บทถอดความฉบับเต็มของ Goomba Wars

and one of them, you know, so your friend Kim Miller right. Uh. I first, I just got the military. 00:05:58 Speaker 2: Bo. 00:05:59 Speaker 1: I'm terrified because I was like, I can't find a job, and you know, this is doing those like what monster dot com was just really getting big. And I actually found a job. It was like sales. It was down the street from the house. So I go there and it's one of those you going door to door business the business seller like coupons and and all this. And dude, just when I knew I was only there one day. We go to this place and we're trying to say these qpons to this lady and she says, what what what did you do before this? I said I was in the military. And she's like this what you're doing now? And do my whole heart just because she was needing me like yo. 00:06:42 Speaker 2: You served. 00:06:46 Speaker 1: Like yo, like you served our country y'all. Like she didn't know about the White House stuff. She just looked at me. I was like, Yo, you're going business the business selling cupon no lie bro. I had rolled there with a guy. I was at a store and I called my wife and I said, hey, come pick me up. I was at I was at a a what's that foot action? I said, come pick me up? And then after that, like two weeks later, I got the next tail job. But then I had another dude who I worked with. He was military intelligence. He was in I and Dude and I was doing the comedy show. I can't remember. I think I might have been Dallas and we're you know, we were Facebook friends. We're not anymore. And smart dude working military intelligence. You know, most of my friends I know, M I got out, they got corporate job gs jobs, bro. He came to the show No Front two like he was just bad off, like you know what I mean, I'm just like yo, you like, was like super smart, you know what I mean, Like like you like you know what I mean? Like so yeah, man, And you just never know military like what what that person would do because I didn't know he had went to Bosnia. I didn't know he had toured, you know, like he had through some stuff. Man. But when we were stationed to Watchuka, you know, we were we were a field unit, but we wasn't in the field like that. We weren't going to World War like that. Well at least my unit wasn't. M I wasn't so for him to get stationed because you know, you think you're going, m I you're not thinking you're going to the war. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're going to airbase. So yeah, I've seen it, man, people who you were like. But then I've also seen people who were like terrible in the military and they they end up being sergeant majors. I got a homeboy shout out to my dog man. He was like, he got another tell he was first sergeant. Bro got demoted twice. He got demoted twice. I was just like that, you were first. You was a first sergeant. He said, yeah, yeah, he was like I was. I was a first sergeant. I was a first specialist, and then the second specialist and then the third specialist and then we figured it out. 00:08:57 Speaker 2: We figured it out. 00:08:58 Speaker 1: Bro. You just with the military man, you know, and your pops will tell you this because you know, you've told me a story about Pops. It's your leadership, you know. If you find like when in Wachuka, a lot of those guys that was in certain units, they had sergeants who were also dogs. They also were like fighters. They also they going in the club. We everybody here getting beat up. So if your sergeant is that way, you gonna be that way. If your first sergeant, is that way, you're gonna be that way. I had sergeants who are about, hey, man, look you was late today. We don't do that here, whit you got facial hair? You know why your boots ain't shine. Hey, we're gonna teach you this. We're gonna like And so I felt like maybe he got to a unit with somebody who straightened him out, because when I found out he was a first sergeant, I was like, who promoted you? Because I remember when you got demoted twice. I remember you were the specialists to eat three, to eat two. You were supposed to get kicked out the military. So I'm always shocked, man, because you just never know how something. And you can ask your father. He's probably seeing it to where and you've probably been around it were you probably seeing the model sold you end up not being much and you probably see the soldier who was just terrible and like, dang, bro here, e's seven. 00:10:13 Speaker 2: What I I bet some people run into Chris Alexander. 00:10:17 Speaker 3: Sometimes they're like Alexander from the from from the laundry room. 00:10:21 Speaker 2: You selling video games? Now, okay, that's a come up for you kid. 00:10:27 Speaker 1: They probably like, you know the nickname Ajax. They're like Ajax doing comedy, but he didn't even funny, you know what I mean. 00:10:35 Speaker 3: Like, yeah, they're like, so Ajax, you got funny now. 00:10:38 Speaker 1: Oh no, no, no, no, no, no, I'm doing it. 00:10:42 Speaker 2: I'm just doing it, yeah. 00:10:46 Speaker 1: Chris Man. But it's all about you. It's always about your leadership. Man. You never know. You know, you get a good non commissioned officer, who, by the way, if you know the military is the most important thing in the United States. Military is a good non commissioned office. You get a good nock mission officer, their shape of bad soldier. Bro. I know so many stories. I mean, I was one of them. 00:11:08 Speaker 2: Man. 00:11:08 Speaker 1: I came to DC from a field unit. I was a young warhog. I ain't know nothing about life. I came from a feel unit where they took care of you. I stayed in the embarrass I ain't know nothing about the apartment. I ain't know how the apartment hunt. I ain't know about traffic. I ain't know about driving twenty five miles into DC. I was talking slang, I was I was cussing out. He was like, hey, man, you work in the White House. Now you can't you can't come here. Talking like goodie mob yo, you gotta get your together. 00:11:40 Speaker 3: You You see

that in comedy too. You see dudes that you first remember from open mics who were terrible and didn't care and didn't appreciate it, and then you run into them. They moved away, they went to another scene or something, and you run into them and you look, and this dude's good now, and you know it's because somebody helped them. 00:12:03 Speaker 1: Yeah, and they took the advice. You know what I'm saying. It wasn't about you know, man, especially like say, for instance, you you meet a comic and you thirty, and the comic starts he forty five years old. Yeah, Like a lot of time they're like, no, they if you listen to us, we're gonna get you where you want to be. And that was a that was That's pretty much the same anywhere you go, any job, any million, not just the military, just any job. You come in there and you want to be taught, we'll teach you. Now. If you come in there and you know everything, Hey, hey good luck, man. 00:12:38 Speaker 2: I bet you. 00:12:38 Speaker 3: There's like one really good middle management at the Porno theater and he's like he's telling them, He's like now you got Scotch guard the seats. 00:12:46 Speaker 2: Trust me in this unit. We don't let those seats exorb me. Okay. 00:12:51 Speaker 1: And it's a young dude like, no, man, you ain't got to do that. Oh ge, man, just come in here. Hey, I know we gotta godmit it. Hey, I ain't go see the person They is a friend of out. He work at this store and he sell games, and he was he was telling me about some new young dude that work with him, and there's like, don't listen to nothing, like a man, that dude, do whatever you want to do. I said, well he'll be gone and he'll be the manager. 00:13:16 Speaker 3: So yeah, man, watch that dude's gonna end up being the district manager. 00:13:20 Speaker 1: Oh he's oh my good hey, and that us that happens to it be a terrible I've seen terrible soldiers. You're like, how do heat? Because they either know the game, you know what I'm saying, know how to work the system, or they got an MS where the points systems ain't too high. Well, you know, you may cut off whatts. 00:13:41 Speaker 3: A lot of people, a lot of people who suck, who get moved up, do the things the managers like, not what the operation needs. Yeah, you're like, no, he he comes to all the volunteer events. 00:13:52 Speaker 2: He's at every uh every one of our charity events. 00:13:55 Speaker 3: I'm like cool man, he's not here at work a lot. I'm the one clean in these chairs at the Porno Theater. Yeah, yea to clean them. They got loquer on them. They don't have a lacker. 00:14:09 Speaker 1: Hey and when I'm gonna get red burst with this Scotch guard, I'll just spend one hundred and twenty Scotch guard. 00:14:14 Speaker 2: That seeks pregnant. 00:14:17 Speaker 1: Hey man, Hey man, appreciate y'all man for tutored in the night. Man. We gotta take k commercial break, remember guys, slip and file car accident. Our official sponsor sponsor Jeff Kaufman, Www dot when youneed us dot com. We gonna take a quick commercial break. We'll be right back. Real Last Real Radio one O four point. 00:14:34 Speaker 5: One Curtis Bateman and the Majestic Life Church present The Family Reunion Comedy Show going down on June twenty seven. 00:14:53 Speaker 1: Comedian Curtis Bateman, comedian. 00:14:55 Speaker 4: Tanya Lewis, and Chicken George will be in the building bringing the funny act. Now get them early bird tickets for only nineteen ninety nine, because tickets will go up at the door again June twenty seventh, when it's going down doors open at five thirty, showtime at six fifteen. Get your tickets right now at straight Foolishness dot com. That's str number eight Foolishness dot Com. Come on out and let them put some comedy in your life. 00:15:33 Speaker 1: We're back real last. We're ready a one or four point one your night capa comedy kem Miller and the Big Chesther night guys, do me a favor, go out there and follow us. Man. We're trying to hit three hundred subscribers on YouTube. While YouTube is up to date, I've been putting shorts out there so you can see little crips of the show. Also, make sure you go to Instagram and Facebook, give us a follow, and if you miss any of our shows, all you gotta do download the iharp app put real laughs and you can listen to all of our show us for the past eight, nine ten years that we have been We truly appreciate everybody who's tuned in, who showed the love, who comes to the show, and just know our little catch phrases. We appreciate it. James is out on the boat, Jeff Coffin. We was hoping was gonna join us a night, but he's not. But if you got a slip, a fall, car accident, www dot When you need us DOT, call four O seven five hundred. Jeff. Jeff Kaufman from the Kaufman and Lynn Studios joined the Firsu Studio with Miguil Colole Junr. Butause, I wanted to go back to something because I really want to talk to you about this because I know you've been to Austin, Texas and you've seen the rise of a lot of our young comics. We just finished watching the Cam Patterson interview. Shout out to Cam Patterson. Cam was on Club Shashay. Just a likable kid, Yeah, just a like like in the comments, people are like, I don't know this dude. He's just a likable kid. Like they loved him. But you said something that made me want to go back to this. You were talking about how comedians come in and they're not saying Cam wasn't funny. They're just not paid attention to me. He talked about this in the clip. He said he was nineteen years old. He's tried stand up and nobody would give him any advice, nobody would talk to him, nobody would would do nothing. And I'm only going to assume it was at the other bar. And he was like, but yeah, but then you know, three four years later, the guys that I want, that I looked up to, that I wanted to help me, not open for me, which was Jolly and Jari, and I thought that was a testament to that young man because most people would have been ready to fight or getting ready to talk

jump and being like, I can't stand to see I can't and he wasn't. He was like, man, look they saw they didn't see anything getting me, and they knew I wasn't ready, so why waste my time? Yeah? And then I came back and I'm funny and they're like, okay, now we got something to work with. 00:17:52 Speaker 2: Yeah, that's what's up. 00:17:54 Speaker 3: In fact, I went to the Playboy CARDI show. 00:17:58 Speaker 2: Cam was with us, shout out to her blasters Matt. 00:18:00 Speaker 3: He took us all out and we were in their box and Cam asked me, this was in December. We were hanging out and Camp said, I got a question. He since I got a question, I ask everybody. He has me straight up. He said, when you first met me, did you believe that I could be a star? And I told him, straight up, I have never called anyone in this game that I've worked with as a star, because everybody I meet in this game that's from Florida. I could find you funny, I could do this, but I'm just gonna tell you the truth. And if any comics listening, I am so focused on what I'm trying to do. I know your funny. I know who's funny. I know who's real funny. But when it comes to who's gonna blow up, I'm saving the dreams for me. 00:18:47 Speaker 1: Yeah. 00:18:47 Speaker 2: And it's and I don't mean that a negative way. 00:18:49 Speaker 3: I just mean I'm never sitting around dreaming of oh Man, like you know Preacher. It wasn't until Preacher was on America's Got Talent, and I'm like, okay he got it, cam bertrand I'm like, okay, he got it, cam Patterson, Okay, he got it. And that doesn't mean I didn't believe in them. It means I didn't care about their stardom. I'm just trying to make my heads. And he was like real talk. He was like He's like Hey, I feel it. Charlie says this all the time when they ask him about other comics in their careers. He says, I got blinders on. I'm trying to win my race. You know, I'm trying to win my race. But I've never I talked to people all the time who tell me how they knew somebody was gonna be a star. 00:19:24 Speaker 2: They knew. Listen, I knew Preacher was real good, and I love working with them. 00:19:29 Speaker 3: But I'm not sitting here gonna lie to anybody like I knew from the beginning he'd be a star. No, man, I was. I was still dreaming of getting out of bars. My dreams weren't there yet. I wasn't looking and I definitely wasn't gonna dream about anyone else's stardom. 00:19:45 Speaker 2: And I don't mean that a negative. 00:19:47 Speaker 3: I just mean when it comes to dreaming about who's gonna make it, I know who I. 00:19:52 Speaker 2: Want to work with, and I know who's hilarious. 00:19:54 Speaker 1: Uh. 00:19:55 Speaker 3: You know, I would have never said, I told Mark Gagnon, Mark Gagnaw, man. I told Mark Gagnaw, I think this last year, when I was kicking with him, I said, bro, I never expected when I would see him at open mics with Joey Balzac and they had the gaget on Ballzac open mic tour. I never was like, man, one day that kid, that kid's gonna be on one of the biggest podcasts in the world. 00:20:16 Speaker 2: Nah, man, I just knew who was good and who I wanted to work with. 00:20:20 Speaker 3: But I do think if you are out there trying to call who's gonna be a star and not, you wasting a lot of energy. Just if somebody's funny, give them their props for being funny, because we all know dudes who are funny that never became stars and they'll bury some people. 00:20:39 Speaker 2: Yeah, and I'm sure somebody knows ladies. 00:20:42 Speaker 1: Got a gang of them here. Yeah, we got a gangle. We got a gangle comics here that when I'm telling y'all that headliners come to this city and be like, nah, we're good. 00:20:52 Speaker 3: Yeah, bro, this is like this is like this is like featherweight boxers in Mexico City. 00:21:00 Speaker 2: There's a featherweight. 00:21:01 Speaker 3: There's a seventeen year old featherweight in Mexico City that no pro wants to go toe to toe with. 00:21:07 Speaker 2: They're like, nah, man, he'd be fighting coles. 00:21:10 Speaker 1: Yeah, he got nothing to meet, hanging like Rocky hold on, Yeah, he on the he on the he on the he on the Barnker's boxing circuit. I don't want no, man, Yeah, I want none of that. Hey, it's funny because I'm the opposite of what you said. I'd be like, you're gonna be a star. I'd be like, but I'm also that optimistic pature on the back, brother, Like you know what I'm saying. I told a preacher, I said, bro, you need to go. You are going to be a star. Kid. When Cam when Cam Patterson buried everybody that night at the Funny Bone, Now this was John D. C Curry. I said, man, when he buried the feature and the feature was right there, and Jakobe was like, yo, you bodied the feature and the features were standing right next to I was like, bro, you need to go. Sometimes you just see it, man. I mean, I didn't know Mark gag and I was gonna get the way he is. But I always thought he was a funny kid, always funny kid. I always thought it was just a super funny kid, preacher. You know. I always always thought I keep telling this kid this. I keep thinking Jari should leave Jerry Wright is one of the funniest human beings I've ever been around. 00:22:28 Speaker 2: I've teld him, walk away from your family, jar yo yo for you. They'll appreciate that you had to take care of yourself. 00:22:36 Speaker 1: Hey, because if not hey, And I'm not saying it's a bad thing, but a lot of times you'll look up and you'll be twenty years in yeah, and you'll be in that city and that baby be graduate high school. 00:22:49 Speaker 2: I'm like, Jarry, your kid will still look up to you. 00:22:51 Speaker 3: If you're a celebrity, your wife will hate you, yeah, but the kid will still be like, Hey, I told you the dad who walked out on me, that's Jari right, look at him now. 00:23:00 Speaker 1: Yeah, it's it's it's it's a lot of cats that I've seen, But it's also some cats that I'm like, man, I don't know what happened, you know what I mean, Like it's

everybody. I was just telling somebody the story of the day. I still think the funniest human being to touch a microphone is Eric Myers, and I will I will fight that till the end of days. But he had some demons, you know what I mean, Like we knew Eric Myers went out to l A and was signing the comedy store wall in two weeks. Yeah, like like like like we we we see we we are there, y'all. We are at these shows, we are at these mics. We see you, we see the greatness. You know what I'm saying, Like my blind is all on, I'm looking for who coat tails. I'm a ride. 00:23:48 Speaker 2: I told you hey one time. 00:23:49 Speaker 3: At one time, me and Eric we were at I think we were in Seabring and we were doing. 00:23:53 Speaker 2: The show and that's when he was like hey. 00:23:56 Speaker 3: He was like, He's like, I don't know if I'm because he couldn't do he couldn't stay at Marriots. 00:24:01 Speaker 2: And he was like, I don't. 00:24:03 Speaker 3: Know if there's like a database system for Marriott, but I'm not supposed to stay at them. And so he was like, can we put the room in your name? And I was like yeah. So we walk up together and I walked up and the dude from up the counter looks up and he's like. 00:24:20 Speaker 2: Eric, you know you're not allowed back in this hotels. I've been here. I've been here. Dog. 00:24:33 Speaker 1: How much of an alcoholic you gotta be when you been from a whole chain whole chain. 00:24:39 Speaker 3: Man. 00:24:39 Speaker 2: He was like, you know, I'm not allowed at Marriott's. Like, no, I do. 00:24:45 Speaker 1: But I've ever heard somebody bear from a chain of hotels. 00:24:52 Speaker 3: And who knows if they told Eric you can't stay at this Marriotte. And he was so lit when he heard it. He heard, you can't stay at me. But the funniest part was this was not the Marriotte in question. This was a Marriott he thought he had never stayed at. And so he was like, I don't know if there's a database or a system, go ahead and you just check into the room. 00:25:13 Speaker 2: I was like, got you, And that dude looked up Eric. Man, you know you can't stay here? 00:25:19 Speaker 1: Hilarus. Bro, Oh my goodness, Yeah, Oh my goodness, Bro, that that's hilarious. 00:25:29 Speaker 2: Man. 00:25:29 Speaker 1: But well, we see the talent, you know. I don't know if any comedians listen to that. We do. We see the talent, and I'm rooting for y'all, man, I really am. Now I'm not out there like that no more. You know what I'm saying. I go about what people tell me, like, oh so and so it's funny check out so and so I'm just not out there anymore. I used to run a mic. I got to see everybody, man. But now I don't run a mic anymore, don't. I don't get to see stand up like that. So when people are like, you gotta see some and so I'm like, just tell them to send me a video because I'm not going to a mic on no Tuesday night. Bro. I got a whole ass job. 00:26:06 Speaker 3: I've been making it a point now to go to Alex's Underground Comedy. Shout

out to Alex Barbosa Alex's Underground Comedy on Orange Avenue. 00:26:13 Speaker 2: This isn't a plug because they pay this. 00:26:15 Speaker 3: This is just, honestly, guy, Guys, support new clubs and new venues if you are a fan of comedy, because this is the kind of venue where you can touch the comic. What I mean is, like you right there. It's forty fifty seats. It's forty fifty seats, and they're trying to bring in comics. They're trying to bring headliners from all over. 00:26:33 Speaker 2: And I've been going down the road from my house. 00:26:34 Speaker 3: It's kind of been fun again, Ken, It's kind of been fun because I'm hopping in on shows where none of these comics know me, and I'm coming in and they're like, oh, you're my host, and. 00:26:43 Speaker 2: I'm like yeah, and then I'm coming in. I'm coming in raw, I'm. 00:26:48 Speaker 3: Coming in like it's one of those movies and I'm the old guy punching at the bag and people are like, oh, you want to take our boxing glass. They don't really know I've been in prison for thirty five years, you know. 00:26:58 Speaker 1: Just it's cool. 00:27:00 Speaker 2: I've been going to milk too, man, I've been going to milk. Man, Milk is dope, bro. 00:27:04 Speaker 1: If you have milk has always been great. I like milk. Milk has always been great. But it's just I'm on the road so much that I'm like, man, I'm exhausted. Like I'm neither tire because I gotta work. I'm tied on the road, which is a good tire. You know what I'm saying. I could be sick and tired and not be not working at all. Yeah. 00:27:27 Speaker 3: When I used to be on the road with Devin and we would be in like these Midwest towns, we would drive by and we'd see like one hundred dollars open mic challenge out a pizzeria plus free pizza, and I just look at it, be like try to get. 00:27:41 Speaker 2: Some free pizza. We'll roll up in there right now. 00:27:44 Speaker 3: I would tell them too, Let's let's both walk in on two different doors, like we don't know each other, like like two pool hustlers. Like I guess we could play a two man And you said, David Devin, nice to meet you. 00:27:55 Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't care. Let's see what something. I pull my own stick out, my on microphone out. Yeah, let's do this. 00:28:01 Speaker 1: Lucy got Lucilla, break out Lucille Yo. Which, by the way, every every ninety sitcom had a pool hustling episode. 00:28:11 Speaker 2: It was a common problem that we were worried about. 00:28:13 Speaker 3: It's like quick sanding cartoons and everybody was worried about quick saying getting them when they were little kid, and by the time they were fourteen, they were like, hey, whatever you do, don't bet against a man whose first name is a city in a pool hall. 00:28:24 Speaker 2: Yeah, like, hey, how you doing. My name is Kevin Ain't nice to meet you, Cincinnati. 00:28:31 Speaker 1: If it wasn't, if it wasn't the pool hustler, they all had a d m V episode. 00:28:37 Speaker 2: They got fake, the d ones too, fake.

00:28:39 Speaker 1: Got d They all all of them had something with gangs. 00:28:43 Speaker 2: Yeah, oh, the gags were fruity too, man. 00:28:46 Speaker 3: The gangs were fruity because they couldn't use real gang colors, so the gangs had like green bandanas on, like we're the Vipers and they're like. 00:28:53 Speaker 2: Around here, we don't play around. It's like cool man, I worked for rafer m and uh, we're moving up. We're moving about half a million a week Vipers. Uh. There was like the game that beat up what's his name? 00:29:11 Speaker 1: Yeah, yo. They said they getting sleeves off Eddie Winslow, which is crazy because like a couple of seasons later, Laura got beat up. 00:29:19 Speaker 3: By What's even crazier is Eddie Winslow was jacked. Eddie Winslow would tear you up. He was like a baby Luke Cage. 00:29:31 Speaker 1: Oh. Man, but we gotta run, man, we gotta take a commercial break. Man, right, we'll be right back. Not forget our fishal sponsor Jeff calling from Law was a calling under old podcast. But we gotta take a commercial break. We'd be right back. We're all last. We're Radio one oh four point one. We're back. We're last. We're a radio one or four point one. You're not cap of comedy. Ken Miller and the Big ched to Night. Hey, guys, like I said, do us a favor. Go out there like follow and subscribe. Go to our YouTube channel, give us some views, give us some follows on that man, we're trying to hit three hundred by the end of the year. I'm also all our videos are up and also some shorts. Go out there on the Instagram and Facebook. Give us a follow. We would appreciate that. And drop us a message. Man. We will reply back to you and we love giving shout outs here on the radio. Also, if you miss any of our shows, do me a favor. Download the iHeart app. All you got to do download the iHeart app type in real laughs, and all of our shows from the last eight or nine years are up there. James is out on the boat. Shout out to James. Jeff Coffman. We was hoping gonna join us to night, but he is not here. But we gotta give a shout out to our official sponsor, Jeff Coaufman from the law office of Kafflin Land and the under Oh Podcast. Join the Veru Studio with my comedy brother, Miss Miguel Colone Jr. Now Miguel is one of the smartest people I know. Miguel no history again, No, all kinds of crazy facts that you ain't know nothing about. So I gotta ask you this because I don't understand this. Some the world is saying that US Iran, that we lost this war and we got a bad deal with this deal with US Iran. What do you know about this US Iran deal? Now, y'all know, we don't do politics on this show, so our commentary might be some bs. 00:31:27 Speaker 3: All I know is, at the time of this recording, I don't believe all the details of the deal have been laid out or have been fully agreed upon. I will say from what I'm hearing from very important people like uh, THEO, Vonne and not But what I'm here, what I'm hearing man is like, Uh, it doesn't seem like much was gained from the deal. And I know some viewers are gonna listeners are gonna be ohlah blah blah, But it doesn't seem like anything too much was gained from the deal, except for a promise from Iran saying that they will no longer work on nuclear weapons. I do think though, we all kind of felt like we took care of that when we when we when we bombed him a while ago and blew up their nuclear weapons facilities. So I would say from my from my opinion and listeners, I understand that going on a record right now. I'm no political analyst. I get the same information you do from TV and the Internet. I would say, what is shook American the American taxpayer's confidence is we haven't seen something come from it that makes us feel like, oh, okay, we really moved forward from there to an extent almost like how we feel about the the you know, g Watt, the Global War on Terror. As g Watt wrapped up, I don't think any of us felt like, okay, we took care of that, you know, And and so I feel like that's that's what's happening right now. Also, to be honest, I think it's guys, this time we got to mix it up. 00:33:01 Speaker 2: We've been beefing in the desert wait a long time. 00:33:05 Speaker 3: First of all, it was it was for our grandpappies and our daddies. 00:33:09 Speaker 2: It was a lot of jungle stuff. 00:33:10 Speaker 3: We had a little Korea in there to mix it up with some cold and some cities. But I'm really I'm be honest, guys, I'm thinking Greece this time. 00:33:19 Speaker 2: Next war. 00:33:20 Speaker 3: Let's go old school, let's go let's go Peloponnesian, Let's go Trojan war. 00:33:23 Speaker 2: Let's go Greece. 00:33:24 Speaker 3: There's a bunch of islands, hot women, good food. 00:33:28 Speaker 2: It would be a wild war. 00:33:29 Speaker 3: Man, So Greece if you listening, baby, if you accept man, let's. 00:33:32 Speaker 2: Do a little Greco war. Shake it up. It to be fair. Greeks are still brown, so it's cool. 00:33:38 Speaker 1: All right, Hey, hey, and we ain't gotta do that. Let's take it off the planet. 00:33:43 Speaker 2: Man. 00:33:44 Speaker 1: Let's go with some ass guardian ass like while we gotta keep why we gotta keep dropping bombs on our planet, Let's go bomb somebody out there. 00:33:51 Speaker 3: Bro, I say we go after the Viltromites, the Kryptonians as guardians wherever Et is from that little bit you know Magic et at t e T's people and they're like they imagine coming to east ET's planet for beef, coming there and just being like, yo, your ship rolls up. 00:34:11 Speaker 2: They're like, look, it's the Hue. 00:34:13 Speaker 3: And then all of a sudden, drones and he's like, what's going on. It's like, yeah, what's up, partner, heard y'all have some oil? You know that's all we're looking for. 00:34:22 Speaker 1: You better not have any type and hey, you better not have any good natural resources on your planet. We coming for that. We come back. 00:34:33 Speaker 3: Alias show up to Earth and uh they're coming and

they're talking to us and they're like, we come from glack Noon seven, a planet of peace and wealth. We come to share our technology with you. And we're like, oh, that's amazing man. They're like yes, They're like you are safe because our machines run off glicknards And we're like, what's that? And they're like this substance, black substance. And I'm like, oil, oh, y'all got that here? 00:35:00 Speaker 2: Change of games they have clicking on? 00:35:03 Speaker 1: Come yeah on out what what what was out from Meil mac no mac floo boil mack, Like y'all heard, y'all got platinum here, baby, I'm trying to get some new teethensis bro. 00:35:17 Speaker 3: Real talk throw this one out there. I remember this lady told me one time. She's like, I want you to go out on me. I said what she goes, eat up cat. 00:35:30 Speaker 1: Yeah. Man, we got too many wars going on on Earth. Man. We got it's way too many planets out there, way too many Solar system. Man, let's take this thing up out here, and. 00:35:39 Speaker 2: This is the thing. 00:35:40 Speaker 1: We are you unite as a planet. If we could get something that everybody need, man, we are you knighte as a planet guard and like quick Tony easy though, man, that planet blew up so easily. 00:35:51 Speaker 2: So easy. They don't even have our son, you know, easy. I tell you this too, man, I go on record. 00:35:57 Speaker 3: Guys, first, Iraq War, I was pumped like everybody. 00:36:01 Speaker 2: I was like, it has to be done. 00:36:03 Speaker 3: But secretly I thought we were all getting like gasoline for a nickel and flying carpets, you know. So I was like, hey, this is yo, We're gonna get some gold and some bootlegs. 00:36:12 Speaker 2: Gas is gonna cost a penny. 00:36:14 Speaker 3: Everybody gets a monkey with a fez like this is gonna this is gonna be a score, yo. 00:36:20 Speaker 1: I'll be real with you. Besides that, straight, I don't even know what we're getting. What what what Iran got? Did we want? 00:36:28 Speaker 3: I don't know, man, I don't know. I don't know what anybody has because I know the countries who have what we want, and we're never like beefing with them. I'm like, yo, Australia got some fire beaches, you know, like, hey, get some crocodile skin shoes. 00:36:44 Speaker 1: Man, man, we man, Let's go, we all go. Well, this is the thing. I think we made Japans smarter because we dropped the bomb on them and they make them all kind of great technology and lead them along the people. 00:36:58 Speaker 2: Twice they get real focused. 00:37:02 Speaker 1: Hey a camera. I ain't seen a broke down camera in twenty five years. 00:37:05 Speaker 4: Bro. 00:37:06 Speaker 2: No, Like the plutonium core keeps it running. 00:37:10 Speaker 3: It's got mister fusion from Back to the Future. 00:37:13 Speaker 1: How did Japanese create an Italian's oh hero? Bro? Yeah, yeah, that's that nuke, baby, Like nuke made him like yo, yeah, baby yo. You know that nuke made him smart? Like yo yo. He jumps around, breaks

big bricks and kicks turtles. Let's do it. These kids love it. 00:37:31 Speaker 2: You've thought about this too. 00:37:33 Speaker 3: Mario the Super Mario game, the first one in the franchise, uh not, you know, not like Super Mario Brothers one. Yeah, I'm talking about Super Mario Brothers, the one with Cooper Troopers and turtles and all that. It starts out with Mario running and the minute he sees the goon by he steps on. Now the crazy thing is if Mario just avoids the goomba, it's all good. 00:37:55 Speaker 2: Mario's bloodthirsty. 00:37:58 Speaker 3: He's going after everything and nothing that everything. 00:38:01 Speaker 2: There's kind of doing this thing. It's like, hey, I'm just jumping around. 00:38:04 Speaker 3: So then the dude in the cloud shows up, throwing like spiky beetles at him because he's like, what are you doing to my friends? 00:38:09 Speaker 2: What are you doing on my friend? 00:38:11 Speaker 1: Hey? If he never crushed the goom but y'all, we wouldn't have all these games. He could have just walked away. 00:38:17 Speaker 2: Yeah. 00:38:19 Speaker 3: Every time he kills the dragon and they're like, oh, thank you, but the princess is another castle. 00:38:23 Speaker 2: So what dragon did I kill? 00:38:25 Speaker 1: Oh? 00:38:25 Speaker 2: That was Ralph. 00:38:26 Speaker 3: He's actually really cool to be fair man. He broke into his house so he was freaking out. That's why he threw axes at you. But uh, he's pretty cool man. He fought in the goomb Awards. He's a veteran. 00:38:39 Speaker 1: You killed the disabled veteran. Yeah you noticed he couldn't jump high? 00:38:46 Speaker 2: No, man, not related though, you know. 00:38:48 Speaker 1: Them needs is bad. So if you, if you, if you big time in the military, man, let's go out here. Let's get some of these planets. Let's go, let's go get some of this glocknard. Man. We we done with all these other kunts. We beat the everybody. It ain't nobody else to beat. Dog. 00:39:03 Speaker 2: Let's go. 00:39:04 Speaker 3: Let's go somewhere hospitable for the next war. Let's do a water planet. Everybody just showing up with their tubes like Avatar planet. 00:39:12 Speaker 2: I get. I'm not even against the humans on avatars. 00:39:15 Speaker 3: So many people are like, I can't believe when you watch that movie, you see the greed of humanity. I'm like, yeah, I want that. Yeah, hell yeah, I want that. Let's get that. Let's get that. 00:39:23 Speaker 2: Have me some blue chicks going around like, what's up? 00:39:25 Speaker 3: Man? 00:39:26 Speaker 2: What's up? Girl? 00:39:28 Speaker 1: Yeah? Man, we gotta take this war out there. Man, I damn, I'm gonna roll it back. Maybe not as guard. They might beat to mass they're. 00:39:37 Speaker 2: Going to they got blown up. 00:39:39 Speaker 1: Yah. Yeah, they planning to blow up easy too. 00:39:42 Speaker 3: And then they came here started new ass guard taking our jobs. Ya, taking our jobs? How door get fat? 00:39:51 Speaker 2: He's a god? 00:39:52 Speaker 1: How many calories? 00:39:53 Speaker 3: Because he doesn't need that many calories to participate in regular life. How many calories did it take for or to get fat? 00:40:02 Speaker 2: Man? 00:40:03 Speaker 1: That's the heartbreak. Bro. Yeah, man, he was heartbroken. That shows man, even even superheroes heartbreak. Bro, he was heartbroken. Dude got belly and everything. 00:40:13 Speaker 2: I was heartbroken when I saw Love and Thunder. 00:40:15 Speaker 1: Oh it was so bad, so bad. 00:40:17 Speaker 2: I would have rather. 00:40:18 Speaker 3: I would have rather watched Booty Clapping seven in the theater with Pey Herman. Hey. 00:40:22 Speaker 1: Man. Of all of them, you think Cap, you think thor you think a man like which Spider Man? Which one of the which franchise that you like the most. Of all of the heroes who had multiple movies. 00:40:39 Speaker 3: I didn't really like the first Captain America movie, but the other two Civil. 00:40:44 Speaker 2: War and. 00:40:46 Speaker 3: Uh what Win Soldiers Winter Soldier are so good to be Civil War Winter Soldier are so good. 00:40:54 Speaker 2: They kind of make up for the first Cap America kind of being lame. 00:40:58 Speaker 3: But to me, the Sony Spider Man series has been just so much fun. Yeah, the tom Al and Sony Spider Man series has been just so much fun, even more fun than the Deadpool series for me, which is cool. But the Spider Man series, I think I think the people making the Spider Man series understand what we like from comic book movies. 00:41:19 Speaker 2: I want action, I want heart, but I want fun. 00:41:23 Speaker 1: You know, I agree with you too. Yeah, I agree with you, especially if anybody, if you have not seen the trailer, the new trailer is oh ridiculous. But that'll probably be my number one. And I'm gonna tell you one. That's my number two. That I knew nothing about Guardians. 00:41:38 Speaker 2: Oh Guardians are You're right? Guardians? Guardians is great? 00:41:41 Speaker 3: Those three And I never read Guardians comics when I was a kid, Like, I ain't know. 00:41:45 Speaker 1: Nothing about Guardians. I do not, And I was like, this is gonna be stupid. And it actually was like really good. One and two was really good. I can't remember three that well is good. I feel like I feel like the last Capital of America to me was a It was an Avenger movie. 00:42:02 Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, it was. 00:42:05 Speaker 1: It. Yeah, Avenger movie. Man. But I'm super excited. I'm more excited about the next Spider Man than I am. These these Dooms, they Avengers and all that. 00:42:14 Speaker 3: I'm so caring and I love Doctor Doom, but I'm so tired of kind of like this catastrophic. The thing I like about the Spider Man movies is it's a localized problem. Yeah, and and and that that's so even even the last one where it was like all about the multiverse. 00:42:30 Speaker 2: That was cool, But I like the idea I sometimes I need. 00:42:33 Speaker 3: I don't need aliens taking over Earth. I need some problems going on in like the South Side of Queens. 00:42:39 Speaker 1: That's what I'm saying. All these other aliens come to our planet and the stars that we don't never go starting nothing nowhere else showed me somebody that came here from another planet trying to kill us? 00:42:50 Speaker 3: Bro, what if we showed up to the Scroll planet and we were just wearing scroll masks like you get one hundred percent tell we aren't. 00:42:57 Speaker 2: We're trying to like be like, hey, what's he doing? Like, Nah, it's me clock noon. 00:43:06 Speaker 1: Hey, man, we gotta get up out of here, man. Hey. Shout out to Jeff Coffin from the Law Officer of Calling any unother podcast our official sponsor. Man, make sure you check them out www dot when you need this dot com Fall seven five, honey, Jeff. Shout out to James. John. James is on the boat. He shall be back next week, but get where you at this weekend, my brother. 00:43:25 Speaker 3: This weekend, I am home, Brother, I am home. I'm chilling. I don't head out until July, and I got a bunch of July dates that we're gonna release soon. 00:43:32 Speaker 2: I just gotta wait for Jolly to give me the word on them. 00:43:35 Speaker 1: Nice, nice, Well check me out y'all this Thursday. It is Clean Comedy Night. That'll be June twenty fifth. Thursday, June twenty fifth, seven pm to nine pm. It's gonna be a rocking rep and Oh Kobe. That's eighty nine sixty nine West Colonial Driver Kobe Florida, hosted by Uncle Dave. Shaalo will be an opener, I will be featured, and Jake Clark will be headlining. You can use a discount cod can and get tickets for twelve dollars and fifty cents. That's ten dollars off the regular price. Clean Comedy Night. It's all clean. You come check me out. I ain't cussing nothing, man, Come check it out. Rock and rap, Oh Kobe this Thursday, seventh p m. Man, we gotta get up out of here. 00:44:16 Speaker 2: Man. 00:44:16 Speaker 1: We in overtime. Man. We appreciate y'all for tuning in. Man. See y'all tomorrow night. I'm Kim Miller. That is Miguel Colonne Junior, Miguil Do me a favor, and tell these fools what to do. Good Night,