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On this week's episode, I have mishit Shaw founder of thought labs and co-founder of the global NLP conference, India.
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And someone I've worked with in training people, how to become aware of their own minds source code.
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And the structure of our human experience.
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Taking people beyond their comfort zones at retreats in the Swiss outs and the Indian Himalayas and elsewhere around the world.
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This conversation is all about dealing with unexpected events in life.
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Like the very present COVID strain in June, 2021 and lockdowns in India where initiate is based.
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And also in his own career, which didn't go as he expected, it would.
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There is a lot of principles around ways of thinking in this conversation about career change and life change.
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And I hope you gain as much wisdom around how to think as I did from this.
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The full show notes and videos of other interviews are available@burnfromwithin.com full session interviews.
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So listen all the way through.
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And enjoy I'm really excited to.
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Share your story and some of the kind of structure around your thinking today and in particular right now you're in India and, there is a, obviously a global pandemic, but it's particularly the Indian strain of the viruses.
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Everyone's been seeing it around the world on the news, and it's particularly tough in India in the communities there.
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Before we get into like in, into depth about your life what, how have you found this experience?
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Living in India?
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Yourself and, the people that you know, and I guess what lessons have you learned in your own life, from this experience that you might be able to take from this going out of the country?
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Yeah, it's been difficult for short.
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Specifically because I didn't know this happened because I was on a, in the mountains on an expedition.
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And so I was up, and we didn't have network with the beads, then it was challenging.
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But when I did go to the mountains in India, there was nothing.
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We had 3000 cases a day and this was a big country with this population.
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They don't need was nothing.
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And when I came back after three weeks and fished on the phone, the first thing that I saw lost that, that to the powers that don't do 400,000 in just the amount of the weeks.
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And then I began to make more happen.
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How did it all of a sudden mean it almost been like hell break, broken, loose.
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And my expedience in the mountain was that I was looking forward to coming back because we had really difficult time in the market because of snow storm.
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And I was really looking forward to coming back home and duty, just, getting a massage and then going to the spa and all of that.
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But I'm new to the game back in the lockdown and everything was shut.
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And so I started, like I was moving from one challenge to another challenge, but maybe having a pretty built, it was like just moving from one to another.
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And.
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That was particularly challenging because one, I didn't see it coming and I wasn't expecting it.
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And it's just something that happened.
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And the biggest lesson that I couldn't learn from this was acceptance.
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That was just mentioning nothing I would do all day.
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Initially I did feel frustrated because I couldn't help people.
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I couldn't do it.
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Got it.
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Going a bit sad, even looking at the news and who shouldn't be here.
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Of course.
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Every now and then I would heal that someone's off the way in someone's come onsite.
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And he just and I couldn't do anything to as possible door and it was just frustrating.
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The most important thing that came out of this was just acceptance that all I can extent this and.
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What are some of the things that are in my control that I can be attention to and focus on that.
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So we started doing some support sessions for people, and so on the paying attention to my the things that I can control and things that I can pay attention to.
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And that accept that this is what it is.
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Then we can just do the best to shift it and change it.
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Great lessons to be learned and your master trainer of NLP and very aware of the structure of your experience and what's going on and to attuned to recognizing that pattern of acceptance in, in this moment right now during COVID in India A number of years ago, before you even started learning NLP you got offered a place at NASA the space agency and unfortunately due to some personal challenges, you weren't able to.
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Take up that career.
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And as you talk about acceptance now and with this kind of clarity of thought and being aware of structure of your experience through, through neuro-linguistic programming back then, you didn't have that awareness, that definitely not that training.
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How did you deal with.
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I guess that career that was offered you almost been being taken away.
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And how did you respond?
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And I guess a follow-up to that is if you were in that same situation now, what would you do different?
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So in that moment as possible, just to give the context of this internship in Nagasaki provoke, the project that I've worked on and yeah.
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That was one of the biggest terror giant for me to live my mind at that point due to either become astronauts on tribute to the space exploration.
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That's what gives to what I read.
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We want to become astronaut.
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And I generally bless you that and look towards that and just couldn't get that at that point.
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I definitely didn't know the structure of acceptance at that point was angry.
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And I was frustrated because it's something I could have done.
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It's something that wants that for me to do it and I couldn't do it.
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And that was really difficult and frustrating So I didn't super closely with engineering, but it took me a couple of years to really deal with it.
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Good that by that time I lost interest in engineering.
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Cause in my mind, like the booklets to do engineering loss to become an astronaut.
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And if I can't be an astronaut, then what's the book was of doing engineering anymore.
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And so my interest in engineering was completely lost and and yeah, took, we do the year barely focus on that.
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Really can get ordered.
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If I, if you ask me, what would I do now?
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Going back to the same situation.
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I think it's learning this acceptance that we need to be heads to really accept it and to be able to focus on, because the thing that I've learned in life is that there's just not one vision.
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That'd be habitus humans.
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If you dig deep, then I'm sure that all of us have one to position my different experiences and things that you're passionate about.
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That's something I didn't know then, but I know now the cost, as much as I ended up being astronaut, it wasn't anything in the more, and it was only thing in the world at that time.
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But right.
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It wasn't that I learned that I could build a new vision.
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I could follow something else, then I'm interested in something else that I'm passionate about.
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And again, at that time, I love and share what that was.
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But as I explored and I continue exploring, and I was lucky because I kind of John step on this youth organization and they used to work with professional concentration.
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And I found my new calling in our form when new passion and.
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If I were to go back to that situation, now I'll remember this, that there's just more than one thing in life.
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There can be multiple things that I can focus on.
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Yeah, I very much resonate with that.
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I did some training in the last few months with Stanford university professors called designing your life is around design thinking.
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And one of the concepts they talk about in life design and career design is what's called Odyssey planning and it's a simple exercise.
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I can share it in the show notes, but it basically.
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You project your life over the next five years and plan what you want to do for the next five years.
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And you write down, you want to do this year to open a restaurant and year three or grow it.
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And, you'll become the next subway, but tastier and that kind of stuff.
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And But then you do that entire exercise for one set five years, but then you do it again for a new five years and then you do it one more time and what it does is it opens up choice that sometimes life.
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Gets in the way.
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And there's things that are out of your control that happened, and you do have alternatives and, there are many paths to fulfillment, happiness, joy passion purpose and you can plan for it as well.
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If you really are consciously aware of what you want and what you want to contribute to the world, and then you can do that.
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And so with With choice and this kind of realization of choice, you realizing that was a passion that you had it's an interesting, and you have an unusual career path compared to a lot of people that, go to college, Then they go into their nine to five.
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Often corporate roles and do that career you chose a, what seemed like it seems like a passion in NLP.
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How did you decide for that to be your career and, did it suddenly become a passion or was it through practice?
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Like how did you know that, that was your passion and why did you go after it as a career?
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Cause it's quite, I would say that's a risk is an unusual not safe choice.
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Yeah, I think the biggest city, then I ran doctor and it'd be POS wave.
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It goes up the expedience with NASA because I was so angry and frustrated.
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And and I think the frustration came from the fact that, most people just dream about it and I had it and I couldn't get it.
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And I couldn't get away with it.
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I couldn't really begin all the way to get her with it.
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And then like always with some of these things that happen, someone came to me and say, Hey, you know what?
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You should go and do NRB.
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And that would really help you.
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And so I went and did my an OB equals your environment.
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And it didn't really make a lot of sense and it didn't really help me.
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It was quite a profound experience that I had.
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A lot of things didn't make sense in the bus time that I did it took me a while to get used to it, but I did know that there was something in this and more than that, I really like the idea of exploring human potential.
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I think that's part of the structure of the way I create vision.
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Most of my goals and like becoming an astronaut is.
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Pushing human would ensure going to places that are as humanity we haven't gone before.
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And that was how I had created my vision currently, because I couldn't become and big, the next best thing is to find evidence.
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And I think that also comes from the place of the daily pushing my my limits and human potential.
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And so I think the general, my vision creation is.
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Under the underlying don't have it.
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Is that, how can I do any Bush?
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My human Mike would ensure them, how can I really, one of my comfort zone and and I think doing an, it would be gave me that expedience.
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And, but it also gave me the structured.
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It gives me the step by step process of me hoping others do the same.
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And I think that was really exciting for me.
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That was really fascinating to be able to do that.
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But other than that, all of those to really explore that their mind and the limits.
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And I I also do allow use that.
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As humans that I teach, I put a human stool to then do more towards experiences rather than things because when I wanted to become astronaut it wasn't just to be astronauts, but that experience that I would get to really look at the planet from a different view, that was expedient, that I was grateful same that I want to find Everest.
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My experience is to be able to see the load and be in that adventure.
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And I experience that thrill and that's what I'm looking for.
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And it's the same sort of experience that I got from working with people that thrilled to be able to see someone really reach the maximum.
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And so I started being attention to the experience.
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What's the thought of experience I want to have in life.
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And I knew that engineering and science was that because.
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That's not, I wasn't interested in that anymore.
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And so that's why I decided to drop out in the fourth year of my college.
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I didn't do any bench engineering after and started focusing more on human behavior and LPN.
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Yeah.
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It's interesting.
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You became aware of an experience that you liked and you basically said, I want to see more of this.
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I this is something that, that lights me up.
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This is something that inspires me, energizes me, all of that kind of stuff.
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What would you say to people that are trying to find an experience?
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The, that does light them up.
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Like how do you think they could find that
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in life my fundamental belief is that people already have this to the context of binding presupposes that they don't have it.
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And I think I've believed that they already have it.
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And so to me level it just, they're just disconnected with these experiences of, it's not a mental illness.
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So the, of the question then I would ask, is there, how do we really bring that to awareness that they already have for me?
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I think looking at some of the moments and the school components is that we have those defining moments, that the moment that really make you feel alive clearly you've got.
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Deputy kind of charges you up.
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And these are the moments where you know that, you can't you can't sleep, you wake up in the morning, get out of the bed.
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And this is the thing that you want to do the posting and not really the janitors and people get caught up in their tasks.
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But it's not about the dots.
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It's not about what you're doing, or it's not about the things that you do, but when you do this task, what's the experience that you have.
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What are the emotions that you're feeling.
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And you wouldn't know that because that's why you were doing those tasks.
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Once you realize that, okay.
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When I've been alive, these are the emotions that I feel.
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These are the experiences that I have and the things that strikes me that you're passionate about, then that's when you can start being more attention to them.
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What are some of the, then things that you can do, what career that you can burn that gives you those experiences.
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And it just something that would be one thing.
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Cause that's something, another thing that people tend to get caught up that when I do this, I'll get this expedient.
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And that's the only thing that will give me this experience.
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And I start to like video like that.
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There are choices and there are so many ways that you can build a career to have that experience more than life.
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I love that.
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Absolutely love that.
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And there's various people that have talked about looking at defining moments reading, start with why and find your why by Simon Sinek.
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He, in order to find your purpose in what, what you're here on this earth for your why statement, he calls it.
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Looking back to moments in your life that are both that significant, and that could be positive or that could be negative, you know it, but it's something that means something to you that draws emotion and sparks life from you.
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Looking at those moments and actually, what are the lessons from that?
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And that's actually part of the beauty of learning NLP is being able to explore those kind of moments and actually get a structure that that can be translated into other contexts in your future career and how you make decisions in the future.
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And it's really great that you actually started talking about defining moments.
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I, now I know just before we started recording, you said you had a conversation with another great NLP master G Natalie about defining moments.
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Can you talk a little bit about, and I love talking about structure and how people can use structure to help them in their lives and careers.
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But I also really enjoy sometimes diving into the content and the context around it to share other people's stories.
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So people really get these Techniques and principles unconsciously.
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Tell me a little bit about some of your defining moments, whether that's what you've already shared with your conversation with Jean or even outside.
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I think one of the biggest defining moment is what we just spoke about in Don Shaw, realizing.
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Just going through the challenge itself, there was so much counting for me.
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I seemed to think that if I didn't have that challenge, then I would be in a completely different place.
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But one of, one of the things that Jean and I also explored was this idea that a lot of defining moments come from saying yes to stepping into unknown.
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So you have this sense of vision.
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But then say yes to stepping into unknown and then opportunities are in genes, thought to is automatically emerge.
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And I think one of those, one of those moment, definitely for me most to stop thinking about.
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So when I started doing NLP, I really enjoyed it.
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And I was the lucky one because I felt I'm doing the thing that I really want to do, and I want to be able to do in my life.
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And yet it felt incongruent.
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It felt like there's something, there was something missing and lots of things that I do.
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And I suppose that as I spend more and more time doing training or spending a lot of time in the hotel who said in the session and that's that severely not the kind I ended imagine I would like to spend my time.
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And I do really love spending time in the nature and in the mountains.
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And that's what I want you to spend more time.
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And that's where one of my defining moments also came because I suddenly went blank.
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You know what?
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I always had this amazing experience.
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When I go on finding an expedition.
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And learned so much and what if I could replicate the same experience for people?
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And when I first heard about it was like, it was one of the craziest idea.
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I don't even know how it's going to look or what's going to work.
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I even thought that, I might just be going crazy by thinking about something that, you know, what if I could do be in No, one's done this before.
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No one ever thought about this before, and I just want that I was going to with him.
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But that is what we spoke about.
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And I still that's the life I wanted to live.
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And that's how I wanted to spend more of my time.
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That's where I barely congruent.
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And And that's what I barely confluent and I.
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I started doing an, a B, and as being the Hemanez.
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And the first time I did that, it was such an exception and expedience, and that was a woman to have a revelation that, I can almost call up my passions together to move towards the life that I want to build.
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And mountaineering is one thing, and then it'll be is another thing.
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How can I bring that together and make it one and create that oneness within me.
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So that I can continue to move towards the life that I want to be.
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And that, that will step in and be one of the biggest defining momentum to be able to stop that and then lift that.
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And I've been doing that consistently and it's been such a great experience.
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Yeah.
00:19:14.940 --> 00:19:24.582
The book that comes to mind when you talk about that, and I think this is some, a book that Jean recommended to read was a bit, I think it's called build the bridge as you walk on it.
00:19:24.582 --> 00:19:25.241
Is that correct?
00:19:27.132 --> 00:19:30.872
Cause you will I can't remember the author's name, but that concept of.
00:19:31.083 --> 00:19:32.432
Going into the unknown.
00:19:32.522 --> 00:19:43.556
And but that's really taking up the challenge because a lot of the time in life that that gives you those defining moments and you remembered them and the, and it sparks emotions and it challenges you in it.
00:19:44.486 --> 00:19:54.316
You talked earlier about, exploring human potential and, going into those moments actually draws out like more of the human potential that, that you never knew existed.
00:19:54.298 --> 00:19:57.102
And there's definitely moments in my life where I've.
00:19:58.041 --> 00:20:06.480
Either I've been thrown into it, into the deep end, so to speak and had to build a bridge or I've chosen to as well.
00:20:06.509 --> 00:20:16.215
And and definitely I, when I think about defining moments is always those moments where I've been challenged or I've set myself a challenge that I didn't think I could do.
00:20:16.297 --> 00:20:21.038
And the, my, my reserves of potentiality somehow come up.
00:20:21.232 --> 00:20:21.893
Every time.
00:20:21.942 --> 00:20:25.138
And and it's so interesting, you talking about.
00:20:25.390 --> 00:20:31.653
Combining your passions to build this bridge of a business, to build this career that you're doing.
00:20:31.682 --> 00:20:41.147
And there's so many people that probably listening that might not necessarily be happy with their career, or they might be happy with certain elements of it.
00:20:41.147 --> 00:20:47.928
And perhaps they want to combine those elements with other skills, maybe other careers they've had maybe.
00:20:48.383 --> 00:20:54.365
Maybe passions may be interests maybe just new areas that they wanted to explore in their life.
00:20:54.425 --> 00:21:08.566
As a potential career, how do you get the courage, first of all to try out these new things, like these different things that other people haven't done before running retreats in the Himalayan mountains which no one else was actually doing.
00:21:08.622 --> 00:21:11.592
Certainly not in kind of personal development and LP world.
00:21:11.862 --> 00:21:14.685
Like how do you get the courage and bravery to do that?
00:21:15.016 --> 00:21:20.679
And like if someone else was thinking to do a similar thing, where could they start.
00:21:20.890 --> 00:21:21.549
Just do it.
00:21:21.576 --> 00:21:23.659
But of course that's easier said than done.
00:21:24.709 --> 00:21:29.654
So I guess if by victory, look at my experience.
00:21:30.805 --> 00:21:36.714
When I started, I didn't generally sat down thinking that this is my fault, and this is the only thing that I was going to do.
00:21:36.714 --> 00:21:37.765
And this is my video.
00:21:38.575 --> 00:21:43.674
My first log, that was a treat was then let me see, let me build it.
00:21:44.065 --> 00:21:45.991
Let me see what happens.
00:21:46.002 --> 00:21:49.782
And then I, they could, I think it from them and I only paid attention to that.
00:21:49.782 --> 00:21:55.528
I didn't really pay attention to thinking about it as as the career or the ring or the bot or.
00:21:56.143 --> 00:22:04.943
It's like that very famous quote from Peter dreams, that you build it and they will come to that, that I wanted to just buried it and do my part.
00:22:04.923 --> 00:22:13.217
But they speed and it's designed to build from a design might've lead betas of event site and put it out there and see if they come.
00:22:13.757 --> 00:22:15.257
And if they don't it's okay.
00:22:15.257 --> 00:22:19.295
I know that, it doesn't work, but if they don't, I know that I learn from it and do something else.
00:22:19.376 --> 00:22:27.903
But I just wanted to put it out there and I think that's how so that's how I see in dome something more or less that I stopped devil.
00:22:27.913 --> 00:22:29.804
I have no strings attached to it.
00:22:29.804 --> 00:22:32.953
I didn't have to, I didn't put any financial pressure or anything.
00:22:33.433 --> 00:22:34.723
I just wanted to go that.
00:22:34.723 --> 00:22:34.993
Okay.
00:22:35.203 --> 00:22:37.513
That's just not that there and see what happened.
00:22:38.114 --> 00:22:41.503
And more often than not from my experience, it has happened.
00:22:41.594 --> 00:22:44.022
It's just the metaphor that comes to mind is skydiving.
00:22:44.002 --> 00:22:59.181
When you skydive you're literally jumping out of an airplane, but you know that the parachute will open and it's like just taking a jump into it and trusting that the parachute will open and more often than not, it does open.
00:22:59.163 --> 00:23:02.971
And I guess that's how I started with Monash.
00:23:03.862 --> 00:23:04.402
Yeah.
00:23:04.406 --> 00:23:08.376
There's this element of prototyping, obviously, do it, just do it.
00:23:08.428 --> 00:23:13.998
But there's also an element of, okay, you don't have to, give up your entire life to go for this.
00:23:14.090 --> 00:23:19.349
You can do, th there isn't any we can test this out and you can learn from, and you can start small and you can.
00:23:19.349 --> 00:23:19.410
Yeah.
00:23:19.398 --> 00:23:26.538
So in the case of Careers, for example, it might be that you're thinking about a career in the charity sector.
00:23:26.538 --> 00:23:35.147
And so you work in a charity shop while you're at the weekends one day a week while you're working or your job weekdays and.
00:23:35.492 --> 00:23:40.292
See that experience, test it out, see if it lights you up.
00:23:40.292 --> 00:23:44.073
And that really goes back to the principles of NLP.
00:23:44.140 --> 00:23:49.145
One of the models in NLP is it's tote, test operate, test exit.
00:23:49.269 --> 00:23:50.470
It's all about testing.
00:23:50.470 --> 00:24:03.939
It's about finding out how your experiences, when you jump into these things that you think you have a hypothesis for are going to be exciting, passionate, something of your dreams, something you wanted to try out.
00:24:03.919 --> 00:24:15.180
So this idea of just jumping in, I think even at a small scale and testing things out and learning from it is so important not just for your career, but for your life or whatever you want to do.
00:24:15.210 --> 00:24:21.893
And then going back to the, what you said earlier Being aware of how you experienced that new thing that you're testing out.
00:24:21.893 --> 00:24:24.803
And there might be a, oh gosh, I shouldn't have done that.
00:24:24.836 --> 00:24:31.586
In which case you've learned from it, but it also might be a defining moment which could pivot your entire life.
00:24:31.582 --> 00:24:44.712
So interesting that, sharing that structure with me in terms of in congruence and I guess another way to describe it is internal misalignment of what you're doing in your life.
00:24:44.701 --> 00:24:50.508
And you can see it with people who are and this includes me as well.
00:24:50.506 --> 00:24:52.938
Many times in my life who are.
00:24:53.663 --> 00:25:07.814
Unconsciously, you can see they're a little bit, maybe slouched over, or you could just see in their facial expressions when they're talking about a certain thing or project or job or a person or whatever, but that they're saying one thing, but.
00:25:08.328 --> 00:25:10.159
Unconsciously, they don't mean it.
00:25:10.255 --> 00:25:15.055
And all they're doing something, but they don't necessarily, it's not in their heart.
00:25:15.085 --> 00:25:22.582
It's not something that aligns with them, with their values, with what they might unconsciously consider that their purpose of meaning in life.
00:25:22.612 --> 00:25:24.531
In terms of income group.
00:25:25.461 --> 00:25:40.491
What are some things that people can do now if they feel that in congruent in their job, in their life are there certain steps that they can take right now to start finding a path to congruence and really fitting happier?
00:25:40.971 --> 00:25:41.632
Yeah.
00:25:41.672 --> 00:25:47.688
Coming from an IRB, that the first question that I would ask to people is that what is it that they want to do?
00:25:48.678 --> 00:25:51.798
Because I think it's, you're really important.
00:25:52.157 --> 00:25:56.897
And it's what we said that saying yes to the unknown, committing to the unknown.
00:25:56.894 --> 00:25:58.076
It's this into the structure.
00:25:58.165 --> 00:26:02.836
It's really important that first to say yes to congruence and move towards.
00:26:02.897 --> 00:26:04.816
Move towards congruence.
00:26:04.928 --> 00:26:12.329
And again, to start really thinking about a lot of the elements that we spoke about start with being as some of the defining moments of your own life.
00:26:12.900 --> 00:26:24.693
And then that gives you a sense of what are the kinds of experiences that you want to have one and mode in life, and did this expedience as usually relates to emotions that you want even more than.
00:26:26.409 --> 00:26:32.138
So I want to view more adventures and I want to feed them all happy around a people who's putting on a few pretty.
00:26:32.125 --> 00:26:36.231
And so what have some of those emotions that you want to expedience motor mode in life?
00:26:36.321 --> 00:26:41.511
Also, maybe it's important to pay attention to what are some of the emotions that you wanna move away from?
00:26:41.549 --> 00:26:45.106
So much invites and that's an important aspect to pay attention to the cost.
00:26:45.166 --> 00:26:51.106
Often when people are stuck in a video art that they don't enjoy the expedience of emotion that they do in fact.
00:26:51.767 --> 00:26:57.609
And so to know that these are the emotions to step away from, I don't want to, I don't want to feel a bowl of M did.
00:26:57.609 --> 00:26:58.599
I don't want to, I don't.
00:26:58.730 --> 00:27:00.339
I know that I don't want to.
00:27:00.775 --> 00:27:04.025
Be part of something that's very task oriented.
00:27:04.025 --> 00:27:06.125
That kind of gives me all of them.
00:27:06.634 --> 00:27:09.634
So knowing do want to walk away from this all the time.
00:27:10.055 --> 00:27:22.738
But once I think once you actually heard about this, then you can start looking at, okay, what are some of the things that you can do that you can that can give you more and more expedience or lines that you want to have?
00:27:22.750 --> 00:27:24.191
What are some of the critique on spike?
00:27:24.191 --> 00:27:30.520
You said it could be chatted even it could be smart step on glean, going to a charity and working for our day.
00:27:30.509 --> 00:27:42.119
If it's if it's building your own programs and retreats, then designing the smallest thing that you can possibly do and putting it out there to anything, but they didn't experiences that you want to have.
00:27:42.750 --> 00:27:46.613
What is the thing that you can do that could give you the life that you want to live.
00:27:46.792 --> 00:27:55.446
And within that, what's the smallest step that netted that is easy for you to dig, but it's also rewarding because that experience is important.
00:27:55.507 --> 00:27:58.507
And if that doesn't come, then you won't be motivated.
00:27:58.623 --> 00:28:14.191
And that's saying, taking that action and moving towards that and then doing that more and more I also, in fact, would suggest one more, a little different set up a thought experiment, because once you recognize the experience that you want to have, right.
00:28:15.361 --> 00:28:27.147
Even if you're not able to do take a step in dumps with jeans into cardio, that's it for now, even if you're not able to do that immediately, or the thing that you're going to do is at least.
00:28:27.837 --> 00:28:35.577
Being a pension to buy or six or 10 things that you can do that gives you that experience on a day-to-day basis.
00:28:35.835 --> 00:28:36.825
So what do I mean by that?
00:28:36.825 --> 00:28:44.019
For example, let's say if I want to experience more and more freedom or modern water adventure in life, artistic, one freedom in life.
00:28:44.067 --> 00:28:59.286
I know that if I build this program, that will give me freedom, but if I'm not able to build this program right now, What I can do is pay attention to what are the five things in my day-to-day life that I can do that gives me expedience of freedom and it could be as small thing as just reading a book that I really enjoy.
00:28:59.346 --> 00:29:07.726
And that gives me experience of freedom It could be it could be doing something that I really enjoy, like maybe writing or half an hour or bringing a video game.
00:29:08.175 --> 00:29:09.375
And that can give you a freedom.
00:29:09.945 --> 00:29:26.169
But the more you have it expedience a freedom that easier to get you to the video project in video, because I think what happens in at one level, the more it's like you get the base of the blood the more you experience that freedom, then it becomes an acceptable to not have that freedom.
00:29:26.828 --> 00:29:38.249
And once it becomes unacceptable to not have that freedom, then you would want to Like you would do you are Ashley that you want to have in life?
00:29:38.395 --> 00:29:51.560
yeah, that's really interesting concept of if you have a vision for what an activity or maybe a job or project that that you spend your time doing that that leads you to freedom, which might be one of your highest values.
00:29:51.625 --> 00:30:12.942
Yeah, of course you can start planning for that and it might be a big project but there are, there's a massive scale in terms of what you can do in order to experience that emotion of feeling free from, reading a book all the way to, traveling the road on a motorbike with a motorbike gang or something illegal one.
00:30:14.172 --> 00:30:14.382
Yes.
00:30:14.852 --> 00:30:30.272
And but there's also this concept of in my mind of, you're, you are already free and you already, all of these emotions Literally neurochemical things that happening in your body and the thoughts that you put to those emotions are your thoughts.
00:30:30.272 --> 00:30:31.461
And they can dissolve.
00:30:31.463 --> 00:30:38.244
If you just let go of those emotions and I re I was reading a book recently letting go by.
00:30:38.242 --> 00:30:38.991
David R.
00:30:38.991 --> 00:30:44.541
Hawkins and he talks about focusing, basically being present with whatever emotion that you have.
00:30:44.532 --> 00:30:47.613
And and just being aware of it, whether that's a painful one or.
00:30:47.595 --> 00:31:03.973
Or a positive one, like joy, for example, but just being aware of it and not being so attached to it, but just being aware of it and and actually that helps to let go of having to to, to either resist emotions or keep going towards them.
00:31:03.953 --> 00:31:13.692
And I guess I'm having a conflict because a lot of NLP is about changing your states and and finding a desired state.
00:31:14.143 --> 00:31:17.084
And some people would argue that.
00:31:17.489 --> 00:31:25.693
Actually letting go of your states and your emotions is is also another path to, to enlightenment you could call it or fulfillment.
00:31:25.769 --> 00:31:33.308
What would you say to, to that concept of letting go of emotions rather than constructing experiences to have emotions.
00:31:33.868 --> 00:31:40.674
I believe I said it, it's not an either or I think we can add I think there are places where.
00:31:41.119 --> 00:31:46.191
I would do to consciously think about expedience that I want to have and the emotions that I want to fear.
00:31:46.261 --> 00:31:51.791
And then there are places when I know that I get too attached to certain emotions and even positive emotions.
00:31:51.791 --> 00:31:54.122
Like I get attached to them and I get too attached to it.
00:31:55.261 --> 00:32:01.643
And it's important for me to let go and just be present with where I am and rather than pay attention to those emotions.
00:32:01.758 --> 00:32:04.672
So I think it's and just to pick it out and when do I need.
00:32:05.196 --> 00:32:15.689
To pay attention to what makes a lot of makes a lot of sense, because I think emotion step in Italy, give me a direction in terms of the kind of life that I want to live.
00:32:16.078 --> 00:32:16.858
Kind of go to hear it.
00:32:16.858 --> 00:32:17.548
I want to read it.
00:32:17.528 --> 00:32:25.731
But at the same time, the moment I get attached to them then based sometimes starts coming in a way because I'm just shaping them.
00:32:26.271 --> 00:32:28.971
And I think it also comes from the fundamental principle of that.
00:32:29.053 --> 00:32:38.053
Email way, like you mentioned just that, we emotions, I'm not something hooked up and it's not something that we have to chase.
00:32:38.113 --> 00:32:44.250
Like we spoke about finding, it's not something we have to find or get, do we already are there, we just have to connect with it.
00:32:44.250 --> 00:32:55.583
So in a way, operating from the place that I'm already, that person who I want to be allows me to get the sense of the kind of life that I'm going to live and expedience I want to have, and also do pay attention to the event.
00:32:55.673 --> 00:32:56.643
When do I need to let go?
00:32:56.689 --> 00:33:11.895
Because the moment I then go to nice, have a sense of my book, danger and expanded so much more because there's no, or from again, it's just, that's what we even defined it as an amended, Because there's no blockchain on me or anything, I'm just, I am.
00:33:11.986 --> 00:33:13.546
And there's no end to that statement.
00:33:13.546 --> 00:33:14.175
I just am.
00:33:14.231 --> 00:33:17.119
That's definitely, it's such an expansive space to be yet.
00:33:17.630 --> 00:33:17.990
Yeah.
00:33:18.019 --> 00:33:29.101
One thing that Springs to mind when you talk about that either letting go of emotions or actually moving towards them through experience and having actually it's about having a balance in my life.
00:33:29.131 --> 00:33:29.851
It really does.
00:33:29.888 --> 00:33:31.118
That really does make sense.
00:33:31.118 --> 00:33:37.133
It there's something that drives me to plan an experience that I know will create an emotion in me and other people.
00:33:37.133 --> 00:33:44.044
And that is a real drive to actually take, give me more motivation and Behave and take all the steps to achieve that.
00:33:44.433 --> 00:34:02.643
And then on the other side, on the other side, it can if you're not careful lead to things like addictions or just repetitive behaviors where it could go out of balance, if you're chasing those emotions too much, one, one example that Springs to mind when we were in Switzerland together and we we were doing retreat there.
00:34:02.863 --> 00:34:07.846
And there was a pub, I think it was in lauter brown burner and the lovely mountain town there.
00:34:07.946 --> 00:34:20.413
And it was the pub was famous for having lots of based on base, yeah, they walked by, they flew in these wingsuits every day and, talking to these people in the pub, it was really interesting how much.
00:34:20.398 --> 00:34:27.766
They were chasing that that feeling of exhilaration of the rush of adrenaline and, that is what made them feel alive.
00:34:27.766 --> 00:34:34.389
And actually, I'm sure there's many defining moments in their life when they are flying through the air, over a hundred miles an hour, I think.
00:34:34.449 --> 00:34:36.492
And rushing through nature.
00:34:36.561 --> 00:34:50.976
But then when you listen to it, when we both listened to their stories, there was elements of so much sacrifice, people, selling their house and, spending literally hundreds and hundreds of thousands of dollars and the relationships they'd given up and knowing so many things.
00:34:50.976 --> 00:34:55.987
Friends that died such a dangerous sport, that they were really chasing that emotion.
00:34:55.987 --> 00:34:58.762
And and so you're totally right.
00:34:58.762 --> 00:35:06.748
I think, obviously people do that in other darker areas like alcohol addiction and that kind of stuff, but you really hit the nail on the head.
00:35:06.748 --> 00:35:09.387
It's really about having that balance and that.
00:35:09.447 --> 00:35:23.384
Awareness of when to let go, when you have control to attach and let go of the experiences that you see, can, I think that's a really fundamental concept to, to share with listeners just to be aware of that as well.
00:35:23.385 --> 00:35:32.875
Initiate before I ask my last question where can people find you and connect with you and how can they go on your retreats and learn an RP from you?
00:35:33.105 --> 00:35:33.795
Like I have,
00:35:33.911 --> 00:35:38.769
I think the easiest way to connect with me is I think Instagram is the best place.
00:35:38.778 --> 00:35:44.148
You can find me as Shaw that is such a edge underscore mission.
00:35:45.708 --> 00:35:46.338
ideas.
00:35:46.699 --> 00:35:48.858
That's the easiest way to connect with me.
00:35:48.927 --> 00:35:50.715
I've been spending a lot of time on um, health.
00:35:50.715 --> 00:35:51.375
Isn't the end.
00:35:51.405 --> 00:35:52.215
That's a great business.
00:35:52.215 --> 00:35:54.704
and if you connect with people, you can even have great conversations.
00:35:54.688 --> 00:35:54.958
Same.
00:35:54.958 --> 00:36:04.835
You can find me as Nisha Shaw you search quota to find me a decent, I think the easiest way, but if you want to connect professionally so you can find them on LinkedIn, just search permission, shine, and there'll be a new team.
00:36:04.835 --> 00:36:05.315
My profile.
00:36:05.498 --> 00:36:05.858
Perfect.
00:36:05.994 --> 00:36:06.864
My last question there.
00:36:06.873 --> 00:36:07.193
Shit.
00:36:07.289 --> 00:36:11.938
I definitely see you as someone that lives with passion, purpose, and balance in your life.
00:36:11.927 --> 00:36:12.677
I call that.
00:36:12.657 --> 00:36:22.115
To band from within to live your passion, perhaps in balance And having done various retreats with new trainings with you, traveled around the world with you and got to know you over many years.
00:36:22.626 --> 00:36:27.733
What do you think is a one thing, mishit Charlottes you think has enabled you to burn from within
00:36:27.847 --> 00:36:35.606
So I think one thing, if I were to just say one specific thing it's grounded in the experiences that I want to have more than life.
00:36:35.666 --> 00:36:44.414
And what's helped me is it's it's making it unacceptable to not have this experience as for me to start out on any.
00:36:44.405 --> 00:36:49.012
Any other life that doesn't have this experiences, if not acceptable for me.
00:36:49.244 --> 00:36:55.552
And I think that's one of the biggest things that I literally get less than this, the moment I go into that addiction.
00:36:55.641 --> 00:36:55.911
Okay.
00:36:56.391 --> 00:37:00.148
I'm trying to, I'm getting the live divide that I don't want to live.
00:37:00.298 --> 00:37:04.889
And I think the biggest thing that's driving me is early on this strong vision.
00:37:04.916 --> 00:37:14.465
That I have to really create one nest on this planet and that vision drives these experiences and these experiences allows me to have that fire within me.
00:37:14.603 --> 00:37:15.083
Yeah.
00:37:15.130 --> 00:37:27.161
And very powerful vision as well that you have and you have brought so many people together from around the world, running things like the global NLP conference, doing your retreats all over the world.
00:37:27.206 --> 00:37:30.326
Running masterclasses with so many different, interesting.
00:37:30.336 --> 00:37:33.186
Thought leaders and teachers of our time.
00:37:33.172 --> 00:37:37.239
And keep pursuing that vision that you have and living it.
00:37:37.271 --> 00:37:39.762
It's not just the vision you are actually living it now.
00:37:39.786 --> 00:37:50.630
And very interesting about having no tolerance to dropping that standard of whenever you feel you're going off a path and being in congruent with actually who you want to be.
00:37:50.612 --> 00:37:53.155
You, you feel it and you take action and you stop it.
00:37:53.155 --> 00:37:53.936
And that is.
00:37:54.030 --> 00:37:59.014
That is something that I think we all would strive for and can do as well.
00:37:58.990 --> 00:38:04.134
That's something that I am now reflecting on how I can incorporate more of that structure into my life.
00:38:04.373 --> 00:38:04.884
Initiate.
00:38:04.943 --> 00:38:05.873
Thank you so much.
00:38:05.873 --> 00:38:08.153
It's been a really fascinating interview.
00:38:08.153 --> 00:38:12.643
We've talked about a lot of different things and gone deep in, in a lot of different areas, which I love.
00:38:12.693 --> 00:38:13.813
So thank you very much.
00:38:13.862 --> 00:38:21.905
Thank you so much for having me here and as all of this congregation that has such amazing profound assessments, I've loved having this conversation with you.
00:38:22.206 --> 00:38:23.106
Thank you for having me.
00:38:23.465 --> 00:38:23.826
Listen.
00:38:23.856 --> 00:38:24.126
Thanks.
00:38:24.347 --> 00:38:24.797
Wow.
00:38:24.827 --> 00:38:27.498
We talked about a lot of different things in that interview.
00:38:28.157 --> 00:38:28.577
Yep.
00:38:28.757 --> 00:38:33.918
There were some common threads that connected the structure of initiatives thinking process.
00:38:34.458 --> 00:38:42.347
Acceptance for the unexpected in giving up his future career at NASA and in the current COVID spread in India.
00:38:42.947 --> 00:38:46.277
Focusing on what you can control in your career in life.
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Gives you power to feel personal progress in a way to contribute.
00:38:52.307 --> 00:38:54.588
There are many parts in life we can be happy.
00:38:54.588 --> 00:39:13.458
And so if your initial dream doesn't work out by pondering the structure underneath what you wanted from that initial life path, you can generate alternative career or life plans that serve fulfilling those same core values, desired feelings and purpose.
00:39:14.148 --> 00:39:18.677
Check out the show notes for ways to find out more about NLP neuro-linguistic program.
00:39:19.128 --> 00:39:21.318
And designing your life thinking.
00:39:21.708 --> 00:39:23.507
And if you enjoyed this talk.
00:39:23.958 --> 00:39:28.307
Go and leave a review on rate this podcast.com/burn from within that's rate.
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This podcast.com forward slash burn from within.
00:39:31.847 --> 00:39:35.958
Stay updated with more inspiring interviews by hitting the subscribe or follow button.
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And until next time live with passion purpose and balance and burn from