Intrusive Thoughts Explained | Understanding Unwanted Thoughts

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Hello, and welcome to the Anxiety Reset Podcast. I'm Niel
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Robson from Faber Ship Rinth Therapy and in each episode
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we take a straightforward look at anxiety, what is happening,
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what may be keeping it going, and what you can
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begin doing differently to help. This podcast is for education
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and general support. It's not a replacement for medical advice,
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a diagnosis, or individual mental health treatment. So in the
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last episode, we looked at why anxiety can feel worse
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at night when the distractions stop and your attention turns
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towards your thoughts and physical sensations. Today we're talking about
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something that can be particularly frightening. It's intrusive thoughts. These
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are thoughts and image or doubts or urges that enter
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your mind without being invited. They may be strange, upsetting,
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could be embarrassing, and sometimes they're completely out of character.
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Because they feel so uncomfortable, you may start asking yourself,
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you know, why did I think that? What does it
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say about me? What if the thought is important? What
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if it means I secretly want something? What if I
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lose control? You may then spend hours trying to answer
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those questions, But the more you try to reach complete certainty,
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the more important the thought can begin to feel. So
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in this episode, we're going to look at why interrisive
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thoughts become stuck, how are they to get rid of them,
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can accidentally strengthen them, And then we'll look at a
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practical way to respond without getting pulled into a long
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mental argument. So this episode is about unwanted thoughts that
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cause fear and distress. It's not about genuine plans or
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intentions to harm yourself or somebody else. If you feel
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at risk of acting on a thought, you should see
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professional help. Let's begin with what an intrusive thought actually is.
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An intrusive thought is something that appears automatically. You don't
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sit down and consciously decide to create it. It may
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appear as a sentence in your mind. It could be
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a sudden image, could be an uncomfortable doubt, could be
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a memory. We might be a feeling that something terrible
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might happen. And the subject of the thought can vary enormously.
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Some people may become frightened that they might make a
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serious mistake. Some worry that they could cause harm without
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realizing it. Some experience some wanted thoughts about their relationships, health,
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their identity, religion, sexuality. Others become frightened by sudden images
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or impulses that feel completely unlike them. The particular subject
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is not what keeps the cycle going. What usually keeps
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it going is the meaning attached to the thought and
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everything that then happens afterwards. So I imagine you're going
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about your day and a strange thought suddenly enters your mind,
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and for a moment it catches your attention and your
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body reacts. You may feel that feeling. That drop in
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your stomach could be a rush of adrenaline, a tightening
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in your chest, sudden feeling of dread. And your mind
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then says, why did I react like that? And now
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the investigation begins. You replay the thought. You examine how
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it made you feel. You try to remember whether you
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have ever had a similar thought before. You might compare
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it with your values and your past behavior. You might
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search online. You might ask somebody trust to reassure you.
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You may begin to avoid certain people, places, objects, or situations.
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You might replace the thought with a more acceptable thought.
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You may repeat a phrase in your head until you
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feel calmer. You may keep checking your physical reactions to
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see what they mean, and for a short time. One
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of those actions might bring some relief. You might feel better,
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so it appears to have worked. But your mind may
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also learn something from that response. It learns that this
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thought must be important. It learns that when the thought appears,
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you must stop what you're doing and investigate it. And
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because the brain has now marked the thought as important,
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it becomes more likely to check for it again. The
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thought returns, the anxiety returns, and the investigation begins again,
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and this can become a loop, and unwanted thought appears.
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The body reacts, You try to work out what the
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thought means. You check, analyze, avoid, or you seek that
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reassurance and you feel temporary relief. Then the thought returns,
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often with a new question attached to it. The mind
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might say, but what if you miss something? What if
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this time is different? How can you be completely sure?
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This is why logical answers often don't end the problem.
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You may answer one question and the anxiety creates another one.
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You reassure yourself about one detail, but then the mind
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finds a different detail to examine. The problem is no
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longer the original question. The problem is to demand for
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that certainty anxiety wants an answer that leaves no room
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for doubt. But we know that very few things in
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life come with that level of certainty. The more certainty
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you demand, the more uncertain you begin to feel. One
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of the biggest misunderstandings about intrusive thoughts is the belief
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that recovery means preventing the thoughts from ever appearing. And
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that sounds reasonable. Surely, if a thought upsets you, the
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answer must be to get rid of it, right, But
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trying to force a thought out of your mind means
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you must keep checking if it's still there. You might
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tell yourself, I must not think about this. Then a
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few seconds later you check, am I still thinking about it?
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Is it still there? And the moment you check, you've
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brought the thought back into your awareness. You can also
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become frightened by the fact that the thought returned. You
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might think, why am I still having this thought? I
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thought I dealt with it? Does the fact that it
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returned means something? But thoughts can return simply because you've
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trained your attention to look for them. Imagine someone tells
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you that an alarm may go off at any moment,
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even when the alarm is silent. Part of your attention
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remains focused on it. You're listening for it, you're waiting
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for it, and every small sound gets noticed. Intrusive thoughts
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can work in a similar way. You become watchful, You
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scan your mind to see whether the thought is present,
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and that mental scanning keeps it very close to the surface.
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The alternative is not to prove that the thought is harmless.
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It's not to find the perfect sentence that makes you
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feel completely certain, and it's not to replace every uncomfortable
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thought with a positive one. The alternative is to change
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your response, so you begin treating the thought as something
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the mind's produced, rather than as a question that must
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be answered. And that can feel difficult at first because
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the anxiety may still be present. Your nervous system may
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still demand that you do something, but feeling an urge
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to investigate does not mean you have to follow it.
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You could notice the urge without completing the usual response.
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So here's a simple process you can practice. It's notice
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name don't solve return, so we just go through it slowly.
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So first notice an intrusive thought appears and it catches
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your attention, and instead of immediately entering the story, just
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pause for a moment. You don't need to push the
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thought away. You're simply noticing that something has appeared in
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your mind. You might say to yourself, I've noticed a
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distressing thought. The second step in this is to name it. Now.
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You're not naming the detailed content, you're naming the process.
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You might say this is an intrusive thought, or my
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mind is asking for certainty again, or this is the
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anxiety investigation just beginning. But you can keep the label
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simple whatever you feel right. You don't need to repeat
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it until you feel better, because that could become another
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form of reassurance. You say it once and you move on.
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So the third step, don't solve This is often the
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most challenging part. Your mind will offer you questions what
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does it mean, why did it happen? What if it
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comes back? How can I be absolutely sure? So rather
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than arguing with those questions, you can respond, I'm not
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solving this right now, or I'm willing to leave this unanswered,
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or simply maybe maybe not. This doesn't mean you agree
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with the thought. It means you're stepping away from the
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demand to settle it. You're allowing some uncertainty to exist
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without carrying out the usual checking or all reassurance, and
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the fourth step is return. You simply bring your attention
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back to something in the present. Return to the conversation
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you were having, Return to the work you were doing,
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Return to the program you're watching, Return to the feeling
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of your feet against the floor, Return to what you
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can see and hear around you. Now, the thought may
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still be present in the background, and that's fine, but
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you don't have to wait for it to disappear before
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continuing with your day. You're not trying to create a
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perfectly calm mind here. You're practicing the ability to continue
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while the mind still produces noise. So let's try that together.
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You don't need to bring up your most upsetting thought here, okay,
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use a mild worry, or simply imagine that an unwanted
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thought has appeared. So notice what your mind wants you
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to do. Does it want you to analyze it, check
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review a memory search online. Does it want you to
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ask someone for reassurance or replace the thought, or monitor
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how your body reacts. Just notice what urge it brings
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and quietly say to yourself, this is just an intrusive thought.
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I do not need to solve it right now. This
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is just an intrusive thought. I don't need to solve
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it right now. Then bring your attention to the room
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around you. You can notice one thing you can see,
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notice one's sound, Notice the physical support beneath your body,
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and you can take one gentle breath in. Just let
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that go, and then simply return to whatever you were
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doing before the thought interrupted you. Now you may not
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feel immediate relief, and that's really important to understand, because
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the purpose of this exercise is not to make the
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anxiety vanish within seconds. If you use it to check
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whether you feel better, that checking can be part of
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the same cycle. The aim is to teach your mind
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that you can experience an unwanted thought without entering into
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an investigation about it. You're practicing a new response, and
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new responses become more natural through repetition. So at first
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the thought may return quickly. The mind might say, but
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you still haven't answered the question, and you can respond
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in the same way, I know I'm leaving it unanswered.
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Then return your attention again. A minute later, the thought
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may return. There is that thought again, I'm not solving
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it right now, and you return again. And this repetition
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is the practice. Each time you choose not to check
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or argue, or neutralize or seek certainty. You're showing the
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brain that the thought does not require an emergency response.
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It's also important to recognize that compulsions are not always visible.
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When people hear the word compulsion, they may imagine repeated
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ham washing or checking locks or arranging things. But compulsions
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can also happen entirely inside the mind. You may mentally
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review a conversation. You may test your memory. You may
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replay an event to make sure nothing happened. You might
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monitor your feelings. You might try to replace a bad
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image with a good one. You might repeat reassuring phrases.
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You might be comparing people with yourself. You may repeatedly
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search for the correct explanation all the time. And because
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these actions happen silently, they can be difficult to recognize.
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But the useful question is what am I doing in
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response to this thought? And does it give me short
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term relief but keep me coming back from more certainty?
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And this does not mean you must suddenly stop every
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response perfectly turning it into another rule can create more pressure.
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Just begin by noticing one part of your usual pattern.
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Perhaps you delay checking for five minutes. Perhaps you avoid
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searching online for one answer. Perhaps you allow one question
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to remain unfinished. Perhaps you return to your activity even
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though you don't yet feel completely settled. Small changes matter,
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and remember that thoughts do not have to feel unimportant
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before you treat them as unimportant. You may still feel anxiety,
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the thought may still feel urgent, but you can choose
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not to organize your behavior around that agency. Feelings can
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be present without being in charge. The thought can be
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present without becoming the center of your day. So when
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intrisive thoughts are frequent, very distressing, take up a great
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deal of time, or lead to repeated check in or avoidance,
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they can sometimes form part of obsessive compulsive disorders, usually
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known as OCD. That doesn't mean everyone who experiences an
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intrusive thought has OCD, but if this pattern is interfering
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with your work and sleep, or relationships or normal activities,
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it's worth speaking til GP or a qualified mental health professional.
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OCD is not simply being tidy or liking things in
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a particular order. It can involve painful, unwanted thoughts and
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exhausting attempts to gain relief or certainty. Effective treatment is available,
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particularly CBT that includes exposure therapy and response prevention, usually
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shortened to ERP. That process helps people face intrusive thoughts
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and uncomfortable uncertainty while gradually reducing the compulsive responses to
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keep the cycle going. You don't have to diagnose yourself
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and you do not need to manage severe symptoms alone.
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Just for now, remember the full parts of today's reset.
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Notice name, don't solve. Return. Notice that the thought has appeared.
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Name the process without analyzing the content, Allow the question
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to remain unanswered, Then return your attention to the life
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happening around you. The aim is not to win an
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argument with the thought. The aim is to stop giving
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the argument all of your time and attention. An intrusive
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thought may feel loud, it may feel urgent, it may
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create a strong physical reaction, but you can gradually learn
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that you do not have to respond to every thought
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your mind produces. So thank you for listening to the
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Anxiety Reset podcast. I'm Neil Robson from Favershion Hypnotherapy and
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you can find more episodes and short anxiety videos on
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the YouTube and TikTok. You can search for the Anxiety
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Reset or follow at the Anxiety reset One. You can
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also email the podcast at anxietyreset one at gmail dot com.
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So for information about hypnotherapy for anxiety and sleep, visit
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Faversham Hypnotherapy. In the next episode, we look at reassurance
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why it can make you feel better for a few minutes,
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but leave anxiety asking the same question again later, so
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until they remember you don't have to answer every thought.
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You don't have to achieve complete certainty. Notice it, name it,
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leave it unanswered, and return to the present moment. Thank
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you for listening.