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00:00:12
Hi, I'm Rita with Mirador eco retreat. We've chosen to go online only for the time being. So I'm offering these half hour monthly podcasts to share insights about how we really can suffer less with mindfulness. Please join me as I share a particular aspect of mindfulness in each episode, followed by a guided meditation. Everybody wants to talk about their Dingo. I met a woman in town and asked if her dog was an Australian cattle dog. Yes. She said, well crossed with Dingo. When I moved west and first met this breed, they call dingoes. I scoffed. Inwardly. I had a degree and I knew a lot about wild dogs. And these stocky speckled ranch dogs. Didn't remotely resemble the sleek native Dingo of Australia. I cringe now at how narrow minded I was. What if I had met the term Dingo back then with curiosity instead of judgment. I would have learned 30 years ago that the Australian cattle dog also called red or blue healer. Was selectively bred for herding cattle, long distances. By crossing, imported border collies with the native wild dingoes. Who's characteristics made them ideal for navigating the harsh terrain. As it happens. I only bothered to learn this fascinating history. Once I discovered that my little rescue dog had 20% red heeler DNA. So I researched that breed and now like everyone else, I want to talk about my Dingo. This illustrates for me how severely we can limit our lives with our judgments. When I was young and mindless. I decided I wasn't interested in a certain guy. Because he said rather, instead of rather. I thought he was being pretentious and it took me a long time to recognize that there's a part of the country where people say rather he wasn't putting on a fake British accent. It's just the way he was raised. I've judged people harshly all my life for the wrong words or poor grammar cause language comes easily to me. And maybe because I've been mocked and judged myself when I've used the wrong word. One time. I thought Intrepid was an insult because. I didn't know, it meant brave. And one time I said, Highness. Instead of heinous. About a crime. And I was mocked instead of. Met with compassion for having had to testify. So we can judge people harshly for things when they don't live up to our idea of what's right. But what an effort this is and how unpleasant that makes our experience of life. When instead we can just let it go. And chalk it up to how they were raised or their part of the country or the world, or a bad day or a slip of the tongue. And let it go. Just let it go. We're all making judgements every moment that we're alive. Some are necessary and important and make a positive difference in our lives and others are just a whole lot of mental gymnastics. The mind being busy, fortifying the ego. Or tearing it down, maybe the most damaging judgment habit we develop. Is judging ourselves harshly. Not pretty. Not smart enough. Stupid. Clumsy. Unlovable. We narrate a constant stream of snap judgments. About ourselves and other people. Sometimes positive, often negative. How they look what they're wearing, their weight, skin color, or apparent sexuality. She's rude. He's handsome. I'm not good enough. They're annoying. Whether we like something, they said, whether they said it right or wrong. Judging people for being different is a root source of bullying. Conflict and war. We also make helpful discerning judgments. To wear a coat when it's cold outside. Where a sensible shoes to go sightseeing. Call 9 1 1. If we witness a car wreck. Choose one food over another, according to our preference. Leash the dog wash the sheets, wear a mask, slow down the car. We're judging all the time. As I drove to town that day, I met the lady with the Dingo. I was observing my judgments along the way. The fields are greening up nicely. They should fix that fence. Hurry under the cliff. There's a fallen rock. Slow down here. There's always something crossing the road. Hey, slow down. You idiot. 10 seconds later and you'd have smashed that baby Marmot waddling across the road. I hope your hurry is worth taking a life. I carried that judgment a mile up the road, rehearsing. What I might've said to him. Until another judgment took its place. In town, it was use your turn signal, buddy. Ooh. I like the new color on that house. Revenge to her bumper sticker. Don't like those people. And in the store. she's Not wearing a mask, of course, but she's nice keeping her distance. Then salmon or Turkey for the cat. She's already getting enough fish. A mix of judging and discerning nonstop all the way to town and back again. Once home, it continued as it does. Gardner supply is so damn slow. Delivering orders. Sunshine. Yay. Sunshine, better. Go in and start laundry. Hm, last load was rugs. So do floormates now before close. But first mop the bathroom floor sink could use cleaning too. Oh, how happy to hear a Phoebe. Truck in the driveway, quick run inside. From inside. I see it's FedEx with the gardener supply order and laugh at myself. I'm learning to transform judgments. Once I had mentally yelled at the speeder. I practiced shifting my judgment to curiosity and compassion. I can't presume to know why he was driving so fast. Maybe he was speeding home because his kid fell off the barn loft. Instead of conversing with him in my head though. I could have just been grateful that he didn't hit the baby Marmot and let it go. Turning my attention to the beautiful day. The beautiful rocks and colors and trees. And the Creek running strong. Our minds put prodigious effort into judging everything all the time. These judgments are habitual. That's all they are. They keep the mental hamster wheel spinning. When we can let go of the mental habit of negative judgment. Especially, and starting with ourselves. We can replace it with habits that make life easier and happier. And help us get along with others. Our judgements often pounce like a predator on a prey animal latch on and worry it, tearing it apart. What if we don't waste all that effort in judging. But use it to ask. How can I shift this judgment into something that's healthier? More in alignment with my values of being kind. Compassionate. Tolerant. Generous. Whatever your values are. Practicing that shift, like all of these mindfulness skills is hard at first. That's why we call it practice. It takes a good deal of effort. In the beginning, it takes a thousand times a day saying, was that helpful or healthy? Or was that a deleterious or afflictive mental habit? Eventually over time, the shift becomes effortless. It's second nature to me now. Even though the judgment still arises, that that guy's speeding like a maniac and he's risking lives. My very next thought is how can I bring curiosity or compassion to that? First I learned to let go of afflictive stories or judgements. After holding on to them a while, and then recognizing that I could let go. Now I know how to let go of them quickly. As soon as I recognize them. Soon. I'll be able to let go of them as they arise. And maybe eventually, sometimes. I won't even generate unhelpful judgements at all. I'm almost there. Thanks for listening to suffer less with mindfulness. If you'd like more information about mindfulness courses offered by Mirador eco retreat. Or you want to check out some of the other guided meditations? Click the link for Mirador eco retreat. Or email Duka queen@skybeam.com, D U K K a Q U E N at S K Y. B E a m.com. Now let's meditate.
00:00:12
Hi, I'm Rita with Mirador eco retreat. We've chosen to go online only for the time being. So I'm offering these half hour monthly podcasts to share insights about how we really can suffer less with mindfulness. Please join me as I share a particular aspect of mindfulness in each episode, followed by a guided meditation. Everybody wants to talk about their Dingo. I met a woman in town and asked if her dog was an Australian cattle dog. Yes. She said, well crossed with Dingo. When I moved west and first met this breed, they call dingoes. I scoffed. Inwardly. I had a degree and I knew a lot about wild dogs. And these stocky speckled ranch dogs. Didn't remotely resemble the sleek native Dingo of Australia. I cringe now at how narrow minded I was. What if I had met the term Dingo back then with curiosity instead of judgment. I would have learned 30 years ago that the Australian cattle dog also called red or blue healer. Was selectively bred for herding cattle, long distances. By crossing, imported border collies with the native wild dingoes. Who's characteristics made them ideal for navigating the harsh terrain. As it happens. I only bothered to learn this fascinating history. Once I discovered that my little rescue dog had 20% red heeler DNA. So I researched that breed and now like everyone else, I want to talk about my Dingo. This illustrates for me how severely we can limit our lives with our judgments. When I was young and mindless. I decided I wasn't interested in a certain guy. Because he said rather, instead of rather. I thought he was being pretentious and it took me a long time to recognize that there's a part of the country where people say rather he wasn't putting on a fake British accent. It's just the way he was raised. I've judged people harshly all my life for the wrong words or poor grammar cause language comes easily to me. And maybe because I've been mocked and judged myself when I've used the wrong word. One time. I thought Intrepid was an insult because. I didn't know, it meant brave. And one time I said, Highness. Instead of heinous. About a crime. And I was mocked instead of. Met with compassion for having had to testify. So we can judge people harshly for things when they don't live up to our idea of what's right. But what an effort this is and how unpleasant that makes our experience of life. When instead we can just let it go. And chalk it up to how they were raised or their part of the country or the world, or a bad day or a slip of the tongue. And let it go. Just let it go. We're all making judgements every moment that we're alive. Some are necessary and important and make a positive difference in our lives and others are just a whole lot of mental gymnastics. The mind being busy, fortifying the ego. Or tearing it down, maybe the most damaging judgment habit we develop. Is judging ourselves harshly. Not pretty. Not smart enough. Stupid. Clumsy. Unlovable. We narrate a constant stream of snap judgments. About ourselves and other people. Sometimes positive, often negative. How they look what they're wearing, their weight, skin color, or apparent sexuality. She's rude. He's handsome. I'm not good enough. They're annoying. Whether we like something, they said, whether they said it right or wrong. Judging people for being different is a root source of bullying. Conflict and war. We also make helpful discerning judgments. To wear a coat when it's cold outside. Where a sensible shoes to go sightseeing. Call 9 1 1. If we witness a car wreck. Choose one food over another, according to our preference. Leash the dog wash the sheets, wear a mask, slow down the car. We're judging all the time. As I drove to town that day, I met the lady with the Dingo. I was observing my judgments along the way. The fields are greening up nicely. They should fix that fence. Hurry under the cliff. There's a fallen rock. Slow down here. There's always something crossing the road. Hey, slow down. You idiot. 10 seconds later and you'd have smashed that baby Marmot waddling across the road. I hope your hurry is worth taking a life. I carried that judgment a mile up the road, rehearsing. What I might've said to him. Until another judgment took its place. In town, it was use your turn signal, buddy. Ooh. I like the new color on that house. Revenge to her bumper sticker. Don't like those people. And in the store. she's Not wearing a mask, of course, but she's nice keeping her distance. Then salmon or Turkey for the cat. She's already getting enough fish. A mix of judging and discerning nonstop all the way to town and back again. Once home, it continued as it does. Gardner supply is so damn slow. Delivering orders. Sunshine. Yay. Sunshine, better. Go in and start laundry. Hm, last load was rugs. So do floormates now before close. But first mop the bathroom floor sink could use cleaning too. Oh, how happy to hear a Phoebe. Truck in the driveway, quick run inside. From inside. I see it's FedEx with the gardener supply order and laugh at myself. I'm learning to transform judgments. Once I had mentally yelled at the speeder. I practiced shifting my judgment to curiosity and compassion. I can't presume to know why he was driving so fast. Maybe he was speeding home because his kid fell off the barn loft. Instead of conversing with him in my head though. I could have just been grateful that he didn't hit the baby Marmot and let it go. Turning my attention to the beautiful day. The beautiful rocks and colors and trees. And the Creek running strong. Our minds put prodigious effort into judging everything all the time. These judgments are habitual. That's all they are. They keep the mental hamster wheel spinning. When we can let go of the mental habit of negative judgment. Especially, and starting with ourselves. We can replace it with habits that make life easier and happier. And help us get along with others. Our judgements often pounce like a predator on a prey animal latch on and worry it, tearing it apart. What if we don't waste all that effort in judging. But use it to ask. How can I shift this judgment into something that's healthier? More in alignment with my values of being kind. Compassionate. Tolerant. Generous. Whatever your values are. Practicing that shift, like all of these mindfulness skills is hard at first. That's why we call it practice. It takes a good deal of effort. In the beginning, it takes a thousand times a day saying, was that helpful or healthy? Or was that a deleterious or afflictive mental habit? Eventually over time, the shift becomes effortless. It's second nature to me now. Even though the judgment still arises, that that guy's speeding like a maniac and he's risking lives. My very next thought is how can I bring curiosity or compassion to that? First I learned to let go of afflictive stories or judgements. After holding on to them a while, and then recognizing that I could let go. Now I know how to let go of them quickly. As soon as I recognize them. Soon. I'll be able to let go of them as they arise. And maybe eventually, sometimes. I won't even generate unhelpful judgements at all. I'm almost there. Thanks for listening to suffer less with mindfulness. If you'd like more information about mindfulness courses offered by Mirador eco retreat. Or you want to check out some of the other guided meditations? Click the link for Mirador eco retreat. Or email Duka queen@skybeam.com, D U K K a Q U E N at S K Y. B E a m.com. Now let's meditate.
