then they started doing cameos and John Cena's making an appearance here. Now some of the cameos did work. I think it was Fisher's. I think that was that episode where you had Mulaney and I mean, just actors came out to act. These people were putting on a masterclass of acting. Shout out to Jamie Lee Curtis. Who the level of neurosis ⁓ that this woman was able to make you feel, I feel like Tommy's feeling it right now. ⁓ the way she just can make you feel uncomfortable, the bear has a way of of injecting this level of anxiety into you, almost like a roller coaster. I think the pit is doing a little bit of that in certain ways now, and I think that those shows kind of talk to each other. But anyway, this was the final season. Tommy, I have not had a chance to talk about this with another human. What was your take what's your take on the bear overall? And what were your thoughts on this final season? I love the bear. I think it captures Chicago better than anything I've seen before. How you feel about that? I think it captures a part of Chicago. I think it captures I would say Chicago is the most segregated city in the country for a reason. I think it captures. middle class working white Chicago in that kind of way. I think there are shows like The Shy or or South Side that that show like a black side of it, one dramatic and one comedic. But also Chicago is home there are so many immigrant groups that are mostly concentrated here. So for instance, Joker who plays for Denver, the Denver Nuggets, his his race of people, this is the most They're all here. Like it's you know, it's the most concentrated place. So I think Chicago means a lot to a lot of different people. But I do think it's a very good representation of Chicago, but I could see a black kid growing up in the South Side kind of like I I that's not fully familiar to me, but I got it. I can see it. I guess it it shows the the area that it purports to show. Yeah. As well. Yeah. I just remember watching the show Shameless and someone goes He's the meanest guy north of the Chicago River. And it's like, what are you doing? Yeah. Yeah. Anyway. Yeah, I mean Jeremy Allen White is very much a I think he's a Brooklyn kid, right? I think he's definitely a New Yorker. I mean, I could tell he's a New Yorker in the show too though, by the way. ⁓ he convinced me he's pretty good. I mean he's been playing a Chicago he was on that show Shameless, so he's been playing. Yeah, he's on Shameless, yeah. For fifteen, sixteen years. Yeah, you know what I think they did that was smart in the bear is he has He's from Chicago, but he spent significant time in New York. So I think they the writers just did a good job of covering themselves when, you know, certain things poke through. Because if I'm in the Kentucky area, like I don't my accent comes back, but it comes back when I'm excited, I'm upset or something. But if I'm in Kentucky for like a week, I'm I'm just it's back in there, but you'll hear slippage of Chicago, you'll hear slippage of of California. My accent is just terrible. So It's ⁓ and and and I because I didn't grow up here in the same way, I I absolutely can't be the the gatekeeper of what is Chicago and what is not. So Well no one's doing the Chicago thing except for ⁓ cousin. Yeah. Everyone else has sort of a neutral accent. The the b the Barzotto family doesn't really have like Jamie Lee Curtis doesn't have the accent. It's just cousin who talks about the beef and you know, going to Gary and Ianna. Right, right, right. And and he I mean I mean, can we talk about his development? I mean, I think he is by far the most realized character in the show. I mean, he had the most profound change. I think ⁓ It is no reason. It's no it's no wonder that he's kind of blossoming into this star and got Fantastic Four and is getting all these other opportunities. I mean, I will say this. The people on this show can act. I don't love the brothers too much. They get on my nerves, but I get why the fact whatever their name Yeah, I get why they're there. I I could do it out, but I get it. And they had they got their winning moment with their par their outdoor party and patio this year, where I'm happy I'm happy for, but Outside of that, I don't I don't always need them. But I liked I think ever I think it could have been a good three season show. Like the three and four were one long season then not much development happened and Yeah. I like I was happy to watch the season, this was fine, but it wasn't the best one. It don't know, blow me away. But it wasn't. I think they was they were smelling themselves in those seasons. I mean, they were just too and and and look, and the pit's about to go through this, right? Like You know, you come out the gate, you're you're so good, you're so, and now there are demands on you. Now there's like, well, is this guy, this guy, are we should we be praising this guy? He should be an he's an asshole. And I think that's the thing, right? Is you want your shows to do well, but selfishly, you don't always want them to do too well because you don't want to lose, you know, that that thing. I'm I'm a big 50 Cent fan, right? When I was in when 50 Cent was coming out, I was the kid in my friend group that was buying, I was ordering the mixtapes from New York. Like a lot of people had not known him. And then he came out and then everybody now likes him and know but you're like, but you don't but you don't know him. Like you know what I'm saying? And it's and I think that's what happened with the bear. I think when the bandwagon people came and they kind of placated to those guys, it was I think we all were like, it's time to wrap this shit up. You know? So it was but how did you feel about the last season? Yeah, it was fine. I enjoyed it. I liked the whole rainy thing. Like the f six of the eight episodes were like in a a single night in a rainstorm kinda. I thought that was kind of an interesting way to do it. I liked it. No, I I I mean, I liked it too. I you know, and ⁓ it's important for the audience to know we both are in the greater Chicago area talking about this, right? Like so those storms are real. ⁓ they're very, very real. I need to buy a generator because I've had You will lose power. You will d these things happen, especially ⁓ if if you're not if you're just outside the city, it happens a lot. But what what what stood out for you though? I mean let me I I don't I don't wanna interrupt you. I just wanna you know I I wanna okay. All right. But yes, but did you have any favorite moments that you wanted to highlight? Not really. It was it was a good kind of victory lap, but I feel like all the arcs were completed a while ago. Yeah. I I have though. I have a what do you I'm gonna embarrass myself You're about to see how much I love you, Tommy, because I am about to admit things to you like the world is not watching. I never thought, had you told me now, let me have one more start of a sentence that's not complete. I can't believe I'm about to say this. But if you told me in the beginning of this season, when this show started, that I would get emotional seeing somebody cut a candle in half, I would have laughed at you. I forgot about that. That was fucking amazing. Like, why am I emotional? What and and and and again, this is where I'm pissed off at the middle seasons. I'm pissed off at seasons three and four. I'm I'm ready for this show to be done, but I want to see it go out well. And I'm like, we didn't need that. But if I not has if I did not spend that time is Marcus, right? Is that his name? Marcus. If I didn't spend that time with Marcus, if I didn't spend that time with Marcus and his mom, if I wasn't there for Marcus being so focused when they're pushing him to go faster and go faster and he can't, but he puts his phone off to the side so he can really focus and he misses the announcement of his mom dying. If I don't see him go on that trip with Lucas, if I to meet Lucas, if I don't see him mention his father in any kind of fashion, that was the best payoff for me. I I mean, this this dad had like three lines. He didn't even have a full page. But watching and then watching everybody coalesce around him to make this, they just knew how special it was. And then this motherfucker. Says, ⁓ I forget the I forgot the caramel sauce, takes a candle, cuts it. Why am I getting misty watching somebody serve dessert? Cause I I I don't like this, Tommy. This is not that was good TV. It was great writing. Yeah. It was so beautiful. So beautiful. I I liked him. I mean, I sort of relate to the Carmi character in ways, like being kind of jaded and I have you ever experienced someone in your work where you're sort of like on autopilot and a little bit over it, and then there's someone younger than you or just newer and they're still so into it. Yes. That's what he represented to me. It's just like Carmi doesn't care at all anymore about certain aspects and doesn't find joy in it. But Marcus is like, he said he's watching old westerns to get inspired and samurai movies. Like he wants it so bad. But then you see him make this brios. Out of nothing. So he does care. I just think he is, I just think he he's I think he's bipolar, man. I I just think he is not, he has no regulation. Like, listen, I I I personally my phenotype is probably closest to him without the talent. Like I think I'm talented, but I think he is supposed to be savant level, right? He's savant, he's this cooking savant. It does make me think of my father who could really, really cook, and my grandfather who could really cook, but my dad. I understand it now. My father never taught me how to cook. And I think it's because I don't think he felt like he had a lot in this world that was his, that was like his thing. And cooking for my mother and my sister and my brother. Like, I'm sure if I would have asked him, he would have. But I he doesn't like for my mother to cook because he wants to cook. He doesn't want anybody mad in his grill because that's his. That's what he does. And I think with Carmi, I think Carmi's thing is for so long, this is what I've done, and I haven't allowed myself to think that I can do anything else. I don't know if he can just I don't know how you can just the next day be in architecture. I I don't, you know, and I I don't know if I'm willing to start over as an intern when I just built a two-star restaurant. I I I I don't Practically, it doesn't work for me because I'm too practical. But I'm also the guy that sees his colleagues like quit a job leading the organization and and I'll be like, well, where are you going next? I have no idea. I'm gonna take six months. That logic, it it I can't do it. I can't think like that. I I I gr I was homeless. I've never left a job without having another job. Since I was 16 years old, I'm 42. Let's just wrap up the bear. Love the first season, love the second season, third, fourth season's okay, fourth, solid fifth. I forget where we're at. Fifth. Fifth. fifth, solid send off. ⁓ but but but I loved it. The episode seven made it all worth it. I I was not liking the tension. I I did not like that everything goes wrong. I did not like the I I just I just don't wanna live in that world. I don't wanna live in a in a what's the movie that Adam Sandler did with Safety with the Safety brothers? I I just don't wanna I don't wanna live in an uncut gems level of tension. For I I just it's just not everyone good for me. Either people love the bear or they say, ⁓ it's too much screaming and tension. And I I think I've just worked in some chaotic work environments where it was very familiar to me. It didn't throw me at all. I never liked this show where there are just mean, terrible people, rich, terrible people. very popular show. Succession. Couldn't get into it. Couldn't either because they were just jerks or whatever. But this didn't bother me at all. Yelling, screaming, I'm comfortable with that. And it's not that that bothered me. I just don't want to live in that world, but I'll live in that world if I get episode seven. You get what I'm saying? Like seven Great payoff. So I can it made it worth it. And I mean man, but at any rate, I I love thank you for talking with me on this. ⁓ and I'll just send us off, man. I know we I know we gotta go. ⁓ and just to to close us out, man. but that's the show. And please continue the the conversation. If you want to talk to us, you can send us a note at color commentarypod at gmail dot com. That's color commentary p O D at Gmail dot com. We read every single one. ⁓ So until next week, this has been color commentary. Be easy and we'll see you all next time. Peace.