Chasing Thoughts | S03 E02: How Would Your Life Change if You Regarded it as Art?

1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:07,000
What is my next challenge in daring to be human?
2
00:00:07,000 --> 00:00:09,000
How do I connect with life?
3
00:00:09,000 --> 00:00:15,000
How can I let go of my need for fixed answers in favor of aliveness?
4
00:00:15,000 --> 00:00:19,000
How do I live free from the experiences that shaped me?
5
00:00:19,000 --> 00:00:23,000
How can we be the change the world needs right now?
6
00:00:23,000 --> 00:00:27,000
Join us weekly for Stony Conversations about life.
7
00:00:27,000 --> 00:00:32,000
It is our mission to allow life itself to reveal to us the answers.
8
00:00:35,000 --> 00:00:38,000
Welcome to Chasing Thoughts.
9
00:00:44,000 --> 00:00:48,000
Hi everybody, welcome to Chasing Thoughts.
10
00:00:48,000 --> 00:00:51,000
It is almost the end of June.
11
00:00:51,000 --> 00:00:54,000
It's summer. I'm always so surprised how fast summer goes.
12
00:00:54,000 --> 00:00:58,000
When I found out it was the end of June today, like in my head,
13
00:00:58,000 --> 00:01:01,000
when I realized it, I'm like, oh shit.
14
00:01:01,000 --> 00:01:04,000
We're just flying, flying right along.
15
00:01:04,000 --> 00:01:07,000
Yeah, for some reason winter just feels longer for something.
16
00:01:07,000 --> 00:01:09,000
Yeah, like it's just weird.
17
00:01:09,000 --> 00:01:11,000
Yeah, it totally does.
18
00:01:11,000 --> 00:01:13,000
So yeah, summer is going very quickly.
19
00:01:13,000 --> 00:01:15,000
Yeah.
20
00:01:15,000 --> 00:01:16,000
Are you enjoying it?
21
00:01:16,000 --> 00:01:17,000
On my way.
22
00:01:17,000 --> 00:01:20,000
Are you enjoying it?
23
00:01:20,000 --> 00:01:25,000
Yes and no. So I prefer winter.
24
00:01:25,000 --> 00:01:27,000
I really love winter.
25
00:01:27,000 --> 00:01:31,000
And so I'm one of those people that's like counting down the days to fall.
26
00:01:31,000 --> 00:01:33,000
Oh wow. Okay.
27
00:01:33,000 --> 00:01:38,000
I like summer and I love my gardening and I love being able to go for hikes.
28
00:01:38,000 --> 00:01:43,000
But what I'm realizing more and more as I get older is.
29
00:01:43,000 --> 00:01:51,000
I need a lot of downtime and slow time and empty time.
30
00:01:51,000 --> 00:01:54,000
And it never fails that summer seems busier, right?
31
00:01:54,000 --> 00:01:57,000
There's more like barbecues and parties and weddings and people.
32
00:01:57,000 --> 00:02:00,000
And it's kind of exhausting for me.
33
00:02:00,000 --> 00:02:04,000
And when fall comes and I know that my weekends are just going to be like
34
00:02:04,000 --> 00:02:07,000
sitting on the couch reading my book while my husband watches football.
35
00:02:07,000 --> 00:02:11,000
I'm like, oh, like I just feel the rest in that. Right.
36
00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:15,000
I'm a very home body, you know, quiet person.
37
00:02:15,000 --> 00:02:18,000
And so while I love summer,
38
00:02:18,000 --> 00:02:22,000
it's often a little intense for my personality.
39
00:02:22,000 --> 00:02:24,000
Yeah.
40
00:02:24,000 --> 00:02:26,000
That's pretty interesting. Yeah.
41
00:02:26,000 --> 00:02:30,000
Sandy's the same way. Like she, she would rather,
42
00:02:30,000 --> 00:02:33,000
it would rather be like winter for her. She just loves winter.
43
00:02:33,000 --> 00:02:34,000
Yeah.
44
00:02:34,000 --> 00:02:38,000
I love being cozy and, you know, sitting and reading with a cup of tea in my
45
00:02:38,000 --> 00:02:41,000
mouth.
46
00:02:41,000 --> 00:02:44,000
And I guess a dream afternoon for me.
47
00:02:44,000 --> 00:02:49,000
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
48
00:02:49,000 --> 00:02:53,000
And I know it's not that way for other people and it's funny because,
49
00:02:53,000 --> 00:02:56,000
you know, the group of friends I'm a part of here locally,
50
00:02:56,000 --> 00:03:00,000
they're going to concerts and shows and like something every night and
51
00:03:00,000 --> 00:03:01,000
doing it.
52
00:03:01,000 --> 00:03:03,000
And it sounds like fun.
53
00:03:03,000 --> 00:03:04,000
Theoretically.
54
00:03:04,000 --> 00:03:05,000
Right.
55
00:03:05,000 --> 00:03:09,000
And I'm like, oh, it sounds like fun in the way that like being a
56
00:03:09,000 --> 00:03:13,000
fighter pilot sounds like fun. Like it is not reality for me.
57
00:03:13,000 --> 00:03:14,000
Right.
58
00:03:14,000 --> 00:03:18,000
You know, I wish I was that kind of person sometimes, but I'm not.
59
00:03:18,000 --> 00:03:21,000
So.
60
00:03:21,000 --> 00:03:26,000
Nice. Yeah. Like, I like getting out. I think I like the summer better.
61
00:03:26,000 --> 00:03:30,000
Just because getting out into nature has become so important for me.
62
00:03:30,000 --> 00:03:34,000
Cause I'm a home body too. And it's very easy for me to get locked in.
63
00:03:34,000 --> 00:03:37,000
And I'm like, I'm not going to be able to get locked in.
64
00:03:37,000 --> 00:03:39,000
I'm not going to be able to get locked in.
65
00:03:39,000 --> 00:03:41,000
What do you need to be so cool? Sorry.
66
00:03:41,000 --> 00:03:43,000
To have.
67
00:03:43,000 --> 00:03:47,000
Like a little courtyard or like a cool little indoor outdoor space in
68
00:03:47,000 --> 00:03:49,000
your house. Yeah.
69
00:03:49,000 --> 00:03:50,000
Yeah.
70
00:03:50,000 --> 00:03:54,000
Yeah. Like where is it? Like, um, in, in, I think like South America,
71
00:03:54,000 --> 00:03:57,000
they have those houses that are like built and there's like a square
72
00:03:57,000 --> 00:03:59,000
in the middle.
73
00:03:59,000 --> 00:04:02,000
Even down in Louisiana, they have, they have something like that.
74
00:04:02,000 --> 00:04:04,000
So, um,
75
00:04:04,000 --> 00:04:06,000
I think that's a really good idea.
76
00:04:06,000 --> 00:04:09,000
Yeah. So how was your week? Did you, did you learn,
77
00:04:09,000 --> 00:04:12,000
did you stretch? What was it like for you this week?
78
00:04:12,000 --> 00:04:17,000
Yeah. I'm really getting into, um, this idea of,
79
00:04:17,000 --> 00:04:20,000
I really like connect with the idea of creation.
80
00:04:20,000 --> 00:04:23,000
So how we talked about last time, like looking at our life through the
81
00:04:23,000 --> 00:04:24,000
lens of like art.
82
00:04:24,000 --> 00:04:28,000
You know, um, for some reason that word.
83
00:04:28,000 --> 00:04:32,000
I think that's more important for me than just the word art.
84
00:04:32,000 --> 00:04:35,000
And that got me thinking to just how important.
85
00:04:35,000 --> 00:04:37,000
Our words are.
86
00:04:37,000 --> 00:04:39,000
Oh yeah.
87
00:04:39,000 --> 00:04:42,000
And really like the intention behind the word. So,
88
00:04:42,000 --> 00:04:45,000
because I think there's more intention for me behind the word
89
00:04:45,000 --> 00:04:50,000
creation than there is, uh, for, than behind the word art.
90
00:04:50,000 --> 00:04:52,000
Yeah. For me,
91
00:04:52,000 --> 00:04:56,000
for me, I think the word art is more powerful and particularly
92
00:04:56,000 --> 00:04:58,000
for me.
93
00:04:58,000 --> 00:04:59,000
I think that's a good idea.
94
00:04:59,000 --> 00:05:01,000
I think that's a good idea.
95
00:05:01,000 --> 00:05:04,000
Because it's something I've always told myself I wasn't good at
96
00:05:04,000 --> 00:05:06,000
or didn't have time for, or, or, right.
97
00:05:06,000 --> 00:05:07,000
Like.
98
00:05:07,000 --> 00:05:11,000
Using that word to me.
99
00:05:11,000 --> 00:05:15,000
Means that I'm really going to have to break some barriers inside
100
00:05:15,000 --> 00:05:18,000
myself. Right. And so like, I feel the,
101
00:05:18,000 --> 00:05:22,000
the power in that word art for me.
102
00:05:22,000 --> 00:05:23,000
Yeah.
103
00:05:23,000 --> 00:05:26,000
And I think that's a good idea.
104
00:05:26,000 --> 00:05:27,000
I think that's a good idea.
105
00:05:27,000 --> 00:05:29,000
I think that's a good idea.
106
00:05:29,000 --> 00:05:31,000
I think that's a good idea.
107
00:05:31,000 --> 00:05:32,000
It's a good idea.
108
00:05:32,000 --> 00:05:33,000
I think that's a good idea.
109
00:05:33,000 --> 00:05:34,000
Yeah.
110
00:05:34,000 --> 00:05:36,000
And it's so cool too, because it shows.
111
00:05:36,000 --> 00:05:39,000
Exactly. I mean, how aligned we are, but also.
112
00:05:39,000 --> 00:05:42,000
The differences in us. You know, so like, when you were saying the
113
00:05:42,000 --> 00:05:45,000
word art, it sort of motivate you to break through those barriers.
114
00:05:45,000 --> 00:05:48,000
When I go to creation, when you were saying that, I was like.
115
00:05:48,000 --> 00:05:51,000
For me, creation moves me beyond those barriers.
116
00:05:51,000 --> 00:05:54,000
And I was like, boom, I just teleport to the other side.
117
00:05:54,000 --> 00:05:57,000
You know, I'm like, I'm going to go now.
118
00:05:57,000 --> 00:05:58,000
You know, so.
119
00:05:58,000 --> 00:06:00,000
That's just so cool, man.
120
00:06:00,000 --> 00:06:03,000
Yeah. I actually changed my profile on Instagram.
121
00:06:03,000 --> 00:06:07,000
And now it says digital artists, content creator,
122
00:06:07,000 --> 00:06:09,000
coach, media, right. Like I.
123
00:06:09,000 --> 00:06:11,000
I love that.
124
00:06:11,000 --> 00:06:15,000
New titles into my.
125
00:06:15,000 --> 00:06:19,000
What do they call that? It's called, I think the word is your reiki.
126
00:06:19,000 --> 00:06:22,000
I don't know if I'm saying it right, but that's the sort of.
127
00:06:22,000 --> 00:06:25,000
Paragraph that comes after your name, like.
128
00:06:25,000 --> 00:06:29,000
Daenerys mother of dragons, queen of the seven seas, right?
129
00:06:29,000 --> 00:06:33,000
What's your little, you know, titles that come after your name.
130
00:06:33,000 --> 00:06:36,000
Yeah. Yeah. Oh, dude, we should like make those up.
131
00:06:36,000 --> 00:06:38,000
I know it's fun.
132
00:06:38,000 --> 00:06:40,000
Using those again. Yeah.
133
00:06:40,000 --> 00:06:42,000
Keith eater of Cheetos.
134
00:06:42,000 --> 00:06:45,000
Right.
135
00:06:45,000 --> 00:06:50,000
Yeah. There's a woman I'll put her link in the show notes who works
136
00:06:50,000 --> 00:06:54,000
with people on building their unique your rikis or what I'm not
137
00:06:54,000 --> 00:06:57,000
sure if I'm saying the word, right, but she's a coach and she wrote
138
00:06:57,000 --> 00:07:00,000
a book called the professional troublemaker, which I love.
139
00:07:00,000 --> 00:07:03,000
Nice. I'll put her information down below.
140
00:07:03,000 --> 00:07:05,000
That's very cool. It sounds like a good book.
141
00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:08,000
Yeah. Yeah, it is.
142
00:07:08,000 --> 00:07:14,000
I also experienced some hardship this week that I wanted to bring up
143
00:07:14,000 --> 00:07:21,000
and talk about because it was a big deal for me.
144
00:07:21,000 --> 00:07:27,000
I had to let a client go because they were experiencing things that
145
00:07:27,000 --> 00:07:32,000
was beyond what I'm professionally trained for.
146
00:07:32,000 --> 00:07:37,000
And it brought up so much stuff for me because it was a beautiful
147
00:07:37,000 --> 00:07:42,000
woman who was in an emotionally abusive relationship or from what
148
00:07:42,000 --> 00:07:47,000
I heard, that was my result.
149
00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:50,000
Right.
150
00:07:50,000 --> 00:07:54,000
And something that I didn't, I wasn't able to heal or fix, but going
151
00:07:54,000 --> 00:07:57,000
through the process for me was really interesting because, you
152
00:07:57,000 --> 00:08:01,000
know, I myself have been in those situations, right?
153
00:08:01,000 --> 00:08:04,000
I was raised by somebody who did a lot of like gaslight and
154
00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:06,000
emotionally abuse.
155
00:08:06,000 --> 00:08:09,000
And then my husband was that. And then I got out of it.
156
00:08:09,000 --> 00:08:13,000
And then to get to know this person and then be, and then have to
157
00:08:13,000 --> 00:08:16,000
leave them and abandon them.
158
00:08:16,000 --> 00:08:20,000
And it just brought up so much stuff for me.
159
00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:25,000
And, you know, it really made me think about how healing or how
160
00:08:25,000 --> 00:08:27,000
everything is like just a circle, right?
161
00:08:27,000 --> 00:08:31,000
We're just going around and, you know, so many things that I hadn't
162
00:08:31,000 --> 00:08:34,000
felt or experienced in so long were like,
163
00:08:34,000 --> 00:08:39,000
I'm like, what do you do?
164
00:08:39,000 --> 00:08:43,000
And it just brought up and activated for me to look at and heal
165
00:08:43,000 --> 00:08:46,000
deeper.
166
00:08:46,000 --> 00:08:50,000
And just, man, it really is a never ending process of integration
167
00:08:50,000 --> 00:08:55,000
and growth and how beautiful that experience can be.
168
00:08:55,000 --> 00:08:57,000
Yeah. I mean, we are never.
169
00:08:57,000 --> 00:08:59,000
Static.
170
00:08:59,000 --> 00:09:01,000
You know, we are constantly moving.
171
00:09:01,000 --> 00:09:04,000
We are constantly moving.
172
00:09:04,000 --> 00:09:06,000
And we are constantly moving.
173
00:09:06,000 --> 00:09:08,000
But it's just so, so, so much that, you know,
174
00:09:08,000 --> 00:09:11,000
our bodies want homeostasis.
175
00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:15,000
It wants that balance, but the balance is, is fake because we can't
176
00:09:15,000 --> 00:09:16,000
stop moving.
177
00:09:16,000 --> 00:09:19,000
And it just shows how we keep going.
178
00:09:19,000 --> 00:09:20,000
I love.
179
00:09:20,000 --> 00:09:24,000
There's a lot of indigenous groups that see time as a circle
180
00:09:24,000 --> 00:09:27,000
instead of like we kind of see it as this linear thing.
181
00:09:27,000 --> 00:09:29,000
And they see time as a circle.
182
00:09:29,000 --> 00:09:31,000
And they can't stop moving.
183
00:09:31,000 --> 00:09:32,000
They can't stop moving.
184
00:09:32,000 --> 00:09:33,000
And they can't stop moving.
185
00:09:33,000 --> 00:09:36,000
The same thing with the past, you know.
186
00:09:36,000 --> 00:09:38,000
And that's the same thing with our,
187
00:09:38,000 --> 00:09:40,000
with our emotional and spiritual journeys.
188
00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:41,000
Yeah.
189
00:09:41,000 --> 00:09:57,000
Yeah.
190
00:09:57,000 --> 00:10:05,160
right? You're like, it's the moment of expansion and anything is the same moment as full contraction.
191
00:10:05,160 --> 00:10:11,480
Right? Like it's because it's going big and small and big and small and the waves, right? So you're
192
00:10:11,480 --> 00:10:17,560
expanding and shrinking and expanding and shrinking. And I think some people do it on really big
193
00:10:17,560 --> 00:10:24,200
levels and some people do it on tiny levels. But just thinking about how at that moment of expansion
194
00:10:24,200 --> 00:10:29,720
when you're at your largest bliss capacity, whatever, you're just about to go all downhill.
195
00:10:32,360 --> 00:10:39,960
And it's kind of that strange like flow of life, whether it's learning and growing, like I'm talking
196
00:10:39,960 --> 00:10:47,000
about and embracing old fears and things that came, or if it's expanding into the future as a
197
00:10:47,000 --> 00:10:54,120
creator and an artist, just really thinking about like, what is the nature of this flow and this
198
00:10:54,120 --> 00:10:58,840
wave and this expansion and contraction? And how do I get in alignment with it
199
00:11:01,000 --> 00:11:07,960
so that I can feel and do all the things, experience as much of it as I can?
200
00:11:12,120 --> 00:11:19,640
I, it's one of the things I'm really starting to see is that we, we've almost convinced ourselves
201
00:11:19,640 --> 00:11:27,080
that we're not something that we are, you know, like sort of like, so the whole thing with like,
202
00:11:27,080 --> 00:11:34,520
men can't feel emotions, but that's impossible. You know, you're gonna feel it. You're gonna
203
00:11:34,520 --> 00:11:41,880
react to them. You can mask it and hold it down, but that is a reaction to an emotion. So, so that
204
00:11:41,880 --> 00:11:49,800
whole concept is not real. You know, and then even, even like how we talk about like, I want to get into
205
00:11:49,800 --> 00:11:56,760
a line with this, you know, we always are. Yeah, just really more of so of us either fighting
206
00:11:56,760 --> 00:12:04,040
against the current or going with it, you know, like as we're going down that, that slope into the
207
00:12:04,040 --> 00:12:09,960
valley of like our vibrational energy, I think a lot of times we try to swim against the current
208
00:12:09,960 --> 00:12:18,760
because we tell ourselves this is bad. Yeah. You know, like even, even when you were describing
209
00:12:20,760 --> 00:12:28,200
stepping away from this client, like you use the word, I abandoned her. Yeah, that's what it felt like.
210
00:12:28,200 --> 00:12:36,120
Yeah, but it really wasn't because you saw what you were capable of and you saw what she needed.
211
00:12:36,120 --> 00:12:42,120
So you actually helped her, you were a step in her healing journey, what will hopefully be her healing journey.
212
00:12:42,120 --> 00:12:48,920
Yeah. You know, and I think, and I love the idea of the expansion and contraction being the same thing.
213
00:12:48,920 --> 00:12:55,560
And I think again, that's one of those things that we have to go through. There's, there's this object
214
00:12:55,560 --> 00:13:00,120
that I've, we've talked, in fact, I talked about them when we did the mushrooms, because this just blows my mind,
215
00:13:00,120 --> 00:13:07,560
but a white hole. And, and there's a theory that our universe, the Big Bang came from a white hole.
216
00:13:07,560 --> 00:13:14,280
It's a point of singularity where nothing can enter, but everything comes out. And it's, it's the contradiction to a black hole,
217
00:13:14,840 --> 00:13:22,200
which nothing can escape and everything goes in. So we, in order for there to be life, we have to
218
00:13:22,200 --> 00:13:26,280
contract to that singularity and then move through and then we can expand again.
219
00:13:26,280 --> 00:13:34,280
Yeah. And that's my exact experience of life, right? It's sort of like birthing and it's, you squeeze and it's uncomfortable.
220
00:13:34,280 --> 00:13:43,400
And then you get to be the butterfly stage and then you go back into the squeeze stage, right? And there's, I don't think there's any escaping that.
221
00:13:43,400 --> 00:13:49,800
I don't think you really wouldn't want to if you understood it, right? I think that's the same.
222
00:13:49,800 --> 00:13:51,160
Right.
223
00:13:51,160 --> 00:13:56,280
I'm, I feel like I'm so close to like it finally clicking in my brain where I'm like,
224
00:13:57,320 --> 00:14:03,720
Oh, I embrace this because I understand that without it, I wouldn't be
225
00:14:04,520 --> 00:14:13,400
evolving or becoming or I wouldn't be able to feel whatever the answer is, right? Like really getting the necessity of that expansion and contraction
226
00:14:13,400 --> 00:14:16,200
and therefore embracing all parts of it.
227
00:14:16,200 --> 00:14:24,120
Yes. Yes. And even just the whole idea of that wave and even our emotional spectrum,
228
00:14:24,920 --> 00:14:29,240
you know, a lot of times when we're going through the hard times, our, our
229
00:14:30,280 --> 00:14:38,120
instinct is, is to, you know, try to find the silver lining. Like I was just thinking, you know, a major surgery, like when I had my hip replaced,
230
00:14:39,400 --> 00:14:43,800
I couldn't do so much of what I used to do because of the pain.
231
00:14:43,800 --> 00:14:53,720
Then when the hippo was replaced, the recovery freaking sucked. I hated life. I, I don't like being in hospitals. Like they freaked me out.
232
00:14:54,360 --> 00:15:01,000
I don't know why, but, um, and just being in the hospital for a few days, it was, it was horrible.
233
00:15:01,560 --> 00:15:10,680
You know, and then the whole thing, but I'm not going to in those times sit there and say, Oh, this is so amazing because I'm about to grow.
234
00:15:10,680 --> 00:15:17,960
And healing, but no, I embrace the sock. You know, that was what someone used to say in the military, like all the time, just embrace the sock. It's a part of it.
235
00:15:18,520 --> 00:15:22,120
Yeah. Yeah. Totally. Yeah. I think that, uh,
236
00:15:23,000 --> 00:15:31,960
I really like that with working out or like lifting weights because you kind of have that same feeling where you're like, I can't do another rep.
237
00:15:31,960 --> 00:15:38,040
And then you're like, yes, I can write or I can't run for another 10 minutes at this speed or whatever it is.
238
00:15:38,040 --> 00:15:49,240
And there's always more in you than you know, and sometimes just embracing that it's shitty and you're going through it is what gets you to 15 reps instead of 12 reps.
239
00:15:49,240 --> 00:16:00,520
Right. Like there's something about that leaning into it and knowing that it's going to hurt, but also knowing that the hurt is good kind of hurt.
240
00:16:01,800 --> 00:16:03,800
I think that's valuable.
241
00:16:03,800 --> 00:16:12,280
Being able to decipher in your life, what is the kind of hurt that's like harming me and making me shrivel up and be afraid?
242
00:16:12,280 --> 00:16:19,800
And what is the kind of hurt that's expanding me and being able to recognize a difference so that I know where to put my boundaries?
243
00:16:21,800 --> 00:16:26,040
Yeah, that just reminded me. I got a brag about one of the guys I'm working with.
244
00:16:26,040 --> 00:16:28,040
He's so cool. He's a Marine veteran.
245
00:16:28,040 --> 00:16:29,640
And, um,
246
00:16:29,640 --> 00:16:37,560
we worked on a bunch of stuff and then he was good, you know, so we stopped talking as much, you know, check ins and stuff.
247
00:16:37,560 --> 00:16:42,920
Then he got into a relationship and then called me and asked if we can, you know, talk again.
248
00:16:42,920 --> 00:16:47,320
And it was one of those instances. The relationship wasn't good.
249
00:16:47,320 --> 00:16:53,320
There was a lot of baggage that came in and it was putting a divide between them.
250
00:16:53,320 --> 00:16:57,320
And I think that's what I'm talking about.
251
00:16:57,320 --> 00:17:07,320
The pain that came in between them and he got to the point where he recognized that like, all right, this pain is now bringing me backwards.
252
00:17:07,320 --> 00:17:09,320
I'm going back into old patterns.
253
00:17:09,320 --> 00:17:15,320
So they broke the relationship off and again now here's more, but there's hurt.
254
00:17:15,320 --> 00:17:19,320
But this is the hurt that I need in my life right now.
255
00:17:19,320 --> 00:17:25,320
You know, I need to go through this and the moves that he made without any questions, without any, like, needing advice.
256
00:17:25,320 --> 00:17:37,320
He wouldn't have been able to do it like a year ago, you know, and I was just like, oh my God, this is so amazing watching the proof of the growth that he has had.
257
00:17:37,320 --> 00:17:38,320
Yeah.
258
00:17:38,320 --> 00:17:47,320
Recognizing like, like this is the pain I need in my life right now because look at, look at already the change of where I'm going compared to where I was with this other type of pain.
259
00:17:47,320 --> 00:17:48,320
Yes. Yeah.
260
00:17:48,320 --> 00:17:53,320
Beautifully said. And I think that's one of the strong things about life.
261
00:17:53,320 --> 00:18:03,320
Coaching right teaching people how to be self aware how to be the watcher how to understand what's going on for them so that they can make better choices.
262
00:18:03,320 --> 00:18:05,320
Yeah.
263
00:18:05,320 --> 00:18:22,320
Yeah, just yeah recognizing those habits that we have, you know, and it's what drew me to it and what made me fall in love with coaching is looking being able to look at my head and my head.
264
00:18:22,320 --> 00:18:37,320
And my brain, like as its own culture, you know, taking that the anthropology part of school and like putting it into that and seeing why I do what I do.
265
00:18:37,320 --> 00:18:45,320
It all comes down to how I interpret the experiences so again we go back to that language that we use to describe our experiences.
266
00:18:45,320 --> 00:18:47,320
Yep.
267
00:18:47,320 --> 00:18:55,320
Yeah, I think it's really interesting how unconscious we can be about ourselves.
268
00:18:55,320 --> 00:18:56,320
Yeah.
269
00:18:56,320 --> 00:19:02,320
You know, and you don't even know that you don't know yourself or you don't know you've been fooling yourself. Right.
270
00:19:02,320 --> 00:19:04,320
And it happens to all of us.
271
00:19:04,320 --> 00:19:16,320
And as you know we've been going through this journey of trying to be more and more authentic present our art to the world, find out what my gifts are that I really have to offer.
272
00:19:16,320 --> 00:19:26,320
I've been asking myself that question like who am I really in what ways am I unconscious to my own self.
273
00:19:26,320 --> 00:19:36,320
And when this thing came up with this client this last week, I realized, you know what, I am a really highly sensitive person.
274
00:19:36,320 --> 00:19:48,320
And there's a couple different kinds of empathy, and like, it's very common for autistic people to not have the kind of empathy that's like the mental kind like I see you crying I know you're sad.
275
00:19:48,320 --> 00:19:59,320
But they have more of like the somatic empathy where they like feel another person's emotions, and then they're not even sure if it's their emotions or the other person's right like it's really an energetic thing.
276
00:19:59,320 --> 00:20:04,320
And I realized, I am very much that way.
277
00:20:04,320 --> 00:20:24,320
And my whole life I have pretended to be tougher than that and pretended that that's not true about me. And this client brought it up because as I was grieving this decision and the language in my head kept saying something like tough enough why is this bothering you so much like,
278
00:20:24,320 --> 00:20:43,320
I was beating myself out of my sensitivity, right. And I thought, oh wait a second like time out this is a time for me to recognize what's happening inside of me and that there is this part of me that I have been not fully conscious about, you know, and so
279
00:20:43,320 --> 00:21:00,320
it had me ask two questions one, how can I share this gift with the world, right being really sensitive. And two, how do I design my life honoring that truth about myself.
280
00:21:00,320 --> 00:21:21,320
Yeah, there's so much like, and that that's like the miracle of meaning. You know what I mean, like, because we asked that question, why am I feeling this way, you know, toughen up suck it up stop being a bitch we and we go into those habitual language patterns that we use that that tear us down as if you can tell
281
00:21:21,320 --> 00:21:34,320
yourself toughen up and then you won't feel it anymore. Right, right, you know, like how many times like how many times you actually do that and then how many times you feel better by telling yourself just toughen up.
282
00:21:34,320 --> 00:21:40,320
Right, never. Right, but when you find the meaning for something.
283
00:21:40,320 --> 00:21:56,320
And when you find the meaning could be anything like we get to make that up but when we see the meaning for it. Then that's when things start to like relax so it's not about again like denying what we're feeling we can't do that you're going to feel it
284
00:21:56,320 --> 00:21:57,320
anyways.
285
00:21:57,320 --> 00:22:05,320
Right, you know, instead you're just putting fuel on that fire of feeling that way I mean I do that to myself, all the freaking time.
286
00:22:05,320 --> 00:22:20,320
And I think it comes from a lot of cultural programming and our child is right, I can remember so many times, my mom being so frustrated with me and just saying like why are you making such a big deal out of this like you're making a mountain out of a molehill stop
287
00:22:20,320 --> 00:22:36,320
and making a big right those messages that whatever I was the way that I was responding to a situation was too much. Right, I was feeling it too much I was experiencing it too much and I needed to shut it down to make it easier on everybody else around me.
288
00:22:36,320 --> 00:22:38,320
Yeah.
289
00:22:38,320 --> 00:22:43,320
Yeah, that is a hard.
290
00:22:43,320 --> 00:22:59,320
Hard thread to on weave right I'm trying to like back it out of my psyche and on weave that thread of this picture of like no, even if it makes people uncomfortable around me I can experience whatever I'm experiencing.
291
00:22:59,320 --> 00:23:14,320
Yeah. Yeah, but because it becomes like it's so ingrained in us it becomes part of our like unconscious programming we don't even know and like you said, like understanding why we're doing what we're doing knowing ourselves.
292
00:23:14,320 --> 00:23:19,320
Yeah, that's why it's I mean it's so important to do it.
293
00:23:19,320 --> 00:23:21,320
And it's fun.
294
00:23:21,320 --> 00:23:40,320
Oh my god yeah yeah. You would never go to a gymnast or somebody that's like, you know one of those crazy martial artists it's doing like the flips like the cap aware stuff like that and, and the people that have such knowledge of how they move what they can do.
295
00:23:40,320 --> 00:23:45,320
You never put them down for training like that but when it comes to the mind.
296
00:23:45,320 --> 00:23:48,320
I want to know who I like stupid.
297
00:23:48,320 --> 00:24:03,320
You know what I mean like, why, yeah, strengthening your mind so that you can use it in the same way but a mentally emotionally, you know, yeah it's just a weird thing.
298
00:24:03,320 --> 00:24:06,320
Yeah, I'm beginning to think more and more.
299
00:24:06,320 --> 00:24:13,320
And this is like a weird out there conspiracy, like I will own it.
300
00:24:13,320 --> 00:24:36,320
That our country or culture is set up to shame us and to keep us from doing that right from becoming awake from knowing ourselves, like intentionally, because you look at other, you know cultures or you know tribes and other places and you notice, they all have a deep connection to
301
00:24:36,320 --> 00:24:54,320
yourself, a deep connection to like your birth song, right your birth note right that coming home to yourself, spending time in silence going on walkabouts right like, but in our culture, we've taken every little piece that connects us to ourselves
302
00:24:54,320 --> 00:24:55,320
away.
303
00:24:55,320 --> 00:25:04,320
And we've said here replace it with religion that we control and politics we control right and it's just.
304
00:25:04,320 --> 00:25:14,320
I'm feeling more and more the need of freedom from our current culture.
305
00:25:14,320 --> 00:25:22,320
And I don't know what that looks like and honestly it scares me to even say that that that's coming up for me.
306
00:25:22,320 --> 00:25:40,320
I mean, that's that goes deep man, because I completely get that, you know and I, I, I 100% agree I mean, like you said like all these other cultures have all these right of passages where you learn how, how to be a part of man a woman in in your
307
00:25:40,320 --> 00:25:53,320
life, you know, connects you more with it, you know connects you more with your, with yourself, you know you learn about your ancestors your history where you come from all that stuff.
308
00:25:53,320 --> 00:26:02,320
You know at age what five we go into kindergarten six or something and all at that point we're always told what to do. This is what you have to do.
309
00:26:02,320 --> 00:26:17,320
And that lasts all the way up to where, you know, whatever 2324 graduate college, and then you go into the workforce and that's why you have to go through all that education so you go in the workforce where you always have a manager somebody telling you what to do.
310
00:26:17,320 --> 00:26:31,320
And we just become a cog in a machine and I really feel, I don't know much about this but I know the Rockefellers like he had a he had a quote that said, um, we need a nation of workers not a nation of workers.
311
00:26:31,320 --> 00:26:33,320
Not a nation of thinkers.
312
00:26:33,320 --> 00:26:39,320
And he started investing heavily in the educational system.
313
00:26:39,320 --> 00:27:00,320
And I mean, even with the same thing with the pharmaceutical stuff you know, most of the, or I guess a lot of the textbooks or all the textbooks that they use the Rockefellers got into and what and put in took out the natural medicines and put in the synthesized medicines that have incredibly horrible side effects.
314
00:27:00,320 --> 00:27:11,320
Yeah, it's crazy when you think about what can you really trust, right, if you live in a society that was not really built for your best interests.
315
00:27:11,320 --> 00:27:20,320
Yeah, it was it was built to shore up we were the foundation for those above us.
316
00:27:20,320 --> 00:27:28,320
You know, we keep the power in their hands we keep the economy running and all the money filters to them and.
317
00:27:28,320 --> 00:27:32,320
Yeah, yeah you know what I was thinking about the other day.
318
00:27:32,320 --> 00:27:37,320
I tried to tell my husband he didn't think it was as cool see if you think it's cool.
319
00:27:37,320 --> 00:28:00,320
I was thinking about all of history, and this moment that we got to be alive. When we are the last generation before the internet and seeing the dawn of the next error of humanity, because things are crazy changing right very fast, exponentially.
320
00:28:00,320 --> 00:28:18,320
We still had summers where we ran around all side, all, you know, all day and our parents locked us out of the house and we went ravines, jumped on train cars and we had this wildness, and then we also see the world changing like,
321
00:28:18,320 --> 00:28:29,320
I think I'd pick this time again if I was picking out of a timeline. Yeah, it's kind of scary but man is it interesting, like what a time to be alive.
322
00:28:29,320 --> 00:28:36,320
So my video. Sorry my dog, my dad is dropping off a car for me.
323
00:28:36,320 --> 00:28:39,320
So my dog is going nuts because she sees them.
324
00:28:39,320 --> 00:28:50,320
But yeah I just saw a video where remember those commercials where they had like stars and it was always in the news like hey it's 10 o'clock where you do you know where your kids are.
325
00:28:50,320 --> 00:29:08,320
And that was just completely coming from I mean, go out, you know I have a cell phone, you have no communication. And there's like a rule of like when the street lights turn on or my dad always had this whistle, and we knew it was him we like miles away and that's when we come home.
326
00:29:08,320 --> 00:29:29,320
I saw some kind of meme posted about you know kids of the 80s and 90s, and then it was asking people to share their experiences of summertime, and it was the coolest thread to read because yeah we did crazy stuff, and people you know you got hurt but you just sucked it up and put some dirt on it it was fine.
327
00:29:29,320 --> 00:29:40,320
Yeah, oh, say, Sandy's grandmother would do a turpentine. Yeah, like if it was like a I mean a deep car or something you would like dip it in turpentine for some reason.
328
00:29:40,320 --> 00:29:41,320
It's funny.
329
00:29:41,320 --> 00:29:43,320
Weird man yeah.
330
00:29:43,320 --> 00:29:54,320
Yeah, I can remember my sister and I had this big hill next to our house. And we thought that if we ran fast enough and jumped we would fly a little bit.
331
00:29:54,320 --> 00:30:03,320
And I catch, you know, like, oh we're like flying powers. And like that's what we would spend our time doing running up and down this hill trying to fly.
332
00:30:03,320 --> 00:30:09,320
Yeah, like that's so grateful for that childhood.
333
00:30:09,320 --> 00:30:24,320
And I'm grateful now, like all the stuff you and I are learning about the internet and how people connect and how humanity and business is changing and like fully leaning into this virtual world that exists now.
334
00:30:24,320 --> 00:30:28,320
And how cool to have both of those things.
335
00:30:28,320 --> 00:30:31,320
And we're the only generation that can say that.
336
00:30:31,320 --> 00:30:35,320
It's a good point I never thought of it like that. That's a really good point.
337
00:30:35,320 --> 00:30:39,320
And it makes really seem like a fun time to be alive.
338
00:30:39,320 --> 00:30:43,320
Yeah, I mean me and you never would have met.
339
00:30:43,320 --> 00:30:47,320
Yeah, that's pretty interesting.
340
00:30:47,320 --> 00:31:01,320
I wonder if like historically there's going to be like a name for for our generation like with that, you know, I think so because I think, you know, if we're alive hundreds of years from now, we don't kill ourselves as a species.
341
00:31:01,320 --> 00:31:12,320
This point in time will be a huge shift. Right. It'll be like the Industrial Revolution or something right it's going to be a huge shift in the way humanity operates.
342
00:31:12,320 --> 00:31:24,320
And I saw a great quote by Buck Meister Fuller, the other day that said, Oh, it's a neck and neck race, we will either evolve or will become extinct.
343
00:31:24,320 --> 00:31:39,320
Like, and that actually made me feel kind of like at peace, that it's not going to go on just bad forever because we're at a crux right now where we either need to figure it out and get along, or we will all die.
344
00:31:39,320 --> 00:31:42,320
Yeah, great completely.
345
00:31:42,320 --> 00:31:46,320
You know, and that's unique to history.
346
00:31:46,320 --> 00:31:52,320
And so that's a cool thing to be alive for and see what's going to happen.
347
00:31:52,320 --> 00:31:55,320
Yeah.
348
00:31:55,320 --> 00:31:57,320
Um,
349
00:31:57,320 --> 00:32:00,320
can we call it quick time out real fast.
350
00:32:00,320 --> 00:32:04,320
We'll edit this one out. I'll be right back.
351
00:32:04,320 --> 00:32:07,320
Pause.
352
00:32:07,320 --> 00:32:12,320
So your dad dropped off a car for you.
353
00:32:12,320 --> 00:32:22,320
Yeah, yeah, so I got to use it tonight to go to pool. Because then, because say Sandy goes to but then she leaves really early.
354
00:32:22,320 --> 00:32:27,320
Since she's like up at like four in the morning, like a crazy person.
355
00:32:27,320 --> 00:32:36,320
So yeah, and then he would just give me an update on my mom and stuff who's at a rehab facility now, like, learning how to walk again and stuff.
356
00:32:36,320 --> 00:32:41,320
Yeah, again, just what we were saying right like, how old your mom in her 70s.
357
00:32:41,320 --> 00:32:42,320
Yeah.
358
00:32:42,320 --> 00:32:49,320
So, you know, it's never ending right the challenges the growth the learning the all of it.
359
00:32:49,320 --> 00:32:50,320
Yeah.
360
00:32:50,320 --> 00:32:55,320
Yeah, and it gets very, very hard sometimes but it's a part of the process.
361
00:32:55,320 --> 00:33:09,320
Yeah, I feel like the self investigation in midlife is so necessary to not be afraid in the final chapters.
362
00:33:09,320 --> 00:33:16,320
Right, you know, when we're young, it's like, oh, we're going to do this and we're pushing out we're the bursting, you know, star.
363
00:33:16,320 --> 00:33:24,320
And then midlife I think a lot of people are like, wait, who the fuck am I, what's happening, what the fuck is this human experience.
364
00:33:24,320 --> 00:33:26,320
And we start to go inward.
365
00:33:26,320 --> 00:33:36,320
And then as our body diminishes, hopefully, this inner thing gets stronger and stronger and when it's time to let go of our bodies.
366
00:33:36,320 --> 00:33:38,320
We're ready.
367
00:33:38,320 --> 00:33:42,320
And that's what I hope that this journey is like.
368
00:33:42,320 --> 00:33:49,320
And it does, it does make sense because I used to be very afraid of dying.
369
00:33:49,320 --> 00:33:59,320
You know, even, even like in my darkest moments where I didn't want to be alive. You know, I wasn't suicidal but I just didn't want to be alive.
370
00:33:59,320 --> 00:34:11,320
I was still scared to death of dying. And now, after doing a lot of this self reflection and actually learning about what I truly believe.
371
00:34:11,320 --> 00:34:22,320
Like, I don't, I don't believe in dying. You know, because it's who I am that the consciousness part of me will continue.
372
00:34:22,320 --> 00:34:31,320
And that's the ultimate, you know, contraction right back to nothing and then it's your first day of being something else.
373
00:34:31,320 --> 00:34:40,320
Your last day of being Keith and this body. I really believe is your first day of the beginning of another expansion.
374
00:34:40,320 --> 00:34:54,320
We don't know what, right. But you know, our moments are like this our days our years, but in our life just be one big and then another expansion into something new.
375
00:34:54,320 --> 00:34:56,320
Dude, wow.
376
00:34:56,320 --> 00:34:58,320
Yeah.
377
00:34:58,320 --> 00:35:12,320
And what's that, what's that saying like as above so below you know what I mean but and like, yeah, our days are like that are our years are like I mean everything is like that so why wouldn't the totality of our lives be the same way.
378
00:35:12,320 --> 00:35:18,320
Right. And some huge cosmic scale that we can even understand.
379
00:35:18,320 --> 00:35:19,320
Right.
380
00:35:19,320 --> 00:35:21,320
Yeah.
381
00:35:21,320 --> 00:35:32,320
Maybe you'll be a star next time maybe you'll be your energy is going to be part of something else right but we know that it's not disappearing because we know energy doesn't disappear.
382
00:35:32,320 --> 00:35:40,320
And everything has a life cycle to it, you know, oh I mean you got the water cycle you got I mean a cycle of the rocks.
383
00:35:40,320 --> 00:36:03,320
You know, I mean, we think of time we sort of corral time into this meaning of what we can experience in our lifetime. You know, but but time is this infinite thing, you know, so I mean to rocks it might take millions of years for like El Capitan to like be regenerated going
384
00:36:03,320 --> 00:36:08,320
through back into the earth and everything but even even there's a carbon cycle.
385
00:36:08,320 --> 00:36:26,320
You know, when I die we release the carbon that that makes us up into the back of the atmosphere so we can have the carbon of dinosaurs or gang is Khan you know somebody from history like in us right now being a part of us.
386
00:36:26,320 --> 00:36:27,320
Yeah.
387
00:36:27,320 --> 00:36:29,320
Yeah.
388
00:36:29,320 --> 00:36:31,320
Oh cool.
389
00:36:31,320 --> 00:36:34,320
Yeah, I love it.
390
00:36:34,320 --> 00:36:37,320
It's such an expansive view.
391
00:36:37,320 --> 00:36:41,320
Yeah, then just thinking about the energy.
392
00:36:41,320 --> 00:36:57,320
So imagine like I mean somebody in history I mean, even taking like great great like religious leaders, you know, like a Buddha Jesus, Muhammad, like we can have the energy of them, still in us.
393
00:36:57,320 --> 00:37:00,320
That's crazy.
394
00:37:00,320 --> 00:37:03,320
Yeah.
395
00:37:03,320 --> 00:37:20,320
And maybe it's you know like we talk about it's the intention and awareness that either lets things be seen and known or remain hidden. Right so if your intention and awareness is on negativity.
396
00:37:20,320 --> 00:37:22,320
That's more right.
397
00:37:22,320 --> 00:37:30,320
But if it's more on your Mohammed consciousness or your Jesus consciousness.
398
00:37:30,320 --> 00:37:34,320
And that is right there.
399
00:37:34,320 --> 00:37:44,320
And even like Sadguru talks about like that brings us back to the Garden of Eden where where when they ate of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil for the first time in history.
400
00:37:44,320 --> 00:37:48,320
They have the choice to say this is bad or this is good.
401
00:37:48,320 --> 00:37:54,320
You know so since our mind has a negativity bias built in it's easy to go that way.
402
00:37:54,320 --> 00:37:59,320
But negativity is associated with the fight or flight response.
403
00:37:59,320 --> 00:38:02,320
You know so it's a survival mechanism.
404
00:38:02,320 --> 00:38:06,320
And what that survival is about the cell.
405
00:38:06,320 --> 00:38:15,320
You know, like so it draws our focus, like inward towards us where everything else outside of us is a threat.
406
00:38:15,320 --> 00:38:16,320
Yes.
407
00:38:16,320 --> 00:38:23,320
You know but but the positive is an expansive and like when you were talking about the expansion the contraction and another one.
408
00:38:23,320 --> 00:38:29,320
So negativity is good because it kept us alive for so many years as we were hunter-gatherers.
409
00:38:29,320 --> 00:38:39,320
You know but the one thing that was stronger or at least equal to in our survival was the community.
410
00:38:39,320 --> 00:38:41,320
This is the expansive part.
411
00:38:41,320 --> 00:38:46,320
It's the connection we can't see everybody else in the world as a threat.
412
00:38:46,320 --> 00:38:55,320
So what we could do if we just had respect for each other, imagine the technological advancements that can be made.
413
00:38:55,320 --> 00:38:57,320
Yes.
414
00:38:57,320 --> 00:39:03,320
And when humans connect, they are so much more powerful.
415
00:39:03,320 --> 00:39:04,320
Right.
416
00:39:04,320 --> 00:39:12,320
And that's why I love you know because you and I both come from a Christian tradition, the verse that says you know when two or more gathered in my name there I am.
417
00:39:12,320 --> 00:39:29,320
I love that verse since childhood and while I wouldn't put it towards the Christian God anymore, I would say that is my experience in life when people are gathered with an open heart, two or more, there is a power that exists there.
418
00:39:29,320 --> 00:39:37,320
Right. And imagine if you could do that collectively of 100 people, a thousand people, a million people.
419
00:39:37,320 --> 00:39:44,320
The possibilities are endless. That's why when people say like oh like I have no hope for this world or this future.
420
00:39:44,320 --> 00:39:51,320
I'm like it's actually not that hard it's just a different direction than we're looking right now.
421
00:39:51,320 --> 00:39:53,320
Yeah.
422
00:39:53,320 --> 00:39:57,320
You just kind of look for and sees things in a way we've never seen them right.
423
00:39:57,320 --> 00:40:05,320
Right. Right. It's just the opposite side of the same coin. I mean you have the world that we have. We have the societies that we have.
424
00:40:05,320 --> 00:40:16,320
You know so we can focus completely on the one side of the issues that come with it or we can focus on the other side like you know I am going to be open.
425
00:40:16,320 --> 00:40:25,320
You know I am not going to look at everybody in my life that comes at me even if they're like yelling at me or whatever as a threat to me because they're not.
426
00:40:25,320 --> 00:40:26,320
Yeah.
427
00:40:26,320 --> 00:40:33,320
You know I'm going to save that for the people that actually are threat like if somebody comes up and punches me in the face. Okay you're a threat.
428
00:40:33,320 --> 00:40:55,320
Yeah. You know it's funny about this is last night was the presidential debate and my husband said babe I don't think I can watch this because we used to be people who were very aware and involved with news and politics and doing our best to make a difference and both of us have sort of retreated from that because of our own mental wellness.
429
00:40:55,320 --> 00:40:56,320
Yeah.
430
00:40:56,320 --> 00:41:07,320
I said I'm not going to hear anything in that debate that's going to change my mind. Right. So it's only going to stir up negative emotions.
431
00:41:07,320 --> 00:41:12,320
I think that I would be better service to the world.
432
00:41:12,320 --> 00:41:27,320
I would be better in comedy and laughing my ass off, meditating feeling peace feeling love like whatever vibration of like positive vibrations I can wait all the negativity that I know is out there happening tonight.
433
00:41:27,320 --> 00:41:37,320
That's more powerful than me watching this show on television right and letting it pull me down.
434
00:41:37,320 --> 00:41:50,320
I think that's what I'm talking about like the switch in my mind of how I'm making a difference in the world. And I sound like a crazy person to myself.
435
00:41:50,320 --> 00:41:53,320
But it's becoming more and more real to me.
436
00:41:53,320 --> 00:41:55,320
Yeah.
437
00:41:55,320 --> 00:42:02,320
Yeah, I watched about five minutes of it. And then I started feeling horrible.
438
00:42:02,320 --> 00:42:17,320
I was feeling angry. Just being like, what the fuck, you know, like this is where we're at and then like, why am I doing that? You know, especially because I felt bad because it was it was like my smoking time too.
439
00:42:17,320 --> 00:42:21,320
I don't want to waste that feeling.
440
00:42:21,320 --> 00:42:33,320
You know, because it is an expansive feeling for me. That's why like I've made it a part of this for me to smoke before we come on and I think you're kind of doing the same thing.
441
00:42:33,320 --> 00:42:36,320
I just had.
442
00:42:36,320 --> 00:42:59,320
I was in Connecticut when I got my medical marijuana card, the lady that brought me through the program told me this little trick that she has where she saves the last little bit of every every strain that she gets she saves the last little bit and puts it in one canister.
443
00:42:59,320 --> 00:43:09,320
So I had this little pill bottle for like five years now. And when I have less than a bowl left, I just dump it in there so it's full with like 30 different strains.
444
00:43:09,320 --> 00:43:14,320
And it will send you flying.
445
00:43:14,320 --> 00:43:29,320
And so that one time I, my uncle's friend was over and and I gave some to him we're having like a family party. And like an hour later he was like dude, your nephew's we just fucked me up.
446
00:43:29,320 --> 00:43:45,320
Yeah, I call it either Keith's Kush or burning rainbow because I had a little bit of everything you know, like that. Yeah, and it's, it just it makes me feel so open and accepting and full of like loving gratitude because that's where my focus goes.
447
00:43:45,320 --> 00:43:48,320
So I train my folks to go when I use it.
448
00:43:48,320 --> 00:43:54,320
You know, so I don't want to watch something that is going to make me feel that way.
449
00:43:54,320 --> 00:43:56,320
Yeah.
450
00:43:56,320 --> 00:44:08,320
I'll comment on that but first I stick with something usually called lucid blue, like for my everyday type of stuff because it's like, high focus high creativity.
451
00:44:08,320 --> 00:44:13,320
You know, like it's it's sativa so it's lots of energy, you know focus creativity.
452
00:44:13,320 --> 00:44:21,320
And then I have like a little thing it's MCT oil is that what you call it that's an indica for like nighttime.
453
00:44:21,320 --> 00:44:44,320
And then I like to use that I take it before bed and then I listen to a guided meditation. And then it's kind of like, what do you call the dreams you can control the lucid dreams kind of like lucid dreaming because I have all these chemicals, you know, letting me go and then this like guided, you know, it's very fun.
454
00:44:44,320 --> 00:44:48,320
So those are the two that I usually use in two different directions.
455
00:44:48,320 --> 00:44:52,320
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I love that man.
456
00:44:52,320 --> 00:44:53,320
That's pretty cool.
457
00:44:53,320 --> 00:45:04,320
You know, and a lot of a lot of people are finding medicine. You know, I was working with a client yesterday, and he's just professional successful.
458
00:45:04,320 --> 00:45:25,320
And those warriors on the front line working for rep, rep creations for black people in our country. I mean, such a beautiful, strong warrior. And he was talking about weed and how he uses it, and how it's a part of his recipe to be able to show up and it was just beautiful.
459
00:45:25,320 --> 00:45:37,320
And his people aren't using it to cover up and mask as much as they are using it as a scalpel to go in and find what they're looking for.
460
00:45:37,320 --> 00:45:50,320
And it is such a beautiful tool. In fact, one of one of the things I can't say one of the first things I think it was, it was domesticated about 35,000 years ago.
461
00:45:50,320 --> 00:46:11,320
I mean, he was one of the first plants ever domesticated, but about 5000 years ago. And I'm not going to remember the name but there was a Chinese emperor that like dabbled in like surgeries and stuff and and what do they call it like a pharma kipia or something like that like where you write your, like the plants and
462
00:46:11,320 --> 00:46:24,320
stuff that you use for medicine. And he would use cannabis to do like small surgeries, like being appendix or something like that.
463
00:46:24,320 --> 00:46:31,320
And, and he even like recommended it for colicky babies.
464
00:46:31,320 --> 00:46:46,320
He had like this whole list of stuff that you would use cannabis for. So just thinking about it being like a scalpel to go inward and kind of do that that self work, you know and one of its first uses.
465
00:46:46,320 --> 00:46:52,320
Again, not maybe not first but one of its uses was for surgeries you know, it's kind of cool.
466
00:46:52,320 --> 00:47:02,320
Yeah, I read about this tribe that does babies in their eye with a tiny bit of ayahuasca.
467
00:47:02,320 --> 00:47:15,320
Because to them in their culture, knowing your inner spiritual world and your spiritual guide and your ancestors and all that is of equal importance as knowing how to like go gather food in the field.
468
00:47:15,320 --> 00:47:24,320
And at the time you're a baby you're trained. This is how you go on your spiritual journey. This is how you go on your physical journey, and both are cultivated.
469
00:47:24,320 --> 00:47:27,320
And I've never heard anything so beautiful in my life.
470
00:47:27,320 --> 00:47:33,320
I was about to say that is just freaking beautiful, because that is a part of us that we have.
471
00:47:33,320 --> 00:47:41,320
We have completely turned our back on that spiritual side. And it's another part again like I'm not a spiritual person will bullshit you are.
472
00:47:41,320 --> 00:47:43,320
Right, you can't not.
473
00:47:43,320 --> 00:47:50,320
You can't be that part of yourself. Yeah, many of us don't feel connected with self.
474
00:47:50,320 --> 00:47:53,320
And I think that goes hand in hand.
475
00:47:53,320 --> 00:47:55,320
Yeah.
476
00:47:55,320 --> 00:48:11,320
Yeah, and so that's, you know, if that's something that you choose to do, you have to take a stand to sort of rebel against current culture, if you're going to prioritize your spiritual journey equal to your physical journey.
477
00:48:11,320 --> 00:48:23,320
That's what you and I are trying to do right build lives and businesses that support us in an equal spiritual and physical.
478
00:48:23,320 --> 00:48:29,320
Yeah, and I truly believe that is the next evolutionary step that we're going to face.
479
00:48:29,320 --> 00:48:45,320
Or I don't know, maybe it's not maybe it's not an evolutionary step but a healing step a collective healing step that the just the human population needs to take to to learn how to re accept the spiritual side of self.
480
00:48:45,320 --> 00:48:46,320
Yeah.
481
00:48:46,320 --> 00:49:00,320
How do you think that could happen. I mean I see it happening a lot with younger people and there's, you know, oldies like you and me clinging to the edge of this movement and, but there's also a lot of people who are.
482
00:49:00,320 --> 00:49:03,320
I'll bring it back to the reptilian brain.
483
00:49:03,320 --> 00:49:15,320
So when you're in your reptile brain, you cannot think logic is not accessible to you. You, you know, fight, flight, fawn freeze. That's it.
484
00:49:15,320 --> 00:49:19,320
So many people are living there permanently.
485
00:49:19,320 --> 00:49:26,320
Yes, these people on the internet, getting crazy angry over a meme.
486
00:49:26,320 --> 00:49:31,320
And you're like, Oh my gosh that reptile brain is really active.
487
00:49:31,320 --> 00:49:49,320
How do we get enough safety in the world so that people come into their cortex and they don't have to stay in that survival part of their brain because that's what's necessary. If we're talking about like a big evolution for humanity.
488
00:49:49,320 --> 00:50:01,320
I think like my mind automatically goes to my whole thing about like never feeling that that strong desire to help somebody.
489
00:50:01,320 --> 00:50:11,320
Because I believe like, I can advise guide whatever you want to call it but but the work can only be done by the person.
490
00:50:11,320 --> 00:50:22,320
So there's really nothing I could do to help like in that way. I think it's like the quote from Jane Goodall. If you want to change someone's mind, you have to touch their heart.
491
00:50:22,320 --> 00:50:27,320
And so many times.
492
00:50:27,320 --> 00:50:33,320
Since I've been doing this, people have looked at me like I'm a pushover.
493
00:50:33,320 --> 00:50:50,320
I'm just like woo woo, whatever, you know, they downplay what I'm doing. But what I've noticed over time is that those same people are starting to do things that are kind of the same thing.
494
00:50:50,320 --> 00:50:52,320
They're opening up more.
495
00:50:52,320 --> 00:51:12,320
You know, and I think that there's going to be people that never do it, you know, because of a belief system that they have that is too scary for them to let go of, which drives that anger because now your disbelief and something I believe is now a threat to me because if you don't believe it,
496
00:51:12,320 --> 00:51:20,320
maybe there's maybe there's cracks and what I'm what I believe in here, maybe there's something's not right and I can't accept that. It's too painful.
497
00:51:20,320 --> 00:51:27,320
And I really believe the best way to do it is to live the example.
498
00:51:27,320 --> 00:51:40,320
You know, and I go back to, you know, our past grown up in Christianity, I feel closer to God now than I ever did when I was in church.
499
00:51:40,320 --> 00:51:54,320
The verses that talk about they have ears to hear don't hear they have eyes to see and don't see like and then when it like it talks about like the scales falling off their eyes and all that like I feel that I connect with that now.
500
00:51:54,320 --> 00:52:11,320
And I mean, because it all comes down to this for me like, I believe it was Paul that said, all the law. So all the commandments that people run to in the Bible, to hate on others.
501
00:52:11,320 --> 00:52:17,320
He said, all the law is summed up in one thing, love thy neighbor as I self.
502
00:52:17,320 --> 00:52:35,320
And then in James it talks about by their fruits, he shall know them and in Galatians it gives you the fruit of the spirit, and it's love, joy, peace, long suffer, you know, so it's living those things.
503
00:52:35,320 --> 00:52:41,320
And I think the more we live them for ourselves.
504
00:52:41,320 --> 00:52:55,320
The more that vibration spreads outward. And regardless of what we say, it will impact other people other people will be affected by that energy.
505
00:52:55,320 --> 00:52:57,320
Yeah.
506
00:52:57,320 --> 00:53:18,320
And I think that's what you made me think that would be a really interesting. I don't even know what to call it like horse exploration exploratory patron group, right where it's based on the fruit of the spirit, but not from a Christian perspective.
507
00:53:18,320 --> 00:53:36,320
Right. Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness and so control like those are all beautiful attributes and thinking about how to live into those and how to model those to other people would be a beautiful exploration.
508
00:53:36,320 --> 00:53:53,320
And that's what going inward and an understanding how my mind works helped me, because now I don't know what was a couple I mean, maybe six months ago now me and Sandy were driving and a guy ran a red light cut us off.
509
00:53:53,320 --> 00:54:02,320
And we almost T boned them and then you know luckily there was no accident and then he slammed on his brakes and he looked at me and gave me the finger.
510
00:54:02,320 --> 00:54:14,320
And I fall. I can see now like okay he's he's reactive. He's pissed he's angry he's in a rush to the point where he doesn't care about his own physical safety or anybody else's.
511
00:54:14,320 --> 00:54:23,320
So he's reactive he is in that reptilian brain and I, you know what I mean it helps me. Again, it just it's me putting a meeting on it.
512
00:54:23,320 --> 00:54:42,320
Oh, he's an asshole. Maybe it's true. But there's a reason why he is. And I'm seeing the reason or recognizing that there is a reason and then that keeps me away from that reactive reptilian brain and and and living more through my own responsibility.
513
00:54:42,320 --> 00:54:43,320
Yes.
514
00:54:43,320 --> 00:54:48,320
And it keeps me in that in that centered place of love first.
515
00:54:48,320 --> 00:54:49,320
Yes.
516
00:54:49,320 --> 00:54:57,320
I'm laughing because I had a situation with someone where I had to build a firm boundary this week.
517
00:54:57,320 --> 00:55:08,320
I built it I communicated it. They accepted it but then like two or three days later I got a long email that was definitely not accepting it.
518
00:55:08,320 --> 00:55:22,320
And I crap I spent like three hours crafting the best most solid five paragraphs back. And you know what, I was going to change their worldview forever with my five paragraphs.
519
00:55:22,320 --> 00:55:38,320
And then I caught myself and I realized what I was doing right spending all this effort in time, trying to change the mind of someone who's in their reptile brain and they can't even access their cortex to think about what I'm saying.
520
00:55:38,320 --> 00:55:45,320
I deleted it all and said doesn't sound like it's going to work out between us right now.
521
00:55:45,320 --> 00:55:49,320
One sentence.
522
00:55:49,320 --> 00:55:55,320
Right. I don't need to engage like that.
523
00:55:55,320 --> 00:56:03,320
And because it would have, it would have been to reptile brains going back and forth my reptile their reptile my reptile, and that's not going to get us anywhere.
524
00:56:03,320 --> 00:56:11,320
Right. Right. But so many times it's what we do, you know, like we're like, like you said I'm going to change their world.
525
00:56:11,320 --> 00:56:19,320
And it never happens. You know, instead what we just do is get their argument back because especially like I remember when me and St.
526
00:56:19,320 --> 00:56:27,320
He's to argue like constantly when she was saying her piece I wasn't listening to her I was crafting my response.
527
00:56:27,320 --> 00:56:36,320
And many times like she'll be going through and I'd be like, Oh, no, she's wrong with that I'm going to get that but then here she says something else and I completely forget about this and I'm talking about this.
528
00:56:36,320 --> 00:56:43,320
So our fight would start on over here and we end up over here not knowing what we started fighting about.
529
00:56:43,320 --> 00:56:48,320
You know, just keeps switching by like a degree.
530
00:56:48,320 --> 00:57:00,320
And instead you just didn't give that person a choice to accept your boundary or not. It wasn't it wasn't their boundary to accept you just enacted it.
531
00:57:00,320 --> 00:57:12,320
Right. And when they didn't respect it. The result was saying like, Okay, goodbye then. Right. I didn't want that to be the result I wanted to change them.
532
00:57:12,320 --> 00:57:21,320
And I think about how much time I've spent in my life, thinking that I could prove somebody wrong.
533
00:57:21,320 --> 00:57:36,320
It's funny with sometimes my husband and I will start to go down that road like bigger, bigger, bigger. And then he'll say as a joke, he'll say like, That's it. I'm not going to stop fighting with you tell you admit you're stupid.
534
00:57:36,320 --> 00:57:40,320
That's what we're doing to each other right and we just call it out.
535
00:57:40,320 --> 00:57:53,320
And we just kind of laugh and go, Okay, like, let's walk away and diffuse the situation for right now because right. That's what we're in it for at that point right when you get locked in. So you're like, All right.
536
00:57:53,320 --> 00:58:06,320
Yeah, I heard this thing once I did a video on it and yeah a lot of people didn't agree with it but it was a question of is it more important to be right or to show love.
537
00:58:06,320 --> 00:58:16,320
And it was it was the context was a husband and wife. And this was part of my my coaching course they showed this video and they were on the verge of splitting up.
538
00:58:16,320 --> 00:58:22,320
And when they did an interview with them two years after this whole intervention took place.
539
00:58:22,320 --> 00:58:32,320
They were they had a better relationship than they ever had. You know, and it was all about the husband not
540
00:58:32,320 --> 00:58:47,320
knowing what the wife said it was about him not reacting to be right to allow her to feel what she feels to allow her to say what she says because when you have when you have a relationship you you communicate verbally but you also communicate non verbally even more so.
541
00:58:47,320 --> 00:59:02,320
And when changes take place that non verbal communication, even when they understand the changes, you know, me and Sandy got into an argument and I, I, there was the first time I was ever dialed in.
542
00:59:02,320 --> 00:59:14,320
And I was being respectful I was being loving I wasn't I wasn't getting angry, nothing. And she's like, What are you doing to me, you're trying to make me feel like I'm insane she I mean she was like losing it.
543
00:59:14,320 --> 00:59:27,320
She just walked away. I like went for a walk around the neighborhood and stuff and she's like, I don't know what that was like, I started freaking out thinking you were playing mind games with me.
544
00:59:27,320 --> 00:59:37,320
You know, so it when you when you set a bound especially with somebody that you've been dealing with their natural instinct is going to be to test that.
545
00:59:37,320 --> 00:59:49,320
And because they're used to this style of communication, you know, yeah, not to get it's not to get mad about just firm to that decision that boundary.
546
00:59:49,320 --> 01:00:03,320
Right, because it's for you, right to be the best version of myself, this is what I need or don't need. And if you can't do that that's fine right no judgment, but I can't change that because I'm committed to me.
547
01:00:03,320 --> 01:00:17,320
That's that's the thing I think trying to be the best version of ourselves is how we can best help all of humanity.
548
01:00:17,320 --> 01:00:30,320
Yeah, you know, because a lot of times I think we can mistake that with almost like you know everything's for me remember like when coven first started and for some reason everybody thought their butts were going to blow up, you know, so there was like no toilet paper
549
01:00:30,320 --> 01:00:34,320
you know like that was just hoarding that was for self.
550
01:00:34,320 --> 01:00:40,320
You know, but I want to live, because it's going to make me feel amazing.
551
01:00:40,320 --> 01:00:47,320
But again, it like it's that high vibration life that will expand outward.
552
01:00:47,320 --> 01:00:55,320
Yeah, I've been thinking of it more and more like we kind of talked about this last week.
553
01:00:55,320 --> 01:01:06,320
Spirit or source or whatever it is, wants to be expressed through me in my work in my art in my hobbies and my marriage.
554
01:01:06,320 --> 01:01:14,320
And the only way it can do that is if I'm really healthy and debt and boundaryed up and dedicated to being me.
555
01:01:14,320 --> 01:01:23,320
So it's not selfish because I'm not doing it for me really. I'm doing it so that there's more God in the world.
556
01:01:23,320 --> 01:01:41,320
And like thinking about that has made it easier for me particularly as I'm wrestling social media and how I want to show up and wrestling, accepting people loving me or liking me, right.
557
01:01:41,320 --> 01:01:54,320
And then flipping the narrative a little bit and going like, oh, that's not necessarily me they're liking its source or God, its presence that they're feeling and seeing.
558
01:01:54,320 --> 01:02:07,320
And that made that piece of it a little bit easier too so I've sort of been thinking about that like asking myself, how can I become as clear or transparent as possible.
559
01:02:07,320 --> 01:02:15,320
So that this thing whatever it is can shine through me more.
560
01:02:15,320 --> 01:02:23,320
Yeah, I struggle with that, just because of what I've learned about pride growing up.
561
01:02:23,320 --> 01:02:33,320
And I was thinking about this last night like I don't think I fully understand what is pride and what is the bad pride versus what is the good pride, you know,
562
01:02:33,320 --> 01:02:39,320
because I want to be good because it makes me feel amazing.
563
01:02:39,320 --> 01:02:46,320
So that's about self but it's also helpful externally.
564
01:02:46,320 --> 01:02:53,320
It can diffuse a situation like if somebody cuts me off and gives me the finger instead of me ran in my car into him.
565
01:02:53,320 --> 01:03:02,320
You know, I laugh and it's gone, you know, and then I'm not at the next the next person that I get frustrated with or something.
566
01:03:02,320 --> 01:03:09,320
I'm not going off on them and becoming that very person, you know, that did it to me.
567
01:03:09,320 --> 01:03:18,320
So, so is that bad or good that that makes me feel amazing because because that that the old part of my brain is like well that's bad that's pride it's for self.
568
01:03:18,320 --> 01:03:21,320
So you're you're evil.
569
01:03:21,320 --> 01:03:28,320
Right, so you're probably purposely keeping yourself from feeling good about yourself because.
570
01:03:28,320 --> 01:03:30,320
Yeah, can't.
571
01:03:30,320 --> 01:03:31,320
Right.
572
01:03:31,320 --> 01:03:43,320
And I never knew I mean, it goes deep like I can't feel good about myself, you know, I placed in the top five and a national writing competition.
573
01:03:43,320 --> 01:03:48,320
If you ask me like what do I think I can write now I suck.
574
01:03:48,320 --> 01:03:58,320
You know, like, so even even with proof of talent that or work or whatever.
575
01:03:58,320 --> 01:04:07,320
I suck. I have to think that because if I think I'm good at anything, even something that I practice constantly.
576
01:04:07,320 --> 01:04:13,320
If I get good I can't say I'm good, because then that's pride and it's evil.
577
01:04:13,320 --> 01:04:20,320
What would you like to believe about pride.
578
01:04:20,320 --> 01:04:23,320
That that the.
579
01:04:23,320 --> 01:04:27,320
There's a paradox that that comes with selfishness.
580
01:04:27,320 --> 01:04:37,320
There's there's the good self and there's the bad self you know the the need to hoard that that's bad the need to think that I'm the greatest.
581
01:04:37,320 --> 01:04:54,320
That's that's that's bad what I would like to think about pride is that it's it's a very healthy confidence building. I mean both physically and mentally healthy thing to do to recognize.
582
01:04:54,320 --> 01:04:57,320
The good stuff that we do.
583
01:04:57,320 --> 01:05:01,320
Just as easily as we recognize all the bad stuff that we do.
584
01:05:01,320 --> 01:05:05,320
So that I can say, you know, I wrote something it was it was pretty damn good.
585
01:05:05,320 --> 01:05:11,320
I like that. Not I'm the greatest in the world, you know, or.
586
01:05:11,320 --> 01:05:15,320
But just that was good.
587
01:05:15,320 --> 01:05:17,320
Yeah.
588
01:05:17,320 --> 01:05:32,320
Yeah, I'm wondering if maybe it kind of has to do with what we were talking about the two different parts of your brain is when pride exists more in the reptile brain it's comparative and really what it is is fear.
589
01:05:32,320 --> 01:05:34,320
Right.
590
01:05:34,320 --> 01:05:42,320
I have to be better than you I have to build a big wall of, you know, I'm the best, which is very.
591
01:05:42,320 --> 01:05:44,320
It shuts people out.
592
01:05:44,320 --> 01:05:52,320
Yeah, it's more pride of like the thinking brain, which is like, I'm good and bad. I'm just good. I just know I feel wonderful.
593
01:05:52,320 --> 01:06:05,320
Right. More up here, or maybe it's the heart and the brain like however you think about things but it does seem like there's two different experiences of pride and we're calling it the same word which is really confusing.
594
01:06:05,320 --> 01:06:09,320
Going back to your word thing right like we need to.
595
01:06:09,320 --> 01:06:20,320
To that that is like genius to me like the intention behind the word you know so it's it's like when pride comes from fear.
596
01:06:20,320 --> 01:06:26,320
That's why you're going to hoard toilet paper or or whatever it is you know.
597
01:06:26,320 --> 01:06:33,320
Or tell gay people they can't be married or they can't do it right because you're trying to control all of this it's.
598
01:06:33,320 --> 01:06:37,320
Yeah, I'm better than you I know how you should live right.
599
01:06:37,320 --> 01:06:49,320
Yeah, but when it comes from that that humble place like I am I am good and bad but you know that that came out pretty cool. I'm proud of that.
600
01:06:49,320 --> 01:07:06,320
Like that. Wow, that's pretty cool man I've never thought of it like that like that that pride that stems from a fear of somebody tells me like I'm not as good as I think I have to go off on them and call and rip them down and stuff you know because it's.
601
01:07:06,320 --> 01:07:15,320
It's puts a crack in that belief system. If I'm not perfect if I'm not the greatest and I'm nothing.
602
01:07:15,320 --> 01:07:17,320
Yeah.
603
01:07:17,320 --> 01:07:35,320
I think that might be a fun practice, you know I know the last couple weeks we've been thinking about life is art and I think that's been a good practice but it might be fun for the next week to think about pride a little bit and like how can I feel you know come back to
604
01:07:35,320 --> 01:07:51,320
the next week and tell our listeners and they can do it too like what am I proud of that I did this week like when did I allow myself to experience pride in the good sense.
605
01:07:51,320 --> 01:07:54,320
Yeah, yeah what that what that feeling is.
606
01:07:54,320 --> 01:08:02,320
That's what I mean, because to me and to me it feels like self acknowledgement.
607
01:08:02,320 --> 01:08:07,320
Yeah, it has a soft sense to me like a soft feel to me.
608
01:08:07,320 --> 01:08:17,320
You know, like, like, like last night I had the air condition rockin and just the quilt and everything I was so freaking comfortable man like that feeling.
609
01:08:17,320 --> 01:08:18,320
Yes.
610
01:08:18,320 --> 01:08:31,320
You know, whereas the other version of like I am so good. And for me I can only relate it back to that was how I felt as a Christian.
611
01:08:31,320 --> 01:08:36,320
And I have the truth. I am better.
612
01:08:36,320 --> 01:08:50,320
Even though I would say all the right things you know like, you know, Jesus died for us all and stuff but again, then yelling about how people are going to hell because they're so wicked, you know that that just creates an other and it puts me above that.
613
01:08:50,320 --> 01:08:54,320
Yeah, and it never felt good.
614
01:08:54,320 --> 01:09:19,320
I think you're right. I think that my experience of pride in the past has been around Christianity around my looks, but you know the opposite of conceit is doubt right so I might have gone into parties or situations and thought like I'm the prettiest person here, but that's not really what I believed about
615
01:09:19,320 --> 01:09:20,320
myself.
616
01:09:20,320 --> 01:09:21,320
Right.
617
01:09:21,320 --> 01:09:23,320
Yeah.
618
01:09:23,320 --> 01:09:35,320
But it came up in that. And then, you know, like we've talked about like arguing and wanting to be right and prove people wrong. I had a lot of that going on a lot in my younger years.
619
01:09:35,320 --> 01:09:50,320
But yeah now when I feel healthy pride, it feels like floating down a river, right it feels soft it feels hard to flow it feels open like oh I reached full expansion yay.
620
01:09:50,320 --> 01:09:52,320
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
621
01:09:52,320 --> 01:09:59,320
Yeah, I don't really know how to describe it yet either but it'd be fun to keep the fairness around it for the week.
622
01:09:59,320 --> 01:10:07,320
Yeah, I'm definitely going to do that because even when you were describing that like going into a party like and thinking something about yourself that you really didn't believe about yourself.
623
01:10:07,320 --> 01:10:14,320
So it was almost like you want everybody else to think that you're the prettiest one there.
624
01:10:14,320 --> 01:10:15,320
Right.
625
01:10:15,320 --> 01:10:22,320
And in a way pride is about like that validation. You don't believe it yourself.
626
01:10:22,320 --> 01:10:24,320
Yes.
627
01:10:24,320 --> 01:10:26,320
Wow, that's pretty cool man.
628
01:10:26,320 --> 01:10:32,320
Right but but pride from the heart or this other thing we're talking about does not need validation.
629
01:10:32,320 --> 01:10:33,320
Right.
630
01:10:33,320 --> 01:10:40,320
They're like that's just looking cool I did it I love it like you're all filled up with self it doesn't matter what anybody else thinks at all.
631
01:10:40,320 --> 01:10:42,320
Yeah.
632
01:10:42,320 --> 01:10:55,320
Like I remember like my favorite pool shot ever made the I was playing nine balls so you got to go in order 123 all the way up to nine right and the girl was playing made this amazing shop.
633
01:10:55,320 --> 01:11:01,320
And so the cue ball was up table. The one ball was like right by the side pocket.
634
01:11:01,320 --> 01:11:07,320
And there was another ball blocking me I could not get to it so I had to bank it.
635
01:11:07,320 --> 01:11:22,320
So I hit the cue ball down table with a little bit of spin on it went on this side of the two ball came out on the other side of the two ball went up and just knocked the one and it went in right now.
636
01:11:22,320 --> 01:11:25,320
It's what I intended.
637
01:11:25,320 --> 01:11:30,320
Everything just lined up for me because I would not be able to do that shot again if my life depended on it.
638
01:11:30,320 --> 01:11:38,320
But I started laughing I was like that was such an awesome shot you know so I was like proud of that shot but not.
639
01:11:38,320 --> 01:11:42,320
It didn't mean that I was the greatest pool player in the world.
640
01:11:42,320 --> 01:11:48,320
And nobody could have taken that feeling away from you even if somebody was like no your shot was stupid.
641
01:11:48,320 --> 01:11:49,320
Oh yeah.
642
01:11:49,320 --> 01:11:51,320
You felt it.
643
01:11:51,320 --> 01:12:02,320
Yeah. Yeah. You my friends were like I was like dude you got so lucky and I'm like yeah but it was it was still cool man like it was really good. Yeah so they can't diminish it.
644
01:12:02,320 --> 01:12:06,320
That's that's really interesting. That's going to be a pretty good exploration man.
645
01:12:06,320 --> 01:12:18,320
Yeah it feels to me kind of like you know when you celebrate a tree or a flower or right like celebrating yourself is just another piece of creation.
646
01:12:18,320 --> 01:12:22,320
That sometimes gets it really right.
647
01:12:22,320 --> 01:12:23,320
Yeah.
648
01:12:23,320 --> 01:12:29,320
It's like sometimes the flower blooms perfectly or you get the best blueberry right.
649
01:12:29,320 --> 01:12:31,320
Yeah.
650
01:12:31,320 --> 01:12:34,320
Why I wonder why that like why.
651
01:12:34,320 --> 01:12:42,320
Why do we like is it acceptable to celebrate everything and everyone except ourselves.
652
01:12:42,320 --> 01:12:43,320
Yeah.
653
01:12:43,320 --> 01:12:56,320
I mean the odds of us just being alive are like one in a trillion there's more people there's more possible people that could be alive that won't be that will ever be alive in all of human history.
654
01:12:56,320 --> 01:13:01,320
But we don't celebrate ourselves we just we tear ourselves down.
655
01:13:01,320 --> 01:13:02,320
Yeah.
656
01:13:02,320 --> 01:13:12,320
And I think part of that is like we talked about the negativity bias and evolution and where we're at in that stage and part of it is that
657
01:13:12,320 --> 01:13:25,320
we're very powerful to celebrate yourself and our society hasn't in my opinion wanted us to have access to that kind of power.
658
01:13:25,320 --> 01:13:38,320
They want us to have the other kind right where oh I bought a new car and I have a house and I have all this stuff so I must be better than everybody else because I am good at capitalism.
659
01:13:38,320 --> 01:13:44,320
And I'm good at doing the same routine thing every day of my life.
660
01:13:44,320 --> 01:13:55,320
You know for 40 something years so that I can then retire at 65 or 70 and then start living you know then start doing stuff I want to do.
661
01:13:55,320 --> 01:13:56,320
Yeah.
662
01:13:56,320 --> 01:14:07,320
I love that story about the fisherman and the guy comes up and says what are you doing sitting on the beach like you could catch more fish and he says well why would I want to catch more fish.
663
01:14:07,320 --> 01:14:19,320
And he says well so that you have like a stockpile and you don't have to work in the future and he's like I'm not working right now I'm like sitting on the beach what are you talking like literally what you're planning is what I'm doing right.
664
01:14:19,320 --> 01:14:28,320
It's written better than that but that's the point right the now is all you have so enjoy it.
665
01:14:28,320 --> 01:14:37,320
And that's what I mean that's what we evolved that's how we've lived the majority of human of human existence.
666
01:14:37,320 --> 01:14:50,320
You know hunter gathers worked on average about four hours a day and then the rest of the time was socialization maintenance like I mean just living and just experiencing life.
667
01:14:50,320 --> 01:14:54,320
But it's all reversed now.
668
01:14:54,320 --> 01:15:06,320
Yeah some places are starting to you know make a four day work week but you still get paid them starting to ease off of that idea because the truth is with technology.
669
01:15:06,320 --> 01:15:11,320
Everybody doesn't need to work 40 hours to afford food in a home.
670
01:15:11,320 --> 01:15:21,320
So it's changing that mindset about what is human worth and is it what you do for a living.
671
01:15:21,320 --> 01:15:23,320
Right.
672
01:15:23,320 --> 01:15:25,320
Yeah.
673
01:15:25,320 --> 01:15:29,320
All right I like that homework assignment for the week so we're going to think about pride.
674
01:15:29,320 --> 01:15:31,320
And sounds good.
675
01:15:31,320 --> 01:15:34,320
Yeah.
676
01:15:34,320 --> 01:15:39,320
All right thank you everybody for joining us I'm turning off the recording.
677
01:15:39,320 --> 01:15:43,320
Thank you so much for joining us.
678
01:15:43,320 --> 01:15:48,320
We are so grateful for all of our listeners.
679
01:15:48,320 --> 01:15:55,320
Please support us in doing what we love it's as simple as hitting that like or subscribe button.
680
01:15:55,320 --> 01:15:57,320
It would really mean a lot to us.
681
01:15:57,320 --> 01:16:19,320
Thanks guys and we'll see you next week.