WEBVTT
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And then I turned the plug around, something that would never happen in the United States, right?
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And the f the the fuse had just fallen out of the plug of the air conditioner.
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So I put it back in, plugged it in, and it works fine.
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I was like That's a fucking goddamn Christmas miracle, man.
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Like the fact that you didn't put that fuse like in a in a joint box or throw it out all time.
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I've just been using it as sort of like a fidget spinner for like like I've just I I just pick it up.
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It's on my desk and I pick it up if I'm in like a stupid meeting.
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We're still rolling here.
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Hello and welcome to Notes from a small, cold, dark, miserable island recorded not far from a river which is spelled T-H A M E S.
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But that's not pronounced Thames or even Tames, but Temes?
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What?
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I'm Mike.
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I'm Matt.
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Is this this is just now bothering you?
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This is this is just come to your attention?
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I every so often it enters my consciousness and it irritates me.
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Well, this does beg the question or or or or beg the you know, when are we gonna do pronunciation bowl?
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When when are is that gonna be our season finale, like pronunciation bowl?
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I've been I've been talking about it for ages.
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We've got to do pronunciation.
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I think why things are it what's with all those extra U's, you know what I mean?
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The superfluous U.
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That's the name of my indie bands.
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And then we don't don't even get into like uh place names, you know?
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I think if you look at Gloucester?
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Gloucester, how are you getting out of that?
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Lester.
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I mean, I spent my whole child wondering what what Worcester sauce was as and also how to say it.
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So just just a just an idea here that that you know you could be a rapper and call yourself the mess and spell it spell it the same way as Thames.
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Because it could be T-H-A, M-E-S.
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There's so many interpretations, yeah.
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Yeah, yeah.
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This is the mess.
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The mess.
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I don't know.
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It's a river.
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Hey, we're in London.
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And it's what day is it?
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This is the 25th of June.
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We're recording this a little bit early.
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Looking behind the curtain.
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Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain.
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Uh my household has just gotten deep into Wizard of Oz, so I might make a couple Wizard of Oz references by accident.
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But this is our use your illusion one and two, because we uh we are recording this just after we've recorded our previous episode.
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This is the first time we've we've stacked a back-to-backer.
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If you don't want that, Mike, if you don't want to, you know, show them how the sausage is made, you can just delete this from that.
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I know it's a little bit, you know, inside baseball.
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It's a little bit inside cricket.
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They don't say inside cricket here.
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They don't say inside no, they I think they say inside baseball too.
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They say inside baseball.
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See, another one.
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Another one of our concepts and phrases that they've just that Americanism.
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God monkey frunky.
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Pretty soon we'll be playing soccer.
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Well, one thing that they haven't done, Mike, I'll transition for you for free.
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One thing that they haven't done over here is adopted Fourth of July as a big party.
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I wonder why.
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I wonder why.
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Well, it's obvious.
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Uh we talked about this uh, you know, on one of our first episodes was was right around Thanksgiving Thanksgiving.
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And we addressed the awkwardness of celebrating a national holiday in a place where it isn't observed.
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So it's especially tricky, maybe maybe even like rude and obnoxious and American to celebrate independence from the country you're in while while you're in it.
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Um but I I really like the Fourth of July.
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And so I definitely wanted to do a Fourth of July episode to be like, hey, Americans in England, what is the Fourth of July about for you?
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Let's let's f sk sketch out actually what it means back home, right?
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I mean, I think probably listeners will be familiar, but uh you I like what your your sort of list, all day rolling drop-in slosh fests.
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This uh this seems like you have your priorities in order.
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Yeah.
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Well, I wanted to shout out, I want to specifically shout out and also to try to get the this dude as a listener.
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Um, just a friend of mine named Aaron and his wife Kristen for years and years in Chicago.
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They would do um the like the day before or a couple days before the 4th of July, they would do their Dependence Day uh house party, um, which was usually like the day before, like yeah, if if if 4th of July fell on a Sunday or a Monday, then they would do it on a Saturday, that sort of thing.
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And and there would be this all day rolling, come on in, BYOB, BYO snack, we'll have the grill going.
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Um there's a there's a kiddie pool.
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They're pre-gaming the Fourth of July.
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Pregaming the Fourth of July, Dependence Day.
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And you know, you know, Aaron and Kristen's politics are uh you know are super left, so they they weren't getting in the whole, you know, Chevrolet ads, um jingoistic flag waving thing, but they also, you know, they they sounds pretty traditional though.
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They believe at the same time.
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And yet, and yet pretty traditional.
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Nice.
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I like so so I you know, this is what I love about the Fourth of July.
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Um it takes place at a time of year when the weather is good.
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It's not it's not the dog days of August yet, um, and everybody gets a day off, even if it's in the middle of the week.
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Uh, there's not the same sort of Christmas and Thanksgiving expectation that you need to see your family, though many, many people will go and hang out with their families.
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And so I it gives rise to these friend-based house parties activities in Chicago.
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Me and my wife used to, you know, meet folks at the beach.
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Um yeah.
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Good old Fourth of July for grown-ups.
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Yeah.
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Um that's true.
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The the idea of having a a day off that everybody sort of has off is is good, isn't it?
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You know, it's like, you know, you have to set aside that weekend.
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You've just reminded me that um at one point, uh I suppose this was I suppose this was two years ago, um, nobody wanted to uh Joe Biden was having his last rally, his last campaign rally, right?
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Before he quit.
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Wow.
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Wow.
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He didn't know that we were he nobody knew that he was going to quit.
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It was July and he was still rumored in the room.
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It was early July.
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It was the 4th of July weekend, 2024.
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And um none of the reporters really wanted to go from Washington or New York or LA to Wisconsin.
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Yeah.
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And so for the um they sent me solo to do all the sort of like TV and and radio stuff, and I saw Sleepy Joe on stage at a w middle school in the uh suburbs of uh Madison uh give his sort of swang song.
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And um was it was farewell at the time?
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I don't remember what the timeline of that was.
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It wasn't sort of a goodbye, but he did mess up the year, I believe.
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Like what year it was.
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He gave a sort of a fiery 10-minute speech and uh jumbled up uh what election that he had actually won.
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Or I don't know.
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I thought maybe it was something like back in 1843.
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Like, no, Joe, it was 1773.
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It was it was very um yeah, the writing was on the wall then.
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Um, but uh that was perhaps I suppose I guess it was a memorable Fourth of July.
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Um I've had I've had maybe better ones though.
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Yeah.
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I think America has as well.
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Um I yeah, I I just yeah, you know, I just enjoy the uh a nice hot dog, a baseball game.
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Yeah, yeah.
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You could go to a ball game, yeah.
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You could like go to the amusement park, you could go to your local amphitheater and see a concert.
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Um now, small towns like the like the small town outside Cleveland I grew up in, because I was born in a small town, and I can breathe in a small town, um would have parades, you know, and just like your your local uh your local moose lodge and uh and baton twirling uh tweens uh would just trundle trundle down the main street and everyone would come for an hour and see their friends and neighbors in the back of pickup trucks.
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Absolutely.
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I love the parade.
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Throw throwing candies.
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Devotee of the Oak Park Fourth of July parade for sure.
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You know.
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Did you fire Oh yeah, definitely.
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Okay, definitely.
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Every year, the the fire trucks, the uh liberal pressure groups.
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Uh Did they have their float?
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That was that was it.
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Basically, it was just fire trucks and liberal pressure groups.
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But they throw the candy, you know what I mean?
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They throw the Tootsie rolls and my British children pick up the Tootsie rolls and throw them back because they hate them.
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Just pelting liberals and firemen alike.
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Quick can meet me with the Tootsie Rolls.
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Um I love it.
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I love it.
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It's it's great.
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All those things.
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Take them all.
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So yeah, it's kind of an it's kind of an inform, it's more uh it's more of an informal you can you can make up make up your activities.
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And maybe that's why maybe that's why it's a little bit when when I googled like what sort of Independence Day activities um are profanely available in London.
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There wasn't a great amount.
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I mean, there are there are there are many concerts, there are many like uh you know, music ensembles and and churches that are having great American songbook concerts.
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There's a there's an odd like bar crawl and wine tasting.
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Um, and some like his there's a couple historic walks.
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You can walk around and be like, this is this is the shit that they were rebelling against right here.
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That dickhead king sat and you know decreed some stuff.
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Um but attacks the tea bags and the windows, and they threw people in jail for printing pamphlets.
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And they brought them back here, and this is the jail?
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No, I don't I don't think so.
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That's good.
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That's good.
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It's interesting though.
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Um, it sounds a bit scattershot.
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I mean, I think like Thanksgiving, for whatever reason, like it will be pretty well established.
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There'll be like restaurants that offer Thanksgiving menus and stuff, and um you can you can definitely find that place.
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And then like your American friends definitely will have like a Thanksgiving thing, you know.
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Um sounds a little bit low-key.
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Yeah, weirdly.
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Yeah.
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Now I'm eager to hear if because London is a town where fireworks go off all the time.
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Uh it's a global city where you know lots of different nationalities and and religions uh have uh you know footholds, and so they have times of year when they set off fireworks, and New Year's obviously is a big time.
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Um and and so fireworks be happening all the time.
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Um it's it's it's better than uh you know bombs dropping.
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Um for but for my nervous family, we don't love it the most when you know over London Fields kaboom kaboom.
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Um so I'm wondering whether this 4th of July, I'm gonna keep an ear out to see uh to to hear if if anybody cheeky Americans are yeah, shooting anything off.
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Yeah, yeah.
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I've not I've not heard of that.
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My yeah, it's New Year's, um Fire Bonfire Night in early November, and and Diwali.
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Yeah, um the Hindu festival, those those are when it is.
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And in fact, we we we used to live near the big um Niesden Temple, so Diwali was a big one.
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And gosh, yeah, very smoky, very smoky.
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Um what's your what's your stance on fireworks?
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I am generally uh pro firework, um, but but have have obtained some sort of fireworks skepticism simply because that it is really bad for the air pollution, and uh now we have some cats and the cats just like freak out.
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So you you're not a fan.
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No, I'm not I'm generally not a fan, though a good sanctioned, organized, like I would I I in my Chicago years on a couple occasions went down to Navy Pier and saw the big show.
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Or on or on the fourth of July, you could just, you know, stake out a spot on on one of the many beaches and just and just look out and and see see them happen.
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But there were then all also these big, I can't remember the name of the park.
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Uh uh this is this is my brain melting.
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Um, but there was you know a big unsanctioned Fourth of July uh at at a north side park that was not far from my house that just every cowboy would just go take over this place.
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And it was like a scene out of the Warriors um with with bootleg fireworks going off.
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Ah, I've only got to remember the name of that park.
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It doesn't matter.
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Um so that's not my that's not my jam, but I do like a good, like a good civic leader.
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I love these, I love the footage of I I'm sure it's uh awful for the environment as well.
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The replacing the explosives uh with interesting drones.
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Oh yeah, the drone thing that's that's becoming a thing.
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I think yeah, fireworks are phasing out, they're gonna seem too low-tech pretty soon.
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It's gonna look like a really cool Bjork concert, you know, for the Fourth of July.
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Maybe even soundtracked by Bjork.
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We'll play her most patriotic American song.
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Yeah, yeah.
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Which is probably Army of Me.
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I was like, wait, that would be um Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, of course, Army of Me.
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The Oak Park was way too woke to have fireworks.
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They banned their fireworks, they donated the money to the poor.
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They were like, they scare children in small there was all sorts of things.
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There would be people grumbling about that, yeah.
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But you see, you just go to a neighboring suburb.
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We went we went to go see our friends.
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I had a another Fourth of July in Chicago, which was like, you know, a relatively well-off uh suburb, exurb, and it was just sort of classic.
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That classic Chicago hot dog, millions of people bringing millions of bottles of uh wine and beer to the park, sitting out there, and then you know, just air pollution for the next hour.
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Just boom-bada boom-bada boom.
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But then get get get you know, get in your car.
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You've maybe only had a couple beers and get back home.
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But by the time you get out of traffic, you know you're sober.
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It's fine.
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Did you have in the bu uh in Buffalo?
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Did you have one of these like classic um 60s, 70s uh concrete amphitheaters where where there would be concerts and like you know, the the journey foreigner uh reunion tour would come and play in the concert, like like Tinley Park in Chicago.
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It's Blossom Music Center in the Cleveland.
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Um there is um I I think there is a similar sort of thing in in Buffalo.
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There's a place called Art Park where people play.
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But the Fourth of July thing was always the some sort of iteration of the Beach Boys.
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Yeah.
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How there was like various Beach Boys iterations.
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We've still got Mike Love.
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Yeah, yeah, yeah.
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And they would play at the baseball stadium in in conjunction with a minor league baseball game.
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This sounds very, very low rent, right?
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But like they would play around the Fourth of July.
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Pretty American, like I I'd I would enjoy a minor league baseball game.
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I I thought that I had like hallucinated this when um yeah, when Brian Wilson died, I was like, uh I was like, did that actually happen in Buffalo?
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Like this weird sort of and then I had to look it up.
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I had to look up old issues of the Buffalo News.
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And it did, yes.
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The the the rump Mike Love thing came came through on an annual basis for several years on the 4th of July week of year.
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I just you just think they could have gotten a bigger gig somewhere.
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I don't know.
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I don't know, man.
00:16:41.519 --> 00:16:42.559
Buffalo, yeah, yeah.
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Geographically, I think Buffalo, you know, d do you know do you have knowledge from Buffalo history when you were in in middle school?
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Like, would did Buffalo see any skirmishes?
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Uh in the war.
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Um I know Cleveland didn't.
00:16:59.360 --> 00:16:59.919
No, no.
00:17:00.000 --> 00:17:00.720
I think no.
00:17:00.799 --> 00:17:07.279
They um the the town where I grew up basically was founded uh after the War of 1812.
00:17:07.599 --> 00:17:07.920
Oh, okay.
00:17:08.160 --> 00:17:09.680
That war that nobody remembers.
00:17:10.000 --> 00:17:11.519
Well, except that they burnt down the White House.
00:17:11.839 --> 00:17:12.960
They burnt down the White House.
00:17:13.279 --> 00:17:14.000
He's mother.
00:17:14.319 --> 00:17:16.720
Pretty s pretty soon people can be asking to do that again.
00:17:16.880 --> 00:17:20.559
I mean, let's not Well, I mean, it's three quarters of the way done already.
00:17:20.640 --> 00:17:21.279
Don't worry about it.
00:17:21.599 --> 00:17:24.559
We haven't even talked about the UFC Fighting Championship.
00:17:24.799 --> 00:17:34.720
Um they burned down the uh the little village of Buffalo in 1812, and people ran to the village where uh where I grew up, um, called Williamsville.
00:17:34.880 --> 00:17:35.119
Okay.
00:17:35.279 --> 00:17:43.200
And uh that that really sort of established it as a as a thriving base of operations uh until they rebuilt Buffalo and everybody sort of moved back.
00:17:43.359 --> 00:17:46.480
And then then people moved back to the suburbs after a while, you know.
00:17:46.880 --> 00:17:49.599
This is precisely why riots.
00:17:50.079 --> 00:17:51.039
Oh, okay.
00:17:51.519 --> 00:17:52.480
There's there you go.
00:17:52.559 --> 00:17:54.079
The history of uh Buffalo and the Arcade.
00:17:54.400 --> 00:17:58.000
Yeah, well, very linked to some pivotal moments in American history.
00:17:58.480 --> 00:17:59.200
Absolutely.
00:17:59.440 --> 00:18:00.000
Absolutely.
00:18:00.160 --> 00:18:01.440
Um so yes.
00:18:01.759 --> 00:18:07.599
Um uh not as far not Revolutionary War skirmishes as far as I know.
00:18:07.759 --> 00:18:12.160
Um hopefully I'm not embarrassing myself there by missing some big battle.
00:18:13.359 --> 00:18:31.680
I tried to look up um whether I I wanted to start a conspiracy theory that the founding fathers and the Continental Congress were like, you know, it must have been dragging on for for weeks into months about we can't go on like this.
00:18:32.000 --> 00:18:34.319
This king is murdering us.
00:18:34.880 --> 00:18:38.319
We've got our own identity over here, F this guy.
00:18:38.640 --> 00:18:41.680
We're gonna need to do something eventually.
00:18:41.839 --> 00:18:44.000
You know, we're gonna have to declare independence.
00:18:44.319 --> 00:18:51.839
And I just want to start a conspiracy theory where somebody was like, it was February, and he was like, Okay, okay, okay, I hear you.
00:18:52.079 --> 00:18:52.640
I hear you.
00:18:52.960 --> 00:18:54.640
And yes, I'm outraged as well.
00:18:55.119 --> 00:19:00.240
But if we're gonna do this, let's wait until the weather's nice.
00:19:01.599 --> 00:19:02.559
Because we're gonna win.
00:19:02.640 --> 00:19:02.960
This is crazy.
00:19:03.279 --> 00:19:04.640
I believe that we will win.
00:19:04.880 --> 00:19:07.359
And then uh So they were like thinking ahead.
00:19:07.440 --> 00:19:08.400
They were thinking ahead.
00:19:08.640 --> 00:19:09.920
This is gonna be our national day.
00:19:10.079 --> 00:19:10.319
Yeah.
00:19:10.480 --> 00:19:15.839
And the weather needs to be good because like we are making a nation of eternal optimists.
00:19:16.079 --> 00:19:26.880
Um We we wanna yearly have an opportunity in the in the, you know, not not the gross August summer, but nice July.
00:19:27.279 --> 00:19:28.799
We want to have these cookouts.
00:19:28.960 --> 00:19:35.839
I I decree I want an all-day rolling slosh fest, said Hamilton.
00:19:36.400 --> 00:19:38.160
Um Yeah.
00:19:38.240 --> 00:19:54.160
So this is my conspiracy theory is that they decided to hold the Continental Congress slash declare independence, but they waited until such a date that it would be uh that this you know national significant date would be a really good time for a holiday.
00:19:54.400 --> 00:19:56.400
I'm yeah, I'm now really stretching.
00:19:56.799 --> 00:19:58.000
I went to my Howard's Inn no evidence.
00:19:58.319 --> 00:19:58.400
Great.
00:19:58.480 --> 00:19:59.119
This is awesome.
00:19:59.359 --> 00:20:09.039
But I'm really stretching against my the the history here, but I isn't it that um was it signed on July the 4th or was it just announced on July the 4th?
00:20:09.359 --> 00:20:12.880
Well, this is the thing, is it like, yeah, July 2nd it was introduced.
00:20:13.119 --> 00:20:16.319
I don't know all the facts, but there is some like conjecture, like July 2nd.
00:20:18.559 --> 00:20:18.720
Right.
00:20:18.799 --> 00:20:20.480
Well, they had to pass the thing around, man.
00:20:20.640 --> 00:20:21.920
Couriers were quite slow.
00:20:22.079 --> 00:20:22.480
Yeah.
00:20:23.680 --> 00:20:27.440
I mean, in interestingly, like, isn't that the the Juneteenth story too?
00:20:27.759 --> 00:20:28.240
Oh, yeah, yeah.
00:20:28.480 --> 00:20:36.960
The Emancipation Proclamation was signed in early June, but then like it took a while to get to the No months, wasn't it?
00:20:37.039 --> 00:20:38.400
Oh, see, this is where we are shamed.
00:20:38.640 --> 00:20:38.960
It took a while.
00:20:39.359 --> 00:20:39.839
That's why we left.
00:20:40.160 --> 00:20:42.319
Some some time, some time, anyway.
00:20:42.559 --> 00:20:45.039
Um, Ward Wards did not get around.
00:20:45.119 --> 00:20:45.599
I mean, you know.
00:20:46.000 --> 00:20:48.480
The primitive fax machines of the 18th century.
00:20:49.119 --> 00:21:02.160
You know, um they probably they probably thought, well, look, you know, at at some point in our grand history of this nation, uh Chicago's gonna want to have a NASCAR race.
00:21:03.039 --> 00:21:05.920
And they cannot be driving around in February.
00:21:06.160 --> 00:21:08.160
This is ice, snow, no way.
00:21:08.559 --> 00:21:20.640
I envision a horseless buggy with many sponsorships plastered on its side, and a man named Jethro sitting on the cockpit.
00:21:20.799 --> 00:21:33.359
No, I didn't I don't know the yeah, I never actually witnessed the Fourth of July NASCAR race in Chicago because actually the weather was horrendous for those two uh races.
00:21:33.599 --> 00:21:47.039
Uh it was absolutely d disastrous, and like, you know, they were all driving around at the normal pace of Chicago traffic, which is about 30 miles per hour, plus some asshole who just tries to pass everyone.
00:21:47.119 --> 00:21:48.559
Like are we talking, yeah.
00:21:48.640 --> 00:21:50.319
Are we talking like Lakeshore Drive?
00:21:50.480 --> 00:21:54.079
There's like you know about four thirty to seven thirty.
00:21:54.160 --> 00:21:58.960
You just literally literally they were driving up Lakeshore Drive, but very slowly in heavy rain.
00:21:59.279 --> 00:21:59.599
Yeah.
00:22:00.880 --> 00:22:02.079
Not my vibe for a sporting event.
00:22:02.559 --> 00:22:03.440
Fourth of July.
00:22:03.920 --> 00:22:04.160
Yeah.
00:22:06.160 --> 00:22:12.640
I wanted to do, I wanted to sort of do a review of Founding Fathers pop culture, but there isn't that much, Mike.
00:22:12.799 --> 00:22:24.960
I mean, and before Hamilton came out, what, 10, 15 years ago, there's very little Founding Fathers related pop culture for us to, you know celebrate our history.
00:22:25.119 --> 00:22:29.440
There's a musical called 1776 that American musical theater nerds like.
00:22:29.680 --> 00:22:30.480
I don't know it.
00:22:31.039 --> 00:22:32.079
I never heard of that before.
00:22:32.240 --> 00:22:32.640
Yeah.
00:22:32.880 --> 00:22:35.039
Um Hamilton Hamilton's the big dog.
00:22:35.759 --> 00:22:37.119
Hamilton's the big dog in the street.
00:22:37.359 --> 00:22:46.480
There's uh, you know, when you when you Google this, you're reminded of that uh HBO miniseries, uh John Adams with Paul Giamatti as John Adams.
00:22:49.200 --> 00:22:52.160
Paul Giamatti going, I am not drinking Merlot.
00:22:52.319 --> 00:23:02.240
Wait, no, it's uh I'm not drinking mead, said John Adams famously to Washington as they went on their uh you know.
00:23:02.880 --> 00:23:09.519
Oh uh the Saturday Night Live uh Nate Bargazzi uh sketch they send this to everybody.
00:23:10.000 --> 00:23:11.039
Yeah, that's a solid one.
00:23:11.359 --> 00:23:18.480
Where he also he does the bit that I just uh unconsciously copied of like I envision the bullshit of the future.
00:23:19.680 --> 00:23:22.640
How many uh feet will be in a yard?
00:23:23.200 --> 00:23:23.599
Three.
00:23:23.920 --> 00:23:24.559
What?
00:23:26.160 --> 00:23:30.000
Um So what are you gonna so what do you do you have any plans for the Fourth of July?
00:23:30.160 --> 00:23:35.680
I I I don't like I've completely been waylaid by this uh whole whole episode.
00:23:35.839 --> 00:23:37.839
I feel like I now need to get some plans.
00:23:38.079 --> 00:23:47.119
I don't know if I've actually had plans, although I'm sure that maybe we've hung out on a 4th of July to be American all broy, but like I can't remember.
00:23:47.599 --> 00:23:52.160
Maybe doing anything other than the other specifically American on the 4th of July.
00:23:52.400 --> 00:24:06.079
I think if you go back into our previous episodes, uh the Sasha episode, you know, when we revealed my bullying alley DJ pass, I think I may have I think I DJed at All-Star Lane's Bayswater one 4th of July.
00:24:06.160 --> 00:24:08.240
Is that the one is that one of the times that you came through?
00:24:08.720 --> 00:24:09.119
Possibly.
00:24:09.359 --> 00:24:19.279
I know I went to a US England, I DJed during a US England World Cup match at All-Star Lane's, you know, in 2011 or 12 or something.
00:24:19.359 --> 00:24:19.519
No.
00:24:19.839 --> 00:24:21.119
I was I I hope I was there.
00:24:21.279 --> 00:24:23.920
If I if I wasn't, I want to go back and and and go there.
00:24:24.240 --> 00:24:24.720
Let's do it.
00:24:24.960 --> 00:24:26.400
Let's pop in the old time machine.
00:24:26.640 --> 00:24:34.000
Was it when you were DJing the 4th of July, was it an official American-themed uh All-Star Lanes event?
00:24:34.880 --> 00:24:37.279
Well, no, it was just sort of every every every Friday.
00:24:39.279 --> 00:24:40.079
There were two of us.
00:24:40.880 --> 00:24:43.920
But the the the place was, you know, Americana themed.
00:24:44.000 --> 00:24:51.200
And so these American employees, they were like, Yeah, come on, I know you're gonna play a bunch of like Memphis Soul classics.
00:24:51.680 --> 00:24:54.000
People should go back and listen to that episode.
00:24:54.400 --> 00:24:55.279
The Sasha episode.
00:24:55.519 --> 00:24:56.160
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:24:56.640 --> 00:24:59.200
You should go back and I should go back and listen to it too.
00:24:59.920 --> 00:25:03.279
Because apparently it I didn't it didn't get into my brain.
00:25:03.920 --> 00:25:06.720
Well, this this 4th of July lands on a Saturday.
00:25:06.880 --> 00:25:11.599
If you are hearing this, then please email us at colddarkmiserablepod at gmail.com.
00:25:11.759 --> 00:25:15.039
We're gonna release this one um a little bit before the 4th of July.
00:25:15.119 --> 00:25:17.599
So if you you know, give us give us a tip.
00:25:17.759 --> 00:25:19.440
What should we do for the 4th of July?
00:25:19.519 --> 00:25:21.920
This the uh Saturday, July 4th.
00:25:22.000 --> 00:25:23.599
I'm sure the World Cup will be going.
00:25:23.839 --> 00:25:28.960
Um I'm I'm at work that day, but um I get off at nine, so I could still go.
00:25:29.359 --> 00:25:33.119
Yeah, after you get off, let's uh let's do something yanky.
00:25:34.480 --> 00:25:40.720
Hey Yeah, tell us what to do.
00:25:40.880 --> 00:25:41.119
Yeah.
00:25:41.279 --> 00:25:42.000
Tell us what to do.
00:25:42.079 --> 00:25:43.039
We have no plans.
00:25:43.759 --> 00:25:45.440
Why do we even do this episode?
00:25:45.519 --> 00:25:47.839
Why do we do this use your illusion part two?
00:25:48.559 --> 00:25:50.720
Well, I feel like it needs to be acknowledged.
00:25:50.799 --> 00:25:51.680
And that's sort of the thing.
00:25:51.759 --> 00:25:54.319
We there's uh we'll come back to you at Labor Day.
00:25:55.839 --> 00:26:01.039
Celebrate labor, celebrate the great labor tradition and the wobblies.
00:26:02.559 --> 00:26:09.920
Uh that email address again colddarkmiserable pod at gmail.com.
00:26:10.880 --> 00:26:13.119
You can check us on all the platforms.
00:26:13.200 --> 00:26:13.759
We're on YouTube.
00:26:14.079 --> 00:26:16.559
Check out some of our YouTube shorts with more on the way.
00:26:17.119 --> 00:26:19.759
Give us our Fourth of July gift of a five-star rating.
00:26:20.000 --> 00:26:20.160
Yep.
00:26:20.720 --> 00:26:22.960
July 4th, five stars.
00:26:23.279 --> 00:26:24.000
Fourth, five.
00:26:24.079 --> 00:26:25.599
Not fifth, four stars.
00:26:26.240 --> 00:26:27.759
Fourth, five stars.
00:26:30.400 --> 00:26:49.599
So at my workplace where I'll be on the fourth of July, we had uh within the last couple months uh a performance where the the title of the show was was the name of two uh two lovers, and it was uh one of the one of them was Jack, uh, and then it was the ladies.
00:26:49.839 --> 00:26:51.359
Well, I'll just say it was Jack and Louise.
00:26:51.440 --> 00:26:58.720
And so I spent the whole run of this show just in my head being like, little ditty about Jack and Louise.
00:26:59.200 --> 00:27:03.200
And and you know, English people under 30 were like, What why do you keep singing that?
00:27:03.279 --> 00:27:06.240
And I was like, hold on, let me, you don't know, you don't know, let me play this for you.
00:27:06.400 --> 00:27:14.240
And it and I learned that English people under 30 have no idea who John Mellencamp is.
00:27:14.640 --> 00:27:32.000
And this was pretty, pretty painful for me as an American immigrant, that like John Mellencamp is being is being lost to history to uh uh you know, to non to non-Americans, even though he's pretty American coded is Mellenkamp.
00:27:33.359 --> 00:27:55.279
So I thought to really cement what we're doing here, being independent from America, but also keeping the American spirit, not the cigarette, alive, that I would attribute to Mellencamp with a new theme song for our podcast.
00:27:55.599 --> 00:27:56.720
All right, all right.
00:27:57.279 --> 00:27:57.920
Let's hear it.
00:27:58.319 --> 00:27:59.119
Are you ready?
00:27:59.599 --> 00:28:00.240
I think so.
00:28:00.400 --> 00:28:01.200
Okay, great.
00:28:01.920 --> 00:28:09.519
Beow down down, bow down, bow down, down, down, down, down.
00:28:10.000 --> 00:28:16.720
There's an orange man in a white house crumbling down his neighbor.
00:28:18.480 --> 00:28:22.880
He's got a wrestling ring plunked down in the front yard.
00:28:23.119 --> 00:28:24.079
Uh update.
00:28:24.319 --> 00:28:28.880
He's got a chain link fence round a toxic duck pond.
00:28:29.039 --> 00:28:32.640
His cronies think they got it so good.
00:28:34.480 --> 00:28:38.640
And we're two old dads with a podcast.
00:28:39.200 --> 00:28:42.079
We met at a college radio station.
00:28:42.799 --> 00:28:51.119
We got visa tales, I got cheesy rhymes for immigrants to this cold, dark, miserable nation.
00:28:52.480 --> 00:28:59.599
See they told us when we were younger, anyone can grow up to be president.
00:29:00.880 --> 00:29:07.279
But a narcissistic, racist, rapist, comman, clown probably wasn't worth they meant.
00:29:08.480 --> 00:29:12.559
So we ain't in America for 250.
00:29:12.960 --> 00:29:14.799
No, we ain't in America.
00:29:15.119 --> 00:29:20.880
We don't have to see daily all the hate in America for rationality.
00:29:21.759 --> 00:29:22.319
Yeah.
00:29:23.200 --> 00:29:26.400
Non-detached houses for Mike and me.
00:29:27.119 --> 00:29:30.559
Fourth of July in the UK for a Mike and me.
00:29:31.119 --> 00:29:32.079
Oh yeah.
00:29:34.319 --> 00:29:35.359
Ain't in America.
00:00:00.160 --> 00:00:03.839
And then I turned the plug around, something that would never happen in the United States, right?
00:00:04.240 --> 00:00:07.679
And the f the the fuse had just fallen out of the plug of the air conditioner.
00:00:07.759 --> 00:00:10.640
So I put it back in, plugged it in, and it works fine.
00:00:10.800 --> 00:00:13.839
I was like That's a fucking goddamn Christmas miracle, man.
00:00:14.160 --> 00:00:18.800
Like the fact that you didn't put that fuse like in a in a joint box or throw it out all time.
00:00:19.120 --> 00:00:23.280
I've just been using it as sort of like a fidget spinner for like like I've just I I just pick it up.
00:00:23.359 --> 00:00:26.160
It's on my desk and I pick it up if I'm in like a stupid meeting.
00:00:29.600 --> 00:00:30.960
We're still rolling here.
00:00:37.920 --> 00:00:48.880
Hello and welcome to Notes from a small, cold, dark, miserable island recorded not far from a river which is spelled T-H A M E S.
00:00:49.280 --> 00:00:55.520
But that's not pronounced Thames or even Tames, but Temes?
00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:56.320
What?
00:00:56.479 --> 00:00:57.039
I'm Mike.
00:00:57.280 --> 00:00:57.759
I'm Matt.
00:00:57.920 --> 00:01:01.119
Is this this is just now bothering you?
00:01:01.280 --> 00:01:03.359
This is this is just come to your attention?
00:01:03.679 --> 00:01:08.079
I every so often it enters my consciousness and it irritates me.
00:01:08.400 --> 00:01:17.760
Well, this does beg the question or or or or beg the you know, when are we gonna do pronunciation bowl?
00:01:17.920 --> 00:01:20.959
When when are is that gonna be our season finale, like pronunciation bowl?
00:01:21.120 --> 00:01:22.640
I've been I've been talking about it for ages.
00:01:22.959 --> 00:01:24.400
We've got to do pronunciation.
00:01:24.640 --> 00:01:30.319
I think why things are it what's with all those extra U's, you know what I mean?
00:01:30.640 --> 00:01:31.599
The superfluous U.
00:01:31.840 --> 00:01:32.799
That's the name of my indie bands.
00:01:33.200 --> 00:01:36.959
And then we don't don't even get into like uh place names, you know?
00:01:37.280 --> 00:01:38.560
I think if you look at Gloucester?
00:01:38.719 --> 00:01:40.319
Gloucester, how are you getting out of that?
00:01:40.480 --> 00:01:40.640
Lester.
00:01:41.280 --> 00:01:48.000
I mean, I spent my whole child wondering what what Worcester sauce was as and also how to say it.
00:01:48.239 --> 00:01:59.359
So just just a just an idea here that that you know you could be a rapper and call yourself the mess and spell it spell it the same way as Thames.
00:02:00.400 --> 00:02:02.560
Because it could be T-H-A, M-E-S.
00:02:02.879 --> 00:02:04.159
There's so many interpretations, yeah.
00:02:04.319 --> 00:02:04.879
Yeah, yeah.
00:02:04.959 --> 00:02:05.840
This is the mess.
00:02:06.159 --> 00:02:06.799
The mess.
00:02:07.439 --> 00:02:08.240
I don't know.
00:02:09.360 --> 00:02:10.400
It's a river.
00:02:11.599 --> 00:02:13.919
Hey, we're in London.
00:02:16.719 --> 00:02:18.960
And it's what day is it?
00:02:19.120 --> 00:02:21.520
This is the 25th of June.
00:02:22.560 --> 00:02:23.919
We're recording this a little bit early.
00:02:24.240 --> 00:02:25.360
Looking behind the curtain.
00:02:25.520 --> 00:02:27.919
Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain.
00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:33.840
Uh my household has just gotten deep into Wizard of Oz, so I might make a couple Wizard of Oz references by accident.
00:02:34.159 --> 00:02:41.520
But this is our use your illusion one and two, because we uh we are recording this just after we've recorded our previous episode.
00:02:41.599 --> 00:02:44.240
This is the first time we've we've stacked a back-to-backer.
00:02:44.719 --> 00:02:49.919
If you don't want that, Mike, if you don't want to, you know, show them how the sausage is made, you can just delete this from that.
00:02:50.159 --> 00:02:52.319
I know it's a little bit, you know, inside baseball.
00:02:52.879 --> 00:02:54.159
It's a little bit inside cricket.
00:02:54.479 --> 00:02:55.599
They don't say inside cricket here.
00:02:56.159 --> 00:02:58.800
They don't say inside no, they I think they say inside baseball too.
00:02:59.039 --> 00:03:00.159
They say inside baseball.
00:03:00.400 --> 00:03:01.199
See, another one.
00:03:01.360 --> 00:03:06.240
Another one of our concepts and phrases that they've just that Americanism.
00:03:06.479 --> 00:03:08.719
God monkey frunky.
00:03:09.120 --> 00:03:10.800
Pretty soon we'll be playing soccer.
00:03:11.199 --> 00:03:15.199
Well, one thing that they haven't done, Mike, I'll transition for you for free.
00:03:15.360 --> 00:03:23.439
One thing that they haven't done over here is adopted Fourth of July as a big party.
00:03:23.840 --> 00:03:24.560
I wonder why.
00:03:24.719 --> 00:03:25.360
I wonder why.
00:03:25.680 --> 00:03:27.439
Well, it's obvious.
00:03:27.840 --> 00:03:34.719
Uh we talked about this uh, you know, on one of our first episodes was was right around Thanksgiving Thanksgiving.
00:03:34.800 --> 00:03:40.000
And we addressed the awkwardness of celebrating a national holiday in a place where it isn't observed.
00:03:40.240 --> 00:03:52.319
So it's especially tricky, maybe maybe even like rude and obnoxious and American to celebrate independence from the country you're in while while you're in it.
00:03:52.479 --> 00:03:56.639
Um but I I really like the Fourth of July.
00:03:56.719 --> 00:04:08.319
And so I definitely wanted to do a Fourth of July episode to be like, hey, Americans in England, what is the Fourth of July about for you?
00:04:09.120 --> 00:04:13.840
Let's let's f sk sketch out actually what it means back home, right?
00:04:13.919 --> 00:04:23.199
I mean, I think probably listeners will be familiar, but uh you I like what your your sort of list, all day rolling drop-in slosh fests.
00:04:23.279 --> 00:04:25.680
This uh this seems like you have your priorities in order.
00:04:26.000 --> 00:04:26.319
Yeah.
00:04:26.480 --> 00:04:32.000
Well, I wanted to shout out, I want to specifically shout out and also to try to get the this dude as a listener.
00:04:32.160 --> 00:04:38.160
Um, just a friend of mine named Aaron and his wife Kristen for years and years in Chicago.
00:04:38.480 --> 00:04:58.000
They would do um the like the day before or a couple days before the 4th of July, they would do their Dependence Day uh house party, um, which was usually like the day before, like yeah, if if if 4th of July fell on a Sunday or a Monday, then they would do it on a Saturday, that sort of thing.
00:04:58.160 --> 00:05:06.240
And and there would be this all day rolling, come on in, BYOB, BYO snack, we'll have the grill going.
00:05:06.639 --> 00:05:08.879
Um there's a there's a kiddie pool.
00:05:09.120 --> 00:05:10.480
They're pre-gaming the Fourth of July.
00:05:10.720 --> 00:05:12.720
Pregaming the Fourth of July, Dependence Day.
00:05:12.959 --> 00:05:27.360
And you know, you know, Aaron and Kristen's politics are uh you know are super left, so they they weren't getting in the whole, you know, Chevrolet ads, um jingoistic flag waving thing, but they also, you know, they they sounds pretty traditional though.
00:05:27.519 --> 00:05:28.399
They believe at the same time.
00:05:28.800 --> 00:05:32.639
And yet, and yet pretty traditional.
00:05:32.959 --> 00:05:33.360
Nice.
00:05:33.600 --> 00:05:37.199
I like so so I you know, this is what I love about the Fourth of July.
00:05:37.360 --> 00:05:41.199
Um it takes place at a time of year when the weather is good.
00:05:41.439 --> 00:05:49.839
It's not it's not the dog days of August yet, um, and everybody gets a day off, even if it's in the middle of the week.
00:05:50.000 --> 00:05:59.360
Uh, there's not the same sort of Christmas and Thanksgiving expectation that you need to see your family, though many, many people will go and hang out with their families.
00:05:59.519 --> 00:06:06.560
And so I it gives rise to these friend-based house parties activities in Chicago.
00:06:06.720 --> 00:06:09.680
Me and my wife used to, you know, meet folks at the beach.
00:06:10.000 --> 00:06:11.040
Um yeah.
00:06:11.600 --> 00:06:14.399
Good old Fourth of July for grown-ups.
00:06:15.120 --> 00:06:15.519
Yeah.
00:06:15.680 --> 00:06:16.959
Um that's true.
00:06:17.120 --> 00:06:23.519
The the idea of having a a day off that everybody sort of has off is is good, isn't it?
00:06:23.600 --> 00:06:26.319
You know, it's like, you know, you have to set aside that weekend.
00:06:26.560 --> 00:06:42.160
You've just reminded me that um at one point, uh I suppose this was I suppose this was two years ago, um, nobody wanted to uh Joe Biden was having his last rally, his last campaign rally, right?
00:06:42.399 --> 00:06:43.360
Before he quit.
00:06:43.600 --> 00:06:43.759
Wow.
00:06:43.920 --> 00:06:44.000
Wow.
00:06:44.160 --> 00:06:46.560
He didn't know that we were he nobody knew that he was going to quit.
00:06:46.879 --> 00:06:48.480
It was July and he was still rumored in the room.
00:06:48.639 --> 00:06:49.360
It was early July.
00:06:49.600 --> 00:06:51.680
It was the 4th of July weekend, 2024.
00:06:52.319 --> 00:06:58.319
And um none of the reporters really wanted to go from Washington or New York or LA to Wisconsin.
00:06:58.560 --> 00:06:58.879
Yeah.
00:06:59.120 --> 00:07:15.120
And so for the um they sent me solo to do all the sort of like TV and and radio stuff, and I saw Sleepy Joe on stage at a w middle school in the uh suburbs of uh Madison uh give his sort of swang song.
00:07:15.199 --> 00:07:18.079
And um was it was farewell at the time?
00:07:18.160 --> 00:07:19.600
I don't remember what the timeline of that was.
00:07:20.079 --> 00:07:25.199
It wasn't sort of a goodbye, but he did mess up the year, I believe.
00:07:26.399 --> 00:07:27.199
Like what year it was.
00:07:27.600 --> 00:07:34.399
He gave a sort of a fiery 10-minute speech and uh jumbled up uh what election that he had actually won.
00:07:34.560 --> 00:07:35.120
Or I don't know.
00:07:35.839 --> 00:07:38.879
I thought maybe it was something like back in 1843.
00:07:39.120 --> 00:07:41.279
Like, no, Joe, it was 1773.
00:07:41.600 --> 00:07:46.959
It was it was very um yeah, the writing was on the wall then.
00:07:47.199 --> 00:07:53.120
Um, but uh that was perhaps I suppose I guess it was a memorable Fourth of July.
00:07:53.199 --> 00:07:55.759
Um I've had I've had maybe better ones though.
00:07:56.639 --> 00:07:57.279
Yeah.
00:07:57.680 --> 00:08:00.000
I think America has as well.
00:08:01.279 --> 00:08:10.560
Um I yeah, I I just yeah, you know, I just enjoy the uh a nice hot dog, a baseball game.
00:08:10.800 --> 00:08:11.360
Yeah, yeah.
00:08:11.519 --> 00:08:13.279
You could go to a ball game, yeah.
00:08:13.439 --> 00:08:20.240
You could like go to the amusement park, you could go to your local amphitheater and see a concert.
00:08:20.560 --> 00:08:52.720
Um now, small towns like the like the small town outside Cleveland I grew up in, because I was born in a small town, and I can breathe in a small town, um would have parades, you know, and just like your your local uh your local moose lodge and uh and baton twirling uh tweens uh would just trundle trundle down the main street and everyone would come for an hour and see their friends and neighbors in the back of pickup trucks.
00:08:53.039 --> 00:08:53.519
Absolutely.
00:08:54.000 --> 00:08:54.879
I love the parade.
00:08:55.120 --> 00:08:56.240
Throw throwing candies.
00:08:57.120 --> 00:09:01.919
Devotee of the Oak Park Fourth of July parade for sure.
00:09:02.159 --> 00:09:02.720
You know.
00:09:03.279 --> 00:09:05.279
Did you fire Oh yeah, definitely.
00:09:05.440 --> 00:09:06.080
Okay, definitely.
00:09:06.480 --> 00:09:11.279
Every year, the the fire trucks, the uh liberal pressure groups.
00:09:11.440 --> 00:09:13.279
Uh Did they have their float?
00:09:13.519 --> 00:09:14.159
That was that was it.
00:09:14.320 --> 00:09:17.200
Basically, it was just fire trucks and liberal pressure groups.
00:09:17.360 --> 00:09:19.279
But they throw the candy, you know what I mean?
00:09:19.440 --> 00:09:26.080
They throw the Tootsie rolls and my British children pick up the Tootsie rolls and throw them back because they hate them.
00:09:27.120 --> 00:09:31.360
Just pelting liberals and firemen alike.
00:09:31.840 --> 00:09:33.919
Quick can meet me with the Tootsie Rolls.
00:09:34.559 --> 00:09:35.600
Um I love it.
00:09:35.759 --> 00:09:36.320
I love it.
00:09:36.480 --> 00:09:37.440
It's it's great.
00:09:37.679 --> 00:09:38.480
All those things.
00:09:39.039 --> 00:09:39.519
Take them all.
00:09:39.759 --> 00:09:46.639
So yeah, it's kind of an it's kind of an inform, it's more uh it's more of an informal you can you can make up make up your activities.
00:09:46.720 --> 00:09:56.960
And maybe that's why maybe that's why it's a little bit when when I googled like what sort of Independence Day activities um are profanely available in London.
00:09:57.120 --> 00:09:58.399
There wasn't a great amount.
00:09:58.559 --> 00:10:07.039
I mean, there are there are there are many concerts, there are many like uh you know, music ensembles and and churches that are having great American songbook concerts.
00:10:07.200 --> 00:10:11.919
There's a there's an odd like bar crawl and wine tasting.
00:10:12.080 --> 00:10:15.200
Um, and some like his there's a couple historic walks.
00:10:15.279 --> 00:10:21.279
You can walk around and be like, this is this is the shit that they were rebelling against right here.
00:10:21.600 --> 00:10:25.519
That dickhead king sat and you know decreed some stuff.
00:10:25.759 --> 00:10:32.720
Um but attacks the tea bags and the windows, and they threw people in jail for printing pamphlets.
00:10:33.120 --> 00:10:35.200
And they brought them back here, and this is the jail?
00:10:35.279 --> 00:10:36.960
No, I don't I don't think so.
00:10:37.279 --> 00:10:37.759
That's good.
00:10:38.559 --> 00:10:38.960
That's good.
00:10:39.120 --> 00:10:39.919
It's interesting though.
00:10:40.080 --> 00:10:41.919
Um, it sounds a bit scattershot.
00:10:42.159 --> 00:10:48.240
I mean, I think like Thanksgiving, for whatever reason, like it will be pretty well established.
00:10:48.399 --> 00:10:54.480
There'll be like restaurants that offer Thanksgiving menus and stuff, and um you can you can definitely find that place.
00:10:54.639 --> 00:10:58.720
And then like your American friends definitely will have like a Thanksgiving thing, you know.
00:10:58.960 --> 00:11:01.759
Um sounds a little bit low-key.
00:11:02.000 --> 00:11:03.360
Yeah, weirdly.
00:11:03.519 --> 00:11:03.840
Yeah.
00:11:04.080 --> 00:11:12.000
Now I'm eager to hear if because London is a town where fireworks go off all the time.
00:11:12.159 --> 00:11:27.279
Uh it's a global city where you know lots of different nationalities and and religions uh have uh you know footholds, and so they have times of year when they set off fireworks, and New Year's obviously is a big time.
00:11:27.600 --> 00:11:32.639
Um and and so fireworks be happening all the time.
00:11:32.879 --> 00:11:37.120
Um it's it's it's better than uh you know bombs dropping.
00:11:37.279 --> 00:11:45.440
Um for but for my nervous family, we don't love it the most when you know over London Fields kaboom kaboom.
00:11:46.000 --> 00:11:55.919
Um so I'm wondering whether this 4th of July, I'm gonna keep an ear out to see uh to to hear if if anybody cheeky Americans are yeah, shooting anything off.
00:11:56.159 --> 00:11:56.559
Yeah, yeah.
00:11:56.639 --> 00:11:57.759
I've not I've not heard of that.
00:11:57.919 --> 00:12:05.679
My yeah, it's New Year's, um Fire Bonfire Night in early November, and and Diwali.
00:12:06.080 --> 00:12:09.919
Yeah, um the Hindu festival, those those are when it is.
00:12:10.159 --> 00:12:16.320
And in fact, we we we used to live near the big um Niesden Temple, so Diwali was a big one.
00:12:16.639 --> 00:12:19.759
And gosh, yeah, very smoky, very smoky.
00:12:20.080 --> 00:12:23.039
Um what's your what's your stance on fireworks?
00:12:23.360 --> 00:12:40.320
I am generally uh pro firework, um, but but have have obtained some sort of fireworks skepticism simply because that it is really bad for the air pollution, and uh now we have some cats and the cats just like freak out.
00:12:40.639 --> 00:12:43.360
So you you're not a fan.
00:12:43.679 --> 00:12:54.960
No, I'm not I'm generally not a fan, though a good sanctioned, organized, like I would I I in my Chicago years on a couple occasions went down to Navy Pier and saw the big show.
00:12:55.279 --> 00:13:04.720
Or on or on the fourth of July, you could just, you know, stake out a spot on on one of the many beaches and just and just look out and and see see them happen.
00:13:04.879 --> 00:13:08.159
But there were then all also these big, I can't remember the name of the park.
00:13:08.240 --> 00:13:10.960
Uh uh this is this is my brain melting.
00:13:11.039 --> 00:13:23.200
Um, but there was you know a big unsanctioned Fourth of July uh at at a north side park that was not far from my house that just every cowboy would just go take over this place.
00:13:23.279 --> 00:13:29.679
And it was like a scene out of the Warriors um with with bootleg fireworks going off.
00:13:29.840 --> 00:13:31.919
Ah, I've only got to remember the name of that park.
00:13:32.000 --> 00:13:32.639
It doesn't matter.
00:13:33.039 --> 00:13:39.279
Um so that's not my that's not my jam, but I do like a good, like a good civic leader.
00:13:41.200 --> 00:13:45.360
I love these, I love the footage of I I'm sure it's uh awful for the environment as well.
00:13:45.519 --> 00:13:50.000
The replacing the explosives uh with interesting drones.
00:13:50.320 --> 00:13:52.799
Oh yeah, the drone thing that's that's becoming a thing.
00:13:53.039 --> 00:13:56.879
I think yeah, fireworks are phasing out, they're gonna seem too low-tech pretty soon.
00:13:57.200 --> 00:14:02.799
It's gonna look like a really cool Bjork concert, you know, for the Fourth of July.
00:14:02.960 --> 00:14:05.039
Maybe even soundtracked by Bjork.
00:14:05.279 --> 00:14:07.759
We'll play her most patriotic American song.
00:14:07.919 --> 00:14:08.240
Yeah, yeah.
00:14:08.480 --> 00:14:09.600
Which is probably Army of Me.
00:14:11.519 --> 00:14:16.080
I was like, wait, that would be um Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, of course, Army of Me.
00:14:17.360 --> 00:14:20.159
The Oak Park was way too woke to have fireworks.
00:14:20.399 --> 00:14:23.600
They banned their fireworks, they donated the money to the poor.
00:14:24.240 --> 00:14:27.679
They were like, they scare children in small there was all sorts of things.
00:14:27.759 --> 00:14:29.919
There would be people grumbling about that, yeah.
00:14:30.080 --> 00:14:31.840
But you see, you just go to a neighboring suburb.
00:14:31.919 --> 00:14:33.279
We went we went to go see our friends.
00:14:33.360 --> 00:14:43.120
I had a another Fourth of July in Chicago, which was like, you know, a relatively well-off uh suburb, exurb, and it was just sort of classic.
00:14:43.519 --> 00:14:56.159
That classic Chicago hot dog, millions of people bringing millions of bottles of uh wine and beer to the park, sitting out there, and then you know, just air pollution for the next hour.
00:14:56.240 --> 00:14:58.399
Just boom-bada boom-bada boom.
00:14:58.639 --> 00:15:01.120
But then get get get you know, get in your car.
00:15:01.200 --> 00:15:04.559
You've maybe only had a couple beers and get back home.
00:15:04.879 --> 00:15:08.159
But by the time you get out of traffic, you know you're sober.
00:15:08.320 --> 00:15:08.960
It's fine.
00:15:12.639 --> 00:15:15.120
Did you have in the bu uh in Buffalo?
00:15:15.279 --> 00:15:31.440
Did you have one of these like classic um 60s, 70s uh concrete amphitheaters where where there would be concerts and like you know, the the journey foreigner uh reunion tour would come and play in the concert, like like Tinley Park in Chicago.
00:15:31.600 --> 00:15:33.440
It's Blossom Music Center in the Cleveland.
00:15:35.039 --> 00:15:43.039
Um there is um I I think there is a similar sort of thing in in Buffalo.
00:15:43.120 --> 00:15:45.759
There's a place called Art Park where people play.
00:15:45.919 --> 00:15:51.440
But the Fourth of July thing was always the some sort of iteration of the Beach Boys.
00:15:51.519 --> 00:15:51.600
Yeah.
00:15:52.080 --> 00:15:54.080
How there was like various Beach Boys iterations.
00:15:54.799 --> 00:15:56.000
We've still got Mike Love.
00:15:56.320 --> 00:15:56.720
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:15:57.120 --> 00:16:02.879
And they would play at the baseball stadium in in conjunction with a minor league baseball game.
00:16:02.960 --> 00:16:04.960
This sounds very, very low rent, right?
00:16:05.120 --> 00:16:06.799
But like they would play around the Fourth of July.
00:16:07.360 --> 00:16:12.720
Pretty American, like I I'd I would enjoy a minor league baseball game.
00:16:12.960 --> 00:16:21.919
I I thought that I had like hallucinated this when um yeah, when Brian Wilson died, I was like, uh I was like, did that actually happen in Buffalo?
00:16:22.080 --> 00:16:24.080
Like this weird sort of and then I had to look it up.
00:16:24.159 --> 00:16:26.320
I had to look up old issues of the Buffalo News.
00:16:26.399 --> 00:16:27.279
And it did, yes.
00:16:27.440 --> 00:16:35.120
The the the rump Mike Love thing came came through on an annual basis for several years on the 4th of July week of year.
00:16:35.279 --> 00:16:38.720
I just you just think they could have gotten a bigger gig somewhere.
00:16:38.960 --> 00:16:39.919
I don't know.
00:16:40.399 --> 00:16:41.360
I don't know, man.
00:16:41.519 --> 00:16:42.559
Buffalo, yeah, yeah.
00:16:42.879 --> 00:16:49.840
Geographically, I think Buffalo, you know, d do you know do you have knowledge from Buffalo history when you were in in middle school?
00:16:49.919 --> 00:16:52.720
Like, would did Buffalo see any skirmishes?
00:16:53.840 --> 00:16:54.720
Uh in the war.
00:16:57.120 --> 00:16:59.120
Um I know Cleveland didn't.
00:16:59.360 --> 00:16:59.919
No, no.
00:17:00.000 --> 00:17:00.720
I think no.
00:17:00.799 --> 00:17:07.279
They um the the town where I grew up basically was founded uh after the War of 1812.
00:17:07.599 --> 00:17:07.920
Oh, okay.
00:17:08.160 --> 00:17:09.680
That war that nobody remembers.
00:17:10.000 --> 00:17:11.519
Well, except that they burnt down the White House.
00:17:11.839 --> 00:17:12.960
They burnt down the White House.
00:17:13.279 --> 00:17:14.000
He's mother.
00:17:14.319 --> 00:17:16.720
Pretty s pretty soon people can be asking to do that again.
00:17:16.880 --> 00:17:20.559
I mean, let's not Well, I mean, it's three quarters of the way done already.
00:17:20.640 --> 00:17:21.279
Don't worry about it.
00:17:21.599 --> 00:17:24.559
We haven't even talked about the UFC Fighting Championship.
00:17:24.799 --> 00:17:34.720
Um they burned down the uh the little village of Buffalo in 1812, and people ran to the village where uh where I grew up, um, called Williamsville.
00:17:34.880 --> 00:17:35.119
Okay.
00:17:35.279 --> 00:17:43.200
And uh that that really sort of established it as a as a thriving base of operations uh until they rebuilt Buffalo and everybody sort of moved back.
00:17:43.359 --> 00:17:46.480
And then then people moved back to the suburbs after a while, you know.
00:17:46.880 --> 00:17:49.599
This is precisely why riots.
00:17:50.079 --> 00:17:51.039
Oh, okay.
00:17:51.519 --> 00:17:52.480
There's there you go.
00:17:52.559 --> 00:17:54.079
The history of uh Buffalo and the Arcade.
00:17:54.400 --> 00:17:58.000
Yeah, well, very linked to some pivotal moments in American history.
00:17:58.480 --> 00:17:59.200
Absolutely.
00:17:59.440 --> 00:18:00.000
Absolutely.
00:18:00.160 --> 00:18:01.440
Um so yes.
00:18:01.759 --> 00:18:07.599
Um uh not as far not Revolutionary War skirmishes as far as I know.
00:18:07.759 --> 00:18:12.160
Um hopefully I'm not embarrassing myself there by missing some big battle.
00:18:13.359 --> 00:18:31.680
I tried to look up um whether I I wanted to start a conspiracy theory that the founding fathers and the Continental Congress were like, you know, it must have been dragging on for for weeks into months about we can't go on like this.
00:18:32.000 --> 00:18:34.319
This king is murdering us.
00:18:34.880 --> 00:18:38.319
We've got our own identity over here, F this guy.
00:18:38.640 --> 00:18:41.680
We're gonna need to do something eventually.
00:18:41.839 --> 00:18:44.000
You know, we're gonna have to declare independence.
00:18:44.319 --> 00:18:51.839
And I just want to start a conspiracy theory where somebody was like, it was February, and he was like, Okay, okay, okay, I hear you.
00:18:52.079 --> 00:18:52.640
I hear you.
00:18:52.960 --> 00:18:54.640
And yes, I'm outraged as well.
00:18:55.119 --> 00:19:00.240
But if we're gonna do this, let's wait until the weather's nice.
00:19:01.599 --> 00:19:02.559
Because we're gonna win.
00:19:02.640 --> 00:19:02.960
This is crazy.
00:19:03.279 --> 00:19:04.640
I believe that we will win.
00:19:04.880 --> 00:19:07.359
And then uh So they were like thinking ahead.
00:19:07.440 --> 00:19:08.400
They were thinking ahead.
00:19:08.640 --> 00:19:09.920
This is gonna be our national day.
00:19:10.079 --> 00:19:10.319
Yeah.
00:19:10.480 --> 00:19:15.839
And the weather needs to be good because like we are making a nation of eternal optimists.
00:19:16.079 --> 00:19:26.880
Um We we wanna yearly have an opportunity in the in the, you know, not not the gross August summer, but nice July.
00:19:27.279 --> 00:19:28.799
We want to have these cookouts.
00:19:28.960 --> 00:19:35.839
I I decree I want an all-day rolling slosh fest, said Hamilton.
00:19:36.400 --> 00:19:38.160
Um Yeah.
00:19:38.240 --> 00:19:54.160
So this is my conspiracy theory is that they decided to hold the Continental Congress slash declare independence, but they waited until such a date that it would be uh that this you know national significant date would be a really good time for a holiday.
00:19:54.400 --> 00:19:56.400
I'm yeah, I'm now really stretching.
00:19:56.799 --> 00:19:58.000
I went to my Howard's Inn no evidence.
00:19:58.319 --> 00:19:58.400
Great.
00:19:58.480 --> 00:19:59.119
This is awesome.
00:19:59.359 --> 00:20:09.039
But I'm really stretching against my the the history here, but I isn't it that um was it signed on July the 4th or was it just announced on July the 4th?
00:20:09.359 --> 00:20:12.880
Well, this is the thing, is it like, yeah, July 2nd it was introduced.
00:20:13.119 --> 00:20:16.319
I don't know all the facts, but there is some like conjecture, like July 2nd.
00:20:18.559 --> 00:20:18.720
Right.
00:20:18.799 --> 00:20:20.480
Well, they had to pass the thing around, man.
00:20:20.640 --> 00:20:21.920
Couriers were quite slow.
00:20:22.079 --> 00:20:22.480
Yeah.
00:20:23.680 --> 00:20:27.440
I mean, in interestingly, like, isn't that the the Juneteenth story too?
00:20:27.759 --> 00:20:28.240
Oh, yeah, yeah.
00:20:28.480 --> 00:20:36.960
The Emancipation Proclamation was signed in early June, but then like it took a while to get to the No months, wasn't it?
00:20:37.039 --> 00:20:38.400
Oh, see, this is where we are shamed.
00:20:38.640 --> 00:20:38.960
It took a while.
00:20:39.359 --> 00:20:39.839
That's why we left.
00:20:40.160 --> 00:20:42.319
Some some time, some time, anyway.
00:20:42.559 --> 00:20:45.039
Um, Ward Wards did not get around.
00:20:45.119 --> 00:20:45.599
I mean, you know.
00:20:46.000 --> 00:20:48.480
The primitive fax machines of the 18th century.
00:20:49.119 --> 00:21:02.160
You know, um they probably they probably thought, well, look, you know, at at some point in our grand history of this nation, uh Chicago's gonna want to have a NASCAR race.
00:21:03.039 --> 00:21:05.920
And they cannot be driving around in February.
00:21:06.160 --> 00:21:08.160
This is ice, snow, no way.
00:21:08.559 --> 00:21:20.640
I envision a horseless buggy with many sponsorships plastered on its side, and a man named Jethro sitting on the cockpit.
00:21:20.799 --> 00:21:33.359
No, I didn't I don't know the yeah, I never actually witnessed the Fourth of July NASCAR race in Chicago because actually the weather was horrendous for those two uh races.
00:21:33.599 --> 00:21:47.039
Uh it was absolutely d disastrous, and like, you know, they were all driving around at the normal pace of Chicago traffic, which is about 30 miles per hour, plus some asshole who just tries to pass everyone.
00:21:47.119 --> 00:21:48.559
Like are we talking, yeah.
00:21:48.640 --> 00:21:50.319
Are we talking like Lakeshore Drive?
00:21:50.480 --> 00:21:54.079
There's like you know about four thirty to seven thirty.
00:21:54.160 --> 00:21:58.960
You just literally literally they were driving up Lakeshore Drive, but very slowly in heavy rain.
00:21:59.279 --> 00:21:59.599
Yeah.
00:22:00.880 --> 00:22:02.079
Not my vibe for a sporting event.
00:22:02.559 --> 00:22:03.440
Fourth of July.
00:22:03.920 --> 00:22:04.160
Yeah.
00:22:06.160 --> 00:22:12.640
I wanted to do, I wanted to sort of do a review of Founding Fathers pop culture, but there isn't that much, Mike.
00:22:12.799 --> 00:22:24.960
I mean, and before Hamilton came out, what, 10, 15 years ago, there's very little Founding Fathers related pop culture for us to, you know celebrate our history.
00:22:25.119 --> 00:22:29.440
There's a musical called 1776 that American musical theater nerds like.
00:22:29.680 --> 00:22:30.480
I don't know it.
00:22:31.039 --> 00:22:32.079
I never heard of that before.
00:22:32.240 --> 00:22:32.640
Yeah.
00:22:32.880 --> 00:22:35.039
Um Hamilton Hamilton's the big dog.
00:22:35.759 --> 00:22:37.119
Hamilton's the big dog in the street.
00:22:37.359 --> 00:22:46.480
There's uh, you know, when you when you Google this, you're reminded of that uh HBO miniseries, uh John Adams with Paul Giamatti as John Adams.
00:22:49.200 --> 00:22:52.160
Paul Giamatti going, I am not drinking Merlot.
00:22:52.319 --> 00:23:02.240
Wait, no, it's uh I'm not drinking mead, said John Adams famously to Washington as they went on their uh you know.
00:23:02.880 --> 00:23:09.519
Oh uh the Saturday Night Live uh Nate Bargazzi uh sketch they send this to everybody.
00:23:10.000 --> 00:23:11.039
Yeah, that's a solid one.
00:23:11.359 --> 00:23:18.480
Where he also he does the bit that I just uh unconsciously copied of like I envision the bullshit of the future.
00:23:19.680 --> 00:23:22.640
How many uh feet will be in a yard?
00:23:23.200 --> 00:23:23.599
Three.
00:23:23.920 --> 00:23:24.559
What?
00:23:26.160 --> 00:23:30.000
Um So what are you gonna so what do you do you have any plans for the Fourth of July?
00:23:30.160 --> 00:23:35.680
I I I don't like I've completely been waylaid by this uh whole whole episode.
00:23:35.839 --> 00:23:37.839
I feel like I now need to get some plans.
00:23:38.079 --> 00:23:47.119
I don't know if I've actually had plans, although I'm sure that maybe we've hung out on a 4th of July to be American all broy, but like I can't remember.
00:23:47.599 --> 00:23:52.160
Maybe doing anything other than the other specifically American on the 4th of July.
00:23:52.400 --> 00:24:06.079
I think if you go back into our previous episodes, uh the Sasha episode, you know, when we revealed my bullying alley DJ pass, I think I may have I think I DJed at All-Star Lane's Bayswater one 4th of July.
00:24:06.160 --> 00:24:08.240
Is that the one is that one of the times that you came through?
00:24:08.720 --> 00:24:09.119
Possibly.
00:24:09.359 --> 00:24:19.279
I know I went to a US England, I DJed during a US England World Cup match at All-Star Lane's, you know, in 2011 or 12 or something.
00:24:19.359 --> 00:24:19.519
No.
00:24:19.839 --> 00:24:21.119
I was I I hope I was there.
00:24:21.279 --> 00:24:23.920
If I if I wasn't, I want to go back and and and go there.
00:24:24.240 --> 00:24:24.720
Let's do it.
00:24:24.960 --> 00:24:26.400
Let's pop in the old time machine.
00:24:26.640 --> 00:24:34.000
Was it when you were DJing the 4th of July, was it an official American-themed uh All-Star Lanes event?
00:24:34.880 --> 00:24:37.279
Well, no, it was just sort of every every every Friday.
00:24:39.279 --> 00:24:40.079
There were two of us.
00:24:40.880 --> 00:24:43.920
But the the the place was, you know, Americana themed.
00:24:44.000 --> 00:24:51.200
And so these American employees, they were like, Yeah, come on, I know you're gonna play a bunch of like Memphis Soul classics.
00:24:51.680 --> 00:24:54.000
People should go back and listen to that episode.
00:24:54.400 --> 00:24:55.279
The Sasha episode.
00:24:55.519 --> 00:24:56.160
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:24:56.640 --> 00:24:59.200
You should go back and I should go back and listen to it too.
00:24:59.920 --> 00:25:03.279
Because apparently it I didn't it didn't get into my brain.
00:25:03.920 --> 00:25:06.720
Well, this this 4th of July lands on a Saturday.
00:25:06.880 --> 00:25:11.599
If you are hearing this, then please email us at colddarkmiserablepod at gmail.com.
00:25:11.759 --> 00:25:15.039
We're gonna release this one um a little bit before the 4th of July.
00:25:15.119 --> 00:25:17.599
So if you you know, give us give us a tip.
00:25:17.759 --> 00:25:19.440
What should we do for the 4th of July?
00:25:19.519 --> 00:25:21.920
This the uh Saturday, July 4th.
00:25:22.000 --> 00:25:23.599
I'm sure the World Cup will be going.
00:25:23.839 --> 00:25:28.960
Um I'm I'm at work that day, but um I get off at nine, so I could still go.
00:25:29.359 --> 00:25:33.119
Yeah, after you get off, let's uh let's do something yanky.
00:25:34.480 --> 00:25:40.720
Hey Yeah, tell us what to do.
00:25:40.880 --> 00:25:41.119
Yeah.
00:25:41.279 --> 00:25:42.000
Tell us what to do.
00:25:42.079 --> 00:25:43.039
We have no plans.
00:25:43.759 --> 00:25:45.440
Why do we even do this episode?
00:25:45.519 --> 00:25:47.839
Why do we do this use your illusion part two?
00:25:48.559 --> 00:25:50.720
Well, I feel like it needs to be acknowledged.
00:25:50.799 --> 00:25:51.680
And that's sort of the thing.
00:25:51.759 --> 00:25:54.319
We there's uh we'll come back to you at Labor Day.
00:25:55.839 --> 00:26:01.039
Celebrate labor, celebrate the great labor tradition and the wobblies.
00:26:02.559 --> 00:26:09.920
Uh that email address again colddarkmiserable pod at gmail.com.
00:26:10.880 --> 00:26:13.119
You can check us on all the platforms.
00:26:13.200 --> 00:26:13.759
We're on YouTube.
00:26:14.079 --> 00:26:16.559
Check out some of our YouTube shorts with more on the way.
00:26:17.119 --> 00:26:19.759
Give us our Fourth of July gift of a five-star rating.
00:26:20.000 --> 00:26:20.160
Yep.
00:26:20.720 --> 00:26:22.960
July 4th, five stars.
00:26:23.279 --> 00:26:24.000
Fourth, five.
00:26:24.079 --> 00:26:25.599
Not fifth, four stars.
00:26:26.240 --> 00:26:27.759
Fourth, five stars.
00:26:30.400 --> 00:26:49.599
So at my workplace where I'll be on the fourth of July, we had uh within the last couple months uh a performance where the the title of the show was was the name of two uh two lovers, and it was uh one of the one of them was Jack, uh, and then it was the ladies.
00:26:49.839 --> 00:26:51.359
Well, I'll just say it was Jack and Louise.
00:26:51.440 --> 00:26:58.720
And so I spent the whole run of this show just in my head being like, little ditty about Jack and Louise.
00:26:59.200 --> 00:27:03.200
And and you know, English people under 30 were like, What why do you keep singing that?
00:27:03.279 --> 00:27:06.240
And I was like, hold on, let me, you don't know, you don't know, let me play this for you.
00:27:06.400 --> 00:27:14.240
And it and I learned that English people under 30 have no idea who John Mellencamp is.
00:27:14.640 --> 00:27:32.000
And this was pretty, pretty painful for me as an American immigrant, that like John Mellencamp is being is being lost to history to uh uh you know, to non to non-Americans, even though he's pretty American coded is Mellenkamp.
00:27:33.359 --> 00:27:55.279
So I thought to really cement what we're doing here, being independent from America, but also keeping the American spirit, not the cigarette, alive, that I would attribute to Mellencamp with a new theme song for our podcast.
00:27:55.599 --> 00:27:56.720
All right, all right.
00:27:57.279 --> 00:27:57.920
Let's hear it.
00:27:58.319 --> 00:27:59.119
Are you ready?
00:27:59.599 --> 00:28:00.240
I think so.
00:28:00.400 --> 00:28:01.200
Okay, great.
00:28:01.920 --> 00:28:09.519
Beow down down, bow down, bow down, down, down, down, down.
00:28:10.000 --> 00:28:16.720
There's an orange man in a white house crumbling down his neighbor.
00:28:18.480 --> 00:28:22.880
He's got a wrestling ring plunked down in the front yard.
00:28:23.119 --> 00:28:24.079
Uh update.
00:28:24.319 --> 00:28:28.880
He's got a chain link fence round a toxic duck pond.
00:28:29.039 --> 00:28:32.640
His cronies think they got it so good.
00:28:34.480 --> 00:28:38.640
And we're two old dads with a podcast.
00:28:39.200 --> 00:28:42.079
We met at a college radio station.
00:28:42.799 --> 00:28:51.119
We got visa tales, I got cheesy rhymes for immigrants to this cold, dark, miserable nation.
00:28:52.480 --> 00:28:59.599
See they told us when we were younger, anyone can grow up to be president.
00:29:00.880 --> 00:29:07.279
But a narcissistic, racist, rapist, comman, clown probably wasn't worth they meant.
00:29:08.480 --> 00:29:12.559
So we ain't in America for 250.
00:29:12.960 --> 00:29:14.799
No, we ain't in America.
00:29:15.119 --> 00:29:20.880
We don't have to see daily all the hate in America for rationality.
00:29:21.759 --> 00:29:22.319
Yeah.
00:29:23.200 --> 00:29:26.400
Non-detached houses for Mike and me.
00:29:27.119 --> 00:29:30.559
Fourth of July in the UK for a Mike and me.
00:29:31.119 --> 00:29:32.079
Oh yeah.
00:29:34.319 --> 00:29:35.359
Ain't in America.
