00:00:00,160 --> 00:00:01,440
Carol Cox:
When the stakes are high,
2
00:00:01,480 --> 00:00:03,640
whether it's on stage or in a media
3
00:00:03,640 --> 00:00:05,800
interview. How can you stay calm,
4
00:00:05,800 --> 00:00:07,360
clear and confident?
5
00:00:07,520 --> 00:00:09,640
My guest today is Jen Mueller,
6
00:00:09,680 --> 00:00:12,240
a veteran sports broadcaster of the Seattle
7
00:00:12,240 --> 00:00:14,160
Seahawks and the Seattle Mariners.
8
00:00:14,160 --> 00:00:16,760
And she's giving us her tips on this episode
9
00:00:16,760 --> 00:00:18,560
of the Speaking Your Brand podcast.
10
00:00:22,760 --> 00:00:25,320
More and more women are making an impact by
11
00:00:25,320 --> 00:00:28,040
starting businesses, running for office and
12
00:00:28,040 --> 00:00:29,960
speaking up for what matters.
13
00:00:30,280 --> 00:00:33,080
With my background as a TV political analyst,
14
00:00:33,080 --> 00:00:34,640
entrepreneur, and speaker,
15
00:00:34,880 --> 00:00:37,640
I interview and coach purpose driven women to
16
00:00:37,680 --> 00:00:40,160
shape their brands, grow their companies,
17
00:00:40,160 --> 00:00:43,000
and become recognized as influencers in their
18
00:00:43,000 --> 00:00:46,200
field. This is speaking your brand,
19
00:00:46,200 --> 00:00:48,560
your place to learn how to persuasively
20
00:00:48,560 --> 00:00:51,840
communicate your message to your audience.
21
00:00:53,080 --> 00:00:54,520
Hi there and welcome to the Speaking Your
22
00:00:54,520 --> 00:00:55,920
Brand podcast. I'm your host,
23
00:00:55,920 --> 00:00:58,360
Carol Cox. Have you ever had one of those
24
00:00:58,360 --> 00:01:01,620
moments where all eyes are suddenly on you
25
00:01:01,940 --> 00:01:04,220
and your brain decides now is the perfect
26
00:01:04,260 --> 00:01:07,060
time to forget every word you were going to
27
00:01:07,100 --> 00:01:09,500
say. Whether it's a big presentation,
28
00:01:09,540 --> 00:01:11,940
a media interview, or even a meeting.
29
00:01:12,140 --> 00:01:14,740
How we communicate under pressure can make or
30
00:01:14,740 --> 00:01:17,780
break how we're perceived as leaders.
31
00:01:18,060 --> 00:01:20,020
That's why I'm so excited about today's
32
00:01:20,020 --> 00:01:22,020
conversation with my guest,
33
00:01:22,060 --> 00:01:24,900
Jen Mueller. Jen is a veteran sports
34
00:01:24,940 --> 00:01:27,540
broadcaster on the sidelines for the Seattle
35
00:01:27,580 --> 00:01:29,740
Seahawks and the Seattle Mariners,
36
00:01:29,940 --> 00:01:33,140
and she spent over 25 years covering some of
37
00:01:33,140 --> 00:01:35,700
the highest stakes environments imaginable.
38
00:01:35,940 --> 00:01:38,460
She's also the founder of Talk Sporty to Me.
39
00:01:38,500 --> 00:01:40,300
I love that name, where she teaches
40
00:01:40,300 --> 00:01:42,140
professionals how to communicate with
41
00:01:42,140 --> 00:01:45,460
confidence, clarity and composure no matter
42
00:01:45,460 --> 00:01:48,060
the situation. In our conversation,
43
00:01:48,060 --> 00:01:50,220
Jen and I talk about what it means to be a
44
00:01:50,220 --> 00:01:53,300
clutch communicator, how to use those high
45
00:01:53,300 --> 00:01:56,460
pressure moments to showcase your expertise
46
00:01:56,460 --> 00:01:57,940
instead of hiding from them.
47
00:01:58,260 --> 00:02:01,120
How to prepare for spontaneity.
48
00:02:01,160 --> 00:02:02,600
Yes, that is possible.
49
00:02:02,840 --> 00:02:05,800
And how small everyday interactions can train
50
00:02:05,800 --> 00:02:07,440
you for the big stage.
51
00:02:07,760 --> 00:02:10,720
Now, I've also spent the past 20 years on the
52
00:02:10,720 --> 00:02:13,480
TV news during election seasons,
53
00:02:13,480 --> 00:02:16,000
so I know what it's like to be live and not
54
00:02:16,000 --> 00:02:18,280
know what's going to happen next or what
55
00:02:18,280 --> 00:02:20,280
you'll be asked. And I share in this episode
56
00:02:20,280 --> 00:02:23,040
a story of what happened when I was asked a
57
00:02:23,040 --> 00:02:25,680
question and I just totally froze,
58
00:02:25,680 --> 00:02:26,840
but how I handled it.
59
00:02:27,080 --> 00:02:29,160
So if you've ever found yourself thinking,
60
00:02:29,160 --> 00:02:30,720
I wish I could stay calm,
61
00:02:30,760 --> 00:02:33,200
clear and confident when the heat is on.
62
00:02:33,240 --> 00:02:35,400
This episode is for you!
63
00:02:35,720 --> 00:02:37,520
Jen, welcome to the Speaking Your Brand
64
00:02:37,520 --> 00:02:38,280
podcast.
65
00:02:38,560 --> 00:02:40,320
Jen Mueller:
Thank you. This is going to be a fun
66
00:02:40,320 --> 00:02:42,480
conversation. I like it when two media
67
00:02:42,480 --> 00:02:44,840
members get together because I feel like I'm
68
00:02:44,880 --> 00:02:46,400
a little less on the hot seat,
69
00:02:46,440 --> 00:02:48,520
you know? Okay, like, you get me.
70
00:02:49,000 --> 00:02:50,120
Carol Cox:
I get you. And trust me,
71
00:02:50,120 --> 00:02:53,160
I have my own stories to share about things
72
00:02:53,160 --> 00:02:54,640
because those are the ones that stick in your
73
00:02:54,640 --> 00:02:55,560
mind, right?
74
00:02:55,600 --> 00:02:57,160
Jen Mueller:
Yes. Yes they are.
75
00:02:58,040 --> 00:03:00,700
Carol Cox:
All right. So you have you spent a lot of
76
00:03:00,700 --> 00:03:02,500
years reporting from the sidelines?
77
00:03:02,500 --> 00:03:05,020
First tell me, how did that even come about?
78
00:03:05,060 --> 00:03:07,260
Like, how do you get to be a reporter on the
79
00:03:07,260 --> 00:03:10,460
sidelines of these big professional sports?
80
00:03:10,620 --> 00:03:12,420
Jen Mueller:
You know what? Mine is a little bit of an
81
00:03:12,420 --> 00:03:14,500
unconventional path, and I call them bubble
82
00:03:14,540 --> 00:03:16,660
gum moments. All of the little things that I
83
00:03:16,660 --> 00:03:19,700
was doing in the dark behind the scenes to
84
00:03:19,780 --> 00:03:21,940
eventually be considered on air talent.
85
00:03:21,940 --> 00:03:23,700
I was never hired to be,
86
00:03:23,940 --> 00:03:27,300
um, on TV. I never applied for the job of the
87
00:03:27,300 --> 00:03:28,980
sideline reporter for the Seahawks.
88
00:03:29,220 --> 00:03:31,860
What I am by heart, by nature,
89
00:03:31,860 --> 00:03:33,980
and I think at heart is a producer.
90
00:03:33,980 --> 00:03:36,580
So I spent a lot of years watching people on
91
00:03:36,580 --> 00:03:38,940
TV and writing for people on TV,
92
00:03:39,180 --> 00:03:40,700
developing my own style,
93
00:03:40,700 --> 00:03:42,460
learning by watching them,
94
00:03:42,460 --> 00:03:45,060
and then just positioning myself as somebody
95
00:03:45,060 --> 00:03:47,780
who could step in and do the job of the on
96
00:03:47,780 --> 00:03:48,580
air part.
97
00:03:49,260 --> 00:03:51,260
Carol Cox:
All right. So then so you get this,
98
00:03:51,460 --> 00:03:53,940
this opportunity to be on the sidelines to
99
00:03:53,980 --> 00:03:56,700
report what's going on in the games.
100
00:03:56,700 --> 00:03:59,680
So what what is that like to be there on the
101
00:03:59,680 --> 00:04:01,360
silence. Obviously, there's a lot going on,
102
00:04:01,400 --> 00:04:03,000
right? The game's going on. All the players
103
00:04:03,000 --> 00:04:04,800
are there, the coaches, the people in the
104
00:04:04,800 --> 00:04:06,440
stands. Like, tell us what that environment
105
00:04:06,440 --> 00:04:07,040
is like.
106
00:04:07,440 --> 00:04:09,640
Jen Mueller:
An NFL game is electric.
107
00:04:09,640 --> 00:04:11,280
It does not matter where you are now.
108
00:04:11,280 --> 00:04:13,480
They happen to be just a little bit more
109
00:04:13,480 --> 00:04:15,960
electric in Seattle because the crowd at
110
00:04:16,000 --> 00:04:17,720
Lumen Field is unreal,
111
00:04:17,720 --> 00:04:21,160
but it is sensory overload from being so
112
00:04:21,160 --> 00:04:23,880
close to the action and seeing how physically
113
00:04:23,880 --> 00:04:27,400
imposing and strong and powerful these guys
114
00:04:27,400 --> 00:04:30,200
are to hearing everything from the stands.
115
00:04:30,200 --> 00:04:32,680
And the thing about being on the sidelines,
116
00:04:32,920 --> 00:04:34,800
I love watching the game there.
117
00:04:35,000 --> 00:04:37,280
You can only see a very small part of the
118
00:04:37,280 --> 00:04:40,040
game, and that's where like the communication
119
00:04:40,040 --> 00:04:42,280
and the questions and how you piece together
120
00:04:42,280 --> 00:04:44,840
the story of the game is very different than
121
00:04:44,840 --> 00:04:47,560
if you were watching from home or watching
122
00:04:47,560 --> 00:04:50,280
from the press box, or even from the 200
123
00:04:50,320 --> 00:04:52,280
level in a stadium, because you've got a
124
00:04:52,280 --> 00:04:54,000
different vantage point than I do.
125
00:04:54,000 --> 00:04:58,320
And so I constantly feel like I am stumped on
126
00:04:58,320 --> 00:05:01,270
the sidelines and am trying to overcome that
127
00:05:01,270 --> 00:05:03,110
in the conversations I have during
128
00:05:03,110 --> 00:05:03,790
interviews.
129
00:05:04,270 --> 00:05:06,550
Carol Cox:
So then tell us what it's like to do an
130
00:05:06,550 --> 00:05:07,590
interview then.
131
00:05:07,590 --> 00:05:09,230
So obviously you have to kind of tune out
132
00:05:09,230 --> 00:05:11,390
everything else that's going on around you to
133
00:05:11,430 --> 00:05:13,670
focus on the person that you're interviewing
134
00:05:13,670 --> 00:05:16,230
now. Do you already have some questions that
135
00:05:16,230 --> 00:05:17,870
you're running in your mind beforehand? Like,
136
00:05:17,870 --> 00:05:19,310
tell us a little bit about the prep and then
137
00:05:19,310 --> 00:05:20,790
what happens during the interview.
138
00:05:20,990 --> 00:05:23,550
Jen Mueller:
Yeah, I should have grabbed my pages of notes
139
00:05:23,550 --> 00:05:25,510
that I take during an NFL game,
140
00:05:25,510 --> 00:05:27,430
because when you're on the sidelines, you're
141
00:05:27,430 --> 00:05:28,550
kind of on your own.
142
00:05:28,550 --> 00:05:30,030
I've got my crew in the booth,
143
00:05:30,030 --> 00:05:32,270
but they are dealing with their own,
144
00:05:32,390 --> 00:05:34,550
you know, game calls, so they don't have time
145
00:05:34,550 --> 00:05:36,950
to look things up just for me.
146
00:05:36,950 --> 00:05:40,590
So I keep just a running tally of both plays
147
00:05:40,590 --> 00:05:43,790
and questions, and I will start writing down
148
00:05:43,790 --> 00:05:46,910
questions I might want to ask from the very
149
00:05:46,910 --> 00:05:47,950
first play of the game,
150
00:05:47,950 --> 00:05:49,790
because you don't know what's going to end up
151
00:05:49,790 --> 00:05:51,430
to be most important at the end.
152
00:05:51,750 --> 00:05:55,190
The other part of my job is the expectation
153
00:05:55,190 --> 00:05:57,390
is that I will get between 4 and 6
154
00:05:57,390 --> 00:05:59,890
interviews, Use regardless of the outcome.
155
00:06:00,170 --> 00:06:02,210
If you need 4 to 6 interviews,
156
00:06:02,210 --> 00:06:04,330
you can't be asking the same four questions
157
00:06:04,330 --> 00:06:06,170
over and over and over again.
158
00:06:06,210 --> 00:06:08,210
You've got to tailor those questions to the
159
00:06:08,210 --> 00:06:10,290
person, to the position that they play,
160
00:06:10,290 --> 00:06:12,130
to the time of the game that you're talking
161
00:06:12,130 --> 00:06:14,890
about. And so I constantly have kind of these
162
00:06:14,890 --> 00:06:17,570
running lists and various points in the game
163
00:06:17,570 --> 00:06:20,050
that I'll start compiling that so that I can
164
00:06:20,050 --> 00:06:22,970
be very concise and precise when I'm doing
165
00:06:22,970 --> 00:06:23,970
those interviews.
166
00:06:24,730 --> 00:06:26,650
Carol Cox:
And also, I assume you want the interviews to
167
00:06:26,690 --> 00:06:28,890
be interesting for the the people who are
168
00:06:28,890 --> 00:06:30,930
watching. You can't just like, like boring,
169
00:06:30,930 --> 00:06:33,170
dull questions that everyone always asks.
170
00:06:33,370 --> 00:06:35,730
Jen Mueller:
Well, and see, you just hit the nail on the
171
00:06:35,730 --> 00:06:38,610
head right there. If I can guess what your
172
00:06:38,610 --> 00:06:40,170
post-game question will be.
173
00:06:40,210 --> 00:06:42,130
And I'm sitting on my couch and I only
174
00:06:42,130 --> 00:06:43,930
watched five minutes of that game.
175
00:06:44,330 --> 00:06:47,330
There was probably a better way to ask that
176
00:06:47,330 --> 00:06:49,850
question. And one of the things I realized
177
00:06:49,850 --> 00:06:51,570
very early on, and I know that you'll
178
00:06:51,570 --> 00:06:52,730
appreciate this.
179
00:06:53,090 --> 00:06:56,170
Our questions are part of the story as
180
00:06:56,170 --> 00:06:59,830
compared to my counterparts who work in print
181
00:06:59,830 --> 00:07:01,830
media, right? Who work for magazines,
182
00:07:01,830 --> 00:07:03,470
who work for the digital side,
183
00:07:03,550 --> 00:07:04,990
who work for newspapers.
184
00:07:05,150 --> 00:07:07,070
They can ask whatever they question they
185
00:07:07,070 --> 00:07:10,190
want, and their audience never hears it.
186
00:07:10,430 --> 00:07:13,470
But my audience always hears the question
187
00:07:13,470 --> 00:07:16,590
that I ask. And so it's my job to make that
188
00:07:16,590 --> 00:07:20,390
question interesting, but also to make sure
189
00:07:20,390 --> 00:07:23,030
that I am drawing out the very best piece of
190
00:07:23,030 --> 00:07:26,870
information without tap dancing around and
191
00:07:26,870 --> 00:07:29,350
taking, you know, forever to get to the heart
192
00:07:29,350 --> 00:07:31,310
of what it is that we're talking about.
193
00:07:31,950 --> 00:07:34,550
Carol Cox:
Yeah, I can imagine that is it's a delicate
194
00:07:34,550 --> 00:07:36,830
dance, and I assume that you got better at it
195
00:07:36,830 --> 00:07:38,270
as you went along.
196
00:07:38,470 --> 00:07:40,270
You know, the first few games versus after
197
00:07:40,270 --> 00:07:41,670
you've been doing it for years.
198
00:07:41,910 --> 00:07:43,190
Jen Mueller:
Yeah, I've done this now.
199
00:07:43,190 --> 00:07:45,590
I've been in sports broadcasting 25 years,
200
00:07:45,590 --> 00:07:47,910
17 on the Seahawks sidelines.
201
00:07:48,070 --> 00:07:50,150
And you know, they don't really teach you how
202
00:07:50,150 --> 00:07:52,110
to ask questions in college.
203
00:07:52,230 --> 00:07:53,830
You know, they they teach you the very
204
00:07:53,830 --> 00:07:56,310
technical aspects of broadcasting.
205
00:07:56,310 --> 00:07:57,750
And that's very helpful.
206
00:07:58,050 --> 00:08:00,330
But if you are sent out there to ask
207
00:08:00,330 --> 00:08:04,130
questions and to do an interview initially,
208
00:08:04,130 --> 00:08:05,850
your standard is going to be too low.
209
00:08:05,970 --> 00:08:08,370
In fact, I think a lot of standards are too
210
00:08:08,370 --> 00:08:10,170
low when it comes to asking questions,
211
00:08:10,170 --> 00:08:12,930
because we assume that if we get an answer
212
00:08:13,050 --> 00:08:14,610
that it was a good enough question.
213
00:08:14,850 --> 00:08:18,090
And that's not true, because most people are
214
00:08:18,130 --> 00:08:20,090
kind enough and considerate enough to give
215
00:08:20,090 --> 00:08:22,290
you an answer, whether it's a good one,
216
00:08:22,290 --> 00:08:23,930
the right one, the one that you were looking
217
00:08:23,930 --> 00:08:26,570
for, that is an entirely different story.
218
00:08:26,770 --> 00:08:29,330
And so what I have gotten very good at is
219
00:08:29,330 --> 00:08:32,050
asking very specific questions.
220
00:08:32,050 --> 00:08:34,650
There is only one answer to that question.
221
00:08:34,650 --> 00:08:37,690
And my athletes learn to trust me because
222
00:08:37,690 --> 00:08:40,010
they know they are the ones that have that
223
00:08:40,010 --> 00:08:41,850
answer. Right. I'm not trying to play this
224
00:08:41,890 --> 00:08:43,850
like gotcha game.
225
00:08:44,050 --> 00:08:46,330
I just want you to drop your guard and tell
226
00:08:46,330 --> 00:08:49,330
me what happened on that play in the third
227
00:08:49,330 --> 00:08:52,050
quarter, where you allowed them to convert on
228
00:08:52,050 --> 00:08:53,010
third and 12.
229
00:08:53,890 --> 00:08:56,010
Carol Cox:
I love it. Now, I grew up watching football
230
00:08:56,010 --> 00:08:57,870
because my dad and I, we would watch it,
231
00:08:57,910 --> 00:08:59,910
you know, on the weekends. So I loved it.
232
00:08:59,910 --> 00:09:01,830
I don't watch it as much as as I used to,
233
00:09:01,870 --> 00:09:03,510
but it is a lot of fun.
234
00:09:03,510 --> 00:09:04,750
So that is so cool.
235
00:09:04,750 --> 00:09:06,950
I have not been into an NFL game ever in my
236
00:09:06,950 --> 00:09:08,750
life, and that is something that's on my list
237
00:09:08,750 --> 00:09:10,750
because I know how what an incredible
238
00:09:10,750 --> 00:09:11,750
experience it would be.
239
00:09:12,030 --> 00:09:14,670
Jen Mueller:
It really is like you'll be talking about it
240
00:09:14,670 --> 00:09:18,590
for forever because every sporting event is
241
00:09:18,590 --> 00:09:19,710
an event, right?
242
00:09:19,710 --> 00:09:21,390
There's food, there's entertainment, there's
243
00:09:21,390 --> 00:09:23,110
people, there's a social aspect.
244
00:09:23,110 --> 00:09:25,110
So whether you remember the details of the
245
00:09:25,110 --> 00:09:28,510
game or not, boy, are there so many talking
246
00:09:28,510 --> 00:09:30,070
points off of an NFL game.
247
00:09:30,790 --> 00:09:32,910
Carol Cox:
All right, Jen, let's talk about this idea of
248
00:09:32,950 --> 00:09:34,510
a clutch communicator.
249
00:09:34,510 --> 00:09:36,750
This is a phrase that you brought to me for
250
00:09:36,750 --> 00:09:38,550
this interview. So what does that mean to be
251
00:09:38,550 --> 00:09:41,110
a clutch communicator and why is that
252
00:09:41,110 --> 00:09:43,150
important not only for reporters,
253
00:09:43,190 --> 00:09:44,710
you know, on the sidelines or wherever they
254
00:09:44,710 --> 00:09:46,350
happen to be, but for those of us who are
255
00:09:46,350 --> 00:09:48,230
just doing presentations and panels and
256
00:09:48,230 --> 00:09:49,470
podcast interviews.
257
00:09:49,630 --> 00:09:52,670
Jen Mueller:
Yeah, it's knowing that you are prepared for
258
00:09:52,670 --> 00:09:56,070
any moment and that the uncertainty is
259
00:09:56,290 --> 00:09:59,610
Minimized by the confidence you have in your
260
00:09:59,610 --> 00:10:01,850
skills, right? Every time we have a
261
00:10:01,850 --> 00:10:04,410
conversation or we ask a question,
262
00:10:04,610 --> 00:10:07,170
we're really leaving things up to chance.
263
00:10:07,410 --> 00:10:09,410
I might think I know the answer,
264
00:10:09,410 --> 00:10:11,330
and I have a pretty good idea of how a
265
00:10:11,370 --> 00:10:13,010
conversation is going to flow.
266
00:10:13,210 --> 00:10:14,890
But in the back of my mind,
267
00:10:14,890 --> 00:10:17,290
before I have entered this conversation,
268
00:10:17,290 --> 00:10:19,890
whether it is an interview that I am
269
00:10:19,890 --> 00:10:22,890
conducting or where I'm in this position,
270
00:10:23,210 --> 00:10:27,810
I know a few things that I can do to minimize
271
00:10:27,850 --> 00:10:31,130
my doubts and like the self-consciousness
272
00:10:31,130 --> 00:10:33,450
that I might have, I know how to pivot out of
273
00:10:33,490 --> 00:10:35,250
a of a challenging situation,
274
00:10:35,250 --> 00:10:37,530
or when I've forgotten a word or lose my
275
00:10:37,530 --> 00:10:38,570
train of thought.
276
00:10:38,570 --> 00:10:41,090
And it's those sorts of things that make you
277
00:10:41,130 --> 00:10:43,690
clutch. It's not saying the right thing every
278
00:10:43,730 --> 00:10:46,410
time. It's knowing that you have something to
279
00:10:46,450 --> 00:10:48,730
say and being confident enough in that
280
00:10:48,730 --> 00:10:49,450
ability.
281
00:10:50,410 --> 00:10:52,730
Carol Cox:
Now, Jen, I know that a lot of the women that
282
00:10:52,730 --> 00:10:54,530
we work with and a lot of women who listen to
283
00:10:54,570 --> 00:10:57,430
this podcast, they like to be very prepared,
284
00:10:57,430 --> 00:10:59,270
whether it again is for a presentation,
285
00:10:59,310 --> 00:11:01,270
a talk. That they're delivering or a podcast
286
00:11:01,270 --> 00:11:02,750
interview. And that is great.
287
00:11:02,790 --> 00:11:04,190
Obviously we want to be prepared.
288
00:11:04,190 --> 00:11:06,950
We want to to make sure that we are providing
289
00:11:06,950 --> 00:11:09,870
value to whoever is listening to us.
290
00:11:09,870 --> 00:11:12,670
But I feel like there are also a lot of us
291
00:11:12,670 --> 00:11:16,910
who get very worried about getting a question
292
00:11:16,910 --> 00:11:18,910
that they haven't prepared for,
293
00:11:19,110 --> 00:11:21,950
and they almost they sort themselves out with
294
00:11:21,990 --> 00:11:23,590
thinking that that's going to happen whether
295
00:11:23,590 --> 00:11:25,510
it happens or not. So can you tell us a
296
00:11:25,510 --> 00:11:27,550
little bit about what is going on there and
297
00:11:27,550 --> 00:11:29,750
how how can we help ourselves with that?
298
00:11:30,070 --> 00:11:31,550
Jen Mueller:
Well, you've got to remember that you're the
299
00:11:31,550 --> 00:11:33,950
expert. The reason that you are fielding that
300
00:11:33,950 --> 00:11:37,230
question is because you have some version of
301
00:11:37,230 --> 00:11:39,350
the answer. Most of the time,
302
00:11:39,350 --> 00:11:42,750
people are not looking for the hard,
303
00:11:42,790 --> 00:11:45,670
fast, truest answer that you could possibly
304
00:11:45,670 --> 00:11:48,990
give. What they're looking for is insight and
305
00:11:48,990 --> 00:11:51,910
perspective. So you already have that.
306
00:11:52,150 --> 00:11:55,750
If you try to psych yourself out by thinking
307
00:11:55,750 --> 00:11:58,370
about all the different ways you are not the
308
00:11:58,370 --> 00:12:00,330
right person to be answering this question,
309
00:12:00,330 --> 00:12:01,410
then try this.
310
00:12:01,850 --> 00:12:07,010
In my experience now, I can't dispute that
311
00:12:07,010 --> 00:12:08,730
because in your experience,
312
00:12:08,730 --> 00:12:10,210
whether that is 25 years,
313
00:12:10,210 --> 00:12:12,570
two years, you know, one month on this
314
00:12:12,570 --> 00:12:15,410
project, six months is the CEO.
315
00:12:15,690 --> 00:12:17,130
That's your experience.
316
00:12:17,130 --> 00:12:19,810
And now we have framed this in a way where,
317
00:12:20,090 --> 00:12:23,250
okay, I am seeing you as the expert and you
318
00:12:23,290 --> 00:12:26,010
are giving me insight and perspective based
319
00:12:26,010 --> 00:12:27,490
on that experience.
320
00:12:28,290 --> 00:12:30,450
Carol Cox:
Right? Like I as I say,
321
00:12:30,490 --> 00:12:32,170
AI is not the ultimate expert.
322
00:12:32,170 --> 00:12:33,290
It can tell you.
323
00:12:33,410 --> 00:12:34,610
Google search used to.
324
00:12:34,650 --> 00:12:37,170
Now you know, chatbots can tell you anything
325
00:12:37,170 --> 00:12:38,450
you want to know about.
326
00:12:38,450 --> 00:12:40,570
Anything you ask, whether it hallucinates or
327
00:12:40,570 --> 00:12:42,050
not is another. You know,
328
00:12:42,050 --> 00:12:43,410
we'll put that to the side.
329
00:12:43,410 --> 00:12:45,730
But to your point, your audiences want to
330
00:12:45,770 --> 00:12:47,570
know, well, how did you experience that?
331
00:12:47,610 --> 00:12:49,210
What did you learn from that?
332
00:12:49,250 --> 00:12:51,010
What did you what have you gained?
333
00:12:51,010 --> 00:12:52,650
What are all these lessons and insights and
334
00:12:52,650 --> 00:12:54,450
perspectives you've gained because of this
335
00:12:54,450 --> 00:12:57,080
work that you've been doing for however many
336
00:12:57,080 --> 00:12:59,600
years. Not like reciting off of a dictionary
337
00:12:59,600 --> 00:13:00,760
or encyclopedia.
338
00:13:00,800 --> 00:13:03,440
All the facts that someone could learn about
339
00:13:03,440 --> 00:13:04,640
whatever the topic is.
340
00:13:05,080 --> 00:13:08,000
Jen Mueller:
And it's okay to ask a clarifying question,
341
00:13:08,200 --> 00:13:10,040
right? I mean, you don't want to ask a
342
00:13:10,040 --> 00:13:11,360
question to every question,
343
00:13:11,360 --> 00:13:12,960
right? That gets a little bit tedious,
344
00:13:12,960 --> 00:13:15,400
but it's okay to say, hey,
345
00:13:15,440 --> 00:13:17,560
why do you ask? I want to make sure I give
346
00:13:17,560 --> 00:13:19,440
you the best possible answer.
347
00:13:19,440 --> 00:13:22,040
Or when people say something like,
348
00:13:22,080 --> 00:13:24,400
hey Jen, tell me how you got to where you are
349
00:13:24,400 --> 00:13:27,120
in your career. My first question back to
350
00:13:27,160 --> 00:13:30,840
them will be, what specific part would you
351
00:13:30,840 --> 00:13:32,920
like to know about, or what would be most
352
00:13:32,920 --> 00:13:34,840
helpful for you to hear?
353
00:13:35,040 --> 00:13:37,840
Now, I can be confident that I am giving you
354
00:13:37,840 --> 00:13:39,520
the best possible answer.
355
00:13:39,600 --> 00:13:41,320
It's okay to do that. The guys do that in the
356
00:13:41,320 --> 00:13:44,000
locker room. To me, sometimes if I say
357
00:13:44,320 --> 00:13:46,160
something that is slightly too general,
358
00:13:46,160 --> 00:13:49,000
they'll say, oh, did you mean on that drive
359
00:13:49,000 --> 00:13:50,520
in the third quarter? Yep.
360
00:13:50,520 --> 00:13:51,920
That's exactly what I meant.
361
00:13:51,960 --> 00:13:53,520
Nobody thinks twice about that.
362
00:13:53,520 --> 00:13:55,360
We're just having the conversation.
363
00:13:55,360 --> 00:13:55,420
Station.
364
00:13:56,620 --> 00:14:00,020
Carol Cox:
Yes. Yeah. Because and it's thinking of it as
365
00:14:00,020 --> 00:14:02,340
a conversation. I like to say that even
366
00:14:02,340 --> 00:14:04,060
public speaking, even when you're speaking
367
00:14:04,060 --> 00:14:05,500
from a stage, I liken it,
368
00:14:05,500 --> 00:14:07,540
you're still having a conversation with the
369
00:14:07,540 --> 00:14:08,900
audience. Now, the audience is not
370
00:14:08,900 --> 00:14:11,820
necessarily talking back to you every minute
371
00:14:11,860 --> 00:14:13,740
like you would in a regular conversation, but
372
00:14:13,740 --> 00:14:15,980
you're still sensing their energy.
373
00:14:16,020 --> 00:14:17,580
Where are they getting you? Where are they
374
00:14:17,580 --> 00:14:19,500
maybe a little bit lost or a little bit
375
00:14:19,500 --> 00:14:22,580
confused, and then adjusting as needed based
376
00:14:22,580 --> 00:14:23,860
on what you're getting back from the
377
00:14:23,860 --> 00:14:24,660
audience?
378
00:14:24,660 --> 00:14:26,660
Jen Mueller:
Yeah. And it's trusting yourself in
379
00:14:26,660 --> 00:14:28,020
interactions. Right.
380
00:14:28,060 --> 00:14:29,940
So if it goes back to your original question,
381
00:14:29,940 --> 00:14:32,060
if you can trust yourself to make small talk
382
00:14:32,060 --> 00:14:34,580
with a stranger, you can trust yourself to
383
00:14:34,620 --> 00:14:36,460
answer questions from an audience.
384
00:14:36,980 --> 00:14:38,260
Carol Cox:
Yes, I love that.
385
00:14:38,460 --> 00:14:40,300
Now, Jen, you talk about this idea of
386
00:14:40,300 --> 00:14:41,980
asserting your presence.
387
00:14:41,980 --> 00:14:43,780
Can you tell me what does that mean?
388
00:14:43,820 --> 00:14:45,500
Like what does it mean to assert your
389
00:14:45,500 --> 00:14:48,020
presence? And how has that shown up for you?
390
00:14:48,740 --> 00:14:50,700
Jen Mueller:
When I first got into sports,
391
00:14:50,700 --> 00:14:54,300
they were, let's say, allowing women to work
392
00:14:54,300 --> 00:14:55,720
in sports broadcasting,
393
00:14:55,720 --> 00:14:57,840
but they weren't really encouraging or
394
00:14:57,840 --> 00:15:01,240
supporting. They really didn't know how to to
395
00:15:01,280 --> 00:15:04,480
do that. And so it was up to me to grab those
396
00:15:04,480 --> 00:15:05,720
really small moments.
397
00:15:05,720 --> 00:15:08,640
I knew that I wasn't going to get an hour to
398
00:15:08,680 --> 00:15:10,120
make a great impression.
399
00:15:10,120 --> 00:15:12,720
I was going to be able to show up to a press
400
00:15:12,720 --> 00:15:15,280
conference and ask one question.
401
00:15:15,560 --> 00:15:18,200
Maybe it was just sitting in the press
402
00:15:18,200 --> 00:15:21,720
conference was my way of being present and
403
00:15:21,720 --> 00:15:23,720
asserting my presence.
404
00:15:23,880 --> 00:15:27,120
And we overlook these little moments all the
405
00:15:27,120 --> 00:15:29,240
time throughout the day. But I would show up
406
00:15:29,400 --> 00:15:32,240
and I would make sure that I had on a
407
00:15:32,240 --> 00:15:34,200
different color blazer that day.
408
00:15:34,240 --> 00:15:35,600
Right? So instead of wearing black and
409
00:15:35,600 --> 00:15:37,480
everybody's wearing black, I've got a teal
410
00:15:37,520 --> 00:15:40,040
green blazer on so that when my hand goes up,
411
00:15:40,040 --> 00:15:42,320
I'm the one that is going to get called on
412
00:15:42,320 --> 00:15:43,480
when I get called on.
413
00:15:43,480 --> 00:15:45,880
I've got the one question that it is that I
414
00:15:45,920 --> 00:15:48,640
wanted to ask, and I will deliver that with
415
00:15:48,640 --> 00:15:51,880
precision and with a confidence in my tone
416
00:15:52,120 --> 00:15:53,600
that forces you to think,
417
00:15:53,640 --> 00:15:55,660
oh, that was a good question.
418
00:15:55,660 --> 00:15:58,700
Or ah, she was prepared for that moment.
419
00:15:58,700 --> 00:16:01,580
And it's not about how many words you say,
420
00:16:01,780 --> 00:16:05,460
it's about how you choose to show up and how
421
00:16:05,460 --> 00:16:07,940
consistent you are with showing up.
422
00:16:08,100 --> 00:16:10,500
People underestimate that part of it too,
423
00:16:10,700 --> 00:16:12,860
right? If you were in a space where you were
424
00:16:12,860 --> 00:16:14,460
seeing the same people all the time,
425
00:16:14,460 --> 00:16:17,420
this is a huge advantage in how you want to
426
00:16:17,460 --> 00:16:19,300
show up and assert your presence,
427
00:16:19,300 --> 00:16:21,860
whether that is with a smile squaring your
428
00:16:21,860 --> 00:16:23,940
shoulders before you walk in the room,
429
00:16:23,980 --> 00:16:27,260
being very precise in how you greet somebody
430
00:16:27,260 --> 00:16:28,820
or engage in small talk,
431
00:16:28,980 --> 00:16:32,260
and just the way that you show up that is
432
00:16:32,260 --> 00:16:33,580
asserting your presence.
433
00:16:34,220 --> 00:16:37,380
Carol Cox:
What would you say to listeners who are like,
434
00:16:37,380 --> 00:16:39,860
well, I don't really feel like I have a very
435
00:16:39,860 --> 00:16:41,980
assertive presence. You know, my personality
436
00:16:42,020 --> 00:16:44,540
tends to be a little bit on the shyer side.
437
00:16:44,700 --> 00:16:48,140
I don't really I don't have a big voice or,
438
00:16:48,260 --> 00:16:50,660
you know, I don't really like taking up a lot
439
00:16:50,700 --> 00:16:52,620
of space, but they still enjoy speaking.
440
00:16:53,340 --> 00:16:55,040
What are some strategies or tips that could
441
00:16:55,040 --> 00:16:55,640
help them.
442
00:16:56,640 --> 00:16:59,280
Jen Mueller:
It isn't about being somebody that you're
443
00:16:59,280 --> 00:17:03,480
not. It's about maximizing where you see your
444
00:17:03,480 --> 00:17:05,880
strengths, right? And maybe starting with the
445
00:17:05,880 --> 00:17:09,400
smallest like measure of success to build
446
00:17:09,400 --> 00:17:10,680
your confidence in that.
447
00:17:10,760 --> 00:17:13,280
So my smallest measure of success every time
448
00:17:13,280 --> 00:17:16,040
I walk into a locker room is how many guys
449
00:17:16,040 --> 00:17:19,880
say hello. And it's always my goal to get
450
00:17:19,880 --> 00:17:22,160
five hellos when I walk into a locker room or
451
00:17:22,160 --> 00:17:24,640
clubhouse. Now, I am a typically very
452
00:17:24,640 --> 00:17:26,200
outgoing personality.
453
00:17:26,240 --> 00:17:28,720
You put me in a locker room with 60 plus
454
00:17:28,720 --> 00:17:30,520
guys, all of whom are bigger,
455
00:17:30,520 --> 00:17:33,240
faster, stronger, some of them louder and
456
00:17:33,240 --> 00:17:35,320
more boisterous. Boisterous than I am.
457
00:17:36,040 --> 00:17:37,560
And that's enough to make me go,
458
00:17:37,600 --> 00:17:39,800
oh my gosh, what am I doing here some days?
459
00:17:39,840 --> 00:17:41,160
You know, like the days that you're just not
460
00:17:41,160 --> 00:17:44,680
feeling it. And so if I've got a really small
461
00:17:44,680 --> 00:17:47,280
measure of success and all I have to do is
462
00:17:47,280 --> 00:17:50,800
say hi back, I can do that.
463
00:17:50,960 --> 00:17:52,400
And that is showing up.
464
00:17:52,400 --> 00:17:53,960
Everybody can say hi or hello.
465
00:17:54,460 --> 00:17:56,660
We skip over it a lot of times when we're too
466
00:17:56,660 --> 00:17:58,260
busy, which is why it's a win.
467
00:17:58,460 --> 00:18:00,700
But start with something like that.
468
00:18:00,700 --> 00:18:02,340
Just smile at somebody.
469
00:18:02,340 --> 00:18:06,100
You would be shocked at how far smile goes.
470
00:18:06,100 --> 00:18:08,980
And I know because I get feedback from that
471
00:18:08,980 --> 00:18:11,460
all the time from guys in the locker room.
472
00:18:11,540 --> 00:18:13,340
But we skip past that in business all the
473
00:18:13,340 --> 00:18:15,260
time because we take it for granted or we're
474
00:18:15,260 --> 00:18:16,500
not tracking it.
475
00:18:16,540 --> 00:18:18,660
If you start tracking those things,
476
00:18:18,660 --> 00:18:21,220
you would be surprised at just how you were
477
00:18:21,220 --> 00:18:24,260
showing up or how you can use those moments
478
00:18:24,260 --> 00:18:25,980
to show up even better.
479
00:18:26,980 --> 00:18:30,780
Carol Cox:
Jen, how have you handled any sexism that has
480
00:18:30,780 --> 00:18:33,020
come up and not necessarily directly with
481
00:18:33,020 --> 00:18:34,700
people you have interacted with,
482
00:18:34,700 --> 00:18:36,700
but maybe even online?
483
00:18:36,900 --> 00:18:39,180
I remember when I've been doing election
484
00:18:39,180 --> 00:18:41,300
coverage on the news for a long time,
485
00:18:41,540 --> 00:18:43,580
and when this was during in the during the
486
00:18:43,580 --> 00:18:46,340
2016 election cycle, which we know was the
487
00:18:46,340 --> 00:18:48,420
start of very unusual politics.
488
00:18:48,420 --> 00:18:50,700
And so at the time, the news station would
489
00:18:50,940 --> 00:18:53,540
livestream what the news segments to their
490
00:18:53,680 --> 00:18:55,640
Facebook page. That was really big at the
491
00:18:55,640 --> 00:18:57,280
time. Facebook's would be their Facebook
492
00:18:57,280 --> 00:18:59,680
Live, and of course all the comments would
493
00:18:59,680 --> 00:19:02,000
come in. There are no comments of substance,
494
00:19:02,000 --> 00:19:04,600
but their comments about me being a woman.
495
00:19:04,600 --> 00:19:06,280
So I just ignored them because I'm like,
496
00:19:06,280 --> 00:19:07,800
whatever. I don't know these people and I'm
497
00:19:07,800 --> 00:19:09,680
not going to read the comments,
498
00:19:09,680 --> 00:19:12,240
but I'm just curious, have you what have you
499
00:19:12,240 --> 00:19:14,360
experienced and how have you handled it?
500
00:19:15,120 --> 00:19:17,800
Jen Mueller:
I have experienced various forms of that over
501
00:19:17,800 --> 00:19:20,920
the years. Again, when you're a woman in an
502
00:19:20,960 --> 00:19:22,880
NFL locker room 30 years ago,
503
00:19:22,920 --> 00:19:25,160
that is a very different experience than
504
00:19:25,200 --> 00:19:26,480
being in there today.
505
00:19:26,760 --> 00:19:28,680
For a long time I ignored the comments,
506
00:19:28,680 --> 00:19:30,720
and I have worked with some really awesome
507
00:19:30,720 --> 00:19:33,040
people who came to my defense,
508
00:19:33,040 --> 00:19:35,760
or guys who have been awesome to work with.
509
00:19:35,880 --> 00:19:38,440
That helped build my credibility and my
510
00:19:38,440 --> 00:19:40,400
reputation among the fans.
511
00:19:40,800 --> 00:19:43,680
I did not engage with most of those people
512
00:19:43,680 --> 00:19:45,120
online for years.
513
00:19:45,120 --> 00:19:48,680
It has only been in the last 3 to 4 years
514
00:19:48,880 --> 00:19:51,720
where I feel comfortable enough not only with
515
00:19:51,720 --> 00:19:55,620
my position as I've got enough experience
516
00:19:55,620 --> 00:19:59,460
under my belt, but also I am comfortable with
517
00:19:59,460 --> 00:20:01,020
my voice in this space.
518
00:20:01,220 --> 00:20:03,100
I'm comfortable with saying,
519
00:20:03,900 --> 00:20:06,940
I don't like to hear every man talk about
520
00:20:06,940 --> 00:20:09,020
sports, like it's okay if you don't want
521
00:20:09,020 --> 00:20:10,300
women to talk about sports,
522
00:20:10,300 --> 00:20:12,300
but you make the assumption, I want every man
523
00:20:12,300 --> 00:20:13,540
to talk about sports.
524
00:20:13,820 --> 00:20:15,780
That's not necessarily true either.
525
00:20:15,820 --> 00:20:18,580
Now, that's about as combative as I will get,
526
00:20:18,580 --> 00:20:20,420
and I will just kind of point things out
527
00:20:20,460 --> 00:20:22,980
gently. Right. The assumptions that get made,
528
00:20:23,380 --> 00:20:25,420
um, I do call people out,
529
00:20:25,420 --> 00:20:29,620
but mostly because it's harmful to other
530
00:20:29,620 --> 00:20:31,060
women in the industry,
531
00:20:31,100 --> 00:20:32,980
right? Whether I can take it or not is
532
00:20:32,980 --> 00:20:35,300
irrelevant, but it's harmful to other people
533
00:20:35,300 --> 00:20:37,380
that I work with. And so now,
534
00:20:37,380 --> 00:20:39,940
being at this stage of my career in my life,
535
00:20:40,100 --> 00:20:41,900
I feel like it's easier to speak up for
536
00:20:41,900 --> 00:20:43,500
people and to just kind of point out,
537
00:20:43,540 --> 00:20:45,180
hey, maybe you didn't think about it from
538
00:20:45,180 --> 00:20:46,820
this point of view. Uh,
539
00:20:46,820 --> 00:20:48,620
and I'll pull back the curtain as much as I
540
00:20:48,620 --> 00:20:50,940
possibly can on whatever it is that they are
541
00:20:50,940 --> 00:20:53,640
commenting on. Um, but yeah,
542
00:20:53,640 --> 00:20:56,040
that is that is one of the parts of the job
543
00:20:56,040 --> 00:20:57,800
that is frustrating.
544
00:20:57,800 --> 00:21:00,160
Some nights at the end of a long night or a
545
00:21:00,160 --> 00:21:01,960
long homestand or a long game.
546
00:21:02,000 --> 00:21:02,560
Yes.
547
00:21:03,080 --> 00:21:04,560
Carol Cox:
Well, Jen, thank you for sharing that. And
548
00:21:04,560 --> 00:21:05,960
this is why I asked this question,
549
00:21:05,960 --> 00:21:09,360
because I want more women to understand that
550
00:21:09,600 --> 00:21:11,640
it's it's normal was the wrong word.
551
00:21:11,640 --> 00:21:12,760
But it happens.
552
00:21:12,760 --> 00:21:16,960
And not to feel alone or isolated or like
553
00:21:17,000 --> 00:21:19,800
they they don't have someone to turn to if,
554
00:21:19,840 --> 00:21:21,400
if they are feeling this way,
555
00:21:21,400 --> 00:21:23,520
that it happens. Unfortunately, to many of us
556
00:21:23,520 --> 00:21:25,800
in the public. I like to say women who have a
557
00:21:25,800 --> 00:21:27,440
public presence and a public voice.
558
00:21:27,480 --> 00:21:29,640
Eventually you're going to get some type of
559
00:21:29,840 --> 00:21:31,600
feedback related to that that you're not
560
00:21:31,600 --> 00:21:33,920
necessarily going to enjoy and is probably
561
00:21:33,920 --> 00:21:36,040
unfounded, but just know that you're not
562
00:21:36,040 --> 00:21:38,720
alone. And I like to make sure I have my
563
00:21:38,720 --> 00:21:41,240
circle of women, women friends right to turn
564
00:21:41,240 --> 00:21:43,880
to, to be like, okay, that is a whole that's
565
00:21:43,920 --> 00:21:45,880
like my public facing persona.
566
00:21:45,920 --> 00:21:48,480
And but but here is, here is what matters to
567
00:21:48,480 --> 00:21:48,840
me.
568
00:21:49,120 --> 00:21:51,840
Jen Mueller:
Exactly. Yeah, exactly.
569
00:21:51,880 --> 00:21:52,360
Yeah.
570
00:21:52,630 --> 00:21:54,270
Carol Cox:
Well, Jen, let's talk about,
571
00:21:54,430 --> 00:21:56,630
uh, situations that didn't necessarily go the
572
00:21:56,630 --> 00:21:58,510
way that you wanted. I know I have had my
573
00:21:58,510 --> 00:21:59,710
share of those. I like to say,
574
00:21:59,710 --> 00:22:00,950
if you put in enough reps,
575
00:22:00,950 --> 00:22:03,110
you're gonna have those times where things
576
00:22:03,110 --> 00:22:05,070
are just like, no, I didn't that didn't go
577
00:22:05,110 --> 00:22:06,630
the way that I wanted. Do you have anything
578
00:22:06,630 --> 00:22:07,630
that comes to mind?
579
00:22:07,990 --> 00:22:10,150
Jen Mueller:
Oh, I have a handful of things,
580
00:22:10,150 --> 00:22:13,910
but I'll tell you my job for 19 years on the
581
00:22:13,910 --> 00:22:16,430
Mariners broadcast was to do the walk off
582
00:22:16,430 --> 00:22:18,190
interviews after wins.
583
00:22:18,190 --> 00:22:19,790
And some of them are, I'm going to say,
584
00:22:19,830 --> 00:22:20,950
uneventful, right?
585
00:22:20,990 --> 00:22:22,670
The game was already decided in like the
586
00:22:22,670 --> 00:22:23,830
sixth or seventh inning,
587
00:22:23,830 --> 00:22:25,710
so there's no real drama at the end of the
588
00:22:25,710 --> 00:22:29,550
game. Those generally go according to plan.
589
00:22:30,270 --> 00:22:33,390
It's the ones where it truly is a walk off.
590
00:22:33,430 --> 00:22:36,030
Like they hit the game winning home run in
591
00:22:36,030 --> 00:22:37,230
the bottom of the ninth.
592
00:22:37,430 --> 00:22:39,630
Because now here's what's going to happen.
593
00:22:39,630 --> 00:22:41,270
I will be in the middle of some sort of
594
00:22:41,270 --> 00:22:44,870
celebration, and it probably includes a very
595
00:22:44,870 --> 00:22:47,630
cold bucket of ice water or Gatorade.
596
00:22:47,910 --> 00:22:50,630
And so while I am trying to dodge Gatorade,
597
00:22:50,630 --> 00:22:53,010
I'm trying to ask questions and keep it a
598
00:22:53,010 --> 00:22:55,730
secret and tune out all of the noise that's
599
00:22:55,730 --> 00:22:57,530
happening in the stadium while looking at the
600
00:22:57,530 --> 00:22:58,610
television camera.
601
00:22:58,770 --> 00:23:00,730
And while I dodged most of them,
602
00:23:00,730 --> 00:23:03,650
I did get squarely hit with a few buckets of
603
00:23:03,690 --> 00:23:06,650
Gatorade. And I don't care how much you
604
00:23:06,650 --> 00:23:09,330
prepare for that interview, it is so cold.
605
00:23:09,530 --> 00:23:11,530
And quite honestly, the very first thing I'm
606
00:23:11,530 --> 00:23:13,410
thinking when it happens is what does my hair
607
00:23:13,450 --> 00:23:15,690
look like? And is my makeup running down my
608
00:23:15,690 --> 00:23:18,170
face? Right. So now I'm totally distracted.
609
00:23:18,770 --> 00:23:21,610
But in those moments, you're still on TV.
610
00:23:21,650 --> 00:23:23,690
It is still being broadcast in front of
611
00:23:23,730 --> 00:23:26,290
thousands of people in the stadium at that
612
00:23:26,290 --> 00:23:29,090
moment. And so you've got to regroup really
613
00:23:29,090 --> 00:23:31,130
quick. Finish that up and make sure that the
614
00:23:31,130 --> 00:23:32,930
focus stays on the athlete that you're
615
00:23:32,930 --> 00:23:35,770
talking to. The thing that I have learned is
616
00:23:35,770 --> 00:23:39,730
to practice for distractions and to state the
617
00:23:39,730 --> 00:23:42,010
obvious about whatever is happening.
618
00:23:42,330 --> 00:23:45,010
So the bucket of Gatorade is really cold.
619
00:23:45,010 --> 00:23:46,610
It will take your breath away,
620
00:23:46,610 --> 00:23:48,810
and it will cause you to forget everything
621
00:23:48,810 --> 00:23:50,050
that you were about to say.
622
00:23:50,530 --> 00:23:53,030
I'm not going to pretend like it's not the
623
00:23:53,030 --> 00:23:54,270
case, right?
624
00:23:54,310 --> 00:23:56,230
I will say when I need to regroup.
625
00:23:56,670 --> 00:23:58,430
Wow, that was cold.
626
00:23:58,630 --> 00:24:00,950
Wow. Let's get back on track with this.
627
00:24:00,950 --> 00:24:03,150
I'm just buying myself a little bit of time
628
00:24:03,150 --> 00:24:05,430
to call my heart rate and to get back to it,
629
00:24:05,430 --> 00:24:07,150
but everybody just saw it,
630
00:24:07,150 --> 00:24:08,950
so I'm not afraid of acknowledging it.
631
00:24:08,950 --> 00:24:11,110
And we shouldn't be afraid of acknowledging
632
00:24:11,110 --> 00:24:13,470
when something doesn't go according to plan
633
00:24:13,790 --> 00:24:16,470
in a conversation or an interview or a
634
00:24:16,470 --> 00:24:19,310
presentation, it makes you human.
635
00:24:19,310 --> 00:24:21,070
It level sets everything,
636
00:24:21,070 --> 00:24:23,990
and it gives you a chance to calm down and to
637
00:24:24,030 --> 00:24:26,430
reset from wherever you want to start.
638
00:24:27,070 --> 00:24:28,590
Carol Cox:
Yeah, that's really helpful.
639
00:24:28,670 --> 00:24:30,790
Just. Yeah. And acknowledging,
640
00:24:30,830 --> 00:24:32,630
like you said, everyone could see it.
641
00:24:32,670 --> 00:24:35,430
It's not it's not something that you can just
642
00:24:35,430 --> 00:24:36,630
pretend didn't happen.
643
00:24:36,630 --> 00:24:38,430
And so like kind of acknowledge it also just
644
00:24:38,470 --> 00:24:40,550
kind of gets it off of their mind too,
645
00:24:40,590 --> 00:24:42,670
because you've closed the loop, so to speak,
646
00:24:42,910 --> 00:24:44,630
in their mind. And then you can go on.
647
00:24:44,950 --> 00:24:46,390
I remember that, you know,
648
00:24:46,430 --> 00:24:48,670
I've done lots of live TV and unlike you,
649
00:24:48,670 --> 00:24:50,790
I'm the one answering the questions from the
650
00:24:50,790 --> 00:24:53,130
reporter. So obviously we have the topics
651
00:24:53,130 --> 00:24:54,650
that are probably going to be for that
652
00:24:54,650 --> 00:24:56,370
segment and the segments are short,
653
00:24:56,410 --> 00:24:57,770
you know, 3 or 4 minutes,
654
00:24:58,010 --> 00:25:00,490
right, with myself, the reporter and the
655
00:25:00,490 --> 00:25:01,650
other political analysts.
656
00:25:01,650 --> 00:25:03,330
So there's three of us. So it's like boom,
657
00:25:03,330 --> 00:25:04,770
boom, boom, right. Question,
658
00:25:04,770 --> 00:25:05,850
short answer, you know,
659
00:25:05,890 --> 00:25:07,010
next person, etc..
660
00:25:07,410 --> 00:25:08,930
So I'll have my prepared notes,
661
00:25:08,970 --> 00:25:10,810
just like you do on the sidelines of what
662
00:25:10,810 --> 00:25:12,250
we're going to talk about, and some different
663
00:25:12,250 --> 00:25:14,050
things that I've thought about in advance.
664
00:25:14,330 --> 00:25:16,890
And I remember it was so again,
665
00:25:16,930 --> 00:25:18,850
lots of live TV and I'm good at thinking on
666
00:25:18,850 --> 00:25:22,410
my feet. And this was again,
667
00:25:22,410 --> 00:25:25,170
election night. 2016 was not going the way
668
00:25:25,370 --> 00:25:28,050
that I had hoped and we were taped.
669
00:25:28,090 --> 00:25:30,490
Luckily we were taping for the next morning,
670
00:25:30,490 --> 00:25:32,370
so it was like 1130 at night.
671
00:25:32,370 --> 00:25:34,130
Close to midnight. We were getting ready to
672
00:25:34,170 --> 00:25:36,210
wrap because we had just done the 11:00 news
673
00:25:36,250 --> 00:25:38,450
hour and the.
674
00:25:38,690 --> 00:25:40,170
So we were taping the segment,
675
00:25:40,210 --> 00:25:42,090
not live, and the reporter asked me a
676
00:25:42,090 --> 00:25:43,410
question and I literally,
677
00:25:43,410 --> 00:25:46,370
I think I was in a state of shock and I took
678
00:25:46,370 --> 00:25:49,090
me like 10s to answer,
679
00:25:49,090 --> 00:25:51,010
which would never happen on live TV.
680
00:25:51,150 --> 00:25:53,390
My brain probably knew we were taping for the
681
00:25:53,390 --> 00:25:55,430
next morning because I probably would have
682
00:25:55,430 --> 00:25:56,550
answered anyways.
683
00:25:56,550 --> 00:25:58,430
But I remember I just kind of sat there and
684
00:25:58,430 --> 00:25:59,990
for the first time there were zero.
685
00:26:00,030 --> 00:26:02,230
Like no words would kind of come out of my
686
00:26:02,230 --> 00:26:03,950
mouth. And then finally I just,
687
00:26:03,950 --> 00:26:06,150
like, took a deep breath and I answered,
688
00:26:06,190 --> 00:26:08,110
of course they cut it, you know, they slice
689
00:26:08,110 --> 00:26:09,950
it up for the next morning,
690
00:26:09,950 --> 00:26:12,830
but that has stuck with me so much because I
691
00:26:12,830 --> 00:26:15,630
feel like no matter how experienced you are,
692
00:26:15,630 --> 00:26:17,790
no matter how many years I have done this,
693
00:26:17,790 --> 00:26:19,230
no matter how prepared I was,
694
00:26:19,510 --> 00:26:21,430
sometimes like physically,
695
00:26:21,430 --> 00:26:24,390
like your body physiologically is doing
696
00:26:24,390 --> 00:26:26,910
something that you can't necessarily control.
697
00:26:26,910 --> 00:26:29,430
It's human. Like, I was having a real human
698
00:26:29,430 --> 00:26:32,750
moment and instead of beating myself up for
699
00:26:32,750 --> 00:26:34,670
it, which I do not, I give myself a lot of
700
00:26:34,670 --> 00:26:36,510
grace. And I think that's important for us to
701
00:26:36,550 --> 00:26:38,790
remember, too, that we're not always going to
702
00:26:38,790 --> 00:26:41,990
be perfect and to give ourselves grace when
703
00:26:42,030 --> 00:26:44,030
things don't go the way that we would want
704
00:26:44,030 --> 00:26:44,630
them to.
705
00:26:45,230 --> 00:26:47,510
Jen Mueller:
You want to know the most brilliant thing in
706
00:26:47,510 --> 00:26:48,870
TV? You already know this,
707
00:26:48,870 --> 00:26:50,510
but I'm going to share it with the audience.
708
00:26:50,850 --> 00:26:54,050
The most brilliant part of TV is that there's
709
00:26:54,050 --> 00:26:55,370
always another broadcast.
710
00:26:56,130 --> 00:26:59,010
And so we joke about it all the time.
711
00:26:59,010 --> 00:27:01,530
The worst is if you have that moment and then
712
00:27:01,530 --> 00:27:03,330
you're not on TV for two weeks because you
713
00:27:03,330 --> 00:27:04,650
went on vacation. Right.
714
00:27:04,890 --> 00:27:07,890
The best part is you have a chance to go back
715
00:27:07,890 --> 00:27:09,830
and do it again, probably in another 30
716
00:27:09,830 --> 00:27:11,690
minutes. Right. 30 minutes or 2 hours.
717
00:27:11,690 --> 00:27:14,410
And so I hate to say it's like getting back
718
00:27:14,410 --> 00:27:16,650
on the horse, but it really is important to
719
00:27:16,690 --> 00:27:18,730
go back out there and have that interaction.
720
00:27:19,130 --> 00:27:21,970
And that's another one of those things where
721
00:27:21,970 --> 00:27:24,570
I would just say, oh my gosh,
722
00:27:24,610 --> 00:27:26,330
my brain went totally blank.
723
00:27:26,370 --> 00:27:28,490
We've been talking about this all day.
724
00:27:28,490 --> 00:27:30,450
Just buying myself a little bit of time.
725
00:27:30,490 --> 00:27:32,930
Right. I have lost my train of thought during
726
00:27:32,930 --> 00:27:36,210
an interview. I have had producers talk in my
727
00:27:36,210 --> 00:27:38,570
ear while I'm doing an interview so that I
728
00:27:38,610 --> 00:27:40,210
can't hear the person that I'm actually
729
00:27:40,210 --> 00:27:44,090
talking to, and then I'm stuck because they
730
00:27:44,210 --> 00:27:46,090
finish their answer and I don't know what
731
00:27:46,090 --> 00:27:47,450
they just said, right?
732
00:27:47,650 --> 00:27:49,970
And I have little phrases that I can get out
733
00:27:49,970 --> 00:27:52,910
of that To say I was so caught up in that
734
00:27:52,910 --> 00:27:56,110
answer I almost forgot my next question.
735
00:27:56,470 --> 00:27:58,510
Now the the truth is, I did forget the next
736
00:27:58,510 --> 00:27:59,710
question. I have no idea what they said,
737
00:27:59,710 --> 00:28:02,150
right? But I've got the little ways to pivot
738
00:28:02,190 --> 00:28:04,030
out of that, which once again,
739
00:28:04,070 --> 00:28:07,110
it's level setting and stating the obvious.
740
00:28:07,310 --> 00:28:10,070
I have also literally tripped into athletes
741
00:28:10,070 --> 00:28:12,030
trying to introduce myself while they were
742
00:28:12,030 --> 00:28:14,390
getting dressed. Those are moments I don't
743
00:28:14,390 --> 00:28:16,750
forget. And you can't pretend like it didn't
744
00:28:16,750 --> 00:28:18,990
happen because everybody just watched this
745
00:28:18,990 --> 00:28:21,550
happen, right? Talk about a human moment
746
00:28:21,550 --> 00:28:23,390
where your face goes bright red and you're
747
00:28:23,390 --> 00:28:25,390
just like, okay, you know what I'm going to
748
00:28:25,390 --> 00:28:26,670
do? Try this again tomorrow.
749
00:28:26,870 --> 00:28:27,350
Um.
750
00:28:27,830 --> 00:28:29,390
Speaker3:
Well, hopefully they'll say they'll say hi to
751
00:28:29,390 --> 00:28:29,830
you because.
752
00:28:29,830 --> 00:28:30,750
Carol Cox:
They remember you.
753
00:28:30,870 --> 00:28:32,990
Jen Mueller:
Yeah, well, I did make quite the impression.
754
00:28:33,390 --> 00:28:35,350
I did, I did make quite the impression.
755
00:28:35,390 --> 00:28:35,870
Yeah.
756
00:28:35,910 --> 00:28:37,270
Speaker3:
Mhm. Um, so.
757
00:28:37,270 --> 00:28:39,030
Carol Cox:
Jen talk to us about your company.
758
00:28:39,070 --> 00:28:40,470
Talk sporty to me.
759
00:28:40,510 --> 00:28:42,390
What do you do and who do you work with.
760
00:28:42,830 --> 00:28:45,550
Jen Mueller:
So I do a lot of keynotes and I do a lot of
761
00:28:45,550 --> 00:28:47,950
content around effective communication.
762
00:28:47,950 --> 00:28:49,830
It's just like the conversation we've been
763
00:28:50,050 --> 00:28:52,530
having today, pulling back the curtain on
764
00:28:52,530 --> 00:28:56,010
some of these conversations to really dissect
765
00:28:56,050 --> 00:28:57,290
how did we get there?
766
00:28:57,290 --> 00:28:59,730
How do we make the most of really short
767
00:28:59,730 --> 00:29:00,850
interactions?
768
00:29:00,850 --> 00:29:02,530
How do we make sure that we're not just
769
00:29:02,570 --> 00:29:04,690
asking for more communication?
770
00:29:04,690 --> 00:29:07,690
We actually are giving the people around us,
771
00:29:07,690 --> 00:29:09,410
whether it's our team at work, our team on
772
00:29:09,410 --> 00:29:12,890
the field, what they need to be successful.
773
00:29:12,890 --> 00:29:15,010
So I work with a lot of clients that are in
774
00:29:15,050 --> 00:29:17,210
the financial space, um,
775
00:29:17,250 --> 00:29:20,490
folks who need some additional tools around
776
00:29:20,490 --> 00:29:22,450
those soft skills, right?
777
00:29:22,490 --> 00:29:23,970
They've got the numbers down, but a little
778
00:29:24,010 --> 00:29:25,210
bit of soft skills and,
779
00:29:25,370 --> 00:29:28,250
um, inspiring some audiences to believe that
780
00:29:28,250 --> 00:29:30,050
they've already got the answers.
781
00:29:30,090 --> 00:29:32,250
They just they just need to elevate
782
00:29:32,250 --> 00:29:33,850
themselves just a little bit.
783
00:29:34,770 --> 00:29:37,050
Carol Cox:
Well, what is what is something that
784
00:29:37,050 --> 00:29:39,130
listeners can start doing today,
785
00:29:39,370 --> 00:29:41,810
a habit or a strategy that they can
786
00:29:41,810 --> 00:29:44,330
incorporate into what they're doing to help
787
00:29:44,330 --> 00:29:47,170
them build this idea of confidence when
788
00:29:47,170 --> 00:29:49,250
they're in high pressure situations.
789
00:29:50,040 --> 00:29:51,880
Jen Mueller:
Well, I would say a couple of things.
790
00:29:51,880 --> 00:29:55,160
Number one, you could turn every situation
791
00:29:55,160 --> 00:29:57,240
into your version of high pressure.
792
00:29:57,240 --> 00:29:58,880
So here's what I mean.
793
00:29:58,880 --> 00:30:00,920
You know that people are going to ask you the
794
00:30:00,920 --> 00:30:02,760
question, how are you.
795
00:30:03,040 --> 00:30:04,720
Multiple times a day, right.
796
00:30:04,760 --> 00:30:06,960
Hey, how are you? How's it going today?
797
00:30:07,360 --> 00:30:10,680
And we would generally answer with the same
798
00:30:10,720 --> 00:30:12,320
script, whatever that is.
799
00:30:12,360 --> 00:30:13,680
I'm good. How are you?
800
00:30:13,720 --> 00:30:17,200
I'm good. Instead of delivering that same
801
00:30:17,200 --> 00:30:20,520
line, deliver what I would call a success
802
00:30:20,520 --> 00:30:23,520
statement, which changes that conversation.
803
00:30:23,520 --> 00:30:25,880
It makes you vulnerable in the moment.
804
00:30:25,880 --> 00:30:28,680
And it's going to create that,
805
00:30:29,240 --> 00:30:32,840
that, um, a little bit more high stakes
806
00:30:32,840 --> 00:30:35,040
because the person you're talking to was not
807
00:30:35,040 --> 00:30:36,640
expecting that answer either.
808
00:30:36,640 --> 00:30:39,400
And so now you get to practice in a real low
809
00:30:39,440 --> 00:30:42,520
stakes moment, the same exact emotions that
810
00:30:42,520 --> 00:30:45,480
you would feel in some of those more crucial,
811
00:30:45,480 --> 00:30:47,240
crucial and critical conversations.
812
00:30:47,240 --> 00:30:48,280
Does that make sense?
813
00:30:48,320 --> 00:30:50,220
Carol Cox:
Yes, yes. Like taking these daily
814
00:30:50,220 --> 00:30:52,020
opportunities to practice?
815
00:30:52,220 --> 00:30:54,860
Jen Mueller:
Yes. So you would say something like I'm
816
00:30:54,900 --> 00:30:58,100
fantastic. I loved this podcast episode that
817
00:30:58,100 --> 00:31:00,100
I got a chance to talk to today.
818
00:31:00,300 --> 00:31:02,220
Right. I answered the question.
819
00:31:02,220 --> 00:31:03,860
I gave my success.
820
00:31:03,900 --> 00:31:05,060
I love this podcast.
821
00:31:05,060 --> 00:31:08,220
I just opened the door for a different
822
00:31:08,220 --> 00:31:09,460
conversation.
823
00:31:09,780 --> 00:31:11,700
I get to guide that conversation,
824
00:31:11,700 --> 00:31:13,620
but I also get to practice some of these
825
00:31:13,620 --> 00:31:15,500
skills because I don't know where the
826
00:31:15,500 --> 00:31:16,980
conversation is going to go.
827
00:31:17,140 --> 00:31:19,020
So use these little moments.
828
00:31:19,020 --> 00:31:20,660
By the way, you're also advocating for
829
00:31:20,660 --> 00:31:21,900
yourself when you do that,
830
00:31:21,900 --> 00:31:25,180
but use the little moments to start building
831
00:31:25,180 --> 00:31:28,220
up the skills and the confidence to use them
832
00:31:28,220 --> 00:31:29,380
in bigger moments.
833
00:31:29,860 --> 00:31:31,380
Carol Cox:
Oh, I like that. Jen.
834
00:31:31,380 --> 00:31:32,780
Where is the best place for listeners to
835
00:31:32,820 --> 00:31:33,660
connect with you?
836
00:31:34,460 --> 00:31:37,300
Jen Mueller:
I would say LinkedIn and Instagram.
837
00:31:37,300 --> 00:31:40,220
You can find me on Talk Sporty to me if you
838
00:31:40,220 --> 00:31:42,500
like the videos, Talk Sporty to me on
839
00:31:42,500 --> 00:31:45,220
YouTube. That is the website I will also
840
00:31:45,220 --> 00:31:47,380
throw out if you are a sports fan and like
841
00:31:47,380 --> 00:31:50,040
cooking, I have an entire show where I cook
842
00:31:50,040 --> 00:31:51,480
with athletes called I cook,
843
00:31:51,520 --> 00:31:53,760
You Measure, and that's a really fun way to
844
00:31:53,800 --> 00:31:56,840
just engage on a different level in all of
845
00:31:56,840 --> 00:31:58,200
those conversations.
846
00:31:58,440 --> 00:32:00,000
Carol Cox:
Oh that's fun. This is on YouTube.
847
00:32:00,200 --> 00:32:01,560
Jen Mueller:
It is on YouTube. Yep.
848
00:32:01,600 --> 00:32:03,000
Carol Cox:
Well, tell us some of the things that you've
849
00:32:03,000 --> 00:32:03,480
cooked.
850
00:32:04,600 --> 00:32:07,560
Jen Mueller:
We have cooked any number of things from like
851
00:32:07,840 --> 00:32:12,680
a taco, turkey mac to steak with chimichurri
852
00:32:12,800 --> 00:32:14,800
to chorizo with eggs.
853
00:32:15,000 --> 00:32:17,640
But the crazy part is figuring out what their
854
00:32:17,640 --> 00:32:19,480
comfort and skill level is in the kitchen.
855
00:32:19,480 --> 00:32:21,320
So you talk about vulnerability.
856
00:32:21,960 --> 00:32:23,960
Tell you what, these guys are admitting that
857
00:32:23,960 --> 00:32:25,720
they don't know how to use a can opener or a
858
00:32:25,720 --> 00:32:28,400
knife. I think that takes a little bit more,
859
00:32:28,600 --> 00:32:32,720
um, confidence and vulnerability than you
860
00:32:32,720 --> 00:32:34,960
might imagine, but it also creates some
861
00:32:34,960 --> 00:32:37,040
really fun and funny moments in the kitchen.
862
00:32:37,360 --> 00:32:38,480
Carol Cox:
Oh, that is fun. All right.
863
00:32:38,480 --> 00:32:40,280
I'll make sure to put all of these links in
864
00:32:40,280 --> 00:32:42,960
the show notes so that listeners can find you
865
00:32:42,960 --> 00:32:45,040
on YouTube and LinkedIn and Instagram and
866
00:32:45,040 --> 00:32:46,960
your website. Jen, thank you so much for
867
00:32:46,960 --> 00:32:48,900
coming on the podcast. I really enjoyed this
868
00:32:48,900 --> 00:32:49,900
conversation.
869
00:32:49,940 --> 00:32:51,220
Jen Mueller:
Yeah, it's been really fun.
870
00:32:51,220 --> 00:32:52,220
Carol, thanks.
871
00:32:52,660 --> 00:32:54,780
Carol Cox:
If this conversation got you thinking about
872
00:32:54,780 --> 00:32:56,820
how you show up when it matters most,
873
00:32:56,820 --> 00:32:58,220
whether it's on stage,
874
00:32:58,420 --> 00:33:00,260
in a meeting, on camera,
875
00:33:00,300 --> 00:33:01,620
even on a zoom webinar,
876
00:33:01,780 --> 00:33:04,500
and you want to elevate both your content and
877
00:33:04,500 --> 00:33:07,700
your delivery. Join us at our next one day
878
00:33:07,820 --> 00:33:11,540
in-person Speaking Accelerator workshop in
879
00:33:11,540 --> 00:33:12,780
Orlando, Florida.
880
00:33:12,780 --> 00:33:14,300
We have so much fun!
881
00:33:14,340 --> 00:33:16,700
You create your signature talk and you get to
882
00:33:16,740 --> 00:33:19,620
practice delivering it all on the same day.
883
00:33:19,620 --> 00:33:21,620
That's why we call it an accelerator.
884
00:33:21,700 --> 00:33:24,020
You can get all the details at speaking your
885
00:33:24,020 --> 00:33:27,860
brand.com. Again, that's speaking your brand.
886
00:33:30,420 --> 00:33:31,900
If you enjoyed this episode,
887
00:33:31,940 --> 00:33:34,180
be sure to follow the Speaking Your Podcast
888
00:33:34,180 --> 00:33:36,780
and your favorite podcast app and share it
889
00:33:36,780 --> 00:33:38,940
with a friend. Until next time,
890
00:33:38,940 --> 00:33:40,020
thanks for listening.