00:00:00.239 --> 00:00:03.359
Over the past year, we've explored awareness.
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We've turned on the light, we've talked about the witness, survival patterns, field and form, alignment, and most recently, the architecture of trust.
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And this week, something special happened.
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Pre-orders officially opened for Align Your Life.
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The book itself launches on October 7th.
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And I've been thinking about something that might sound a little strange, coming from an author who would very much like you to pre-order her book.
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A book will not change your life.
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Neither will this podcast.
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Neither will the next workshop.
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Neither will the next breakthrough.
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And awareness alone won't change your life either.
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Practice does.
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Embodiment does.
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Choice does.
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A book can turn on the light.
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It can help you see the furniture.
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It can give you language for something you've felt for years but haven't been able to really name.
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It can show you a door you didn't realize was there.
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But eventually, you have to walk through it.
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And maybe there's something beautifully appropriate about being in this space between pre-order and launch.
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The work exists.
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The intention has been set, but we haven't arrived yet.
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We're in the middle.
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And isn't that where transformation actually happens?
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Between awareness and embodiment.
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Between intention and expression.
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Between who we've been and who we're practicing becoming.
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So today isn't really about a book.
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It's about what happens after we've seen something we can no longer unsee.
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Because now, the real work begins.
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Hello, hello, and welcome to the Aligned Human Project.
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I'm your host, Don Elgin.
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If you've ever looked around at your life that appears successful on the outside but feels disconnected on the inside, you are in the right place.
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If you've ever wondered why you keep repeating the same patterns, carrying the same emotional weight, or chasing goals that never quite bring you the peace you hope they would, you are in the right place.
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This podcast is about remembering who you were before the world told you who you needed to be.
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Together we'll explore the intersection of neuroscience, psychology, ancient wisdom, quantum science, and practical spiritualism to understand how awareness shapes our field and how our field shapes our lives, and why lasting change begins from the inside out.
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We'll talk about leadership, relationships, health, purpose, emotional well-being, and conscious creation, not as separate parts of life, but as reflections of one thing: our level of alignment.
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Because most people don't need another strategy, they need a new relationship with themselves.
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So whether you're leading a business, a family, a team, or simply trying to lead yourself with greater intention, welcome.
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Take a breath, become the witness, and let's begin.
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Hello, hello, my friends, and welcome back to the Aligned Human Project.
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This week's episode feels deeply personal.
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On Wednesday, pre-orders officially opened for Align Your Life.
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And after years of writing and rewriting, studying, questioning, living these ideas, changing my mind about some of them and deepening others, we are now just less than two weeks away from the official launch on October 7th.
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It is surreal.
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But this moment has also made me think about why I wrote the book in the first place.
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Because when I was writing Align Your Life, I kept coming back to one question.
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Not what do I want people to know when they finish this book?
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But instead, what do I hope becomes different in the way people live?
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See, those are very different questions.
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And I'm not particularly interested in collecting spiritual ideas.
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And I say that as someone who spent years doing exactly that: consciousness, energy, beliefs, the nervous system, trauma, prayer, forgiveness, gratitude, presence.
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Wonderful.
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But can I live any of it when someone pisses me off?
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That's a different question.
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Can I remember it when I'm scared?
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When somebody rejects me, when a plan falls apart, when I feel misunderstood, when my nervous system goes into survival.
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Because knowing that presence matters isn't presence.
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Knowing that forgiveness matters isn't forgiveness.
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Knowing I have a choice isn't choosing.
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That's where spirituality becomes practical.
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And that's where awareness becomes alignment.
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I don't want someone to finish align your life and think, wow, interesting book.
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I mean, I'll take it, don't get me wrong.
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But that is not why I wrote it.
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I want you to catch yourself halfway into an old realization and suddenly realize, wait, I have another choice.
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I want you to hear yourself telling the same old story you've told for 20 years and ask, wait, is that actually true?
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I want you to walk into a difficult conversation and notice the version of you who normally enters the room and intentionally choose who enters instead.
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That's where life changes.
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Not because we suddenly know more, because what we know begins changing how we live.
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This is the distinction we've been building all quarter.
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Awareness reveals, alignment participates, and creation is what begins expressing through those repeated choices.
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Awareness without embodiment can very easily become another form of entertainment.
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We consume it.
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We agree with it.
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We highlight half the damn book.
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And yes, I actually do that.
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We send the quote to our friend.
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This is so me.
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And then Tuesday morning comes and we live exactly the same way we lived Monday.
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Alignment asks something different.
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Alignment asks, now that you've seen it, what will you choose?
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Not forever, not for the rest of your life.
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Just right here.
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This choice, this conversation, this moment.
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Because this is what I have come to believe free will actually is, not some abstract philosophical concept.
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Free will is our capacity to intentionally choose our relationship with what is happening.
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And sovereignty is the practice of exercising that free will from the witness rather than automatically reacting from survival mind.
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That's alignment.
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Not knowing better, but choosing differently because awareness made another choice possible.
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See, there was a period in my life when I genuinely believed the next answer was going to be the answer.
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Another book, another teacher or healer, another course, certification, another modality, another breakthrough.
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And see, I wasn't casually dabbling.
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I was deeply, deeply curious and sincerely doing the work.
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I had learned a tremendous amount.
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And yet there were still places in my life, certain relationships, where I just kept repeating the same patterns.
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See, there's a difference between being able to explain yourself and actually being free.
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I could easily understand why I reacted a certain way and still react.
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I could understand a pattern and I would still participate in it.
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I would know that I needed a certain boundary and I'd still abandon myself.
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I could intellectually understand forgiveness and still carry the violin cabinet and talk about presence and still leave myself seconds after becoming activated.
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See, there's nothing wrong with information.
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Information itself has done the job.
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It turned on the light, it gave me awareness.
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You see, the missing piece though was that I was waiting for awareness to do the work that only choice could do.
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There is an old quote or parable, and I don't know where it comes from.
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And it goes, knowledge is rumor until it is embodied.
00:10:06.080 --> 00:10:10.559
And I'm going to say that to you again because I want you to just take a moment and absorb that.
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Awareness is rumor until it is embodied.
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Think about this.
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I can know lots of things and I'm up here in my mind.
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But until I can bring it down into a felt and lived experience, we're always going to have a disconnection.
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See, I was constantly being told, you know it up here, but bring it down here.
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But I don't understand that.
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But awareness, its job is to reveal a pattern.
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But awareness doesn't automatically change the pattern.
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You have to meet the pattern differently.
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And then again, and then again, and then again, and sometimes badly, sometimes after you've already reacted.
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Sometimes you only realize it three hours later.
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But at least now you saw it.
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Maybe the next time it's only 20 minutes and five minutes.
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That's what happened for me.
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And then eventually I caught it while it was happening.
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And then eventually I caught it while it was coming.
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But see, that's the practice.
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That's the difference of creating a lived experience.
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A great example of this was my relationship with my mother.
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He used to just react.
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She would say something, do something, and I would just snap.
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And then eventually I began to prepare myself for the conversations so that I would create an out for myself before I became activated.
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This is what we would call medium-hanging fruit.
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Low-hanging fruit would be like driving, but now we're going into something that's pretty activating.
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And I would learn how to actually prep for these things, to prepare myself to be able to get out.
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I learned how to pause, to take a breath and settle into my body and get present and just notice what was hooking me.
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And then I would get off the call before I freaked out.
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I stopped waiting for the trigger to become the place where I learned alignment and I started to practice beforehand.
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See, I didn't need another answer.
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I needed to practice living the answers that I already had.
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Sometimes this becomes what is often referred to as horizontal learning.
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We keep learning new tools, but we're really embodying it.
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And this is where the science becomes incredibly hopeful.
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Because one of the remarkable things about the human brain is that it remains capable of change throughout our lives.
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Repeated experiences strengthen neuropathways.
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The thoughts we rehearse, the emotional responses we repeatedly enter, and the behaviors we consistently practice can become increasingly efficient and familiar, which helps explain why our survival responses can feel so automatic.
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You don't wake up in the morning and consciously decide, today I think all people please.
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Can you imagine?
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You don't consciously decide to be a defensive person, or to withdraw, or over-explain, or even to control.
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Those responses happen often because they've been rehearsed thousands of times.
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They're familiar.
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They are efficient and they are available.
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But here's the beautiful part.
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The same principle that helped create an old pattern can help us practice a new one.
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Every time we interrupt the automatic response and consciously practice another one, we're giving the system a different experience.
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At first, it may feel clumsy, forced, maybe even unnatural.
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And sometimes people will interpret that feeling as this isn't really me.
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But of course it feels unfamiliar.
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You've practiced the other response for 30 years.
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Familiar isn't the same as authentic.
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Sometimes familiar is simply practiced.
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And that's why repetition matters so much.
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An insight may open a new possibility, but repetition helps stabilize it.
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Eventually, what once required enormous conscious effort becomes increasingly available.
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Presence becomes more familiar.
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Curiosity becomes more familiar.
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Compassion becomes more familiar.
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Even a boundary can become more familiar.
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Telling the truth to yourself can become more familiar.
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Returning to yourself.
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That's embodiment.
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Not because survival never appears again, I wish.
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But because alignment became another well-practiced path back home.
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Imagine sitting down at a piano for the very first time.
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You know where the keys are.
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Someone has explained how music works.
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Maybe you've even read an entire book about playing the piano.
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You understand scales, chords, rhythm.
00:15:53.039 --> 00:15:54.000
Wonderful.
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Now play.
00:15:59.039 --> 00:16:03.679
Your fingers don't know what your mind knows.
00:16:04.320 --> 00:16:07.840
At first, every movement requires attention.
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What does this finger do?
00:16:10.080 --> 00:16:11.919
Which note comes next?
00:16:12.159 --> 00:16:13.840
The music is slow.
00:16:14.080 --> 00:16:18.000
It is awkward, sometimes very frustrating.
00:16:18.240 --> 00:16:25.600
Nobody sits down after one lesson and says, apparently, the piano isn't aligned for me.
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We understand that music requires practice.
00:16:31.120 --> 00:16:38.559
Yet somehow, when it comes to our inner lives, we expect one breakthrough to permanently transform us.
00:16:38.960 --> 00:16:46.720
One therapy session, one meditation, one book, one profound spiritual experience.
00:16:47.200 --> 00:16:52.879
And when the old reaction comes back, we think, I thought I healed this.
00:16:53.440 --> 00:16:54.559
Maybe you did.
00:16:54.799 --> 00:16:58.320
And maybe now you're learning to play it differently.
00:16:59.200 --> 00:17:01.519
Presence has to be practiced.
00:17:01.919 --> 00:17:06.400
Compassion has to be practiced, especially when it's with yourself.
00:17:06.720 --> 00:17:08.799
Trust has to be practiced.
00:17:09.279 --> 00:17:12.240
Boundaries definitely need to be practiced.
00:17:12.640 --> 00:17:14.480
Alignment has to be practiced.
00:17:14.720 --> 00:17:18.079
One ordinary moment at a time.
00:17:18.640 --> 00:17:22.000
And eventually something remarkable happens.
00:17:22.319 --> 00:17:24.960
The musician stops thinking about every note.
00:17:25.359 --> 00:17:28.960
The music becomes something that moves through them.
00:17:29.279 --> 00:17:30.960
That's embodiment.
00:17:31.279 --> 00:17:38.720
Not because they understood the music, because they practiced it until the whole system knew how to play.
00:17:38.960 --> 00:17:43.359
Awareness opens the door, and practice walks through it.
00:17:43.759 --> 00:17:50.160
Repetition creates familiarity, and familiarity becomes embodiment.
00:17:50.799 --> 00:17:53.359
Embodiment changes what we create.
00:17:53.680 --> 00:17:57.119
This is why I don't think life is constantly testing us.
00:17:57.440 --> 00:17:59.759
You see, hear that language all the time.
00:18:00.000 --> 00:18:02.160
The universe is testing you.
00:18:02.480 --> 00:18:05.920
I don't believe that at all anymore.
00:18:06.160 --> 00:18:10.079
I think life is giving us somewhere to practice.
00:18:10.319 --> 00:18:13.920
The person who irritates you isn't necessarily a test.
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They're showing you something.
00:18:16.240 --> 00:18:20.880
The difficult conversation isn't proof that you're failing at alignment.
00:18:21.039 --> 00:18:24.559
It's somewhere to practice alignment.
00:18:24.960 --> 00:18:30.799
The boundary that makes your stomach turn isn't evidence that you're not ready.
00:18:31.119 --> 00:18:35.440
Maybe it's exactly where courage gets practiced.
00:18:35.680 --> 00:18:40.000
The uncertainty isn't something you have to eliminate before you trust.
00:18:40.160 --> 00:18:42.079
It's where trust gets lived.
00:18:42.480 --> 00:18:49.440
This changes everything because now I don't have to wait until I'm healed enough to live.
00:18:49.759 --> 00:18:52.960
Living is where embodiment happens.
00:18:53.200 --> 00:18:56.319
Every trigger becomes your classroom.
00:18:56.480 --> 00:18:59.759
Every difficult conversation becomes the rehearsal.
00:19:00.000 --> 00:19:05.279
Every unexpected disappointment becomes another opportunity to return.
00:19:05.599 --> 00:19:08.960
And compassion matters enormously here.
00:19:09.200 --> 00:19:17.839
Because if every time you catch an old pattern, you shame yourself, you've simply created another survival pattern around healing.
00:19:18.160 --> 00:19:19.680
This is not helpful.
00:19:20.240 --> 00:19:24.000
Curiosity gives us somewhere else to go.
00:19:24.319 --> 00:19:26.559
Oh, there it is.
00:19:26.880 --> 00:19:29.440
Isn't that interesting or fascinating?
00:19:29.839 --> 00:19:32.400
What meaning am I giving this?
00:19:32.960 --> 00:19:35.440
What belief is active?
00:19:35.920 --> 00:19:38.400
What is happening in my field?
00:19:38.640 --> 00:19:39.440
Thoughts am I having?
00:19:39.599 --> 00:19:40.799
Emotions am I having?
00:19:40.960 --> 00:19:43.440
What does my survival mind want to do?
00:19:44.079 --> 00:19:47.039
And who do I want to be?
00:19:47.839 --> 00:19:49.920
Now free will enters.
00:19:50.160 --> 00:19:52.880
Now alignment becomes possible.
00:19:53.440 --> 00:20:00.720
And this is where the five elements continue to give us such a compassionate way of understanding ourselves.
00:20:01.039 --> 00:20:06.240
Because returning to alignment doesn't look identical for everyone.
00:20:06.559 --> 00:20:11.599
See, wood may need to practice patience when life isn't moving fast enough.
00:20:12.000 --> 00:20:20.319
Not suppressing the frustration, witnessing it and feeling it, and practicing a different relationship with pace.
00:20:20.799 --> 00:20:25.599
Fire may need to practice remaining connected when the energy in the room changes.
00:20:26.559 --> 00:20:30.960
Immediately performing, entertaining, or trying to bring everybody back up.
00:20:31.759 --> 00:20:37.359
Earth may need to practice allowing other people to have their own experience.
00:20:37.920 --> 00:20:40.559
Caring without immediately caretaking.
00:20:40.880 --> 00:20:48.559
Metal may need to practice allowing imperfection, letting something unfold differently without deciding it's wrong.
00:20:48.799 --> 00:21:01.680
Where water may need to practice staying in connection when the instinct is to retreat, not forcing engagement, simply noticing when solitude has quietly become disappearance.
00:21:02.079 --> 00:21:04.799
None of these elements are a problem to fix.
00:21:05.039 --> 00:21:09.599
They're simply different places where life invites us to practice.
00:21:09.920 --> 00:21:17.359
The point isn't stop being wood or fire or earth or metal or water.
00:21:17.519 --> 00:21:20.960
They're all beautiful in they're all unique.
00:21:21.839 --> 00:21:29.039
The question is, how does this element express when I'm living from survival?
00:21:29.599 --> 00:21:36.079
And what becomes possible when I consciously practice its virtue instead?
00:21:36.559 --> 00:21:48.160
That's embodiment, not becoming someone else, becoming increasingly conscious in how we express who we already are.
00:21:49.119 --> 00:21:54.000
And this is just as true in leadership.
00:21:54.319 --> 00:21:58.400
Extraordinary cultures aren't created through one inspiring keynote.
00:21:58.799 --> 00:21:59.759
I say that as someone who.
00:22:00.079 --> 00:22:01.599
Who gives keynotes?
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They are not created by the annual retreat or the beautifully designed virtues or values on the wall.
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They're created Tuesday morning.
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An employee walks into your office and says, I made a mistake.
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There's the practice.
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Do you react?
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Do you shame?
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Do you immediately try to determine who's responsible?
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Or maybe even try to jump in and fix it?
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Can you stay curious enough long enough to understand what happened?
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Another person disagrees with you in a meeting.
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There's the practice.
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Someone gives you feedback you don't particularly enjoy hearing.
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There's the practice.
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That would be me.
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Culture is created through thousands of ordinary moments where leaders repeatedly teach people this is what happens in this room when reality arrives.
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That's why leadership isn't a performance, it's a practice.
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And every day gives us another opportunity to practice becoming the kind of person whose presence makes greater truth, trust, and alignment possible.
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So I'd like to leave you with something incredibly simple this week.
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Not another challenge, not another habit tracker, although I do love my trackers.
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Just a question.
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Tomorrow morning, before you get swept into everything you need to accomplish, ask, who do I want to practice being today?
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Not, what do I need to get done?
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Not what do I need to achieve?
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Those questions have their place.
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But before productivity, we want presence.
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Who do I want to practice being?
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Maybe today you practice curiosity.
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Maybe you practice courage or compassion, honesty, even if it's with yourself, practicing patience.
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Maybe today you practice not explaining your boundary seventeen different ways.
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Maybe you practice remaining present when someone is disappointed in you.
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Maybe you practice returning to yourself every time you've noticed you've drifted.
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Just choose one.
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Then live your day.
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And tonight don't ask, did I do it perfectly?
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Ask, did I remember?
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Did I remember to pause?
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Did I remember I had a choice?
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Did I remember that I'm the witness?
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Did I remember that awareness made another response possible?
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And if you forgot all day and remembered at 9.47 tonight, beautiful.
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You remembered tomorrow we practice again.
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That's how this works.
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Not through force, but through repetition, through compassion, through devotion, through beginning again and again.
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I'll give you personally my three questions that I ask in each moment.
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One, who do you want to be in this situation?
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Two, does this thought, emotion, behavior align with who you're choosing to be?
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And then three, what's the next best possible thought or behavior you can have?
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And I want you to shame yourself.
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You're gonna do the last two over and over again.
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So the key to the first question is that person is your future self.
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Who do you want to be?
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How do you want to handle these situations?
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Who do you want to be in this situation?
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Then we can ask the next two questions over and over until we get to a yes.
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Does this thought align with who you choose to be?
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Answer is no.
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What's the next best possible one?
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We do it again and again and again until we get to a, oh, yeah, that does align.
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Great.
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Move and go forward from there.
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Those three questions, write them on sticky notes, put them on your computer, put them on, you know, maybe your fridge, the mirror in the bathroom.
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Put them in your car.
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Those three questions, those will change your life.
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As I think about this journey we've been on together, I keep coming back to ordinary moments.
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Most of our lives aren't lived in the milestones.
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They're lived on Tuesday afternoons.
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They're lived in kitchens, in cars, in meetings.
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They're lived in text messages, grocery stores, uh, bedrooms.
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The five seconds after someone says something you don't like, most of those moments will never be photographed.
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Nobody will applaud.
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There won't be a certificate saying, congratulations, you chose alignment.
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Well, there might be if you're in my office.
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They'll simply come and then they'll go.
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But what if those are the moments where our lives are actually created?
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Not in the promotion, but the way you treat yourself after making a mistake.
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Not the wedding, the conversation in the kitchen 15 years later.
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Not the retreat, the way you respond when someone challenges you on a Tuesday morning.
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Not the breakthrough, but the next choice.
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Those are the moments where character is formed, where trust is cultivated, where relationships change, where the field changes, where alignment becomes embodied.
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Because that's where embodiment really is.
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It's when the person you've been practicing becoming begins showing up before you have to remind them.
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Not perfectly, not permanently, but increasingly natural because you've practiced returning often enough that alignment begins to feel like home.
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And before we finish today, I want to invite you into something incredibly meaningful for me.
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We are now less than two weeks away from the official launch on October 7th.
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But after everything we've just talked about, I want to be very clear about what I'm inviting you to purchase.
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Not an answer, not another thing to consume, not 12 laws to highlight and put on the shelf.
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I'm inviting you into a practice.
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Because the book can turn on the light.
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What you do once you see the room is entirely yours.
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The witness, the room, field and form, the 12 laws of co-creation, uh, the questions, the practices, the opportunities to see your life differently, and then decide what you want to do with what you see.
00:29:21.680 --> 00:29:38.240
And that's also why I've created the companion library, because I want to give you a way to take these ideas off the page and into your actual life, into your relationships, your work, your body, your leadership, and your room.
00:29:38.640 --> 00:29:43.440
If you'd like to pre-order your copy, you'll find the link in the show notes below.
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And then on October 7th, the book officially enters into the world, which feels both enormous and somehow like another beginning.
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Over the years, people have asked me, what does an aligned life actually look like?
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I don't think it looks like perfection.
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I don't think it looks like having all the answers.
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And I don't think it looks like never being triggered.
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I think an aligned life looks like someone who remembers, someone who remembers to pause, someone who remembers they have a choice, someone who remembers they are not all that furniture, someone who remembers they are the witness.
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Someone who remembers that the survival mind can speak without automatically getting to drive.
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And someone who learns to return to themselves with compassion instead of criticism.
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Again and again and again.
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That is alignment.
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Not never leaving the path.
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Instead, it's learning to love the practice of returning to it.
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And maybe that's where this strange little space between pre-order and launch is reminding me of, too.
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We spend so much time waiting for arrival, the launch, the achievement, the answer.
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The moment when everything finally became real.
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But life keeps happening in between, between the intention and the outcome, between awareness and embodiment, between who we've been and who we're practicing becoming.
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That's where free will lives.
00:31:37.599 --> 00:31:39.519
That's where sovereignty lives.
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That's where alignment lives.
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So wherever you find yourself today, whether your room feels beautifully organized, somewhat minimalist, or there's still a few pieces of furniture you're walking around, the light is still on, the witness is still there, and your next choice is still available.
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You don't have to become the person you want to be by tomorrow morning.
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Just practice being them in the next moment that asks.
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Then the next and the next.
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Until one day you realize you're no longer trying to remember the music.
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You're playing it.
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Thank you for walking this journey with me.
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Until next time, please keep turning on the light.
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Keep practicing alignment.
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Keep choosing who you want to be.
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You're the witness.
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You shape the field, and the field shapes your life.
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Thank you so much for spending this time with me today.
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My hope is that you leave each episode not with more information, but with greater awareness.
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Because awareness is where every meaningful change begins.
00:32:59.119 --> 00:33:11.680
If today's conversation resonated with you, I'd love for you to subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who's ready to stop surviving and start living from alignment.
00:33:11.920 --> 00:33:16.559
If you'd like to continue this work, you can join us inside the Aligned Human Project community.
00:33:16.720 --> 00:33:26.559
Explore the free five-element alignment assessment, or learn more about Align Your Life, Aligned Living, and Alignment Operating System at Practical Spiritualism Co.
00:33:27.039 --> 00:33:27.359
com.
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Remember, awareness reveals.
00:33:30.880 --> 00:33:35.440
Alignment chooses, and creation follows.
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You are the witness.
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You shape the field, and the field shapes your life.
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Until next time, keep pausing, keep noticing, and keep choosing.
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I'll see you in the next episode.