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Hello everybody and welcome to All Things Considered Franchising podcast. I am your host, Scott Scotty Milos and I've been around the franchising space. Well, seems like a lifetime. So welcome to the show.
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Just a little FYI.
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I help people explore franchise ownership, see if it's the right path for them, and more importantly, provide an educational journey to see how a brand that fit can fit your goals and lifestyle. I also educate my clients on how to validate and make a logical business decision as well as an informed decision. On this show, you'll hear directly from franchise owners as well as franchisors leading exciting brands and people within and in the industry of franchising. You can always connect with me at scotty@the perfect franchise.com that is my email address. Visit the websites at the perfect franchise.com or Scott Milo's franchisecoach.com. you can also text and call me at 413-935-5111. Now let's get into today exciting episode.
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Hey everybody and welcome to another episode of All Things Considered Franchising. I am your host, Scott Scotty Milas. I am the founder of All Things Considered Franchising as well as Scott Milas franchisecoach.com which is powered by the Perfect Franchise, an educational platform to help people research and business ownership. Today's guest is going to step outside of our platform a little bit and I think it's very important to because Gino and I were just talking prior to coming on with this and I'm a believer in mindset. Positive mindset brings positive results. And Gino is a founder of like I mentioned, Barbara360, focusing on building wealth, building legacies, having a positive mindset to really include families, you know, your family. I think you mentioned something earlier to me is that behavior is not money, I think you said, or something like that. But anyway, Gino, welcome to the show and glad to have you and I hope you're able to and I know you'll be able to provide a lot of guidance here for people who are interested in really thinking about building a legacy because a legacy is not easy to build.
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Well, Scott, my saying with legacies, it's, it's not something you leave behind. It's something that you activate today. And I'm hoping through the conversation today will activate some minds into saying, well, it's not, I'm not leaving it. I'm actually today's the day to start building the legacy. To start whether it's opening up a franchise, whether it's you Know, retiring, whether it is having another child, whatever that is, whatever you want your legacy to be, it's not something you're leaving, it's something that you have to start taking action with today.
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So with that being said, let's just kind of paint this picture. We have a couple, maybe two young kids, maybe they're in their mid-30s, late-30s, both corporate executives, and they're kind of sitting there scratching their head, going, hey, what are we doing here? What are we building? You know, kids are young, but, you know, 10 years from now, college, whatever. So if you were going to sit down and coach somebody and provide some guidance on how and where to start thinking about building a legacy, how would you coach it? What actions can somebody take to at least get the ball rolling to start building and thinking about this legacy?
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The first thing that I would do is I would read the book the Seven Habits by Stephen Covey, and what he talks about is start with the end in mind.
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And.
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And it's Basically, if you're 35 years old, I know most people don't do this. I know I didn't do this until I was a little bit older. But sit down and just think of yourself 35, 40 years into the future on your front porch hanging out. What does your life look like? What do you want it to look like? I mean, for me, right now, if I'm going to look 20 years into the future, I've got a really good idea of where I'm going and where I want to go to. I want to have a bunch of grandkids. I've got six children ages 26 to 11. I want to have a bunch of grandkids around me. I want to have built this amazing legacy that I know I've have all this wealth, but not only did I have this wealth and I've created this wealth, I've created this wealth with, with a purpose in mind. I've been able to financially steward this wealth and teach my kids about this wealth. I've been able to pass on my values that I've built through the family to my children. So the first thing is to paint that picture for yourself. Where do you want to go? Where do you want to be in those next 20, 20, 30 years? Reverse engineer that. And the second thing is that you can do today is really think about what your values and what your spouse's values are and start making decisions today based upon your values. We call it values based decision making. I mean, if you want to build a real great life of legacy and A life of freedom. Should you be spending a ton of money on luxuries today or should you maybe be deferring that? Every decision you make, whether it's leaving the corporate world, whether it's starting a business, whether it's homeschooling your kids. We homeschooled all of our kids. It was part of our values. It's, it's, was, was it easy? No. But we knew it was the right thing to do because we checked the values and we say we want to do that. I went into real estate and I went into multifamily real estate because it aligned with my values. I wanted control. I wanted an asset that I could grow. I wanted a vehicle that wasn't just something where I put money into it and I was passive. I wanted to be able to provide something to my residents, but at the same time was able to build long term wealth. That's why at asset multifamily for me checked all of the boxes.
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So in my coaching and consulting with my clients, I use a philosophy, a decision making process called Zeno's Paradox. A lot of people have heard that term through a movie called Sleepless, Sleepless in Seattle with Meg Ryan. There was the scene on the balcony where they start taking infinitive half steps, getting closer and closer to each other. And then you know, it's who's going to make the first move or make the decision to re. Lean in and give that first kiss. The reason they don't have that kiss, eventually kiss. But a lot of fear comes in. So if you were going to sit down and coach a couple, this couple that we're talking about, how would you break this out into those infinitive small half steps? Because you don't wake up one morning and say, I'm gonna have 1900 multi unit families. I mean you gotta start out realistically and kind of build. I mean it's kind of like, you know, I was taught as a kid that when you invested in stocks, invest in stocks that have dividends and reinvest the dividends, that was a great idea. So how do you coach people on that? How do you, how would you guide somebody to pick that starting point? You mentioned a passion.
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For me, I, I want to educate people and make them understand where they are on the journey. Because I never want to force somebody. Petroska and Declement, they came up with that study the transtheoretical change process. Right. There's six steps to change. And the problem is that 80% of people that you talk to aren't ready. They're not ready to take action. That's. That's the fourth step. The first step is the pre contemplation. They're not even contemplating it yet, right? They haven't even taken a step yet. The second step is, hopefully I'm able to allow them to contemplate the change. Oh, wow. Maybe I can start investing in real estate. Well, the third one is the preparation. Now we're having these calls, and we're preparing to have these calls. The fourth one is now I'm taking action. Now I'm all dialed in, and I'll. And I'll share the story of how, how I, you know, led myself down this path unknowingly, unconsciously knowing it. Then after you're taking the action, the fifth one is, oh, now I'm really doing this. I'm actually. Built that habit, build that muscle. And the sixth one is, it's. You just become your identity. Like you're, you're just doing it. It's like, it's. It's become part of you. For me, back in 2008, the Great Recession, I had just lost my father. I was in the contemplation stage. I don't want to be at this restaurant anymore. I'm not building wealth. I hate it. I pick up the book by T. Harv Eker. I start reading the Secrets of the Millionaire Mind, and I'm like, dude, this guy's got something here. Because he's saying, my fruits are my roots and my roots are shallow. That's why I have no fruits. So all of a sudden, I'm in the contemplation, taking education, the third stage. And then I start learning about it slowly. And I would tell people, if you want to have a shift in life, it does take a little bit of time, but you do have to have some type of pain in your life. If you don't have any discomfort or pain, you're not going to take action. And for me, there was pain in a lot of different levels at that restaurant. I was working harder, making less. I. I really had to say to myself, am I living my dad's dream or am I living my dream? Because he's the one who started the restaurant. And then I've got this feeling of I'm going to this job where I really don't like. I mean, God's given me these two great parents. He's given me this great opportunity. Born in the best country on the planet, and yet I'm stuck in the kitchen hiding out. Am I being slothful right now, and then on top of that, I'm coming home, I'm pissed off, I'm angry, I. I'm grumpy, and I don't want my kids to see me that way because I don't want them to equate work and those attitudes and those beliefs. So I had a lot of pain going on, and I had to search for what was going on. If you're really. Not really uncomfortable or if you're sitting in that quagmire, you're not going to take action. But if you're in a lot of pain or if you're really doing great and you want to take it to the next level, those are the two. But for you, I would soul search and say, why is it. What is it that I'm afraid of? And why do I want to get out of the situation I want to get out of? And that's how I was able to, over a couple of years, find my business partner and start buying multifamily.
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You just kind of really, you know, hit the nail on the head with a lot of the clients I work with. It's not that they don't want change or make things better, but that word fear, anxiety, you know, change isn't easy. I think you just said that before. So when we talk about fear and making change, we have to make sure that at least in case. When I'm coaching people, it's to making sure that you're getting validation to make an informed decision, but not a decision based on fear. So when you look at the people you've worked with, what are some of the fears? Or how do people get past that fear to make change? Because in some cases, you know, people have to write a check to get past this. Maybe they start out so. So where does somebody kind of get that validation to go ahead and say, I want to make these changes, I want to make my family better, I want to make myself better, I want to be. I want to have a healthier mindset so I can get to building that legacy. Because without those things, you cannot build the legacy.
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It's interesting. You've mentioned the word mindset a few times in the show, and it's. It's an important component. When I read the book Mindset by Carol Dweck, it just changed my whole paradigm about mindset, because in the book, she talks about two types of mindsets. The fixed mindset, that's the mindset that is blaming. That's the mindset that thinks that all my Characteristics are immutable. I'm born a natural born singer or I don't really have to work hard for this. It should come easy for me. Everyone's told me that I'm the and smart my whole life and now I'm up against the challenge or on the John Macar of the world, where it's never my fault. It's the sawdust, it's the noise, it's the crowd. It wasn't my day. That's the fixed mindset versus the growth mindset, which is where I think you live and where I think you want your clients to live. Where the growth mindset says, yeah, there's gonna be some hard days like when you're gonna leave the restaurant, man, you're gonna get kicked in the teeth. There's gonna be a lot of problems. But the growth mindset says, ah, that's a problem. Where's the opportunity? Where's the growth in it? We're either a non learner, which is the fixed mindset, or we're a learner, which is the growth mindset. And the epitome to me of a growth mindset was Michael Jordan. The guy got cut in high school. He ends up winning three NBA championships. Then he quits and goes to play baseball. Now everyone in the fixed mindset says, why would he do that? He's the best at basketball. But the growth mindset says, well, he literally got bored. He needed another challenge. He wanted to try something new. And to him, there's no such thing as failure. There's only. There's only the ability to see how good I can be at something different. He ended up leaving there. He paid a little over 200 in double A ball. And when you talk to major leaguers, they're like, that's incredible what he did. I mean, he hadn't played since little league. He picks up a bat in his 30s. So to the growth mindset, that's like incredible. But to the fixed mindset, they're like, you're a loser, you're a failure. So he ends up quitting, goes back to basketball, and he ends up winning the following three NBA championships. So to me, it really does come down to what type of mindset are you exhibiting in different areas of your life? And if you could look at the area that you're trying to accomplish, whether it's building real estate, whether it's building a business, buying a franchise, whether it's growing a family, growing wealth, if you can learn to adopt that growth mindset, be open and be a learner and be willing to say, hey, I'm going to make mistakes, Mistakes, but how do I learn from it? That to me is the crux and the beginning of any successful endeavor.
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How much of the circle of life, the, the package that all this and tames that you're talking about has to be in order to be able to move forward, at least if yourself taking steps forward to get to what you're talking about. I mean, you, you, you spend a lot of time with people. How to grow a happy family. I mean, if someone's in a, in a, an unhappy environment, miserable environment, is it safe to say that it's going to be a harder challenge to get to it? Or is doing what you're talking about, taking those steps to change your pain gonna help you get to a happy family?
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I remember when I was younger and I'm probably dating myself, but I'd be driving around my car and I'd be listening to Zig Ziglar on these audio tapes. I'd be listening to Jim Rome. That's the first step, is that you want to do it yourself and you need to take on responsibility. And that's what the growth mindset says. How do I, what, what do I need to do? And that's the first step is really to start ingesting that great content. And Zig, listening to him for all those years, listening to that Southern drawl really helped me out. And then I ended up becoming a life coach. Not because I wanted to become a life coach, but because I needed to learn those skills. I wanted to learn the personal development side even before I took on the challenges of making money. Because I was in business for years, I didn't have the skills to grow that business or to grow myself personally. I didn't have those skills. So I needed to learn. So I went and became a life coach. 15 years ago or so, when it wasn't the cool thing. I mean, life coaching was like, woo, woo. But now we realize that, you know, you go back into the great learners of St. Augustine and St. Thomas Aquinas. They were the first, in my opinion, life coaches. I mean, they were really spiritual, but they were really talking about the divine and about the self and how to build oneself, right? And for me, that that's where I think you need to start. I think you need to diagnose where you are in life and then get clear on where you want to go and how are you going to do that? What, what are the steps that you need to take and you need to work on the self and not focus on making the money. I was always focused on making the money. I was always focused on the result. Yeah. And I have to say, my three step framework, the three pillars, is the mindset, right? The mindset is how we think the money patterns. The second part is how we behave, that relationship we have with money, like the patterns and the beliefs and the values that we've created at an unconscious level. When we were youngsters, we were 9, 10, 12 years old, and mom told you to put that back, we can't afford it. Money doesn't grow on trees. How many times did I hear that? I was, I was brought up in a household where there was a lot of scarcity, a lot of fear on money. I was conditioned to save. It's pretty hard to have that mindset when you're trying to build a business and scale a business because you have money in the savings account, but you can't touch that because if I touch that unconsciously, I'm going to die. But Scott's telling me I need that because I need to invest that in the business. So you need to go and look at both of those. How do you reconcile one with the other? How do you know? How do you look at that relationship you have with money and see if it's true? Because some of those you. That's your lived experience. But I'm here to tell you, I thought you needed money to make money in real estate. When I realized on our first deal we got seller financing, the owner financed part of the down payment, so we needed less money. And then when I realized that you could syndicate real estate and you can get investors to put money in your deals, I was like, wow, I have all of these beliefs around money that are just false. They're my beliefs, they're things that I learned as a young adult, and I brought them into my adulthood. But if I wasn't there doing the stuff now and challenging those beliefs, I'd still be at that restaurant right now. Scott.
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Yeah, no, I. I spent a lot of time in the restaurant industry. I was there. So, you know, I tell people, call me up and say, hey, look, can you help me get a chick fil A? And I go, well, first of all, I can't because it's not a traditional franchise. And two, why chick fil A? I mean, it's a great model.
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Yes.
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I guess If I was 25, 30 years old, and I wanted to get paid 150 grand a year to run a restaurant, it's great. But as I tell People, you know, you come out of that, and after five, 10 years, you don't own anything.
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No.
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You put in sweat equity. Now, hopefully you have a nice bank account, because you probably won't have any time to spend your money. But.
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Yes. Yeah.
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How much of this is financial responsibility, Gino? And by the way, folks, we're talking to Gino Barbero, who is. His mission through Barbero360 is really to empower families to build the lasting legacies by focusing on restoring traditional values. I guess that's the best way to put it. So how much of this is money? Responsibility. Financial responsibility, Understanding how dollars. You just said, well, I didn't know that I could do this. I didn't know I could do that. So how much of that is you educating people about the opportunities to be responsible with investing, reinvesting, and how to spend the money and save the money?
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It's interesting because I think, you know, the whole school system and the whole society has been dumbed down over the last 50 years. I mean, that's literally why we started homeschooling our kids, because the public school system literally was dumbing kids down, and they weren't teaching kids about things that are important, like, really, how to cook a meal, how to run a household. Right. We're learning about the War of 1812, which is really important. Hey, you know, Britain came and they burned the White House. And who was it at the time? Was it Madison? Madison ran out. That's all important. But if I can't write a check, if I can't balance my checkbook and I don't know what a 401k is, none of the other stuff really matters. That's the reality. So the first step is I. I am so passionate about working with families, especially working with couples, because I think when you see the degradation of what's happened with the household and how families have separated and have the families have broken down, that is what's led to a lot of the problems with money. Because if you don't have a healthy relationship at home, if you don't have a stable foundation at home, and you don't have the ability to teach your kids about money when they go into the world and they learn money from other people, they learn money from Visa, and they learn money from all these other websites, you know, all these budgeting apps and all, it's great, great information, but it's not practical information. So I think for me, if you're a parent out there, I mean, you have to learn about money, and you have to start talking to your kids around money. You have to. To prepare them about money. And for me, that, that, that. That's the most important thing for me is really to have parents sit down and start talking to their kids about money and not, not getting defensive or, you know, criticizing. Getting criticism from your kids because they may say, hey, dad, you know why, you know why. Why are we living in this house? Why can't we afford something better? Don't take it as a criticism. I mean, they're just. They're just curious about money. And I remember growing up, sometimes some of the kids, they would ask, you know, why are we shopping at this store? Well, I can't. I can't afford going somewhere else. Be honest with them, be open with them, but teach them the skills of money. Teach them the rules of money.
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So the person that's in the corporate position just kind of, you know, doesn't like what they do, doesn't like the people they work for. You know, has every excuse in the world. But what I consider to be that complacent optimist, somebody who's just, you know, waiting to get. For it to get better. How do you coach somebody to say, change is good? I mean, how do you just say, hey, look, you've got to get out of your own way and either make the effort to change or you're just going to be a complacent optimist the rest of your life, so to speak. I mean, is. How do you, how do you coach someone like that?
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So you want to get. You want to kick them in the ass? You want to make them do something that they're not even aware that they can do. I think the first thing is, like, how we started off the podcast. I mean, what is, what is there? Maybe they do like their situation, but they just like to complain. I don't want to push them into a business where they think the grass is greener on the other side. Let's really look at the other side and see what the other side goes through. Let's see the sleepless nights and signing the check on the front versus signing the check on the back. I mean, there's a lot of great things about being.
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There is a lot of fear. You know, there's. It's funny, you know, you use the term the grass is greener on the other side. I always like to tell people, like, yes, the grass may be greener on the other side, but you still gotta water the lawn and cut it.
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I like that. And so for them, it's really getting them crystal clear because a lot of these people have never really had any kind of coaching or any kind of personal development. And then you start asking them these questions. And Scott, I see a lot of times people don't even know how to answer these questions because they've never been asked these questions. You know, what does look life look like in three years? What does life look like in five years? What is your, what is your, what are your monthly income goals? Why are you buying this business? What is buying a business going to do for you? Do you have six months of earnings set aside if something goes bad? These are all questions that you need to ask somebody, but ultimately you want to really drill it down to them because you being the coach that you are, you're a great coach. You know that if you ask the right questions, everyone has the answers with within them. The better questions that you can ask somebody, the more space you give them, the better you're able to extract the question that's hidden inside of them. Because a lot of the times, like you said, you keep using that word, fear. We're just afraid of telling the truth. We know the answer. We're just afraid of saying it ourselves. Maybe that person is just doesn't like his job. Maybe he can go find another job. He doesn't have to blow up all of his money. Maybe he hates it, but he loves landscaping. Whatever the case may be, I don't think you need to go and buy a business if you think you hate the corporate world. Maybe there's something within the corporate world that you like, but you really need, you really need to drill down and drill down and see where the pain is and where the frustration, where the anger and where the unhappiness is coming from.
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Yeah, I just think entrepreneurs really have that extra hop in their step. It's something they really want to do. They see the, they, they can see the results. They work, life balance, not having to go to the, you know, the corner office to get permission to take a day off to go watch a soccer game or a football game or whatever. So I think there's a, there's a special drive for entrepreneurs, entrepreneurship. It's not for everybody. Franchising is not for everybody. Real estate's not for everybody. But it's interesting. So just to close this out, what does a happy legacy, what does a happy legacy really look like? I mean, if somebody was going to, if, if 15, 20 years from now, you were going to sit at the table and tell your kids, this is what I did. This is why I did it. This is what has made my life worthwhile living outside of, of course, your kids and, and your wife. But what is a happy legacy look like?
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To me, a happy legacy looks like something that I'm building today with my kids. I don't want to wait 15 years from now and tell them, this is what I built. I want to build it with them. I mean, we're having weekly family rhythms with the kids. We have a family governance. We have core values. We have a mission statement. And when I say we, it's not. I, I am building it with them because I want to impart the knowledge and the wisdom that I have. And there's three parts to it. Most of us focus on the financial part of it, which is really important. We need to teach them about the money, we need to teach them about the stewardship. But there's also the human component of legacy, which is the family itself, the unique genius that each child has along with their spouses. One of my kids loves to do medical massage. Another one loves to work on the farm. Another one works, loves to work on the business. They all have their unique gifts. Let's bring all those gifts within the legacy and within the family. So when they get older, one of them can teach their, you know, their, their, their aunt, their nieces and nephews how to ride a horse and how to milk a cow. Another one can give medical massages to their kids. So the human component is really important. But then you have the intellectual component, which is all the stuff that I'm doing with the other kids as far as teaching them, writing books, doing the podcasts, building the Borrower360 company with the family to teach them how to run a business. So there's financial, human and intellectual. That's what, to me looks like a happy legacy. And you're building it with your family, so you' ultimately just leaving this whole footprint for them. So when they take over, they understand the governance, they understand how to run and operate this whole legacy machine, and they're incorporating the entire family with it, so then they can leave the blueprint for the next generation.
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Wow. Very interesting. Well, Gino, this has certainly been very interesting and, and again, to the audience that's listening, you know, it is a little outside the mainstream, but I think, you know, when you're starting to build an empire, a legacy, you have to have a foundation. It's like anything in life. You know, it's like if you're building a house, you need a foundation. If you're if you're going to go to college, you got to have an education in high school. It's that foundation, whatever. And this is a great way. And again, I circle back, building that foundation, that mindset, mindset, that positive attitude, you know, the comfort of family and kind of everybody on board. So this is great, Gino, maybe you could share with the audience how people can connect with you if they wanted to reach out to learn more, to talk to you, maybe, you know, tap you on the back shoulder and bring you on board for some, some guidance. So what, what's the best way for someone to get a hold of you at this point? Or websites.
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They can just go to genobarboro.com it's my name Gino, last name barbaro.com or they can go to the family website, which is barworld360.com.
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Okay, great. Any closing thoughts? Anything you'd like to share before we say, you know, we, we certainly would like to get you back again.
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I want to plug, I want to. Yeah, I want to plug what you're doing. Because I think buying a franchise, it can be a really great first step for any business owner because we talk about systems, processes, people, you're, you're buying that in a franchise. What I would say to anybody, if you're going to buy a food franchise, if you're going to buy a home services franchise, I would at least buy something that I'm interested in and something that I want to participate in if I love food. And people are saying you shouldn't get into a restaurant, but that's what you love and that's, that's what you want to aspire to. You're going to show up every day and you have to understand that you're in business as a franchisor to create value for the marketplace. And that's what I think franchises do really well. They've understood how to create value for their customers. So you're buying a system or a process. And as an entrepreneur, that's the name of the game. The more value you can create in the marketplace, the more you're going to get rewarded. Hence, the money is just a result of you adding a tremendous amount of value in the marketplace.
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That's great. You. We just did a segment on Rapid Fire Q A, which is a live thing I do on LinkedIn. But one of the questions was competition. And I'm a believer in competition because one of the questions questions was, what about if I'm first to market? Well, in franchising, you have to understand that there's a reason why there's not somebody there selling pizza or painting a house because there may not be a market. Yeah, it's, it's interesting. But, but Gino, once again, thanks very much. I mean I enjoyed the conversation. Like to get you back again, but again, Gino Barbero and it's B A R B A R O. You can also find them on the link LinkedIn as well if you want to connect with again, this is Scott, Scotty Milus, All Things Considered Franchising. You can reach me at Scotty at the franchise the perfect franchise.com or scott@scottmylasfranchisecoach.com you can also check out All Things Considered Franchising on all of your favorite podcast channels. Over 300 episodes so far. We're just getting ready to end our third season. So it's, it's great. But Gino, thanks again. And until next time, folks, this is Scott Scotty Milo saying be well.
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Hello everybody and welcome to All Things Considered Franchising podcast. I am your host, Scott Scotty Milos and I've been around the franchising space. Well, seems like a lifetime. So welcome to the show.
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Just a little FYI.
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I help people explore franchise ownership, see if it's the right path for them, and more importantly, provide an educational journey to see how a brand that fit can fit your goals and lifestyle. I also educate my clients on how to validate and make a logical business decision as well as an informed decision. On this show, you'll hear directly from franchise owners as well as franchisors leading exciting brands and people within and in the industry of franchising. You can always connect with me at scotty@the perfect franchise.com that is my email address. Visit the websites at the perfect franchise.com or Scott Milo's franchisecoach.com. you can also text and call me at 413-935-5111. Now let's get into today exciting episode.
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Hey everybody and welcome to another episode of All Things Considered Franchising. I am your host, Scott Scotty Milas. I am the founder of All Things Considered Franchising as well as Scott Milas franchisecoach.com which is powered by the Perfect Franchise, an educational platform to help people research and business ownership. Today's guest is going to step outside of our platform a little bit and I think it's very important to because Gino and I were just talking prior to coming on with this and I'm a believer in mindset. Positive mindset brings positive results. And Gino is a founder of like I mentioned, Barbara360, focusing on building wealth, building legacies, having a positive mindset to really include families, you know, your family. I think you mentioned something earlier to me is that behavior is not money, I think you said, or something like that. But anyway, Gino, welcome to the show and glad to have you and I hope you're able to and I know you'll be able to provide a lot of guidance here for people who are interested in really thinking about building a legacy because a legacy is not easy to build.
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Well, Scott, my saying with legacies, it's, it's not something you leave behind. It's something that you activate today. And I'm hoping through the conversation today will activate some minds into saying, well, it's not, I'm not leaving it. I'm actually today's the day to start building the legacy. To start whether it's opening up a franchise, whether it's you Know, retiring, whether it is having another child, whatever that is, whatever you want your legacy to be, it's not something you're leaving, it's something that you have to start taking action with today.
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So with that being said, let's just kind of paint this picture. We have a couple, maybe two young kids, maybe they're in their mid-30s, late-30s, both corporate executives, and they're kind of sitting there scratching their head, going, hey, what are we doing here? What are we building? You know, kids are young, but, you know, 10 years from now, college, whatever. So if you were going to sit down and coach somebody and provide some guidance on how and where to start thinking about building a legacy, how would you coach it? What actions can somebody take to at least get the ball rolling to start building and thinking about this legacy?
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The first thing that I would do is I would read the book the Seven Habits by Stephen Covey, and what he talks about is start with the end in mind.
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And.
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And it's Basically, if you're 35 years old, I know most people don't do this. I know I didn't do this until I was a little bit older. But sit down and just think of yourself 35, 40 years into the future on your front porch hanging out. What does your life look like? What do you want it to look like? I mean, for me, right now, if I'm going to look 20 years into the future, I've got a really good idea of where I'm going and where I want to go to. I want to have a bunch of grandkids. I've got six children ages 26 to 11. I want to have a bunch of grandkids around me. I want to have built this amazing legacy that I know I've have all this wealth, but not only did I have this wealth and I've created this wealth, I've created this wealth with, with a purpose in mind. I've been able to financially steward this wealth and teach my kids about this wealth. I've been able to pass on my values that I've built through the family to my children. So the first thing is to paint that picture for yourself. Where do you want to go? Where do you want to be in those next 20, 20, 30 years? Reverse engineer that. And the second thing is that you can do today is really think about what your values and what your spouse's values are and start making decisions today based upon your values. We call it values based decision making. I mean, if you want to build a real great life of legacy and A life of freedom. Should you be spending a ton of money on luxuries today or should you maybe be deferring that? Every decision you make, whether it's leaving the corporate world, whether it's starting a business, whether it's homeschooling your kids. We homeschooled all of our kids. It was part of our values. It's, it's, was, was it easy? No. But we knew it was the right thing to do because we checked the values and we say we want to do that. I went into real estate and I went into multifamily real estate because it aligned with my values. I wanted control. I wanted an asset that I could grow. I wanted a vehicle that wasn't just something where I put money into it and I was passive. I wanted to be able to provide something to my residents, but at the same time was able to build long term wealth. That's why at asset multifamily for me checked all of the boxes.
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So in my coaching and consulting with my clients, I use a philosophy, a decision making process called Zeno's Paradox. A lot of people have heard that term through a movie called Sleepless, Sleepless in Seattle with Meg Ryan. There was the scene on the balcony where they start taking infinitive half steps, getting closer and closer to each other. And then you know, it's who's going to make the first move or make the decision to re. Lean in and give that first kiss. The reason they don't have that kiss, eventually kiss. But a lot of fear comes in. So if you were going to sit down and coach a couple, this couple that we're talking about, how would you break this out into those infinitive small half steps? Because you don't wake up one morning and say, I'm gonna have 1900 multi unit families. I mean you gotta start out realistically and kind of build. I mean it's kind of like, you know, I was taught as a kid that when you invested in stocks, invest in stocks that have dividends and reinvest the dividends, that was a great idea. So how do you coach people on that? How do you, how would you guide somebody to pick that starting point? You mentioned a passion.
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For me, I, I want to educate people and make them understand where they are on the journey. Because I never want to force somebody. Petroska and Declement, they came up with that study the transtheoretical change process. Right. There's six steps to change. And the problem is that 80% of people that you talk to aren't ready. They're not ready to take action. That's. That's the fourth step. The first step is the pre contemplation. They're not even contemplating it yet, right? They haven't even taken a step yet. The second step is, hopefully I'm able to allow them to contemplate the change. Oh, wow. Maybe I can start investing in real estate. Well, the third one is the preparation. Now we're having these calls, and we're preparing to have these calls. The fourth one is now I'm taking action. Now I'm all dialed in, and I'll. And I'll share the story of how, how I, you know, led myself down this path unknowingly, unconsciously knowing it. Then after you're taking the action, the fifth one is, oh, now I'm really doing this. I'm actually. Built that habit, build that muscle. And the sixth one is, it's. You just become your identity. Like you're, you're just doing it. It's like, it's. It's become part of you. For me, back in 2008, the Great Recession, I had just lost my father. I was in the contemplation stage. I don't want to be at this restaurant anymore. I'm not building wealth. I hate it. I pick up the book by T. Harv Eker. I start reading the Secrets of the Millionaire Mind, and I'm like, dude, this guy's got something here. Because he's saying, my fruits are my roots and my roots are shallow. That's why I have no fruits. So all of a sudden, I'm in the contemplation, taking education, the third stage. And then I start learning about it slowly. And I would tell people, if you want to have a shift in life, it does take a little bit of time, but you do have to have some type of pain in your life. If you don't have any discomfort or pain, you're not going to take action. And for me, there was pain in a lot of different levels at that restaurant. I was working harder, making less. I. I really had to say to myself, am I living my dad's dream or am I living my dream? Because he's the one who started the restaurant. And then I've got this feeling of I'm going to this job where I really don't like. I mean, God's given me these two great parents. He's given me this great opportunity. Born in the best country on the planet, and yet I'm stuck in the kitchen hiding out. Am I being slothful right now, and then on top of that, I'm coming home, I'm pissed off, I'm angry, I. I'm grumpy, and I don't want my kids to see me that way because I don't want them to equate work and those attitudes and those beliefs. So I had a lot of pain going on, and I had to search for what was going on. If you're really. Not really uncomfortable or if you're sitting in that quagmire, you're not going to take action. But if you're in a lot of pain or if you're really doing great and you want to take it to the next level, those are the two. But for you, I would soul search and say, why is it. What is it that I'm afraid of? And why do I want to get out of the situation I want to get out of? And that's how I was able to, over a couple of years, find my business partner and start buying multifamily.
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You just kind of really, you know, hit the nail on the head with a lot of the clients I work with. It's not that they don't want change or make things better, but that word fear, anxiety, you know, change isn't easy. I think you just said that before. So when we talk about fear and making change, we have to make sure that at least in case. When I'm coaching people, it's to making sure that you're getting validation to make an informed decision, but not a decision based on fear. So when you look at the people you've worked with, what are some of the fears? Or how do people get past that fear to make change? Because in some cases, you know, people have to write a check to get past this. Maybe they start out so. So where does somebody kind of get that validation to go ahead and say, I want to make these changes, I want to make my family better, I want to make myself better, I want to be. I want to have a healthier mindset so I can get to building that legacy. Because without those things, you cannot build the legacy.
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It's interesting. You've mentioned the word mindset a few times in the show, and it's. It's an important component. When I read the book Mindset by Carol Dweck, it just changed my whole paradigm about mindset, because in the book, she talks about two types of mindsets. The fixed mindset, that's the mindset that is blaming. That's the mindset that thinks that all my Characteristics are immutable. I'm born a natural born singer or I don't really have to work hard for this. It should come easy for me. Everyone's told me that I'm the and smart my whole life and now I'm up against the challenge or on the John Macar of the world, where it's never my fault. It's the sawdust, it's the noise, it's the crowd. It wasn't my day. That's the fixed mindset versus the growth mindset, which is where I think you live and where I think you want your clients to live. Where the growth mindset says, yeah, there's gonna be some hard days like when you're gonna leave the restaurant, man, you're gonna get kicked in the teeth. There's gonna be a lot of problems. But the growth mindset says, ah, that's a problem. Where's the opportunity? Where's the growth in it? We're either a non learner, which is the fixed mindset, or we're a learner, which is the growth mindset. And the epitome to me of a growth mindset was Michael Jordan. The guy got cut in high school. He ends up winning three NBA championships. Then he quits and goes to play baseball. Now everyone in the fixed mindset says, why would he do that? He's the best at basketball. But the growth mindset says, well, he literally got bored. He needed another challenge. He wanted to try something new. And to him, there's no such thing as failure. There's only. There's only the ability to see how good I can be at something different. He ended up leaving there. He paid a little over 200 in double A ball. And when you talk to major leaguers, they're like, that's incredible what he did. I mean, he hadn't played since little league. He picks up a bat in his 30s. So to the growth mindset, that's like incredible. But to the fixed mindset, they're like, you're a loser, you're a failure. So he ends up quitting, goes back to basketball, and he ends up winning the following three NBA championships. So to me, it really does come down to what type of mindset are you exhibiting in different areas of your life? And if you could look at the area that you're trying to accomplish, whether it's building real estate, whether it's building a business, buying a franchise, whether it's growing a family, growing wealth, if you can learn to adopt that growth mindset, be open and be a learner and be willing to say, hey, I'm going to make mistakes, Mistakes, but how do I learn from it? That to me is the crux and the beginning of any successful endeavor.
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How much of the circle of life, the, the package that all this and tames that you're talking about has to be in order to be able to move forward, at least if yourself taking steps forward to get to what you're talking about. I mean, you, you, you spend a lot of time with people. How to grow a happy family. I mean, if someone's in a, in a, an unhappy environment, miserable environment, is it safe to say that it's going to be a harder challenge to get to it? Or is doing what you're talking about, taking those steps to change your pain gonna help you get to a happy family?
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I remember when I was younger and I'm probably dating myself, but I'd be driving around my car and I'd be listening to Zig Ziglar on these audio tapes. I'd be listening to Jim Rome. That's the first step, is that you want to do it yourself and you need to take on responsibility. And that's what the growth mindset says. How do I, what, what do I need to do? And that's the first step is really to start ingesting that great content. And Zig, listening to him for all those years, listening to that Southern drawl really helped me out. And then I ended up becoming a life coach. Not because I wanted to become a life coach, but because I needed to learn those skills. I wanted to learn the personal development side even before I took on the challenges of making money. Because I was in business for years, I didn't have the skills to grow that business or to grow myself personally. I didn't have those skills. So I needed to learn. So I went and became a life coach. 15 years ago or so, when it wasn't the cool thing. I mean, life coaching was like, woo, woo. But now we realize that, you know, you go back into the great learners of St. Augustine and St. Thomas Aquinas. They were the first, in my opinion, life coaches. I mean, they were really spiritual, but they were really talking about the divine and about the self and how to build oneself, right? And for me, that that's where I think you need to start. I think you need to diagnose where you are in life and then get clear on where you want to go and how are you going to do that? What, what are the steps that you need to take and you need to work on the self and not focus on making the money. I was always focused on making the money. I was always focused on the result. Yeah. And I have to say, my three step framework, the three pillars, is the mindset, right? The mindset is how we think the money patterns. The second part is how we behave, that relationship we have with money, like the patterns and the beliefs and the values that we've created at an unconscious level. When we were youngsters, we were 9, 10, 12 years old, and mom told you to put that back, we can't afford it. Money doesn't grow on trees. How many times did I hear that? I was, I was brought up in a household where there was a lot of scarcity, a lot of fear on money. I was conditioned to save. It's pretty hard to have that mindset when you're trying to build a business and scale a business because you have money in the savings account, but you can't touch that because if I touch that unconsciously, I'm going to die. But Scott's telling me I need that because I need to invest that in the business. So you need to go and look at both of those. How do you reconcile one with the other? How do you know? How do you look at that relationship you have with money and see if it's true? Because some of those you. That's your lived experience. But I'm here to tell you, I thought you needed money to make money in real estate. When I realized on our first deal we got seller financing, the owner financed part of the down payment, so we needed less money. And then when I realized that you could syndicate real estate and you can get investors to put money in your deals, I was like, wow, I have all of these beliefs around money that are just false. They're my beliefs, they're things that I learned as a young adult, and I brought them into my adulthood. But if I wasn't there doing the stuff now and challenging those beliefs, I'd still be at that restaurant right now. Scott.
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Yeah, no, I. I spent a lot of time in the restaurant industry. I was there. So, you know, I tell people, call me up and say, hey, look, can you help me get a chick fil A? And I go, well, first of all, I can't because it's not a traditional franchise. And two, why chick fil A? I mean, it's a great model.
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Yes.
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I guess If I was 25, 30 years old, and I wanted to get paid 150 grand a year to run a restaurant, it's great. But as I tell People, you know, you come out of that, and after five, 10 years, you don't own anything.
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No.
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You put in sweat equity. Now, hopefully you have a nice bank account, because you probably won't have any time to spend your money. But.
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Yes. Yeah.
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How much of this is financial responsibility, Gino? And by the way, folks, we're talking to Gino Barbero, who is. His mission through Barbero360 is really to empower families to build the lasting legacies by focusing on restoring traditional values. I guess that's the best way to put it. So how much of this is money? Responsibility. Financial responsibility, Understanding how dollars. You just said, well, I didn't know that I could do this. I didn't know I could do that. So how much of that is you educating people about the opportunities to be responsible with investing, reinvesting, and how to spend the money and save the money?
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It's interesting because I think, you know, the whole school system and the whole society has been dumbed down over the last 50 years. I mean, that's literally why we started homeschooling our kids, because the public school system literally was dumbing kids down, and they weren't teaching kids about things that are important, like, really, how to cook a meal, how to run a household. Right. We're learning about the War of 1812, which is really important. Hey, you know, Britain came and they burned the White House. And who was it at the time? Was it Madison? Madison ran out. That's all important. But if I can't write a check, if I can't balance my checkbook and I don't know what a 401k is, none of the other stuff really matters. That's the reality. So the first step is I. I am so passionate about working with families, especially working with couples, because I think when you see the degradation of what's happened with the household and how families have separated and have the families have broken down, that is what's led to a lot of the problems with money. Because if you don't have a healthy relationship at home, if you don't have a stable foundation at home, and you don't have the ability to teach your kids about money when they go into the world and they learn money from other people, they learn money from Visa, and they learn money from all these other websites, you know, all these budgeting apps and all, it's great, great information, but it's not practical information. So I think for me, if you're a parent out there, I mean, you have to learn about money, and you have to start talking to your kids around money. You have to. To prepare them about money. And for me, that, that, that. That's the most important thing for me is really to have parents sit down and start talking to their kids about money and not, not getting defensive or, you know, criticizing. Getting criticism from your kids because they may say, hey, dad, you know why, you know why. Why are we living in this house? Why can't we afford something better? Don't take it as a criticism. I mean, they're just. They're just curious about money. And I remember growing up, sometimes some of the kids, they would ask, you know, why are we shopping at this store? Well, I can't. I can't afford going somewhere else. Be honest with them, be open with them, but teach them the skills of money. Teach them the rules of money.
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So the person that's in the corporate position just kind of, you know, doesn't like what they do, doesn't like the people they work for. You know, has every excuse in the world. But what I consider to be that complacent optimist, somebody who's just, you know, waiting to get. For it to get better. How do you coach somebody to say, change is good? I mean, how do you just say, hey, look, you've got to get out of your own way and either make the effort to change or you're just going to be a complacent optimist the rest of your life, so to speak. I mean, is. How do you, how do you coach someone like that?
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So you want to get. You want to kick them in the ass? You want to make them do something that they're not even aware that they can do. I think the first thing is, like, how we started off the podcast. I mean, what is, what is there? Maybe they do like their situation, but they just like to complain. I don't want to push them into a business where they think the grass is greener on the other side. Let's really look at the other side and see what the other side goes through. Let's see the sleepless nights and signing the check on the front versus signing the check on the back. I mean, there's a lot of great things about being.
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There is a lot of fear. You know, there's. It's funny, you know, you use the term the grass is greener on the other side. I always like to tell people, like, yes, the grass may be greener on the other side, but you still gotta water the lawn and cut it.
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I like that. And so for them, it's really getting them crystal clear because a lot of these people have never really had any kind of coaching or any kind of personal development. And then you start asking them these questions. And Scott, I see a lot of times people don't even know how to answer these questions because they've never been asked these questions. You know, what does look life look like in three years? What does life look like in five years? What is your, what is your, what are your monthly income goals? Why are you buying this business? What is buying a business going to do for you? Do you have six months of earnings set aside if something goes bad? These are all questions that you need to ask somebody, but ultimately you want to really drill it down to them because you being the coach that you are, you're a great coach. You know that if you ask the right questions, everyone has the answers with within them. The better questions that you can ask somebody, the more space you give them, the better you're able to extract the question that's hidden inside of them. Because a lot of the times, like you said, you keep using that word, fear. We're just afraid of telling the truth. We know the answer. We're just afraid of saying it ourselves. Maybe that person is just doesn't like his job. Maybe he can go find another job. He doesn't have to blow up all of his money. Maybe he hates it, but he loves landscaping. Whatever the case may be, I don't think you need to go and buy a business if you think you hate the corporate world. Maybe there's something within the corporate world that you like, but you really need, you really need to drill down and drill down and see where the pain is and where the frustration, where the anger and where the unhappiness is coming from.
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Yeah, I just think entrepreneurs really have that extra hop in their step. It's something they really want to do. They see the, they, they can see the results. They work, life balance, not having to go to the, you know, the corner office to get permission to take a day off to go watch a soccer game or a football game or whatever. So I think there's a, there's a special drive for entrepreneurs, entrepreneurship. It's not for everybody. Franchising is not for everybody. Real estate's not for everybody. But it's interesting. So just to close this out, what does a happy legacy, what does a happy legacy really look like? I mean, if somebody was going to, if, if 15, 20 years from now, you were going to sit at the table and tell your kids, this is what I did. This is why I did it. This is what has made my life worthwhile living outside of, of course, your kids and, and your wife. But what is a happy legacy look like?
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To me, a happy legacy looks like something that I'm building today with my kids. I don't want to wait 15 years from now and tell them, this is what I built. I want to build it with them. I mean, we're having weekly family rhythms with the kids. We have a family governance. We have core values. We have a mission statement. And when I say we, it's not. I, I am building it with them because I want to impart the knowledge and the wisdom that I have. And there's three parts to it. Most of us focus on the financial part of it, which is really important. We need to teach them about the money, we need to teach them about the stewardship. But there's also the human component of legacy, which is the family itself, the unique genius that each child has along with their spouses. One of my kids loves to do medical massage. Another one loves to work on the farm. Another one works, loves to work on the business. They all have their unique gifts. Let's bring all those gifts within the legacy and within the family. So when they get older, one of them can teach their, you know, their, their, their aunt, their nieces and nephews how to ride a horse and how to milk a cow. Another one can give medical massages to their kids. So the human component is really important. But then you have the intellectual component, which is all the stuff that I'm doing with the other kids as far as teaching them, writing books, doing the podcasts, building the Borrower360 company with the family to teach them how to run a business. So there's financial, human and intellectual. That's what, to me looks like a happy legacy. And you're building it with your family, so you' ultimately just leaving this whole footprint for them. So when they take over, they understand the governance, they understand how to run and operate this whole legacy machine, and they're incorporating the entire family with it, so then they can leave the blueprint for the next generation.
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Wow. Very interesting. Well, Gino, this has certainly been very interesting and, and again, to the audience that's listening, you know, it is a little outside the mainstream, but I think, you know, when you're starting to build an empire, a legacy, you have to have a foundation. It's like anything in life. You know, it's like if you're building a house, you need a foundation. If you're if you're going to go to college, you got to have an education in high school. It's that foundation, whatever. And this is a great way. And again, I circle back, building that foundation, that mindset, mindset, that positive attitude, you know, the comfort of family and kind of everybody on board. So this is great, Gino, maybe you could share with the audience how people can connect with you if they wanted to reach out to learn more, to talk to you, maybe, you know, tap you on the back shoulder and bring you on board for some, some guidance. So what, what's the best way for someone to get a hold of you at this point? Or websites.
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They can just go to genobarboro.com it's my name Gino, last name barbaro.com or they can go to the family website, which is barworld360.com.
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Okay, great. Any closing thoughts? Anything you'd like to share before we say, you know, we, we certainly would like to get you back again.
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I want to plug, I want to. Yeah, I want to plug what you're doing. Because I think buying a franchise, it can be a really great first step for any business owner because we talk about systems, processes, people, you're, you're buying that in a franchise. What I would say to anybody, if you're going to buy a food franchise, if you're going to buy a home services franchise, I would at least buy something that I'm interested in and something that I want to participate in if I love food. And people are saying you shouldn't get into a restaurant, but that's what you love and that's, that's what you want to aspire to. You're going to show up every day and you have to understand that you're in business as a franchisor to create value for the marketplace. And that's what I think franchises do really well. They've understood how to create value for their customers. So you're buying a system or a process. And as an entrepreneur, that's the name of the game. The more value you can create in the marketplace, the more you're going to get rewarded. Hence, the money is just a result of you adding a tremendous amount of value in the marketplace.
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That's great. You. We just did a segment on Rapid Fire Q A, which is a live thing I do on LinkedIn. But one of the questions was competition. And I'm a believer in competition because one of the questions questions was, what about if I'm first to market? Well, in franchising, you have to understand that there's a reason why there's not somebody there selling pizza or painting a house because there may not be a market. Yeah, it's, it's interesting. But, but Gino, once again, thanks very much. I mean I enjoyed the conversation. Like to get you back again, but again, Gino Barbero and it's B A R B A R O. You can also find them on the link LinkedIn as well if you want to connect with again, this is Scott, Scotty Milus, All Things Considered Franchising. You can reach me at Scotty at the franchise the perfect franchise.com or scott@scottmylasfranchisecoach.com you can also check out All Things Considered Franchising on all of your favorite podcast channels. Over 300 episodes so far. We're just getting ready to end our third season. So it's, it's great. But Gino, thanks again. And until next time, folks, this is Scott Scotty Milo saying be well.
