S8 EP18: Ashley Blaker

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Hello, I'm Rob Beckett.
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And I'm Josh Willicombe.
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Welcome to Parenting Hell, the show in which Josh and
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I discuss what it's really like to be a parent,
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which I would say can be a little tricky.
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So, to make ourselves, and hopefully you, feel better about
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the trials and tribulations of modern day parenting, each week
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we'll be chatting to a famous parent about how they're coping.
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Or hopefully how they're not coping.
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And we'll also be hearing from you, the listener, with
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your tips, advice, and of course, tales of parenting woe.
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Because let's be honest, there are plenty of times where
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none of us know what we're doing. Hello, you're listening
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to Parenting Hell with... Penny, can you.
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Say Rob Beckett?
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Rob Beckett.
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Good job. And can you say Josh Widdicombe?
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Josh Widdicombe. Good job.
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Good job.
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Good job. Very good. Very nice.
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Dunstable. Milton Keynes.
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Oh.
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Not far off.
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Oh.
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Oh, that was good. 22-month-old niece Penny had a go
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at the intro today. I think she did a bloody
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good job. You can even hear the little Auntie Gem
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at the end sob. Oh, thanks for the pod. Keep
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up the good work. Lots of love from Auntie Gem
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in Milton Keynes. Four, eight, six months.
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Can I say something?
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What?
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I've smashed that. A 17 miles away Dunstable from Milton Keynes.
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That's my best ever.
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Well done, mate. Told you. Didn't I say this is
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in your imperial phase?
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Yeah. Just everything's clicking. How are you, Josh?
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I'm very good, actually.
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How's Rose?
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She's not here. She's in Cornwall. Do you remember I
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said about something I was worried about? I wonder whether
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we could put this on our Instagram.
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What are you worried about?
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There was something wrong with the house that I was
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worried about.
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Do you remember that?
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Did I say that out loud, Michael?
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No. He's not listening. He's answering the door. What are
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you worried about?
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So, I'll send you a picture. No, you didn't mention this.
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You thought you'd mentioned this on the last episode.
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So, you see that... You see the bottom... I mean, obviously,
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it's incredibly filthy.
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What the hell is that?
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Well, for a start, I don't know.
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Is that your basement of your house? Yeah.
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But look at the bottom. Zoom in at the bottom. There's, like,
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black stuff pouring out the bottom of it, but it's
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just dangling there.
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Is that oil?
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What is that oil? Is that plastic?
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What's in the box?
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I don't know.
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What do you mean you don't know? It's in your house. What?
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What is that bottom? Right, get that on. That's going
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straight up on Instagram. How do you not know what
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that is?
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What is this? Firstly, what is it? Secondly, do I
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need to sort the black goo out of the bottom? Thirdly,
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how do I sort it? The black goo. So it's
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not coming out. It's not moving. It's like stationary, that
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black goo.
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Right. Yeah, that is weird, isn't it? So it might
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just need more goo.
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I don't know.
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It's got Isco 17 written on it.
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Yeah, it's his favourite Real Madrid player.
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What's that say at the top? Quality make? We'll have
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to make sure it's got it on Instagram, otherwise it's
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terrible to listen to. I-S-C-O, is that right?
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Yeah, Isco 17. I don't know what it is, Rob,
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but it's just there, in our house.
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Oh, God.
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Yeah, anyway, if anyone could help me out with that.
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Right, OK, well, yeah, let's try and look at that.
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I've got no idea what that is.
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I'll be honest, when I brought it to you, I
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thought it was more one for the listeners rather than you.
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Sorry, okay, fair enough.
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Well, it's on Instagram.
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Let's find out what's in Josh's house.
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You promised us a story about a harvester.
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Oh, right, yeah.
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Because it's 1993, I'm getting our basement done.
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My kids love Harvester, man. I love Harvester.
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What's going on with your seat?
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Oh, no. So, I've got a bad back because.
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Oh, how the fucking tables have turned.
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No. No. It isn't that bad. I just need to
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twist it a bit. It's where I sat with an
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inflatable giraffe fan stuck in my back for an hour
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in a car.
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You've got a giraffe back?
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I've got a giraffe back. So, it's a bit... I
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was just twisting out as I was chatting. They often
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have bad necks. My kids love Harvester. The stiffest of
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all the nets.
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The stiffest of all the nets.
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So the one who's got Harvester. So my daughter was
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at a sleepover. I said, I'll take you for dinner.
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Do you want to bring a friend? Where do you
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want to go? She said her friend and she said
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the Harvester.
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Yeah, great.
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And then she wanted to change her clothes, right? So
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I pick her and her friend up from school. They've
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been on like this funder, like it's organised by the
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PTA where they go in a hall and it's like
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a big crazy party, but they do it as a
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fundraising thing every year. So they're buzzed up on sugar
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because they've had sweets, they've had an entertainer and they're mad.
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So I get them and I pick them up and
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they're screaming with excitement. And they've both got bags to
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change into clothes to go for dinner, right? But I've
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got them in the car. So obviously it's my daughter
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and then obviously her daughter's friend. And they're about six
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or six or seven. So we get to the harvester
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and then I get the key for the disabled toilet
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to use for them to get changed. And I gave
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them their bags. You two go in there and get changed.
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I'll wait outside.
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Yeah.
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So I'm stood there with the door shut. My daughter goes,
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why don't you come in and help us? I can't
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because your friend's here. Yeah. You know, and stuff like that.
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It doesn't matter.
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You've seen my bits.
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I was like, yes. Obviously, because you're my daughter, I
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cannot be stood in a toilet watching you and your
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friend get jacked. You're grown up now. This is what happens.
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Even were you to face the wall in a kind
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of Blair Witch Project situation, you don't want.
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You don't want to have to explain that to the
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parents when they say, my daughter said you came and
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watched Get Changed. That's Get Changed. Exactly, yeah.
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So anyway, so I was just stood outside the door
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of the disabled toilet, right? Bear in mind, I'm going
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to the Brits the next night. I don't think anyone
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else is doing this as a doubleheader. The amount of
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time in my life when I think it's absurd.
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And you don't realise this when people are on television
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or they're going to something. How... adjacent is in your
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life to the just really crap weird moments do you
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know what i mean when.
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You're so mundane life is so mundane and then there's
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occasional weird things you have to go to because of
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your job yeah exactly i'm waiting outside the toilet and
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they're in there for And every time I say, go,
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are you all right, girls? They go, go away. I'm not,
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I'm getting checked. So then I can't open to hurry.
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So I'm basically at the mercy of them being ready.
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Yeah.
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So they're screaming. It takes ages. And he eventually get
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them out. Then we're in the harvester. And then they're
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just too overexcited, going mad. And then I'm letting them
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go to the buffet themselves to get the salad bowl
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back and forth. And then I can hear them. They go, oh,
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we're going on a shortcut. And then I turn around.
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I've lost them. They're walking around the entire restaurant. And
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I realised my daughter's kicked her shoe off. with one
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shoe on, walk around the restaurant singing the Willy Willy
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Bum Bum song. Do you know the Willy Willy Bum
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Bum song?
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I think you've mentioned it before.
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Yeah, so basically Romesh told me about it, his kids
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love it, and then I played it once, my kids
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are obsessed with it, but now they've been telling kids
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at school about the Willy Willy Bum Bum song.
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Yeah.
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But now they're wandering around the restaurant with one shoe on,
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singing Willy Willy Bum Bum. But I just couldn't, in
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the end, they were screaming, and I'd been busy, because
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I'd been busy all week, And then I went home
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and I had a migraine tablet and went to bed
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at 8 p.m.
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With my daughter.
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Oh, my God. Oh, God. Because my headache was so bad. But, yeah,
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it's just being stood outside the disabled toilet in half.
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Oh, God, that is stressful. But I couldn't go in
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and I couldn't get him dressed.
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Because I've never had to do that before with, like,
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another person's kid, like, getting changed. I was like, sort
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this stuff out.
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There'll be a period when, like, my daughter's having showers
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with me. Yeah. And then it was difficult... Because Rose's
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mum obviously isn't coming to watch that. But Rose's mum
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would normally come for the bath. If Rose's mum is
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here and my daughter's having a bath, Rose's mum will
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come up, yeah?
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Yeah, just, yeah. But it has to stop at some age,
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doesn't it?
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It does. And yeah, and so it's difficult to explain
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to my daughter, well, obviously Rose's mum isn't going to
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come up and watch me have a shower.
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No, not with Rose here.
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Well, don't worry, she's not here.
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I tell you, if anyone's up for an affair with Josh,
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he's got loads of time.
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But also, yes, we had cousins here recently and then
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they're like, oh, let's have a bath with the cousins.
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And then you're like, is this weird? Because I don't really,
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I'm not blood relative to this child. Yeah, no. Because
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they're cousins on Rose's side. So I'm now, you know.
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I'm not a fan of cousins having baths together. No,
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I'm not really a fan of it.
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But then it's kind of, well, friends even. So when
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we went to, when we went to, what is it called? Amphulia,
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all four girls were in the bath together. And then
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their daughter's going.
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Well, yeah, I find it weird. And I, yeah, I'm
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not a fan of that. Like, oh, let's all get,
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but then like, yeah, no, I don't think bath. I
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think in the swimming pool and all that, but they
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don't need to have a bath together.
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Yeah, but then it's a time thing as much as anything.
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Well, just chuck them all in together at the bath.
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Well, like, also they're reluctant to have a bath because
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they want to play with their friends.
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Who wants to bath four children?
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Yeah.
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Oh, and if anyone's too eager to put themselves forward,
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I'm suspicious. Oh, Trey, come on. Let's go, girls. Come on. No, no, no,
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you wait there.
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There you go.
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Rest your legs, Josh. I'll take her yeah no like
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when they go let's just all chuck them in the
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bathtub I'm like no I don't really like that yeah
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well they're starting to want to have their own baths
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now my girls they do have fun in there and
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play in there but I think yeah I don't I
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think siblings is okay I'm not a big fan of
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the cousins and friends in a bath together Right, Josh,
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this episode, Absolute Blinder. Lots going on.
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This is incredible. I implore everyone to put down their book.
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What's serial killers reading a book and listening to a podcast?
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Just in. this is ashley blaker um ashley has six
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children yes um three.
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Are neurodivergent he uses the term special needs or additional
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needs yeah and he also has a um yeah one
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of his children has um Down syndrome and she's adopted
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adopted and a mental age of I think two or
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three year old or something like that so it's a
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very complicated but amazing story so have a listen to this.
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Ashley Blaker hello hello How are you? It's Canada time, right? Yes,
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at least.
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Luckily, I'm on the east coast of Canada, so I'm
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in Montreal, so it's five hours behind. It's quarter past
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five where I am at the moment, but it's fine.
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It's all good. Ashley, we offered you slightly later slot.
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We said 10 a.m. or 11 a.m. You went for
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the early one. You an early riser? No, not at all,
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but I think if you're away from your kids, it's
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the least you can do is to be sympathetic and
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at least get up early anyway, as if they've worked
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a meal.
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And and now this is going to uh blow people's
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minds could you tell us we always like to start
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with uh the setup how many kids you've got the
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setup of your house.
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Yeah so i've got six kids that's right six kids
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be like when on on the football on the vidi
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printer when they write it in brackets it's it's it's
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at that level of kids and what ages are they
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So they've grown up a little bit now, luckily, so
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I can come and do a gig in Montreal. My
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eldest will be 20 in July. My youngest has recently
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turned 10. So there was a very busy 10-year period. Oh,
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my God.
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Yes. Oh, wow.
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So how many did you have under what age? So
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you would have had six under 10? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
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But also we had at one point 300. under two
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almost uh something like that like my eldest son i
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know it doesn't seem possible my eldest son was born
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in july 2000 my yeah july 2004 next one was
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august 2005 so it was like uh a 13 month
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gap and then the next one october 2007 so october
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2007 yeah we had a newborn and One who'd just
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turned one and one who'd just turned two. I mean,
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I don't even know why. You must have had a
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three-month-old when you got pregnant again. Yes. I mean, not
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me personally, but yes.
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No, of course.
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It was a couple. Respect. Big respect to both of you.
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Make that clear.
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Straight back in. And did you always want lots of kids?
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No.
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I don't know why.
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Well, I think part of it was I was thinking ahead.
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I was thinking, I really want to get on a
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good podcast. I'm probably not famous enough to get on
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Off Menu. But at the very least, I thought, you
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know what? If I have loads of kids, at least
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Rob and Josh will have me on. Look, it worked.
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I've got a very addictive personality. Lots of my life
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is just a series of hyper fixations. Right. Massive. Big
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football fan, but there was a 10-year period where I
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went to every Liverpool game, home, away, Europe, friendlies, you
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name it.
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Oh, wow.
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I've currently got a hyperfixation about tattoos. And there was
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a 10-year period where my hyperfixation was having kids. Yeah. Well,
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between 2004 and 2005, I think it was shaggy, actually.
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LAUGHTER So you're doing the normal schmormal. Is that the
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tour you're doing in Montreal at the moment?
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No, I was doing a different event, a one-off show,
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and I'm doing a lot of shows all over North
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America at the moment.
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And it says, because you've written the book as well,
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and it says, because you've got on the front, because
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I wanted to ask you about this. It's called My
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Occasionally Helpful Guide to Parenting Kids with Special Needs. Now,
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I thought special needs wasn't used anymore. I thought it
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was additional needs. But that felt like, but I don't know.
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I'm not going to be cancelled on this podcast. No,
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absolutely not. I imagine being cancelled by Rob Beckett. Surely
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I'd be the first. I didn't know what the term,
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if you haven't got it.
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Special educational needs now, isn't it?
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I know. There's so many. I can't. It's probably changed
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again since they published the book. You've got your own
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needs and whatever it is, and the kids have. So
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it's up to you what you want to call it.
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They're your kids and it's your life. Well, here's the thing.
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So I've got six kids. That wasn't me having a dig,
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by the way. I just don't know. And I'm always
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trying to say the right thing. No, I don't know.
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You're right.
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And I think there are special educational needs. But the
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thing is, I just come from my own terminology. So
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I've got three kids with a diagnosis and three without
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a diagnosis. But, you know, as the title of the
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book suggests, I don't like the word normal.
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Yeah. So I call them zappers and cold plays. Right.
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So mainstream kids are like cold play. OK. Perfectly good,
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but rather boring. Yeah. they're the missionary position of children
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yeah okay so the special needs kids of my special
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needs kids at least are more like frank zapper they're
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like rebellious alternative sometimes unspeakably shit but they don't care
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They don't care.
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They just do their own thing. And that's all that matters.
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So I don't know, special needs, special educational needs. But yes,
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we've got I've got two sons with autism and ADHD.
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And and then we adopted. And that's the other thing, actually.
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So we had five biological children and we actually adopted
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a child as well. Who's my elder daughter, who is
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now 16 and she has Down syndrome. So we have
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so much. I mean, we have so much going on
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in our house, like autism, ADHD, Down syndrome, mobility issues,
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gastroenterological problems, heart defects, hearing loss. But you know you've
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got a lot going on when Great Ormond Street gives
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you your own parking space.
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That is what's happening in my house. And you've got
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autism and ADHD as well. And that was a later diagnosis.
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Is that right? That's right. Yeah. That has come across,
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I'm sure, very clearly already. No, no, I've read that.
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I didn't just sort of get it.
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Foot for punt. Imagine if you went, no, we haven't.
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I'm like, come on, mate. So I wrote this book, right?
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Yeah.
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And I had to do a minute.
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I mean, it's basically a memoir and a how-to guide.
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But I had to do a very little bit of
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research for it as well. And as I'm writing this
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book about my children's sensory needs and their social awkwardness
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and their hyperfixations, I'm thinking, blimey, this is me. Well,
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after writing the book, I decided to get myself assessed. And, yeah,
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I was diagnosed with autism and ADHD, which surprised no one.
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And... I once said to Matt Lucas, I think I
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might be on the spectrum. And he said, on the spectrum,
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you are the spectrum. So I've actually written for the paperback.
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I've actually written a new, a small extra bit about that.
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And I'm going to write a new book as well about,
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called it Typical Schmipical. That plays stuff.
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And about my life of just crazy hyper fixations online.
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What, like, say five years ago when they were younger
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and stuff, what was a morning like between waking up
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and them being at school or nursery or whatever, however
389
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it worked?
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It's just absolute chaos. And when I was trying to
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get them out in the morning, like, you'd just, like,
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be forgetting kids. My daughter's got Down syndrome. She obviously, like,
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she's 16 now, but she has, like, the mental age
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of a, two or three-year-old, and she still requires so
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much help getting ready in the morning, getting dressed. She's
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very destructive, particularly when she's bored. So if you take
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your eyes off her for two minutes, she's like drawing
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on the walls. She draws on her face. I sent
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her to school looking like a Down syndrome post Malone.
400
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And is she at a special school?
401
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Yeah, she goes to a special school, yeah.
402
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And do the other kids, did they go to special school?
403
00:18:43.710 --> 00:18:44.440
No, no.
404
00:18:44.640 --> 00:18:47.599
So my, actually, this is something I talk about in
405
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the book, actually. It's really difficult with finding schools. That's
406
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one of the hardest things.
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00:18:52.190 --> 00:18:55.539
Yeah. So I've got three kids, let's say, with three zappers,
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three kids with diagnosis. So one goes to a special school, great.
409
00:18:59.940 --> 00:19:04.920
My third son, Dylan, goes very happily to a mainstream
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school with a little bit of support. He has like
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15 hours of LSA time, learning support system time. Would
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you say he's quite similar to you in the regard
413
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that there's things going on but different? he's sort of
414
00:19:17.089 --> 00:19:19.630
he's sort of fine in sort of school and society
415
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yeah well yeah I mean as for me I mean
416
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I was actually very academic and so I didn't have
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any education I think that's what actually threw me off
418
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the scent genuinely yeah people used to take the piss
419
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and go oh you're Rain Man autistic yeah The thing is,
420
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I went to Oxford. I didn't have any educational needs.
421
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But yeah, so I've got one at special school. Then
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Dylan goes to mainstream school, perfectly fine, tiny bit of support.
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But then my eldest son, that was the challenge because
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he falls between two stools. I always compare it to,
425
00:19:49.490 --> 00:19:53.079
you know how there's... footballers, right, that are not good
426
00:19:53.140 --> 00:19:55.359
enough for the Premier League but too good for the Championship?
427
00:19:55.579 --> 00:19:59.960
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Your types. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So that's
428
00:20:00.000 --> 00:20:02.359
what he's like. Adi Akinbaye at Palace.
429
00:20:02.759 --> 00:20:03.339
That's Adam.
430
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He's not.
431
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He's not capable of being in a mainstream school, but
432
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he's definitely not got the kind of needs that would
433
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require a special school. And so he just, to be
434
00:20:14.609 --> 00:20:18.019
honest with you, he wasn't made for education. He went
435
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to more schools than an Ofsted inspector. He eventually went
436
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to a sixth form college. He got his GCSEs in
437
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English and maths at the third attempt in And, yeah,
438
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I was incredibly proud of him just to manage that because.
439
00:20:34.480 --> 00:20:36.599
Education wasn't for him. Yeah.
440
00:20:37.079 --> 00:20:41.599
And what's the kind of... What happens to him now? Like,
441
00:20:41.680 --> 00:20:43.359
what path can he go on?
442
00:20:43.880 --> 00:20:46.859
Well, he worked for a year at McDonald's, which he
443
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really liked.
444
00:20:47.359 --> 00:20:50.579
Obviously, we have to do a lot of this work, like,
445
00:20:50.599 --> 00:20:54.240
to get him... Like, I'm doing all the applications.
446
00:20:54.279 --> 00:20:58.150
I'm finding... He's very passive like that. So then... I
447
00:20:58.210 --> 00:21:02.230
found him a job at Heathrow Airport, which required so
448
00:21:02.329 --> 00:21:06.710
much work on our part of the forms, obviously, like security.
449
00:21:07.539 --> 00:21:09.279
And I mean, he had to do it.
450
00:21:09.299 --> 00:21:11.400
So for that, and this sounds, by the way, like
451
00:21:11.420 --> 00:21:13.700
I'm making some of these stories up. I promise this
452
00:21:13.759 --> 00:21:16.180
is true, right? He had to do a job interview
453
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on Zoom. And just before the interview started, I popped
454
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my head into his bedroom to discover that he had
455
00:21:22.359 --> 00:21:24.779
set up his Zoom username as at.
456
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Com. you will never get a job and he's literally
457
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like oh really oh right I think change it to
458
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Adam Blake do me a favour and he's mad yeah
459
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um but he he he loves it that is insane
460
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so will he um be able to move out and
461
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have his own place and stuff like that as he
462
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gets older or what's what do you think yeah I
463
00:21:52.680 --> 00:21:56.099
think so definitely I would hope so um No, I
464
00:21:56.119 --> 00:21:57.019
definitely hope so. Yeah.
465
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And he's, you know, I think he genuinely was so
466
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proud of him. He didn't talk until he was eight
467
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years old.
468
00:22:04.029 --> 00:22:07.450
Wow. Yeah, he took eight years to learn to speak.
469
00:22:07.609 --> 00:22:09.910
And on becoming a teenager, it took eight seconds to
470
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learn to swear. Right. He was bleeped in our house.
471
00:22:14.009 --> 00:22:18.279
It would sound like we were living with R2-D2. Really? Non-stop. Yeah.
472
00:22:18.670 --> 00:22:21.549
With the daughter you've got who's got Down syndrome, I
473
00:22:21.589 --> 00:22:24.609
don't know, because we've had quite a lot of kids,
474
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parents of children with Asperger's or autism or ADHD. So
475
00:22:30.460 --> 00:22:32.940
what are the kind of needs of looking after someone
476
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with Down syndrome?
477
00:22:34.380 --> 00:22:38.660
Well, so Down syndrome, again, like autism, has got a
478
00:22:38.700 --> 00:22:42.849
very wide spectrum and range of needs. I mean, Down
479
00:22:42.869 --> 00:22:47.849
syndrome is the same. And actually, one of my big annoyances, actually,
480
00:22:47.950 --> 00:22:56.000
with like certain charities that will promote the incredible achievements
481
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of people with Down syndrome is that they focus so
482
00:22:58.869 --> 00:23:03.230
much on the incredible, the kind of black swans who are,
483
00:23:04.049 --> 00:23:07.470
you know, who have won BAFTAs and run conferences and,
484
00:23:08.190 --> 00:23:11.869
There's a model with Down syndrome that's on the front
485
00:23:11.890 --> 00:23:14.789
cover of Vogue. And there's someone with Down syndrome who's
486
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a Victoria's Secret model.
487
00:23:16.869 --> 00:23:19.529
Our daughter will never be like that, I would say.
488
00:23:19.549 --> 00:23:26.109
As I say, she's 16. She has all the hormones of... No, sorry,
489
00:23:26.210 --> 00:23:26.509
she's 15.
490
00:23:26.490 --> 00:23:30.630
She'll be 16 this year. She has the hormones of
491
00:23:30.650 --> 00:23:34.140
a 15-year-old. But yeah, she has a mental age of...
492
00:23:34.480 --> 00:23:37.920
kind of two, three-year-old. She spends most of the day watching.
493
00:23:38.200 --> 00:23:42.910
She loves Mr. Tumble and all the kind of toys
494
00:23:42.950 --> 00:23:47.269
that a toddler would enjoy. She has a lot of
495
00:23:47.730 --> 00:23:48.470
physical needs.
496
00:23:48.490 --> 00:23:49.009
She's quite.
497
00:23:50.490 --> 00:23:54.859
Weak muscular uh issues so she she's he has a
498
00:23:54.880 --> 00:23:57.519
room downstairs she doesn't really like going up and downstairs
499
00:23:57.539 --> 00:24:00.099
he's had a lot of heart issues in her life
500
00:24:00.799 --> 00:24:07.809
um hearing issues gastro issues hospital like we're just constantly
501
00:24:08.349 --> 00:24:12.519
in hospital appointments it's just extraordinary um but she's i
502
00:24:12.539 --> 00:24:15.859
mean she really i you You know, I'm sure everyone says, oh,
503
00:24:16.200 --> 00:24:17.940
I love all my children equally.
504
00:24:18.019 --> 00:24:20.660
But no, she's just a little bit above everyone else.
505
00:24:20.799 --> 00:24:25.400
She's like, she's the real love for me.
506
00:24:25.619 --> 00:24:27.390
You know how, like, loving your child, there's a little
507
00:24:27.430 --> 00:24:30.990
bit of narcissism involved because they're like an instinctive... She's not,
508
00:24:31.130 --> 00:24:32.809
she's not, she shares none of my genes.
509
00:24:32.849 --> 00:24:35.349
I don't even have that. It's just this very pure
510
00:24:35.589 --> 00:24:36.630
love that I have for her.
511
00:24:37.210 --> 00:24:41.759
And what does her going through her teenage hormones mean
512
00:24:42.160 --> 00:24:46.380
when she's watching... Mr. Tumble, like, how does that articulate?
513
00:24:46.599 --> 00:24:51.140
So, I mean, well, obviously, physically, so, like, she can't,
514
00:24:51.259 --> 00:24:54.079
she needs a lot of personal care, but she's actually
515
00:24:54.119 --> 00:24:55.099
started her periods and all.
516
00:24:54.980 --> 00:24:57.269
That kind of stuff. Right, yeah, yeah. But, like, those
517
00:24:57.309 --> 00:24:59.609
kind of, like, teenage hormones, or, like, you know, just
518
00:24:59.789 --> 00:25:01.670
angry teenage, I mean, you've got all this to look
519
00:25:01.690 --> 00:25:05.529
forward to, just teenagers are so angry. Yeah. Yeah. No,
520
00:25:05.690 --> 00:25:09.700
so she's going through, I guess she has elements of that.
521
00:25:09.720 --> 00:25:13.000
She gets very destructive when she's bored. She really has
522
00:25:13.019 --> 00:25:17.160
to be occupied a lot because she will just start
523
00:25:17.839 --> 00:25:21.220
stuffing wet wipes down the toilet. And we couldn't get
524
00:25:21.299 --> 00:25:24.559
any hot water. And I just couldn't work out what
525
00:25:24.579 --> 00:25:29.289
was going on, called the plumber around. And he couldn't
526
00:25:29.309 --> 00:25:30.730
work it out. And he went to the utility room
527
00:25:30.789 --> 00:25:33.190
and just realized that the switch had just been turned off.
528
00:25:34.049 --> 00:25:38.380
And she just goes around touching switches. She's always turning
529
00:25:38.420 --> 00:25:40.359
off lights and stuff. Like he didn't charge me. He
530
00:25:40.380 --> 00:25:42.900
was very kind of him. That's nice.
531
00:25:43.710 --> 00:25:47.029
I've had a similar thing where it's just been that
532
00:25:47.109 --> 00:25:49.500
I didn't understand that there was a, trip switch or whatever,
533
00:25:49.519 --> 00:25:51.869
and they have charged me in that situation. So that's good.
534
00:25:52.529 --> 00:25:57.079
Yeah, I think that's you being lazy there as opposed to.
535
00:25:57.089 --> 00:26:00.400
Yeah, I suppose once you say I've got a daughter
536
00:26:00.420 --> 00:26:03.039
with Down syndrome who's done that, it's difficult for them
537
00:26:03.059 --> 00:26:05.019
to charge you in that situation at that point.
538
00:26:05.039 --> 00:26:06.380
She's got Down syndrome and they meant the age of
539
00:26:06.420 --> 00:26:09.869
a three-year-old. So how much again? Thank you. That is
540
00:26:09.970 --> 00:26:14.869
one of the main reasons we adopted her, yes. That
541
00:26:14.930 --> 00:26:18.430
and a blue bag. Very good. Very handy for shopping.
542
00:26:18.769 --> 00:26:21.670
How do you... Because you've categorised your kids as the
543
00:26:21.750 --> 00:26:25.019
zappers and the cold play. So the kids without the
544
00:26:25.450 --> 00:26:27.500
extra needs, the cold play. Do they get on with
545
00:26:27.519 --> 00:26:30.880
the zappers? Is it like, how do they blend in? Obviously, because,
546
00:26:30.940 --> 00:26:33.559
you know, it's difficult for them. If they need some
547
00:26:33.599 --> 00:26:35.740
help with their homework or whatever, but then your daughter
548
00:26:35.779 --> 00:26:38.099
needs help, it's like... It's hard for them to go, no,
549
00:26:38.220 --> 00:26:40.849
I want, you know, because all kids fight for their
550
00:26:40.869 --> 00:26:43.369
parents' attention. But when there's six, and on top of
551
00:26:43.410 --> 00:26:46.549
there being six, there's all different needs. How do you
552
00:26:46.569 --> 00:26:48.710
manage that? How does that work? Yeah, you're right.
553
00:26:48.750 --> 00:26:51.349
I mean, no, for sure, in terms of the fighting
554
00:26:51.369 --> 00:26:53.349
for attention. And actually, one thing I will say also
555
00:26:53.369 --> 00:26:53.849
about my kids.
556
00:26:54.190 --> 00:26:59.839
They would have made brilliant 1970s shop stewards because they're
557
00:26:59.859 --> 00:27:03.000
like forever looking for little grievances of like, he had this,
558
00:27:03.180 --> 00:27:05.240
I had, you know, I've got that, all that.
559
00:27:05.829 --> 00:27:09.970
It's like Kenneth Cope's character in Carry On At Your Convenience.
560
00:27:10.009 --> 00:27:12.910
They're always looking for things that could lead a walkout.
561
00:27:13.289 --> 00:27:16.630
But I was very careful to use the word diagnosed.
562
00:27:16.690 --> 00:27:20.450
I have three diagnosed children. That is to say the
563
00:27:20.599 --> 00:27:25.279
other children. Look, they came out of my bull sack. So,
564
00:27:26.160 --> 00:27:30.660
you know, let's be honest here. My fourth son, Edward, he.
565
00:27:30.799 --> 00:27:34.279
I would say, has more classic signs of autism than
566
00:27:35.200 --> 00:27:41.599
So why has.
567
00:27:39.349 --> 00:27:40.509
He not been diagnosed?
568
00:27:41.329 --> 00:27:45.789
Because he doesn't have. Well, firstly, we genuinely raised it
569
00:27:45.869 --> 00:27:49.789
once with the doctor, with a psychologist who said, look,
570
00:27:49.890 --> 00:27:53.789
I don't mind doing another assessment. But frankly, people wouldn't
571
00:27:53.829 --> 00:27:57.829
believe you. he said this is just getting ridiculous now
572
00:27:58.250 --> 00:28:03.119
so genuinely he's doing really well at school and he
573
00:28:03.160 --> 00:28:05.099
has no you know just as I said that I
574
00:28:05.279 --> 00:28:07.119
might have autism and ADHD but I don't have any
575
00:28:07.319 --> 00:28:10.750
educational needs I don't need any yes he doesn't have
576
00:28:10.869 --> 00:28:14.269
he doesn't need it so my view is is that,
577
00:28:14.309 --> 00:28:16.539
you know what, if he, as an adult, when he's
578
00:28:16.619 --> 00:28:19.799
my age, if he wants to get himself assessed or young, whatever,
579
00:28:20.339 --> 00:28:23.119
then that's fine, that's his choice. But at the moment,
580
00:28:24.099 --> 00:28:27.779
it wouldn't need it. He just doesn't need it. But
581
00:28:27.799 --> 00:28:29.440
they get on really well. One thing about having a
582
00:28:29.500 --> 00:28:32.440
big family, they get on so well. My eldest two
583
00:28:32.460 --> 00:28:35.309
sons are absolute best friends. They just do everything together.
584
00:28:36.630 --> 00:28:37.369
And it's lovely.
585
00:28:37.430 --> 00:28:40.849
I really do get genuine pleasure out of seeing them
586
00:28:40.890 --> 00:28:42.630
the way they all get on.
587
00:28:42.730 --> 00:28:45.210
Of course, they argue, but it's lovely.
588
00:28:45.579 --> 00:28:48.380
And what do you think when you work on Fantasy
589
00:28:48.420 --> 00:28:52.460
Football League and Ellis James is coming in and he's
590
00:28:52.740 --> 00:28:57.470
got two kids who are Coldplay's. And he's going, God,
591
00:28:57.509 --> 00:28:59.599
a tough morning. I had to get them to school
592
00:28:59.690 --> 00:29:04.119
or whatever. And then you hear me or Rob complain
593
00:29:04.160 --> 00:29:07.500
about how difficult our lives are. Because I find people
594
00:29:07.519 --> 00:29:09.619
with one kid, I'm like, fucking, you don't know the
595
00:29:09.700 --> 00:29:12.089
half of it. How does it feel to you when
596
00:29:12.119 --> 00:29:13.470
you hear people like us talk?
597
00:29:14.029 --> 00:29:17.130
Yeah, look, it doesn't just because it doesn't, I mean,
598
00:29:17.210 --> 00:29:20.950
in all seriousness, it doesn't diminish anyone else's workload and
599
00:29:20.990 --> 00:29:21.829
how hard it is.
600
00:29:22.390 --> 00:29:25.319
And whether you have one or two, you know, and
601
00:29:25.339 --> 00:29:28.420
as I say, it's not, in our case, it's not
602
00:29:28.480 --> 00:29:30.900
just the number, it's actually those needs and what have you.
603
00:29:32.519 --> 00:29:34.890
One of the things when you have got neurodiverse kids,
604
00:29:35.289 --> 00:29:39.000
like my eldest son, say he's got autism adhd the
605
00:29:39.039 --> 00:29:41.359
midwife didn't look at him and say oh your child
606
00:29:42.019 --> 00:29:44.839
is autistic it doesn't work this is something that gets
607
00:29:44.920 --> 00:29:47.630
assessed like at a snail's pace so he was assessed
608
00:29:47.910 --> 00:29:50.950
uh uh he was diagnosed at three years of age
609
00:29:51.369 --> 00:29:53.950
and then my third son was diagnosed at six so
610
00:29:54.150 --> 00:29:57.119
had he been like had a child had come out
611
00:29:57.420 --> 00:30:00.279
of uh the womb and you'd immediately gone right this
612
00:30:00.339 --> 00:30:02.839
child's got autism and he's going to be an absolute
613
00:30:02.859 --> 00:30:05.869
load of work then maybe we'd have thought twice about
614
00:30:05.910 --> 00:30:09.930
having so many more kids so but of course yeah
615
00:30:09.970 --> 00:30:12.990
you know that's that's the trouble that you you you
616
00:30:13.009 --> 00:30:14.599
know to say not that i don't love him and
617
00:30:14.690 --> 00:30:19.009
wouldn't want to return anyway but it that's something that Yeah,
618
00:30:19.049 --> 00:30:22.009
you don't always know what is in your midst.
619
00:30:22.089 --> 00:30:26.269
Of course. So when did you adopt? What stage of
620
00:30:26.829 --> 00:30:28.869
the kids were that and how old was your daughter?
621
00:30:28.890 --> 00:30:32.509
Four boys. Four boys, yeah? Four boys.
622
00:30:33.109 --> 00:30:37.730
And the youngest was like almost not even a few
623
00:30:37.769 --> 00:30:42.369
months old. So this is the craziest thing. I don't
624
00:30:42.390 --> 00:30:46.089
know how this even happened. I was sat at home
625
00:30:46.289 --> 00:30:49.759
one evening thinking, looking at a local newspaper, and I
626
00:30:49.880 --> 00:30:54.880
saw this advert that said, opt to adopt. Zoe is
627
00:30:54.960 --> 00:30:57.789
simply beautiful. Could you be the family for her?
628
00:30:58.589 --> 00:31:02.410
And actually, really, it said it had simply beautiful in quotes,
629
00:31:02.869 --> 00:31:06.470
in quote marks. As a comedian, it really bothered me
630
00:31:06.490 --> 00:31:08.589
because they hadn't cited where that came from.
631
00:31:09.829 --> 00:31:10.250
Chortle.
632
00:31:10.930 --> 00:31:12.930
It felt like that, Lee. It felt like a made-up
633
00:31:12.970 --> 00:31:18.130
pull quote. I can't put that on my tour poster. No, no.
634
00:31:18.210 --> 00:31:22.849
It's so beautiful, the times. And I saw this. And
635
00:31:22.950 --> 00:31:25.049
for some, so it said, you know, we need a
636
00:31:25.069 --> 00:31:29.829
family from the London borough of Hackney and a places advert.
637
00:31:30.269 --> 00:31:32.950
And I don't know why, it just spoke to me
638
00:31:33.130 --> 00:31:36.279
and I spoke to Gemma and she had seen it independently.
639
00:31:36.339 --> 00:31:38.200
And we just both thought, you know what, we could
640
00:31:38.220 --> 00:31:38.440
do this.
641
00:31:38.930 --> 00:31:44.670
But how we managed to get past this assessment process,
642
00:31:44.890 --> 00:31:46.710
because the assessment process, right, if you don't know much
643
00:31:46.750 --> 00:31:48.269
about it, there's no reason why you wouldn't know a
644
00:31:48.309 --> 00:31:52.250
lot about it. It is so arduous and it takes
645
00:31:52.349 --> 00:31:54.089
the best part of a year. But also, you know
646
00:31:54.109 --> 00:31:58.269
how like basically any pair of spotty teenagers could have
647
00:31:58.329 --> 00:31:59.990
sex tonight and make a.
648
00:31:59.990 --> 00:32:04.059
Baby and no one can stop them. But I feel
649
00:32:04.099 --> 00:32:08.740
really bad for parents who, particularly if they can't have
650
00:32:08.779 --> 00:32:13.619
children and want to adopt. The hoops you have to
651
00:32:13.759 --> 00:32:18.420
jump through are absolutely crazy. And they ask you the
652
00:32:18.460 --> 00:32:21.990
most nuts questions about your life. Like, they want to
653
00:32:22.170 --> 00:32:26.089
uncover everything. Like, once the social worker asked me, she
654
00:32:26.109 --> 00:32:28.009
actually rang me in a panic and went, oh, there's
655
00:32:28.029 --> 00:32:30.569
a big hole in the report about you. I said, oh, yeah,
656
00:32:30.589 --> 00:32:33.720
what is it? She said, when you were in primary school,
657
00:32:34.000 --> 00:32:38.000
did you get invited to many birthday parties? Yeah, like...
658
00:32:42.230 --> 00:32:44.609
You need to know how much jelly I ate when
659
00:32:44.670 --> 00:32:47.829
I was 10. That's mad, isn't it? So my friends
660
00:32:47.849 --> 00:32:50.789
were trying to adopt, and I was one of their, like, references.
661
00:32:51.269 --> 00:32:53.150
And they were chatting, and the questions they were asking,
662
00:32:53.170 --> 00:32:54.299
the way I was talking about it, it was like,
663
00:32:54.450 --> 00:32:56.410
with such suspicion. I know you don't want to give
664
00:32:56.450 --> 00:32:59.259
a kid to anyone kind of thing, but... And in
665
00:32:59.279 --> 00:33:01.559
the end, I don't think they could get it because
666
00:33:01.579 --> 00:33:03.519
they had a flat and there were some stairs in
667
00:33:03.539 --> 00:33:05.039
their flat. They were a little bit steep that you'd
668
00:33:05.079 --> 00:33:06.960
need like a stair gate. They went, oh, the flat's
669
00:33:07.000 --> 00:33:09.559
not suitable for kids. I was like, well, if that's
670
00:33:09.579 --> 00:33:11.920
the case, most houses in the country aren't suitable for kids.
671
00:33:11.940 --> 00:33:14.279
But when you have a baby, they were trying to
672
00:33:14.299 --> 00:33:17.990
adopt a baby. But when you have a baby, you
673
00:33:18.029 --> 00:33:19.730
do live in a flat that's unsuitable for about six
674
00:33:19.750 --> 00:33:22.069
months to a year, but that's because you're carrying them everywhere.
675
00:33:22.089 --> 00:33:25.569
It don't matter. And then you move and you're trusted
676
00:33:25.589 --> 00:33:27.849
to be an adult. Like you say, anyone could go
677
00:33:27.869 --> 00:33:30.859
and have a kid biologically and have this kid anywhere
678
00:33:30.880 --> 00:33:33.700
in any house. I'm like, let's not stop a child
679
00:33:33.839 --> 00:33:36.900
and a couple from having a lovely life together. Let's
680
00:33:36.940 --> 00:33:38.579
take some fucking stairs on your floor.
681
00:33:39.470 --> 00:33:40.069
Right, exactly.
682
00:33:41.369 --> 00:33:42.170
And I do, exactly.
683
00:33:42.210 --> 00:33:44.210
They do this for good reason, obviously, and particularly because
684
00:33:45.329 --> 00:33:50.150
many adopted children will be among the most vulnerable children.
685
00:33:50.250 --> 00:33:55.529
Obviously, the bar does need to be there. But yeah,
686
00:33:55.710 --> 00:33:58.369
if every parent had to jump through these hoops and
687
00:33:58.390 --> 00:34:00.910
meet these criteria, no one would have any kids.
688
00:34:00.950 --> 00:34:01.150
No.
689
00:34:01.490 --> 00:34:03.880
My flat wouldn't have been suitable to have children to adopt,
690
00:34:04.339 --> 00:34:06.180
but we had kids in it because we were privileged
691
00:34:06.200 --> 00:34:10.219
enough to have one biologically. Right, and all the questions
692
00:34:10.239 --> 00:34:12.949
as well, there were so many sex-based questions as well
693
00:34:13.449 --> 00:34:16.590
that were about our sex life that I'm sure the
694
00:34:16.650 --> 00:34:21.170
social worker was just taking a prurient interest. How big's
695
00:34:21.190 --> 00:34:23.869
your knob? Hang on a minute. There were questions like,
696
00:34:24.170 --> 00:34:28.579
how did you find out about sex and who was
697
00:34:28.639 --> 00:34:34.199
most responsible for increasing your awareness? The social worker, and
698
00:34:34.559 --> 00:34:37.380
I'm a very cynical person, comedian, what have you, I
699
00:34:37.440 --> 00:34:39.780
can't take any of this kind of stuff seriously. So
700
00:34:40.099 --> 00:34:42.320
like she once asked, have you ever read a book
701
00:34:42.579 --> 00:34:46.469
or seen a film about adoption? And I replied, yes,
702
00:34:46.849 --> 00:34:52.289
The Omen. I did not find it funny. I don't
703
00:34:52.309 --> 00:34:55.530
know how we managed to get through this. It's quite
704
00:34:55.550 --> 00:34:59.960
a remarkable thing. So she was, I should say, she was, well,
705
00:34:59.980 --> 00:35:03.099
when we started the process, I think she'd just turned one. Wow.
706
00:35:03.739 --> 00:35:06.719
And she moved in with us. Yeah, she would have
707
00:35:06.739 --> 00:35:08.519
been two, two and a bit, two and a half
708
00:35:08.559 --> 00:35:10.239
maybe when she moved in with us. And yeah, she's
709
00:35:10.280 --> 00:35:13.050
now like 15 and a half. So it's been an
710
00:35:13.110 --> 00:35:18.469
amazing journey. And yeah, I don't know quite what is
711
00:35:18.510 --> 00:35:19.969
like a moment of madness, but yeah.
712
00:35:20.679 --> 00:35:25.000
And so it really teaches you a lot, really. And
713
00:35:25.340 --> 00:35:27.519
and there's something quite special, actually, to be able to
714
00:35:27.559 --> 00:35:30.000
look at a child and go, I chose you, you know,
715
00:35:30.019 --> 00:35:32.719
and I chose you how you are. And with all
716
00:35:32.760 --> 00:35:35.239
the needs you have, we chose you the way you
717
00:35:35.400 --> 00:35:37.739
are and the way you'll always be. And we chose
718
00:35:37.780 --> 00:35:39.679
to love you. And that's I think that's something really
719
00:35:39.719 --> 00:35:40.699
special to be able to do that.
720
00:35:44.139 --> 00:35:46.739
And how does she know that? Or can she not
721
00:35:46.800 --> 00:35:47.880
kind of comprehend that?
722
00:35:47.940 --> 00:35:50.440
No, she doesn't know. What, as if she was adopted? No, no,
723
00:35:50.460 --> 00:35:52.139
not at all. She doesn't have contact with her birth
724
00:35:52.159 --> 00:35:55.349
family and stuff. But no, she doesn't have the capacity
725
00:35:55.389 --> 00:35:57.730
to understand that. I mean, nowadays it is the kind
726
00:35:57.750 --> 00:36:02.190
of dumb thing that it's very open. And I think
727
00:36:02.250 --> 00:36:06.610
people who adopt often meet their family or at the
728
00:36:06.630 --> 00:36:08.929
very least know their full stories. But no, she just
729
00:36:08.969 --> 00:36:12.050
doesn't have that. Is it hyperfixation stuff? Is that ADHD
730
00:36:12.110 --> 00:36:14.750
or autism or is it a combination? Is it sort
731
00:36:14.789 --> 00:36:21.750
of a blend? Yeah, I think that's associated more with autism. Look,
732
00:36:21.769 --> 00:36:24.579
I'm no expert in this subject. I really don't want
733
00:36:24.599 --> 00:36:26.820
to talk about it. I'd say, though, you're very well experienced.
734
00:36:26.840 --> 00:36:29.420
I'm well experienced, exactly. It's a personal experience. I'm not
735
00:36:29.519 --> 00:36:34.400
like a doctor in it. No chapter and verse on
736
00:36:34.420 --> 00:36:35.820
all this. But I think that's really important. I think
737
00:36:35.840 --> 00:36:38.670
that's why your book's so good and so important. And
738
00:36:38.690 --> 00:36:42.289
it's had amazing reviews from ellis james is hilarious fascinating
739
00:36:42.309 --> 00:36:44.900
and moving and loads of people have said amazing things
740
00:36:44.960 --> 00:36:48.099
about it is that not that like it's great to
741
00:36:48.139 --> 00:36:50.360
have the books by experts and the medical books and
742
00:36:50.380 --> 00:36:52.960
they're really important and have their place however you can't
743
00:36:53.000 --> 00:36:55.840
beat real life experience as someone that's living with it
744
00:36:56.340 --> 00:36:58.989
and can make it fun so it doesn't feel so
745
00:36:59.829 --> 00:37:03.929
stressful and difficult and like pressurized and i think that's
746
00:37:03.949 --> 00:37:05.829
what your book's very good at doing so don't play
747
00:37:05.849 --> 00:37:08.320
that down i think This is really important to have
748
00:37:08.340 --> 00:37:10.739
these kind of books written. Yeah, 100%. But that was
749
00:37:10.780 --> 00:37:11.139
the aim.
750
00:37:11.280 --> 00:37:14.460
So basically, I've written this book because this is the
751
00:37:14.480 --> 00:37:17.320
book I wish I'd read 16 years ago. Because 16
752
00:37:17.320 --> 00:37:21.260
years ago, when Adam was diagnosed, he was three. And
753
00:37:21.320 --> 00:37:24.480
I read quite a few books and stuff around it.
754
00:37:24.760 --> 00:37:27.690
And they were so bloody depressing. It was just awful.
755
00:37:28.690 --> 00:37:32.679
And I thought I wanted to write something that acknowledges
756
00:37:32.719 --> 00:37:37.000
all the challenges for sure but focuses on the joy
757
00:37:37.059 --> 00:37:41.119
in our house and talks about the lighter side and
758
00:37:41.449 --> 00:37:43.510
you know talks about the huge rewards.
759
00:37:43.130 --> 00:37:45.590
Did you when you first got the diagnosis what how
760
00:37:45.630 --> 00:37:48.269
did you feel like did you were you worried or
761
00:37:48.289 --> 00:37:51.130
were you or was it a relief in a way.
762
00:37:51.010 --> 00:37:54.150
Or no definitely the latter year so you know relief
763
00:37:54.210 --> 00:37:57.579
because it was like confirmation of Like, we're not just
764
00:37:57.639 --> 00:38:02.349
shit parents, genuinely. Like, because you've got a child who,
765
00:38:02.650 --> 00:38:06.789
it came up because we first got in, sought professional help,
766
00:38:07.150 --> 00:38:09.130
I think he was 18 months. He had a very
767
00:38:09.170 --> 00:38:13.610
restricted diet and severe speech delay. And, you know, you
768
00:38:13.690 --> 00:38:15.769
are just thinking, you're looking at the other kids at
769
00:38:15.829 --> 00:38:18.730
nursery and they're talking already and they're doing this and
770
00:38:18.750 --> 00:38:21.050
they're doing that. And you're thinking, oh my God, what
771
00:38:21.070 --> 00:38:23.849
have we done wrong? Are we just the world's crappiest parents?
772
00:38:24.469 --> 00:38:28.610
And to get that piece of paper, Yeah. I mean,
773
00:38:28.630 --> 00:38:30.849
not to say we're not shit parents. We might still be.
774
00:38:31.269 --> 00:38:32.250
That's just a coincidence.
775
00:38:32.489 --> 00:38:34.750
That might just be a coincidence. Exactly. And I think
776
00:38:34.789 --> 00:38:37.789
that's so important. It was so reassuring. Look, for some people,
777
00:38:37.829 --> 00:38:39.909
a diagnosis is like, oh, my God, this is just
778
00:38:39.949 --> 00:38:43.659
the worst thing ever. But that's how I felt. It
779
00:38:43.760 --> 00:38:46.409
felt like a relief, yeah, knowing what we're dealing with.
780
00:38:46.820 --> 00:38:50.800
Yeah. And do you have a vision of what kind
781
00:38:50.840 --> 00:38:53.900
of in 10 years' time or whatever, like how many
782
00:38:54.340 --> 00:38:56.789
do you think your kids at all, be out in
783
00:38:56.809 --> 00:38:59.800
the world and stuff or do you it's kind it's
784
00:38:59.820 --> 00:39:02.539
like more than it is for maybe me and Rob
785
00:39:02.840 --> 00:39:04.760
this is almost your life's work isn't it in a
786
00:39:04.780 --> 00:39:06.099
way do you know what I mean.
787
00:39:06.000 --> 00:39:09.690
Yeah no no I really it's I just don't know
788
00:39:09.750 --> 00:39:12.769
it's so hard to say So Adam, I think he
789
00:39:12.829 --> 00:39:15.989
actually wants to, he loves being on his own. He
790
00:39:16.030 --> 00:39:18.679
really wants to actually become a long distance lorry driver,
791
00:39:18.739 --> 00:39:19.219
if possible.
792
00:39:20.099 --> 00:39:20.659
Amazing.
793
00:39:20.760 --> 00:39:23.940
Genuinely. I think he likes walkie bars. Fine.
794
00:39:25.889 --> 00:39:29.369
Like swearing at people who cut him up in the traffic. Right, exactly.
795
00:39:29.409 --> 00:39:31.920
It's great. It's perfect for him. But he just, he likes,
796
00:39:31.940 --> 00:39:34.179
he's not very sociable. He likes being on his own.
797
00:39:34.940 --> 00:39:37.260
That's great. I can imagine him doing that. I think
798
00:39:38.079 --> 00:39:41.679
my third son, Dylan, he's an amazing character. I mean,
799
00:39:41.739 --> 00:39:46.010
he could talk bollocks for England. So he just, he,
800
00:39:46.289 --> 00:39:47.809
like the YouTube and.
801
00:39:47.769 --> 00:39:51.579
TikTok thing, Terrible inventions for someone like him because he
802
00:39:51.619 --> 00:39:54.920
just spent his whole life telling us about crap that.
803
00:39:54.840 --> 00:39:57.500
He's seen and what have you. And he's also done
804
00:39:57.679 --> 00:40:01.429
amazingly well. Like he he actually last year was on
805
00:40:01.449 --> 00:40:06.070
the year before a BBC show called Britain's Best Young Artist.
806
00:40:06.920 --> 00:40:10.099
And if you'd have told me 10 years before that,
807
00:40:10.460 --> 00:40:14.599
that he'd be able to be on network, on national
808
00:40:14.619 --> 00:40:18.730
TV and not a total twat of himself, it's amazing
809
00:40:18.789 --> 00:40:22.150
how they do change. So, you know what? I don't
810
00:40:22.190 --> 00:40:24.269
have a vision of what 10 years will be like
811
00:40:25.429 --> 00:40:28.030
into the future, but, you know, that's great. I'm kind
812
00:40:28.050 --> 00:40:29.429
of excited to see what happens.
813
00:40:29.949 --> 00:40:33.610
I think it's amazingly, it's such a great attitude and
814
00:40:33.630 --> 00:40:38.019
you're so like, so inspiring. Do you, is there a point,
815
00:40:38.119 --> 00:40:40.980
there must be points, well there might not be, but
816
00:40:41.420 --> 00:40:46.079
where you're just at home and it's six people and
817
00:40:46.119 --> 00:40:51.110
it's carnage and it's Saturday afternoon or whatever and you're like,
818
00:40:52.030 --> 00:40:56.630
you just think, fucking hell, it would be so easy
819
00:40:56.670 --> 00:40:59.230
just to have two Cold Plays in this situation?
820
00:40:59.610 --> 00:41:05.599
Oh, yeah, all the time.
821
00:41:05.619 --> 00:41:06.739
For sure.
822
00:41:06.960 --> 00:41:08.599
We all said when we were younger, we go, I
823
00:41:08.639 --> 00:41:10.739
didn't ask to be born, you know, but it's so
824
00:41:10.800 --> 00:41:12.780
true that, you know, like you don't ask to be born.
825
00:41:12.860 --> 00:41:16.929
And so you can't blame your kids for doing it yourself.
826
00:41:17.250 --> 00:41:19.860
But like my kids will sometimes say, they go to
827
00:41:19.889 --> 00:41:22.519
school with like people who've gone on holiday to Dubai
828
00:41:22.559 --> 00:41:23.739
or they've all gone there and whatever.
829
00:41:23.960 --> 00:41:25.579
And I go, well, I don't want to make you
830
00:41:25.599 --> 00:41:29.559
feel bad, but there's eight of us. That's, they've only
831
00:41:29.599 --> 00:41:32.239
got two kids and that's quite a lot for us to,
832
00:41:32.519 --> 00:41:34.539
you know, of course there are times where you think, God,
833
00:41:34.559 --> 00:41:36.559
if we only had two kids, we'd be able to
834
00:41:36.599 --> 00:41:37.679
do this, we'd be able to do that.
835
00:41:38.139 --> 00:41:42.480
But yeah, it's the pros and cons. There are so
836
00:41:42.519 --> 00:41:44.900
many pros that outweigh the cons. And we will sometimes
837
00:41:44.920 --> 00:41:47.519
just sit down and have a chaotic dinner.
838
00:41:47.699 --> 00:41:49.710
And I do stop and look around and just think,
839
00:41:49.929 --> 00:41:52.469
this is great. I love this. And I love how
840
00:41:52.489 --> 00:41:56.659
much they get on. And they've got this thing where
841
00:41:56.679 --> 00:41:59.000
they're all like, Often on a Friday night, they'll go
842
00:41:59.039 --> 00:42:02.699
out and get a pizza together. And it's just great.
843
00:42:02.760 --> 00:42:06.059
I really get such joy seeing how they get on.
844
00:42:06.320 --> 00:42:09.679
And did your wife have any autism or ADHD or
845
00:42:09.719 --> 00:42:12.929
anything like that? No, I don't think so, no. I mean, look,
846
00:42:13.210 --> 00:42:16.570
she does the real work. Can I say she's got
847
00:42:16.590 --> 00:42:18.630
an extra because there's an extra because of you're in
848
00:42:18.650 --> 00:42:21.380
the house as well. Right, exactly. With lots of people
849
00:42:21.389 --> 00:42:24.840
with different things going on. I'll be very clear.
850
00:42:25.119 --> 00:42:27.780
The dedication of the book says for Gemma, who does
851
00:42:27.840 --> 00:42:29.840
the real work, I just wrote a book about it.
852
00:42:30.280 --> 00:42:38.610
LAUGHTER I'm not going to try and lie and take credit.
853
00:42:38.630 --> 00:42:42.590
You know, she's amazing. She's actually a head teacher as well,
854
00:42:42.630 --> 00:42:43.519
so she has such a.
855
00:42:43.550 --> 00:42:44.510
Oh, wow.
856
00:42:44.809 --> 00:42:47.530
Yeah. So she has, like, a full-on job.
857
00:42:47.750 --> 00:42:51.130
There's so many questions, like, just practical questions that come
858
00:42:51.179 --> 00:42:55.440
into my head. Like, what's the food shop like?
859
00:42:55.619 --> 00:42:55.980
Yeah.
860
00:42:56.059 --> 00:42:59.539
Or, like, how do you stay on top of washing?
861
00:43:00.150 --> 00:43:03.110
Yeah. So the food, I mean, the food is a
862
00:43:03.130 --> 00:43:05.630
major issue, not just for the number of people, but
863
00:43:05.690 --> 00:43:09.619
for the additional needs, because we have so much like
864
00:43:09.800 --> 00:43:13.820
food sensitivities and stuff. Like I think I say in
865
00:43:13.840 --> 00:43:17.139
the book, like visits to the supermarket are preceded by
866
00:43:17.179 --> 00:43:20.639
a prayer that some new foods have been invented this week.
867
00:43:21.260 --> 00:43:25.829
Because like for Dylan, like any food has to be
868
00:43:26.030 --> 00:43:31.179
like completely white, right? food without any taste without any
869
00:43:31.440 --> 00:43:33.480
smell so what's.
870
00:43:32.760 --> 00:43:34.690
That rice milk.
871
00:43:35.949 --> 00:43:40.269
Yeah, I don't know. White bread. Yeah. Look, you're waiting
872
00:43:40.289 --> 00:43:46.579
for somebody to invent the taste-free, texture-free chicken, basically. I
873
00:43:46.599 --> 00:43:48.360
think Lou had a good go at it at the weekend,
874
00:43:48.380 --> 00:43:52.099
to be honest. Oh, that is good. That is a
875
00:43:52.139 --> 00:43:55.159
lazy bit of comedy. Lou actually did an excellent chicken.
876
00:43:55.179 --> 00:43:59.460
I apologise for that. No, it was good. Lou's actually
877
00:43:59.480 --> 00:44:01.340
up to game. She's got really good at cooking out
878
00:44:01.420 --> 00:44:04.500
of nowhere, to be honest. And she'd admit that. But yeah,
879
00:44:04.539 --> 00:44:07.340
sorry for the lazy comedy. Go on yourself. Lazy comedy
880
00:44:07.539 --> 00:44:08.460
is all I do.
881
00:44:13.619 --> 00:44:16.019
I don't think anyone's going to come away from this
882
00:44:16.400 --> 00:44:18.360
episode and go, I'll tell you the thing about that bloke,
883
00:44:18.409 --> 00:44:19.389
he was lazy, wasn't he?
884
00:44:19.389 --> 00:44:22.570
Not in parenting, just comedic.
885
00:44:22.610 --> 00:44:24.010
Yeah, just comedic.
886
00:44:24.730 --> 00:44:28.030
But, yeah, no, a lot of special needs children, a
887
00:44:28.070 --> 00:44:30.840
lot of parents, any listeners to this who've got kids
888
00:44:30.860 --> 00:44:32.699
with additional needs would recognise this.
889
00:44:34.420 --> 00:44:38.059
The food issues i know people who whose kids luckily
890
00:44:38.099 --> 00:44:40.219
my kids don't do this one but whose food has
891
00:44:40.260 --> 00:44:43.519
to be on the plate like separate they can't touch
892
00:44:43.949 --> 00:44:48.469
yeah just all kind of just issues regarding meals let's
893
00:44:48.489 --> 00:44:52.809
say um it was my eldest son's restricted diet which
894
00:44:52.869 --> 00:44:55.469
actually led to his diagnosis so yeah food is a
895
00:44:55.469 --> 00:44:57.579
real issue but practical issues i'll tell you like that
896
00:44:58.150 --> 00:44:58.590
here's a.
897
00:44:58.590 --> 00:45:00.130
Time where he, I was talking about going away. We
898
00:45:00.190 --> 00:45:04.969
did once all go to Greece some years ago. And so, yeah,
899
00:45:05.010 --> 00:45:05.980
so we went to Greece, but I.
900
00:45:05.940 --> 00:45:09.420
Was talking about like, uh, you know issues of flying
901
00:45:09.460 --> 00:45:13.179
and stuff so this this totally uh um totally true
902
00:45:13.260 --> 00:45:15.340
we we turn up and they go you can't come
903
00:45:15.380 --> 00:45:18.960
on the plane because you've got six kids and adults
904
00:45:19.000 --> 00:45:22.219
need to be sat next to them it's like there
905
00:45:22.239 --> 00:45:25.500
were only two adults the plane has to wait everyone
906
00:45:25.519 --> 00:45:27.920
has to get everyone on board and then we'll try
907
00:45:27.940 --> 00:45:29.840
and work it out so we come on board people
908
00:45:29.860 --> 00:45:32.139
are tutting as we're getting on board can i ask.
909
00:45:31.989 --> 00:45:34.590
A question on this sorry but Should it not flag
910
00:45:34.690 --> 00:45:36.969
it when you buy the tickets if they're going to
911
00:45:36.989 --> 00:45:37.989
flag it at the airport?
912
00:45:38.510 --> 00:45:41.469
Quite, exactly. So they come on board. We go on board, right?
913
00:45:41.829 --> 00:45:45.929
And they say, we've got this situation. Would somebody move
914
00:45:46.230 --> 00:45:50.940
to sit with these three children, right? And people are like, oh.
915
00:45:51.079 --> 00:45:52.599
We're like, God, this is never going to take off.
916
00:45:52.920 --> 00:45:55.739
So this young guy, he's in his early 20s, gets
917
00:45:55.860 --> 00:45:57.099
up and goes, yeah, I'll sit with them, right?
918
00:45:57.519 --> 00:45:58.119
Legend.
919
00:45:58.400 --> 00:46:00.659
Yeah. It was with his family.
920
00:46:00.800 --> 00:46:05.269
They were from L.A., and they'd been in London for
921
00:46:05.309 --> 00:46:07.349
a week, and now they were flying on to Greece
922
00:46:07.670 --> 00:46:10.969
for an extra part of their vacation. And I think
923
00:46:11.010 --> 00:46:12.989
he thought he was going to have a kip on
924
00:46:13.030 --> 00:46:15.630
the plane, right? But he sits down next to my sons,
925
00:46:15.650 --> 00:46:18.590
and I say to them, look, behave. I said to him,
926
00:46:18.639 --> 00:46:21.800
don't worry. They've got screens. You don't have to do anything.
927
00:46:21.920 --> 00:46:26.900
But my Dylan, who, as I say, he just can
928
00:46:26.960 --> 00:46:31.139
talk shit for England, he says to this guy, like,
929
00:46:31.550 --> 00:46:33.800
Where are you from? And he goes, L.A. And he
930
00:46:33.929 --> 00:46:38.099
just kind of goes, ooh, Hollywood. And he basically spoke
931
00:46:38.119 --> 00:46:43.199
to this guy nonstop for four hours. Oh, God. He
932
00:46:43.320 --> 00:46:46.559
made them. And I remember Dylan said to him, do
933
00:46:46.599 --> 00:46:50.260
you like The Simpsons? And this idiot, instead of saying no,
934
00:46:50.860 --> 00:46:56.659
said yes. And what followed was an inquisition of favorite episode,
935
00:46:56.699 --> 00:46:58.840
favorite cameo, least favorite episode.
936
00:46:59.760 --> 00:47:04.239
At one point, I heard Dylan performing the entire episode,
937
00:47:04.300 --> 00:47:05.739
Home of the Great, and.
938
00:47:05.739 --> 00:47:07.019
Singing the song.
939
00:47:08.679 --> 00:47:13.010
You didn't think you should step in at this point?
940
00:47:13.340 --> 00:47:15.050
Well, there's nothing I could do. I had to stay
941
00:47:15.090 --> 00:47:18.889
in my seat. I would say within the four hours,
942
00:47:18.909 --> 00:47:20.949
you could have popped up for a bit and gone, Dylan, mate,
943
00:47:20.969 --> 00:47:24.309
calm down on the scenes as well. Every time I
944
00:47:24.449 --> 00:47:27.719
went back to check on him, I just heard him saying,
945
00:47:28.159 --> 00:47:30.119
You know, have you seen the Star Wars holiday special?
946
00:47:30.480 --> 00:47:36.280
Have you seen Adam West? Who's your favourite Spider-Man villain?
947
00:47:36.639 --> 00:47:38.849
And when the plane landed, this bloke, he didn't even
948
00:47:38.889 --> 00:47:41.030
wait for the seatbelt sign to go off. He was up,
949
00:47:41.090 --> 00:47:45.070
he was out. He looked at me like, I want
950
00:47:45.090 --> 00:47:47.719
to kill you. And I said, look, mate, I've got
951
00:47:47.739 --> 00:47:51.199
to live with him. You've only been there four hours.
952
00:47:51.400 --> 00:47:53.539
Is that why you've put on a UK tour? So
953
00:47:53.659 --> 00:47:56.920
you can have a bit of space? Exactly, of course. Actually,
954
00:47:57.090 --> 00:47:58.550
I'll go through the dates for people that want to
955
00:47:58.590 --> 00:47:59.989
come and see. You can buy the book.
956
00:48:00.130 --> 00:48:02.489
This is a bit poignant going through the dates, isn't it, Rob?
957
00:48:02.909 --> 00:48:05.150
Oh, it's Steve Wright, because this is the poor old
958
00:48:05.210 --> 00:48:07.469
Steve Wright passed away. Rest in peace. We love Steve
959
00:48:07.510 --> 00:48:09.719
Wright here at Parenting Health. And this was his thing,
960
00:48:09.760 --> 00:48:12.610
wasn't it? So in honour of Steve Wright, here's all
961
00:48:12.679 --> 00:48:17.070
your gigs listed out. So you've got Guildford G Live,
962
00:48:17.130 --> 00:48:21.230
Hemel Hempstead, Old Town Hall, Radlett Centre, Didcock Cornerstone Arts Centre,
963
00:48:21.650 --> 00:48:26.630
Winchester Theatre Royal, then into May, Birmingham MAC, Swindon Arts Centre,
964
00:48:26.690 --> 00:48:29.309
Whole Social, Salford Lowry, Salford Lowry, always get it wrong,
965
00:48:29.389 --> 00:48:34.780
Leeds Carriageworks, then June, Colchester, London, Exeter, Brighton, Milton Keynes,
966
00:48:34.840 --> 00:48:38.500
more dates to be added. Good luck with it, Ashley.
967
00:48:38.760 --> 00:48:40.179
Thank you.
968
00:48:40.199 --> 00:48:47.030
Can they follow you on Instagram? AshleyBlaker.com B-L-A-K-E-R and Instagram, etc.
969
00:48:47.960 --> 00:48:51.000
Oh, yeah, the Ashley Blake on Instagram. And I'm not
970
00:48:51.019 --> 00:48:54.840
a massive social media user, in fairness, but they, yes.
971
00:48:54.880 --> 00:48:59.010
Why are you not dedicating more time to your Instagram, Ashley?
972
00:48:59.610 --> 00:49:04.090
Well, lazy sod you are. Yeah.
973
00:49:04.329 --> 00:49:06.269
There's a photo on your website of you with your
974
00:49:06.369 --> 00:49:09.989
six children, this lovely photo. And I wonder what that
975
00:49:10.429 --> 00:49:11.510
photo shoot was like.
976
00:49:11.550 --> 00:49:11.780
Did you.
977
00:49:12.199 --> 00:49:14.179
have to take them all to a photo shoot studio
978
00:49:14.260 --> 00:49:15.679
and stuff, or is that just a photo?
979
00:49:16.199 --> 00:49:19.280
No, so that was, yes steve ullathorne you might yeah
980
00:49:19.539 --> 00:49:23.780
yeah of course very good photographer of comedians and um
981
00:49:24.059 --> 00:49:26.599
well so basically everything and obviously the cover of he
982
00:49:26.860 --> 00:49:29.260
took the photos on the cover of the book and
983
00:49:29.760 --> 00:49:32.619
all those photos so he basically in the things that
984
00:49:32.679 --> 00:49:37.010
involves my children involves the most extraordinary amount of bribery
985
00:49:38.139 --> 00:49:41.599
The advance I got for this book, most of it
986
00:49:41.659 --> 00:49:46.380
went on bribes to be on the cover, to be,
987
00:49:46.400 --> 00:49:48.590
the book was serialized in the Sunday Times. They came
988
00:49:48.619 --> 00:49:51.369
and did a photo shoot. And again, that involved a
989
00:49:51.429 --> 00:49:55.389
huge amount of bribery. So yeah, everything has got a price.
990
00:49:55.590 --> 00:49:59.449
That's what I find in our house. They're very good negotiators. Actually,
991
00:49:59.469 --> 00:50:00.369
they should be my agent.
992
00:50:00.409 --> 00:50:05.530
What do they normally ask for? It's usually food-related.
993
00:50:06.030 --> 00:50:06.329
Right.
994
00:50:06.769 --> 00:50:09.929
But cash as well. Cash as well. Yeah.
995
00:50:10.170 --> 00:50:13.750
And I've also got a Radio 4 series called Ashley
996
00:50:13.769 --> 00:50:16.880
Blake's 6.5 Children, and they appear as themselves.
997
00:50:17.659 --> 00:50:20.119
Right. We did two series of that. Is it like
998
00:50:20.159 --> 00:50:27.239
a sitcom? It's stand-up with bits in the house. Right, okay.
999
00:50:27.280 --> 00:50:30.739
And they appear as themselves. And again, like that required
1000
00:50:30.900 --> 00:50:33.539
a lot of, rightly so, they should be paid for
1001
00:50:33.559 --> 00:50:36.460
their work. But the amazing thing is, right, Zoe, right,
1002
00:50:36.480 --> 00:50:38.619
she's got Down syndrome, mental age of a two-year-old, what
1003
00:50:38.639 --> 00:50:41.519
have you. She's actually got her own page on the
1004
00:50:41.559 --> 00:50:46.739
British Comedy Guide. That's right. She's actually got, there is some,
1005
00:50:47.320 --> 00:50:50.889
you know, that stand-up comics on the circuit who have
1006
00:50:50.909 --> 00:50:56.400
got fewer credits. Yeah. Yeah. Well, with Dancing Dome. So
1007
00:50:56.420 --> 00:50:58.980
that is, I love that. I absolutely love that. You've
1008
00:50:59.179 --> 00:51:02.889
got two series credits on the British Comedy Guide. Brilliant.
1009
00:51:02.989 --> 00:51:04.670
There'll be some comedians I can think of that'll be
1010
00:51:04.710 --> 00:51:05.690
very bitter about that.
1011
00:51:05.909 --> 00:51:08.710
Yeah. Oh, shall we do the final question, Josh?
1012
00:51:08.750 --> 00:51:09.289
Oh, yes.
1013
00:51:09.389 --> 00:51:09.670
Yeah.
1014
00:51:10.110 --> 00:51:12.289
We always end with the same question, which is what
1015
00:51:12.389 --> 00:51:16.719
one thing does your wife do that is kind of
1016
00:51:17.000 --> 00:51:20.420
blows you away, the parenting that you just couldn't manage yourself,
1017
00:51:20.480 --> 00:51:23.699
that you're just in awe of? More importantly to us,
1018
00:51:23.960 --> 00:51:25.679
what one thing does she do that annoys you but
1019
00:51:25.699 --> 00:51:28.130
you haven't had the guts to say? But if she
1020
00:51:28.150 --> 00:51:31.250
were to listen to this, then this is your way
1021
00:51:31.329 --> 00:51:33.090
to tell her not to do that.
1022
00:51:33.530 --> 00:51:35.230
Yeah, well, the first part is easy because, as I say,
1023
00:51:35.369 --> 00:51:38.800
I've already said, like, she does everything. So, you know,
1024
00:51:41.139 --> 00:51:44.500
the amazing people my children have become is solely down
1025
00:51:44.519 --> 00:51:47.760
to her. I will only take credit for their flaws.
1026
00:51:48.300 --> 00:51:50.380
So that's for sure.
1027
00:51:50.639 --> 00:51:52.340
And how she does it with being a head teacher
1028
00:51:52.380 --> 00:51:55.579
as well, I don't know. In terms of the latter part, oh,
1029
00:51:55.619 --> 00:51:56.059
that's harder.
1030
00:51:56.099 --> 00:51:56.719
But I think.
1031
00:51:58.440 --> 00:52:03.340
One thing I will say, she hates football. And my
1032
00:52:03.409 --> 00:52:06.329
eldest two are like Liverpool obsessives as well. And I
1033
00:52:06.429 --> 00:52:09.710
think she just needs to. understand there are times you
1034
00:52:09.769 --> 00:52:11.630
can't speak to us. There are times that we're too
1035
00:52:11.710 --> 00:52:15.349
sad to talk. There are times where you can't interrupt. And,
1036
00:52:15.590 --> 00:52:18.630
you know, so apologies again to listeners who aren't interested
1037
00:52:18.650 --> 00:52:23.719
in football, but Jurgen Klopp, Liverpool's manager, my life, recently
1038
00:52:23.840 --> 00:52:29.099
announced he was leaving Liverpool. And our house was like
1039
00:52:29.139 --> 00:52:33.570
someone had died, genuinely. And Jeremy just came up to
1040
00:52:33.650 --> 00:52:36.539
me and said, I don't understand. Why are people so
1041
00:52:36.579 --> 00:52:38.780
upset about Gerard Houllier retiring?
1042
00:52:39.130 --> 00:52:42.030
No, no, no. He died four years ago. I don't
1043
00:52:42.050 --> 00:52:43.429
know where you got this from.
1044
00:52:44.079 --> 00:52:45.780
You've got a tattoo of him on your leg.
1045
00:52:46.449 --> 00:52:49.150
I know, and yet that's how little interest she has.
1046
00:52:49.190 --> 00:52:50.949
You've got a lot of tattoos, though, actually. I've just
1047
00:52:50.989 --> 00:52:53.190
done a look online. You're covered in them. You look
1048
00:52:53.230 --> 00:52:56.050
like a cage fire. Exactly. I just want to be.
1049
00:52:56.250 --> 00:52:59.150
I do have the world's least... They are the least
1050
00:52:59.210 --> 00:53:00.139
macho tattoos.
1051
00:53:00.900 --> 00:53:03.340
I would say, you know, the photos I've seen of
1052
00:53:03.380 --> 00:53:06.739
you with... I haven't looked at your tattoo photos, but
1053
00:53:06.780 --> 00:53:09.039
I'd say you don't look like someone who's going to
1054
00:53:09.079 --> 00:53:11.199
produce a load of tattoos. Do you know what I mean?
1055
00:53:11.480 --> 00:53:14.530
Yeah, yeah. I did... I was on... what show is it?
1056
00:53:14.659 --> 00:53:18.380
Ricky Wilson, you know, the, the, uh, Kaiser radio show.
1057
00:53:18.400 --> 00:53:20.300
And he said that he, and I was, it was
1058
00:53:20.340 --> 00:53:22.179
in the summer. I was wearing a t-shirt and he said,
1059
00:53:22.300 --> 00:53:25.480
it looks like your head has been photoshopped onto your body.
1060
00:53:27.840 --> 00:53:30.199
And yeah, there is none of that. They are. Yeah.
1061
00:53:30.219 --> 00:53:33.050
I don't know. Quite a few football related. Um, I
1062
00:53:33.090 --> 00:53:38.329
have the words corner taken quickly. A reiki demo. I've, uh, uh,
1063
00:53:38.389 --> 00:53:41.110
Roberto for Mina. Um, but yes, there's a lot of
1064
00:53:41.170 --> 00:53:42.650
like silly, very colorful.
1065
00:53:43.210 --> 00:53:47.110
Um, Well, it's a pleasure to speak to you. Thanks
1066
00:53:47.170 --> 00:53:49.929
so much. The book is out in paperback.
1067
00:53:50.070 --> 00:53:51.820
Do I want to say?
1068
00:53:51.889 --> 00:53:54.860
Yeah, so Normal Small is out in hardback at the moment.
1069
00:53:55.519 --> 00:53:59.719
Paperback is in July. Don't wait for that, though. Get
1070
00:53:59.760 --> 00:54:01.679
the hardback and the paperback, obviously.
1071
00:54:01.820 --> 00:54:07.489
Double. Exactly, get both. And then the tour starts in April. Brilliant. Well,
1072
00:54:07.510 --> 00:54:08.230
good luck with it, mate.
1073
00:54:08.289 --> 00:54:09.590
Thanks so much, Ashley.
1074
00:54:09.750 --> 00:54:10.329
Cheers, Ashley.
1075
00:54:14.769 --> 00:54:18.389
Love comedy, love gossip, you're in luck. Check out the
1076
00:54:18.590 --> 00:54:22.769
Always Be Comedy podcast, where you'll find top-tier chats with
1077
00:54:22.789 --> 00:54:28.519
the likes of Stephen Merchant, Romesh Ranganathan, Maisie Adam, Rose Matafayo,
1078
00:54:28.880 --> 00:54:32.800
Josh Widdicombe, Stuart Lee, and many more. That's the Always
1079
00:54:32.860 --> 00:54:36.480
Be Comedy podcast with Tim Lewis and me, James Gill,
1080
00:54:36.860 --> 00:54:40.949
available everywhere you get podcasts. And if you're a fan
1081
00:54:40.969 --> 00:54:44.239
of Parenting Hell, and in particular, Producer Michael, He's the
1082
00:54:44.280 --> 00:54:48.610
guest on this week's Always Be Comedy bonus podcast episode.