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Story nine of Dubliner's. This LibriVox recording is in the
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public domain. Counterparts. The bell rang furiously, and when Miss
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Parker went to the tube, a furious voice called out
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in a piercing North of Ireland accent, Send Farrington. Here.
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Miss Parker returned to her machine, saying to a man
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who was writing at a desk, mister Elaine monteu upstairs.
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The man muttered blasshom under his breath, and pushed back
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his chair to stand up. When he stood up, he
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was tall and of great bulk. He had a hanging face,
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dark wine colored, with fair eyebrows and mustache. His eyes
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bulged forward slightly, and the whites of them were dirty.
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He lifted up the counter ran, passing by the clients,
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went out of the office with a heavy step. He
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went heavily upstairs until he came to the second landing,
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where a door bore a brass plate with the inscription
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mister Elaine. Here he halted, puffing with labor and vexation
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and knocked The shrill voice cried come in. The man
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entered mister Elaine's room simultaneously. Mister Elaine, a little man
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wearing gold rimmed glasses and a clean shaven face shot
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his head up over a pile of documents. The head
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itself was so pink and hairless it seemed like a
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large egg reposing on the papers. Mister Elaine did not
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lose a moment. Farrington, what is the meaning of this?
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Why am I always to complain of you? May I
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ask you why you haven't made a copy of that
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contract between Bodley and Kirwin. I told you it must
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be ready by four o'clock. But mister Shelley said, sir.
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Mister Shelley said, sir, kindly attent to what I say,
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and not to what mister Shelley says. Sir, you have
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always some excuse or another for shirking work. Let me
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tell you that if the contract is not copied before
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this evening, I lay the matter before mister Crosbie, dear Hermin.
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I yes, sir, do you hear me? Now? I and
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another little matter. I might as well be talking to
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the wall as talking to you. Understand once for all
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that you get a half hour for your lunch and
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not an hour and a half. How many courses do
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you want? I'd like to know? Do you mind me? I? Yes, sir,
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mister Elaine bent his head again upon his pile of papers.
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The man stared fixedly at the polished skull which directed
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the affairs of Crosbie and Elane, gaging its fragility. A
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spasm of rage gripped his throat for a few moments
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and then passed, leaving after it a sharp sensation of thirst.
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The man recognized the sensation and felt that he must
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have a good night's drinking. The middle of the month
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was past, and if he could get a copy done
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in time, mister Elaine might give him an order on
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the cashier. He stood still, gazing fixedly at the head
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upon the pile of papers. Suddenly, mister Elaine began to
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upset all the papers, searching for something. Then, as if
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he had been unaware of the man's presence till that moment,
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he shut up his head again, saying, hey, are you
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going to stand there all d upon my word? Find?
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And you take things easy? I was waiting to see
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very good. You needn't wait to see. Go downstairs and
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do your work. The man walked heavily towards the door,
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and as he went out of the room, he heard
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mister Elaine cry after him that if the contract was
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not copied by evening, mister Crosby would hear of the matter.
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He returned to his desk in the lower office and
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counted the sheets which remained to be copied. He took
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up his pen and dipped it in the ink, but
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he continued to stare stupidly at the last words he
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had written. In no case shall the said Bernard Bodley
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be The evening was falling, and in a few minutes
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they would be lighting the gas. Then he could write.
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He felt that he must slake the thirst in his throat.
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He stood up from his desk, and, lifting the counter
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as before, passed out of the office. As he was
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passing out, the chief clerk looked at him inquiringly. It's
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all right, mister Shelley, said the man, pointing with his
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finger to indicate the objective of his journey. The chief
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clerk glanced at the hat rack, but seeing the row complete,
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offered no remark. As soon as he was on the landing,
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the man pulled a shepherd's plaid cap out of his pocket,
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put it on his head, and ran quickly down the
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rickety stairs from the street door. He walked on furtively
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on the inner side of the path towards the corner,
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and all at once dived into a doorway. He was
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now safe in the dark snug of O'Neill's shop, and
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filling up the little window that looked into the bar
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with his inflamed face the color of dark wine or
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dark meat, he called out here, pat give us a
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gp like a good fellow. The curate brought him a
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glass of plain porter. The man drank it at a
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gulp and asked for a carroway seed. He put his
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penny on the counter, and, leaving the curate to grope
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for it in the gloom, retreated out of the snug
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as furtively as he had entered it. Darkness, accompanied by
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a thick fog, was gaining upon the dusk of February,
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and the lamps in Eustace Street had been lit. The
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man went up by the houses until he reached the
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door of the office, wondering whether he could finish his
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copy in time. On the stairs, a moist, pungent odor
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of perfumes saluted his nose. Evidently Miss Delacour had come
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in while he was out at O'Neills. He crammed his
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cap back again into his pocket, and re entered the
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office assuming an air of absent mindedness. Mister Elaine has
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been calling for you, said the chief clerk severely. Where
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were you? The man glanced at the two clients who
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were standing at the counter, as if to intimate that
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their presence prevented him from answering. As the clients were
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both mailed, the chief clerk allowed himself a laugh. I
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know that game, he said, five times on one day
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is a little bit. Well, you'd better look sharp and
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get a copy of our correspondence in the Delacour case
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for mister Elaine. This address in the presence of a
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public His run up upstairs and the porter he had
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gupped down so hastily confused the man, and as he
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sat down at his desk to get what was required,
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he realized how hopeless was the task of finishing his
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copy of the contract Before half past five. The dark,
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damp night was coming, and he longed to spend it
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in the bars drinking with his friends. Amid the glare
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of gas and the clatter of glasses, he got out
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the Delacour correspondence and passed out of the office. He
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hoped mister Elaine would not discover that the last two
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letters were missing. The moist, pungent perfume lay all the
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way up to mister Lelaine's room. Miss Delacour was a
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middle aged woman of Jewish appearance. Mister Elaine was said
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to be sweet on her more on her money. She
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came to the office often and stayed a long time.
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When she came, she was sitting beside his desk, now
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in an aroma of perfumes, smoothing the handle of her
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umbrella and nodding the great black feather in her hat.
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Mister Elaine had swiveled his chair round to see her,
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thrown his right foot jauntily upon his left knee. The
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man put the correspondence on the desk and bowed respectfully,
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but neither mister Elaine nor miss Delacour took any notice
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of his bow. Mister Elaine tapped a finger on the
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correspondence and then flicked it towards him, as if to say,
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that's all right, you can go. The man returned to
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the lower office and sat down again at his desk.
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He stared intently at the incomplete phrase in no case
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shall the said Bernard Bodley be, and thought how strange
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it was that the last three words began with the
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same letter. The chief clerk began to hurry Miss Parker,
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saying she would never have the letters typed in time
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for post. The man listened to the clicking of the
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machine for a few minutes, and then set to work
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to finish his copy. But his head was not clear,
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and his mind wandered away to the glare and rattle
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of the public house. It was a night for hot punches.
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He struggled on with his copy, but when the clock
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struck five, he had still fourteen pages to write. Blast it.
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He couldn't finish it in time. He longed to execrate aloud,
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to bring his fist down on something violently. He was
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so enraged that he wrote Bernard Bernard instead of Bernard
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Bodley and had to begin again on a clean sheet.
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He felt strong enough to clear out the whole off
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a single handed. His body ached to do something, to
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rush out and revel in violence. All the indignities of
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his life enraged him. Could he ask the cashier privately
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for an advance? No, the cashier was no good, No
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damn good. He wouldn't give an advance. He knew where
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he would meet the boys, Leonard, and O'Halloran and Nosey Flynn.
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The barometer of his emotional nature was set for a
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spell of riot. His imagination had so abstracted him that
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his name was called twice before he answered. Mister Elaine
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and Miss Delacour were standing outside the counter, and all
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the clerks had turned round in anticipation of something. The
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man got up from his desk. Mister Elaine began a
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tirail of abuse, saying that two letters were missing. The
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man answered that he knew nothing about them, that he
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had made a faithful copy. The tirade continued. It was
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so bitter and violent that the man could hardly restrain
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his fist from descending upon the head of the mannikin
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before him. I know nothing about any other two letters,
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he said, stupidly. Ye know nothing. Of course you know nothing,
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said mister Elaine. Tell me, he added, glancing first for
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approval to the lady beside him. Do ye take me
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for a fool? Do you think me and not a fool?
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The man glanced from the lady's face to the little
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egg shaped head and back again, and almost before he
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was aware of it, his tongue had found a felicitous moment.
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I don't think, sir, He said that that's a fair
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question to put to me. There was a pause in
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the very breathing of the clerks. Every one was astounded.
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The author of the will no less than his neighbor's,
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and Miss Delacour, who was a stout, amiable person, began
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to smile broadly. Mister Elaine flushed to the hue of
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a wild rose, and his mouth twisted with the dwarf's passion.
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He shook his fist in the man's face till it
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seemed to vibrate like the knob of some electric machine.
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You impertinent, ruffian, You impertinent ruffian. I'll make short work
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of you. Wait till you see you'll apologize to me
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for your impertinence, or you quit the office. Instanter, You
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quit this office, I'm telling you are you'll apologize to me.
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He stood in the doorway opposite the office, watching to
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see if the cashier would come out alone. All the
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clerks passed out, and finally the cashier came out with
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the chief clerk. It is no use trying to say
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a word to him. When he was with the chief clerk.
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The man felt that his position was bad enough. He
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had been obliged to offer an abject apology to mister
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Elaine for his impertinence. But he knew what a hornet's
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nest the office would be for him. He could remember
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the way in which mister Elaine had hounded a little
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peque out of the office in order to make room
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for his own nephew. He felt savage and thirsty and revengeful,
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annoyed with himself and with every one else. Mister Elaine
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would never give him an hour's rest. His life would
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be a hell to him. He had made a proper
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fool of himself this time. Could he not keep his
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tongue in his cheek. But they had never pulled together
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from the first, he and mister Elaine ever since the
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day mister Elaine had overheard him mimicking his North of
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Ireland accent to amuse Higgins and miss Parker. That had
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been the beginning of it. He might have tried Higgins
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for the money, which Higgins never had anything for himself,
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a man with two establishments to keep up. Of course,
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he couldn't. He felt his great body again aching for
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the comfort of the public house. The fog had begun
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to chill him, and he wondered could he touch Pat
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and O'Neills. He could not touch him for more than
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a bob. Not a bob was no use. Yet he
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must get money somewhere or other. He had spent his
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last penny for the g P, and soon it would
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be too late for getting money anywhere. Suddenly, as he
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was fingering his watch chain, he thought of Terry Kelly's
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pawn office in Fleet Street. That was the dart. Why
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didn't he think of it sooner? He went through the
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narrow valley of Temple Bar, quickly muttering to himself that
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they could all go to hell, because he was going
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to have a good night of it. The clerk and
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Terry Kelly set a crown, but the consigner held out
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for six shillings, and in the end the six shillings
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was allowed him. Literally, he came out of the pawn office,
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joyfully making a little cylinder of the coins between his
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thumb and fingers. In Westmoreland Street, the foot paths were
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crowded with young men and women returning from business, and
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ragged urchins ran here and there yelling out the names
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of the evening editions. The man passed through the crowd,
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looking on the spectacle generally with proud satisfaction, and staring
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masterfully at the office girl's. His head was full of
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the noises of tramgongs and swishing trolleys, and his nose
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already sniffed the curling fumes of punch. As he walked on,
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he preconsidered the terms in which he would narrate the
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incident to the boys. So I just looked at him coolly,
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you know, I looked at horror. Then I looked back
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at him again. Take my time, you know. Oh, I
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don't think that's a fair question to put to me,
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says he Nosey Flynn was sitting up in his usual
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corner of davy Burns, and when he heard the story,
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he stood Farrington a half one, saying it was as
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smart a thing as ever he heard. Farrington stood a
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drink in his turn. After a while O'Halloran and Paddy
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Leonard came in and the story was repeated to them.
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O'Halloran stood tailors of malt hot all round and told
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the story of the retort he had made to the
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chief clerk when he was in Canons of Founds the street.
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But as The retort was after the manner of the
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liberal shepherds in the Ecologues, yet to admit that it
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was not as clever as Farrington's retort. At this Farrington
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the boys to polish off that and have another, just
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as they were naming their poisons. Who should come in
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but Higgins, of course, he had to join him with
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the others. The men asked them to give his version
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of it, and he did so with great vivacity, for
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the sight of five small hot whiskies was very exhilarating.
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Everyone roared laughing when he showed the way in which
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mister Elaine shook his fist in Farrington's face. Then he
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imitated Farrington saying, and here was my knabs, as cool
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as you please, while Farrington looked at the company out
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of his heavy dirty eyes, smiling and at times drawing
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forth stray drops of liquor from his mustache with the
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aid of his lower lip. When that round was over,
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there was a pause. O'Halloran had money, but neither of
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the other two seemed to have any, so the whole
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party left the shop somewhat regretfully. At the corner of
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Duke Street, Higgins and Nosey Flynn beveled off to the
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left while the other three turned back towards the city.
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Rain was drizzling down on the cold streets, and when
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they reached the Ballast office, Farrington suggested the Scotch House.
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The bar was full of men and loud with the
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noise of tongues and glasses. The three men pushed past
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the whining match cellars at the door and formed a
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little party at the corner of the counter. They began
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to exchange stories. Leonard introduced them to a young fellow
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named Weathers, who was performing at Nativoli as an acrobat
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and knock about artiste. Farrington stood a drink all round.
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Weather said he would take a small irish and a pollinarus. Farrington,
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who had definite notions of what was what, asked the
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boys would they have an apollinaris too, but the boys
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told Tim to make theirs hot. The talk became theatrical.
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O'Halloran stood around, and then Farrington stood another round Weathers,
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protesting that the hospitality was too irish. He promised to
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get them in behind the scenes and introduced them to
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some nice girls. O'Halloran said that he and Leonard would go,
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but that Farrington wouldn't go because he was a married man,
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and Farrington's heavy, dirty eyes leered at the company in
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token that he understood he was being chaffed. Weathers made
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them all have just one little tincture at his expense,
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and promised to meet them later on at Mulligan's in
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Pool Bay Street. When the Scotch house closed, they went
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round to Mulligan's. They went into the parlor at the back,
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and o'halloman ordered small hot specials all round. They were
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all beginning to feel mellow. Farrington was just standing another
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round when Weathers came back. Much to Farrington's relief, he
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drank a glass of bitter this time. Funds were getting low,
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but they had enough to keep them going. Presently, two
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young women with big hats and a young man in
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a check suit came in and sat at a table
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close by. Weathers saluted them and told the company that
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they were out of the tivoli. Farrington's eyes wandered at
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every moment in the direction of one of the young women.
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There was something striking in her appearance. An immense scarf
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of peacock blue muslin was round round her hat and
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knotted in a great bow under her chin, and she
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wore bright yellow gloves reaching to the elbow. Founding gazed
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admiringly at the plump arm, which she moved very often
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and with much grace. And when after a little time
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she answered his gaze, he admired still more her large,
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dark brown eyes. The oblique staring expression in them fascinated him.
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She glanced at him once or twice, and when the
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party was leaving the room, she brushed against his chair
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and said, oh, pardon, in a London accent. He watched
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her leave the room in the hope that she would
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look back at him, but he was disappointed. He cursed
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his want of money, and cursed all the rounds he
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had stood, particularly all the whiskies and the pollenaris which
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he had stood. To Weathers, if there was one thing
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he hated, it was a sponge. He was so angry
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that he lost count of the conversation of his friends.
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When Paddy Leonard called him, he found that they were
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talking about feats of strain. Weathers was showing his biceps
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muscle to the company and boasting so much that the
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other two had called on Farrington to appoll the national honor.
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Farrington pulled up his sleeve accordingly and showed his biceps
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muscle to the company. The two arms were examined and compared,
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and finally it was agreed to have a trial of strength.
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The table was cleared and the two men rested their
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elbows on it, clasping hands. When Paddy Leonard said go,
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each was to try to bring down the other's hand
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on to the table. Farrington looked very serious and determined.
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The trial began. After about thirty seconds, Weathers brought his
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opponent's hands slowly down on to the table. Farrington's dark
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wine colored face flushed darker, still with anger and humiliation
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at having been defeated by such a stripling. You're not
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to put the weight to your body behind it. Playfair,
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he said, It was not plain fair, said the other.
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Come on again, the two best our tree. The trial
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began again. The veins stood out on Farrington's forehead, and
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the pallor of Weather's complexion changed to peeny. The hands
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and arms trembled under the stress. After a long struggle,
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Weathers again brought his opponent's hands slowly on to the table.
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There was a murmur of applause from the spectators. The curate,
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who was standing beside the table, nodded his red head
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towards the victor and said, with stupid familiarity. Ah, that's
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the knack. What the hell do you know about it?
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Said Farrington, fiercely, turning on the man. What do you
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put in your gab for? Sh said O'Halloran, observing the
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violent expression on Farrington's face. Pony up, boys, We'll have
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just one little smahan more and then we be off.
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A very sullen faced man stood at the corner of
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a colonell bridge, waiting for the little Sandy Mount tram
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to take him home. He was full of smoldering anger
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and revengefulness. He felt humiliated and discontented. He did not
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even feel and he had only twopence in his pocket.
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He cursed everything he had done for himself at the office,
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pawned his watch, spent all his money, and he had
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not even got drunk. He began to feel thirsty again
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and longed to be back again in the hot Reeking
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public house. He lost his reputation as a strong man,
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having been defeated twice by a mere boy. His heart
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swelled with fury, and when he thought of the woman
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in the big hat, who had brushed against him and said,
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pardon his fury nearly choked him. His tram let him
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down at Shelbourne Road, and he steered his great body
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along the shadow of the wall of the barracks. He
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loathes returning to his home. When he went in by
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the side door, he found the kitchen empty and the
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kitchen fire nearly out. He bawled upstairs. Aida. Aida, His
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wife was a little, sharp faced woman who bullied her
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husband when he was sober, and was bullied by him
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when he was drunk. They had five children. A little
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boy came running down the stairs. Who is that? Said
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the man, peering through the darkness. Me, Pa, who are
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you Charlie? No, Pa, Tom, where's your mother? She's out
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at the chapel. That's right. Did you think of leaving
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any dinner for me? Yes, Polly, light the lamp. What
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do you mean by having the place in darkness? Have
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the other children in bed? The man sat down heavily
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on one of the chairs while the little boy lit
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the lamp. He began to mimic his son's flat accent,
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saying half to himself, at the chapel, At the chapel,
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if your place. When the lamp was lit, he banged
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his fist on the table and shouted, what's from my dinner?
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I'm going to cook it, pa, said the little boy.
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The man jumped up furiously and pointed to the fire.
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On that fire, you let the fire out, By God,
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I'll teach you to do that again. He took a
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step to the door and seized the walking stick, which
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was standing behind it. I'll teach you to let the
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fire out, he said, rolling up his sleeve in order
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to give his arm free play. The little boy cried,
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oh Pa, and ran whimpering round the table, but the
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man followed him and caught him by the coat. The
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little boy looked wildly about him, but, seeing no way
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of escape, fell upon his knees. Now you'll let the
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foil out the next time, said the man, striking at
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him vigorously with a stick. Take that, your little whelp.
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The boy uttered a squeal of pain as the stick
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cut his tie. He clasped his hands together in the
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air and his voice shook with fright. No, Pa, he cried,
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don't beat me, pa, And I'll oh won't say a
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hail Mary for you, I'll say a hell Mary for
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your pa, If you don't beat me, don't say I
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Hail Mary. End of story. Nine counterparts
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Story nine of Dubliner's. This LibriVox recording is in the
2
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public domain. Counterparts. The bell rang furiously, and when Miss
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Parker went to the tube, a furious voice called out
4
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in a piercing North of Ireland accent, Send Farrington. Here.
5
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Miss Parker returned to her machine, saying to a man
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who was writing at a desk, mister Elaine monteu upstairs.
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The man muttered blasshom under his breath, and pushed back
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his chair to stand up. When he stood up, he
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was tall and of great bulk. He had a hanging face,
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dark wine colored, with fair eyebrows and mustache. His eyes
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bulged forward slightly, and the whites of them were dirty.
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He lifted up the counter ran, passing by the clients,
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went out of the office with a heavy step. He
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went heavily upstairs until he came to the second landing,
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where a door bore a brass plate with the inscription
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mister Elaine. Here he halted, puffing with labor and vexation
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and knocked The shrill voice cried come in. The man
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entered mister Elaine's room simultaneously. Mister Elaine, a little man
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wearing gold rimmed glasses and a clean shaven face shot
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his head up over a pile of documents. The head
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itself was so pink and hairless it seemed like a
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large egg reposing on the papers. Mister Elaine did not
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lose a moment. Farrington, what is the meaning of this?
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Why am I always to complain of you? May I
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ask you why you haven't made a copy of that
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contract between Bodley and Kirwin. I told you it must
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be ready by four o'clock. But mister Shelley said, sir.
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Mister Shelley said, sir, kindly attent to what I say,
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and not to what mister Shelley says. Sir, you have
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always some excuse or another for shirking work. Let me
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tell you that if the contract is not copied before
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this evening, I lay the matter before mister Crosbie, dear Hermin.
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I yes, sir, do you hear me? Now? I and
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another little matter. I might as well be talking to
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the wall as talking to you. Understand once for all
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that you get a half hour for your lunch and
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not an hour and a half. How many courses do
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you want? I'd like to know? Do you mind me? I? Yes, sir,
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mister Elaine bent his head again upon his pile of papers.
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The man stared fixedly at the polished skull which directed
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the affairs of Crosbie and Elane, gaging its fragility. A
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spasm of rage gripped his throat for a few moments
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and then passed, leaving after it a sharp sensation of thirst.
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The man recognized the sensation and felt that he must
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have a good night's drinking. The middle of the month
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was past, and if he could get a copy done
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in time, mister Elaine might give him an order on
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the cashier. He stood still, gazing fixedly at the head
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upon the pile of papers. Suddenly, mister Elaine began to
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upset all the papers, searching for something. Then, as if
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he had been unaware of the man's presence till that moment,
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he shut up his head again, saying, hey, are you
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going to stand there all d upon my word? Find?
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And you take things easy? I was waiting to see
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very good. You needn't wait to see. Go downstairs and
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do your work. The man walked heavily towards the door,
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and as he went out of the room, he heard
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mister Elaine cry after him that if the contract was
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not copied by evening, mister Crosby would hear of the matter.
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He returned to his desk in the lower office and
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counted the sheets which remained to be copied. He took
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up his pen and dipped it in the ink, but
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he continued to stare stupidly at the last words he
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had written. In no case shall the said Bernard Bodley
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be The evening was falling, and in a few minutes
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they would be lighting the gas. Then he could write.
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He felt that he must slake the thirst in his throat.
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He stood up from his desk, and, lifting the counter
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as before, passed out of the office. As he was
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passing out, the chief clerk looked at him inquiringly. It's
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all right, mister Shelley, said the man, pointing with his
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finger to indicate the objective of his journey. The chief
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clerk glanced at the hat rack, but seeing the row complete,
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offered no remark. As soon as he was on the landing,
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the man pulled a shepherd's plaid cap out of his pocket,
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put it on his head, and ran quickly down the
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rickety stairs from the street door. He walked on furtively
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on the inner side of the path towards the corner,
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and all at once dived into a doorway. He was
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now safe in the dark snug of O'Neill's shop, and
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filling up the little window that looked into the bar
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with his inflamed face the color of dark wine or
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dark meat, he called out here, pat give us a
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gp like a good fellow. The curate brought him a
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glass of plain porter. The man drank it at a
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gulp and asked for a carroway seed. He put his
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penny on the counter, and, leaving the curate to grope
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for it in the gloom, retreated out of the snug
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as furtively as he had entered it. Darkness, accompanied by
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a thick fog, was gaining upon the dusk of February,
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and the lamps in Eustace Street had been lit. The
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man went up by the houses until he reached the
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door of the office, wondering whether he could finish his
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copy in time. On the stairs, a moist, pungent odor
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of perfumes saluted his nose. Evidently Miss Delacour had come
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in while he was out at O'Neills. He crammed his
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cap back again into his pocket, and re entered the
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office assuming an air of absent mindedness. Mister Elaine has
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been calling for you, said the chief clerk severely. Where
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were you? The man glanced at the two clients who
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were standing at the counter, as if to intimate that
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their presence prevented him from answering. As the clients were
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both mailed, the chief clerk allowed himself a laugh. I
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know that game, he said, five times on one day
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is a little bit. Well, you'd better look sharp and
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get a copy of our correspondence in the Delacour case
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for mister Elaine. This address in the presence of a
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public His run up upstairs and the porter he had
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gupped down so hastily confused the man, and as he
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sat down at his desk to get what was required,
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he realized how hopeless was the task of finishing his
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copy of the contract Before half past five. The dark,
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damp night was coming, and he longed to spend it
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in the bars drinking with his friends. Amid the glare
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of gas and the clatter of glasses, he got out
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the Delacour correspondence and passed out of the office. He
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hoped mister Elaine would not discover that the last two
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letters were missing. The moist, pungent perfume lay all the
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way up to mister Lelaine's room. Miss Delacour was a
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middle aged woman of Jewish appearance. Mister Elaine was said
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to be sweet on her more on her money. She
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came to the office often and stayed a long time.
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When she came, she was sitting beside his desk, now
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in an aroma of perfumes, smoothing the handle of her
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umbrella and nodding the great black feather in her hat.
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Mister Elaine had swiveled his chair round to see her,
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thrown his right foot jauntily upon his left knee. The
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man put the correspondence on the desk and bowed respectfully,
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but neither mister Elaine nor miss Delacour took any notice
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of his bow. Mister Elaine tapped a finger on the
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correspondence and then flicked it towards him, as if to say,
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that's all right, you can go. The man returned to
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the lower office and sat down again at his desk.
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He stared intently at the incomplete phrase in no case
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shall the said Bernard Bodley be, and thought how strange
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it was that the last three words began with the
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same letter. The chief clerk began to hurry Miss Parker,
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saying she would never have the letters typed in time
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for post. The man listened to the clicking of the
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machine for a few minutes, and then set to work
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to finish his copy. But his head was not clear,
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and his mind wandered away to the glare and rattle
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of the public house. It was a night for hot punches.
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He struggled on with his copy, but when the clock
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struck five, he had still fourteen pages to write. Blast it.
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He couldn't finish it in time. He longed to execrate aloud,
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to bring his fist down on something violently. He was
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so enraged that he wrote Bernard Bernard instead of Bernard
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Bodley and had to begin again on a clean sheet.
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He felt strong enough to clear out the whole off
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a single handed. His body ached to do something, to
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rush out and revel in violence. All the indignities of
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his life enraged him. Could he ask the cashier privately
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for an advance? No, the cashier was no good, No
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damn good. He wouldn't give an advance. He knew where
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he would meet the boys, Leonard, and O'Halloran and Nosey Flynn.
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The barometer of his emotional nature was set for a
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spell of riot. His imagination had so abstracted him that
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his name was called twice before he answered. Mister Elaine
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and Miss Delacour were standing outside the counter, and all
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the clerks had turned round in anticipation of something. The
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man got up from his desk. Mister Elaine began a
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tirail of abuse, saying that two letters were missing. The
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man answered that he knew nothing about them, that he
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had made a faithful copy. The tirade continued. It was
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so bitter and violent that the man could hardly restrain
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his fist from descending upon the head of the mannikin
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before him. I know nothing about any other two letters,
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he said, stupidly. Ye know nothing. Of course you know nothing,
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said mister Elaine. Tell me, he added, glancing first for
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approval to the lady beside him. Do ye take me
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for a fool? Do you think me and not a fool?
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The man glanced from the lady's face to the little
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egg shaped head and back again, and almost before he
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was aware of it, his tongue had found a felicitous moment.
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I don't think, sir, He said that that's a fair
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question to put to me. There was a pause in
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the very breathing of the clerks. Every one was astounded.
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The author of the will no less than his neighbor's,
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and Miss Delacour, who was a stout, amiable person, began
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to smile broadly. Mister Elaine flushed to the hue of
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a wild rose, and his mouth twisted with the dwarf's passion.
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He shook his fist in the man's face till it
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seemed to vibrate like the knob of some electric machine.
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You impertinent, ruffian, You impertinent ruffian. I'll make short work
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of you. Wait till you see you'll apologize to me
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for your impertinence, or you quit the office. Instanter, You
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quit this office, I'm telling you are you'll apologize to me.
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He stood in the doorway opposite the office, watching to
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see if the cashier would come out alone. All the
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clerks passed out, and finally the cashier came out with
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the chief clerk. It is no use trying to say
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a word to him. When he was with the chief clerk.
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The man felt that his position was bad enough. He
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had been obliged to offer an abject apology to mister
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Elaine for his impertinence. But he knew what a hornet's
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nest the office would be for him. He could remember
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the way in which mister Elaine had hounded a little
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peque out of the office in order to make room
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for his own nephew. He felt savage and thirsty and revengeful,
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annoyed with himself and with every one else. Mister Elaine
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would never give him an hour's rest. His life would
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be a hell to him. He had made a proper
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fool of himself this time. Could he not keep his
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tongue in his cheek. But they had never pulled together
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from the first, he and mister Elaine ever since the
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day mister Elaine had overheard him mimicking his North of
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Ireland accent to amuse Higgins and miss Parker. That had
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been the beginning of it. He might have tried Higgins
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for the money, which Higgins never had anything for himself,
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a man with two establishments to keep up. Of course,
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he couldn't. He felt his great body again aching for
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the comfort of the public house. The fog had begun
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to chill him, and he wondered could he touch Pat
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and O'Neills. He could not touch him for more than
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a bob. Not a bob was no use. Yet he
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must get money somewhere or other. He had spent his
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last penny for the g P, and soon it would
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be too late for getting money anywhere. Suddenly, as he
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was fingering his watch chain, he thought of Terry Kelly's
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pawn office in Fleet Street. That was the dart. Why
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didn't he think of it sooner? He went through the
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narrow valley of Temple Bar, quickly muttering to himself that
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they could all go to hell, because he was going
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to have a good night of it. The clerk and
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Terry Kelly set a crown, but the consigner held out
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for six shillings, and in the end the six shillings
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was allowed him. Literally, he came out of the pawn office,
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joyfully making a little cylinder of the coins between his
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thumb and fingers. In Westmoreland Street, the foot paths were
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crowded with young men and women returning from business, and
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ragged urchins ran here and there yelling out the names
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of the evening editions. The man passed through the crowd,
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looking on the spectacle generally with proud satisfaction, and staring
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masterfully at the office girl's. His head was full of
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the noises of tramgongs and swishing trolleys, and his nose
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already sniffed the curling fumes of punch. As he walked on,
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he preconsidered the terms in which he would narrate the
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incident to the boys. So I just looked at him coolly,
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you know, I looked at horror. Then I looked back
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at him again. Take my time, you know. Oh, I
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don't think that's a fair question to put to me,
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says he Nosey Flynn was sitting up in his usual
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corner of davy Burns, and when he heard the story,
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he stood Farrington a half one, saying it was as
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smart a thing as ever he heard. Farrington stood a
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drink in his turn. After a while O'Halloran and Paddy
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Leonard came in and the story was repeated to them.
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O'Halloran stood tailors of malt hot all round and told
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the story of the retort he had made to the
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chief clerk when he was in Canons of Founds the street.
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But as The retort was after the manner of the
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liberal shepherds in the Ecologues, yet to admit that it
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was not as clever as Farrington's retort. At this Farrington
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the boys to polish off that and have another, just
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as they were naming their poisons. Who should come in
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but Higgins, of course, he had to join him with
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the others. The men asked them to give his version
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of it, and he did so with great vivacity, for
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the sight of five small hot whiskies was very exhilarating.
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Everyone roared laughing when he showed the way in which
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mister Elaine shook his fist in Farrington's face. Then he
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imitated Farrington saying, and here was my knabs, as cool
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as you please, while Farrington looked at the company out
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of his heavy dirty eyes, smiling and at times drawing
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forth stray drops of liquor from his mustache with the
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aid of his lower lip. When that round was over,
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there was a pause. O'Halloran had money, but neither of
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the other two seemed to have any, so the whole
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party left the shop somewhat regretfully. At the corner of
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Duke Street, Higgins and Nosey Flynn beveled off to the
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left while the other three turned back towards the city.
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Rain was drizzling down on the cold streets, and when
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they reached the Ballast office, Farrington suggested the Scotch House.
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The bar was full of men and loud with the
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noise of tongues and glasses. The three men pushed past
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the whining match cellars at the door and formed a
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little party at the corner of the counter. They began
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to exchange stories. Leonard introduced them to a young fellow
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named Weathers, who was performing at Nativoli as an acrobat
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and knock about artiste. Farrington stood a drink all round.
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Weather said he would take a small irish and a pollinarus. Farrington,
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who had definite notions of what was what, asked the
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boys would they have an apollinaris too, but the boys
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told Tim to make theirs hot. The talk became theatrical.
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O'Halloran stood around, and then Farrington stood another round Weathers,
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protesting that the hospitality was too irish. He promised to
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get them in behind the scenes and introduced them to
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some nice girls. O'Halloran said that he and Leonard would go,
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but that Farrington wouldn't go because he was a married man,
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and Farrington's heavy, dirty eyes leered at the company in
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token that he understood he was being chaffed. Weathers made
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them all have just one little tincture at his expense,
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and promised to meet them later on at Mulligan's in
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Pool Bay Street. When the Scotch house closed, they went
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round to Mulligan's. They went into the parlor at the back,
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and o'halloman ordered small hot specials all round. They were
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all beginning to feel mellow. Farrington was just standing another
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round when Weathers came back. Much to Farrington's relief, he
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drank a glass of bitter this time. Funds were getting low,
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but they had enough to keep them going. Presently, two
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young women with big hats and a young man in
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a check suit came in and sat at a table
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close by. Weathers saluted them and told the company that
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they were out of the tivoli. Farrington's eyes wandered at
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every moment in the direction of one of the young women.
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There was something striking in her appearance. An immense scarf
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of peacock blue muslin was round round her hat and
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knotted in a great bow under her chin, and she
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wore bright yellow gloves reaching to the elbow. Founding gazed
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admiringly at the plump arm, which she moved very often
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and with much grace. And when after a little time
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she answered his gaze, he admired still more her large,
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dark brown eyes. The oblique staring expression in them fascinated him.
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She glanced at him once or twice, and when the
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party was leaving the room, she brushed against his chair
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and said, oh, pardon, in a London accent. He watched
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her leave the room in the hope that she would
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look back at him, but he was disappointed. He cursed
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his want of money, and cursed all the rounds he
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had stood, particularly all the whiskies and the pollenaris which
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he had stood. To Weathers, if there was one thing
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he hated, it was a sponge. He was so angry
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that he lost count of the conversation of his friends.
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When Paddy Leonard called him, he found that they were
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talking about feats of strain. Weathers was showing his biceps
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muscle to the company and boasting so much that the
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other two had called on Farrington to appoll the national honor.
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Farrington pulled up his sleeve accordingly and showed his biceps
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muscle to the company. The two arms were examined and compared,
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and finally it was agreed to have a trial of strength.
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The table was cleared and the two men rested their
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elbows on it, clasping hands. When Paddy Leonard said go,
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each was to try to bring down the other's hand
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on to the table. Farrington looked very serious and determined.
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The trial began. After about thirty seconds, Weathers brought his
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opponent's hands slowly down on to the table. Farrington's dark
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wine colored face flushed darker, still with anger and humiliation
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at having been defeated by such a stripling. You're not
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to put the weight to your body behind it. Playfair,
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he said, It was not plain fair, said the other.
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Come on again, the two best our tree. The trial
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began again. The veins stood out on Farrington's forehead, and
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the pallor of Weather's complexion changed to peeny. The hands
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and arms trembled under the stress. After a long struggle,
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Weathers again brought his opponent's hands slowly on to the table.
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There was a murmur of applause from the spectators. The curate,
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who was standing beside the table, nodded his red head
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towards the victor and said, with stupid familiarity. Ah, that's
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the knack. What the hell do you know about it?
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Said Farrington, fiercely, turning on the man. What do you
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put in your gab for? Sh said O'Halloran, observing the
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violent expression on Farrington's face. Pony up, boys, We'll have
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just one little smahan more and then we be off.
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A very sullen faced man stood at the corner of
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a colonell bridge, waiting for the little Sandy Mount tram
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to take him home. He was full of smoldering anger
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and revengefulness. He felt humiliated and discontented. He did not
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even feel and he had only twopence in his pocket.
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He cursed everything he had done for himself at the office,
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pawned his watch, spent all his money, and he had
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not even got drunk. He began to feel thirsty again
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and longed to be back again in the hot Reeking
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public house. He lost his reputation as a strong man,
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having been defeated twice by a mere boy. His heart
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swelled with fury, and when he thought of the woman
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in the big hat, who had brushed against him and said,
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pardon his fury nearly choked him. His tram let him
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down at Shelbourne Road, and he steered his great body
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along the shadow of the wall of the barracks. He
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loathes returning to his home. When he went in by
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the side door, he found the kitchen empty and the
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kitchen fire nearly out. He bawled upstairs. Aida. Aida, His
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wife was a little, sharp faced woman who bullied her
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husband when he was sober, and was bullied by him
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when he was drunk. They had five children. A little
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boy came running down the stairs. Who is that? Said
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the man, peering through the darkness. Me, Pa, who are
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you Charlie? No, Pa, Tom, where's your mother? She's out
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at the chapel. That's right. Did you think of leaving
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any dinner for me? Yes, Polly, light the lamp. What
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do you mean by having the place in darkness? Have
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the other children in bed? The man sat down heavily
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on one of the chairs while the little boy lit
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the lamp. He began to mimic his son's flat accent,
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saying half to himself, at the chapel, At the chapel,
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if your place. When the lamp was lit, he banged
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his fist on the table and shouted, what's from my dinner?
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I'm going to cook it, pa, said the little boy.
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The man jumped up furiously and pointed to the fire.
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On that fire, you let the fire out, By God,
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I'll teach you to do that again. He took a
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step to the door and seized the walking stick, which
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was standing behind it. I'll teach you to let the
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fire out, he said, rolling up his sleeve in order
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to give his arm free play. The little boy cried,
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oh Pa, and ran whimpering round the table, but the
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man followed him and caught him by the coat. The
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little boy looked wildly about him, but, seeing no way
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of escape, fell upon his knees. Now you'll let the
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foil out the next time, said the man, striking at
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him vigorously with a stick. Take that, your little whelp.
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The boy uttered a squeal of pain as the stick
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cut his tie. He clasped his hands together in the
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air and his voice shook with fright. No, Pa, he cried,
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don't beat me, pa, And I'll oh won't say a
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hail Mary for you, I'll say a hell Mary for
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your pa, If you don't beat me, don't say I
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Hail Mary. End of story. Nine counterparts
