สำเนาบทสนทนา 🔗
WEBVTT
00:00:00.160 --> 00:00:02.799
Welcome to Unstoppable with Paula Swain.
00:00:02.959 --> 00:00:09.599
Real conversations with women about the stories that shaped them, the moments that changed them, and what happened next.
00:00:09.839 --> 00:00:13.119
Because every woman has a story worth telling.
00:00:13.359 --> 00:00:15.199
This is Unstoppable.
00:00:15.599 --> 00:00:17.600
Hi, and welcome to Unstoppable.
00:00:17.679 --> 00:00:19.120
I'm your host, Paula Swain.
00:00:19.199 --> 00:00:28.559
So our guest today um said that for three years, a series of events um tried to kill her.
00:00:28.960 --> 00:00:32.560
So I'm really interested in hearing what she's what that all means.
00:00:32.880 --> 00:00:37.679
Trying to not that she tried to kill herself, but that these events tried to kill her.
00:00:37.920 --> 00:00:40.719
So welcome, Mindy Jackson.
00:00:41.920 --> 00:00:44.799
Okay, we're gonna start right in on it.
00:00:45.200 --> 00:00:46.399
What the heck happened?
00:00:47.920 --> 00:00:49.600
Oh gosh, a lot.
00:00:50.320 --> 00:00:50.960
A lot.
00:00:52.079 --> 00:00:56.560
So I went through heart surgery and had a postoperative stroke.
00:00:56.799 --> 00:01:31.519
I had central vision loss from that, had a near-death experience in the hospital, found out that I could rehabilitate my vision through doing visual arts, did so, painted 20 to the 22 major arcana of the tarot, and lived out every meaning of every card in real time as I painted it, down to next one, breakup that did send me into some, I will say some suicidal thoughts, of course, no actions or plans, but I did go to the edge of the abyss, and it's almost like I had to in order to remember who I really am.
00:01:31.840 --> 00:01:37.519
Uh and then I had um, let's see, gosh, what was next?
00:01:38.719 --> 00:01:39.200
Isn't that enough?
00:01:40.719 --> 00:01:41.439
Isn't that enough?
00:01:42.719 --> 00:01:44.400
There's a lot, there's more.
00:01:44.799 --> 00:01:45.439
Wow.
00:01:46.640 --> 00:01:52.480
Yeah, so I had a bone infection in my foot that got pretty bad for a while there.
00:01:52.640 --> 00:01:56.719
We thought uh surgery might have to happen, and luckily it didn't.
00:01:57.120 --> 00:02:11.280
And then I had uh needed hip surgery, hip replacement surgery at a young age because of uh generational and ancestral trauma I was carrying that my mother carried, that grandmother carried, so on and so forth.
00:02:11.439 --> 00:02:18.960
Oh yeah, and uh excuse me, and uh my suture ruptured open.
00:02:20.240 --> 00:02:21.759
I had to deal with that.
00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:30.560
Um, but before I could even have the hip surgery, I had to put it off because my mom became terminal and she passed away in March.
00:02:30.800 --> 00:02:36.400
So then I had the uh, and that's that's a whole surviving that too.
00:02:36.719 --> 00:02:40.479
Um had the hip surgery in June.
00:02:40.960 --> 00:02:46.000
And um gosh, there's so many things.
00:02:46.560 --> 00:02:55.840
Um, let's just stop there because you've said something there um that I really wanted to dive a little bit deeper into.
00:02:56.240 --> 00:03:09.199
And the first one was the painting and your vision, and then how when you were doing the tarot cards, um, when you were painting them, how you lived out with the card.
00:03:09.280 --> 00:03:11.759
So explain exactly what that means.
00:03:12.319 --> 00:03:13.360
Yes, yes.
00:03:13.599 --> 00:03:25.919
Well, for anybody that knows anything about tarot, you know, each card has its own meaning, and the major arcana are sort of like archetypes.
00:03:26.080 --> 00:03:47.039
Um, they hold uh the energy or the frequency of various different types of archetypes, and they tell the hero's journey from the separation of uh the old self or community or family or whatever, all the way to excuse me, the victory at the end.
00:03:47.199 --> 00:03:52.800
Um, coming back from this journey, uh, a very different person with new tools.
00:03:53.120 --> 00:03:58.319
Um okay, you're gonna have to like take one card and give me an example.
00:03:58.719 --> 00:04:17.680
Okay, so I was literally in the kitchen painting two different paintings, painting the tower card and the devil card, the tower card is about a necessary falling away or a sudden experience that really shifts.
00:04:17.839 --> 00:04:22.319
It's like an implosion that breaks the shell apart, so to speak.
00:04:22.560 --> 00:04:28.240
And of course, the devil card is about uh feeling in bondage, feeling trapped.
00:04:28.319 --> 00:04:38.879
It can be about being in an abusive relationship, it could be about um addictions, anything that you feel uh really attached to in some kind of way.
00:04:39.199 --> 00:04:48.160
So I'm in the middle of painting these two cards, and the ex walks in, sat down, and wanted to have the breakup conversation right then and there.
00:04:49.519 --> 00:04:54.560
So that really set me on a healing journey that I didn't expect.
00:04:55.120 --> 00:04:57.759
Um, it did take me to the abyss.
00:04:58.399 --> 00:05:27.120
And what I realized in the abyss is that this relationship had shown me where my own attachment issues were with my mother and where in my healing process I had to face those parts of myself that I had made small in order to keep the peace, to or perceptually keep the peace.
00:05:27.839 --> 00:05:47.600
So I had to really face my own shadow stuff and bring it to the surface because this relationship really brought things to the surface that made me see where I had attached inadvertently out of fear of loss, out of fear of um causing a wave, so to speak.
00:05:48.000 --> 00:05:53.120
Um, and it taught me how to have a backbolt that I didn't have before.
00:05:55.279 --> 00:06:14.240
Okay, so this is this what you're talking about is that from the moment your husband walked into the kitchen when you were painting, and and then you had to deal with that's when it brought forth more of the um relationships with your
Load full transcript
mom and you found your backbone through that experience.
00:06:14.480 --> 00:06:15.839
Is that what I'm getting?
00:06:16.240 --> 00:06:18.800
Through the healing from that experience primarily.
00:06:19.120 --> 00:06:25.759
And let me correct, it wasn't a husband, it was a just an ex person I was in a relationship with.
00:06:26.240 --> 00:06:26.560
Okay.
00:06:26.879 --> 00:06:40.560
But yes, it did in the in the in the healing part of that journey, it did remind me where I had attached in ways that were not healthy.
00:06:40.720 --> 00:06:45.759
And it taught me how to have healthier attachments instead of attachment, I call it connection now.
00:06:46.079 --> 00:06:53.839
Um, and it showed me where I had put parts of myself in shadow, hid myself.
00:06:54.160 --> 00:07:00.639
And now, you know, I speak to those parts of my ancestors that didn't get to have a voice.
00:07:00.800 --> 00:07:08.879
You know, I get to have that voice, and I'm not so worried about somebody trying to kill me for something I say, right?
00:07:09.199 --> 00:07:14.879
I'm not so worried about my own safety um by being sovereign and speaking my mind.
00:07:15.120 --> 00:07:18.160
So and I don't have to put up with abuse.
00:07:18.560 --> 00:07:20.160
So I'm sorry.
00:07:20.319 --> 00:07:36.399
I mean, I kind of understand everything that um you're saying, but I think someone who doesn't understand generational um that we take things through, like whatever happened to maybe your great-great-great-great grandmother, gets passed down from generation to generation.
00:07:36.959 --> 00:07:40.959
So when you recognize this, well, first of all, how do you recognize it?
00:07:41.040 --> 00:07:48.000
And then once you do recognize it, how do you go about fixing it or changing it?
00:07:48.560 --> 00:07:53.279
That's a really good question because that's what I specialize in as a psychotherapist.
00:07:53.439 --> 00:08:02.160
Um, and I use an integrative approach, uh, combining clinical skills, various energy healing modalities, and shamanic practices.
00:08:02.399 --> 00:08:03.839
How do you identify that?
00:08:04.000 --> 00:08:07.360
One, look at where some of your core beliefs come from.
00:08:08.079 --> 00:08:09.279
Is that your voice?
00:08:09.439 --> 00:08:14.879
Is that your soul voice, or is that coming from the voice of the critics around you when you were a child?
00:08:14.959 --> 00:08:16.879
Are you repeating patterns?
00:08:17.439 --> 00:08:28.399
I have seen with my own eyes a client have a trauma reaction about something that they had never experienced themselves, but their grandmother had.
00:08:28.560 --> 00:08:40.399
And if anybody's familiar with Professor Vanderkocht's book, The Body Keeps the Score, you you kind of understand that we can carry that in our DNA and pass it down until it hits the person who can heal it.
00:08:40.639 --> 00:08:42.159
Yeah, I I agree with that.
00:08:42.240 --> 00:08:45.919
I I understand what that that means.
00:08:46.480 --> 00:09:06.879
And um have worked with with someone on some of those those issues, but but it takes finding someone like you or the other the person that I worked with to I it takes being open to even that that even exists.
00:09:07.200 --> 00:09:16.320
Like if I was to sit with my I know some of my girlfriends, they'd be like, oh my god, Polly, you're like you're crazy, you know what I mean?
00:09:16.399 --> 00:09:30.559
Like and and for for for someone who who doesn't understand, I mean how do they how do they learn more and how do they recognize that that might be happening within themselves?
00:09:30.720 --> 00:09:32.159
I mean, you mentioned a book.
00:09:32.399 --> 00:09:34.080
Is that book explain?
00:09:35.200 --> 00:09:52.639
Yes, yes, it it it does definitely explain how a traumatic experience, whether it's yours or an ancestor's, uh, can have such an impact on your nervous system that the chemistry, even your nervous system is your electrical system, right?
00:09:52.879 --> 00:09:59.039
And trauma is an energy by definition that overwhelms the nervous system that sends you into fight, flatter freeze, right?
00:09:59.200 --> 00:09:59.440
Right.
00:09:59.919 --> 00:10:19.519
So if that is not processed very quickly and transmuted out through expression verbally, uh, through your emotional expression, potentially artistically, and then finding meaning in the experience, uh, then one's nervous system holds on to that.
00:10:19.759 --> 00:10:27.120
And you walk around operating in almost like hypervigilance, constantly looking for the next thing that's a threat.
00:10:27.200 --> 00:10:34.639
And that means that whatever intuition got expanded in that moment of trauma is finite based on fear.
00:10:34.720 --> 00:10:36.080
It's locked into fear.
00:10:36.320 --> 00:10:48.159
And the beautiful thing is as the person learns to feel that energy for themselves, and yes, you have to be open to this, you have to have a little, at least for my approach, you have to have a little bit of awareness at least of this and be open-minded.
00:10:48.320 --> 00:11:10.320
Um, as that person learns to feel that energy for themselves and learns to start transmuting that, I watch their intuition expand because they go from being in fear all the time, scanning the environment, to learning how to love themselves again, saying, Wow, there must be something really important about me for me to have had this experience.
00:11:10.480 --> 00:11:11.919
And what does it mean to me?
00:11:12.080 --> 00:11:16.639
And so I see their intuition then expand because it's based in self-love.
00:11:16.720 --> 00:11:21.759
And now they're looking for connection and guidance rather than the threat.
00:11:22.720 --> 00:11:49.279
Yeah, and and the process, at least kind of like what I worked through when I was was recognizing that stuff, is I don't want to say um it's simple, but it's not, it's not like traditional, at least for me, it was not traditional therapy where you went in and
just talked about your problems over and over again.
00:11:49.440 --> 00:11:56.080
You're actually trying to figure out where that is inside of your body and how you're going to release that.
00:11:56.240 --> 00:11:58.000
Do I have that correct?
00:11:58.720 --> 00:11:59.840
Yes, that's part of it.
00:12:00.000 --> 00:12:00.159
Okay.
00:12:00.320 --> 00:12:01.039
Yes, that's part of it.
00:12:01.120 --> 00:12:07.759
And I do use many different clinical approaches uh along with that, depending on what the person needs.
00:12:08.000 --> 00:12:11.200
And the gold standard these days these days is EMDR.
00:12:11.440 --> 00:12:11.600
Yeah.
00:12:11.759 --> 00:12:12.960
I was gonna ask you about that.
00:12:13.120 --> 00:12:13.360
Yeah.
00:12:14.480 --> 00:12:24.240
Well, and I and it does have a good place, it helps with some processing and desensitization, but it does not remove, does not transmute.
00:12:24.399 --> 00:12:25.519
And that is the challenge.
00:12:25.600 --> 00:12:35.279
I have had many clients come in, sit down on my couch for the first time and say, I did EMDR years ago and it really helped for a couple of years there or whatever.
00:12:35.600 --> 00:12:37.039
But now, right?
00:12:37.200 --> 00:12:46.720
And I'm like, you rewired your brain, you got some distance from what happened, you processed and made a little meaning, but you did not transmute the energy.
00:12:47.039 --> 00:12:48.559
And that's what's key.
00:12:48.879 --> 00:12:50.159
That is what's key.
00:12:50.320 --> 00:12:55.519
If you have a flower growing in a toxic environment, you don't fix the flower, you fix the environment.
00:12:55.679 --> 00:13:11.600
So, what I do is on the front end, as I'm building relationship with my clients, as I am um sort of teaching them some coping skills along the way as we're building that rapport, I help them transmute that energy as early as possible.
00:13:11.759 --> 00:13:13.120
So it's out of the way.
00:13:13.440 --> 00:13:21.519
Then we deal with what are the images that linger, what are the feelings, where in my body do I feel like that affected me?
00:13:22.000 --> 00:13:33.519
Um, and it's so much, I would say it's not an easy process for anyone, but I would say it's a little bit more smooth and it's long-lasting.
00:13:33.759 --> 00:13:40.320
I have clients who years later have come to me and said, Wow, you know, I'm loving life.
00:13:40.399 --> 00:13:41.440
I'm a healer myself.
00:13:41.519 --> 00:13:48.320
And a lot of people who've been through trauma and healed through trauma also recognize that they tend to move towards being a healer of some form.
00:13:48.399 --> 00:13:59.279
I don't care if you're a lawyer or a school teacher or whatnot, you still find this energy about you that provides a space that holds space for other people to be able to heal.
00:13:59.360 --> 00:14:11.360
And sometimes you provide that guidance, and a lot of times all another person needs from you to feel that healing from you is me too.
00:14:12.399 --> 00:14:13.759
Or I get it.
00:14:14.080 --> 00:14:24.399
Oh that's huge when somebody actually understands um what you're feeling instead of trying to fix you, they just try to understand.
00:14:24.720 --> 00:14:39.200
Now, I I want to go back to something that I find very, very interesting, and that was how you said that something that might have happened many generations before keeps repeating itself.
00:14:39.679 --> 00:14:47.840
I might be paraphrasing a little bit, but keeps repeating itself to get to the person who um can change it.
00:14:48.879 --> 00:14:50.399
That is so cool.
00:14:50.559 --> 00:14:52.320
And I just want to know a ton more.
00:14:52.559 --> 00:14:54.080
I just want to know a ton more.
00:14:55.360 --> 00:15:03.440
Well, okay, so let's the let's look at just the divine feminine, right?
00:15:03.679 --> 00:15:19.759
What we understand of the energy of divine feminine, and how 2,000 plus years ago the divine feminine was literally bastardized, uh, was taken out of her rightful place, her partner was killed, right?
00:15:20.000 --> 00:15:31.600
She was called a prostitute, she was turned, she went from being a sacred portal through which worlds are birthed, to a bitch with a uterus, right?
00:15:32.799 --> 00:15:44.720
So all this time, these I would say, systems of control, all this conditioning over time, right, has gotten us to the point where we are now, and look how healthy our society is.
00:15:45.600 --> 00:15:47.600
I think you're being sarcastic, right?
00:15:48.000 --> 00:15:50.159
I am very much being sarcastic.
00:15:50.799 --> 00:16:02.159
So if you think about how just a mindset, how the way we uh interact and approach and define one another can be affected in one generation.
00:16:02.399 --> 00:16:05.360
Imagine 2,000 years of that, right?
00:16:06.320 --> 00:16:19.840
So science has proven so far that we can carry through the mitochondria from female to female to female signatures in our DNA from trauma up to at least three generations back.
00:16:20.000 --> 00:16:22.559
That would be like my great-grandmother.
00:16:22.799 --> 00:16:35.279
Um, but I suspect it goes way further back than that because when you start to learn how to read energy and tap into energy, you can sense different things about your own DNA.
00:16:35.440 --> 00:16:39.279
And I'm not going into all of that right now, that might be a whole nother podcast.
00:16:39.600 --> 00:16:39.919
Right.
00:16:40.559 --> 00:16:44.960
But if you can say just the last three generations, right?
00:16:45.360 --> 00:16:58.080
If your great-grandmother, let's say she was raped, okay, and she never really processed that because she grew up in a very, say, primitive Baptist environment where they didn't talk about sex.
00:16:58.480 --> 00:17:05.200
And if a man had overcome a woman and abused her in some way, you just swept it under the rug.
00:17:05.359 --> 00:17:08.319
It was the way the culture kind of was at the time, right?
00:17:08.880
--> 00:17:24.640
So her daughter would inherit not only that trauma through the DNA, but those learned behaviors, those thoughts about those core beliefs about self, like I'm dirty, I'm ruined, whatever, right?
00:17:25.119 --> 00:17:28.240
Um, behaviors on how they cope with things.
00:17:28.559 --> 00:17:34.640
So someone who went through that back in that generation would have likely kind of been shut down.
00:17:35.039 --> 00:17:40.720
They would have been sort of withdrawn from others, oftentimes, uh, maybe even just angry.
00:17:41.200 --> 00:17:45.599
Depends on how that person tended to uh react and respond.
00:17:46.160 --> 00:17:54.640
So then you have that person's grandchildren having this trickle-down effect, right?
00:17:54.960 --> 00:17:56.559
Not just the trauma.
00:17:56.799 --> 00:18:05.759
Now, that woman's child, that woman's daughter, how is she gonna deal with something that's not even hers if her mom can't deal with it?
00:18:07.359 --> 00:18:18.960
So it gets passed down, it gets passed down, and then it hits the person who has what our generation has brought, information at our fingertips so we can learn about these things.
00:18:19.119 --> 00:18:23.759
Uh, more open-mindedness to say, hey, that doesn't mean you're dirty.
00:18:23.839 --> 00:18:25.279
That doesn't mean something's wrong with you.
00:18:25.359 --> 00:18:29.279
That means somebody else did something to you that was not okay, period.
00:18:29.519 --> 00:18:29.920
Right?
00:18:30.160 --> 00:18:31.440
The mindset changes.
00:18:31.599 --> 00:18:34.400
We raise in consciousness as technology improves.
00:18:34.559 --> 00:18:34.880
Right.
00:18:35.039 --> 00:18:39.119
The more we have connection with one another, the more supported we feel.
00:18:39.359 --> 00:18:48.559
So when it hits that person that says, you know what, I don't know everything that happened, maybe, but I know I don't want to be like my mom was.
00:18:48.720 --> 00:18:50.559
I don't want to be like my grandmother was.
00:18:50.799 --> 00:18:51.200
Right.
00:18:51.440 --> 00:18:53.359
So I want to do different.
00:18:54.480 --> 00:18:54.799
Okay.
00:18:55.440 --> 00:18:56.720
That makes sense.
00:18:57.039 --> 00:18:59.519
Now, I I'm assuming that's not just for women.
00:18:59.599 --> 00:19:02.640
I'm sure I'm assuming it's all genders, correct?
00:19:03.359 --> 00:19:17.200
Yes, and what I say, the reason I say women is because scientifically we can prove through the mitochondria the RNA of DNA can show those markers being passed down at least through generations.
00:19:17.279 --> 00:19:20.640
But of course, you know, it goes a lot further back than that.
00:19:22.000 --> 00:19:30.240
I it's it's it has to be fascinating what you what you do when you work with people to to to Oh, it absolutely is.
00:19:31.920 --> 00:19:35.119
I feel so blessed and honored to get to do what I do.
00:19:35.440 --> 00:19:36.079
Right.
00:19:36.640 --> 00:19:46.880
And the stories you must kind of hear and help
people work through and to see the the changes within them.
00:19:47.200 --> 00:20:06.160
What is like when you think about well, first of all, how did you I mean, through all the things that you went through, were you this person before all the challenges that you had, or did you morph into this because of all the things that had happened to you?
00:20:06.960 --> 00:20:10.079
I would say I was led, I was guided.
00:20:10.319 --> 00:20:19.759
And that was more of a morphing process because um I grew up a very intuitive child, very intuitive empath kind of child.
00:20:20.000 --> 00:20:25.279
And I think part of it, you know, of course, when we're we're really little, we're wide open.
00:20:25.359 --> 00:20:29.759
We are very sensitive and we pick up on everything in our environment to a degree.
00:20:30.000 --> 00:20:32.880
Well, I had a near-death experience at age five.
00:20:33.119 --> 00:20:37.279
And then a few months later, I had encephalitis from chicken pox that didn't break out.
00:20:37.359 --> 00:20:41.039
So I had a really bad fever and I was having out-of-body experiences.
00:20:41.279 --> 00:20:46.960
I was uh, you know, exploring the hospital, coming back, and then telling my mom what I would see.
00:20:47.519 --> 00:20:51.680
And she would go in and validate and told me, okay, then there's something to this.
00:20:51.839 --> 00:21:01.839
So, you know, I think truly looking back on it from a professional point of view, my nervous system was definitely changed at that age.
00:21:02.160 --> 00:21:10.160
And um I was so wide open, I didn't have those energetic boundaries that I really needed.
00:21:10.480 --> 00:21:19.039
So empathically, I took on everybody's stuff until I realized later in life that that's what I was doing, and I learned some emotional boundaries as well.
00:21:19.359 --> 00:21:33.839
But as a highly intuitive child, which what we call on the neurodivergent spectrum, HSP, which is highly sensitive person, that's on the other end of the spectrum from autistic disorders of autism disorders.
00:21:34.160 --> 00:21:40.480
Um, because I did feel everything like sensory-wise, it was very challenging.
00:21:40.799 --> 00:21:58.400
Um because not only were my basic five senses constantly overwhelmed, my intuitive capabilities were constantly in motion, and I was dealing with trauma from my own family at home.
00:21:58.480 --> 00:22:00.960
Uh, my mother was uh Mentally ill.
00:22:01.039 --> 00:22:03.680
My grandmother had her own mental health challenges.
00:22:03.920 --> 00:22:09.119
And of course, all of that was a trickle-down effect of trauma from previous generations.
00:22:09.359 --> 00:22:12.240
And so I grew up the weird kid in school.
00:22:12.400 --> 00:22:13.680
I was the weird kid.
00:22:15.359 --> 00:22:18.799
I was the kid who felt everything but didn't know that was what was going on.
00:22:18.880 --> 00:22:22.400
And it really took, and I tried as a teen to fit in.
00:22:22.480 --> 00:22:26.400
I tried to numb it out or dumb it down or whatever, and that did not work.
00:22:26.559 --> 00:22:39.440
Um, and it wasn't until I got to the University of West Georgia, not far from my home, in fact, where the psychology department here is um humanistic transpersonal.
00:22:39.519 --> 00:22:41.359
It's not your typical rats and mazes.
00:22:41.440 --> 00:22:45.279
It's one of, I think, four programs in the country.
00:22:45.440 --> 00:22:47.440
Um, and it had a clinical track.
00:22:47.519 --> 00:22:49.359
And I was like, this is right up my alley.
00:22:49.440 --> 00:22:57.200
This was the first time I ever felt like I was truly seen and heard and didn't feel crazy.
00:22:57.440 --> 00:22:59.680
In fact, I felt blessed.
00:22:59.920 --> 00:23:08.799
Now, underneath all of this, I don't to this day still don't know exactly what this is about, but I'm I'm starting to get there.
00:23:09.599 --> 00:23:13.680
I had this deep sense of spiritual integrity.
00:23:14.000 --> 00:23:16.480
I don't know why, I don't know where it comes from.
00:23:16.640 --> 00:23:20.720
I just know that I've always had this sense of spiritual integrity.
00:23:21.039 --> 00:23:23.759
And that doesn't mean I've been perfect by any means.
00:23:23.839 --> 00:23:25.359
I don't even know what perfect means.
00:23:25.599 --> 00:23:27.759
I wish I knew who coined the term.
00:23:28.720 --> 00:23:43.839
Um so I would say all of my experiences, the spiritual integrity as well, spiritual resiliency, uh, along with just general resiliency and my sensitivities.
00:23:44.000 --> 00:23:47.599
My I had a lot of mystical experiences as a child.
00:23:48.079 --> 00:23:57.680
I think all of it, it was just sort of like being guided along the way, not realizing I was being guided until I got to a certain point.
00:23:58.000 --> 00:24:05.519
And each experience I had built something that helped me get through the next one, and so on and so forth.
00:24:05.839 --> 00:24:10.559
And things really shifted um three years ago.
00:24:11.200 --> 00:24:15.920
And it's sort of like everything started to make sense when I looked back on my life.
00:24:17.119 --> 00:24:23.519
That's that sounds like a lot of people who I know that have I'm just gonna call it a bit of a gift.
00:24:23.759 --> 00:24:32.400
It's kind of the same thing that they started to see it when it was younger, it it didn't truly manifest into what it was until later in life.
00:24:32.559 --> 00:24:38.240
And it was because they had to really become open to what was happening within them.
00:24:38.559 --> 00:25:01.279
So if you if there's a uh a woman who's listening to this today, and she's like, what is like she knows that she can feel something within her energy, and is there something that she can just is it taking a deep breath or is it tapping?
00:25:01.359 --> 00:25:09.200
Is it is it something that that can change that energy for her at that moment?
00:25:09.599 --> 00:25:12.319
I mean, what what is like a tool that we could use?
00:25:13.119 --> 00:25:15.920
Well, your bet your breath is your best friend.
00:25:16.000 --> 00:25:29.519
If you really think about it, like we know from studies that deep breathing helps regulate the nervous system, it calms the vagal nerve, and the vagal nerve is the one at the base of the brain that's saying, Hey, we're in danger of fight, flood or freeze, right?
00:25:29.759 --> 00:25:39.680
So having that deep breath helps get that oxygenated blood to that part of the body and it tells that nerve, hey, we're okay, we're we're really okay.
00:25:40.079 --> 00:25:42.160
So we we start to regulate.
00:25:42.799 --> 00:26:04.480
When you when you calm down into a more regulated state, if you can think to do this one thing, it will be so beneficial if you can say to yourself, even if I don't trust what's going on, even if I don't trust the people around me, even if I don't trust anything else, I can trust my inner knowing.
00:26:05.599 --> 00:26:15.680
I can trust my inner knowing because there's something, and I think almost every woman recognizes this that there's something more to life than what we've been handed.
00:26:15.920 --> 00:26:21.680
There's something more to us beyond the religions that we have been taught.
00:26:21.839 --> 00:26:34.480
There's something more to us than just being, you know, live, die, live, work, yeah, taxes and die.
00:26:34.640 --> 00:26:37.519
You know, there's more to life than just what we've been handed.
00:26:37.680 --> 00:26:54.799
And I think what we're seeing right now, and I can't say it's just women because I'm not trying to be exclusive, but what I'm saying is that feminine, those feminine energies, those feminine, that sense of feminine divine feminine, is sort of coming to the surface again.
00:26:54.960 --> 00:26:58.319
People are seeing it again because knowledge is coming up.
00:26:58.480 --> 00:27:00.400
There is more information available.
00:27:00.640 --> 00:27:03.519
Women are saying, wait a minute, I'm not gonna play small.
00:27:03.680 --> 00:27:05.440
Like this is not okay, right?
00:27:05.680 --> 00:27:06.319
Right.
00:27:06.640 --> 00:27:13.279
And what you're seeing is a lot of women who are saying, Wow, wait, being intuitive is normal.
00:27:13.519 --> 00:27:14.640
It's not woo-woo.
00:27:14.880 --> 00:27:15.839
Oh, it's always that.
00:27:15.920 --> 00:27:24.160
It's just the the little thing inside your gut that's saying, Hey, this isn't right, or yes, this is right.
00:27:24.480 --> 00:27:27.680
You know, the thing that we can you just trust it.
00:27:27.920 --> 00:27:38.079
Yeah, that's I think that's the hardest part for a lot of people is Yeah, because we've been told we're powerless, we're helpless, we can't trust our the voices in our heads.
00:27:38.240 --> 00:27:47.680
Like we've been so conditioned for so long, we don't realize just how masculinized women actually are in this day and age.
00:27:48.319 --> 00:27:53.839
Yeah, it's um yeah, we're masculinized and we've demasculated a lot of males.
00:27:54.240 --> 00:27:58.480
Um yeah, roles have roles have changed.
00:27:58.720 --> 00:28:06.240
And yes, and even down to yeah, it's go ahead and say I think it's just when you get it, you get it.
00:28:06.480 --> 00:28:11.519
And and when it's just some people just may never get it.
00:28:11.599 --> 00:28:14.240
And and that's the unfortunate reality.
00:28:14.480 --> 00:28:16.559
Yeah, it is some people won't.
00:28:16.720 --> 00:28:27.599
Some people will get just enough information that they see hope and then they're too fearful, and they will turn around and live in willful ignorance.
00:28:28.160 --> 00:28:36.880
Well, I think that's what every challenging every person that I talk to, it all comes down to to fear and limiting beliefs.
00:28:36.960 --> 00:28:47.119
It's it's what you've been what you've been or somebody's been telling you most of your life, and you're afraid to take that next step because you don't know what's gonna happen.
00:28:47.359 --> 00:28:52.160
And really, in any situation, is just take it, just take the step.
00:28:52.400 --> 00:28:54.160
Yes, what's the worst that can happen?
00:28:54.960 --> 00:28:55.279
Right.
00:28:55.440 --> 00:28:58.960
In those situations, I'm likely to tell somebody, choose.
00:29:00.240 --> 00:29:02.880
Do you want to continue this way?
00:29:03.279 --> 00:29:05.039
Or do you want to take a chance?
00:29:05.279 --> 00:29:17.599
There are so many times in my life that I faced such overwhelming anxiety, and I had to force myself to say, I choose love over fear, I choose love over fear, I choose love over fear.
00:29:17.920 --> 00:29:19.359
Yes, I understand that.
00:29:19.519 --> 00:29:22.720
And that's the only way I got through those moments.
00:29:22.960 --> 00:29:23.359
Yeah.
00:29:23.599 --> 00:29:36.160
And I didn't want to repeat what I had seen, at least, I mean, though, it not to say that my family was so bad, but I didn't want to repeat those parts that I saw as unhealthy, that I saw were harmful.
00:29:36.319 --> 00:29:39.200
Yes, my mom loved me and she hurt me, right?
00:29:39.279 --> 00:29:47.519
We can hold both at one time, but I can choose not to continue doing the same things I saw or experienced that hurt me.
00:29:47.839 --> 00:29:49.839
And that will change that for my children.
00:29:50.160 --> 00:29:53.759
Yeah, and that'll change the next generation and the generation after that.
00:29:53.920 --> 00:30:08.240
It's it's it's like one person can change the past and the future by just recognizing some things and changing just a little bit about yourself and how how you handle situations or letting go of of things.
00:30:08.319 --> 00:30:08.640
Yeah.
00:30:08.799 --> 00:30:10.559
Um, it's a fascinating subject.
00:30:10.640 --> 00:30:13.920
We could probably talk all day about it.
00:30:14.400 --> 00:30:26.240
And I just know that somebody's gonna listen to this and they're just gonna go not not getting it until the day something finally
triggers and and you and you that you get it.
00:30:26.480 --> 00:30:26.880
Yeah.
00:30:27.200 --> 00:30:29.920
But a lot of my work is also planting seeds.
00:30:30.160 --> 00:30:32.480
Yes, plant the seed, plant the seed.
00:30:32.799 --> 00:30:35.279
Mindy, it's been a pleasure talking with you.
00:30:35.359 --> 00:30:39.839
And like I said, I could talk to you forever because there's even more that I want to pick your brain on it.
00:30:39.920 --> 00:30:43.599
But you know, we only have so many time, so much time, so much time.
00:30:43.759 --> 00:30:45.359
So it has been such a pleasure.
00:30:45.519 --> 00:30:51.680
I've enjoyed talking with you and learned a lot, and there's a lot more that I want to learn myself.
00:30:51.839 --> 00:30:58.559
And and I I went I got on my journey about five years ago, and um it's been pretty exciting.
00:30:59.759 --> 00:31:00.480
Figuring it out.
00:31:00.720 --> 00:31:02.079
Yes, yes, just figuring it out.
00:31:02.319 --> 00:31:04.400
And it's been a pleasure to be here.
00:31:04.720 --> 00:31:04.960
Thank you.
00:31:05.200 --> 00:31:14.000
I always enjoy having any kind of space where there is that freedom to speak the truth about things that are really important.
00:31:15.680 --> 00:31:27.759
Yeah, and I hope that somebody does listen to this and either reaches out to you for for for um you know to further the conversation or starts doing their own research.
00:31:27.920 --> 00:31:28.559
That's what I did.
00:31:28.640 --> 00:31:30.960
I just googled it and just started to try to figure it out.
00:31:31.039 --> 00:31:37.680
Yes, and all the right people, all the right people sent started to to land in into my path because I was open to it.
00:31:38.000 --> 00:31:43.279
Go to chat GPT and say, how do you how does energy healing work with healing trauma?
00:31:43.359 --> 00:31:44.640
And just see what comes up.
00:31:44.799 --> 00:31:45.599
You know, just be open.
00:31:45.759 --> 00:31:47.039
He's everybody's new best friend.
00:31:47.200 --> 00:31:47.759
Mine's a guy.
00:31:47.839 --> 00:31:50.319
I don't know if yours is a guy or a girl, but I mine's a guy.
00:31:50.400 --> 00:31:52.640
So well, I have a lot of different ones.
00:31:52.720 --> 00:31:54.960
Yeah, they all have different names.
00:31:55.200 --> 00:31:56.880
Anyway, it was a pleasure.
00:31:57.119 --> 00:32:00.319
Um, um, I really did enjoy take talking with you.
00:32:00.640 --> 00:32:03.119
So I just wish you well and take care of yourself.
00:32:03.279 --> 00:32:03.680
Yes.
00:32:03.920 --> 00:32:04.319
Thank you.
00:32:04.559 --> 00:32:05.599
Thank you very much.
00:32:05.839 --> 00:32:10.799
Thank you for joining us for another episode of Unstoppable with Paula Swain.
00:32:10.960 --> 00:32:23.680
If today's conversation left you thinking about your own story and what might come next, come find Paula at Soar from Silence, a place for real conversation, real life, and figuring out what's next.
00:32:23.839 --> 00:32:25.680
You'll find the link in the show notes.
00:32:25.839 --> 00:32:30.160
Until then, remember your story isn't over yet.