Toxic Masculinity SOLVED with Greg Boyd

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Speaker 0: It does come back to the insecurity piece.
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Speaker 0: It's something that I've never talked about.
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Speaker 0: I could never how would I tell one of my friends that
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Speaker 0: something great has happened to them and that I'm actually not very happy for
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Speaker 0: them, that I'm a little happier when things don't go well.
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Speaker 0: Just seems like such a terrible
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Speaker 0: trait to have.
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Speaker 0: I agree.
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Speaker 0: It's much more common than anybody would talk about.
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Speaker 0: You and I, when we first met, we were sort of tech bros.
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Speaker 0: You left and got a a big job, and then I was a VP,
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Speaker 0: and then you were a VP, and we get together and have a beer.
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Speaker 0: I don't think either of us was happy for the other person ever.
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Speaker 1: Okay.
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Speaker 0: We're just sort of put on this, you know, facade of, hey.
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Speaker 0: Oh, it's real.
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Speaker 0: You're doing some great things, man.
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Speaker 0: It's so great.
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Speaker 0: And we're just like, fuck that guy.
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Speaker 1: Totally.
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Speaker 1: So I I am sure there were multiple occasions where people would ask me,
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Speaker 1: oh, do you hear Bob just got promoted to VP?
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Speaker 1: I'd be like, that guy is not a vice president.
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Speaker 1: That guy guy that is gonna go down in flames.
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Speaker 1: I I I'm sure that I said that behind your back.
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Speaker 0: Alright.
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Speaker 0: Welcome to the Growth Mixtape podcast, and I'm your host, Bob Mathers.
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Speaker 0: Today, I welcome back Greg Boyd to the show.
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Speaker 0: He first came on just over a year ago to share his emotional story
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Speaker 0: from becoming a bigwig exec to losing his wife suddenly during COVID,
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Speaker 0: finding love again, and founding Vienna Waits with his new wife, Whitney, who are
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Speaker 0: on a mission to help a million people live more intentional
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Speaker 0: lives.
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Speaker 0: That conversation had lots of tears.
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Speaker 0: So if you're into that kind of thing, go check it out.
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Speaker 0: Today's conversation is very different, more lighthearted, more spontaneous.
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Speaker 0: It's a new format I'm experimenting
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Speaker 0: with where I bring two topics, the guest brings two topics, and we don't
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Speaker 0: share them in advance.
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Speaker 0: We press record, and we see what happens.
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Speaker 0: And as you'll hear, it's a bit messy, but it's so real.
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Speaker 0: And in a world where everything is so polished, edited, and performative, there's
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Speaker 0: something refreshingly vulnerable and honest about these conversations.
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Speaker 0: It's real life.
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Speaker 0: You don't always say the perfect thing.
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Speaker 0: You don't always sound like the smartest person in the room.
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Speaker 0: You find comfort in awkward silences, and you talk about things you'd never
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Speaker 0: have talked about about otherwise.
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Speaker 0: And that's the point.
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Speaker 0: It's about authentic curiosity.
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Speaker 0: It's about connection, and we all need more of that.
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Speaker 0: What do we talk about?
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Speaker 0: The power of music to anchor us to places in time.
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Speaker 0: Why men suck and how we're trying to be better dads and doing your
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Speaker 0: best work in your fifties.
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Speaker 0: Oh, and we pretty much solve toxic masculinity.
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Speaker 0: Please enjoy Greg Boyd.
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Speaker 0: Welcome, Greg Boyd.
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Speaker 0: Back to the show.
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Speaker 0: Here we go.
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Speaker 1: It's good to be back.
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Speaker 1: As if it just took about a year, year and a half for for
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Speaker 1: me to weasel my way back on here, but I I appreciate I appreciate
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Speaker 1: the opportunity to come back on this, Bob.
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Speaker 0: It's funny you mentioned that.
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Speaker 0: I went back and listened to the our original episode where I had you
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Speaker 0: on.
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Speaker 0: If I asked you how long ago that was, what would you say?
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Speaker 1: I I do think I think it was spring of spring of twenty
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Speaker 1: five, which would put it at just over just over a year ago.
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Speaker 1: I think I think that's where we're at, about a year year and change.
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Speaker 1: I said a year and a half, but I like to exaggerate.
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Speaker 1: It's my
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Speaker 0: It's interesting you say that because if you had asked me, I'd say, oh,
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Speaker 0: that feels like two years ago.
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Speaker 1: Mhmm.
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Speaker 0: But it was it was released a year ago tomorrow.
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Speaker 0: Three hundred and sixty four days.
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Speaker 1: Oh, man.
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Speaker 1: Oh, well, Bob, that's almost poetic.
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Speaker 1: Here we are probably a year later.
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Speaker 0: I wonder why it feels longer.
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Speaker 0: I don't know.
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Speaker 0: But, anyway, that's interesting.
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Speaker 1: A lot of
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Speaker 0: Yeah.
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Speaker 0: I'm ex I'm excited about this because, you know, it's a format
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Speaker 0: that I'm experimenting with.
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Speaker 0: Whitney, your wife, was on, let's say, a month or so ago, and we
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Speaker 0: did one of these things where she brings two topics, I bring two topics.
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Speaker 0: We don't share them, and we just see what happens.
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Speaker 0: And I'm enjoying them more and more.
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Speaker 0: I get a little anxious about them because I have no idea what you're
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Speaker 0: gonna spring on me.
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Speaker 1: I know.
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Speaker 0: Which feels very scary and kind of vulnerable, and I appreciate that you
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Speaker 0: might feel some of that too.
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Speaker 0: So it just feels like
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Speaker 0: it could be magical.
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Speaker 0: It could be awkward as shit.
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Speaker 0: I mean, who knows?
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Speaker 1: Oh, man.
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Speaker 1: We are magic makers, Bob.
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Speaker 1: Let's let's be real.
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Speaker 1: We're gonna we're gonna we're gonna make it good.
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Speaker 1: I think yeah.
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Speaker 1: That I think I think that I think the episode the two of you
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Speaker 1: did together, for anyone who who tuned in, I think they should go back
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Speaker 1: and listen to that.
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Speaker 1: That'll be way it'll be way better than this one.
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Speaker 1: I'm I'm just trying to live up to that standard.
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Speaker 1: I think the two of you have some great chemistry, and I love the
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Speaker 1: format.
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Speaker 1: I think it's a good way to to change it up.
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Speaker 1: I think it brings a different kind of energy for you.
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Speaker 1: Makes it fun.
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Speaker 0: Yeah.
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Speaker 0: That's cool.
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Speaker 0: I I like it a lot too.
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Speaker 0: I'm really, really enjoying it.
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Speaker 0: So I just feel like I'm gonna keep doing them until I as Greg
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Speaker 0: Roon would say, the emotional charge is kind of drained out of it, and
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Speaker 0: then I'll think of something else.
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Speaker 1: I this wasn't a this wasn't a topic I had for you, but what
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Speaker 1: do you what do you what do you get out of it?
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Speaker 1: In the spirit of in the spirit of doing things that that energize
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Speaker 1: you, I mean, a podcast theoretically has some
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Speaker 1: intended value to it?
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Speaker 1: Not necessarily, like, a takeaway or but a, you know, a marketability
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Speaker 1: or a thing that maybe it's even just the entertainment.
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Speaker 1: Like, what is it that you hope people get from these episodes?
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Speaker 0: That is such a great question because I have no idea.
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Speaker 1: Nice.
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Speaker 0: I have no idea why anybody in the world would wanna listen to these
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Speaker 0: conversations except me and the person that recorded it and maybe the people in
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Speaker 0: our immediate circles.
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Speaker 0: And that is something that I've learned to just let go of.
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Speaker 0: Because the more I try to do something for other people, the the less
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Speaker 0: I enjoy it.
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Speaker 0: So I'm just really leaning into I'm loving these right now.
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Speaker 0: I I hope that people connect with something in
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Speaker 0: each of these episodes that they maybe take away, but I honestly
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Speaker 0: have no idea.
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Speaker 0: But I will tell you that so far, there are people that I've known
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Speaker 0: for a long time because I like I said, I think it does require
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Speaker 0: a little bit of kind of trust.
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Speaker 0: I can't imagine doing this with a stranger.
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Speaker 0: I have that seems even more terrifying.
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Speaker 0: But I
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Speaker 0: that conversation that Whitney and I had or that Alex and I had,
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Speaker 0: I don't think there are conversations that would ever happen
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Speaker 0: if we didn't just say, okay.
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Speaker 0: All I want you to do is give a little bit of forethought into
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Speaker 0: the couple of things you might wanna talk about.
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Speaker 0: Turn off all notifications, block out the outside world,
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Speaker 0: press record,
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Speaker 0: and see what happens.
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Speaker 0: And in every one so far,
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Speaker 0: we have come across things that I just can't imagine us ever talking about.
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Speaker 0: And they're not always deeply personal or just funny, but they're
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Speaker 0: really
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Speaker 0: I don't know.
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Speaker 0: There's a connection there.
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Speaker 0: And I just think if there's anything that other people might get
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Speaker 0: out of it, it's just that, oh, yeah.
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Speaker 0: This is what real conversations are supposed to feel like.
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Speaker 1: I like I like that.
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Speaker 1: I think that there I think that there is that ties to your deep
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Speaker 1: rooted passion for curiosity.
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Speaker 1: So I think it it totally met.
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Speaker 1: It totally fits.
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Speaker 0: It makes sense.
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Speaker 0: Now it's just a matter of time before one of these things goes horribly
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Speaker 0: wrong.
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Speaker 1: Oh, yeah.
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Speaker 1: I've got I've got questions about race and religion.
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Speaker 1: Yeah.
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Speaker 1: I want I'm gonna get all your political opinions on the record.
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Speaker 1: This is the one, Bob.
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Speaker 1: This is where it goes this is where it goes completely sideways, and you
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Speaker 1: get canceled.
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Speaker 1: Yeah.
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Speaker 1: Let's cancel let's cancel Bob, everybody.
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Speaker 0: Well so before we pressed record, you asked who goes first.
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Speaker 0: It's interesting.
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Speaker 0: I was thinking about that.
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Speaker 0: I guess I've always gone first because I thought that would make the guest
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Speaker 0: feel more at ease.
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Speaker 0: But as I think about it, I'm like, no.
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Speaker 0: Maybe that would be more stressful.
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Speaker 0: So I'll I'll just leave it to you.
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Speaker 0: Do you wanna would you rather ask a question, or would you rather be
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Speaker 0: asked
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Speaker 1: to get started?
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Speaker 1: I I asked you kind of it was kinda like
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Speaker 1: thinking that you would have the answer.
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Speaker 1: I didn't have
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Speaker 1: a bit apprehensive.
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Speaker 1: How about how about this?
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Speaker 1: I I do have I I came prepared with some topics, but I've been
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Speaker 1: very curious about what you're gonna bring.
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Speaker 1: And so Yeah.
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Speaker 1: How about this?
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Speaker 1: Why don't why don't you go first?
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Speaker 1: Yeah.
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Speaker 1: And then I'll see if I can I hope that that that'll help to
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Speaker 1: inform which one I go to in my list?
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Speaker 1: How about that?
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Speaker 0: Yeah.
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Speaker 0: For sure.
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Speaker 0: It's I've really struggled with this.
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Speaker 0: I have, I swear, like, ten of them on my list here.
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Speaker 0: Right.
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Speaker 0: But I just wanted to start with sort of a fun and easy one.
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Speaker 0: So we have always
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Speaker 0: bonded over music, and I wonder if there's
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Speaker 0: a song
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Speaker 0: that throws you back to another time and place.
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Speaker 0: And no matter how many times you listen to it, when you listen to
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Speaker 0: it, like, you can smell where you were when you when that
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Speaker 0: song first connected to it.
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Speaker 0: And
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Speaker 0: and when we just start there, what are the songs that are sort of
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Speaker 0: deeply rooted connected to different parts of your life that if you want to,
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Speaker 0: you can go back and be transported to those places?
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Speaker 0: Or maybe there are songs you're like, yeah.
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Speaker 0: I do not wanna listen to that song maybe ever again or just not
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Speaker 0: today.
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Speaker 1: Well, I love so great spot to start.
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Speaker 1: And for anyone who did listen to our first episode, and then they were
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Speaker 1: like, great.
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Speaker 1: I'm gonna have a weepy second episode with Greg Boyd and the growth growth
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Speaker 1: mixtape.
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Speaker 1: No.
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Speaker 1: I think this is a good place to start.
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Speaker 1: So
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Speaker 1: as you're asking, I immediately
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Speaker 1: snapped right back to,
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Speaker 1: one to one specific song.
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Speaker 1: And now, because I'm sharing this, I have to at least we're gonna get
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Speaker 1: twenty listens from all my family members, who are gonna Alright.
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Speaker 1: Who are gonna wanna hear hear Greg talk about this.
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Speaker 1: So when I was a when I was a kid, we went so my
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Speaker 1: my my parents are together.
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Speaker 1: So we got my mom and her side and a very close family and
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Speaker 1: my dad and his side.
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Speaker 1: And my mom's side, we would go to, a place on Georgian
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Speaker 1: Bay, Balm Beach.
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Speaker 1: And my grandfather would rent a cottage.
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Speaker 1: My grandparents would rent a cottage there.
00:10:18.220 --> 00:10:19.740
Speaker 1: We were always on the beach.
00:10:19.740 --> 00:10:23.740
Speaker 1: And we would I mean, it knows
00:10:23.820 --> 00:10:24.620
Speaker 1: Spotify.
00:10:24.620 --> 00:10:27.020
Speaker 1: I think I don't even know if there's a CD player.
00:10:27.020 --> 00:10:29.405
Speaker 1: So it's like a record player, maybe a tape.
00:10:29.405 --> 00:10:29.605
Speaker 1: Right?
00:10:29.565 --> 00:10:32.765
Speaker 1: It was, like, the only real music we had was the radio and whatever
00:10:32.765 --> 00:10:35.485
Speaker 1: tapes happened to be at this rented cottage.
00:10:35.485 --> 00:10:39.485
Speaker 1: And this is where my love for Billy Joel came from is
00:10:39.645 --> 00:10:43.645
Speaker 1: the song Piano Man was was one we would listen to almost every
00:10:43.760 --> 00:10:45.600
Speaker 1: night, at least my memory is.
00:10:45.600 --> 00:10:49.600
Speaker 1: Us as cousins sitting on the couch listening to Billy Joel,
00:10:50.000 --> 00:10:54.000
Speaker 1: Piano Man, and my cousin and uncles, you know
00:10:54.000 --> 00:10:58.000
Speaker 1: you know, just singing the lyrics, and the microphone smelled
00:10:58.325 --> 00:10:59.205
Speaker 1: like a beer.
00:10:59.205 --> 00:10:59.525
Speaker 1: Right?
00:10:59.525 --> 00:11:00.725
Speaker 1: Like, with such passion.
00:11:00.725 --> 00:11:03.205
Speaker 1: And then that just anchored it in my mind.
00:11:03.205 --> 00:11:07.205
Speaker 1: So no matter where I am, because I play and listen to that song
00:11:07.870 --> 00:11:10.590
Speaker 1: by the campfire myself and and we listen to it.
00:11:10.590 --> 00:11:13.470
Speaker 1: It's one of just one of my all time favorite songs that led to
00:11:13.470 --> 00:11:17.470
Speaker 1: the love of the song Vienna and now Vienna Waits that we named our
00:11:17.470 --> 00:11:20.205
Speaker 1: business after, all thanks to Billy Joel.
00:11:20.205 --> 00:11:20.845
Speaker 1: That is a song.
00:11:20.845 --> 00:11:24.365
Speaker 1: So when you're asking that question, that's the one that snaps me right back.
00:11:24.365 --> 00:11:26.285
Speaker 1: It's not it's not even a good memory.
00:11:26.285 --> 00:11:30.285
Speaker 1: It's not a it's just a core memory and takes me back to that
00:11:30.285 --> 00:11:34.285
Speaker 1: green cottage in Palm Beach, Ontario.
00:11:34.285 --> 00:11:38.285
Speaker 1: Just Midland, Palm Beach,
00:11:39.010 --> 00:11:41.410
Speaker 1: cousins, family, fun.
00:11:41.410 --> 00:11:42.130
Speaker 1: That is the one.
00:11:42.130 --> 00:11:46.130
Speaker 1: But I wanna give you one other one because
00:11:46.610 --> 00:11:49.865
Speaker 1: when you're asking the question, I think I'm gonna throw this back to you
00:11:49.865 --> 00:11:51.545
Speaker 1: because I'd like to hear your answer.
00:11:51.545 --> 00:11:55.545
Speaker 1: And then my head went in a slightly different direction because that's
00:11:55.705 --> 00:11:58.185
Speaker 1: a core memory that hasn't been changed.
00:11:58.185 --> 00:12:02.185
Speaker 1: But I have one now that is a core memory that has been changed.
00:12:02.540 --> 00:12:06.540
Speaker 1: So, the song Bob Kajun by the Tragically Hip is, you know, you
00:12:06.540 --> 00:12:08.220
Speaker 1: and I both love that song.
00:12:08.220 --> 00:12:12.220
Speaker 1: I've listened to that song for years and it can take me back to
00:12:12.380 --> 00:12:13.660
Speaker 1: all kinds of different places.
00:12:13.660 --> 00:12:17.660
Speaker 1: Camps and cottage and canoes and working the back
00:12:17.755 --> 00:12:20.795
Speaker 1: shop of my dad's bike store when I was a kid because we would
00:12:20.795 --> 00:12:22.475
Speaker 1: always listen to the hip.
00:12:22.475 --> 00:12:26.475
Speaker 1: But that song just got reframed for me
00:12:26.555 --> 00:12:27.755
Speaker 1: just a few weeks ago.
00:12:27.755 --> 00:12:31.650
Speaker 1: So, the now when I listen to Bob Cajun, all of that is gone.
00:12:31.650 --> 00:12:33.890
Speaker 1: The context is completely changed.
00:12:33.890 --> 00:12:36.530
Speaker 1: Because Whitney and I went to a show, It's a Good Life If You
00:12:36.530 --> 00:12:37.250
Speaker 1: Don't Weaken.
00:12:37.250 --> 00:12:38.370
Speaker 1: It's the name of the song.
00:12:38.370 --> 00:12:41.410
Speaker 1: Name of one of my favorite and, I'm sure, one of your favorite Tragically
00:12:41.410 --> 00:12:43.035
Speaker 1: Hip songs.
00:12:43.035 --> 00:12:46.235
Speaker 1: Jake Gold, who you had on your podcast, who I now need to talk
00:12:46.235 --> 00:12:50.235
Speaker 1: to, commissioned the creation of this musical,
00:12:50.235 --> 00:12:52.555
Speaker 1: which is the music of the Tragically Hip.
00:12:52.555 --> 00:12:56.530
Speaker 1: And it's set The story is set to
00:12:56.530 --> 00:12:58.850
Speaker 1: a immigrant Canadian story.
00:12:58.850 --> 00:13:02.850
Speaker 1: And there's this moment in the show where the main character, Waleed,
00:13:03.250 --> 00:13:05.410
Speaker 1: who's exiled from Iraq.
00:13:05.410 --> 00:13:08.930
Speaker 1: He's made his home in Canada where he fell in love with he falls
00:13:08.930 --> 00:13:12.930
Speaker 1: in love with a girl and he falls in love with Canada in Bobcaygeon.
00:13:13.605 --> 00:13:17.605
Speaker 1: He sings Bobcaygeon as an immigrant in the show with
00:13:17.845 --> 00:13:21.845
Speaker 1: the music in the background and it transformed the song for me
00:13:22.085 --> 00:13:26.085
Speaker 1: from campfire, bros, Beers, Molson
00:13:26.410 --> 00:13:30.410
Speaker 1: Canadian, to a song about falling in love
00:13:30.410 --> 00:13:32.490
Speaker 1: with Canada
00:13:32.490 --> 00:13:34.330
Speaker 1: for somebody coming from another place.
00:13:34.330 --> 00:13:37.850
Speaker 1: Now when I hear Bob Kajun for the past month and a half since
00:13:37.850 --> 00:13:41.785
Speaker 1: we went to the show, all I can think about is Waleed and the
00:13:41.785 --> 00:13:44.985
Speaker 1: writer of the show or one of the writers of the show, Ahmed, who
00:13:44.985 --> 00:13:48.825
Speaker 1: we had on our podcast a little while ago, who he himself fell in
00:13:48.825 --> 00:13:52.345
Speaker 1: love with Canada visiting Bob Kachen.
00:13:52.345 --> 00:13:54.200
Speaker 1: So I'll throw it back to you, Bob.
00:13:54.200 --> 00:13:55.240
Speaker 1: Those are mine.
00:13:55.240 --> 00:13:59.240
Speaker 1: Piano man takes me back to a place, and then Bob Kajun was one
00:13:59.320 --> 00:14:03.080
Speaker 1: that's always been a core memory, but it's totally been transformed.
00:14:03.080 --> 00:14:06.675
Speaker 1: And I wonder if that's happened for you.
00:14:06.675 --> 00:14:06.995
Speaker 0: Yes.
00:14:06.995 --> 00:14:07.555
Speaker 0: It has.
00:14:07.555 --> 00:14:10.195
Speaker 0: Before I get there
00:14:10.195 --> 00:14:12.275
Speaker 1: And you have to go to that show, by the way.
00:14:12.275 --> 00:14:12.835
Speaker 0: I know.
00:14:12.835 --> 00:14:14.115
Speaker 0: Well You you
00:14:14.115 --> 00:14:15.715
Speaker 1: I insist you must go.
00:14:15.715 --> 00:14:18.995
Speaker 1: And if if if not you, Woody and I will take you they're doing
00:14:18.995 --> 00:14:21.110
Speaker 1: a show in Kingston, Ontario.
00:14:21.110 --> 00:14:23.590
Speaker 1: This show is gonna be doing a run there in October.
00:14:23.590 --> 00:14:27.590
Speaker 1: We're almost definitely gonna go either to Kingston or Ottawa.
00:14:28.310 --> 00:14:32.310
Speaker 0: Because it's the tenth anniversary, I think, of the hip slash show in Kingston
00:14:32.390 --> 00:14:33.590
Speaker 0: right around now.
00:14:33.590 --> 00:14:34.630
Speaker 1: Oh, yeah.
00:14:34.630 --> 00:14:34.955
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:14:34.955 --> 00:14:35.155
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:14:35.035 --> 00:14:35.355
Speaker 1: That's right.
00:14:35.355 --> 00:14:38.235
Speaker 0: I think it's part of the celebrations that they're having.
00:14:38.235 --> 00:14:38.795
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:14:38.795 --> 00:14:39.755
Speaker 1: It's part of that.
00:14:39.755 --> 00:14:41.195
Speaker 0: Yeah.
00:14:41.195 --> 00:14:45.195
Speaker 0: It's interesting you say that because I've I think about the the way that
00:14:45.275 --> 00:14:49.275
Speaker 0: songs can anchor themselves to a point in our lives, And I've always thought
00:14:49.300 --> 00:14:53.300
Speaker 0: that if you can ever rewrite it, it would take repeated listens
00:14:53.700 --> 00:14:56.580
Speaker 0: to kind of rewire that association.
00:14:56.580 --> 00:14:59.380
Speaker 0: I'd never thought that you could have one moment that is so impactful that
00:14:59.380 --> 00:15:02.595
Speaker 0: it
00:15:02.595 --> 00:15:06.595
Speaker 0: completely changes what that song means, like, forever.
00:15:06.595 --> 00:15:06.995
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:15:06.995 --> 00:15:08.195
Speaker 1: I That's amazing.
00:15:08.195 --> 00:15:09.635
Speaker 1: It seems to be the case for me.
00:15:09.635 --> 00:15:12.275
Speaker 1: This this song is forever changed Yeah.
00:15:12.275 --> 00:15:12.595
Speaker 1: For me.
00:15:12.595 --> 00:15:13.235
Speaker 1: Bob Kitchin.
00:15:13.235 --> 00:15:14.010
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:15:14.010 --> 00:15:18.010
Speaker 0: The song that immediately comes to mind is Running to Stand Still
00:15:18.810 --> 00:15:20.090
Speaker 0: by U2.
00:15:20.090 --> 00:15:23.850
Speaker 0: I was deeply in a U2 stage back when I was in high school,
00:15:23.850 --> 00:15:27.210
Speaker 0: and I worked at a Kentucky fried chicken that was about a kilometer and
00:15:27.210 --> 00:15:29.135
Speaker 0: a half from my house.
00:15:29.135 --> 00:15:30.815
Speaker 0: And I would walk there.
00:15:30.815 --> 00:15:34.815
Speaker 0: And I remember walking in, like, blinding snowstorms with my Walkman
00:15:35.135 --> 00:15:36.495
Speaker 0: on
00:15:36.495 --> 00:15:37.055
Speaker 1: Walkman.
00:15:37.055 --> 00:15:39.615
Speaker 0: With a tape of,
00:15:39.615 --> 00:15:42.815
Speaker 0: what is that album?
00:15:42.815 --> 00:15:44.790
Speaker 0: Running to Stand Still.
00:15:44.790 --> 00:15:46.630
Speaker 0: Anyway,
00:15:46.630 --> 00:15:48.710
Speaker 0: I remember walking
00:15:48.710 --> 00:15:52.710
Speaker 0: and just listening to the that album over and over and
00:15:52.710 --> 00:15:53.750
Speaker 0: over again.
00:15:53.750 --> 00:15:57.510
Speaker 0: And then when I had kids, we would be at the cottage, and we
00:15:57.510 --> 00:15:59.965
Speaker 0: would take turns having to put them to sleep.
00:15:59.965 --> 00:16:02.685
Speaker 0: And
00:16:02.685 --> 00:16:06.685
Speaker 0: that song is the song that I would sing to my kids and
00:16:06.685 --> 00:16:10.445
Speaker 0: my niece and nephew as we're they're crowded into this little room in the
00:16:10.445 --> 00:16:12.125
Speaker 0: cottage, and I'm trying to get them to sleep.
00:16:12.125 --> 00:16:14.045
Speaker 0: Everybody else is still partying up by the camper.
00:16:14.045 --> 00:16:15.430
Speaker 0: I'm like, kids, time to go to sleep.
00:16:15.430 --> 00:16:17.190
Speaker 0: Settle the fuck down.
00:16:17.190 --> 00:16:17.590
Speaker 0: You know?
00:16:17.590 --> 00:16:20.310
Speaker 0: Daddy's gonna sing you a song, and I would just sing that song over
00:16:20.310 --> 00:16:21.270
Speaker 0: and over and over again.
00:16:21.270 --> 00:16:25.270
Speaker 0: And now I can't listen to that song without just thinking about,
00:16:25.270 --> 00:16:27.670
Speaker 0: you know, the kids being small and singing them to sleep.
00:16:27.670 --> 00:16:31.670
Speaker 0: So a similar definitely a similar thing to you, but it took
00:16:31.705 --> 00:16:35.705
Speaker 0: repeated repeated repeated singing in that new context
00:16:35.865 --> 00:16:37.145
Speaker 0: to change it.
00:16:37.145 --> 00:16:39.545
Speaker 1: That's, and the song's from Joshua Tree.
00:16:39.545 --> 00:16:39.865
Speaker 0: Yep.
00:16:39.865 --> 00:16:40.585
Speaker 0: That's right.
00:16:40.585 --> 00:16:43.440
Speaker 1: But the, great album too.
00:16:43.440 --> 00:16:45.600
Speaker 1: But the that's interesting.
00:16:45.600 --> 00:16:49.600
Speaker 1: So for you, it's repeated exposure changed it.
00:16:50.480 --> 00:16:53.760
Speaker 1: Whereas for me, I think it's just how profound is the experience.
00:16:53.760 --> 00:16:54.880
Speaker 1: I was yeah.
00:16:54.880 --> 00:16:58.880
Speaker 1: I was moved to tears from the one just the the mind
00:16:59.055 --> 00:17:03.055
Speaker 1: blowing context shift of a song and the
00:17:03.135 --> 00:17:07.135
Speaker 1: beauty that they created in the like, it was, like, back to me.
00:17:07.375 --> 00:17:09.775
Speaker 1: So it's probably the intensity of the experience too.
00:17:09.775 --> 00:17:13.775
Speaker 1: There's no real positive memory that comes from
00:17:14.010 --> 00:17:17.130
Speaker 1: putting your kids to sleep one time, I would say.
00:17:17.130 --> 00:17:19.530
Speaker 1: Because sometimes it's great and sometimes it's bad.
00:17:19.530 --> 00:17:22.250
Speaker 1: Maybe they look up at you and say something and then bang, you know,
00:17:22.250 --> 00:17:22.810
Speaker 1: it hits.
00:17:22.810 --> 00:17:23.130
Speaker 0: Yeah.
00:17:23.130 --> 00:17:23.330
Speaker 0: I
00:17:23.290 --> 00:17:24.570
Speaker 1: would agree with that.
00:17:24.570 --> 00:17:25.290
Speaker 1: That's beautiful.
00:17:25.290 --> 00:17:29.265
Speaker 0: It's before we leave that, it's funny,
00:17:29.265 --> 00:17:32.065
Speaker 0: that you
00:17:32.065 --> 00:17:36.065
Speaker 0: mention kind of music, and playlist because
00:17:36.305 --> 00:17:40.065
Speaker 0: you and Whitney created a playlist called the Vienna Waits playlist that I still
00:17:40.065 --> 00:17:41.540
Speaker 0: listen to often.
00:17:41.540 --> 00:17:42.660
Speaker 0: Every once in a while, I'll text you.
00:17:42.660 --> 00:17:43.460
Speaker 0: I'm like, oh my god.
00:17:43.460 --> 00:17:44.420
Speaker 0: I listened to this song.
00:17:44.420 --> 00:17:46.740
Speaker 0: It made me cry on my bike ride, etcetera.
00:17:46.740 --> 00:17:49.860
Speaker 0: But I what I like most about that is that I every time I
00:17:49.860 --> 00:17:52.820
Speaker 0: listen, I'm like, is this a Whitney song or a Greg song?
00:17:52.820 --> 00:17:56.820
Speaker 0: And you can actually tell on Spotify, assuming that you didn't come up
00:17:56.965 --> 00:17:59.445
Speaker 0: with a list and then grit Whitney just uploaded them all.
00:17:59.445 --> 00:18:02.965
Speaker 0: You can say it shows Greg Whitney Greg Whitney.
00:18:02.965 --> 00:18:03.525
Speaker 1: Yep.
00:18:03.525 --> 00:18:05.205
Speaker 0: But it you can also sort.
00:18:05.205 --> 00:18:07.285
Speaker 0: I was really interested.
00:18:07.285 --> 00:18:11.260
Speaker 0: You can sort by recently added, which is the the order that you would
00:18:11.260 --> 00:18:11.820
Speaker 0: have put them in.
00:18:11.820 --> 00:18:15.820
Speaker 0: And I was wondering when they decided to create a playlist, what is the
00:18:15.820 --> 00:18:19.500
Speaker 0: what is the first song they both knew would have to go on it?
00:18:19.500 --> 00:18:22.380
Speaker 0: Now in your case, it's pretty easy.
00:18:22.380 --> 00:18:25.055
Speaker 0: Vienna is the number is the first song on there.
00:18:25.055 --> 00:18:28.415
Speaker 0: But Piano Man, I think, is, like, one of the next it's in the
00:18:28.415 --> 00:18:29.295
Speaker 0: top five.
00:18:29.295 --> 00:18:31.855
Speaker 0: It's a good life if you don't weaken, which you mentioned is in the
00:18:31.855 --> 00:18:32.735
Speaker 0: top five.
00:18:32.735 --> 00:18:32.975
Speaker 0: Yeah.
00:18:32.975 --> 00:18:34.575
Speaker 0: So it's actually really hilarious.
00:18:34.575 --> 00:18:38.015
Speaker 0: And now you might not have noticed, it's a good life is actually on
00:18:38.015 --> 00:18:40.770
Speaker 0: there twice because Whitney has added
00:18:40.770 --> 00:18:41.010
Speaker 1: it.
00:18:41.010 --> 00:18:41.730
Speaker 1: It should be.
00:18:41.730 --> 00:18:42.130
Speaker 0: Yeah.
00:18:42.130 --> 00:18:44.450
Speaker 0: Because it's been so long that she's added it.
00:18:44.450 --> 00:18:48.450
Speaker 0: She's added it again probably in response to that play that you saw.
00:18:48.530 --> 00:18:48.850
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:18:48.850 --> 00:18:49.170
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:18:49.170 --> 00:18:49.970
Speaker 1: That's probably right.
00:18:49.970 --> 00:18:52.995
Speaker 1: And we actually went through a period of time,
00:18:52.995 --> 00:18:56.995
Speaker 1: you you might recall in the program where we we would have people
00:18:57.395 --> 00:19:00.355
Speaker 1: share their favorite song, and we would add people's favorite songs to it.
00:19:00.355 --> 00:19:04.355
Speaker 1: So that also meant that we got other people's
00:19:04.675 --> 00:19:07.395
Speaker 1: additions onto the list, which is kind of kind of a cool feature of
00:19:07.395 --> 00:19:08.900
Speaker 1: that too.
00:19:08.900 --> 00:19:09.100
Speaker 0: Yeah.
00:19:09.060 --> 00:19:10.820
Speaker 0: Well, it's a mix tape.
00:19:10.820 --> 00:19:11.380
Speaker 1: It's a mix tape.
00:19:11.380 --> 00:19:12.020
Speaker 1: So there you go.
00:19:12.020 --> 00:19:12.420
Speaker 1: There you go.
00:19:12.420 --> 00:19:12.620
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:19:12.580 --> 00:19:14.260
Speaker 1: I think you might need to do one of those, Bob.
00:19:14.260 --> 00:19:17.540
Speaker 1: We I would love to I'd love to tune into a a growth mix
00:19:17.540 --> 00:19:20.100
Speaker 1: tape mix tape playlist.
00:19:20.100 --> 00:19:21.460
Speaker 1: That'd be kinda meta.
00:19:21.460 --> 00:19:24.565
Speaker 0: How fucked up is it that that's never occurred to me
00:19:24.565 --> 00:19:25.045
Speaker 1: Hey.
00:19:25.045 --> 00:19:25.685
Speaker 0: Until now.
00:19:25.685 --> 00:19:27.525
Speaker 0: That is a freaking awesome idea.
00:19:27.525 --> 00:19:30.325
Speaker 1: I'm starting to get a better sense for really why you do this.
00:19:30.325 --> 00:19:31.765
Speaker 1: It's a brainstorming session.
00:19:31.765 --> 00:19:32.565
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:19:32.565 --> 00:19:33.365
Speaker 1: You've taken it.
00:19:33.365 --> 00:19:33.925
Speaker 1: Yes.
00:19:33.925 --> 00:19:36.885
Speaker 1: You get you get clever people on here that can give give an idea
00:19:36.885 --> 00:19:37.085
Speaker 1: too.
00:19:37.045 --> 00:19:38.485
Speaker 1: So I I think we're done here.
00:19:38.485 --> 00:19:40.860
Speaker 1: I think that's the most value I can bring is
00:19:40.860 --> 00:19:41.740
Speaker 0: I love it.
00:19:41.740 --> 00:19:41.940
Speaker 1: I
00:19:41.900 --> 00:19:42.140
Speaker 0: love it.
00:19:42.140 --> 00:19:45.020
Speaker 0: And you it's funny when you I had you you're right.
00:19:45.020 --> 00:19:49.020
Speaker 0: We our verse our first, conversation was very powerful telling your
00:19:49.100 --> 00:19:49.500
Speaker 0: story.
00:19:49.500 --> 00:19:50.860
Speaker 0: There's a lot of tears.
00:19:50.860 --> 00:19:54.380
Speaker 0: I was like, this first question that I asked, Greg, feels like it's gonna
00:19:54.380 --> 00:19:54.860
Speaker 0: set the tone.
00:19:54.860 --> 00:19:55.820
Speaker 0: Are we going back there?
00:19:55.820 --> 00:19:58.515
Speaker 0: Is this gonna be we're gonna be sobbing through the next forty five minutes,
00:19:58.515 --> 00:20:01.475
Speaker 0: or are you gonna try to lighten things up a bit?
00:20:01.475 --> 00:20:04.515
Speaker 0: So I I had other things on here that easily could have taken us
00:20:04.515 --> 00:20:05.715
Speaker 0: right back to where we started.
00:20:05.715 --> 00:20:06.435
Speaker 1: Hey.
00:20:06.435 --> 00:20:07.315
Speaker 1: I'm I'm here for it.
00:20:07.315 --> 00:20:09.075
Speaker 1: I'm I'm here to go whatever whatever direction.
00:20:09.075 --> 00:20:10.115
Speaker 1: It's a beautiful day outside.
00:20:10.115 --> 00:20:13.930
Speaker 1: We can go for a walk after, just to to regroup.
00:20:13.930 --> 00:20:14.490
Speaker 1: How about this?
00:20:14.490 --> 00:20:17.610
Speaker 1: I'll I'll take I'll take over here, and I'll hit you with one.
00:20:17.610 --> 00:20:20.650
Speaker 1: And this is the first question
00:20:20.650 --> 00:20:24.650
Speaker 1: that I as soon as we as soon as we were talking about
00:20:24.905 --> 00:20:28.905
Speaker 1: about this, I was I wanted to ask, I wanted to ask this question.
00:20:28.985 --> 00:20:32.985
Speaker 1: And so, I'm gonna give a bit of context to the question too.
00:20:33.705 --> 00:20:37.225
Speaker 1: People who listen to your your podcast would know you've you're the father of
00:20:37.225 --> 00:20:39.050
Speaker 1: two sons.
00:20:39.050 --> 00:20:40.970
Speaker 1: They're, I think they're both in their twenties now.
00:20:40.970 --> 00:20:41.210
Speaker 1: Right?
00:20:41.210 --> 00:20:42.410
Speaker 1: They're both going to their.
00:20:42.410 --> 00:20:42.730
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:20:42.730 --> 00:20:44.330
Speaker 1: So, okay.
00:20:44.330 --> 00:20:45.850
Speaker 1: So, Bob, here's the question for you.
00:20:45.850 --> 00:20:47.450
Speaker 1: I want your opinion on this.
00:20:47.450 --> 00:20:47.770
Speaker 1: Right?
00:20:47.770 --> 00:20:49.530
Speaker 1: This is this is your explain.
00:20:49.530 --> 00:20:53.395
Speaker 1: Why do men in general suck?
00:20:53.395 --> 00:20:55.555
Speaker 1: And I wanna be a little bit more specific here.
00:20:55.555 --> 00:20:58.595
Speaker 1: And what I'm because, like, women suck too.
00:20:58.595 --> 00:21:02.595
Speaker 1: But I mean, when you hear about in the news, car
00:21:02.675 --> 00:21:06.675
Speaker 1: drives into group of people, or
00:21:06.820 --> 00:21:10.260
Speaker 1: terrible thing happens in this place.
00:21:10.260 --> 00:21:14.260
Speaker 1: Do you what do we default think is the gender of that
00:21:15.060 --> 00:21:17.300
Speaker 1: person who did this just shitty thing.
00:21:17.300 --> 00:21:17.620
Speaker 1: Right?
00:21:17.620 --> 00:21:20.340
Speaker 1: It's like and and we're almost always right in that.
00:21:20.340 --> 00:21:24.340
Speaker 1: And it's like this idea of that and then in small ways too,
00:21:24.995 --> 00:21:28.995
Speaker 1: that I think dudes often, and in many ways, just suck.
00:21:29.235 --> 00:21:33.235
Speaker 1: So as the dad of two young men for you, and then I'm
00:21:33.395 --> 00:21:37.395
Speaker 1: the father of of three young men.
00:21:38.470 --> 00:21:42.390
Speaker 1: Like, I get to parent these these guys and
00:21:42.390 --> 00:21:43.830
Speaker 1: try to make them not suck.
00:21:43.830 --> 00:21:46.310
Speaker 1: But I I think men in general do.
00:21:46.310 --> 00:21:50.230
Speaker 1: So why do you, Bob, why do you think men in general suck?
00:21:50.230 --> 00:21:52.775
Speaker 1: And this isn't a beat up on white guys moment.
00:21:52.775 --> 00:21:56.775
Speaker 1: This is, like, let's acknowledge that when you hear
00:21:56.775 --> 00:22:00.775
Speaker 1: about a bad thing, it's usually just a just a
00:22:00.935 --> 00:22:03.220
Speaker 1: bad decision that's been made by by a dude.
00:22:03.220 --> 00:22:03.940
Speaker 1: So hit me.
00:22:03.940 --> 00:22:07.940
Speaker 1: That was the question I wanna hit you with.
00:22:08.500 --> 00:22:09.380
Speaker 0: What yeah.
00:22:09.380 --> 00:22:13.380
Speaker 0: I mean, I guess the question that immediately comes up is,
00:22:15.265 --> 00:22:19.265
Speaker 0: are we just hardwired to suck,
00:22:19.825 --> 00:22:23.105
Speaker 0: or are we raised to suck?
00:22:23.105 --> 00:22:25.985
Speaker 0: And the answer to both is both.
00:22:25.985 --> 00:22:26.305
Speaker 0: Sure.
00:22:26.305 --> 00:22:27.265
Speaker 0: It's gotta be both.
00:22:27.265 --> 00:22:29.940
Speaker 0: It's always a both,
00:22:29.940 --> 00:22:33.460
Speaker 0: in which case, us as we're raising
00:22:33.460 --> 00:22:37.460
Speaker 0: young men can only do so much if you believe that
00:22:37.700 --> 00:22:40.500
Speaker 0: there is a hardwiring to the fact that we kinda suck.
00:22:40.500 --> 00:22:43.220
Speaker 0: We're predisposed to violence,
00:22:43.220 --> 00:22:47.015
Speaker 0: competition, other things that kind of may be at the root of why we
00:22:47.015 --> 00:22:50.455
Speaker 0: suck.
00:22:50.455 --> 00:22:53.735
Speaker 1: I don't
00:22:53.735 --> 00:22:57.735
Speaker 0: I think
00:22:58.680 --> 00:23:00.520
Speaker 0: I wonder if it comes down question
00:23:00.520 --> 00:23:01.240
Speaker 1: the question too.
00:23:01.240 --> 00:23:02.840
Speaker 1: You're allowed to question the question immediately.
00:23:02.840 --> 00:23:03.960
Speaker 1: Really, Boyd?
00:23:03.960 --> 00:23:04.160
Speaker 1: Do
00:23:04.040 --> 00:23:04.520
Speaker 0: you No.
00:23:04.520 --> 00:23:07.480
Speaker 0: I do like the question.
00:23:07.480 --> 00:23:10.520
Speaker 0: I
00:23:10.520 --> 00:23:14.325
Speaker 0: I just think it comes down to
00:23:14.325 --> 00:23:18.325
Speaker 0: it's gotta come if we separate the nurture and nature, right, and
00:23:18.405 --> 00:23:20.725
Speaker 0: we I don't know the nature side of that.
00:23:20.725 --> 00:23:23.765
Speaker 0: I'm sure there are very good reasons why we are kind of predisposed to
00:23:23.765 --> 00:23:25.845
Speaker 0: be shitty to each other.
00:23:25.845 --> 00:23:28.965
Speaker 0: But on the nurture side, which is the part that we can control
00:23:28.965 --> 00:23:29.288
Speaker 1: Mhmm.
00:23:29.288 --> 00:23:33.130
Speaker 0: I wonder if it just comes down to
00:23:33.130 --> 00:23:35.610
Speaker 0: a lack of
00:23:35.610 --> 00:23:39.450
Speaker 0: role models.
00:23:39.450 --> 00:23:42.735
Speaker 0: And people that modeling the kind of yeah.
00:23:42.735 --> 00:23:45.375
Speaker 0: The the Modeling the kind of behaviors.
00:23:45.375 --> 00:23:45.575
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:23:45.535 --> 00:23:45.935
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:23:45.935 --> 00:23:46.655
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:23:46.655 --> 00:23:48.735
Speaker 1: I was I was about to say we're going down the path of Bob
00:23:48.735 --> 00:23:52.735
Speaker 1: Mathers getting canceled, that we need more success white male success
00:23:52.895 --> 00:23:55.540
Speaker 1: stories out in the world, to
00:23:55.540 --> 00:23:56.660
Speaker 1: to maul ourselves off of.
00:23:56.660 --> 00:23:59.220
Speaker 1: But I I know that's not what you meant, but I had to I
00:23:59.220 --> 00:23:59.940
Speaker 1: had to voice
00:23:59.940 --> 00:24:00.260
Speaker 0: Right.
00:24:00.260 --> 00:24:00.740
Speaker 0: Funny.
00:24:00.740 --> 00:24:00.940
Speaker 0: No.
00:24:00.820 --> 00:24:01.540
Speaker 0: It's not what I meant.
00:24:01.540 --> 00:24:05.540
Speaker 0: I guess it's just about,
00:24:07.300 --> 00:24:10.435
Speaker 0: modeling
00:24:10.435 --> 00:24:14.435
Speaker 0: the, you know, the kinds of men that are less shitty
00:24:14.515 --> 00:24:17.315
Speaker 0: that we want our kids to be.
00:24:17.315 --> 00:24:20.515
Speaker 0: It's funny that I and I think Whitney and I talked about this.
00:24:20.515 --> 00:24:23.800
Speaker 0: One of the questions that I asked Whitney,
00:24:23.800 --> 00:24:27.560
Speaker 0: your wife, when she was on is when is the last time you told
00:24:27.560 --> 00:24:30.120
Speaker 0: somebody you love them?
00:24:30.120 --> 00:24:32.120
Speaker 0: And she said, well, I told Cole this morning.
00:24:32.120 --> 00:24:35.320
Speaker 0: And I said, this wasn't a question I was planning on asking you today,
00:24:35.320 --> 00:24:38.185
Speaker 0: but that's just an example of I grew up.
00:24:38.185 --> 00:24:41.065
Speaker 0: My dad didn't say it often or at least I don't remember him saying
00:24:41.065 --> 00:24:41.545
Speaker 0: it.
00:24:41.545 --> 00:24:45.305
Speaker 0: And now even I don't tell my kids as often as I should, and
00:24:45.305 --> 00:24:48.265
Speaker 0: I never imagined that I would grow up to be a man that didn't
00:24:48.265 --> 00:24:52.265
Speaker 0: tell his kids he loved them every chance that he got, but I don't.
00:24:54.560 --> 00:24:58.560
Speaker 0: And I just think it's, you know, maybe a small example of
00:25:00.240 --> 00:25:04.240
Speaker 0: the way that this gets kinda passed down from generation to generation.
00:25:04.400 --> 00:25:07.120
Speaker 0: I wanna be a better dad than my dad was.
00:25:07.120 --> 00:25:09.705
Speaker 0: My dad was a good dad in in most ways, but I wanna be
00:25:09.705 --> 00:25:13.705
Speaker 0: better than him, and my kids wanna be better than them.
00:25:13.945 --> 00:25:17.945
Speaker 0: But we all sort of carry so much of
00:25:18.345 --> 00:25:22.345
Speaker 0: that behavior with us, and it's a lot harder to change
00:25:22.640 --> 00:25:23.280
Speaker 0: than we think.
00:25:23.280 --> 00:25:26.960
Speaker 0: So coming back to why do we suck,
00:25:26.960 --> 00:25:30.640
Speaker 0: I think it takes generations
00:25:30.640 --> 00:25:32.960
Speaker 0: for this kind of change to happen.
00:25:32.960 --> 00:25:33.360
Speaker 0: I don't know.
00:25:33.360 --> 00:25:36.785
Speaker 0: What are your thoughts on it?
00:25:36.785 --> 00:25:40.785
Speaker 1: I like the separation of nature versus nurture because I
00:25:40.865 --> 00:25:43.825
Speaker 1: I think
00:25:43.825 --> 00:25:47.265
Speaker 1: not to get all I I did some philosophy in university and so I
00:25:47.265 --> 00:25:51.265
Speaker 1: had this very Hobbesian look at the world, which is we're all we're all
00:25:51.400 --> 00:25:55.400
Speaker 1: just in our core being male, female,
00:25:55.480 --> 00:25:56.520
Speaker 1: whatever.
00:25:56.520 --> 00:26:00.520
Speaker 1: Your whatever whoever and whatever you are and wherever you are, we're
00:26:00.680 --> 00:26:02.600
Speaker 1: all hardwired to be bad.
00:26:02.600 --> 00:26:06.485
Speaker 1: It was kinda my to my parents dismay, that was my the the way
00:26:06.485 --> 00:26:09.525
Speaker 1: I started to to think of things.
00:26:09.525 --> 00:26:13.525
Speaker 1: So I like the idea of separating it out to to then
00:26:13.765 --> 00:26:15.605
Speaker 1: the nurture piece.
00:26:15.605 --> 00:26:17.445
Speaker 1: I would I would side with you.
00:26:17.445 --> 00:26:19.640
Speaker 1: I think
00:26:19.640 --> 00:26:21.080
Speaker 1: I am of the opinion.
00:26:21.080 --> 00:26:23.000
Speaker 1: The bar is really low.
00:26:23.000 --> 00:26:26.920
Speaker 1: I've always joked that the bar is really low for me as a dad.
00:26:26.920 --> 00:26:30.680
Speaker 1: And the bar is really low for me as a husband to be good.
00:26:30.680 --> 00:26:31.880
Speaker 1: Like, what is a good husband?
00:26:31.880 --> 00:26:33.475
Speaker 1: What is a good dad?
00:26:33.475 --> 00:26:34.995
Speaker 1: Feels like a low bar.
00:26:34.995 --> 00:26:37.315
Speaker 1: And so, I think that lines up a little bit with with with what
00:26:37.315 --> 00:26:38.675
Speaker 1: you're saying.
00:26:38.675 --> 00:26:41.715
Speaker 1: I think that I'm a great dad and I think I'm a great friend
00:26:41.715 --> 00:26:43.555
Speaker 1: and I think I'm a great husband.
00:26:43.555 --> 00:26:45.650
Speaker 1: All those things.
00:26:45.650 --> 00:26:49.570
Speaker 1: But is it because I'm objectively great or is it because the bar is
00:26:49.570 --> 00:26:52.690
Speaker 1: really low and I exceed that low bar?
00:26:52.690 --> 00:26:54.290
Speaker 1: Probably a little bit of both.
00:26:54.290 --> 00:26:56.290
Speaker 1: So, I think
00:26:56.290 --> 00:27:00.290
Speaker 1: the the answer that I had in my thinking about why do men
00:27:00.465 --> 00:27:04.145
Speaker 1: generally suck was
00:27:04.145 --> 00:27:08.145
Speaker 1: I have this sense that men are deeply insecure, generally, and
00:27:08.145 --> 00:27:10.465
Speaker 1: don't know what to do about it.
00:27:10.465 --> 00:27:14.465
Speaker 1: And they're not and they're not, you know, we
00:27:14.510 --> 00:27:18.270
Speaker 1: men generally don't Like, that that is not a thing you're allowed to be,
00:27:18.270 --> 00:27:22.270
Speaker 1: which feels like an an a nurture thing for sure.
00:27:22.270 --> 00:27:26.270
Speaker 1: And I think that everybody is insecure, generally.
00:27:27.185 --> 00:27:29.505
Speaker 1: And then I think
00:27:29.505 --> 00:27:31.745
Speaker 1: being
00:27:31.745 --> 00:27:35.745
Speaker 1: in an environment where that's almost not allowed makes it makes you do
00:27:36.065 --> 00:27:38.385
Speaker 1: just terrible things or or hide that.
00:27:38.385 --> 00:27:42.370
Speaker 1: I think of a lot of men that are those role models, going back
00:27:42.370 --> 00:27:45.010
Speaker 1: to how I was joking about you getting canceled before.
00:27:45.010 --> 00:27:49.010
Speaker 1: A lot of really successful people are insecure just like everybody
00:27:49.170 --> 00:27:50.370
Speaker 1: else.
00:27:50.370 --> 00:27:52.530
Speaker 1: They channel that energy into something else.
00:27:52.530 --> 00:27:56.445
Speaker 1: And even after achieving success, a lot of successful people, it turns out, are
00:27:56.445 --> 00:28:00.285
Speaker 1: deeply insecure just, again, like everybody else.
00:28:00.285 --> 00:28:03.245
Speaker 1: It doesn't make them a good person or a successful person.
00:28:03.245 --> 00:28:07.245
Speaker 1: Generally, it makes them successful financially or economically, but not like a good
00:28:07.405 --> 00:28:08.125
Speaker 1: person.
00:28:08.125 --> 00:28:12.125
Speaker 1: And so I think a lot of the models we have
00:28:12.150 --> 00:28:15.830
Speaker 1: as men are of masking your insecurity with achievement.
00:28:15.830 --> 00:28:19.750
Speaker 1: And then that leads to all kinds of
00:28:19.750 --> 00:28:22.975
Speaker 1: really bad outcomes.
00:28:22.975 --> 00:28:25.775
Speaker 1: So I I like the role model piece.
00:28:25.775 --> 00:28:29.615
Speaker 1: I like the nature versus nurture separation.
00:28:29.615 --> 00:28:32.895
Speaker 1: Because I I I do think, I mean, everybody sucks to some degree.
00:28:32.895 --> 00:28:34.415
Speaker 1: Like, everybody has a bit of that in them.
00:28:34.415 --> 00:28:38.415
Speaker 1: But I just have this overwhelming feeling that I just want my kids,
00:28:38.630 --> 00:28:42.630
Speaker 1: the the young men that I have the opportunity to to raise to
00:28:42.870 --> 00:28:43.590
Speaker 1: not suck.
00:28:43.590 --> 00:28:47.590
Speaker 1: And when I thought about this, it felt like I just wanna make them
00:28:48.150 --> 00:28:51.590
Speaker 1: know that it's okay to feel insecure, but also give them a deeper sense
00:28:51.590 --> 00:28:55.590
Speaker 1: of security by just being super real with them and telling them that
00:28:55.685 --> 00:28:59.685
Speaker 1: I get scared too and having real conversations or, like, you do telling them
00:28:59.765 --> 00:29:01.205
Speaker 1: that, that you love them.
00:29:01.205 --> 00:29:04.805
Speaker 1: I struggle with that too, by the way, just saying I love you.
00:29:04.805 --> 00:29:07.925
Speaker 1: I don't think I say that to very many people.
00:29:07.925 --> 00:29:08.565
Speaker 1: So that's the thing.
00:29:08.565 --> 00:29:11.610
Speaker 1: But, But, anyway, that's a that I I like I like I like your
00:29:11.610 --> 00:29:12.970
Speaker 1: perspective on it.
00:29:12.970 --> 00:29:14.570
Speaker 0: I love the question.
00:29:14.570 --> 00:29:15.450
Speaker 0: I'll never forget.
00:29:15.450 --> 00:29:18.810
Speaker 0: I don't know where I heard it from when you talk about the bar
00:29:18.810 --> 00:29:20.010
Speaker 0: being low for dads.
00:29:20.010 --> 00:29:24.010
Speaker 0: I remember there being a saying something around something like
00:29:24.945 --> 00:29:28.065
Speaker 0: eighty percent of being a good dad is just showing up.
00:29:28.065 --> 00:29:31.425
Speaker 0: And there were times when I was like, you know, I wasn't feeling like
00:29:31.425 --> 00:29:31.905
Speaker 0: the best dad.
00:29:31.905 --> 00:29:33.185
Speaker 0: I was like, well, I showed up today.
00:29:33.185 --> 00:29:34.865
Speaker 0: I guess that I guess I did a pretty good job.
00:29:34.865 --> 00:29:37.860
Speaker 0: It's like, I don't think anybody ever told a mom, hey.
00:29:37.860 --> 00:29:41.380
Speaker 0: Just eighty percent is just of being a good mom is showing up.
00:29:41.380 --> 00:29:41.860
Speaker 0: It's like, no.
00:29:41.860 --> 00:29:43.940
Speaker 0: The bar is much higher
00:29:43.940 --> 00:29:44.820
Speaker 1: for moms.
00:29:44.820 --> 00:29:45.300
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:29:45.300 --> 00:29:46.260
Speaker 1: Way higher.
00:29:46.260 --> 00:29:50.260
Speaker 1: Whitney is a she's a step parent to or stepmother to to these three
00:29:50.340 --> 00:29:52.180
Speaker 1: kids, but she's a full time mom.
00:29:52.180 --> 00:29:56.180
Speaker 1: Like, our, like, she she is the she is their
00:29:56.285 --> 00:29:57.325
Speaker 1: mom, their their mother.
00:29:57.325 --> 00:29:57.885
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:29:57.885 --> 00:29:59.565
Speaker 1: And,
00:29:59.565 --> 00:30:01.805
Speaker 1: and she's taken that on.
00:30:01.805 --> 00:30:05.005
Speaker 1: And almost, like,
00:30:05.005 --> 00:30:08.890
Speaker 1: as good as a and as engaged as a dad as I am, I
00:30:08.890 --> 00:30:12.890
Speaker 1: don't carry half the things in my head because I'm just not expected to.
00:30:12.970 --> 00:30:13.610
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:30:13.610 --> 00:30:14.650
Speaker 1: And I I just don't know.
00:30:14.650 --> 00:30:16.410
Speaker 1: We call it the invisible load.
00:30:16.410 --> 00:30:20.410
Speaker 1: And if the kids show up for school on time, it's
00:30:20.410 --> 00:30:21.530
Speaker 1: like, high five, dad.
00:30:21.530 --> 00:30:25.455
Speaker 1: But for moms, it's like, it is generally and I don't think this is
00:30:25.455 --> 00:30:27.935
Speaker 1: right, but it's like, well, do they have any nutritious lunch?
00:30:27.935 --> 00:30:29.295
Speaker 1: Do they have good clothes to wear?
00:30:29.295 --> 00:30:31.135
Speaker 1: Is the clothes clean or is their hair dress?
00:30:31.135 --> 00:30:33.135
Speaker 1: Like, these are all things that they get carried.
00:30:33.135 --> 00:30:34.580
Speaker 1: And I think that that is cultural.
00:30:34.580 --> 00:30:37.300
Speaker 1: So anyway, we can move off of this one, but I I I just
00:30:37.300 --> 00:30:39.940
Speaker 1: had I had a feeling that you as a as a father of two
00:30:39.940 --> 00:30:43.060
Speaker 1: young men might have a perspective and and a point of view on it.
00:30:43.060 --> 00:30:43.540
Speaker 1: I like it.
00:30:43.540 --> 00:30:43.740
Speaker 0: Yeah.
00:30:43.700 --> 00:30:46.340
Speaker 0: I have a lot of lot more to say on this.
00:30:46.340 --> 00:30:50.095
Speaker 0: But one thing one last thing before we leave, though, it's it the other
00:30:50.095 --> 00:30:54.095
Speaker 0: thing is that I do look at my kids, and they are kinder
00:30:54.335 --> 00:30:57.215
Speaker 0: and more empathetic than I was at their age.
00:30:57.215 --> 00:30:58.815
Speaker 0: And so I do have a lot of hope.
00:30:58.815 --> 00:31:02.750
Speaker 0: I attribute almost all of that to my wife.
00:31:02.750 --> 00:31:06.270
Speaker 0: I mean, maybe she would say I'm a part of that too, but I
00:31:06.270 --> 00:31:10.270
Speaker 0: do think she's just encoded,
00:31:10.990 --> 00:31:12.750
Speaker 0: to have
00:31:12.750 --> 00:31:14.190
Speaker 0: for that emotional intelligence.
00:31:14.190 --> 00:31:17.485
Speaker 0: And I think a lot of that a lot of that, the best parts
00:31:17.485 --> 00:31:20.685
Speaker 0: of them come from her.
00:31:20.685 --> 00:31:23.805
Speaker 0: Because some sometimes I'll tell them a story, you know, when I'm telling them
00:31:23.805 --> 00:31:26.765
Speaker 0: something that I did back when I was their age, you know, partying, and
00:31:26.765 --> 00:31:30.765
Speaker 0: I swear they just look at me like, that is fucked up.
00:31:30.830 --> 00:31:31.950
Speaker 1: It's fucking weird enough.
00:31:31.950 --> 00:31:32.910
Speaker 1: I know.
00:31:32.910 --> 00:31:35.710
Speaker 1: But, actually so I'm gonna I'm gonna push back a little bit on this
00:31:35.710 --> 00:31:39.710
Speaker 1: one point, before we leave it because I actually think
00:31:39.870 --> 00:31:43.705
Speaker 1: even if the credit goes to Jill or the credit goes to Whitney or
00:31:43.705 --> 00:31:47.625
Speaker 1: the credit goes to whoever the partner is, I think as a dad, I
00:31:47.625 --> 00:31:51.625
Speaker 1: think it's important for you to own, hey, you know,
00:31:52.025 --> 00:31:56.025
Speaker 1: I to say all the good attributes they got from, I think,
00:31:57.140 --> 00:31:59.860
Speaker 1: perpetuates the problem that you said of not having good role models.
00:31:59.860 --> 00:32:00.100
Speaker 1: Mhmm.
00:32:00.100 --> 00:32:04.100
Speaker 1: I actually would love for you and I to own, hey, kindness is important,
00:32:04.580 --> 00:32:07.780
Speaker 1: and I'm gonna role model for you being kind, and you got that from
00:32:07.780 --> 00:32:08.740
Speaker 1: from both of us.
00:32:08.740 --> 00:32:10.315
Speaker 1: Whether they believe it or not.
00:32:10.315 --> 00:32:10.555
Speaker 1: Right.
00:32:10.555 --> 00:32:14.155
Speaker 1: Whether they would say that when you're not in the room or not, I
00:32:14.155 --> 00:32:18.155
Speaker 1: I think that that there's something there that I think is probably important
00:32:18.155 --> 00:32:22.155
Speaker 1: for you to own so that you kind of
00:32:22.235 --> 00:32:25.950
Speaker 1: incept into their minds that they're that they got some goodness from you.
00:32:25.950 --> 00:32:26.430
Speaker 1: I think Yeah.
00:32:26.430 --> 00:32:27.150
Speaker 1: Okay.
00:32:27.150 --> 00:32:27.790
Speaker 0: Yeah.
00:32:27.790 --> 00:32:28.670
Speaker 0: I'll sign up for that.
00:32:28.670 --> 00:32:29.950
Speaker 0: I like that.
00:32:29.950 --> 00:32:30.350
Speaker 0: Okay.
00:32:30.350 --> 00:32:32.190
Speaker 0: The other question I had, it's so interesting.
00:32:32.190 --> 00:32:36.190
Speaker 0: It through these conversations and the hand handful of these
00:32:37.310 --> 00:32:39.815
Speaker 0: these one on ones,
00:32:39.815 --> 00:32:41.095
Speaker 0: episodes that I've done.
00:32:41.095 --> 00:32:45.095
Speaker 0: It's amazing how they even with zero intention, I gave you no boundaries.
00:32:45.175 --> 00:32:46.135
Speaker 0: I give none of the guess.
00:32:46.135 --> 00:32:48.375
Speaker 0: Like, you wanna ask me anything.
00:32:48.375 --> 00:32:52.375
Speaker 0: But they always do kind of they have so far at least,
00:32:52.760 --> 00:32:55.240
Speaker 0: kind of aligned around, core themes.
00:32:55.240 --> 00:32:57.240
Speaker 0: So when you're asking me that question, like, oh my god.
00:32:57.240 --> 00:33:01.240
Speaker 0: This is really relates to the second question that I wanted to ask you
00:33:01.320 --> 00:33:01.880
Speaker 1: Alright.
00:33:01.880 --> 00:33:05.880
Speaker 0: Which is a bit deeply not deeply, but can be
00:33:05.960 --> 00:33:07.325
Speaker 0: a bit uncomfortable.
00:33:07.325 --> 00:33:11.325
Speaker 0: So I wanna know tell me about the times in your
00:33:11.565 --> 00:33:15.565
Speaker 0: life, in the past or even today, where you have
00:33:15.645 --> 00:33:19.645
Speaker 0: a really hard time being happy for people.
00:33:20.710 --> 00:33:24.550
Speaker 0: And I think it does go back to that insecurity where I can tell
00:33:24.550 --> 00:33:27.510
Speaker 0: you that's like there are people close in my life where great things happen,
00:33:27.510 --> 00:33:31.510
Speaker 0: and I'm like, I feel like such an asshole.
00:33:31.510 --> 00:33:32.550
Speaker 0: Maybe I'm jealous.
00:33:32.550 --> 00:33:34.305
Speaker 0: Maybe I'm envious.
00:33:34.305 --> 00:33:38.305
Speaker 0: I get a manufacturer being happy for them because
00:33:39.345 --> 00:33:43.345
Speaker 0: I'm my my default is I'm not
00:33:43.425 --> 00:33:44.385
Speaker 0: happy for you.
00:33:44.385 --> 00:33:48.170
Speaker 0: And I take a little bit of joy when things aren't going well for
00:33:48.170 --> 00:33:48.730
Speaker 0: them.
00:33:48.730 --> 00:33:52.730
Speaker 0: And I fucking hate it's the one thing about me that I wish
00:33:52.970 --> 00:33:53.690
Speaker 0: I could change.
00:33:53.690 --> 00:33:55.930
Speaker 0: I fucking hate this about myself.
00:33:55.930 --> 00:33:58.730
Speaker 1: I could I could really take this thing for a twist and say and
00:33:58.730 --> 00:34:02.585
Speaker 1: we run this program called unblock yourself, and every time somebody gets unblocked, it
00:34:02.585 --> 00:34:03.705
Speaker 1: pisses me off, man.
00:34:03.705 --> 00:34:05.065
Speaker 1: Like, I'm just so hey.
00:34:05.065 --> 00:34:06.025
Speaker 1: I hit my milestones.
00:34:06.025 --> 00:34:09.545
Speaker 1: Like, fuck you.
00:34:09.545 --> 00:34:12.905
Speaker 0: You're here to be a failure so I can feel better about myself.
00:34:12.905 --> 00:34:14.105
Speaker 1: We run this program.
00:34:14.105 --> 00:34:14.985
Speaker 1: We run this program.
00:34:14.985 --> 00:34:17.305
Speaker 1: We do all the work we do because we want we want people to
00:34:17.305 --> 00:34:21.040
Speaker 1: come to us so we can we can just rub it in their face.
00:34:21.040 --> 00:34:22.880
Speaker 1: There's so much to suck.
00:34:22.880 --> 00:34:25.600
Speaker 1: This is this is a this is an interesting one.
00:34:25.600 --> 00:34:29.600
Speaker 1: Well, so because, yeah, you're really putting me on the spot here.
00:34:31.040 --> 00:34:33.595
Speaker 1: You know, could really alienate some people.
00:34:33.595 --> 00:34:36.875
Speaker 1: Well, here's I'll start with the opposite of your question.
00:34:36.875 --> 00:34:38.715
Speaker 1: My brother
00:34:38.715 --> 00:34:41.835
Speaker 1: is my brother is
00:34:41.835 --> 00:34:44.715
Speaker 1: well, he's my younger brother, and
00:34:44.715 --> 00:34:46.840
Speaker 1: he know, went to high school like I did.
00:34:46.840 --> 00:34:47.880
Speaker 1: He went to university.
00:34:47.880 --> 00:34:51.240
Speaker 1: He didn't finish, didn't finish going to university.
00:34:51.240 --> 00:34:55.240
Speaker 1: He moved back to, to our
00:34:55.240 --> 00:34:55.720
Speaker 1: hometown.
00:34:55.720 --> 00:34:59.720
Speaker 1: And then he worked in my in my family business, my
00:34:59.800 --> 00:35:03.695
Speaker 1: dad's shop, for a number of years.
00:35:03.695 --> 00:35:07.135
Speaker 1: And he's really good at that.
00:35:07.135 --> 00:35:11.135
Speaker 1: And over the years, though, I think he's been navigating
00:35:11.215 --> 00:35:14.040
Speaker 1: trying to find something that'll make him really happy.
00:35:14.040 --> 00:35:18.040
Speaker 1: And I think that I've always enjoyed being, like, the older
00:35:18.040 --> 00:35:19.960
Speaker 1: brother that's had his shit together.
00:35:19.960 --> 00:35:23.400
Speaker 1: And I've so, you know, when I can meet up with with Ken, I
00:35:23.400 --> 00:35:24.440
Speaker 1: can his name's Ken.
00:35:24.440 --> 00:35:28.440
Speaker 1: We can I can be, you know, wise or whatever?
00:35:28.555 --> 00:35:28.795
Speaker 1: Right?
00:35:28.795 --> 00:35:30.395
Speaker 1: Like, I can give advice.
00:35:30.395 --> 00:35:33.355
Speaker 1: And I think something just happened for him.
00:35:33.355 --> 00:35:35.915
Speaker 1: He got
00:35:35.915 --> 00:35:39.915
Speaker 1: he he got into into frame for him this idea that
00:35:40.155 --> 00:35:44.155
Speaker 1: he figured out that he is a excellent person
00:35:44.280 --> 00:35:48.040
Speaker 1: at caring for others and he stays calm in really dramatic situations.
00:35:48.040 --> 00:35:51.400
Speaker 1: Just somehow, this this all clicked into frame for him.
00:35:51.400 --> 00:35:54.200
Speaker 1: So he's saying, maybe I'll be a paramedic and Mhmm.
00:35:54.200 --> 00:35:58.200
Speaker 1: Long story short, he just, like, standing ovation for Ken,
00:35:58.235 --> 00:36:02.235
Speaker 1: he is a certified firefighter and he just got hired in our
00:36:02.235 --> 00:36:06.235
Speaker 1: hometown to be a firefighter in our our hometown fire, fire
00:36:06.315 --> 00:36:06.955
Speaker 1: hall.
00:36:06.955 --> 00:36:07.995
Speaker 1: And he's graduated.
00:36:07.995 --> 00:36:10.610
Speaker 1: He's never graduated from anything besides high school.
00:36:10.610 --> 00:36:12.050
Speaker 1: He applied for the job and interviewed.
00:36:12.050 --> 00:36:14.130
Speaker 1: He's never applied for a job or interviewed for something ever.
00:36:14.130 --> 00:36:15.570
Speaker 1: He's got it.
00:36:15.570 --> 00:36:19.570
Speaker 1: And that was a scenario where I've as much as I've
00:36:19.810 --> 00:36:23.410
Speaker 1: always enjoyed being the the older brother and the wise one who's being really
00:36:23.410 --> 00:36:27.410
Speaker 1: successful, I think that I think that this is a
00:36:27.435 --> 00:36:31.435
Speaker 1: moment where I actually felt pure joy for him, like genuine
00:36:31.515 --> 00:36:32.555
Speaker 1: happiness.
00:36:32.555 --> 00:36:35.115
Speaker 1: But I think that that's new for me, Bob.
00:36:35.115 --> 00:36:37.355
Speaker 1: I think Greg,
00:36:37.355 --> 00:36:41.355
Speaker 1: five years ago, when I wasn't doing something that I genuinely
00:36:41.435 --> 00:36:45.435
Speaker 1: loved, I think that seeing him find something that he loved and
00:36:45.570 --> 00:36:49.570
Speaker 1: then going after it would have made me feel,
00:36:49.970 --> 00:36:53.970
Speaker 1: like, yeah, like, icky because I would wanna be happy for him, but
00:36:53.970 --> 00:36:57.495
Speaker 1: I'd be a little bit, like, fuck you, Ken.
00:36:57.495 --> 00:36:57.895
Speaker 1: You know?
00:36:57.895 --> 00:36:58.455
Speaker 1: Look at you.
00:36:58.455 --> 00:37:01.175
Speaker 1: Because my parents are really proud of him and everyone's like, oh, Ken's so
00:37:01.175 --> 00:37:01.895
Speaker 1: great.
00:37:01.895 --> 00:37:04.935
Speaker 1: And and, oh, there's Greg, you know, vice president of whatever.
00:37:04.935 --> 00:37:06.535
Speaker 1: Like, we don't even know what he does.
00:37:06.535 --> 00:37:10.535
Speaker 1: And and I think now that I'm doing something that I
00:37:10.630 --> 00:37:14.310
Speaker 1: really love, it's changed it's reframed it a little bit for me.
00:37:14.310 --> 00:37:17.270
Speaker 1: That when I see people being successful, I'm like, oh, yeah.
00:37:17.270 --> 00:37:21.270
Speaker 1: Like, as successful or not as we are, I I
00:37:21.270 --> 00:37:25.255
Speaker 1: actually am feeling a little bit more, like, when I see other people being
00:37:25.255 --> 00:37:26.775
Speaker 1: successful.
00:37:26.775 --> 00:37:29.175
Speaker 1: I
00:37:29.175 --> 00:37:33.175
Speaker 1: I I I actually because I know exactly what you mean because I would
00:37:33.175 --> 00:37:35.460
Speaker 1: have felt that way five years ago.
00:37:35.460 --> 00:37:38.260
Speaker 1: I feel a little bit less
00:37:38.260 --> 00:37:39.780
Speaker 1: like that now.
00:37:39.780 --> 00:37:40.660
Speaker 1: Caveat.
00:37:40.660 --> 00:37:43.300
Speaker 1: Alex Parks was on this podcast twice before I was.
00:37:43.300 --> 00:37:44.180
Speaker 1: Pisses me off.
00:37:44.180 --> 00:37:44.380
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:37:44.340 --> 00:37:46.980
Speaker 1: So I was, when I saw her name show up on your feed for
00:37:46.980 --> 00:37:50.665
Speaker 1: the second time, Alex, when you listen to this, I was jealous as hell.
00:37:50.665 --> 00:37:51.945
Speaker 1: I'm like, fuck you, Alex.
00:37:51.945 --> 00:37:54.665
Speaker 1: That's how I felt.
00:37:54.665 --> 00:37:58.665
Speaker 1: But I think generally, Bob, like, it's
00:37:58.665 --> 00:38:01.305
Speaker 1: it's a great question because I've felt it forever.
00:38:01.305 --> 00:38:05.305
Speaker 1: I remember when when I was working in in tech and working in
00:38:05.540 --> 00:38:09.540
Speaker 1: the industry, I anybody succeeding.
00:38:09.940 --> 00:38:13.940
Speaker 1: Anybody like, you consulting and coaching and anything that I saw
00:38:13.940 --> 00:38:17.655
Speaker 1: was just, like, Bob Mathers wins why where's my award?
00:38:17.655 --> 00:38:19.015
Speaker 1: Like, fuck Bob.
00:38:19.015 --> 00:38:19.255
Speaker 1: Right?
00:38:19.255 --> 00:38:20.775
Speaker 1: Like, I would always feel that way.
00:38:20.775 --> 00:38:23.415
Speaker 1: I genuinely
00:38:23.415 --> 00:38:27.415
Speaker 1: I think that now, I'm kinda when I see other people succeeding,
00:38:27.895 --> 00:38:29.335
Speaker 1: I kinda go, wow.
00:38:29.335 --> 00:38:31.620
Speaker 1: Like, good for them.
00:38:31.620 --> 00:38:35.460
Speaker 1: I hope that I can I hope that I can do that too with
00:38:35.460 --> 00:38:36.100
Speaker 1: what I'm doing?
00:38:36.100 --> 00:38:39.300
Speaker 1: Because I did the whole re back to zero thing.
00:38:39.300 --> 00:38:43.300
Speaker 1: Going from having a successful job to starting a business,
00:38:43.895 --> 00:38:46.055
Speaker 1: really having a tough time articulating what it was we did.
00:38:46.055 --> 00:38:49.815
Speaker 1: And then having people ask me about, like, this whole project you're working on,
00:38:49.815 --> 00:38:50.935
Speaker 1: how's it going there, Greg?
00:38:50.935 --> 00:38:54.935
Speaker 1: And feeling awkward and But I I feel,
00:38:54.935 --> 00:38:57.335
Speaker 1: yeah, I feel less
00:38:57.335 --> 00:39:00.660
Speaker 1: competitive about things
00:39:00.660 --> 00:39:02.260
Speaker 1: than
00:39:02.260 --> 00:39:04.500
Speaker 1: than I ever have, but I know the feeling.
00:39:04.500 --> 00:39:06.580
Speaker 1: And I I hold up my brother as an example of that.
00:39:06.580 --> 00:39:10.260
Speaker 1: Thank god he was successful becoming a firefighter now and not five years ago
00:39:10.260 --> 00:39:12.660
Speaker 1: because I would've hated him.
00:39:12.660 --> 00:39:12.980
Speaker 0: Yeah.
00:39:12.980 --> 00:39:13.940
Speaker 0: It does.
00:39:13.940 --> 00:39:17.035
Speaker 1: But there's something to that though because I that resonates with me, but it's
00:39:17.035 --> 00:39:18.235
Speaker 1: it's just changed.
00:39:18.235 --> 00:39:19.755
Speaker 1: It's just changed for
00:39:19.755 --> 00:39:19.955
Speaker 0: me.
00:39:19.835 --> 00:39:22.635
Speaker 0: It does come back to the insecurity piece.
00:39:22.635 --> 00:39:25.435
Speaker 0: It's something that
00:39:25.435 --> 00:39:26.955
Speaker 0: I've never talked about.
00:39:26.955 --> 00:39:30.955
Speaker 0: I could never how would I tell one of my friends that
00:39:31.280 --> 00:39:34.160
Speaker 0: something great has happened to them and that I'm actually not very happy for
00:39:34.160 --> 00:39:37.040
Speaker 0: them, and I'm a little happier when things don't go well?
00:39:37.040 --> 00:39:40.240
Speaker 0: Just seems like such a terrible
00:39:40.240 --> 00:39:41.280
Speaker 0: trait to have.
00:39:41.280 --> 00:39:42.160
Speaker 0: I agree.
00:39:42.160 --> 00:39:42.480
Speaker 0: Yeah.
00:39:42.480 --> 00:39:45.385
Speaker 0: Much more common than anybody would talk about.
00:39:45.385 --> 00:39:48.905
Speaker 0: You and I, when we first met, we were sort of tech bros.
00:39:48.905 --> 00:39:52.745
Speaker 0: And then we would, you know, we were
00:39:52.745 --> 00:39:56.265
Speaker 0: I don't think I you know, you left and got a a big job,
00:39:56.265 --> 00:39:59.600
Speaker 0: and then I was a VP, and then you were a VP, and we
00:39:59.600 --> 00:40:00.720
Speaker 0: get together and have a beer.
00:40:00.720 --> 00:40:03.760
Speaker 0: I don't think either of us was happy for the other person ever.
00:40:03.760 --> 00:40:04.080
Speaker 1: Okay.
00:40:04.080 --> 00:40:04.480
Speaker 1: We were just
00:40:04.480 --> 00:40:07.040
Speaker 0: sort of put on this, you know, facade of, hey.
00:40:07.040 --> 00:40:07.680
Speaker 0: Oh, it's real.
00:40:07.680 --> 00:40:09.200
Speaker 0: You're doing some great things, man.
00:40:09.200 --> 00:40:10.080
Speaker 0: It's so great.
00:40:10.080 --> 00:40:12.505
Speaker 0: And we're just like, fuck that guy.
00:40:12.505 --> 00:40:13.065
Speaker 1: Totally.
00:40:13.065 --> 00:40:16.825
Speaker 1: So I I am sure there were multiple occasions where people would ask me,
00:40:16.825 --> 00:40:18.745
Speaker 1: oh, do you hear Bob just got promoted to VP?
00:40:18.745 --> 00:40:21.145
Speaker 1: I'd be like, that guy is not a vice president.
00:40:21.145 --> 00:40:24.585
Speaker 1: That guy that is gonna go down in flames.
00:40:24.585 --> 00:40:27.480
Speaker 1: I I I'm sure that I said that behind your back.
00:40:27.480 --> 00:40:29.800
Speaker 1: I that's so that's so funny.
00:40:29.800 --> 00:40:33.080
Speaker 1: And Whitney has accused me of this often.
00:40:33.080 --> 00:40:34.680
Speaker 1: And sadly, it's a bit true.
00:40:34.680 --> 00:40:38.520
Speaker 1: Like, she's she's said things like,
00:40:38.520 --> 00:40:40.835
Speaker 1: she'll she'll say
00:40:40.835 --> 00:40:44.835
Speaker 1: that I have a tendency to stay in touch with people that serve
00:40:44.915 --> 00:40:46.195
Speaker 1: me in some way.
00:40:46.195 --> 00:40:49.715
Speaker 1: So, you know, this whole idea of, you know, Bob and I are tech
00:40:49.715 --> 00:40:53.635
Speaker 1: bros, and we'll hang out with each other and and all of that because
00:40:53.635 --> 00:40:55.650
Speaker 1: in some way, it actually benefits me.
00:40:55.650 --> 00:40:57.010
Speaker 1: Mhmm.
00:40:57.010 --> 00:40:59.970
Speaker 1: I think I think there's been there's there's some truth to that.
00:40:59.970 --> 00:41:03.890
Speaker 1: But also, I just really like as it's turned out, I just really like
00:41:03.890 --> 00:41:07.890
Speaker 1: interesting people and people who are interesting such as yourself,
00:41:08.850 --> 00:41:12.850
Speaker 1: like, because we've definitely opened a different chapter in our relationship,
00:41:12.905 --> 00:41:15.305
Speaker 1: are, I think,
00:41:15.305 --> 00:41:17.945
Speaker 1: I think that,
00:41:17.945 --> 00:41:21.945
Speaker 1: I think that interesting people tend to be, tend to tend to be
00:41:21.945 --> 00:41:25.945
Speaker 1: successful in their own, in whatever way that means for for them.
00:41:26.480 --> 00:41:30.480
Speaker 1: All but you're making me think, though, when we
00:41:31.120 --> 00:41:35.120
Speaker 1: reopened the chapter of our life together,
00:41:36.000 --> 00:41:39.120
Speaker 1: that sounds like a lot more formal than it needed to be.
00:41:39.120 --> 00:41:43.120
Speaker 1: When because you and I, we were together interacting regularly, and
00:41:43.215 --> 00:41:47.135
Speaker 1: then I went off the cliff of my life in twenty twenty, and we
00:41:47.135 --> 00:41:49.295
Speaker 1: probably didn't talk for four or five years.
00:41:49.295 --> 00:41:53.295
Speaker 1: And so when we reconnected in the context of of Vanna Waites,
00:41:54.670 --> 00:41:58.670
Speaker 1: your you came forward with wanting to build a speaking career in
00:41:58.990 --> 00:42:02.990
Speaker 1: a in this I I so I'll be honest, I actually think
00:42:03.070 --> 00:42:07.070
Speaker 1: that when you articulated that as a goal, I
00:42:08.685 --> 00:42:10.525
Speaker 1: I felt like I wanted to do that.
00:42:10.525 --> 00:42:14.525
Speaker 1: And so seeing you were providing, ironically, providing a program that
00:42:14.525 --> 00:42:17.485
Speaker 1: would help you do that, I was like, fuck this guy.
00:42:17.485 --> 00:42:20.685
Speaker 1: I don't want him to be but but I think that that's something's faded
00:42:20.685 --> 00:42:24.685
Speaker 1: away because I've I've figured out a little bit more what it what
00:42:24.920 --> 00:42:28.920
Speaker 1: it's been for what it is that I'm supposed to to put
00:42:29.000 --> 00:42:33.000
Speaker 1: my energy into, and that helps me focus on me
00:42:33.880 --> 00:42:37.880
Speaker 1: and less on, you know, what Bob's doing or anybody else,
00:42:38.235 --> 00:42:40.875
Speaker 1: which has been that's a totally new thing.
00:42:40.875 --> 00:42:42.475
Speaker 1: That's very new.
00:42:42.475 --> 00:42:42.795
Speaker 0: Yeah.
00:42:42.795 --> 00:42:44.395
Speaker 0: And I noticed it in myself too.
00:42:44.395 --> 00:42:48.155
Speaker 0: And I think the point, I guess, is that
00:42:48.155 --> 00:42:52.155
Speaker 0: if you know, when I feel it, when you're feeling it, it's a signal
00:42:52.315 --> 00:42:55.010
Speaker 0: that something's out of frame.
00:42:55.010 --> 00:42:59.010
Speaker 0: We're using language around a book that we're both deeply engrossed in right now.
00:42:59.170 --> 00:43:02.690
Speaker 0: What to Make of Life by Jim Collins.
00:43:02.690 --> 00:43:05.655
Speaker 0: But it's it's a signal that
00:43:05.655 --> 00:43:08.695
Speaker 0: that something is out of you're not in a line.
00:43:08.695 --> 00:43:11.175
Speaker 0: You're not
00:43:11.175 --> 00:43:14.615
Speaker 0: avoid using the word purpose, but you're not doing the things that you're naturally
00:43:14.615 --> 00:43:16.295
Speaker 0: encoded to do.
00:43:16.295 --> 00:43:20.295
Speaker 0: And because when you are, it feels like you're genuinely happy.
00:43:20.810 --> 00:43:23.450
Speaker 0: Everybody else around me, I hope they find their encodings.
00:43:23.450 --> 00:43:25.770
Speaker 0: I hope they're in frame because I finally found something.
00:43:25.770 --> 00:43:29.290
Speaker 0: And I would say even in the last year, you and Whitney have got
00:43:29.290 --> 00:43:33.050
Speaker 0: much more focused on what the business is about, what you're uniquely talented, not
00:43:33.050 --> 00:43:37.050
Speaker 0: just have strengths on, but naturally born
00:43:37.185 --> 00:43:40.545
Speaker 0: gifted things that you're good at.
00:43:40.545 --> 00:43:44.545
Speaker 0: And that just makes it easier to be happy for everyone around you because
00:43:45.025 --> 00:43:47.745
Speaker 0: it feels the competition feels less important.
00:43:47.745 --> 00:43:49.850
Speaker 1: I I think that's so on point.
00:43:49.850 --> 00:43:53.850
Speaker 1: I think when you when you like, the general you, when a person
00:43:54.730 --> 00:43:58.170
Speaker 1: speaking from now experiencing this a little bit, and it's just a taste of
00:43:58.170 --> 00:43:58.650
Speaker 1: it.
00:43:58.650 --> 00:44:02.445
Speaker 1: But when you start to get a sense for what it is you're good
00:44:02.445 --> 00:44:06.445
Speaker 1: at, and you and you have conviction and some focus on undoing
00:44:07.005 --> 00:44:11.005
Speaker 1: that thing, then all of a sudden, the
00:44:11.565 --> 00:44:15.565
Speaker 1: the the other things that are interesting fade away
00:44:16.130 --> 00:44:17.170
Speaker 1: because no.
00:44:17.170 --> 00:44:17.370
Speaker 1: No.
00:44:17.330 --> 00:44:17.650
Speaker 1: No.
00:44:17.650 --> 00:44:20.690
Speaker 1: You know, I might wanna speak and I might wanna run a tech company.
00:44:20.690 --> 00:44:23.410
Speaker 1: I wanna I might wanna, you know, sell that or do that, but no.
00:44:23.410 --> 00:44:23.650
Speaker 1: No.
00:44:23.650 --> 00:44:23.850
Speaker 1: No.
00:44:23.810 --> 00:44:26.210
Speaker 1: What I'm supposed to do is this.
00:44:26.210 --> 00:44:30.210
Speaker 1: And once you have that clarity, it's way harder to get jealous
00:44:30.595 --> 00:44:33.475
Speaker 1: of the other people doing the other things because you're just in your lane
00:44:33.475 --> 00:44:36.195
Speaker 1: focused on what you are meant to do.
00:44:36.195 --> 00:44:40.195
Speaker 1: I think that's been such a powerful takeaway from that book everyone
00:44:40.595 --> 00:44:41.315
Speaker 1: should read.
00:44:41.315 --> 00:44:41.710
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:44:41.710 --> 00:44:43.310
Speaker 1: Like, it's like a life manual.
00:44:43.310 --> 00:44:46.430
Speaker 1: I think everyone should get that at the age of eighteen and say, read
00:44:46.430 --> 00:44:46.750
Speaker 1: this.
00:44:46.750 --> 00:44:49.310
Speaker 1: It'll help at some point in time.
00:44:49.310 --> 00:44:51.790
Speaker 1: I think I think that there's some real truth to that because it's so
00:44:51.790 --> 00:44:53.645
Speaker 1: easy to be distracted.
00:44:53.645 --> 00:44:55.165
Speaker 1: There's it's so easy to be distracted.
00:44:55.165 --> 00:44:59.005
Speaker 1: I've been distracted all my life by other people's successes and wanting to be
00:44:59.005 --> 00:45:00.045
Speaker 1: like them.
00:45:00.045 --> 00:45:01.565
Speaker 1: And
00:45:01.565 --> 00:45:05.565
Speaker 1: only when you figure what you're supposed to do can you, I think, be
00:45:06.045 --> 00:45:09.740
Speaker 1: be genuinely happy for other people, even your brother.
00:45:09.740 --> 00:45:10.540
Speaker 0: Yeah.
00:45:10.540 --> 00:45:13.500
Speaker 0: I I, and there were times yeah.
00:45:13.500 --> 00:45:16.700
Speaker 0: There were it's funny you mentioned the book because I'm a little surprised that
00:45:16.700 --> 00:45:19.900
Speaker 0: it's at minute, you know, forty something before the book came up because I
00:45:19.900 --> 00:45:22.380
Speaker 0: was like, I don't need to ask him about this book because it's gonna
00:45:22.380 --> 00:45:24.275
Speaker 0: come up.
00:45:24.275 --> 00:45:27.075
Speaker 0: But I I just walked through the world like, oh, is that person in
00:45:27.075 --> 00:45:27.555
Speaker 0: frame?
00:45:27.555 --> 00:45:29.475
Speaker 0: Or I wonder what if they're encoded for that.
00:45:29.475 --> 00:45:30.675
Speaker 0: Am I encoded for this?
00:45:30.675 --> 00:45:34.675
Speaker 0: It's just changed everything about and I I tend to get
00:45:35.635 --> 00:45:36.690
Speaker 0: kinda fanatical about things.
00:45:36.690 --> 00:45:38.210
Speaker 0: Like, once I find something, it's like, okay.
00:45:38.210 --> 00:45:39.330
Speaker 0: This is gonna change everything.
00:45:39.330 --> 00:45:43.330
Speaker 0: It's just changed my life view, and I think this legitimately is
00:45:43.570 --> 00:45:45.490
Speaker 0: has a lot of promise.
00:45:45.490 --> 00:45:49.010
Speaker 0: And, you know, he's a he's a big deal writer, so it's gonna be
00:45:49.010 --> 00:45:50.065
Speaker 0: a massive thing.
00:45:50.065 --> 00:45:54.065
Speaker 0: And it just feels like it was written perfectly for me right at this
00:45:54.145 --> 00:45:56.305
Speaker 0: point in my life and for everybody that I'm talking to.
00:45:56.305 --> 00:46:00.065
Speaker 0: But I also think, like you said, it's equally something that a twenty year
00:46:00.065 --> 00:46:03.825
Speaker 0: old could read to try to save themselves some time trying to figure out
00:46:03.825 --> 00:46:06.070
Speaker 0: what they're naturally gifted at.
00:46:06.070 --> 00:46:06.270
Speaker 1: At.
00:46:06.150 --> 00:46:08.230
Speaker 1: I saw I I agree.
00:46:08.230 --> 00:46:12.230
Speaker 1: So before before I ask you the next, which is actually a follow
00:46:12.390 --> 00:46:16.390
Speaker 1: on in a way to to the wishing you asked me, the the
00:46:17.110 --> 00:46:21.110
Speaker 1: I saw an app, Microsoft AI generated
00:46:21.125 --> 00:46:25.125
Speaker 1: technology, that is was positioned as the
00:46:25.285 --> 00:46:28.005
Speaker 1: future, and I'll find the name of it, and you can add it to
00:46:28.005 --> 00:46:28.405
Speaker 1: your show notes.
00:46:28.405 --> 00:46:31.750
Speaker 1: But I almost don't wanna promote it because I've got a I've got a
00:46:31.750 --> 00:46:32.070
Speaker 1: problem with it.
00:46:32.070 --> 00:46:33.350
Speaker 1: I'm trying to figure what the problem is.
00:46:33.350 --> 00:46:37.350
Speaker 1: But it's an app that is the future of education that is
00:46:38.070 --> 00:46:42.070
Speaker 1: this agentic AI tool that you can talk to, feed
00:46:42.070 --> 00:46:45.110
Speaker 1: it information about yourself, and it'll tell you what you should do with your
00:46:45.110 --> 00:46:45.830
Speaker 1: life.
00:46:45.830 --> 00:46:47.165
Speaker 1: Mhmm.
00:46:47.165 --> 00:46:51.005
Speaker 1: Which in some ways, I think is super cool.
00:46:51.005 --> 00:46:53.485
Speaker 1: But in so many other ways, I go, god.
00:46:53.485 --> 00:46:56.365
Speaker 1: That that is not how I want my kids to figure out what to
00:46:56.365 --> 00:46:57.645
Speaker 1: do with their lives.
00:46:57.645 --> 00:47:01.645
Speaker 1: And there's so many ways, you know, forget about like, I then I get
00:47:01.650 --> 00:47:04.690
Speaker 1: all big brother and, like, imagine the world needs more engineers.
00:47:04.690 --> 00:47:08.690
Speaker 1: So if somebody tweaks the algorithm to create more create more engineers
00:47:08.690 --> 00:47:09.730
Speaker 1: or whatever.
00:47:09.730 --> 00:47:11.650
Speaker 1: So forget that for a moment.
00:47:11.650 --> 00:47:15.650
Speaker 1: Just the notion that I think that and what this book speaks
00:47:15.655 --> 00:47:18.215
Speaker 1: to is
00:47:18.215 --> 00:47:22.215
Speaker 1: when you authentically encounter the things that you are
00:47:22.535 --> 00:47:26.535
Speaker 1: naturally encoded for, the things that you're naturally gifted at, the things that you're
00:47:26.535 --> 00:47:30.050
Speaker 1: just naturally good at, and not good at relative to other people.
00:47:30.050 --> 00:47:32.210
Speaker 1: It's not like I'm a better speaker than Bob.
00:47:32.210 --> 00:47:35.410
Speaker 1: I'm just a I'm a better I'm better at speaking than I am at
00:47:35.410 --> 00:47:39.330
Speaker 1: other things which I think is a really important distinction.
00:47:39.330 --> 00:47:42.850
Speaker 1: Once you figure that out for yourself, if you do that authentically, then it
00:47:42.850 --> 00:47:44.765
Speaker 1: clicks and it's real.
00:47:44.765 --> 00:47:48.765
Speaker 1: When you're told something, I've been told I'm good at things my whole
00:47:48.925 --> 00:47:49.805
Speaker 1: life.
00:47:49.805 --> 00:47:51.005
Speaker 1: You're good at sales.
00:47:51.005 --> 00:47:51.725
Speaker 1: You should sell.
00:47:51.725 --> 00:47:53.565
Speaker 1: You're good at, leading.
00:47:53.565 --> 00:47:54.205
Speaker 1: You should lead.
00:47:54.205 --> 00:47:55.485
Speaker 1: You're good at building bikes.
00:47:55.485 --> 00:47:56.205
Speaker 1: You should build bikes.
00:47:56.205 --> 00:48:00.205
Speaker 1: So, I just I've always done what people told me to do.
00:48:00.940 --> 00:48:04.860
Speaker 1: To to have an app that tells you what you should do irks me
00:48:04.860 --> 00:48:06.860
Speaker 1: because I think you gotta discover those things.
00:48:06.860 --> 00:48:08.460
Speaker 1: I just made this Yeah.
00:48:08.460 --> 00:48:12.445
Speaker 1: Like, at the tender age of thirty nine, maybe I've gone old school.
00:48:12.445 --> 00:48:16.365
Speaker 1: But I I really believe that the book leans into that in every way,
00:48:16.365 --> 00:48:20.365
Speaker 1: and all the evidence suggests that people discover those things and
00:48:21.165 --> 00:48:23.165
Speaker 1: discovery makes it way richer.
00:48:23.165 --> 00:48:25.000
Speaker 1: But, anyway, I don't know if you put the book.
00:48:25.000 --> 00:48:26.280
Speaker 1: We're geeking out on that.
00:48:26.280 --> 00:48:26.680
Speaker 0: Right.
00:48:26.680 --> 00:48:29.880
Speaker 0: But one last thing is that
00:48:29.880 --> 00:48:33.160
Speaker 0: it's like if somebody could tell you the meaning of life, would you wanna
00:48:33.160 --> 00:48:34.280
Speaker 0: know?
00:48:34.280 --> 00:48:36.815
Speaker 0: The the beauty of it is the searching.
00:48:36.815 --> 00:48:39.775
Speaker 0: It's the the point of it is to try to figure it out, to
00:48:39.775 --> 00:48:42.895
Speaker 0: try to and one of the things the book that I love most about
00:48:42.895 --> 00:48:46.895
Speaker 0: the book is that your encodings are revealed through the your experiences
00:48:47.295 --> 00:48:47.775
Speaker 0: of your life.
00:48:47.775 --> 00:48:48.990
Speaker 0: Yes.
00:48:48.990 --> 00:48:52.350
Speaker 0: Which means if you're fifty five and you've been doing one thing for thirty
00:48:52.350 --> 00:48:55.390
Speaker 0: years and you don't know what else to do, it just means you're naturally
00:48:55.390 --> 00:48:59.390
Speaker 0: gifted at doing a million things that you've never just you never needed
00:48:59.390 --> 00:49:03.390
Speaker 0: to do because life has just never required you to do them, which means
00:49:04.265 --> 00:49:05.865
Speaker 0: you can do virtually anything.
00:49:05.865 --> 00:49:09.145
Speaker 0: You just have to get curious and go out and try new things.
00:49:09.145 --> 00:49:12.905
Speaker 0: And I wouldn't want the answer, somebody to tell me when I'm twenty years
00:49:12.905 --> 00:49:15.225
Speaker 0: old, this is what you were meant to do.
00:49:15.225 --> 00:49:19.225
Speaker 0: I would I would miss out on all of the messiness of
00:49:19.540 --> 00:49:21.220
Speaker 0: finding my way through it myself.
00:49:21.220 --> 00:49:21.620
Speaker 1: Agree.
00:49:21.620 --> 00:49:24.820
Speaker 1: I think that you would I think you would also just not believe it.
00:49:24.820 --> 00:49:27.940
Speaker 1: You it wouldn't be able to, like it wouldn't be wholehearted.
00:49:27.940 --> 00:49:31.585
Speaker 1: You'd just be I am sure I'm gonna do this.
00:49:31.585 --> 00:49:33.505
Speaker 1: Where where did this question even begin?
00:49:33.505 --> 00:49:34.385
Speaker 1: This is I
00:49:34.385 --> 00:49:35.825
Speaker 0: honestly was it my question?
00:49:35.825 --> 00:49:37.105
Speaker 0: It was I think it was.
00:49:37.105 --> 00:49:37.345
Speaker 0: Yeah.
00:49:37.345 --> 00:49:37.985
Speaker 1: It was your question.
00:49:37.985 --> 00:49:39.665
Speaker 1: Oh, I think you were asking about no.
00:49:39.665 --> 00:49:42.705
Speaker 1: I think this is a it was a great tangent because it it it
00:49:42.705 --> 00:49:45.425
Speaker 1: was when you get jealous of of people.
00:49:45.425 --> 00:49:49.425
Speaker 1: I I I have been I won't ask I won't ask you
00:49:49.660 --> 00:49:53.660
Speaker 1: specifically, but I am curious if that's faded for you
00:49:53.980 --> 00:49:56.460
Speaker 1: before we move off the topic.
00:49:56.460 --> 00:50:00.460
Speaker 1: Has that faded for you, or is it still a thing that
00:50:00.460 --> 00:50:02.195
Speaker 1: you struggle with?
00:50:02.195 --> 00:50:05.235
Speaker 0: It's still a thing I struggle with, but it's also faded.
00:50:05.235 --> 00:50:09.235
Speaker 0: And as I become clearer on
00:50:09.795 --> 00:50:12.435
Speaker 0: what I wanna do for the next ten years or at least the next
00:50:12.435 --> 00:50:16.435
Speaker 0: couple years, it's like when it hits, it's when I'm feeling
00:50:16.910 --> 00:50:20.910
Speaker 0: insecure, when I'm in the fog, when I'm lost, when I haven't slept well.
00:50:21.870 --> 00:50:24.350
Speaker 0: It's one hundred percent to do with me.
00:50:24.350 --> 00:50:28.350
Speaker 0: And when I'm feeling I've had some success and I've got some momentum
00:50:28.905 --> 00:50:31.385
Speaker 0: and I'm feeling aligned,
00:50:31.385 --> 00:50:34.425
Speaker 0: I have no problem being happy with the people around me.
00:50:34.425 --> 00:50:37.225
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:50:37.225 --> 00:50:38.905
Speaker 1: Okay.
00:50:38.905 --> 00:50:42.905
Speaker 1: Bob, I've got a I guess this would be our our last the
00:50:42.905 --> 00:50:43.545
Speaker 1: last question.
00:50:43.545 --> 00:50:46.660
Speaker 1: I mean, as you've as I've heard you say in these episodes before, you
00:50:46.660 --> 00:50:47.620
Speaker 1: keep them going forever.
00:50:47.620 --> 00:50:50.980
Speaker 1: But let me let me hit you with this because I had a few,
00:50:50.980 --> 00:50:54.980
Speaker 1: but the one that seems to fit really nicely with this is,
00:50:55.300 --> 00:50:59.300
Speaker 1: what do you wish people would say about you behind your back?
00:51:00.935 --> 00:51:03.975
Speaker 1: So when you're not in the room, if you were to look around, you
00:51:03.975 --> 00:51:05.655
Speaker 1: can characterize this as well.
00:51:05.655 --> 00:51:09.015
Speaker 1: You could say, generally, or you could say, I'd want these people to say
00:51:09.015 --> 00:51:09.255
Speaker 1: this.
00:51:09.255 --> 00:51:10.375
Speaker 1: I don't want those people.
00:51:10.375 --> 00:51:13.255
Speaker 1: What do you what would you want people to say about you behind your
00:51:13.255 --> 00:51:15.790
Speaker 1: back?
00:51:15.790 --> 00:51:18.030
Speaker 1: And I can tell you all the things that I've said about you behind
00:51:18.030 --> 00:51:22.030
Speaker 1: your back, but it wouldn't it probably wouldn't be probably wouldn't
00:51:22.030 --> 00:51:26.030
Speaker 1: be, helpful in this context.
00:51:29.470 --> 00:51:33.205
Speaker 1: I
00:51:33.205 --> 00:51:33.525
Speaker 0: god.
00:51:33.525 --> 00:51:37.525
Speaker 0: That is a great question.
00:51:40.805 --> 00:51:44.325
Speaker 0: The my I guess I just gotta go with the first thing that pops
00:51:44.325 --> 00:51:46.820
Speaker 0: into my head
00:51:46.820 --> 00:51:50.660
Speaker 0: in
00:51:50.660 --> 00:51:54.660
Speaker 0: that he helps me see things in myself that I
00:51:55.140 --> 00:51:58.655
Speaker 0: didn't know before.
00:51:58.655 --> 00:52:02.095
Speaker 0: That's one of the things I think
00:52:02.095 --> 00:52:06.095
Speaker 0: that it comes up.
00:52:07.375 --> 00:52:08.095
Speaker 0: You know?
00:52:08.095 --> 00:52:12.095
Speaker 0: Obviously, maybe the second one is that he was,
00:52:13.055 --> 00:52:17.055
Speaker 0: you know, that he's a good dad.
00:52:18.950 --> 00:52:22.230
Speaker 0: And I don't I don't know why those things come up first, and I'm
00:52:22.230 --> 00:52:25.350
Speaker 0: sure I could come up with a more eloquent
00:52:25.350 --> 00:52:28.695
Speaker 0: answer, but those are the things that pop into my head.
00:52:28.695 --> 00:52:32.295
Speaker 1: Can you hit the first one again or re reinterpret that?
00:52:32.295 --> 00:52:35.415
Speaker 1: What what was the first again in your words?
00:52:35.415 --> 00:52:39.415
Speaker 0: He helps me see things in myself that I didn't know were there.
00:52:39.820 --> 00:52:40.300
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:52:40.300 --> 00:52:43.100
Speaker 1: That's a good one.
00:52:43.100 --> 00:52:46.220
Speaker 1: Cool.
00:52:46.220 --> 00:52:49.820
Speaker 1: Why is that important to you?
00:52:49.820 --> 00:52:50.060
Speaker 0: Yeah.
00:52:50.060 --> 00:52:54.060
Speaker 0: I was thinking about that too.
00:52:54.745 --> 00:52:56.665
Speaker 0: I can only
00:52:56.665 --> 00:52:58.265
Speaker 0: speculate
00:52:58.265 --> 00:53:01.465
Speaker 0: that
00:53:01.465 --> 00:53:05.465
Speaker 0: it's what I value in the people around me,
00:53:05.545 --> 00:53:09.545
Speaker 0: and maybe it's what I wish I had more of at certain
00:53:09.710 --> 00:53:13.710
Speaker 0: times of my life.
00:53:14.830 --> 00:53:18.830
Speaker 0: I think we are all
00:53:19.150 --> 00:53:20.875
Speaker 0: so
00:53:20.875 --> 00:53:24.875
Speaker 0: much we're much more capable
00:53:25.755 --> 00:53:27.755
Speaker 0: than we can see.
00:53:27.755 --> 00:53:31.755
Speaker 0: Like, it's impossible for ourselves to see the promise, the
00:53:31.755 --> 00:53:35.755
Speaker 0: things that we're naturally gifted at, the millions of other amazing
00:53:36.100 --> 00:53:40.100
Speaker 0: things we could do with the talents that we've that we were born
00:53:40.100 --> 00:53:44.100
Speaker 0: with and the strengths that we've nurtured over our lives.
00:53:44.820 --> 00:53:46.020
Speaker 0: We just can't see it.
00:53:46.020 --> 00:53:49.415
Speaker 0: We just live in this meat sack every day, and we have these stories
00:53:49.415 --> 00:53:52.135
Speaker 0: that we tell ourselves about what we're good at.
00:53:52.135 --> 00:53:55.735
Speaker 0: And if you can have somebody that
00:53:55.735 --> 00:53:59.735
Speaker 0: can hold up that mirror and says, this is what the world sees.
00:54:01.600 --> 00:54:05.600
Speaker 0: All of these things that you don't see or you forgotten about yourself.
00:54:06.560 --> 00:54:09.600
Speaker 0: And this person
00:54:09.600 --> 00:54:11.280
Speaker 0: is unstoppable.
00:54:11.280 --> 00:54:15.265
Speaker 0: They can do it's not a matter of what you can do.
00:54:15.265 --> 00:54:19.265
Speaker 0: It's just a matter of picking the next thing
00:54:19.825 --> 00:54:23.825
Speaker 0: that everybody in the world knows you're capable of doing except you.
00:54:25.505 --> 00:54:28.350
Speaker 1: And there's a mic drop moment.
00:54:28.350 --> 00:54:29.310
Speaker 1: That's great.
00:54:29.310 --> 00:54:33.310
Speaker 1: I think and I think it comes from a place of,
00:54:34.030 --> 00:54:38.030
Speaker 1: again, I think this general or genuine encoding
00:54:38.030 --> 00:54:42.030
Speaker 1: for you, like a genuine
00:54:42.295 --> 00:54:45.335
Speaker 1: desire to be a certain way or help other people be a certain way.
00:54:45.335 --> 00:54:49.335
Speaker 1: It also comes, it sounds like, from
00:54:49.335 --> 00:54:53.335
Speaker 1: a thing you missed out on for a long time in your life.
00:54:55.280 --> 00:54:57.440
Speaker 1: That'd be a good one if people said no.
00:54:57.440 --> 00:54:58.640
Speaker 1: I'll let you know.
00:54:58.640 --> 00:54:58.880
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:54:58.880 --> 00:55:00.480
Speaker 1: I'll let you know if I hear that.
00:55:00.480 --> 00:55:01.840
Speaker 0: That feels pretty ambitious.
00:55:01.840 --> 00:55:02.240
Speaker 0: Yeah.
00:55:02.240 --> 00:55:04.960
Speaker 1: But but I I I love that as a I love that as a
00:55:04.960 --> 00:55:07.695
Speaker 1: North Star.
00:55:07.695 --> 00:55:11.695
Speaker 0: What are the things that you hope people say when you're not
00:55:11.775 --> 00:55:12.815
Speaker 0: around?
00:55:12.815 --> 00:55:15.455
Speaker 1: I really hope that people would say that I helped them see a version
00:55:15.455 --> 00:55:19.215
Speaker 1: of themselves that was better and sorry, Bob.
00:55:19.215 --> 00:55:21.800
Speaker 1: That wasn't
00:55:21.800 --> 00:55:25.480
Speaker 1: What I wrote down was exactly that, exactly what you said.
00:55:25.480 --> 00:55:28.680
Speaker 1: When so, of course, in asking the question, it forced me to think about
00:55:28.680 --> 00:55:29.800
Speaker 1: what my answer might be.
00:55:29.800 --> 00:55:33.800
Speaker 1: I think that it's unfortunately not as profound,
00:55:34.715 --> 00:55:38.715
Speaker 1: as as what you had said, but I I would leave it at this.
00:55:38.715 --> 00:55:42.715
Speaker 1: I think that if people the value that I end up
00:55:42.715 --> 00:55:46.715
Speaker 1: hearing myself talk to the kids about constantly is just
00:55:46.715 --> 00:55:48.400
Speaker 1: kindness.
00:55:48.400 --> 00:55:52.400
Speaker 1: And so, I think if if I think I would love it
00:55:52.400 --> 00:55:55.440
Speaker 1: if people said things my ego would love it if people said things like,
00:55:55.440 --> 00:55:57.920
Speaker 1: he's a genius and he's so smart.
00:55:57.920 --> 00:56:01.695
Speaker 1: But I think at my core, I think it's probably,
00:56:01.695 --> 00:56:04.975
Speaker 1: I think if people said, man, he's just kind.
00:56:04.975 --> 00:56:07.855
Speaker 1: He's just a really kind person.
00:56:07.855 --> 00:56:08.495
Speaker 1: Like, what else?
00:56:08.495 --> 00:56:09.455
Speaker 1: What else would I need?
00:56:09.455 --> 00:56:12.335
Speaker 1: I think if I left the room and people were like, there's there's a
00:56:12.335 --> 00:56:13.615
Speaker 1: kind human being.
00:56:13.615 --> 00:56:17.300
Speaker 1: Like, he's a good man, back to the first point.
00:56:17.300 --> 00:56:17.620
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:56:17.620 --> 00:56:21.620
Speaker 1: I think that would be I think that would be that'd be
00:56:21.620 --> 00:56:23.780
Speaker 1: winning for me, I think.
00:56:23.780 --> 00:56:27.220
Speaker 1: All those other things are really nice and and helpful, but I think that's
00:56:27.220 --> 00:56:29.975
Speaker 1: the the ultimate one.
00:56:29.975 --> 00:56:30.375
Speaker 0: Yep.
00:56:30.375 --> 00:56:32.535
Speaker 0: That's good.
00:56:32.535 --> 00:56:34.695
Speaker 0: How did this conversation feel to you?
00:56:34.695 --> 00:56:38.695
Speaker 0: How did it how was it different than what you were expecting?
00:56:40.535 --> 00:56:44.170
Speaker 1: Well, the thing is because I had such high hopes for it, I've been
00:56:44.170 --> 00:56:46.650
Speaker 1: looking forward to it so much,
00:56:46.650 --> 00:56:50.650
Speaker 1: the like, it was in no way underwhelming except for my voice cracking
00:56:50.890 --> 00:56:54.730
Speaker 1: just then, the the puberty re re returning.
00:56:54.730 --> 00:56:58.730
Speaker 1: The so I think that I I think that I'm
00:56:59.805 --> 00:57:02.925
Speaker 1: it's like I'm satisfied, but I'm also like, look at the time.
00:57:02.925 --> 00:57:04.125
Speaker 1: We've gotta wrap this thing up.
00:57:04.125 --> 00:57:07.485
Speaker 1: People aren't gonna wanna listen to us for an hour and forty five minutes.
00:57:07.485 --> 00:57:11.485
Speaker 1: So I feel like we're gonna have to if you're open to it.
00:57:11.950 --> 00:57:13.870
Speaker 1: Maybe it's like a three peat.
00:57:13.870 --> 00:57:16.430
Speaker 1: We we get another person on and, like, do a bit of a round
00:57:16.430 --> 00:57:16.910
Speaker 1: table.
00:57:16.910 --> 00:57:20.430
Speaker 1: I think I just love, like like you described at the outset, when you
00:57:20.430 --> 00:57:23.550
Speaker 1: put a microphone on and you have a conversation, there's just something that's really
00:57:23.550 --> 00:57:25.625
Speaker 1: nice about that.
00:57:25.625 --> 00:57:29.625
Speaker 1: And I haven't cared about what somebody might take away
00:57:29.865 --> 00:57:33.865
Speaker 1: from the conversation listening to it so much as just really enjoying the
00:57:33.865 --> 00:57:34.665
Speaker 1: conversation with you.
00:57:34.665 --> 00:57:37.625
Speaker 1: So I think it's been great.
00:57:37.625 --> 00:57:38.990
Speaker 0: Yeah.
00:57:38.990 --> 00:57:39.230
Speaker 0: Yeah.
00:57:39.230 --> 00:57:39.630
Speaker 0: Me too.
00:57:39.630 --> 00:57:40.990
Speaker 1: And it's my family and my whole family.
00:57:40.990 --> 00:57:44.030
Speaker 1: I want my whole family, when they listen to this, to, like, shout it
00:57:44.030 --> 00:57:48.030
Speaker 1: out on WhatsApp or WhatsApp group and be like, oh, Greg, piano man.
00:57:48.030 --> 00:57:48.590
Speaker 1: That was so great.
00:57:48.590 --> 00:57:51.310
Speaker 1: And then they'll they'll they'll they'll say, oh, you know, you use the f
00:57:51.310 --> 00:57:54.365
Speaker 1: word and I'll get, you know, get some harassment for that.
00:57:54.365 --> 00:57:56.205
Speaker 1: But I hope I get some props for that one.
00:57:56.205 --> 00:58:00.125
Speaker 1: Shout out to cousin Charles who introduced me to Piano Man.
00:58:00.125 --> 00:58:00.525
Speaker 0: Yeah.
00:58:00.525 --> 00:58:01.405
Speaker 0: It's interesting.
00:58:01.405 --> 00:58:05.085
Speaker 0: I you know, you mentioned the episode with Jake Gold and I've Mhmm.
00:58:05.085 --> 00:58:09.085
Speaker 0: And I had Alan Cross and I've and, John Bacon and these big names,
00:58:09.800 --> 00:58:13.800
Speaker 0: and I've really enjoyed that.
00:58:14.040 --> 00:58:18.040
Speaker 0: But sometimes I think these conversations, like the one we just had, is the
00:58:18.120 --> 00:58:19.480
Speaker 0: reason I started this.
00:58:19.480 --> 00:58:23.480
Speaker 0: Like, I I don't know There are four topics
00:58:23.675 --> 00:58:27.435
Speaker 0: that you and I might have stumbled across, one or two of them in
00:58:27.435 --> 00:58:29.515
Speaker 0: the next ten years.
00:58:29.515 --> 00:58:32.315
Speaker 0: How where else would these conversations live?
00:58:32.315 --> 00:58:34.440
Speaker 0: How else would they happen?
00:58:34.440 --> 00:58:35.160
Speaker 0: I don't Yeah.
00:58:35.160 --> 00:58:35.800
Speaker 0: Think they would.
00:58:35.800 --> 00:58:39.480
Speaker 0: And maybe the point of this podcast is just to reconnect with people in
00:58:39.480 --> 00:58:43.160
Speaker 0: my lives that I wish I spent more time with.
00:58:43.160 --> 00:58:44.520
Speaker 1: Thanks for that, Bob.
00:58:44.520 --> 00:58:47.435
Speaker 1: I appreciate making time to have that conversation with.
00:58:47.435 --> 00:58:51.435
Speaker 1: For for me to be one of those people means, definitely means something
00:58:52.795 --> 00:58:53.915
Speaker 1: to me.
00:58:53.915 --> 00:58:56.475
Speaker 1: And so I'm I'm grateful for that.
00:58:56.475 --> 00:59:00.315
Speaker 1: I think I do think that there's something to it too.
00:59:00.315 --> 00:59:03.410
Speaker 1: Here's here's just an interesting take I have.
00:59:03.410 --> 00:59:05.090
Speaker 1: I started listening to podcasts.
00:59:05.090 --> 00:59:08.770
Speaker 1: My first the first podcast I listened to is Tim Ferriss.
00:59:08.770 --> 00:59:12.770
Speaker 1: And I loved and still do love the way he asks
00:59:12.770 --> 00:59:13.905
Speaker 1: questions.
00:59:13.905 --> 00:59:17.905
Speaker 1: And I remember for a number of years after listening to to his podcast,
00:59:18.465 --> 00:59:22.465
Speaker 1: it changed how I it changed how I would have conversations with
00:59:22.465 --> 00:59:22.945
Speaker 1: people.
00:59:22.945 --> 00:59:25.025
Speaker 1: And I got feedback from time to time.
00:59:25.025 --> 00:59:27.345
Speaker 1: Oh, you have such great questions.
00:59:27.345 --> 00:59:31.345
Speaker 1: And I would I would attribute at least some of that
00:59:31.460 --> 00:59:35.460
Speaker 1: to just listening to that podcast.
00:59:35.460 --> 00:59:39.460
Speaker 1: So maybe, Bob, there's a mission here
00:59:39.620 --> 00:59:42.980
Speaker 1: that I think the world becomes a better place when people get better at
00:59:42.980 --> 00:59:46.715
Speaker 1: having real, genuine, authentic, and curious conversations.
00:59:46.715 --> 00:59:47.195
Speaker 1: I don't know.
00:59:47.195 --> 00:59:51.195
Speaker 1: The takeaway from for me, for anyone listening to this is if this helps
00:59:52.235 --> 00:59:55.115
Speaker 1: other people in in any way, like, take the questions we ask each other
00:59:55.115 --> 00:59:57.755
Speaker 1: and, you know, do something with that, I think that that I think that's
00:59:57.755 --> 00:59:59.030
Speaker 1: a win.
00:59:59.030 --> 01:00:01.350
Speaker 1: Like, I think that that is a a service to the world.
01:00:01.350 --> 01:00:05.350
Speaker 1: So credit to you for doing that, and I appreciate me being
01:00:05.510 --> 01:00:07.670
Speaker 1: one of the people you get to have a conversation with.
01:00:07.670 --> 01:00:07.990
Speaker 0: Yeah.
01:00:07.990 --> 01:00:10.070
Speaker 0: Well, I that's awesome.
01:00:10.070 --> 01:00:11.190
Speaker 0: I love that.
01:00:11.190 --> 01:00:14.435
Speaker 0: I feel like we should
01:00:14.435 --> 01:00:18.115
Speaker 0: point people if they've listened to this and
01:00:18.115 --> 01:00:22.115
Speaker 0: for if some somehow people are listening to this
01:00:22.195 --> 01:00:24.995
Speaker 0: conversation that don't already know you and me.
01:00:24.995 --> 01:00:25.955
Speaker 1: Yeah.
01:00:25.955 --> 01:00:29.120
Speaker 0: They can find more they can find out more about the work that you
01:00:29.120 --> 01:00:33.120
Speaker 0: and your, wife, Whitney, are doing at Vienna Waits at Vienna Waits dot
01:00:33.200 --> 01:00:37.200
Speaker 0: com, the unblocked podcast, which you've alluded to, which is actually really
01:00:37.280 --> 01:00:41.280
Speaker 0: good, the retreat that you've got coming up in Southern Ontario
01:00:41.360 --> 01:00:45.360
Speaker 0: in September, which is called Waypoint, which is a transformational,
01:00:47.255 --> 01:00:50.215
Speaker 0: experience for everybody that was there last year, and I can't wait to go
01:00:50.215 --> 01:00:50.615
Speaker 0: this year.
01:00:50.615 --> 01:00:52.295
Speaker 0: I mean, you guys are got a lot going on.
01:00:52.295 --> 01:00:55.495
Speaker 0: You talked about the newsletter, so I'll put all that stuff in the show
01:00:55.495 --> 01:00:57.380
Speaker 0: notes.
01:00:57.380 --> 01:00:58.020
Speaker 0: Anything else?
01:00:58.020 --> 01:01:01.060
Speaker 0: Anywhere else people can find you or anything else that people need to know
01:01:01.060 --> 01:01:02.580
Speaker 0: about you?
01:01:02.580 --> 01:01:05.940
Speaker 1: I think that that's very kind of you to to refer to all that.
01:01:05.940 --> 01:01:09.940
Speaker 1: I think, we welcome, you know, million
01:01:10.215 --> 01:01:14.215
Speaker 1: billionaire investor types, who wanna just contribute,
01:01:15.095 --> 01:01:19.095
Speaker 1: to to the to the group to just send us large checks.
01:01:19.415 --> 01:01:22.215
Speaker 1: You know, our our address is in the mail.
01:01:22.215 --> 01:01:22.415
Speaker 1: No.
01:01:22.375 --> 01:01:26.300
Speaker 1: I I think that our, like, our mission, I think is probably the thing
01:01:26.300 --> 01:01:29.820
Speaker 1: that I would come back to and anchor anchor this in.
01:01:29.820 --> 01:01:32.700
Speaker 1: And I think this is probably part of why I just don't feel that
01:01:32.700 --> 01:01:34.460
Speaker 1: jealous feeling anymore.
01:01:34.460 --> 01:01:37.245
Speaker 1: Our mission has become
01:01:37.245 --> 01:01:41.245
Speaker 1: so clear that we wanna help a million people just live more intentionally.
01:01:41.725 --> 01:01:45.245
Speaker 1: And to us, what that means is not just going through the motions of
01:01:45.245 --> 01:01:48.605
Speaker 1: life or doing something because you feel like you need to or because you
01:01:48.605 --> 01:01:52.605
Speaker 1: should, but choosing a way of of living.
01:01:52.820 --> 01:01:56.180
Speaker 1: And that might be choosing a job you don't love, but it is a
01:01:56.180 --> 01:01:58.100
Speaker 1: means to an end so you can care for others.
01:01:58.100 --> 01:02:02.100
Speaker 1: It doesn't mean, you know, burning the house down and and moving to
01:02:02.260 --> 01:02:03.220
Speaker 1: Costa Rica.
01:02:03.220 --> 01:02:06.645
Speaker 1: I think for us, it's just we have one life.
01:02:06.645 --> 01:02:09.845
Speaker 1: Make a choice to live it intentionally every day, and I think that that
01:02:09.845 --> 01:02:13.845
Speaker 1: makes everything better and unlocks more human potential.
01:02:13.845 --> 01:02:16.165
Speaker 1: And I think, Bob, you're one of those people, and we get to work
01:02:16.165 --> 01:02:18.725
Speaker 1: with you and and do that stuff with you.
01:02:18.725 --> 01:02:19.980
Speaker 1: We're we're on our way to a million people.
01:02:19.980 --> 01:02:21.820
Speaker 1: We wanna work with more and more and more people.
01:02:21.820 --> 01:02:25.820
Speaker 1: So check us out if you haven't learned about us already and we'd love
01:02:25.820 --> 01:02:29.340
Speaker 1: to get to know you, work with you, and maybe you can meet Bob
01:02:29.340 --> 01:02:32.435
Speaker 1: at, Waypoint twenty twenty six.
01:02:32.435 --> 01:02:33.315
Speaker 0: That's awesome.
01:02:33.315 --> 01:02:33.635
Speaker 0: Yeah.
01:02:33.635 --> 01:02:35.235
Speaker 0: Thanks so much for doing this, man.
01:02:35.235 --> 01:02:37.395
Speaker 0: And,
01:02:37.395 --> 01:02:38.915
Speaker 0: yeah, god, we covered a lot of ground.
01:02:38.915 --> 01:02:39.795
Speaker 0: This is amazing.
01:02:39.795 --> 01:02:43.715
Speaker 0: What the the best gift of these conversations is we're gonna hang up the
01:02:43.715 --> 01:02:44.115
Speaker 0: phone.
01:02:44.115 --> 01:02:44.790
Speaker 0: We're gonna go.
01:02:44.790 --> 01:02:46.710
Speaker 0: We're gonna jump back into our normal lives.
01:02:46.710 --> 01:02:49.990
Speaker 0: There's gonna be a couple of things about this conversation that definitely stick with
01:02:49.990 --> 01:02:53.510
Speaker 0: me and then I'll reflect on, but then it'll kind of fade.
01:02:53.510 --> 01:02:56.710
Speaker 0: And a month from now when it's time to release it, I get to
01:02:56.710 --> 01:02:58.230
Speaker 0: go back and listen to it again.
01:02:58.230 --> 01:02:59.830
Speaker 0: And it's like, oh my god.
01:02:59.830 --> 01:03:01.485
Speaker 0: This was so fucking good.
01:03:01.485 --> 01:03:02.765
Speaker 0: Like, it's I don't know.
01:03:02.765 --> 01:03:06.765
Speaker 0: It just I I podcasts are amazing way to keep
01:03:06.845 --> 01:03:10.845
Speaker 0: the not only to force these conversations from happening, but to
01:03:10.925 --> 01:03:13.910
Speaker 0: keep them alive and to keep them have a place where I can go
01:03:13.910 --> 01:03:15.430
Speaker 0: back and list listen to them again.
01:03:15.430 --> 01:03:17.990
Speaker 0: So I can't thank you enough.
01:03:17.990 --> 01:03:19.110
Speaker 1: Well, thanks for having me, Bob.
01:03:19.110 --> 01:03:19.990
Speaker 1: It's always a pleasure.
01:03:19.990 --> 01:03:23.990
Speaker 1: We'll do it again sometime.
01:03:24.390 --> 01:03:28.390
Speaker 0: The Girl With Mixtape podcast with Bob Mathers is produced by Bespoke Projects,
01:03:28.435 --> 01:03:30.675
Speaker 0: music by Jim Appel Walter Cronkite.
01:03:30.675 --> 01:03:33.875
Speaker 0: If you enjoyed this episode, please take a moment to follow and rate us.
01:03:33.875 --> 01:03:36.915
Speaker 0: When you do this, it helps to raise our podcast profile so that more
01:03:36.915 --> 01:03:38.035
Speaker 0: people can find us.
01:03:38.035 --> 01:03:40.835
Speaker 1: If you wanna connect, you can find me on LinkedIn using the link in
01:03:40.835 --> 01:03:43.710
Speaker 1: the show
01:03:43.710 --> 01:03:45.710
Speaker 1: notes.