บทถอดความฉบับเต็มของ Two Can Play That Game

voiceover, and I don't consider that a break in the wall. 00:04:11.520 --> 00:04:17.680 Breaking the fourth wall is a fantastic way to gain an audience's support or demonstrate how, forgive me, clueless they are about dating. 00:04:17.839 --> 00:04:21.040 So here's Vivica explaining how dating is. 00:04:21.279 --> 00:04:22.079 Oh hey. 00:04:22.240 --> 00:04:24.079 Sorry, I'm a little pissed off right now. 00:04:24.160 --> 00:04:26.240 But my best friend Karen is having man trouble. 00:04:26.399 --> 00:04:28.959 Miss Smith, Tracy Johnson's online too. 00:04:29.279 --> 00:04:32.240 Tell her I'm in a meeting, but I'll be there in an hour. 00:04:33.279 --> 00:04:35.839 Tracy, another one of my girlfriends. 00:04:36.160 --> 00:04:37.279 Man trouble too. 00:04:37.920 --> 00:04:40.879 Seems like every woman I know is having man trouble. 00:04:41.920 --> 00:04:46.879 Have you ever noticed around spring, say early summer, men start to act up a little bit? 00:04:47.120 --> 00:04:48.560 Mm-hmm, they do. 00:04:48.800 --> 00:04:52.879 See, they don't act up in the wintertime because they want to get that indoor activity going on. 00:04:53.040 --> 00:04:53.519 Mm-hmm. 00:04:53.759 --> 00:04:57.600 But as soon as the season breaks, girl, they show their asses. 00:04:57.839 --> 00:04:58.639 It's true. 00:04:58.879 --> 00:05:03.120 It happens every year around spring, the breakup season. 00:05:03.360 --> 00:05:11.600 The time of year when women start wearing little mini skirts and skimpy clothes, letting their little stuff just hang all out, causing men to lose their damn mind. 00:05:13.360 --> 00:05:14.160 Spring. 00:05:14.399 --> 00:05:22.319 The time of year when I have to counsel all of my girlfriends on how to keep their no-good, unable to say no, men in line. 00:05:26.240 --> 00:05:29.040 It's amazing what a little warm weather can do. 00:05:29.439 --> 00:05:42.079 So the reason her character arc is so satisfying is the confidence that Vivica starts off with, and both her big talk and strategies to control Morris Chestnut, well, it fizzles out, and at the end she realizes she doesn't need to manipulate the man she wants to keep. 00:05:42.240 --> 00:05:47.600 It also helps that Morris Chestnut doesn't talk to camera with anything near the arrogance that she does. 00:05:47.680 --> 00:05:53.199 Uh, he's kind of dumb and he's being fed bad advice by Anthony Anderson because Anderson wants to live vicariously through him. 00:05:53.439 --> 00:05:55.439 It's not a whole bunch different from Fox and the ladies. 00:05:55.600 --> 00:06:00.639 She has no business giving them advice, but it does demonstrate how supportive she is of her friends. 00:06:00.959 --> 00:06:04.959 Listen to the way Anthony Anderson speaks in this movie and then remember Vivica. 00:06:05.519 --> 00:06:06.720 Hold on one second, though. 00:06:08.720 --> 00:06:18.720 Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I intend to prove that the witness, Keith Fenton, has perjured himself in the court of law. 00:06:18.879 --> 00:06:19.920 Joe Brown, you wanna sit down and please. 00:06:21.519 --> 00:06:22.959 May I approach the witness, Your Honor? 00:06:23.199 --> 00:06:27.120 May I have your permission to treat the witness as a hostile witness. 00:06:27.439 --> 00:06:28.240 Oh, thank you. 00:06:28.560 --> 00:06:28.879 Keith. 00:06:29.920 --> 00:06:31.600 I'm a tad bit confused. 00:06:31.920 --> 00:06:34.639 And maybe you can help me understand a few things. 00:06:34.959 --> 00:06:45.839 You took this 26-year-old, supple breasted, tight-assed, skin so smooth, it looked like buttermilk. 00:06:46.000 --> 00:06:49.680 You took that to a secluded restaurant and danced with that. 00:06:49.759 --> 00:06:53.199 And then when you got caught by Shantae, you acted guilty. 00:06:53.360 --> 00:06:53.839 Why? 00:06:54.000 --> 00:06:55.120 Because you wanted to hit it. 00:06:55.839 --> 00:06:57.199 Oh no, Keith, you wanted to hit it. 00:06:57.439 --> 00:06:58.319 I did not want to hit it. 00:06:59.759 --> 00:07:01.199 You wanted to bend it up here. 00:07:01.600 --> 00:07:03.120 You wanted to tap that ass. 00:07:03.680 --> 00:07:05.519 Deep down in the Lord. 00:07:06.079 --> 00:07:06.879 You left it for it. 00:07:07.439 --> 00:07:08.319 Okay, okay. 00:07:08.480 --> 00:07:08.959 Alright. 00:07:09.759 --> 00:07:11.120 Maybe a little bit I left it for. 00:07:11.360 --> 00:07:11.600 Alright? 00:07:11.920 --> 00:07:12.720 Is she fine? 00:07:13.279 --> 00:07:13.839 Good. 00:07:14.240 --> 00:07:15.759 Now we're getting somewhere. 00:07:16.240 --> 00:07:16.560 Siki? 00:07:17.519 --> 00:07:18.800 You're guilty, dog. 00:07:19.519 --> 00:07:20.399 Guilty. 00:07:23.680 --> 00:07:24.079 Alright? 00:07:24.639 --> 00:07:24.959 Okay. 00:07:25.199 --> 00:07:26.800 And secretly you wanted to hear it. 00:07:27.040 --> 00:07:27.680 Alright, cool. 00:07:27.920 --> 00:07:28.879 Whatever you say, dog. 00:07:29.120 --> 00:07:30.480 What do we do right now? 00:07:36.639 --> 00:07:37.600 We wait. 00:07:38.720 --> 00:07:40.800 This movie is written and directed by Mark Brown. 00:07:40.959 --> 00:07:43.920 Most chick flicks, so I know that's a derisive name, are made by men. 00:07:44.079 --> 00:07:44.480 Alright? 00:07:44.639 --> 00:07:47.360 So all the monologues and ideas come from him. 00:07:47.600 --> 00:07:49.519 Tell me, could you gender swap this? 00:07:49.839 --> 00:07:56.079 If you started with Anthony Anderson spouting about relationships and how to keep yo woman, yeah, it's called hitch. 00:07:56.399 --> 00:07:57.199 Basic principles. 00:07:58.240 --> 00:08:03.199 No woman wakes up saying, God, I hope I don't get swept off my feet today. 00:08:06.399 --> 00:08:10.959 Now, she might say, This is a really bad time for me. 00:08:13.360 --> 00:08:17.360 Or something like, I just need some space. 00:08:18.879 --> 00:08:20.879 Or my personal favorite. 00:08:21.600 --> 00:08:23.839 I'm really into my career right now. 00:08:27.519 --> 00:08:28.240 You believe that? 00:08:28.800 -->

00:08:29.600 Neither does she. 00:08:30.319 --> 00:08:30.879 You know why? 00:08:31.360 --> 00:08:32.799 Because she's lying to you. 00:08:33.360 --> 00:08:33.919 That's why. 00:08:34.639 --> 00:08:35.360 You understand me? 00:08:36.399 --> 00:08:36.879 Lying. 00:08:37.120 --> 00:08:38.639 Now Hitch is a decent movie. 00:08:38.879 --> 00:08:44.080 I'm still mad at Big Willie, and while he did not return for the Independence Day sequel, Bible A. 00:08:44.159 --> 00:08:45.200 Fox sure did. 00:08:45.440 --> 00:08:50.480 Before I drop it, sometimes I think I'm so clever, and then I listen to the commentary and I feel less special. 00:08:51.279 --> 00:08:52.720 Then he looked at me. 00:08:52.960 --> 00:08:53.679 And for a second. 00:08:54.080 --> 00:09:01.519 There's one interesting thing about this picture that I I liked is is that Shantae actually breaks the fourth wall. 00:09:02.320 --> 00:09:02.639 You know. 00:09:03.039 --> 00:09:10.879 And and there was much debate as to whether or not it would work or or if it would be too imposing. 00:09:11.600 --> 00:09:16.000 I mean, one of my favorite movies of all time was was Farris Beeler's Day Off. 00:09:17.120 --> 00:09:21.919 And I remember I originally wrote it when I wrote How to Be a Player. 00:09:24.639 --> 00:09:27.039 But at the last minute they took it out. 00:09:27.919 --> 00:09:33.279 So I was determined to show that it really can work and it can work effectively. 00:09:33.840 --> 00:09:35.440 Back to Anderson for a moment. 00:09:35.600 --> 00:09:36.639 Okay, real talk. 00:09:36.799 --> 00:09:43.840 I don't want to exaggerate the importance of shutting down an ambitious young white man, but cutting us down a bit tends to protect us in the long run. 00:09:44.000 --> 00:09:49.039 I've previously stated my affinity for black culture and how readily I took exactly what I wanted from it. 00:09:49.200 --> 00:09:54.399 In 2003, I got hit with a one-two punch of Malibu's Most Wanted and Scary Movie 3. 00:09:54.799 --> 00:09:59.919 Both achievements in cinema, featuring a parody of Eminem, both with Anthony Anderson. 00:10:00.159 --> 00:10:04.480 I distinctly remember thinking, I'm glad I'm not that guy, and then asking, but by how much? 00:10:04.720 --> 00:10:09.440 Jamie Kennedy as B-Rad G and Simon Rex as George are the reason I don't speak in Ebonics. 00:10:09.519 --> 00:10:12.320 It's the reason I don't dress in any way of identification. 00:10:12.480 --> 00:10:18.879 So the examples in pop culture parroting actual cultural appropriation in this instance stopped a horribly misguided kid. 00:10:19.039 --> 00:10:24.080 Alright, a small side tangent, but my friend Mike used to be the bassist and lead singer of a pretty popular metal band. 00:10:24.240 --> 00:10:30.080 I caught a few of his shows, and every time I found myself in the crowd, I began to notice how hard everyone had worked on their look. 00:10:30.240 --> 00:10:42.080 Whereas I'm wearing a fishing button-up and cargo shorts, these people

are all wearing a combination of tight, torn black jeans, a strange amount of vests, and safety pins, and I I forgot to mention it's a hundred degrees in the venue. 00:10:42.240 --> 00:10:50.000 The irony of people who work so hard to visually depict they don't care what you think, putting so much effort into cosplaying as the Adams family is so funny to me. 00:10:50.159 --> 00:10:51.759 I think bikers are like this too. 00:10:51.919 --> 00:10:55.759 Imagine becoming an adult and the little club you belong to as a dress code. 00:10:56.159 --> 00:11:04.240 But back to Anthony Anderson, in 2005, he's in Hustle and Flow as a recording tech, and his producer is DJ Qualls, ripping up an old school NPC. 00:11:04.480 --> 00:11:07.039 In the next three years, this is what I'm up to. 00:11:07.200 --> 00:11:13.759 I construct a guerrilla studio, I'm teaching my talent microphone discipline, and I start a love-hate relationship with music production. 00:11:14.000 --> 00:11:18.000 At any rate, Anthony Anderson should be acknowledged as a reason this show exists. 00:11:18.080 --> 00:11:23.120 Because a nudge in either direction, and I'd be a sneakerhead with a black scent. 00:11:23.279 --> 00:11:32.159 Oh, and though I identify as a barely Hispanic white dude, if you could see the sunburn I got yesterday morning, you'd identify me as a very steamed lobster. 00:11:32.399 --> 00:11:41.039 But because it's on the show and every time I say some celebrity was important to me, they inevitably are gonna have a controversy section in their Wikipedia, so let's cover that for the brother. 00:11:41.279 --> 00:11:49.200 In 2023, Anderson was tapped to host the 75th Emmy Awards, and suddenly everyone knew he had a long history of sexual assault allegations. 00:11:49.360 --> 00:11:55.440 Which puts a bad taste in your mouth when he's playing a horn dog in this movie, whispering in chestnut's ear to sleep with Gabrielle Union. 00:11:55.759 --> 00:12:01.360 I I swear to god, you cannot trust anyone in this industry, and your heroes are human, probably bad humans. 00:12:01.600 --> 00:12:07.600 But we should actually reflect on the lovely Viveka Fox because she gives an amazing performance in this movie. 00:12:07.759 --> 00:12:30.240 Uh before this, in the late 90s, she's Listerine and Booty Call, she's misbehaving in Batman and Robin, she's the badass mom stripper survivor in Independence Day, and I know he probably would take credit for uh her career in like reviving it, but when Quentin Tarantino puts her in Kill Bill as uh Fernita Green, I i i it's one of the things where she was still acting at the time. 00:12:30.320 --> 00:12:34.879 She constantly, she's never uh dropped off, it's just the titles she was in weren't weren't bigger. 00:12:35.120 --> 00:12:37.360 There's a whole lot of stuff that you can't even research. 00:12:37.440 --> 00:12:40.080 Nothing on IMDB or Wikipedia for a couple of these titles. 00:12:40.240 --> 00:12:41.919 Did you know there's a sequel to this movie? 00:12:42.240 --> 00:12:48.240 Yeah, in 2007, Sony Pictures Home Entertainment, so this is a direct-to-video release, and yeah, she's in it too. 00:12:48.480 --> 00:12:49.519 But let's talk today. 00:12:49.679 --> 00:12:53.519 It's 2026, she's been in five movies this year, and reprised her role as Dr. 00:12:53.600 --> 00:12:55.759 Stephanie Simmons on The Young and the Restless. 00:12:55.919 --> 00:13:01.039 She has over 250 credits, most of which are a blind spot for oblivious whites like me. 00:13:01.200 --> 00:13:03.679 Alright, um, a little more about race, I know. 00:13:03.919 --> 00:13:10.240 So the ladies in this movie, besides the lovely and natural Monique, are business casual and that goes doubly for their hair. 00:13:10.399 --> 00:13:18.159 There must be so much chemical relaxers working for them to have this look, which is probably the standard for an office-approved appearance if you have higher aspirations at the time. 00:13:18.399 --> 00:13:22.799 It's not in your face, but you're meant to notice the lack of diversity in the office. 00:13:23.039 --> 00:13:25.120 Also, body image has changed so much too. 00:13:25.360 --> 00:13:36.240 Vivek and Gabrielle are they have amazing bodies, but they're also very natural, achievable types, and like they're treated like voluptuous Jessica rabbit succubuses. 00:13:36.480 --> 00:13:45.039 And in comparison with today, women have started to do so much cosmetic alterations to their features in their 20s and 30s, I'm really starting to miss women who could frown. 00:13:45.360 --> 00:13:49.919 Ugh, and speaking of women frowning, Bobby Brown's in this movie. 00:13:50.159 --> 00:13:53.360 The creator of New Jack Swing, Whitney Houston's husband. 00:13:53.519 --> 00:14:00.799 And I didn't recognize him at first because he's introduced, he rolls out from under a car with crazy fake teeth and a really bad Jerry Crawl. 00:14:00.960 --> 00:14:05.440 When he gets like a makeover later on in the movie, I'm like, that's fucking Bobby Brown. 00:14:05.679 --> 00:14:14.799 And he doesn't have a golden reputation right now, but it's before the biggest of his controversies with Whitney, and it's unnerving how charming he is, and it's like two minutes in this movie. 00:14:15.120 --> 00:14:17.120 Okay, what other small parts do we have? 00:14:17.279 --> 00:14:21.679 We have uh gay secretary, David Crumholtz, getting a bit of mileage out of a really bad haircut. 00:14:21.919 --> 00:14:22.240 Yeah. 00:14:22.399 --> 00:14:29.919 Um, oh actually, uh I think a character in this movie is the soundtrack, and uh the soundtrack to this movie was released as an expanded mixtape. 00:14:30.080 --> 00:14:32.559 It has a great it is great hip-hop and RB. 00:14:32.720 --> 00:14:34.799 E40 and Nate Dog are on this thing. 00:14:34.960 --> 00:14:39.440 Basically any song in the movie is on it, and there's a bunch of remixes to anything that was instrumental. 00:14:39.840 --> 00:14:40.080 Alright? 00:14:40.240 -->

00:14:43.759 I haven't touched the plot much, and I think I can sum it up in one sentence. 00:14:44.159 --> 00:14:48.879 An opinionated woman catches her man dancing with a coworker and tortures him until she gets jealous. 00:14:49.120 --> 00:14:49.519 That's it. 00:14:49.679 --> 00:14:51.679 It's the Barenaked Lady song one week. 00:14:51.840 --> 00:14:54.000 It's about the performances, it's about the jokes. 00:14:54.159 --> 00:14:57.200 Thinking about it a little more, Monique is the only woman with agency. 00:14:57.360 --> 00:15:02.399 She knows her man is worthless, but she doesn't listen to Vivica, and the women who that do aren't more successful for it. 00:15:02.639 --> 00:15:07.840 Monique is a woman who has sexual needs, and she isn't surprised when Vivica's relationship is on the rocks. 00:15:08.159 --> 00:15:13.039 In 2017, there was a stage adaptation of this movie, and who do you think came back from the main role? 00:15:13.279 --> 00:15:14.559 Vivica Fuckin' A. 00:15:14.639 --> 00:15:14.960 Fox. 00:15:15.279 --> 00:15:19.759 Forgive this, but after it goes to Mars, but she is definitely my generation's Pam Greer. 00:15:19.840 --> 00:15:21.679 And this movie would do fine as a play. 00:15:21.840 --> 00:15:26.960 There is like only one nightclub or church in this damn city, and everyone gets invited to the same corporate parties. 00:15:27.120 --> 00:15:33.600 I often think if times were tough and I had more patience, I'd be that teacher adapting crazy rich agents for the stage. 00:15:33.759 --> 00:15:34.080 Why? 00:15:34.240 --> 00:15:41.600 Because I'm a hack, and if you get past the locations, the movie's just people talking, and the climax is two ladies sitting at a table playing Mahjong. 00:15:41.679 --> 00:15:46.320 And if it was like a bunch of sixth graders, I would love for them to try to understand what the hell I'm talking about. 00:15:46.559 --> 00:15:51.440 I've also I've been grading those gems on a curve, but this movie doesn't need it. 00:15:51.600 --> 00:15:57.440 I want to leave something about it, uh glass ceiling, if you will, so this is gonna be my first 9.9. 00:15:57.919 --> 00:15:59.919 I'm a sucker for romantic comedy. 00:16:00.080 --> 00:16:01.279 This is both of those. 00:16:01.440 --> 00:16:04.080 I really enjoyed it, surprised by it even. 00:16:04.639 --> 00:16:12.799 As far as money, Wikipedia says it costs 13 million, but Brown says on the commentary he made it for 5.5, which I tend to believe. 00:16:12.879 --> 00:16:16.879 I think they sold it to Screen Gems for 13 and it goes on to make 22. 00:16:17.120 --> 00:16:20.799 I'm sorry, but nobody wanted to go to the movies the week of 9-11. 00:16:20.960 --> 00:16:30.159 The box office was never gonna be better than that or bounce back for this movie, but it was a uh a good rental, and I'm telling you, this is the best movie I've covered on my show. 00:16:30.559 --> 00:16:32.399 Thank you for listening to Screen Generation. 00:16:32.559 --> 00:16:35.679 It's the podcast about the films released by Sony under the label Screen Jams. 00:16:36.000 --> 00:16:38.639 This has been the second installment of the Morris Chestnut saga. 00:16:38.799 --> 00:16:43.120 Next week we're gonna go get spooky again, and it's gonna be our second movie directed by Mark Collington. 00:16:43.279 --> 00:16:46.080 But let's let the hosts of Blank Check uh introduce this movie. 00:16:49.919 --> 00:16:56.080 Ben is about to perk up because they're full about prophecies involving the Mothman. 00:16:58.639 --> 00:17:01.840 The film Ben has hit no less than five times for an episode. 00:17:02.080 --> 00:17:03.919 I think we have to do it on Metroid. 00:17:04.079 --> 00:17:05.200 That is really delightful. 00:17:06.160 --> 00:17:08.079 Delightful is the first word I think of. 00:17:09.200 --> 00:17:10.799 And the Mothman traffic is already. 00:17:12.240 --> 00:17:14.079 It's like Richard here and Laura Lady, right? 00:17:14.160 --> 00:17:16.960 Like it's like a you know, pretty rope, you know, pretty pretty actor. 00:17:17.440 --> 00:17:18.960 And they're like, have you ever heard of the Mothman? 00:17:19.200 --> 00:17:21.839 And I'm just like leaning forward, like, the Mothman? 00:17:24.880 --> 00:17:37.759 Uh we were just making sure there was adequate closet space. 00:17:38.000 --> 00:17:38.240 Good. 00:17:38.319 --> 00:17:39.759 This house is yours if you want it. 00:17:39.920 --> 00:17:40.960 We'll take it. 00:17:50.799 --> 00:17:50.960 Okay. 00:18:01.759 --> 00:18:02.720 She knew. 00:18:02.880 --> 00:18:04.559 She was drawing angels. 00:18:08.559 --> 00:18:09.599 What are you doing here? 00:18:09.839 --> 00:18:11.519 Somehow between one and two thirty. 00:18:11.599 --> 00:18:13.039 I traveled 400 miles. 00:18:13.279 --> 00:18:14.319 I've got no memory. 00:18:14.880 --> 00:18:18.720 Past few months, people have been coming up to me and reporting strange things. 00:18:19.599 --> 00:18:22.160 Weird lights, strange phone calls. 00:18:24.079 --> 00:18:24.720 Who is this? 00:18:25.359 --> 00:18:28.960 How do you do when someone comes into your office and tells you they saw this in their backyard? 00:18:29.119 --> 00:18:31.599 Oh, I saw some true pictures. 00:18:31.920 --> 00:18:32.720 Just like this. 00:18:33.440 --> 00:18:34.799 I'll show you this. 00:18:35.440 --> 00:18:36.480 You know what that is? 00:18:36.720 --> 00:18:38.720 One day I started hearing voices. 00:18:39.039 --> 00:18:40.240 Voices became messages. 00:18:40.319 --> 00:18:41.119 He was right here. 00:18:41.279 --> 00:18:44.400 All I could see were these two red eyes. 00:18:44.640 --> 00:18:45.519 I met him. 00:18:46.240 --> 00:18:47.039 You met him. 00:18:47.279 --> 00:18:49.119 He said, do not be afraid. 00:18:53.599 --> 00:18:56.000 All 99 are believed dead. 00:18:57.759 --> 00:18:59.920 You're ready in my mind, I voices my hand. 00:19:04.559 --> 00:19:07.200 This isn't just a message, it's a prediction. 00:19:14.960 --> 00:19:16.880 Earthquakes are going to happen. 00:19:17.200 --> 00:19:22.079 People you know and love are going to die, no matter what that voice tells you. 00:19:24.480 --> 00:19:26.319 There's nothing you can do about it. 00:19:29.599 --> 00:19:30.880 I can stop this.