Breckin Meyer asks about breakups

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Cheers.
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Hey, it's your friend Tig Notaro on The Handsome Pod.
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I'm sitting here with my co-host.
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Mae Martin.
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And Fortune Feimster.
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Oh, good.
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To see you guys. We did live recordings yesterday. I've
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been thinking a lot about them, how fun and electrifying
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that is to be in the same room with the
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loves of my life.
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I know. Getting kisses.
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I mean, we lit up. Let's be honest.
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We lit up.
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Yeah, that's my stage name is Lesbianist.
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Lesbianist.
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I am the lesbian that tells the truth.
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I like that.
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Speaking of, I do want to mention that, well... I
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did our friend Tom Papa's podcast.
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You were lesbianist on that.
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I was lesbianist.
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I know Tom Papa.
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I've done a radio show with him for the last
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five years on SiriusXM.
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Oh, you do know him.
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You know this. You've been on our show.
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But you did his own podcast.
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Yes, I did. I love Tom. I think he's one
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of the funniest comedians. He's just, he's so, I love ridiculousness.
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I know.
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He's great.
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He is a silly, silly man. Yeah.
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Well, it got picked up by the news.
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It did because, but I didn't know. That's what I
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was telling you guys before the podcast is I was
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getting texts and emails from, from friends that I was
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a little surprised, listened to Tom Pampa's podcast. One of
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the people that reached out was Lucy Lawless from the
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show Xena. And you know, she's living in, in, uh,
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New Zealand.
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New Zealand.
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Oh boy. Living on her farm. And then I, I
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get this email. I actually, I didn't even know what
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it was about at first because she was like, Did
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she start it with, hello, lesbianas?
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She sure did.
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No, she was just like, hey, Rob. That's her husband.
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She said, Rob and I are so proud of you
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for speaking out. And I honestly thought for a second
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that she... sent the wrong, like an email to the
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wrong person. And I was, I was like, I'm going
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to write her later in the day. And I kept
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getting these texts and emails like, Hey, you know, thanks
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for speaking out. And, uh, and I, Oh, Hey, I
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listened to Tom, my friend who lives in France wrote
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me and he said, Hey, um, loved you on Tom Papa's, um, uh,
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what you said on Tom Papa's show. And I was like, God,
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not that Tom isn't a loved and popular comedian or podcaster,
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but they were just friends that I was just a
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little surprised that that was their wheelhouse in podcasting. And I, meanwhile,
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later found out that my manager reached out and said,
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just so you know, Fox News reached out wanting to
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talk to you because of what you said about Cheryl
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Hines on Tom's podcast. Right.
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Because you, I mean, I feel like you've spoken around
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it on this pod or what, but this was the
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first time that you were sort of directly.
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Addressed it directly. I didn't feel like, um, I thought
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it was clear where I stood. I had a podcast
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with her. I had a long standing friendship. She was,
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you know, just a, Really important person in my life.
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I loved being ridiculous with her.
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Yeah, you guys were very funny together. It was silliness.
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And I remember, you know, I forgot that Tom listened
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to that podcast. And so when I was on his show,
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it wasn't like a setup. I didn't know he was
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going to ask me, but he was asking or brought
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up that show. And as I was talking to him,
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I was thinking, oh, right. I remember him writing me.
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From time to time about different episodes. So, but yeah,
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we would talk about a different podcast or a different
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documentary every week, but barely. We mainly just talked about
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who we were attracted to and on the documentary and.
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And then we would do live streams where we would
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slap each other in the face and take shots. It
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wasn't terribly presidential or political.
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Not political at all.
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Not in the slightest bit.
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God, that's so... It makes it so much more heartbreaking.
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Yeah.
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Because, yeah, that was such a golden moment and friendship.
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But I didn't hear what you said on Tom's.
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I didn't hear either. I don't know what was said.
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I just basically said that just that. She was one
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of my favorites and somebody I absolutely loved being silly.
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One of my favorite things to do is find a
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bit and tee somebody up to do something stupid and ridiculous. Like,
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I love to sit back and like... You know, and
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be like, oh, yeah, and how would that look?
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Entertain me. Yeah, yeah.
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And so Cheryl, I don't know. She was just a
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real bright spot in my life. And for people.
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who don't know Cheryl is married to RFK Jr. Yeah.
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Who has some wild opinions.
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Wild opinions.
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But has the power now to enact some of these things.
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To like legislate his wild opinions. Well, yeah.
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And he's also a part of an administration where they are.
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Ruining.
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There's a lot of issues that I do not believe
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in that he is endorsing that Cheryl is clearly endorsing.
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And it must have been confusing as a friend, but
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it's almost like, because I feel like initially it was,
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there was a separation of like, well, yeah, he's got
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his opinions, but you know, and then it slowly has
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become like, like sort of must be sort of validating
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that you were like, oh no, this is a problem
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because now it clearly has evolved into, you know.
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But that's, that's what I talked about on Tom's podcast
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is that, She says, you know, that we don't agree
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on everything. And I think having such a vague statement,
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you can choose to think that she really doesn't believe
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in a lot of what he's doing. But my point
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is Stephanie and I don't agree on the temperature in
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our house, but I would not frame it like Stephanie
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and I don't agree on everything.
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Right.
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You know?
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You know what I'm saying? It's, it's just, it's too
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vague and there's too much of a gap there.
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And, um, it's very strange.
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And, and, um, well, like Thomas was saying, I think
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a lot of people can relate to this of having
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someone they love in their family or a friend who's
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just sort of drifting into a pretty extreme ideology and,
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and how do you maintain a relationship and where's your,
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where do you draw the line?
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And I think, Well, and it took me, honestly, it
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took me a while to draw a line because I
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continued to reach out to Cheryl and say, you know, hey,
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I'm thinking about you. Hey, I hope you're doing okay. Hey,
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I'm sending love and I care about you. And she
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would respond really pleasantly and friendly and say, oh, thank
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you for this. And I was open to, hey, let's
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remain friendly. And yeah, this... You know, I cared about Cheryl.
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I care about Cheryl, for sure. That doesn't change. It's just,
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it's hard to pretend like it's weird that anybody's confused
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because it's a real about face. It is a real
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about face. So I, I didn't sever the friendship, but
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I did notice that once he was running for president
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and once I stepped away from our old podcast, I
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never heard from her again other than nice responses to
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me sending love when I thought maybe she needs support
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or maybe she's feeling this way or that based on
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what I knew of her.
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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So. Wow.
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So that's been your, your week is, or was it yesterday?
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You got all these messages.
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Yeah.
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I think, yeah, it just started popping up this morning.
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Yeah.
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Right.
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Well, no, I mean, for me yesterday, yesterday morning is
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I woke up to my email from Lucy Lawless and
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then I, I continued to get.
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It's a surreal sentence for me. Like that would make
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my day.
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Well, yeah, again, I was like, wow, Lucy follows Tom
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Papa's podcast. That's so cool. And then I, I did,
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I thought, I thought all these people were just listening
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to Tom's podcast. And maybe they are. But then my
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manager reached out and said, Fox News wanted to talk
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to you.
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I can't wait for you to go on Fox News.
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I can't wait.
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And then I drift into MAJA.
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You're like, actually, they had a lot of good points.
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All of a sudden, Dick's like.
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I would like to amp this other podcast back up
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with cheryl again.
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Yeah yeah well they did you know but that's the
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thing is i did i she and i had like
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a four-hour conversation and and she went through different issues
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and encouraged me to sit down with bobby and i
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was like let me think on this and then i
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woke up and i was like yeah no thank you Well, what's.
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At stake for y'all's own personal lives is very different too.
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That's what people don't really realize. It's not just the like,
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you have your opinion, I have mine. Your life is
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affected by this legislation that could.
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Yeah, when it's like fundamentally about whether you or any
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demographic should have fewer rights, then you kind of.
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Absolutely.
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Where do you go from there? Is there anything?
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Can we try and say something on the pod that
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gets picked up by Fox News?
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Is there anything? Can we throw something?
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No, thank you.
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We want to diversify our listenership.
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I don't like being in that crossfire. I've been there before.
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It's not fun.
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You're right, actually. Let's keep our heads below the parapet.
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I have gotten death threats before.
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Have you?
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Well, see, and that's the thing is when Bobby, you know,
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was running for president and then endorsed Trump and I
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was still tied to Cheryl in ways, that was the
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other issue was this isn't my world. This is not
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my world. And if you're choosing to go into that world,
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that is your business. But I have to step outside
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because I didn't know And I still don't know where
250
00:13:10.029 --> 00:13:12.690
this road is going, but it's not one that I'm
251
00:13:12.750 --> 00:13:13.389
interested in.
252
00:13:13.970 --> 00:13:17.450
Yeah, that's just not what your lane is.
253
00:13:17.669 --> 00:13:17.909
No.
254
00:13:18.110 --> 00:13:18.590
Anyway.
255
00:13:18.610 --> 00:13:18.690
Yeah.
256
00:13:18.990 --> 00:13:20.409
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
257
00:13:21.230 --> 00:13:21.629
Anyway.
258
00:13:21.649 --> 00:13:23.070
Anyhoos.
259
00:13:23.090 --> 00:13:23.509
Anyhoos.
260
00:13:23.529 --> 00:13:27.470
Does anyone else have any friends they're not doing podcasts with?
261
00:13:29.809 --> 00:13:33.029
Well, I did want to mention to you guys that
262
00:13:33.090 --> 00:13:33.549
I'm out.
263
00:13:33.840 --> 00:13:34.649
Oh, no.
264
00:13:34.750 --> 00:13:35.389
Just kidding.
265
00:13:36.500 --> 00:13:39.090
I also want to warn you guys. Remember how I
266
00:13:39.110 --> 00:13:40.049
had a droopy eyelid?
267
00:13:40.070 --> 00:13:40.710
Yes, yeah.
268
00:13:40.730 --> 00:13:41.149
Tell us about it.
269
00:13:41.169 --> 00:13:43.169
I was going to check. We wanted to check in
270
00:13:43.190 --> 00:13:43.470
on it.
271
00:13:43.490 --> 00:13:46.029
I had my three-hour doctor appointment yesterday.
272
00:13:46.049 --> 00:13:46.789
Three hours?
273
00:13:47.090 --> 00:13:47.529
Why?
274
00:13:47.549 --> 00:13:52.289
Well, because it could be very minor to a stroke
275
00:13:52.350 --> 00:13:55.460
to a tumor. So I was kind of like, oh boy,
276
00:13:55.519 --> 00:14:01.159
come on, man. Come on. And so, hey, it's all right.
277
00:14:01.240 --> 00:14:04.120
It's just the muscle. But I do have to get...
278
00:14:04.909 --> 00:14:08.320
eyelid surgery so this is going to be my first
279
00:14:08.519 --> 00:14:10.799
parlay into face work.
280
00:14:10.720 --> 00:14:16.720
Oh my god you're getting a beauty surgery yes yes.
281
00:14:16.769 --> 00:14:19.909
Hilarious do you see this this.
282
00:14:20.009 --> 00:14:23.549
Eye i hope you recover in a fancy beverly hills hotel.
283
00:14:23.710 --> 00:14:25.769
It's going to take me a couple of weeks to recover,
284
00:14:25.789 --> 00:14:28.529
but there are going to be before and after pictures.
285
00:14:28.590 --> 00:14:32.700
Will you please do a podcast in one eye?
286
00:14:33.000 --> 00:14:37.519
No, I'm going to do a plastic surgery podcast as
287
00:14:37.700 --> 00:14:38.639
like an expert.
288
00:14:40.399 --> 00:14:41.789
Does this mean you're going to be wearing an eye
289
00:14:41.830 --> 00:14:42.889
patch for a period of time?
290
00:14:43.309 --> 00:14:48.590
God they didn't say i had to but i might
291
00:14:48.669 --> 00:14:50.809
just to make it dramatic.
292
00:14:50.629 --> 00:14:52.659
Well if you do do the eye patch and the
293
00:14:52.720 --> 00:14:57.940
mustache and wait what mustache i don't have a mustache when.
294
00:14:57.799 --> 00:15:02.059
You do your mustache stop Sorry, girl.
295
00:15:02.379 --> 00:15:05.250
In solidarity, I'll wear an eye patch or I'll punch
296
00:15:05.279 --> 00:15:07.009
myself in the eye so I got a black eye.
297
00:15:07.149 --> 00:15:07.809
No, Mae.
298
00:15:07.889 --> 00:15:09.009
Yeah, do that, Mae.
299
00:15:09.230 --> 00:15:09.450
Yeah.
300
00:15:10.450 --> 00:15:12.809
Anyway, there's all my news. Let's hear yours.
301
00:15:12.889 --> 00:15:17.210
Wow. Look at you just hitting the old news circuit.
302
00:15:17.330 --> 00:15:21.210
Fox News and FaceWork. Classic Tig updates.
303
00:15:26.279 --> 00:15:29.389
Checking Allstate First could save you hundreds on car insurance.
304
00:15:29.750 --> 00:15:32.350
Not checking that I put away all my puppets before.
305
00:15:32.090 --> 00:15:34.190
Going to sleep. That's the stuff of nightmares.
306
00:15:34.690 --> 00:15:36.070
I woke up to get some water in the middle
307
00:15:36.090 --> 00:15:37.809
of the night and I thought an army of tiny
308
00:15:37.889 --> 00:15:39.490
folk had come to life in my house.
309
00:15:39.830 --> 00:15:41.210
Yeah, checking first is handsome.
310
00:15:41.590 --> 00:15:43.669
So check Allstate First for an auto quote.
311
00:15:43.840 --> 00:15:47.080
It could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate.
312
00:15:47.440 --> 00:15:50.799
Potential savings vary subject to terms, conditions, and availability. Allstate
313
00:15:50.840 --> 00:15:53.360
North American Insurance Company and affiliates Northbrook, Illinois.
314
00:15:53.919 --> 00:15:56.480
As we head into the fall, it is the perfect
315
00:15:56.519 --> 00:15:59.720
time to hit reset before the autumn rush. And for me,
316
00:15:59.940 --> 00:16:03.480
that always starts with my wardrobe. Quince proves you don't
317
00:16:03.500 --> 00:16:05.799
need a crowded closet to look incredible. You just need
318
00:16:05.820 --> 00:16:06.850
the right pieces.
319
00:16:07.399 --> 00:16:10.690
I am awful choosy about my denim, but I was
320
00:16:10.769 --> 00:16:14.450
so impressed by Quince's straight leg jeans. The best part
321
00:16:14.570 --> 00:16:17.870
was the quality, but the other best part was the price.
322
00:16:18.259 --> 00:16:22.519
Their jeans were priced at just $ 50. That's comparable to
323
00:16:22.519 --> 00:16:30.490
$ 245 at traditional retail. That's a 79% savings. Plus, you
324
00:16:30.509 --> 00:16:33.210
get an amazing pair of jeans to go with all
325
00:16:33.830 --> 00:16:37.059
your cash. I find myself reaching for my Quince jeans
326
00:16:37.259 --> 00:16:39.480
over and over again. Quince, I'm a fan.
327
00:16:40.480 --> 00:16:43.259
Find the fall pieces you'll reach for most at Quince.
328
00:16:43.460 --> 00:16:47.039
Download the Quince app for app-exclusive offers or go to quince.com
329
00:16:47.179 --> 00:16:51.240
slash handsome. Get free shipping on your order and 365-day returns.
330
00:16:51.679 --> 00:16:53.360
Now available in Canada and the.
331
00:16:53.379 --> 00:16:54.059
UK, too.
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00:16:54.360 --> 00:17:02.159
That's Q-U-I-N-C-E dot com slash handsome. My news is I
333
00:17:02.220 --> 00:17:05.430
didn't sleep very well. That's not really fun news. But
334
00:17:05.650 --> 00:17:08.890
next week I'm going to New York and I'm doing
335
00:17:09.190 --> 00:17:11.869
Drew Barrymore's show and Kelly Clarkson.
336
00:17:11.890 --> 00:17:12.630
Yeah, that's right.
337
00:17:12.650 --> 00:17:15.720
And I'm so excited. I've been trying to do Drew
338
00:17:15.740 --> 00:17:18.799
Barrymore's show forever. You guys both know her. I've never
339
00:17:18.859 --> 00:17:19.200
met her.
340
00:17:19.220 --> 00:17:23.319
I'm hoping that- I am going to be in love.
341
00:17:23.420 --> 00:17:27.309
I know it. I'm going to be eye contact, holding hands.
342
00:17:27.329 --> 00:17:29.410
Please hold hands. Oh, my Lord.
343
00:17:29.589 --> 00:17:32.809
She would snuggle with you on the couch. Anything goes
344
00:17:32.869 --> 00:17:33.410
with Drew.
345
00:17:33.430 --> 00:17:35.789
I'm just so scared that I'm going to be the
346
00:17:35.950 --> 00:17:38.509
one person who she's like six feet away from me.
347
00:17:38.529 --> 00:17:39.269
No, no, no.
348
00:17:39.289 --> 00:17:40.230
There's no world.
349
00:17:40.250 --> 00:17:42.880
I should have motorboated Drew when I did her show.
350
00:17:42.890 --> 00:17:45.000
I have regrets. Fortune.
351
00:17:46.339 --> 00:17:55.880
Marie out here in the open motorboat oh my god
352
00:17:55.960 --> 00:17:58.359
you say it like it was your choice and you
353
00:17:58.380 --> 00:18:00.000
just decided not.
354
00:17:59.880 --> 00:18:03.440
To I think Drew would have been totally fine with it.
355
00:18:03.799 --> 00:18:08.319
Yeah I guess you're right but do you guys have
356
00:18:08.400 --> 00:18:11.880
any tips for doing shows like that or Kelly Clarkson
357
00:18:11.900 --> 00:18:14.410
like outfit picked.
358
00:18:14.950 --> 00:18:15.970
Girl, you know I do.
359
00:18:16.410 --> 00:18:16.970
No, I don't.
360
00:18:17.099 --> 00:18:18.170
Is it sleeveless?
361
00:18:18.630 --> 00:18:19.799
Come on.
362
00:18:19.819 --> 00:18:23.400
No, I've lost my definition on the old triceps.
363
00:18:23.619 --> 00:18:25.720
I would say that of all the people that you
364
00:18:25.740 --> 00:18:29.039
could be doing interviews with, these are two of the friendliest.
365
00:18:29.299 --> 00:18:32.059
There's truly nothing to be nervous about with either of
366
00:18:32.099 --> 00:18:36.440
them because they're both chatters and they're both very warm people.
367
00:18:36.460 --> 00:18:39.640
Yeah, like it'll be a legit conversation.
368
00:18:39.660 --> 00:18:43.329
Oh, yeah, for sure. And Kelly's just like... I don't
369
00:18:43.349 --> 00:18:43.930
want to brag.
370
00:18:43.970 --> 00:18:46.769
I've done Kelly's show 10 times, the most of anyone
371
00:18:46.829 --> 00:18:50.410
on the Kelly Clarkson show. I've gotten a jacket. I've
372
00:18:50.430 --> 00:18:53.390
gotten a year's free Jenny's ice cream.
373
00:18:53.910 --> 00:18:54.569
Oh, my Lord.
374
00:18:54.670 --> 00:18:56.769
A year's free Jenny's ice cream?
375
00:18:56.970 --> 00:19:01.309
Yeah, when I did 10 episodes, they gave me a.
376
00:19:00.349 --> 00:19:03.779
Year of Jenny's, which I shared with my manager.
377
00:19:03.799 --> 00:19:07.640
Okay, that was my next question. Did you share?
378
00:19:07.660 --> 00:19:09.599
I shared, girl.
379
00:19:10.359 --> 00:19:14.140
So I'm going to be asking about that. I mean,
380
00:19:14.720 --> 00:19:16.769
should I pass on a message to either of them?
381
00:19:16.849 --> 00:19:17.450
To Kelly?
382
00:19:17.470 --> 00:19:20.390
Well, Kelly knows that I am obsessed with her voice.
383
00:19:20.410 --> 00:19:24.430
I have been talking about Kelly and her singing since
384
00:19:24.549 --> 00:19:25.609
Chelsea Lately Days.
385
00:19:26.069 --> 00:19:27.170
Yeah.
386
00:19:27.210 --> 00:19:27.470
Yeah.
387
00:19:27.710 --> 00:19:28.690
She's incredible.
388
00:19:29.079 --> 00:19:32.039
You know, you do your pre-interview with the producer to
389
00:19:32.599 --> 00:19:34.500
go over what you're going to talk about. So for
390
00:19:34.700 --> 00:19:37.690
the Drew show, they were like, Oh, we heard that
391
00:19:37.839 --> 00:19:40.079
you guys talk about Drew quite a bit on the pod.
392
00:19:40.160 --> 00:19:42.119
And I was like, yeah, I guess she does come
393
00:19:42.200 --> 00:19:44.019
up quite a bit. But they're like, what do you
394
00:19:44.059 --> 00:19:44.529
say about her?
395
00:19:44.539 --> 00:19:45.869
I was like, I don't know. What am I going
396
00:19:45.880 --> 00:19:48.259
to say? A fortune? side she didn't motorboat?
397
00:19:48.619 --> 00:19:52.660
I think we just have always commented on that she's
398
00:19:52.740 --> 00:19:55.940
so fun and friendly. And we like that she doesn't
399
00:19:56.000 --> 00:19:59.960
have any personal space boundaries. Yeah.
400
00:20:00.819 --> 00:20:03.059
I mean, we're projecting that she has no personal.
401
00:20:03.099 --> 00:20:07.319
She does not. You can look at every interview and
402
00:20:07.359 --> 00:20:08.880
see that she does not.
403
00:20:08.900 --> 00:20:10.660
And be thankful.
404
00:20:11.039 --> 00:20:11.200
Yeah.
405
00:20:11.299 --> 00:20:15.259
But we celebrate this. We're not. That's what I'm looking for.
406
00:20:15.339 --> 00:20:15.740
Yeah.
407
00:20:15.940 --> 00:20:16.490
Me too.
408
00:20:17.119 --> 00:20:21.349
I mean, it's just really like prepare yourself.
409
00:20:21.980 --> 00:20:24.089
I want that. I mean, I want to kiss all
410
00:20:24.119 --> 00:20:25.710
my friends anyway and spoon them.
411
00:20:25.990 --> 00:20:28.450
Well, cause you know, Ross Matthews is her cohost and
412
00:20:28.490 --> 00:20:29.549
he's amazing too.
413
00:20:29.569 --> 00:20:31.109
You'll love him.
414
00:20:31.230 --> 00:20:31.869
Okay, great.
415
00:20:32.069 --> 00:20:32.250
Okay.
416
00:20:32.269 --> 00:20:34.609
We should get him to ask a handsome pod question
417
00:20:34.650 --> 00:20:35.069
as well.
418
00:20:35.089 --> 00:20:36.970
Yes, we should. That's a good idea.
419
00:20:37.210 --> 00:20:40.369
But he's the nicest guy ever. She's lovely.
420
00:20:40.549 --> 00:20:43.109
It really, both shows you'll be like, Oh, I can't
421
00:20:43.130 --> 00:20:44.190
believe this is already over.
422
00:20:44.430 --> 00:20:45.670
It'll go by quickly.
423
00:20:45.690 --> 00:20:47.039
Okay, great.
424
00:20:47.359 --> 00:20:47.640
Great.
425
00:20:47.660 --> 00:20:47.839
Yeah.
426
00:20:48.279 --> 00:20:50.599
And you'll want to keep in touch, but you just
427
00:20:50.640 --> 00:20:54.559
have to pull it together and move it along.
428
00:20:54.960 --> 00:20:59.500
I did tell... I don't want to bring up old wounds, but... Alanis?
429
00:21:00.079 --> 00:21:00.400
Yeah.
430
00:21:00.740 --> 00:21:03.740
I did talk to Kelly about how I sang with Alanis.
431
00:21:04.640 --> 00:21:07.740
And Kelly was so jealous. And then Kelly recently also
432
00:21:07.759 --> 00:21:08.380
sang with Alanis.
433
00:21:08.420 --> 00:21:09.319
Oh, for God's sake.
434
00:21:09.339 --> 00:21:10.660
So she really one-upped me.
435
00:21:11.319 --> 00:21:11.900
Oh, God.
436
00:21:11.960 --> 00:21:12.220
Okay.
437
00:21:12.240 --> 00:21:13.289
Where does this leave me?
438
00:21:13.309 --> 00:21:13.380
Yeah.
439
00:21:15.329 --> 00:21:19.650
Tig, you're not... You're not even in this fight. You
440
00:21:19.690 --> 00:21:21.069
don't want it.
441
00:21:21.109 --> 00:21:24.029
Doesn't that seem like a lifetime ago? It was just
442
00:21:24.069 --> 00:21:24.789
last summer.
443
00:21:24.809 --> 00:21:27.019
Wait, was it?
444
00:21:27.700 --> 00:21:29.059
Oh my God, yeah.
445
00:21:29.099 --> 00:21:29.980
Not this summer.
446
00:21:30.000 --> 00:21:31.119
No, you're right.
447
00:21:31.160 --> 00:21:32.519
It was like a year ago.
448
00:21:32.839 --> 00:21:34.440
It was just two summers ago.
449
00:21:34.460 --> 00:21:39.940
It almost brought the whole podcast down.
450
00:21:40.720 --> 00:21:43.130
So should I, maybe I'll bring that up with Kelly.
451
00:21:43.430 --> 00:21:45.750
You could be, but like, I'm so glad you got
452
00:21:45.789 --> 00:21:46.950
a chance to sing with the Lance.
453
00:21:46.990 --> 00:21:48.680
I guess I'll think of my own anecdotes.
454
00:21:48.779 --> 00:21:50.759
Yeah, you've got some anecdotes.
455
00:21:51.289 --> 00:21:52.950
I can't just go on and be like, I heard
456
00:21:53.029 --> 00:21:55.869
Fortune got ice cream. I heard Fortune.
457
00:21:55.920 --> 00:21:59.420
Said she got this in her goodie bag.
458
00:21:59.980 --> 00:22:04.440
Fortune said, what do I share with my manager? When
459
00:22:04.480 --> 00:22:05.910
do I get my moment?
460
00:22:06.390 --> 00:22:08.230
You're the number one star in the world.
461
00:22:08.269 --> 00:22:09.490
That's right. Talk about that.
462
00:22:09.569 --> 00:22:12.369
Talk about being the number one IMDB star reader that
463
00:22:12.430 --> 00:22:14.619
Tig's currently tracking still.
464
00:22:15.390 --> 00:22:16.880
What do you mean currently?
465
00:22:16.920 --> 00:22:21.200
I've always tracked everyone's star meter on IMDb.
466
00:22:22.299 --> 00:22:26.279
Tingle just sent text to her actor friends that says
467
00:22:26.339 --> 00:22:26.720
number 780.
468
00:22:26.700 --> 00:22:37.970
Down from last week, but there's always next week.
469
00:22:38.130 --> 00:22:39.930
Fortune bad news, you've gone down 100 points.
470
00:22:42.029 --> 00:22:43.710
No one's googling you this week.
471
00:22:45.549 --> 00:22:47.410
That's funny you'll come.
472
00:22:47.319 --> 00:22:50.180
Up with some fun stuff they like you know antidotes
473
00:22:50.259 --> 00:22:54.500
about your show and then or antidotes they with tony
474
00:22:54.579 --> 00:22:58.839
that was like like little other like celebrity antidotes are.
475
00:22:58.700 --> 00:23:02.740
We gonna comment on that you're saying and antidotes can
476
00:23:02.759 --> 00:23:05.519
we can or should we let it slide.
477
00:23:05.559 --> 00:23:07.619
No you should get me i get you what did
478
00:23:07.680 --> 00:23:16.269
i say how do you say it for real Anecdotes. Anecdotes. Anecdotes.
479
00:23:17.309 --> 00:23:17.910
Anecdotes.
480
00:23:18.130 --> 00:23:18.809
Anecdotes.
481
00:23:19.049 --> 00:23:20.450
An anecdote is like a cure.
482
00:23:20.470 --> 00:23:23.619
You guys, I'm not just here to dish it. I
483
00:23:23.660 --> 00:23:24.799
can also take it.
484
00:23:26.980 --> 00:23:29.299
I don't do any I don't dish it and I
485
00:23:29.380 --> 00:23:30.079
don't take it.
486
00:23:30.059 --> 00:23:34.869
I feel like I mainly take it.
487
00:23:35.369 --> 00:23:38.849
I would love to be annihilated by both of you
488
00:23:39.130 --> 00:23:43.430
maybe we should do like one of those like When
489
00:23:43.569 --> 00:23:44.779
people roast each other.
490
00:23:44.799 --> 00:23:45.839
A roast battle?
491
00:23:45.859 --> 00:23:46.420
A roast.
492
00:23:46.960 --> 00:23:48.539
We should just roast each other.
493
00:23:48.559 --> 00:23:49.089
Oh, my God.
494
00:23:49.119 --> 00:23:49.279
Oh, no.
495
00:23:49.500 --> 00:23:52.119
I don't like that. I don't like roasts.
496
00:23:52.440 --> 00:23:54.829
Yeah, I'm not really a roast person.
497
00:23:54.869 --> 00:23:55.569
Me neither.
498
00:23:56.170 --> 00:23:57.950
I can watch it and enjoy it, but I don't
499
00:23:57.970 --> 00:23:58.769
want to be a part of it.
500
00:23:59.569 --> 00:24:00.740
I can't even really watch it.
501
00:24:01.210 --> 00:24:04.470
Well, sometimes you'll see a clip online of someone who's
502
00:24:04.490 --> 00:24:07.319
just written such clever, great jokes.
503
00:24:08.220 --> 00:24:13.279
Well, I mean, the roast battles can change someone's trajectory.
504
00:24:13.500 --> 00:24:16.619
Our pal Nikki Glaser, who's so funny, she's about to
505
00:24:16.839 --> 00:24:18.119
host Saturday Night Live.
506
00:24:18.240 --> 00:24:21.660
Oh, she is? It may be this week. Oh, my God.
507
00:24:21.680 --> 00:24:23.420
They announced it in October.
508
00:24:23.440 --> 00:24:23.509
Wow.
509
00:24:23.859 --> 00:24:24.099
Wow.
510
00:24:24.650 --> 00:24:25.569
That's amazing.
511
00:24:25.609 --> 00:24:27.950
That in November, she's going to host SNL.
512
00:24:28.000 --> 00:24:29.259
Isn't that wild? That's awesome.
513
00:24:29.279 --> 00:24:29.960
Yeah, that's amazing.
514
00:24:30.019 --> 00:24:30.759
It's really cool.
515
00:24:31.299 --> 00:24:32.759
Wait, fortunately. Oh, sorry.
516
00:24:33.039 --> 00:24:34.339
I was just going to say, I love that when
517
00:24:34.359 --> 00:24:37.880
we brought up roasting, we all went, no, I don't
518
00:24:37.940 --> 00:24:38.880
like roasting.
519
00:24:39.259 --> 00:24:42.880
I know this is why this podcast works.
520
00:24:43.400 --> 00:24:46.519
We have certain things in common.
521
00:24:46.559 --> 00:24:47.839
That's a little mean for me.
522
00:24:48.200 --> 00:24:50.829
Yeah, I don't know about that. No, thank you.
523
00:24:52.440 --> 00:24:54.740
Fortune, did you end up going to Cheesecake Factory yesterday?
524
00:24:54.759 --> 00:24:54.869
I did.
525
00:24:54.880 --> 00:24:55.819
Good question.
526
00:24:55.940 --> 00:24:56.900
Good question.
527
00:24:57.019 --> 00:24:59.500
How was it? Tell us everything.
528
00:24:59.539 --> 00:25:00.980
It was amazing.
529
00:25:01.019 --> 00:25:03.859
I went to the Grove. I haven't been there in
530
00:25:04.380 --> 00:25:08.859
like two years. And it was, I think the last
531
00:25:08.880 --> 00:25:11.380
time I was there was for Taylor Swift's premiere of
532
00:25:11.460 --> 00:25:13.339
her film.
533
00:25:13.480 --> 00:25:14.180
Oh, yeah, yeah.
534
00:25:14.220 --> 00:25:18.039
Not this latest one. Tay-Tay. Tay-Tay, as we call her.
535
00:25:19.000 --> 00:25:20.140
And it was fantastic.
536
00:25:20.200 --> 00:25:24.619
I went with Zach Neutowers and Taylor Tomlinson. And I
537
00:25:24.680 --> 00:25:30.549
was going to pay because Zach's birthday is in two days.
538
00:25:31.730 --> 00:25:36.630
And he got up to use the bathroom and gave.
539
00:25:36.390 --> 00:25:41.869
His card to the waiter. I love that. For those
540
00:25:41.890 --> 00:25:45.960
that don't know Zach, he's very gay. um and it
541
00:25:45.980 --> 00:25:46.940
was just funny that.
542
00:25:46.839 --> 00:25:49.900
He was gayer than you like way gayer than me
543
00:25:50.519 --> 00:25:52.599
and it's just funny he was taking care of his.
544
00:25:52.579 --> 00:26:00.519
Women i love when a secret a secret pain because
545
00:26:00.539 --> 00:26:02.900
i hate the awkwardness of dividing a bill and i
546
00:26:02.940 --> 00:26:05.400
hate this i hate the awkwardness of debating like no
547
00:26:05.420 --> 00:26:06.180
no i got.
548
00:26:06.079 --> 00:26:08.220
This guy so i think going to the bathroom and
549
00:26:08.240 --> 00:26:10.339
just smoothly doing i like i do that sometimes i
550
00:26:10.380 --> 00:26:11.140
like it a lot.
551
00:26:11.140 --> 00:26:12.180
It was very sweet.
552
00:26:12.240 --> 00:26:16.720
He opens a lot for me and opens for Taylor
553
00:26:16.829 --> 00:26:19.230
quite a bit, too. And he just was like, you
554
00:26:19.250 --> 00:26:21.150
guys have done so much for me in my career,
555
00:26:21.210 --> 00:26:22.829
and I just really appreciate both of you. And I
556
00:26:22.869 --> 00:26:26.470
wanted to treat you to some Cheesecake Factory.
557
00:26:26.490 --> 00:26:27.970
So it was very sweet of him.
558
00:26:28.569 --> 00:26:29.470
That's very nice.
559
00:26:29.490 --> 00:26:31.910
Well, I know your story about when you. When you
560
00:26:31.930 --> 00:26:32.950
tried to use a gift card.
561
00:26:33.430 --> 00:26:35.569
So I wonder if he secretly was using a gift
562
00:26:35.609 --> 00:26:37.049
card when he went to pay.
563
00:26:37.069 --> 00:26:40.670
He might have. Cheesecake factory points. I did get a
564
00:26:40.950 --> 00:26:43.549
piece of cheesecake to go because I ain't a fool.
565
00:26:43.569 --> 00:26:44.710
Yeah, you got to.
566
00:26:44.750 --> 00:26:46.569
But I didn't know he was paying. I didn't mean
567
00:26:46.589 --> 00:26:47.130
to be like.
568
00:26:47.730 --> 00:26:48.549
Oh, and now.
569
00:26:48.410 --> 00:26:50.750
That you're paying, I would also like a piece of
570
00:26:50.769 --> 00:26:51.650
cheesecake to go.
571
00:26:52.009 --> 00:26:55.309
Did you make the classic joke of, had I known
572
00:26:55.349 --> 00:26:57.869
you were paying, I would have gotten a whole cheesecake.
573
00:26:59.170 --> 00:27:02.619
No, but I should have. However, listen, I don't shy
574
00:27:02.640 --> 00:27:03.460
away from a deal.
575
00:27:03.480 --> 00:27:07.660
I got to the Cheesecake Factory before them, and they
576
00:27:07.700 --> 00:27:09.920
were like, if you sign up for the rewards program,
577
00:27:10.019 --> 00:27:11.619
you get half off your cheesecake.
578
00:27:11.680 --> 00:27:12.900
So I was like, well, I'm sitting here.
579
00:27:13.460 --> 00:27:16.650
Oh my God. So he only had to pay half.
580
00:27:21.650 --> 00:27:22.549
For the cheesecake.
581
00:27:22.710 --> 00:27:22.849
Okay.
582
00:27:22.869 --> 00:27:23.609
You're welcome.
583
00:27:23.829 --> 00:27:26.420
But now I'm probably going to get five texts a
584
00:27:26.430 --> 00:27:28.059
day from Cheesecake Factory.
585
00:27:28.079 --> 00:27:28.779
Yeah.
586
00:27:28.819 --> 00:27:33.559
So you joined the Cheesecake Factory frequent flyer program?
587
00:27:33.599 --> 00:27:33.720
Yes.
588
00:27:33.759 --> 00:27:37.759
That's awesome. Oh, my God.
589
00:27:37.920 --> 00:27:39.819
And it's like, you can get a free piece of
590
00:27:39.859 --> 00:27:42.619
cheesecake on your birthday. I'm like, da-da-da-da-da-da-da.
591
00:27:42.680 --> 00:27:44.220
Yeah, I can, girl.
592
00:27:45.619 --> 00:27:47.059
So, yeah, I'm not above it.
593
00:27:47.920 --> 00:27:49.910
What kind of cheesecake you go with the peanut.
594
00:27:49.769 --> 00:27:57.150
Butter i'm always a peanut butter bitch yes i am
595
00:27:57.329 --> 00:28:00.329
a peanut butter do you like peanut butter in general
596
00:28:00.390 --> 00:28:02.289
like you like go from the jar.
597
00:28:02.069 --> 00:28:05.230
I don't i'm not an animal i don't put my
598
00:28:05.269 --> 00:28:07.549
finger in the jar okay.
599
00:28:07.190 --> 00:28:09.170
I'm using a spoon but i'm going yeah i didn't.
600
00:28:08.970 --> 00:28:09.890
Say finger.
601
00:28:12.079 --> 00:28:12.859
I'm not an animal.
602
00:28:12.900 --> 00:28:15.660
I don't just lick straight from the peanut butter jar.
603
00:28:15.680 --> 00:28:17.599
I don't go fingering my peanut butter.
604
00:28:17.799 --> 00:28:21.339
Oh, boy. Here we go. See, I like peanut butter
605
00:28:21.359 --> 00:28:23.619
on an apple, peanut butter on a banana.
606
00:28:23.640 --> 00:28:24.230
Love those.
607
00:28:24.549 --> 00:28:27.049
Those are my favorite snacks that I have near daily.
608
00:28:27.069 --> 00:28:29.109
You know what peanut butter I really love?
609
00:28:29.410 --> 00:28:31.930
What, dear? What's it called?
610
00:28:32.089 --> 00:28:32.769
Schneiders?
611
00:28:33.430 --> 00:28:35.089
Oh, the peanut butter and jelly swirl?
612
00:28:35.190 --> 00:28:35.809
Schmuckers?
613
00:28:36.470 --> 00:28:37.630
No, hold on.
614
00:28:37.859 --> 00:28:38.420
Schmuckers?
615
00:28:38.440 --> 00:28:39.420
Hold on.
616
00:28:40.619 --> 00:28:41.769
Talk amongst yourselves.
617
00:28:42.289 --> 00:28:42.630
Nope.
618
00:28:42.769 --> 00:28:44.170
We want our Schneider info.
619
00:28:44.190 --> 00:28:45.430
Schneiders of Hanover?
620
00:28:45.450 --> 00:28:46.769
Is that it?
621
00:28:47.089 --> 00:28:48.750
Schneiders of Hanover.
622
00:28:49.049 --> 00:28:50.470
Am I really going to have to go in my
623
00:28:50.509 --> 00:28:53.750
pantry and find this out?
624
00:28:53.789 --> 00:28:57.490
It's pretty important that we get the right information about
625
00:28:57.529 --> 00:28:58.329
this peanut butter.
626
00:28:58.349 --> 00:29:01.059
So you're Googling Schneiders peanut butter and nothing's coming up?
627
00:29:01.059 --> 00:29:01.599
It's not Schneiders.
628
00:29:01.660 --> 00:29:02.880
Hold on. God, y'all.
629
00:29:04.299 --> 00:29:07.259
Sorry to bother you listeners will never be able to
630
00:29:07.299 --> 00:29:08.880
sleep if i don't get to the bottom of this
631
00:29:09.170 --> 00:29:10.509
y'all keep talking.
632
00:29:10.809 --> 00:29:13.769
No we won't be talking let's just sit here silently
633
00:29:13.789 --> 00:29:17.630
we'll be waiting what if fortune doesn't come back what
634
00:29:17.690 --> 00:29:21.529
if that was fortune's exit from the podcast forever.
635
00:29:21.529 --> 00:29:24.920
Oh my god or from or if something.
636
00:29:24.559 --> 00:29:26.740
Yeah what actually i.
637
00:29:26.720 --> 00:29:30.759
Was gonna say like i didn't say if she'd just
638
00:29:31.660 --> 00:29:34.150
perished and that was her last words.
639
00:29:33.890 --> 00:29:37.299
Were may marie and that was her last words was
640
00:29:37.359 --> 00:29:38.420
like peanut butter.
641
00:29:38.220 --> 00:29:44.640
Bitch and she had to get on a little stepladder
642
00:29:44.680 --> 00:29:46.220
to reach her pantry.
643
00:29:45.720 --> 00:29:49.329
Oh so cute not not tall enough to get her
644
00:29:49.369 --> 00:29:53.250
peanut butter Here comes the peanut butter bitch.
645
00:29:53.670 --> 00:29:55.329
Here comes the peanut butter bitch.
646
00:29:55.690 --> 00:30:00.450
I will never, ever see Fortune the same now that
647
00:30:00.490 --> 00:30:02.500
I know she's the peanut butter bitch.
648
00:30:03.599 --> 00:30:07.000
Yo, if I'm fingering any peanut butter, it's this one.
649
00:30:07.420 --> 00:30:09.329
It is called Laura Shudders.
650
00:30:10.549 --> 00:30:12.180
I've never heard of it.
651
00:30:12.549 --> 00:30:15.950
I have, but this is very anticlimactic, I'll be honest.
652
00:30:16.009 --> 00:30:16.569
It is?
653
00:30:16.609 --> 00:30:19.410
What were you expecting? Yes, peanut butter bitch.
654
00:30:19.529 --> 00:30:20.390
How's this?
655
00:30:23.269 --> 00:30:24.109
Oh, much better.
656
00:30:24.890 --> 00:30:26.289
I like the nutty one.
657
00:30:26.309 --> 00:30:27.849
Okay, of course you do.
658
00:30:27.849 --> 00:30:29.430
What I like about it, it's all natural.
659
00:30:29.589 --> 00:30:31.569
I'm not getting sponsored by them.
660
00:30:31.650 --> 00:30:33.019
I just am into it.
661
00:30:33.769 --> 00:30:36.049
It's all natural. What's in the ingredients?
662
00:30:36.069 --> 00:30:37.630
Oh, shit.
663
00:30:38.099 --> 00:30:40.519
Well, that's how we find out if it's truly all natural.
664
00:30:40.579 --> 00:30:41.279
Uh-huh, it is.
665
00:30:41.720 --> 00:30:48.049
Peanuts contains 1% or less of salt. That's all it said.
666
00:30:48.069 --> 00:30:48.910
That's the ingredients.
667
00:30:49.049 --> 00:30:52.109
Peanuts and salt? So I like a bit of sugar
668
00:30:52.950 --> 00:30:53.390
in my.
669
00:30:53.430 --> 00:30:55.069
So you're a Jiffy kind of kid.
670
00:30:55.309 --> 00:30:57.589
No, I draw the line at Jiffy, but.
671
00:30:58.529 --> 00:31:00.519
Or Jiff or whatever it's called. Yeah.
672
00:31:01.059 --> 00:31:02.579
What's it called again? I'm going to order some.
673
00:31:03.150 --> 00:31:04.690
Laura shudders.
674
00:31:05.089 --> 00:31:06.480
But do you have to stir it? Is it one
675
00:31:06.500 --> 00:31:08.099
of the ones? Yeah, you do. Ah, see, I'm out.
676
00:31:08.259 --> 00:31:09.119
Come on.
677
00:31:09.259 --> 00:31:11.740
May doesn't have that kind of time now that there's
678
00:31:11.799 --> 00:31:13.099
a number one star.
679
00:31:13.359 --> 00:31:15.420
The oil goes up to the top. You got to
680
00:31:15.460 --> 00:31:16.970
stir it.
681
00:31:17.210 --> 00:31:19.490
But it sloshes around. It gets on your hand.
682
00:31:19.549 --> 00:31:22.309
You know another good one? Again, not sponsored.
683
00:31:24.480 --> 00:31:26.650
This is peanut butter bitch corner.
684
00:31:26.670 --> 00:31:29.789
This is my peanut butter bitch corner.
685
00:31:31.769 --> 00:31:33.509
Almond butter at Trader Joe's.
686
00:31:34.470 --> 00:31:34.630
Oh.
687
00:31:34.950 --> 00:31:36.410
I like almond butter. Do you have to stir that one?
688
00:31:36.430 --> 00:31:37.430
It's their own brand.
689
00:31:37.910 --> 00:31:39.150
You do have to stir that too.
690
00:31:39.170 --> 00:31:40.430
I don't know what to tell you.
691
00:31:40.450 --> 00:31:44.450
May, hire an assistant that's willing to not stir.
692
00:31:44.609 --> 00:31:45.490
What do you want from me?
693
00:31:46.380 --> 00:31:47.039
All right, I will.
694
00:31:47.059 --> 00:31:50.279
Don't eat that. No, eat the more natural stuff. Hey,
695
00:31:50.299 --> 00:31:52.440
peanut butter bitch. Peanut butter bitch.
696
00:31:52.990 --> 00:31:53.869
Calm down.
697
00:31:53.890 --> 00:31:55.509
You want me to finger my peanut butter?
698
00:31:56.369 --> 00:31:57.009
No, ma'am.
699
00:31:57.029 --> 00:31:57.089
No.
700
00:31:57.089 --> 00:31:57.890
Fortune Marie.
701
00:31:58.309 --> 00:32:03.190
No, put it down.
702
00:32:07.589 --> 00:32:08.740
I'm calling HR.
703
00:32:08.769 --> 00:32:13.450
I have never seen. I have.
704
00:32:15.089 --> 00:32:17.250
Never seen Fortune laugh this hard.
705
00:32:17.509 --> 00:32:20.670
I just imagined them talking about what we were talking
706
00:32:20.690 --> 00:32:21.210
about earlier.
707
00:32:21.349 --> 00:32:24.890
And then it cuts to me going. We just got
708
00:32:24.930 --> 00:32:25.529
an update.
709
00:32:25.609 --> 00:32:27.170
Fortune turned down a bit.
710
00:32:27.690 --> 00:32:30.569
Thomas just commented, Fortune, turn your volume down.
711
00:32:30.630 --> 00:32:32.190
That's straight from HR, by the way.
712
00:32:32.250 --> 00:32:32.450
Yeah.
713
00:32:34.049 --> 00:32:36.230
HR just reached out to turn it down.
714
00:32:36.490 --> 00:32:38.250
Is it because of the blah, blah, blah?
715
00:32:38.309 --> 00:32:40.109
Yeah, there's going to be a lawsuit.
716
00:32:40.690 --> 00:32:41.650
Oh, my God.
717
00:32:41.839 --> 00:32:44.599
Oh, my God.
718
00:32:44.680 --> 00:32:45.680
That was fun.
719
00:32:45.720 --> 00:32:46.680
That was fun.
720
00:32:51.700 --> 00:32:53.220
Should we go to our question?
721
00:32:53.519 --> 00:32:54.119
We should.
722
00:32:54.160 --> 00:32:57.099
By the way, I have half that cheesecake for today's lunch.
723
00:32:57.579 --> 00:32:58.339
Oh, lovely.
724
00:32:58.359 --> 00:33:01.759
I'm going to be another peanut butter bitch, y'all, for lunch.
725
00:33:03.500 --> 00:33:04.660
Okay, new merch.
726
00:33:04.819 --> 00:33:07.509
I'm about to be a peanut butter bitch for lunch, y'all.
727
00:33:09.069 --> 00:33:15.990
If we had shirts called peanut butter bitch. that would
728
00:33:16.299 --> 00:33:19.660
be so fun for people that had no idea what
729
00:33:19.700 --> 00:33:20.579
that shirt.
730
00:33:20.279 --> 00:33:26.400
Meant peanut butter bitch keep it handsome this peanut butter
731
00:33:26.440 --> 00:33:28.299
bitch keeps it handsome.
732
00:33:27.920 --> 00:33:33.779
There you go oh my god how did we find
733
00:33:33.900 --> 00:33:38.009
joy there but did we ever someone read this i
734
00:33:38.069 --> 00:33:39.529
can't with my droopy eyes.
735
00:33:39.470 --> 00:33:43.130
I will i'm thrilled and excited but once i get
736
00:33:43.250 --> 00:33:47.670
my plastic surgery i'm gonna be reading everything you're like
737
00:33:47.690 --> 00:33:48.789
this keep.
738
00:33:48.539 --> 00:33:57.309
It how dare you hey everybody keep it handsome my
739
00:33:57.910 --> 00:34:01.930
eyes already look my eyes are so squinty.
740
00:34:01.650 --> 00:34:05.740
This is what i'm gonna look like after my plastic surgery.
741
00:34:05.220 --> 00:34:08.119
Look how squinty my eyes are always so i'm.
742
00:34:08.019 --> 00:34:10.880
Not you know what maybe i shouldn't get surgery and
743
00:34:10.900 --> 00:34:13.579
i should just hold my eyes up like this and
744
00:34:13.599 --> 00:34:16.809
then i wouldn't even have any recovery time yeah do.
745
00:34:16.730 --> 00:34:22.510
That toothache i still can't say it a better bitch.
746
00:34:24.639 --> 00:34:25.659
To Marie!
747
00:34:26.320 --> 00:34:30.320
God, what's Peanut Butter Bitch's sidekick? Can I be like
748
00:34:30.400 --> 00:34:31.619
Jam Jerk or something?
749
00:34:31.780 --> 00:34:32.699
Yeah, Jam Jerk.
750
00:34:35.289 --> 00:34:35.889
What am I?
751
00:34:35.909 --> 00:34:38.260
Who am I?
752
00:34:38.429 --> 00:34:38.929
Toast.
753
00:34:39.849 --> 00:34:44.820
No, I'm so excited to introduce... Our question asker today, Tig,
754
00:34:44.840 --> 00:34:47.940
this is too much. Go to YouTube and see what
755
00:34:48.219 --> 00:34:49.320
is happening here.
756
00:34:49.340 --> 00:34:50.760
Yeah, come on over to YouTube.
757
00:34:50.889 --> 00:34:51.449
Come on over.
758
00:34:51.550 --> 00:34:53.090
You've been handsome!
759
00:34:53.230 --> 00:34:54.349
Fortune Marie!
760
00:34:54.409 --> 00:34:55.269
I'm struggling.
761
00:34:55.329 --> 00:34:56.750
It's a medical condition.
762
00:35:01.889 --> 00:35:05.230
You look like when martin short plays a character who's had.
763
00:35:05.110 --> 00:35:09.789
Plastic surgery i love marty oh yeah marty why don't
764
00:35:09.809 --> 00:35:11.489
you ask us a question.
765
00:35:11.010 --> 00:35:16.900
Yeah marty marty marty and maybe meryl meryl and marty meryl.
766
00:35:16.539 --> 00:35:19.320
And marty ask a duo question that would be a
767
00:35:19.340 --> 00:35:22.659
big get okay sorry may i apologize for tig do
768
00:35:23.500 --> 00:35:24.019
i really.
769
00:35:23.960 --> 00:35:26.900
I okay we're not i'm not gonna wait this out
770
00:35:27.559 --> 00:35:31.210
okay this is happening right okay um And now your
771
00:35:31.250 --> 00:35:32.289
eyes can't open.
772
00:35:32.309 --> 00:35:33.170
They just stay closed.
773
00:35:33.909 --> 00:35:37.130
I'm so excited about today's question asker. This is someone
774
00:35:37.170 --> 00:35:40.469
who I wanted to be when I was a kid
775
00:35:40.719 --> 00:35:45.039
and a teen. Effortlessly cool. I'm going to say today's
776
00:35:45.059 --> 00:35:47.940
question asker is an actor, a writer, a musician who
777
00:35:47.980 --> 00:35:50.739
was Emmy nominated for his work on Robot Chicken. He's
778
00:35:50.780 --> 00:35:52.760
also starred in movies like Clueless.
779
00:35:53.199 --> 00:35:57.099
Road Trip, and Garfield. Breckenmeyer is asking today's question.
780
00:35:57.960 --> 00:36:00.360
Hey, handsome friends, it's Breckenmire with a question, and.
781
00:36:02.440 --> 00:36:02.900
An idea.
782
00:36:02.920 --> 00:36:07.119
Sorry, here's my question. When you go through a breakup,
783
00:36:07.199 --> 00:36:10.550
do you delete all photos and texts of the person,
784
00:36:10.570 --> 00:36:13.170
or do you hang on to them because they're your memories,
785
00:36:13.230 --> 00:36:15.670
and even though they're tough, you want to remember them
786
00:36:15.690 --> 00:36:16.250
at some point?
787
00:36:17.030 --> 00:36:17.469
Discuss.
788
00:36:18.710 --> 00:36:19.750
I like this question.
789
00:36:20.050 --> 00:36:20.610
So do I.
790
00:36:21.050 --> 00:36:23.710
And you might remember, I've talked about Brecken on the
791
00:36:23.750 --> 00:36:26.550
pod before, because I went to the, god, this was
792
00:36:26.590 --> 00:36:28.429
a lifetime ago as well, the WGA.
793
00:36:29.900 --> 00:36:32.139
Oh, the strike picket lines.
794
00:36:32.440 --> 00:36:34.960
Yeah, I like the act out with your hand there, mate.
795
00:36:35.900 --> 00:36:38.000
That's jam jerking action.
796
00:36:38.039 --> 00:36:40.639
Jam jerking and peanut butter fingering.
797
00:36:40.760 --> 00:36:46.010
Fortune, you need to take... Jam jerking, peanut butter fingering. Fortune,
798
00:36:46.030 --> 00:36:48.389
HR is shaking his head no.
799
00:36:48.409 --> 00:36:58.519
Jam jerking and peanut butter fingering. Oh, my God. Have
800
00:36:58.599 --> 00:37:02.840
I been called into HR? I'm so sorry. I didn't
801
00:37:02.880 --> 00:37:04.980
know I was talking about peanut butter.
802
00:37:05.019 --> 00:37:07.860
Thomas is writing you both up. No, I was.
803
00:37:07.360 --> 00:37:11.670
Talking about peanut butter. I wasn't talking about anything else.
804
00:37:12.190 --> 00:37:12.909
Go to YouTube.
805
00:37:12.929 --> 00:37:17.829
There was no, it was not just me talking about fingering.
806
00:37:17.849 --> 00:37:19.730
I was talking about peanut butter.
807
00:37:20.510 --> 00:37:21.610
May, what were you saying?
808
00:37:21.630 --> 00:37:26.460
I was saying during the writer's strikes, I was protesting
809
00:37:26.780 --> 00:37:28.940
and I saw Breckenmire and I was.
810
00:37:30.539 --> 00:37:32.260
What is wrong with us today?
811
00:37:32.320 --> 00:37:33.139
I don't know.
812
00:37:33.239 --> 00:37:35.679
I think we're still in love with seeing each other
813
00:37:35.719 --> 00:37:37.880
yesterday in person in the same room.
814
00:37:39.679 --> 00:37:42.219
Sorry, Mae. Sorry to take so rude.
815
00:37:44.760 --> 00:37:48.650
I was protesting and I saw Breckenmire and I did
816
00:37:48.690 --> 00:37:50.650
like an Instagram story where I was like, I saw
817
00:37:50.710 --> 00:37:54.530
my childhood crush Breckenmire and it didn't occur to me
818
00:37:54.590 --> 00:37:57.619
that he would see that. And then he, and then
819
00:37:57.639 --> 00:38:00.639
he DM me and was like, Hey, saw you too.
820
00:38:00.929 --> 00:38:02.489
Should have said hi or something. I was like, Oh
821
00:38:02.510 --> 00:38:02.869
my God.
822
00:38:03.789 --> 00:38:08.130
In Clueless, his character, Travis is like the sweet stoner,
823
00:38:08.469 --> 00:38:11.670
long hair skateboarder guy. And I was like, that character
824
00:38:11.710 --> 00:38:14.849
was so sweet and pure and non-threatening and funny. And
825
00:38:14.889 --> 00:38:16.730
I was like, that's who I want to be that guy.
826
00:38:16.929 --> 00:38:18.239
And that's who you've grown up to be.
827
00:38:18.260 --> 00:38:23.139
A sweet stoner. Hey, what's up girl?
828
00:38:24.690 --> 00:38:25.010
Wow.
829
00:38:25.030 --> 00:38:25.659
Breakups.
830
00:38:26.340 --> 00:38:27.019
Breakups.
831
00:38:27.219 --> 00:38:32.000
Do we know anything about this?
832
00:38:32.500 --> 00:38:34.900
None of us have been broken up with or broken
833
00:38:34.920 --> 00:38:35.440
up with anyone.
834
00:38:38.000 --> 00:38:41.869
I'm a keeper. I'm like a little magpie and I
835
00:38:42.130 --> 00:38:43.230
keep everything.
836
00:38:43.289 --> 00:38:43.630
I can't.
837
00:38:44.510 --> 00:38:46.900
Yeah, I keep things. Even if it was a bad breakup,
838
00:38:46.960 --> 00:38:51.239
I keep love letters or things that feel important. I
839
00:38:51.260 --> 00:38:54.780
don't keep them out on display framed. I'm putting them
840
00:38:54.840 --> 00:38:58.809
away in a box. And then if I'm feeling real
841
00:38:58.969 --> 00:39:02.829
emo or if I'm moving house, I might look through stuff.
842
00:39:03.230 --> 00:39:04.010
Moving house?
843
00:39:04.630 --> 00:39:06.190
Yeah, because when you're moving, you end up going through
844
00:39:06.210 --> 00:39:07.750
all your shit. And then I'm like, oh, there's this
845
00:39:07.809 --> 00:39:08.989
box of old memories.
846
00:39:09.269 --> 00:39:11.840
I've just never heard that saying, if you're moving house.
847
00:39:12.530 --> 00:39:15.550
Oh, maybe that's a British thing. If you're moving, I'm
848
00:39:15.590 --> 00:39:16.179
moving house.
849
00:39:16.360 --> 00:39:16.769
What would you say?
850
00:39:16.780 --> 00:39:18.460
Yeah, that might be a British thing. It's like when
851
00:39:19.059 --> 00:39:22.559
Australians say, I'm going to hospital.
852
00:39:23.480 --> 00:39:24.590
What would you say?
853
00:39:25.280 --> 00:39:27.550
I would say I'm going to the hospital.
854
00:39:27.570 --> 00:39:28.190
The hospital.
855
00:39:29.050 --> 00:39:29.969
They just say I'm going to hospital.
856
00:39:30.090 --> 00:39:30.699
Hospital.
857
00:39:30.719 --> 00:39:31.420
Oh, right.
858
00:39:31.500 --> 00:39:31.860
Okay.
859
00:39:31.880 --> 00:39:33.480
Yeah, yeah, yeah. But it would probably be like this.
860
00:39:33.800 --> 00:39:34.460
I'm going.
861
00:39:34.900 --> 00:39:35.199
Wait.
862
00:39:35.219 --> 00:39:35.719
Here we go.
863
00:39:35.820 --> 00:39:40.030
Oh, boy. Jennifer Lopez, razor blades. I'm going to the,
864
00:39:40.260 --> 00:39:41.800
I'm going hospitalled.
865
00:39:45.690 --> 00:39:47.070
Thank you, peanut butter bitch.
866
00:39:47.190 --> 00:39:51.389
Thank you for that. I'm going hospital.
867
00:39:51.849 --> 00:39:56.400
I think peanut butter bitch is going to stick. What
868
00:39:56.440 --> 00:39:57.260
were you saying, Mae?
869
00:39:57.880 --> 00:39:59.320
Oh, just that I keep stuff.
870
00:39:59.380 --> 00:40:02.460
I like to, you know, and I'm generally friends with
871
00:40:02.559 --> 00:40:06.340
most exes and I'm like, that was an you know
872
00:40:06.360 --> 00:40:10.650
a nice time yeah uh yeah not everyone i guess
873
00:40:10.690 --> 00:40:12.829
but i've never like burned stuff i mean i've never
874
00:40:12.869 --> 00:40:15.309
been like i want every trace of that person out
875
00:40:15.349 --> 00:40:17.159
of my life like i you know what i mean
876
00:40:17.820 --> 00:40:21.199
i might take down things that are immediately reminding me
877
00:40:21.219 --> 00:40:23.639
of the person yeah i.
878
00:40:23.619 --> 00:40:28.409
Haven't even thought about that stuff truth be told you
879
00:40:28.429 --> 00:40:32.110
haven't thought about what like erasing photos.
880
00:40:31.630 --> 00:40:36.210
Or Well, the thing with photos is annoying is your
881
00:40:36.289 --> 00:40:38.130
phone will randomly go, remember this?
882
00:40:38.530 --> 00:40:40.929
And it's like from three years ago and it's like.
883
00:40:41.090 --> 00:40:44.559
The most painful memory or it's like edited together a
884
00:40:44.619 --> 00:40:45.900
video with sad music.
885
00:40:46.139 --> 00:40:50.000
I hadn't thought about that phone, but thank you. Yeah, seriously.
886
00:40:51.300 --> 00:40:55.340
That's not something I don't really do that, like erase
887
00:40:55.639 --> 00:40:58.610
pictures and stuff. I mean, only if I look really
888
00:40:58.650 --> 00:41:04.690
bad in the picture or super chunky. Um, because yeah,
889
00:41:04.710 --> 00:41:07.489
like you said, there, there are memories. I was at
890
00:41:07.530 --> 00:41:10.710
least in my last situation was together 10 years.
891
00:41:10.750 --> 00:41:11.929
So that's a lot of memories.
892
00:41:12.429 --> 00:41:12.789
Yeah.
893
00:41:12.829 --> 00:41:13.769
Situation.
894
00:41:14.070 --> 00:41:14.349
Yeah.
895
00:41:14.389 --> 00:41:17.429
And I'm not just over here going F all that.
896
00:41:18.510 --> 00:41:20.500
Yeah. Um, I, you know, there was a lot of
897
00:41:20.539 --> 00:41:23.480
good times too. So I'm, I'm happy to remember the
898
00:41:23.519 --> 00:41:24.059
good times.
899
00:41:24.760 --> 00:41:27.829
Yeah. What about you, Tig? You keep, are you like a,
900
00:41:27.880 --> 00:41:29.460
a memory keeper?
901
00:41:29.480 --> 00:41:35.159
Yeah. Yeah, I don't go through and throw things out.
902
00:41:35.909 --> 00:41:36.150
Yeah.
903
00:41:36.389 --> 00:41:40.230
You know, or, I mean... same i don't like put
904
00:41:40.289 --> 00:41:45.360
our old photo albums out on my uh coffee table.
905
00:41:44.940 --> 00:41:49.219
Things are on display now yeah but it's like you
906
00:41:49.260 --> 00:41:50.280
know that'd.
907
00:41:49.900 --> 00:41:51.960
Be a good way to send a message to stephanie
908
00:41:52.019 --> 00:41:54.789
like you better raise your game you start putting.
909
00:41:55.329 --> 00:42:00.690
Look how happy i was with her yeah um One
910
00:42:00.730 --> 00:42:03.829
of the things that I really appreciated about Stephanie was
911
00:42:04.309 --> 00:42:08.380
this woman that I was involved with kind of overlapping
912
00:42:08.420 --> 00:42:13.679
with Stephanie. She made an appearance on One Mississippi and
913
00:42:13.739 --> 00:42:16.900
Stephanie actually suggested her for the role.
914
00:42:16.940 --> 00:42:17.659
That's fucking cool.
915
00:42:18.139 --> 00:42:20.199
And she and I was like, really? And it was
916
00:42:20.260 --> 00:42:24.340
kind of a romantic person on the show. And And
917
00:42:24.420 --> 00:42:28.460
I said, or I was just, I was surprised. And
918
00:42:28.519 --> 00:42:31.039
Stephanie said, I just feel like she's the right person
919
00:42:31.119 --> 00:42:34.460
for the role. And she said, and if you, she
920
00:42:34.500 --> 00:42:38.989
was like, and if you had a connection with her previously, why,
921
00:42:39.909 --> 00:42:43.110
like that, that's a real connection and it'll probably read on,
922
00:42:43.550 --> 00:42:48.070
on camera. And, and she, she just feels like if,
923
00:42:48.250 --> 00:42:51.949
if you had a connection with, why not continue that
924
00:42:52.239 --> 00:42:53.670
connection in a different way?
925
00:42:53.750 --> 00:42:53.969
And I.
926
00:42:55.449 --> 00:42:56.789
Just, I really appreciated it.
927
00:42:57.130 --> 00:42:57.289
Yeah.
928
00:42:57.309 --> 00:42:58.250
It's very cool.
929
00:42:58.610 --> 00:43:00.789
I have often been in love with people who are
930
00:43:00.829 --> 00:43:03.929
impossible to make jealous because it's such a cool quality.
931
00:43:04.070 --> 00:43:06.670
If you're like, well, I saw him bumped into my
932
00:43:06.730 --> 00:43:07.989
ex the other day and they're like, oh, great. How
933
00:43:08.030 --> 00:43:08.349
are they?
934
00:43:08.369 --> 00:43:11.030
And you're like, and yeah, I don't get, I don't
935
00:43:11.070 --> 00:43:12.530
get crazy about people's exes.
936
00:43:12.769 --> 00:43:13.409
I'm just like, okay.
937
00:43:13.449 --> 00:43:15.090
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
938
00:43:15.909 --> 00:43:22.030
Stephanie's tight with, um, when I say tight, like she
939
00:43:22.090 --> 00:43:27.519
and an ex of mine really, really like each other. And, uh,
940
00:43:27.659 --> 00:43:30.260
it brings me so much joy. Like our kid, our
941
00:43:30.480 --> 00:43:34.360
kids play together and, um, we hang out and our
942
00:43:34.409 --> 00:43:37.570
families and it's just so, and that was a tough one.
943
00:43:37.610 --> 00:43:40.610
That's my ex that like, I didn't know if we
944
00:43:40.630 --> 00:43:43.869
were going to come back from because it all kind
945
00:43:43.909 --> 00:43:47.099
of went down during when I was sick and my
946
00:43:47.139 --> 00:43:51.940
mother died and it just got so complicated because we
947
00:43:51.960 --> 00:43:56.039
went through a breakup and then my health issues exploded
948
00:43:56.119 --> 00:43:59.440
in the news and stuff and it just wasn't a
949
00:43:59.519 --> 00:44:03.349
fun thing I think for it just was a little
950
00:44:03.590 --> 00:44:05.469
tricky in weird ways.
951
00:44:06.769 --> 00:44:10.829
But there's like I mean there's kind of a maybe
952
00:44:10.869 --> 00:44:13.630
it's more common in the queer community that people sort
953
00:44:13.650 --> 00:44:16.610
of stay friends maybe because there's fewer of us like
954
00:44:16.630 --> 00:44:21.820
you stay like I remember going out to a party
955
00:44:21.860 --> 00:44:23.639
like a dance party or something with a bunch of
956
00:44:23.719 --> 00:44:26.820
friends and I was dating Parvati and Parvati came over
957
00:44:26.840 --> 00:44:28.360
and was meeting a bunch of my friends and then
958
00:44:28.519 --> 00:44:31.699
after like a couple of hours, she was like, have
959
00:44:31.719 --> 00:44:32.820
you slept with all.
960
00:44:32.719 --> 00:44:36.099
Of these people? I was like, yeah, I guess I have.
961
00:44:36.199 --> 00:44:40.900
But like, that's.
962
00:44:40.559 --> 00:44:41.760
Not my situation.
963
00:44:41.780 --> 00:44:45.960
But we've stayed really, stayed really close.
964
00:44:47.059 --> 00:44:49.000
But I don't think that happens as much in like
965
00:44:49.039 --> 00:44:50.619
the straight dating world, you know?
966
00:44:50.800 --> 00:44:51.760
Like, yeah.
967
00:44:52.139 --> 00:44:55.800
Or I have a t-shirt from an ex-boyfriend that is
968
00:44:56.000 --> 00:45:01.320
so comfy and And reassuring, because I love that guy,
969
00:45:01.340 --> 00:45:05.090
so it's nice to, you know, I'll wear the t-shirt frequently.
970
00:45:05.909 --> 00:45:08.690
Why do you think it is that it's more prevalent
971
00:45:08.710 --> 00:45:09.489
in our community?
972
00:45:09.510 --> 00:45:14.849
I think it's, like, the nature of, like, women.
973
00:45:14.869 --> 00:45:16.909
Do you think?
974
00:45:17.429 --> 00:45:18.230
I think, like.
975
00:45:18.269 --> 00:45:21.550
Well, I think maybe it happens with gay men, too,
976
00:45:21.739 --> 00:45:23.179
and non-binary people.
977
00:45:23.280 --> 00:45:23.880
I don't know.
978
00:45:23.920 --> 00:45:29.619
Just be, like, a non-traditional... Everything's already so non-traditional that
979
00:45:29.679 --> 00:45:33.050
it's like, why would, why would we follow any other
980
00:45:33.119 --> 00:45:34.369
rules right now?
981
00:45:34.809 --> 00:45:35.610
Yeah.
982
00:45:36.030 --> 00:45:40.670
And, and also I think community is important. And so, and,
983
00:45:40.789 --> 00:45:45.429
and communities are pretty small, like in, in, in different
984
00:45:45.469 --> 00:45:47.739
cities and in Toronto, especially it was like, you know,
985
00:45:47.760 --> 00:45:51.039
that L word thing of the, the Venn diagram or the,
986
00:45:51.599 --> 00:45:55.800
the chart, the chart that like connects everyone. It was like, Oh,
987
00:45:56.130 --> 00:45:58.210
been involved with each other it's just a smaller group
988
00:45:58.230 --> 00:46:01.010
so if you start cutting off everybody who's like dated
989
00:46:01.050 --> 00:46:03.590
your friend or anything then you end up yeah you
990
00:46:03.610 --> 00:46:04.440
kind of have to.
991
00:46:04.320 --> 00:46:06.699
Yeah we had a couple not of my exes but
992
00:46:06.840 --> 00:46:09.820
at the our wedding stuff and I don't even think
993
00:46:09.880 --> 00:46:13.670
twice about it yeah I didn't have like a ton
994
00:46:13.730 --> 00:46:19.579
of serious serious relationships prior yeah um so it was
995
00:46:19.699 --> 00:46:22.980
there was nothing too heavy that i was coming from
996
00:46:23.320 --> 00:46:25.920
yeah and some some i'd talk to and some we
997
00:46:25.940 --> 00:46:27.820
just have lost touch but.
998
00:46:28.059 --> 00:46:30.239
Yeah there are definitely exes of mine that i don't
999
00:46:30.280 --> 00:46:33.110
talk to as well like where it was just too
1000
00:46:33.150 --> 00:46:34.630
heavy or weird.
1001
00:46:34.809 --> 00:46:39.670
Or a couple that you're like no thanks yeah yeah
1002
00:46:39.690 --> 00:46:43.179
there's yeah i have a couple that i'm not in
1003
00:46:43.260 --> 00:46:49.099
contact with and it wasn't like a terribly fun departure.
1004
00:46:50.860 --> 00:46:57.929
But we're friendly and there's not anybody I wouldn't love
1005
00:46:58.010 --> 00:47:01.050
to hear was thriving in their life and happy and
1006
00:47:01.469 --> 00:47:05.329
like there is not a single, nobody, there's no one.
1007
00:47:05.730 --> 00:47:09.489
Even like going back to like Cheryl's not my ex
1008
00:47:09.550 --> 00:47:12.449
or anything, But it's a, it's a breakup of sorts.
1009
00:47:13.250 --> 00:47:13.530
It is.
1010
00:47:13.829 --> 00:47:17.969
And you know, I just, there's, there's no part of
1011
00:47:18.050 --> 00:47:22.849
me that is excited by somebody not being happy or
1012
00:47:22.909 --> 00:47:29.380
struggling or anything like that. There's really not. And especially exes. I, man,
1013
00:47:29.409 --> 00:47:33.219
would I be thrilled to hear that anyone I was
1014
00:47:33.280 --> 00:47:36.900
ever with was just happy, thriving, thriving, thriving.
1015
00:47:37.260 --> 00:47:39.960
I'm the same. I, I, life's, Too short.
1016
00:47:40.079 --> 00:47:43.619
I don't wish anyone ill will, even if it didn't
1017
00:47:43.639 --> 00:47:46.480
work out with us or even if it ended not great.
1018
00:47:46.900 --> 00:47:50.780
I am very much like, go live your best life.
1019
00:47:50.800 --> 00:47:51.960
Be happy.
1020
00:47:52.059 --> 00:47:54.579
Like if you weren't happy with me or we had whatever,
1021
00:47:55.519 --> 00:47:59.099
you know, we just couldn't get it together. Like that
1022
00:47:59.139 --> 00:48:01.800
doesn't mean you shouldn't have that happiness with somebody else.
1023
00:48:01.860 --> 00:48:05.610
Even in this most recent situation, I want her to
1024
00:48:06.300 --> 00:48:08.110
have the best everything.
1025
00:48:08.550 --> 00:48:09.500
Yeah.
1026
00:48:09.619 --> 00:48:11.960
And be genuinely happy and good.
1027
00:48:12.460 --> 00:48:13.500
Yeah. Yeah.
1028
00:48:13.860 --> 00:48:16.039
So, yeah, I don't look at I don't look at
1029
00:48:16.119 --> 00:48:21.150
memories or pictures or experiences with any sort of taint
1030
00:48:21.389 --> 00:48:28.489
on them from like what? Like that same whatever.
1031
00:48:28.110 --> 00:48:28.949
As a taint.
1032
00:48:29.880 --> 00:48:31.840
No, that's that's right. You used it right.
1033
00:48:32.059 --> 00:48:34.519
No, I know she did. You're just trying to make sure.
1034
00:48:34.599 --> 00:48:38.920
Fortune Marie me. But I don't have this like stink
1035
00:48:39.059 --> 00:48:39.639
on it now.
1036
00:48:40.219 --> 00:48:40.610
Yeah.
1037
00:48:41.050 --> 00:48:41.489
Yeah.
1038
00:48:41.550 --> 00:48:45.590
Where I look back on any of it like, ugh. Yeah.
1039
00:48:45.849 --> 00:48:48.730
I'm grateful for those memories and that there were so
1040
00:48:48.750 --> 00:48:49.829
many happy times.
1041
00:48:49.969 --> 00:48:53.230
And the growth that you get from all of these
1042
00:48:53.610 --> 00:48:56.809
things that were tremendous and terrible.
1043
00:48:56.829 --> 00:48:57.090
Yeah.
1044
00:48:58.170 --> 00:49:00.829
Man, it launches you to a new place.
1045
00:49:01.260 --> 00:49:04.539
We're all like, well, I mean, like the retreat I
1046
00:49:04.579 --> 00:49:06.980
just went to, like by the end of it, I
1047
00:49:07.019 --> 00:49:11.679
just felt so clearly like we're all just like muddling
1048
00:49:11.739 --> 00:49:12.710
through life.
1049
00:49:12.969 --> 00:49:14.710
Everyone's doing the best they can.
1050
00:49:14.730 --> 00:49:17.489
Everyone's doing their best. You meet people, you know, where
1051
00:49:17.510 --> 00:49:19.949
you're at and sort of travel with them.
1052
00:49:20.159 --> 00:49:22.579
For a bit. And then if you grow together, you do.
1053
00:49:22.619 --> 00:49:24.440
And if you don't, you don't. I mean, that's the
1054
00:49:24.460 --> 00:49:26.400
thing too. You can still have boundaries with people, I think.
1055
00:49:26.860 --> 00:49:30.119
I mean, especially in these longer term relationships. I feel
1056
00:49:30.139 --> 00:49:33.110
like I'm so different than I was 10 years ago.
1057
00:49:33.210 --> 00:49:36.269
She's so different than we were 10 years ago. And
1058
00:49:36.329 --> 00:49:41.760
sometimes you grow together. Sometimes you change and, that's a
1059
00:49:41.820 --> 00:49:42.980
part of the journey too.
1060
00:49:43.639 --> 00:49:47.360
When I split with this one, oh, actually the same
1061
00:49:47.639 --> 00:49:53.059
one that made an appearance on One Mississippi. When we
1062
00:49:53.099 --> 00:49:57.320
were like going our separate ways, it was, there was
1063
00:49:57.340 --> 00:50:00.679
a little, you know, not, I mean, it was, of course,
1064
00:50:00.739 --> 00:50:04.309
it was emotional. It was hard. But what I did
1065
00:50:04.449 --> 00:50:10.090
to move on quickly was I grabbed this really unattractive
1066
00:50:10.170 --> 00:50:13.789
picture that she jokingly sent me while we were.
1067
00:50:15.570 --> 00:50:16.329
Involved.
1068
00:50:16.769 --> 00:50:19.429
And I used it as my screensaver on everything. So
1069
00:50:19.630 --> 00:50:24.510
every time I opened my computer, turned my phone on,
1070
00:50:24.570 --> 00:50:30.030
I just saw her looking her absolute worst. And I'd
1071
00:50:30.050 --> 00:50:31.969
be like, yeah, I don't need that.
1072
00:50:34.309 --> 00:50:37.880
Can I tell you a funny way I got let down?
1073
00:50:38.489 --> 00:50:38.949
Easy.
1074
00:50:39.889 --> 00:50:45.449
Um, there was a, this was many, many years ago. Um, and, uh,
1075
00:50:45.829 --> 00:50:50.840
we never officially like we're dating. We liked each other and,
1076
00:50:51.400 --> 00:50:54.360
and it was kind of in the works to possibly date.
1077
00:50:55.119 --> 00:50:57.280
And she texted.
1078
00:50:57.199 --> 00:51:00.750
Me like, can I make you dinner and tomorrow night
1079
00:51:00.789 --> 00:51:02.530
or whatever? I was like, Oh, great. Like maybe we're
1080
00:51:02.550 --> 00:51:06.269
going to finally, you know, move into the, to the
1081
00:51:06.349 --> 00:51:09.769
dating phase. Um, and she came.
1082
00:51:09.650 --> 00:51:13.769
Over and informed me that, uh, she was in love
1083
00:51:13.829 --> 00:51:14.710
with her roommate.
1084
00:51:15.679 --> 00:51:17.820
Oh my God.
1085
00:51:18.000 --> 00:51:21.599
She was going to pursue that. So we wouldn't be
1086
00:51:21.639 --> 00:51:25.000
able to pursue anything here more than friends.
1087
00:51:25.559 --> 00:51:28.900
This is at the beginning of the beginning. Yes.
1088
00:51:29.019 --> 00:51:32.119
And, and I'm just like, Oh, okay.
1089
00:51:32.139 --> 00:51:36.280
Like, I'm like, again, not that emotionally invested that is devastating.
1090
00:51:36.829 --> 00:51:40.150
But I did really like her and wanted to see
1091
00:51:40.210 --> 00:51:44.019
if there was something there. And so I was bummed,
1092
00:51:44.099 --> 00:51:47.239
but you're like, okay. And then, and then, you know,
1093
00:51:47.260 --> 00:51:50.940
we have this awkward conversation and, uh, and then she's like.
1094
00:51:51.000 --> 00:51:58.429
Well, I can go or I can, I can actually
1095
00:51:58.510 --> 00:52:01.670
make you dinner. And I was like, you know, I
1096
00:52:01.670 --> 00:52:02.489
wanted to be like.
1097
00:52:02.789 --> 00:52:04.630
No, get out of here.
1098
00:52:06.340 --> 00:52:08.940
But I was like, well, what did you bring?
1099
00:52:08.960 --> 00:52:11.559
Peanut butter.
1100
00:52:11.719 --> 00:52:15.909
She was like, shrimp tacos. And I was like, ah,
1101
00:52:16.110 --> 00:52:17.150
I love shrimp tacos.
1102
00:52:18.929 --> 00:52:19.710
Now we're talking.
1103
00:52:19.989 --> 00:52:23.090
So she went in and made dinner.
1104
00:52:23.110 --> 00:52:26.199
And I had just gotten dumped.
1105
00:52:26.840 --> 00:52:28.780
And I was just like, I'm going to eat these
1106
00:52:28.840 --> 00:52:29.679
shrimp tacos.
1107
00:52:30.679 --> 00:52:31.940
Yeah, I would do the same thing.
1108
00:52:31.960 --> 00:52:34.320
Because those are the only tacos I'm eating tonight. Am
1109
00:52:34.360 --> 00:52:35.500
I right? Hey.
1110
00:52:37.429 --> 00:52:46.739
Girl Marie. Tig. Are you humming, Tig? Did you just
1111
00:52:46.760 --> 00:52:49.920
start humming a little song to soothe yourself?
1112
00:52:50.280 --> 00:52:57.570
I'm sorry. I had to. No, you didn't.
1113
00:52:58.570 --> 00:53:01.809
I'm obsessed with the response being to start humming a
1114
00:53:01.829 --> 00:53:04.909
little song. It's like Tig just had to dissociate.
1115
00:53:05.750 --> 00:53:08.929
Because that was... Those were the only tacos I was eating.
1116
00:53:09.070 --> 00:53:10.239
Heard you the first time.
1117
00:53:10.260 --> 00:53:12.050
That night.
1118
00:53:12.449 --> 00:53:13.730
Maybe it was my delivery.
1119
00:53:14.150 --> 00:53:19.829
Because those were the only tacos this lesbian was eating.
1120
00:53:19.849 --> 00:53:21.369
Peanut butter pitch.
1121
00:53:22.349 --> 00:53:25.250
Cork it.
1122
00:53:26.909 --> 00:53:29.690
But that's how much I love food. I'm just like, sure,
1123
00:53:29.730 --> 00:53:32.789
you can dump me. And yes, I will eat those tacos.
1124
00:53:32.829 --> 00:53:33.789
Yeah, totally.
1125
00:53:35.650 --> 00:53:37.550
It's funny anywho well i.
1126
00:53:38.130 --> 00:53:40.829
Have a my roommate was was broken up with uh
1127
00:53:41.230 --> 00:53:43.380
on the first day of a vacation to a romantic
1128
00:53:43.409 --> 00:53:44.639
vacation together like.
1129
00:53:44.530 --> 00:53:47.820
No and they had a still vacation why would you
1130
00:53:48.010 --> 00:53:51.019
do that why didn't we go that was his main
1131
00:53:51.300 --> 00:53:55.039
thing he was like okay but what the hell like yeah.
1132
00:53:54.719 --> 00:53:57.079
They'd saved up for this trip it's like just wait
1133
00:53:57.119 --> 00:53:59.239
till the end but yeah not go.
1134
00:53:58.940 --> 00:54:00.099
Yeah yeah.
1135
00:54:01.610 --> 00:54:01.869
Anyways.
1136
00:54:01.889 --> 00:54:03.050
Make shrimp tacos.
1137
00:54:03.389 --> 00:54:04.150
Yeah.
1138
00:54:04.170 --> 00:54:08.340
Because those are the only tacos you're eating that night.
1139
00:54:08.360 --> 00:54:16.380
I'm kidding. But hold on, wait.
1140
00:54:16.820 --> 00:54:22.739
The humming is so funny to me. Wait, fortune what?
1141
00:54:22.840 --> 00:54:28.130
Hold on. Hold on now. Because those are the only,
1142
00:54:28.170 --> 00:54:29.619
hold on. No, boy.
1143
00:54:29.639 --> 00:54:34.420
Because those are the only tacos I was eating that night.
1144
00:54:36.230 --> 00:54:38.889
Oh, God. Oh, my God.
1145
00:54:40.969 --> 00:54:43.730
Do you like that?
1146
00:54:43.750 --> 00:54:45.340
Yeah, I like that a lot.
1147
00:54:45.360 --> 00:54:48.699
Thank you. Should we hear Brecken's answer?
1148
00:54:48.719 --> 00:54:49.019
Oh, shit.
1149
00:54:49.059 --> 00:54:50.260
Yeah, let's hear Brecken's answer.
1150
00:54:51.789 --> 00:54:54.309
I forgot to answer my own question. So my answer
1151
00:54:54.469 --> 00:54:56.829
is I would just not look at them until I'm
1152
00:54:56.949 --> 00:54:59.630
okay looking at them, but I'd want to keep the memories.
1153
00:54:59.869 --> 00:55:01.670
I used to be the men in black guy who
1154
00:55:01.690 --> 00:55:03.610
wishes everyone I was ever with was on a deserted
1155
00:55:03.710 --> 00:55:05.730
island that was slowly sinking in the sea.
1156
00:55:05.769 --> 00:55:08.170
But now I'm mature.
1157
00:55:07.750 --> 00:55:13.710
And wear sweaters. Look at that. Mature and wearing sweaters.
1158
00:55:13.730 --> 00:55:17.239
Throw on a sweater and just... Move on.
1159
00:55:17.260 --> 00:55:17.969
That's right.
1160
00:55:18.010 --> 00:55:20.570
He was wearing a, yeah, a fetching kind of, similar
1161
00:55:20.590 --> 00:55:21.849
to your cardigan there, Tig.
1162
00:55:22.150 --> 00:55:22.550
I know.
1163
00:55:22.789 --> 00:55:23.030
Yeah.
1164
00:55:23.369 --> 00:55:23.530
Yeah.
1165
00:55:23.550 --> 00:55:26.119
Look at that. Old Cardi, Cardi B, Cardi.
1166
00:55:25.860 --> 00:55:26.639
T over there.
1167
00:55:26.719 --> 00:55:27.980
Old Cardi B, Tig.
1168
00:55:28.340 --> 00:55:30.320
Do I strike you as a snuggly person?
1169
00:55:31.000 --> 00:55:32.079
That's a great question.
1170
00:55:32.119 --> 00:55:32.530
Thank you.
1171
00:55:33.489 --> 00:55:38.880
I think... That with your immediate family, probably.
1172
00:55:38.900 --> 00:55:38.980
Yeah.
1173
00:55:39.760 --> 00:55:42.050
But I don't, I mean, definitely we know you don't
1174
00:55:42.090 --> 00:55:44.449
love a snuggle from a stranger.
1175
00:55:44.789 --> 00:55:47.110
I love, I love snuggles.
1176
00:55:47.630 --> 00:55:48.550
Oh, me too, man.
1177
00:55:49.030 --> 00:55:52.530
Maybe. Not only am I a peanut butter bitch, I'm
1178
00:55:52.590 --> 00:55:53.030
a snuggle bitch.
1179
00:55:53.050 --> 00:55:54.110
You're a snuggle bitch.
1180
00:55:54.570 --> 00:55:55.719
You're a little snuggle worm.
1181
00:55:55.800 --> 00:55:59.360
I'm a snuggle worm snuggle bitch. I love the cuddles.
1182
00:55:59.500 --> 00:56:01.070
I love the touch. I love the.
1183
00:56:02.369 --> 00:56:04.329
all that wait is this your dating yeah is this
1184
00:56:04.369 --> 00:56:06.670
your online dating profile.
1185
00:56:06.389 --> 00:56:08.880
I love i love a butt i love a butt
1186
00:56:09.039 --> 00:56:14.179
what grab and a snuggle and a cut rub how.
1187
00:56:14.079 --> 00:56:17.719
Do we get into butt grabs i do like a
1188
00:56:17.739 --> 00:56:18.590
butt grab.
1189
00:56:18.289 --> 00:56:21.989
Is that does that count as snuggling.
1190
00:56:22.329 --> 00:56:25.190
Not in my book my butt Snuggle my butt.
1191
00:56:25.329 --> 00:56:27.530
All right, let's wrap this up.
1192
00:56:27.610 --> 00:56:31.599
You're on fire today, Fortune. There's like 10 new catchphrases.
1193
00:56:34.260 --> 00:56:38.900
I love when you did the drum roll or whatever
1194
00:56:38.960 --> 00:56:41.340
it is before you did the joke.
1195
00:56:41.750 --> 00:56:42.610
Yeah. Wait.
1196
00:56:43.429 --> 00:56:43.809
Oh, boy.
1197
00:56:43.829 --> 00:56:45.630
I did it.
1198
00:56:46.170 --> 00:56:46.429
Yeah.
1199
00:56:46.929 --> 00:56:48.429
All right, let's wrap this up.
1200
00:56:48.449 --> 00:56:50.610
Let's get out of this episode, please.
1201
00:56:51.030 --> 00:56:53.630
I am going on tour at the end of February.
1202
00:56:53.730 --> 00:56:57.789
Please get some tickets and come see me. I'm doing
1203
00:56:57.789 --> 00:57:01.260
35 cities and I'm really excited and nervous.
1204
00:57:01.579 --> 00:57:02.780
And I'm going to.
1205
00:57:02.900 --> 00:57:06.420
Write that show real soon. And it's going to be
1206
00:57:06.500 --> 00:57:10.239
really fun to see everybody. And also check out Wayward
1207
00:57:10.409 --> 00:57:13.000
on Netflix, please. What are you guys up to?
1208
00:57:13.619 --> 00:57:17.280
On November 22nd, I'm in San Jose, California. And the
1209
00:57:17.360 --> 00:57:18.800
next night in Fresno.
1210
00:57:18.929 --> 00:57:21.469
Then Thanksgiving weekend, Charlotte, North Carolina.
1211
00:57:22.590 --> 00:57:22.809
St.
1212
00:57:22.909 --> 00:57:24.070
Petersburg, Florida.
1213
00:57:24.190 --> 00:57:29.010
And Orlando, Florida in December. Norfolk, Virginia, December 27th. Salt
1214
00:57:29.050 --> 00:57:30.570
Lake City, December 29th.
1215
00:57:31.329 --> 00:57:36.940
Vancouver, the 30th. And then New Year's Eve in Seattle, Washington, baby!
1216
00:57:38.989 --> 00:57:42.389
Oh, and I'm going to be at Dynasty Typewriter in
1217
00:57:42.429 --> 00:57:48.050
Los Angeles, November 19th, and Largo in Los Angeles, November 21st.
1218
00:57:48.639 --> 00:57:52.199
I think I'll be adding some Toronto club dates here
1219
00:57:52.219 --> 00:57:57.639
or there. Check out tignotaro.com. Also, make sure to watch
1220
00:57:57.780 --> 00:58:01.539
the Andrea Gibson documentary, Come See Me in the Good
1221
00:58:01.599 --> 00:58:06.980
Light on Apple TV. It's so beautiful. I produced that,
1222
00:58:07.360 --> 00:58:09.880
and it's one of the things I'm most proud of.
1223
00:58:10.320 --> 00:58:13.789
I'm absolutely most proud of in my career, as well
1224
00:58:13.829 --> 00:58:14.690
as this podcast.
1225
00:58:14.969 --> 00:58:18.110
Yeah, remember to subscribe to the pod, share it with
1226
00:58:18.150 --> 00:58:18.789
your pals.
1227
00:58:19.150 --> 00:58:20.090
Rate, review.
1228
00:58:20.550 --> 00:58:24.469
Also, subscribe to our YouTube channel. Share an episode with
1229
00:58:24.489 --> 00:58:25.159
your friends.
1230
00:58:25.780 --> 00:58:27.599
Today would be a good one to watch on YouTube,
1231
00:58:27.619 --> 00:58:27.820
I think.
1232
00:58:29.519 --> 00:58:29.719
Why?
1233
00:58:29.780 --> 00:58:31.960
Because of this?
1234
00:58:32.000 --> 00:58:34.630
Yeah, because of that. Because of Thomas writing you up
1235
00:58:34.710 --> 00:58:36.289
on a little post-it note.
1236
00:58:36.610 --> 00:58:41.469
You can also get our merch at handsomepod.com. And until
1237
00:58:41.550 --> 00:58:46.300
next time. Keep it handsome.
1238
00:58:46.900 --> 00:58:47.739
Peanut butter bitch.
1239
00:58:48.460 --> 00:58:51.360
Handsome is hosted by me, Mae Martin, Tig Notaro, and
1240
00:58:51.420 --> 00:58:54.380
Fortune Feimster. The show is produced, recorded, and edited by
1241
00:58:54.440 --> 00:58:58.960
Thomas Ouellette. Email us at handsomepod at gmail.com. And please
1242
00:58:59.079 --> 00:59:01.630
follow us on social media at handsomepod.
1243
00:59:03.309 --> 00:59:04.590
What a podcast!
1244
00:59:04.630 --> 00:59:05.170
What a podcast!
1245
00:59:05.230 --> 00:59:09.909
What a podcast! That was a hate gum.
1246
00:59:11.760 --> 00:59:15.340
Checking Allstate First could save you hundreds on car insurance.
1247
00:59:15.719 --> 00:59:19.940
Not checking whether it's called a wheelbarrow or a wheelbarrow.
1248
00:59:20.300 --> 00:59:23.260
We here at the Handsome Podcast need to do better.
1249
00:59:23.900 --> 00:59:26.400
We heard loud and clear from our listeners that it's
1250
00:59:26.480 --> 00:59:31.150
actually a wheelbarrow, and we're using this opportunity to apologize
1251
00:59:31.190 --> 00:59:33.889
to all of you for the embarrassing misunderstanding.
1252
00:59:34.289 --> 00:59:37.869
Yeah, check-in first is handsome, so check Allstate first for
1253
00:59:37.889 --> 00:59:39.989
an auto quote. It could save you hundreds. You're in
1254
00:59:40.030 --> 00:59:43.590
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00:59:43.639 --> 00:59:48.099
and availability. Allstate North American Insurance Company & Affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois.