S7 EP22: Nick Frost

WEBVTT
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Hello i'm rob beckett and i'm josh willicombe welcome to
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parents in hell the show in which josh and i
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discuss what it's really like to be a parent which
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i would say can be a little tricky.
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So to make ourselves and hopefully you feel better about
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the trials and tribulations of modern day parenting each week
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we're chatting to a famous parent about how they're.
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Coping or hopefully how they're not coping.
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And we'll also be hearing from you the listener with
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your tips advice and of course tales of parenting.
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Woe because let's be honest there are plenty of times
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where none of us know what we're doing Hello, you're
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listening to Parenting Hell with.
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Hi, Emmy. Can you say Rob Beckett?
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No.
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Why not?
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Because it's too hard because I can't talk to say
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Uncle Adam's name.
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OK, so Uncle Adam, and can you say Josh Widdicombe? Ah,
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that's my name!
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It's too long, isn't it? Yeah.
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Can you say Stiff Neck? Stiff Neck.
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Nice.
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There you go. Did you recognise that voice, Rob?
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I recognised the little giggle of the dad as Tom Packman,
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a man we both know.
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Yes.
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Who now lives in New York and he worked in
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comedy and he did my tour managing for a bit.
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Lovely guy.
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Lovely bloke. This is his daughter, Emmy.
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Lovely guy, Tom. From Gravesend. Went to school with Gemma Arterton.
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He did. He used to be in a band with
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Hannah Arterton, who is her sister.
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He's getting a real lug. He runs New York comedy
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festivals now, I think.
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It's a tricky one to pin down the location as
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I'm from the UK, but now live in New York
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with her.
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She's very New York, his daughter.
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His daughter couldn't sound more American.
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Come on already, pa. I can't do that. I can
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only do one quantum. Is there a coffee wheel here?
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I'm not sure that's what it's called.
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Come on, stop the sidewalk. What do you think, Josh?
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I think it's awful.
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I've got a self-tape later. I want to get a
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job at NYPD Blue.
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You're nailed on, mate. I've never known anyone more nailed
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on for a job in my life. What, your other
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range of accents?
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Oh, anything you want, mate. Just fire them at me.
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Okay, Chinese?
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Ooh.
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Thank you, Tom, for that voice. Nick Frost today. Exciting,
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isn't it? Very exciting.
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Big fan of Nick Frost. He's got kids. He's got
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a book out about cooking. And I want to ask
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him about something, Josh.
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Oh, go on.
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I like it when we do this.
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I've done some prep.
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You've done some prep?
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Well, after Ed Balls.
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You've decided to find out who it is this time?
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No, but Michael sent me an email and it's got
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a blurb about Nick Frost's book.
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Oh, I didn't get that email, did I?
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Ah, here we go. Here we go. Another clue.
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Oh, yeah, here we go.
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But he says that he loves food and he wants
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his kids to have a good relationship with food. like
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waking up to the smell of fresh bread and stuff.
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But it also says he will wear a helmet when
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he cooks so he doesn't have to listen to the kids. Now,
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I want to ask him about this because I put
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headphones on and listen to a podcast when I'm cooking
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so I can concentrate and when I'm, like, tidying up
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and doing the dishwasher because I get it done quicker.
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But I don't know if that's mean.
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Yes.
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If they're actively talking to me, I will talk back
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to them. I can take my AirPods out.
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So when I cook, I have a podcast or audio
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book on or the radio, but I'll have them out loud.
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What was the podcast?
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Well, it's normally swearing in it or about boxing. They
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don't hear that.
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They've already got the football on the telly that they
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don't want to watch.
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Well, we've got like a kitchen living area sort of thing.
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Like there's a sofa in the kitchen. That's where they
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watch telly because we've got a living room that's nicer,
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that's sort of for evenings and special. So they're normally
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in there. So if I've got a podcast, I'm going
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to be like competing with their cartoons.
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Right.
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Yeah, yeah, yeah.
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Of course.
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Of course. Fair enough. That's the issue there. Have we
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got anything else we're going to ask? I quite like
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this new thing we do when we discuss the interview beforehand.
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I was thinking about this. I think we should tell
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people what they do rather than just say their names.
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Okay.
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Because I was listening to a podcast the other day
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and they were talking about someone and I sort of
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half knew them and then they listed the other stuff
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they'd done. And I was like, oh, that's really helped
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me place them and has made this interview more interesting.
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And I thought, yeah, maybe that's what we should do
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rather than just going, hello, Nick Frost, and then just
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talking about them.
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Yeah, but I don't think you want to do it
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when they're there because I hate that when I'm being interviewed.
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Do you know what I mean?
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I would too if I had your CV.
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Oh, that is great gear. That is good gear. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
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So when you have to sit there for the first
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bit and they go, he's a legend of stage and screen.
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Oh, yeah, that's horrible.
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So I think we could just say Nick Frost, he
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was in Spaced. Interestingly, like he was just a waiter,
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not just a waiter, but he wasn't a trained actor.
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He was just Simon Pegg's mate who he'd worked with
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in a restaurant. And then he got a role in Spaced.
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And then it's all gone on. He's done Shaun of
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the Dead. He's done Hot Fuzz. He's then gone to Hollywood.
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I think Steven Spielberg described him as like the greatest
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comic actor he's ever worked with or something like that.
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Lovely stuff. I really liked him in Fighting With My Family.
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Yeah, the Stephen Merchant film.
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Yeah, about the wrestling family from like Norfolk. Also, I
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just had a quick look online and it says that
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he's in Supernanny. Is Joe Frost one of his characters?
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LAUGHTER I just.
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Don't know why, because I've gone on Superdown and it
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just says Joe Frost and Nick Frost. Are they like
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siblings or partners? Is that his wife? I haven't done
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enough research.
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Try and work it out.
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Try and work it out. Try and work it out, Rob.
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While you're doing it, try and work it out.
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Drop it in. This is the good thing about us
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discussing beforehand, that you could ask him. Because it's a
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perfect parenting question. You could say, do you have a
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naughty step? And then you'll know whether he is Joe Frost.
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I will ask him, why he wears a helmet when
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he's cooking? And are you Joe Frost?
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Are you Joe Frost?
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Those are two questions.
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I'm looking forward to this now. Not that I wasn't anyway.
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Fucking hell, that was a bad slip of the tongue. No,
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I'm looking forward to this.
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You're a bit overworked, Josh.
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I'm a bit overworked.
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You need less on your plate. I'm actually happy to
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just let this run for a couple of hours. I've
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got time.
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Yeah, what are you going to do with your afternoon?
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I forgot.
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Breathe.
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Time to breathe. I'm going to walk the dogs and
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I've got to sort the house out.
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Oh, God.
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Everyone's got to sort the house out. We've got big
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sorting the house out discussions. We're going to have to
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get some more storage put in, Rob.
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Storage put in the house? Why don't you just move?
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Because we love where we live.
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Can I say something as a friend?
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No, Rob, not everyone wants to live... No, no, no, no, no, no.
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Not the countryside.
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You're so obsessed with where I live.
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I think for the lifestyle you have and what you
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and Rose and the kids like to do, I think
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you should stay where you are. I think you should
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stay in Victoria Park. That's what you like.
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People are different. People are wrong.
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But you enjoy being wrong. That's fine.
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So you live there.
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It's great for you and your decisions. However, I think
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you should stay in Zone 2, wherever it is you are.
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But I think you need more space and a bigger
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garden because when the kids get older, the kids want
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to play football and play in the garden. It is
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so lovely to have more space because we had a
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garden similar size to yours. Then we moved and it's
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a game changer. You can have so much more fun
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and time at home. If you're in a lucky enough
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position to move.
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They don't exist in Zone 2, Rob. They don't exist
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in Zone 2. I'm just saying. They don't exist in
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Victoria Park.
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Yeah, but you're already saying you need storage.
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Yeah, we just need a bit of storage. What is storage?
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It's space, isn't it?
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I haven't even used the word garden. And you're obsessed
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with your big garden.
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No, but I'm just saying as your kids get older.
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They're going to be less interested in the garden. They're
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going to be out taking crack.
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They're going to get bigger. They're going to need more
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space for their things. You can have potentially four bikes
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in the front.
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Rob, Rose is never riding a fucking bike. Okay, two bikes.
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But I'm just saying, where are you going to put
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the storage? Like built-in cupboard somewhere?
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Yeah.
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But where? In the kitchen.
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Right.
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You're going to extend the kitchen?
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No, it's a big old kitchen, Rob. Don't have a
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go at the size of my kitchen.
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No, I thought you were changing the kitchen a few
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weeks ago.
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Oh, yeah, we are, we are, we are.
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So how are you having a go at me?
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You're changing the kitchen.
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Oh, you're not extending it, though. You're just redesigning it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
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I genuinely, I think, This is my prediction, okay, and
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we will pan out because we will be doing this
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in a few years' time, not even just because we're
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contractually obliged to. We like it. You will get the
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storage of the kitchen, redo the kitchen. I reckon within
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five years you'll move house.
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I don't think we will.
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I think you know you will.
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I think I know we won't. I don't think we will.
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This is Nick Frost.
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Do you.
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Want me to do a quick parenting tip before we
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move on?
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Yeah, yeah, if you want to do a parenting tip.
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Yeah, there we go. All right.
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Dear Rob and Josh, I've got two girls, Ella, 15,
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and 14. We moved recently. We wish we'd done it sooner.
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It's been a nightmare having teenagers in a smaller house.
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We haven't got a small house! Even though we thought
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storage would solve all our problems. You haven't got a
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small house, but you could get more space, I think. Anyway,
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I've got two girls, Ella, 15 and 14. Evie was
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a nightmare sleeper, which didn't really... I just.
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Don't agree with storage. When someone buys a cupboard, you
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don't go, you need to move house.
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No, but it's like the entry drug. It's like smoking
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pot before heroin.
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I'm thinking of getting some cupboards put in. Do you
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know where you should go for cupboards? Foxton's, because you need.
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A new house.
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No, but I would say, you know, if you've got
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enough space for all your stuff, the word storage doesn't
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get brought up.
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00:09:14.210 --> 00:09:16.070
We haven't got enough storage space.
255
00:09:16.169 --> 00:09:18.769
You either need to just have less things or move.
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00:09:19.409 --> 00:09:20.029
No, you don't.
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That's what I'm saying.
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What are you saying? You haven't got enough space for
259
00:09:24.830 --> 00:09:26.600
all the stuff and you're going to need more stuff.
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00:09:27.190 --> 00:09:27.830
No, we have.
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00:09:27.850 --> 00:09:29.029
We just haven't got enough storage.
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00:09:29.049 --> 00:09:31.289
We haven't got enough space for it now. We've got
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00:09:31.309 --> 00:09:33.669
a baby, essentially. He's only two when he starts having
264
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things and growing up.
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00:09:35.009 --> 00:09:37.200
He's got things now. He's got fucking things now, mate.
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I'll tell you that for free.
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00:09:38.480 --> 00:09:40.000
My daughter came home from school the other day with
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00:09:40.009 --> 00:09:42.220
a guitar and a flute. Where are you putting that
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00:09:42.259 --> 00:09:42.639
in the week?
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00:09:43.019 --> 00:09:46.419
What, in the guitar stand? The flutes are tiny. Yeah,
271
00:09:46.440 --> 00:09:48.740
but then they get bigger. How big's your flute?
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00:09:48.779 --> 00:09:49.559
Shoes get bigger.
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00:09:49.600 --> 00:09:51.399
Why did you move to the country? Because we didn't
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00:09:51.419 --> 00:09:52.320
have room for a flute?
275
00:09:52.440 --> 00:09:54.019
Your shoe cupboard at the moment, or wherever you're keeping
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00:09:54.039 --> 00:09:56.600
your shoes, right? Fine, isn't it? Those tiny little feet.
277
00:09:56.909 --> 00:09:59.350
Wait until your boy gets his old big size 9
278
00:09:59.350 --> 00:10:01.940
and 10s. man living in your house. Have you seen
279
00:10:01.980 --> 00:10:03.840
the size of me and Rose? Let me put it
280
00:10:03.860 --> 00:10:07.269
like this, Josh. The house you're in now, okay? Imagine
281
00:10:07.289 --> 00:10:08.600
if another couple moved in.
282
00:10:08.899 --> 00:10:09.620
Well, I don't want that.
283
00:10:09.639 --> 00:10:10.299
You didn't have kids.
284
00:10:10.360 --> 00:10:12.029
Well, I don't want another couple to move in with us.
285
00:10:12.080 --> 00:10:14.120
No, but I'm just saying, that's what's going to happen
286
00:10:14.139 --> 00:10:16.519
because they'll grow up and there's another two adults living there.
287
00:10:16.659 --> 00:10:19.200
I'm going to say it now. There's no way that
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00:10:19.220 --> 00:10:21.039
my daughter could have more stuff than she's got at
289
00:10:21.059 --> 00:10:21.480
the moment.
290
00:10:21.500 --> 00:10:23.279
Yes, she will, and it'll be bigger.
291
00:10:23.460 --> 00:10:23.659
No.
292
00:10:24.259 --> 00:10:25.019
It will. No.
293
00:10:25.039 --> 00:10:25.659
It's going to grow.
294
00:10:26.139 --> 00:10:29.240
And if you're struggling now with space, you wait till
295
00:10:29.259 --> 00:10:30.059
they're 15, 16.
296
00:10:30.059 --> 00:10:33.299
We're not struggling with space at all. We're not struggling
297
00:10:33.320 --> 00:10:33.899
with space.
298
00:10:34.570 --> 00:10:34.870
Just saying.
299
00:10:35.240 --> 00:10:38.299
But we're not struggling with space. They're yours words. I'll
300
00:10:38.320 --> 00:10:40.320
bet you 100 quid. Tell you what I'll bet you.
301
00:10:40.639 --> 00:10:41.259
Stamp duty.
302
00:10:41.500 --> 00:10:46.970
Fuck off. Not on zone two. Not doing that. You
303
00:10:46.990 --> 00:10:50.950
got on telly before me. Anyway, I've got two girls, Ella, 15,
304
00:10:50.950 --> 00:10:53.409
and Evie, 14. Evie was a nightmare sleeper and didn't
305
00:10:53.470 --> 00:10:56.169
really sleep properly for about five years. When they were little,
306
00:10:56.250 --> 00:10:58.250
we would read them bedtime stories and act out all
307
00:10:58.269 --> 00:11:00.049
the parts and really get into it. The trouble was,
308
00:11:00.309 --> 00:11:02.570
it just kept them awake for longer. I realised that
309
00:11:02.590 --> 00:11:04.600
when you're telling them a story... You need to get
310
00:11:04.679 --> 00:11:07.639
less and less animated as you tell it. Eventually, your
311
00:11:07.679 --> 00:11:10.539
voice needs to be totally flat and boring. The monotone
312
00:11:10.559 --> 00:11:13.179
delivery will have them asleep much, much quicker. Trust me,
313
00:11:13.279 --> 00:11:13.750
it works.
314
00:11:14.000 --> 00:11:16.179
Well, that is a good tip. That is a good tip.
315
00:11:16.570 --> 00:11:18.610
Cheers, fellas. Keep up the good work. You crack us up.
316
00:11:18.889 --> 00:11:22.649
Josh's kitchen breakdown episode should win an award. This is
317
00:11:22.669 --> 00:11:23.370
from Steve.
318
00:11:23.950 --> 00:11:24.309
P.S.
319
00:11:24.450 --> 00:11:26.350
Rob, can you say hello to my wife, Joss? She's
320
00:11:26.370 --> 00:11:30.210
your biggest fan. Hi, Joss. That's a good tip, that is.
321
00:11:30.669 --> 00:11:30.909
Right.
322
00:11:31.169 --> 00:11:31.970
Should we bring on Nick Frost?
323
00:11:32.470 --> 00:11:32.789
Yeah.
324
00:11:32.950 --> 00:11:34.330
Send you a couple of links on Rightmove I've seen
325
00:11:34.350 --> 00:11:34.570
for you.
326
00:11:34.889 --> 00:11:35.889
Oh, for fuck's sake.
327
00:11:35.909 --> 00:11:39.649
Do you want to do the intro, Josh, or shall I?
328
00:11:40.460 --> 00:11:42.620
Well, it's very simple, isn't it? Nick Frost, hello.
329
00:11:43.779 --> 00:11:44.200
Hello.
330
00:11:44.379 --> 00:11:45.159
That was amazing.
331
00:11:45.360 --> 00:11:46.620
Yeah.
332
00:11:46.639 --> 00:11:49.559
Well, we find it awkward doing intros and being on
333
00:11:49.580 --> 00:11:51.080
the end of them when they sort of list things
334
00:11:51.100 --> 00:11:54.039
you've done or describe you in a full-on way. We
335
00:11:54.059 --> 00:11:56.059
find it a bit awkward and cringe. How do you
336
00:11:56.100 --> 00:11:57.179
feel about intros, Nick?
337
00:11:57.179 --> 00:12:00.639
100% feel the same way. Just that my name was enough,
338
00:12:00.710 --> 00:12:01.120
it was great.
339
00:12:01.830 --> 00:12:02.230
Perfect.
340
00:12:02.250 --> 00:12:02.549
Look at that.
341
00:12:02.570 --> 00:12:04.669
We're flying already. Nick, how many kids have you got?
342
00:12:04.700 --> 00:12:06.179
Can you let us know the setup at home? What's
343
00:12:06.200 --> 00:12:07.460
the deal? And their ages?
344
00:12:07.759 --> 00:12:10.259
Okay. Well, I've got three that I know about.
345
00:12:10.799 --> 00:12:11.820
Legend.
346
00:12:12.659 --> 00:12:17.200
I've got an older son with my first wife, who's 12.
347
00:12:17.200 --> 00:12:20.620
And then I've got two lovely little children who are
348
00:12:20.720 --> 00:12:25.399
two and five with my... Is the word current... Current
349
00:12:25.419 --> 00:12:28.559
seems weird because there's kind of scope for another.
350
00:12:29.879 --> 00:12:31.360
Yeah.
351
00:12:31.440 --> 00:12:32.639
Second?
352
00:12:33.159 --> 00:12:35.330
Keep her on her toes, Nick. Keep her on her toes.
353
00:12:35.350 --> 00:12:37.889
Second implies it's going to be a three or four.
354
00:12:38.429 --> 00:12:40.070
I'm only 51. Fuck it.
355
00:12:43.610 --> 00:12:47.049
I should just also point out that your first son
356
00:12:47.110 --> 00:12:49.970
is 12 because the phrasing did sound like with my
357
00:12:50.029 --> 00:12:52.919
first wife, who is 12. For a moment, I was like, well,
358
00:12:52.960 --> 00:12:55.500
this is a scoop. If your first wife is 12 currently,
359
00:12:55.519 --> 00:12:57.269
then we're in real trouble with this child.
360
00:12:57.309 --> 00:13:00.970
We were together for 15 years as well, so... Yeah,
361
00:13:01.090 --> 00:13:03.889
it's the child who's 12.
362
00:13:03.889 --> 00:13:06.929
So you've got really little ones that are mental and non-stop,
363
00:13:06.960 --> 00:13:08.600
and then you've got one sort of probably becoming a
364
00:13:08.620 --> 00:13:11.419
bit moody and moving into teenager. So are you having
365
00:13:11.440 --> 00:13:15.519
to switch between the two quite effortlessly? Yeah, I mean,
366
00:13:15.620 --> 00:13:16.659
I always thought that.
367
00:13:17.179 --> 00:13:19.490
We've been up most of the night, my two-year-old, who...
368
00:13:20.340 --> 00:13:22.899
just been sick about two or three times in the
369
00:13:22.970 --> 00:13:25.830
night so that was kind of annoying but i mean
370
00:13:25.850 --> 00:13:29.970
that to me is easier than the 12 year old
371
00:13:29.990 --> 00:13:33.549
because that feels really basic and just like change a
372
00:13:33.590 --> 00:13:36.909
sheet wipe a shitty anus.
373
00:13:36.960 --> 00:13:39.100
And then you sort the kid out am i right sorry.
374
00:13:39.799 --> 00:13:41.600
And that's just my first wife.
375
00:13:43.159 --> 00:13:45.500
I'm allowed one of them a month on this show.
376
00:13:45.539 --> 00:13:48.570
They get served up so easy. It's hard not to,
377
00:13:48.590 --> 00:13:49.259
so apologies.
378
00:13:49.679 --> 00:13:53.009
But my 12-year-old's like, there's affairs of the heart now
379
00:13:53.110 --> 00:13:55.990
and his heart gets a bit proactive and he likes someone.
380
00:13:56.529 --> 00:13:58.809
It's a lot harder because also as much as I
381
00:13:59.669 --> 00:14:03.570
just want to make it go away, there's also, because
382
00:14:03.610 --> 00:14:06.549
I'm like a huge people pleaser, so what I want
383
00:14:06.570 --> 00:14:09.070
to do is just jump in and just fix it.
384
00:14:09.870 --> 00:14:14.159
But in fact, what I should do is just do nothing. Yes,
385
00:14:14.179 --> 00:14:16.559
I can guide slightly, but I just need to let
386
00:14:16.600 --> 00:14:20.799
him feel what that emotion feels like. Otherwise, you get
387
00:14:20.840 --> 00:14:23.299
to a point in your 20s and you just don't
388
00:14:23.379 --> 00:14:25.129
know how to deal with any of that shit.
389
00:14:25.789 --> 00:14:27.490
God, yeah, that is tough, isn't it?
390
00:14:27.929 --> 00:14:30.190
I think that's the hardest thing. I mean, I've got
391
00:14:30.210 --> 00:14:32.669
a seven year old, eight and six mine at the
392
00:14:32.710 --> 00:14:34.360
end of the year. It's that kind of thing where
393
00:14:34.379 --> 00:14:36.740
they're going into school now and there's friendship groups and
394
00:14:37.080 --> 00:14:38.799
they're my friend, they're not my friend and I want
395
00:14:38.840 --> 00:14:40.279
to go here and all this kind of stuff. And
396
00:14:40.639 --> 00:14:42.519
that only gets sort of more intense as they go
397
00:14:42.559 --> 00:14:44.720
to teenagers. But like you say, you can be there
398
00:14:44.759 --> 00:14:46.419
and supportive and stuff, but you do just have to
399
00:14:46.460 --> 00:14:49.139
do nothing and let them learn. And it's awful.
400
00:14:49.419 --> 00:14:52.000
It is difficult because it's like you want to soothe them.
401
00:14:52.100 --> 00:14:55.019
But I mean, I think what being a parent, I've
402
00:14:55.039 --> 00:14:56.659
got two boys and a little girl, and I think
403
00:14:56.779 --> 00:14:59.240
it's very important. I learned this quite a while ago,
404
00:14:59.279 --> 00:15:03.629
but I'm essentially wanting to parent good men, like in
405
00:15:03.669 --> 00:15:06.529
their 20s and 30s and their 40s. I think people
406
00:15:06.549 --> 00:15:09.850
just parent, let's just parent now until they're not children anymore.
407
00:15:09.950 --> 00:15:12.809
And then you're on your own. It's like, well, if
408
00:15:12.850 --> 00:15:16.129
we can do a good job of parenting good men,
409
00:15:16.389 --> 00:15:18.600
then I think that's probably the best thing I can
410
00:15:18.629 --> 00:15:19.320
do as a dad.
411
00:15:20.000 --> 00:15:21.980
Well, that's a nice way of thinking of it. It's
412
00:15:22.000 --> 00:15:24.720
the long game, isn't it? You're playing the long game.
413
00:15:24.940 --> 00:15:27.860
You know, you want them to know about consent and
414
00:15:28.379 --> 00:15:31.600
being a fucking good guy and not being treated like shit.
415
00:15:32.789 --> 00:15:34.940
I think for many years I had that weird thing
416
00:15:34.980 --> 00:15:37.600
where I was like, can someone love me?
417
00:15:38.179 --> 00:15:38.559
Anyone?
418
00:15:38.919 --> 00:15:42.379
Can this really beautiful girl who hates me and treats
419
00:15:42.419 --> 00:15:44.840
me like shit, will you love me a bit? I
420
00:15:44.879 --> 00:15:46.960
don't want them to do that. I don't want them
421
00:15:47.000 --> 00:15:49.940
to feel that, you know? So if I can, in
422
00:15:49.980 --> 00:15:52.440
a way, teach them that you don't need any of
423
00:15:52.500 --> 00:15:55.279
this shit, then that might be enough as a dad.
424
00:15:55.779 --> 00:15:57.759
Do you feel like, because you've got the older child
425
00:15:57.779 --> 00:16:00.399
that you've sort of learned that and made a few mistakes,
426
00:16:00.659 --> 00:16:02.889
not mistakes, but like, In the past, you may have
427
00:16:03.129 --> 00:16:05.750
got too involved in trying to help your child because
428
00:16:05.769 --> 00:16:08.129
you're a people pleaser, whereas now you've sort of learned
429
00:16:08.149 --> 00:16:09.990
to step away a bit. Have you had things where, like,
430
00:16:10.190 --> 00:16:12.649
you've marched up to someone in the playground or told
431
00:16:12.669 --> 00:16:14.879
them to do this and do that? Or from the start,
432
00:16:14.889 --> 00:16:16.309
was you always letting them get on with it?
433
00:16:16.860 --> 00:16:19.049
I'm always kind of a fan of sitting back and
434
00:16:19.120 --> 00:16:21.220
seeing what they can do, you know, seeing how they
435
00:16:21.259 --> 00:16:24.100
deal with it. I think with my older one, obviously,
436
00:16:25.100 --> 00:16:28.129
not people pleaser as in... People pleaser in terms of
437
00:16:28.169 --> 00:16:30.409
my 12-year-old just wanting to take his pain away.
438
00:16:30.570 --> 00:16:31.309
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
439
00:16:31.409 --> 00:16:32.029
For the kids.
440
00:16:32.450 --> 00:16:33.149
Yeah, yeah, of course.
441
00:16:33.250 --> 00:16:34.570
You're based in the UK, are you?
442
00:16:34.610 --> 00:16:37.169
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I live down in the southwest of London.
443
00:16:37.610 --> 00:16:41.070
Because obviously you work a lot in America and Hollywood
444
00:16:41.110 --> 00:16:44.070
and stuff. So do you ever go out there much?
445
00:16:44.549 --> 00:16:46.850
Have you considered going out there with your kids?
446
00:16:47.570 --> 00:16:50.129
I did a job for CBS two years ago when
447
00:16:50.169 --> 00:16:53.049
we were there for 10 months. And so the kids
448
00:16:53.090 --> 00:16:56.269
were there and then I'm very fortunate that my ex-wife
449
00:16:56.350 --> 00:16:59.169
and my wife now are friends and they hang out
450
00:16:59.250 --> 00:17:02.470
without me and they hang out with the kids and stuff.
451
00:17:02.950 --> 00:17:05.279
And so we were all there together and the ex-wife
452
00:17:05.339 --> 00:17:07.859
came out a few times. And so I was lucky
453
00:17:07.890 --> 00:17:10.220
enough to have all the kids with me for quite
454
00:17:10.240 --> 00:17:10.599
a bit.
455
00:17:11.000 --> 00:17:13.059
Oh, that's brilliant because that can always be the bit
456
00:17:13.099 --> 00:17:15.720
of the, my dad was married before and had two
457
00:17:15.779 --> 00:17:18.859
kids and stuff. And it's so tricky because it's always
458
00:17:18.900 --> 00:17:21.609
different of like trying to get it to a healthy
459
00:17:21.650 --> 00:17:25.359
relationship between the kids and the other parents but yeah
460
00:17:25.440 --> 00:17:27.720
well the kids are together all the time so that
461
00:17:27.779 --> 00:17:30.799
is great we've really me and the mums have really
462
00:17:30.859 --> 00:17:34.140
worked hard at it unfortunately I've an amazing partner now
463
00:17:34.200 --> 00:17:36.650
who's kind of great with it because I know there
464
00:17:36.690 --> 00:17:38.849
are people who'd be like no sorry she ain't coming
465
00:17:38.869 --> 00:17:42.970
around that's not my kid yeah it works great but
466
00:17:42.990 --> 00:17:45.349
to be in LA was I just couldn't as soon
467
00:17:45.369 --> 00:17:46.509
as we get out of.
468
00:17:46.509 --> 00:17:51.380
There we were like Let's go. Really? I mean, I
469
00:17:51.400 --> 00:17:53.700
think it was at the point of the Trump handover
470
00:17:53.740 --> 00:17:56.799
as well. So there was an actual conversation with my
471
00:17:56.839 --> 00:17:59.849
American agent where it's like, if there's a civil war,
472
00:17:59.960 --> 00:18:02.430
will you guys just fly me out like then with
473
00:18:02.450 --> 00:18:05.910
the kids and stuff? I just never felt safe. I
474
00:18:05.930 --> 00:18:08.970
never felt safe driving them to school and I never
475
00:18:09.029 --> 00:18:10.250
felt safe at school.
476
00:18:10.349 --> 00:18:12.329
I just didn't like it at all.
477
00:18:12.890 --> 00:18:13.190
Yeah.
478
00:18:13.329 --> 00:18:15.730
I don't think there's been a firmer no to moving
479
00:18:15.750 --> 00:18:16.549
to Hollywood there than that.
480
00:18:18.680 --> 00:18:21.029
Also, I'm British. You know, my family are here.
481
00:18:21.150 --> 00:18:22.769
I like it here.
482
00:18:22.869 --> 00:18:25.410
I like our life. It's like there wasn't a life there.
483
00:18:25.450 --> 00:18:27.710
I mean, yes, it was nice. We could go to
484
00:18:27.750 --> 00:18:30.509
the beach kind of every day, but you can't fucking
485
00:18:30.569 --> 00:18:35.619
swim because there's great whites everywhere. Not like the men.
486
00:18:35.690 --> 00:18:36.599
It's like, go on, kids.
487
00:18:36.730 --> 00:18:37.720
You just have to watch them.
488
00:18:38.140 --> 00:18:41.200
So your book's about, well, half memoir, half cooking. Do
489
00:18:41.220 --> 00:18:43.119
you do a lot of cooking with your kids? Because
490
00:18:43.140 --> 00:18:45.099
I try and do stuff with my kids, but I
491
00:18:45.119 --> 00:18:47.259
just find it's quite annoying because they just keep fucking
492
00:18:47.279 --> 00:18:47.549
it up.
493
00:18:47.599 --> 00:18:51.710
Oh, God. I hate it. I hate it. If I
494
00:18:51.750 --> 00:18:55.029
can do it without them being around, I would totally.
495
00:18:55.470 --> 00:18:58.750
Or what I'll do sometimes is I'll do like dummy
496
00:18:58.829 --> 00:19:01.410
set up. So I'll have like a bowl with just
497
00:19:01.569 --> 00:19:05.359
flour in that I'll just tend to use. And then
498
00:19:05.420 --> 00:19:07.700
they can crack eggs and put ketchup in it and
499
00:19:07.839 --> 00:19:09.819
like stir it up and that.
500
00:19:10.240 --> 00:19:12.710
Right. But that's a bit like Rocky 3, isn't it?
501
00:19:12.720 --> 00:19:15.019
Where he just keeps getting fed bums. but I think
502
00:19:15.059 --> 00:19:16.259
they're making good cakes.
503
00:19:16.859 --> 00:19:20.529
Yeah, right. Whenever I can feed my kid bums, that's
504
00:19:20.990 --> 00:19:23.849
a good day. Like last night, I was like, come on,
505
00:19:23.849 --> 00:19:25.759
let's have a barbecue. Tell me, let's have a barbecue.
506
00:19:25.779 --> 00:19:26.039
Come on.
507
00:19:26.640 --> 00:19:28.779
So like we had a barbecue and stuff and they
508
00:19:28.819 --> 00:19:30.940
like to kind of be around the coals when they're
509
00:19:30.960 --> 00:19:33.730
being lit and It felt good a bit, and then
510
00:19:33.769 --> 00:19:35.630
it was really smoky, and then I lost my rag
511
00:19:35.650 --> 00:19:38.599
because they wouldn't move back, and I'm like, smoke, just
512
00:19:38.640 --> 00:19:42.200
move away! And then it didn't become as fun as
513
00:19:42.259 --> 00:19:44.660
I imagined. But we got nice burgers in the end.
514
00:19:44.740 --> 00:19:47.210
It was fine. As soon as all the smoke stopped
515
00:19:47.269 --> 00:19:49.750
and it turned just to, like, the charcoal and fire
516
00:19:49.809 --> 00:19:52.140
and they can throw little bits of wood in and
517
00:19:52.359 --> 00:19:54.980
it was fun again. Because I've got ADHD too, so
518
00:19:55.019 --> 00:19:58.460
sometimes I just literally can't control myself. And I'm getting
519
00:19:58.480 --> 00:20:00.579
better at it since I've realised I do it. I
520
00:20:00.619 --> 00:20:03.980
do get better at it, but I'm a great shirt ripper.
521
00:20:04.480 --> 00:20:08.269
So sometimes if I get like angry... Or like I
522
00:20:08.289 --> 00:20:12.089
could feel a million emotions and I become out of control.
523
00:20:12.410 --> 00:20:15.509
I'll just literally grab my shirt and just tear it
524
00:20:15.569 --> 00:20:15.990
in half.
525
00:20:16.930 --> 00:20:17.490
Oh, wow.
526
00:20:18.309 --> 00:20:22.329
The kids like it. When like an adult does something
527
00:20:22.349 --> 00:20:24.710
that's really weird, I find kids love that thing.
528
00:20:24.990 --> 00:20:27.160
Do you clock if it's a shirt you like?
529
00:20:27.779 --> 00:20:31.799
I don't give a shit. It's gone. I'll go into
530
00:20:31.819 --> 00:20:34.579
the downstairs toilet clothed and then I'll come out with
531
00:20:34.619 --> 00:20:35.200
no shirt on.
532
00:20:36.660 --> 00:20:37.869
I mean, no, what's happened?
533
00:20:38.890 --> 00:20:41.130
I've got a T-shirt in the bin. And the kids
534
00:20:41.170 --> 00:20:42.910
are like, Daddy, where have your clothes gone?
535
00:20:44.089 --> 00:20:46.509
So is that a manifestation of ADHD then, where it's
536
00:20:46.549 --> 00:20:48.630
just all a bit overwhelming and you need to let
537
00:20:48.670 --> 00:20:49.049
it out?
538
00:20:49.529 --> 00:20:54.059
Yeah, I just get so overstimulated and I don't know
539
00:20:54.160 --> 00:20:55.019
what else to do.
540
00:20:55.700 --> 00:20:58.539
I scream into pillows. Do you ever do pillow screams?
541
00:20:59.289 --> 00:21:00.369
Sometimes after sex.
542
00:21:01.809 --> 00:21:03.829
Not during. Not during.
543
00:21:03.910 --> 00:21:08.319
Just after. There are aspects of ADHD that the kids love,
544
00:21:08.339 --> 00:21:11.460
you know what I mean? Like, we have just millions
545
00:21:11.500 --> 00:21:14.960
of characters in the house and we have Big Daddy
546
00:21:15.000 --> 00:21:17.630
Chicken and... What's Big Daddy Chicken?
547
00:21:18.150 --> 00:21:19.950
You can't squirt over Big Daddy Chicken.
548
00:21:21.029 --> 00:21:23.690
Daddy Robot's nice because he's like a robot that drives
549
00:21:23.730 --> 00:21:26.170
the kids to school, but he has like a weird
550
00:21:26.230 --> 00:21:28.589
vibe where he keeps saying to the kids, would you
551
00:21:28.630 --> 00:21:32.250
like me to crash into another vehicle? And the kids
552
00:21:32.309 --> 00:21:35.950
are kind of like, Daddy Crash! Daddy Crash! They love
553
00:21:35.990 --> 00:21:38.839
the fact that Daddy Robot might crash into an oncoming vehicle.
554
00:21:38.859 --> 00:21:41.059
So you've got Daddy Robot drives the cars, and what's
555
00:21:41.099 --> 00:21:41.859
Daddy Chicken do?
556
00:21:42.500 --> 00:21:45.440
Daddy Chicken, he's just like around every now and again,
557
00:21:45.539 --> 00:21:48.220
so if the kids are somewhere, I'll often kind of do...
558
00:21:50.140 --> 00:21:52.940
And they'll like run out and then I'll just be
559
00:21:52.960 --> 00:21:54.480
like a massive chicken for.
560
00:21:54.380 --> 00:21:58.960
About 10 minutes. Have you seen the dinosaur dad? It's online.
561
00:21:59.000 --> 00:22:01.720
It's on like YouTube and on TikTok, I think. They go,
562
00:22:01.779 --> 00:22:04.180
daddy dinosaur. And if all three of the girls, his
563
00:22:04.200 --> 00:22:07.000
daughters say it, he just turns into like a velociraptor,
564
00:22:07.259 --> 00:22:10.779
but fucks shit up, like smashes milk on the floor,
565
00:22:11.180 --> 00:22:13.359
crisps everywhere, jumps on a table, but does it in
566
00:22:13.420 --> 00:22:15.000
public and stuff like that. And the mum is like
567
00:22:15.019 --> 00:22:17.140
mortified and the kids are absolutely loving it.
568
00:22:18.039 --> 00:22:21.420
That's cool, yeah. Yeah, there's bits like that. And I've
569
00:22:21.460 --> 00:22:23.420
usually put the little baby to bed every night and
570
00:22:23.579 --> 00:22:26.920
my partner does, our five-year-old. But I do this weird
571
00:22:26.960 --> 00:22:29.289
thing where I pretend to be a delivery driver who
572
00:22:29.309 --> 00:22:32.410
just happens to be in the house. And then, like,
573
00:22:32.529 --> 00:22:34.720
I knock on the door and I slightly get his
574
00:22:34.779 --> 00:22:38.000
name wrong. And he's puzzled. He's not sure why this
575
00:22:38.039 --> 00:22:40.589
delivery driver's in. And then I get him to sign
576
00:22:40.609 --> 00:22:42.950
his name on my phone like he's got a delivery.
577
00:22:43.569 --> 00:22:45.829
And then that delivery is always 60 kisses. Oh. LAUGHTER
578
00:22:49.410 --> 00:22:51.170
He does a thing where he's quite clever, like he
579
00:22:51.190 --> 00:22:53.269
pretends he's like, what is this? So what am I
580
00:22:53.289 --> 00:22:54.970
signing for? I'm like, oh, hang on, let me see
581
00:22:54.990 --> 00:22:58.380
who signs it. OK, you got, ah, right, it's 60 Kisses.
582
00:22:58.940 --> 00:23:02.759
And then he's like, no, but he loves 60 Kisses. Oh, amazing.
583
00:23:03.700 --> 00:23:06.819
Are you the kind of person who would embarrass your
584
00:23:06.839 --> 00:23:09.500
children in public, like Rob was saying about, would you
585
00:23:09.519 --> 00:23:11.960
do big characters and stuff? Like my dad in the
586
00:23:12.019 --> 00:23:13.869
street would enjoy embarrassing us.
587
00:23:14.690 --> 00:23:17.450
My little ones, they don't really get it as much.
588
00:23:17.569 --> 00:23:22.130
But the big one, yes, definitely. No, I mean, not loads.
589
00:23:22.170 --> 00:23:25.759
My mate Smiley used to embarrass his kids all the time.
590
00:23:26.220 --> 00:23:28.220
So I'm not as bad as that. But, yeah, I mean,
591
00:23:28.500 --> 00:23:31.799
especially when it comes to, like, loving him in front
592
00:23:31.839 --> 00:23:34.880
of friends or trying to hold his hand or give
593
00:23:34.900 --> 00:23:40.789
daddy a kissy. Oh, God. Get off. Get off. Yeah,
594
00:23:40.829 --> 00:23:43.170
I mean, being in a restaurant and making a noise
595
00:23:43.269 --> 00:23:45.269
is kind of embarrassing, but they like it, you know.
596
00:23:45.630 --> 00:23:47.910
We do a thing, because we live down in Twickenham,
597
00:23:48.390 --> 00:23:50.089
and they all do it, and they all get involved,
598
00:23:50.130 --> 00:23:51.930
which I think is great, and I love it, but
599
00:23:52.440 --> 00:23:55.440
we have a thing about how many rugby matches are
600
00:23:55.460 --> 00:23:59.380
in Twickenham? You're like, 20? But the whole place is just, like,
601
00:23:59.619 --> 00:24:04.440
rampant with men wearing pink cords and wax jackets, and
602
00:24:04.480 --> 00:24:09.509
they're here for the rugby. We'll all drive around... with
603
00:24:09.529 --> 00:24:12.289
the windows down, and then whenever we see the big
604
00:24:12.329 --> 00:24:16.049
groups of men travelling toward Twickenham, we'll all shout individually
605
00:24:16.150 --> 00:24:23.109
things along the lines of, come on rugby! It's really
606
00:24:23.210 --> 00:24:28.440
funny because my five-year-old says, play at the rugby! I
607
00:24:28.660 --> 00:24:31.279
drive really slowly past them and I think they love
608
00:24:31.319 --> 00:24:35.019
the batter. We shouldn't be doing it. And then I
609
00:24:35.039 --> 00:24:37.180
drive really fast as well, they love it.
610
00:24:39.809 --> 00:24:42.359
What did you say your mate Smiley does in various...
611
00:24:42.099 --> 00:24:43.140
What does he do to his kids?
612
00:24:43.180 --> 00:24:44.180
Is that Michael Smiley?
613
00:24:44.480 --> 00:24:46.759
Yeah, he used to like... His kids are really... I mean,
614
00:24:46.779 --> 00:24:49.349
they're old now. They're proper men and people. But he
615
00:24:49.410 --> 00:24:51.450
used to stand at the school gates and shout, I
616
00:24:51.470 --> 00:24:56.309
love you! really loud as they went.
617
00:24:56.269 --> 00:24:57.769
In my dad used to do stuff like that to
618
00:24:57.789 --> 00:24:59.349
me I don't think I could do that to mine
619
00:24:59.369 --> 00:25:00.950
because he used to make I can still feel my
620
00:25:01.009 --> 00:25:02.869
shoulders going up when my dad used to do that
621
00:25:02.890 --> 00:25:04.710
in front of me he'd like kiss me on the
622
00:25:04.819 --> 00:25:06.700
lips like when like my mates around when I was
623
00:25:06.720 --> 00:25:08.640
like 16 going are you too old to give your
624
00:25:08.680 --> 00:25:11.720
daddy a little kiss I'd be like fuck off.
625
00:25:13.839 --> 00:25:17.539
Kiss daddy yeah kiss daddy Rob.
626
00:25:18.099 --> 00:25:21.230
No don't it's like a therapy session you take me
627
00:25:21.269 --> 00:25:23.289
back to a pain body yeah.
628
00:25:24.200 --> 00:25:26.339
What do they make of your... Because you've got, like,
629
00:25:26.460 --> 00:25:30.869
such an exciting, cool career for a kid's dad to have.
630
00:25:30.890 --> 00:25:34.410
Does the 12-year-old must be really thrilled by it, or
631
00:25:34.430 --> 00:25:36.339
are they embarrassed by it?
632
00:25:36.430 --> 00:25:40.009
Honestly, I don't think he gives a fuck. I was
633
00:25:40.069 --> 00:25:41.690
on the one show the other day, and he sent
634
00:25:41.710 --> 00:25:45.799
me a WhatsApp. And all it said was, you look nervous.
635
00:25:46.460 --> 00:25:49.619
Oh, no. Oh, God.
636
00:25:49.660 --> 00:25:53.269
Didn't enjoy it or you look nervous. You know what
637
00:25:53.289 --> 00:25:55.970
he likes? He likes whenever I'm doing a film and
638
00:25:55.990 --> 00:25:59.069
there's a drone on set. He's all about the drone.
639
00:25:59.089 --> 00:26:02.799
He loves that aspect of it. He doesn't really, I mean,
640
00:26:02.839 --> 00:26:04.519
why would he? He's 12, but he doesn't really know
641
00:26:04.660 --> 00:26:07.420
what he wants to do. But I think I'd love
642
00:26:07.440 --> 00:26:10.119
to try and get him somehow onto a set at
643
00:26:10.180 --> 00:26:10.720
some point.
644
00:26:11.039 --> 00:26:12.140
Loads of money in drone work.
645
00:26:12.660 --> 00:26:15.299
Yeah, exactly. I say to him, if you get good
646
00:26:15.339 --> 00:26:18.319
at these things, this could be a career for you. Yeah.
647
00:26:19.029 --> 00:26:20.829
Were you actually nervous on the one show? Was he
648
00:26:20.869 --> 00:26:21.549
correct or not?
649
00:26:22.329 --> 00:26:24.970
No, I don't give a fuck. The only thing I'm
650
00:26:25.029 --> 00:26:28.069
nervous about is when they come in and say, just remember,
651
00:26:28.130 --> 00:26:31.789
please don't swear. I'm like, oh, why are you saying that?
652
00:26:31.809 --> 00:26:33.250
Because now it's all I want to do.
653
00:26:33.910 --> 00:26:35.440
Well, I find the hardest thing on the one show
654
00:26:35.500 --> 00:26:38.220
is making sure your face fits whatever video has just
655
00:26:38.240 --> 00:26:40.619
been on because they're all just chatting like they're having
656
00:26:40.660 --> 00:26:44.210
a coffee. But then there's like a horrendous cancer appeal video.
657
00:26:44.250 --> 00:26:46.490
And then it cuts back to you like, yes, I
658
00:26:46.529 --> 00:26:47.910
got a new book.
659
00:26:47.990 --> 00:26:48.890
Yeah, right.
660
00:26:48.930 --> 00:26:52.309
Just the face. They did one about fairground safety when
661
00:26:52.369 --> 00:26:55.170
I was on. The next two minutes, I'm like, what
662
00:26:55.190 --> 00:26:58.460
is my fairground safety face?
663
00:26:59.759 --> 00:27:01.599
You've been banned from the one show, Rob, though. So
664
00:27:01.619 --> 00:27:03.220
you're one of the few people that you know.
665
00:27:03.240 --> 00:27:05.259
No, I've been back on. Me and Romesh got banned together.
666
00:27:05.839 --> 00:27:08.440
because we were messing about too much. It's just so funny.
667
00:27:08.799 --> 00:27:10.099
And if you're on it with your mate, it's so
668
00:27:10.119 --> 00:27:11.660
hard not to just laugh at everything.
669
00:27:12.339 --> 00:27:14.140
Why would they ban that? It seems weird.
670
00:27:14.559 --> 00:27:16.920
Yeah, I think it just was a little bit too raucous.
671
00:27:17.420 --> 00:27:17.680
Right.
672
00:27:18.039 --> 00:27:20.140
Too much energy for the one show. That's you. I've
673
00:27:20.180 --> 00:27:21.160
always said it, Beckett.
674
00:27:21.380 --> 00:27:22.190
What day was it?
675
00:27:22.900 --> 00:27:25.619
Oh, I can't remember. It was the half an hour one, though.
676
00:27:25.720 --> 00:27:27.920
Or was it sometimes the hour one? It's just hilarious
677
00:27:27.940 --> 00:27:29.579
when you've got, like, Jermaine Genis, who used to play
678
00:27:29.599 --> 00:27:32.279
for Tottenham, talking about badger coals. And I'm like, I can't.
679
00:27:32.650 --> 00:27:34.420
There's never going to get a point where I don't
680
00:27:34.500 --> 00:27:38.099
find that funny. And when Jermaine Jenas, ex-footballer, just turns
681
00:27:38.119 --> 00:27:40.880
to the camera and goes, It's sad about those badges.
682
00:27:41.119 --> 00:27:43.700
So Rob, Romesh, you're doing drag in a new series.
683
00:27:43.720 --> 00:27:46.210
How can you not laugh? He said something to me
684
00:27:46.250 --> 00:27:48.369
on it about like, oh, you nearly got a part
685
00:27:48.410 --> 00:27:49.950
in the crown or something like that. I went, yeah,
686
00:27:49.990 --> 00:27:51.930
but I didn't. Don't bring that up. I could list
687
00:27:51.970 --> 00:27:55.069
all the teams that you didn't sign for. And then
688
00:27:55.089 --> 00:27:56.930
he went, why have you always got to make it
689
00:27:56.970 --> 00:28:00.819
about football? I thought, Jermaine, you are a footballer before
690
00:28:00.859 --> 00:28:03.819
a fucking TV presenter, mate. That's what your career was.
691
00:28:03.900 --> 00:28:04.880
And now you've got a new one.
692
00:28:05.299 --> 00:28:07.180
Did you always get a part in the crown, Rob?
693
00:28:07.420 --> 00:28:08.079
I didn't know this.
694
00:28:08.720 --> 00:28:11.619
So, you know when that plaster from Essex broke into
695
00:28:11.660 --> 00:28:13.900
the palace to speak with the Queen?
696
00:28:14.019 --> 00:28:15.940
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
697
00:28:16.019 --> 00:28:17.980
I really had to stretch myself to be a sort
698
00:28:18.009 --> 00:28:23.269
of mad, ill-educated labourer, tradesperson that climbed through a window.
699
00:28:23.410 --> 00:28:25.390
Oh, wow, that guy that broke into the Queen's bedroom.
700
00:28:25.650 --> 00:28:26.289
Michael something.
701
00:28:26.309 --> 00:28:27.190
Who got it in the end?
702
00:28:27.849 --> 00:28:29.150
I don't know, someone that could act, probably.
703
00:28:29.250 --> 00:28:31.509
I can't remember. I've seen it. He was very good, actually.
704
00:28:31.609 --> 00:28:33.910
It's mental, Nick, because you must do this a lot,
705
00:28:33.950 --> 00:28:35.990
but probably you don't have to audition anymore, but You
706
00:28:36.009 --> 00:28:38.289
go and, like, you learn a scene that maybe involves
707
00:28:38.430 --> 00:28:41.700
crying and having a breakdown, talking to the Queen, and then, like,
708
00:28:42.000 --> 00:28:43.539
you practise it loads. You go in for, like, three
709
00:28:43.559 --> 00:28:46.180
auditions and cry in front of strangers in an office,
710
00:28:46.640 --> 00:28:48.200
and then they go, yeah, thanks, it was great, but
711
00:28:48.220 --> 00:28:50.200
we're going with someone else. I'm like, I've just cried
712
00:28:50.269 --> 00:28:51.509
three times in front of you.
713
00:28:51.529 --> 00:28:56.269
I thought about my dad dying of lung cancer.
714
00:28:56.289 --> 00:28:56.750
Ten minutes.
715
00:28:58.279 --> 00:29:02.339
Yeah, I mean, I think if I'm guilty of anything,
716
00:29:02.500 --> 00:29:04.440
I mean, there's lots of things I'm guilty about, but
717
00:29:04.700 --> 00:29:08.269
when it comes to auditions, I just never try. Really?
718
00:29:08.690 --> 00:29:11.470
I never learn it. I just read it. I'm just like, oh,
719
00:29:11.509 --> 00:29:13.410
just give me it or don't. I don't give a shit.
720
00:29:14.869 --> 00:29:17.799
I mean, I could give more of a shit, I'm sure.
721
00:29:17.839 --> 00:29:20.150
Because you came into it a different route, didn't you?
722
00:29:20.190 --> 00:29:22.230
Is that right? You sort of weren't a trained actor
723
00:29:22.390 --> 00:29:24.190
as such from the start. You didn't go to school.
724
00:29:24.839 --> 00:29:26.960
No, not at all. I was waiting tables till I
725
00:29:27.000 --> 00:29:29.220
was like 28 and then Simon Pegg wrote me a
726
00:29:29.279 --> 00:29:32.339
part in Space and I was like, all right, let's
727
00:29:33.000 --> 00:29:36.049
do this for six weeks and then I went back
728
00:29:36.069 --> 00:29:39.400
to waitering and then a second series of space. And
729
00:29:39.440 --> 00:29:42.059
then after that, I got an agent and then I
730
00:29:42.099 --> 00:29:45.119
started getting more bits and pieces. And then I was
731
00:29:45.160 --> 00:29:48.700
like 35 and I was like, all right, let's give
732
00:29:48.740 --> 00:29:51.460
this a crack then. You're pretty good. You're getting work.
733
00:29:51.529 --> 00:29:53.289
Let's start taking this seriously.
734
00:29:53.950 --> 00:29:55.630
And then did you do any training then or has
735
00:29:55.650 --> 00:29:57.630
it always been just sort of natural instinct?
736
00:29:58.130 --> 00:30:04.410
Yeah, no, just... It's just pretending, right? You know, what
737
00:30:04.430 --> 00:30:06.630
I've always done is that I wanted to be a novelist.
738
00:30:06.710 --> 00:30:10.089
So even as a kid, I'd just look at people
739
00:30:10.269 --> 00:30:14.170
and listen to their conversations. And I think it was
740
00:30:14.230 --> 00:30:16.410
about learning the emotions. Do you know what I mean?
741
00:30:17.150 --> 00:30:19.630
I'm writing backstories for people you've never met. You're like
742
00:30:19.730 --> 00:30:22.619
in the boots, wait for prescription in boots. And you're like,
743
00:30:23.119 --> 00:30:25.920
who are these people? Why are you here? That was
744
00:30:25.960 --> 00:30:28.420
always the thing I've always loved. So yeah. I think
745
00:30:28.440 --> 00:30:30.960
when it came to acting, it was just a question of,
746
00:30:31.160 --> 00:30:33.880
I mean, I'm being really basic here, but just becoming
747
00:30:33.900 --> 00:30:37.460
that person and knowing their backstory and knowing why they
748
00:30:37.480 --> 00:30:39.890
do what they do and how they feel and why
749
00:30:39.930 --> 00:30:42.329
they feel what they feel, you know. Amazing.
750
00:30:42.529 --> 00:30:43.890
And do you still want to be a novelist?
751
00:30:44.609 --> 00:30:47.349
Yeah, I do. I mean, it's odd not being an actor.
752
00:30:47.369 --> 00:30:49.170
That's the weird thing about writing a book too, because
753
00:30:49.210 --> 00:30:52.880
it's like, I didn't want to do that thing where, well,
754
00:30:52.910 --> 00:30:55.240
you're an actor and I'm going to do this thing.
755
00:30:55.279 --> 00:30:59.259
You're a celebrity in some world. And now here I
756
00:30:59.480 --> 00:31:01.099
am doing a cookbook.
757
00:31:01.299 --> 00:31:05.779
Well, no, but you are properly into food, to be fair.
758
00:31:05.980 --> 00:31:07.809
On your social media, you can tell there's a real
759
00:31:07.849 --> 00:31:10.470
passion and love. But this is part memoir, part cookbook.
760
00:31:10.529 --> 00:31:12.869
It's called A Slice of Fired Gold.
761
00:31:13.250 --> 00:31:14.250
Fried Gold, yeah.
762
00:31:14.269 --> 00:31:15.230
Sorry, yeah, Fried Gold is it.
763
00:31:15.230 --> 00:31:17.650
Well, I just wanted it to be like, yes, I
764
00:31:17.690 --> 00:31:21.170
love food. I love cooking. Here's everything I cook at
765
00:31:21.190 --> 00:31:23.430
home for the kids and for my family. And this
766
00:31:23.509 --> 00:31:25.930
is why I do it. And then also there's some
767
00:31:25.970 --> 00:31:29.009
kind of flights of fancy and There's a story about
768
00:31:29.069 --> 00:31:31.789
ragu and it begins the ragu recipe that I used.
769
00:31:31.869 --> 00:31:35.039
And then I kind of really slowly just start to
770
00:31:35.099 --> 00:31:40.099
introduce these characters, like an Italian lady called Bianca who's 16.
771
00:31:40.079 --> 00:31:43.299
And then she meets this guy at a wedding and
772
00:31:43.359 --> 00:31:46.180
her father's an alcoholic and it can never be. And
773
00:31:46.220 --> 00:31:49.049
eventually they have a little kiss and then they fall
774
00:31:49.109 --> 00:31:51.809
in love and they have like loads of kids. And
775
00:31:51.849 --> 00:31:54.730
then she dies of lung cancer in her 80s. And
776
00:31:54.769 --> 00:31:57.269
then it goes to, then add butter. You know what
777
00:31:57.309 --> 00:31:59.579
I mean? I love the fact that you can take
778
00:31:59.630 --> 00:32:02.440
a recipe and it becomes like a weird... I like
779
00:32:02.480 --> 00:32:05.539
that thing sometimes when you're reading a book or you're
780
00:32:05.599 --> 00:32:08.240
reading someone's kind of flight of fancy and you turn
781
00:32:08.279 --> 00:32:10.279
a page and you're like, how the fuck did we
782
00:32:10.299 --> 00:32:12.299
get here? And I thought it would be fun if
783
00:32:12.319 --> 00:32:14.180
you could do that for a recipe book as well.
784
00:32:14.789 --> 00:32:17.430
Did you enjoy writing it? Because it's a completely different
785
00:32:17.450 --> 00:32:19.170
thing to do again. You're like going, I'm going to
786
00:32:19.230 --> 00:32:21.829
sit down and I'm going to do 2,000 words a
787
00:32:21.869 --> 00:32:23.319
day or how did it work for you?
788
00:32:23.799 --> 00:32:26.259
I don't really worry about the amount I do a day,
789
00:32:26.359 --> 00:32:29.740
but I'll get up and I'll sit at a desk
790
00:32:29.759 --> 00:32:33.539
at like 8 a.m. and I'll always have films on
791
00:32:33.559 --> 00:32:38.279
in the background or something shit like Outback Opal Hunters
792
00:32:38.740 --> 00:32:42.140
or Outback. Speaking of the word Outback in it, I
793
00:32:42.180 --> 00:32:44.599
tend to enjoy. So that will be on in the
794
00:32:44.640 --> 00:32:48.289
background and I'll work until 12. I'll have like 40
795
00:32:48.289 --> 00:32:49.930
minutes off to have a sandwich and a cup of
796
00:32:49.970 --> 00:32:53.480
tea and then I'll work until 3. Nice. I do
797
00:32:53.599 --> 00:32:55.630
love that. When I was a younger man, I wanted
798
00:32:55.670 --> 00:32:58.269
to be a novelist. I kind of loved that vibe
799
00:32:58.869 --> 00:33:00.589
of you want to write a novel, but you never
800
00:33:00.670 --> 00:33:03.579
really write. And you just kind of fall in love
801
00:33:03.640 --> 00:33:05.900
and it hurts so much that you can't move and
802
00:33:06.359 --> 00:33:09.519
you smoke a hundred cigarettes and... you eat a kind
803
00:33:09.579 --> 00:33:13.960
of watery soup made of potatoes and then you see
804
00:33:14.000 --> 00:33:16.279
the woman you love and she's with someone else and
805
00:33:16.299 --> 00:33:17.980
you want to kill yourself. You know, I kind of
806
00:33:18.039 --> 00:33:23.819
love that ennui about writing some books and that's fine.
807
00:33:24.160 --> 00:33:27.500
And I love that kind of romance about being a novelist.
808
00:33:27.539 --> 00:33:32.619
But when you start writing films and television and they say, okay,
809
00:33:32.660 --> 00:33:36.319
so we need a first draft in four weeks, that
810
00:33:36.380 --> 00:33:42.039
kind of, romanticized notion of what a writer is goes
811
00:33:42.160 --> 00:33:45.220
out the window pretty quick and you have to learn
812
00:33:45.240 --> 00:33:49.519
that discipline of write any old shit and just get
813
00:33:49.559 --> 00:33:51.920
it down and then we'll fix it later.
814
00:33:51.740 --> 00:33:53.500
Do you think in your book that's why you've sort
815
00:33:53.519 --> 00:33:55.420
of got a few like flights of fancy sort of
816
00:33:55.460 --> 00:33:58.740
like having a little go at that sort of novel-y
817
00:33:58.839 --> 00:34:02.279
stuff of creating stories and characters Was that a way
818
00:34:02.299 --> 00:34:06.269
to express that? Because it is about your life as well.
819
00:34:06.289 --> 00:34:08.869
Yeah, I just wanted it to be a bit fun
820
00:34:08.909 --> 00:34:12.010
as well. I didn't just want to write... Who am
821
00:34:12.250 --> 00:34:15.489
I to write a frigging recipe book? It's like, well, okay,
822
00:34:15.510 --> 00:34:17.090
so if I am going to write a recipe book,
823
00:34:17.510 --> 00:34:20.800
I want it to have a connection to things that
824
00:34:20.840 --> 00:34:23.920
matter to me in terms of family and food that
825
00:34:23.940 --> 00:34:26.980
I love cooking, food I love cooking for people. And
826
00:34:27.679 --> 00:34:30.969
it's going to be weird and funny and... I get
827
00:34:30.989 --> 00:34:35.239
a chance to write little bits of fictionalised prose as well.
828
00:34:35.280 --> 00:34:35.860
And it's fun.
829
00:34:36.539 --> 00:34:38.820
You're writing there about like the beef stroganoff was your
830
00:34:38.860 --> 00:34:40.539
favourite growing up and your mum used to make that.
831
00:34:40.619 --> 00:34:42.809
And you write about your mum being an alcoholic. And
832
00:34:43.070 --> 00:34:46.369
as that got worse, you took over the cooking and
833
00:34:46.389 --> 00:34:48.949
started making the beef stroganoff for yourself and things like that.
834
00:34:49.539 --> 00:34:51.880
How does that feel where that was your childhood? And
835
00:34:51.940 --> 00:34:54.199
then now you've got kids the same age, you've got
836
00:34:54.219 --> 00:34:57.019
your 12-year-old, which would have been you having to cook
837
00:34:57.039 --> 00:34:59.829
that dinner because your mum wasn't very well. How does
838
00:34:59.849 --> 00:35:01.090
it make you feel as a parent now?
839
00:35:02.329 --> 00:35:05.789
Right now, today, I think I'm very... I feel very
840
00:35:05.929 --> 00:35:09.110
proud that they will never have to go through what
841
00:35:09.150 --> 00:35:13.769
I went through. And fortunately, after a long time of...
842
00:35:14.550 --> 00:35:19.190
working through how I felt about my mum and my
843
00:35:19.289 --> 00:35:23.050
dad and my life growing up I'm now at a
844
00:35:23.130 --> 00:35:26.610
point where as a 51 year old man I fucking
845
00:35:26.809 --> 00:35:29.719
completely get why my mum did what she did and
846
00:35:29.760 --> 00:35:31.679
I didn't for a long time and it made me
847
00:35:32.260 --> 00:35:35.969
very resentful and very angry and As we all know,
848
00:35:36.010 --> 00:35:38.190
if you sit with that resentment and anger, you yourself
849
00:35:38.230 --> 00:35:41.710
become a cancer, you know. So I think it was
850
00:35:41.789 --> 00:35:45.750
about six or seven years ago that I suddenly was like,
851
00:35:46.070 --> 00:35:49.869
you know what? I totally get it. Totally understand. And
852
00:35:49.929 --> 00:35:52.650
they will never have to feel that. But in writing
853
00:35:52.690 --> 00:35:55.070
these books, I mean, my first book too was a
854
00:35:55.110 --> 00:35:57.449
memoir and this was a kind of memoir, but it's
855
00:35:57.530 --> 00:36:01.190
also about food. But my parents died and I didn't
856
00:36:01.210 --> 00:36:03.389
fucking know anything about them. You know what I mean?
857
00:36:03.429 --> 00:36:06.929
I didn't know who, what they were afraid of. What's
858
00:36:06.969 --> 00:36:09.489
your favourite film? What do you like doing? Do you
859
00:36:09.510 --> 00:36:11.469
like spiders? You know what I mean? I didn't know
860
00:36:11.530 --> 00:36:15.190
any of that stuff. So at least writing these things,
861
00:36:15.230 --> 00:36:17.590
there's a chance for my kids to be able to say, well,
862
00:36:17.610 --> 00:36:19.750
this is what Dad went through and this is who
863
00:36:19.809 --> 00:36:23.150
he was a little bit. I fucking hate the phrase legacy,
864
00:36:23.190 --> 00:36:25.769
but it's a chance to leave them something which isn't
865
00:36:25.829 --> 00:36:30.469
just me fucking off a radio because I'm mad. Yeah, exactly.
866
00:36:30.489 --> 00:36:32.019
Something they can physically pick up.
867
00:36:33.139 --> 00:36:35.659
Years ago, I went to the Barbican with my ex-wife.
868
00:36:36.159 --> 00:36:38.860
We went to see a play. I've got a really
869
00:36:38.960 --> 00:36:43.510
weird thing. If I can feel the bottoms of jeans, like,
870
00:36:43.809 --> 00:36:46.929
catching on the heel of a shoe, do you know
871
00:36:46.949 --> 00:36:49.289
what I mean? Yeah, yeah. If I can feel that,
872
00:36:49.409 --> 00:36:53.610
it just drives me more and more insane. And, like,
873
00:36:53.769 --> 00:36:55.949
we drove to Barbican and the traffic was shit, so
874
00:36:55.969 --> 00:36:58.369
I had the ump anyway. And then I could just
875
00:36:58.570 --> 00:37:01.110
feel the bottom of these trousers just keep catching on
876
00:37:01.130 --> 00:37:03.710
the bottom of my shoes. And so I got so
877
00:37:03.889 --> 00:37:08.130
umpy that I reached down and I essentially tore the
878
00:37:08.170 --> 00:37:16.400
jeans so they became chaps. And we're like in the
879
00:37:16.519 --> 00:37:21.659
foyer of the barbecue and I'm now wearing denim chaps.
880
00:37:21.679 --> 00:37:24.400
To which point my wife just turned around and walked
881
00:37:24.460 --> 00:37:28.409
back to the car. And that was it. We never
882
00:37:28.449 --> 00:37:29.429
got to see the play again.
883
00:37:30.110 --> 00:37:31.570
What is it about the jeans? Is that something from
884
00:37:31.590 --> 00:37:33.699
childhood or something where you had to wear a bad
885
00:37:33.739 --> 00:37:35.489
pair of jeans that were too long or something?
886
00:37:35.510 --> 00:37:39.699
I just feel it catching underneath. I'm like, fuck that. Why?
887
00:37:40.539 --> 00:37:43.219
Maybe it's about why your stupid legs go small.
888
00:37:43.860 --> 00:37:47.880
Yeah, something like that. There's always some sort of strange
889
00:37:47.960 --> 00:37:48.980
catalyst for it, isn't there?
890
00:37:49.340 --> 00:37:49.679
Yeah.
891
00:37:50.179 --> 00:37:52.800
Do you think your son will, well, obviously two of
892
00:37:52.820 --> 00:37:54.920
your kids are too young, but would your 12-year-old, will
893
00:37:54.960 --> 00:37:56.699
he read the book now, do you think?
894
00:37:57.530 --> 00:37:59.619
He wants to. He keeps saying, oh, can I have one?
895
00:37:59.639 --> 00:38:02.820
Can I have one? His mum has got one. She
896
00:38:02.860 --> 00:38:04.340
got the album because I signed it. She said, well,
897
00:38:04.360 --> 00:38:06.380
you signed it. I said, yeah, I wrote all the best.
898
00:38:10.400 --> 00:38:13.679
All the best, Nick. I don't know. Maybe he's not
899
00:38:13.739 --> 00:38:16.579
quite ready yet. And I think it would be more
900
00:38:16.739 --> 00:38:19.570
questions than answers. Yeah. As much as you want to
901
00:38:19.610 --> 00:38:24.650
introduce your children and not hide things like addiction and alcoholism, personally,
902
00:38:24.710 --> 00:38:27.880
I feel like you have to just start to sprinkle
903
00:38:27.929 --> 00:38:29.519
it in from now-ish.
904
00:38:29.980 --> 00:38:32.139
Did they meet your parents then? Did they meet their grandparents?
905
00:38:32.300 --> 00:38:34.679
No, my dad died 12 years ago and my mum
906
00:38:34.699 --> 00:38:36.159
died almost 20 years ago.
907
00:38:36.539 --> 00:38:37.840
If they've never met them, they've got no sort of
908
00:38:38.079 --> 00:38:39.969
memory of them, but it's quite young to introduce that
909
00:38:40.010 --> 00:38:41.190
kind of stuff, isn't it, I suppose?
910
00:38:41.849 --> 00:38:44.050
Yeah, totally. But part of that book is there are
911
00:38:44.070 --> 00:38:46.409
things that my mum cooked that I cooked and it
912
00:38:46.449 --> 00:38:49.840
tastes exactly the same. And now they eat and love it.
913
00:38:49.929 --> 00:38:54.329
So it's like, well, this is what your grandmother was. Yes,
914
00:38:54.369 --> 00:38:57.389
she was also these things, but she was also a
915
00:38:58.469 --> 00:39:02.829
great cook who at times wanted to spiritually and physically
916
00:39:03.130 --> 00:39:03.630
nourish us.
917
00:39:04.250 --> 00:39:06.329
It's like an heirloom almost, a recipe, isn't it? Of like,
918
00:39:06.630 --> 00:39:08.750
this is what your grandparents... And if they cook that
919
00:39:08.769 --> 00:39:10.440
for their kids, it's sort of a connection, isn't it?
920
00:39:11.190 --> 00:39:13.010
Yeah, it's like a time machine. It's like looking at
921
00:39:13.070 --> 00:39:17.699
old Polaroids and being able to actually physically feel... what
922
00:39:17.739 --> 00:39:19.750
you felt when that Polaroid was taken.
923
00:39:20.429 --> 00:39:22.570
My nan had a lemonade recipe that was supposed to
924
00:39:22.590 --> 00:39:24.590
be amazing and everyone banged on about it. And then
925
00:39:24.610 --> 00:39:26.750
they tried to get the recipe off her before she died,
926
00:39:26.769 --> 00:39:28.130
but she refused to tell anyone.
927
00:39:29.110 --> 00:39:34.449
That's amazing. I mean, that's gone.
928
00:39:34.829 --> 00:39:37.469
But in a way, she's preserved the mystery because no
929
00:39:37.550 --> 00:39:40.090
one can ever go, no, I don't think that lemonade
930
00:39:40.139 --> 00:39:43.179
was that good. The lemonade now tastes better than it
931
00:39:43.280 --> 00:39:45.260
ever did when it existed, if you know what I mean,
932
00:39:45.280 --> 00:39:47.420
because it's got these mythical qualities.
933
00:39:47.760 --> 00:39:49.519
Maybe she had an ego where she didn't want anyone
934
00:39:49.559 --> 00:39:51.300
to take the glory for what she'd made.
935
00:39:51.940 --> 00:39:52.199
Wow.
936
00:39:52.699 --> 00:39:53.159
Exactly.
937
00:39:53.320 --> 00:39:57.840
Honestly, I'm glad she's gone. LAUGHTER I'm glad she's gone, Rob.
938
00:39:57.849 --> 00:40:02.130
LAUGHTER Yeah, for that kind of attitude, you're right. I
939
00:40:02.230 --> 00:40:02.869
agree with you.
940
00:40:02.889 --> 00:40:04.710
Keep your fucking lemonade.
941
00:40:08.730 --> 00:40:11.409
Your fucking teeth-rotting lemonade. Fuck off with it.
942
00:40:11.829 --> 00:40:13.909
Were your children fussy when they were small? I mean,
943
00:40:13.929 --> 00:40:16.170
two of them still are, but, like, obviously a lot
944
00:40:16.190 --> 00:40:19.349
of people struggle with getting their kids to eat, like,
945
00:40:19.429 --> 00:40:22.190
interesting things or, like, be interested in food.
946
00:40:22.780 --> 00:40:26.980
My two-year-old is, I mean this in like the most
947
00:40:27.119 --> 00:40:31.179
loving way, but she's a big fat hog and she'll
948
00:40:31.219 --> 00:40:36.369
eat anything she's given. She loves it. Sometimes we've sat together,
949
00:40:36.389 --> 00:40:40.210
me and her, for like 90 minutes and just grazed
950
00:40:40.469 --> 00:40:44.510
through food. She loves it. She trusts it and she
951
00:40:44.570 --> 00:40:48.360
really enjoys it. Now, my five-year-old, he went through a
952
00:40:48.400 --> 00:40:51.920
phase of really loving stuff Now he doesn't love stuff
953
00:40:51.960 --> 00:40:55.980
as much, although secretly he does, but he's coming round.
954
00:40:56.019 --> 00:40:59.199
You can see him starting to now want to sit
955
00:40:59.239 --> 00:41:01.360
and want to eat and want to enjoy everything again.
956
00:41:01.949 --> 00:41:05.429
And my 12-year-old again went through that phase of loved everything,
957
00:41:06.150 --> 00:41:10.489
doesn't trust anything, but now he's being 12. He's really nice, actually,
958
00:41:10.510 --> 00:41:14.050
because when we're together and we're cooking, I'm always keen.
959
00:41:14.130 --> 00:41:17.269
All the kids, if I'm cooking something with a nice,
960
00:41:17.309 --> 00:41:21.239
rich gravy in it, I'll always be offering them little
961
00:41:21.300 --> 00:41:25.019
spoons of gravy, literally every time they walk through the kitchen.
962
00:41:25.539 --> 00:41:28.019
And I often find that that is a way of
963
00:41:28.079 --> 00:41:31.300
getting them to eat because they feel they've been part
964
00:41:31.320 --> 00:41:32.159
of its creation.
965
00:41:32.440 --> 00:41:34.239
They've done it. At least give it a try, won't they?
966
00:41:34.840 --> 00:41:38.480
Yeah. I mean, they're really good. I mean, my five-year-old
967
00:41:38.519 --> 00:41:41.300
does a thing where I have to keep my lid
968
00:41:41.420 --> 00:41:43.420
on because I realise they're not doing it to upset
969
00:41:43.460 --> 00:41:46.559
me personally. I made something and it was like a
970
00:41:46.619 --> 00:41:52.289
fucking three-hour braise. And it was just absolutely delicious. And
971
00:41:52.309 --> 00:41:55.329
we called my little boy to the table. It was
972
00:41:55.369 --> 00:41:58.090
really comedically really beautiful because he did a thing where
973
00:41:58.139 --> 00:42:01.940
he got about a metre away. Then he rocked forward
974
00:42:02.079 --> 00:42:04.340
on one foot and looked. And then he rocked back
975
00:42:04.400 --> 00:42:12.239
and went, nope. And then just... He doesn't mean it,
976
00:42:12.269 --> 00:42:15.090
you know. And I know full well that in like
977
00:42:15.170 --> 00:42:19.250
an hour's time when the pressure... is off because i
978
00:42:19.289 --> 00:42:22.309
think sometimes kids don't like that pressure of now we're
979
00:42:22.329 --> 00:42:25.449
all sitting and eating i know that he will come
980
00:42:25.510 --> 00:42:28.639
back and that plate will be completely finished i.
981
00:42:28.599 --> 00:42:30.519
Think there's pressure though isn't it like when you're an
982
00:42:30.559 --> 00:42:32.599
adult sometimes i go around someone's house and they serve
983
00:42:32.619 --> 00:42:34.719
something up and i'm like fuck that but you're like
984
00:42:34.739 --> 00:42:36.519
no you must eat it because you're at someone's house
985
00:42:36.800 --> 00:42:37.780
and they've cooked it for.
986
00:42:37.659 --> 00:42:40.440
You you gotta be polite well do you.
987
00:42:40.760 --> 00:42:41.909
Well no you can't just go i don't like the
988
00:42:41.929 --> 00:42:43.969
look of that fuck off at someone's house can you
989
00:42:44.230 --> 00:42:44.550
do you.
990
00:42:45.750 --> 00:42:48.079
Well, listen, I think the thing about being a really
991
00:42:48.159 --> 00:42:50.599
good cook is you actually don't get invited many places
992
00:42:50.639 --> 00:42:54.000
to eat. Right. Because people, I think, think there's a
993
00:42:54.039 --> 00:42:56.119
lot of pressure to get it right. But that said,
994
00:42:56.139 --> 00:42:57.659
we went out Sunday and we got a mate of
995
00:42:57.739 --> 00:43:00.820
ours who's a chef and it was just amazing. Just delicious.
996
00:43:00.840 --> 00:43:03.530
The kids ate, everyone ate. It was really nice. Really
997
00:43:03.570 --> 00:43:04.670
nice treat to not have to cook.
998
00:43:04.690 --> 00:43:06.190
Are you tempted to open a restaurant?
999
00:43:06.969 --> 00:43:10.070
No, it's too much. I worked in commercial kitchens when
1000
00:43:10.130 --> 00:43:12.389
I was, like, in my early 20s, and it's fucking
1001
00:43:12.429 --> 00:43:15.820
hard work. It sounds like, yeah, let's open a restaurant,
1002
00:43:15.860 --> 00:43:19.820
but it's like, I'm up at 5 a.m. buying fish.
1003
00:43:20.059 --> 00:43:22.780
It's like, fuck.
1004
00:43:23.019 --> 00:43:25.639
Unless you wanted to do something which was, I mean,
1005
00:43:25.940 --> 00:43:28.550
what's in my mind at this point is, and loads
1006
00:43:28.619 --> 00:43:30.809
of people are doing it, but, like, 10 years ago,
1007
00:43:30.829 --> 00:43:35.190
I was like, let's just fucking do cheeseburgers. Just, like, mashburgers.
1008
00:43:35.780 --> 00:43:39.039
American cheese, onions, and really good buns. It's so simple.
1009
00:43:39.659 --> 00:43:40.280
That'd be a hit.
1010
00:43:40.699 --> 00:43:42.559
I did want to do a thing, and I think
1011
00:43:42.599 --> 00:43:45.440
someone's done it, but like in the summer, you get
1012
00:43:45.599 --> 00:43:48.059
ice cream vans. But I wanted to do a thing
1013
00:43:48.099 --> 00:43:51.739
in the winter. You get roast dinner vans. So it
1014
00:43:51.780 --> 00:43:54.800
comes around, and you get like a cone of Yorkshire pudding,
1015
00:43:55.409 --> 00:43:59.909
and then you can have like roast potatoes, carrots, cheesy leeks,
1016
00:44:00.550 --> 00:44:03.030
and then you just get gravy on top. So it's
1017
00:44:03.050 --> 00:44:05.429
like a roast dinner, but in a cone. Yep.
1018
00:44:05.789 --> 00:44:07.909
Loads of people do burgers. Burger King and McDonald's can
1019
00:44:07.929 --> 00:44:09.050
survive together.
1020
00:44:09.690 --> 00:44:11.369
Yeah, McDonald's becoming very popular.
1021
00:44:14.469 --> 00:44:15.949
Nick, there's a couple of things I wanted to ask
1022
00:44:15.969 --> 00:44:17.969
you from the book. You said you cook with a
1023
00:44:18.010 --> 00:44:20.289
helmet on, is that correct? Like a crash helmet.
1024
00:44:21.090 --> 00:44:21.570
Not at all.
1025
00:44:22.289 --> 00:44:25.840
No, that's just bollocks for the pub.
1026
00:44:26.159 --> 00:44:27.619
Where's this play in the book, I cook with a
1027
00:44:27.679 --> 00:44:28.219
helmet on?
1028
00:44:28.760 --> 00:44:31.059
It says it in the cell that we got sent
1029
00:44:31.099 --> 00:44:31.719
in the email.
1030
00:44:32.380 --> 00:44:34.000
Maybe if I'm cooking bombs.
1031
00:44:34.500 --> 00:44:35.599
To read what it says?
1032
00:44:36.179 --> 00:44:36.760
Yeah, go on.
1033
00:44:36.940 --> 00:44:38.719
It talks about your mum and the stroganoff and you
1034
00:44:38.880 --> 00:44:40.179
having to make it. And then it says, now as
1035
00:44:40.219 --> 00:44:42.260
a parent himself, he wants his kids to have a
1036
00:44:42.300 --> 00:44:44.349
different relationship with food, whether it's waking up to smell
1037
00:44:44.369 --> 00:44:45.909
of fresh bread. Does that happen?
1038
00:44:46.489 --> 00:44:46.710
Yes.
1039
00:44:47.210 --> 00:44:50.449
Good, correct. Or understanding that dad will wear a helmet
1040
00:44:50.469 --> 00:44:52.110
when he cooks so he doesn't have to listen to them.
1041
00:44:52.130 --> 00:44:55.710
I don't wear a fucking helmet. I've got little earbuds
1042
00:44:55.809 --> 00:44:56.409
that I put in.
1043
00:44:58.190 --> 00:44:59.210
That's what I do.
1044
00:44:59.250 --> 00:45:02.690
The sound of children's laughter is sometimes so hateful to
1045
00:45:02.730 --> 00:45:07.349
me that I've got little headphones in and stuff.
1046
00:45:07.630 --> 00:45:09.530
Not a helmet, though. Where's helmet come from?
1047
00:45:09.550 --> 00:45:10.599
Fucking helmet.
1048
00:45:10.619 --> 00:45:10.940
It's weird.
1049
00:45:10.980 --> 00:45:13.400
I didn't write that. Someone's, the publishers, yeah.
1050
00:45:13.440 --> 00:45:16.179
Spicing it up. I'm surprised Alex Jones didn't ask you
1051
00:45:16.199 --> 00:45:17.260
on the one show about the helmet.
1052
00:45:17.659 --> 00:45:19.239
So you wear the helmet when you cook, Nick.
1053
00:45:19.519 --> 00:45:20.880
Maybe you had it on on the show, which is
1054
00:45:20.900 --> 00:45:21.679
why you look nervous.
1055
00:45:21.719 --> 00:45:25.539
That said now, I feel like maybe I should develop
1056
00:45:25.579 --> 00:45:26.320
a cooking helmet.
1057
00:45:26.840 --> 00:45:29.619
Well, with headphones in and then like onions, you could
1058
00:45:29.639 --> 00:45:31.260
pull the visor down so you don't cry.
1059
00:45:31.739 --> 00:45:34.260
That's a great idea. Also, you could just smash the
1060
00:45:34.280 --> 00:45:36.900
fuck out of garlic simply by headbutting it.
1061
00:45:36.920 --> 00:45:40.480
Yeah, and radios that don't work. Just headbutt them at
1062
00:45:40.500 --> 00:45:41.239
the end of the garden.
1063
00:45:41.440 --> 00:45:45.360
Yeah, any kind of meat you want tenderised, smash it up.
1064
00:45:45.570 --> 00:45:48.250
Or on your chin, get a rolling pin. Fucking roll
1065
00:45:48.289 --> 00:45:50.809
it out of your chin, give it a networking.
1066
00:45:50.889 --> 00:45:54.690
Guys, this is great. Let's split this three ways.
1067
00:45:54.869 --> 00:45:57.030
Why don't you ask Nick about the Joe Frost thing
1068
00:45:57.050 --> 00:45:59.349
that we found when we were Googling Nick's credits?
1069
00:46:00.329 --> 00:46:02.219
Your IMDB says Supernanny.
1070
00:46:02.639 --> 00:46:02.840
Yes.
1071
00:46:03.880 --> 00:46:06.139
Are you any relationship to Joe Frost, Supernanny?
1072
00:46:06.800 --> 00:46:10.039
No, it was just a weird... There was things years
1073
00:46:10.079 --> 00:46:12.539
ago when I did it, like, we were married. She
1074
00:46:12.559 --> 00:46:14.929
was my first wife. It's like, no, it's happened to
1075
00:46:14.949 --> 00:46:16.570
be Frost. I've never even met her.
1076
00:46:17.090 --> 00:46:18.210
So was you on Supernanny?
1077
00:46:18.230 --> 00:46:22.039
No. I did the voiceover. Everything good I know about
1078
00:46:22.389 --> 00:46:26.250
children comes from voicing three seasons of Supernanny.
1079
00:46:27.130 --> 00:46:28.869
And do you use any of her techniques?
1080
00:46:29.449 --> 00:46:30.010
Cooking helmet.
1081
00:46:30.610 --> 00:46:35.260
Cooking helmet? No, I mean, I'd never like that, putting
1082
00:46:35.280 --> 00:46:37.719
them on a naughty step thing, because it just seemed like...
1083
00:46:38.159 --> 00:46:40.300
It's fine if they stay there, but if they don't,
1084
00:46:40.320 --> 00:46:43.440
then you've got that really horrible thing where sometimes when
1085
00:46:43.500 --> 00:46:46.500
kids just completely lose their fit and you just have
1086
00:46:46.519 --> 00:46:49.400
to hold them until the fight goes out. I was like,
1087
00:46:49.760 --> 00:46:52.559
this doesn't feel right. You know what I mean? Yeah.
1088
00:46:52.579 --> 00:46:54.059
I think it's called restraining.
1089
00:46:54.860 --> 00:46:55.340
Yeah.
1090
00:46:55.380 --> 00:46:58.380
Don't get me wrong. I mean, I definitely have sometimes
1091
00:46:58.440 --> 00:47:02.739
when my little five-year-old is like beginning to smash stuff
1092
00:47:02.840 --> 00:47:06.590
up because he's so angry and He's just like, I'm
1093
00:47:06.670 --> 00:47:08.730
now going to just hold you for a bit because
1094
00:47:08.829 --> 00:47:10.150
I feel like you're going to hurt yourself.
1095
00:47:10.869 --> 00:47:13.929
Any other tips from Supernanny, Nick, that you picked up, really?
1096
00:47:14.309 --> 00:47:18.239
You know what? It's always the parents. Really? Yeah, because,
1097
00:47:18.300 --> 00:47:21.079
I mean, a two-year-old's not just born a little *
1098
00:47:20.840 --> 00:47:27.860
* * *, is he? His parents have done that
1099
00:47:27.900 --> 00:47:28.420
to him. 100%. So.
1100
00:47:31.090 --> 00:47:33.599
I think there's lots to be learned there by whatever
1101
00:47:33.639 --> 00:47:35.920
those parents do, just don't do that.
1102
00:47:36.219 --> 00:47:38.460
When you're doing the voiceover on something like Supernanny, are
1103
00:47:38.519 --> 00:47:40.380
you sat there watching the whole episode or are you
1104
00:47:40.400 --> 00:47:41.519
just blasting through it?
1105
00:47:42.019 --> 00:47:44.619
Yeah, I'm just blasting through it, doing like 10 episodes
1106
00:47:44.659 --> 00:47:48.300
a day. So unless there's like a really compelling storyline
1107
00:47:48.340 --> 00:47:49.920
and I'm like, oh, hang on, can we watch this bit?
1108
00:47:50.320 --> 00:47:57.159
Yeah. My question for you, Nick, is in space, where
1109
00:47:57.199 --> 00:48:00.639
was the house exactly? And does it get people who
1110
00:48:00.679 --> 00:48:03.719
go to it now as a kind of like Abbey
1111
00:48:03.780 --> 00:48:05.400
Road zebra crossing?
1112
00:48:05.960 --> 00:48:10.989
Okay, so the house is in like Islington, Tufnell Park area.
1113
00:48:12.070 --> 00:48:18.119
And really weirdly... My best mate and his family live
1114
00:48:18.159 --> 00:48:19.000
in that house now.
1115
00:48:19.320 --> 00:48:20.699
No. No, that's weird.
1116
00:48:20.860 --> 00:48:23.519
It came out for sale about five years ago and
1117
00:48:24.039 --> 00:48:25.949
they said, yeah, we'll have it. They didn't, I mean,
1118
00:48:26.530 --> 00:48:28.210
not big fans of space, but they bought the house
1119
00:48:28.230 --> 00:48:31.469
because it's beautiful and massive. So sometimes if I'm going
1120
00:48:31.489 --> 00:48:34.889
to see him and then like there are people outside
1121
00:48:34.969 --> 00:48:38.510
taking pictures, like Mike from space comes out of the
1122
00:48:38.550 --> 00:48:44.710
space house. Which is kind of weird for people. But, yeah,
1123
00:48:44.750 --> 00:48:47.250
my mate Danny and his wife Vicky and their family
1124
00:48:47.289 --> 00:48:47.650
bought it.
1125
00:48:48.329 --> 00:48:50.269
And when it was listed, did it say, this is
1126
00:48:50.309 --> 00:48:52.730
the house from Spaced? Did they know what they were doing?
1127
00:48:52.769 --> 00:48:54.769
I mean, the lady that was there was the lady
1128
00:48:54.809 --> 00:48:58.610
that was there when we shot there. So she was like, oh, well,
1129
00:48:58.630 --> 00:49:01.349
we shot a TV show here. And I think Danny
1130
00:49:01.369 --> 00:49:02.550
was a bit stum about it.
1131
00:49:02.550 --> 00:49:04.389
Well, he's lucky for the sale that it was called
1132
00:49:04.429 --> 00:49:05.530
Spaced rather than Cramped.
1133
00:49:06.510 --> 00:49:08.449
Oh, that's good. That's lovely, Rob.
1134
00:49:08.780 --> 00:49:09.389
Haunted.
1135
00:49:09.590 --> 00:49:10.320
Yeah, haunted.
1136
00:49:11.000 --> 00:49:14.260
Whenever we go and see houses... It's just to make
1137
00:49:14.280 --> 00:49:18.010
my girlfriend laugh, but quietly I'll pull the estate agent
1138
00:49:18.050 --> 00:49:20.570
to one side and I'll say, is it? haunted? Do
1139
00:49:22.230 --> 00:49:24.789
you know what I mean? And they're never sure what
1140
00:49:24.829 --> 00:49:27.349
to make. And I'll always ask how much the house weighs.
1141
00:49:27.789 --> 00:49:31.820
And again, they're like, oh, I'll have to check that
1142
00:49:31.860 --> 00:49:36.530
for you. I'm like, all right, okay. LAUGHTER The other
1143
00:49:36.550 --> 00:49:38.110
thing I do to make my partner laugh is when
1144
00:49:38.130 --> 00:49:40.769
we check in. When we're flying to, like, LA or somewhere,
1145
00:49:41.250 --> 00:49:43.590
I really quietly say to the lady who checks us in,
1146
00:49:44.250 --> 00:49:49.260
are there toilets on board? But you never use the
1147
00:49:49.300 --> 00:49:53.539
plane missile.
1148
00:49:54.460 --> 00:49:57.099
I can't believe that about Spaced. Your friends bought it.
1149
00:49:57.139 --> 00:49:58.639
That's an incredible coincidence.
1150
00:49:58.699 --> 00:49:59.800
Yes, it's great.
1151
00:50:00.139 --> 00:50:01.139
It's your sunwatch, Spaced.
1152
00:50:02.769 --> 00:50:03.670
Honestly, I just.
1153
00:50:03.690 --> 00:50:07.699
12-year-olds like KSI and Prime drinks, Josh, not sitcoms.
1154
00:50:07.889 --> 00:50:10.599
I just can't believe that times have changed this much.
1155
00:50:11.139 --> 00:50:13.099
There's not much they can see. A lot of it's
1156
00:50:13.159 --> 00:50:16.760
like there's a decapitation or... I did like six films
1157
00:50:16.800 --> 00:50:18.539
last year all back to back and I was like,
1158
00:50:18.719 --> 00:50:21.860
half the time I was just covered in gore. I'm like, oh,
1159
00:50:22.429 --> 00:50:25.829
more fucking films my kids can't see. But there'll be
1160
00:50:25.849 --> 00:50:27.349
a time in there, you know, 18, 19, 20, where
1161
00:50:27.369 --> 00:50:30.989
you're like, oh, there's 50 films here that Dad made.
1162
00:50:31.010 --> 00:50:33.030
Let's have a look. Or let's just bin them.
1163
00:50:33.590 --> 00:50:36.750
Is there anything you would do if your kid said, look,
1164
00:50:36.949 --> 00:50:38.969
I know it's going to be embarrassing, but we really
1165
00:50:39.010 --> 00:50:40.170
want you to do Strictly?
1166
00:50:41.389 --> 00:50:46.710
Oh, no way. Fuck them. I did a film called
1167
00:50:46.769 --> 00:50:49.150
Cuban Fury years ago about a dancer and then I
1168
00:50:49.170 --> 00:50:52.210
got offered Strictly off the back of that. And I
1169
00:50:52.210 --> 00:50:56.980
was like, no. But also for Strictly, I've noticed over
1170
00:50:57.019 --> 00:51:00.320
the last however many years I've been watching it, They
1171
00:51:00.440 --> 00:51:04.849
don't know how to dress fat people. They always end
1172
00:51:04.909 --> 00:51:08.090
up wearing, like, just a big glittery blouse and they
1173
00:51:08.150 --> 00:51:10.070
end up looking like a big fat egg.
1174
00:51:11.230 --> 00:51:13.949
How would you dress the fat people on Strictly? There's
1175
00:51:13.989 --> 00:51:16.309
a question I didn't think I'd be asking on this interview.
1176
00:51:16.829 --> 00:51:20.960
I wouldn't. I'd just let them be naked.
1177
00:51:21.019 --> 00:51:23.739
Really long jeans at the bottom and rip the shirt
1178
00:51:23.780 --> 00:51:24.239
off at the end.
1179
00:51:24.579 --> 00:51:27.349
Ha! Tickers and long jeans at the bottom and then
1180
00:51:27.389 --> 00:51:29.190
they have to tear the jeans off and there's like
1181
00:51:29.230 --> 00:51:30.349
big gold pants underneath.
1182
00:51:30.369 --> 00:51:33.239
Definitely not doing Strictly even if the kids wanted it.
1183
00:51:34.030 --> 00:51:34.989
Never. Really?
1184
00:51:35.090 --> 00:51:37.190
Even the Christmas special, it's only one day of filming,
1185
00:51:37.449 --> 00:51:38.300
two days of filming.
1186
00:51:38.969 --> 00:51:39.360
Dick it.
1187
00:51:39.489 --> 00:51:39.880
Fuck it.
1188
00:51:40.139 --> 00:51:40.599
Fair enough.
1189
00:51:41.739 --> 00:51:43.380
Shall we ask the final question, Josh, unless you've got
1190
00:51:43.420 --> 00:51:44.239
anything else you want to ask?
1191
00:51:44.280 --> 00:51:45.429
Yeah, do it, Rob, do it.
1192
00:51:45.639 --> 00:51:47.099
You want to ask anything about Shaun of the Dead
1193
00:51:47.139 --> 00:51:50.059
or Hot Fuzz, like an absolute cliched 40-year-old?
1194
00:51:51.070 --> 00:51:54.789
I'm just interested in people's careers. Yeah, I know.
1195
00:51:54.809 --> 00:51:57.409
Nick don't want to talk about fucking space anymore, do you, Nick?
1196
00:51:57.909 --> 00:51:59.090
Are you only 40, Josh?
1197
00:51:59.670 --> 00:52:00.530
I'm 40, yeah.
1198
00:52:01.349 --> 00:52:02.349
It's fucking terrible.
1199
00:52:08.769 --> 00:52:11.030
Nick, the final question that we always ask everyone is,
1200
00:52:11.449 --> 00:52:14.289
what one thing your partner does parenting-wise that you're in
1201
00:52:14.389 --> 00:52:17.110
awe of and you think, wow, she's amazing? Couldn't do
1202
00:52:17.130 --> 00:52:19.449
this without her. And what is one thing that she
1203
00:52:19.489 --> 00:52:22.010
does where you go, that fucking annoys me? And if
1204
00:52:22.050 --> 00:52:24.389
she was listening, she might go, fair enough, I get
1205
00:52:24.409 --> 00:52:24.789
your point.
1206
00:52:25.710 --> 00:52:28.389
Let's say from the get-go, she wouldn't ever say, oh,
1207
00:52:28.429 --> 00:52:33.039
fair enough, I get your point. Right, sure. This is
1208
00:52:33.079 --> 00:52:35.760
just going to be a general thing, but she's just
1209
00:52:35.840 --> 00:52:37.900
an amazing mum. Do you know what I mean? She's
1210
00:52:38.099 --> 00:52:43.289
so calm and she's really patient. Just really gentle, you
1211
00:52:43.309 --> 00:52:46.469
know what I mean? She's just great. I literally have
1212
00:52:46.510 --> 00:52:49.309
no downside to her. But the ick point, the ick
1213
00:52:49.369 --> 00:52:53.340
bit would be, we're all busy, I get it. But
1214
00:52:53.380 --> 00:52:55.300
if I'm saying to you, oh, could you help me
1215
00:52:55.360 --> 00:52:58.420
just doing that thing? And then she'll, like, hold a
1216
00:52:58.440 --> 00:53:04.559
jumper up. She'll say, you know, I'm folding the children's jumpers. Yeah,
1217
00:53:04.619 --> 00:53:06.920
I get it. You've got kids. I get we've got kids.
1218
00:53:08.110 --> 00:53:11.210
You don't have to weaponise the kids just to... be
1219
00:53:11.269 --> 00:53:14.440
a bit fucking lazy. It's like, well, can you help me?
1220
00:53:14.500 --> 00:53:17.579
I'm making dinner for 15 people. Can you not just
1221
00:53:17.619 --> 00:53:19.659
put that jumper down a second and just grab a
1222
00:53:19.699 --> 00:53:22.900
bit of milk? You know we've got kids, Nick?
1223
00:53:25.590 --> 00:53:28.230
You want to do your fucking braids? We've got kids, actually,
1224
00:53:28.250 --> 00:53:29.949
that have got jumpers.
1225
00:53:29.989 --> 00:53:32.889
Yeah, I'm having to do four different meals because you're
1226
00:53:32.929 --> 00:53:34.570
a fucking veggie.
1227
00:53:37.110 --> 00:53:38.070
I think that's a fair point.
1228
00:53:38.320 --> 00:53:40.460
Everyone's got little things that frustrate them.
1229
00:53:40.480 --> 00:53:42.530
Definitely. She's amazing, you know. Brilliant.
1230
00:53:42.570 --> 00:53:45.610
Nick, good luck with the book, A Slice of Fried Gold,
1231
00:53:45.869 --> 00:53:49.030
part memoir, part cookbook. Is it out now? When's it out?
1232
00:53:49.050 --> 00:53:49.869
It is, yeah.
1233
00:53:49.889 --> 00:53:51.289
It came out last Thursday.
1234
00:53:51.570 --> 00:53:51.989
Lovely.
1235
00:53:52.300 --> 00:53:58.719
Sure, there's 1.8 million copies left. But listen, I really
1236
00:53:58.780 --> 00:54:00.460
appreciate you having me. Thank you so much.
1237
00:54:00.480 --> 00:54:01.929
No, it's been an honour to have you on.
1238
00:54:01.949 --> 00:54:02.590
We love you. Thanks, Nick.
1239
00:54:02.610 --> 00:54:03.269
It's been a joy.
1240
00:54:06.000 --> 00:54:06.940
Oh, Nick Frost there.
1241
00:54:07.260 --> 00:54:09.400
What a lovely bloke. Really nice.
1242
00:54:09.619 --> 00:54:12.760
We did what we'd said we'd do. We introduced him previously,
1243
00:54:12.820 --> 00:54:15.590
telling everyone what he's been in and done. Then we
1244
00:54:15.619 --> 00:54:17.309
asked him about the helmet, which was a good thing
1245
00:54:17.349 --> 00:54:18.550
to bring up because it's not true.
1246
00:54:18.610 --> 00:54:18.769
Yep.
1247
00:54:19.530 --> 00:54:23.090
Also, Rob... Don't beat yourself up about slice of fired
1248
00:54:23.139 --> 00:54:24.900
gold because the typo's in the email.
1249
00:54:24.920 --> 00:54:27.360
Thank you very much. I thought the old dyslexia getting me,
1250
00:54:27.380 --> 00:54:29.119
but actually it's just been written wrong. So I don't
1251
00:54:29.139 --> 00:54:31.420
know whether to sack Michael or the person that sent
1252
00:54:31.460 --> 00:54:31.820
it to him.
1253
00:54:32.119 --> 00:54:34.949
Could I just say the thought that Michael has intercepted
1254
00:54:35.010 --> 00:54:36.889
the email on the way to us and added the
1255
00:54:36.929 --> 00:54:39.170
helmet bit to try and fuck up the interview.
1256
00:54:39.949 --> 00:54:41.630
I mean, yeah, I know how busy Michael is and
1257
00:54:41.650 --> 00:54:45.409
I doubt he's going back to spell PR blurbs incorrectly.
1258
00:54:46.050 --> 00:54:48.960
Because I'd say Michael does send emails, but I'd say
1259
00:54:48.980 --> 00:54:50.619
they're quite copy and paste heavy.
1260
00:54:51.079 --> 00:54:53.360
Yeah, I'd say that's a copy and paste that email.
1261
00:54:53.500 --> 00:54:54.559
Is that a copy and paste, Michael?
1262
00:54:54.800 --> 00:54:58.289
It would be really funny if after, what, three years
1263
00:54:58.329 --> 00:55:00.210
of doing this and never once giving you any kind
1264
00:55:00.230 --> 00:55:02.869
of bios, Just to test whether you'd read it, I
1265
00:55:02.909 --> 00:55:05.110
dropped in a random fact about Nick Frost cooking in
1266
00:55:05.130 --> 00:55:07.469
a helmet just to go, let's see if they'll bring
1267
00:55:07.489 --> 00:55:08.320
this bullshit up.
1268
00:55:09.039 --> 00:55:09.559
Really?
1269
00:55:09.579 --> 00:55:11.199
I mean, I didn't do that, but it would have
1270
00:55:11.239 --> 00:55:14.039
been great. Oh, that would have been great.
1271
00:55:14.119 --> 00:55:16.280
A couple of typos. That's what Elon Musk did to
1272
00:55:16.320 --> 00:55:19.179
find out who was leaking information. They sent out the
1273
00:55:19.239 --> 00:55:22.380
same email to about a thousand people, but they changed
1274
00:55:22.440 --> 00:55:25.500
certain bits in it slightly so that they could tell
1275
00:55:25.739 --> 00:55:26.909
who'd copied and pasted it.
1276
00:55:27.909 --> 00:55:28.610
Oh, that's clever.
1277
00:55:28.650 --> 00:55:30.789
So every email was actually, there was this one little
1278
00:55:30.849 --> 00:55:32.360
thing in the email, in the body of it, where
1279
00:55:32.380 --> 00:55:34.079
it was like an extra space or a typo, and
1280
00:55:34.239 --> 00:55:36.380
every single email was slightly different.
1281
00:55:37.000 --> 00:55:39.079
Oh, it's not a million miles off Colleen Rooney.
1282
00:55:39.219 --> 00:55:41.280
A lot of people say Elon Musk, Colleen Rooney and
1283
00:55:41.320 --> 00:55:42.960
Michael Marden are very similar people.
1284
00:55:43.360 --> 00:55:46.269
Very similar. I wouldn't want to cross any of them.
1285
00:55:47.170 --> 00:55:50.869
Nick Frost's book, A Slice of Fried Stoke-Fired Gold. Is
1286
00:55:51.130 --> 00:55:53.489
out now. We'll be back on Tuesday.
1287
00:55:53.789 --> 00:55:55.230
Yes, I'll see you on Tuesday, Josh.
1288
00:55:55.389 --> 00:55:55.949
I'll see you then.
1289
00:55:56.190 --> 00:55:56.489
Bye.
1290
00:55:59.909 --> 00:56:04.699
Hello, I'm Charles Brandreth. What's the very first thing you remember?
1291
00:56:05.320 --> 00:56:08.340
That's the question I'll be asking my famous and fascinating
1292
00:56:08.380 --> 00:56:13.309
guests in Rosebud, my new podcast about first memories and
1293
00:56:13.449 --> 00:56:14.650
first experiences.
1294
00:56:14.869 --> 00:56:15.929
My first memory.
1295
00:56:16.420 --> 00:56:21.860
Is handing my Auntie Muriel a piece of turd.
1296
00:56:22.099 --> 00:56:26.429
Other guests include Dame Judi Dench, Alison Hammond and Rory Stewart.
1297
00:56:26.719 --> 00:56:29.750
Download and listen wherever you get your podcasts.
1298
00:56:30.489 --> 00:56:33.409
Hello, I'm Gem Brister. And I'm Kerry Godliman.
1299
00:56:33.809 --> 00:56:36.869
And we host the brand new podcast series, Memory Lane.
1300
00:56:37.489 --> 00:56:39.829
Each week, we'll be taking a trip down Memory Lane
1301
00:56:40.110 --> 00:56:42.530
with our very special guests, as they bring in four
1302
00:56:42.570 --> 00:56:44.110
photos from their past to talk about.
1303
00:56:44.489 --> 00:56:47.369
And Jen and I will be doing new episodes every week.
1304
00:56:48.150 --> 00:56:50.110
Come on, we can all be nosy together.