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I realized that I had settled for a limited life.
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I had lived that way for so long, it became normal.
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And my question as we go through this today is where in your life are you living a normal life that was never meant to be your normal?
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What if the normal you're accepting was never meant to be your normal?
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So if it is, then you have settled for something less than you were born and created to do an impact that you were created to have.
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Welcome to purpose-driven success with Mo Salami, where real journeys, mindset shifts, and strategic insights meet purpose-driven success.
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I'm your host, Mo Salami.
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Every week we dive into real conversations with high-achieving founders and leaders, uncovering the mindsets, strategies, and takeaways that help you define and achieve success on your own terms.
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Welcome to another episode of Purpose Driven Success.
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I'm your host, Mo Salami, and we are so blessed, the guest that we have on today, it's so, so blessed.
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It feels like I've known Rick forever, and we met out in Nashville, Tennessee.
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And because I know his work so well and I see him every day on my social media channels, LinkedIn, for example, I feel like I know Rick even more.
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You were in for such a gift of an episode today.
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Jumping straight in.
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And that means you.
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Rick is the author of Born Limitless and the creator of the Living Limitless app and the Limitless Life Blueprint Framework.
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Rick helps you renew your mindset, reconnect with your calling, and walk in faith-driven confidence every single day.
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So if you're tired of surface level success and you're hungry for truth, identity, and meaning, you will love today's episode.
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Rick's message is simple.
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You were born limitless.
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Rick Torreson, welcome to the show.
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Hey man.
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Mo, it's so good to be here.
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It's so good to see you.
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I love technology that lets us connect across the pond and be together.
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And I'm so honored that you'd have me as a guest on your podcast.
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I love what you do, and I've learned so much from you already.
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So, man, I'm I'm excited to have added today and to share a little bit and to learn a little bit as we go and hopefully add a lot of value to your listeners.
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I'm sure we will.
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So let's jump straight in.
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I know you're a man of frameworks and a great thinker, a man of ideas.
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Before we get to that, let's start with your story in your way.
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When you look back at your journey from where you started to becoming the limitless coach, what are the defining chapters that shaped who you are today?
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That's a great question.
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And uh I will try to give you the cliff note version, right?
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I'm gonna sum this up in a little bit of journey.
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And I think, you know, regardless of my story or situations that I went through, I think we all have similar stories in our lives that we have encountered experiences where whether we knew it or not at the time, they created limitations in our beliefs about ourselves, others, and the world around us through the way we interpreted experiences that happened, right?
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And they began to shape how we believed, right?
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And those beliefs begin to shape how we behave and then the outcomes we get.
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And so I have to tell you, I lived a limited life for a very long time, not knowing it.
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And it really all began as I began to unpack the ceiling I was running into in my life.
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Like I couldn't break through some places, and it was costing me.
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And I was pressing in, trying to, why can't I seem to get to that, whatever that next level was for me at that time?
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And uh I started pressing in.
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I got a coach, I had some people really that were asking me really good questions.
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I think that's the powerful thing about coaching, is you get a good coach, they know how to ask good questions.
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Briefly, the the journey, the markers, what I discovered was that at six years old, I was raised by a single mom and a grandmother, right?
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And uh, they were awesome, they loved me, but it was hard.
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And I'm I know I don't look at Mo, but I'm in my 60s, okay?
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I'm doing my best to stay young.
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But in those days, being a single mom back in the 70s, right, early 70s, wasn't a popular thing.
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It wasn't a common thing.
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And my mom had to work several jobs to take care of me.
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And in that process, she had to get a babysitter, right?
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And a babysitter was going to watch me in the evenings because it was her second job.
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And mom trusted the babysitter, so I trusted the babysitter.
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And when the abuse began, right, and I don't mean to jump into a real dark place or a negative place because I look at it differently.
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It was, it was no good.
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There was nothing good about it, it wasn't positive.
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But as I look at my journey of my life, it marked me.
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And it began this journey for me.
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And that that abuse in that place caused me to view myself, others, and the world around me in a certain manner.
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And so then it caused me to then begin to act and behave in a way that was very self-protective, right?
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I would put myself out there, but really how I treated women throughout my life was very negative.
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It was, I'm not gonna let them get too close, all right.
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I'm gonna keep them at a distance.
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And then when they become a little overwhelming or feel like they're closing in, I'm gonna break it off and I'm gonna move away.
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Well, that worked until about 25 years old.
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So about 20, 20 years of my life, I was like, okay, and didn't even think about it until I met this woman of my dreams, man.
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She was the person I wanted to marry.
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And I remember getting ready to propose and the whole process.
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And in that process, I'm gonna propose to her that night, got it all worked out.
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We go to dinner, favorite restaurant.
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I proceed to make her so mad at me that she's done with me and she wants to end the relationship.
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And it was in that moment that I thought, what have I just done?
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Why did I do that?
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And it was like this flashback in me is like all the relationships I had done that with, but none of them had the impact that she did.
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And I thought, man, this is not okay.
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And what I realized in that process, we worked through it, we're good, we got married, we've been married for 37 years, two great kids, just had my first grandkids.
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So it all worked out well.
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But it was a it was a moment where I said, man, I can't run anymore.
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I got to face this thing that's hitting me.
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What is it that's this belief system that I have that's causing me to settle for something less than I was born and created for?
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And so when I dug into that and I had some good coaches and good people around me that helped me process, I realized that I had settled for a limited life.
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I had lived that way for so long, and I want everyone to hear this, it became normal.
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And my question as we go through this today is where in your life are you living a normal life that was never meant to be your normal?
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What if the normal you're accepting was never meant to be your normal?
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And so if it is, then you have settled for something less than you were born and created to do, an impact that you were created to have.
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And so sometimes we have to challenge normal.
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So that's what happened at 25 years old.
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I was challenging this normal.
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Like, oh my goodness, what am I doing?
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And I realized I had created a belief system that drove my behaviors.
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And we can get into that if you want, but I believe that all of our behaviors are driven by our beliefs, consciously and unconsciously.
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We can't act in a way contrary to what we believe.
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And then our behaviors produce our outcomes.
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And my outcomes was broken and damaged relationships for 20 years, right?
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And I just never saw it that way.
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I never saw it as a collective.
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It was just I was living my life.
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So, anyways, that would be the biggest marker that started me on this road.
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And I realized in that moment that began to develop over the next 25, 30 years to where I am today, of this idea that how many of us and what other areas of my life am I settling for something?
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If I put a ceiling on myself, and I was successful.
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I was president of the fraternity, basketball coach, basketball player in high school and college.
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So on the outside, I was very successful pursuing.
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But every time I was getting to that level of success, I'd run.
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I'd disconnect.
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I'd somehow sabotage myself so that I wouldn't have to prove that I actually could be who I was pretending to be.
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And I thought, man, I can't keep doing this anymore.
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In a nutshell, that was the biggest marker.
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And then I learned other areas that I had set up limitations.
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And I think for all of us, Mo, you could probably agree to this with your coaching, is we've got these limitations that we've set on ourselves that we don't even realize that are there.
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And until we can challenge those, we'll never see the potential for our lives.
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And we will settle for success instead of kind of things you talk about, instead of pushing past success to something greater, which I talk about as significance.
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That's what got me so motivated to help set other people free, to discover those limitations, and then walk into the greatness that I know that they were born and created to have and the impact in their people and the world around them.
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Rick, what an intro.
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So you mentioned that beliefs lead to behaviors.
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And most of these beliefs, they tend to be limiting beliefs.
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Where do these limiting beliefs come from and how do we recognize them?
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Great question.
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Two really good questions.
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And the second one I get a lot, like, I don't think I have any limiting beliefs.
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And I'm like, well, we all have them.
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So let's just put that on the table.
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We all have them somewhere, whether we know it or not.
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It's a part of our lives, right?
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So the trauma I went through, my limiting belief wasn't the trauma.
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My limiting belief was how I interpreted and perceived the trauma and what it meant about me, what I thought it said about me.
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So typically, our limiting beliefs come from places in our lives, experiences that we go through, good and bad, right?
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We can have limitless beliefs as well, right?
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When we have some of those, there's some areas we're just killing it.
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So it's really how we perceive experiences and then how we define them, and then we define ourselves, others, and the world around us based on our definition of that experience.
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So I was abused, right?
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Or and I couldn't talk to my mom, I couldn't tell anyone.
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So inside is a narrative that begins to play.
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Well, mom trusted the babysitter, I should trust the babysitter.
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So if this is happening and it doesn't feel right and I don't think it's okay, it must not be the babysitter because mom trusts her.
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It must be something about me.
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So the narrative I began to tell myself about this experience to protect myself, to understand the situation, began to shape my beliefs about me, my value, my worth.
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Right.
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And then I started to see others, especially women, females, in a certain way.
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All women want to.
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So I make these generalizations, again, inside, unconsciously in my narrative about women and the things that they desire and what their purpose is in my life.
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And then I superimpose that also on the world.
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Man, the world's not a safe place.
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The world just wants to.
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So how I interpreted my experience, the definition of it, how I saw myself in it, the narratives I told myself began to shape my beliefs.
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And some of those are limited.
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And then I could look at other situations where I was encouraged.
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You know, I was an athlete.
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So I was always encouraged.
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Man, you're good.
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You've got these skills, you're the best defensive player, you bring all this energy.
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I believe that.
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Like this is being poured into me.
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And so I excelled in that area.
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I believed I could do whatever I put my mind to in that area.
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To me, that's where that comes from.
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So we all have stories and narratives we told ourselves that created limitations or limitless beliefs that we then begin to act and support by our behavior that then began to produce this series of outcomes.
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So stories, beliefs, behaviors, outcomes.
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Yes, sir.
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How do we now iterate these?
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Because I'm assuming the behaviors we can attribute to worldview or perhaps identity pieces.
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Are they worldview pieces, identity pieces?
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And how can a coach help you iterate those behaviors?
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And we've mentioned a pathway to get to the behaviors already.
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It's really causing people to ask questions.
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When someone comes to me in coaching, right, or we get connected, not every connection is a fit because what I'm looking for is someone who's willing to challenge normal.
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They usually end up in front of me because they've hit a wall somewhere, either relationally or professionally or personally.
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They've tried to break through things, they've tried to do things, and they've been unsuccessful at moving to that next place.
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They may be a manager in a company and the CEO said, Hey, could you coach one of my members?
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I know they've got talent and ability and skills, but they just can't seem to move on to the next place.
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And so part of that is their willingness in the interview to say, Can we challenge?
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Can I challenge you?
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Are you open for me to challenge some of the things that you believe and why you believe them and what you think about them, the truths that you have?
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So the first thing is really getting them to allow the conversation to happen.
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We want to provoke that.
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And then helping them self-assess because they're like, well, I don't know if I have, I don't know what they are, I don't know where they're from, I don't know how to identify them.
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And so I ask them, I said, start listening, and this will happen for the people that are listening to us.
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For the next 24 to 36 hours, you're gonna hear this word that I'm gonna mention to you.
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Start looking for ways where you say, I can't, I'm not, I've never, I don't.
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Those statements, like when someone suggests something, hey, can you help me do?
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Would you build this?
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Can we go do this?
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And if your first response is, no, I've never really been good at that, or no, I really can't do this, or I've not XYZ, whatever it might be, those are tells that there may be a limiting belief behind it.
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I can't, I'm not, I'm never, I won't.
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So begin to pay attention.
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So all of the listeners, as you're talking to friends, as you're talking to coworkers, as you're working with employees or with your spouse or significant others, right?
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Whoever it is in your life, if you hear yourself, catch yourself saying, No, I can't do that, or no, I've never been able to do this, just pause for a minute and wonder what is it that you're saying you can't, you're not, you're never, or you won't about?
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And then be willing to ask yourself, is that really true?
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Here's the rub, Mo, because they'll go, Well, I've got story after story that validates its truth.
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That's what they'll tell me.
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Like, but yeah, I can say it's true because every time I try to do this, X, Y happens.
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I said, absolutely.
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It's like a self-fulfilling prophecy because you've already believed that it's going to happen before you even start.
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So you begin to move and act in a way subconsciously to reinforce the belief.
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And if the belief is I can't, I'm not, I'm never, I won't, your behaviors subconsciously will begin to move in that direction to make sure that you can't, you're not, you're never, or you won't.
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So pay attention to your language.
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The big one that I tell people to watch out for that has the typically anchored into a limiting belief is the word but.
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It's like when you say, hey, I'm looking for a new Cadillac.
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I can't wait for this car, right?
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A blue Cadillac, and all of a sudden you see it everywhere.
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So I'm just putting into everyone's subconscious right now the word but.
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When you hear yourself say, I can help you with this, but 90% of the time the word but negates everything before it.
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Actually, what you're saying is, I really don't believe everything I just said.
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Now let me tell you what I truly believe.
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Oh, I would love to help you, but I would love to build that, but I would love to pursue that program or put that team together or do this, but.
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And then everything you say after that is what you actually believe.
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It's the excuses and justification you make for why you're not going to do what it is you said you'd love to do.
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So, but is a great way to identify potential limiting beliefs that you have in your life personally or professionally.
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The other side of that is but is also a very good word because it allows you to negate the negative.
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Man, I can't do this.
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I've never been able to do this, but I'm going to, and now you're telling yourself, I've never done this, but I'm going to do it.
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So you move yourself away from that negative belief that you have.
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That's kind of the process and how I help people identify it.
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And once we can identify it, then we can begin to work through it.
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I don't know if that answers what you were asking or not, Mo, but that's that's kind of the process and how I help people identify it.
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And once we can identify it, then we can begin to work through it.
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Is that did that kind of answer what you were asking?
00:18:33.720 --> 00:18:34.200
Absolutely.
00:18:34.360 --> 00:18:37.560
There's that phrase of be good to yourself when you talk to yourself.
00:18:37.640 --> 00:18:53.560
And this is that next level where you're feeding intentionally your subconscious mind, erasing the butt and erasing the negative and speaking in more captivating language to now feed forward your conscious mind.
00:18:53.640 --> 00:18:55.480
So that answers for sure.
00:18:55.800 --> 00:18:57.160
Let's go back in time.
00:18:57.480 --> 00:19:05.000
When you think back to the early part of your life and your career, how did you personally define success?
00:19:05.320 --> 00:19:07.480
And where did that definition come from?
00:19:07.720 --> 00:19:08.600
Yeah, absolutely.
00:19:08.759 --> 00:19:09.640
That's a great question.
00:19:09.720 --> 00:19:18.600
And I love your work in this as well, because you talk about the difference between success and sustainable growth and the transformation that we're looking for.
00:19:18.759 --> 00:19:21.000
And you know, I think success is a powerful thing.
00:19:21.080 --> 00:19:25.480
And I think it's something we all have been wired into our DNA.
00:19:25.640 --> 00:19:26.920
Be successful, right?
00:19:27.080 --> 00:19:29.320
And then we have to go, what does that look like?
00:19:29.560 --> 00:19:31.720
Am I building my success based on Mo?
00:19:32.200 --> 00:19:35.000
Like if I get to where Mo is, I'm successful.
00:19:35.160 --> 00:19:40.600
If I can have worked for Tony Robbins and if I can have coached 100,000 people, you know, that success.
00:19:40.759 --> 00:19:44.840
Well, so we have to look first at is how are we defining success?
00:19:45.000 --> 00:19:46.759
What does success mean to me?
00:19:46.920 --> 00:19:47.960
What does it mean to you?
00:19:48.040 --> 00:19:49.320
They have to be unique.
00:19:49.560 --> 00:19:51.640
And so then I think that's an important thing.
00:19:51.800 --> 00:19:54.200
We should all seek to be successful.
00:19:54.600 --> 00:19:58.600
But what I learned in the process is success is still a limitation.
00:19:58.920 --> 00:20:00.600
Success is still less than.
00:20:00.759 --> 00:20:05.640
It's good, and we should pursue success, but success is all about me.
00:20:05.880 --> 00:20:10.120
It's about what I can do and my achievement and what I'm capable of.
00:20:10.360 --> 00:20:12.440
And success is I learn through it.
00:20:12.519 --> 00:20:15.640
Like I was a successful basketball player until I wasn't.
00:20:15.880 --> 00:20:16.200
Right.
00:20:16.279 --> 00:20:17.160
I I was good.
00:20:17.240 --> 00:20:18.279
I could play at high school.
00:20:18.360 --> 00:20:19.080
I played at college.
00:20:19.240 --> 00:20:20.680
I tried to play overseas a little bit.
00:20:20.759 --> 00:20:27.480
And then I realized no matter how much I self-talk myself, I just don't have the skill set to be at that next level.
00:20:27.640 --> 00:20:29.720
But I was successful, right?
00:20:30.040 --> 00:20:34.440
But when I stopped playing basketball, did I stop being successful?
00:20:35.000 --> 00:20:36.759
Was I no longer a success?
00:20:37.560 --> 00:20:42.680
Is success just conditioned upon my ability to achieve something in an area of my life?
00:20:42.759 --> 00:20:45.640
And then when I can't achieve it, I I stop being successful.
00:20:45.960 --> 00:20:47.080
That's kind of how we live.
00:20:47.320 --> 00:20:49.880
So we're always chasing the next success.
00:20:50.840 --> 00:20:53.400
So what I realized is success is important.
00:20:53.560 --> 00:20:56.200
We must pursue success, but it's less than.
00:20:56.600 --> 00:21:00.600
The difference is, I believe, we should pursue a significant life.
00:21:00.920 --> 00:21:04.680
Significance is not about me, it's about we.
00:21:05.000 --> 00:21:08.120
It's about the legacy that's left after I'm gone.
00:21:08.200 --> 00:21:11.320
It's the ripple that the pebble has in a pond.
00:21:11.640 --> 00:21:28.840
Significance is that ripple that keeps moving out because I see the life and what I'm doing, not from the lens of what it can do for me, but what can I offer, provide, what do I have to give to others and the world around me that is greater than me?
00:21:29.000 --> 00:21:36.759
And I think that is in our core nature, I believe, whether we've identified it or not, for me, that's where fulfillment comes.
00:21:36.920 --> 00:21:40.840
I want to be successful, but I want to live a significant life.
00:21:41.080 --> 00:21:44.200
And to live a significant life, it's a different mindset.
00:21:44.440 --> 00:21:58.600
I have to find humility, not weakness, not less than, but humility that allows me to be all that I am, but not lead with that so that I can be all I can be for the people and the world around me.
00:21:58.759 --> 00:22:00.840
It's that thing that I can leave.
00:22:01.000 --> 00:22:05.480
It's the story that my children tell when I'm long gone when someone says, I heard about your dad.
00:22:05.640 --> 00:23:20.520
Or for Mo, like, man, I heard about this Mo guy, man.
00:23:20.600 --> 00:23:21.080
He was awesome.
00:23:21.160 --> 00:23:22.600
Can you tell me about him?
00:23:22.840 --> 00:23:28.840
You don't want him to say, oh, he had a huge podcast and drove a cool car and worked with Tony Robbins.
00:23:28.920 --> 00:23:29.960
That's not what we want him to say.
00:23:30.120 --> 00:23:33.880
What we'd like people to say is, man, he changed my life.
00:23:34.120 --> 00:23:35.160
He encouraged me.
00:23:35.240 --> 00:23:36.360
He always lifted me up.
00:23:36.520 --> 00:23:38.200
He spoke into my future.
00:23:38.360 --> 00:23:50.040
He helped me break through these limitations to where I could be not just successful, but that's the narrative I would love the world to tell about when they encountered Rick, what was the experience?
00:23:50.200 --> 00:23:52.120
That's a significant life.
00:23:52.280 --> 00:24:00.360
And I think that should be for me and people I work with, that's the transition that I want to see people move through.
00:24:00.680 --> 00:24:01.560
Does that help?
00:24:01.720 --> 00:24:05.080
Is that kind of that really helps?
00:24:05.400 --> 00:24:08.840
And that frame of significance.
00:24:10.120 --> 00:24:11.560
I want to ask as well, Rick.
00:24:11.960 --> 00:24:13.400
You know, we all have our journeys.
00:24:13.800 --> 00:24:22.760
Before your message formed around living limitless, and I I love that concept by the way what version of yourself were you operating from internally?
00:24:23.720 --> 00:24:30.040
Before that message fully solidified of living, limitless exclamation mark.
00:24:30.360 --> 00:24:30.840
Yeah.
00:24:31.080 --> 00:24:34.360
I think we are and we are not yet.
00:24:35.000 --> 00:24:43.000
You already are successful, you are living a significant, you are good, you are achieving, and we're not yet.
00:24:43.160 --> 00:24:46.440
There is that thing that we are hopefully constantly becoming.
00:24:46.600 --> 00:24:50.840
I want to believe that I can continually grow and learn and become, right?
00:24:51.000 --> 00:25:05.560
So that version of where I was is still, there's remnants of that that I work through my entire life as I become the next version, like used to that better version of my world, my geography, my you know, sphere of influence, right?
00:25:05.720 --> 00:25:15.000
And so the person I was, and I think again, we use this, and sometimes the words get used too much and we lose the meaning, but that imposter syndrome kind of idea, right?
00:25:15.080 --> 00:25:17.160
I, you know, again, it gets used a lot.
00:25:17.400 --> 00:25:19.320
Oh, and I don't have it, or I do have it.
00:25:19.400 --> 00:25:30.680
Or so if I was going to clean it up and say, you know, there is a version that I saw myself when I looked in the mirror that was successful and encouraging and like strong and confident.
00:25:30.840 --> 00:25:43.000
And right behind that, that dual person was someone who was afraid and timid and would overcompensate and always feel he had to prove himself to be that next thing.
00:25:43.240 --> 00:25:50.920
I was building, I was a coach and I was a pastor for a while, and before I got into what I'm doing the last 20 years, and I have two adopted children.
00:25:51.000 --> 00:25:54.280
So is it okay if I share a quick story about this?
00:25:54.600 --> 00:25:55.240
Let's do it.
00:25:55.320 --> 00:25:56.280
Let's do it.
00:25:56.600 --> 00:25:59.080
I have two adopted children from birth.
00:25:59.400 --> 00:26:02.520
Amazing stories in themselves, and uh such a blessing.
00:26:02.680 --> 00:26:12.040
My son's now 31, my daughter's 28, she just had our first granddaughter, but they had some very difficult seasons of their life, extremely challenging.
00:26:12.120 --> 00:26:14.200
It caused us to have to make changes in our life.
00:26:14.360 --> 00:26:20.360
I was building a church, I had a commercial cleaning company, I had a coffee shop, entrepreneurial stuff.
00:26:20.440 --> 00:26:27.480
We were building things, and then my son hit a wall, and that wall was devastating, and he became suicidal.
00:26:27.640 --> 00:26:31.800
And so we went through seven various attempts at suicide.
00:26:31.960 --> 00:26:39.800
And so we had to make some serious life decisions in our home about how to make sure he lived, literally, was going to live.
00:26:39.880 --> 00:26:40.680
And how do we do that?
00:26:40.840 --> 00:26:47.320
My wife had a great job, worked for her dad, vice president of a company, was the primary financial part of our family.
00:26:47.400 --> 00:26:49.000
And I was building and doing things.
00:26:49.160 --> 00:27:01.240
And so when we made the decision, long story short, I decided I was gonna step away from everything, stop the commercial cleaning, the coffee shop, the pastoring, the church, and I was gonna be a stay-at-home dad because I was an educator at first.
00:27:01.320 --> 00:27:02.440
I was a school teacher.
00:27:02.600 --> 00:27:06.600
So I'm gonna be a stay-at-home dad and be there for my son and work on that.
00:27:06.840 --> 00:27:08.040
My wife was gonna keep working.
00:27:08.280 --> 00:27:27.000
Well, that period of time, and then my daughter went through some issues, was about a 15-year window where I stopped building, growing, doing, and that was in my 30s, mid-30s to mid-40s, and I became a dad, and that was my job to take care of my family.
00:27:27.080 --> 00:27:31.240
And I volunteered and started some nonprofits, but I let all the growth go.
00:27:31.480 --> 00:27:37.960
So when my kids got healthy, again, long story short, but when my kids got healthy, I started asking, what do I do now?
00:27:38.440 --> 00:27:39.880
What does life look like now?
00:27:40.040 --> 00:27:41.080
I need to go produce.
00:27:41.160 --> 00:27:46.360
I had it in me to build, and I was building, and I was building in trajectory of growth.
00:27:46.520 --> 00:27:52.680
Well, now when I was coming back into it at almost 50 years old, I'm like, well, I don't have any experience.
00:27:52.760 --> 00:27:54.280
I've lost 15 years in the workplace.
00:27:54.360 --> 00:28:00.280
So now my self-confidence, my energy, my motivation internally, externally, I was still this confident.
00:28:00.360 --> 00:28:01.720
Look at me, I'm gonna go build.
00:28:01.880 --> 00:28:08.760
But every time I went to an executive or I went to the Chamber of Commerce here in the United States to work with them, inside I'm dying.
00:28:09.000 --> 00:28:11.320
There was a view of myself that said, Why am I here?
00:28:11.400 --> 00:28:12.760
And why would they listen to me?
00:28:12.920 --> 00:28:14.840
And I've been a dad.
00:28:15.080 --> 00:28:16.360
That's been what's your job?
00:28:16.520 --> 00:28:18.280
I was a dad for 15 years.
00:28:18.440 --> 00:28:20.360
Yes, it was the most important thing I could have done.
00:28:20.440 --> 00:28:23.080
I would do it all again, but the world doesn't see that.
00:28:23.320 --> 00:28:28.200
They, you know, my perception was they had this view of me that was less than.
00:28:28.280 --> 00:28:29.640
Why would they want me to coach them?
00:28:29.720 --> 00:28:31.720
Why would they want me to do leadership with them?
00:28:31.880 --> 00:28:35.800
Why would they want any of that when my experience has been sitting at home with my kids?
00:28:35.960 --> 00:28:37.160
That was the narrative.
00:28:37.400 --> 00:28:43.960
So that has still been a part of my journey as I built and I and I wrote the book and I was moving through this.
00:28:44.120 --> 00:28:54.040
It's been this constant maturing and evolution of my own looking in the mirror and declaring over my life, and I I wear a bracelet, it's on my shirt, I will, I can, I am.
00:28:54.120 --> 00:28:56.520
I started changing my conversation.
00:28:56.840 --> 00:29:00.680
Man, I will be a coach, a successful coach, a significant coach.
00:29:00.840 --> 00:29:02.920
I can lead leaders.
00:29:03.400 --> 00:29:07.960
I am a leader, I am a coach, I am significant.
00:29:08.360 --> 00:29:13.880
I had to start changing that narrative because the person inside wasn't aligning with what I was showing up outside.
00:29:13.960 --> 00:29:16.840
And the truth is, we all know this, eventually those worlds collide.
00:29:17.000 --> 00:29:23.000
And that world inside is going to show up on the outside, and people are going to either feel it, see it, sense it, or know it.
00:29:23.240 --> 00:29:25.640
And I had to bring alignment and congruity.
00:29:25.880 --> 00:29:28.520
And so that was who I was.
00:29:29.080 --> 00:29:31.720
And I kept realizing I can't break through to the next level.
00:29:31.880 --> 00:29:41.400
I can't really do what I desire to do if I don't deal with the person inside here that says you're you're less than and you don't deserve to be where you are.
00:29:42.120 --> 00:29:43.160
And I'm still there.
00:29:43.240 --> 00:29:47.800
There's still areas I get with you and I'm like, man, what am I doing with Mo?
00:29:48.200 --> 00:29:51.880
Man, his story and his journey and who he's been with and all this he's done.
00:29:51.960 --> 00:29:57.800
And I look at the people that you've interviewed, you know, Lee, the Lee Jackson, the last guy, I was like, man, I can't compete with him.
00:29:57.880 --> 00:29:58.600
I'm not there.
00:29:58.840 --> 00:30:00.360
John Gallagher, who we both know.
00:30:00.440 --> 00:30:02.280
I was like, well, John's really doing a great job.
00:30:02.440 --> 00:30:05.240
And his story, and I'm like, and I have to stop myself.
00:30:05.400 --> 00:30:06.360
It's like, time out.
00:30:06.520 --> 00:30:07.560
I am not them.
00:30:08.200 --> 00:30:08.920
I am me.
00:30:09.000 --> 00:30:11.960
What is the and you said this, what's the best version of me?
00:30:13.240 --> 00:30:15.080
What have I been gifted and called to do?
00:30:15.240 --> 00:30:16.360
What is my gift to Mo?
00:30:16.600 --> 00:30:17.640
What is my gift to the world?
00:30:17.800 --> 00:30:24.920
Not from a pride place, but if I don't discover it, find it, and get confident in it, then I am shorting the world of me.
00:30:25.080 --> 00:30:31.320
And I know that sounds prideful, but I would tell everyone the world is going to miss something if you don't show up in your best self.
00:30:31.560 --> 00:30:39.960
The world will lack something, your family will lack something, your friends, your business will miss something that you own that only you can give them.
00:30:40.520 --> 00:30:52.840
So until you believe you're worthy of that, you have value of that, that that is who you are, and the world needs you, you're going to keep holding back, reserving the greatest part of you.
00:30:53.000 --> 00:30:54.760
And the world needs that.
00:30:55.800 --> 00:31:01.320
I mean this is really great.
00:31:01.640 --> 00:31:07.240
Again, feeding the subconscious to serve the conscious mind.
00:31:08.120 --> 00:31:16.280
I want to give a huge debt of gratitude to the people that were in that position you mentioned or are in that position.
00:31:16.600 --> 00:31:28.360
I'm talking about parents right now, because a lot of times you have parents who've dedicated their life and done it properly to raising the next generation.
00:31:28.760 --> 00:31:41.800
And as you mentioned, a lot of times the outcome of that is I'm just uh, you know, there's a moment when they want to pursue their own thing, their own way, and I'm just uh fill in the blank.
00:31:41.960 --> 00:31:52.200
I'm just uh okay, so you're you're out in the I will, I can, I am mindset and philosophy, and you've come from being just a parent.
00:31:52.520 --> 00:32:04.360
And my question to you is are there transferable skills that the parent doesn't see from being just a parent that are incredibly useful when they go out into the big wide world?
00:32:04.600 --> 00:32:07.160
Well, we could do a whole podcast just on this, Mo.
00:32:07.400 --> 00:32:16.520
I mean, this is so important because no one, we are never just a first thing is we got to get that out of the vocabulary.
00:32:16.600 --> 00:32:17.240
And it's so true.
00:32:17.320 --> 00:32:19.480
Well, I'm I was just a I was just a coach.
00:32:19.640 --> 00:32:20.920
I was just a dad.
00:32:21.240 --> 00:32:22.040
Time out.
00:32:22.360 --> 00:32:24.360
When I hear people say that, I'm like, no, no, no, no.
00:32:24.600 --> 00:32:25.800
You are never just a.
00:32:25.960 --> 00:32:27.160
You are a dad.
00:32:27.320 --> 00:32:28.440
You are a coach.
00:32:28.600 --> 00:32:30.680
You are a friend, you are a husband.
00:32:30.840 --> 00:32:34.520
So that's the first thing is own the greatness of that.
00:32:34.760 --> 00:32:36.280
What's transferable?
00:32:36.680 --> 00:32:37.640
Everything.
00:32:38.280 --> 00:32:44.680
Because the first thing we've got to understand is the development and the growth of the human, of the person.
00:32:45.080 --> 00:32:48.440
Everything in life is personal before it's corporate.
00:32:48.920 --> 00:32:56.120
You are limited to what you can do corporate-wise, based on the limitations you believe or put on yourself personally.
00:32:56.360 --> 00:33:02.520
So when you think about being a parent, think about being a leader, a manager, a and I and I look at leadership different, right?
00:33:02.600 --> 00:33:08.840
So leadership, we typically talk about as a position, a title, a paycheck, a corner office, a car, and it is authority.
00:33:09.000 --> 00:33:10.280
But it's not first that.
00:33:10.360 --> 00:33:11.960
And I've been mentored by John Maxwell.
00:33:12.120 --> 00:33:14.040
I've been blessed to be in his world for a long time.
00:33:14.120 --> 00:33:17.720
And he talks about leadership as influence, nothing more, nothing less.
00:33:17.800 --> 00:33:27.960
And I really have built on that saying everyone is a leader because I do believe at its core, leadership is a posture, not a program, not a position.
00:33:28.120 --> 00:33:35.640
It's a posture that we take because when we come into a space, when I enter into a room, I bring my presence there.
00:33:35.800 --> 00:33:40.360
And when my presence shows up, it impacts that space, positively or negatively.
00:33:40.680 --> 00:33:41.240
People notice it.
00:33:41.320 --> 00:33:42.600
I don't have to say a word.
00:33:42.920 --> 00:33:45.640
We all influence space when we show up.
00:33:45.800 --> 00:33:50.520
And so leadership is our ability to influence by showing up and how we show up.
00:33:50.600 --> 00:33:51.400
So let me say that.
00:33:51.560 --> 00:33:59.080
So if that's true, then when we are raising people, my goal in leadership development is leaders raising leaders based on that definition.
00:33:59.240 --> 00:34:00.360
So let's be a parent.
00:34:00.600 --> 00:34:02.520
A parent implies I have a child.
00:34:02.680 --> 00:34:11.000
A child is someone who is starting out impressionable that one day will be on their own and be a parent and trying to influence and impact the world around them.
00:34:11.079 --> 00:34:16.840
So, what's the greatest gift I can give them is raise them up to be people of positive influence and impact.
00:34:17.000 --> 00:34:18.039
How do I do that?
00:34:18.200 --> 00:34:21.800
I help them with their mindset, their declarations, their beliefs.
00:34:21.880 --> 00:34:23.400
How do they fail well?
00:34:23.880 --> 00:34:24.119
Right?
00:34:24.280 --> 00:34:26.440
How do you fall forward and get back up?
00:34:26.599 --> 00:34:29.480
How do you deal with the things of life that are unexpected?
00:34:29.720 --> 00:34:37.720
Every skill set as a parent needs to successfully raise a child is the skill set we need as leaders to raise up industry, people.
00:34:37.960 --> 00:34:43.400
It all begins personally before it can ever be successful corporately.
00:34:43.639 --> 00:34:47.559
But we skip the personal to go build the corporate.
00:34:47.800 --> 00:34:51.159
And when we do that, we're building on shifting sand.
00:34:51.240 --> 00:34:54.440
And eventually what we built is going to collapse or not sustain.
00:34:54.519 --> 00:34:57.480
And then it's when I'm gone, what I built is gone.
00:34:57.720 --> 00:34:59.639
I don't want that to be my truth.
00:34:59.800 --> 00:35:01.960
I don't want to be my kids' truth.
00:35:02.519 --> 00:35:18.760
So everything about what you just said, everything we do as a parent or as a husband, the way we empower our spouse, my my spouse, or as a significant other in our lives, how I speak life into them, how I handle conflict, don't just walk away and quit.
00:35:18.920 --> 00:35:19.960
I've done my part.
00:35:20.119 --> 00:35:21.319
She needs to do her part.
00:35:21.879 --> 00:35:24.439
I've done all I can and we quit and we walk away.
00:35:24.759 --> 00:35:30.039
No, no, it's we we we can't be that casual with this.
00:35:30.119 --> 00:35:31.239
This is where life happens.
00:35:31.319 --> 00:35:38.359
A good friend of mine in coaching said when you're working with people and you're going through hard things, don't steal the struggle.
00:35:39.239 --> 00:35:40.759
Don't steal the struggle.
00:35:40.919 --> 00:35:48.119
The struggle's where growth happens, the struggle's where life change happens, the struggle is where awareness and realization can happen.
00:35:48.199 --> 00:35:49.159
It's not guaranteed.
00:35:49.239 --> 00:35:51.159
You've got to be willing to go through it.
00:35:51.399 --> 00:35:52.679
I've got a lot of words.
00:35:52.839 --> 00:35:57.559
My kids put a this a governor, we call them governors, like speed limit things on buses.
00:35:57.639 --> 00:36:01.079
I, you know, and cars, you could only go so fast and then it would shut you down.
00:36:01.239 --> 00:36:03.480
My kids said, I need a word governor on my life.
00:36:03.559 --> 00:36:07.000
Like, dad, when you hit your word limit, you can't talk anymore during the day.
00:36:07.239 --> 00:36:17.960
So I know I use a lot of words, but but I say that to help us understand the repetition of it, that there isn't a thing that we do that doesn't translate into the world.
00:36:18.199 --> 00:36:34.919
If we first focus on the development of self and then the empowerment and development of others to believe, to see themselves as they were created, born, and destined to be, not as they see themselves, but with the greatness that's in them.
00:36:36.439 --> 00:36:37.959
Our words are powerful, Mo.
00:36:38.199 --> 00:36:48.999
I mean, our words to lift and to and to empower and to equip and to propel are powerful and just as powerful to tear down and destroy and corrupt and kill.
00:36:50.119 --> 00:36:55.639
There's a verse I love in Proverbs that says, There's power in the tongue to give life or take life.
00:36:55.879 --> 00:36:59.159
And in some translations it says, you choose.
00:37:00.599 --> 00:37:01.959
It's my choice.
00:37:02.839 --> 00:37:04.039
It's always a choice, yeah.
00:37:04.359 --> 00:37:12.359
It's my choice to speak words of life over myself or others that give life, or I can speak words of death over myself and others.
00:37:12.679 --> 00:37:16.919
But the power in that tongue of what comes out and I speak is so important.
00:37:18.919 --> 00:37:26.919
It is such a an empowering message for wives, husbands, mothers, fathers.
00:37:27.079 --> 00:37:29.399
So uh thanks for your words on that.
00:37:30.359 --> 00:37:33.319
The likelihood, Rick, is this is going to be a double episode.
00:37:33.479 --> 00:37:39.799
So um, you know, um Rory says there's no such thing as too long, there's only too boring.
00:37:40.119 --> 00:37:43.479
And the words you're using, these are powerful, you know.
00:37:44.119 --> 00:37:45.639
There's no word wastage here.
00:37:45.719 --> 00:37:48.199
Like these are powerful words, powerful sentiments.
00:37:48.919 --> 00:37:50.119
So that's all fine.
00:37:50.279 --> 00:38:03.159
And pretty early, I thought, oh, this will be our first ever in the history of this podcast double episode because the words you're sharing are gold, and the wisdom you're sharing is just gold, frankincense, and myrrh.
00:38:03.479 --> 00:38:04.279
There you go.
00:38:04.599 --> 00:38:14.439
And Rick, during your journey, was there a point where you thought achieving more didn't feel like becoming more?
00:38:14.679 --> 00:38:16.919
And what did that disconnect feel like?
00:38:17.239 --> 00:38:25.239
It's basically where you're getting the double your revenues and you're achieving more success.
00:38:25.399 --> 00:38:31.239
And you mentioned cars earlier and the bigger house, and just getting more stuff, as I call it.
00:38:31.399 --> 00:38:35.319
Was there a point where getting more stuff didn't feel like more?
00:38:36.919 --> 00:38:37.559
Yes.
00:38:38.679 --> 00:38:47.639
I've been fortunate in my journey a little bit, I guess, in one way, is that stuff was never something I pursued, right?
00:38:47.719 --> 00:38:53.079
I mean, I have desires and home and cars and things like that, but it it never drove me.
00:38:53.399 --> 00:38:58.599
So it wasn't this revelation of I've got all this thing, but I still feel empty.
00:38:58.679 --> 00:39:07.159
But it's a lot of people I work with, especially in the professional world, the CEOs, the entrepreneurs, it's like they're building and collecting and accumulating.
00:39:07.879 --> 00:39:12.999
Typically, if you go back to the source of what that's about, Mo, and you know this because this is the work you do.
00:39:13.559 --> 00:39:19.399
It's typically trying to find identity, value, and worth in something outside of ourselves.
00:39:19.639 --> 00:39:30.519
And until we recognize that, no matter how much I try to build and find and define from the world outside, there's a point where you just keep feeling it just doesn't fill the hole.
00:39:31.079 --> 00:39:35.879
It's interesting, Blaise Pascal, he was a mathematician, and he talked about this thing.
00:39:35.959 --> 00:39:38.519
And I don't know about his faith or if he was a faith person.
00:39:38.679 --> 00:39:42.199
I don't know about everyone's faith, and I'm not trying to put that on people, but he had a perspective.
00:39:42.279 --> 00:39:50.199
And he said he believed that humans were designed and created with what he called a god hole inside of them.
00:39:50.439 --> 00:39:54.919
And that god hole, they spend their whole life trying to fill.
00:39:55.479 --> 00:40:06.119
And it's the whole desires, it's got legitimate needs value, worth, belonging, love, identity are all the things that we want to use to fill that hole.
00:40:06.919 --> 00:40:12.439
Those are legitimate needs and desires, the stuff in the world, the recognition, they're legitimate.
00:40:12.519 --> 00:40:13.479
They're not illegitimate.
00:40:13.559 --> 00:40:16.039
They're okay to desire that, to want that.
00:40:16.439 --> 00:40:20.919
But we try to fill this hole in us through illegitimate means.
00:40:21.079 --> 00:40:30.199
It's a legitimate need and desire, but it's in illegitimate ways, thinking something in the world is going to fill this void that I feel.
00:40:30.439 --> 00:40:34.039
And the problem is we keep stuffing things in there and it's never enough.
00:40:34.199 --> 00:40:37.959
And it never feels full, and we never feel satisfied, and we don't understand it.
00:40:38.119 --> 00:40:48.519
His thought was until we fill the hole with the one who is designed to fill it, with the one who created the hole, we will never feel like we're enough.
00:40:48.599 --> 00:40:50.199
We will never find our identity.
00:40:50.359 --> 00:41:02.279
So if I was going to just translate that into our own journey, it's that place where the hole inside of us that we're trying to fill is legitimate, the needs that we have to value, worth, identity.
00:41:02.439 --> 00:41:06.919
But they're not found in our activity and the outside workings.
00:41:07.159 --> 00:41:12.519
They're found internally in our createdness, in our in just who we are.
00:41:12.839 --> 00:41:20.759
You are already good, you are already perfect, you are already worthy, you are already valuable.
00:41:21.159 --> 00:41:24.279
I'm just having to turn my belief system.
00:41:24.359 --> 00:41:32.839
I'm either going to believe the world, and we can go down a whole nother path that is against me, and we get filled, the phone, the thing, everything, the world is saying, hey, you're not good enough.
00:41:32.919 --> 00:41:35.399
You should be like this, you should look like this, you should do this.
00:41:35.639 --> 00:41:42.279
So now we're racing after this world's view of identity, value, and worth that is not for us.
00:41:42.439 --> 00:41:45.399
It's actually meant to kill, steal, and destroy our lives.
00:41:45.639 --> 00:41:47.239
It is not our friend.
00:41:47.479 --> 00:41:52.279
But we find ourselves agreeing with it and aligning with it and living chasing it.
00:41:52.519 --> 00:41:55.319
Or we can agree with our createdness.
00:41:55.399 --> 00:41:56.679
And for me, I'm a faith person.
00:41:56.759 --> 00:41:59.799
So I go with the one who created me who said, I already am these things.
00:41:59.879 --> 00:42:01.239
So who am I going to agree with?
00:42:01.399 --> 00:42:05.639
One that's for me for life, a future and a hope, or a world that's against me.
00:42:05.799 --> 00:42:12.919
And when I realign that structure to whatever that is in me that isn't the world, that hole begins to get filled.
00:42:12.999 --> 00:42:15.239
Now my identity, value, and worth is secure.
00:42:15.399 --> 00:42:20.999
And no matter what you say or do, or my achievement or success or failure doesn't get to mess with that.
00:42:21.239 --> 00:42:22.679
It's already set.
00:42:23.159 --> 00:42:24.359
I can stand secure.
00:42:24.439 --> 00:42:29.079
I'm less offended by things because the world doesn't revolve around me.
00:42:29.319 --> 00:42:31.559
It impacts me, but it's not about me.
00:42:31.719 --> 00:42:34.679
And so I can stand in a place of security and confidence.
00:42:34.759 --> 00:42:41.959
And then when I go try to get it, achieve, build, grow, do all that, man, I'm building it from a foundation of solid rock.
00:42:42.199 --> 00:42:46.999
And now the sky's the limit because it's not dependent on something out here in the world.
00:42:47.159 --> 00:42:51.319
They can't see us, but the the external, it's now built upon something internal.
00:42:51.399 --> 00:42:54.279
It says, I can, I will, and I am.
00:42:54.439 --> 00:43:00.119
The last thing I'll say about that, Mo is the why I chose those three words, really important.
00:43:00.919 --> 00:43:03.479
I start with I will, I can, and I am.
00:43:03.559 --> 00:43:04.519
I start with I will.
00:43:04.759 --> 00:43:06.839
I will is a statement of intention.
00:43:07.239 --> 00:43:10.119
We're telling our subconscious, I will do something.
00:43:10.279 --> 00:43:11.079
So we're getting ready.
00:43:11.159 --> 00:43:14.839
We're subconscious, hey, boss said we're gonna do this, we will do this.
00:43:14.919 --> 00:43:17.959
So now I'm all right, I will a statement of intention.
00:43:18.199 --> 00:43:20.519
I can is a statement of ability.
00:43:20.759 --> 00:43:23.239
I have the ability, I can do this.
00:43:23.639 --> 00:43:28.679
Most powerful declaration we can make is I am, because it's a statement of identity.
00:43:29.079 --> 00:43:31.319
I am telling myself, I am this.
00:43:32.119 --> 00:43:40.119
I am a builder, an executive, I am a business owner, I am successful, I am a father, I am a mother, I am a friend.
00:43:40.439 --> 00:43:41.319
It's identity.
00:43:41.479 --> 00:43:46.999
And when we can declare positive identity over ourselves, we will begin to live in that reality.
00:43:47.079 --> 00:43:49.399
And it changes everything.
00:43:52.519 --> 00:43:57.159
I appreciate the opportunity to share that, but that's to me, that's the core of it all.
00:43:59.639 --> 00:44:07.239
Was there a less than positive identity that you'd been building life on prior to discovering?
00:44:07.559 --> 00:44:08.359
Well, 100%.
00:44:09.079 --> 00:44:12.999
Um, I mean, it goes back to single mom, right?
00:44:13.159 --> 00:44:15.319
Being raised in a time when that wasn't part of it.
00:44:15.399 --> 00:44:19.479
I my uncle was the only male in my life, and he was a full-on hippie.
00:44:19.639 --> 00:44:21.879
I mean, Harley Davidson, long hair.
00:44:22.039 --> 00:44:26.039
People said he looked like Jesus, had the whole beard, you know, and I didn't grow up a person of faith.
00:44:26.119 --> 00:44:29.959
I don't, you know, I keep bringing that in there, but that's just been part of my story, my journey.
00:44:30.119 --> 00:44:36.119
But I mean, they lived in the basement, and everything the hippies did that was part of their world, but that was in my world, right?
00:44:36.199 --> 00:44:41.159
And so that was shaping my views, shaping my life, shaping how I saw the world.
00:44:41.319 --> 00:44:51.559
Um, and so all of that impacted how I saw myself, how I viewed myself, my value, my worth.
00:44:52.279 --> 00:45:00.039
And those are all things that I had to at some point face and recognize how I interpreted those things.
00:45:00.199 --> 00:45:05.799
Did I interpret them in a way that was true, or did I was uh believing a lie about those things?
00:45:06.279 --> 00:45:12.039
And I realized in the majority of those places, my beliefs around the experiences were lies.
00:45:12.679 --> 00:45:17.479
And so then I realized I built my life and behaviors off of lies.
00:45:17.719 --> 00:45:21.479
And I had to go back and reframe those lies to truth.
00:45:21.639 --> 00:45:28.519
The feelings were real, the experiences were real, but how I interpreted and defined them, it goes back to what we said earlier, weren't real.
00:45:28.599 --> 00:45:29.879
They weren't based in truth.
00:45:30.039 --> 00:45:32.599
And so that's where I had to go and reframe that.
00:45:33.799 --> 00:45:35.239
This is this is all great.
00:45:36.279 --> 00:45:44.119
Rick, how important is faith for achieving purpose-driven success?
00:45:44.679 --> 00:45:45.319
Yeah.
00:45:47.239 --> 00:45:59.079
So if we're talking about faith in terms of a spiritual faith, right, uh as in a belief in something greater than ourselves, if that's if that's the type of faith we're talking about, here's how I would say this.
00:45:59.239 --> 00:46:07.159
I think it is essential and non negotiable for sustained transformation.
00:46:07.319 --> 00:46:10.199
The key word is for sustained transformation.
00:46:10.439 --> 00:46:11.799
I can build anything.
00:46:12.039 --> 00:46:15.879
We are strong humans, we are capable, we can do a lot.
00:46:16.039 --> 00:46:17.559
Our will is powerful.
00:46:17.719 --> 00:46:21.159
When we put our mind to something, we can build, we can do great things.
00:46:21.399 --> 00:46:22.839
I don't know what the limit is there.
00:46:23.399 --> 00:46:31.799
But I believe in my experiences told me that when it's built on myself and my ability, it's limited and eventually is going to run into a wall.
00:46:32.039 --> 00:46:35.239
Eventually it's going to cost me something I didn't want to pay.
00:46:35.399 --> 00:46:38.519
A wife, a child, a family, a relationship, a business.
00:46:38.759 --> 00:46:47.399
When I build upon myself and I am the sole source of my success, I believe we settle for something less than.
00:46:47.559 --> 00:46:48.679
And it could be great.
00:46:48.839 --> 00:46:50.439
Less than doesn't mean it's terrible.
00:46:50.679 --> 00:46:59.159
We could build empires, but there's going to be a huge cost somewhere in there that we are either willing or not willing to admit or face.
00:46:59.479 --> 00:47:01.559
There will be great loss along the way.
00:47:01.719 --> 00:47:07.399
And I don't believe living in that space is one sustainable for long periods of time.
00:47:07.559 --> 00:47:13.079
And two, I don't believe it's a significant life without faith.
00:47:13.319 --> 00:47:15.719
So now, but we can be successful.
00:47:15.879 --> 00:47:17.879
Without faith, we can do a lot.
00:47:18.199 --> 00:47:26.279
I think with faith, we realize that I've been gifted with talents and abilities and skills and understanding and gifts.
00:47:26.439 --> 00:47:30.359
And when I put those to work and I do the work, I go after it.
00:47:30.439 --> 00:47:50.279
But I understand that I am limited ultimately, that apart from something greater than, that gives me the courage to go through hard places well, that gives me the strength to repent and seek forgiveness when I mess up so I can restore relationships, that gives me the ability to not be offended because the world doesn't revolve around me.
00:47:50.359 --> 00:47:58.039
If I'm building on myself, my strength, then really what I'm saying is the world revolves around Rick and I'm the one on the throne.
00:47:58.199 --> 00:48:01.239
And as long as I'm in charge, then I can do this.
00:48:01.319 --> 00:48:06.199
But then that also means that everyone else has the ability to offend me, hurt me, attack me.
00:48:06.279 --> 00:48:08.759
So I'm always defensive postures in that space.
00:48:08.839 --> 00:48:10.839
And man, that's, I don't know if you've ever been there.
00:48:10.919 --> 00:48:11.559
And I've been there.
00:48:11.639 --> 00:48:13.159
I mean, I've sat on my throne.
00:48:13.399 --> 00:48:14.919
It's exhausting.
00:48:15.399 --> 00:48:16.919
It's exhausting.
00:48:17.479 --> 00:48:17.799
Right.
00:48:17.959 --> 00:48:19.479
And we were never meant to live there.
00:48:19.639 --> 00:48:24.439
And so for me, again, long answer for this question, but it's so powerful.
00:48:24.839 --> 00:48:34.039
For me, tapping into that something greater, the belief that I was created with a purpose, a destiny, a future, and a hope in mind.
00:48:34.359 --> 00:48:35.799
I do believe, and I believe you were.
00:48:35.879 --> 00:48:38.679
I believe all humans, whether you guys believe that or not, isn't the point.
00:48:38.759 --> 00:48:40.119
I don't need you to believe it.
00:48:40.279 --> 00:48:41.959
I coach because I believe it.
00:48:42.119 --> 00:48:46.599
Because when I look at you, no matter where you are, what I see is something greater than what you see.
00:48:46.679 --> 00:48:48.119
And you're very successful.
00:48:48.279 --> 00:48:55.639
But Mo, you haven't even touched the tip of what God has, what I believe is destined for you.
00:48:55.959 --> 00:48:59.079
You're just playing with success and significance right now.
00:48:59.159 --> 00:49:00.759
There's so much more greatness in you.
00:49:00.919 --> 00:49:09.319
And what I mean by greatness is the ability to influence and impact the lives of the people and world around you that will live for generations.
00:49:09.639 --> 00:49:11.079
That's what you're meant to do.
00:49:11.319 --> 00:49:14.679
You're doing it, but you haven't seen the fullness of it yet.
00:49:15.559 --> 00:49:16.519
It's coming.
00:49:16.919 --> 00:49:20.839
It's always we're becoming, and that's powerful, man.
00:49:20.919 --> 00:49:23.079
And that's faith tells me that.
00:49:24.279 --> 00:49:26.359
Faith tells me there is more.
00:49:26.999 --> 00:49:28.599
Not stuff and things.
00:49:28.839 --> 00:49:29.959
This is really important.
00:49:30.519 --> 00:49:33.319
It's I say this, this is one of my key lines, right?
00:49:33.399 --> 00:49:34.359
You were created for more.
00:49:34.519 --> 00:49:39.319
Not stuff and things, but influence and impact, a future and a hope.
00:49:39.559 --> 00:49:41.479
I don't know what your more is, Mo.
00:49:41.799 --> 00:49:46.519
I don't know what your listeners' more is, but I believe that you were created for more.
00:49:46.679 --> 00:49:51.719
And my passion and purpose is how do I help you discover the more and walk it out?
00:49:53.479 --> 00:49:54.119
Absolutely.
00:49:54.199 --> 00:50:08.839
I'm hearing an extra layer of faith giving you humility and gratitude and having like an even better access to that to flourish even more.
00:50:09.239 --> 00:50:26.279
So if someone's listening to this, and again, we're not trying to convert anyone to anything, but if someone's listening to this and they're thinking you know, the the capacity of a human being is limited, we know that, or hopefully we know that the capacity of a human being is limited.
00:50:27.159 --> 00:50:38.279
And if someone decides they want to fill that god hole in certain faith, what's step number one?
00:50:42.839 --> 00:50:56.839
Well, I think step number one would be if that's not a place you've been or you've avoided it, or maybe life's experiences has caused you to have a negative view of quote religion, the institution of faith.
00:50:56.999 --> 00:51:05.959
There's a difference between the institution of faith that was created by man and the relationship of faith that was always intended to be.
00:51:06.199 --> 00:51:06.439
Right.
00:51:06.599 --> 00:51:08.119
And so I didn't grow up in a church.
00:51:08.199 --> 00:51:09.159
I didn't grow up of faith.
00:51:09.239 --> 00:51:10.119
I was far from it.
00:51:10.199 --> 00:51:12.039
There was that was not a part of my journey.
00:51:12.119 --> 00:51:14.199
I didn't care about it, I didn't think about it.
00:51:14.279 --> 00:51:15.959
I was until I met this woman.
00:51:16.119 --> 00:51:18.839
I told you about the woman in my dreams, I was sabotaging, right?
00:51:19.079 --> 00:51:23.079
Her dad came to me before we were married and he said, Listen, Rick, we think you're awesome.
00:51:23.239 --> 00:51:25.559
We're so glad you're a part of our daughter's life.
00:51:25.799 --> 00:51:33.799
But here's the thing: if you want a long-term, sustainable relationship with our daughter and this family, you need to get your life right with the Lord.
00:51:34.039 --> 00:51:37.399
And I was like, Lord, what's that?
00:51:37.959 --> 00:51:38.679
Isn't that me?
00:51:38.839 --> 00:51:42.279
I was like, I didn't say it, but inside I'm going, what are you talking about?
00:51:42.439 --> 00:51:43.399
And what does that mean?
00:51:43.559 --> 00:52:10.599
But where I would say you start is be open to a conversation, not about religion and institution and church, but about the belief and the idea that maybe there is a creator that is about relationship that says, Listen, I created you in my image, and that image is good and it's perfect, and it's and listen, there's bad and there's evil, and there's hate and there's brokenness, and we all have the proclivity in us to do damage, right?
00:52:10.759 --> 00:52:15.159
We're selfish beings in our nature just as we are, and that's not wrong.
00:52:15.239 --> 00:52:22.839
It's part of how we were created and wired, but submitted to a greater vision and a greater understanding of our identity, everything changes.
00:52:22.999 --> 00:52:29.559
And so I would say to people, listen, if you're trying to figure out what that looks like, what does that God hold?
00:52:29.639 --> 00:52:30.519
What is the thing?
00:52:30.759 --> 00:52:41.719
I would say, be willing to have conversation and begin to explore the idea that maybe there was a creator that looked at you and your createdness.
00:52:41.879 --> 00:52:43.639
There's a scripture that I love.
00:52:44.199 --> 00:52:49.319
And if it's okay to go there, it's it's one that was hit given to me before faith, before I went down that road.
00:52:49.479 --> 00:52:50.199
I didn't understand it.
00:52:50.359 --> 00:52:51.399
And so, hey, read this.
00:52:51.479 --> 00:52:54.279
And they gave me this scripture, and it was Psalm 139.
00:52:54.359 --> 00:52:56.599
I was like, okay, fine.
00:52:56.679 --> 00:52:58.439
I trust you, I like you, I'll read it.
00:52:58.599 --> 00:53:00.599
But I had no desire for anything.
00:53:00.759 --> 00:53:02.839
I wasn't against religion or faith or Christianity.
00:53:03.079 --> 00:53:04.279
I wasn't, it wasn't against it.
00:53:04.359 --> 00:53:05.719
I was like, but I wasn't for it.
00:53:05.879 --> 00:53:06.919
But I read it.
00:53:07.159 --> 00:53:17.239
Long story short, it's a story of David and God, and God's talking to David, and God is unpacking what he believes and thinks about David as a relationship.
00:53:17.399 --> 00:53:21.239
And he tells David, David, there's no place you can run or hide that I'm not there.
00:53:21.399 --> 00:53:23.079
I've numbered the hairs on your head.
00:53:23.319 --> 00:53:27.479
My thoughts for you are more numerous than every grain of sand on every seashore.
00:53:27.639 --> 00:53:28.519
I mean, just think of that.
00:53:28.679 --> 00:53:29.639
What does that mean?
00:53:29.799 --> 00:53:30.039
Right?
00:53:30.119 --> 00:53:33.559
He says, he says, you know, your highs, I'm with you, your lows, I'm with you.
00:53:33.639 --> 00:53:36.439
He unpacks this relationship.
00:53:36.679 --> 00:53:38.119
And I read it and I was blown away.
00:53:38.199 --> 00:53:43.319
I thought, wow, if that's what faith is, I'm really, really interested.
00:53:43.879 --> 00:53:48.519
Because that is an amazing relationship that is like life-giving.
00:53:48.599 --> 00:53:49.319
It's powerful.
00:53:49.399 --> 00:53:59.239
And so, so that would be where I'd say is just be willing to have an exploration around a conversation of relationship, not religion, not law, not institution.
00:53:59.479 --> 00:54:03.959
Now, I do think there's an importance in community and all that stuff, but it doesn't start there.
00:54:04.119 --> 00:54:11.639
It starts with a could it be that I was created by something who has a purpose, a future, a destiny, and a hope in mind for me?
00:54:11.879 --> 00:54:16.119
And when we get to the purity of my faith, that's exactly what it says.
00:54:16.679 --> 00:54:19.639
It's it talks about my creativity and my identity.
00:54:19.719 --> 00:54:25.319
And when I align my identity with my faith, what can the world do to me?
00:54:25.719 --> 00:54:31.079
Because it's not dependent on whether Mo likes what I say or doesn't, or he agrees or doesn't, it's okay.
00:54:31.239 --> 00:54:33.639
We can disagree, and I'm I'm okay with that.
00:54:33.879 --> 00:54:35.079
It's okay.
00:54:35.719 --> 00:54:52.999
So again, it's a lot there, but I would say the first step is be willing to consider the relational dynamic, a potential of a creator that has something incredible to say about you, that when you align with that, it's the foundation that is not shaky.
00:54:53.559 --> 00:54:55.959
My identity wasn't an abused child.
00:54:56.039 --> 00:54:57.159
That's not who I was.
00:54:57.319 --> 00:54:58.439
I didn't deserve it.
00:54:58.599 --> 00:55:00.119
And God said, no, that wasn't.
00:55:00.199 --> 00:55:01.719
And that's that was terrible.
00:55:01.879 --> 00:55:02.439
That was life.
00:55:02.519 --> 00:55:03.239
It shouldn't have happened.
00:55:03.399 --> 00:55:03.959
Bad things happen.
00:55:04.119 --> 00:55:05.159
This is the world we live in.
00:55:05.319 --> 00:55:07.479
But let me tell you, let me redefine you.
00:55:07.719 --> 00:55:09.159
You are actually a son.
00:55:09.319 --> 00:55:10.679
You are actually valued.
00:55:10.759 --> 00:55:12.439
You are actually worthy to be loved.
00:55:12.599 --> 00:55:14.599
You actually can love unconditionally.
00:55:14.759 --> 00:55:20.599
You actually are worthy to be in a relationship and find a soulmate that's meant to be with you for now 37 years.
00:55:20.679 --> 00:55:22.279
That's my best friend.
00:55:23.479 --> 00:55:24.119
Do you understand?
00:55:24.199 --> 00:55:30.359
It's like he realigned my identity with something greater than what I could have come up with on my own.
00:55:33.159 --> 00:55:36.359
Thank you for listening to Purpose Driven Success with Mo Salami.
00:55:36.759 --> 00:55:40.759
If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review.
00:55:40.839 --> 00:55:43.959
It's one of the best ways to help others discover the show.
00:55:44.119 --> 00:55:48.199
You can find links and resources and show notes at our website.
00:55:48.359 --> 00:55:55.079
And if today's episode inspired you, check out one of our other insight-filled, value-packed episodes.
00:55:55.239 --> 00:56:02.679
Next week we'll have another amazing guest, so stay tuned for even more real stories and actionable insights.
00:56:02.919 --> 00:56:11.559
Work on your mindset, work on your skill set, and always move in the direction of the result you want before you see the result you want.
00:56:11.719 --> 00:56:15.239
And until next time, do the best you can consistently.
00:56:15.559 --> 00:56:16.359
Ciao.
00:00:00.320 --> 00:00:05.120
I realized that I had settled for a limited life.
00:00:05.440 --> 00:00:08.960
I had lived that way for so long, it became normal.
00:00:09.199 --> 00:00:17.839
And my question as we go through this today is where in your life are you living a normal life that was never meant to be your normal?
00:00:18.079 --> 00:00:22.320
What if the normal you're accepting was never meant to be your normal?
00:00:22.480 --> 00:00:29.679
So if it is, then you have settled for something less than you were born and created to do an impact that you were created to have.
00:00:35.359 --> 00:00:45.200
Welcome to purpose-driven success with Mo Salami, where real journeys, mindset shifts, and strategic insights meet purpose-driven success.
00:00:45.359 --> 00:00:47.679
I'm your host, Mo Salami.
00:00:48.079 --> 00:01:02.079
Every week we dive into real conversations with high-achieving founders and leaders, uncovering the mindsets, strategies, and takeaways that help you define and achieve success on your own terms.
00:01:03.679 --> 00:01:08.799
Welcome to another episode of Purpose Driven Success.
00:01:09.040 --> 00:01:16.239
I'm your host, Mo Salami, and we are so blessed, the guest that we have on today, it's so, so blessed.
00:01:16.400 --> 00:01:20.879
It feels like I've known Rick forever, and we met out in Nashville, Tennessee.
00:01:21.120 --> 00:01:29.439
And because I know his work so well and I see him every day on my social media channels, LinkedIn, for example, I feel like I know Rick even more.
00:01:29.760 --> 00:01:33.599
You were in for such a gift of an episode today.
00:01:33.840 --> 00:01:35.359
Jumping straight in.
00:02:04.879 --> 00:02:06.239
And that means you.
00:02:06.799 --> 00:02:15.840
Rick is the author of Born Limitless and the creator of the Living Limitless app and the Limitless Life Blueprint Framework.
00:02:16.159 --> 00:02:24.639
Rick helps you renew your mindset, reconnect with your calling, and walk in faith-driven confidence every single day.
00:02:25.039 --> 00:02:32.879
So if you're tired of surface level success and you're hungry for truth, identity, and meaning, you will love today's episode.
00:02:33.120 --> 00:02:34.960
Rick's message is simple.
00:02:35.439 --> 00:02:37.360
You were born limitless.
00:02:37.599 --> 00:02:39.919
Rick Torreson, welcome to the show.
00:02:40.240 --> 00:02:40.960
Hey man.
00:02:41.280 --> 00:02:42.719
Mo, it's so good to be here.
00:02:42.800 --> 00:02:43.919
It's so good to see you.
00:02:44.159 --> 00:02:47.759
I love technology that lets us connect across the pond and be together.
00:02:47.840 --> 00:02:51.120
And I'm so honored that you'd have me as a guest on your podcast.
00:02:51.280 --> 00:02:54.479
I love what you do, and I've learned so much from you already.
00:02:54.639 --> 00:03:02.960
So, man, I'm I'm excited to have added today and to share a little bit and to learn a little bit as we go and hopefully add a lot of value to your listeners.
00:03:03.280 --> 00:03:04.159
I'm sure we will.
00:03:04.319 --> 00:03:05.439
So let's jump straight in.
00:03:05.599 --> 00:03:09.439
I know you're a man of frameworks and a great thinker, a man of ideas.
00:03:09.680 --> 00:03:13.199
Before we get to that, let's start with your story in your way.
00:03:13.680 --> 00:03:22.800
When you look back at your journey from where you started to becoming the limitless coach, what are the defining chapters that shaped who you are today?
00:03:23.759 --> 00:03:24.960
That's a great question.
00:03:25.120 --> 00:03:29.120
And uh I will try to give you the cliff note version, right?
00:03:29.439 --> 00:03:31.840
I'm gonna sum this up in a little bit of journey.
00:03:32.000 --> 00:03:54.560
And I think, you know, regardless of my story or situations that I went through, I think we all have similar stories in our lives that we have encountered experiences where whether we knew it or not at the time, they created limitations in our beliefs about ourselves, others, and the world around us through the way we interpreted experiences that happened, right?
00:03:54.639 --> 00:03:57.280
And they began to shape how we believed, right?
00:03:57.360 --> 00:04:01.599
And those beliefs begin to shape how we behave and then the outcomes we get.
00:04:01.680 --> 00:04:07.520
And so I have to tell you, I lived a limited life for a very long time, not knowing it.
00:04:07.759 --> 00:04:12.719
And it really all began as I began to unpack the ceiling I was running into in my life.
00:04:12.879 --> 00:04:16.079
Like I couldn't break through some places, and it was costing me.
00:04:16.240 --> 00:04:22.959
And I was pressing in, trying to, why can't I seem to get to that, whatever that next level was for me at that time?
00:04:23.360 --> 00:04:25.199
And uh I started pressing in.
00:04:25.279 --> 00:04:29.040
I got a coach, I had some people really that were asking me really good questions.
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I think that's the powerful thing about coaching, is you get a good coach, they know how to ask good questions.
00:04:33.839 --> 00:04:44.240
Briefly, the the journey, the markers, what I discovered was that at six years old, I was raised by a single mom and a grandmother, right?
00:04:44.319 --> 00:04:47.279
And uh, they were awesome, they loved me, but it was hard.
00:04:47.439 --> 00:04:50.560
And I'm I know I don't look at Mo, but I'm in my 60s, okay?
00:04:50.639 --> 00:04:52.720
I'm doing my best to stay young.
00:04:53.040 --> 00:04:59.759
But in those days, being a single mom back in the 70s, right, early 70s, wasn't a popular thing.
00:04:59.839 --> 00:05:01.199
It wasn't a common thing.
00:05:01.360 --> 00:05:03.839
And my mom had to work several jobs to take care of me.
00:05:03.920 --> 00:05:07.120
And in that process, she had to get a babysitter, right?
00:05:07.199 --> 00:05:10.720
And a babysitter was going to watch me in the evenings because it was her second job.
00:05:10.800 --> 00:05:13.920
And mom trusted the babysitter, so I trusted the babysitter.
00:05:14.240 --> 00:05:20.319
And when the abuse began, right, and I don't mean to jump into a real dark place or a negative place because I look at it differently.
00:05:20.399 --> 00:05:21.439
It was, it was no good.
00:05:21.600 --> 00:05:23.759
There was nothing good about it, it wasn't positive.
00:05:23.920 --> 00:05:26.560
But as I look at my journey of my life, it marked me.
00:05:26.720 --> 00:05:28.879
And it began this journey for me.
00:05:28.959 --> 00:05:38.160
And that that abuse in that place caused me to view myself, others, and the world around me in a certain manner.
00:05:38.319 --> 00:05:43.439
And so then it caused me to then begin to act and behave in a way that was very self-protective, right?
00:05:43.519 --> 00:05:49.120
I would put myself out there, but really how I treated women throughout my life was very negative.
00:05:49.199 --> 00:05:51.519
It was, I'm not gonna let them get too close, all right.
00:05:51.680 --> 00:05:52.879
I'm gonna keep them at a distance.
00:05:53.040 --> 00:05:58.879
And then when they become a little overwhelming or feel like they're closing in, I'm gonna break it off and I'm gonna move away.
00:05:59.040 --> 00:06:01.920
Well, that worked until about 25 years old.
00:06:02.079 --> 00:06:09.120
So about 20, 20 years of my life, I was like, okay, and didn't even think about it until I met this woman of my dreams, man.
00:06:09.199 --> 00:06:11.040
She was the person I wanted to marry.
00:06:11.279 --> 00:06:15.519
And I remember getting ready to propose and the whole process.
00:06:15.920 --> 00:06:21.519
And in that process, I'm gonna propose to her that night, got it all worked out.
00:06:21.680 --> 00:06:23.519
We go to dinner, favorite restaurant.
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I proceed to make her so mad at me that she's done with me and she wants to end the relationship.
00:06:28.720 --> 00:06:32.000
And it was in that moment that I thought, what have I just done?
00:06:32.240 --> 00:06:33.199
Why did I do that?
00:06:33.360 --> 00:06:39.920
And it was like this flashback in me is like all the relationships I had done that with, but none of them had the impact that she did.
00:06:40.000 --> 00:06:41.759
And I thought, man, this is not okay.
00:06:42.000 --> 00:06:50.480
And what I realized in that process, we worked through it, we're good, we got married, we've been married for 37 years, two great kids, just had my first grandkids.
00:06:50.560 --> 00:06:51.839
So it all worked out well.
00:06:51.920 --> 00:06:55.279
But it was a it was a moment where I said, man, I can't run anymore.
00:06:55.439 --> 00:06:57.519
I got to face this thing that's hitting me.
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What is it that's this belief system that I have that's causing me to settle for something less than I was born and created for?
00:07:04.000 --> 00:07:14.160
And so when I dug into that and I had some good coaches and good people around me that helped me process, I realized that I had settled for a limited life.
00:07:14.480 --> 00:07:19.120
I had lived that way for so long, and I want everyone to hear this, it became normal.
00:07:19.360 --> 00:07:28.000
And my question as we go through this today is where in your life are you living a normal life that was never meant to be your normal?
00:07:28.319 --> 00:07:32.480
What if the normal you're accepting was never meant to be your normal?
00:07:32.560 --> 00:07:39.680
And so if it is, then you have settled for something less than you were born and created to do, an impact that you were created to have.
00:07:39.839 --> 00:07:41.759
And so sometimes we have to challenge normal.
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So that's what happened at 25 years old.
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I was challenging this normal.
00:07:45.519 --> 00:07:47.519
Like, oh my goodness, what am I doing?
00:07:47.600 --> 00:07:52.720
And I realized I had created a belief system that drove my behaviors.
00:07:52.800 --> 00:07:59.439
And we can get into that if you want, but I believe that all of our behaviors are driven by our beliefs, consciously and unconsciously.
00:07:59.600 --> 00:08:02.240
We can't act in a way contrary to what we believe.
00:08:02.399 --> 00:08:04.480
And then our behaviors produce our outcomes.
00:08:04.639 --> 00:08:08.879
And my outcomes was broken and damaged relationships for 20 years, right?
00:08:08.959 --> 00:08:10.240
And I just never saw it that way.
00:08:10.319 --> 00:08:11.600
I never saw it as a collective.
00:08:11.680 --> 00:08:13.279
It was just I was living my life.
00:08:13.439 --> 00:08:16.560
So, anyways, that would be the biggest marker that started me on this road.
00:08:16.639 --> 00:08:26.879
And I realized in that moment that began to develop over the next 25, 30 years to where I am today, of this idea that how many of us and what other areas of my life am I settling for something?
00:08:27.040 --> 00:08:30.639
If I put a ceiling on myself, and I was successful.
00:08:30.720 --> 00:08:35.360
I was president of the fraternity, basketball coach, basketball player in high school and college.
00:08:35.440 --> 00:08:38.559
So on the outside, I was very successful pursuing.
00:08:38.639 --> 00:08:42.960
But every time I was getting to that level of success, I'd run.
00:08:43.120 --> 00:08:44.159
I'd disconnect.
00:08:44.240 --> 00:08:50.559
I'd somehow sabotage myself so that I wouldn't have to prove that I actually could be who I was pretending to be.
00:08:50.720 --> 00:08:52.799
And I thought, man, I can't keep doing this anymore.
00:08:52.960 --> 00:08:55.039
In a nutshell, that was the biggest marker.
00:08:55.120 --> 00:08:57.759
And then I learned other areas that I had set up limitations.
00:08:58.000 --> 00:09:06.480
And I think for all of us, Mo, you could probably agree to this with your coaching, is we've got these limitations that we've set on ourselves that we don't even realize that are there.
00:09:06.720 --> 00:09:11.519
And until we can challenge those, we'll never see the potential for our lives.
00:09:11.600 --> 00:09:20.559
And we will settle for success instead of kind of things you talk about, instead of pushing past success to something greater, which I talk about as significance.
00:09:20.879 --> 00:09:34.080
That's what got me so motivated to help set other people free, to discover those limitations, and then walk into the greatness that I know that they were born and created to have and the impact in their people and the world around them.
00:09:34.960 --> 00:09:36.159
Rick, what an intro.
00:09:36.320 --> 00:09:39.840
So you mentioned that beliefs lead to behaviors.
00:09:40.399 --> 00:09:44.000
And most of these beliefs, they tend to be limiting beliefs.
00:09:44.240 --> 00:09:48.399
Where do these limiting beliefs come from and how do we recognize them?
00:09:48.799 --> 00:09:49.600
Great question.
00:09:49.759 --> 00:09:50.879
Two really good questions.
00:09:50.960 --> 00:09:54.480
And the second one I get a lot, like, I don't think I have any limiting beliefs.
00:09:54.559 --> 00:09:56.080
And I'm like, well, we all have them.
00:09:56.240 --> 00:09:57.840
So let's just put that on the table.
00:09:57.919 --> 00:09:59.919
We all have them somewhere, whether we know it or not.
00:10:00.000 --> 00:10:01.679
It's a part of our lives, right?
00:10:01.919 --> 00:10:06.080
So the trauma I went through, my limiting belief wasn't the trauma.
00:10:06.399 --> 00:10:14.240
My limiting belief was how I interpreted and perceived the trauma and what it meant about me, what I thought it said about me.
00:10:14.639 --> 00:10:21.600
So typically, our limiting beliefs come from places in our lives, experiences that we go through, good and bad, right?
00:10:21.679 --> 00:10:23.840
We can have limitless beliefs as well, right?
00:10:23.919 --> 00:10:26.320
When we have some of those, there's some areas we're just killing it.
00:10:26.559 --> 00:10:40.720
So it's really how we perceive experiences and then how we define them, and then we define ourselves, others, and the world around us based on our definition of that experience.
00:10:40.879 --> 00:10:42.559
So I was abused, right?
00:10:42.799 --> 00:10:45.039
Or and I couldn't talk to my mom, I couldn't tell anyone.
00:10:45.120 --> 00:10:47.759
So inside is a narrative that begins to play.
00:10:48.080 --> 00:10:52.000
Well, mom trusted the babysitter, I should trust the babysitter.
00:10:52.320 --> 00:10:59.600
So if this is happening and it doesn't feel right and I don't think it's okay, it must not be the babysitter because mom trusts her.
00:10:59.919 --> 00:11:01.919
It must be something about me.
00:11:02.080 --> 00:11:15.279
So the narrative I began to tell myself about this experience to protect myself, to understand the situation, began to shape my beliefs about me, my value, my worth.
00:11:15.600 --> 00:11:15.919
Right.
00:11:16.080 --> 00:11:20.720
And then I started to see others, especially women, females, in a certain way.
00:11:20.960 --> 00:11:22.399
All women want to.
00:11:22.799 --> 00:11:32.240
So I make these generalizations, again, inside, unconsciously in my narrative about women and the things that they desire and what their purpose is in my life.
00:11:32.399 --> 00:11:35.279
And then I superimpose that also on the world.
00:11:35.600 --> 00:11:37.759
Man, the world's not a safe place.
00:11:38.159 --> 00:11:40.080
The world just wants to.
00:11:40.720 --> 00:11:49.039
So how I interpreted my experience, the definition of it, how I saw myself in it, the narratives I told myself began to shape my beliefs.
00:11:49.200 --> 00:11:50.879
And some of those are limited.
00:11:51.039 --> 00:11:54.080
And then I could look at other situations where I was encouraged.
00:11:54.159 --> 00:11:55.200
You know, I was an athlete.
00:11:55.279 --> 00:11:56.320
So I was always encouraged.
00:11:56.399 --> 00:11:56.960
Man, you're good.
00:11:57.039 --> 00:12:00.799
You've got these skills, you're the best defensive player, you bring all this energy.
00:12:00.960 --> 00:12:01.679
I believe that.
00:12:01.759 --> 00:12:03.120
Like this is being poured into me.
00:12:03.200 --> 00:12:05.519
And so I excelled in that area.
00:12:05.600 --> 00:12:09.600
I believed I could do whatever I put my mind to in that area.
00:12:10.000 --> 00:12:11.679
To me, that's where that comes from.
00:12:11.759 --> 00:12:25.200
So we all have stories and narratives we told ourselves that created limitations or limitless beliefs that we then begin to act and support by our behavior that then began to produce this series of outcomes.
00:13:39.719 --> 00:13:45.079
So stories, beliefs, behaviors, outcomes.
00:13:45.319 --> 00:13:45.959
Yes, sir.
00:13:46.519 --> 00:13:48.919
How do we now iterate these?
00:13:49.079 --> 00:13:55.799
Because I'm assuming the behaviors we can attribute to worldview or perhaps identity pieces.
00:13:55.879 --> 00:13:58.120
Are they worldview pieces, identity pieces?
00:13:58.439 --> 00:14:02.360
And how can a coach help you iterate those behaviors?
00:14:02.519 --> 00:14:05.959
And we've mentioned a pathway to get to the behaviors already.
00:14:07.719 --> 00:14:10.679
It's really causing people to ask questions.
00:14:11.159 --> 00:14:20.839
When someone comes to me in coaching, right, or we get connected, not every connection is a fit because what I'm looking for is someone who's willing to challenge normal.
00:14:21.079 --> 00:14:26.919
They usually end up in front of me because they've hit a wall somewhere, either relationally or professionally or personally.
00:14:27.079 --> 00:14:32.759
They've tried to break through things, they've tried to do things, and they've been unsuccessful at moving to that next place.
00:14:33.079 --> 00:14:37.480
They may be a manager in a company and the CEO said, Hey, could you coach one of my members?
00:14:37.639 --> 00:14:43.240
I know they've got talent and ability and skills, but they just can't seem to move on to the next place.
00:14:43.480 --> 00:14:48.600
And so part of that is their willingness in the interview to say, Can we challenge?
00:14:48.759 --> 00:14:49.480
Can I challenge you?
00:14:49.639 --> 00:14:57.719
Are you open for me to challenge some of the things that you believe and why you believe them and what you think about them, the truths that you have?
00:14:57.879 --> 00:15:03.319
So the first thing is really getting them to allow the conversation to happen.
00:15:03.559 --> 00:15:04.759
We want to provoke that.
00:15:04.919 --> 00:15:11.959
And then helping them self-assess because they're like, well, I don't know if I have, I don't know what they are, I don't know where they're from, I don't know how to identify them.
00:15:12.120 --> 00:15:16.679
And so I ask them, I said, start listening, and this will happen for the people that are listening to us.
00:15:16.759 --> 00:15:21.319
For the next 24 to 36 hours, you're gonna hear this word that I'm gonna mention to you.
00:15:21.559 --> 00:15:27.719
Start looking for ways where you say, I can't, I'm not, I've never, I don't.
00:15:28.120 --> 00:15:31.159
Those statements, like when someone suggests something, hey, can you help me do?
00:15:31.399 --> 00:15:32.199
Would you build this?
00:15:32.360 --> 00:15:33.240
Can we go do this?
00:15:33.399 --> 00:15:47.159
And if your first response is, no, I've never really been good at that, or no, I really can't do this, or I've not XYZ, whatever it might be, those are tells that there may be a limiting belief behind it.
00:15:47.399 --> 00:15:50.279
I can't, I'm not, I'm never, I won't.
00:15:50.439 --> 00:15:51.719
So begin to pay attention.
00:15:51.799 --> 00:15:59.719
So all of the listeners, as you're talking to friends, as you're talking to coworkers, as you're working with employees or with your spouse or significant others, right?
00:15:59.799 --> 00:16:11.959
Whoever it is in your life, if you hear yourself, catch yourself saying, No, I can't do that, or no, I've never been able to do this, just pause for a minute and wonder what is it that you're saying you can't, you're not, you're never, or you won't about?
00:16:12.199 --> 00:16:15.319
And then be willing to ask yourself, is that really true?
00:16:15.799 --> 00:16:21.000
Here's the rub, Mo, because they'll go, Well, I've got story after story that validates its truth.
00:16:21.159 --> 00:16:22.120
That's what they'll tell me.
00:16:22.199 --> 00:16:27.719
Like, but yeah, I can say it's true because every time I try to do this, X, Y happens.
00:16:27.799 --> 00:16:28.759
I said, absolutely.
00:16:28.919 --> 00:16:34.120
It's like a self-fulfilling prophecy because you've already believed that it's going to happen before you even start.
00:16:34.279 --> 00:16:39.079
So you begin to move and act in a way subconsciously to reinforce the belief.
00:16:39.159 --> 00:16:49.799
And if the belief is I can't, I'm not, I'm never, I won't, your behaviors subconsciously will begin to move in that direction to make sure that you can't, you're not, you're never, or you won't.
00:16:50.199 --> 00:16:52.279
So pay attention to your language.
00:16:52.439 --> 00:16:59.719
The big one that I tell people to watch out for that has the typically anchored into a limiting belief is the word but.
00:17:00.759 --> 00:17:04.120
It's like when you say, hey, I'm looking for a new Cadillac.
00:17:04.279 --> 00:17:05.480
I can't wait for this car, right?
00:17:05.559 --> 00:17:07.799
A blue Cadillac, and all of a sudden you see it everywhere.
00:17:07.960 --> 00:17:11.480
So I'm just putting into everyone's subconscious right now the word but.
00:17:12.039 --> 00:17:19.559
When you hear yourself say, I can help you with this, but 90% of the time the word but negates everything before it.
00:17:19.720 --> 00:17:22.839
Actually, what you're saying is, I really don't believe everything I just said.
00:17:23.000 --> 00:17:25.079
Now let me tell you what I truly believe.
00:17:25.240 --> 00:17:35.079
Oh, I would love to help you, but I would love to build that, but I would love to pursue that program or put that team together or do this, but.
00:17:35.480 --> 00:17:38.839
And then everything you say after that is what you actually believe.
00:17:38.920 --> 00:17:45.240
It's the excuses and justification you make for why you're not going to do what it is you said you'd love to do.
00:17:45.480 --> 00:17:52.680
So, but is a great way to identify potential limiting beliefs that you have in your life personally or professionally.
00:17:52.920 --> 00:17:58.279
The other side of that is but is also a very good word because it allows you to negate the negative.
00:17:58.600 --> 00:17:59.880
Man, I can't do this.
00:18:00.039 --> 00:18:07.400
I've never been able to do this, but I'm going to, and now you're telling yourself, I've never done this, but I'm going to do it.
00:18:07.559 --> 00:18:12.519
So you move yourself away from that negative belief that you have.
00:18:12.680 --> 00:18:15.640
That's kind of the process and how I help people identify it.
00:18:15.800 --> 00:18:19.160
And once we can identify it, then we can begin to work through it.
00:18:19.480 --> 00:18:26.279
I don't know if that answers what you were asking or not, Mo, but that's that's kind of the process and how I help people identify it.
00:18:26.440 --> 00:18:29.320
And once we can identify it, then we can begin to work through it.
00:18:29.480 --> 00:18:32.600
Is that did that kind of answer what you were asking?
00:18:33.720 --> 00:18:34.200
Absolutely.
00:18:34.360 --> 00:18:37.560
There's that phrase of be good to yourself when you talk to yourself.
00:18:37.640 --> 00:18:53.560
And this is that next level where you're feeding intentionally your subconscious mind, erasing the butt and erasing the negative and speaking in more captivating language to now feed forward your conscious mind.
00:18:53.640 --> 00:18:55.480
So that answers for sure.
00:18:55.800 --> 00:18:57.160
Let's go back in time.
00:18:57.480 --> 00:19:05.000
When you think back to the early part of your life and your career, how did you personally define success?
00:19:05.320 --> 00:19:07.480
And where did that definition come from?
00:19:07.720 --> 00:19:08.600
Yeah, absolutely.
00:19:08.759 --> 00:19:09.640
That's a great question.
00:19:09.720 --> 00:19:18.600
And I love your work in this as well, because you talk about the difference between success and sustainable growth and the transformation that we're looking for.
00:19:18.759 --> 00:19:21.000
And you know, I think success is a powerful thing.
00:19:21.080 --> 00:19:25.480
And I think it's something we all have been wired into our DNA.
00:19:25.640 --> 00:19:26.920
Be successful, right?
00:19:27.080 --> 00:19:29.320
And then we have to go, what does that look like?
00:19:29.560 --> 00:19:31.720
Am I building my success based on Mo?
00:19:32.200 --> 00:19:35.000
Like if I get to where Mo is, I'm successful.
00:19:35.160 --> 00:19:40.600
If I can have worked for Tony Robbins and if I can have coached 100,000 people, you know, that success.
00:19:40.759 --> 00:19:44.840
Well, so we have to look first at is how are we defining success?
00:19:45.000 --> 00:19:46.759
What does success mean to me?
00:19:46.920 --> 00:19:47.960
What does it mean to you?
00:19:48.040 --> 00:19:49.320
They have to be unique.
00:19:49.560 --> 00:19:51.640
And so then I think that's an important thing.
00:19:51.800 --> 00:19:54.200
We should all seek to be successful.
00:19:54.600 --> 00:19:58.600
But what I learned in the process is success is still a limitation.
00:19:58.920 --> 00:20:00.600
Success is still less than.
00:20:00.759 --> 00:20:05.640
It's good, and we should pursue success, but success is all about me.
00:20:05.880 --> 00:20:10.120
It's about what I can do and my achievement and what I'm capable of.
00:20:10.360 --> 00:20:12.440
And success is I learn through it.
00:20:12.519 --> 00:20:15.640
Like I was a successful basketball player until I wasn't.
00:20:15.880 --> 00:20:16.200
Right.
00:20:16.279 --> 00:20:17.160
I I was good.
00:20:17.240 --> 00:20:18.279
I could play at high school.
00:20:18.360 --> 00:20:19.080
I played at college.
00:20:19.240 --> 00:20:20.680
I tried to play overseas a little bit.
00:20:20.759 --> 00:20:27.480
And then I realized no matter how much I self-talk myself, I just don't have the skill set to be at that next level.
00:20:27.640 --> 00:20:29.720
But I was successful, right?
00:20:30.040 --> 00:20:34.440
But when I stopped playing basketball, did I stop being successful?
00:20:35.000 --> 00:20:36.759
Was I no longer a success?
00:20:37.560 --> 00:20:42.680
Is success just conditioned upon my ability to achieve something in an area of my life?
00:20:42.759 --> 00:20:45.640
And then when I can't achieve it, I I stop being successful.
00:20:45.960 --> 00:20:47.080
That's kind of how we live.
00:20:47.320 --> 00:20:49.880
So we're always chasing the next success.
00:20:50.840 --> 00:20:53.400
So what I realized is success is important.
00:20:53.560 --> 00:20:56.200
We must pursue success, but it's less than.
00:20:56.600 --> 00:21:00.600
The difference is, I believe, we should pursue a significant life.
00:21:00.920 --> 00:21:04.680
Significance is not about me, it's about we.
00:21:05.000 --> 00:21:08.120
It's about the legacy that's left after I'm gone.
00:21:08.200 --> 00:21:11.320
It's the ripple that the pebble has in a pond.
00:21:11.640 --> 00:21:28.840
Significance is that ripple that keeps moving out because I see the life and what I'm doing, not from the lens of what it can do for me, but what can I offer, provide, what do I have to give to others and the world around me that is greater than me?
00:21:29.000 --> 00:21:36.759
And I think that is in our core nature, I believe, whether we've identified it or not, for me, that's where fulfillment comes.
00:21:36.920 --> 00:21:40.840
I want to be successful, but I want to live a significant life.
00:21:41.080 --> 00:21:44.200
And to live a significant life, it's a different mindset.
00:21:44.440 --> 00:21:58.600
I have to find humility, not weakness, not less than, but humility that allows me to be all that I am, but not lead with that so that I can be all I can be for the people and the world around me.
00:21:58.759 --> 00:22:00.840
It's that thing that I can leave.
00:22:01.000 --> 00:22:05.480
It's the story that my children tell when I'm long gone when someone says, I heard about your dad.
00:22:05.640 --> 00:23:20.520
Or for Mo, like, man, I heard about this Mo guy, man.
00:23:20.600 --> 00:23:21.080
He was awesome.
00:23:21.160 --> 00:23:22.600
Can you tell me about him?
00:23:22.840 --> 00:23:28.840
You don't want him to say, oh, he had a huge podcast and drove a cool car and worked with Tony Robbins.
00:23:28.920 --> 00:23:29.960
That's not what we want him to say.
00:23:30.120 --> 00:23:33.880
What we'd like people to say is, man, he changed my life.
00:23:34.120 --> 00:23:35.160
He encouraged me.
00:23:35.240 --> 00:23:36.360
He always lifted me up.
00:23:36.520 --> 00:23:38.200
He spoke into my future.
00:23:38.360 --> 00:23:50.040
He helped me break through these limitations to where I could be not just successful, but that's the narrative I would love the world to tell about when they encountered Rick, what was the experience?
00:23:50.200 --> 00:23:52.120
That's a significant life.
00:23:52.280 --> 00:24:00.360
And I think that should be for me and people I work with, that's the transition that I want to see people move through.
00:24:00.680 --> 00:24:01.560
Does that help?
00:24:01.720 --> 00:24:05.080
Is that kind of that really helps?
00:24:05.400 --> 00:24:08.840
And that frame of significance.
00:24:10.120 --> 00:24:11.560
I want to ask as well, Rick.
00:24:11.960 --> 00:24:13.400
You know, we all have our journeys.
00:24:13.800 --> 00:24:22.760
Before your message formed around living limitless, and I I love that concept by the way what version of yourself were you operating from internally?
00:24:23.720 --> 00:24:30.040
Before that message fully solidified of living, limitless exclamation mark.
00:24:30.360 --> 00:24:30.840
Yeah.
00:24:31.080 --> 00:24:34.360
I think we are and we are not yet.
00:24:35.000 --> 00:24:43.000
You already are successful, you are living a significant, you are good, you are achieving, and we're not yet.
00:24:43.160 --> 00:24:46.440
There is that thing that we are hopefully constantly becoming.
00:24:46.600 --> 00:24:50.840
I want to believe that I can continually grow and learn and become, right?
00:24:51.000 --> 00:25:05.560
So that version of where I was is still, there's remnants of that that I work through my entire life as I become the next version, like used to that better version of my world, my geography, my you know, sphere of influence, right?
00:25:05.720 --> 00:25:15.000
And so the person I was, and I think again, we use this, and sometimes the words get used too much and we lose the meaning, but that imposter syndrome kind of idea, right?
00:25:15.080 --> 00:25:17.160
I, you know, again, it gets used a lot.
00:25:17.400 --> 00:25:19.320
Oh, and I don't have it, or I do have it.
00:25:19.400 --> 00:25:30.680
Or so if I was going to clean it up and say, you know, there is a version that I saw myself when I looked in the mirror that was successful and encouraging and like strong and confident.
00:25:30.840 --> 00:25:43.000
And right behind that, that dual person was someone who was afraid and timid and would overcompensate and always feel he had to prove himself to be that next thing.
00:25:43.240 --> 00:25:50.920
I was building, I was a coach and I was a pastor for a while, and before I got into what I'm doing the last 20 years, and I have two adopted children.
00:25:51.000 --> 00:25:54.280
So is it okay if I share a quick story about this?
00:25:54.600 --> 00:25:55.240
Let's do it.
00:25:55.320 --> 00:25:56.280
Let's do it.
00:25:56.600 --> 00:25:59.080
I have two adopted children from birth.
00:25:59.400 --> 00:26:02.520
Amazing stories in themselves, and uh such a blessing.
00:26:02.680 --> 00:26:12.040
My son's now 31, my daughter's 28, she just had our first granddaughter, but they had some very difficult seasons of their life, extremely challenging.
00:26:12.120 --> 00:26:14.200
It caused us to have to make changes in our life.
00:26:14.360 --> 00:26:20.360
I was building a church, I had a commercial cleaning company, I had a coffee shop, entrepreneurial stuff.
00:26:20.440 --> 00:26:27.480
We were building things, and then my son hit a wall, and that wall was devastating, and he became suicidal.
00:26:27.640 --> 00:26:31.800
And so we went through seven various attempts at suicide.
00:26:31.960 --> 00:26:39.800
And so we had to make some serious life decisions in our home about how to make sure he lived, literally, was going to live.
00:26:39.880 --> 00:26:40.680
And how do we do that?
00:26:40.840 --> 00:26:47.320
My wife had a great job, worked for her dad, vice president of a company, was the primary financial part of our family.
00:26:47.400 --> 00:26:49.000
And I was building and doing things.
00:26:49.160 --> 00:27:01.240
And so when we made the decision, long story short, I decided I was gonna step away from everything, stop the commercial cleaning, the coffee shop, the pastoring, the church, and I was gonna be a stay-at-home dad because I was an educator at first.
00:27:01.320 --> 00:27:02.440
I was a school teacher.
00:27:02.600 --> 00:27:06.600
So I'm gonna be a stay-at-home dad and be there for my son and work on that.
00:27:06.840 --> 00:27:08.040
My wife was gonna keep working.
00:27:08.280 --> 00:27:27.000
Well, that period of time, and then my daughter went through some issues, was about a 15-year window where I stopped building, growing, doing, and that was in my 30s, mid-30s to mid-40s, and I became a dad, and that was my job to take care of my family.
00:27:27.080 --> 00:27:31.240
And I volunteered and started some nonprofits, but I let all the growth go.
00:27:31.480 --> 00:27:37.960
So when my kids got healthy, again, long story short, but when my kids got healthy, I started asking, what do I do now?
00:27:38.440 --> 00:27:39.880
What does life look like now?
00:27:40.040 --> 00:27:41.080
I need to go produce.
00:27:41.160 --> 00:27:46.360
I had it in me to build, and I was building, and I was building in trajectory of growth.
00:27:46.520 --> 00:27:52.680
Well, now when I was coming back into it at almost 50 years old, I'm like, well, I don't have any experience.
00:27:52.760 --> 00:27:54.280
I've lost 15 years in the workplace.
00:27:54.360 --> 00:28:00.280
So now my self-confidence, my energy, my motivation internally, externally, I was still this confident.
00:28:00.360 --> 00:28:01.720
Look at me, I'm gonna go build.
00:28:01.880 --> 00:28:08.760
But every time I went to an executive or I went to the Chamber of Commerce here in the United States to work with them, inside I'm dying.
00:28:09.000 --> 00:28:11.320
There was a view of myself that said, Why am I here?
00:28:11.400 --> 00:28:12.760
And why would they listen to me?
00:28:12.920 --> 00:28:14.840
And I've been a dad.
00:28:15.080 --> 00:28:16.360
That's been what's your job?
00:28:16.520 --> 00:28:18.280
I was a dad for 15 years.
00:28:18.440 --> 00:28:20.360
Yes, it was the most important thing I could have done.
00:28:20.440 --> 00:28:23.080
I would do it all again, but the world doesn't see that.
00:28:23.320 --> 00:28:28.200
They, you know, my perception was they had this view of me that was less than.
00:28:28.280 --> 00:28:29.640
Why would they want me to coach them?
00:28:29.720 --> 00:28:31.720
Why would they want me to do leadership with them?
00:28:31.880 --> 00:28:35.800
Why would they want any of that when my experience has been sitting at home with my kids?
00:28:35.960 --> 00:28:37.160
That was the narrative.
00:28:37.400 --> 00:28:43.960
So that has still been a part of my journey as I built and I and I wrote the book and I was moving through this.
00:28:44.120 --> 00:28:54.040
It's been this constant maturing and evolution of my own looking in the mirror and declaring over my life, and I I wear a bracelet, it's on my shirt, I will, I can, I am.
00:28:54.120 --> 00:28:56.520
I started changing my conversation.
00:28:56.840 --> 00:29:00.680
Man, I will be a coach, a successful coach, a significant coach.
00:29:00.840 --> 00:29:02.920
I can lead leaders.
00:29:03.400 --> 00:29:07.960
I am a leader, I am a coach, I am significant.
00:29:08.360 --> 00:29:13.880
I had to start changing that narrative because the person inside wasn't aligning with what I was showing up outside.
00:29:13.960 --> 00:29:16.840
And the truth is, we all know this, eventually those worlds collide.
00:29:17.000 --> 00:29:23.000
And that world inside is going to show up on the outside, and people are going to either feel it, see it, sense it, or know it.
00:29:23.240 --> 00:29:25.640
And I had to bring alignment and congruity.
00:29:25.880 --> 00:29:28.520
And so that was who I was.
00:29:29.080 --> 00:29:31.720
And I kept realizing I can't break through to the next level.
00:29:31.880 --> 00:29:41.400
I can't really do what I desire to do if I don't deal with the person inside here that says you're you're less than and you don't deserve to be where you are.
00:29:42.120 --> 00:29:43.160
And I'm still there.
00:29:43.240 --> 00:29:47.800
There's still areas I get with you and I'm like, man, what am I doing with Mo?
00:29:48.200 --> 00:29:51.880
Man, his story and his journey and who he's been with and all this he's done.
00:29:51.960 --> 00:29:57.800
And I look at the people that you've interviewed, you know, Lee, the Lee Jackson, the last guy, I was like, man, I can't compete with him.
00:29:57.880 --> 00:29:58.600
I'm not there.
00:29:58.840 --> 00:30:00.360
John Gallagher, who we both know.
00:30:00.440 --> 00:30:02.280
I was like, well, John's really doing a great job.
00:30:02.440 --> 00:30:05.240
And his story, and I'm like, and I have to stop myself.
00:30:05.400 --> 00:30:06.360
It's like, time out.
00:30:06.520 --> 00:30:07.560
I am not them.
00:30:08.200 --> 00:30:08.920
I am me.
00:30:09.000 --> 00:30:11.960
What is the and you said this, what's the best version of me?
00:30:13.240 --> 00:30:15.080
What have I been gifted and called to do?
00:30:15.240 --> 00:30:16.360
What is my gift to Mo?
00:30:16.600 --> 00:30:17.640
What is my gift to the world?
00:30:17.800 --> 00:30:24.920
Not from a pride place, but if I don't discover it, find it, and get confident in it, then I am shorting the world of me.
00:30:25.080 --> 00:30:31.320
And I know that sounds prideful, but I would tell everyone the world is going to miss something if you don't show up in your best self.
00:30:31.560 --> 00:30:39.960
The world will lack something, your family will lack something, your friends, your business will miss something that you own that only you can give them.
00:30:40.520 --> 00:30:52.840
So until you believe you're worthy of that, you have value of that, that that is who you are, and the world needs you, you're going to keep holding back, reserving the greatest part of you.
00:30:53.000 --> 00:30:54.760
And the world needs that.
00:30:55.800 --> 00:31:01.320
I mean this is really great.
00:31:01.640 --> 00:31:07.240
Again, feeding the subconscious to serve the conscious mind.
00:31:08.120 --> 00:31:16.280
I want to give a huge debt of gratitude to the people that were in that position you mentioned or are in that position.
00:31:16.600 --> 00:31:28.360
I'm talking about parents right now, because a lot of times you have parents who've dedicated their life and done it properly to raising the next generation.
00:31:28.760 --> 00:31:41.800
And as you mentioned, a lot of times the outcome of that is I'm just uh, you know, there's a moment when they want to pursue their own thing, their own way, and I'm just uh fill in the blank.
00:31:41.960 --> 00:31:52.200
I'm just uh okay, so you're you're out in the I will, I can, I am mindset and philosophy, and you've come from being just a parent.
00:31:52.520 --> 00:32:04.360
And my question to you is are there transferable skills that the parent doesn't see from being just a parent that are incredibly useful when they go out into the big wide world?
00:32:04.600 --> 00:32:07.160
Well, we could do a whole podcast just on this, Mo.
00:32:07.400 --> 00:32:16.520
I mean, this is so important because no one, we are never just a first thing is we got to get that out of the vocabulary.
00:32:16.600 --> 00:32:17.240
And it's so true.
00:32:17.320 --> 00:32:19.480
Well, I'm I was just a I was just a coach.
00:32:19.640 --> 00:32:20.920
I was just a dad.
00:32:21.240 --> 00:32:22.040
Time out.
00:32:22.360 --> 00:32:24.360
When I hear people say that, I'm like, no, no, no, no.
00:32:24.600 --> 00:32:25.800
You are never just a.
00:32:25.960 --> 00:32:27.160
You are a dad.
00:32:27.320 --> 00:32:28.440
You are a coach.
00:32:28.600 --> 00:32:30.680
You are a friend, you are a husband.
00:32:30.840 --> 00:32:34.520
So that's the first thing is own the greatness of that.
00:32:34.760 --> 00:32:36.280
What's transferable?
00:32:36.680 --> 00:32:37.640
Everything.
00:32:38.280 --> 00:32:44.680
Because the first thing we've got to understand is the development and the growth of the human, of the person.
00:32:45.080 --> 00:32:48.440
Everything in life is personal before it's corporate.
00:32:48.920 --> 00:32:56.120
You are limited to what you can do corporate-wise, based on the limitations you believe or put on yourself personally.
00:32:56.360 --> 00:33:02.520
So when you think about being a parent, think about being a leader, a manager, a and I and I look at leadership different, right?
00:33:02.600 --> 00:33:08.840
So leadership, we typically talk about as a position, a title, a paycheck, a corner office, a car, and it is authority.
00:33:09.000 --> 00:33:10.280
But it's not first that.
00:33:10.360 --> 00:33:11.960
And I've been mentored by John Maxwell.
00:33:12.120 --> 00:33:14.040
I've been blessed to be in his world for a long time.
00:33:14.120 --> 00:33:17.720
And he talks about leadership as influence, nothing more, nothing less.
00:33:17.800 --> 00:33:27.960
And I really have built on that saying everyone is a leader because I do believe at its core, leadership is a posture, not a program, not a position.
00:33:28.120 --> 00:33:35.640
It's a posture that we take because when we come into a space, when I enter into a room, I bring my presence there.
00:33:35.800 --> 00:33:40.360
And when my presence shows up, it impacts that space, positively or negatively.
00:33:40.680 --> 00:33:41.240
People notice it.
00:33:41.320 --> 00:33:42.600
I don't have to say a word.
00:33:42.920 --> 00:33:45.640
We all influence space when we show up.
00:33:45.800 --> 00:33:50.520
And so leadership is our ability to influence by showing up and how we show up.
00:33:50.600 --> 00:33:51.400
So let me say that.
00:33:51.560 --> 00:33:59.080
So if that's true, then when we are raising people, my goal in leadership development is leaders raising leaders based on that definition.
00:33:59.240 --> 00:34:00.360
So let's be a parent.
00:34:00.600 --> 00:34:02.520
A parent implies I have a child.
00:34:02.680 --> 00:34:11.000
A child is someone who is starting out impressionable that one day will be on their own and be a parent and trying to influence and impact the world around them.
00:34:11.079 --> 00:34:16.840
So, what's the greatest gift I can give them is raise them up to be people of positive influence and impact.
00:34:17.000 --> 00:34:18.039
How do I do that?
00:34:18.200 --> 00:34:21.800
I help them with their mindset, their declarations, their beliefs.
00:34:21.880 --> 00:34:23.400
How do they fail well?
00:34:23.880 --> 00:34:24.119
Right?
00:34:24.280 --> 00:34:26.440
How do you fall forward and get back up?
00:34:26.599 --> 00:34:29.480
How do you deal with the things of life that are unexpected?
00:34:29.720 --> 00:34:37.720
Every skill set as a parent needs to successfully raise a child is the skill set we need as leaders to raise up industry, people.
00:34:37.960 --> 00:34:43.400
It all begins personally before it can ever be successful corporately.
00:34:43.639 --> 00:34:47.559
But we skip the personal to go build the corporate.
00:34:47.800 --> 00:34:51.159
And when we do that, we're building on shifting sand.
00:34:51.240 --> 00:34:54.440
And eventually what we built is going to collapse or not sustain.
00:34:54.519 --> 00:34:57.480
And then it's when I'm gone, what I built is gone.
00:34:57.720 --> 00:34:59.639
I don't want that to be my truth.
00:34:59.800 --> 00:35:01.960
I don't want to be my kids' truth.
00:35:02.519 --> 00:35:18.760
So everything about what you just said, everything we do as a parent or as a husband, the way we empower our spouse, my my spouse, or as a significant other in our lives, how I speak life into them, how I handle conflict, don't just walk away and quit.
00:35:18.920 --> 00:35:19.960
I've done my part.
00:35:20.119 --> 00:35:21.319
She needs to do her part.
00:35:21.879 --> 00:35:24.439
I've done all I can and we quit and we walk away.
00:35:24.759 --> 00:35:30.039
No, no, it's we we we can't be that casual with this.
00:35:30.119 --> 00:35:31.239
This is where life happens.
00:35:31.319 --> 00:35:38.359
A good friend of mine in coaching said when you're working with people and you're going through hard things, don't steal the struggle.
00:35:39.239 --> 00:35:40.759
Don't steal the struggle.
00:35:40.919 --> 00:35:48.119
The struggle's where growth happens, the struggle's where life change happens, the struggle is where awareness and realization can happen.
00:35:48.199 --> 00:35:49.159
It's not guaranteed.
00:35:49.239 --> 00:35:51.159
You've got to be willing to go through it.
00:35:51.399 --> 00:35:52.679
I've got a lot of words.
00:35:52.839 --> 00:35:57.559
My kids put a this a governor, we call them governors, like speed limit things on buses.
00:35:57.639 --> 00:36:01.079
I, you know, and cars, you could only go so fast and then it would shut you down.
00:36:01.239 --> 00:36:03.480
My kids said, I need a word governor on my life.
00:36:03.559 --> 00:36:07.000
Like, dad, when you hit your word limit, you can't talk anymore during the day.
00:36:07.239 --> 00:36:17.960
So I know I use a lot of words, but but I say that to help us understand the repetition of it, that there isn't a thing that we do that doesn't translate into the world.
00:36:18.199 --> 00:36:34.919
If we first focus on the development of self and then the empowerment and development of others to believe, to see themselves as they were created, born, and destined to be, not as they see themselves, but with the greatness that's in them.
00:36:36.439 --> 00:36:37.959
Our words are powerful, Mo.
00:36:38.199 --> 00:36:48.999
I mean, our words to lift and to and to empower and to equip and to propel are powerful and just as powerful to tear down and destroy and corrupt and kill.
00:36:50.119 --> 00:36:55.639
There's a verse I love in Proverbs that says, There's power in the tongue to give life or take life.
00:36:55.879 --> 00:36:59.159
And in some translations it says, you choose.
00:37:00.599 --> 00:37:01.959
It's my choice.
00:37:02.839 --> 00:37:04.039
It's always a choice, yeah.
00:37:04.359 --> 00:37:12.359
It's my choice to speak words of life over myself or others that give life, or I can speak words of death over myself and others.
00:37:12.679 --> 00:37:16.919
But the power in that tongue of what comes out and I speak is so important.
00:37:18.919 --> 00:37:26.919
It is such a an empowering message for wives, husbands, mothers, fathers.
00:37:27.079 --> 00:37:29.399
So uh thanks for your words on that.
00:37:30.359 --> 00:37:33.319
The likelihood, Rick, is this is going to be a double episode.
00:37:33.479 --> 00:37:39.799
So um, you know, um Rory says there's no such thing as too long, there's only too boring.
00:37:40.119 --> 00:37:43.479
And the words you're using, these are powerful, you know.
00:37:44.119 --> 00:37:45.639
There's no word wastage here.
00:37:45.719 --> 00:37:48.199
Like these are powerful words, powerful sentiments.
00:37:48.919 --> 00:37:50.119
So that's all fine.
00:37:50.279 --> 00:38:03.159
And pretty early, I thought, oh, this will be our first ever in the history of this podcast double episode because the words you're sharing are gold, and the wisdom you're sharing is just gold, frankincense, and myrrh.
00:38:03.479 --> 00:38:04.279
There you go.
00:38:04.599 --> 00:38:14.439
And Rick, during your journey, was there a point where you thought achieving more didn't feel like becoming more?
00:38:14.679 --> 00:38:16.919
And what did that disconnect feel like?
00:38:17.239 --> 00:38:25.239
It's basically where you're getting the double your revenues and you're achieving more success.
00:38:25.399 --> 00:38:31.239
And you mentioned cars earlier and the bigger house, and just getting more stuff, as I call it.
00:38:31.399 --> 00:38:35.319
Was there a point where getting more stuff didn't feel like more?
00:38:36.919 --> 00:38:37.559
Yes.
00:38:38.679 --> 00:38:47.639
I've been fortunate in my journey a little bit, I guess, in one way, is that stuff was never something I pursued, right?
00:38:47.719 --> 00:38:53.079
I mean, I have desires and home and cars and things like that, but it it never drove me.
00:38:53.399 --> 00:38:58.599
So it wasn't this revelation of I've got all this thing, but I still feel empty.
00:38:58.679 --> 00:39:07.159
But it's a lot of people I work with, especially in the professional world, the CEOs, the entrepreneurs, it's like they're building and collecting and accumulating.
00:39:07.879 --> 00:39:12.999
Typically, if you go back to the source of what that's about, Mo, and you know this because this is the work you do.
00:39:13.559 --> 00:39:19.399
It's typically trying to find identity, value, and worth in something outside of ourselves.
00:39:19.639 --> 00:39:30.519
And until we recognize that, no matter how much I try to build and find and define from the world outside, there's a point where you just keep feeling it just doesn't fill the hole.
00:39:31.079 --> 00:39:35.879
It's interesting, Blaise Pascal, he was a mathematician, and he talked about this thing.
00:39:35.959 --> 00:39:38.519
And I don't know about his faith or if he was a faith person.
00:39:38.679 --> 00:39:42.199
I don't know about everyone's faith, and I'm not trying to put that on people, but he had a perspective.
00:39:42.279 --> 00:39:50.199
And he said he believed that humans were designed and created with what he called a god hole inside of them.
00:39:50.439 --> 00:39:54.919
And that god hole, they spend their whole life trying to fill.
00:39:55.479 --> 00:40:06.119
And it's the whole desires, it's got legitimate needs value, worth, belonging, love, identity are all the things that we want to use to fill that hole.
00:40:06.919 --> 00:40:12.439
Those are legitimate needs and desires, the stuff in the world, the recognition, they're legitimate.
00:40:12.519 --> 00:40:13.479
They're not illegitimate.
00:40:13.559 --> 00:40:16.039
They're okay to desire that, to want that.
00:40:16.439 --> 00:40:20.919
But we try to fill this hole in us through illegitimate means.
00:40:21.079 --> 00:40:30.199
It's a legitimate need and desire, but it's in illegitimate ways, thinking something in the world is going to fill this void that I feel.
00:40:30.439 --> 00:40:34.039
And the problem is we keep stuffing things in there and it's never enough.
00:40:34.199 --> 00:40:37.959
And it never feels full, and we never feel satisfied, and we don't understand it.
00:40:38.119 --> 00:40:48.519
His thought was until we fill the hole with the one who is designed to fill it, with the one who created the hole, we will never feel like we're enough.
00:40:48.599 --> 00:40:50.199
We will never find our identity.
00:40:50.359 --> 00:41:02.279
So if I was going to just translate that into our own journey, it's that place where the hole inside of us that we're trying to fill is legitimate, the needs that we have to value, worth, identity.
00:41:02.439 --> 00:41:06.919
But they're not found in our activity and the outside workings.
00:41:07.159 --> 00:41:12.519
They're found internally in our createdness, in our in just who we are.
00:41:12.839 --> 00:41:20.759
You are already good, you are already perfect, you are already worthy, you are already valuable.
00:41:21.159 --> 00:41:24.279
I'm just having to turn my belief system.
00:41:24.359 --> 00:41:32.839
I'm either going to believe the world, and we can go down a whole nother path that is against me, and we get filled, the phone, the thing, everything, the world is saying, hey, you're not good enough.
00:41:32.919 --> 00:41:35.399
You should be like this, you should look like this, you should do this.
00:41:35.639 --> 00:41:42.279
So now we're racing after this world's view of identity, value, and worth that is not for us.
00:41:42.439 --> 00:41:45.399
It's actually meant to kill, steal, and destroy our lives.
00:41:45.639 --> 00:41:47.239
It is not our friend.
00:41:47.479 --> 00:41:52.279
But we find ourselves agreeing with it and aligning with it and living chasing it.
00:41:52.519 --> 00:41:55.319
Or we can agree with our createdness.
00:41:55.399 --> 00:41:56.679
And for me, I'm a faith person.
00:41:56.759 --> 00:41:59.799
So I go with the one who created me who said, I already am these things.
00:41:59.879 --> 00:42:01.239
So who am I going to agree with?
00:42:01.399 --> 00:42:05.639
One that's for me for life, a future and a hope, or a world that's against me.
00:42:05.799 --> 00:42:12.919
And when I realign that structure to whatever that is in me that isn't the world, that hole begins to get filled.
00:42:12.999 --> 00:42:15.239
Now my identity, value, and worth is secure.
00:42:15.399 --> 00:42:20.999
And no matter what you say or do, or my achievement or success or failure doesn't get to mess with that.
00:42:21.239 --> 00:42:22.679
It's already set.
00:42:23.159 --> 00:42:24.359
I can stand secure.
00:42:24.439 --> 00:42:29.079
I'm less offended by things because the world doesn't revolve around me.
00:42:29.319 --> 00:42:31.559
It impacts me, but it's not about me.
00:42:31.719 --> 00:42:34.679
And so I can stand in a place of security and confidence.
00:42:34.759 --> 00:42:41.959
And then when I go try to get it, achieve, build, grow, do all that, man, I'm building it from a foundation of solid rock.
00:42:42.199 --> 00:42:46.999
And now the sky's the limit because it's not dependent on something out here in the world.
00:42:47.159 --> 00:42:51.319
They can't see us, but the the external, it's now built upon something internal.
00:42:51.399 --> 00:42:54.279
It says, I can, I will, and I am.
00:42:54.439 --> 00:43:00.119
The last thing I'll say about that, Mo is the why I chose those three words, really important.
00:43:00.919 --> 00:43:03.479
I start with I will, I can, and I am.
00:43:03.559 --> 00:43:04.519
I start with I will.
00:43:04.759 --> 00:43:06.839
I will is a statement of intention.
00:43:07.239 --> 00:43:10.119
We're telling our subconscious, I will do something.
00:43:10.279 --> 00:43:11.079
So we're getting ready.
00:43:11.159 --> 00:43:14.839
We're subconscious, hey, boss said we're gonna do this, we will do this.
00:43:14.919 --> 00:43:17.959
So now I'm all right, I will a statement of intention.
00:43:18.199 --> 00:43:20.519
I can is a statement of ability.
00:43:20.759 --> 00:43:23.239
I have the ability, I can do this.
00:43:23.639 --> 00:43:28.679
Most powerful declaration we can make is I am, because it's a statement of identity.
00:43:29.079 --> 00:43:31.319
I am telling myself, I am this.
00:43:32.119 --> 00:43:40.119
I am a builder, an executive, I am a business owner, I am successful, I am a father, I am a mother, I am a friend.
00:43:40.439 --> 00:43:41.319
It's identity.
00:43:41.479 --> 00:43:46.999
And when we can declare positive identity over ourselves, we will begin to live in that reality.
00:43:47.079 --> 00:43:49.399
And it changes everything.
00:43:52.519 --> 00:43:57.159
I appreciate the opportunity to share that, but that's to me, that's the core of it all.
00:43:59.639 --> 00:44:07.239
Was there a less than positive identity that you'd been building life on prior to discovering?
00:44:07.559 --> 00:44:08.359
Well, 100%.
00:44:09.079 --> 00:44:12.999
Um, I mean, it goes back to single mom, right?
00:44:13.159 --> 00:44:15.319
Being raised in a time when that wasn't part of it.
00:44:15.399 --> 00:44:19.479
I my uncle was the only male in my life, and he was a full-on hippie.
00:44:19.639 --> 00:44:21.879
I mean, Harley Davidson, long hair.
00:44:22.039 --> 00:44:26.039
People said he looked like Jesus, had the whole beard, you know, and I didn't grow up a person of faith.
00:44:26.119 --> 00:44:29.959
I don't, you know, I keep bringing that in there, but that's just been part of my story, my journey.
00:44:30.119 --> 00:44:36.119
But I mean, they lived in the basement, and everything the hippies did that was part of their world, but that was in my world, right?
00:44:36.199 --> 00:44:41.159
And so that was shaping my views, shaping my life, shaping how I saw the world.
00:44:41.319 --> 00:44:51.559
Um, and so all of that impacted how I saw myself, how I viewed myself, my value, my worth.
00:44:52.279 --> 00:45:00.039
And those are all things that I had to at some point face and recognize how I interpreted those things.
00:45:00.199 --> 00:45:05.799
Did I interpret them in a way that was true, or did I was uh believing a lie about those things?
00:45:06.279 --> 00:45:12.039
And I realized in the majority of those places, my beliefs around the experiences were lies.
00:45:12.679 --> 00:45:17.479
And so then I realized I built my life and behaviors off of lies.
00:45:17.719 --> 00:45:21.479
And I had to go back and reframe those lies to truth.
00:45:21.639 --> 00:45:28.519
The feelings were real, the experiences were real, but how I interpreted and defined them, it goes back to what we said earlier, weren't real.
00:45:28.599 --> 00:45:29.879
They weren't based in truth.
00:45:30.039 --> 00:45:32.599
And so that's where I had to go and reframe that.
00:45:33.799 --> 00:45:35.239
This is this is all great.
00:45:36.279 --> 00:45:44.119
Rick, how important is faith for achieving purpose-driven success?
00:45:44.679 --> 00:45:45.319
Yeah.
00:45:47.239 --> 00:45:59.079
So if we're talking about faith in terms of a spiritual faith, right, uh as in a belief in something greater than ourselves, if that's if that's the type of faith we're talking about, here's how I would say this.
00:45:59.239 --> 00:46:07.159
I think it is essential and non negotiable for sustained transformation.
00:46:07.319 --> 00:46:10.199
The key word is for sustained transformation.
00:46:10.439 --> 00:46:11.799
I can build anything.
00:46:12.039 --> 00:46:15.879
We are strong humans, we are capable, we can do a lot.
00:46:16.039 --> 00:46:17.559
Our will is powerful.
00:46:17.719 --> 00:46:21.159
When we put our mind to something, we can build, we can do great things.
00:46:21.399 --> 00:46:22.839
I don't know what the limit is there.
00:46:23.399 --> 00:46:31.799
But I believe in my experiences told me that when it's built on myself and my ability, it's limited and eventually is going to run into a wall.
00:46:32.039 --> 00:46:35.239
Eventually it's going to cost me something I didn't want to pay.
00:46:35.399 --> 00:46:38.519
A wife, a child, a family, a relationship, a business.
00:46:38.759 --> 00:46:47.399
When I build upon myself and I am the sole source of my success, I believe we settle for something less than.
00:46:47.559 --> 00:46:48.679
And it could be great.
00:46:48.839 --> 00:46:50.439
Less than doesn't mean it's terrible.
00:46:50.679 --> 00:46:59.159
We could build empires, but there's going to be a huge cost somewhere in there that we are either willing or not willing to admit or face.
00:46:59.479 --> 00:47:01.559
There will be great loss along the way.
00:47:01.719 --> 00:47:07.399
And I don't believe living in that space is one sustainable for long periods of time.
00:47:07.559 --> 00:47:13.079
And two, I don't believe it's a significant life without faith.
00:47:13.319 --> 00:47:15.719
So now, but we can be successful.
00:47:15.879 --> 00:47:17.879
Without faith, we can do a lot.
00:47:18.199 --> 00:47:26.279
I think with faith, we realize that I've been gifted with talents and abilities and skills and understanding and gifts.
00:47:26.439 --> 00:47:30.359
And when I put those to work and I do the work, I go after it.
00:47:30.439 --> 00:47:50.279
But I understand that I am limited ultimately, that apart from something greater than, that gives me the courage to go through hard places well, that gives me the strength to repent and seek forgiveness when I mess up so I can restore relationships, that gives me the ability to not be offended because the world doesn't revolve around me.
00:47:50.359 --> 00:47:58.039
If I'm building on myself, my strength, then really what I'm saying is the world revolves around Rick and I'm the one on the throne.
00:47:58.199 --> 00:48:01.239
And as long as I'm in charge, then I can do this.
00:48:01.319 --> 00:48:06.199
But then that also means that everyone else has the ability to offend me, hurt me, attack me.
00:48:06.279 --> 00:48:08.759
So I'm always defensive postures in that space.
00:48:08.839 --> 00:48:10.839
And man, that's, I don't know if you've ever been there.
00:48:10.919 --> 00:48:11.559
And I've been there.
00:48:11.639 --> 00:48:13.159
I mean, I've sat on my throne.
00:48:13.399 --> 00:48:14.919
It's exhausting.
00:48:15.399 --> 00:48:16.919
It's exhausting.
00:48:17.479 --> 00:48:17.799
Right.
00:48:17.959 --> 00:48:19.479
And we were never meant to live there.
00:48:19.639 --> 00:48:24.439
And so for me, again, long answer for this question, but it's so powerful.
00:48:24.839 --> 00:48:34.039
For me, tapping into that something greater, the belief that I was created with a purpose, a destiny, a future, and a hope in mind.
00:48:34.359 --> 00:48:35.799
I do believe, and I believe you were.
00:48:35.879 --> 00:48:38.679
I believe all humans, whether you guys believe that or not, isn't the point.
00:48:38.759 --> 00:48:40.119
I don't need you to believe it.
00:48:40.279 --> 00:48:41.959
I coach because I believe it.
00:48:42.119 --> 00:48:46.599
Because when I look at you, no matter where you are, what I see is something greater than what you see.
00:48:46.679 --> 00:48:48.119
And you're very successful.
00:48:48.279 --> 00:48:55.639
But Mo, you haven't even touched the tip of what God has, what I believe is destined for you.
00:48:55.959 --> 00:48:59.079
You're just playing with success and significance right now.
00:48:59.159 --> 00:49:00.759
There's so much more greatness in you.
00:49:00.919 --> 00:49:09.319
And what I mean by greatness is the ability to influence and impact the lives of the people and world around you that will live for generations.
00:49:09.639 --> 00:49:11.079
That's what you're meant to do.
00:49:11.319 --> 00:49:14.679
You're doing it, but you haven't seen the fullness of it yet.
00:49:15.559 --> 00:49:16.519
It's coming.
00:49:16.919 --> 00:49:20.839
It's always we're becoming, and that's powerful, man.
00:49:20.919 --> 00:49:23.079
And that's faith tells me that.
00:49:24.279 --> 00:49:26.359
Faith tells me there is more.
00:49:26.999 --> 00:49:28.599
Not stuff and things.
00:49:28.839 --> 00:49:29.959
This is really important.
00:49:30.519 --> 00:49:33.319
It's I say this, this is one of my key lines, right?
00:49:33.399 --> 00:49:34.359
You were created for more.
00:49:34.519 --> 00:49:39.319
Not stuff and things, but influence and impact, a future and a hope.
00:49:39.559 --> 00:49:41.479
I don't know what your more is, Mo.
00:49:41.799 --> 00:49:46.519
I don't know what your listeners' more is, but I believe that you were created for more.
00:49:46.679 --> 00:49:51.719
And my passion and purpose is how do I help you discover the more and walk it out?
00:49:53.479 --> 00:49:54.119
Absolutely.
00:49:54.199 --> 00:50:08.839
I'm hearing an extra layer of faith giving you humility and gratitude and having like an even better access to that to flourish even more.
00:50:09.239 --> 00:50:26.279
So if someone's listening to this, and again, we're not trying to convert anyone to anything, but if someone's listening to this and they're thinking you know, the the capacity of a human being is limited, we know that, or hopefully we know that the capacity of a human being is limited.
00:50:27.159 --> 00:50:38.279
And if someone decides they want to fill that god hole in certain faith, what's step number one?
00:50:42.839 --> 00:50:56.839
Well, I think step number one would be if that's not a place you've been or you've avoided it, or maybe life's experiences has caused you to have a negative view of quote religion, the institution of faith.
00:50:56.999 --> 00:51:05.959
There's a difference between the institution of faith that was created by man and the relationship of faith that was always intended to be.
00:51:06.199 --> 00:51:06.439
Right.
00:51:06.599 --> 00:51:08.119
And so I didn't grow up in a church.
00:51:08.199 --> 00:51:09.159
I didn't grow up of faith.
00:51:09.239 --> 00:51:10.119
I was far from it.
00:51:10.199 --> 00:51:12.039
There was that was not a part of my journey.
00:51:12.119 --> 00:51:14.199
I didn't care about it, I didn't think about it.
00:51:14.279 --> 00:51:15.959
I was until I met this woman.
00:51:16.119 --> 00:51:18.839
I told you about the woman in my dreams, I was sabotaging, right?
00:51:19.079 --> 00:51:23.079
Her dad came to me before we were married and he said, Listen, Rick, we think you're awesome.
00:51:23.239 --> 00:51:25.559
We're so glad you're a part of our daughter's life.
00:51:25.799 --> 00:51:33.799
But here's the thing: if you want a long-term, sustainable relationship with our daughter and this family, you need to get your life right with the Lord.
00:51:34.039 --> 00:51:37.399
And I was like, Lord, what's that?
00:51:37.959 --> 00:51:38.679
Isn't that me?
00:51:38.839 --> 00:51:42.279
I was like, I didn't say it, but inside I'm going, what are you talking about?
00:51:42.439 --> 00:51:43.399
And what does that mean?
00:51:43.559 --> 00:52:10.599
But where I would say you start is be open to a conversation, not about religion and institution and church, but about the belief and the idea that maybe there is a creator that is about relationship that says, Listen, I created you in my image, and that image is good and it's perfect, and it's and listen, there's bad and there's evil, and there's hate and there's brokenness, and we all have the proclivity in us to do damage, right?
00:52:10.759 --> 00:52:15.159
We're selfish beings in our nature just as we are, and that's not wrong.
00:52:15.239 --> 00:52:22.839
It's part of how we were created and wired, but submitted to a greater vision and a greater understanding of our identity, everything changes.
00:52:22.999 --> 00:52:29.559
And so I would say to people, listen, if you're trying to figure out what that looks like, what does that God hold?
00:52:29.639 --> 00:52:30.519
What is the thing?
00:52:30.759 --> 00:52:41.719
I would say, be willing to have conversation and begin to explore the idea that maybe there was a creator that looked at you and your createdness.
00:52:41.879 --> 00:52:43.639
There's a scripture that I love.
00:52:44.199 --> 00:52:49.319
And if it's okay to go there, it's it's one that was hit given to me before faith, before I went down that road.
00:52:49.479 --> 00:52:50.199
I didn't understand it.
00:52:50.359 --> 00:52:51.399
And so, hey, read this.
00:52:51.479 --> 00:52:54.279
And they gave me this scripture, and it was Psalm 139.
00:52:54.359 --> 00:52:56.599
I was like, okay, fine.
00:52:56.679 --> 00:52:58.439
I trust you, I like you, I'll read it.
00:52:58.599 --> 00:53:00.599
But I had no desire for anything.
00:53:00.759 --> 00:53:02.839
I wasn't against religion or faith or Christianity.
00:53:03.079 --> 00:53:04.279
I wasn't, it wasn't against it.
00:53:04.359 --> 00:53:05.719
I was like, but I wasn't for it.
00:53:05.879 --> 00:53:06.919
But I read it.
00:53:07.159 --> 00:53:17.239
Long story short, it's a story of David and God, and God's talking to David, and God is unpacking what he believes and thinks about David as a relationship.
00:53:17.399 --> 00:53:21.239
And he tells David, David, there's no place you can run or hide that I'm not there.
00:53:21.399 --> 00:53:23.079
I've numbered the hairs on your head.
00:53:23.319 --> 00:53:27.479
My thoughts for you are more numerous than every grain of sand on every seashore.
00:53:27.639 --> 00:53:28.519
I mean, just think of that.
00:53:28.679 --> 00:53:29.639
What does that mean?
00:53:29.799 --> 00:53:30.039
Right?
00:53:30.119 --> 00:53:33.559
He says, he says, you know, your highs, I'm with you, your lows, I'm with you.
00:53:33.639 --> 00:53:36.439
He unpacks this relationship.
00:53:36.679 --> 00:53:38.119
And I read it and I was blown away.
00:53:38.199 --> 00:53:43.319
I thought, wow, if that's what faith is, I'm really, really interested.
00:53:43.879 --> 00:53:48.519
Because that is an amazing relationship that is like life-giving.
00:53:48.599 --> 00:53:49.319
It's powerful.
00:53:49.399 --> 00:53:59.239
And so, so that would be where I'd say is just be willing to have an exploration around a conversation of relationship, not religion, not law, not institution.
00:53:59.479 --> 00:54:03.959
Now, I do think there's an importance in community and all that stuff, but it doesn't start there.
00:54:04.119 --> 00:54:11.639
It starts with a could it be that I was created by something who has a purpose, a future, a destiny, and a hope in mind for me?
00:54:11.879 --> 00:54:16.119
And when we get to the purity of my faith, that's exactly what it says.
00:54:16.679 --> 00:54:19.639
It's it talks about my creativity and my identity.
00:54:19.719 --> 00:54:25.319
And when I align my identity with my faith, what can the world do to me?
00:54:25.719 --> 00:54:31.079
Because it's not dependent on whether Mo likes what I say or doesn't, or he agrees or doesn't, it's okay.
00:54:31.239 --> 00:54:33.639
We can disagree, and I'm I'm okay with that.
00:54:33.879 --> 00:54:35.079
It's okay.
00:54:35.719 --> 00:54:52.999
So again, it's a lot there, but I would say the first step is be willing to consider the relational dynamic, a potential of a creator that has something incredible to say about you, that when you align with that, it's the foundation that is not shaky.
00:54:53.559 --> 00:54:55.959
My identity wasn't an abused child.
00:54:56.039 --> 00:54:57.159
That's not who I was.
00:54:57.319 --> 00:54:58.439
I didn't deserve it.
00:54:58.599 --> 00:55:00.119
And God said, no, that wasn't.
00:55:00.199 --> 00:55:01.719
And that's that was terrible.
00:55:01.879 --> 00:55:02.439
That was life.
00:55:02.519 --> 00:55:03.239
It shouldn't have happened.
00:55:03.399 --> 00:55:03.959
Bad things happen.
00:55:04.119 --> 00:55:05.159
This is the world we live in.
00:55:05.319 --> 00:55:07.479
But let me tell you, let me redefine you.
00:55:07.719 --> 00:55:09.159
You are actually a son.
00:55:09.319 --> 00:55:10.679
You are actually valued.
00:55:10.759 --> 00:55:12.439
You are actually worthy to be loved.
00:55:12.599 --> 00:55:14.599
You actually can love unconditionally.
00:55:14.759 --> 00:55:20.599
You actually are worthy to be in a relationship and find a soulmate that's meant to be with you for now 37 years.
00:55:20.679 --> 00:55:22.279
That's my best friend.
00:55:23.479 --> 00:55:24.119
Do you understand?
00:55:24.199 --> 00:55:30.359
It's like he realigned my identity with something greater than what I could have come up with on my own.
00:55:33.159 --> 00:55:36.359
Thank you for listening to Purpose Driven Success with Mo Salami.
00:55:36.759 --> 00:55:40.759
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00:55:40.839 --> 00:55:43.959
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00:55:44.119 --> 00:55:48.199
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00:55:48.359 --> 00:55:55.079
And if today's episode inspired you, check out one of our other insight-filled, value-packed episodes.
00:55:55.239 --> 00:56:02.679
Next week we'll have another amazing guest, so stay tuned for even more real stories and actionable insights.
00:56:02.919 --> 00:56:11.559
Work on your mindset, work on your skill set, and always move in the direction of the result you want before you see the result you want.
00:56:11.719 --> 00:56:15.239
And until next time, do the best you can consistently.
00:56:15.559 --> 00:56:16.359
Ciao.
