WEBVTT
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Well, welcome back to Caffeinated Connections
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with your host, Caleb McCartney. As you hear
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in the background, we got our guests from the
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wonderful band, the one, the only, Dream the
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Heavy. And, uh... Keycards, please. Oh, you'd
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be surprised. We don't have captions on this.
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Or, uh, what is it? Time cards, right? But yeah,
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got these two wonderful people from Dream the
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Heavy. And it is a pleasure to have them on.
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How are you guys doing? Pleasure to be here.
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Caleb, how did we meet? Do you want to tell them?
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Well, it was quite, you know, no pun intended,
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a shot in the dark. I ended up photographing
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them at Haven. If you guys don't know what Haven
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is, it's a wonderful... venue that you can go
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out listen to some music on a weekend and some
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wonderful bands play played and play for everyone
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and it is what like 10 bucks 15 bucks 10 15 bucks
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the the people at haven are uh friends of ours
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within the music scene as well and to have have
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that represented have have them representing
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the community in and of itself is is pretty special
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it's not something that you normally would get
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anywhere in any large city. And once again, it
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just showcases how important Pittsburgh is and
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how it is able to curate art and music in a way
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that is unique and just to ourselves and just
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to within our community. So to have Haven there,
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to have you represent with your photography,
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and there was a ton of photographers there that
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evening. The bands were wonderful. Quick shout
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out to Eli of Wild Blue Yonder, to Zoltan and
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to Benito. Benito did a great job. So yes, yeah,
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we had probably one of the, easily one of our
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most memorable shows that night. And we were
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very fortunate to have you there with your eye
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to capture a lot of that. So thank you. And yes,
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that's how we met. And I know that. yourself
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and TK have fostered a nice little relationship
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going forward. So I'm honored to be here and
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being able to witness what's going to be going
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on. And the guy that just talked, well, on the
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podcast episode, you'll see a picture of him
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probably pulled from one of my photos of him
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looking like really rad with the beard and all
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that. And then I'll throw TK in as well. Yeah.
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That'd be nice. But yeah, you don't want too
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much showboating. No, not too many people like
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to look at TK. I agree. They like to stare at
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TK. It's not a glance. It's more of a basilic
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kind of like Medusa thing. Oh, yeah. It is not.
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Caught in the headlights. Quite literally, that
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one girl that I got a photo of, she was right
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underneath you, TK. Right underneath you. She
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looked like she was caught in the headlights,
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but she was not moving. That was a very lively
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audience. Good connections that night. Absolutely.
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Like connecting to the crowd. It was a wonderful
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space, man. Which is the most important thing
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too. With Dream the Heavy, that's one of our
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main things is to connect to the crowd. So there's
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no barrier between art and community. We want
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everybody to come in and hug and just kind of
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like, and the love on one another because that's...
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That's where everything feels special. That's
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true. That's what Pittsburgh is, the city of
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brotherly love. That's Philadelphia. Take it.
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We're so close. What is it? We're also the city
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with the most bridges. Even though they say Paris
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is, we have three more than them. Boom. Parisians.
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Pittsburgh does have a lot of love. The artist
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community in Pittsburgh has always been fantastic.
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I've always said that it's a playground. where
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they want you to come in and play. It's not a
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competition. It's, oh, you do this too? Oh, you
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have to meet. Oh, you should show here. Oh, I
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got to turn you on to this. So the more you go
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out into the arts in Pittsburgh, you'll start
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seeing the same people, and you'll start seeing
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this great community that stems back for decades.
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And that's the other thing when I first moved
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here for the arts. I noticed that there was no
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age barrier. It was... And the only thing that
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connected was intellect. You connected to the
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intellect and the interest. And everybody came
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in on an equal playing field. It was wonderful.
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It is wonderful. It is wonderful. Respect. Mm
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-hmm. Lived in San Francisco as well. And when
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we moved out there, I was looking for that same...
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and it was definitely more competition out there.
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Great art, good people, but you had to break
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through to get to the people. It was definitely
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a competition. It was business out there. There's
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a lot of... I'd run there, so I'll speak on it.
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It's a lot of backstabbing, but it's a friendlier
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way. It's competitive, but in order to get...
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And in order to get into the places that really
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matter, you have to push yourselves endlessly.
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Not unlike what you have to do here, but it's
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much more venomous. Here there is an amount of
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care and an amount of admiration for everybody
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who's creative. And it's on a much, much larger
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loving scale. I grew up there. It's where I'm
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from. I love San Francisco. I love the East Bay.
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I love Oakland. But I've never been as well received
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as I have been since moving here. Oh, yeah. As
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a Cali kid, I mean, I completely understand that
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trying to break through. I mean, I was I was
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still an artist, but I was a Play -Doh artist.
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You know, I took it back to the Play -Doh days
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of being eight years old and doing that in Legos,
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probably. So I really wasn't the artist. So there
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was a lot more competition out there. But even
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just looking at L .A., looking at San Jose and
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all these other places, breaking through that
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barrier of entry is so much harder than Pittsburgh.
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It's uninviting. And I think that's what Pittsburgh
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is, is it's willing to receive you for who you
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are. And for what you can create as opposed to
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what you can give me, what you can do for me.
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So it's, and this is coming from me. I am, I
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am born and raised there. That is my home. I
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love the East Bay immensely. I have family. I
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have friends. I have enemies. I have people there
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that I will cherish and love and respect forever.
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And they're still struggling. And most of them
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had to just stop. Because it got to a point to
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where either it wasn't making money. They fell
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out of favor as far as popularity. The venues
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change so often. And it just becomes difficult.
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That being said, I'll always love it. I'll always
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respect it. I feel far more welcomed and appreciated
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within the Pittsburgh community. Because I could
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just be me. There was always like, you know,
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there was always a click involved. And I became
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really susceptible to it. And I immersed myself
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into that. And looking back in a retrospective
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manner, I realized that me trying to be cool,
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I was really not. I was just absolutely swamped.
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and just being, how can I put this? You cared
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more about the audience than yourself? I didn't
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care about the audience. Oh. I didn't care. It
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was great to have it there. The tribe? But it
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wasn't even the tribe. You know what it was?
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It was me trying to prove that I was worthy.
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And I feel like that's San Francisco in a nutshell,
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is just always out there trying to prove yourself.
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And when you do, then everybody kind of, you
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get bought out. Whereas I feel like within Pittsburgh,
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there's more of a, there's more, what's the word
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I'm looking for, TK? Je ne sais. Je ne sais pas.
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A little thing, I don't know what. A little,
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I don't know what. I don't know. The sourdough
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bread is really sour in San Francisco. I don't
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mind being salty in Pittsburgh. The thing that
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I find often is you will get a little bit of
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clickiness in Pittsburgh, but at the end of the
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day, it is very, I mean, the way I look at Pittsburgh
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is it's like the heartthrob that isn't toxic.
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Respect. It's a genuine love for one another.
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And when you find that crew, it's not only come
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on in, it's come on in, have a biscuit, have
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a chicken leg, and we're going to send you home
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with food as well. Yes. Bros used to go for every
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night. That's kind of like how our, that is exactly
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how our experience at Haven was. So to kind of,
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you know, come full circle on that, certainly
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go to that place. And it's really nice to see
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musicians support one another like that and within
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that fashion as well. It's the most counter,
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counter competitive environment where it's not
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competitive at all. And it's like, holy crap,
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you're sitting there in a green room and it's
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like. everyone's just kind of vibing and hanging
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out and having a good time. And it's not like
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quite literally the playground, you know, go
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back to kindergarten. It's, you know, who, who,
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who the fuck cares who you are. Okay. He said
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it or they did it. And so I was, I was, I wanted
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to see who was going to break the hymen first.
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It is. Thank you. It is. Okay. Um, yeah. So,
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um, I, no, no, I'm going to hold back. My children
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may listen to this and I don't need them to learn
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new curse words. But yeah, you nailed it perfectly.
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I mean, no one should really care who you are
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as long as you're not an asshole. And when it
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comes to like, rather you make music, rather
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you make, I mean, art, music. I mean, I was a
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musician in middle school when I had a lead pencil
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band, when I would tap the pen and annoy the
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hell out of my, what is it, Spanish? No, not
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Spanish. We hated her. She was a math topics
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teacher. Honestly, it wasn't geography that I
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hated. I hated geometry. And she was very big.
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She's like the area, the area, the area. I said,
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I really don't give a fuck what area you have.
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And we would annoy the hell out of her by tapping
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our lead pencil and just doing it so fast or
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so loud. So that that little twang, it really
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brought out her rage. And it was the lead pencil
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band. It was the lead pencil band. And it was
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so worth it. And lead pencil rebellion. Is that
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the that was the Ticonderoga players, right?
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I think that's what that was. Oh, the Lead Pencil
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Rebellion. That's the newest band coming to a
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city near you. Let's hope not. Maybe they can
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sell it all. But no, I mean, the art, whether
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you're playing lead pencils or just starting
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out art very early on, whether you're eight years
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old listening to this or you're 62. I think art
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is this way of coping with reality. It's this,
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it's, I mean, literally it is the human condition
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put into something. True. I mean, and that's
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another thing why robots can't do it. That's
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great. It's, it's, you, you get, I, do you feel
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with the whole AI thing coming around that it's
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just a little, even in the, even with their flaws,
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I feel like when, when humans make flaws with
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an art, it still has a organic appeal. And I
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think that's, that's my main thing with AI is
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that it just doesn't have that organic flaw,
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that organic flaw. And I think they could, I'm
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not going to give anybody any ideas, but yeah,
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I think organic flaws are worth it. Whether it's
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in painting, sculpture, music, in any sort of
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art. I think that that is absolutely necessary.
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I believe the pursuit of perfection. is drastically
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overrated. My art, my creative has always been
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primarily music. Growing up, listening to the
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really poorly mixed... half eaten cassette tapes
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by the dead Kennedys or even by public enemy.
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It just, it, it made me appreciate that because
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it also, but because your tape could get eaten
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up at any minute, it was also temporary. You,
00:13:31.909 --> 00:13:34.049
you didn't know how long you had with that sort
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of thing, which I think is an important thing
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of art too, is like, it is temporary within you
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because you will move on. You will, you will
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find another, another avenue for that. Man, I
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could just go on all day about this. It fosters
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growth. It does foster growth. You make a good
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point because that's another thing that I, like,
00:13:53.210 --> 00:13:56.330
at, what, 16, 17 years old, I came to the terms
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that I couldn't listen and hear and read everything
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that I could in my lifetime. And it was like,
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oh, my God, what should I listen to? And you're
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having this midlife crisis. 16? Yeah. Holy shit.
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Well, you've got to realize, too. Being raised
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with the library of Alexandria in your pocket,
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I didn't really wrap my brain around that. You're
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saying you can have this existential crisis of
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I could only hold so much information. I only
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have so much time. I have access to everything.
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How do I spend my time? That's really brilliant.
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It's really brilliant. And I'm impressed that
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you even had this moment. Like the thing is,
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since then has been nothing but intentional pursuit
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of brilliant, not even just an intentional pursuit
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of knowledge, but an intentional curiosity of
00:14:51.919 --> 00:14:54.860
knowledge of new things. So what I actually do
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is I ask a friend for a playlist that's so different
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from mine every year. And I say, give me your
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music. And I listen to that rather. I hate it.
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So much, and I don't understand what they're
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saying, because I learned about techno -neo -pop.
00:15:07.779 --> 00:15:10.720
Okay. And it is, it's an entirely different genre,
00:15:10.799 --> 00:15:13.279
and there's King Lizard and the Seven Wizard.
00:15:13.600 --> 00:15:15.980
King Gizzard and Lizard Wizard. Something like
00:15:15.980 --> 00:15:19.059
that. They are, they are, they're there. They're
00:15:19.059 --> 00:15:21.480
there. Them and Uncle Acid and the Dead Beats
00:15:21.480 --> 00:15:24.700
are kind of like what I'm kind of gravitating
00:15:24.700 --> 00:15:26.860
around. But I digress. Go ahead. But no, when
00:15:26.860 --> 00:15:29.240
it comes to like, you have to, I think that when
00:15:29.240 --> 00:15:31.340
it comes to consuming something in the modern
00:15:31.340 --> 00:15:35.120
age, We have the Library of Alexandria in our
00:15:35.120 --> 00:15:38.799
pocket. And there's two ways of thinking that
00:15:38.799 --> 00:15:43.220
kind of two people, I cannot quote them, but
00:15:43.220 --> 00:15:46.500
there's one thinking that there's too much information,
00:15:46.600 --> 00:15:49.340
so I don't want to interact with any of it. Or
00:15:49.340 --> 00:15:52.500
there's, so there's, I don't know which one is
00:15:52.500 --> 00:15:55.580
right, which one's correct. So I don't know where
00:15:55.580 --> 00:15:58.840
to go. So it's the paralysis by analysis, or
00:15:58.840 --> 00:16:02.720
it's you're so overwhelmed that you don't, you
00:16:02.720 --> 00:16:04.360
don't want to pick one, so you don't pick any.
00:16:04.500 --> 00:16:08.019
And it's a problem because I can't imagine these
00:16:08.019 --> 00:16:11.779
kids that are, you know, I don't think we prepare
00:16:11.779 --> 00:16:19.600
the next generation for what is accessible. I've
00:16:19.600 --> 00:16:22.000
witnessed, having kids of my own, I've witnessed
00:16:22.000 --> 00:16:29.120
my teenage daughter. Go in circles in and around
00:16:29.120 --> 00:16:33.899
music, in and around theater, in and around movies,
00:16:34.080 --> 00:16:37.539
plays. It seems to be, and this could be just
00:16:37.539 --> 00:16:40.600
an influence of what I have over her, and I'm
00:16:40.600 --> 00:16:43.779
not attributing that, but she gravitates to the
00:16:43.779 --> 00:16:48.320
same stuff at her age that I did when I was a
00:16:48.320 --> 00:16:50.460
little older than what she is now. In your jeans.
00:16:50.759 --> 00:16:54.019
I mean, the things she's listening to and the
00:16:54.019 --> 00:16:56.490
things that she's creating. are things that speak
00:16:56.490 --> 00:16:59.090
to her and i find that that is exactly what spoke
00:16:59.090 --> 00:17:02.070
to me and i'm certain that that energy and then
00:17:02.070 --> 00:17:06.890
that that that chaos spoke to my parents so i
00:17:06.890 --> 00:17:09.529
think there's avenues there so yes analysis paralysis
00:17:09.529 --> 00:17:12.029
is like the worst thing you can have as a musician
00:17:12.029 --> 00:17:14.930
or an artist or an artist however i think if
00:17:14.930 --> 00:17:17.650
you can answer what's put in front of you and
00:17:17.650 --> 00:17:20.289
allow the universe to kind of direct you and
00:17:20.289 --> 00:17:22.809
channel you through these things then it becomes
00:17:22.809 --> 00:17:25.480
easier And if you have friends like you have
00:17:25.480 --> 00:17:27.460
and you're willing to experiment and you're willing
00:17:27.460 --> 00:17:33.940
to step outside of the box and not be so boxed
00:17:33.940 --> 00:17:40.000
in with perfection and embrace something that
00:17:40.000 --> 00:17:43.839
makes you uncomfortable, holy shit, are you going
00:17:43.839 --> 00:17:46.339
to grow. Not only grow, but you're going to benefit.
00:17:46.579 --> 00:17:49.200
You're going to benefit from it. And I think
00:17:49.200 --> 00:17:52.470
that's what makes. A lot of musicians, a lot
00:17:52.470 --> 00:17:55.849
of artists. I think that that is that is the
00:17:55.849 --> 00:17:59.089
sun that creates the photosynthesis for us to
00:17:59.089 --> 00:18:04.349
grow. Hear, hear. In all of this overwhelming
00:18:04.349 --> 00:18:11.230
ability to access the all. At the same time,
00:18:11.309 --> 00:18:15.599
you have to you need a counterbalance. And there's
00:18:15.599 --> 00:18:18.059
more Eastern philosophy being integrated into
00:18:18.059 --> 00:18:21.180
our world in the Western society than ever. Thank
00:18:21.180 --> 00:18:26.640
goodness. And so through this, as this onslaught
00:18:26.640 --> 00:18:30.460
comes, if you can be conscious of your breath,
00:18:30.660 --> 00:18:32.960
be conscious of what your heart's doing, be conscious
00:18:32.960 --> 00:18:37.660
of where that, your emotions are your barometer.
00:18:38.039 --> 00:18:40.779
And that's the only way to weed out all the bullshit.
00:18:41.609 --> 00:18:43.529
You know what I mean? You really have to just
00:18:43.529 --> 00:18:48.930
breathe, calm, get that static. Find a way to
00:18:48.930 --> 00:18:50.789
remove the static because there's more static
00:18:50.789 --> 00:18:56.589
than ever. But everybody aligns at their own
00:18:56.589 --> 00:18:58.829
frequency and resonance and their own little
00:18:58.829 --> 00:19:00.930
radio station, if you will. They pick up and
00:19:00.930 --> 00:19:03.569
they align with what comes naturally. So if you
00:19:03.569 --> 00:19:06.089
can get all that static out of the way, you can
00:19:06.089 --> 00:19:10.170
really focus in on your path. By your little
00:19:10.170 --> 00:19:12.470
beacons that are being thrown to you, you know,
00:19:12.509 --> 00:19:15.509
and keep growing and keep growing and be conscious
00:19:15.509 --> 00:19:17.849
of all the things that there is nothing wrong.
00:19:18.029 --> 00:19:20.869
There's no bad. There's, you know, just it's
00:19:20.869 --> 00:19:23.490
just information. So the things that that make
00:19:23.490 --> 00:19:26.630
you upset. Great. Know why they make you upset.
00:19:26.730 --> 00:19:29.730
The things that make you, you know, erotic. Know
00:19:29.730 --> 00:19:32.650
why it makes you erotic. All of these things
00:19:32.650 --> 00:19:34.569
follow your bliss, like Joseph Campbell said.
00:19:34.789 --> 00:19:37.730
But nothing is wrong. Just it's all information.
00:19:38.430 --> 00:19:41.930
Breathe through it and keep moving forward. Like
00:19:41.930 --> 00:19:44.589
you said, got to move past that analysis paralysis.
00:19:45.329 --> 00:19:49.190
When it comes, you mentioned like this idea of
00:19:49.190 --> 00:19:52.769
going past the static. What I found often is
00:19:52.769 --> 00:19:57.369
we sometimes get stuck in these rooms of TV static.
00:19:57.670 --> 00:20:00.849
And we surround ourselves with these rooms of
00:20:00.849 --> 00:20:04.069
TV static because sometimes it's more, chaos
00:20:04.069 --> 00:20:09.619
is easier if we're used to it. And so how I'm
00:20:09.619 --> 00:20:11.539
sure we've all encountered that. How have you
00:20:11.539 --> 00:20:16.619
both kind of gotten away, tried to reconstitute
00:20:16.619 --> 00:20:20.859
this familiarity of static and try to go away
00:20:20.859 --> 00:20:24.880
from it and find healthier avenues? You make
00:20:24.880 --> 00:20:28.440
mistakes. Allow the mistakes. You allow the mistakes.
00:20:28.619 --> 00:20:36.079
You can. As much as you want to. bypass and get
00:20:36.079 --> 00:20:38.400
to the positive you have to stumble you have
00:20:38.400 --> 00:20:41.039
to do that so the static in itself is just as
00:20:41.039 --> 00:20:44.480
important as as the clarity right so this is
00:20:44.480 --> 00:20:46.660
chaos magic we're talking about chaos is fantastic
00:20:46.660 --> 00:20:49.019
there it is yeah it's all the realm of possibilities
00:20:49.019 --> 00:20:54.400
but um it's funny growing up when i uh there
00:20:54.400 --> 00:20:58.019
were literally there was a television on in every
00:20:58.019 --> 00:21:01.420
room and if there wasn't a television on in the
00:21:01.420 --> 00:21:05.099
room there was a radio on And it's really fascinating.
00:21:05.819 --> 00:21:10.440
So much so that when I started living on my own,
00:21:10.500 --> 00:21:12.940
I needed to fall asleep to television because
00:21:12.940 --> 00:21:17.099
it was my comfort. And because that was my sign
00:21:17.099 --> 00:21:19.740
that somebody else was alive in the house was
00:21:19.740 --> 00:21:22.279
if I heard a TV on in the other room. It's really
00:21:22.279 --> 00:21:25.440
fascinating. I psychoanalyze this. I think a
00:21:25.440 --> 00:21:27.579
lot of my generation still deal with that because
00:21:27.579 --> 00:21:31.220
the thing was when I was younger, I had to have
00:21:31.220 --> 00:21:34.369
a TV on and fall asleep to. I need like pitter
00:21:34.369 --> 00:21:36.930
patter of a cat or something because there's
00:21:36.930 --> 00:21:38.750
something weird in our current society where
00:21:38.750 --> 00:21:41.809
silence is scary. It's deafening. It's quite
00:21:41.809 --> 00:21:45.549
literally deafening. And there is something that
00:21:45.549 --> 00:21:49.109
I have learned recently with no longer being
00:21:49.109 --> 00:21:51.670
in a relationship of there is peacefulness in
00:21:51.670 --> 00:21:55.470
silence. And as a photographer, there's the dark
00:21:55.470 --> 00:21:58.829
room where you quite literally are in the dark.
00:21:59.029 --> 00:22:04.819
And there's a story here that. So when I started
00:22:04.819 --> 00:22:07.519
The Dark Room, I was so confident. I was prideful.
00:22:07.680 --> 00:22:10.880
I thought I was hot shit. And I go into The Dark
00:22:10.880 --> 00:22:13.119
Room. I'm the first one in. I have the film in
00:22:13.119 --> 00:22:14.559
my camera. And I'm like, I'm going to do this
00:22:14.559 --> 00:22:16.539
first try. This is going to be easy. Ten minutes.
00:22:16.660 --> 00:22:21.220
Flat. It wasn't ten minutes. Four hours later.
00:22:23.220 --> 00:22:26.720
It wasn't ten minutes. It was about an hour.
00:22:27.119 --> 00:22:30.240
I was in The Dark Room. And this was right after
00:22:30.240 --> 00:22:34.480
a breakup. Holy shit. I was in that dark room.
00:22:34.519 --> 00:22:37.759
It felt like a century. And not only that, but
00:22:37.759 --> 00:22:40.480
you can't give up. You're in the dark. You open
00:22:40.480 --> 00:22:43.240
that door. That is a failure. That is a true
00:22:43.240 --> 00:22:46.799
failure. So being able to work through your failure
00:22:46.799 --> 00:22:50.799
in the literal dark and trying not to beat yourself
00:22:50.799 --> 00:22:53.720
up as an artist. This is an art. You know, you
00:22:53.720 --> 00:22:55.859
took these photos. You cared so much. You cared
00:22:55.859 --> 00:22:57.900
so deeply about this. And, you know, you're like,
00:22:57.980 --> 00:22:59.880
I'm a hot shit. I can do this. And you're in
00:22:59.880 --> 00:23:03.319
there alone. with your camera and you can't see
00:23:03.319 --> 00:23:06.920
anything and you can only feel so one of one
00:23:06.920 --> 00:23:09.119
to two of your senses are turned off the silence
00:23:09.119 --> 00:23:11.819
is quite literally deafening and i remember sitting
00:23:11.819 --> 00:23:15.359
there with the film in my hand and i'm not i
00:23:15.359 --> 00:23:17.480
don't know what i'm i do know what i'm doing
00:23:17.480 --> 00:23:19.559
but i didn't know what i was doing to where i
00:23:19.559 --> 00:23:24.299
had to calm myself and realize oh well i just
00:23:24.299 --> 00:23:27.220
do this and looking at things from a logical
00:23:27.220 --> 00:23:30.140
standpoint as to an emotional standpoint is where
00:23:30.140 --> 00:23:34.299
it starts. Because I can tell you, being in a
00:23:34.299 --> 00:23:37.900
room, a dark room, alone, for that long, maybe
00:23:37.900 --> 00:23:41.059
it wasn't an hour, but it felt like days. And
00:23:41.059 --> 00:23:45.660
you start to realize, holy shit, this is not
00:23:45.660 --> 00:23:49.039
that big of a deal. But I think often our minds
00:23:49.039 --> 00:23:52.079
will go to a point where it's panic. It's panic.
00:23:52.160 --> 00:23:56.119
We will panic because we are afraid of that uncomfortableness.
00:23:57.539 --> 00:23:59.500
daunting fear that we're alone and that we have
00:23:59.500 --> 00:24:01.099
to figure it out all on ourselves. And we do,
00:24:01.140 --> 00:24:03.519
we do have to do it all on ourselves. And that's
00:24:03.519 --> 00:24:05.160
the fun of adulting. That's what I've found out.
00:24:05.380 --> 00:24:08.259
Yeah. Fear is the unknown, you know, and if you,
00:24:08.279 --> 00:24:11.680
if the more, the more, uh, tools you have to
00:24:11.680 --> 00:24:13.779
get through that, like you said, you know, that,
00:24:13.880 --> 00:24:16.200
that you can just rely on for the moment. Who
00:24:16.200 --> 00:24:19.079
was it that said, um, with the treasure you seek
00:24:19.079 --> 00:24:24.099
most is in lies in the cave that you fear most.
00:24:25.039 --> 00:24:28.019
You know, it's like you have to go in literally
00:24:28.019 --> 00:24:30.259
to that silence. You have to remove yourself
00:24:30.259 --> 00:24:33.460
from everything you know so that you can get
00:24:33.460 --> 00:24:38.119
to what you were born knowing and get back to
00:24:38.119 --> 00:24:40.740
yourself. And that's what every religion talks
00:24:40.740 --> 00:24:43.000
about, that rebirth into self, you know, rebirth
00:24:43.000 --> 00:24:45.799
and rebirth and rebirth. You know, dying and
00:24:45.799 --> 00:24:48.019
living, dying while living, dying while living.
00:24:48.240 --> 00:24:51.319
You know, it's what we kind of do, especially
00:24:51.319 --> 00:24:54.619
as artists. Oh, my gosh. Every what? And I think
00:24:54.619 --> 00:24:56.700
that that's actually like, like, I think that's
00:24:56.700 --> 00:25:02.960
why artists stay. But, well, it's an impulsive
00:25:02.960 --> 00:25:05.839
bliss. And, you know, because you're constantly
00:25:05.839 --> 00:25:09.440
killing yourself and dying and rebirthing. You're
00:25:09.440 --> 00:25:10.960
trying new things. You're trying new things.
00:25:11.000 --> 00:25:12.980
You're trying new things. You're always young
00:25:12.980 --> 00:25:15.559
at heart because nothing is ever good enough
00:25:15.559 --> 00:25:20.400
because it's good enough. Now it's not because
00:25:20.400 --> 00:25:23.400
you've conquered it. And now, the next dragon
00:25:23.400 --> 00:25:26.619
to slay, and the next shedding of the skin. It's
00:25:26.619 --> 00:25:29.579
a life of fascination. And curiosity as well,
00:25:29.660 --> 00:25:31.579
because I think... It's how to stay young. I
00:25:31.579 --> 00:25:33.000
mean, not only that, but... Be fascinated with
00:25:33.000 --> 00:25:35.480
life. I think that's the thing that a lot of
00:25:35.480 --> 00:25:37.500
people talk about, where it's like, oh, you know,
00:25:37.519 --> 00:25:40.599
if the kid dies in you, the younger kid that
00:25:40.599 --> 00:25:45.099
you are at heart, if that dies, then, you know,
00:25:45.099 --> 00:25:48.759
kiss the rest of your life goodbye. As I usually
00:25:48.759 --> 00:25:51.440
say, because it's like... You have to have this
00:25:51.440 --> 00:25:56.299
childish sense of curiosity and wonder. And we
00:25:56.299 --> 00:25:59.079
have to make sure that we balance that with the
00:25:59.079 --> 00:26:02.380
naivety of that child, where sometimes we go
00:26:02.380 --> 00:26:05.500
in and we think one thing and we have to humble
00:26:05.500 --> 00:26:08.240
ourselves. And sometimes it bites us in the ass,
00:26:08.240 --> 00:26:14.039
quite literally. Yep. It's good. It's good. It's
00:26:14.039 --> 00:26:16.980
good. This is the strangest life I've ever known
00:26:16.980 --> 00:26:20.079
and I wouldn't trade it for. Wouldn't trade it
00:26:20.079 --> 00:26:22.720
for the world. And you mentioned, you know, staying
00:26:22.720 --> 00:26:26.000
young. I think a lot of people, like everyone
00:26:26.000 --> 00:26:28.640
I've talked to, they're like, I'm like, guess
00:26:28.640 --> 00:26:30.779
how old he is? And everyone's just like, 30,
00:26:30.900 --> 00:26:34.259
20. You're not, are you? No, you could add those
00:26:34.259 --> 00:26:40.839
together. Yeah. I didn't even mean it. Yeah.
00:26:41.779 --> 00:26:43.920
I've been inhabiting this body for over half
00:26:43.920 --> 00:26:47.309
a century. That's... I don't understand. And
00:26:47.309 --> 00:26:49.569
I look to inhabit it for another... Another 50.
00:26:49.750 --> 00:26:54.509
And then a couple more bodies. Yeah. I don't
00:26:54.509 --> 00:26:57.089
know. I mean, I do know how you do it as an artist.
00:26:57.190 --> 00:26:59.869
I mean... We just explained it. Yeah. It really...
00:26:59.869 --> 00:27:02.869
It's... You know, being an artist isn't something
00:27:02.869 --> 00:27:05.250
that you just want to be when you grow up. You
00:27:05.250 --> 00:27:07.670
just are. I really... I just think you just...
00:27:07.670 --> 00:27:10.509
You... It's a blessing and a curse. Quite literally.
00:27:10.569 --> 00:27:14.470
The body will die before the artist does. Quite
00:27:14.470 --> 00:27:16.690
literally, you know, we have to retire from what
00:27:16.690 --> 00:27:19.849
you love. No, no. You know, there's there's there's
00:27:19.849 --> 00:27:25.289
people who lose an ability. They lose, lose something,
00:27:26.210 --> 00:27:29.029
lose an ability to create. They just go on. They
00:27:29.029 --> 00:27:32.069
find another medium to it. And that's that's
00:27:32.069 --> 00:27:35.170
what a creative person will do. If you lose your
00:27:35.170 --> 00:27:38.589
eyes, maybe you go back into music. If I lose
00:27:38.589 --> 00:27:41.559
my hands. Perhaps I go into photography or I
00:27:41.559 --> 00:27:43.839
do something. We will always find something.
00:27:43.920 --> 00:27:46.799
And the fortunate thing is with technology and
00:27:46.799 --> 00:27:48.619
everything that has advanced, we can always find
00:27:48.619 --> 00:27:54.480
an outlet for that. So yeah, the creative side
00:27:54.480 --> 00:27:59.400
that is directly linked to the hopeful youth
00:27:59.400 --> 00:28:03.539
energy within you is something that will pass
00:28:03.539 --> 00:28:07.359
on and pass along long after the flesh is gone.
00:28:08.140 --> 00:28:10.920
Is that Johnny Cash lyric? It's ministry after
00:28:10.920 --> 00:28:13.359
the flesh. Is that after the flesh? After the
00:28:13.359 --> 00:28:20.140
flesh. But you're absolutely right, Caleb. That's
00:28:20.140 --> 00:28:23.319
something that just doesn't diminish. The desire
00:28:23.319 --> 00:28:30.720
to be heard, the desire to be seen as a creative
00:28:30.720 --> 00:28:33.539
person, regardless of your medium and regardless
00:28:33.539 --> 00:28:37.730
of your whatever. That doesn't go away. And I
00:28:37.730 --> 00:28:42.069
think that's why a lot of people who inhabit
00:28:42.069 --> 00:28:46.710
that light and that energy leave a little early.
00:28:46.869 --> 00:28:51.549
Because sometimes it's overwhelming. And to compensate
00:28:51.549 --> 00:28:57.230
for success, to compensate for anxieties, we
00:28:57.230 --> 00:29:00.769
turn to things that are detrimental to the human
00:29:00.769 --> 00:29:05.849
form. So with the longevity thing. And speaking
00:29:05.849 --> 00:29:09.069
on, you know, TK and myself, we're certainly
00:29:09.069 --> 00:29:13.710
in that half century thing. And people are, especially
00:29:13.710 --> 00:29:19.150
with TK, are mesmerized and astonished when they
00:29:19.150 --> 00:29:22.309
find out how long he's been around. They said
00:29:22.309 --> 00:29:26.849
that it's unfair. They could do it too. That's
00:29:26.849 --> 00:29:28.950
what I was going to get at. It's like, you know,
00:29:28.970 --> 00:29:36.369
be a... That's how to lead is just show possibilities.
00:29:36.710 --> 00:29:39.170
Like every artist that I've always been mesmerized
00:29:39.170 --> 00:29:41.470
with, every musician, every sculptor, anyone
00:29:41.470 --> 00:29:44.430
who considered themselves an artist, dance, poetry,
00:29:44.609 --> 00:29:47.569
they show you that it's possible because it didn't
00:29:47.569 --> 00:29:51.730
exist until they were the conduit for it. And
00:29:51.730 --> 00:29:54.869
it already existed, to be honest with you. That's
00:29:54.869 --> 00:29:57.210
why I say like inhabiting this form. Everything
00:29:57.210 --> 00:30:01.250
exists. It just needs plucked from. The ether.
00:30:01.390 --> 00:30:03.630
A little self -actualization. Self -actualization.
00:30:03.829 --> 00:30:06.150
And I think people who... That too. But every
00:30:06.150 --> 00:30:08.490
artist, we're all conduits to it. Yeah. And we're
00:30:08.490 --> 00:30:10.849
all like radio stations to it. It's what do you
00:30:10.849 --> 00:30:14.569
bring and what do you share as proof to pudding,
00:30:14.690 --> 00:30:17.349
baby? I think a lot of it has to be attributed
00:30:17.349 --> 00:30:22.990
to how happy you are with what you're able to
00:30:22.990 --> 00:30:26.329
do as well. Because if you're not, if you're
00:30:26.329 --> 00:30:29.500
always pursuing... The next thing the next thing
00:30:29.500 --> 00:30:31.359
next thing and you're not completely happy with
00:30:31.359 --> 00:30:34.279
what you've done before and allow that to kind
00:30:34.279 --> 00:30:37.380
of be what it is with with all its mistakes then
00:30:37.380 --> 00:30:41.940
you become a cannibal and you start to to literally
00:30:41.940 --> 00:30:45.339
eat yourself away the art the art part of you
00:30:45.339 --> 00:30:47.559
starts to eat itself away and that starts to
00:30:47.559 --> 00:30:49.599
go and then you become a thief because then you're
00:30:49.599 --> 00:30:51.640
trying to just replicate and steal from what
00:30:51.640 --> 00:30:58.980
you were in your experiences prior. Those, those,
00:30:59.039 --> 00:31:00.559
you have to be able to leave those footprints
00:31:00.559 --> 00:31:03.640
behind in order to continue and you will find
00:31:03.640 --> 00:31:08.220
new, new and more adventurous things. Um, so
00:31:08.220 --> 00:31:10.839
in order, in order to progress and in order to
00:31:10.839 --> 00:31:13.099
stay and to have a good longevity at doing these
00:31:13.099 --> 00:31:15.599
things, you do have to say, you have to be willing
00:31:15.599 --> 00:31:18.140
to say goodbye to a few things as well. And I
00:31:18.140 --> 00:31:20.519
think saying goodbye to that allows you to grow.
00:31:20.640 --> 00:31:23.759
It allows your body to replenish, allows your
00:31:23.759 --> 00:31:28.180
spirit to go. Uh, and. it keeps you loose because
00:31:28.180 --> 00:31:31.140
once you start to get too rigid, then it kind
00:31:31.140 --> 00:31:33.819
of, then that's when you start to atrophy your
00:31:33.819 --> 00:31:37.119
creative spark starts to dwindle. That's, that's
00:31:37.119 --> 00:31:40.660
where you lose yourself. That's a good point.
00:31:40.839 --> 00:31:43.279
And you make a very good point. And I was going
00:31:43.279 --> 00:31:47.299
to get into it. Perfect transition from when
00:31:47.299 --> 00:31:51.180
it comes to being an artist, we're going to not,
00:31:51.240 --> 00:31:53.279
we're going to get into a creative rut that,
00:31:53.319 --> 00:31:56.180
that shit happens. Yeah. And. You make a very
00:31:56.180 --> 00:31:57.859
good point. That is literally what you're describing,
00:31:57.980 --> 00:31:59.960
this idea of you're making, you're making, you're
00:31:59.960 --> 00:32:01.440
in a good flow, and then all of a sudden you
00:32:01.440 --> 00:32:03.359
hit not only a curb, but you're just kind of
00:32:03.359 --> 00:32:06.019
stuck. And then you start to lose a part of yourself.
00:32:06.359 --> 00:32:12.480
Yes. How do you guys work through a creative
00:32:12.480 --> 00:32:13.960
rut? Because, I mean, I'd love to talk on that
00:32:13.960 --> 00:32:15.980
too, but I'd love to hear your guys' point. Do
00:32:15.980 --> 00:32:19.180
you have something? I have one thing. You mentioned
00:32:19.180 --> 00:32:23.160
it before. You find comfort in the silence. When
00:32:23.160 --> 00:32:25.420
you find comfort in the silence. then you hear
00:32:25.420 --> 00:32:29.980
what's being said to you. Yes. So once you start
00:32:29.980 --> 00:32:36.019
realizing that the creative process is like breathing
00:32:36.019 --> 00:32:42.039
and you need to, and there's a pause and you
00:32:42.039 --> 00:32:46.099
bring it in and then you gestate and then you
00:32:46.099 --> 00:32:48.460
release. There's always those moments afterwards.
00:32:48.740 --> 00:32:53.599
It's the seasons. You need that downtime. Or
00:32:53.599 --> 00:32:56.640
you burn too quickly. You burn out. You have
00:32:56.640 --> 00:32:59.779
to have that replenishment. So when those so
00:32:59.779 --> 00:33:03.180
-called creative ruts or writer's block, if you
00:33:03.180 --> 00:33:07.680
allow yourself to rest, all of those, you know,
00:33:07.700 --> 00:33:09.900
everything that you planted and put out there,
00:33:09.980 --> 00:33:11.799
those seeds are in the air. They're going to
00:33:11.799 --> 00:33:14.619
come and land again if you just stop blowing
00:33:14.619 --> 00:33:18.380
hot air and just let it settle. Just let it settle.
00:33:18.460 --> 00:33:21.619
They'll hit the soil again. and they're going
00:33:21.619 --> 00:33:23.819
to spring a new shit you couldn't even imagine
00:33:23.819 --> 00:33:28.720
because at some point you do have to listen.
00:33:29.140 --> 00:33:31.759
You have to open your eyes to what's around you
00:33:31.759 --> 00:33:34.619
again because it's so easy to get wrapped up
00:33:34.619 --> 00:33:37.579
into what your creative spirit, what you're birthing,
00:33:37.599 --> 00:33:40.740
what you're birthing. It's so fun. Oh, it's intoxicating.
00:33:41.359 --> 00:33:45.299
Believe it or not, I'm not that. I have a very.
00:33:45.920 --> 00:33:48.079
If I didn't have to leave the studio, I wouldn't.
00:33:48.079 --> 00:33:50.460
I like I have a very happy home life. My studio
00:33:50.460 --> 00:33:53.359
is in my house. My family's in my house. It's
00:33:53.359 --> 00:33:56.099
great. The band comes now to the studio. Like
00:33:56.099 --> 00:33:58.200
if I didn't have to leave the mothership, I wouldn't
00:33:58.200 --> 00:34:03.400
accept it to share. Yeah. But so I could I'm
00:34:03.400 --> 00:34:08.280
I do fall praying to not leaving my studio. But
00:34:08.280 --> 00:34:10.840
there's those moments you have to allow yourself
00:34:10.840 --> 00:34:13.599
to rest. You have to allow yourself to sleep
00:34:13.599 --> 00:34:16.480
when you need to sleep so that you can wake up
00:34:16.480 --> 00:34:20.360
and birth again. These Indras, you know, is this
00:34:20.360 --> 00:34:23.719
sleep and birth, sleep and birth. Oh, that's
00:34:23.719 --> 00:34:26.579
a huge thing to sleep. I just learned that myself
00:34:26.579 --> 00:34:29.780
after, you know, the last two weeks, three weeks,
00:34:29.800 --> 00:34:34.260
like I graduate in two weeks and it's exciting
00:34:34.260 --> 00:34:37.420
and scary. Not only that, but I had my thesis
00:34:37.420 --> 00:34:42.179
last week. Which I was privy to be at, and the
00:34:42.179 --> 00:34:45.260
work looked fantastic. Thank you. Oh, man, as
00:34:45.260 --> 00:34:47.199
soon as you came up the steps, your work was
00:34:47.199 --> 00:34:50.440
right there, and it set everything up. It was
00:34:50.440 --> 00:34:55.239
beautiful. Andy would have been proud. It's just
00:34:55.239 --> 00:34:59.840
gorgeous work. And so it tapped into our time
00:34:59.840 --> 00:35:02.989
as well. And your write up was great. So congratulations
00:35:02.989 --> 00:35:06.590
on a beautiful thesis. You achieved it. Thank
00:35:06.590 --> 00:35:10.849
you. I truly appreciate it. It's you know, I've
00:35:10.849 --> 00:35:12.989
talked about it briefly, but on the podcast.
00:35:13.010 --> 00:35:16.869
But really, you know, that has been nothing but
00:35:16.869 --> 00:35:18.530
anxiety because it's you know, you're making
00:35:18.530 --> 00:35:22.449
a work not because you want to share it, not
00:35:22.449 --> 00:35:24.110
only because you want to share it with others,
00:35:24.210 --> 00:35:26.510
but you're afraid of its reception and you're
00:35:26.510 --> 00:35:29.679
afraid of, you know, what. Because at the end
00:35:29.679 --> 00:35:32.599
of the day, art and culture, art influences culture,
00:35:32.719 --> 00:35:35.719
culture influences art. So the thing is, as we
00:35:35.719 --> 00:35:39.420
jump into it, the work itself is very poignant.
00:35:39.500 --> 00:35:45.219
It's very. Cumulative of the time, and it's scary
00:35:45.219 --> 00:35:48.679
because not only do I think it's good because
00:35:48.679 --> 00:35:52.019
I'm very prideful of it, but I had sleepless
00:35:52.019 --> 00:35:54.980
nights because of it, because there is this,
00:35:55.000 --> 00:35:57.630
you know, this. you know, prove yourself kind
00:35:57.630 --> 00:35:59.429
of mentality, even when you're a college student.
00:35:59.670 --> 00:36:02.150
Well, you got to, to your professor, especially,
00:36:02.349 --> 00:36:04.449
there's numbers that are going to come after
00:36:04.449 --> 00:36:05.829
it. You know what I mean? You're going to be
00:36:05.829 --> 00:36:09.530
graded on it. So you have to, you have a, you
00:36:09.530 --> 00:36:12.949
have one judge. Yeah. That lives outside of yourself
00:36:12.949 --> 00:36:17.150
now. That you have to win over. You have to win
00:36:17.150 --> 00:36:18.630
yourself first and then you have to win over
00:36:18.630 --> 00:36:22.469
this one judge. I still have school anxieties.
00:36:22.610 --> 00:36:24.789
I went to art school and I have school anxiety.
00:36:24.909 --> 00:36:28.369
Far more fearful than am I going to be accepted?
00:36:28.789 --> 00:36:32.349
Because did you feel like you had to, with the
00:36:32.349 --> 00:36:34.130
anxiety and everything that built around that
00:36:34.130 --> 00:36:38.090
and producing your thesis and having a specific
00:36:38.090 --> 00:36:41.070
person to kind of impress and to judge you upon
00:36:41.070 --> 00:36:43.929
that, when you've created art in other instances.
00:36:44.409 --> 00:36:48.670
Did you feel like your thesis was far more stressful?
00:36:49.610 --> 00:36:51.750
And do you think that, and second part, do you
00:36:51.750 --> 00:36:55.230
think that that stress propelled you to push
00:36:55.230 --> 00:36:58.769
yourself into a more creative position? Initially,
00:36:58.769 --> 00:37:02.989
it wasn't. The thesis started out me trying to
00:37:02.989 --> 00:37:05.449
prove a point, and it was an entirely different
00:37:05.449 --> 00:37:07.730
point. But what I realized, it was less about
00:37:07.730 --> 00:37:10.829
proving a point to others and more about me.
00:37:11.710 --> 00:37:14.409
Congratulations. And beautiful. And it's the
00:37:14.409 --> 00:37:19.389
process during it was staring at staring me in
00:37:19.389 --> 00:37:22.670
the face because I was, you know, I woke up,
00:37:22.710 --> 00:37:26.690
wanted to be at an event at a rally. And I was
00:37:26.690 --> 00:37:29.130
like, during politics. And I said, what the fuck?
00:37:29.130 --> 00:37:31.630
Why not? Why not? And I kept doing it, doing
00:37:31.630 --> 00:37:34.789
it, doing it. I missed multiple classes. And
00:37:34.789 --> 00:37:37.590
it was like it was so weird. Hey, can I can I
00:37:37.590 --> 00:37:40.570
get class off? I'm going to Obama's rally and
00:37:40.570 --> 00:37:42.489
I'm going to be taking photos of him. I know
00:37:42.489 --> 00:37:46.230
it sounds like an excuse, but like I am. Yeah.
00:37:46.329 --> 00:37:49.550
And I just did all this. And I it really at a
00:37:49.550 --> 00:37:53.809
certain point I got to a reflection where I sit
00:37:53.809 --> 00:37:57.150
in the car and I'm like driving miles and hours
00:37:57.150 --> 00:38:01.119
just to. Cross my fingers and hope and hope that
00:38:01.119 --> 00:38:03.820
I get and hope that I do this. And it wasn't
00:38:03.820 --> 00:38:07.260
to prove myself. It wasn't there was no anxiety
00:38:07.260 --> 00:38:09.579
there. It was what the fuck? This is this is
00:38:09.579 --> 00:38:13.139
fucking crazy. I can do it. And eventually I
00:38:13.139 --> 00:38:15.480
started to kind of come to terms with myself
00:38:15.480 --> 00:38:17.940
of like, I don't have to prove shit to anyone.
00:38:18.519 --> 00:38:21.739
And none of us do. None of us have to prove shit
00:38:21.739 --> 00:38:24.440
to anyone aside from ourself of who the hell
00:38:24.440 --> 00:38:28.340
are you and what are you waiting for? Worthy.
00:38:28.670 --> 00:38:31.369
That was something that Paul mentioned earlier
00:38:31.369 --> 00:38:36.389
of the anxiety in the arts community in the Bay
00:38:36.389 --> 00:38:40.250
Area that he felt, am I worthy? And that's something
00:38:40.250 --> 00:38:43.469
that I've been trying to come to grips with in
00:38:43.469 --> 00:38:46.250
my adult life. And I've solved them through the
00:38:46.250 --> 00:38:48.570
silence and through affirmations in the silence
00:38:48.570 --> 00:38:51.289
for it to have self -esteem. Because I learned
00:38:51.289 --> 00:38:53.829
later in life that I had crippling anxiety over
00:38:53.829 --> 00:39:01.679
my own self -esteem. Learning that is what propels
00:39:01.679 --> 00:39:06.239
art in an honest fashion. The realization of
00:39:06.239 --> 00:39:11.079
because you can conceive it, it's worthy. Because
00:39:11.079 --> 00:39:14.300
it hits you, your barometer this way, your emotional
00:39:14.300 --> 00:39:18.280
barometer this way, your bliss factor, that's
00:39:18.280 --> 00:39:20.239
what makes it worthy. And what's fascinating
00:39:20.239 --> 00:39:24.840
is you start realizing that you are the only
00:39:24.840 --> 00:39:30.800
one ever. to experience it this way. And if you're
00:39:30.800 --> 00:39:36.360
strong enough to share your only ever moment
00:39:36.360 --> 00:39:40.320
with others, good on you. That's worthy. That
00:39:40.320 --> 00:39:43.619
is life worthy. That's what we all strive for.
00:39:43.780 --> 00:39:46.440
Some people do it through children. Yeah. We're
00:39:46.440 --> 00:39:48.880
artists. We birth children on a daily basis.
00:39:48.940 --> 00:39:52.599
So good on you. And they're worthy. To tag onto
00:39:52.599 --> 00:39:57.789
that, I feel, playing in Dream the Heavy, That
00:39:57.789 --> 00:39:59.909
is what I think the collective consciousness
00:39:59.909 --> 00:40:03.230
of all five of us is. Let's, let's give what
00:40:03.230 --> 00:40:06.590
we have in our unique way in order to share it.
00:40:06.630 --> 00:40:10.130
So everybody else can experience their unique
00:40:10.130 --> 00:40:12.570
way of experiencing us. So that way it just becomes
00:40:12.570 --> 00:40:15.369
this just wonderful thing. It just becomes quite
00:40:15.369 --> 00:40:19.550
a cycle. Yeah. And that's that. I think that's
00:40:19.550 --> 00:40:24.170
the biggest mission of what we are as a band
00:40:24.170 --> 00:40:27.760
is to make it not to make sure. but to give our
00:40:27.760 --> 00:40:32.920
best effort in order to bring everybody in, to
00:40:32.920 --> 00:40:39.260
not exclude anybody. There are so, so many wonderful
00:40:39.260 --> 00:40:47.760
humans of every religion, gender, everybody.
00:40:48.280 --> 00:40:51.739
We want everybody. But I just kind of want the
00:40:51.739 --> 00:40:55.090
cool people myself, though, too. I just, I kind
00:40:55.090 --> 00:40:56.789
of want the other people. No assholes allowed.
00:40:57.110 --> 00:41:01.449
I'm kind of over it. I'm really over it. I want
00:41:01.449 --> 00:41:07.750
people there who can put things in perspective
00:41:07.750 --> 00:41:13.849
and realize that this is our moment. This is
00:41:13.849 --> 00:41:19.949
what we do. We want you to be with us. That's
00:41:19.949 --> 00:41:22.869
kind of the dream, the heavy. mission spearheaded
00:41:22.869 --> 00:41:28.130
by by tk but also uh our our you know our our
00:41:28.130 --> 00:41:31.150
keyboard player myself our drummer our guitar
00:41:31.150 --> 00:41:33.710
player and even the person who's filling in for
00:41:33.710 --> 00:41:37.210
our guitarist right now it really is a collective
00:41:37.210 --> 00:41:41.090
to where we just want to hug we don't want to
00:41:41.090 --> 00:41:43.929
we don't want to alienate we just want people
00:41:43.929 --> 00:41:48.150
to put aside their bullshit and open their mind
00:41:48.150 --> 00:41:53.250
to an avenue where they're not... How can I say
00:41:53.250 --> 00:42:00.289
this? Put away the horse shit. Put away your
00:42:00.289 --> 00:42:05.590
fucking ego. There it is. Fucking... Allow. Be.
00:42:06.570 --> 00:42:10.269
Let's just... Be human. Let's just all have that
00:42:10.269 --> 00:42:13.250
energy. Let's all have that... Vulnerability?
00:42:14.130 --> 00:42:17.210
Isn't that such a beautiful word? Yep. It is
00:42:17.210 --> 00:42:20.630
that vulnerability of, I think there's a huge
00:42:20.630 --> 00:42:23.429
thing, not even just I think, I know there is
00:42:23.429 --> 00:42:26.730
this fear of vulnerability in our current society,
00:42:26.969 --> 00:42:30.269
especially the Western world. Oh, yeah. That's
00:42:30.269 --> 00:42:35.849
changing. I think it's changing. Right now, it's
00:42:35.849 --> 00:42:38.909
so in your face. I really hope this is the death
00:42:38.909 --> 00:42:41.010
rattle of it. That I think it's the death rattle
00:42:41.010 --> 00:42:44.309
of it. I really do. It is like the death rattle
00:42:44.309 --> 00:42:48.909
of... of restrictions of misogyny of just restrictions
00:42:48.909 --> 00:42:54.349
um of of uh duality yeah i think i think the
00:42:54.349 --> 00:42:57.710
realization that duality is and doesn't exist
00:42:57.710 --> 00:43:01.610
um this is the death rattle You make a very I
00:43:01.610 --> 00:43:04.170
love this quote. I'm going to coin it myself.
00:43:04.710 --> 00:43:07.550
Binary bullshit. Binary bullshit. And it's this
00:43:07.550 --> 00:43:10.190
idea that things are never going to be yes or
00:43:10.190 --> 00:43:12.449
no. It's there's there's it's a spectrum of things.
00:43:12.550 --> 00:43:16.210
And it should be if everybody is allowed. OK,
00:43:16.309 --> 00:43:20.170
if everybody stays, this is what they were born
00:43:20.170 --> 00:43:25.070
as. These are all perfect shaped cogs to an amazing
00:43:25.070 --> 00:43:28.480
machine. That nature is built. If everybody just
00:43:28.480 --> 00:43:31.420
stays exactly who they're born as, wow, they
00:43:31.420 --> 00:43:34.940
all fit together and solve all the problems by
00:43:34.940 --> 00:43:37.739
being exactly who they are. But that's perfectionism.
00:43:37.760 --> 00:43:42.679
That's allowing somebody to be born and stay
00:43:42.679 --> 00:43:46.579
as their unique self. Learn from each other.
00:43:46.659 --> 00:43:51.920
Work together. But please share your self, the
00:43:51.920 --> 00:43:56.300
self, into the all. Anyway, instead of tribalism
00:43:56.300 --> 00:44:01.380
and not enough or, you know, snowflake and all
00:44:01.380 --> 00:44:07.639
this bullshit, that's duality. And that's really
00:44:07.639 --> 00:44:10.900
restricting the human spirit, you know, that
00:44:10.900 --> 00:44:15.380
is only here for a hot minute. You know, we aren't
00:44:15.380 --> 00:44:20.380
these bodies. We are our consciousness. This
00:44:20.380 --> 00:44:24.429
is just a moment for our consciousness. You typically
00:44:24.429 --> 00:44:27.170
get 73 revolutions. Why are you wasting that
00:44:27.170 --> 00:44:30.610
time? Yeah, like worrying about somebody else.
00:44:30.710 --> 00:44:34.730
Why are you wasting your time? Why are you wasting
00:44:34.730 --> 00:44:39.750
your time on being boxed in and being so rigid
00:44:39.750 --> 00:44:44.650
and so just stoic? Like, this is the way. Be
00:44:44.650 --> 00:44:50.389
the Tao. Yeah. In a river, you have water and
00:44:50.389 --> 00:44:54.210
you have rocks. One of my best friends, Kamal,
00:44:54.309 --> 00:44:56.449
put this to me. In the river, you have water
00:44:56.449 --> 00:45:00.690
and you have rock. I choose to flow. Yes, yes.
00:45:00.849 --> 00:45:03.389
I choose to keep moving. I choose to not stay
00:45:03.389 --> 00:45:06.130
and collect sediment and collect moss. I choose
00:45:06.130 --> 00:45:08.849
to continue to go and to prosper and to find
00:45:08.849 --> 00:45:12.630
other avenues and other channels. That is my
00:45:12.630 --> 00:45:15.449
thought process and has been since Kamal has
00:45:15.449 --> 00:45:20.449
brought it up to me. So meeting TK, TK reassures
00:45:20.449 --> 00:45:26.909
me. That I'm doing well by being water. My wife
00:45:26.909 --> 00:45:29.050
reassures me that I'm doing well by being water.
00:45:29.090 --> 00:45:31.889
I get to see my children. My children reassure
00:45:31.889 --> 00:45:35.190
me. Meeting people like yourself reassures me
00:45:35.190 --> 00:45:38.369
that it's perfect to be the water. You know,
00:45:38.389 --> 00:45:42.030
the rock just kind of sits there. And it's cool,
00:45:42.150 --> 00:45:46.130
and it's heavy, and it's grounding. But the spirit
00:45:46.130 --> 00:45:48.989
isn't supposed to be that. It's affected by everything
00:45:48.989 --> 00:45:51.340
else. It's affected by... Thank you. Thank you.
00:45:51.840 --> 00:45:54.940
And to tag on to what we were saying, we want
00:45:54.940 --> 00:46:01.659
everybody to be involved with us. And that's
00:46:01.659 --> 00:46:04.500
the driving factor of being able to create with
00:46:04.500 --> 00:46:07.719
these five people is we all have different avenues.
00:46:07.900 --> 00:46:10.619
We all have different experiences. We all have
00:46:10.619 --> 00:46:12.420
different genres. We all have different mindsets.
00:46:12.860 --> 00:46:16.659
But to have everybody come in and have a collective
00:46:16.659 --> 00:46:20.869
that comes together to work towards this. is
00:46:20.869 --> 00:46:24.269
is nothing short of remarkable and to be able
00:46:24.269 --> 00:46:29.010
to get on podcasts and to be able to talk to
00:46:29.010 --> 00:46:32.590
people in the audience and and and become more
00:46:32.590 --> 00:46:36.250
than just the relationship of an artist or a
00:46:36.250 --> 00:46:40.610
musician and an audience member we want we want
00:46:40.610 --> 00:46:44.769
family we don't we we when i say hey come to
00:46:44.769 --> 00:46:47.730
a next show and say hi god damn it come fucking
00:46:47.730 --> 00:46:51.239
say hi Come say hi. We're not people that are
00:46:51.239 --> 00:46:53.719
going to be like, we're not going to scoot you
00:46:53.719 --> 00:46:55.460
away. We want to know how you've been. We want
00:46:55.460 --> 00:46:59.500
to know what's creating you. We are very genuinely
00:46:59.500 --> 00:47:02.840
interested. And to some people, it's hard to
00:47:02.840 --> 00:47:06.559
because there's that anxiety and that fear that
00:47:06.559 --> 00:47:08.659
we're not going to accept you. We're going to
00:47:08.659 --> 00:47:15.519
fucking accept you. It's a beautiful situation
00:47:15.519 --> 00:47:21.280
that we're in. As far as a creative collective.
00:47:21.960 --> 00:47:24.519
So the more people we can bring into this. And
00:47:24.519 --> 00:47:27.940
the more it can become yours too. It's not unto
00:47:27.940 --> 00:47:32.659
ourselves. The whole cliche of like. Once you
00:47:32.659 --> 00:47:35.920
release a song. It no longer belongs to you.
00:47:35.940 --> 00:47:37.880
It belongs to the world. That is absolutely true
00:47:37.880 --> 00:47:40.860
with every piece of art. Because everybody's
00:47:40.860 --> 00:47:42.400
going to interpret it their own way. Everybody's
00:47:42.400 --> 00:47:44.199
going to move in their own way. So to kind of
00:47:44.199 --> 00:47:48.170
bring it all back. Come say hi. Come, come be
00:47:48.170 --> 00:47:51.710
with us. You, you are, you are welcome. You are
00:47:51.710 --> 00:47:56.849
worthy of, of love. You are worthy of everything
00:47:56.849 --> 00:48:02.030
that you possibly want. So I, I, I feel fortunate
00:48:02.030 --> 00:48:07.090
enough to have somebody who reminds me on a weekly
00:48:07.090 --> 00:48:10.969
or daily basis that that is, that's what it is.
00:48:11.070 --> 00:48:14.920
So I, I, you know, thank you to TK. My wife does
00:48:14.920 --> 00:48:17.300
it as well. So I'm very fortunate to have that.
00:48:17.340 --> 00:48:21.179
And I hope that folks listening have somebody
00:48:21.179 --> 00:48:25.880
there in order to kind of reassure. But also,
00:48:25.980 --> 00:48:32.300
if you don't, say hi to us. We want to see other
00:48:32.300 --> 00:48:34.780
people's art. And I think if you talk to the
00:48:34.780 --> 00:48:37.280
majority of other people we've played with or
00:48:37.280 --> 00:48:40.219
performed with, they'll say the same thing. You
00:48:40.219 --> 00:48:46.309
know, it's something we put out there. Yeah,
00:48:46.469 --> 00:48:48.750
I don't know. Come to Pittsburgh. Come to Pittsburgh.
00:48:48.929 --> 00:48:50.570
Yeah, come to Pittsburgh. Come to Pittsburgh.
00:48:50.690 --> 00:48:53.190
We'll have the next summer of love. It was San
00:48:53.190 --> 00:48:56.949
Francisco, and now it's Pittsburgh. Here we are.
00:48:57.489 --> 00:49:01.210
One last question for you both. What is your
00:49:01.210 --> 00:49:04.849
guys' preferred caffeinated beverage, as I guess
00:49:04.849 --> 00:49:07.929
the scientists call it? Or what is it, your preferred
00:49:07.929 --> 00:49:11.949
way of caffeinating yourself or getting up? Yes.
00:49:13.449 --> 00:49:17.530
I love caffeine. Coffee in the morning. I don't
00:49:17.530 --> 00:49:21.090
mind any drink if I need it. I like matcha. I
00:49:21.090 --> 00:49:25.630
like give a mate. I like caffeine. I like the
00:49:25.630 --> 00:49:29.610
stimulant. Was it something that you always got
00:49:29.610 --> 00:49:32.030
into or was it just, well, everyone else is doing
00:49:32.030 --> 00:49:39.150
it? Yes. I learned coffee in college. I learned
00:49:39.150 --> 00:49:41.929
coffee actually in Pittsburgh more than Baltimore.
00:49:42.730 --> 00:49:44.630
Now that I think about it, I was, I was drinking
00:49:44.630 --> 00:49:47.710
coffee as a, as a child. I was, as my grandmother,
00:49:47.829 --> 00:49:49.849
as my grandmother was sitting around the table,
00:49:49.849 --> 00:49:52.289
smoking cigarettes, I was just sipping coffee.
00:49:52.429 --> 00:49:55.150
And I, I grew fond of black coffee. Oh, really
00:49:55.150 --> 00:49:58.210
quick. Oh, I love the stuff. It's, it's horrendous,
00:49:58.210 --> 00:50:01.230
but it is, it, it works. And then as, as time
00:50:01.230 --> 00:50:03.250
went on, I found other things that were a little
00:50:03.250 --> 00:50:07.309
bit stronger than coffee. Um, but I, that's,
00:50:07.309 --> 00:50:09.309
that's always been my, my kind of go -to. I do
00:50:09.309 --> 00:50:14.179
love a, uh, I love a. freshly brewed espresso
00:50:14.179 --> 00:50:17.460
as well. Not like the Starbucks bullshit, right?
00:50:18.179 --> 00:50:25.420
Starbucks coffee and Subway sandwiches have the
00:50:25.420 --> 00:50:28.679
same kind of vibe where everything tastes the
00:50:28.679 --> 00:50:31.480
same and it all tastes like the packaging. So
00:50:31.480 --> 00:50:35.179
the Starbucks cups has a particular smell and
00:50:35.179 --> 00:50:36.920
the coffee tastes like that. They'll never sponsor
00:50:36.920 --> 00:50:40.159
me. I don't want Starbucks. I don't want them
00:50:40.159 --> 00:50:45.219
either. No, no. I don't think Subway does sponsor
00:50:45.219 --> 00:50:48.219
me either. There was a thing where this guy was
00:50:48.219 --> 00:50:55.719
sponsored by Subway. You know that word. I like
00:50:55.719 --> 00:50:58.380
caffeine. I enjoy caffeine. There's times where
00:50:58.380 --> 00:51:03.679
I... am very liberal with it um but yeah i coffee
00:51:03.679 --> 00:51:07.679
coffee any specific brand like local uh you know
00:51:07.679 --> 00:51:11.840
what i was i i loved black forge when it was
00:51:11.840 --> 00:51:15.460
here black forge coffee was was incredible grim
00:51:15.460 --> 00:51:21.699
wizard's good um i did like zeke's uh but i'm
00:51:21.699 --> 00:51:25.820
not too versed on what is local right now The
00:51:25.820 --> 00:51:29.500
one coffee, there's a cat fight coffee. My wife
00:51:29.500 --> 00:51:33.559
has a subscription to it, and it's delicious.
00:51:33.719 --> 00:51:38.659
I also do enjoy Pete's Alameda Roast, which I
00:51:38.659 --> 00:51:43.400
found was the town that I, between Alameda and
00:51:43.400 --> 00:51:46.480
Oka, were entitled to. I grew up in, and so Pete's
00:51:46.480 --> 00:51:49.519
Coffee made a specific Alameda blend. It reminds
00:51:49.519 --> 00:51:52.900
me of that. It takes me back to that. TK makes
00:51:52.900 --> 00:51:56.059
a great cup of coffee. Hi, there's something
00:51:56.059 --> 00:51:59.760
that TK does where he throws in, let me try to
00:51:59.760 --> 00:52:03.400
remember, cinnamon. I'll do a crunch press. Cinnamon,
00:52:03.579 --> 00:52:07.539
cayenne, turmeric, a little bit of ginger. And
00:52:07.539 --> 00:52:10.579
then you sometimes will put like a, is it almond
00:52:10.579 --> 00:52:15.619
milk or oat milk? A coconut milk or, oh no, a
00:52:15.619 --> 00:52:19.019
chocolate almond. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And
00:52:19.019 --> 00:52:23.280
a coriander. Coriander. TK's partner also does
00:52:23.280 --> 00:52:26.400
it. Yeah. Well, yeah, there's health benefits
00:52:26.400 --> 00:52:28.739
to turmeric and to ginger root and to cinnamon.
00:52:29.179 --> 00:52:32.460
It's like, really, if I'm going to do it. Something
00:52:32.460 --> 00:52:34.960
I started putting in my smoothies lately, too,
00:52:35.059 --> 00:52:38.400
is kind of getting into that. Good. Yeah. Yeah,
00:52:38.400 --> 00:52:42.480
yeah, yeah. 100%. Do you get, where do you get
00:52:42.480 --> 00:52:44.960
your grounds? Your grounds? To be honest, no.
00:52:47.179 --> 00:52:48.659
To answer the question, I've been doing a lot
00:52:48.659 --> 00:52:51.119
of matcha lately, and literally I get what I
00:52:51.119 --> 00:52:56.380
can. And I drink matcha throughout the day in
00:52:56.380 --> 00:53:00.099
coconut milk and some monk fruit just to sweeten
00:53:00.099 --> 00:53:05.260
it, and ginger root. But espresso, no, I get
00:53:05.260 --> 00:53:08.500
those. It's nothing local, unfortunately, but
00:53:08.500 --> 00:53:11.619
it's that awesome classic yellow brick, that
00:53:11.619 --> 00:53:13.820
Italian yellow brick that you see in the grocery
00:53:13.820 --> 00:53:18.010
store. The Favostello? Yeah. That is glorious
00:53:18.010 --> 00:53:21.889
tea. So that's what I make. Yeah. Yes. It is
00:53:21.889 --> 00:53:24.750
good. It worked perfectly. Right. So that's what
00:53:24.750 --> 00:53:27.969
I use. But then, so then I add a big spoonful
00:53:27.969 --> 00:53:33.050
of natural cacao. The bitter stuff, right? It's
00:53:33.050 --> 00:53:35.730
real bitter. Espresso. But then I add the cacao
00:53:35.730 --> 00:53:40.590
and I doctor it. So you don't have the - You
00:53:40.590 --> 00:53:45.230
want to taste? Yeah, sure. So that is cinnamon
00:53:45.230 --> 00:53:49.769
cacao. That brick and a little... That's not
00:53:49.769 --> 00:53:52.530
sweet. I don't think the sweet heads at Starbucks
00:53:52.530 --> 00:53:55.190
like that, they would not. But it's pretty good.
00:53:55.250 --> 00:53:57.429
That's sweet to me. Does Miss Mundock procure
00:53:57.429 --> 00:54:00.969
these for you as well? No, I do this. You do
00:54:00.969 --> 00:54:04.829
this. I do this and I share that. She doesn't
00:54:04.829 --> 00:54:08.409
do the espresso the same way. I overdo mine.
00:54:08.690 --> 00:54:11.789
Hers I keep simple with the cacao and the chocolate.
00:54:12.670 --> 00:54:14.650
you know, do a little mocha. She's been getting
00:54:14.650 --> 00:54:17.269
into the espresso more. She doesn't do the matcha.
00:54:17.429 --> 00:54:19.789
She doesn't really like that. But as far as the
00:54:19.789 --> 00:54:21.829
French press that I'd make at home, I make it
00:54:21.829 --> 00:54:24.730
for the house. Do you combine the espresso with
00:54:24.730 --> 00:54:29.510
the matcha? I have, just out of... Dirty matcha?
00:54:30.210 --> 00:54:34.849
Necessity. I have. Yeah. Yeah, like a matcha
00:54:34.849 --> 00:54:37.210
cat. Yeah, I have. Dirty matcha. I'll do that
00:54:37.210 --> 00:54:39.289
with yerba mate as well. I don't even know what
00:54:39.289 --> 00:54:41.079
these things that you're saying. Yerba mate is
00:54:41.079 --> 00:54:44.659
like that. It's more like quadriceps are involved
00:54:44.659 --> 00:54:48.639
with it, I think, a little bit too. We're hyper
00:54:48.639 --> 00:54:50.780
-scientific over here, aren't we? You brought
00:54:50.780 --> 00:54:56.000
up caffeine. Remember that his answer was yes.
00:54:56.039 --> 00:54:59.679
Yes. Just yes. The fact that, I mean, I went
00:54:59.679 --> 00:55:01.940
from blowing rails to drinking coffee. I've done
00:55:01.940 --> 00:55:07.980
pretty well in my regression. So I think I'm
00:55:07.980 --> 00:55:13.059
doing better now. But, yeah, honestly, black
00:55:13.059 --> 00:55:16.380
coffee. Black coffee is, like, it's the one for
00:55:16.380 --> 00:55:19.460
me. Unless, if we do have a show, though, I will.
00:55:19.539 --> 00:55:23.280
I have been known to sip on the... Whatever he's
00:55:23.280 --> 00:55:25.599
got. Do you have a name for it? The Monk. The
00:55:25.599 --> 00:55:31.079
Monk. The Monk Juice. Monk Juice. Maybe we can
00:55:31.079 --> 00:55:33.480
work on that. I don't think I'm going to be drinking
00:55:33.480 --> 00:55:35.639
on that so much. You know, there is one thing
00:55:35.639 --> 00:55:38.019
that I learned that I think I did invent. Uh
00:55:38.019 --> 00:55:42.599
-huh. And I would bring it to when we would travel
00:55:42.599 --> 00:55:44.599
and do shows in Cleveland. Yeah. And I would
00:55:44.599 --> 00:55:46.860
pack up a bunch of little jars, little jelly
00:55:46.860 --> 00:55:53.579
jars, and it was matcha with ginger root in orange
00:55:53.579 --> 00:55:59.920
juice. It is so GD good, man. Really? Yes. Matthias
00:55:59.920 --> 00:56:02.539
would always drink them, these shots. Yeah, it's
00:56:02.539 --> 00:56:04.639
matcha in orange juice with ginger root. It's
00:56:04.639 --> 00:56:07.960
very kind of like Mandarin. That kind of vibe.
00:56:08.039 --> 00:56:12.280
It's really, really good. And I thought it was
00:56:12.280 --> 00:56:14.219
something that other people did, but apparently
00:56:14.219 --> 00:56:17.699
people don't. So that is a TK Monk special. That
00:56:17.699 --> 00:56:20.059
is the Monk Juice. That's the Monk Juice. The
00:56:20.059 --> 00:56:24.179
flow. And before we go, I wanted to ask if you
00:56:24.179 --> 00:56:27.780
want to break down a lyric. You have one. Flame.
00:56:28.860 --> 00:56:36.219
It is one of the favorites on the charts. Didn't
00:56:36.219 --> 00:56:38.659
I, didn't I, didn't I start the fire? What does
00:56:38.659 --> 00:56:42.800
the whole song really kind of, what is it about?
00:56:43.980 --> 00:56:48.820
That one is the song on the album that I didn't
00:56:48.820 --> 00:56:54.059
write the lyrics to. It's Greek mythology. Sometimes
00:56:54.059 --> 00:56:58.159
when we write, We're very fortunate to where
00:56:58.159 --> 00:57:03.260
when we would jam, TK will do a free form. So
00:57:03.260 --> 00:57:06.260
I scat words. Scat words. And so Sully, our drummer,
00:57:06.420 --> 00:57:14.159
took those particular scats and put lyrics to
00:57:14.159 --> 00:57:17.980
it. But I do believe Didn't I, Didn't I, Didn't
00:57:17.980 --> 00:57:20.539
I. Was originally scat. Yeah, I think it was
00:57:20.539 --> 00:57:26.139
like, so. Yeah, I asked Sully about that. It's
00:57:26.139 --> 00:57:30.880
about Greek mythology. There's a specific story
00:57:30.880 --> 00:57:35.559
about it. Some guy finds that his wife was having
00:57:35.559 --> 00:57:38.519
an affair, so he goes after her with a flaming
00:57:38.519 --> 00:57:41.500
sword. I think that that's kind of where it is.
00:57:42.139 --> 00:57:44.019
What did you think about it? No, I think that
00:57:44.019 --> 00:57:45.639
that's more important. The thing is, is like,
00:57:45.719 --> 00:57:48.400
it, it seemed like a, almost like a bit of a
00:57:48.400 --> 00:57:50.699
romance or something like, you know, didn't I
00:57:50.699 --> 00:57:53.880
start the fire? I put the work in and did I,
00:57:53.900 --> 00:57:57.400
you know, did I see it become something or not?
00:57:57.599 --> 00:57:59.480
I think, I believe that's kind of what, what
00:57:59.480 --> 00:58:02.199
it was for him. But if it's what you think, that's,
00:58:02.199 --> 00:58:06.000
what's more important. Um, and I, I, I, I, so
00:58:06.000 --> 00:58:08.079
believe that that's, that's, you know, um, so
00:58:08.079 --> 00:58:12.619
I, I definitely keep. to the original inflection
00:58:12.619 --> 00:58:15.039
even though i didn't write the words to that
00:58:15.039 --> 00:58:17.880
one i do keep to the original inflection and
00:58:17.880 --> 00:58:21.659
um there was a hot it was several years back
00:58:21.659 --> 00:58:25.059
where um i was still writing and performing um
00:58:25.059 --> 00:58:30.320
as a black cat moan and it was blues derivative
00:58:30.320 --> 00:58:36.059
and the blues can get really sad You know what
00:58:36.059 --> 00:58:38.119
I mean? You can get into murder ballads and such.
00:58:38.260 --> 00:58:41.679
You know what I mean? And are you not familiar
00:58:41.679 --> 00:58:43.619
with murder? I don't think I've heard of murder.
00:58:43.679 --> 00:58:47.559
Yeah. Yeah. It's it's it's great. Yeah. You know
00:58:47.559 --> 00:58:52.099
what I mean? It's a bit of history. But but that's
00:58:52.099 --> 00:58:55.119
not me. And I always said, you know, I wanted
00:58:55.119 --> 00:58:57.360
to bring the bliss of the blues. And it's that,
00:58:57.539 --> 00:58:59.960
you know, that which doesn't kill you makes you
00:58:59.960 --> 00:59:02.500
stronger. There is no bad. It's only lessons
00:59:02.500 --> 00:59:05.619
in life. And so, like, I made this vow to always
00:59:05.619 --> 00:59:09.360
have a positive. All of my... I will leave nothing
00:59:09.360 --> 00:59:12.159
behind that is a negative. That's somebody that
00:59:12.159 --> 00:59:14.679
I could learn, oh, my God, they listened to that
00:59:14.679 --> 00:59:16.800
before they killed themselves. Bullshit. Do you
00:59:16.800 --> 00:59:18.940
know what I mean? Like, that is nothing I ever
00:59:18.940 --> 00:59:23.389
want to put out into the world. So... Even taking
00:59:23.389 --> 00:59:28.469
somebody else's lyrics, I will always infuse
00:59:28.469 --> 00:59:32.329
it with a little sexuality, a little smut. Yes,
00:59:32.530 --> 00:59:35.889
there is a relationship in there. Yes, I turned
00:59:35.889 --> 00:59:39.329
it positive. Yes, you know, even lay down with
00:59:39.329 --> 00:59:41.750
your loving. Yeah, lay beside your loving war.
00:59:41.889 --> 00:59:47.289
Didn't I see you go? Right. And so I will always
00:59:47.289 --> 00:59:51.500
even utilize that as. Um, lay down your loving
00:59:51.500 --> 00:59:55.880
war. Well, I've had loving war in bed, you know,
00:59:55.940 --> 00:59:59.000
you know what I mean? Where, where it is that,
00:59:59.019 --> 01:00:01.619
that challenge and, and you challenge each other
01:00:01.619 --> 01:00:04.800
to do something fantastic. And, um, didn't I
01:00:04.800 --> 01:00:07.460
see you go, well, I mean, everybody goes off,
01:00:07.500 --> 01:00:10.579
you know, at some point. So like, I, I really
01:00:10.579 --> 01:00:13.079
do. There's almost a celebration in it. Correct.
01:00:13.300 --> 01:00:15.519
It's, it's, I, I, that's what I always try and
01:00:15.519 --> 01:00:19.360
deliver. um when i sing or when i emote is that
01:00:19.360 --> 01:00:24.480
positive erotic spin of celebration of life yeah
01:00:24.480 --> 01:00:27.840
i mean the esoteric and and like if if you go
01:00:27.840 --> 01:00:30.679
through all the lyrics they're always very esoteric
01:00:30.679 --> 01:00:34.500
they're very non -linear but they're always i
01:00:34.500 --> 01:00:38.039
always make it a point you know that it is um
01:00:38.039 --> 01:00:41.519
you will find the best in this activity in yourself
01:00:41.519 --> 01:00:46.679
yeah it's It's it really it got me through my
01:00:46.679 --> 01:00:50.760
breakup, I guess you could call it. It was it
01:00:50.760 --> 01:00:53.880
was very therapeutic. I very enjoyed it because
01:00:53.880 --> 01:00:57.840
it kind of let me feel, but also like kind of
01:00:57.840 --> 01:01:00.519
celebrate that resilience. Yes. And it really
01:01:00.519 --> 01:01:03.800
is. You know, I think that's a good point to
01:01:03.800 --> 01:01:05.940
leave on that that celebration of resilience,
01:01:06.079 --> 01:01:08.639
not just the relationships, any relationship
01:01:08.639 --> 01:01:11.719
for that matter. There's. There is a resilience
01:01:11.719 --> 01:01:14.099
in being able to see yourself out on the other
01:01:14.099 --> 01:01:19.280
side. I think that's a good, this would, a comedian
01:01:19.280 --> 01:01:22.179
would call this, this is the callback. If you
01:01:22.179 --> 01:01:26.639
recall how this conversation all started, it
01:01:26.639 --> 01:01:32.119
is the resilience to end the relationship with
01:01:32.119 --> 01:01:35.619
yourself that you have to leave behind and move
01:01:35.619 --> 01:01:40.239
forward in order to carry on and continue. And
01:01:40.239 --> 01:01:43.880
that's the life of a healthy mind. And that's
01:01:43.880 --> 01:01:46.639
the blessing and the curse of the artist that
01:01:46.639 --> 01:01:49.800
we all happen to be in this room. But that life,
01:01:49.880 --> 01:01:57.440
live life as art. And be immortal. That's, yeah,
01:01:57.480 --> 01:02:00.719
you can't. Anything else? I don't want to say
01:02:00.719 --> 01:02:03.619
anything after that. Yeah. Mic drop. Yeah, that's
01:02:03.619 --> 01:02:06.110
the mic drop. All right. Thanks, guys. Love you,
01:02:06.130 --> 01:02:07.909
Caleb. This is great. Thank you. Yay, you're
01:02:07.909 --> 01:02:12.510
wonderful. All right. So that happened. Grab
01:02:12.510 --> 01:02:16.409
a great cup of coffee anywhere else. Try the
01:02:16.409 --> 01:02:17.989
mung juice or whatever we're going to call it.
01:02:18.090 --> 01:02:21.429
And stay tuned for the next episode of Caffeinated
01:02:21.429 --> 01:02:25.210
Connections. Take care, guys. You will. That
01:02:25.210 --> 01:02:26.389
was so much fun. That was awesome.
00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.100
Well, welcome back to Caffeinated Connections
00:00:03.100 --> 00:00:07.679
with your host, Caleb McCartney. As you hear
00:00:07.679 --> 00:00:10.800
in the background, we got our guests from the
00:00:10.800 --> 00:00:14.759
wonderful band, the one, the only, Dream the
00:00:14.759 --> 00:00:20.839
Heavy. And, uh... Keycards, please. Oh, you'd
00:00:20.839 --> 00:00:22.399
be surprised. We don't have captions on this.
00:00:22.500 --> 00:00:26.500
Or, uh, what is it? Time cards, right? But yeah,
00:00:26.600 --> 00:00:29.699
got these two wonderful people from Dream the
00:00:29.699 --> 00:00:33.399
Heavy. And it is a pleasure to have them on.
00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:36.039
How are you guys doing? Pleasure to be here.
00:00:36.100 --> 00:00:38.159
Caleb, how did we meet? Do you want to tell them?
00:00:38.420 --> 00:00:41.359
Well, it was quite, you know, no pun intended,
00:00:41.479 --> 00:00:47.740
a shot in the dark. I ended up photographing
00:00:47.740 --> 00:00:50.520
them at Haven. If you guys don't know what Haven
00:00:50.520 --> 00:00:54.079
is, it's a wonderful... venue that you can go
00:00:54.079 --> 00:00:57.219
out listen to some music on a weekend and some
00:00:57.219 --> 00:01:02.140
wonderful bands play played and play for everyone
00:01:02.140 --> 00:01:06.019
and it is what like 10 bucks 15 bucks 10 15 bucks
00:01:06.019 --> 00:01:09.959
the the people at haven are uh friends of ours
00:01:09.959 --> 00:01:13.359
within the music scene as well and to have have
00:01:13.359 --> 00:01:15.920
that represented have have them representing
00:01:15.920 --> 00:01:19.260
the community in and of itself is is pretty special
00:01:19.260 --> 00:01:21.400
it's not something that you normally would get
00:01:22.280 --> 00:01:26.200
anywhere in any large city. And once again, it
00:01:26.200 --> 00:01:29.159
just showcases how important Pittsburgh is and
00:01:29.159 --> 00:01:33.260
how it is able to curate art and music in a way
00:01:33.260 --> 00:01:37.620
that is unique and just to ourselves and just
00:01:37.620 --> 00:01:40.379
to within our community. So to have Haven there,
00:01:40.519 --> 00:01:43.079
to have you represent with your photography,
00:01:43.219 --> 00:01:45.120
and there was a ton of photographers there that
00:01:45.120 --> 00:01:48.239
evening. The bands were wonderful. Quick shout
00:01:48.239 --> 00:01:52.680
out to Eli of Wild Blue Yonder, to Zoltan and
00:01:52.680 --> 00:01:56.099
to Benito. Benito did a great job. So yes, yeah,
00:01:56.180 --> 00:02:00.500
we had probably one of the, easily one of our
00:02:00.500 --> 00:02:03.819
most memorable shows that night. And we were
00:02:03.819 --> 00:02:07.900
very fortunate to have you there with your eye
00:02:07.900 --> 00:02:10.840
to capture a lot of that. So thank you. And yes,
00:02:10.879 --> 00:02:14.639
that's how we met. And I know that. yourself
00:02:14.639 --> 00:02:18.219
and TK have fostered a nice little relationship
00:02:18.219 --> 00:02:20.919
going forward. So I'm honored to be here and
00:02:20.919 --> 00:02:23.180
being able to witness what's going to be going
00:02:23.180 --> 00:02:27.539
on. And the guy that just talked, well, on the
00:02:27.539 --> 00:02:30.400
podcast episode, you'll see a picture of him
00:02:30.400 --> 00:02:33.099
probably pulled from one of my photos of him
00:02:33.099 --> 00:02:35.939
looking like really rad with the beard and all
00:02:35.939 --> 00:02:39.800
that. And then I'll throw TK in as well. Yeah.
00:02:40.409 --> 00:02:44.310
That'd be nice. But yeah, you don't want too
00:02:44.310 --> 00:02:46.629
much showboating. No, not too many people like
00:02:46.629 --> 00:02:53.340
to look at TK. I agree. They like to stare at
00:02:53.340 --> 00:02:57.300
TK. It's not a glance. It's more of a basilic
00:02:57.300 --> 00:03:00.360
kind of like Medusa thing. Oh, yeah. It is not.
00:03:00.699 --> 00:03:03.000
Caught in the headlights. Quite literally, that
00:03:03.000 --> 00:03:06.020
one girl that I got a photo of, she was right
00:03:06.020 --> 00:03:08.780
underneath you, TK. Right underneath you. She
00:03:08.780 --> 00:03:10.280
looked like she was caught in the headlights,
00:03:10.379 --> 00:03:15.539
but she was not moving. That was a very lively
00:03:15.539 --> 00:03:18.180
audience. Good connections that night. Absolutely.
00:03:18.539 --> 00:03:20.860
Like connecting to the crowd. It was a wonderful
00:03:20.860 --> 00:03:23.479
space, man. Which is the most important thing
00:03:23.479 --> 00:03:25.960
too. With Dream the Heavy, that's one of our
00:03:25.960 --> 00:03:29.599
main things is to connect to the crowd. So there's
00:03:29.599 --> 00:03:33.740
no barrier between art and community. We want
00:03:33.740 --> 00:03:37.419
everybody to come in and hug and just kind of
00:03:37.419 --> 00:03:40.560
like, and the love on one another because that's...
00:03:40.840 --> 00:03:42.400
That's where everything feels special. That's
00:03:42.400 --> 00:03:44.800
true. That's what Pittsburgh is, the city of
00:03:44.800 --> 00:03:47.439
brotherly love. That's Philadelphia. Take it.
00:03:47.580 --> 00:03:51.460
We're so close. What is it? We're also the city
00:03:51.460 --> 00:03:54.379
with the most bridges. Even though they say Paris
00:03:54.379 --> 00:03:58.080
is, we have three more than them. Boom. Parisians.
00:04:00.500 --> 00:04:03.219
Pittsburgh does have a lot of love. The artist
00:04:03.219 --> 00:04:05.240
community in Pittsburgh has always been fantastic.
00:04:05.719 --> 00:04:11.099
I've always said that it's a playground. where
00:04:11.099 --> 00:04:13.500
they want you to come in and play. It's not a
00:04:13.500 --> 00:04:17.060
competition. It's, oh, you do this too? Oh, you
00:04:17.060 --> 00:04:20.220
have to meet. Oh, you should show here. Oh, I
00:04:20.220 --> 00:04:23.740
got to turn you on to this. So the more you go
00:04:23.740 --> 00:04:26.600
out into the arts in Pittsburgh, you'll start
00:04:26.600 --> 00:04:29.480
seeing the same people, and you'll start seeing
00:04:29.480 --> 00:04:32.860
this great community that stems back for decades.
00:04:33.079 --> 00:04:35.040
And that's the other thing when I first moved
00:04:35.040 --> 00:04:37.970
here for the arts. I noticed that there was no
00:04:37.970 --> 00:04:42.350
age barrier. It was... And the only thing that
00:04:42.350 --> 00:04:46.649
connected was intellect. You connected to the
00:04:46.649 --> 00:04:49.529
intellect and the interest. And everybody came
00:04:49.529 --> 00:04:51.889
in on an equal playing field. It was wonderful.
00:04:52.069 --> 00:04:54.250
It is wonderful. It is wonderful. Respect. Mm
00:04:54.250 --> 00:04:58.370
-hmm. Lived in San Francisco as well. And when
00:04:58.370 --> 00:05:01.689
we moved out there, I was looking for that same...
00:05:02.560 --> 00:05:05.660
and it was definitely more competition out there.
00:05:05.800 --> 00:05:09.100
Great art, good people, but you had to break
00:05:09.100 --> 00:05:13.399
through to get to the people. It was definitely
00:05:13.399 --> 00:05:16.699
a competition. It was business out there. There's
00:05:16.699 --> 00:05:21.399
a lot of... I'd run there, so I'll speak on it.
00:05:21.459 --> 00:05:24.959
It's a lot of backstabbing, but it's a friendlier
00:05:24.959 --> 00:05:30.180
way. It's competitive, but in order to get...
00:05:30.670 --> 00:05:33.069
And in order to get into the places that really
00:05:33.069 --> 00:05:37.329
matter, you have to push yourselves endlessly.
00:05:37.949 --> 00:05:41.149
Not unlike what you have to do here, but it's
00:05:41.149 --> 00:05:46.290
much more venomous. Here there is an amount of
00:05:46.290 --> 00:05:49.430
care and an amount of admiration for everybody
00:05:49.430 --> 00:05:55.629
who's creative. And it's on a much, much larger
00:05:55.629 --> 00:06:01.709
loving scale. I grew up there. It's where I'm
00:06:01.709 --> 00:06:05.569
from. I love San Francisco. I love the East Bay.
00:06:05.610 --> 00:06:09.230
I love Oakland. But I've never been as well received
00:06:09.230 --> 00:06:13.350
as I have been since moving here. Oh, yeah. As
00:06:13.350 --> 00:06:16.170
a Cali kid, I mean, I completely understand that
00:06:16.170 --> 00:06:18.750
trying to break through. I mean, I was I was
00:06:18.750 --> 00:06:20.730
still an artist, but I was a Play -Doh artist.
00:06:20.810 --> 00:06:23.490
You know, I took it back to the Play -Doh days
00:06:23.490 --> 00:06:26.069
of being eight years old and doing that in Legos,
00:06:26.069 --> 00:06:31.019
probably. So I really wasn't the artist. So there
00:06:31.019 --> 00:06:33.459
was a lot more competition out there. But even
00:06:33.459 --> 00:06:36.699
just looking at L .A., looking at San Jose and
00:06:36.699 --> 00:06:39.100
all these other places, breaking through that
00:06:39.100 --> 00:06:42.220
barrier of entry is so much harder than Pittsburgh.
00:06:43.120 --> 00:06:47.459
It's uninviting. And I think that's what Pittsburgh
00:06:47.459 --> 00:06:50.480
is, is it's willing to receive you for who you
00:06:50.480 --> 00:06:53.910
are. And for what you can create as opposed to
00:06:53.910 --> 00:06:56.029
what you can give me, what you can do for me.
00:06:56.269 --> 00:07:01.350
So it's, and this is coming from me. I am, I
00:07:01.350 --> 00:07:03.389
am born and raised there. That is my home. I
00:07:03.389 --> 00:07:07.089
love the East Bay immensely. I have family. I
00:07:07.089 --> 00:07:10.189
have friends. I have enemies. I have people there
00:07:10.189 --> 00:07:13.850
that I will cherish and love and respect forever.
00:07:14.230 --> 00:07:18.730
And they're still struggling. And most of them
00:07:18.730 --> 00:07:21.750
had to just stop. Because it got to a point to
00:07:21.750 --> 00:07:25.009
where either it wasn't making money. They fell
00:07:25.009 --> 00:07:28.670
out of favor as far as popularity. The venues
00:07:28.670 --> 00:07:35.490
change so often. And it just becomes difficult.
00:07:36.790 --> 00:07:39.970
That being said, I'll always love it. I'll always
00:07:39.970 --> 00:07:44.649
respect it. I feel far more welcomed and appreciated
00:07:44.649 --> 00:07:48.660
within the Pittsburgh community. Because I could
00:07:48.660 --> 00:07:55.959
just be me. There was always like, you know,
00:07:55.959 --> 00:07:58.639
there was always a click involved. And I became
00:07:58.639 --> 00:08:01.600
really susceptible to it. And I immersed myself
00:08:01.600 --> 00:08:04.959
into that. And looking back in a retrospective
00:08:04.959 --> 00:08:08.480
manner, I realized that me trying to be cool,
00:08:08.620 --> 00:08:16.459
I was really not. I was just absolutely swamped.
00:08:16.910 --> 00:08:20.350
and just being, how can I put this? You cared
00:08:20.350 --> 00:08:22.550
more about the audience than yourself? I didn't
00:08:22.550 --> 00:08:25.290
care about the audience. Oh. I didn't care. It
00:08:25.290 --> 00:08:29.050
was great to have it there. The tribe? But it
00:08:29.050 --> 00:08:31.230
wasn't even the tribe. You know what it was?
00:08:31.250 --> 00:08:35.870
It was me trying to prove that I was worthy.
00:08:36.610 --> 00:08:39.809
And I feel like that's San Francisco in a nutshell,
00:08:39.950 --> 00:08:42.289
is just always out there trying to prove yourself.
00:08:42.429 --> 00:08:46.340
And when you do, then everybody kind of, you
00:08:46.340 --> 00:08:49.279
get bought out. Whereas I feel like within Pittsburgh,
00:08:49.460 --> 00:08:52.840
there's more of a, there's more, what's the word
00:08:52.840 --> 00:08:57.399
I'm looking for, TK? Je ne sais. Je ne sais pas.
00:08:57.639 --> 00:08:59.879
A little thing, I don't know what. A little,
00:08:59.899 --> 00:09:02.299
I don't know what. I don't know. The sourdough
00:09:02.299 --> 00:09:07.139
bread is really sour in San Francisco. I don't
00:09:07.139 --> 00:09:09.450
mind being salty in Pittsburgh. The thing that
00:09:09.450 --> 00:09:12.470
I find often is you will get a little bit of
00:09:12.470 --> 00:09:14.590
clickiness in Pittsburgh, but at the end of the
00:09:14.590 --> 00:09:18.230
day, it is very, I mean, the way I look at Pittsburgh
00:09:18.230 --> 00:09:20.950
is it's like the heartthrob that isn't toxic.
00:09:21.870 --> 00:09:26.529
Respect. It's a genuine love for one another.
00:09:26.750 --> 00:09:30.230
And when you find that crew, it's not only come
00:09:30.230 --> 00:09:32.909
on in, it's come on in, have a biscuit, have
00:09:32.909 --> 00:09:35.190
a chicken leg, and we're going to send you home
00:09:35.190 --> 00:09:37.919
with food as well. Yes. Bros used to go for every
00:09:37.919 --> 00:09:41.659
night. That's kind of like how our, that is exactly
00:09:41.659 --> 00:09:44.820
how our experience at Haven was. So to kind of,
00:09:44.820 --> 00:09:47.200
you know, come full circle on that, certainly
00:09:47.200 --> 00:09:51.139
go to that place. And it's really nice to see
00:09:51.139 --> 00:09:54.080
musicians support one another like that and within
00:09:54.080 --> 00:09:57.799
that fashion as well. It's the most counter,
00:09:57.879 --> 00:10:01.539
counter competitive environment where it's not
00:10:01.539 --> 00:10:04.200
competitive at all. And it's like, holy crap,
00:10:04.360 --> 00:10:05.679
you're sitting there in a green room and it's
00:10:05.679 --> 00:10:08.299
like. everyone's just kind of vibing and hanging
00:10:08.299 --> 00:10:09.840
out and having a good time. And it's not like
00:10:09.840 --> 00:10:11.980
quite literally the playground, you know, go
00:10:11.980 --> 00:10:14.460
back to kindergarten. It's, you know, who, who,
00:10:14.460 --> 00:10:17.259
who the fuck cares who you are. Okay. He said
00:10:17.259 --> 00:10:22.200
it or they did it. And so I was, I was, I wanted
00:10:22.200 --> 00:10:23.639
to see who was going to break the hymen first.
00:10:25.879 --> 00:10:31.139
It is. Thank you. It is. Okay. Um, yeah. So,
00:10:31.139 --> 00:10:37.240
um, I, no, no, I'm going to hold back. My children
00:10:37.240 --> 00:10:40.980
may listen to this and I don't need them to learn
00:10:40.980 --> 00:10:44.720
new curse words. But yeah, you nailed it perfectly.
00:10:44.940 --> 00:10:49.799
I mean, no one should really care who you are
00:10:49.799 --> 00:10:52.899
as long as you're not an asshole. And when it
00:10:52.899 --> 00:10:54.559
comes to like, rather you make music, rather
00:10:54.559 --> 00:10:57.080
you make, I mean, art, music. I mean, I was a
00:10:57.080 --> 00:10:59.740
musician in middle school when I had a lead pencil
00:10:59.740 --> 00:11:02.539
band, when I would tap the pen and annoy the
00:11:02.539 --> 00:11:05.539
hell out of my, what is it, Spanish? No, not
00:11:05.539 --> 00:11:08.620
Spanish. We hated her. She was a math topics
00:11:08.620 --> 00:11:13.340
teacher. Honestly, it wasn't geography that I
00:11:13.340 --> 00:11:17.840
hated. I hated geometry. And she was very big.
00:11:17.919 --> 00:11:20.139
She's like the area, the area, the area. I said,
00:11:20.159 --> 00:11:23.299
I really don't give a fuck what area you have.
00:11:23.799 --> 00:11:26.139
And we would annoy the hell out of her by tapping
00:11:26.139 --> 00:11:29.279
our lead pencil and just doing it so fast or
00:11:29.279 --> 00:11:32.460
so loud. So that that little twang, it really
00:11:32.460 --> 00:11:34.759
brought out her rage. And it was the lead pencil
00:11:34.759 --> 00:11:36.559
band. It was the lead pencil band. And it was
00:11:36.559 --> 00:11:39.860
so worth it. And lead pencil rebellion. Is that
00:11:39.860 --> 00:11:42.679
the that was the Ticonderoga players, right?
00:11:43.769 --> 00:11:46.549
I think that's what that was. Oh, the Lead Pencil
00:11:46.549 --> 00:11:49.610
Rebellion. That's the newest band coming to a
00:11:49.610 --> 00:11:54.230
city near you. Let's hope not. Maybe they can
00:11:54.230 --> 00:11:59.850
sell it all. But no, I mean, the art, whether
00:11:59.850 --> 00:12:02.730
you're playing lead pencils or just starting
00:12:02.730 --> 00:12:05.289
out art very early on, whether you're eight years
00:12:05.289 --> 00:12:08.200
old listening to this or you're 62. I think art
00:12:08.200 --> 00:12:11.299
is this way of coping with reality. It's this,
00:12:11.379 --> 00:12:13.980
it's, I mean, literally it is the human condition
00:12:13.980 --> 00:12:17.039
put into something. True. I mean, and that's
00:12:17.039 --> 00:12:19.360
another thing why robots can't do it. That's
00:12:19.360 --> 00:12:24.340
great. It's, it's, you, you get, I, do you feel
00:12:24.340 --> 00:12:26.799
with the whole AI thing coming around that it's
00:12:26.799 --> 00:12:30.159
just a little, even in the, even with their flaws,
00:12:30.379 --> 00:12:33.279
I feel like when, when humans make flaws with
00:12:33.279 --> 00:12:37.759
an art, it still has a organic appeal. And I
00:12:37.759 --> 00:12:39.980
think that's, that's my main thing with AI is
00:12:39.980 --> 00:12:43.740
that it just doesn't have that organic flaw,
00:12:43.860 --> 00:12:47.440
that organic flaw. And I think they could, I'm
00:12:47.440 --> 00:12:50.799
not going to give anybody any ideas, but yeah,
00:12:50.840 --> 00:12:54.200
I think organic flaws are worth it. Whether it's
00:12:54.200 --> 00:12:59.539
in painting, sculpture, music, in any sort of
00:12:59.539 --> 00:13:03.500
art. I think that that is absolutely necessary.
00:13:03.720 --> 00:13:07.799
I believe the pursuit of perfection. is drastically
00:13:07.799 --> 00:13:12.860
overrated. My art, my creative has always been
00:13:12.860 --> 00:13:16.840
primarily music. Growing up, listening to the
00:13:16.840 --> 00:13:21.190
really poorly mixed... half eaten cassette tapes
00:13:21.190 --> 00:13:24.210
by the dead Kennedys or even by public enemy.
00:13:24.309 --> 00:13:28.090
It just, it, it made me appreciate that because
00:13:28.090 --> 00:13:29.889
it also, but because your tape could get eaten
00:13:29.889 --> 00:13:31.870
up at any minute, it was also temporary. You,
00:13:31.909 --> 00:13:34.049
you didn't know how long you had with that sort
00:13:34.049 --> 00:13:35.769
of thing, which I think is an important thing
00:13:35.769 --> 00:13:39.750
of art too, is like, it is temporary within you
00:13:39.750 --> 00:13:42.029
because you will move on. You will, you will
00:13:42.029 --> 00:13:46.129
find another, another avenue for that. Man, I
00:13:46.129 --> 00:13:47.970
could just go on all day about this. It fosters
00:13:47.970 --> 00:13:50.570
growth. It does foster growth. You make a good
00:13:50.570 --> 00:13:53.149
point because that's another thing that I, like,
00:13:53.210 --> 00:13:56.330
at, what, 16, 17 years old, I came to the terms
00:13:56.330 --> 00:13:59.250
that I couldn't listen and hear and read everything
00:13:59.250 --> 00:14:02.129
that I could in my lifetime. And it was like,
00:14:02.250 --> 00:14:05.889
oh, my God, what should I listen to? And you're
00:14:05.889 --> 00:14:10.149
having this midlife crisis. 16? Yeah. Holy shit.
00:14:11.429 --> 00:14:14.519
Well, you've got to realize, too. Being raised
00:14:14.519 --> 00:14:18.639
with the library of Alexandria in your pocket,
00:14:18.799 --> 00:14:23.580
I didn't really wrap my brain around that. You're
00:14:23.580 --> 00:14:26.200
saying you can have this existential crisis of
00:14:26.200 --> 00:14:29.259
I could only hold so much information. I only
00:14:29.259 --> 00:14:32.539
have so much time. I have access to everything.
00:14:33.159 --> 00:14:37.419
How do I spend my time? That's really brilliant.
00:14:37.559 --> 00:14:39.279
It's really brilliant. And I'm impressed that
00:14:39.279 --> 00:14:41.779
you even had this moment. Like the thing is,
00:14:41.840 --> 00:14:45.620
since then has been nothing but intentional pursuit
00:14:45.620 --> 00:14:48.220
of brilliant, not even just an intentional pursuit
00:14:48.220 --> 00:14:51.919
of knowledge, but an intentional curiosity of
00:14:51.919 --> 00:14:54.860
knowledge of new things. So what I actually do
00:14:54.860 --> 00:14:57.659
is I ask a friend for a playlist that's so different
00:14:57.659 --> 00:14:59.759
from mine every year. And I say, give me your
00:14:59.759 --> 00:15:02.100
music. And I listen to that rather. I hate it.
00:15:02.559 --> 00:15:04.340
So much, and I don't understand what they're
00:15:04.340 --> 00:15:07.440
saying, because I learned about techno -neo -pop.
00:15:07.779 --> 00:15:10.720
Okay. And it is, it's an entirely different genre,
00:15:10.799 --> 00:15:13.279
and there's King Lizard and the Seven Wizard.
00:15:13.600 --> 00:15:15.980
King Gizzard and Lizard Wizard. Something like
00:15:15.980 --> 00:15:19.059
that. They are, they are, they're there. They're
00:15:19.059 --> 00:15:21.480
there. Them and Uncle Acid and the Dead Beats
00:15:21.480 --> 00:15:24.700
are kind of like what I'm kind of gravitating
00:15:24.700 --> 00:15:26.860
around. But I digress. Go ahead. But no, when
00:15:26.860 --> 00:15:29.240
it comes to like, you have to, I think that when
00:15:29.240 --> 00:15:31.340
it comes to consuming something in the modern
00:15:31.340 --> 00:15:35.120
age, We have the Library of Alexandria in our
00:15:35.120 --> 00:15:38.799
pocket. And there's two ways of thinking that
00:15:38.799 --> 00:15:43.220
kind of two people, I cannot quote them, but
00:15:43.220 --> 00:15:46.500
there's one thinking that there's too much information,
00:15:46.600 --> 00:15:49.340
so I don't want to interact with any of it. Or
00:15:49.340 --> 00:15:52.500
there's, so there's, I don't know which one is
00:15:52.500 --> 00:15:55.580
right, which one's correct. So I don't know where
00:15:55.580 --> 00:15:58.840
to go. So it's the paralysis by analysis, or
00:15:58.840 --> 00:16:02.720
it's you're so overwhelmed that you don't, you
00:16:02.720 --> 00:16:04.360
don't want to pick one, so you don't pick any.
00:16:04.500 --> 00:16:08.019
And it's a problem because I can't imagine these
00:16:08.019 --> 00:16:11.779
kids that are, you know, I don't think we prepare
00:16:11.779 --> 00:16:19.600
the next generation for what is accessible. I've
00:16:19.600 --> 00:16:22.000
witnessed, having kids of my own, I've witnessed
00:16:22.000 --> 00:16:29.120
my teenage daughter. Go in circles in and around
00:16:29.120 --> 00:16:33.899
music, in and around theater, in and around movies,
00:16:34.080 --> 00:16:37.539
plays. It seems to be, and this could be just
00:16:37.539 --> 00:16:40.600
an influence of what I have over her, and I'm
00:16:40.600 --> 00:16:43.779
not attributing that, but she gravitates to the
00:16:43.779 --> 00:16:48.320
same stuff at her age that I did when I was a
00:16:48.320 --> 00:16:50.460
little older than what she is now. In your jeans.
00:16:50.759 --> 00:16:54.019
I mean, the things she's listening to and the
00:16:54.019 --> 00:16:56.490
things that she's creating. are things that speak
00:16:56.490 --> 00:16:59.090
to her and i find that that is exactly what spoke
00:16:59.090 --> 00:17:02.070
to me and i'm certain that that energy and then
00:17:02.070 --> 00:17:06.890
that that that chaos spoke to my parents so i
00:17:06.890 --> 00:17:09.529
think there's avenues there so yes analysis paralysis
00:17:09.529 --> 00:17:12.029
is like the worst thing you can have as a musician
00:17:12.029 --> 00:17:14.930
or an artist or an artist however i think if
00:17:14.930 --> 00:17:17.650
you can answer what's put in front of you and
00:17:17.650 --> 00:17:20.289
allow the universe to kind of direct you and
00:17:20.289 --> 00:17:22.809
channel you through these things then it becomes
00:17:22.809 --> 00:17:25.480
easier And if you have friends like you have
00:17:25.480 --> 00:17:27.460
and you're willing to experiment and you're willing
00:17:27.460 --> 00:17:33.940
to step outside of the box and not be so boxed
00:17:33.940 --> 00:17:40.000
in with perfection and embrace something that
00:17:40.000 --> 00:17:43.839
makes you uncomfortable, holy shit, are you going
00:17:43.839 --> 00:17:46.339
to grow. Not only grow, but you're going to benefit.
00:17:46.579 --> 00:17:49.200
You're going to benefit from it. And I think
00:17:49.200 --> 00:17:52.470
that's what makes. A lot of musicians, a lot
00:17:52.470 --> 00:17:55.849
of artists. I think that that is that is the
00:17:55.849 --> 00:17:59.089
sun that creates the photosynthesis for us to
00:17:59.089 --> 00:18:04.349
grow. Hear, hear. In all of this overwhelming
00:18:04.349 --> 00:18:11.230
ability to access the all. At the same time,
00:18:11.309 --> 00:18:15.599
you have to you need a counterbalance. And there's
00:18:15.599 --> 00:18:18.059
more Eastern philosophy being integrated into
00:18:18.059 --> 00:18:21.180
our world in the Western society than ever. Thank
00:18:21.180 --> 00:18:26.640
goodness. And so through this, as this onslaught
00:18:26.640 --> 00:18:30.460
comes, if you can be conscious of your breath,
00:18:30.660 --> 00:18:32.960
be conscious of what your heart's doing, be conscious
00:18:32.960 --> 00:18:37.660
of where that, your emotions are your barometer.
00:18:38.039 --> 00:18:40.779
And that's the only way to weed out all the bullshit.
00:18:41.609 --> 00:18:43.529
You know what I mean? You really have to just
00:18:43.529 --> 00:18:48.930
breathe, calm, get that static. Find a way to
00:18:48.930 --> 00:18:50.789
remove the static because there's more static
00:18:50.789 --> 00:18:56.589
than ever. But everybody aligns at their own
00:18:56.589 --> 00:18:58.829
frequency and resonance and their own little
00:18:58.829 --> 00:19:00.930
radio station, if you will. They pick up and
00:19:00.930 --> 00:19:03.569
they align with what comes naturally. So if you
00:19:03.569 --> 00:19:06.089
can get all that static out of the way, you can
00:19:06.089 --> 00:19:10.170
really focus in on your path. By your little
00:19:10.170 --> 00:19:12.470
beacons that are being thrown to you, you know,
00:19:12.509 --> 00:19:15.509
and keep growing and keep growing and be conscious
00:19:15.509 --> 00:19:17.849
of all the things that there is nothing wrong.
00:19:18.029 --> 00:19:20.869
There's no bad. There's, you know, just it's
00:19:20.869 --> 00:19:23.490
just information. So the things that that make
00:19:23.490 --> 00:19:26.630
you upset. Great. Know why they make you upset.
00:19:26.730 --> 00:19:29.730
The things that make you, you know, erotic. Know
00:19:29.730 --> 00:19:32.650
why it makes you erotic. All of these things
00:19:32.650 --> 00:19:34.569
follow your bliss, like Joseph Campbell said.
00:19:34.789 --> 00:19:37.730
But nothing is wrong. Just it's all information.
00:19:38.430 --> 00:19:41.930
Breathe through it and keep moving forward. Like
00:19:41.930 --> 00:19:44.589
you said, got to move past that analysis paralysis.
00:19:45.329 --> 00:19:49.190
When it comes, you mentioned like this idea of
00:19:49.190 --> 00:19:52.769
going past the static. What I found often is
00:19:52.769 --> 00:19:57.369
we sometimes get stuck in these rooms of TV static.
00:19:57.670 --> 00:20:00.849
And we surround ourselves with these rooms of
00:20:00.849 --> 00:20:04.069
TV static because sometimes it's more, chaos
00:20:04.069 --> 00:20:09.619
is easier if we're used to it. And so how I'm
00:20:09.619 --> 00:20:11.539
sure we've all encountered that. How have you
00:20:11.539 --> 00:20:16.619
both kind of gotten away, tried to reconstitute
00:20:16.619 --> 00:20:20.859
this familiarity of static and try to go away
00:20:20.859 --> 00:20:24.880
from it and find healthier avenues? You make
00:20:24.880 --> 00:20:28.440
mistakes. Allow the mistakes. You allow the mistakes.
00:20:28.619 --> 00:20:36.079
You can. As much as you want to. bypass and get
00:20:36.079 --> 00:20:38.400
to the positive you have to stumble you have
00:20:38.400 --> 00:20:41.039
to do that so the static in itself is just as
00:20:41.039 --> 00:20:44.480
important as as the clarity right so this is
00:20:44.480 --> 00:20:46.660
chaos magic we're talking about chaos is fantastic
00:20:46.660 --> 00:20:49.019
there it is yeah it's all the realm of possibilities
00:20:49.019 --> 00:20:54.400
but um it's funny growing up when i uh there
00:20:54.400 --> 00:20:58.019
were literally there was a television on in every
00:20:58.019 --> 00:21:01.420
room and if there wasn't a television on in the
00:21:01.420 --> 00:21:05.099
room there was a radio on And it's really fascinating.
00:21:05.819 --> 00:21:10.440
So much so that when I started living on my own,
00:21:10.500 --> 00:21:12.940
I needed to fall asleep to television because
00:21:12.940 --> 00:21:17.099
it was my comfort. And because that was my sign
00:21:17.099 --> 00:21:19.740
that somebody else was alive in the house was
00:21:19.740 --> 00:21:22.279
if I heard a TV on in the other room. It's really
00:21:22.279 --> 00:21:25.440
fascinating. I psychoanalyze this. I think a
00:21:25.440 --> 00:21:27.579
lot of my generation still deal with that because
00:21:27.579 --> 00:21:31.220
the thing was when I was younger, I had to have
00:21:31.220 --> 00:21:34.369
a TV on and fall asleep to. I need like pitter
00:21:34.369 --> 00:21:36.930
patter of a cat or something because there's
00:21:36.930 --> 00:21:38.750
something weird in our current society where
00:21:38.750 --> 00:21:41.809
silence is scary. It's deafening. It's quite
00:21:41.809 --> 00:21:45.549
literally deafening. And there is something that
00:21:45.549 --> 00:21:49.109
I have learned recently with no longer being
00:21:49.109 --> 00:21:51.670
in a relationship of there is peacefulness in
00:21:51.670 --> 00:21:55.470
silence. And as a photographer, there's the dark
00:21:55.470 --> 00:21:58.829
room where you quite literally are in the dark.
00:21:59.029 --> 00:22:04.819
And there's a story here that. So when I started
00:22:04.819 --> 00:22:07.519
The Dark Room, I was so confident. I was prideful.
00:22:07.680 --> 00:22:10.880
I thought I was hot shit. And I go into The Dark
00:22:10.880 --> 00:22:13.119
Room. I'm the first one in. I have the film in
00:22:13.119 --> 00:22:14.559
my camera. And I'm like, I'm going to do this
00:22:14.559 --> 00:22:16.539
first try. This is going to be easy. Ten minutes.
00:22:16.660 --> 00:22:21.220
Flat. It wasn't ten minutes. Four hours later.
00:22:23.220 --> 00:22:26.720
It wasn't ten minutes. It was about an hour.
00:22:27.119 --> 00:22:30.240
I was in The Dark Room. And this was right after
00:22:30.240 --> 00:22:34.480
a breakup. Holy shit. I was in that dark room.
00:22:34.519 --> 00:22:37.759
It felt like a century. And not only that, but
00:22:37.759 --> 00:22:40.480
you can't give up. You're in the dark. You open
00:22:40.480 --> 00:22:43.240
that door. That is a failure. That is a true
00:22:43.240 --> 00:22:46.799
failure. So being able to work through your failure
00:22:46.799 --> 00:22:50.799
in the literal dark and trying not to beat yourself
00:22:50.799 --> 00:22:53.720
up as an artist. This is an art. You know, you
00:22:53.720 --> 00:22:55.859
took these photos. You cared so much. You cared
00:22:55.859 --> 00:22:57.900
so deeply about this. And, you know, you're like,
00:22:57.980 --> 00:22:59.880
I'm a hot shit. I can do this. And you're in
00:22:59.880 --> 00:23:03.319
there alone. with your camera and you can't see
00:23:03.319 --> 00:23:06.920
anything and you can only feel so one of one
00:23:06.920 --> 00:23:09.119
to two of your senses are turned off the silence
00:23:09.119 --> 00:23:11.819
is quite literally deafening and i remember sitting
00:23:11.819 --> 00:23:15.359
there with the film in my hand and i'm not i
00:23:15.359 --> 00:23:17.480
don't know what i'm i do know what i'm doing
00:23:17.480 --> 00:23:19.559
but i didn't know what i was doing to where i
00:23:19.559 --> 00:23:24.299
had to calm myself and realize oh well i just
00:23:24.299 --> 00:23:27.220
do this and looking at things from a logical
00:23:27.220 --> 00:23:30.140
standpoint as to an emotional standpoint is where
00:23:30.140 --> 00:23:34.299
it starts. Because I can tell you, being in a
00:23:34.299 --> 00:23:37.900
room, a dark room, alone, for that long, maybe
00:23:37.900 --> 00:23:41.059
it wasn't an hour, but it felt like days. And
00:23:41.059 --> 00:23:45.660
you start to realize, holy shit, this is not
00:23:45.660 --> 00:23:49.039
that big of a deal. But I think often our minds
00:23:49.039 --> 00:23:52.079
will go to a point where it's panic. It's panic.
00:23:52.160 --> 00:23:56.119
We will panic because we are afraid of that uncomfortableness.
00:23:57.539 --> 00:23:59.500
daunting fear that we're alone and that we have
00:23:59.500 --> 00:24:01.099
to figure it out all on ourselves. And we do,
00:24:01.140 --> 00:24:03.519
we do have to do it all on ourselves. And that's
00:24:03.519 --> 00:24:05.160
the fun of adulting. That's what I've found out.
00:24:05.380 --> 00:24:08.259
Yeah. Fear is the unknown, you know, and if you,
00:24:08.279 --> 00:24:11.680
if the more, the more, uh, tools you have to
00:24:11.680 --> 00:24:13.779
get through that, like you said, you know, that,
00:24:13.880 --> 00:24:16.200
that you can just rely on for the moment. Who
00:24:16.200 --> 00:24:19.079
was it that said, um, with the treasure you seek
00:24:19.079 --> 00:24:24.099
most is in lies in the cave that you fear most.
00:24:25.039 --> 00:24:28.019
You know, it's like you have to go in literally
00:24:28.019 --> 00:24:30.259
to that silence. You have to remove yourself
00:24:30.259 --> 00:24:33.460
from everything you know so that you can get
00:24:33.460 --> 00:24:38.119
to what you were born knowing and get back to
00:24:38.119 --> 00:24:40.740
yourself. And that's what every religion talks
00:24:40.740 --> 00:24:43.000
about, that rebirth into self, you know, rebirth
00:24:43.000 --> 00:24:45.799
and rebirth and rebirth. You know, dying and
00:24:45.799 --> 00:24:48.019
living, dying while living, dying while living.
00:24:48.240 --> 00:24:51.319
You know, it's what we kind of do, especially
00:24:51.319 --> 00:24:54.619
as artists. Oh, my gosh. Every what? And I think
00:24:54.619 --> 00:24:56.700
that that's actually like, like, I think that's
00:24:56.700 --> 00:25:02.960
why artists stay. But, well, it's an impulsive
00:25:02.960 --> 00:25:05.839
bliss. And, you know, because you're constantly
00:25:05.839 --> 00:25:09.440
killing yourself and dying and rebirthing. You're
00:25:09.440 --> 00:25:10.960
trying new things. You're trying new things.
00:25:11.000 --> 00:25:12.980
You're trying new things. You're always young
00:25:12.980 --> 00:25:15.559
at heart because nothing is ever good enough
00:25:15.559 --> 00:25:20.400
because it's good enough. Now it's not because
00:25:20.400 --> 00:25:23.400
you've conquered it. And now, the next dragon
00:25:23.400 --> 00:25:26.619
to slay, and the next shedding of the skin. It's
00:25:26.619 --> 00:25:29.579
a life of fascination. And curiosity as well,
00:25:29.660 --> 00:25:31.579
because I think... It's how to stay young. I
00:25:31.579 --> 00:25:33.000
mean, not only that, but... Be fascinated with
00:25:33.000 --> 00:25:35.480
life. I think that's the thing that a lot of
00:25:35.480 --> 00:25:37.500
people talk about, where it's like, oh, you know,
00:25:37.519 --> 00:25:40.599
if the kid dies in you, the younger kid that
00:25:40.599 --> 00:25:45.099
you are at heart, if that dies, then, you know,
00:25:45.099 --> 00:25:48.759
kiss the rest of your life goodbye. As I usually
00:25:48.759 --> 00:25:51.440
say, because it's like... You have to have this
00:25:51.440 --> 00:25:56.299
childish sense of curiosity and wonder. And we
00:25:56.299 --> 00:25:59.079
have to make sure that we balance that with the
00:25:59.079 --> 00:26:02.380
naivety of that child, where sometimes we go
00:26:02.380 --> 00:26:05.500
in and we think one thing and we have to humble
00:26:05.500 --> 00:26:08.240
ourselves. And sometimes it bites us in the ass,
00:26:08.240 --> 00:26:14.039
quite literally. Yep. It's good. It's good. It's
00:26:14.039 --> 00:26:16.980
good. This is the strangest life I've ever known
00:26:16.980 --> 00:26:20.079
and I wouldn't trade it for. Wouldn't trade it
00:26:20.079 --> 00:26:22.720
for the world. And you mentioned, you know, staying
00:26:22.720 --> 00:26:26.000
young. I think a lot of people, like everyone
00:26:26.000 --> 00:26:28.640
I've talked to, they're like, I'm like, guess
00:26:28.640 --> 00:26:30.779
how old he is? And everyone's just like, 30,
00:26:30.900 --> 00:26:34.259
20. You're not, are you? No, you could add those
00:26:34.259 --> 00:26:40.839
together. Yeah. I didn't even mean it. Yeah.
00:26:41.779 --> 00:26:43.920
I've been inhabiting this body for over half
00:26:43.920 --> 00:26:47.309
a century. That's... I don't understand. And
00:26:47.309 --> 00:26:49.569
I look to inhabit it for another... Another 50.
00:26:49.750 --> 00:26:54.509
And then a couple more bodies. Yeah. I don't
00:26:54.509 --> 00:26:57.089
know. I mean, I do know how you do it as an artist.
00:26:57.190 --> 00:26:59.869
I mean... We just explained it. Yeah. It really...
00:26:59.869 --> 00:27:02.869
It's... You know, being an artist isn't something
00:27:02.869 --> 00:27:05.250
that you just want to be when you grow up. You
00:27:05.250 --> 00:27:07.670
just are. I really... I just think you just...
00:27:07.670 --> 00:27:10.509
You... It's a blessing and a curse. Quite literally.
00:27:10.569 --> 00:27:14.470
The body will die before the artist does. Quite
00:27:14.470 --> 00:27:16.690
literally, you know, we have to retire from what
00:27:16.690 --> 00:27:19.849
you love. No, no. You know, there's there's there's
00:27:19.849 --> 00:27:25.289
people who lose an ability. They lose, lose something,
00:27:26.210 --> 00:27:29.029
lose an ability to create. They just go on. They
00:27:29.029 --> 00:27:32.069
find another medium to it. And that's that's
00:27:32.069 --> 00:27:35.170
what a creative person will do. If you lose your
00:27:35.170 --> 00:27:38.589
eyes, maybe you go back into music. If I lose
00:27:38.589 --> 00:27:41.559
my hands. Perhaps I go into photography or I
00:27:41.559 --> 00:27:43.839
do something. We will always find something.
00:27:43.920 --> 00:27:46.799
And the fortunate thing is with technology and
00:27:46.799 --> 00:27:48.619
everything that has advanced, we can always find
00:27:48.619 --> 00:27:54.480
an outlet for that. So yeah, the creative side
00:27:54.480 --> 00:27:59.400
that is directly linked to the hopeful youth
00:27:59.400 --> 00:28:03.539
energy within you is something that will pass
00:28:03.539 --> 00:28:07.359
on and pass along long after the flesh is gone.
00:28:08.140 --> 00:28:10.920
Is that Johnny Cash lyric? It's ministry after
00:28:10.920 --> 00:28:13.359
the flesh. Is that after the flesh? After the
00:28:13.359 --> 00:28:20.140
flesh. But you're absolutely right, Caleb. That's
00:28:20.140 --> 00:28:23.319
something that just doesn't diminish. The desire
00:28:23.319 --> 00:28:30.720
to be heard, the desire to be seen as a creative
00:28:30.720 --> 00:28:33.539
person, regardless of your medium and regardless
00:28:33.539 --> 00:28:37.730
of your whatever. That doesn't go away. And I
00:28:37.730 --> 00:28:42.069
think that's why a lot of people who inhabit
00:28:42.069 --> 00:28:46.710
that light and that energy leave a little early.
00:28:46.869 --> 00:28:51.549
Because sometimes it's overwhelming. And to compensate
00:28:51.549 --> 00:28:57.230
for success, to compensate for anxieties, we
00:28:57.230 --> 00:29:00.769
turn to things that are detrimental to the human
00:29:00.769 --> 00:29:05.849
form. So with the longevity thing. And speaking
00:29:05.849 --> 00:29:09.069
on, you know, TK and myself, we're certainly
00:29:09.069 --> 00:29:13.710
in that half century thing. And people are, especially
00:29:13.710 --> 00:29:19.150
with TK, are mesmerized and astonished when they
00:29:19.150 --> 00:29:22.309
find out how long he's been around. They said
00:29:22.309 --> 00:29:26.849
that it's unfair. They could do it too. That's
00:29:26.849 --> 00:29:28.950
what I was going to get at. It's like, you know,
00:29:28.970 --> 00:29:36.369
be a... That's how to lead is just show possibilities.
00:29:36.710 --> 00:29:39.170
Like every artist that I've always been mesmerized
00:29:39.170 --> 00:29:41.470
with, every musician, every sculptor, anyone
00:29:41.470 --> 00:29:44.430
who considered themselves an artist, dance, poetry,
00:29:44.609 --> 00:29:47.569
they show you that it's possible because it didn't
00:29:47.569 --> 00:29:51.730
exist until they were the conduit for it. And
00:29:51.730 --> 00:29:54.869
it already existed, to be honest with you. That's
00:29:54.869 --> 00:29:57.210
why I say like inhabiting this form. Everything
00:29:57.210 --> 00:30:01.250
exists. It just needs plucked from. The ether.
00:30:01.390 --> 00:30:03.630
A little self -actualization. Self -actualization.
00:30:03.829 --> 00:30:06.150
And I think people who... That too. But every
00:30:06.150 --> 00:30:08.490
artist, we're all conduits to it. Yeah. And we're
00:30:08.490 --> 00:30:10.849
all like radio stations to it. It's what do you
00:30:10.849 --> 00:30:14.569
bring and what do you share as proof to pudding,
00:30:14.690 --> 00:30:17.349
baby? I think a lot of it has to be attributed
00:30:17.349 --> 00:30:22.990
to how happy you are with what you're able to
00:30:22.990 --> 00:30:26.329
do as well. Because if you're not, if you're
00:30:26.329 --> 00:30:29.500
always pursuing... The next thing the next thing
00:30:29.500 --> 00:30:31.359
next thing and you're not completely happy with
00:30:31.359 --> 00:30:34.279
what you've done before and allow that to kind
00:30:34.279 --> 00:30:37.380
of be what it is with with all its mistakes then
00:30:37.380 --> 00:30:41.940
you become a cannibal and you start to to literally
00:30:41.940 --> 00:30:45.339
eat yourself away the art the art part of you
00:30:45.339 --> 00:30:47.559
starts to eat itself away and that starts to
00:30:47.559 --> 00:30:49.599
go and then you become a thief because then you're
00:30:49.599 --> 00:30:51.640
trying to just replicate and steal from what
00:30:51.640 --> 00:30:58.980
you were in your experiences prior. Those, those,
00:30:59.039 --> 00:31:00.559
you have to be able to leave those footprints
00:31:00.559 --> 00:31:03.640
behind in order to continue and you will find
00:31:03.640 --> 00:31:08.220
new, new and more adventurous things. Um, so
00:31:08.220 --> 00:31:10.839
in order, in order to progress and in order to
00:31:10.839 --> 00:31:13.099
stay and to have a good longevity at doing these
00:31:13.099 --> 00:31:15.599
things, you do have to say, you have to be willing
00:31:15.599 --> 00:31:18.140
to say goodbye to a few things as well. And I
00:31:18.140 --> 00:31:20.519
think saying goodbye to that allows you to grow.
00:31:20.640 --> 00:31:23.759
It allows your body to replenish, allows your
00:31:23.759 --> 00:31:28.180
spirit to go. Uh, and. it keeps you loose because
00:31:28.180 --> 00:31:31.140
once you start to get too rigid, then it kind
00:31:31.140 --> 00:31:33.819
of, then that's when you start to atrophy your
00:31:33.819 --> 00:31:37.119
creative spark starts to dwindle. That's, that's
00:31:37.119 --> 00:31:40.660
where you lose yourself. That's a good point.
00:31:40.839 --> 00:31:43.279
And you make a very good point. And I was going
00:31:43.279 --> 00:31:47.299
to get into it. Perfect transition from when
00:31:47.299 --> 00:31:51.180
it comes to being an artist, we're going to not,
00:31:51.240 --> 00:31:53.279
we're going to get into a creative rut that,
00:31:53.319 --> 00:31:56.180
that shit happens. Yeah. And. You make a very
00:31:56.180 --> 00:31:57.859
good point. That is literally what you're describing,
00:31:57.980 --> 00:31:59.960
this idea of you're making, you're making, you're
00:31:59.960 --> 00:32:01.440
in a good flow, and then all of a sudden you
00:32:01.440 --> 00:32:03.359
hit not only a curb, but you're just kind of
00:32:03.359 --> 00:32:06.019
stuck. And then you start to lose a part of yourself.
00:32:06.359 --> 00:32:12.480
Yes. How do you guys work through a creative
00:32:12.480 --> 00:32:13.960
rut? Because, I mean, I'd love to talk on that
00:32:13.960 --> 00:32:15.980
too, but I'd love to hear your guys' point. Do
00:32:15.980 --> 00:32:19.180
you have something? I have one thing. You mentioned
00:32:19.180 --> 00:32:23.160
it before. You find comfort in the silence. When
00:32:23.160 --> 00:32:25.420
you find comfort in the silence. then you hear
00:32:25.420 --> 00:32:29.980
what's being said to you. Yes. So once you start
00:32:29.980 --> 00:32:36.019
realizing that the creative process is like breathing
00:32:36.019 --> 00:32:42.039
and you need to, and there's a pause and you
00:32:42.039 --> 00:32:46.099
bring it in and then you gestate and then you
00:32:46.099 --> 00:32:48.460
release. There's always those moments afterwards.
00:32:48.740 --> 00:32:53.599
It's the seasons. You need that downtime. Or
00:32:53.599 --> 00:32:56.640
you burn too quickly. You burn out. You have
00:32:56.640 --> 00:32:59.779
to have that replenishment. So when those so
00:32:59.779 --> 00:33:03.180
-called creative ruts or writer's block, if you
00:33:03.180 --> 00:33:07.680
allow yourself to rest, all of those, you know,
00:33:07.700 --> 00:33:09.900
everything that you planted and put out there,
00:33:09.980 --> 00:33:11.799
those seeds are in the air. They're going to
00:33:11.799 --> 00:33:14.619
come and land again if you just stop blowing
00:33:14.619 --> 00:33:18.380
hot air and just let it settle. Just let it settle.
00:33:18.460 --> 00:33:21.619
They'll hit the soil again. and they're going
00:33:21.619 --> 00:33:23.819
to spring a new shit you couldn't even imagine
00:33:23.819 --> 00:33:28.720
because at some point you do have to listen.
00:33:29.140 --> 00:33:31.759
You have to open your eyes to what's around you
00:33:31.759 --> 00:33:34.619
again because it's so easy to get wrapped up
00:33:34.619 --> 00:33:37.579
into what your creative spirit, what you're birthing,
00:33:37.599 --> 00:33:40.740
what you're birthing. It's so fun. Oh, it's intoxicating.
00:33:41.359 --> 00:33:45.299
Believe it or not, I'm not that. I have a very.
00:33:45.920 --> 00:33:48.079
If I didn't have to leave the studio, I wouldn't.
00:33:48.079 --> 00:33:50.460
I like I have a very happy home life. My studio
00:33:50.460 --> 00:33:53.359
is in my house. My family's in my house. It's
00:33:53.359 --> 00:33:56.099
great. The band comes now to the studio. Like
00:33:56.099 --> 00:33:58.200
if I didn't have to leave the mothership, I wouldn't
00:33:58.200 --> 00:34:03.400
accept it to share. Yeah. But so I could I'm
00:34:03.400 --> 00:34:08.280
I do fall praying to not leaving my studio. But
00:34:08.280 --> 00:34:10.840
there's those moments you have to allow yourself
00:34:10.840 --> 00:34:13.599
to rest. You have to allow yourself to sleep
00:34:13.599 --> 00:34:16.480
when you need to sleep so that you can wake up
00:34:16.480 --> 00:34:20.360
and birth again. These Indras, you know, is this
00:34:20.360 --> 00:34:23.719
sleep and birth, sleep and birth. Oh, that's
00:34:23.719 --> 00:34:26.579
a huge thing to sleep. I just learned that myself
00:34:26.579 --> 00:34:29.780
after, you know, the last two weeks, three weeks,
00:34:29.800 --> 00:34:34.260
like I graduate in two weeks and it's exciting
00:34:34.260 --> 00:34:37.420
and scary. Not only that, but I had my thesis
00:34:37.420 --> 00:34:42.179
last week. Which I was privy to be at, and the
00:34:42.179 --> 00:34:45.260
work looked fantastic. Thank you. Oh, man, as
00:34:45.260 --> 00:34:47.199
soon as you came up the steps, your work was
00:34:47.199 --> 00:34:50.440
right there, and it set everything up. It was
00:34:50.440 --> 00:34:55.239
beautiful. Andy would have been proud. It's just
00:34:55.239 --> 00:34:59.840
gorgeous work. And so it tapped into our time
00:34:59.840 --> 00:35:02.989
as well. And your write up was great. So congratulations
00:35:02.989 --> 00:35:06.590
on a beautiful thesis. You achieved it. Thank
00:35:06.590 --> 00:35:10.849
you. I truly appreciate it. It's you know, I've
00:35:10.849 --> 00:35:12.989
talked about it briefly, but on the podcast.
00:35:13.010 --> 00:35:16.869
But really, you know, that has been nothing but
00:35:16.869 --> 00:35:18.530
anxiety because it's you know, you're making
00:35:18.530 --> 00:35:22.449
a work not because you want to share it, not
00:35:22.449 --> 00:35:24.110
only because you want to share it with others,
00:35:24.210 --> 00:35:26.510
but you're afraid of its reception and you're
00:35:26.510 --> 00:35:29.679
afraid of, you know, what. Because at the end
00:35:29.679 --> 00:35:32.599
of the day, art and culture, art influences culture,
00:35:32.719 --> 00:35:35.719
culture influences art. So the thing is, as we
00:35:35.719 --> 00:35:39.420
jump into it, the work itself is very poignant.
00:35:39.500 --> 00:35:45.219
It's very. Cumulative of the time, and it's scary
00:35:45.219 --> 00:35:48.679
because not only do I think it's good because
00:35:48.679 --> 00:35:52.019
I'm very prideful of it, but I had sleepless
00:35:52.019 --> 00:35:54.980
nights because of it, because there is this,
00:35:55.000 --> 00:35:57.630
you know, this. you know, prove yourself kind
00:35:57.630 --> 00:35:59.429
of mentality, even when you're a college student.
00:35:59.670 --> 00:36:02.150
Well, you got to, to your professor, especially,
00:36:02.349 --> 00:36:04.449
there's numbers that are going to come after
00:36:04.449 --> 00:36:05.829
it. You know what I mean? You're going to be
00:36:05.829 --> 00:36:09.530
graded on it. So you have to, you have a, you
00:36:09.530 --> 00:36:12.949
have one judge. Yeah. That lives outside of yourself
00:36:12.949 --> 00:36:17.150
now. That you have to win over. You have to win
00:36:17.150 --> 00:36:18.630
yourself first and then you have to win over
00:36:18.630 --> 00:36:22.469
this one judge. I still have school anxieties.
00:36:22.610 --> 00:36:24.789
I went to art school and I have school anxiety.
00:36:24.909 --> 00:36:28.369
Far more fearful than am I going to be accepted?
00:36:28.789 --> 00:36:32.349
Because did you feel like you had to, with the
00:36:32.349 --> 00:36:34.130
anxiety and everything that built around that
00:36:34.130 --> 00:36:38.090
and producing your thesis and having a specific
00:36:38.090 --> 00:36:41.070
person to kind of impress and to judge you upon
00:36:41.070 --> 00:36:43.929
that, when you've created art in other instances.
00:36:44.409 --> 00:36:48.670
Did you feel like your thesis was far more stressful?
00:36:49.610 --> 00:36:51.750
And do you think that, and second part, do you
00:36:51.750 --> 00:36:55.230
think that that stress propelled you to push
00:36:55.230 --> 00:36:58.769
yourself into a more creative position? Initially,
00:36:58.769 --> 00:37:02.989
it wasn't. The thesis started out me trying to
00:37:02.989 --> 00:37:05.449
prove a point, and it was an entirely different
00:37:05.449 --> 00:37:07.730
point. But what I realized, it was less about
00:37:07.730 --> 00:37:10.829
proving a point to others and more about me.
00:37:11.710 --> 00:37:14.409
Congratulations. And beautiful. And it's the
00:37:14.409 --> 00:37:19.389
process during it was staring at staring me in
00:37:19.389 --> 00:37:22.670
the face because I was, you know, I woke up,
00:37:22.710 --> 00:37:26.690
wanted to be at an event at a rally. And I was
00:37:26.690 --> 00:37:29.130
like, during politics. And I said, what the fuck?
00:37:29.130 --> 00:37:31.630
Why not? Why not? And I kept doing it, doing
00:37:31.630 --> 00:37:34.789
it, doing it. I missed multiple classes. And
00:37:34.789 --> 00:37:37.590
it was like it was so weird. Hey, can I can I
00:37:37.590 --> 00:37:40.570
get class off? I'm going to Obama's rally and
00:37:40.570 --> 00:37:42.489
I'm going to be taking photos of him. I know
00:37:42.489 --> 00:37:46.230
it sounds like an excuse, but like I am. Yeah.
00:37:46.329 --> 00:37:49.550
And I just did all this. And I it really at a
00:37:49.550 --> 00:37:53.809
certain point I got to a reflection where I sit
00:37:53.809 --> 00:37:57.150
in the car and I'm like driving miles and hours
00:37:57.150 --> 00:38:01.119
just to. Cross my fingers and hope and hope that
00:38:01.119 --> 00:38:03.820
I get and hope that I do this. And it wasn't
00:38:03.820 --> 00:38:07.260
to prove myself. It wasn't there was no anxiety
00:38:07.260 --> 00:38:09.579
there. It was what the fuck? This is this is
00:38:09.579 --> 00:38:13.139
fucking crazy. I can do it. And eventually I
00:38:13.139 --> 00:38:15.480
started to kind of come to terms with myself
00:38:15.480 --> 00:38:17.940
of like, I don't have to prove shit to anyone.
00:38:18.519 --> 00:38:21.739
And none of us do. None of us have to prove shit
00:38:21.739 --> 00:38:24.440
to anyone aside from ourself of who the hell
00:38:24.440 --> 00:38:28.340
are you and what are you waiting for? Worthy.
00:38:28.670 --> 00:38:31.369
That was something that Paul mentioned earlier
00:38:31.369 --> 00:38:36.389
of the anxiety in the arts community in the Bay
00:38:36.389 --> 00:38:40.250
Area that he felt, am I worthy? And that's something
00:38:40.250 --> 00:38:43.469
that I've been trying to come to grips with in
00:38:43.469 --> 00:38:46.250
my adult life. And I've solved them through the
00:38:46.250 --> 00:38:48.570
silence and through affirmations in the silence
00:38:48.570 --> 00:38:51.289
for it to have self -esteem. Because I learned
00:38:51.289 --> 00:38:53.829
later in life that I had crippling anxiety over
00:38:53.829 --> 00:39:01.679
my own self -esteem. Learning that is what propels
00:39:01.679 --> 00:39:06.239
art in an honest fashion. The realization of
00:39:06.239 --> 00:39:11.079
because you can conceive it, it's worthy. Because
00:39:11.079 --> 00:39:14.300
it hits you, your barometer this way, your emotional
00:39:14.300 --> 00:39:18.280
barometer this way, your bliss factor, that's
00:39:18.280 --> 00:39:20.239
what makes it worthy. And what's fascinating
00:39:20.239 --> 00:39:24.840
is you start realizing that you are the only
00:39:24.840 --> 00:39:30.800
one ever. to experience it this way. And if you're
00:39:30.800 --> 00:39:36.360
strong enough to share your only ever moment
00:39:36.360 --> 00:39:40.320
with others, good on you. That's worthy. That
00:39:40.320 --> 00:39:43.619
is life worthy. That's what we all strive for.
00:39:43.780 --> 00:39:46.440
Some people do it through children. Yeah. We're
00:39:46.440 --> 00:39:48.880
artists. We birth children on a daily basis.
00:39:48.940 --> 00:39:52.599
So good on you. And they're worthy. To tag onto
00:39:52.599 --> 00:39:57.789
that, I feel, playing in Dream the Heavy, That
00:39:57.789 --> 00:39:59.909
is what I think the collective consciousness
00:39:59.909 --> 00:40:03.230
of all five of us is. Let's, let's give what
00:40:03.230 --> 00:40:06.590
we have in our unique way in order to share it.
00:40:06.630 --> 00:40:10.130
So everybody else can experience their unique
00:40:10.130 --> 00:40:12.570
way of experiencing us. So that way it just becomes
00:40:12.570 --> 00:40:15.369
this just wonderful thing. It just becomes quite
00:40:15.369 --> 00:40:19.550
a cycle. Yeah. And that's that. I think that's
00:40:19.550 --> 00:40:24.170
the biggest mission of what we are as a band
00:40:24.170 --> 00:40:27.760
is to make it not to make sure. but to give our
00:40:27.760 --> 00:40:32.920
best effort in order to bring everybody in, to
00:40:32.920 --> 00:40:39.260
not exclude anybody. There are so, so many wonderful
00:40:39.260 --> 00:40:47.760
humans of every religion, gender, everybody.
00:40:48.280 --> 00:40:51.739
We want everybody. But I just kind of want the
00:40:51.739 --> 00:40:55.090
cool people myself, though, too. I just, I kind
00:40:55.090 --> 00:40:56.789
of want the other people. No assholes allowed.
00:40:57.110 --> 00:41:01.449
I'm kind of over it. I'm really over it. I want
00:41:01.449 --> 00:41:07.750
people there who can put things in perspective
00:41:07.750 --> 00:41:13.849
and realize that this is our moment. This is
00:41:13.849 --> 00:41:19.949
what we do. We want you to be with us. That's
00:41:19.949 --> 00:41:22.869
kind of the dream, the heavy. mission spearheaded
00:41:22.869 --> 00:41:28.130
by by tk but also uh our our you know our our
00:41:28.130 --> 00:41:31.150
keyboard player myself our drummer our guitar
00:41:31.150 --> 00:41:33.710
player and even the person who's filling in for
00:41:33.710 --> 00:41:37.210
our guitarist right now it really is a collective
00:41:37.210 --> 00:41:41.090
to where we just want to hug we don't want to
00:41:41.090 --> 00:41:43.929
we don't want to alienate we just want people
00:41:43.929 --> 00:41:48.150
to put aside their bullshit and open their mind
00:41:48.150 --> 00:41:53.250
to an avenue where they're not... How can I say
00:41:53.250 --> 00:42:00.289
this? Put away the horse shit. Put away your
00:42:00.289 --> 00:42:05.590
fucking ego. There it is. Fucking... Allow. Be.
00:42:06.570 --> 00:42:10.269
Let's just... Be human. Let's just all have that
00:42:10.269 --> 00:42:13.250
energy. Let's all have that... Vulnerability?
00:42:14.130 --> 00:42:17.210
Isn't that such a beautiful word? Yep. It is
00:42:17.210 --> 00:42:20.630
that vulnerability of, I think there's a huge
00:42:20.630 --> 00:42:23.429
thing, not even just I think, I know there is
00:42:23.429 --> 00:42:26.730
this fear of vulnerability in our current society,
00:42:26.969 --> 00:42:30.269
especially the Western world. Oh, yeah. That's
00:42:30.269 --> 00:42:35.849
changing. I think it's changing. Right now, it's
00:42:35.849 --> 00:42:38.909
so in your face. I really hope this is the death
00:42:38.909 --> 00:42:41.010
rattle of it. That I think it's the death rattle
00:42:41.010 --> 00:42:44.309
of it. I really do. It is like the death rattle
00:42:44.309 --> 00:42:48.909
of... of restrictions of misogyny of just restrictions
00:42:48.909 --> 00:42:54.349
um of of uh duality yeah i think i think the
00:42:54.349 --> 00:42:57.710
realization that duality is and doesn't exist
00:42:57.710 --> 00:43:01.610
um this is the death rattle You make a very I
00:43:01.610 --> 00:43:04.170
love this quote. I'm going to coin it myself.
00:43:04.710 --> 00:43:07.550
Binary bullshit. Binary bullshit. And it's this
00:43:07.550 --> 00:43:10.190
idea that things are never going to be yes or
00:43:10.190 --> 00:43:12.449
no. It's there's there's it's a spectrum of things.
00:43:12.550 --> 00:43:16.210
And it should be if everybody is allowed. OK,
00:43:16.309 --> 00:43:20.170
if everybody stays, this is what they were born
00:43:20.170 --> 00:43:25.070
as. These are all perfect shaped cogs to an amazing
00:43:25.070 --> 00:43:28.480
machine. That nature is built. If everybody just
00:43:28.480 --> 00:43:31.420
stays exactly who they're born as, wow, they
00:43:31.420 --> 00:43:34.940
all fit together and solve all the problems by
00:43:34.940 --> 00:43:37.739
being exactly who they are. But that's perfectionism.
00:43:37.760 --> 00:43:42.679
That's allowing somebody to be born and stay
00:43:42.679 --> 00:43:46.579
as their unique self. Learn from each other.
00:43:46.659 --> 00:43:51.920
Work together. But please share your self, the
00:43:51.920 --> 00:43:56.300
self, into the all. Anyway, instead of tribalism
00:43:56.300 --> 00:44:01.380
and not enough or, you know, snowflake and all
00:44:01.380 --> 00:44:07.639
this bullshit, that's duality. And that's really
00:44:07.639 --> 00:44:10.900
restricting the human spirit, you know, that
00:44:10.900 --> 00:44:15.380
is only here for a hot minute. You know, we aren't
00:44:15.380 --> 00:44:20.380
these bodies. We are our consciousness. This
00:44:20.380 --> 00:44:24.429
is just a moment for our consciousness. You typically
00:44:24.429 --> 00:44:27.170
get 73 revolutions. Why are you wasting that
00:44:27.170 --> 00:44:30.610
time? Yeah, like worrying about somebody else.
00:44:30.710 --> 00:44:34.730
Why are you wasting your time? Why are you wasting
00:44:34.730 --> 00:44:39.750
your time on being boxed in and being so rigid
00:44:39.750 --> 00:44:44.650
and so just stoic? Like, this is the way. Be
00:44:44.650 --> 00:44:50.389
the Tao. Yeah. In a river, you have water and
00:44:50.389 --> 00:44:54.210
you have rocks. One of my best friends, Kamal,
00:44:54.309 --> 00:44:56.449
put this to me. In the river, you have water
00:44:56.449 --> 00:45:00.690
and you have rock. I choose to flow. Yes, yes.
00:45:00.849 --> 00:45:03.389
I choose to keep moving. I choose to not stay
00:45:03.389 --> 00:45:06.130
and collect sediment and collect moss. I choose
00:45:06.130 --> 00:45:08.849
to continue to go and to prosper and to find
00:45:08.849 --> 00:45:12.630
other avenues and other channels. That is my
00:45:12.630 --> 00:45:15.449
thought process and has been since Kamal has
00:45:15.449 --> 00:45:20.449
brought it up to me. So meeting TK, TK reassures
00:45:20.449 --> 00:45:26.909
me. That I'm doing well by being water. My wife
00:45:26.909 --> 00:45:29.050
reassures me that I'm doing well by being water.
00:45:29.090 --> 00:45:31.889
I get to see my children. My children reassure
00:45:31.889 --> 00:45:35.190
me. Meeting people like yourself reassures me
00:45:35.190 --> 00:45:38.369
that it's perfect to be the water. You know,
00:45:38.389 --> 00:45:42.030
the rock just kind of sits there. And it's cool,
00:45:42.150 --> 00:45:46.130
and it's heavy, and it's grounding. But the spirit
00:45:46.130 --> 00:45:48.989
isn't supposed to be that. It's affected by everything
00:45:48.989 --> 00:45:51.340
else. It's affected by... Thank you. Thank you.
00:45:51.840 --> 00:45:54.940
And to tag on to what we were saying, we want
00:45:54.940 --> 00:46:01.659
everybody to be involved with us. And that's
00:46:01.659 --> 00:46:04.500
the driving factor of being able to create with
00:46:04.500 --> 00:46:07.719
these five people is we all have different avenues.
00:46:07.900 --> 00:46:10.619
We all have different experiences. We all have
00:46:10.619 --> 00:46:12.420
different genres. We all have different mindsets.
00:46:12.860 --> 00:46:16.659
But to have everybody come in and have a collective
00:46:16.659 --> 00:46:20.869
that comes together to work towards this. is
00:46:20.869 --> 00:46:24.269
is nothing short of remarkable and to be able
00:46:24.269 --> 00:46:29.010
to get on podcasts and to be able to talk to
00:46:29.010 --> 00:46:32.590
people in the audience and and and become more
00:46:32.590 --> 00:46:36.250
than just the relationship of an artist or a
00:46:36.250 --> 00:46:40.610
musician and an audience member we want we want
00:46:40.610 --> 00:46:44.769
family we don't we we when i say hey come to
00:46:44.769 --> 00:46:47.730
a next show and say hi god damn it come fucking
00:46:47.730 --> 00:46:51.239
say hi Come say hi. We're not people that are
00:46:51.239 --> 00:46:53.719
going to be like, we're not going to scoot you
00:46:53.719 --> 00:46:55.460
away. We want to know how you've been. We want
00:46:55.460 --> 00:46:59.500
to know what's creating you. We are very genuinely
00:46:59.500 --> 00:47:02.840
interested. And to some people, it's hard to
00:47:02.840 --> 00:47:06.559
because there's that anxiety and that fear that
00:47:06.559 --> 00:47:08.659
we're not going to accept you. We're going to
00:47:08.659 --> 00:47:15.519
fucking accept you. It's a beautiful situation
00:47:15.519 --> 00:47:21.280
that we're in. As far as a creative collective.
00:47:21.960 --> 00:47:24.519
So the more people we can bring into this. And
00:47:24.519 --> 00:47:27.940
the more it can become yours too. It's not unto
00:47:27.940 --> 00:47:32.659
ourselves. The whole cliche of like. Once you
00:47:32.659 --> 00:47:35.920
release a song. It no longer belongs to you.
00:47:35.940 --> 00:47:37.880
It belongs to the world. That is absolutely true
00:47:37.880 --> 00:47:40.860
with every piece of art. Because everybody's
00:47:40.860 --> 00:47:42.400
going to interpret it their own way. Everybody's
00:47:42.400 --> 00:47:44.199
going to move in their own way. So to kind of
00:47:44.199 --> 00:47:48.170
bring it all back. Come say hi. Come, come be
00:47:48.170 --> 00:47:51.710
with us. You, you are, you are welcome. You are
00:47:51.710 --> 00:47:56.849
worthy of, of love. You are worthy of everything
00:47:56.849 --> 00:48:02.030
that you possibly want. So I, I, I feel fortunate
00:48:02.030 --> 00:48:07.090
enough to have somebody who reminds me on a weekly
00:48:07.090 --> 00:48:10.969
or daily basis that that is, that's what it is.
00:48:11.070 --> 00:48:14.920
So I, I, you know, thank you to TK. My wife does
00:48:14.920 --> 00:48:17.300
it as well. So I'm very fortunate to have that.
00:48:17.340 --> 00:48:21.179
And I hope that folks listening have somebody
00:48:21.179 --> 00:48:25.880
there in order to kind of reassure. But also,
00:48:25.980 --> 00:48:32.300
if you don't, say hi to us. We want to see other
00:48:32.300 --> 00:48:34.780
people's art. And I think if you talk to the
00:48:34.780 --> 00:48:37.280
majority of other people we've played with or
00:48:37.280 --> 00:48:40.219
performed with, they'll say the same thing. You
00:48:40.219 --> 00:48:46.309
know, it's something we put out there. Yeah,
00:48:46.469 --> 00:48:48.750
I don't know. Come to Pittsburgh. Come to Pittsburgh.
00:48:48.929 --> 00:48:50.570
Yeah, come to Pittsburgh. Come to Pittsburgh.
00:48:50.690 --> 00:48:53.190
We'll have the next summer of love. It was San
00:48:53.190 --> 00:48:56.949
Francisco, and now it's Pittsburgh. Here we are.
00:48:57.489 --> 00:49:01.210
One last question for you both. What is your
00:49:01.210 --> 00:49:04.849
guys' preferred caffeinated beverage, as I guess
00:49:04.849 --> 00:49:07.929
the scientists call it? Or what is it, your preferred
00:49:07.929 --> 00:49:11.949
way of caffeinating yourself or getting up? Yes.
00:49:13.449 --> 00:49:17.530
I love caffeine. Coffee in the morning. I don't
00:49:17.530 --> 00:49:21.090
mind any drink if I need it. I like matcha. I
00:49:21.090 --> 00:49:25.630
like give a mate. I like caffeine. I like the
00:49:25.630 --> 00:49:29.610
stimulant. Was it something that you always got
00:49:29.610 --> 00:49:32.030
into or was it just, well, everyone else is doing
00:49:32.030 --> 00:49:39.150
it? Yes. I learned coffee in college. I learned
00:49:39.150 --> 00:49:41.929
coffee actually in Pittsburgh more than Baltimore.
00:49:42.730 --> 00:49:44.630
Now that I think about it, I was, I was drinking
00:49:44.630 --> 00:49:47.710
coffee as a, as a child. I was, as my grandmother,
00:49:47.829 --> 00:49:49.849
as my grandmother was sitting around the table,
00:49:49.849 --> 00:49:52.289
smoking cigarettes, I was just sipping coffee.
00:49:52.429 --> 00:49:55.150
And I, I grew fond of black coffee. Oh, really
00:49:55.150 --> 00:49:58.210
quick. Oh, I love the stuff. It's, it's horrendous,
00:49:58.210 --> 00:50:01.230
but it is, it, it works. And then as, as time
00:50:01.230 --> 00:50:03.250
went on, I found other things that were a little
00:50:03.250 --> 00:50:07.309
bit stronger than coffee. Um, but I, that's,
00:50:07.309 --> 00:50:09.309
that's always been my, my kind of go -to. I do
00:50:09.309 --> 00:50:14.179
love a, uh, I love a. freshly brewed espresso
00:50:14.179 --> 00:50:17.460
as well. Not like the Starbucks bullshit, right?
00:50:18.179 --> 00:50:25.420
Starbucks coffee and Subway sandwiches have the
00:50:25.420 --> 00:50:28.679
same kind of vibe where everything tastes the
00:50:28.679 --> 00:50:31.480
same and it all tastes like the packaging. So
00:50:31.480 --> 00:50:35.179
the Starbucks cups has a particular smell and
00:50:35.179 --> 00:50:36.920
the coffee tastes like that. They'll never sponsor
00:50:36.920 --> 00:50:40.159
me. I don't want Starbucks. I don't want them
00:50:40.159 --> 00:50:45.219
either. No, no. I don't think Subway does sponsor
00:50:45.219 --> 00:50:48.219
me either. There was a thing where this guy was
00:50:48.219 --> 00:50:55.719
sponsored by Subway. You know that word. I like
00:50:55.719 --> 00:50:58.380
caffeine. I enjoy caffeine. There's times where
00:50:58.380 --> 00:51:03.679
I... am very liberal with it um but yeah i coffee
00:51:03.679 --> 00:51:07.679
coffee any specific brand like local uh you know
00:51:07.679 --> 00:51:11.840
what i was i i loved black forge when it was
00:51:11.840 --> 00:51:15.460
here black forge coffee was was incredible grim
00:51:15.460 --> 00:51:21.699
wizard's good um i did like zeke's uh but i'm
00:51:21.699 --> 00:51:25.820
not too versed on what is local right now The
00:51:25.820 --> 00:51:29.500
one coffee, there's a cat fight coffee. My wife
00:51:29.500 --> 00:51:33.559
has a subscription to it, and it's delicious.
00:51:33.719 --> 00:51:38.659
I also do enjoy Pete's Alameda Roast, which I
00:51:38.659 --> 00:51:43.400
found was the town that I, between Alameda and
00:51:43.400 --> 00:51:46.480
Oka, were entitled to. I grew up in, and so Pete's
00:51:46.480 --> 00:51:49.519
Coffee made a specific Alameda blend. It reminds
00:51:49.519 --> 00:51:52.900
me of that. It takes me back to that. TK makes
00:51:52.900 --> 00:51:56.059
a great cup of coffee. Hi, there's something
00:51:56.059 --> 00:51:59.760
that TK does where he throws in, let me try to
00:51:59.760 --> 00:52:03.400
remember, cinnamon. I'll do a crunch press. Cinnamon,
00:52:03.579 --> 00:52:07.539
cayenne, turmeric, a little bit of ginger. And
00:52:07.539 --> 00:52:10.579
then you sometimes will put like a, is it almond
00:52:10.579 --> 00:52:15.619
milk or oat milk? A coconut milk or, oh no, a
00:52:15.619 --> 00:52:19.019
chocolate almond. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And
00:52:19.019 --> 00:52:23.280
a coriander. Coriander. TK's partner also does
00:52:23.280 --> 00:52:26.400
it. Yeah. Well, yeah, there's health benefits
00:52:26.400 --> 00:52:28.739
to turmeric and to ginger root and to cinnamon.
00:52:29.179 --> 00:52:32.460
It's like, really, if I'm going to do it. Something
00:52:32.460 --> 00:52:34.960
I started putting in my smoothies lately, too,
00:52:35.059 --> 00:52:38.400
is kind of getting into that. Good. Yeah. Yeah,
00:52:38.400 --> 00:52:42.480
yeah, yeah. 100%. Do you get, where do you get
00:52:42.480 --> 00:52:44.960
your grounds? Your grounds? To be honest, no.
00:52:47.179 --> 00:52:48.659
To answer the question, I've been doing a lot
00:52:48.659 --> 00:52:51.119
of matcha lately, and literally I get what I
00:52:51.119 --> 00:52:56.380
can. And I drink matcha throughout the day in
00:52:56.380 --> 00:53:00.099
coconut milk and some monk fruit just to sweeten
00:53:00.099 --> 00:53:05.260
it, and ginger root. But espresso, no, I get
00:53:05.260 --> 00:53:08.500
those. It's nothing local, unfortunately, but
00:53:08.500 --> 00:53:11.619
it's that awesome classic yellow brick, that
00:53:11.619 --> 00:53:13.820
Italian yellow brick that you see in the grocery
00:53:13.820 --> 00:53:18.010
store. The Favostello? Yeah. That is glorious
00:53:18.010 --> 00:53:21.889
tea. So that's what I make. Yeah. Yes. It is
00:53:21.889 --> 00:53:24.750
good. It worked perfectly. Right. So that's what
00:53:24.750 --> 00:53:27.969
I use. But then, so then I add a big spoonful
00:53:27.969 --> 00:53:33.050
of natural cacao. The bitter stuff, right? It's
00:53:33.050 --> 00:53:35.730
real bitter. Espresso. But then I add the cacao
00:53:35.730 --> 00:53:40.590
and I doctor it. So you don't have the - You
00:53:40.590 --> 00:53:45.230
want to taste? Yeah, sure. So that is cinnamon
00:53:45.230 --> 00:53:49.769
cacao. That brick and a little... That's not
00:53:49.769 --> 00:53:52.530
sweet. I don't think the sweet heads at Starbucks
00:53:52.530 --> 00:53:55.190
like that, they would not. But it's pretty good.
00:53:55.250 --> 00:53:57.429
That's sweet to me. Does Miss Mundock procure
00:53:57.429 --> 00:54:00.969
these for you as well? No, I do this. You do
00:54:00.969 --> 00:54:04.829
this. I do this and I share that. She doesn't
00:54:04.829 --> 00:54:08.409
do the espresso the same way. I overdo mine.
00:54:08.690 --> 00:54:11.789
Hers I keep simple with the cacao and the chocolate.
00:54:12.670 --> 00:54:14.650
you know, do a little mocha. She's been getting
00:54:14.650 --> 00:54:17.269
into the espresso more. She doesn't do the matcha.
00:54:17.429 --> 00:54:19.789
She doesn't really like that. But as far as the
00:54:19.789 --> 00:54:21.829
French press that I'd make at home, I make it
00:54:21.829 --> 00:54:24.730
for the house. Do you combine the espresso with
00:54:24.730 --> 00:54:29.510
the matcha? I have, just out of... Dirty matcha?
00:54:30.210 --> 00:54:34.849
Necessity. I have. Yeah. Yeah, like a matcha
00:54:34.849 --> 00:54:37.210
cat. Yeah, I have. Dirty matcha. I'll do that
00:54:37.210 --> 00:54:39.289
with yerba mate as well. I don't even know what
00:54:39.289 --> 00:54:41.079
these things that you're saying. Yerba mate is
00:54:41.079 --> 00:54:44.659
like that. It's more like quadriceps are involved
00:54:44.659 --> 00:54:48.639
with it, I think, a little bit too. We're hyper
00:54:48.639 --> 00:54:50.780
-scientific over here, aren't we? You brought
00:54:50.780 --> 00:54:56.000
up caffeine. Remember that his answer was yes.
00:54:56.039 --> 00:54:59.679
Yes. Just yes. The fact that, I mean, I went
00:54:59.679 --> 00:55:01.940
from blowing rails to drinking coffee. I've done
00:55:01.940 --> 00:55:07.980
pretty well in my regression. So I think I'm
00:55:07.980 --> 00:55:13.059
doing better now. But, yeah, honestly, black
00:55:13.059 --> 00:55:16.380
coffee. Black coffee is, like, it's the one for
00:55:16.380 --> 00:55:19.460
me. Unless, if we do have a show, though, I will.
00:55:19.539 --> 00:55:23.280
I have been known to sip on the... Whatever he's
00:55:23.280 --> 00:55:25.599
got. Do you have a name for it? The Monk. The
00:55:25.599 --> 00:55:31.079
Monk. The Monk Juice. Monk Juice. Maybe we can
00:55:31.079 --> 00:55:33.480
work on that. I don't think I'm going to be drinking
00:55:33.480 --> 00:55:35.639
on that so much. You know, there is one thing
00:55:35.639 --> 00:55:38.019
that I learned that I think I did invent. Uh
00:55:38.019 --> 00:55:42.599
-huh. And I would bring it to when we would travel
00:55:42.599 --> 00:55:44.599
and do shows in Cleveland. Yeah. And I would
00:55:44.599 --> 00:55:46.860
pack up a bunch of little jars, little jelly
00:55:46.860 --> 00:55:53.579
jars, and it was matcha with ginger root in orange
00:55:53.579 --> 00:55:59.920
juice. It is so GD good, man. Really? Yes. Matthias
00:55:59.920 --> 00:56:02.539
would always drink them, these shots. Yeah, it's
00:56:02.539 --> 00:56:04.639
matcha in orange juice with ginger root. It's
00:56:04.639 --> 00:56:07.960
very kind of like Mandarin. That kind of vibe.
00:56:08.039 --> 00:56:12.280
It's really, really good. And I thought it was
00:56:12.280 --> 00:56:14.219
something that other people did, but apparently
00:56:14.219 --> 00:56:17.699
people don't. So that is a TK Monk special. That
00:56:17.699 --> 00:56:20.059
is the Monk Juice. That's the Monk Juice. The
00:56:20.059 --> 00:56:24.179
flow. And before we go, I wanted to ask if you
00:56:24.179 --> 00:56:27.780
want to break down a lyric. You have one. Flame.
00:56:28.860 --> 00:56:36.219
It is one of the favorites on the charts. Didn't
00:56:36.219 --> 00:56:38.659
I, didn't I, didn't I start the fire? What does
00:56:38.659 --> 00:56:42.800
the whole song really kind of, what is it about?
00:56:43.980 --> 00:56:48.820
That one is the song on the album that I didn't
00:56:48.820 --> 00:56:54.059
write the lyrics to. It's Greek mythology. Sometimes
00:56:54.059 --> 00:56:58.159
when we write, We're very fortunate to where
00:56:58.159 --> 00:57:03.260
when we would jam, TK will do a free form. So
00:57:03.260 --> 00:57:06.260
I scat words. Scat words. And so Sully, our drummer,
00:57:06.420 --> 00:57:14.159
took those particular scats and put lyrics to
00:57:14.159 --> 00:57:17.980
it. But I do believe Didn't I, Didn't I, Didn't
00:57:17.980 --> 00:57:20.539
I. Was originally scat. Yeah, I think it was
00:57:20.539 --> 00:57:26.139
like, so. Yeah, I asked Sully about that. It's
00:57:26.139 --> 00:57:30.880
about Greek mythology. There's a specific story
00:57:30.880 --> 00:57:35.559
about it. Some guy finds that his wife was having
00:57:35.559 --> 00:57:38.519
an affair, so he goes after her with a flaming
00:57:38.519 --> 00:57:41.500
sword. I think that that's kind of where it is.
00:57:42.139 --> 00:57:44.019
What did you think about it? No, I think that
00:57:44.019 --> 00:57:45.639
that's more important. The thing is, is like,
00:57:45.719 --> 00:57:48.400
it, it seemed like a, almost like a bit of a
00:57:48.400 --> 00:57:50.699
romance or something like, you know, didn't I
00:57:50.699 --> 00:57:53.880
start the fire? I put the work in and did I,
00:57:53.900 --> 00:57:57.400
you know, did I see it become something or not?
00:57:57.599 --> 00:57:59.480
I think, I believe that's kind of what, what
00:57:59.480 --> 00:58:02.199
it was for him. But if it's what you think, that's,
00:58:02.199 --> 00:58:06.000
what's more important. Um, and I, I, I, I, so
00:58:06.000 --> 00:58:08.079
believe that that's, that's, you know, um, so
00:58:08.079 --> 00:58:12.619
I, I definitely keep. to the original inflection
00:58:12.619 --> 00:58:15.039
even though i didn't write the words to that
00:58:15.039 --> 00:58:17.880
one i do keep to the original inflection and
00:58:17.880 --> 00:58:21.659
um there was a hot it was several years back
00:58:21.659 --> 00:58:25.059
where um i was still writing and performing um
00:58:25.059 --> 00:58:30.320
as a black cat moan and it was blues derivative
00:58:30.320 --> 00:58:36.059
and the blues can get really sad You know what
00:58:36.059 --> 00:58:38.119
I mean? You can get into murder ballads and such.
00:58:38.260 --> 00:58:41.679
You know what I mean? And are you not familiar
00:58:41.679 --> 00:58:43.619
with murder? I don't think I've heard of murder.
00:58:43.679 --> 00:58:47.559
Yeah. Yeah. It's it's it's great. Yeah. You know
00:58:47.559 --> 00:58:52.099
what I mean? It's a bit of history. But but that's
00:58:52.099 --> 00:58:55.119
not me. And I always said, you know, I wanted
00:58:55.119 --> 00:58:57.360
to bring the bliss of the blues. And it's that,
00:58:57.539 --> 00:58:59.960
you know, that which doesn't kill you makes you
00:58:59.960 --> 00:59:02.500
stronger. There is no bad. It's only lessons
00:59:02.500 --> 00:59:05.619
in life. And so, like, I made this vow to always
00:59:05.619 --> 00:59:09.360
have a positive. All of my... I will leave nothing
00:59:09.360 --> 00:59:12.159
behind that is a negative. That's somebody that
00:59:12.159 --> 00:59:14.679
I could learn, oh, my God, they listened to that
00:59:14.679 --> 00:59:16.800
before they killed themselves. Bullshit. Do you
00:59:16.800 --> 00:59:18.940
know what I mean? Like, that is nothing I ever
00:59:18.940 --> 00:59:23.389
want to put out into the world. So... Even taking
00:59:23.389 --> 00:59:28.469
somebody else's lyrics, I will always infuse
00:59:28.469 --> 00:59:32.329
it with a little sexuality, a little smut. Yes,
00:59:32.530 --> 00:59:35.889
there is a relationship in there. Yes, I turned
00:59:35.889 --> 00:59:39.329
it positive. Yes, you know, even lay down with
00:59:39.329 --> 00:59:41.750
your loving. Yeah, lay beside your loving war.
00:59:41.889 --> 00:59:47.289
Didn't I see you go? Right. And so I will always
00:59:47.289 --> 00:59:51.500
even utilize that as. Um, lay down your loving
00:59:51.500 --> 00:59:55.880
war. Well, I've had loving war in bed, you know,
00:59:55.940 --> 00:59:59.000
you know what I mean? Where, where it is that,
00:59:59.019 --> 01:00:01.619
that challenge and, and you challenge each other
01:00:01.619 --> 01:00:04.800
to do something fantastic. And, um, didn't I
01:00:04.800 --> 01:00:07.460
see you go, well, I mean, everybody goes off,
01:00:07.500 --> 01:00:10.579
you know, at some point. So like, I, I really
01:00:10.579 --> 01:00:13.079
do. There's almost a celebration in it. Correct.
01:00:13.300 --> 01:00:15.519
It's, it's, I, I, that's what I always try and
01:00:15.519 --> 01:00:19.360
deliver. um when i sing or when i emote is that
01:00:19.360 --> 01:00:24.480
positive erotic spin of celebration of life yeah
01:00:24.480 --> 01:00:27.840
i mean the esoteric and and like if if you go
01:00:27.840 --> 01:00:30.679
through all the lyrics they're always very esoteric
01:00:30.679 --> 01:00:34.500
they're very non -linear but they're always i
01:00:34.500 --> 01:00:38.039
always make it a point you know that it is um
01:00:38.039 --> 01:00:41.519
you will find the best in this activity in yourself
01:00:41.519 --> 01:00:46.679
yeah it's It's it really it got me through my
01:00:46.679 --> 01:00:50.760
breakup, I guess you could call it. It was it
01:00:50.760 --> 01:00:53.880
was very therapeutic. I very enjoyed it because
01:00:53.880 --> 01:00:57.840
it kind of let me feel, but also like kind of
01:00:57.840 --> 01:01:00.519
celebrate that resilience. Yes. And it really
01:01:00.519 --> 01:01:03.800
is. You know, I think that's a good point to
01:01:03.800 --> 01:01:05.940
leave on that that celebration of resilience,
01:01:06.079 --> 01:01:08.639
not just the relationships, any relationship
01:01:08.639 --> 01:01:11.719
for that matter. There's. There is a resilience
01:01:11.719 --> 01:01:14.099
in being able to see yourself out on the other
01:01:14.099 --> 01:01:19.280
side. I think that's a good, this would, a comedian
01:01:19.280 --> 01:01:22.179
would call this, this is the callback. If you
01:01:22.179 --> 01:01:26.639
recall how this conversation all started, it
01:01:26.639 --> 01:01:32.119
is the resilience to end the relationship with
01:01:32.119 --> 01:01:35.619
yourself that you have to leave behind and move
01:01:35.619 --> 01:01:40.239
forward in order to carry on and continue. And
01:01:40.239 --> 01:01:43.880
that's the life of a healthy mind. And that's
01:01:43.880 --> 01:01:46.639
the blessing and the curse of the artist that
01:01:46.639 --> 01:01:49.800
we all happen to be in this room. But that life,
01:01:49.880 --> 01:01:57.440
live life as art. And be immortal. That's, yeah,
01:01:57.480 --> 01:02:00.719
you can't. Anything else? I don't want to say
01:02:00.719 --> 01:02:03.619
anything after that. Yeah. Mic drop. Yeah, that's
01:02:03.619 --> 01:02:06.110
the mic drop. All right. Thanks, guys. Love you,
01:02:06.130 --> 01:02:07.909
Caleb. This is great. Thank you. Yay, you're
01:02:07.909 --> 01:02:12.510
wonderful. All right. So that happened. Grab
01:02:12.510 --> 01:02:16.409
a great cup of coffee anywhere else. Try the
01:02:16.409 --> 01:02:17.989
mung juice or whatever we're going to call it.
01:02:18.090 --> 01:02:21.429
And stay tuned for the next episode of Caffeinated
01:02:21.429 --> 01:02:25.210
Connections. Take care, guys. You will. That
01:02:25.210 --> 01:02:26.389
was so much fun. That was awesome.