Regulating Your Nervous System for Inner Peace

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I will not be afraid of the shadows in the dark.
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They will lead the way to the hidden pathways of the heart and that secret place that is where I find my start.
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Welcome to the Shadow and the Light podcast with internationally renowned meditation teacher David G.
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And heart healer and psychotherapist Elizabeth Winkler, as we guide you through our unique fusion of ancient wisdom and modern psychology.
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Get ready to awaken your true essence.
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Heal your wounds and transform your shadow into in tune.
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Hi, david G.
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Oh, hello there, elizabeth.
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So there's an amazing theme that I really want to talk about.
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I've been thinking about it, I've been percolating about it.
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It's something I teach every single day.
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It's something that I teach all my teachers to teach every single day, or certainly embody every single day, and it's this concept of regulating your nervous system.
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It's actually something that, if we can get better at it, it's going to bring us joy in every moment.
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It's going to bring us all these sweet moments where we otherwise would be bringing some kind of emotional charge to the situation.
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And when we have that emotional charge that we're bringing to the situation, these are like mini flickers of emotional fight-flight.
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Now you understand what fight-flight is.
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It's this physiological self-preservation mechanism.
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Go back 10,000 years.
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You're walking through the jungle, you hear a twig snap and in that moment your autonomic nervous system takes control of your entire physiology and says something threatening is here, a threat to the physiology, and in that moment, in under five seconds, you're going to prepare to either fight the threat or run away from it.
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This is pretty common and it's been going on for over 10,000 years.
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We are all hardwired with this self-preservation mechanism, all of us, every single being on the planet, and most mammals as well, and you can even look at lizards with their reptilian brain, and they are also responding to this same fight-flight threat.
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But it's triggered because you sense a mortal threat to the physiology.
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Well, fast forward 10,000 years not a lot of saber-toothed tigers running around in our neighborhoods.
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But we have evolved.
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We are so magnificent that we evolved to take fight-flight on a physiological level into fight-flight on an emotional level.
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It's emotional fight-flight.
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So now I don't have to sense a threat to my physiology, but I take something personally that you said and it sparks the exact same hormones and chemicals inside of me.
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So in physical fight-flight, the first thing that happens is you start to perspire, and we know this Once.
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The last time your life was threatened if someone ever cut you off while you were driving at a high speed, you probably felt like your life was going to end in that moment and the first thing that we do is perspire.
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Why?
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It's not to make you more slippery so you can escape the saber-toothed tiger.
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But actually we start to perspire because our mind, body, our autonomic nervous system knows we're going to overheat, because we're going to fight this threat or run away from it, and so we need to start cooling off before we even start overheating.
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That's number one.
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Number two, and this is a very, very key aspect here we start to breathe more shallowly and more rapidly because your nervous system knows that you're going to need to surge all these hormones and chemicals into your body, and if you're not breathing more rapidly, then your blood's not going to pulse more.
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So you start breathing more shallowly and more rapidly, your heart starts beating faster and that's the delivery system for all the hormones and chemicals Very, very powerful.
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And then your autonomic nervous system says let's shut down everything that's not essential right now.
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Just shut it down.
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Shut down your sex hormones.
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You don't need to be thinking about procreation right now.
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Shut down your growth hormones.
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You don't need to be thinking about cellular development and getting harder nails and more lustrous hair.
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Shut it down.
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Shut down your immune system, because you could be dead in five minutes, so we don't really need to be fighting germs here.
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And let's shut down your gastrointestinal system.
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Let's just shut down your stomach, because you don't need to be digesting now.
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If we can shut down everything that's not core to survival, all the non-essential stuff, you can really elevate your survival mechanisms.
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Once all that stuff is suppressed, adrenaline, cortisol, glucagon which is like five Snickers bars suddenly surges into your system.
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So that's a pretty powerful experience to be having.
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And then oh, oh, this is the coolest thing you start clotting.
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You haven't even yet started to bleed, you haven.
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This is the coolest thing you start clotting.
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You haven't even yet started to bleed, you haven't gotten cut yet, but you start clotting.
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The hard parts of your blood, your platelets, that flows through your entire body suddenly becomes plump and sticky, because that's how we clot naturally.
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So you haven't even been cut, but you're starting to clot.
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So fast forward to now.
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You're not in mortal danger, but someone commented on your shoes.
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You're not in mortal danger.
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But someone said really, are you going to eat that?
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You're not in mortal danger.
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But someone commented on your outfit or on your religion, or on your belief system, or on your music.
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We can go on and on with all the things that we're so sensitive about, and so we have evolved into this emotional fight-flight.
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The same, exact fight-flight mechanism happens inside of us.
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The exact same hormones and chemicals surge into us.
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The exact same suppression occurs.
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How many times do you think that you can make your platelets plump and sticky before you feel the results of that?
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How many times do you think you can shut down your immune system before you start to feel the results of that?
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How many times do you think that you can surge sugar into your bloodstream before you start to feel the results of that?
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Every time your needs are not met over the course of the day, or anytime someone's poking or triggering you and you take it personally.
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This stuff is happening.
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This is why people get diagnosed with stuff we could say it's self-created, it's certainly co-created, and the solution to that and we would say that these people have dysregulated nervous systems.
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We would say that these people have dysregulated nervous systems.
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So if we can figure out how to regulate, we're going to live more healthy lives.
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We won't be making our blood plump and sticky or shutting down our immune system or any of these things, and so we have an opportunity to make better choices.
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Why would we make better choices?
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It's so clear.
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If I come into a moment and I can speak calmly, with reflectiveness, not with emotional charge and not with a chip on my shoulder, I'm probably going to convey information in a better way.
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It might be received then in a better way and there's a higher likelihood I'll get my needs met and on top of that, there's a higher likelihood I won't get spun out or upset.
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So regulating your nervous system is probably the most important thing that we could do on the planet.
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What do you think?
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Totally agree.
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When I was learning about this, when I was doing my graduate work in psychology, we were learning about the autonomic and then the parasympathetic, and what I always think of with the parasympathetic is a parachute.
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That was a visual they gave us.
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Think of it like a parachute because it's slowing.
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I know it's the best, it's the best visual.
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So your parasympathetic is activated.
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When you do meditation you do a long, slow, deep breath or an extension of your exhale.
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I studied heart math and did some training on it for trauma work and one of their teachings was the extension of the exhale.
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So a lot of people will get stressed by having to count their breath, how long the inhale is and how long the exhale.
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So you don't have to do that, that's an option.
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But just extending the exhale a little bit longer, letting it lengthen, what does that do?
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That activates the vagus nerve and the vagus nerve is what gets you out of the amygdala, which is where we go into fight or flight, that whole reptilian brain right.
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So then we have greater access to all of us and our ability to make wiser choices and to be in the present moment and to connect to our wisdom.
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I'm extending that parachute visual to everyone to remember that that's how we slow down, how we slow down, how we activate our nervous system through those different practices.
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Yeah, it's great, and within it is the sympathetic and the parasympathetic.
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So the sympathetic is going to be the thing that says you need to breathe more quickly, you need to start clotting, you need to do all that stuff.
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And the parasympathetic, that's so great, it's the parachute coming down to like ah.
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Yeah, the exhale.
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Just to calm everything down and make it all so perfect.
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So I love this.
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I love it for so many different reasons, but we are happier beings if we control this.
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So not just because you're not going to have a heart attack, not just because you're not going to be diagnosed with something.
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There's even deeper, more meaningful aspects to this, and it's that you will perceive things and show up for things at a deeper, more expanded level, because now I'm not showing up bringing some past-laden grievance, now I'm not showing up bringing some emotional charge right, I'm showing up fully present, and so I'm not informing this moment with stuff that the person I'm interacting with has no idea what I'm even talking about.
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Right Projecting, assuming filling in the blanks.
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Right, because we can show up for things.
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And before the person's even opened their mouth, we're like how dare you?
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And they're like what?
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It doesn't matter even what happens.
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That's the fractal We've created, a powerful fractal of anger, of antagonism, of irritation.
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The person's in a defensive mode and we're in aggressive mode.
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It's like what's the best that can happen out of that?
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So you said something earlier and I was gonna bring it in.
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I've thought maybe it would be for later, but you talked about a chip on your shoulder.
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So let's all just think about that.
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We can all think of somebody that has a chip on their shoulder.
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It's so funny.
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I remember so long ago I think I was in my mid twenties I was in a relationship and I was doing some healing work on a retreat with my boyfriend at the time and we did a lot of breath work on this healing thing and the healer teacher, leader, kept saying to my boyfriend there's the chip, the chip he kept whenever, whenever he would act in his defensive.
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He's like leader kept saying to my boyfriend there's the chip, the chip he kept whenever he would act in his defensive.
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He's like hey, your chip.
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So he would call it out like lovingly you know the chip's here, and so it was a way to bring awareness.
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So I think that we could all use that.
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When is the chip present on your shoulder?
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And what is that chip on your shoulder about?
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Is that something you're still carrying in?
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You've got this big bag of coal like Santa Claus, but not the greatest one, right, all the coal, and you're just holding on to it, and now you're carrying it into all your experiences.
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It's just like canoes.
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Yeah, what is this chip?
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What's this chip that you're carrying?
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What chip do you have on your shoulder?
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Because it's easy for all of us to think of someone in our lives that does that.
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It's easy to do that and maybe you'll learn something about yourself when you do that.
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But being able to again look at yourself and look at when.
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Am I doing that?
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Not as a punishment, not as a judgment, but like to teach, to learn, to grow.
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Yeah Well, this concept of past laden grievances.
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They can just sit inside of us like little time bombs and it's like you wronged me five years ago in a conversation that I've never let go of, and then the person probably has forgotten the conversation, but I'm going to hold on to that.
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You're poisoning yourself.
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Poisoning yourself.
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You're poisoning yourself absolutely and I'm holding on to that through the winter and I'm holding on to it through the summer months and I'm holding on.
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Sometimes it rears its ugly head, but oftentimes it's not.
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But push my button.
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In a certain way.
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That's really the sunscar, that's the etching in there.
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It's at the cellular level.
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It in there, it's at the cellular level, it's deep, but this is the thing it will never be healed if you don't heal it within yourself.
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Because you're doing it, you're doing it.
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You're thinking that thought which is making you feel a particular way, not a good way.
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You're continuing to think that thought.
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I'm not saying that there's no validity to what you went through and the pain that you endured.
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That is not what I'm saying.
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I want you to be a liberator of your own freedom, and there are so many ways in which we are keeping ourselves stuck in that cell and so, until you think that it exists in that person saying they're sorry, sure, that can be a piece of it, but that's not the complete freedom, the freedom.
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Well, plus, that person said those words and then maybe forgot about them two days later.
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Here you are, five years or 25 years later.
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You have held onto them.
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Where attention goes, energy flows.
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You have created such a massive entity of what this thing is.
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It started as a speck and now it's this giant fireball or, as you said, bag of coal or whatever, that steamer trunk of grievances pick.
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Whatever it is.
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It's this type of attachment and loyalty to your outrage.
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Well, it's part of your identity.
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At this point it's become part of your identity and what the world maybe has done to you, or what you want people to understand about you, or whatever fairness, righteousness this can go in a lot of different directions, but if we can, in the moment, have these proactive, in the moment tools.
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I call them stress hacks, but they're also autonomic nervous system hacks.
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They are tools to help us regulate our nervous system.
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So one of my favorites I've put myself out there as like oh, if you're feeling anxious, come to me, I can help you with that.
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Oh, you're feeling stressed out, come to me, I can help you with that.
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Not using you know the mastery techniques that you do, but using basic.
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Oh, come on.
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You have many mastery techniques.
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You have a teacher training called the Masters of Wisdom.
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Okay, okay, I won't protest that, okay.
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So here's like a cool thing, I call it fill her up, top it off.
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All right, fill her up, top it off.
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We breathe in through our nose.
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You don't have to do it yet.
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I'll guide us through it when we're doing it.
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But I'll just explain it here.
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We breathe in through our nose, but I'll just explain it here.
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We breathe in through our nose about three quarters, fill our lungs, and then we fill it again three quarters and you're saying, wait, but your lungs only hold a hundred percent.
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Yep, we go to like 150% again and then out through the mouth.
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So it's fill her up, then top it off and I know in California you're not allowed to top off your tank at the gas station, but here this is a very healthy thing for you to do Fill your lungs and then top it off and then release it.
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So we'll do it together In through the nose, in through the nose again and then out.
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One, two, three.
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Let's do it One more time and one more time.
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What we did was send a message to our sinoatrial node.
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It's our heart's little mini pacemaker inside there, speaking to our brain instantly, saying all is safe here.
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No saber tooth tigers, no one mean here All those people who hurt you in the past.
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They're gone.
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They're not here right now.
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You are safe.
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So it's like a vagus nerve reset, it's a brain reset, it's a heart reset, it's a lung reset.
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You feel more relaxed, feel less angry.
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I know you're never angry.
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I'm more present.
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I'm never angry, not with me.
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Sure, not with me.
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Every time I hang out with Elizabeth, she's only joyful.
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I've never seen her angry.
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We have all of the continuum of humanity.
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I'm sure it's never been exposed to me.
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When I don't eat.
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Oh, okay, that's working now.
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That'll activate.
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I can get angry, yeah, without food.
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Yeah, angry.
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So that's just one really powerful in the moment stress hack, you like that.
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Yeah, I love it.
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Yeah, fill her up, tap it off.
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I'm sure it has a better name someplace, but that's why I like it.
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It's the sinoatrial node, that little teeny thing that says, oh, no need to worry.
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If someone's feeling the chip on the shoulder, will that help?
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Yeah, okay, so that's your hack.
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That's your hack when you feel you've got a chip on your shoulder.
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Well, I think everyone's got a chip on their shoulder.
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Not all the time, I think in our political environment.
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Not all the time, I think in our political environment there's a lot of people carrying chips.
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No, no, no.
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I'm just saying in this moment we're not feeling it.
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I'm saying, when the person is feeling like that's happening, that that would be the thing to go to.
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Oh, yes, that's what I'm saying.
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Yes, just as you pull out the machete.
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that's when you go.
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Oh, my goodness, because you know that, my goodness.
00:18:34.803 --> 00:18:35.943
Because you know that's happening.
00:18:35.943 --> 00:18:38.567
So, yes, regulating our nervous system.
00:18:38.567 --> 00:18:39.907
So what's it really mean?
00:18:39.907 --> 00:18:40.449
What are we doing?
00:18:40.449 --> 00:18:54.670
We're not like stopping fight flight, we're not just parachuting into that, but we're creating the foundation for a parachuted life.
00:18:54.670 --> 00:18:55.173
That's really what it is.
00:18:55.173 --> 00:19:26.525
So one of the biggest takeaways for me from regulating the nervous system which is why I'm a fan of trackers whether that's a whoop or a Fitbit or an Apple Watch or an Oura Ring or a Garmin you know there's so many different types of trackers I'm really a fan of this because suddenly, if you're feeling anxious, suddenly you're feeling stressed out, suddenly you're feeling we would call it dysregulated, you're angry about this and you're feeling hurt about that and you're just allowing your emotions to really overtake your clarity.
00:19:27.195 --> 00:19:46.343
The only way we can take our clarity back in the moment, obviously, number one we introduce a pattern, interrupt a break in the action, right A time in, as the Boston Buddha Andy Kelly termed it Actually, he termed it this way, like 12 years ago, and every time I give him credit for it, he goes.
00:19:46.343 --> 00:19:47.586
I don't even remember saying that.
00:19:47.586 --> 00:19:53.106
So, yes, because a lot of people feel, oh, meditation is taking a time out.
00:19:53.106 --> 00:19:56.741
It's like, no, we're going in, we're not leaving anything.
00:19:56.741 --> 00:19:58.968
We're going even deeper into ourselves.
00:19:58.968 --> 00:20:02.020
So having these pattern interrupts varies.
00:20:02.020 --> 00:20:05.195
Here's another one that I've shared a whole bunch of times.
00:20:05.195 --> 00:20:12.022
I really started doing this with members of the military because I needed to come up with some techniques that I didn't want to call meditation.
00:20:12.022 --> 00:20:17.300
So think of something that's been bothering you or irritating you just for the past couple of days.
00:20:17.300 --> 00:20:18.083
Don't go too deep.
00:20:18.083 --> 00:20:18.964
This is not therapy.
00:20:19.546 --> 00:20:20.468
Yes, it is, it's therapy.
00:20:20.468 --> 00:20:25.123
We're here to do therapy, aren't we so perfect?
00:20:25.123 --> 00:20:25.423
So?
00:20:25.483 --> 00:20:26.807
perfect, all right.
00:20:26.807 --> 00:20:27.737
So think of something.
00:20:27.737 --> 00:20:29.461
Someone said they were going to do something.
00:20:29.461 --> 00:20:29.922
They didn't.
00:20:29.922 --> 00:20:31.965
Something was supposed to happen or unfold a certain way.
00:20:31.965 --> 00:20:41.362
It didn't work that way, even if there's a person that you can see their face in your mind's eye just like, oh yeah, it's them who did that thing.
00:20:41.362 --> 00:20:48.675
And now close your eyes and, through your nose, take a long, slow, deep breath in and watch that breath as it goes down when it gets to your belly.
00:20:48.675 --> 00:20:49.836
Hold it there as it goes down when it gets to your belly.
00:20:49.836 --> 00:20:55.240
Hold it there, keep holding it there, keep watching it, keep witnessing, keep observing it as it sits in your belly.
00:20:55.240 --> 00:21:04.008
And now release that breath, watch it move up your chest, through your throat, out through your nose or mouth, keep exhaling, watch that breath, witness the breath.
00:21:04.008 --> 00:21:08.271
Keep exhaling, watch the breath as it dissipates into the ether.
00:21:08.271 --> 00:21:15.176
And now breathe normally and open your eyes.
00:21:15.196 --> 00:21:25.836
And if you were playing along, you were not thinking about that thing that I just asked you to think about if you were playing along.
00:21:25.836 --> 00:21:26.458
So we proved three things.
00:21:26.458 --> 00:21:28.402
Number one we proved we can direct our attention, our thoughts, anywhere we want to.
00:21:28.402 --> 00:21:28.923
We just did it.
00:21:28.923 --> 00:21:30.767
And you may be sitting.
00:21:30.767 --> 00:21:33.797
Damn, I wasn't thinking about that thing for 16 seconds.
00:21:33.797 --> 00:21:37.686
That's amazing, because you were not in the past and you were not in the future.
00:21:37.686 --> 00:21:38.798
You were fully present.
00:21:38.798 --> 00:21:48.523
Now, I'm sorry if I brought it up, because now you are thinking about it and that's on me, my bad, but the fact is for those 16 seconds you weren't.
00:21:48.523 --> 00:21:57.623
So we also proved we can create a pattern, interrupt inside of us anytime we want, simply by closing your eyes and watching your breath.
00:21:58.474 --> 00:22:04.127
And the third thing that we revealed here it's a secret of meditation the object of attention.
00:22:04.127 --> 00:22:13.286
Every meditation has to have an object of attention, and so this object of attention was breathing and watching the breath.
00:22:13.286 --> 00:22:17.542
That's why this is a little different than the concept of box breathing, which is done.
00:22:17.542 --> 00:22:23.001
Navy SEALs popularize that five in, five hold, five out, five hold.
00:22:23.001 --> 00:22:34.762
But that's to slow your heart rate when you can watch it while you're doing it not just breathe it but watch it, which is what we did with the 16 seconds.
00:22:34.762 --> 00:22:37.845
Then you really come into the present moment.
00:22:37.845 --> 00:22:42.644
So we accomplished two things we lowered our heart rate and we got present.
00:22:42.644 --> 00:22:44.780
How'd that feel, elizabeth?
00:22:45.194 --> 00:22:46.661
Great Love it.
00:22:47.182 --> 00:22:47.483
It's great.
00:22:47.483 --> 00:22:58.248
So there are so many different ways that we can regulate our nervous system, but first we have to remember or find out that we are dysregulated in that moment.
00:22:58.248 --> 00:23:03.707
So we need like a robot that says chip, chip, chip, chip, chip.
00:23:04.855 --> 00:23:05.760
They're on their way.
00:23:05.760 --> 00:23:08.395
You can program them to do whatever you want Right Chat.
00:23:08.435 --> 00:23:14.682
Gpt meets Elon's robots and soon they'll be like my companion always taps me on the shoulder.
00:23:14.761 --> 00:23:18.201
It's time to meditate Right, exactly, Notice your feet.
00:23:18.515 --> 00:23:29.144
So we don't have those yet, most of us don't have those yet, but we all do have some kind of phone that we can put a reminder on there or some type of alert just to go off.
00:23:29.144 --> 00:23:33.678
And what I would recommend is really make it your favorite song or something that you love.
00:23:33.678 --> 00:23:34.721
Don't make it.
00:23:34.721 --> 00:23:37.768
That's not the alert you want to be getting.
00:23:37.768 --> 00:23:38.696
You pick it.
00:23:38.696 --> 00:23:47.118
Whatever your favorite song is that you want to be like ah yes, the call to meditate, and we're just talking about 16 seconds.
00:23:47.118 --> 00:23:51.795
We're just doing three of those breaths of fill her up, tap it off.
00:23:51.795 --> 00:23:55.018
There's one other technique that I will share.
00:23:55.018 --> 00:24:01.584
Elizabeth has talked about these techniques where you anchor yourself when you're driving.
00:24:01.723 --> 00:24:05.586
As a therapist, she is trauma-informed in all these different ways.
00:24:05.586 --> 00:24:13.377
When I'm teaching someone or training someone in trauma-informed meditation, I always talk about this Always give people options.
00:24:13.377 --> 00:24:18.518
That's like the number one thing that you could teach people who have experienced any type of trauma.
00:24:18.518 --> 00:24:19.559
Give them options.
00:24:19.559 --> 00:24:20.603
That's number one.
00:24:20.603 --> 00:24:26.125
I'm not speaking as a therapist, I'm speaking as someone sitting in a room with the greatest therapist of all time.
00:24:26.125 --> 00:24:31.241
So that's an important thing Always give options.
00:24:31.923 --> 00:24:37.519
Whenever you're guiding someone in a trauma-informed meditation, there's four areas that we want to direct their attention.
00:24:37.519 --> 00:24:39.521
So we could certainly do this to ourself.
00:24:39.521 --> 00:24:47.046
So if we're sitting in a room, the first thing we do is look around the room and go oh, I'm in this room and maybe we could find something that makes us smile.
00:24:47.046 --> 00:25:00.076
I'm in my favorite place, I have my favorite mug, I have my favorite Elizabeth Winkler lemon sticker, I have some really beautiful photos of people I like, or paintings or artwork or something along those lines.
00:25:00.076 --> 00:25:11.819
Then you close your eyes and you drift your attention to your feet and notice your feet firmly on the ground and you can pay attention and always be saying to yourself I'm safe here, this is pretty good, I'm safe.
00:25:12.240 --> 00:25:13.944
Then notice your tush on a seat.
00:25:13.944 --> 00:25:17.599
Could be a couch, could be a chair, could be the floor, whatever that looks like.
00:25:17.599 --> 00:25:19.384
Oh, I am supported here.
00:25:19.384 --> 00:25:22.839
And then maybe there's even something against your back as well.
00:25:22.839 --> 00:25:24.724
Not every seat has that.
00:25:24.724 --> 00:25:28.759
If you're on a stool or a cushion or an ottoman, you wouldn't have a backrest.
00:25:28.759 --> 00:25:51.882
But if you do have a backrest, then say to yourself I'm really supported here, so the room is safe, my feet are grounded, my tush is supported, my back is supported and now I could go into meditation or now I can like flow through something where being very, very sensitive to potential traumas that me or anyone else might have.
00:25:52.515 --> 00:25:59.961
But I've just given myself four reasons to feel safe and to feel good about closing my eyes and again having options.
00:25:59.961 --> 00:26:06.944
So maybe you don't tell the person to close their eyes, maybe soft gaze, it's just a soft gaze, not fully closed.
00:26:06.944 --> 00:26:20.910
So these are the types of things that can really really help and be so powerful, and so that's why I recommend to people whether you're driving, listening to the Shadow in the Light podcast, or whether you're walking, you could always just squint your eyes a little bit soft gaze.
00:26:20.910 --> 00:26:23.454
Actually, don't do that with driving.
00:26:23.454 --> 00:26:35.518
When I was on Hay House Radio a bunch of years ago, there was this woman who called up the radio show because she had just plowed into a police car because she was listening to my meditation.
00:26:35.518 --> 00:26:45.026
So don't close your eyes or even soft gaze Any deeper insights, because this is your favorite topic regulating the nervous system.
00:26:47.076 --> 00:26:48.017
My absolute favorite.
00:26:48.017 --> 00:26:57.627
No, I love everything you said In the animal kingdom, when animals like ducks, when they fight or any animal really.
00:26:57.627 --> 00:27:03.021
But people talk about this a lot, how they shake it off and that we don't do that.
00:27:03.021 --> 00:27:13.500
So, whether you're having a little bickering with someone you know in traffic, which happens a lot, and then you have that, what is it?
00:27:13.500 --> 00:27:18.919
Ojas, ojas or Ama, ama, that's the Ama right.
00:27:18.919 --> 00:27:21.905
That was in our episode on Ayurveda.
00:27:22.487 --> 00:27:22.667
Yeah.
00:27:23.015 --> 00:27:25.326
Right, right, okay, ojas and Ama.
00:27:25.326 --> 00:27:28.336
So you yell at someone on the road and then I think that was season four.
00:27:28.356 --> 00:27:29.740
I think that's the season.
00:27:30.342 --> 00:27:41.019
So, so we have that Alma, and now I'm I'm driving around with all this energy because I just yelled at someone doesn't feel very good, we don't shake it off.
00:27:41.019 --> 00:27:47.075
So moving your body, also moving your body, doing, you know, energy work.
00:27:47.075 --> 00:27:51.916
I mean working with, like sound bath bells, frequency.
00:27:51.916 --> 00:27:57.097
There's so many ways that we can help our frequency.
00:27:57.097 --> 00:28:00.338
You know you always say the highest vibration always wins.
00:28:00.338 --> 00:28:01.920
So who are you hanging out with?
00:28:01.920 --> 00:28:03.945
Who are the people you're hanging out with?
00:28:03.945 --> 00:28:05.547
What's the environment like that you're in?
00:28:05.961 --> 00:28:12.928
Maybe you need to cleanse your environment a little bit, whether that's with what you're eating, but also your surroundings.
00:28:12.928 --> 00:28:15.368
You were talking about looking at pictures.
00:28:15.368 --> 00:28:18.288
I recently just totally cleaned out my garage.
00:28:18.288 --> 00:28:20.888
I spent like 10 hours cleaning out my garage.
00:28:20.888 --> 00:28:22.444
That felt so incredible.
00:28:22.444 --> 00:28:23.548
I moved some things around.
00:28:23.548 --> 00:28:25.365
I moved some things around.
00:28:25.365 --> 00:28:29.190
It was so liberating and the whole space feels different.
00:28:29.190 --> 00:28:40.646
Not that it wasn't great before, but like just shifting energy can shift how you feel and what you see and how you experience your bedroom, your home, and then the people you hang out with.
00:28:40.646 --> 00:28:48.384
You talk about this all the time, Like who you hang out with or who's in your front row, right, and all of the people in your front row.
00:28:48.384 --> 00:28:56.849
Are they cheering you on or are they judging you right and maybe they don't belong in the front row?
00:28:56.849 --> 00:29:01.332
Maybe there's people in the back that are like David G, I love you.
00:29:01.332 --> 00:29:03.005
Bring them forward.
00:29:03.005 --> 00:29:04.008
Bring them forward.
00:29:04.160 --> 00:29:07.470
You don't have to kick those people out of the theater, but you definitely have to move them back a few rows.
00:29:07.740 --> 00:29:15.661
Right, and then one thing I love that you say about this is all those people that are cheering you on in your front row, are you in their front row?
00:29:15.661 --> 00:29:30.143
That's something I really like to look at as well, because we're not always giving and receiving and everything is about that flow, so that's another way I'm looking at this of like, just what are some things that we can?
00:29:30.163 --> 00:29:30.904
do like actively today.
00:29:30.904 --> 00:29:36.304
Well, you touched on a bunch of these, and spending time in nature is so important because we don't.
00:29:36.304 --> 00:29:50.326
We spend time in front of our laptops, at our desks or in our cars, especially in LA or in a driving city, and so spending time outside watching the sunset, just getting up really, really early.
00:29:50.326 --> 00:29:56.144
Peaches and I we're out before 6 am every morning and it feels great.
00:29:56.144 --> 00:30:02.365
It's so quiet, there's nobody else out except a couple of other early dog walkers, and we don't even speak.
00:30:02.365 --> 00:30:07.909
We know we nod to each other as we pass, but this is like our sacred quiet time.
00:30:09.141 --> 00:30:23.814
Our lives are filled with so much activity and if you're a caregiver, you're either a caregiver or you're going to become a caregiver at some point, because we are the sandwich generation, taking care of our kids and taking care of our parents.
00:30:23.814 --> 00:30:27.085
We never thought we'd be taking care of our parents and here it is.
00:30:27.085 --> 00:30:52.515
This is the age, and so having that level of attention and being in service and nourishing someone else, whether they're your kid or whether they're your parent, is exhausting, and that level of attention is going to dysregulate your nervous system because it's going to be touching you at all these different times of the day.
00:30:52.515 --> 00:30:54.885
Caregiving is just one component.
00:30:54.885 --> 00:30:57.432
That does it People who watch the news a lot.
00:30:57.432 --> 00:30:58.460
That's another component.
00:30:58.460 --> 00:31:03.490
There's nothing been new on the news for about 50 years, other than they made it color.
00:31:04.212 --> 00:31:06.026
Right, I mean, this is speaking to burnout.
00:31:06.026 --> 00:31:10.368
Yeah, it makes me think so much of COVID and like how burnt out at least.
00:31:10.368 --> 00:31:11.673
Okay, I'm a mental health professional.
00:31:11.673 --> 00:31:17.112
Talk about working a lot and spending a lot of time in front of it, but we all were, everybody was.
00:31:17.112 --> 00:31:30.449
And one thing I just recently did so I like to run outside in nature, spend a lot of time doing that, but I was only doing that for my exercise which I love, but I really need to be doing other things.
00:31:30.411 --> 00:31:31.211
You know what I was doing for my exercise?
00:31:31.211 --> 00:31:32.622
I was listening to you tell me that you were running.
00:31:32.622 --> 00:31:35.251
That was my exercise.
00:31:35.251 --> 00:31:38.122
My ears got such a great workout listening to that.
00:31:38.122 --> 00:31:43.203
And you even told me that story where you were running and you passed like a bus stop and there was a Bhagavad Gita oh yeah.
00:31:43.444 --> 00:31:44.606
Yeah, that's right.
00:31:44.647 --> 00:31:45.650
What are the odds of a?
00:31:46.371 --> 00:31:53.644
Of the one, the translation, the orange one, this one, that one, this one, yeah, the one it's like not that common AC Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada.
00:31:53.683 --> 00:31:55.147
Yeah, yeah, that's his translation.
00:31:55.288 --> 00:31:56.611
Exactly so anyway, I.
00:31:57.000 --> 00:32:00.104
So I got such a deep workout during your runs.
00:32:00.104 --> 00:32:00.984
Thank, you.
00:32:01.066 --> 00:32:05.270
But I just made a major change, started doing yoga.
00:32:05.270 --> 00:32:12.984
Now when I look at yoga, I'm like thinking 90 minute class, that's what I always did, can't do it, don't have the time.
00:32:12.984 --> 00:32:16.317
I mean, okay, I shouldn't say I don't have the time, I haven't made the time, so what I've, I've found a way to make it work.
00:32:16.317 --> 00:32:23.388
So I've been just doing 30 minutes and doing at home and it's been incredible.
00:32:23.388 --> 00:32:25.511
And talk about an emotional release.
00:32:25.511 --> 00:32:29.143
You know I've been doing I'll do like a lot of hip release.
00:32:29.163 --> 00:32:39.275
I have a lot of hip issues from being a ballet dancer for many years, so that just what that brings into brings you into your body in a new way.
00:32:39.275 --> 00:32:43.446
That has brought more balance into my body and into my life and it's felt very liberating.
00:32:43.446 --> 00:32:46.015
People talk about how you create a new habit just do it for five minutes and I think it's felt very liberating.
00:32:46.015 --> 00:32:50.807
People talk about how you create a new habit just do it for five minutes and I think it's in Atomic Habits.
00:32:50.807 --> 00:33:10.102
He's like go to the gym for five minutes a day, every day, which sounds insane because it's like takes 15 minutes to drive to the gym, right, but like just do that at home for five minutes, do something, and I literally started to do that with yoga and some other things and it feels so good and then you just want to keep doing it.
00:33:10.282 --> 00:33:12.809
It's part of my morning practice too, and I don't do a half hour.
00:33:12.809 --> 00:33:21.922
I've done 20 minutes right after my meditation for the last 15 years, so that has just allowed me to be so much more flexible.
00:33:21.922 --> 00:33:24.946
So what other techniques can we do out there?
00:33:24.946 --> 00:33:31.909
So, obviously, practicing yoga, spending time in nature, taking walks Taking walks is really, really underrated.
00:33:31.909 --> 00:33:38.650
It's so great for your back If you sit all day long or even for just a few hours a day.
00:33:38.650 --> 00:33:45.808
Sitting is the worst thing in the world for your back, and walking is the best thing in the world for your back, and it doesn't have to be power walking, just walking.
00:33:45.808 --> 00:33:52.932
This is in addition to having a meditation practice that starts your day and a meditation practice that bookends your day.
00:33:52.932 --> 00:33:58.832
One in the afternoon, of course, of course, but, and and no buts.
00:33:58.832 --> 00:33:59.874
I think that was season three.
00:34:00.740 --> 00:34:01.742
Maybe season one.
00:34:02.063 --> 00:34:02.704
Oh, it might've been.
00:34:02.704 --> 00:34:03.286
It's a critical teaching.
00:34:03.306 --> 00:34:03.727
She knows season two.
00:34:03.727 --> 00:34:05.310
It was two Francesca's telling us oh two, it's a critical teaching.
00:34:05.310 --> 00:34:06.993
She knows season two.
00:34:07.295 --> 00:34:11.132
It was two Francesca's telling us, oh it's stop shooting all over yourself.
00:34:11.132 --> 00:34:12.139
Stop shooting all over yourself.
00:34:12.139 --> 00:34:12.460
It's the.
00:34:12.460 --> 00:34:13.746
Stop shooting all over yourself.
00:34:13.746 --> 00:34:15.103
All my language hacks.
00:34:15.204 --> 00:34:17.231
Yeah, get out of victim.
00:34:17.739 --> 00:34:29.643
So one of the ways that I also like to do this and since you have recently reengaged your yoga practice is with nadi Shodhana alternate nostril breathing.
00:34:29.643 --> 00:34:30.626
So everyone's going to do it.
00:34:30.626 --> 00:34:36.588
We're going to ask even Matteo, our engineer on the board here, and Francesca, who's our special guest in studio today.
00:34:36.588 --> 00:34:38.092
We're going to do Nadi Shodhana.
00:34:38.092 --> 00:34:53.391
So, essentially, what you do with Nadi Shodhana alternate nostril, you breathe in through one nostril, then you close it, then you breathe out through the alternate nostril and then you breathe back in through that alternate nostril, then you close it and then you breathe out.
00:34:53.391 --> 00:34:58.391
So we'll just do like a couple of rounds here, but this is so, so powerful Elizabeth.
00:34:58.639 --> 00:35:00.610
I have a question Does it matter?
00:35:00.610 --> 00:35:05.889
It probably doesn't, but I'm just curious because you're the expert Does it matter which side you start on?
00:35:06.239 --> 00:35:10.768
The ancient teachings tell us no More modern, woo-woo teachings tell us yes.
00:35:11.148 --> 00:35:11.449
Okay.
00:35:11.751 --> 00:35:24.594
All right, the more modern things say oh well, your left side, your left nostril, is your divine feminine nostril, so receiving, so you should start.
00:35:24.594 --> 00:35:27.657
That will be the fractal, that will be the starting point, so we can do that here.
00:35:27.657 --> 00:35:28.135
So everybody we're should start.
00:35:28.135 --> 00:35:28.492
That will be the fractal, that'll be the starting point, so we can do that here.
00:35:28.492 --> 00:35:31.096
So, everybody, we're going to rest a finger.
00:35:31.096 --> 00:35:33.106
You can rest your thumb against your.
00:35:33.206 --> 00:35:42.530
Some people you know they'll rest their thumb against their right nostril and they'll use, like their middle finger or their ring finger on that right hand to close the left nostril.
00:35:42.530 --> 00:35:44.264
You don't have to put a lot of pressure on this.
00:35:44.264 --> 00:35:52.565
This is not a hard thing, this is a gentle thing.
00:35:52.565 --> 00:35:56.300
So we're going to close our right nostril long, slow, deep breath through our left.
00:35:56.300 --> 00:36:00.590
Then we close the left and out through the right.
00:36:00.590 --> 00:36:01.773
Now inhale through the right.
00:36:01.773 --> 00:36:04.813
Remember, we're not holding the breath here.
00:36:04.813 --> 00:36:29.739
Close it Out through the left, back in through the left, back in through the left, close it Out through the right and one final round Back in through the right, close it and out through the left.
00:36:29.739 --> 00:36:33.168
How do you feel Mateo's digging it?
00:36:33.168 --> 00:36:35.342
How do you feel?
00:36:35.342 --> 00:36:37.027
Francesca gives us a thumbs up.
00:36:37.027 --> 00:36:37.909
Elizabeth, how do you feel?
00:36:38.130 --> 00:36:38.471
Clear.
00:36:38.471 --> 00:36:40.764
I used to do this.
00:36:40.764 --> 00:36:42.032
I always forget about doing this.
00:36:42.032 --> 00:36:44.304
This is a thing, yeah, good to remember to do these things.
00:36:44.360 --> 00:36:45.342
This was like now.
00:36:45.342 --> 00:36:47.751
That was really a beginner amount of time.
00:36:47.751 --> 00:36:49.239
We didn't even do this for 20 seconds.
00:36:49.320 --> 00:36:53.170
I used to do this when I was tired and it would give me a lot of energy.
00:36:53.771 --> 00:37:00.567
Yeah Well, the same people who claim you should start with the left also claim that it balances the right and left hemisphere of the brain.
00:37:00.586 --> 00:37:00.706
Yeah.
00:37:01.840 --> 00:37:06.405
I don't even know if that's a thing, but I do know that this slows everything down.
00:37:06.405 --> 00:37:07.509
What do?
00:37:08.030 --> 00:37:09.293
you mean slows everything down.
00:37:10.523 --> 00:37:26.686
Slows your breathing, slows your pulse, slows everything, just settles in Again, sending really important messages like whew, you're balanced, you're in a good place here, parachute, parachute, parasympathetic.
00:37:26.686 --> 00:37:34.356
Well, thank you for joining us in our regulatory nervous system experience.
00:37:34.356 --> 00:37:39.429
However, I would like to dive just a little bit further into this concept.
00:37:39.429 --> 00:37:40.552
Hour and a half session.
00:37:40.552 --> 00:37:41.414
No, no, no.
00:37:41.414 --> 00:37:44.889
There's this one additional technique that I do want to share.
00:37:44.969 --> 00:37:46.052
It's fine, no, no, no.
00:37:46.052 --> 00:37:47.445
This is one thing I want to share too.
00:37:47.445 --> 00:37:51.860
It's all good.
00:37:51.860 --> 00:37:53.184
So there's this one additional technique that I do want to share.
00:37:53.184 --> 00:37:53.565
It's fine, no, no, no.
00:37:53.565 --> 00:37:54.429
This was one thing I want to share too.
00:37:54.429 --> 00:37:54.710
It's all good.
00:37:54.710 --> 00:37:55.532
So there's this one additional technique.
00:37:55.532 --> 00:37:56.335
This was taught to me by Dr Wayne Dyer.
00:37:56.355 --> 00:38:14.003
At the time I didn't really know him most of his life, but during his final years I was an author at Hay House and had a radio show there, so we would travel around to these I Can Do it events, and he and I connected on a pretty sweet level, and one of his favorite mantras to start the day was this don't get scared, all right, but I'm going to.
00:38:14.003 --> 00:38:16.150
Might be a little loud, but here it is.
00:38:16.150 --> 00:38:18.601
You take a long, slow, deep breath in through your nose.
00:38:18.601 --> 00:38:32.628
Now, this is like the mantra of birth and creation.
00:38:32.628 --> 00:38:36.128
It's the first sound we ever made Mateo's laughing at that one.
00:38:36.128 --> 00:38:47.594
But I'm going to ask everybody in this room to do it as well, just so you, sitting and listening at home or wherever you are, don't feel like it's just you who's being the weirdo here.
00:38:47.594 --> 00:38:52.277
But there are so many benefits to this One massive stress reliever.
00:38:52.277 --> 00:38:55.617
Number two it's invoking our creativity.
00:38:55.617 --> 00:38:59.471
Number three it's it's moving energy.
00:38:59.471 --> 00:39:00.519
It's massively moving.
00:39:00.559 --> 00:39:03.971
I mean it's like when you activate, like that you are.
00:39:03.971 --> 00:39:06.306
I used to do this with kids.
00:39:06.306 --> 00:39:07.586
Can I bring this in?
00:39:07.586 --> 00:39:08.190
Yes, in.
00:39:08.190 --> 00:39:11.784
So I made up a thing called take out the trash and I would go.
00:39:11.784 --> 00:39:18.027
I used to teach children mindfulness practices and I would do, like my heart, my heart healing practice.
00:39:18.027 --> 00:39:23.347
I have this thing called heart surgery anyway, which really helps and empties your heart of whatever you're holding onto.
00:39:23.347 --> 00:39:30.342
But when that works, when nothing else works, this is what works and it's like what you're doing.
00:39:30.342 --> 00:39:33.572
It's exactly what you just did, which I call take out to the trash.
00:39:33.619 --> 00:39:49.414
So I would say to the kids you know those trash trucks that come and pick up the trash in front of your house and they make a lot of noise and everyone's like yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm like today you get to be a trash truck and I'm like so what I want you to do is take a nice long, slow, deep breath all the way to the tips of your toes.
00:39:49.414 --> 00:39:59.885
So we go, and then on the exhale, you get to be a trash truck like that, and so it's a version of that, and so I would do this.
00:39:59.885 --> 00:40:03.971
The teachers either love me or hated me because we would make so much noise because it would be so loud.
00:40:03.971 --> 00:40:07.702
You have a classroom full of 30 kids from kindergarten through fifth grade.
00:40:07.702 --> 00:40:09.224
I would do, and we would all do.
00:40:09.224 --> 00:40:21.833
And then that sound making that sound, it's like any stuck stagnant energy is getting loosened up and then we allow it to come out.
00:40:21.833 --> 00:40:23.813
So I love this practice.
00:40:24.275 --> 00:40:28.338
Yeah, so it's the ah mantra and we can all do it.
00:40:28.338 --> 00:40:31.210
It does not require any experience whatsoever.
00:40:31.210 --> 00:40:37.092
You could be a kid taking out the trash, or you could be a 90-year-old, or even a 100-year-old, it doesn't matter.
00:40:37.092 --> 00:40:38.114
So let's all do it.
00:40:38.114 --> 00:40:51.568
Long, slow, deep breath in Ah.
00:40:51.568 --> 00:40:55.251
And that was today's takeaway.
00:40:55.692 --> 00:40:56.032
Love it.
00:40:56.032 --> 00:40:57.974
Do it with your kids.
00:40:57.974 --> 00:41:00.815
I swear this is the one thing that works when nothing else works.
00:41:00.856 --> 00:41:03.637
Do it when you're out with couples in a restaurant.
00:41:03.777 --> 00:41:06.880
Yeah, it's always great, you'll get kicked out, but that's okay, it's always great for that moment.
00:41:06.880 --> 00:41:09.666
Tell them to listen to the podcast to explain it.
00:41:10.039 --> 00:41:17.047
Well, one thing that Jamar Rogers has done for four seasons now is to help us regulate our nervous system.
00:41:17.047 --> 00:41:27.186
And Jamar, please, just listening to Jamar's creation the Shadow and the Light is enough to regulate all of our nervous systems.
00:41:51.181 --> 00:41:51.824
So let's experience it now.
00:41:51.824 --> 00:41:52.527
That is where I find my start.
00:41:52.527 --> 00:41:55.478
The light Is here to remove all my fears and to bring new sight.
00:41:55.478 --> 00:42:10.726
The light Is the cloud that will go to the deep to take me to you the shadow and the light.
00:42:10.726 --> 00:42:13.228
There's no bumping rock bottom.
00:42:13.228 --> 00:42:18.311
You hold it as you're holding me, but don't rush past this moment.
00:42:18.311 --> 00:42:21.052
The darkness can become a friend.
00:42:21.052 --> 00:42:27.478
Love will come by your side and you'll shine brighter than a million suns a million suns.
00:42:27.478 --> 00:42:31.213
You went through hell, but now you're in the light.
00:42:31.213 --> 00:42:36.309
It is here to remove all your fears and to bring new sight.
00:42:36.309 --> 00:42:48.393
The light it is not able to hold any deep to take you to new heights.
00:42:48.393 --> 00:42:53.634
The shadow and the light has come because it loves us.
00:42:53.634 --> 00:42:58.652
The light has come to set us free.
00:42:58.652 --> 00:43:03.679
The shadow comes because it loves us.
00:43:03.679 --> 00:43:08.851
The shadow comes and is free.
00:43:08.851 --> 00:43:18.579
The light Is here to remove all our fears and to bring new life.
00:43:18.579 --> 00:43:29.269
The light Is the light that will go to the deep To take us to new heights.
00:43:29.269 --> 00:43:31.907
The shadow and the light.