Now That's What I Call Parenting Hell... Volume 11

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Hello I'm Rob Beckett and I'm Josh Willicombe. Welcome to Parenting.
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Hell the show in which Josh and I discuss what
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it's really like to be a parent which I would
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say can be a little tricky.
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So to make ourselves and hopefully you feel better about
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the trials and tribulations of modern day parenting each week
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we'll be chatting to a famous parent about how they're.
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Coping or hopefully how they're not coping.
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And we'll also be hearing from you the listener with
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your tips advice and of course tales of parenting.
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Woe because let's be honest there are plenty of times
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where none of us know what we're doing.
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Hello, I'm Rob Beckett.
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And I'm Josh Whittacombe. And you're listening to Now That's
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What I Call Parenting Hell.
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Cariad Lloyd, hello.
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Hello.
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How many children have you got, Cariad? I have two children.
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I'm trying not to swear too early.
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No, swear away.
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Oh, I've got two of the fuckers, because this morning
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was just... How old are they?
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So, I'm right in the midst of it, I suppose
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you'd say. Six and about to turn three.
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Oh, yeah.
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Oh, yeah. Similar to us.
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Yes.
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Bad morning, then?
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Wasn't actually that bad but at one point my daughter
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she's playing a new game called post post box where
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we have to write each other notes and she puts
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chairs everywhere and that's everyone's post button you have to
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write but obviously you're trying to get ready it's quite
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stressful she's like mommy you haven't left me a note
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and i'll say i'll just get dressed mommy you haven't
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left me a note i'm just gonna i'm just.
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Gonna literally put clothes.
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On yeah and she went i've left you a note
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i was like okay i'll read my note and it
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just was a sad face And it said, you know,
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in child's not proper spelling, mummy, will you play with me?
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Tick box, no, and then sad face. And I said, look,
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I'm really sorry, just give me a sec, give me
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a sec. And she said, there's another no. And then
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she'd just done a really unhappy face. And then I said, look,
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I'm sorry, because we're trying to get her brother out
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to nursery and he's.
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Much more reliability.
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So I was like, just give me a second. And
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she was lying on the sofa, like she does real drama.
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So she was lying on the sofa, just looking out
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the window like a 1920s heiress, like just nothing is good.
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And she said, there's another note. And I looked and
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it just said, mummy, you don't love me.
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That was it. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
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Because I hadn't played fucking post books.
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I was like.
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You should get a job at Royal Mail. That's how
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they treat their workers. Exactly. I'm on strike. Deal with it.
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If it makes you feel better, they do that to
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me and my wife as well. The eldest, who's seven now,
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will write things like, you make me sad, I hate you,
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and draw the sad crying face.
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Yeah, that's what she does, the sad face. Did we
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do that? I don't remember doing that. I did not
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do that. No.
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My mum would have gone, well, yeah, I don't because
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of your behaviour today.
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I feel like there's more pen and paper available in
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my house than there was in my house growing up.
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It feels like pen and paper. There's loads of it.
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We're like.
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Because I think there's always printer paper. But when we
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were growing up, there wasn't printer paper.
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Yes, that's what she does, grabs the bloody printer paper.
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Yeah.
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Although my dad worked from home and we did have
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a lot of... I used to steal the fax paper
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to date myself and him. But I was always told
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off because I think it was like, you couldn't Amazon
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a new ream, could you? Like, don't worry, babes, Amazon
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a new ream for tomorrow. It'd be like, that's expensive
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and we'll have to.
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Go to the shop.
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Yeah.
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Exactly.
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I think they've got too much access to pen and
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paper kids these days.
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Too much access.
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And then the small one, I left him alone for
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two minutes and he drew all over the wooden floor
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as well.
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The other thing this morning.
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I don't want to, like, I suppose I've complained enough
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on this show that I can have something that's gone
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my way.
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Okay.
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I've not had. Touch wood. Careful, careful. What are you
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about to say? Touch wood fucking out. They just sleep
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the night through. My daughter didn't draw on walls. No, no,
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my daughter didn't.
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And everyone seems to have had that.
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No, my son is doing it.
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But I didn't have that.
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This is the thing, yeah.
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Is it?
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How old is your youngest?
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He's 18 months.
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Have I dodged it? Right, mate.
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No, this is what happened to me. My daughter, I'd say,
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don't draw on the walls.
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She's the oldest one. She'd go, okay.
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And then he's just like... And now he's about to
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turn three.
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He's now drawing on things. I think there's still time
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for your child to draw on a wall at 18 months. Yeah,
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there's time, Josh.
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Yeah.
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He didn't draw on the walls at 18 months. He
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started in the last six months.
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Carrot, are they drawing on your blue walls or white?
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Have you got white walls? We've got white down the corridor.
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Is that where they do it?
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He just, tell you what, small corridor, he got two
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pens in either hand, just straight.
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Down either side of the wall.
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Just.
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Oh, my God.
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Yeah.
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And then this morning he just went on the wood.
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I think it's the white wall. Yes, yeah. You've got
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very different colour walls, Josh, in your house. That's true.
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Have you got any white?
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No, Rose wants to change the colour of our corridor
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because it's too dark. So do you think she's creating
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basically a canvas?
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We've got a lot of white walls and they look
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at that as big paper. It's big paper. It's just
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big paper. Big farmer, big paper.
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The other thing you can do, which we did do
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in lockdown actually, was.
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You know, those IKEA roll of paper. Yeah, they're fun.
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And then we stuck that.
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To the wall like both sides we just covered it
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halfway and then they just went nuts until they were
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bored and i haven't done that for a while and
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i thought i need to do the old paper on
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the side of the wall for a bit.
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Or have you taught them to draw on the wall
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i think.
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You're teasing them to the wall there lay that on
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the floor oh no they liked it you mad or
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in the garden in the summer.
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Yeah we don't have a garden so that things like
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sticking on the wall become quite like that's the most
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excitement or like drawing on the outside small balcony with
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chalk it's like What, do you want to do chalk?
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Chalk is a.
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Chalk is good, isn't it?
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Yeah, chalk's a winner, isn't it?
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At least it washes off as well with the chalk, so.
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My daughter came home from her friend's house on Sunday
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and she had just an A with a circle around
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it on her head, like she's kind of branded.
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Like an anarchist sign.
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Yeah, like an anarchist sign.
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Where was she? What was she meeting? She's mates with
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Swampy's kids, they live in East London. World-trending. Swampy works
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in media now.
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It's East London, isn't it, mate? But I just couldn't tell.
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I had no idea looking at the ink.
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It could have been blood. Oh, permanent, yeah, Sharpie.
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It could have been a Sharpie. And you're just like,
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if this is a Sharpie, what the fuck happens here now?
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Is it an Avengers, eh, or something?
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I don't think they're into the Avengers.
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You're being kind, aren't I? She's joined the anarchists. She's
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an anarchist. That's what's happened. No, I'll tell you what
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it was.
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She explained it that, She and her friend were the
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patients in the hospital. And her other friends were the
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nurses or the doctors.
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So labelling the patients, do not go near.
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Yeah, it's a bit traumatic, that sounds. Deep, deep drama.
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Yeah, she seemed quite happy with it. They'd also drawn
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like an X on her hand.
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Are you sure they're her friends?
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Mate, she's going down to protest. She's striking next week.
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That's what this is about.
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And then they just punch her.
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In the nose and it bleeds. And then they have
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to help her because they're the doctors. So how do
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you stop a three-year-old drawing on your walls, Karen? Can
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you tell off a three-year-old like that?
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Well, I don't know if you do, but I spend
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my life being like.
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Oh, don't, don't. Okay, don't, no, no.
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No, no.
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Don't worry, just go, just leave the room. Because he
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looks like an angel. I don't mean this, I know
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everyone says this, but he's got blonde curly hair. He
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looks like, to be fair, a very white Eurocentric person
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of an angel.
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Yeah, exactly. I know a hospital he could get a
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job in.
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Yeah, yeah.
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And he just looks at me like, like today with
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the pens, he was like, oh, I done that drawing.
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And then you can't really. shower that can you so
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i just sound like a twat i go what do
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we say pens are for paper aren't they pens are
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for paper and the floor is not paper but he's
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not saying.
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It i'm saying it like pens are for paper do
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you believe it as you say it no.
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The thing is with him he's oh he's such a
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liability honestly he's a rogue he's a cat he's.
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Absolutely bastard you have.
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To constantly say stuff to him over and over again
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like did you like you hear me where you're listening
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is where you're listening is and he can be three
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rooms away and you'll be like oh you know for
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his birthday we need to sort out the cake and
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he's like yeah i want chocolate cake and you're like
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you fucker like i follow you around being like did
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you hear me you need to put your shoes on
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you need to put your nothing so he's really my
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daughter's much more argumentative.
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Oh good which would you take over the options.
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I quite like the argumentative because at least you know
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they're listening. So if you say, put your shoes on,
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she's like, I don't want to, and I'm not going to.
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And you feel like, okay, we can have a conversation,
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like you're engaged with me. Whereas him, you're like, I
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don't know if he knows I'm here.
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Like, is he awake? What's happening? It's just like complete bubble.
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Do you have that with TV?
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Oh God, yeah.
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If my daughter's watching TV, it's, fucking insane how close
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I can be to her and she isn't hearing me speak.
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I can't believe this is happening. How she can tune
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in on it And I believe she's doing it. I
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don't believe she's playing me.
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No, I think they genuinely can't hear you at points.
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And also, it depends what you're competing with as well.
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We say so much shit to them.
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Yes, exactly. Brush your teeth, shoes on, upstairs, every day
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on your own. What do you want to eat?
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I'm surprised they don't just scream at us, fuck off,
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leave me alone.
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They do.
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00:08:57.750 --> 00:08:59.929
They draw on the floor and go, this is my
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way of saying, fuck you.
254
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Fucking giving it all that all morning.
255
00:09:03.120 --> 00:09:07.169
Or they write you notes and say, you don't love me. Yeah,
256
00:09:07.289 --> 00:09:09.029
it's just difficult, isn't it, when, I mean, it's a
257
00:09:09.070 --> 00:09:11.340
stupid thing to say, but when two kids are very different,
258
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you're constantly having to re-evaluate your parenting. Because you're like, well,
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00:09:14.960 --> 00:09:16.960
this worked for six years, and now it doesn't.
260
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So you're like, oh, shit, what do I have to
261
00:09:18.580 --> 00:09:21.169
do with you? Like, oh, I've got to think about it.
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00:09:21.529 --> 00:09:23.970
Fuck off. Do they play together? Do they get on well?
263
00:09:24.590 --> 00:09:25.669
They get on really well.
264
00:09:25.929 --> 00:09:26.629
Yeah, I'm lucky.
265
00:09:26.690 --> 00:09:28.669
They get on really well. Maybe this is a lockdown thing.
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They had a lot of time together.
267
00:09:30.389 --> 00:09:30.669
Yeah.
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00:09:30.830 --> 00:09:32.970
He was born five days before the lockdown.
269
00:09:33.090 --> 00:09:34.870
Wow. Oh, my word.
270
00:09:34.950 --> 00:09:35.190
Yes.
271
00:09:35.309 --> 00:09:37.409
Oh, talk us through that for a couple.
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Of months then.
273
00:09:38.210 --> 00:09:39.769
Well, I listen to this show a lot, actually.
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I found it quite helpful with that beginning bit when
275
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I was like, what?
276
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But not the later episodes. OK. Sure, OK.
277
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Whatever, yeah.
278
00:09:45.559 --> 00:09:46.700
I was fine then. Yeah, I was fine.
279
00:09:46.779 --> 00:09:48.500
The early ones were really, I don't know, they had
280
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the freshness of it.
281
00:09:49.879 --> 00:09:51.039
Yeah, yeah. OK, whatever.
282
00:09:51.080 --> 00:09:52.539
It's a difficult second album, OK?
283
00:09:52.820 --> 00:09:53.279
Yeah, difficult.
284
00:09:53.320 --> 00:09:53.610
It's a bit.
285
00:09:54.100 --> 00:09:57.139
No, she was about three-ish when the lockdown happened.
286
00:09:57.159 --> 00:09:59.450
And I was pregnant when it all began.
287
00:09:59.470 --> 00:09:59.529
No.
288
00:10:00.070 --> 00:10:00.350
Sorry.
289
00:10:00.389 --> 00:10:02.549
When it was like sort of the January, it was like, oh,
290
00:10:02.620 --> 00:10:05.539
what's this? And then he had to be elective C-section
291
00:10:05.559 --> 00:10:07.980
because he was so massive. Like he is also a giant,
292
00:10:08.059 --> 00:10:10.919
a giant cherub. You need to imagine a giant drunk cherub.
293
00:10:11.039 --> 00:10:15.279
How big was he? He was nearly 10 pounds. And I,
294
00:10:15.299 --> 00:10:17.419
you've met me. I'm not at all big person. I'm
295
00:10:17.440 --> 00:10:19.940
a small person. You're not a 10 pound carrier, Carrie.
296
00:10:19.960 --> 00:10:21.379
I don't tell you that. No, I'm not.
297
00:10:21.500 --> 00:10:22.000
I'm not.
298
00:10:22.019 --> 00:10:24.309
My body was not made. You meet some people, you go,
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00:10:24.309 --> 00:10:26.049
you can handle that. She can take a 10 pounder,
300
00:10:26.110 --> 00:10:27.190
but not you, Karen, I don't think.
301
00:10:27.470 --> 00:10:29.909
They made me go in for scans every single week
302
00:10:30.029 --> 00:10:33.129
because they refused to believe I didn't have gestational diabetes.
303
00:10:33.210 --> 00:10:35.509
They kept saying, who tested you? This can't be right.
304
00:10:35.610 --> 00:10:37.509
They said, he's so big. He's so big.
305
00:10:37.529 --> 00:10:39.769
This is mad. I was like, stop saying this to
306
00:10:39.809 --> 00:10:43.029
your friend, that woman. He's a freak. Yeah.
307
00:10:43.330 --> 00:10:45.210
And then with the last scan, she went, what are
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00:10:45.230 --> 00:10:45.690
your plans?
309
00:10:45.710 --> 00:10:46.889
I was like, don't worry, I'm going to have a lecture.
310
00:10:46.909 --> 00:10:50.620
She was like, I have to say, I have to
311
00:10:50.700 --> 00:10:54.259
strongly advise you not to try and do this naturally.
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00:10:54.279 --> 00:10:59.129
I was like, Well, firstly, it's vaginally not naturally, but
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00:10:59.460 --> 00:11:01.659
also I was like, no, don't worry. She was like, God,
314
00:11:01.720 --> 00:11:04.879
thank God, because that, yeah, you can't, no one should.
315
00:11:05.629 --> 00:11:06.289
All right, good luck.
316
00:11:07.970 --> 00:11:08.309
Okay.
317
00:11:08.990 --> 00:11:12.190
But yeah. So it's vaginally the correct term, not naturally.
318
00:11:12.269 --> 00:11:15.129
Because naturally sounds like, so I've had two C-sections and
319
00:11:15.169 --> 00:11:16.830
naturally makes it sound like, well, you did it the
320
00:11:16.870 --> 00:11:19.789
weird way, didn't you? The freaky way, not natural. So
321
00:11:19.809 --> 00:11:23.669
you're supposed to say vaginally or C-section. But they all
322
00:11:23.690 --> 00:11:25.529
say to you, did you have it naturally? And you're like, no,
323
00:11:25.549 --> 00:11:27.100
I had it with the evil of science.
324
00:11:27.149 --> 00:11:27.789
I do apologise.
325
00:11:27.820 --> 00:11:27.909
Yeah.
326
00:11:28.750 --> 00:11:30.460
I just find i don't know why but maybe it's
327
00:11:30.500 --> 00:11:34.419
because i'm immature but just starting the word vaginally.
328
00:11:33.580 --> 00:11:35.700
I know it's not great is it you've.
329
00:11:35.539 --> 00:11:37.769
Got to get to the innerly so quick if you're
330
00:11:37.789 --> 00:11:41.750
a doctor vaginally like vag is such a terrible word
331
00:11:41.870 --> 00:11:43.370
but like as long as you get.
332
00:11:43.070 --> 00:11:45.429
I don't like it but i equally don't want someone
333
00:11:45.480 --> 00:11:47.039
to constantly say to me oh you didn't have it
334
00:11:47.100 --> 00:11:49.460
naturally because then you're like well i Aliens didn't come
335
00:11:49.480 --> 00:11:51.759
down and take me away. It was like, did you
336
00:11:51.820 --> 00:11:53.950
have it naturally or did the magic of science save
337
00:11:53.970 --> 00:11:55.149
your life would be a better way.
338
00:11:55.529 --> 00:11:56.009
Yes, very nice.
339
00:11:56.029 --> 00:11:57.320
That's a nice way of doing it.
340
00:11:57.350 --> 00:11:57.809
That's nice.
341
00:11:57.850 --> 00:12:00.809
Yeah, maybe we don't need to make the natural bird. Yeah, vaginally,
342
00:12:00.830 --> 00:12:03.450
we need to change C-sections and make it sound magic.
343
00:12:03.470 --> 00:12:05.509
I think vaginally needs a rebrand. Yeah, it does. I
344
00:12:05.529 --> 00:12:08.669
get the message, but I think it's a tough first syllable.
345
00:12:08.690 --> 00:12:11.049
It's a tough first syllable you keep saying, Rob.
346
00:12:12.960 --> 00:12:13.629
Yeah, stop saying it.
347
00:12:13.659 --> 00:12:16.289
No, no, I've heard the word vag from your... I
348
00:12:16.309 --> 00:12:17.809
don't like saying vag. I keep saying vag.
349
00:12:17.830 --> 00:12:20.419
Stop saying it. Stop saying it, Josh. Sorry, this is
350
00:12:20.460 --> 00:12:21.340
very childish.
351
00:12:21.700 --> 00:12:22.840
Can I ask a question?
352
00:12:23.200 --> 00:12:27.259
Is your husband big? Yes, he's six foot four. Right,
353
00:12:27.460 --> 00:12:28.059
that makes sense.
354
00:12:28.080 --> 00:12:30.519
But they literally don't care. You go, come on, look
355
00:12:30.539 --> 00:12:33.299
at him. I kept saying, he'd come to scans and
356
00:12:33.340 --> 00:12:35.460
I'd be, well, I mean, it's not surprising. And they'd go, yeah,
357
00:12:35.480 --> 00:12:37.950
we only take your height and weight into consideration.
358
00:12:38.019 --> 00:12:40.779
And I was like, this isn't a virgin birth. I
359
00:12:40.799 --> 00:12:41.779
didn't do this by myself.
360
00:12:41.799 --> 00:12:44.710
Like, look at the size of him. Honestly, you scan
361
00:12:44.750 --> 00:12:46.730
every week. They were like, oh yeah, maybe that's why,
362
00:12:46.750 --> 00:12:47.649
because he's quite big.
363
00:12:47.690 --> 00:12:51.070
And I was like, you think? So, yeah, he was massive.
364
00:12:51.309 --> 00:12:52.690
I do find that happens sometimes.
365
00:12:52.980 --> 00:12:55.919
It happens in our family where Lou's mum will always go, oh,
366
00:12:55.940 --> 00:12:58.179
my God, your daughters, they look so much like... And
367
00:12:58.200 --> 00:13:02.259
she'll list, like, her children and her family. And I go, oh, yeah,
368
00:13:02.299 --> 00:13:03.840
but I think she looks a little bit like my
369
00:13:03.899 --> 00:13:04.700
brother did when he was.
370
00:13:04.720 --> 00:13:05.340
She'll go, nah, nah.
371
00:13:05.399 --> 00:13:05.659
No.
372
00:13:05.710 --> 00:13:06.259
Nah, nah, nah.
373
00:13:06.279 --> 00:13:07.769
I don't know what.
374
00:13:07.870 --> 00:13:08.059
It's 50-50.
375
00:13:08.149 --> 00:13:09.950
I don't... They came out of Lou's.
376
00:13:10.269 --> 00:13:11.129
She's pure Watts.
377
00:13:11.450 --> 00:13:14.429
Your children are pure Watts, Rob. Whatever you want, Teresa.
378
00:13:14.450 --> 00:13:14.929
Whatever you want.
379
00:13:15.309 --> 00:13:15.889
I know.
380
00:13:15.909 --> 00:13:17.850
I had friends do that to me as well. When
381
00:13:17.889 --> 00:13:20.129
my daughter was young, they'd go, she just looks like
382
00:13:20.309 --> 00:13:22.330
your husband. And I'd be like, it's a bit like me. No,
383
00:13:22.669 --> 00:13:24.809
nothing of you. Can't see it. Absolutely can't see it.
384
00:13:24.830 --> 00:13:27.450
And you go, wow, I feel shit when you say that.
385
00:13:27.750 --> 00:13:28.490
I feel really shit.
386
00:13:29.090 --> 00:13:30.710
Well, what I used to get is, when they were
387
00:13:30.789 --> 00:13:32.330
badly behaved, they'd go, oh, it's a bit of the
388
00:13:32.350 --> 00:13:33.250
dad coming out now.
389
00:13:33.450 --> 00:13:34.570
Oh, what, so they don't look like me? And when
390
00:13:34.590 --> 00:13:36.409
they're a prick, it's more of a fool. Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah.
391
00:13:37.080 --> 00:13:39.000
I've got loads of ADHD in my family, so when
392
00:13:39.019 --> 00:13:40.889
they're really hyper, everyone's like, oh, well, we know where
393
00:13:40.909 --> 00:13:41.629
that's from.
394
00:13:42.629 --> 00:13:43.809
Oh, great. Thanks, guys.
395
00:13:43.830 --> 00:13:47.809
I'm the same with depression, though. In my family. What
396
00:13:47.850 --> 00:13:49.870
mental health problem are you bringing to the table?
397
00:13:49.889 --> 00:13:54.509
Yeah, what damage have I put into their body DNA-wise.
398
00:13:53.610 --> 00:13:55.649
Before the world's even had an attempt at them? It's
399
00:13:55.669 --> 00:13:56.870
not fair, is it? Because in the olden days, you
400
00:13:56.889 --> 00:13:57.289
wouldn't know.
401
00:13:57.309 --> 00:13:59.350
You'd just be like, oh, they're a bit boisterous, nothing
402
00:13:59.389 --> 00:13:59.750
to do with me.
403
00:13:59.789 --> 00:14:01.850
But now you're like, oh, no, we've all been diagnosed. Oh,
404
00:14:01.889 --> 00:14:02.950
he just likes.
405
00:14:05.090 --> 00:14:06.029
A drink.
406
00:14:06.070 --> 00:14:08.350
He's jolly. And then he does get sad, doesn't he?
407
00:14:08.389 --> 00:14:10.389
He gets a bit sad when he's had too much.
408
00:14:10.789 --> 00:14:12.120
He shouldn't have too much, that's all.
409
00:14:12.519 --> 00:14:14.740
So what was your sub on the percentile thing? Because
410
00:14:14.759 --> 00:14:16.139
I love that word as well. It's the only word
411
00:14:16.179 --> 00:14:18.500
you ever hear with babies, the percentile.
412
00:14:18.500 --> 00:14:23.669
99. 99 percentile. 99 percentile. Whoa, the big one. The
413
00:14:23.710 --> 00:14:25.669
big one. And then 95th for weight.
414
00:14:26.090 --> 00:14:26.590
Really?
415
00:14:26.610 --> 00:14:26.809
Yeah.
416
00:14:26.929 --> 00:14:28.490
And he's still, you have to go in there too,
417
00:14:28.610 --> 00:14:30.789
you know, to get like measured. And the woman was like, oh,
418
00:14:30.809 --> 00:14:32.750
I have to, I have to keep rolling out my
419
00:14:32.809 --> 00:14:35.000
paper because you have to lie him down to measure them.
420
00:14:35.120 --> 00:14:35.340
Oh.
421
00:14:37.649 --> 00:14:39.350
So she's three and a half years older than him.
422
00:14:39.379 --> 00:14:41.500
He's nearly as tall as her. They wear the same
423
00:14:41.559 --> 00:14:42.059
size shoes.
424
00:14:42.139 --> 00:14:43.340
So that's my brother Joe.
425
00:14:43.360 --> 00:14:45.559
He's like six foot three, six foot four, but also
426
00:14:45.659 --> 00:14:47.860
just a big guy, big shoulders, big arms, big hands,
427
00:14:47.879 --> 00:14:49.809
just big. And when my mum took him when he
428
00:14:49.830 --> 00:14:51.590
was about two to the doctors to measure him, and
429
00:14:51.610 --> 00:14:53.750
they measure their head, their height.
430
00:14:53.990 --> 00:14:56.169
She tried to measure his head. I was like, oh,
431
00:14:56.210 --> 00:14:58.649
the graph's not big enough. My mum was like, okay.
432
00:14:58.820 --> 00:15:00.659
She went, well, I can't make his head smaller, so...
433
00:15:01.320 --> 00:15:02.779
You're going to have to get a bigger bit of
434
00:15:02.799 --> 00:15:04.200
baby roll. You're going to have to work it. So
435
00:15:04.240 --> 00:15:05.360
I think he was like the 105th.
436
00:15:05.399 --> 00:15:08.279
Oh, my God. Yeah, he's got a giant head. Yeah,
437
00:15:08.340 --> 00:15:09.259
that's what I've heard.
438
00:15:09.419 --> 00:15:12.159
What's funny about having a giant one is it makes
439
00:15:12.250 --> 00:15:13.230
everyone really happy.
440
00:15:13.309 --> 00:15:15.389
Like nurses and midwives, they love you. Oh, he's a
441
00:15:15.429 --> 00:15:17.610
lovely big one. Oh, he's a big one, isn't he?
442
00:15:17.909 --> 00:15:20.049
He's good. When he had his injections, they went, they
443
00:15:20.090 --> 00:15:20.889
don't cry, big ones.
444
00:15:21.110 --> 00:15:21.590
They don't cry.
445
00:15:21.610 --> 00:15:23.909
They're lovely. And it's such a genius. Oh, was it true?
446
00:15:24.000 --> 00:15:25.500
Because their thighs are so fat.
447
00:15:25.879 --> 00:15:27.460
So when they put the needle in, it's just they
448
00:15:27.480 --> 00:15:27.960
don't really.
449
00:15:27.860 --> 00:15:29.080
Notice it happening as much.
450
00:15:29.120 --> 00:15:32.460
Because obviously thin ones, it's like it's more painful. And
451
00:15:32.480 --> 00:15:34.720
obviously they're worried. Obviously it's horrible if your baby's underweight.
452
00:15:34.759 --> 00:15:35.340
It's stressful.
453
00:15:35.419 --> 00:15:38.220
Whereas if you're overweight, they literally would take one look
454
00:15:38.240 --> 00:15:39.539
at him and go, oh, he's.
455
00:15:39.460 --> 00:15:40.320
Fine, isn't he?
456
00:15:40.340 --> 00:15:42.799
Oh, big strong boy. Yeah, big strong boy. He's a
457
00:15:42.820 --> 00:15:44.879
big strong boy. Big strong lad. And I'd be like,
458
00:15:45.860 --> 00:15:47.580
what would you say if he was a girl? It'd
459
00:15:47.639 --> 00:15:48.259
be like stressing.
460
00:15:48.279 --> 00:15:48.700
Big girl.
461
00:15:48.759 --> 00:15:50.970
Big strong girl. Oh, big girl. Oh, big girl.
462
00:15:50.990 --> 00:15:51.250
Yeah.
463
00:15:54.860 --> 00:15:58.019
Welcome to the podcast, Scott Bennett. Thank you very much, Scott.
464
00:15:58.200 --> 00:15:59.500
Thank you. Thank you for having me.
465
00:15:59.860 --> 00:16:01.879
It's an early one, isn't it? It is.
466
00:16:01.899 --> 00:16:04.620
I was just saying before we got started, when this
467
00:16:04.659 --> 00:16:06.580
came through and it said 9am, I was.
468
00:16:06.519 --> 00:16:09.539
Like, what the fuck is wrong with these guys?
469
00:16:09.799 --> 00:16:11.700
Do you know what I genuinely thought? That you two
470
00:16:11.720 --> 00:16:17.309
were in Australia. LAUGHTER That was the only thing that
471
00:16:17.350 --> 00:16:19.460
made sense to me. I thought, well, they're in Australia.
472
00:16:19.500 --> 00:16:21.840
It'll be like 10 o'clock at night there. We're all
473
00:16:21.899 --> 00:16:24.879
rock and roll comics. And they were like, no, it's genuinely,
474
00:16:25.139 --> 00:16:26.840
we're going out before the end.
475
00:16:26.759 --> 00:16:27.860
Of GB News.
476
00:16:27.899 --> 00:16:29.799
That's what we're doing.
477
00:16:29.830 --> 00:16:33.610
Not GB News. Adil Ray is still discussing politics.
478
00:16:33.929 --> 00:16:35.889
This is a thing for anyone else, but for parents,
479
00:16:35.990 --> 00:16:38.769
nine o'clock is like, no, that makes complete sense.
480
00:16:38.850 --> 00:16:39.370
You've been up.
481
00:16:39.450 --> 00:16:40.129
Well, yeah.
482
00:16:40.149 --> 00:16:40.690
Three hours.
483
00:16:40.730 --> 00:16:42.169
To be fair. This is how you get to the
484
00:16:42.210 --> 00:16:45.190
top of podcasting, mate. You start early. We're doing 16
485
00:16:45.190 --> 00:16:49.690
episodes today. We will be working till 10pm.
486
00:16:49.830 --> 00:16:52.289
Not many people know that me and Rob record all
487
00:16:52.309 --> 00:16:54.190
of Parenting Health for a year in the space of
488
00:16:54.250 --> 00:16:54.649
a week.
489
00:16:54.970 --> 00:16:58.570
And then we just have 51 weeks off. Oh, we
490
00:16:58.590 --> 00:17:00.480
have you now. We've just done a few acts in
491
00:17:00.500 --> 00:17:02.299
Hong Kong and then we're going.
492
00:17:01.960 --> 00:17:04.279
To wait for LA to go live and then we'll
493
00:17:04.299 --> 00:17:05.440
be doing all the LA guys.
494
00:17:05.529 --> 00:17:06.970
It was a 24-hour process.
495
00:17:07.009 --> 00:17:09.230
This is a worse contract than working for Amazon.
496
00:17:09.250 --> 00:17:14.490
LAUGHTER I do sometimes think, you know, Rob, you've got
497
00:17:14.529 --> 00:17:15.869
a job that you love and you get to pick
498
00:17:15.890 --> 00:17:16.410
your hours.
499
00:17:16.470 --> 00:17:18.650
Why the fuck are you doing this at 9am?
500
00:17:19.009 --> 00:17:20.789
Well, the mad thing is, is I said to you
501
00:17:20.819 --> 00:17:23.740
that my kids are on holiday. They're in bed. They've
502
00:17:23.779 --> 00:17:25.279
just hit full student mode.
503
00:17:25.500 --> 00:17:26.759
So they're not even awake, your kids?
504
00:17:26.819 --> 00:17:29.319
No, my seven-year-old doesn't surface till 10.
505
00:17:29.319 --> 00:17:29.380
Oh.
506
00:17:30.140 --> 00:17:33.859
It just comes down like a student.
507
00:17:33.880 --> 00:17:35.119
Well, it's been great to have you on, Scott, but
508
00:17:35.140 --> 00:17:36.359
I think we're going to have to end it there.
509
00:17:36.420 --> 00:17:38.599
I don't think I can handle a full episode of
510
00:17:38.640 --> 00:17:39.609
your daughter waking up.
511
00:17:39.640 --> 00:17:40.849
What time is she going to bed?
512
00:17:40.869 --> 00:17:41.700
I don't know.
513
00:17:41.980 --> 00:17:45.789
I don't know what time she's going to bed. Every
514
00:17:45.849 --> 00:17:48.609
question you're answering then, how old or what time she
515
00:17:48.630 --> 00:17:50.450
goes to bed, he said, don't know.
516
00:17:50.789 --> 00:17:53.329
Can I just say, it's gone a bit lax this week.
517
00:17:53.430 --> 00:17:54.329
Right, right, okay.
518
00:17:54.369 --> 00:17:56.210
We've sort of, it's drifted.
519
00:17:56.900 --> 00:17:57.180
Yeah.
520
00:17:57.380 --> 00:18:00.369
To be fair, it's only Thursday. It's not like week
521
00:18:00.430 --> 00:18:01.849
four of the summer holidays.
522
00:18:02.170 --> 00:18:02.529
I know.
523
00:18:02.910 --> 00:18:05.349
Well, the problem was is that they've started sleeping. My
524
00:18:05.430 --> 00:18:08.109
eldest tends to look after the youngest in the morning.
525
00:18:08.170 --> 00:18:11.130
So she'll sort of get her breakfast for her because the.
526
00:18:11.250 --> 00:18:11.940
Eldest is 12.
527
00:18:11.930 --> 00:18:13.819
And me and Gemma were laid next to each other
528
00:18:13.839 --> 00:18:15.420
last week. It was like a Sunday.
529
00:18:15.759 --> 00:18:18.119
And I was like, my God, it's like half 10.
530
00:18:18.119 --> 00:18:20.079
And we could hear them downstairs. And she was like, oh,
531
00:18:20.099 --> 00:18:22.359
this is brilliant, isn't it? They're looking after each other.
532
00:18:22.380 --> 00:18:23.319
I was like, well, it's not.
533
00:18:23.339 --> 00:18:23.640
It's neglect.
534
00:18:23.680 --> 00:18:23.960
It's neglect.
535
00:18:26.079 --> 00:18:29.660
It's just bad parenting mate it's shaking near the eldest
536
00:18:29.789 --> 00:18:31.400
boiling pans.
537
00:18:31.210 --> 00:18:34.470
Yeah boiling pans at 8am going for fuck's sake two
538
00:18:34.509 --> 00:18:37.329
more hours until she's down for breakfast fully laid out
539
00:18:37.369 --> 00:18:39.309
table livid.
540
00:18:38.869 --> 00:18:40.329
So what time what time do they go to bed
541
00:18:40.349 --> 00:18:43.309
at the moment uh don't panic i'm not from the council.
542
00:18:42.970 --> 00:18:44.890
Youngest is i know it does feel like i'm being
543
00:18:44.910 --> 00:18:47.490
judged now i would say 10 for the youngest.
544
00:18:49.220 --> 00:18:49.960
Is that too late?
545
00:18:50.259 --> 00:18:52.460
Let's rein it back at night.
546
00:18:52.509 --> 00:18:54.670
What, like when you're filling in how much alcohol units
547
00:18:54.710 --> 00:18:55.630
you do at the doctor?
548
00:18:55.650 --> 00:18:58.509
Let's go for what's acceptable. I'll put in the truth
549
00:18:58.569 --> 00:18:59.289
and acceptable.
550
00:18:59.369 --> 00:19:02.819
What are the units for 15 pints Friday and Saturday?
551
00:19:02.880 --> 00:19:04.220
How many units is that, Doc?
552
00:19:05.099 --> 00:19:07.180
If you were a doctor, I'd say seven, but.
553
00:19:07.259 --> 00:19:07.920
Seven pints.
554
00:19:08.099 --> 00:19:09.740
No, they're never going to bed at 7, 10 p.m.
555
00:19:09.900 --> 00:19:11.559
I think 10 p.m. is a bit late, but it's
556
00:19:11.660 --> 00:19:14.000
Easter holidays. I think you can be let off. And also,
557
00:19:14.339 --> 00:19:16.759
you've got a 12-year-old, so it's very difficult to.
558
00:19:16.720 --> 00:19:19.359
Get the youngest to do what the eldest was doing
559
00:19:19.380 --> 00:19:20.059
when they were seven.
560
00:19:20.180 --> 00:19:22.799
Yeah, and they sort of squirrel away. And I put up,
561
00:19:22.940 --> 00:19:24.460
I mean, this is my life at the moment. I
562
00:19:24.480 --> 00:19:27.349
put up some LED lights in a bedroom the other day,
563
00:19:27.380 --> 00:19:27.920
my oldest.
564
00:19:28.460 --> 00:19:30.960
Now, this is the thing, apparently. You can control them
565
00:19:31.009 --> 00:19:31.609
with a phone.
566
00:19:31.670 --> 00:19:34.329
So what I've done is I've combined keeping her awake
567
00:19:34.609 --> 00:19:38.410
with a device. So it's perfect parenting. So she has
568
00:19:38.430 --> 00:19:40.549
to turn her lights off with her phone, which is
569
00:19:40.569 --> 00:19:40.869
really good.
570
00:19:40.890 --> 00:19:41.619
That's an excellent one.
571
00:19:41.670 --> 00:19:42.960
I think they say that, don't they?
572
00:19:43.000 --> 00:19:45.079
It's a good way to calm down before bed, to
573
00:19:45.119 --> 00:19:47.269
be in charge of a lighting rig from your phone
574
00:19:47.829 --> 00:19:48.000
at 12.
575
00:19:47.990 --> 00:19:51.420
Yeah, to be a roadie for... pink flies before you
576
00:19:51.440 --> 00:19:53.220
nod off that's what I was doing the other day
577
00:19:53.240 --> 00:19:55.500
was putting lights up in the bedroom I.
578
00:19:55.460 --> 00:19:56.809
Don't know if you get this, Scott, but I get
579
00:19:56.920 --> 00:19:59.650
a slight lockdown flashbacks when the kids are off school.
580
00:19:59.789 --> 00:20:00.309
Definitely.
581
00:20:00.410 --> 00:20:02.509
You know, like when they're off over Easter and you're
582
00:20:02.529 --> 00:20:04.650
not on holiday or you're not doing anything fun that day,
583
00:20:04.690 --> 00:20:06.509
you're sort of in the house looking at each other.
584
00:20:06.529 --> 00:20:08.569
I start getting panicked after going to check the news
585
00:20:08.829 --> 00:20:10.950
in case we're not allowed in the nan round.
586
00:20:10.970 --> 00:20:12.910
I think Gemma gets a bit annoyed with me because
587
00:20:12.950 --> 00:20:14.380
I'm one of those people that I feel like I
588
00:20:14.410 --> 00:20:15.430
need a plan for the day.
589
00:20:15.450 --> 00:20:16.880
I don't know if you guys are like that, but
590
00:20:17.200 --> 00:20:18.180
I feel like we have to have.
591
00:20:18.400 --> 00:20:20.299
You're talking to two guys that have organised a podcast
592
00:20:20.359 --> 00:20:21.059
at 9am, I think.
593
00:20:21.079 --> 00:20:22.039
Yeah, 9am.
594
00:20:22.079 --> 00:20:23.940
You certainly didn't need a plan when we gave you one,
595
00:20:23.980 --> 00:20:24.319
did you?
596
00:20:24.980 --> 00:20:25.529
You're livid.
597
00:20:26.269 --> 00:20:27.890
But, I mean, it's just like the idea of, like,
598
00:20:27.910 --> 00:20:29.549
we need to be doing something. We've got to get
599
00:20:29.730 --> 00:20:32.650
out at some point, get on the bikes. I just
600
00:20:32.690 --> 00:20:34.740
had the idea of... I can see in the shed,
601
00:20:34.799 --> 00:20:37.640
these bikes I got, I'm just decaying. It's like, you know,
602
00:20:37.660 --> 00:20:39.980
you drive a car off the forecourt. It's like those
603
00:20:40.039 --> 00:20:42.940
bikes are losing value on an hourly rate.
604
00:20:42.960 --> 00:20:45.440
I feel like that, but it's hard to try and
605
00:20:45.460 --> 00:20:47.869
get them in the park. It's so wet and cold.
606
00:20:48.009 --> 00:20:48.430
Yeah.
607
00:20:48.490 --> 00:20:50.529
Even now, it's a bit slippy and it's a bit cold.
608
00:20:50.549 --> 00:20:51.890
They don't want to ride a bike in this. We
609
00:20:51.910 --> 00:20:53.869
get about two weeks a year where it's bike riding
610
00:20:53.890 --> 00:20:54.869
weather for kids, really.
611
00:20:54.890 --> 00:20:55.049
Yeah.
612
00:20:55.250 --> 00:20:56.910
And I think Gemma always thinks I'm going through this
613
00:20:56.970 --> 00:20:59.119
checklist of how to be a perfect parent.
614
00:20:59.150 --> 00:21:02.259
But I'm just like, it's three o'clock and we haven't moved.
615
00:21:02.319 --> 00:21:02.900
Yeah.
616
00:21:03.660 --> 00:21:04.460
It's not normal.
617
00:21:04.619 --> 00:21:06.440
But to be fair, they've only been up for two hours.
618
00:21:06.460 --> 00:21:08.740
They've certainly just finished breakfast, Scott.
619
00:21:09.259 --> 00:21:11.799
Well, breakfast just goes into dinner. That's what we do.
620
00:21:11.839 --> 00:21:14.420
It just, every meal just, you know. You know, can't
621
00:21:14.460 --> 00:21:16.369
go out now. It's evening meal time.
622
00:21:16.809 --> 00:21:18.890
You do a podcast with your wife, Gemma.
623
00:21:19.029 --> 00:21:20.289
Where are you now, though? It looks like you're in
624
00:21:20.349 --> 00:21:23.930
a garden shed. Is this your own podcast booth? And
625
00:21:23.970 --> 00:21:26.650
you also do a podcast with Gemma that's filmed in
626
00:21:26.690 --> 00:21:26.890
the house.
627
00:21:26.910 --> 00:21:30.670
You've got proper stuff up. You've got foam on the ceiling.
628
00:21:31.190 --> 00:21:34.069
Yeah. So what happened was when I quit my job,
629
00:21:34.589 --> 00:21:37.190
my proper job Gemma said what was that I was
630
00:21:37.230 --> 00:21:40.119
a product designer so I had like a career in everything.
631
00:21:39.839 --> 00:21:41.970
Oh yeah of course yeah and uh I should know
632
00:21:42.019 --> 00:21:43.400
that because you told us that when you did the
633
00:21:43.440 --> 00:21:45.220
live shows of us Scott it's all right.
634
00:21:45.180 --> 00:21:47.440
Glad I made an impact and so when I quit
635
00:21:47.460 --> 00:21:49.099
my job Gemma said well you'll need a place to
636
00:21:49.140 --> 00:21:51.720
write so I came home from work the week I'd
637
00:21:51.779 --> 00:21:52.880
quit and this was in the.
638
00:21:52.839 --> 00:21:54.599
Garden she'd had this shed put.
639
00:21:54.460 --> 00:21:56.839
In right it's like a gift it's like you've quit
640
00:21:56.859 --> 00:21:59.599
your job oh that's nice I mean you say a
641
00:21:59.619 --> 00:22:01.779
gift and now you can't work in the house.
642
00:22:01.779 --> 00:22:03.279
Yeah It's not a gift, is it?
643
00:22:03.299 --> 00:22:05.220
It's quite a passive-aggressive gift, isn't it?
644
00:22:05.220 --> 00:22:05.460
Exactly.
645
00:22:05.480 --> 00:22:08.630
She's put me in a kennel, Josh. She's watching me.
646
00:22:08.670 --> 00:22:09.470
Literal doghouse.
647
00:22:09.509 --> 00:22:11.769
I couldn't get any further away. I'm so far away
648
00:22:11.789 --> 00:22:13.869
from the house that the Wi-Fi cuts out.
649
00:22:14.049 --> 00:22:15.009
Oh, no.
650
00:22:15.029 --> 00:22:15.710
Oh, my.
651
00:22:16.250 --> 00:22:17.710
So I've had the internet put in. I've had it
652
00:22:17.769 --> 00:22:18.390
all insulated.
653
00:22:18.410 --> 00:22:18.670
Nice.
654
00:22:18.930 --> 00:22:21.380
And in lockdown, obviously, this is where I did most
655
00:22:21.440 --> 00:22:23.079
of the Zoom. Zoom gigs that we did.
656
00:22:23.119 --> 00:22:26.839
Yeah, of course. What are you doing heating-wise, Scott?
657
00:22:26.900 --> 00:22:27.640
I've got an oil.
658
00:22:28.200 --> 00:22:29.220
Oil heater.
659
00:22:29.619 --> 00:22:32.140
Mate, it feels apocalyptic, if I'm being honest.
660
00:22:33.589 --> 00:22:35.750
I feel like one of those people in America that,
661
00:22:35.769 --> 00:22:37.130
you know, live off roadkill and.
662
00:22:37.329 --> 00:22:39.230
Stuff like that.
663
00:22:39.250 --> 00:22:43.039
But yeah, we started doing a podcast after the lockdown...
664
00:22:42.970 --> 00:22:44.440
And then someone said to me the other day, which
665
00:22:44.500 --> 00:22:46.920
is an interesting and I've never considered, doing a podcast
666
00:22:46.940 --> 00:22:47.940
with your wife is great.
667
00:22:48.160 --> 00:22:48.599
You know what I mean?
668
00:22:48.619 --> 00:22:51.980
You get, you know, opposing views. You get the truth regularly.
669
00:22:52.500 --> 00:22:53.420
You get honesty.
670
00:22:53.700 --> 00:22:55.079
But the problem is now we're sort of in a
671
00:22:55.140 --> 00:22:56.400
contract to stay together.
672
00:22:56.700 --> 00:22:56.960
Yes.
673
00:22:57.259 --> 00:22:58.299
Oh, no, I don't know.
674
00:22:58.380 --> 00:23:00.339
I think people would listen more if you were going
675
00:23:00.359 --> 00:23:02.759
through a messy divorce and you met up every week
676
00:23:02.779 --> 00:23:03.420
to have a chat.
677
00:23:03.720 --> 00:23:04.660
Yeah, I think so.
678
00:23:04.779 --> 00:23:05.460
On Patreon.
679
00:23:05.779 --> 00:23:07.559
I wouldn't be surprised if someone does that. They do
680
00:23:07.720 --> 00:23:09.180
a fake divorce for listens.
681
00:23:09.200 --> 00:23:11.640
Yeah, do you imagine that week one who gets the
682
00:23:11.700 --> 00:23:13.569
kids little teaser trailer?
683
00:23:13.650 --> 00:23:14.250
Oh, God.
684
00:23:14.670 --> 00:23:15.690
Actually, it sounds quite bleak.
685
00:23:15.750 --> 00:23:17.390
And if it was a popular one, you know, people
686
00:23:17.410 --> 00:23:19.890
would probably go to... Can you go to divorces? Is
687
00:23:19.930 --> 00:23:21.769
that like one of the core things that you're allowed
688
00:23:21.809 --> 00:23:22.450
to go to?
689
00:23:22.509 --> 00:23:22.730
Really?
690
00:23:22.750 --> 00:23:23.910
What, sitting and watching it?
691
00:23:23.910 --> 00:23:26.690
I don't know. That can't be true, can it? That's sick, Joe.
692
00:23:26.730 --> 00:23:29.529
You sick fuck. Josh, you're just shuffling in.
693
00:23:29.769 --> 00:23:30.210
Rob.
694
00:23:30.650 --> 00:23:31.769
I'll judge you, Josh.
695
00:23:31.809 --> 00:23:33.849
And then I'd be texting you every five minutes going,
696
00:23:34.089 --> 00:23:34.589
what's happened?
697
00:23:34.690 --> 00:23:38.819
What does he want? What's she getting? How's it going?
698
00:23:39.170 --> 00:23:40.039
So, yeah, we do that.
699
00:23:40.079 --> 00:23:42.960
But we found actually, it sounds weird to say this,
700
00:23:43.079 --> 00:23:46.240
but it does give us chance to chat properly. It
701
00:23:46.279 --> 00:23:48.680
might only be like two hours a week, but the
702
00:23:48.720 --> 00:23:51.079
kids are at school and you feel like you actually...
703
00:23:51.430 --> 00:23:54.910
reconnect as a couple it's really weird it is weird
704
00:23:55.009 --> 00:23:56.529
and it's quite nice actually.
705
00:23:56.309 --> 00:23:58.289
So what about holidays when you go on holiday do
706
00:23:58.309 --> 00:24:00.809
you still do the podcast or is that a break well.
707
00:24:00.710 --> 00:24:03.130
We try and record in advance actually but we have
708
00:24:03.250 --> 00:24:03.950
it's really.
709
00:24:03.789 --> 00:24:05.410
Weird because i sort of said to jemma our our
710
00:24:05.470 --> 00:24:07.410
time together is really bizarre like the other day we
711
00:24:07.430 --> 00:24:10.210
went mattress shopping right and we'd made a point have
712
00:24:10.230 --> 00:24:13.009
you ever bought a new mattress recently um not.
713
00:24:13.009 --> 00:24:15.450
No i don't think i've ever bought a mattress.
714
00:24:15.230 --> 00:24:17.630
What are you sleeping on? Do you know what? I've
715
00:24:17.690 --> 00:24:20.230
never bought a mattress. What are you talking about? I've
716
00:24:20.259 --> 00:24:21.700
never bought a mattress. You must have.
717
00:24:21.720 --> 00:24:22.200
No, I haven't.
718
00:24:22.480 --> 00:24:23.670
Well, what are you sleeping on?
719
00:24:23.680 --> 00:24:25.900
Well, I used to be in rented accommodation.
720
00:24:25.920 --> 00:24:26.440
Right.
721
00:24:27.140 --> 00:24:27.440
Oh.
722
00:24:27.460 --> 00:24:29.359
So that would be furnished when I was in my
723
00:24:29.880 --> 00:24:33.880
20s and my late teens. And then my first house.
724
00:24:34.059 --> 00:24:36.660
Thinking about that, that is sleeping on a mattress that's
725
00:24:36.680 --> 00:24:39.569
been through numbers of people. I did it as well,
726
00:24:39.609 --> 00:24:42.869
but looking back now, I know needs must, but... I mean,
727
00:24:42.970 --> 00:24:44.609
imagine what's happening in a hotel bed.
728
00:24:44.670 --> 00:24:47.690
I'm in it every night. Oh, don't. I'm in hotels lots.
729
00:24:47.730 --> 00:24:48.490
Don't talk about that.
730
00:24:48.549 --> 00:24:50.750
Yeah, I think worse things have happened on hotel beds
731
00:24:50.789 --> 00:24:52.130
than on student mattresses.
732
00:24:52.289 --> 00:24:52.730
Maybe not.
733
00:24:52.910 --> 00:24:55.119
Could I just say the reason I've never bought a mattress?
734
00:24:55.859 --> 00:24:58.079
I don't believe Rob's ever bought a mattress either.
735
00:24:58.619 --> 00:24:59.380
Yeah, me and Lou have.
736
00:24:59.420 --> 00:25:03.700
Because the first place I bought was with Rose. And
737
00:25:03.759 --> 00:25:06.319
so Rose ordered a mattress.
738
00:25:06.359 --> 00:25:09.099
Me and Lou have been to a shop to try
739
00:25:09.160 --> 00:25:10.900
mattresses to buy one together.
740
00:25:11.240 --> 00:25:12.309
Oh, be pervs.
741
00:25:14.029 --> 00:25:16.509
Guess what's happened on those mattresses before, Rob? What I
742
00:25:16.509 --> 00:25:18.569
would say is don't get memory foam, you lose purchase.
743
00:25:19.170 --> 00:25:21.309
Well, so you've done the thing of laying.
744
00:25:21.589 --> 00:25:23.809
That's the weird thing when you see other couples laying
745
00:25:23.910 --> 00:25:27.130
with their shoes on, on beds, two in the afternoon.
746
00:25:27.299 --> 00:25:27.579
Yeah.
747
00:25:27.630 --> 00:25:29.519
Have you never done that, Josh, then? No, I haven't actually, no.
748
00:25:30.019 --> 00:25:32.180
Rose just picks it. No wonder you're not sleeping. I'm
749
00:25:32.279 --> 00:25:34.480
sleeping really well. We've got a mattress. I should say
750
00:25:34.500 --> 00:25:35.660
you should get a mattress topper.
751
00:25:35.700 --> 00:25:37.619
That is an absolute game changer. Have you got one
752
00:25:37.640 --> 00:25:37.920
of them?
753
00:25:38.240 --> 00:25:40.680
Yes, we've got one. It's good stuff. Sorry, Scott.
754
00:25:40.980 --> 00:25:43.160
We were getting bad backs, so we just thought we
755
00:25:43.200 --> 00:25:45.990
need to sort the mattress out. But yeah, it was
756
00:25:46.009 --> 00:25:47.910
that weird moment, sort of two o'clock in the afternoon.
757
00:25:47.930 --> 00:25:50.230
They say never go shopping when you're hungry. I think
758
00:25:50.269 --> 00:25:54.789
never do mattress shopping when you're tired. I was laying
759
00:25:54.829 --> 00:25:56.299
next to Gemma and we were sort of going like,
760
00:25:56.319 --> 00:25:57.259
I could go now.
761
00:25:57.759 --> 00:26:00.200
Two o'clock in the afternoon in dreams, just go.
762
00:26:00.910 --> 00:26:03.509
Yeah, I think being a parent with young kids, every
763
00:26:03.549 --> 00:26:06.309
mattress is fine. It's hard to judge it. Yeah, this
764
00:26:06.329 --> 00:26:06.750
is the thing.
765
00:26:06.769 --> 00:26:08.349
She was like, what do you think of this one?
766
00:26:08.369 --> 00:26:11.730
I was like, they're all great. We're laying down.
767
00:26:12.009 --> 00:26:15.059
We're on our own. It's all great. Can you just
768
00:26:15.079 --> 00:26:16.119
leave us?
769
00:26:16.279 --> 00:26:20.299
I just want 20 minutes in dreams on a Sunday afternoon.
770
00:26:20.579 --> 00:26:23.380
Well, I think this is one of my business plans
771
00:26:23.400 --> 00:26:25.720
that I'm never going to do is I don't want
772
00:26:25.759 --> 00:26:27.640
a hotel room, but sometimes.
773
00:26:28.079 --> 00:26:30.180
I just want a bed for an hour. You can
774
00:26:30.220 --> 00:26:31.440
find them in town.
775
00:26:31.720 --> 00:26:32.799
I'm so with you on that.
776
00:26:33.099 --> 00:26:34.960
It's when they kick you out of a hotel at
777
00:26:35.000 --> 00:26:38.240
like midday and you're just wandering like a zombie.
778
00:26:39.059 --> 00:26:40.559
I just want to lay down.
779
00:26:41.059 --> 00:26:43.220
I think that's a comedian problem.
780
00:26:43.240 --> 00:26:43.859
I don't know.
781
00:26:44.500 --> 00:26:47.480
Most other people aren't killing five hours in Norwich to
782
00:26:47.519 --> 00:26:49.240
do a gig for 20 minutes at nine o'clock.
783
00:26:49.509 --> 00:26:51.490
No, but say you're meeting your friends for dinner.
784
00:26:51.509 --> 00:26:54.430
Say you finish work at five and you meet your
785
00:26:54.470 --> 00:26:56.589
friends for dinner at seven. And you think, I might
786
00:26:56.630 --> 00:26:59.309
just go for a lie down at Josh's Mattress Emporium.
787
00:26:59.789 --> 00:27:01.529
Do you know, because what happens is you end up
788
00:27:01.569 --> 00:27:04.039
having three pints on your own. Yeah, exactly.
789
00:27:04.539 --> 00:27:06.660
Do you know once, this was a low moment, I
790
00:27:06.680 --> 00:27:09.460
was hungover and I was going to, I was going
791
00:27:09.480 --> 00:27:11.740
to a Plymouth match and I, misjudged how long it
792
00:27:11.759 --> 00:27:14.359
would take to get to Paddington, and I was brutally hungover.
793
00:27:14.380 --> 00:27:16.619
And I had an hour to kill at Paddington at
794
00:27:17.000 --> 00:27:21.130
9am on a Saturday morning. And I paid £ 5 for
795
00:27:21.150 --> 00:27:22.589
the shower so that I could just lie on the
796
00:27:22.630 --> 00:27:23.990
floor for 45 minutes. The shower?
797
00:27:24.029 --> 00:27:24.150
What?
798
00:27:26.259 --> 00:27:29.460
Bleak is that you in the fetal position you know you.
799
00:27:29.400 --> 00:27:31.839
Can pay a fiver for a shower at paddington they've
800
00:27:31.859 --> 00:27:34.440
got showers yeah you can pay a fiver and i
801
00:27:34.460 --> 00:27:36.160
was just like i could just lie on the floor
802
00:27:36.220 --> 00:27:37.430
in private.
803
00:27:36.930 --> 00:27:39.849
Here that is amazing as i can imagine you just
804
00:27:39.910 --> 00:27:42.390
curled up with a little bottle of radox you have
805
00:27:42.410 --> 00:27:43.390
to bring into.
806
00:27:43.210 --> 00:27:44.970
The illusion.
807
00:27:49.359 --> 00:27:52.259
Welcome to the podcast. Is it Sir Tom Daley? You
808
00:27:52.279 --> 00:27:55.220
must have some sort of OBE, MBE, Olympic winner.
809
00:27:55.460 --> 00:27:56.869
I'm an Obi-Wan Kenobi, mate.
810
00:27:57.470 --> 00:27:57.769
Are you?
811
00:27:57.849 --> 00:27:59.390
You're an OBE? Yeah.
812
00:27:59.549 --> 00:28:00.049
Well done.
813
00:28:00.089 --> 00:28:02.970
Well, welcome. Thank you. Sounds weird to say, to be honest.
814
00:28:03.069 --> 00:28:03.829
You'll be a.
815
00:28:03.769 --> 00:28:04.680
Sir one day, won't you?
816
00:28:04.710 --> 00:28:06.900
You'll definitely be a Sir one day, Tom. Oh, I
817
00:28:06.920 --> 00:28:07.519
don't know about that.
818
00:28:07.640 --> 00:28:07.940
Maybe.
819
00:28:08.039 --> 00:28:09.740
Maybe one day. Who did you get it off?
820
00:28:10.400 --> 00:28:12.559
I got it off of Prince Charles at the time in,
821
00:28:12.920 --> 00:28:14.500
I think it was August last year.
822
00:28:14.519 --> 00:28:16.539
We went to Windsor Castle. It was a lovely day out.
823
00:28:16.759 --> 00:28:17.319
Oh, nice.
824
00:28:17.339 --> 00:28:19.420
Yeah. And did you get a plus one, plus two?
825
00:28:19.460 --> 00:28:20.240
How many can you get in?
826
00:28:20.660 --> 00:28:23.220
Because they were still a little bit like COVID strict,
827
00:28:23.259 --> 00:28:24.640
I just had a plus one. So me and my
828
00:28:24.660 --> 00:28:27.359
husband went down and then we had a lovely lunch afterwards.
829
00:28:27.500 --> 00:28:30.000
And obviously on the high street on Windsor, they must
830
00:28:30.059 --> 00:28:31.700
have all of the people that go and get their
831
00:28:31.819 --> 00:28:34.660
awards must go in for lunch because when we got there...
832
00:28:34.740 --> 00:28:35.960
give you a glass of champagne and i was like
833
00:28:35.980 --> 00:28:39.009
how do you know it's like oh and i'm like
834
00:28:39.069 --> 00:28:41.069
all right okay but it was it was quite cool
835
00:28:41.109 --> 00:28:41.809
but yeah who.
836
00:28:41.690 --> 00:28:43.349
Got one on the day you got one because i
837
00:28:43.390 --> 00:28:45.940
imagine it's like oh my god they're getting one this
838
00:28:45.960 --> 00:28:47.500
is such an honor then you turn a corner and
839
00:28:47.519 --> 00:28:51.000
go they've got one Exactly.
840
00:28:51.019 --> 00:28:53.390
To be honest, I can't remember who else was there.
841
00:28:53.410 --> 00:28:55.470
It was such a whirlwind. I feel like Professor Chris
842
00:28:55.509 --> 00:28:56.089
Wissie was there.
843
00:28:56.130 --> 00:28:57.970
Yeah, I think I'll buy that.
844
00:28:58.089 --> 00:28:58.289
Yeah.
845
00:28:58.349 --> 00:28:59.910
So he got, did he get knighted? I think he
846
00:28:59.930 --> 00:29:01.750
must have gotten knighted. I don't know. Something like that.
847
00:29:01.769 --> 00:29:03.890
Did you, I know you have to pay for the pictures.
848
00:29:03.970 --> 00:29:05.599
Like you've just come off a roller coaster.
849
00:29:05.650 --> 00:29:06.119
Do you?
850
00:29:06.190 --> 00:29:06.779
Yeah, you do.
851
00:29:06.839 --> 00:29:08.380
Yeah, you do have to pay for the pictures and
852
00:29:08.400 --> 00:29:08.859
the video.
853
00:29:08.880 --> 00:29:11.180
Yeah. No. Yeah, they're like, you're not allowed to take
854
00:29:11.200 --> 00:29:13.339
your phone and no pictures inside because we're going to
855
00:29:13.359 --> 00:29:14.839
take them for you and charge you. Yeah.
856
00:29:15.779 --> 00:29:18.779
At graduation, how much for a video of getting your OBE? Oh,
857
00:29:18.819 --> 00:29:19.599
you don't get video.
858
00:29:19.920 --> 00:29:21.259
Oh, just photos.
859
00:29:21.660 --> 00:29:23.700
I was just lucky that they posted it on the
860
00:29:23.829 --> 00:29:25.750
Royal Family Instagram, so that's ideal.
861
00:29:25.930 --> 00:29:28.509
I can take that. That's free for me.
862
00:29:29.190 --> 00:29:31.519
How much was it? Can you remember how much school
863
00:29:31.519 --> 00:29:32.309
photos this is?
864
00:29:32.309 --> 00:29:34.670
I think it's like 250 quid. I mean, that Windsor
865
00:29:34.670 --> 00:29:35.579
Castle must.
866
00:29:35.319 --> 00:29:37.660
Be a steep upkeep, I must say, but apparently we
867
00:29:38.180 --> 00:29:39.559
have to keep chipping in.
868
00:29:40.359 --> 00:29:42.619
Wow so tom we're not just here to talk about
869
00:29:42.640 --> 00:29:45.480
your visits to the royal family also about your own
870
00:29:45.539 --> 00:29:47.460
family so what you set up at home you've got
871
00:29:47.539 --> 00:29:50.220
one son is that correct yes i do four and
872
00:29:50.240 --> 00:29:54.160
a half years so yeah at school or next year
873
00:29:54.480 --> 00:29:57.190
yeah at school so he's at school right now so
874
00:29:57.329 --> 00:29:59.349
yeah that's why there's like some kind of quiet in
875
00:29:59.369 --> 00:30:02.430
the house at least so is he enjoying school he
876
00:30:02.470 --> 00:30:04.349
loves school i think the nice thing about it is
877
00:30:04.369 --> 00:30:06.849
that he's but he can be quite shy sometimes but
878
00:30:06.890 --> 00:30:08.410
i think school has taught him to like make new
879
00:30:08.450 --> 00:30:10.450
friends and be able to help do that and also
880
00:30:10.470 --> 00:30:11.829
the independence of being able to like.
881
00:30:11.750 --> 00:30:14.390
Learn to read and write things.
882
00:30:14.069 --> 00:30:16.730
And starting to understand the way that you know each
883
00:30:16.789 --> 00:30:19.410
sign actually means something it's not just gibberish written on
884
00:30:19.450 --> 00:30:22.690
like you know symbols on a sign so yeah yeah.
885
00:30:22.750 --> 00:30:25.180
We'll take him to Wales and he starts getting double.
886
00:30:25.240 --> 00:30:27.369
I'm still struggling with that. He's like, what's going on? Yeah,
887
00:30:27.380 --> 00:30:34.440
a raft, a raft. Have you taken him to the pool?
888
00:30:34.660 --> 00:30:35.000
Oh, yeah.
889
00:30:35.059 --> 00:30:37.319
He can swim, which is nice. Because I think for me,
890
00:30:37.380 --> 00:30:39.619
it's not just about learning to swim. It's about that
891
00:30:39.700 --> 00:30:40.859
water safety.
892
00:30:40.900 --> 00:30:41.339
Yeah.
893
00:30:41.559 --> 00:30:43.339
If he ever got in trouble. That was the main
894
00:30:43.380 --> 00:30:45.380
reason why I started in the pool was because I
895
00:30:45.420 --> 00:30:47.839
lived in Plymouth, which was right by the water. So
896
00:30:47.920 --> 00:30:50.859
if I ever fell in, I could float on my
897
00:30:50.900 --> 00:30:53.250
back on the surface or do whatever I needed to do.
898
00:30:53.269 --> 00:30:55.650
And then you became the world's best at falling in.
899
00:30:55.849 --> 00:30:56.589
You're the ultimate.
900
00:30:56.630 --> 00:30:57.089
I know.
901
00:30:57.150 --> 00:30:58.930
And then the world starts to fancy falling.
902
00:30:59.069 --> 00:31:01.109
I know. Got a little bit fancier. And then, like,
903
00:31:01.130 --> 00:31:01.890
before we knew.
904
00:31:01.789 --> 00:31:02.470
It, here I am.
905
00:31:02.809 --> 00:31:04.079
Oh, but you're two Devon boys.
906
00:31:04.299 --> 00:31:04.690
Yeah.
907
00:31:04.819 --> 00:31:05.319
This is it.
908
00:31:05.619 --> 00:31:07.059
I'm from Dartmoor. You're from Plymouth.
909
00:31:07.220 --> 00:31:07.440
Yeah.
910
00:31:07.880 --> 00:31:10.640
I'd say you're the most famous person from Devon now.
911
00:31:11.230 --> 00:31:11.950
Do you think that's true?
912
00:31:12.069 --> 00:31:15.359
What about Sir Francis Drake? Oh, yeah, but we can't
913
00:31:15.380 --> 00:31:16.799
get him on the pod, so.
914
00:31:18.819 --> 00:31:21.019
Yeah, that's true. It's you or Dawn French, I think,
915
00:31:21.140 --> 00:31:22.839
the big two. Plymouth girl.
916
00:31:23.180 --> 00:31:24.940
Let's talk to you about your son. How did a
917
00:31:24.980 --> 00:31:27.109
role split with you and your husband, with your son?
918
00:31:27.180 --> 00:31:29.630
You know, it's funny, because especially when I was, like,
919
00:31:29.769 --> 00:31:32.049
travelling so much with training and diving and things like that,
920
00:31:32.130 --> 00:31:33.690
I would be away for quite a lot of time,
921
00:31:33.809 --> 00:31:36.970
so there was not necessarily the most even of balances
922
00:31:37.369 --> 00:31:39.950
in that. But when we're both home... I like to cook.
923
00:31:40.019 --> 00:31:41.500
So I've always done all of the food and all
924
00:31:41.519 --> 00:31:43.359
of that. And I'm also being an athlete. I was
925
00:31:43.400 --> 00:31:46.200
very much the one who was recording, especially in the
926
00:31:46.220 --> 00:31:48.279
first couple of weeks. You start like almost like writing
927
00:31:48.319 --> 00:31:51.819
a training program, really, of like the food, the like
928
00:31:51.859 --> 00:31:53.859
how many times he's peed, how many times he's pooed,
929
00:31:53.940 --> 00:31:55.789
all of that stuff. And it's all of the things
930
00:31:55.829 --> 00:31:57.710
I never thought I'd be writing down in a little book.
931
00:31:58.049 --> 00:32:00.930
There I was doing it anyway. So as an athlete.
932
00:32:01.390 --> 00:32:04.630
You kind of approached parenting kind of almost subconsciously like
933
00:32:04.670 --> 00:32:05.289
a training program.
934
00:32:05.309 --> 00:32:07.890
Yeah, I think it was mainly because it was like
935
00:32:08.039 --> 00:32:10.460
you read so many books and you hear about what
936
00:32:10.480 --> 00:32:12.240
you should be doing, what you shouldn't be doing, how's
937
00:32:12.279 --> 00:32:14.740
best to interact with someone. And it's just like so
938
00:32:15.000 --> 00:32:17.960
crazy chaotic all the time. I just felt like there
939
00:32:17.980 --> 00:32:20.170
was that way of being able to have some kind of,
940
00:32:20.170 --> 00:32:22.670
I guess, control because you feel so out of control
941
00:32:22.690 --> 00:32:24.690
in those first few weeks that you're like, what is
942
00:32:24.750 --> 00:32:28.069
this human being alien that you're holding? And how all
943
00:32:28.250 --> 00:32:30.650
of a sudden now I am like the prime carer.
944
00:32:30.869 --> 00:32:33.569
They are completely dependent on what I do and what
945
00:32:33.630 --> 00:32:35.789
I say and how we act with them.
946
00:32:35.910 --> 00:32:37.089
So it's, for me, it just.
947
00:32:37.509 --> 00:32:40.400
allowed me to like take some kind of stuff out
948
00:32:40.420 --> 00:32:41.779
of my head and just put it onto paper so
949
00:32:41.819 --> 00:32:43.619
I didn't have to think about it anymore. Yeah.
950
00:32:43.640 --> 00:32:44.640
So it was a bit of control.
951
00:32:44.660 --> 00:32:46.680
Like if you're logging it, you're doing something rather than
952
00:32:46.700 --> 00:32:47.980
just thinking about it and getting stressed.
953
00:32:48.000 --> 00:32:50.279
Yeah, exactly. Did you find it quite stressful then when
954
00:32:50.559 --> 00:32:51.079
he was little?
955
00:32:51.099 --> 00:32:53.460
Yeah. I mean, the biggest stress thing for me was
956
00:32:54.289 --> 00:32:56.829
sleeping at night and then looking at him and he
957
00:32:56.849 --> 00:32:58.549
was so peaceful and it looks like, oh my gosh,
958
00:32:58.609 --> 00:32:59.369
is he breathing?
959
00:32:59.630 --> 00:33:01.089
And I know every parent does that.
960
00:33:01.349 --> 00:33:01.869
Yeah.
961
00:33:02.410 --> 00:33:03.990
To the point where I was like, oh my gosh,
962
00:33:04.029 --> 00:33:05.759
he's too still. And I used to like wake him up.
963
00:33:07.380 --> 00:33:08.339
Oh, one sec.
964
00:33:08.380 --> 00:33:10.190
My daughter's calling. One sec. I'll be back in a sec.
965
00:33:10.230 --> 00:33:11.630
This is absolute classic.
966
00:33:11.690 --> 00:33:12.369
One sec.
967
00:33:12.390 --> 00:33:14.470
You carry on. You talk to me. Josh, his daughter's off.
968
00:33:14.950 --> 00:33:17.440
He is scurrying out the room. His daughter's off sick.
969
00:33:17.660 --> 00:33:19.460
But yeah, I've done that before. You wake them up
970
00:33:19.480 --> 00:33:21.460
to see if they're okay. And then they're awake all night.
971
00:33:21.500 --> 00:33:22.599
And you're like, why did I do that?
972
00:33:22.740 --> 00:33:23.920
Yeah. It is scary though.
973
00:33:24.000 --> 00:33:26.289
When you first become a parent, you don't know, like
974
00:33:26.309 --> 00:33:27.890
no matter how many books you read, no matter what
975
00:33:27.930 --> 00:33:29.829
you think, you know, about what your child is going
976
00:33:29.849 --> 00:33:32.089
to be like, you just never know what's going to
977
00:33:32.150 --> 00:33:34.009
happen and what turns going to happen next. And I
978
00:33:34.049 --> 00:33:36.829
remember so many people giving me advice on this. You
979
00:33:36.849 --> 00:33:38.329
should do this, or you should try this. And this
980
00:33:38.369 --> 00:33:39.750
is how you should do it. And I was just like,
981
00:33:40.170 --> 00:33:42.349
and when people ask me what the biggest piece of
982
00:33:42.410 --> 00:33:44.390
advice that you could give to any other parent, and
983
00:33:44.430 --> 00:33:46.680
I'm like, do not listen to any other parent's advice
984
00:33:46.960 --> 00:33:49.680
because like, they don't know the kids. So it's like,
985
00:33:49.759 --> 00:33:51.440
that's for me, one of the things that I had
986
00:33:51.480 --> 00:33:53.680
to learn and come to terms with for sure.
987
00:33:53.839 --> 00:33:55.380
Yeah it's a bit like you know what you need
988
00:33:55.400 --> 00:33:56.980
to do with kids is it's the same as going
989
00:33:57.000 --> 00:33:58.339
do you know what you need to do with people
990
00:33:58.400 --> 00:34:00.160
yeah no exactly you know what you know what you
991
00:34:00.220 --> 00:34:01.839
need to do with adults you're like well no you
992
00:34:01.880 --> 00:34:03.539
don't because you've not met that adult you don't know
993
00:34:03.559 --> 00:34:05.200
what the situation is you don't know the full.
994
00:34:05.000 --> 00:34:07.480
Story exactly everyone's different did you.
995
00:34:07.420 --> 00:34:09.619
Always want kids was that something that was always or
996
00:34:09.639 --> 00:34:12.000
you just focused on the dive in and and then
997
00:34:12.039 --> 00:34:13.719
that was something you thought about when you were getting
998
00:34:13.760 --> 00:34:15.469
nearer the end of your career.
999
00:34:15.489 --> 00:34:16.090
You're only 28.
1000
00:34:16.090 --> 00:34:17.750
I mean, you could probably still go again, couldn't you?
1001
00:34:17.769 --> 00:34:20.269
Yeah, I could go again. I am the granddad in diving,
1002
00:34:20.309 --> 00:34:21.869
to be honest. I am, like, one of the oldest.
1003
00:34:21.949 --> 00:34:24.110
I swear you started about six. Yeah, I started when
1004
00:34:24.130 --> 00:34:25.150
I was seven, so I've been doing it for a
1005
00:34:25.150 --> 00:34:27.269
very long time. But, you know, being a... Yeah, I've
1006
00:34:27.289 --> 00:34:28.289
always wanted to be a parent.
1007
00:34:28.369 --> 00:34:30.440
I remember when I was, like, 16, 17 years old,
1008
00:34:30.460 --> 00:34:32.559
when I used to go away travelling for competitions, I
1009
00:34:32.599 --> 00:34:34.000
used to see kids' clothes and be like, I'm going
1010
00:34:34.019 --> 00:34:35.179
to get that for my future kid.
1011
00:34:35.460 --> 00:34:37.420
Like, I just knew that I wanted to be a parent.
1012
00:34:37.460 --> 00:34:38.760
And then when I met Lance... Yeah.
1013
00:34:39.179 --> 00:34:42.619
in the first week that we dated... I just straight
1014
00:34:42.639 --> 00:34:43.909
up asked him, I was like, can you see yourself
1015
00:34:43.929 --> 00:34:46.250
getting married? And he was like, yes. And then I
1016
00:34:46.269 --> 00:34:48.050
was like, okay, could you ever imagine yourself having kids?
1017
00:34:48.110 --> 00:34:50.610
And he was like, yeah, sure. Like I would want kids.
1018
00:34:50.849 --> 00:34:54.550
And then we named our children in that first week. Wow.
1019
00:34:54.590 --> 00:34:56.670
So you went full Steve first date.
1020
00:34:57.010 --> 00:34:57.329
Yeah.
1021
00:34:57.369 --> 00:35:01.199
Literally we broke every single rule of dating possible. Like
1022
00:35:01.380 --> 00:35:02.539
we just went straight for it.
1023
00:35:02.699 --> 00:35:05.219
Names. And Robbie Ray is here now. So like we
1024
00:35:05.280 --> 00:35:07.030
stuck with the same name. Wow.
1025
00:35:07.050 --> 00:35:08.190
That's so good.
1026
00:35:08.510 --> 00:35:12.159
How long between then and having the kid? Five years,
1027
00:35:12.219 --> 00:35:13.920
six years. Yeah, of course.
1028
00:35:14.039 --> 00:35:16.099
It's not like you sort of like decided then, you know,
1029
00:35:16.559 --> 00:35:18.139
had a child straight away. It's like there was a
1030
00:35:18.139 --> 00:35:19.539
bit of time between it. But I do think that's
1031
00:35:19.559 --> 00:35:22.789
a good thing in like dating. just being honest and
1032
00:35:22.869 --> 00:35:24.969
totally yourself straight off the bat it does cut out
1033
00:35:24.989 --> 00:35:27.250
that six months of pretending to be someone else and
1034
00:35:27.269 --> 00:35:28.070
we've all done.
1035
00:35:27.989 --> 00:35:31.309
Exactly because it's like you know lance was like my
1036
00:35:31.369 --> 00:35:34.469
first ever long-term relationship really and like for me i
1037
00:35:34.489 --> 00:35:36.409
was like if i'm going to invest my time in
1038
00:35:36.429 --> 00:35:39.340
a relationship because you know with training i didn't really
1039
00:35:39.380 --> 00:35:41.420
have much time at all so if i was going
1040
00:35:41.440 --> 00:35:42.940
to invest in something i was like i actually want
1041
00:35:42.960 --> 00:35:45.000
to know that i'm going to get the outcome that
1042
00:35:45.019 --> 00:35:47.639
i want again it's very athlete mindset like i'd like
1043
00:35:47.679 --> 00:35:50.079
to know the plan what am i doing where am
1044
00:35:50.099 --> 00:35:52.079
i going yeah i was like writing down things like
1045
00:35:52.099 --> 00:35:53.599
you know what did he say on that day like
1046
00:35:53.619 --> 00:35:55.900
okay yeah i've got this so for me it's like
1047
00:35:56.000 --> 00:35:58.320
starting i'm learning more and more about myself as i
1048
00:35:58.340 --> 00:36:00.199
go i'm like i am actually like a really controlling
1049
00:36:00.219 --> 00:36:02.880
i like to i like to be in control.
1050
00:36:04.719 --> 00:36:06.940
I'm a real control freak, and that's the thing I
1051
00:36:07.000 --> 00:36:10.119
found most difficult, I'd say, apart from the sleep, about
1052
00:36:10.159 --> 00:36:13.360
when we first had kids, was you've just got to
1053
00:36:13.420 --> 00:36:14.510
surrender that control.
1054
00:36:14.550 --> 00:36:14.760
Yeah.
1055
00:36:15.219 --> 00:36:17.349
Have you learned to do that? Yeah, massively.
1056
00:36:17.389 --> 00:36:18.690
I think you just have to get to a point
1057
00:36:18.710 --> 00:36:22.730
where you're like, okay, whatever happens, for me, the big
1058
00:36:22.769 --> 00:36:25.840
thing was having like a... disaster of a house when
1059
00:36:25.880 --> 00:36:28.260
like they come home and it's like a tornado has
1060
00:36:28.300 --> 00:36:31.000
hit the place and you've got all of this like
1061
00:36:31.079 --> 00:36:34.539
train stuff everywhere lego everywhere everything is like all and
1062
00:36:34.639 --> 00:36:36.969
i think that was the hardest bit for me was
1063
00:36:36.989 --> 00:36:39.190
because again i like to have everything like tidy and
1064
00:36:39.230 --> 00:36:41.989
put in its place and now it's just yeah it's
1065
00:36:42.110 --> 00:36:43.710
chaos all the time and you kind of get used
1066
00:36:43.750 --> 00:36:44.869
to it and you kind of have to let go
1067
00:36:44.909 --> 00:36:47.199
of that or else you become so obsessed with it
1068
00:36:47.219 --> 00:36:49.679
and also you realize you don't have time to worry
1069
00:36:49.719 --> 00:36:51.659
about all those little things anymore you just have to
1070
00:36:51.820 --> 00:36:54.380
yeah i feel like the first six weeks in particular
1071
00:36:54.420 --> 00:36:55.820
is like survival mode.
1072
00:36:55.639 --> 00:36:59.260
Right yeah oh six weeks you're being very very kind
1073
00:36:59.389 --> 00:37:02.449
i'd say the first six months was survival mode for me.
1074
00:37:02.230 --> 00:37:04.710
True i still feel like i'm in survival mode sometimes
1075
00:37:04.730 --> 00:37:05.329
to be honest.
1076
00:37:05.469 --> 00:37:08.469
And was it surrogacy you and lance did yes yes
1077
00:37:08.789 --> 00:37:11.329
and then and uh excuse my novelty but so did
1078
00:37:11.349 --> 00:37:14.280
you get robbie ray like immediately sort of you're there
1079
00:37:14.300 --> 00:37:15.940
for the birth and stuff like that is that is
1080
00:37:15.960 --> 00:37:17.579
that how it is Yeah, exactly.
1081
00:37:17.619 --> 00:37:18.679
We're there from the birth.
1082
00:37:18.699 --> 00:37:21.239
And there's lots of different ways with surrogacy, how it
1083
00:37:21.280 --> 00:37:23.760
works in terms of the UK versus the US and
1084
00:37:23.800 --> 00:37:25.630
what laws are there are around.
1085
00:37:25.329 --> 00:37:26.789
It and all that kind of stuff. But yeah, we
1086
00:37:26.809 --> 00:37:29.369
were there. We were present for birth. And I had
1087
00:37:29.730 --> 00:37:31.130
first skin to skin contact.
1088
00:37:31.190 --> 00:37:35.980
Which was absolutely incredible, you know, because we would obviously
1089
00:37:36.000 --> 00:37:37.739
always going to need help to have a kid because
1090
00:37:38.079 --> 00:37:40.039
You know, for two gay men, I mean, no matter
1091
00:37:40.079 --> 00:37:43.539
how hard we try, and it's not quite as easy
1092
00:37:43.599 --> 00:37:45.719
as a bottle of wine and a good time.
1093
00:37:45.800 --> 00:37:47.500
It takes a lot of thought.
1094
00:37:48.960 --> 00:37:52.420
But I do think that is the most magical experience
1095
00:37:52.500 --> 00:37:55.679
because our surrogate who, you know, she's asked us not
1096
00:37:55.719 --> 00:37:57.710
to name her for lots of reasons.
1097
00:37:57.730 --> 00:37:58.289
Of course.
1098
00:37:58.710 --> 00:38:01.150
But she is the most special human being on the planet.
1099
00:38:01.289 --> 00:38:04.789
And she has... made our dream of having a family
1100
00:38:04.849 --> 00:38:06.929
come true and it really takes a special kind of
1101
00:38:06.969 --> 00:38:09.849
human being to be so selfless to do that and
1102
00:38:09.869 --> 00:38:12.030
you know she's now like a friend for.
1103
00:38:11.949 --> 00:38:14.070
Life i mean we speak all the time.
1104
00:38:13.730 --> 00:38:17.269
Uh robbie calls her her tummy buddy so they're tummy
1105
00:38:17.289 --> 00:38:20.349
buddies and it's like it's really sweet and like he
1106
00:38:20.389 --> 00:38:24.010
also speaks with her kids as well yeah it is
1107
00:38:24.130 --> 00:38:25.469
a very magical thing.
1108
00:38:25.289 --> 00:38:27.800
This the whole journey is very special Yeah.
1109
00:38:27.840 --> 00:38:30.969
And how much are you in contact during the pregnancy
1110
00:38:31.110 --> 00:38:31.469
and stuff?
1111
00:38:31.489 --> 00:38:32.130
The whole time.
1112
00:38:32.150 --> 00:38:35.230
I mean, we text all the time and especially like,
1113
00:38:35.269 --> 00:38:38.670
you know, every day we will also come to the appointments. And,
1114
00:38:39.090 --> 00:38:40.989
you know, if we couldn't be there in person because
1115
00:38:41.329 --> 00:38:44.670
she lives in America, we would dial in on Zoom
1116
00:38:44.840 --> 00:38:47.800
or on FaceTime or whatever. And so we were in
1117
00:38:47.840 --> 00:38:50.219
constant communication the whole time and we used to send
1118
00:38:50.260 --> 00:38:53.659
little voice notes constantly. And she had these like earbuds
1119
00:38:53.699 --> 00:38:56.260
that she could put on her tummy so that the
1120
00:38:56.369 --> 00:38:59.630
baby could in theory hear food like stuff, which was
1121
00:38:59.809 --> 00:39:00.449
really sweet.
1122
00:39:00.510 --> 00:39:01.309
Oh, it's amazing.
1123
00:39:01.710 --> 00:39:03.780
And so did you have to do the first few
1124
00:39:03.820 --> 00:39:05.900
weeks in a hotel in America or.
1125
00:39:06.300 --> 00:39:09.980
So we have a place in America because Lance, my husband,
1126
00:39:10.019 --> 00:39:12.639
is American and the laws are much safer for surrogate
1127
00:39:12.820 --> 00:39:14.300
and for us in the US.
1128
00:39:14.380 --> 00:39:16.469
Yeah, it's a bit slow, the UK, with that kind
1129
00:39:16.510 --> 00:39:19.170
of legislation, isn't it? It's a bit more tricky. Yeah,
1130
00:39:19.190 --> 00:39:20.510
it's slightly trickier to do here.
1131
00:39:20.909 --> 00:39:23.989
Everybody knows exactly where they stand, which is important to
1132
00:39:24.030 --> 00:39:27.389
have that clarity. And, the surrogate is always in control
1133
00:39:27.719 --> 00:39:31.219
of everything, which is very important. And it's also one
1134
00:39:31.239 --> 00:39:34.039
of those things that you realize the importance of having
1135
00:39:34.099 --> 00:39:36.429
everything out on the table and being able to I.
1136
00:39:36.389 --> 00:39:38.030
Have those open conversations.
1137
00:39:38.110 --> 00:39:40.780
And, you know, in the US as well, in California,
1138
00:39:41.079 --> 00:39:43.599
it's again, the UK laws is that the surrogate can
1139
00:39:43.719 --> 00:39:46.199
use her eggs as well. Whereas in the US, in
1140
00:39:46.239 --> 00:39:48.940
California anyway, you have to use an egg donor.
1141
00:39:49.099 --> 00:39:54.179
So it's not the surrogate's egg. So it's a very complicated, obviously, thing.
1142
00:39:54.440 --> 00:39:54.820
Yeah.
1143
00:39:55.260 --> 00:39:57.199
One of my best friends, his husband's Brazilian, and they
1144
00:39:57.219 --> 00:39:59.090
were looking into surrogacy, and they were chatting about it,
1145
00:39:59.090 --> 00:40:01.550
and it can be quite costly. You know, there's millions
1146
00:40:01.570 --> 00:40:04.070
of different ways to do things. And they say, obviously,
1147
00:40:04.090 --> 00:40:06.289
you get the egg donor, and then you can either
1148
00:40:06.849 --> 00:40:09.409
choose one of the parents to use the sperm, or
1149
00:40:09.449 --> 00:40:11.480
you can just sort of put it in and you
1150
00:40:11.500 --> 00:40:13.079
don't know, and it's sort of a bit of a lottery.
1151
00:40:13.119 --> 00:40:16.719
But my mate's basically Irish, the most pale skin with
1152
00:40:16.739 --> 00:40:20.300
dark hair, and then his very much darker Brazilian husband.
1153
00:40:20.659 --> 00:40:22.340
I was like, it wouldn't be a surprise. It'd be
1154
00:40:22.380 --> 00:40:22.820
a bit obvious.
1155
00:40:22.840 --> 00:40:23.619
Yeah, exactly.
1156
00:40:23.639 --> 00:40:31.530
LAUGHTER Welcome to the podcast, Dame Jessica Ennis-Hill.
1157
00:40:31.829 --> 00:40:34.710
We're very excited to have you. Dame Jess, can I
1158
00:40:34.710 --> 00:40:35.349
call you Dame Jess?
1159
00:40:35.789 --> 00:40:37.210
You can call me Dame Jess, yeah, I like it.
1160
00:40:37.210 --> 00:40:40.349
Dame Jess, our first Dame. I've never seen Rob so
1161
00:40:40.389 --> 00:40:42.710
nervous to talk to someone. Well, I'm talking to a
1162
00:40:42.769 --> 00:40:48.340
member of the British Empire. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
1163
00:40:48.400 --> 00:40:49.599
Slash royal family, you know.
1164
00:40:49.619 --> 00:40:50.960
Royal family, the royal family.
1165
00:40:51.960 --> 00:40:55.119
So we're also very excited because you are a listener
1166
00:40:55.139 --> 00:40:57.380
of the podcast as well. which always makes it more
1167
00:40:57.420 --> 00:40:59.619
fun because you understand that.
1168
00:40:59.639 --> 00:41:00.280
How bad it is.
1169
00:41:00.539 --> 00:41:01.139
Yeah.
1170
00:41:01.300 --> 00:41:02.579
I understand the dynamics.
1171
00:41:03.099 --> 00:41:07.300
So Jess, how many kids have you got and how
1172
00:41:07.360 --> 00:41:07.920
old are they?
1173
00:41:08.440 --> 00:41:12.159
So I've got two kids. One has just turned six.
1174
00:41:12.300 --> 00:41:15.130
So that's my daughter Liv. And then my son Reggie
1175
00:41:15.190 --> 00:41:18.190
was nine in the summer. So yeah, kind of big
1176
00:41:18.210 --> 00:41:21.150
kids now, actually. I still think they're like little You know,
1177
00:41:21.190 --> 00:41:23.469
like little dinky things, but they've changed so much.
1178
00:41:23.530 --> 00:41:25.570
I know yours is similar age, Rob, but.
1179
00:41:25.869 --> 00:41:26.130
Yeah.
1180
00:41:26.150 --> 00:41:27.699
Yeah, when they get to that age, they just, I
1181
00:41:27.719 --> 00:41:29.360
don't know, they mature so much.
1182
00:41:29.460 --> 00:41:31.000
They get very independent, don't they?
1183
00:41:31.280 --> 00:41:31.840
Yeah.
1184
00:41:32.139 --> 00:41:34.619
I can't believe your son's nine. I know that sounds weird,
1185
00:41:34.840 --> 00:41:37.460
but I can't believe your son's nine, because obviously, because
1186
00:41:37.480 --> 00:41:40.889
you had your son during your career. Yeah. I can
1187
00:41:40.949 --> 00:41:43.630
vividly remember you having a child. Well, not vividly remember.
1188
00:41:43.429 --> 00:41:44.829
You having a child. That's the way it was.
1189
00:41:44.849 --> 00:41:45.349
Josh, you freak.
1190
00:41:45.369 --> 00:41:50.710
LAUGHTER a little bit worrying yeah no and it doesn't
1191
00:41:50.789 --> 00:41:54.489
feel like that long ago but obviously um nine.
1192
00:41:54.750 --> 00:41:58.570
Yeah I know I had him I obviously had him
1193
00:41:58.730 --> 00:42:00.449
in 2014 but yeah I had him and then I
1194
00:42:00.469 --> 00:42:03.190
came back to my career and yeah it seems like
1195
00:42:03.230 --> 00:42:05.860
five minutes ago but actually it's yeah a very long
1196
00:42:05.889 --> 00:42:06.489
time ago.
1197
00:42:06.340 --> 00:42:08.639
Now we did want to talk about that what was
1198
00:42:08.659 --> 00:42:12.320
that like resuming being an athlete after you'd had a
1199
00:42:12.360 --> 00:42:13.219
child Do.
1200
00:42:13.199 --> 00:42:15.320
You know, I was just so naive.
1201
00:42:15.420 --> 00:42:18.400
Like you have no idea what it's like to become
1202
00:42:18.440 --> 00:42:21.800
a parent. And although I was like so excited, you know,
1203
00:42:21.820 --> 00:42:25.059
you're kind of like all the unknowns and you think
1204
00:42:25.079 --> 00:42:26.820
that you have this like plan in your head of
1205
00:42:26.900 --> 00:42:28.960
how it's all going to like work out. And I
1206
00:42:29.000 --> 00:42:31.780
think being an athlete as well, you're so structured in
1207
00:42:31.800 --> 00:42:35.179
what you do and everything's organized, everything's planned.
1208
00:42:35.199 --> 00:42:36.219
You've got deadlines.
1209
00:42:36.280 --> 00:42:39.019
Like it's so structured that I almost thought that when
1210
00:42:39.050 --> 00:42:41.510
I had my son and He was just going to
1211
00:42:41.530 --> 00:42:43.730
like slot into that like routine.
1212
00:42:43.849 --> 00:42:47.389
And I thought like, you're a bit of a control freak.
1213
00:42:47.510 --> 00:42:49.769
Like you just, you just think that everything is going
1214
00:42:49.789 --> 00:42:53.449
to be similar, but actually it was just, it was
1215
00:42:53.769 --> 00:42:56.769
the biggest shock, you know, becoming a parent for the
1216
00:42:56.789 --> 00:43:00.570
first time, but also then trying to get back into training,
1217
00:43:00.750 --> 00:43:04.090
trying to get back into competition, trying to get everyone
1218
00:43:04.130 --> 00:43:05.909
around me to buy into the idea that I was
1219
00:43:05.969 --> 00:43:07.329
actually going to come back.
1220
00:43:07.389 --> 00:43:08.349
Like I was still going to.
1221
00:43:08.389 --> 00:43:09.269
Did people not believe you?
1222
00:43:09.889 --> 00:43:12.929
Yeah, I think quite a lot of people doubted what
1223
00:43:12.949 --> 00:43:15.320
I was trying to do. And definitely people like within
1224
00:43:15.679 --> 00:43:17.840
my like team as well. They were like, you know,
1225
00:43:17.880 --> 00:43:20.090
you sure you want to come back? You know, things
1226
00:43:20.130 --> 00:43:22.650
are going to change quite a bit. And I was like, Yeah,
1227
00:43:22.670 --> 00:43:24.409
they're going to change, but I'm going to come back.
1228
00:43:24.469 --> 00:43:24.849
It's fine.
1229
00:43:24.889 --> 00:43:27.130
I'll take a few months off and then I'll just
1230
00:43:27.170 --> 00:43:27.889
get back to normal.
1231
00:43:27.909 --> 00:43:29.550
So when did you have your... Was it 2014?
1232
00:43:29.530 --> 00:43:29.809
When in 2014?
1233
00:43:29.800 --> 00:43:31.139
So I had him July 2014. Right. So you weren't...
1234
00:43:31.159 --> 00:43:32.559
So in 2012, you'd won the gold medal at London. Yeah.
1235
00:43:32.619 --> 00:43:34.800
So then were you trying for the baby.
1236
00:43:45.090 --> 00:43:47.710
In between the middle of the Olympics then? Or was
1237
00:43:47.769 --> 00:43:50.449
it just a happy accident? Or was it a bit
1238
00:43:50.489 --> 00:43:50.949
more relaxed?
1239
00:43:50.969 --> 00:43:53.019
Or were you trying to slip it in, almost scheduling
1240
00:43:53.059 --> 00:43:53.739
the pregnancy?
1241
00:43:53.760 --> 00:43:57.420
Yeah, so it wasn't really like a scheduled and planned
1242
00:43:57.460 --> 00:44:00.469
per se. It was a little bit of a surprise
1243
00:44:00.550 --> 00:44:02.090
planned shot, if you like.
1244
00:44:02.469 --> 00:44:05.590
Yeah, very small on the plan.
1245
00:44:05.869 --> 00:44:08.719
Because a lot of athletes do, they plan it in and,
1246
00:44:08.789 --> 00:44:10.230
you know, in the right time so that they can
1247
00:44:10.250 --> 00:44:12.429
come back for the Olympics and stuff. But it wasn't
1248
00:44:12.469 --> 00:44:15.309
necessarily like that for us. And I remember like going
1249
00:44:15.389 --> 00:44:18.449
to my coach, like obviously finding out I was pregnant,
1250
00:44:18.469 --> 00:44:19.530
obviously really happy.
1251
00:44:19.550 --> 00:44:20.340
We both were.
1252
00:44:20.400 --> 00:44:22.739
And then I had to go and tell like my team.
1253
00:44:23.250 --> 00:44:27.079
And I was so nervous to tell my coach that...
1254
00:44:27.059 --> 00:44:29.300
Because he'd had all this planned. He was like, right,
1255
00:44:29.320 --> 00:44:31.659
you're going to do the Commonwealth Games in 2014 and
1256
00:44:31.699 --> 00:44:33.719
then Worlds, Olympics.
1257
00:44:33.760 --> 00:44:34.619
He had this planned.
1258
00:44:34.659 --> 00:44:37.320
And they're planning their schedules around it as well because
1259
00:44:37.389 --> 00:44:39.010
it's sort of a long-term thing, yeah.
1260
00:44:39.429 --> 00:44:41.090
Yeah, their whole life is.
1261
00:44:41.130 --> 00:44:43.349
When you support an athlete, their whole life is around
1262
00:44:43.869 --> 00:44:47.489
you performing. And then I remember going to his house
1263
00:44:47.699 --> 00:44:51.579
and just being like... Okay, so I've got something to
1264
00:44:51.639 --> 00:44:51.980
tell you.
1265
00:44:52.000 --> 00:44:53.719
I was so nervous.
1266
00:44:53.739 --> 00:44:54.590
Oh, God.
1267
00:44:55.070 --> 00:44:59.630
Sit down. I was like, well, so I'm pregnant. And
1268
00:44:59.690 --> 00:45:02.849
he was just so shocked. Like, he didn't know what
1269
00:45:02.869 --> 00:45:05.349
to say. He just kind of sat there. And then
1270
00:45:05.389 --> 00:45:07.750
he got his laptop out and he started looking at dates.
1271
00:45:08.269 --> 00:45:14.480
He didn't even say congratulations. He was just in such
1272
00:45:14.519 --> 00:45:15.199
a fluster.
1273
00:45:15.260 --> 00:45:16.199
Like what dates?
1274
00:45:16.500 --> 00:45:17.960
When's he going to be born? When's she going to
1275
00:45:18.000 --> 00:45:20.559
be born? You know, like what's going to happen? And
1276
00:45:20.579 --> 00:45:23.300
I was just sat there like, okay, congratulations.
1277
00:45:23.340 --> 00:45:24.920
You know, anything.
1278
00:45:24.320 --> 00:45:26.090
Like that would be nice.
1279
00:45:26.409 --> 00:45:28.269
But yeah, it was, it was a big, it was
1280
00:45:28.289 --> 00:45:30.590
a big shock to the whole team, but obviously a
1281
00:45:30.630 --> 00:45:31.150
great shock.
1282
00:45:31.670 --> 00:45:35.210
How many months after did you do your first training session?
1283
00:45:35.670 --> 00:45:38.210
So I kind of like went back into training gradually.
1284
00:45:38.349 --> 00:45:40.789
So I went on the bike for a bit, you know,
1285
00:45:40.829 --> 00:45:42.730
I kind of got a setup in my garage where
1286
00:45:42.750 --> 00:45:45.329
I could do like some exercises and stuff. So I
1287
00:45:45.349 --> 00:45:46.530
wasn't like traveling to.
1288
00:45:46.389 --> 00:45:48.170
And from the track all the time.
1289
00:45:48.190 --> 00:45:52.170
And then I didn't really start, I'd say probably like
1290
00:45:53.170 --> 00:45:55.329
eight to 10 weeks after I had him, I started
1291
00:45:55.369 --> 00:45:59.130
doing you know gentle exercise but I didn't start like
1292
00:45:59.170 --> 00:46:02.130
hurdling or high jumping again at that stage or anything
1293
00:46:02.170 --> 00:46:05.030
like that um but yeah it was very much like
1294
00:46:05.070 --> 00:46:09.690
a gradual build-up like back into yeah into training.
1295
00:46:09.389 --> 00:46:11.360
And did you find your body had changed you know
1296
00:46:11.460 --> 00:46:13.820
after because I find women after they have children their
1297
00:46:13.840 --> 00:46:15.760
body does sort of change shape and the hormones are
1298
00:46:15.780 --> 00:46:18.000
different and things like that did because as an athlete
1299
00:46:18.059 --> 00:46:20.239
everything's so fine-tuned down to what you're eating and how
1300
00:46:20.280 --> 00:46:22.360
your body reacts and Did you find that there were
1301
00:46:22.400 --> 00:46:24.340
certain things that you couldn't do as well or you
1302
00:46:24.360 --> 00:46:26.210
could even do better after or anything?
1303
00:46:26.510 --> 00:46:27.429
Did you notice that?
1304
00:46:27.449 --> 00:46:29.610
Or was it pretty much once you'd got over the
1305
00:46:29.630 --> 00:46:32.210
initial impact of the birth, it was the same or
1306
00:46:32.230 --> 00:46:33.460
was it different at all?
1307
00:46:33.710 --> 00:46:35.130
No, no, completely different.
1308
00:46:35.150 --> 00:46:35.750
Really?
1309
00:46:36.090 --> 00:46:37.599
Yeah, completely different.
1310
00:46:37.840 --> 00:46:38.159
I am.
1311
00:46:38.800 --> 00:46:41.480
you know everyone that has a baby a few months
1312
00:46:41.559 --> 00:46:44.260
after you like look down you're like oh like why
1313
00:46:44.440 --> 00:46:46.039
do I not look the way I used to look
1314
00:46:46.079 --> 00:46:49.300
and obviously I had like I was totally ripped like
1315
00:46:49.320 --> 00:46:52.219
I had a massive six pack I don't mean to
1316
00:46:52.260 --> 00:46:54.519
brag but I had a six pack and you know
1317
00:46:54.599 --> 00:46:57.820
really kind of strong and then obviously your body changes
1318
00:46:57.860 --> 00:47:00.860
so much and it's it's amazing how much your body
1319
00:47:01.380 --> 00:47:04.460
like just transforms and you know you can carry your
1320
00:47:04.480 --> 00:47:07.989
baby and it changes in an incredible way but Yeah,
1321
00:47:08.030 --> 00:47:11.809
when I got back to training, I was definitely not
1322
00:47:11.849 --> 00:47:14.230
the athlete that I was before. My body had changed.
1323
00:47:14.289 --> 00:47:19.300
Like mentally, I changed massively. Like your priorities all change,
1324
00:47:19.440 --> 00:47:19.800
you know.
1325
00:47:19.820 --> 00:47:22.940
Did it feel like it mattered less in a way?
1326
00:47:23.559 --> 00:47:27.300
Yeah, I think you just have like a greater perspective.
1327
00:47:27.320 --> 00:47:31.250
So I felt like whereas before I'd had Reggie, everything
1328
00:47:31.289 --> 00:47:33.639
was like very much different. It's about me. It's about
1329
00:47:33.679 --> 00:47:36.800
how I train. It's about how I can be the best.
1330
00:47:37.019 --> 00:47:39.559
And then once you have your baby, it's like, well, actually,
1331
00:47:39.599 --> 00:47:42.719
none of that really matters that much. And it's how
1332
00:47:42.760 --> 00:47:45.659
do I be the best mom? And, you know, how
1333
00:47:45.699 --> 00:47:47.840
can I do all those things really well? And it's
1334
00:47:47.900 --> 00:47:51.769
about your child, isn't it? So you change like completely.
1335
00:47:51.789 --> 00:47:55.590
And I think that transition from athlete to mother is huge.
1336
00:47:56.719 --> 00:47:59.079
Yeah, because it's not even just like the time where like,
1337
00:47:59.159 --> 00:48:02.420
you know, obviously your partner can have the baby and
1338
00:48:02.440 --> 00:48:04.480
look after the baby. And even if you did less
1339
00:48:04.519 --> 00:48:06.360
of it, your partner did more of it. There is
1340
00:48:06.400 --> 00:48:09.619
a direct impact on the body as such, you know.
1341
00:48:11.199 --> 00:48:13.980
Was you slower in your running and stuff like that,
1342
00:48:14.099 --> 00:48:16.599
even when you was back to full fitness? Or was
1343
00:48:16.619 --> 00:48:18.739
there anything in particular that you noticed that you couldn't
1344
00:48:18.760 --> 00:48:21.070
do as well? Or was it just in general with
1345
00:48:21.199 --> 00:48:21.969
your motivation?
1346
00:48:22.650 --> 00:48:25.570
No, I felt that obviously because it was after the Olympics,
1347
00:48:25.590 --> 00:48:28.199
so I'd had like this huge high, like the pinnacle
1348
00:48:28.219 --> 00:48:28.800
of my career.
1349
00:48:28.840 --> 00:48:30.699
Like winning a home Olympics.
1350
00:48:30.800 --> 00:48:33.280
And, you know, once I went back into training after that,
1351
00:48:33.300 --> 00:48:35.559
I was like, like, what am I training for?
1352
00:48:35.579 --> 00:48:36.480
Like, this is hard.
1353
00:48:36.980 --> 00:48:37.460
And then I.
1354
00:48:39.170 --> 00:48:43.469
Had my son. I've already gotten it all.
1355
00:48:44.050 --> 00:48:46.010
Winning in Rio, how much does that matter?
1356
00:48:46.250 --> 00:48:48.250
Once you've won in London, that's the one.
1357
00:48:48.329 --> 00:48:49.659
It doesn't matter.
1358
00:48:50.800 --> 00:48:53.480
I've got my gold mailbox now.
1359
00:48:53.559 --> 00:48:54.380
That's the main thing.
1360
00:48:54.619 --> 00:48:55.639
Exactly, exactly.
1361
00:48:55.679 --> 00:48:59.159
But after having Reggie, like, it gave me, like, a
1362
00:48:59.219 --> 00:49:03.429
new sense of motivation. But, yeah, my body had changed
1363
00:49:03.469 --> 00:49:06.570
so much. Like, I couldn't run as fast as I
1364
00:49:06.690 --> 00:49:09.610
used to. Like, I was in training, I'd be at the, like,
1365
00:49:09.829 --> 00:49:13.429
front of the pack, you know, beating my training buddies.
1366
00:49:13.530 --> 00:49:16.489
And just, like, I always had this, like, next gear
1367
00:49:16.510 --> 00:49:18.650
that I could go to. I was really confident in that.
1368
00:49:18.949 --> 00:49:21.429
Whereas after I'd had it, I was like oh man
1369
00:49:21.469 --> 00:49:23.550
like I can't even get to the top of the
1370
00:49:23.610 --> 00:49:26.909
hills and hill runs and yeah I was just really
1371
00:49:27.380 --> 00:49:31.159
really struggling and that's like quite a mental like impact
1372
00:49:31.239 --> 00:49:33.239
as well when you're at the back of the group
1373
00:49:33.320 --> 00:49:36.559
in training but you're Olympic champion and.
1374
00:49:36.500 --> 00:49:39.219
Everyone's expecting you to beat them like it's.
1375
00:49:40.170 --> 00:49:43.610
It's tough like it's mentally really really challenging and.
1376
00:49:43.570 --> 00:49:46.389
You're doing that along with all the stuff that you
1377
00:49:46.409 --> 00:49:49.050
do when you've got a new kid as well so
1378
00:49:49.070 --> 00:49:52.780
your sleepless nights and was he a good sleeper do.
1379
00:49:52.760 --> 00:49:55.599
You know what looking back he i'd say he was
1380
00:49:55.659 --> 00:49:59.599
like a typical like average baby's like sleeping wise like
1381
00:49:59.619 --> 00:50:01.880
he slept he was like up a lot at the
1382
00:50:01.920 --> 00:50:04.199
beginning i was like feeding through the night and stuff
1383
00:50:04.280 --> 00:50:06.440
but he then got into a bit of a rhythm
1384
00:50:06.460 --> 00:50:09.400
where he'd sleep for like four hours and that's like
1385
00:50:10.159 --> 00:50:12.519
dream isn't it you know to have like four or five.
1386
00:50:12.320 --> 00:50:14.860
Hours four hours sleep like.
1387
00:50:14.780 --> 00:50:16.900
That is an absolute you're winning that.
1388
00:50:16.960 --> 00:50:20.789
My sister-in-law's got a newborn and uh i overheard uh
1389
00:50:20.969 --> 00:50:22.369
lou chatting to her mom about it and going.
1390
00:50:22.250 --> 00:50:24.389
Yeah well last night she got two hours in a
1391
00:50:24.429 --> 00:50:28.190
row and i'm like oh brilliant greatness and i was
1392
00:50:29.219 --> 00:50:32.579
like that's been celebrated.
1393
00:50:32.340 --> 00:50:34.960
I cannot even i don't know how you do it
1394
00:50:35.000 --> 00:50:37.300
like i can't take myself back to those days like
1395
00:50:37.699 --> 00:50:39.840
you know, been up all through the night and then
1396
00:50:40.380 --> 00:50:42.500
I'd have to get up and train in the morning
1397
00:50:42.539 --> 00:50:44.840
and then you're back at lunch. And like, it was
1398
00:50:44.929 --> 00:50:48.019
just crazy, but. I don't know, you just do it,
1399
00:50:48.070 --> 00:50:49.570
don't you? When you're in the thick of it.
1400
00:50:49.650 --> 00:50:51.849
I suppose as well, you would have been at like
1401
00:50:52.289 --> 00:50:54.670
the most, you know, you were the poster girl really
1402
00:50:54.710 --> 00:50:57.550
of the Olympics and you was on all the advertising
1403
00:50:57.570 --> 00:50:59.559
and all your stuff with Adidas as well. So not
1404
00:50:59.619 --> 00:51:01.880
only have you won the gold, you're in your sort
1405
00:51:01.900 --> 00:51:05.159
of like opportunities are flying at you, whether it's brands
1406
00:51:05.239 --> 00:51:06.639
and stuff like that. And then you're at sort of
1407
00:51:06.679 --> 00:51:08.719
home with the baby and then trying to juggle training
1408
00:51:08.760 --> 00:51:10.719
and you're sort of, it must be quite frustrating because
1409
00:51:10.739 --> 00:51:12.900
you want to make the most of those opportunities. Did
1410
00:51:12.920 --> 00:51:15.019
you find it quite conflicting?
1411
00:51:15.360 --> 00:51:18.360
I found it challenging because it's still like for athletes,
1412
00:51:18.400 --> 00:51:20.760
like female athletes, it's still like a massive grey area,
1413
00:51:20.800 --> 00:51:24.170
like having kids in your career and stepping away for
1414
00:51:24.190 --> 00:51:28.090
a bit and then coming back. Like with sponsors and everything,
1415
00:51:28.190 --> 00:51:31.489
it's still very, there's not like a maternity package.
1416
00:51:31.550 --> 00:51:32.269
It's not like.
1417
00:51:32.110 --> 00:51:33.090
There's a standard way.
1418
00:51:33.110 --> 00:51:33.409
Yeah, of course.
1419
00:51:35.719 --> 00:51:38.579
So if you're not there performing, then you're not, you know, your,
1420
00:51:38.659 --> 00:51:42.340
your deals stop. And it's really dependent on, on who,
1421
00:51:42.719 --> 00:51:44.880
like what companies you work with. And I was super fortunate,
1422
00:51:44.920 --> 00:51:47.989
like obviously working with Adidas for years, they were fantastic.
1423
00:51:48.010 --> 00:51:50.530
You know, they just freeze my contract and then, you know,
1424
00:51:50.570 --> 00:51:53.050
just carry on, pick up where you left off essentially.
1425
00:51:53.929 --> 00:51:56.469
Whereas for a lot of athletes, you know, you step
1426
00:51:56.510 --> 00:52:00.039
off the track for a period of time, like a season.
1427
00:51:59.579 --> 00:52:02.219
And, And, you know, you lose a lot of money
1428
00:52:02.260 --> 00:52:03.599
and a lot of, yeah, a.
1429
00:52:03.639 --> 00:52:04.179
Lot of deals.
1430
00:52:04.199 --> 00:52:05.809
But that happened with an injury as well.
1431
00:52:06.820 --> 00:52:09.579
Yeah, so being injured, yeah, there's, like, you have, like,
1432
00:52:09.619 --> 00:52:10.920
a bonus reduction and.
1433
00:52:10.980 --> 00:52:13.119
Obviously you're not competing, so you're not priced money.
1434
00:52:13.280 --> 00:52:14.449
Oh, my God.
1435
00:52:14.469 --> 00:52:18.219
And it's so unfair just, like, genetically where, like, men
1436
00:52:18.610 --> 00:52:21.250
won't have that. Like, they can have a family and
1437
00:52:21.269 --> 00:52:23.789
their body won't be impacted at all. But it's almost
1438
00:52:23.829 --> 00:52:26.730
like coming back from serious injuries and going through labour
1439
00:52:26.769 --> 00:52:29.449
and being pregnant and giving birth.
1440
00:52:29.530 --> 00:52:32.010
It's mad having that in the middle of your career.
1441
00:52:32.030 --> 00:52:32.289
Yeah.
1442
00:52:32.489 --> 00:52:34.190
Yeah, and it's the whole, like, how do you go
1443
00:52:34.230 --> 00:52:37.309
through your pregnancy and then, like, say, how was your birth? Like,
1444
00:52:37.349 --> 00:52:39.230
you know, you have no idea how that's going to
1445
00:52:39.289 --> 00:52:42.050
pan out. And then it's like, how do you recover
1446
00:52:42.070 --> 00:52:44.590
from that? How do you get back? And, yeah, I mean,
1447
00:52:44.610 --> 00:52:48.070
there's so many challenges. But equally, like, in the same way,
1448
00:52:48.369 --> 00:52:51.849
it's probably one of my, like, proudest achievements ever, you know,
1449
00:52:51.869 --> 00:52:54.590
being able to have them and come back and then
1450
00:52:55.110 --> 00:52:57.909
win a world championships and then win a silver medal
1451
00:52:57.969 --> 00:53:00.639
at the Olympics again was pretty special.
1452
00:53:00.659 --> 00:53:00.860
Yeah.
1453
00:53:01.000 --> 00:53:03.659
Can I ask a sensitive question here, Jess? Do you
1454
00:53:03.699 --> 00:53:05.949
think if you'd had your child three years later, you
1455
00:53:05.969 --> 00:53:09.869
would have got gold in Brazil? Do you know what?
1456
00:53:09.889 --> 00:53:13.670
Does that ever cross your mind, Jess, when you're wiping
1457
00:53:13.690 --> 00:53:14.210
his bum?
1458
00:53:15.510 --> 00:53:17.719
It's a very good question. And do you know what?
1459
00:53:17.739 --> 00:53:18.679
In all honesty. Yeah.
1460
00:53:19.800 --> 00:53:22.980
At that stage, I wouldn't have done it any other way.
1461
00:53:23.260 --> 00:53:24.639
I had the best.
1462
00:53:24.480 --> 00:53:25.019
Of both worlds.
1463
00:53:25.039 --> 00:53:26.119
Did he come to Brazil?
1464
00:53:26.500 --> 00:53:27.260
So he came.
1465
00:53:27.579 --> 00:53:29.960
So the whole team, the GB team, goes out and
1466
00:53:30.000 --> 00:53:33.320
does a training camp before the Olympics. And I opted
1467
00:53:33.429 --> 00:53:36.010
to go and do a training camp just with my
1468
00:53:36.090 --> 00:53:39.269
small team in Barcelona. And my husband came out and
1469
00:53:39.309 --> 00:53:42.050
Reggie came out. So I was able to spend that
1470
00:53:42.150 --> 00:53:45.110
time preparing with him. And then I went on to Rio.
1471
00:53:45.750 --> 00:53:47.570
um by myself.
1472
00:53:47.110 --> 00:53:49.590
So it's expensive because he would have been over two
1473
00:53:49.630 --> 00:53:51.050
then you would have to pay for a seat to
1474
00:53:51.070 --> 00:53:53.690
get into brazil do.
1475
00:53:52.989 --> 00:53:56.250
You know what the most stressful part of that was
1476
00:53:56.469 --> 00:53:58.829
um the journey that my husband had to take with
1477
00:53:58.869 --> 00:54:02.530
him to barcelona because he was like two and obviously
1478
00:54:02.570 --> 00:54:06.369
like two year olds on flights are not fun and
1479
00:54:06.429 --> 00:54:09.110
i remember just meeting my husband at the airport like
1480
00:54:09.130 --> 00:54:10.880
so excited to see them And.
1481
00:54:10.840 --> 00:54:12.340
He was just like sweating.
1482
00:54:12.639 --> 00:54:13.659
He was sweating.
1483
00:54:13.679 --> 00:54:17.800
He looked so stressed. And Reggie had like the reddest face.
1484
00:54:17.860 --> 00:54:19.550
And I was like, what happened?
1485
00:54:20.070 --> 00:54:22.070
And he was like, I'll tell you what happened.
1486
00:54:22.510 --> 00:54:24.150
He didn't want to let go of his bunny on
1487
00:54:24.190 --> 00:54:27.349
the flight. He wanted to shut the windows. And obviously
1488
00:54:27.389 --> 00:54:30.579
you can't, not like the kind of slider things.
1489
00:54:31.070 --> 00:54:33.809
And he just totally lost his shit.
1490
00:54:34.369 --> 00:54:36.489
And he, Andy was like, my husband was like, it
1491
00:54:36.510 --> 00:54:38.690
was the most stressful thing he's ever done. Even to
1492
00:54:38.710 --> 00:54:44.619
this day, he's like, that Barcelona flight.
1493
00:54:44.699 --> 00:54:46.800
When you're at the Olympics, was there part of you going,
1494
00:54:46.980 --> 00:54:53.559
I'm getting a lovely sleep here. This is a real, this,
1495
00:54:53.699 --> 00:54:55.659
I mean, it's meant to be stressful being at the Olympics,
1496
00:54:55.699 --> 00:54:57.280
but I'll be honest, it's the most chilled out I've
1497
00:54:57.300 --> 00:54:58.079
been in three years.
1498
00:54:58.820 --> 00:55:01.510
Well, to be honest, my husband's always like, you know
1499
00:55:01.530 --> 00:55:02.989
that holiday you had in Rio?
1500
00:55:03.010 --> 00:55:05.269
He's like, are you joking me?
1501
00:55:05.710 --> 00:55:06.969
It's the Olympics.
1502
00:55:07.090 --> 00:55:09.409
It's the most stressful environment ever.
1503
00:55:10.510 --> 00:55:13.289
But yeah, I mean, yeah, I had a full night's sleep.
1504
00:55:13.389 --> 00:55:16.449
So it was a little bit of a holiday.
1505
00:55:16.489 --> 00:55:18.809
You can't be getting up with a kid the night
1506
00:55:18.849 --> 00:55:20.349
before you're competing.
1507
00:55:19.869 --> 00:55:20.630
In the Olympics. No.
1508
00:55:21.559 --> 00:55:24.480
Oh, my gosh, no. I mean, you need full sleep, yeah.
1509
00:55:24.579 --> 00:55:27.940
For two days of competition, you need your rest.
1510
00:55:28.159 --> 00:55:30.980
And if you aren't, you know, happily married with kids,
1511
00:55:31.659 --> 00:55:35.090
Josh wanted to know this, is the Olympic Village the complete.
1512
00:55:34.750 --> 00:55:36.909
Fuckfest we all imagine it is? Is it like the
1513
00:55:36.929 --> 00:55:38.050
Love Island after party?
1514
00:55:38.070 --> 00:55:40.869
Well, look, all I'll say, because through the last leg,
1515
00:55:40.889 --> 00:55:42.949
we've done a lot of work at the Paralympics, and
1516
00:55:42.969 --> 00:55:45.530
there's a lot of chat that is basically freshers' week
1517
00:55:46.000 --> 00:55:46.219
in the.
1518
00:55:48.090 --> 00:55:49.269
In the Paralympic village?
1519
00:55:49.289 --> 00:55:51.309
I mean, I wouldn't know, essentially.
1520
00:55:51.349 --> 00:55:55.659
Obviously. Of course you wouldn't, Dame Jessica. Obviously.
1521
00:55:56.139 --> 00:55:58.360
But, yeah, I mean, there's a lot that goes on
1522
00:55:58.420 --> 00:55:58.920
in the village.
1523
00:55:59.480 --> 00:56:01.119
There's a lot that goes on.
1524
00:56:01.199 --> 00:56:04.619
And there's just so many different, like, types of people
1525
00:56:04.679 --> 00:56:07.400
and athletes. And, you know, when you're training so hard, like,
1526
00:56:07.539 --> 00:56:10.090
all the time, and you can never let yourself, like,
1527
00:56:10.289 --> 00:56:13.199
go or switch off, And then you put everyone into
1528
00:56:13.219 --> 00:56:16.280
that environment together. And then I'm sure you know, like,
1529
00:56:16.380 --> 00:56:18.380
you know, the swimmers finish quite early.
1530
00:56:18.260 --> 00:56:19.139
On in the schedule.
1531
00:56:19.159 --> 00:56:22.889
So they're all, like, really excited. And then athletics finishes
1532
00:56:22.929 --> 00:56:27.010
a little bit later. So there is, like, this whole sexual, like,
1533
00:56:27.090 --> 00:56:27.989
vibe going on.
1534
00:56:28.010 --> 00:56:31.070
Like, everyone is just so, like, buzzing. Everyone's either, like,
1535
00:56:31.159 --> 00:56:36.039
buzzing because they've won or they're sad. Also, everyone's fit. Yeah, exactly.
1536
00:56:36.179 --> 00:56:40.639
Everyone's, like, super athletic, and everyone's, yeah, either, like, buzzing,
1537
00:56:40.679 --> 00:56:43.219
like you say, because they've done so well, or they've.
1538
00:56:43.239 --> 00:56:44.969
Like, totally fucked up.
1539
00:56:45.110 --> 00:56:47.909
Yeah, and then want to celebrate, so, yeah.
1540
00:56:49.570 --> 00:56:51.510
That's it for this special Best Of episode.
1541
00:56:56.730 --> 00:56:58.980
I'm Natalie Cassidy, and I've been wanting to do a
1542
00:56:59.019 --> 00:57:01.440
podcast of my own for a very long time, and
1543
00:57:01.480 --> 00:57:03.880
here it is. I'm going to be talking each week
1544
00:57:04.039 --> 00:57:08.019
to family, friends, most importantly, you. I want to talk
1545
00:57:08.059 --> 00:57:10.260
about the issues that are bothering me, things that make
1546
00:57:10.280 --> 00:57:12.880
me smile, and how we get through that washing basket
1547
00:57:12.900 --> 00:57:15.840
without having a nervous breakdown. This is a podcast for
1548
00:57:15.860 --> 00:57:18.780
the general public, for the normal people. So get on board,
1549
00:57:19.000 --> 00:57:21.659
become part of my community, and let's have a laugh.
1550
00:57:26.300 --> 00:57:30.280
Hello, it's me, Jessica Knappett, and here, here, here, here,
1551
00:57:30.300 --> 00:57:33.769
brand new podcast alert. I've got a new show for you.
1552
00:57:34.130 --> 00:57:38.449
It's called Perfect Day. And yeah, you've figured out the
1553
00:57:38.489 --> 00:57:42.090
premise already, haven't you? Because you're so smart and because
1554
00:57:42.130 --> 00:57:46.530
it's obvious. Every Thursday, I interview a guest about what
1555
00:57:46.610 --> 00:57:51.380
constitutes their perfect day. So if you like hopes and dreams,
1556
00:57:52.340 --> 00:57:57.159
fantasies and sweet memories, you're going to love this stuff. Ah,
1557
00:57:57.840 --> 00:58:01.820
we have got so many lovely, funny, nice people on.
1558
00:58:02.159 --> 00:58:03.780
Your Ramesh Ranganathan's, your.
1559
00:58:03.699 --> 00:58:07.000
Dolly Alderton's, your Jamali Maddox's, Arabella Weir, she's doing it.
1560
00:58:07.119 --> 00:58:09.320
Don't worry about the quality of the guest. Just worry
1561
00:58:09.360 --> 00:58:11.219
about when you're going to listen to it. Or don't
1562
00:58:11.260 --> 00:58:12.559
worry about when you're going to listen to it. Just
1563
00:58:12.760 --> 00:58:13.730
actually listen to it.
1564
00:58:14.079 --> 00:58:14.780
See you soon.
1565
00:58:15.780 --> 00:58:28.789
Jess Knapp here, signing off, wishing you a perfect day.
1566
00:58:29.750 --> 00:58:31.929
Perfect day on all your favourite podcast platforms.