Between Chapters: Finding Purpose When the Nest is Empty and the Work is Done - Ep #18

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Welcome back to Next Chapter Un Censored.
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I'm Liana Rowlands.
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Grab your beverage of choice, sit back, and let's chat.
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Have you ever reached a moment where you just felt stuck?
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Like you're standing at a crossroads, not quite sure what your next purpose in life is supposed to be?
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As an empty nester and a retiree, this is something I struggle with almost every day.
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So today I want to talk about how we can start shifting that perspective and what we can actually do to get ourselves out of this rut.
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You know, I used to think that reaching retirement and having an empty nest meant I'd automatically have all the freedom and clarity in the world.
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But the truth is, freedom without a direction can feel a lot like being lost.
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Over the past few months, I've had to completely reframe how I look at purpose.
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It's not about finding one grand monumental mission overnight.
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It's about taking small intentional steps to clear away the noise and start rebuilding momentum.
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So today I want to share four practical mindset shifts that have helped me start pulling myself out of that rut.
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And hopefully they'll help you too.
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First, we need to take the pressure off.
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The word purpose carries so much weight, doesn't it?
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It sounds huge.
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Like you need to discover some grand life-defining calling before you can even get off the couch.
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When I catch myself feeling stuck under that pressure, I swap the word purpose for curiosity.
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You don't need a 20-year master plan today.
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Instead, just ask yourself, what is one small thing that caught my attention this week?
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Is it a class you saw posted locally?
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A book sitting on your shelf?
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A creative project you put off.
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Follow curiosity without demanding that it turned into a massive life mission.
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Curiosity leads to exploration, exploration leads to engagement, and engagement is what actually builds a sense of purpose over time.
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That brings me to the second shift.
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Something I've talked about before.
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Focus on microprojects instead of grand life overhauls.
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When your schedule opens up, trying to reinvent your whole life or map out your entire year is totally overwhelming.
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Paralysis sets in.
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When I feel that kind of freeze, I shrink the target down to something tiny and manageable.
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I'm talking about microprojects.
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Don't try to tackle the whole house.
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Just organize one single drawer or clear out that mug cupboard.
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Spending 20 minutes with a sketchbook, working on a simple design, or trying a new recipe.
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The goal isn't to fix your entire life in an afternoon.
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It's to complete one small thing.
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That quick win gives your brain a hit of momentum and breaks the spell of the rut.
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The third point is huge and it touches something many of us don't talk about enough.
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Reclaiming connection outside of your old identity.
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For decades, so much of our identity was wrapped up in being a full-time parent or holding down a job title.
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When those roles shift, our daily social world shrinks fast.
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The fix here isn't to look back at who you used to be, but to show up as who you are right now in low-stakes ways.
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Get involved in your local community where your old job title doesn't matter at all.
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Volunteer at a local center.
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Pass on a skill to someone who needs a hand.
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Or join a casual group.
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Giving even a little bit of your time and energy outward reminds you of something vital.
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Your value was never tied to a job description or an active nest.
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It's grounded in who you are today.
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And finally, start treating energy as your guide rather than the clock.
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In retirement, you suddenly own all 24 hours of your day.
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But here's the paradox: unlimited free time with zero structure can actually drain your motivation faster than a busy work week.
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Stop trying to schedule your days purely around productivity or time and start paying attention to what actually energizes you versus what leaves you flat.
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Notice the moments where an hour flies by without you checking your phone?
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Anchor your week around two or three of those energizing moments, whether that's a quiet morning walk, a hobby, or time spent learning something entirely new.
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Let energy, not the clock, be the metric that shapes your week.
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If you take just one thing away from our conversation today, I hope it's this.
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Feeling stuck doesn't mean you've lost your way.
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It just means you're standing in the space between chapters.
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You don't need to have the rest of your life figured out by tomorrow morning.
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And you don't need a grand sweeping strategy.
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So my challenge for you this week is to put away the distractions, turn off the screens, and just pick one tiny thing to do.
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Follow a small spark of curiosity, tackle a single microproject, give a little time to your community, or simply do something that fills your tank instead of draining it.
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Momentum isn't built in giant leaps, it's built one small intentional choice at a time.
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Be gentle with yourself as you navigate this phase.
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Reinventing how we live and show up after decades of routine takes time, and you are allowed to figure it out as you go.
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Thank you so much for sitting with me today.
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It means the world to have you here in our little corner of the podcast world.
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If this episode spoke to you, please share it with a friend who might need to hear it too.
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Hit that follow or subscribe button and leave a review if you can.
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It really helps other women find our community.
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Until next time, protect your peace, give yourself grace, take a deep breath, keep taking those small steps forward.
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You got this.
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Bye for now.