Fullständig transkription av S7 EP28: Tom Skinner

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WEBVTT 1 00:00:02.980 --> 00:00:07.000 Hello I'm Rob Beckett and I'm Josh Willicombe. Welcome to Parenting. 2 00:00:06.599 --> 00:00:08.779 Hell the show in which Josh and I discuss what 3 00:00:08.820 --> 00:00:11.380 it's really like to be a parent which I would 4 00:00:11.419 --> 00:00:12.500 say can be a little tricky. 5 00:00:12.740 --> 00:00:15.539 So to make ourselves and hopefully you feel better about 6 00:00:15.560 --> 00:00:18.660 the trials and tribulations of modern day parenting each week 7 00:00:19.019 --> 00:00:21.170 we'll be chatting to a famous parent about how they're. 8 00:00:21.050 --> 00:00:23.589 Coping or hopefully how they're not coping. 9 00:00:23.510 --> 00:00:25.149 And we'll also be hearing from you the listener with 10 00:00:25.170 --> 00:00:28.750 your tips advice and of course tales of parenting. 11 00:00:28.350 --> 00:00:31.070 Woe because let's be honest there are plenty of times 12 00:00:31.109 --> 00:00:37.619 where none of us know what we're doing Hello, you're 13 00:00:37.640 --> 00:00:39.399 listening to Parents in Hell with. 14 00:00:39.420 --> 00:00:43.579 Can you say Rob Beckett? Rob Beckett. Can you say 15 00:00:43.719 --> 00:00:46.579 Josh Widdicombe? Josh Beckett. 16 00:00:48.500 --> 00:00:49.060 Well done. 17 00:00:49.659 --> 00:00:52.570 I like that, Josh. Very happy, very cute. 18 00:00:53.130 --> 00:00:55.310 One of the daughters, obviously, is the happiest time. Summer, 19 00:00:55.490 --> 00:00:59.009 aged 28 months. Is it the happiest time? And Harper, 20 00:00:59.070 --> 00:01:02.390 nine months, introducing the show. Mum Amy is originally from Warrington, 21 00:01:02.409 --> 00:01:06.810 but we now all reside in Dad James' hometown of Maidenhead. 22 00:01:07.670 --> 00:01:10.250 Maidenhead has a tour venue, I'm sure. 23 00:01:10.329 --> 00:01:11.329 Yeah, and Warrington. 24 00:01:11.549 --> 00:01:15.280 Sure you've done Maidenhead, Northern Farm in Maidenhead back in 25 00:01:15.319 --> 00:01:17.680 the day, Rob. Our kids are just 18 months apart 26 00:01:17.719 --> 00:01:19.799 and it's been hard work and we're so looking forward 27 00:01:19.819 --> 00:01:22.040 to the golden age when we can enjoy our holidays 28 00:01:22.099 --> 00:01:24.260 again when they are six, as Rob always says. 29 00:01:24.579 --> 00:01:27.239 No, four. I've just took two years off of that. Josh, 30 00:01:27.280 --> 00:01:29.519 it's four. I think from four. 31 00:01:29.640 --> 00:01:31.469 Is when holidays you enjoy them and get a bit 32 00:01:31.489 --> 00:01:33.269 of rest and it's not such much graft. 33 00:01:33.329 --> 00:01:35.170 So it's not six. Don't panic. 34 00:01:35.799 --> 00:01:38.340 You're not far off. Thanks for the laughs and relatability. 35 00:01:38.359 --> 00:01:40.689 You once got us through a road trip to Switzerland 36 00:01:41.290 --> 00:01:44.790 when our oldest was four months old. What a mistake 37 00:01:44.810 --> 00:01:45.250 that was. 38 00:01:45.269 --> 00:01:46.730 That would have been COVID. 39 00:01:46.750 --> 00:01:49.209 Yeah, that is brutal, isn't it? Do you like summer, Rob? 40 00:01:49.510 --> 00:01:50.659 Rank the seasons, please. 41 00:01:51.219 --> 00:01:53.680 For me, spring. Top one. Right in there. Right up 42 00:01:53.700 --> 00:01:54.099 your arse. 43 00:01:54.159 --> 00:01:56.579 Spring and autumn are my favourite because they're the transitional ones. 44 00:01:57.079 --> 00:01:58.260 They're full of excitement. 45 00:01:58.420 --> 00:02:01.659 Yes. It goes, for me, spring, autumn, summer, winter. 46 00:02:02.170 --> 00:02:06.150 So for me, it goes autumn, spring, winter, summer. 47 00:02:06.879 --> 00:02:07.640 Really? 48 00:02:07.829 --> 00:02:11.060 Winter over summer? No, because of Christmas. 49 00:02:11.539 --> 00:02:14.659 I love Christmas, Rob. Autumn's the best because the nights 50 00:02:14.719 --> 00:02:18.219 are drawing in and then Christmas is coming. Wait, sorry, 51 00:02:18.240 --> 00:02:20.650 are we watching Strictly? Christmas must be coming. 52 00:02:21.250 --> 00:02:25.210 Oh, I'm a celebrity. Get magic Christmas on. Here we go. 53 00:02:25.370 --> 00:02:26.550 Lovely. You know what? 54 00:02:26.669 --> 00:02:29.250 I think you might have maybe switched summer and winter around. 55 00:02:30.210 --> 00:02:31.710 Josh, are you all right? 56 00:02:32.560 --> 00:02:35.800 Yeah, Rose has just spoken to some BT engineers in 57 00:02:35.840 --> 00:02:38.409 the street and they've said it's their fault the internet 58 00:02:38.449 --> 00:02:39.710 is down and they're sorting it. 59 00:02:40.449 --> 00:02:44.110 Oh, okay, yes. You've had issues for a week now. Luckily, 60 00:02:44.150 --> 00:02:44.990 they're getting sorted, Josh. 61 00:02:45.370 --> 00:02:47.599 Exactly. Have I won you round to autumn then? 62 00:02:47.969 --> 00:02:52.090 No, actually, no, you haven't. Because winter isn't I'm a 63 00:02:52.129 --> 00:02:56.250 celebrity in Christmas. That's autumn still. Winter's January. 64 00:02:56.669 --> 00:02:57.090 Do you know what? 65 00:02:57.110 --> 00:03:00.069 There's something about January I do like, Rob, which is 66 00:03:00.509 --> 00:03:03.569 I like that feeling of, oh, God, I'm going to 67 00:03:03.590 --> 00:03:05.710 eat a vegetable and I'm going to go to the 68 00:03:05.770 --> 00:03:08.650 gym and I'm going to. start that project that i 69 00:03:08.689 --> 00:03:12.180 wanted like i like the feeling of renewal in january 70 00:03:12.199 --> 00:03:15.000 i hate that i hate i hate that i hate 71 00:03:15.060 --> 00:03:18.960 that the most i hate new year's resolutions little. 72 00:03:18.599 --> 00:03:21.689 Rats like you oh from the first tell you what 73 00:03:21.710 --> 00:03:24.090 give your own ass a slap and do it now 74 00:03:24.409 --> 00:03:27.610 it's november fucking crack on with it do that project 75 00:03:27.650 --> 00:03:30.250 now what's the number if you have to wait till 76 00:03:30.289 --> 00:03:32.449 then it'll never get done if you really want to 77

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00:03:32.490 --> 00:03:35.379 do it you start today that's what i say josh Okay. 78 00:03:35.409 --> 00:03:41.460 So winter's fucked off. Winter's gone. It goes spring, autumn, summer, winter, January, bleh. 79 00:03:41.680 --> 00:03:43.439 I think summer's too hot these days. 80 00:03:43.460 --> 00:03:48.020 Yeah, I doubt about that as much. I wouldn't say 81 00:03:48.060 --> 00:03:49.400 the British summer's too hot for me. 82 00:03:49.560 --> 00:03:50.500 It's too hot for me. 83 00:03:50.560 --> 00:03:51.400 Everything's too hot for you. 84 00:03:51.580 --> 00:03:53.789 Even ear covering headphones are too hot for you. 85 00:03:53.810 --> 00:03:54.110 I know. 86 00:03:54.370 --> 00:03:57.330 That's why I've gone winter over summer. I'm not made 87 00:03:57.430 --> 00:04:00.250 for heat. I've never seen you in a big jumper. 88 00:04:00.669 --> 00:04:04.030 You are T-shirt and thin jacket or T-shirt and big coat. 89 00:04:04.289 --> 00:04:05.449 I've never seen you in a jumper. 90 00:04:05.469 --> 00:04:06.990 No, or I'd wear a sweatshirt. 91 00:04:07.110 --> 00:04:09.629 Yeah, even that is a thinner one. I'd never seen 92 00:04:09.650 --> 00:04:11.550 you in a thick knitted jumper like a fisherman. 93 00:04:11.689 --> 00:04:13.110 I cannot wear a knit. 94 00:04:13.150 --> 00:04:13.729 The eczema. 95 00:04:14.889 --> 00:04:15.780 I don't have eczema. 96 00:04:16.939 --> 00:04:27.680 Don't you? You sure? LAUGHTER Oh, asthma. You've got asthma. 97 00:04:27.699 --> 00:04:28.639 That's the one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 98 00:04:28.660 --> 00:04:31.079 I knew I had a ma. I can't wear a knit. 99 00:04:31.459 --> 00:04:34.259 It just makes me too hot. It just makes me 100 00:04:34.740 --> 00:04:35.300 too hot. 101 00:04:35.319 --> 00:04:37.939 We're just a couple of hot-blooded young guys, mate, out 102 00:04:37.959 --> 00:04:38.500 on the prowl. 103 00:04:39.079 --> 00:04:39.339 Yeah. 104 00:04:39.480 --> 00:04:42.259 I can only go clothes shopping in the summer when 105 00:04:42.300 --> 00:04:44.540 I'm wearing a shorts and T-shirt and swimming. 106 00:04:44.740 --> 00:04:46.920 I can't bear it. All the jumpers, all the layers 107 00:04:47.000 --> 00:04:48.810 I get. Oh, it's horrible. Not a fan of it. 108 00:04:48.860 --> 00:04:50.360 Going into a shop in a coat. 109 00:04:50.579 --> 00:04:51.139 Fuck it. 110 00:04:51.160 --> 00:04:56.959 LAUGHTER Going into a shop with a coat. That is 111 00:04:57.000 --> 00:04:59.990 such a simple thing, but it's horrible. Over your arm, 112 00:05:00.000 --> 00:05:01.430 then your forearm's sweaty. 113 00:05:01.910 --> 00:05:02.629 Oh, my God. 114 00:05:03.029 --> 00:05:04.829 Awful, awful stuff. 115 00:05:05.269 --> 00:05:06.850 And then you're carrying stuff, and then all of a 116 00:05:06.889 --> 00:05:09.850 sudden you're dripping with sweat because it's all lot inside, 117 00:05:10.129 --> 00:05:11.490 and you've got your big coat on, but you're trying 118 00:05:11.529 --> 00:05:12.810 to do a shop. Oh, it's horrible. 119 00:05:13.050 --> 00:05:13.790 Oh, fuck that. 120 00:05:13.829 --> 00:05:15.769 I do think the chiller aisles have got colder, though, 121 00:05:15.790 --> 00:05:17.649 in supermarkets since I used to work in them. 122 00:05:17.709 --> 00:05:20.009 Do you? Yeah. I get cold in them now. I 123 00:05:20.050 --> 00:05:20.569 never used to. 124 00:05:20.990 --> 00:05:23.730 When I worked in Safeway, which supermarket did you work in? 125 00:05:24.230 --> 00:05:26.129 I did Sainsbury's and Marks and Spencer. 126 00:05:26.350 --> 00:05:28.379 Oh, slightly more upmarket than Safeway. 127 00:05:28.769 --> 00:05:30.980 Yeah, or just like the greasy pole up to the 128 00:05:31.019 --> 00:05:32.360 top of the old M & S. 129 00:05:32.379 --> 00:05:35.879 Because is this just a Safeway terminology? So they'd have 130 00:05:36.420 --> 00:05:41.329 freezer section, fridge section. Yeah. And then they'd have fruit 131 00:05:41.370 --> 00:05:42.589 and veg, which was like fresh. 132 00:05:42.949 --> 00:05:45.449 And then you could always do the mushroom joke. Not 133 00:05:45.490 --> 00:05:46.870 mushroom for these on the shelf. 134 00:05:47.389 --> 00:05:48.060 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. 135 00:05:48.189 --> 00:05:50.399 I once saw a stand-up do that to very little. 136 00:05:50.680 --> 00:05:51.319 What, in a gear? 137 00:05:51.379 --> 00:05:53.259 That's a dad joke at work. Your dad's do it 138 00:05:53.279 --> 00:05:53.579 at work. 139 00:05:53.680 --> 00:05:56.620 I once saw a stand-up. He brought me on, Rob. 140 00:05:57.120 --> 00:06:02.550 He did 10 minutes of puns about meeting his wife 141 00:06:02.870 --> 00:06:05.050 in the vegetable aisle, which was, I thought, there's not 142 00:06:05.089 --> 00:06:07.509 mushroom here. I don't know what the other ones were. 143 00:06:08.350 --> 00:06:09.879 She was the apple of my eye. 144 00:06:09.980 --> 00:06:11.240 She was the apple of my eye. 145 00:06:11.360 --> 00:06:12.319 Oh, that's a lot nicer. 146 00:06:12.339 --> 00:06:13.060 Yeah, yeah. 147 00:06:13.079 --> 00:06:14.199 She had a lovely pair. Yeah. 148 00:06:14.259 --> 00:06:16.670 Oh, a bit blue. She shoved a courgette up my arse. 149 00:06:16.689 --> 00:06:17.410 Stuff like that. 150 00:06:17.449 --> 00:06:20.110 Exactly. He walked on. You know a compere's meant to 151 00:06:20.129 --> 00:06:22.759 do crowd work. He walked on and walked straight to 152 00:06:22.779 --> 00:06:25.379 the mic. Just did 10 minutes of these puns and 153 00:06:25.389 --> 00:06:27.220 brought me on and I didn't know what to do 154 00:06:27.240 --> 00:06:27.699 with myself. 155 00:06:27.939 --> 00:06:30.180 I got brought on a corporate and it was for 156 00:06:30.240 --> 00:06:32.519 a lot of old geezers that love rugby and there 157 00:06:32.540 --> 00:06:34.240 was a rugby player, a really tall one. 158 00:06:34.899 --> 00:06:38.350 Oh, I followed him. I followed him. He's so good. 159 00:06:38.389 --> 00:06:40.089 He's impossible. The bloke that was in Harry

Potter. He's 160 00:06:40.110 --> 00:06:41.529 impossible to follow. 161 00:06:41.610 --> 00:06:42.829 He's fucking massive. 162 00:06:42.850 --> 00:06:43.709 What's his name? 163 00:06:43.910 --> 00:06:45.310 Is he called Martin Bayfield? 164 00:06:45.689 --> 00:06:48.540 Martin Bayfield. That's it. Big up, Bayfield. Great. 165 00:06:48.560 --> 00:06:51.420 If you want an ex-rugby pro as an after-dinner speaker, 166 00:06:51.459 --> 00:06:51.839 he's great. 167 00:06:52.240 --> 00:06:53.060 I'd say a bit blue. 168 00:06:53.360 --> 00:06:55.800 Does a lot of stuff about cocks in the changing room. 169 00:06:56.079 --> 00:06:56.600 All good stuff. 170 00:06:56.939 --> 00:07:00.990 But he's so big. He's so alpha. Does really sort 171 00:07:01.009 --> 00:07:03.509 of blue stuff and stories from rugby days and he's 172 00:07:03.550 --> 00:07:04.129 quite laddy. 173 00:07:04.449 --> 00:07:04.670 Yeah. 174 00:07:05.050 --> 00:07:07.170 And also he's been on Harry Potter, so he sprinkles down. 175 00:07:07.230 --> 00:07:09.230 He brought me on and I died hard. 176 00:07:09.250 --> 00:07:09.850 I died hard. 177 00:07:09.889 --> 00:07:12.899 He's unfollowable because he shakes your hand. It looks like 178 00:07:12.920 --> 00:07:16.560 he's introduced a child. He's six foot ten. He's a 179 00:07:16.639 --> 00:07:18.220 foot and a half taller than you. 180 00:07:18.660 --> 00:07:18.939 I know. 181 00:07:19.000 --> 00:07:20.139 And he's done all those jokes. 182 00:07:20.620 --> 00:07:21.519 Oh, man, I died. 183 00:07:21.589 --> 00:07:24.129 And do you know what? Darren Goff, the England bowler, 184 00:07:24.149 --> 00:07:25.930 was in the second row and I could see him 185 00:07:26.449 --> 00:07:29.879 willing me on. LAUGHTER desperately hoping it would get better 186 00:07:29.939 --> 00:07:32.240 for me but in reality we both knew where it 187 00:07:32.279 --> 00:07:35.430 was going yeah two people i've died after the worst 188 00:07:35.509 --> 00:07:42.529 at a corporate martin bayfield and william hayes Fucking unfollowable, 189 00:07:42.569 --> 00:07:43.170 William Hague. 190 00:07:43.810 --> 00:07:46.350 Well, that's difficult because it's impossible to follow Bayfield because 191 00:07:46.370 --> 00:07:48.209 you're so different to him. But with William Hague, you're 192 00:07:48.269 --> 00:07:51.769 so similar to him. Again, it's almost impossible to follow 193 00:07:51.790 --> 00:07:52.670 in a different way. 194 00:07:53.329 --> 00:07:56.370 Bayfield. Oh, we should have a Bayfield survivors group. 195 00:07:56.730 --> 00:07:59.329 All the other comedians that have died that thought they 196 00:07:59.350 --> 00:08:01.350 were good at comedy until Bayfield rocks up with his 197 00:08:01.430 --> 00:08:02.029 sports stories. 198 00:08:02.110 --> 00:08:04.209 Oh, my God. And just for the Hague one, Rob. 199 00:08:04.689 --> 00:08:05.199 Yeah, go on. 200 00:08:05.519 --> 00:08:08.800 The audience of the financial industry were far more in 201 00:08:08.839 --> 00:08:10.600 line with his views than they were with mine. 202 00:08:10.740 --> 00:08:12.379 Let's put it that way. I can imagine. 203 00:08:12.420 --> 00:08:15.000 He was an excellent booking for the audience and I 204 00:08:15.040 --> 00:08:17.509 was probably a misbooking. That's the way I'd view it. 205 00:08:17.920 --> 00:08:20.790 I need to find what Martin Bayfield finishes on. I 206 00:08:20.810 --> 00:08:23.189 think it's about another rugby player's penis or something. 207 00:08:23.509 --> 00:08:24.290 It's got to be about. 208 00:08:24.110 --> 00:08:25.750 Will Carling's dick or something, isn't it? 209 00:08:28.540 --> 00:08:30.680 But he's an excellent ad at Bayfield. Yeah, you can see. 210 00:08:30.699 --> 00:08:33.139 There's a little clip of him on Prime Performers. Look, 211 00:08:33.279 --> 00:08:33.919 if you want to book him. 212 00:08:33.940 --> 00:08:34.799 Oh, yeah, I bet he's good. 213 00:08:34.840 --> 00:08:37.360 Anyway, the episode today, we have got Tom Skinner on 214 00:08:37.379 --> 00:08:40.590 the show today. He's from The Apprentice. He's from the internet, 215 00:08:40.830 --> 00:08:44.110 famous for his inspirational speeches from Dino's Caf at 4 a.m. 216 00:08:44.450 --> 00:08:48.149 He's released his new book called Graft, all about his life. 217 00:08:48.250 --> 00:08:51.350 But he's a very interesting character, larger than life, very 218 00:08:51.389 --> 00:08:54.990 funny man. Also, he's got two baby twins and like 219 00:08:55.029 --> 00:08:57.389 a three or four-year-old boy, which we discussed earlier. So 220 00:08:57.429 --> 00:09:00.299 he's up early, he's busy, and we chat about life 221 00:09:00.419 --> 00:09:03.659 and kids. Enjoy our loyal listeners. 222 00:09:03.700 --> 00:09:03.840 What? 223 00:09:03.860 --> 00:09:05.860 We haven't got a name for the Parenting Hell listeners, 224 00:09:05.960 --> 00:09:06.279 have we? 225 00:09:06.860 --> 00:09:09.559 No, we haven't, have we? Like the lids. The lids. 226 00:09:09.600 --> 00:09:12.379 So, yeah, have a word podcast, call their listeners the lid. 227 00:09:12.419 --> 00:09:14.039 The off-menu people, I don't know what they call this, 228 00:09:14.059 --> 00:09:16.799 the hungry bastards. Right, well, send in suggestions of what 229 00:09:16.820 --> 00:09:17.659 we can call our listeners. 230 00:09:17.960 --> 00:09:19.610 You guys. Now, this is Tom Skinner. 231 00:09:19.659 --> 00:09:19.899 Enjoy. 232 00:09:23.159 --> 00:09:25.440 Tom Skinner, welcome to Parenting Health. 233 00:09:25.460 --> 00:09:27.580 Very excited to have you. I'm buzzing to be here. 234 00:09:27.620 --> 00:09:28.240 Thanks for having me. 235 00:09:28.419 --> 00:09:29.100 It's exciting. 236 00:09:29.399 --> 00:09:30.220 Josh, have you met Tom? 237 00:09:30.940 --> 00:09:33.820 No, but obviously I'm a fan from the moment I 238 00:09:33.860 --> 00:09:35.899 saw him and thought, he's like you. 239 00:09:35.919 --> 00:09:39.970 We get a lot of people saying that

we're the same. 240 00:09:40.309 --> 00:09:43.470 You made your name on The Apprentice nationally, locally, for 241 00:09:43.490 --> 00:09:44.250 other means. 242 00:09:44.759 --> 00:09:45.440 It was The Apprentice. 243 00:09:45.539 --> 00:09:47.960 And then, obviously, you got more famous, I think, through 244 00:09:48.000 --> 00:09:48.879 your breakfasts. 245 00:09:49.340 --> 00:09:51.659 Just going Dino's Cat. Talk me through your breakfast, Tom. 246 00:09:51.950 --> 00:09:53.470 Yeah, so talk us through how you got so big 247 00:09:53.509 --> 00:09:55.870 on TikTok, because that sort of pushed you on into 248 00:09:55.909 --> 00:09:57.629 getting a book deal, really, isn't it, as well? 249 00:09:57.990 --> 00:09:59.929 So, basically, like, I knew it was going to be 250 00:10:00.159 --> 00:10:02.639 markets still sell furniture I've got a boxing gym but 251 00:10:03.080 --> 00:10:05.120 we always start work at like three four in the 252 00:10:05.159 --> 00:10:07.659 morning if we're going down the warehouse if we're going 253 00:10:07.679 --> 00:10:10.259 to a market if we're going to load up and 254 00:10:10.279 --> 00:10:13.659 there's a cafe called Dino's Cafe right in the new 255 00:10:13.679 --> 00:10:17.070 Spitalfield market in Leighton in East London and we go 256 00:10:17.110 --> 00:10:18.789 in there with the boys and we get a nice 257 00:10:18.830 --> 00:10:21.600 big bit of breakfast And it just sort of happened 258 00:10:21.639 --> 00:10:24.070 last year. I've always given a little motivational, come on, 259 00:10:24.090 --> 00:10:26.549 let's watch. We're going to go out and give it 260 00:10:26.610 --> 00:10:29.009 under the 10%. We're not messing about. We ain't going 261 00:10:29.049 --> 00:10:30.809 home until we're proud. We're going to earn loads of reddies. 262 00:10:31.529 --> 00:10:32.870 And then my mate was like, we should film this. 263 00:10:32.970 --> 00:10:34.049 And we just filmed it as a laugh. 264 00:10:34.429 --> 00:10:34.990 Stuck it on. 265 00:10:35.870 --> 00:10:38.110 And by the way, we always have like lasagna. 266 00:10:39.289 --> 00:10:42.269 It's not egg and bacon. It's a main meal. 267 00:10:42.429 --> 00:10:44.580 Roast dinners. Roast dinner with a bit of grub. 268 00:10:44.639 --> 00:10:47.240 And we just filmed it, stuck it on the internet 269 00:10:47.259 --> 00:10:49.419 because people might like to listen to this. And I've 270 00:10:49.600 --> 00:10:51.759 done it and it sort of went viral straight away. 271 00:10:52.419 --> 00:10:53.740 And then I thought I'd do it again, and I'd 272 00:10:53.759 --> 00:10:54.899 do it again. Because I'm in there every day, so 273 00:10:54.919 --> 00:10:56.840 it didn't really make no sense to me. Pete was 274 00:10:56.860 --> 00:10:59.039 just like, this guy's just waking up at four o'clock. 275 00:10:59.179 --> 00:11:02.399 He's like spreading positivity and smashing down like 17 roast 276 00:11:02.419 --> 00:11:04.690 potatoes at 4.30 in the morning. 277 00:11:04.870 --> 00:11:05.970 It's inspiring, Tom. 278 00:11:06.309 --> 00:11:08.029 I think that's your charm, though, what sort of one 279 00:11:08.070 --> 00:11:10.529 you so many fans on The Apprentices. Like your book's 280 00:11:10.570 --> 00:11:12.929 called Graft. You work really hard, and you've got a 281 00:11:12.950 --> 00:11:15.309 busy home life now. So you've got three kids. 282 00:11:15.860 --> 00:11:17.740 Three kids, mate. Nightmare. And what ages? 283 00:11:18.450 --> 00:11:22.690 So Henry is coming up to three in November, start 284 00:11:22.710 --> 00:11:25.190 of November, and the twins are four months old. 285 00:11:25.210 --> 00:11:26.870 Oh, my word. 286 00:11:27.090 --> 00:11:27.850 They're twin girls. 287 00:11:27.950 --> 00:11:30.750 What was the moment like when they said at the scan, 288 00:11:31.049 --> 00:11:31.750 this is twins? 289 00:11:32.460 --> 00:11:34.279 Mate, do you know what happened? You couldn't make this up. 290 00:11:34.320 --> 00:11:37.320 So I've got a third sense. I'm not like Mystic Meg, 291 00:11:37.360 --> 00:11:38.740 but I was like, imagine it's twins. 292 00:11:38.860 --> 00:11:41.299 Anyway, going to the hospital. Do you mean a sixth sense? 293 00:11:42.080 --> 00:11:42.779 No, fifth sense. 294 00:11:43.269 --> 00:11:45.710 No, no, you said you've got a third. Most people 295 00:11:45.730 --> 00:11:54.230 have got five. Oh, well, I've only got three. You've 296 00:11:54.250 --> 00:11:56.110 got an extra sense, is what you said. I'm a 297 00:11:56.149 --> 00:11:57.009 couple of senses behind. 298 00:11:57.029 --> 00:12:00.889 And one of them is you can tell the twins 299 00:12:00.970 --> 00:12:01.250 are coming. 300 00:12:01.309 --> 00:12:02.929 That's it. Yeah, I'm saving up for the rest. 301 00:12:03.429 --> 00:12:06.450 So we've gone to the hospital and Sinead is laying 302 00:12:06.470 --> 00:12:08.529 on this big sort of like chair thing and the 303 00:12:08.570 --> 00:12:11.509 nurse has started rubbing jelly into her belly and All 304 00:12:11.529 --> 00:12:13.169 of a sudden, there's a big screen in front of her, 305 00:12:13.190 --> 00:12:16.200 so I can see clear as day there are two 306 00:12:16.269 --> 00:12:17.220 babies on that screen. 307 00:12:17.379 --> 00:12:19.860 I can see it. Oh, my gosh. Tiny little babies. 308 00:12:20.759 --> 00:12:23.200 The nurse goes to my wife and she goes, oh, 309 00:12:23.240 --> 00:12:27.559 my God, we've got one healthy heartbeat and we've got 310 00:12:27.940 --> 00:12:31.460 two healthy heartbeats. And my wife, she named bless her, went, 311 00:12:31.840 --> 00:12:33.679 is it normal for the baby to have two heartbeats? 312 00:12:33.840 --> 00:12:41.649 LAUGHTER I've looked up and I've gone, you what? 313 00:12:41.929 --> 00:12:46.529 We're having twins, babe. 314 00:12:48.129 --> 00:12:50.230 I imagine you've always wanted quite a big family, Tom. 315 00:12:50.669 --> 00:12:52.950 Honestly, it's the best thing that's ever happened. I love

316 00:12:52.970 --> 00:12:54.309 my kids. It's great. 317 00:12:54.350 --> 00:12:56.590 I love getting home from work and little Emery just 318 00:12:56.610 --> 00:12:59.029 showing me his poo in the potty. It's fantastic. 319 00:12:59.049 --> 00:13:03.909 What a welcome home. Yeah. Daddy, look, I've done poo-poo present. 320 00:13:04.090 --> 00:13:07.529 No. What time do you get up normally anyway? 321 00:13:08.269 --> 00:13:10.509 If I ain't working about five or six, I don't 322 00:13:10.549 --> 00:13:13.600 really sleep that well. Like last night, I've basically, I caught, 323 00:13:14.179 --> 00:13:15.620 been to work a week, had to get my little 324 00:13:15.639 --> 00:13:17.460 boy from nursery on Friday because he had a little 325 00:13:17.480 --> 00:13:19.100 tummy bug and he was being sick. And I caught 326 00:13:19.159 --> 00:13:21.940 it yesterday. So yesterday I was all night being sick, 327 00:13:22.139 --> 00:13:25.120 both ends basically. So I've had not a great night's 328 00:13:25.139 --> 00:13:26.679 sleep today, but it's good because I've got a day off. 329 00:13:26.720 --> 00:13:28.200 So I'm doing these bits and pieces reviews. 330 00:13:28.639 --> 00:13:28.740 Right. 331 00:13:28.759 --> 00:13:31.379 So this is a day off to you. I'd say, Tom, 332 00:13:31.419 --> 00:13:33.019 you do better with less sleep than Josh. 333 00:13:33.519 --> 00:13:35.720 Yeah. I'm not ideal for it. So what time do 334 00:13:35.740 --> 00:13:36.279 you go to bed? 335 00:13:37.149 --> 00:13:39.759 Probably about 10, 10 o'clock-ish, 10, 11. 336 00:13:39.759 --> 00:13:40.659 A gap of three. 337 00:13:41.100 --> 00:13:41.679 Three or three. 338 00:13:44.090 --> 00:13:46.110 So having kids didn't affect you in terms of a 339 00:13:46.149 --> 00:13:47.009 sleep thing at all? 340 00:13:47.470 --> 00:13:48.250 Mate, I'll be fair. 341 00:13:48.269 --> 00:13:51.029 I've always been a really light sleeper. I mean, last night, obviously, 342 00:13:51.049 --> 00:13:53.879 it was terrible. I've hardly any sleep. But it doesn't 343 00:13:53.919 --> 00:13:55.700 really affect me. Like, if the babies wake up, if 344 00:13:55.720 --> 00:13:57.899 everybody wakes up, I'm sort of awake anyway. 345 00:13:58.220 --> 00:14:00.759 And how hands-on are you? Because obviously, you're working at 346 00:14:00.779 --> 00:14:03.179 the markets and up early and out the door. You 347 00:14:03.200 --> 00:14:04.500 came on 8 Out of 10 Cats the other day 348 00:14:04.539 --> 00:14:05.320 up in Manchester. 349 00:14:05.559 --> 00:14:06.200 You're doing this. 350 00:14:06.240 --> 00:14:08.379 You'll do a big book promo tour, I imagine, and 351 00:14:08.399 --> 00:14:10.860 stuff like that. So you are super busy because you've 352 00:14:10.879 --> 00:14:12.720 almost still got your day job and then also this 353 00:14:12.759 --> 00:14:15.409 sort of like TV internet personality job. 354 00:14:15.730 --> 00:14:19.860 Yeah. I'm just really greedy. Yeah. Just extremely greedy. I 355 00:14:19.879 --> 00:14:20.440 want everything. 356 00:14:20.840 --> 00:14:22.500 So how do you fit that in with parenting then? 357 00:14:22.580 --> 00:14:25.379 Is Sinead doing the majority of it and you're doing 358 00:14:25.399 --> 00:14:26.740 bits when you can or do you try and do 359 00:14:26.799 --> 00:14:27.480 more when you're at home? 360 00:14:27.500 --> 00:14:31.110 Do you split it? So Sinead is the governor. Honestly, 361 00:14:31.139 --> 00:14:31.759 let's be honest. 362 00:14:31.990 --> 00:14:37.710 If it's like a nappy changing ratio, she's on like 98%. 363 00:14:37.710 --> 00:14:39.669 My wife's amazing and yeah, she's a legend. 364 00:14:39.730 --> 00:14:41.799 But when I've got a day off, I'll take Henry out. 365 00:14:41.809 --> 00:14:44.250 I'll take the twins out. I'm hands on when I'm indoors, 366 00:14:44.669 --> 00:14:46.980 but nappies and that. I'm not the best at that. 367 00:14:47.000 --> 00:14:47.399 You know what I mean? 368 00:14:47.419 --> 00:14:49.159 I do bottle time. I might be doing that. Yeah, 369 00:14:49.179 --> 00:14:51.019 I do feeding time. I do all the other bits 370 00:14:51.080 --> 00:14:54.019 and pieces. When the nappy comes, no thank you. 371 00:14:54.559 --> 00:14:54.960 Really? 372 00:14:55.179 --> 00:14:56.340 What's your problem with nappies? 373 00:14:56.639 --> 00:14:58.179 I think I made it clear from the start when 374 00:14:58.200 --> 00:15:00.080 we had Emery. The first nappy I changed, I was 375 00:15:00.100 --> 00:15:03.809 sick over the baby. So she's... You're. 376 00:15:03.289 --> 00:15:05.590 Sick on the baby. Well, I mean, I am. But. 377 00:15:07.690 --> 00:15:09.389 Are you not very good with that kind of, that 378 00:15:09.429 --> 00:15:10.409 poo and wee and stuff? 379 00:15:10.610 --> 00:15:13.320 I mean, weasel and dill, it's the poos, like, I mean, 380 00:15:13.340 --> 00:15:14.899 we're potty training them at the minute and what I've 381 00:15:14.919 --> 00:15:17.120 had to do is buy a little tube of hot 382 00:15:17.139 --> 00:15:17.740 wheels cars. 383 00:15:17.960 --> 00:15:19.620 You get 10 cars in a tube. Yeah. 384 00:15:19.679 --> 00:15:21.809 And I've said, every time you go in that potty 385 00:15:21.830 --> 00:15:23.190 and do a poo, you can take out a little 386 00:15:23.210 --> 00:15:24.230 car and play with it, yeah? 387 00:15:24.250 --> 00:15:27.440 Yeah. So obviously now I've got about 400 up-wheel cars 388 00:15:27.500 --> 00:15:31.100 around here. Yeah, he's regular. But now he's just making 389 00:15:31.120 --> 00:15:32.600 them up. He's like, Daddy, look, poo. I'm like, there's 390 00:15:32.620 --> 00:15:33.820 nothing in there. Carpeties? 391 00:15:35.480 --> 00:15:37.870 So do you do the wee nappies, but the poo ones, Sinead? 392 00:15:37.929 --> 00:15:39.549 The wee's are all right. It's the poo. I'll get 393 00:15:39.590 --> 00:15:40.929 the gag and I'll... Really? 394 00:15:41.169 --> 00:15:42.750 So have you always had a problem with poo? 395

00:15:46.169 --> 00:15:48.289 You should work on news night has it always been 396 00:15:48.309 --> 00:15:49.840 a bit of any of that kind of stuff makes 397 00:15:49.860 --> 00:15:50.309 you a bit. 398 00:15:50.580 --> 00:15:52.480 Gagged mate you know what it's like especially when they 399 00:15:52.519 --> 00:15:54.360 come out like runny or grainy and they're all up 400 00:15:54.379 --> 00:15:56.919 their back and they stink it's the. 401 00:15:56.820 --> 00:15:59.519 Worst thing ever they are brutal to be fair are. 402 00:15:59.440 --> 00:16:02.379 Your kids already can you see that they've got your 403 00:16:02.419 --> 00:16:05.980 kind of big personality is Henry. 404 00:16:05.720 --> 00:16:09.610 Is he a little shit yes yeah A chip off 405 00:16:09.639 --> 00:16:10.210 the old block. 406 00:16:10.509 --> 00:16:13.129 He's already trying to do a deal on Hot Wheels cars. 407 00:16:13.169 --> 00:16:15.370 He's on the driveway now flagging down cars to see 408 00:16:15.409 --> 00:16:19.250 if he's got some bits for sale. I mean, the 409 00:16:19.269 --> 00:16:21.830 twins are just babies still, but they're just starting to laugh, 410 00:16:21.870 --> 00:16:23.509 which is beautiful to see them laugh and all that. 411 00:16:23.570 --> 00:16:25.289 I'm loving that. And they're just starting to rock a 412 00:16:25.309 --> 00:16:25.870 little bit now. 413 00:16:26.490 --> 00:16:29.750 And Henry's just a little character. He just makes me die. 414 00:16:29.769 --> 00:16:31.889 The things he comes out with. Yesterday he was going, Daddy, Daddy, 415 00:16:32.149 --> 00:16:34.679 there's this toy. The dog goes like this. And I 416 00:16:34.700 --> 00:16:35.340 was going, oh, yeah. 417 00:16:35.480 --> 00:16:37.500 He's going, you do this. And I was going, all right, 418 00:16:37.519 --> 00:16:39.330 I'll do this. Like that. I don't know why my 419 00:16:39.350 --> 00:16:41.909 son's got a strange accent. No, he sounds like he's 420 00:16:41.929 --> 00:16:43.289 just learning English. Yeah. 421 00:16:47.840 --> 00:16:50.139 So with your work and stuff now then, do you 422 00:16:50.159 --> 00:16:51.940 think you'll always work on the markets and stuff like that? 423 00:16:51.960 --> 00:16:53.379 Or would you ever hand it over to anyone and 424 00:16:53.399 --> 00:16:55.759 do other stuff? Because I can't believe how much you're 425 00:16:55.779 --> 00:16:58.559 still sort of doing long, like 12-hour shifts. Or is 426 00:16:58.580 --> 00:17:00.740 it all nonsense on social media? Or are you actually 427 00:17:00.840 --> 00:17:01.580 out doing that? 428 00:17:01.919 --> 00:17:04.970 Honestly, it really is like... I just love grafting, always 429 00:17:04.990 --> 00:17:05.880 have done from a young kid. 430 00:17:06.099 --> 00:17:09.500 The markets I've done since I was 14, 15 years old. 431 00:17:10.140 --> 00:17:12.180 And all I hold my hands up, I don't do 432 00:17:12.220 --> 00:17:13.799 them anywhere near as what I used to do 10 433 00:17:13.799 -->

00:17:15.059 years ago. I used to do them every single day. 434 00:17:15.079 --> 00:17:17.319 But we do the odd one or two here and there. 435 00:17:17.339 --> 00:17:19.180 And it's great to go out there, see what the 436 00:17:19.200 --> 00:17:21.740 market's like. It's great to support local businesses. It's great 437 00:17:21.759 --> 00:17:23.059 to give people a deal because obviously I still get 438 00:17:23.099 --> 00:17:23.599 things cheaper. 439 00:17:23.480 --> 00:17:23.940 Than everyone else. 440 00:17:23.960 --> 00:17:26.039 Do you know what I mean? The markets have sort 441 00:17:26.079 --> 00:17:27.740 of not become about the money for me now. It's 442 00:17:27.779 --> 00:17:30.500 more because I love them. And obviously when we've got 443 00:17:30.519 --> 00:17:33.079 a quiet day with our businesses, it keeps me staffed. 444 00:17:33.539 --> 00:17:35.140 In work, it's another day's wages, do you know what 445 00:17:35.180 --> 00:17:36.200 I mean? It's another thing to do. So if we've 446 00:17:36.220 --> 00:17:37.369 got a dead week and we've got a bit of 447 00:17:37.390 --> 00:17:38.630 stock down, I say, come, let's go and do a 448 00:17:38.650 --> 00:17:40.869 market on Thursday. We'll go and make a few hundred 449 00:17:40.910 --> 00:17:42.930 quid each, bit of beer money, we have a laugh, 450 00:17:42.970 --> 00:17:43.910 and I just love doing them. 451 00:17:44.250 --> 00:17:47.049 What's the secret of being a good salesman on a market? 452 00:17:47.329 --> 00:17:50.579 Because I did a jumble sale yesterday, and I was 453 00:17:50.700 --> 00:17:53.319 really struggling to shift my copy of Prince Harry's Spare. 454 00:17:53.779 --> 00:17:56.660 It was a fucking nightmare. Should you leave people or 455 00:17:56.680 --> 00:17:58.680 should you be approaching them? Do you know what I mean? Like, 456 00:17:59.220 --> 00:18:00.640 if I go up to someone's stall and they're all 457 00:18:00.740 --> 00:18:01.829 over me, it puts me off. 458 00:18:02.490 --> 00:18:04.539 I've always been a great believer of make people like you, 459 00:18:04.650 --> 00:18:07.440 make people laugh, and then they'll buy from you. People 460 00:18:07.539 --> 00:18:09.599 don't like a pushy salesperson when they're on you. 461 00:18:09.859 --> 00:18:12.319 Hello, mate. Stick it up. You look good in that. 462 00:18:12.640 --> 00:18:15.349 I think let people crack on, make them smile, make 463 00:18:15.369 --> 00:18:17.849 them trust you, make them laugh. And once someone likes you, 464 00:18:18.190 --> 00:18:19.150 you make them fall in love with you and you 465 00:18:19.170 --> 00:18:19.789 can sell them anything. 466 00:18:21.109 --> 00:18:22.890 You sound like a cult leader now. You know, like 467 00:18:22.910 --> 00:18:24.170 a lot of Netflix. Yeah. 468 00:18:25.549 --> 00:18:28.829 So we're from similar backgrounds. You're Essex, I'm South East London. 469 00:18:29.230 --> 00:18:31.099 What did you learn growing up of things that you 470 00:18:31.119

--> 00:18:34.140 want to instill in your kids from your parents' generation? 471 00:18:34.420 --> 00:18:36.319 And what things do you think, now, do you know what? Actually, 472 00:18:36.339 --> 00:18:38.259 that was a little bit too old school, a little 473 00:18:38.279 --> 00:18:40.099 bit too full on. I want to go down a 474 00:18:40.119 --> 00:18:42.680 bit more of a more gentler route. What's your sort 475 00:18:42.700 --> 00:18:44.740 of plan? Because you've got, they're young still. You've got 476 00:18:44.779 --> 00:18:45.220 sort of like. 477 00:18:45.240 --> 00:18:46.220 Yeah, it's early for me. 478 00:18:46.240 --> 00:18:48.559 But I remember things I used to love doing was 479 00:18:48.880 --> 00:18:50.680 when I was like 14 or 15, and that sounds terrible, 480 00:18:50.700 --> 00:18:51.849 but I used to love going to the pub with 481 00:18:51.869 --> 00:18:53.990 my dad. They'll go, oh, yeah, go over to Cost 482 00:18:54.029 --> 00:18:56.230 Cutters and get us a box of fags. Back then, 483 00:18:56.309 --> 00:18:58.069 fags were like four quid. And I'll give me a 484 00:18:58.109 --> 00:18:59.289 tenner there, and they'll go, get them, but I've got 485 00:18:59.309 --> 00:19:01.109 to keep the change. And we'd walk over, and I 486 00:19:01.109 --> 00:19:02.650 know the geezer in the Cost Cutters, and he'd, like, 487 00:19:02.690 --> 00:19:04.349 sell me a box of fags, and I'd, like, pocket 488 00:19:04.369 --> 00:19:06.900 six quid. Obviously, that's not going to happen with my boy, 489 00:19:06.910 --> 00:19:08.349 do you know what I mean? I just want to 490 00:19:08.390 --> 00:19:12.130 teach him the good value manners, obviously very important, being polite, 491 00:19:12.190 --> 00:19:12.960 and hard work. 492 00:19:12.980 --> 00:19:15.140 Look, hard work has made me successful. 493 00:19:14.740 --> 00:19:16.460 Just from working hard and getting on with it, so. 494 00:19:17.109 --> 00:19:18.430 I'd just like to instil that into them. 495 00:19:18.589 --> 00:19:20.410 My mum and dad always made me graft paper rounds 496 00:19:20.470 --> 00:19:22.650 at 12, 13. You've just got to get out there 497 00:19:22.670 --> 00:19:23.710 and give it a go, and I think that's what 498 00:19:23.730 --> 00:19:24.730 I want to push into them. 499 00:19:24.930 --> 00:19:26.670 Take him and your daughters to work on the market 500 00:19:26.690 --> 00:19:29.329 when they're older? Yeah, definitely. There's no better school than 501 00:19:29.450 --> 00:19:30.690 the school of reality, is there, really? 502 00:19:30.789 --> 00:19:32.569 If you push someone in there, out there, in the big, 503 00:19:32.589 --> 00:19:34.809 bad world, if I hadn't have done the markets when 504 00:19:34.829 --> 00:19:36.890 I was a young age, I wouldn't be doing things 505 00:19:36.910 --> 00:19:39.289 that I'm doing now, standing in front of 100 people talking, 506 00:19:39.349 --> 00:19:41.329 because I wouldn't have the confidence, and it's built me 507 00:19:41.390 --> 00:19:42.109 up to be like that. 508 00:19:42.789 --> 00:19:44.859 And what was it like that first day when you 509 00:19:44.880 --> 00:19:46.619 had to do a market? Were you nervous? 510 00:19:47.359 --> 00:19:48.460 I don't even remember doing my first. 511 00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:50.750 I remember sitting up stools hard when I was a 512 00:19:50.789 --> 00:19:52.470 kid you'd set up stalls especially in the winter and 513 00:19:52.490 --> 00:19:54.619 your hands were like These were these metal setups and 514 00:19:54.640 --> 00:19:56.339 your hands are freezing, you know what I mean? And 515 00:19:56.359 --> 00:19:58.200 your fingerless gloves trying to get them in. And I 516 00:19:58.200 --> 00:20:00.019 remember they'd go like, do you want to come back. 517 00:20:00.059 --> 00:20:01.710 Put it down later on? And you'd go, yeah, go on, 518 00:20:01.740 --> 00:20:03.180 I'll do it for another five or a tenner. 519 00:20:03.720 --> 00:20:05.890 I remember like, some would go, we're busy on Saturday, 520 00:20:05.910 --> 00:20:07.230 do you want to earn 40 quid or 30 quid? 521 00:20:07.309 --> 00:20:08.950 And you'd think, yeah. Like when you're a kid, that's 522 00:20:08.990 --> 00:20:10.009 loads of money, you know what I mean? 523 00:20:10.190 --> 00:20:10.450 Yeah. 524 00:20:10.630 --> 00:20:12.890 I remember when I was about 18 and I was 525 00:20:12.910 --> 00:20:15.140 doing them on my own, My dad. 526 00:20:14.980 --> 00:20:16.259 Was selling a load of handbags. 527 00:20:16.559 --> 00:20:17.940 So was he a market trader as well? 528 00:20:18.000 --> 00:20:20.849 Yeah, but he stopped doing the markets probably 20 years ago. 529 00:20:20.869 --> 00:20:25.910 He had a women's little boutique he shopped selling just crap. 530 00:20:25.990 --> 00:20:30.950 He was just like purses and handbags and pashminas and 531 00:20:31.150 --> 00:20:33.460 two for a fiver and things like that. But he 532 00:20:33.480 --> 00:20:34.940 was just off the market and he went, I've got 533 00:20:34.960 --> 00:20:36.920 a few hundred bags here. All the zips are broke. 534 00:20:36.980 --> 00:20:38.799 Do you want them for a pound each? I mean, 535 00:20:38.819 --> 00:20:40.740 you're going in, but it's all broken bags. And I 536 00:20:40.740 --> 00:20:42.519 remember going and dagging the market, putting them all in. 537 00:20:42.519 --> 00:20:44.000 I was sitting there all the night before fixing them 538 00:20:44.039 --> 00:20:46.000 up and all that. I was sort of always buying 539 00:20:46.039 --> 00:20:47.119 and selling and giving it a go, and I just 540 00:20:47.160 --> 00:20:48.180 remember enjoying doing that. 541 00:20:48.589 --> 00:20:49.670 You've got to love it to do it. 542 00:20:50.150 --> 00:20:52.130 Yeah, you did some store stuff, didn't you, Rob? 543 00:20:52.450 --> 00:20:54.650 I used to work at a Columbia Road flower market. Yeah, 544 00:20:54.690 --> 00:20:55.309 brilliant market. 545 00:20:55.369 --> 00:20:57.269 Yeah, my brother's

mate had a shop there, but then 546 00:20:57.289 --> 00:20:59.049 I was selling compost at the front of it on 547 00:20:59.069 --> 00:20:59.509 a little stall. 548 00:20:59.710 --> 00:21:00.549 And were you good at it? 549 00:21:00.930 --> 00:21:03.079 I was all right at it, but I was so tired. 550 00:21:03.099 --> 00:21:04.980 I was only 14, so I wasn't as confident as 551 00:21:05.079 --> 00:21:06.160 I am now kind of thing. 552 00:21:06.180 --> 00:21:06.259 Yeah. 553 00:21:06.950 --> 00:21:08.730 I remember getting picked up at like 3, 4 a.m. 554 00:21:08.779 --> 00:21:09.359 On a Sunday. 555 00:21:09.410 --> 00:21:13.119 All I can remember is how easy it is to 556 00:21:13.180 --> 00:21:13.880 drive through London. 557 00:21:14.779 --> 00:21:16.299 Yeah, no traffic. No traffic. 558 00:21:16.319 --> 00:21:19.119 That was the best part. It's like 28 days later 559 00:21:19.140 --> 00:21:22.039 in the morning. Tom, were you there for the births? 560 00:21:22.079 --> 00:21:24.119 How were the births of Henry and then the twins? 561 00:21:24.240 --> 00:21:26.299 Do you know the story about the twins? No, I don't. 562 00:21:27.019 --> 00:21:27.740 I wonder now, though. 563 00:21:28.279 --> 00:21:30.579 I will start with the twins because it's epic. So 564 00:21:30.599 --> 00:21:32.000 I'm sweating a little bit because I'm a bit under 565 00:21:32.019 --> 00:21:32.440 the weather. 566 00:21:32.460 --> 00:21:33.119 Sorry. It's all right. 567 00:21:33.490 --> 00:21:35.490 If you need to go and be sick or shit yourself, don't. 568 00:21:35.289 --> 00:21:37.109 Worry about it. I've got a bucket here, don't worry. 569 00:21:37.130 --> 00:21:38.809 Or have a shit and then be sick because you've 570 00:21:38.849 --> 00:21:40.309 seen some shit, but that's another option. 571 00:21:40.349 --> 00:21:41.769 I'll send a little Hot Wheel to you for doing 572 00:21:41.789 --> 00:21:42.130 a good job. 573 00:21:42.190 --> 00:21:43.130 Thank you. 574 00:21:43.839 --> 00:21:46.680 So when the twins were born, so basically I got 575 00:21:46.740 --> 00:21:48.240 offered probably one of the best jobs I've ever been 576 00:21:48.259 --> 00:21:50.099 in my life, and that was to manage West Ham 577 00:21:50.119 --> 00:21:50.579 in America. 578 00:21:51.269 --> 00:21:55.049 Right, okay. Essentially it happened. So it was like five, 579 00:21:55.170 --> 00:21:56.509 six days before Prague. 580 00:21:56.690 --> 00:22:00.380 Was that when West Ham went and won the Europa Conference? 581 00:22:00.630 --> 00:22:01.299 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 582 00:22:01.579 --> 00:22:03.279 But this had been booked up since January, so we 583 00:22:03.299 --> 00:22:04.480 didn't know if we were going to get that far. 584 00:22:04.500 --> 00:22:06.710 But the plan was if West Ham... We're going to 585 00:22:06.730 --> 00:22:08.269 go to America, manage the team, then. 586 00:22:08.150 --> 00:22:08.670 Fly to Prague. 587 00:22:08.690 --> 00:22:09.990 What do you mean by manage the team? 588 00:22:10.150 --> 00:22:12.279 So I was managing the West Ham Legends team. 589 00:22:12.339 --> 00:22:15.269 So it was like all our best players from like 10, 590 00:22:15.269 --> 00:22:19.400 15 years ago. You had Matty Jarvis, Marlon Harewood, Anton Ferdinand, 591 00:22:19.599 --> 00:22:21.740 Elliot Wald, like some brilliant, brilliant players. 592 00:22:21.759 --> 00:22:24.359 You had Jimmy Walker. And he said he was fucking sick. 593 00:22:24.380 --> 00:22:26.369 But it's like your dream as a West Ham fan 594 00:22:26.380 --> 00:22:27.140 to all these people. 595 00:22:27.160 --> 00:22:28.849 Yeah, so it was like, these are like the players 596 00:22:28.890 --> 00:22:31.829 that I've watched growing up and I absolutely love them. 597 00:22:31.849 --> 00:22:32.789 Where in America was you? 598 00:22:32.910 --> 00:22:34.930 North Carolina. Oh, so what a gig. 599 00:22:34.950 --> 00:22:37.490 You're getting paid to go over there, all social media 600 00:22:37.509 --> 00:22:38.250 stuff with a club. 601 00:22:38.269 --> 00:22:38.670 It's insane. 602 00:22:38.829 --> 00:22:41.589 Dortmund was out there. Wolves was out there. Insane. 603 00:22:41.609 --> 00:22:43.869 It was a seven-a-side tournament and they've asked me to 604 00:22:43.890 --> 00:22:46.849 manage them. So basically, I've gone to Sinead. The babies 605 00:22:46.910 --> 00:22:47.589 weren't due. 606 00:22:48.250 --> 00:22:50.230 Look at him. He's putting his hands up. Here we go. 607 00:22:50.250 --> 00:22:55.130 The babies weren't due. until the start of July. Okay, 608 00:22:55.210 --> 00:22:57.150 and when's this? When are you out there? Well, it's 609 00:22:57.190 --> 00:23:00.079 the 1st of June, basically. It's right at the start 610 00:23:00.119 --> 00:23:02.039 of June. Like a month before the baby's due. 611 00:23:02.059 --> 00:23:04.359 A month before, and obviously Prague was on the, what 612 00:23:04.380 --> 00:23:07.619 was it, 6th, 7th? Anyway, it was five days out there. 613 00:23:08.180 --> 00:23:09.960 One day I was travelling. I've gone to her, look, baby, 614 00:23:09.980 --> 00:23:12.400 if you don't want me to go, I will stay home. 615 00:23:12.759 --> 00:23:16.039 But it's West Ham. Imagine the team, like, I can't 616 00:23:16.059 --> 00:23:16.609 turn this down. 617 00:23:16.920 --> 00:23:19.069 And also, it is a month until they're due. 618 00:23:19.329 --> 00:23:21.819 So I'm all at me. I've rung Sinead's sister. She's 619 00:23:21.880 --> 00:23:24.599 moved in round my house. I'm going for five days. Now, 620 00:23:24.660 --> 00:23:27.559 I've never been to America before in my life. I've 621 00:23:27.599 --> 00:23:32.349 never been there. You know what's happening, don't you? I've 622 00:23:32.390 --> 00:23:35.230 got on the plane and because it was all booked 623 00:23:35.250 --> 00:23:37.029 in a bit last minute, all the players had thought 624 00:23:37.049 --> 00:23:39.730 it all over the plane. I've ended up sitting next 625 00:23:39.750 -->

00:23:43.349 to these two Americans, lovely couple, proper Americans, like legends. 626 00:23:43.369 --> 00:23:45.789 They was cracking me up. We had the best flight ever. 627 00:23:45.809 --> 00:23:47.890 They was talking about, they'd been over to London. They 628 00:23:47.910 --> 00:23:49.339 tried fish and chips. And I was like, I've never 629 00:23:49.359 --> 00:23:49.940 been to America. 630 00:23:50.480 --> 00:23:51.700 They must have thought you was on some sort of 631 00:23:51.720 --> 00:23:54.140 caricature version of a London, like a paid character. 632 00:23:54.160 --> 00:23:57.579 Yeah. Like we were talking about cockney rhyming, slagging, all sorts. 633 00:23:57.619 --> 00:24:00.259 Like it was brilliant. But we got there. As we've 634 00:24:00.299 --> 00:24:02.480 got to the gate, everyone's. 635 00:24:02.140 --> 00:24:05.579 Gone through and there's just literally the biggest security guard 636 00:24:05.740 --> 00:24:07.369 and his two coppers with guns. 637 00:24:07.849 --> 00:24:10.109 Just picked me up, took me into a room, and 638 00:24:10.150 --> 00:24:14.150 I was like, oh, no. And then I sat there, 639 00:24:14.269 --> 00:24:16.069 and all the team obviously couldn't wait. They'd gone back 640 00:24:16.089 --> 00:24:17.029 to the hotel. I was in there for a couple 641 00:24:17.069 --> 00:24:17.470 of hours. 642 00:24:18.210 --> 00:24:21.349 Basically, I didn't declare that from many years ago, I 643 00:24:21.529 --> 00:24:23.289 had a couple of little criminal records. 644 00:24:23.329 --> 00:24:27.329 Nothing bad, yeah. A couple of little criminal records. 645 00:24:27.369 --> 00:24:30.190 As many criminal records as senses. Just a couple of 646 00:24:30.210 --> 00:24:33.059 little petty stuff. Petty stuff that I'd done when I 647 00:24:33.099 --> 00:24:38.160 was a child, yeah. Anyway, so because I didn't declare it, 648 00:24:38.180 --> 00:24:39.500 they was like, we're going to send you back. And 649 00:24:39.539 --> 00:24:43.109 I literally sat there pleading with these American police officers 650 00:24:43.390 --> 00:24:45.230 and these border control people, talking. 651 00:24:45.269 --> 00:24:46.390 I was like, I'm managing West Ham. 652 00:24:46.410 --> 00:24:47.309 I was like, shut up. 653 00:24:47.549 --> 00:24:50.789 I'm literally managing West Ham, yeah? Elliot Ward. You must 654 00:24:50.829 --> 00:24:53.210 have heard of Elliot Ward. Come on. Come on. 655 00:24:53.309 --> 00:24:56.079 Anton Ferdinand, Rio's brother. 656 00:24:56.170 --> 00:24:59.599 The guy had pulled up all bits about me on Google. 657 00:24:59.940 --> 00:25:00.500 Yeah, yeah. 658 00:25:00.559 --> 00:25:02.980 And he was like, I'm reading your social media, boy. 659 00:25:03.740 --> 00:25:05.349 Do you like drugs? I was like, I met a 660 00:25:05.349 --> 00:25:06.230 man in West Ham, mate. 661 00:25:06.250 --> 00:25:06.970 He's like, okay. 662 00:25:07.710 --> 00:25:08.789 You sure you don't like drugs? 663 00:25:08.809 --> 00:25:10.910 Sometimes I like to party a little bit, have a 664 00:25:10.950 --> 00:25:12.829 few drinks, things get passed around. 665 00:25:12.849 --> 00:25:13.730 Do you like drugs? 666 00:25:13.759 --> 00:25:15.119 I was like, mate, I swear to you, I don't 667 00:25:15.140 --> 00:25:16.339 like drugs. 668 00:25:16.480 --> 00:25:20.720 What from someone eating a lasagna at 3am makes you think, well, 669 00:25:20.779 --> 00:25:22.299 it would make you think they're on drugs actually. 670 00:25:23.059 --> 00:25:25.660 But anyway, finally, we've got into the country. They've let 671 00:25:25.700 --> 00:25:27.829 me in. West Ham have spoke to them. Basically, I 672 00:25:27.869 --> 00:25:29.309 was told I can't go to America until I do 673 00:25:29.329 --> 00:25:31.190 a proper visa in the future. But this time he's 674 00:25:31.210 --> 00:25:33.269 letting me off because he's bringing people to the town 675 00:25:33.650 --> 00:25:35.349 of Raleigh and it's going to be good for the community. 676 00:25:35.369 --> 00:25:36.150 So I was like, happy days. 677 00:25:37.240 --> 00:25:41.759 So I've now somehow got into America, got to the hotel. 678 00:25:42.299 --> 00:25:44.359 Then we've had a bit of dinner. Next day, we're 679 00:25:44.380 --> 00:25:46.380 doing a training day. So I'm walking about a big 680 00:25:46.420 --> 00:25:49.960 American flag. I'm on ESPN. I'm the governor out there. 681 00:25:50.160 --> 00:25:55.140 I'm giving it boss to everyone. Tom Skinner in America 682 00:25:55.200 --> 00:25:56.420 taking over. It's the best day of my life. 683 00:25:56.720 --> 00:25:58.900 Because I've never been to America. I want to go 684 00:25:58.920 --> 00:26:00.420 to a diner. I want to do this. You might 685 00:26:00.440 --> 00:26:02.460 not be invited back. Yeah. 686 00:26:03.000 --> 00:26:06.160 Anyway, the third day, this is the day of our first... 687 00:26:06.259 --> 00:26:08.599 game we've got two games lined up now I've put 688 00:26:08.619 --> 00:26:10.420 my manager's kit on like I am ready. 689 00:26:10.259 --> 00:26:12.119 What's your manager's kit just to oh it's. 690 00:26:12.059 --> 00:26:13.559 Like the West Ham one all the zip up the 691 00:26:13.599 --> 00:26:14.900 Betway he's just the governor what. 692 00:26:14.819 --> 00:26:19.019 All the players are wearing yeah yeah basically. 693 00:26:17.880 --> 00:26:21.880 Yeah full kit in my element like couldn't sleep I'm 694 00:26:21.920 --> 00:26:24.380 writing all things down but inside my belly I had 695 00:26:24.400 --> 00:26:26.250 this weird little feeling that something went right I don't 696 00:26:26.269 --> 00:26:28.730 know what it was so I've rung Sinead now you 697 00:26:28.769 --> 00:26:31.130 guys was in London was five hours in front or 698 00:26:31.170 --> 00:26:33.130 six hours in front so it's about one o'clock and 699 00:26:33.170 --> 00:26:35.089 it's nice and early in the morning in America so 700 00:26:35.170 --> 00:26:37.230 I've Once you're playing on stage, come on,

I've got 701 00:26:37.250 --> 00:26:40.809 to go to the hospital about lunchtime or whenever it 702 00:26:40.849 --> 00:26:43.609 was because we've got to just check up and they've 703 00:26:43.630 --> 00:26:45.430 got to book in the date for the cesarean because 704 00:26:45.450 --> 00:26:46.950 their twins have to come out of the cesarean. 705 00:26:47.299 --> 00:26:47.519 Yeah. 706 00:26:47.579 --> 00:26:48.640 So I've gone, oh, fantastic. 707 00:26:49.740 --> 00:26:52.079 Got ready, gone downstairs, thought nothing of it, had a 708 00:26:52.099 --> 00:26:54.920 bit of breakfast, chatted with Savon Hines, had a bacon 709 00:26:54.960 --> 00:26:56.500 roll with Savon Hines. 710 00:26:57.019 --> 00:26:57.279 Oh, no. 711 00:26:57.619 --> 00:26:59.900 He doesn't know who he is. Anyway, don't worry. I 712 00:26:59.920 --> 00:27:02.900 thought it was a sauce. Legend, legend. Another legend. Yeah. 713 00:27:03.480 --> 00:27:05.000 Had a bacon roll event on Thursday night. 714 00:27:05.019 --> 00:27:05.640 That's all she did. 715 00:27:06.240 --> 00:27:08.569 Went upstairs to grab me trainers and everything, and me bag. 716 00:27:09.089 --> 00:27:11.750 Sinead rang me crying. Couldn't breathe. I said, well, what's 717 00:27:11.769 --> 00:27:12.529 the matter? You okay? 718 00:27:13.289 --> 00:27:15.220 I said, well, calm down, calm down. She went, where 719 00:27:15.319 --> 00:27:17.000 are you? She went, I'm in the hospital with a doctor. 720 00:27:17.319 --> 00:27:19.660 I said, put the doctor on. She's passed the phone 721 00:27:19.680 --> 00:27:21.900 to the doctor, and the doctor said, look, basically, Tom, 722 00:27:21.980 --> 00:27:25.140 it's not great news. Twin B, the smaller of the two, 723 00:27:25.240 --> 00:27:28.599 is basically in a bad way. Her heart rate's really dropped, 724 00:27:28.700 --> 00:27:31.920 and if we don't get her out straight away, we've 725 00:27:32.009 --> 00:27:33.869 got a very, very high risk you're going to lose her. 726 00:27:34.369 --> 00:27:36.430 Potentially, if it goes wrong, lose your wife. 727 00:27:36.630 --> 00:27:37.829 Oh, my fucking God. 728 00:27:37.930 --> 00:27:40.869 I'm in fucking America, and I'm thinking, well, I could 729 00:27:40.890 --> 00:27:41.769 potentially lose everyone. 730 00:27:42.029 --> 00:27:42.250 Yeah. 731 00:27:42.309 --> 00:27:43.309 I'm going to come back, and it's going to be 732 00:27:43.329 --> 00:27:45.210 me and Emory. She was going through my head. Burst 733 00:27:45.230 --> 00:27:47.839 that client. I've jumped in the lift, gone downstairs. All 734 00:27:47.859 --> 00:27:50.599 the players, we're queuing to go on the coach. Yeah. 735 00:27:51.039 --> 00:27:52.759 I've got to go home. They're like, you what? 736 00:27:53.079 --> 00:27:53.380 Yeah. 737 00:27:53.400 --> 00:27:54.200 Told them the story. 738 00:27:54.220 --> 00:27:58.309 And because it was being documented, yeah, he just stuck 739 00:27:58.329 --> 00:27:59.430 a camera straight in my face. 740 00:27:59.450 --> 00:28:01.150 And I was like, mate. Oh, no. 741 00:28:01.930 --> 00:28:02.769 Oh, my God. 742 00:28:02.809 --> 00:28:04.670 He was like, can you just explain to the whole 743 00:28:04.710 --> 00:28:06.309 team on the bus what's happening? And the last thing 744 00:28:06.329 --> 00:28:07.430 I wanted to do was this. I'm like, look, guys, 745 00:28:07.470 --> 00:28:07.769 I need to go. 746 00:28:07.789 --> 00:28:10.109 My wife might die. My baby's in trouble. I'm really 747 00:28:10.150 --> 00:28:12.150 sure I can't be here with you. Yeah. Did you 748 00:28:12.170 --> 00:28:13.579 win the game? No. 749 00:28:15.640 --> 00:28:16.500 Also, we're playing 3-5-2. 750 00:28:16.619 --> 00:28:21.109 Yeah, yeah, yeah. We've got the coach in the stadium. 751 00:28:21.869 --> 00:28:23.890 I'm running back looking for a fucking cab. I can't 752 00:28:23.930 --> 00:28:26.670 find a cab anywhere to get to the airport. I've 753 00:28:26.690 --> 00:28:28.049 gone back on the bus. I said, mate, take me 754 00:28:28.089 --> 00:28:28.650 to the airport. 755 00:28:28.750 --> 00:28:31.809 He's a bus driver. He's gone. Family, brother. No problem. 756 00:28:31.950 --> 00:28:33.390 It's like saying out of a film. So I'm straight 757 00:28:33.430 --> 00:28:34.509 to the airport. I've jumped out. 758 00:28:34.549 --> 00:28:35.029 I've run. 759 00:28:35.049 --> 00:28:37.470 There's a massive queue. I'm all upset. I went, mate, 760 00:28:37.529 --> 00:28:38.650 I need to get in front of you. I've got 761 00:28:38.690 --> 00:28:40.339 to the front of the queue. This woman's sitting there. 762 00:28:40.380 --> 00:28:42.380 I've gone, listen, I need the next flight back to London. 763 00:28:42.420 --> 00:28:44.019 I don't care what it costs, where I've got to go. 764 00:28:44.339 --> 00:28:48.339 I need it, yeah? She's gone, sorry, sir, there's nothing. 765 00:28:48.700 --> 00:28:50.480 I thought I could do these American accents. I like it. 766 00:28:50.559 --> 00:28:53.220 It's good. And now I'm thinking, what can we do? 767 00:28:53.240 --> 00:28:53.609 What can we do? 768 00:28:53.619 --> 00:28:56.380 She went, well, the only flight there is, is in 769 00:28:56.400 --> 00:28:58.990 a few hours. It's from Philadelphia. So you have to 770 00:28:59.029 --> 00:29:01.529 come back here in a few hours, fly from here, 771 00:29:01.569 --> 00:29:04.450 go to Philadelphia, wait at Philadelphia, then fly to Heathrow. 772 00:29:04.650 --> 00:29:06.049 Right. I said, I don't care what it is. I'll 773 00:29:06.069 --> 00:29:09.009 have it, boss. Job done. Now, I've rung her up. 774 00:29:09.049 --> 00:29:11.150 She's calmed down. She's with her sister. She's in the wall. 775 00:29:11.369 --> 00:29:14.589 They're prepping all to have an operation. Told her the plan. 776 00:29:14.799 --> 00:29:17.319 But I've now got four hours to kill. So I've 777 00:29:17.359 --> 00:29:20.500 run back outside. Yeah. This is all true, by the way. 778 00:29:21.119 --> 00:29:23.619 I've

seen the bus driver like wingling out. I've run 779 00:29:23.680 --> 00:29:26.019 up the thing. Jumped back on the bus and said, 780 00:29:26.039 --> 00:29:28.359 take me back to the stadium. Yeah. 781 00:29:28.460 --> 00:29:31.920 I thought, well, fuck it. I've got four hours to kill, yeah? 782 00:29:31.940 --> 00:29:32.529 My sister's there. 783 00:29:32.769 --> 00:29:35.670 I am not missing managing West Ham. I've gone back 784 00:29:35.690 --> 00:29:38.150 to the stadium. The kickoff flight, so it was 11 785 00:29:38.150 --> 00:29:41.089 o'clock and it is like five to 11. I've pulled in, 786 00:29:41.099 --> 00:29:43.220 I've run, I've jumped over the gate, I'm running down. 787 00:29:43.480 --> 00:29:46.519 I've gone through the seats, done a roll onto the pitch. 788 00:29:46.859 --> 00:29:49.740 They're in a circle just before the kickoff. They've gone, Tom, 789 00:29:49.779 --> 00:29:52.119 what are you doing here? And I was like, well, listen, 790 00:29:52.420 --> 00:29:54.349 got the plane sorted, had a few hours to kill. 791 00:29:54.549 --> 00:29:57.329 There's no way I'm not managing West Ham. So now 792 00:29:57.369 --> 00:30:01.549 I've stood in the circle. I have given the best motivational. 793 00:30:00.849 --> 00:30:03.049 Speech of my life. I've stood there. 794 00:30:03.349 --> 00:30:05.130 Listen, we're going to do this for my daughters, my wife, 795 00:30:05.470 --> 00:30:07.349 Anton Ferdinand. He was the best defender I've ever seen 796 00:30:07.369 --> 00:30:09.049 in my time. And I was just going off and 797 00:30:09.130 --> 00:30:09.970 on and on and on and on. 798 00:30:09.970 --> 00:30:14.240 So you're lying as well? These players were so buzzed. 799 00:30:14.319 --> 00:30:15.680 I was buzzed. Everyone's crying. 800 00:30:16.119 --> 00:30:16.319 Boom. 801 00:30:16.740 --> 00:30:18.029 We got battered 3-1. 802 00:30:23.240 --> 00:30:25.359 After that, I've run off. I've gone, guys, good luck 803 00:30:25.380 --> 00:30:26.519 for the next game. I'm going to have to go. 804 00:30:27.079 --> 00:30:31.009 Straight back to the airport. Now, as we've got through security, 805 00:30:31.029 --> 00:30:35.740 Sinead's sister Siobhan has rung me crying. So now, Tom, 806 00:30:35.759 --> 00:30:37.839 it's not good, it's not good. She said, whoa, whoa, whoa, 807 00:30:37.859 --> 00:30:43.140 I'm going for security. She had the result, 3-1. You're kidding. 808 00:30:43.200 --> 00:30:44.430 You had a good few chances, though. 809 00:30:44.470 --> 00:30:47.690 Possession, 80%. Sorry, what else? Oh, sorry, yes, Sinead. 810 00:30:48.329 --> 00:30:50.269 So she's got to know that Sinead's in the operating room. 811 00:30:50.309 --> 00:30:51.990 There's about 10 doctors in there. There's been a problem. 812 00:30:52.029 --> 00:30:53.690 I don't know what's going on. She's crying. But then 813 00:30:53.750 --> 00:30:55.690 I said, well, let me go for security. I said, listen, 814 00:30:55.710 --> 00:30:58.210 sort yourself out. I said, you're with your sister. Go 815 00:30:58.230 --> 00:30:59.690 in there, because I'm not there. And be there for 816 00:30:59.710 --> 00:31:01.450 her now, yeah? Like, come on, let's be strong here. 817 00:31:01.630 --> 00:31:03.990 Yeah. I've got through security. She's running again. 818 00:31:04.019 --> 00:31:05.400 We're going to lose her. We're going to lose her. 819 00:31:05.559 --> 00:31:07.799 I said, I've just gone, listen, I'm not having that. 820 00:31:07.839 --> 00:31:10.579 I've got the ump now. I've gone, this is nonsense. 821 00:31:10.619 --> 00:31:12.279 Go in there, be there for her, hold her hand. 822 00:31:12.299 --> 00:31:13.640 She's going, all right, Tom, all right, Tom, all right, Tom. 823 00:31:14.460 --> 00:31:17.200 Boarded the plane. And obviously, as you know, Americans are 824 00:31:17.460 --> 00:31:20.700 larger than life people, literally. So I'm stuck on the 825 00:31:20.759 --> 00:31:22.799 edge of this aisle seat. I'm not a small guy either. 826 00:31:22.859 --> 00:31:26.940 I'm 6'1, like 18 stone, and I'm small, yeah? And 827 00:31:26.980 --> 00:31:29.220 I'm stuck in this aisle seat. And I literally got 828 00:31:29.240 --> 00:31:32.750 a text from Siobhan saying, $ 2 a bomb. Picture, they're 829 00:31:32.829 --> 00:31:37.049 on these little inkies, tubes everywhere. £ 3 each, they're bombed. 830 00:31:37.049 --> 00:31:37.650 £ 3? 831 00:31:37.349 --> 00:31:40.109 Well, they're so early. The planes took off. I've texted back, 832 00:31:40.450 --> 00:31:44.490 how's Sinead? Lost signal. You can't make this up, right? Oh, God. 833 00:31:44.539 --> 00:31:47.039 So now I'm on a 45-minute flight to Philadelphia. 834 00:31:47.059 --> 00:31:48.140 Oh, my God. 835 00:31:48.180 --> 00:31:51.619 Not knowing if my wife's alive. And I'm just like, 836 00:31:52.119 --> 00:31:52.839 what do I do? What do I do? 837 00:31:52.859 --> 00:31:55.799 I'm trying to buy the Wi-Fi so I can text. $ 25, like, 838 00:31:55.900 --> 00:31:59.740 it didn't even work. Then as we're coming into land... 839 00:32:00.390 --> 00:32:04.680 We are a hundred foot from the runway, cabin crew, 840 00:32:04.700 --> 00:32:05.460 everyone's sitting down. 841 00:32:05.519 --> 00:32:05.859 It's nothing. 842 00:32:05.880 --> 00:32:08.700 All of a sudden the captains give a little race 843 00:32:09.000 --> 00:32:09.900 on the speakers. 844 00:32:10.259 --> 00:32:13.470 I've gone fucking what? I've undone my belt and I've 845 00:32:13.529 --> 00:32:14.269 stood up to look around. 846 00:32:14.289 --> 00:32:16.890 Everyone's screaming. The plane is pulled up and banked right. 847 00:32:16.930 --> 00:32:20.690 Like I've never seen before. He's done a last second 848 00:32:20.799 --> 00:32:23.339 go around because another plane had been told to go 849 00:32:23.380 --> 00:32:25.460 onto the runway and it was going to be a collision. 850 00:32:26.160 --> 00:32:26.960 Oh, my God. 851 00:32:27.220 --> 00:32:28.079 But now I'm thinking. 852 00:32:28.160 -->

00:32:30.420 You thought he was about to get a signal? Yeah, 853 00:32:30.480 --> 00:32:32.980 I thought he was about to die. I'm dying. 854 00:32:33.019 --> 00:32:34.920 But now I'm thinking I'm going to miss my connecting 855 00:32:34.940 --> 00:32:35.569 flight to Heathrow. 856 00:32:35.589 --> 00:32:38.430 Aren't I? Oh, yeah. So, anyway, we've come back round, landed. 857 00:32:38.769 --> 00:32:40.589 I've rung her. Snake's boom, she's in recovery. She's out 858 00:32:40.630 --> 00:32:42.369 of cold, but she's fine. Pressure off. 859 00:32:42.390 --> 00:32:45.390 I know it's going to sound really stereotypically British here, yeah, 860 00:32:45.769 --> 00:32:49.599 but I got to the terminal... the big British Airways sign. 861 00:32:49.640 --> 00:32:51.099 And then I got on the plane and the captain 862 00:32:51.119 --> 00:32:52.680 was like, ladies and gentlemen, like, I was like. 863 00:32:52.779 --> 00:32:55.000 Thank fuck we're on the way home. We're safe. We're 864 00:32:55.039 --> 00:32:55.500 getting there. 865 00:32:55.519 --> 00:32:57.930 I was like, listen, I had a nice glass of wine. 866 00:32:58.230 --> 00:33:01.650 I had a bit of steak and chips. Everything was good. 867 00:33:02.130 --> 00:33:04.170 And we flew back and I got Wi-Fi and everything 868 00:33:04.190 --> 00:33:04.529 was all right. 869 00:33:04.549 --> 00:33:05.150 And I was relaxed. 870 00:33:05.230 --> 00:33:07.470 And I landed, my mate Cole was a black cab driver. 871 00:33:07.490 --> 00:33:09.339 He was like, now I'm a full-time driver in the 872 00:33:09.380 --> 00:33:12.119 Bosch cab. Waited for me outside, took me straight to 873 00:33:12.140 --> 00:33:14.400 the hospital. And I sat there with my wife and 874 00:33:14.420 --> 00:33:15.680 she was in recovery, bless her legend. 875 00:33:15.740 --> 00:33:15.900 Yeah. 876 00:33:16.869 --> 00:33:18.910 And the two twins were tiny little things, tubes everywhere, 877 00:33:19.180 --> 00:33:25.210 but in these little plastic ovens, incubators. And as I've 878 00:33:25.230 --> 00:33:27.289 got there, now I've not slept for two days because 879 00:33:27.329 --> 00:33:29.630 of everything that's gone from there. I've got there and 880 00:33:29.650 --> 00:33:31.470 I'm sitting with my wife, sitting with the babies. And 881 00:33:31.549 --> 00:33:33.170 someone said, Tommy, you go home, you're looking exhausted, just 882 00:33:33.210 --> 00:33:35.230 go home. I went home and I remember coming back 883 00:33:35.250 --> 00:33:37.259 to my house, sitting on that sofa over there and 884 00:33:37.359 --> 00:33:39.279 two of our sisters were around. And I said, I 885 00:33:39.319 --> 00:33:40.779 feel really bad. I've only been up the hospital for 886 00:33:40.799 --> 00:33:41.839 half an hour. They was like, Tom, we're talking about 887 00:33:41.859 --> 00:33:43.740 you've been sitting there for eight hours. Whereas in such 888 00:33:43.799 --> 00:33:45.779 a day, I sat there with the twins, just looking 889 00:33:45.799 --> 00:33:46.359 at them for hours. 890 00:33:46.819 --> 00:33:47.500 Oh my God. 891 00:33:47.799 --> 00:33:49.160 And then a few weeks later, they all come out 892 00:33:49.180 --> 00:33:52.000 of hospital, Everyone's all healthy and everyone's doing well. The 893 00:33:52.039 --> 00:33:53.779 twins are not doing well, you know what I mean? 894 00:33:53.839 --> 00:33:55.940 Everyone's good. Oh, brilliant. 895 00:33:56.269 --> 00:33:57.220 Bloody hell. What a story. 896 00:33:57.289 --> 00:33:59.029 A round of applause there on the podcast. 897 00:33:59.430 --> 00:34:01.650 Are they on weight now and stuff, the twins? 898 00:34:01.789 --> 00:34:03.829 They're still small. They're only 10 pounds each and they're 899 00:34:03.849 --> 00:34:04.410 four months old. 900 00:34:04.490 --> 00:34:06.529 Because they're only three months old really, aren't they? 901 00:34:06.549 --> 00:34:10.210 Because a month early. They were so small, like three pounds. 902 00:34:10.510 --> 00:34:13.429 I found it really difficult doing the babies when they 903 00:34:13.449 --> 00:34:15.429 were little, even when they were like seven, eight pounds. 904 00:34:15.449 --> 00:34:17.230 But it's a three-pound baby and you're a big guy, 905 00:34:17.269 --> 00:34:17.789 big hand. 906 00:34:17.929 --> 00:34:19.250 Just pick them up one hand. Yeah. 907 00:34:22.619 --> 00:34:25.900 I don't know if we need the first birth story. 908 00:34:25.920 --> 00:34:27.860 I think you've done the big one there. I mean, 909 00:34:27.880 --> 00:34:30.489 the first one, he got strangulated, but he was all right. 910 00:34:30.510 --> 00:34:32.309 I remember just sitting there eating Percy pigs. 911 00:34:34.059 --> 00:34:36.900 Was you nervous because you're sort of super confident and 912 00:34:37.260 --> 00:34:39.380 happy-go-lucky and positive but like when she was getting the 913 00:34:39.400 --> 00:34:42.329 contractions and she went in was you getting nervous and 914 00:34:42.550 --> 00:34:43.670 worried of course. 915 00:34:43.449 --> 00:34:47.329 I mean even henry's birth wasn't just like easy because 916 00:34:47.349 --> 00:34:50.110 he was strangulated well with the umbilical cord yeah so 917 00:34:50.130 --> 00:34:51.469 they had to get him out in a certain amount 918 00:34:51.489 --> 00:34:52.750 of time and she didn't know what's going on i 919 00:34:52.769 --> 00:34:54.469 remember she talked to the doctor and this doctor she 920 00:34:54.489 --> 00:34:56.050 was like an angel she went to me like tom 921 00:34:56.070 --> 00:34:58.369 like we've only got literally a minute to do this 922 00:34:58.429 --> 00:35:01.010 like when it happens so We need to get everything right. 923 00:35:01.050 --> 00:35:02.210 So she went to me, do you want to tell 924 00:35:02.230 --> 00:35:03.570 your wife? I went, no, don't tell her. I'll go 925 00:35:03.610 --> 00:35:05.010 in there, hold her hand. And literally, I sat there 926 00:35:05.070 --> 00:35:07.659 eating Percy Pigs. Mate, it's actually

in my book, the 927 00:35:07.679 --> 00:35:08.980 picture of the Percy Pigs. 928 00:35:09.519 --> 00:35:11.159 Oh, I bet the photos are good in the book. 929 00:35:11.519 --> 00:35:14.480 But there's the Percy Pigs. How much food there is? 930 00:35:14.480 --> 00:35:16.760 Have you seen that, Josh? No, show us the photo 931 00:35:16.820 --> 00:35:19.000 of the food. We'll read out what he took. Because 932 00:35:19.019 --> 00:35:21.019 Sinead's not eating, is she? She's giving birth. 933 00:35:21.059 --> 00:35:22.480 No. That's just for you, isn't it? 934 00:35:23.179 --> 00:35:24.079 Fucking hell. 935 00:35:24.199 --> 00:35:28.260 So there's three sandwiches, two chocolate bars, Percy Pigs and pineapple, 936 00:35:28.280 --> 00:35:30.989 four bottles of water, two tubs of chocolates and then 937 00:35:31.210 --> 00:35:31.690 some fruit. 938 00:35:31.730 --> 00:35:32.429 What are those cups? 939 00:35:32.789 --> 00:35:35.530 They're tubs of like their millionaire shortbreads from Spencer's. 940 00:35:35.610 --> 00:35:38.340 Oh, fucking hell. 941 00:35:38.360 --> 00:35:40.199 So tell us about the book, Tom. So the book 942 00:35:40.219 --> 00:35:41.460 is the maddest thing I've ever done in my life. 943 00:35:41.480 --> 00:35:43.039 I've never thought in a million years I'd be writing 944 00:35:43.079 --> 00:35:43.639 a book. Yeah. 945 00:35:43.780 --> 00:35:45.000 Well, I didn't. A ghostwriter helped me, but. 946 00:35:49.570 --> 00:35:51.849 Refreshing honesty, that's what we're looking for. 947 00:35:51.909 --> 00:35:53.510 Mate, I work with a guy called Nick Arden. He 948 00:35:53.530 --> 00:35:54.409 was an absolute legend. 949 00:35:54.449 --> 00:35:56.349 He followed me about in my van for a few weeks, yeah, 950 00:35:56.829 --> 00:35:58.250 and he literally thought I was insane. 951 00:35:58.570 --> 00:36:00.510 He's like, when do you sleep and why do you 952 00:36:00.570 --> 00:36:01.070 eat so much? 953 00:36:04.030 --> 00:36:05.949 You do eat a lot, but you train a lot 954 00:36:05.989 --> 00:36:08.050 and you're on the go, which burns calories, but you 955 00:36:08.090 --> 00:36:09.130 do pack it away, don't you? 956 00:36:09.150 --> 00:36:11.389 Do you know what? I reckon I eat probably 5, no, 957 00:36:11.409 --> 00:36:14.150 maybe more, 6,000 calories a day. It ain't mega, mega, 958 00:36:14.349 --> 00:36:15.369 but it's like a lot. 959 00:36:15.389 --> 00:36:17.869 But I do train, but I look like a fat geezer. 960 00:36:20.690 --> 00:36:23.929 Sometimes I see you on Instagram and you look rock solid, 961 00:36:24.280 --> 00:36:27.340 athletic and muscly. And no offence, Tom, some days I 962 00:36:27.360 --> 00:36:29.300 sort of feel like, is that his brother that I've 963 00:36:29.320 --> 00:36:31.699 not met yet? Because he looked like a completely different person. 964 00:36:31.760 --> 00:36:33.139 It depends if I've been on the beers all weekend 965 00:36:33.199 --> 00:36:33.420 or not. 966 00:36:33.719 --> 00:36:36.119 If he's

cut down to just 4,000 calories, then he's 967 00:36:36.139 --> 00:36:39.110 looking really good by that point. So what's your 6,000 cows? 968 00:36:39.130 --> 00:36:39.769 Talk me through them. 969 00:36:40.090 --> 00:36:42.070 Every morning I'll have dinner for breakfast, regardless of what 970 00:36:42.090 --> 00:36:44.349 day of the week it is. Whether it be lasagna, 971 00:36:44.389 --> 00:36:47.230 chili con carne, jacked potato, baked beans, cheese. 972 00:36:47.250 --> 00:36:48.769 And that's about 4am, is that? 973 00:36:49.090 --> 00:36:49.800 Early, yeah, early. 974 00:36:50.699 --> 00:36:53.599 Then if we're in a market, I will end up 975 00:36:53.699 --> 00:36:56.260 having something else around eight or nine. Yeah. 976 00:36:56.360 --> 00:36:58.019 But it'd be like bacon rye or a little hot 977 00:36:58.059 --> 00:37:00.320 dog or something like that. Yeah. Then I'll have a 978 00:37:00.340 --> 00:37:02.449 bit of lunch. It's going to sound so bad. What 979 00:37:02.570 --> 00:37:04.750 would you have for lunch? Would you come home or 980 00:37:04.789 --> 00:37:05.849 is that out at a cafe? 981 00:37:05.909 --> 00:37:08.250 No, normally Sinead does me a packed lunch, which would 982 00:37:08.269 --> 00:37:11.050 be like a couple of little sandwiches, maybe like some 983 00:37:11.110 --> 00:37:13.550 chilli from last night, a couple of boiled eggs, you know, 984 00:37:13.570 --> 00:37:15.110 the usual few bags of crisps. 985 00:37:15.610 --> 00:37:18.539 A few bags of crisps? How many bags? Not that many, 986 00:37:18.639 --> 00:37:22.949 two or three. Yeah. Some Dairy Dunkers and them little 987 00:37:22.969 --> 00:37:24.219 snack attacks out of a Henry. 988 00:37:27.460 --> 00:37:29.199 And then dinner is at a home that you do 989 00:37:29.219 --> 00:37:30.579 a lot of cooking, don't you? 990 00:37:30.920 --> 00:37:31.139 Yeah. 991 00:37:31.159 --> 00:37:33.679 I normally cook the dinner. Right. If it's quite good, 992 00:37:33.699 --> 00:37:34.940 I'd film it and put it on Instagram. 993 00:37:34.960 --> 00:37:37.380 Yeah, I've seen that as well, yeah. Big portions as well. 994 00:37:37.400 --> 00:37:38.320 Of course. 995 00:37:38.400 --> 00:37:40.590 Because my house is so open, there's always a family 996 00:37:40.619 --> 00:37:42.429 and friends in and out. Like, I will cook for 997 00:37:42.429 --> 00:37:43.650 10 people every night of the week. 998 00:37:43.670 --> 00:37:43.949 Right, okay. 999 00:37:44.010 --> 00:37:45.489 And my mate will pop in from the gym. Like, 1000 00:37:45.510 --> 00:37:47.269 my other friend will come round with his missus. My 1001 00:37:47.309 --> 00:37:49.469 mum and my pop right. So, very family orientated. The 1002 00:37:49.489 --> 00:37:52.110 doors are always open. Like, so, Probably the only time 1003 00:37:52.420 --> 00:37:53.599 you'd be in my house and no one's in it, 1004 00:37:53.619 --> 00:37:55.579 just me. Do you find it weird being in the 1005 00:37:55.599 --> 00:37:57.340 house on your own? I find that weird. 1006 00:37:57.559 --> 00:38:01.940 Yeah, I get scared. No, I just, I don't like 1007 00:38:01.960 --> 00:38:02.659 being indoors on my own. 1008 00:38:02.980 --> 00:38:05.980 Do you like being alone at all? Say, for example, 1009 00:38:06.019 --> 00:38:08.300 Sinead was taking all the kids away with her family 1010 00:38:08.320 --> 00:38:10.719 or something for the weekend and you weren't allowed to 1011 00:38:10.760 --> 00:38:11.599 socialise with people. 1012 00:38:11.659 --> 00:38:13.760 How would you struggle with that weekend? Which means I 1013 00:38:13.780 --> 00:38:16.820 wasn't allowed to socialise with people. She just locks me 1014 00:38:16.840 --> 00:38:19.309 in the house. Bye. But I think you love being 1015 00:38:19.329 --> 00:38:20.969 around people, don't you? You feed off it. If she'd 1016 00:38:20.989 --> 00:38:22.610 done that, I'd be like, touch, straight down the pub 1017 00:38:22.630 --> 00:38:25.250 with my pals. Right, OK. You know exactly what's happening. Oh, 1018 00:38:25.250 --> 00:38:28.349 I'm in a party. I thought that would be the way, yeah. 1019 00:38:28.429 --> 00:38:31.329 Because when we had our second, I'd normally leave Lou 1020 00:38:31.369 --> 00:38:34.050 with the baby and then take the toddler out for 1021 00:38:34.070 --> 00:38:36.909 the day. Because really, with the twins, it's hard on 1022 00:38:36.929 --> 00:38:39.199 your own with the twins, but it's a lot calmer 1023 00:38:39.219 --> 00:38:40.920 if there's not a kid trying to do a poo 1024 00:38:40.940 --> 00:38:42.920 in a pot and throw a car at the kids. 1025 00:38:43.159 --> 00:38:44.599 So you're finding you're spending a lot more time with 1026 00:38:44.619 --> 00:38:45.980 Henry at weekends and stuff? 1027 00:38:46.340 --> 00:38:48.099 Yeah, I mean, when I can, I bring Henry with 1028 00:38:48.119 --> 00:38:50.449 me places, take him out. We'll be doing lovely little 1029 00:38:50.469 --> 00:38:52.170 day skis, like a town down the park. I've got 1030 00:38:52.190 --> 00:38:53.489 him a season ticket at West Ham. 1031 00:38:53.889 --> 00:38:56.500 Oh, really? At three. Not even three yet. 1032 00:38:56.780 --> 00:38:59.469 His first game was at home against Chelsea and he 1033 00:38:59.489 --> 00:39:02.530 was just standing in the chair going, irons, irons, all game. 1034 00:39:02.590 --> 00:39:04.349 He didn't have a clue what was going on, but 1035 00:39:04.369 --> 00:39:06.170 he loved it. We had a really good day. I 1036 00:39:06.170 --> 00:39:07.389 took him on a train the other week, went to 1037 00:39:07.409 --> 00:39:10.469 the London History Museum. I just try and do things 1038 00:39:10.530 --> 00:39:13.369 that I think little memories he'll remember when he gets older. 1039 00:39:13.389 --> 00:39:14.389 I don't know, just try and do the right thing, 1040 00:39:14.409 --> 00:39:16.070 didn't you? Do you want him to go down. 1041 00:39:16.699 --> 00:39:20.119 the own business grafting do your own thing

route or 1042 00:39:20.199 --> 00:39:25.130 would you like to see him at uni and being 1043 00:39:25.170 --> 00:39:27.909 more academic and going down that route yeah i mean. 1044 00:39:27.809 --> 00:39:29.619 I left school early, went straight to work. I got 1045 00:39:29.699 --> 00:39:31.260 expelled from school for selling pornos. 1046 00:39:32.420 --> 00:39:35.010 Is that why you weren't allowed into America? Selling pornos 1047 00:39:35.090 --> 00:39:35.429 at school? 1048 00:39:35.469 --> 00:39:36.230 One of the reasons. 1049 00:39:36.889 --> 00:39:38.829 I've always worked, and listen, I've been up and down 1050 00:39:38.889 --> 00:39:41.150 so many times in my life, like, One minute, I'd 1051 00:39:41.170 --> 00:39:44.409 have a few quid, nice van, nice flat. Next minute, 1052 00:39:44.429 --> 00:39:46.530 I'd be skint, back of my mum's house. My mum's 1053 00:39:46.570 --> 00:39:48.630 got a two-up, two-down house. There'd be no room for me, 1054 00:39:48.670 --> 00:39:50.150 so I'd be laying on a little pulled-out futon in 1055 00:39:50.170 --> 00:39:52.230 the front room. It's the front door. 1056 00:39:52.250 --> 00:39:53.510 What's he doing there? You know what I mean? 1057 00:39:53.690 --> 00:39:57.420 So I think I would like my kids to get 1058 00:39:57.440 --> 00:40:01.320 a proper job and not have that worry of where's 1059 00:40:01.340 --> 00:40:02.300 your next pound come from. 1060 00:40:02.480 --> 00:40:04.559 Touch wood, I mean... I'm lucky now. 1061 00:40:04.659 --> 00:40:07.460 I'm in a very fortunate situation where I could take 1062 00:40:07.480 --> 00:40:09.039 a couple of months off and I'm fortunate. 1063 00:40:09.280 --> 00:40:10.179 But back then I couldn't. 1064 00:40:10.219 --> 00:40:11.840 It was like, you need to go work every day. 1065 00:40:11.849 --> 00:40:13.230 Hand to mouth. You know what I mean? Yeah. 1066 00:40:13.369 --> 00:40:15.909 And it was just hard because if it rained all week, 1067 00:40:15.969 --> 00:40:17.269 you weren't going to work on a market. 1068 00:40:17.289 --> 00:40:18.130 So you had no readies. 1069 00:40:18.570 --> 00:40:18.809 Yeah. 1070 00:40:19.090 --> 00:40:20.880 And then buying stock, buying the right stock. 1071 00:40:21.219 --> 00:40:22.619 I think I would like them to get a proper 1072 00:40:22.659 --> 00:40:25.099 job where they can progress and do well. And they 1073 00:40:25.159 --> 00:40:27.300 haven't got to go through the struggles and the all 1074 00:40:27.320 --> 00:40:29.659 the mad stuff that i've done the strokes i've pulled 1075 00:40:29.699 --> 00:40:33.699 you know i mean the fights i've had. 1076 00:40:32.659 --> 00:40:33.920 What about if they said they wanted to go on 1077 00:40:33.940 --> 00:40:34.960 the apprentice. 1078 00:40:34.719 --> 00:40:36.940 Yeah i'll definitely do that that's really good fun yeah 1079 00:40:36.960 --> 00:40:39.099 you enjoyed that i think do you like sugar mate 1080 00:40:39.119 --> 00:40:41.179 he's actually all right he's actually all right i mean 1081 00:40:41.639 --> 00:40:45.340 i didn't realize how short he was bless him he's 1082 00:40:45.380 --> 00:40:47.739 tiny but he's a nice guy i mean i've got 1083 00:40:47.800 --> 00:40:50.090 on well with him but when you go on that 1084 00:40:50.119 --> 00:40:52.559 show The first thing everyone says is how good they 1085 00:40:52.579 --> 00:40:54.739 are in business. And I'm thinking, you can't be that 1086 00:40:54.800 --> 00:40:56.599 good because you're really trying to get a quarter million quid. 1087 00:40:56.639 --> 00:40:58.099 Like if you was good, you'd have a quarter million quid, 1088 00:40:58.119 --> 00:40:58.820 wouldn't you? 1089 00:40:58.840 --> 00:40:59.699 Let's be honest. 1090 00:41:01.079 --> 00:41:02.340 But I took it for what it was. I had 1091 00:41:02.380 --> 00:41:03.780 a laugh on it. I just enjoyed it and took 1092 00:41:03.820 --> 00:41:05.440 it as experience. Look where I am now for the 1093 00:41:05.460 --> 00:41:07.159 back of it. So yeah, one of the best things 1094 00:41:07.179 --> 00:41:07.519 I've ever done. 1095 00:41:07.920 --> 00:41:09.639 You all live in a house together, don't you? 1096 00:41:10.039 --> 00:41:10.360 Yeah. 1097 00:41:10.530 --> 00:41:13.170 It's like being in jail, mate, right? So you turn up, 1098 00:41:13.210 --> 00:41:16.269 they go phone, money, keys, strip you of all your stuff. 1099 00:41:16.750 --> 00:41:18.449 You get chucked in the house. You get your little cell, 1100 00:41:18.949 --> 00:41:21.150 your little room. There's like three to a room and 1101 00:41:21.170 --> 00:41:22.769 literally you're told when to eat, told when to go 1102 00:41:22.809 --> 00:41:24.550 to bed. You can't watch telly. You can't speak to 1103 00:41:24.570 --> 00:41:27.050 your family. And I was there for seven weeks. So 1104 00:41:27.090 --> 00:41:27.730 it was hard. 1105 00:41:28.289 --> 00:41:29.969 It was hard. You do miss your friends and family. 1106 00:41:29.989 --> 00:41:31.369 I mean, I did sneak out once, but. 1107 00:41:31.750 --> 00:41:34.130 Were you able to source your lasagna at 4am? What 1108 00:41:34.150 --> 00:41:34.570 was going on? 1109 00:41:34.590 --> 00:41:37.550 The house we stayed in was in Finchley. Now, my 1110 00:41:37.590 --> 00:41:39.769 wife and my family are from Finchley Park in North London, 1111 00:41:39.789 --> 00:41:40.670 literally around the corner. 1112 00:41:40.889 --> 00:41:42.510 There's a pub I know. So I literally one night 1113 00:41:42.590 --> 00:41:43.550 jumped out of the window. 1114 00:41:45.769 --> 00:41:46.989 Went to the pub, had no money. He was like, 1115 00:41:47.010 --> 00:41:48.030 can I have two pints? I was like, of course 1116 00:41:48.050 --> 00:41:49.489 you can. Told him what I was doing, didn't believe me. 1117 00:41:49.809 --> 00:41:51.210 Come back, jumped back through the window because it was 1118 00:41:51.230 --> 00:41:52.389 this big old manor house. 1119 00:41:52.449 --> 00:41:54.780 Yeah. Off of, I

can't think what it's called. Anyway, 1120 00:41:54.800 --> 00:41:56.880 it's where all the big guys are. Right. Okay. 1121 00:41:56.900 --> 00:41:58.679 It's one of the big ones. It's strange you've got 1122 00:41:58.699 --> 00:42:00.059 to get all the candidates in there. 1123 00:42:00.239 --> 00:42:02.199 There's like 18 people in there. It's like a big 1124 00:42:02.239 --> 00:42:04.699 brother house, just bigger. Oh, so you didn't have kids then? 1125 00:42:04.980 --> 00:42:06.500 That was just you and Sinead? No, it didn't. Just 1126 00:42:06.539 --> 00:42:07.039 me and Sinead. 1127 00:42:07.159 --> 00:42:08.800 How would you feel if you did something like The Jungle? 1128 00:42:09.530 --> 00:42:11.360 I've been the bookie's favourite to do that for three 1129 00:42:11.389 --> 00:42:13.420 years in a row, yeah. Are you doing it? Well, 1130 00:42:13.920 --> 00:42:16.539 I don't know at the minute. Oh, really? 1131 00:42:16.659 --> 00:42:19.400 But listen, I mean, it'd probably be the wrong time 1132 00:42:19.460 --> 00:42:21.440 at the minute with the babies, but I would love 1133 00:42:21.500 --> 00:42:23.500 to do it. I mean, I don't think, apart from 1134 00:42:23.519 --> 00:42:25.269 the hiats, there wouldn't be a challenge I wouldn't do. 1135 00:42:25.690 --> 00:42:28.170 You'd eat everything. Changing a nappy? Changing a nappy. 1136 00:42:28.510 --> 00:42:29.150 Dex nappy. 1137 00:42:29.730 --> 00:42:31.550 But whose nappy would you change? 1138 00:42:31.929 --> 00:42:36.010 Ant and Dex. Ant and Dex. Ant and Dex nappy, yeah. 1139 00:42:36.050 --> 00:42:41.469 Give Ant a break. Everyone in real life is smaller 1140 00:42:41.489 --> 00:42:43.820 than what they appear on a telly, yeah? Fact, right? 1141 00:42:43.860 --> 00:42:44.940 Apart from me, yeah? 1142 00:42:44.960 --> 00:42:47.079 I don't know why this is, because they say the 1143 00:42:47.119 --> 00:42:50.139 camera adds 10 pounds, right? But it must be minus 1144 00:42:50.159 --> 00:42:52.469 four cameras on me, because people go, Cor, you look 1145 00:42:52.489 --> 00:42:53.329 a lot better on a telly. 1146 00:42:57.949 --> 00:43:00.010 We didn't actually get to, what's the book about? Is 1147 00:43:00.070 --> 00:43:00.929 it your life story? 1148 00:43:01.329 --> 00:43:05.420 So the book is about... Graft, How to Smash Life. 1149 00:43:06.260 --> 00:43:07.300 Bosh. 1150 00:43:07.360 --> 00:43:11.420 Bosh. It's not an autobiography. It's more life lessons and 1151 00:43:11.480 --> 00:43:15.260 stories that happened to me. It's a funny book. Basically, 1152 00:43:15.280 --> 00:43:17.500 a few people have read it and said it's absolutely hilarious. 1153 00:43:18.039 --> 00:43:20.179 There's stories in there when I've been abroad and I 1154 00:43:20.300 --> 00:43:23.579 nearly got shot and killed. There's also stories in there 1155 00:43:23.599 --> 00:43:26.389 when I'm in a market stall. Anything I thought could 1156 00:43:26.530 --> 00:43:27.559 give someone a lesson in life. 1157 00:43:28.110 --> 00:43:28.989 I've put in that book. 1158 00:43:29.110 --> 00:43:30.670 I've read an advanced copy of it, one of the 1159 00:43:30.690 --> 00:43:33.050 only ones we've read, because we've got the same publisher, Kelly. 1160 00:43:33.150 --> 00:43:34.289 Yeah, I love Kelly. 1161 00:43:34.389 --> 00:43:36.730 She's so lovely. She's really, really good. Obviously, as well, 1162 00:43:36.750 --> 00:43:39.449 you've got dyslexia to quite a high degree, which you 1163 00:43:39.489 --> 00:43:41.519 might find it really difficult. And Kelly was really helpful 1164 00:43:41.539 --> 00:43:42.960 in me doing all that kind of stuff. But she 1165 00:43:43.000 --> 00:43:45.960 sent me a copy, and it's really funny. It's a proper, like, authentic. 1166 00:43:45.980 --> 00:43:48.940 And I think that's why you're so... popular is what 1167 00:43:48.980 --> 00:43:50.719 you see is what you get really with you and 1168 00:43:50.739 --> 00:43:52.179 i think it comes across in the book so you're 1169 00:43:52.199 --> 00:43:54.119 not putting any punches in it thanks mate. 1170 00:43:54.139 --> 00:43:56.280 There's a few stars i couldn't put in there because 1171 00:43:56.579 --> 00:44:00.300 i thought i'd go oh no no i think my 1172 00:44:00.340 --> 00:44:03.920 management would stab me fair enough if you've got management. 1173 00:44:03.500 --> 00:44:05.420 Are you not across the deals though because you're like 1174 00:44:05.440 --> 00:44:08.280 the ultimate deal maker right it must be difficult for 1175 00:44:08.300 --> 00:44:10.090 you to go i reckon you could get me a 1176 00:44:10.110 --> 00:44:11.349 better deal than that right. 1177 00:44:11.590 --> 00:44:14.550 Well, classic example, we'd done a brand deal with McDonald's, yeah? 1178 00:44:14.750 --> 00:44:16.090 And I was like, can I come to the meeting, please? 1179 00:44:16.110 --> 00:44:17.730 And they were like, no. And I was like, please, please, 1180 00:44:17.750 --> 00:44:19.489 let me come to the meeting. I was like, all right. 1181 00:44:19.829 --> 00:44:21.230 Got to the meeting, I got the money straight up. 1182 00:44:21.230 --> 00:44:22.829 I was like, listen, mate, I just. 1183 00:44:22.829 --> 00:44:24.989 Ran with them in the meeting. They were all looking 1184 00:44:25.010 --> 00:44:26.130 at me like, Tom, what are you doing at McDonald's? 1185 00:44:26.150 --> 00:44:27.829 I was like, listen, we're getting money out of these. 1186 00:44:27.849 --> 00:44:28.469 Did it work? 1187 00:44:28.650 --> 00:44:31.539 Of course it did, yeah. 1188 00:44:33.079 --> 00:44:35.219 And is Henry at nursery yet or anything like that? 1189 00:44:35.280 --> 00:44:37.280 Yeah, he's at nursery. How was that dropping him off? 1190 00:44:37.739 --> 00:44:38.099 Do you know what? 1191 00:44:38.119 --> 00:44:40.420 The first one, we went together and it was like, 1192 00:44:41.039 --> 00:44:42.719 How's he going to be? But he loves it. He's 1193 00:44:42.739 --> 00:44:45.619 got his little mate

called Lenny and he goes, Daddy, 1194 00:44:45.659 --> 00:44:47.510 nursery with Lenny. And I go, yeah, yeah, yeah. He 1195 00:44:47.530 --> 00:44:50.090 loves it. And he enjoys nursery. He's good in there. 1196 00:44:50.449 --> 00:44:54.090 Since going to nursery, you've obviously seen this, how fast 1197 00:44:54.110 --> 00:44:54.710 they progress. 1198 00:44:54.730 --> 00:44:57.860 Oh, it's mad. And how runny does their nose get? Yeah. 1199 00:45:00.389 --> 00:45:03.469 Their vocabulary increases and they have to make space in their. 1200 00:45:03.389 --> 00:45:07.599 Head for it. Constant stream of snot. Always ill. 1201 00:45:07.699 --> 00:45:09.420 They're always bringing back it. That's probably what you got. 1202 00:45:10.099 --> 00:45:12.139 I had to go and pick him up Friday last week. 1203 00:45:12.639 --> 00:45:13.900 And I was like, yeah, he's fine, but he's just 1204 00:45:13.920 --> 00:45:15.960 been sick. And I was like, oh, no problem. Then 1205 00:45:16.179 --> 00:45:17.699 I went to a boxing event on Saturday. I was 1206 00:45:17.989 --> 00:45:20.010 boxing this big London team with Ricky Hatton and Johnny 1207 00:45:20.050 --> 00:45:22.070 Nelson and all that. So I got a few put-arounds 1208 00:45:22.090 --> 00:45:23.570 with my wife. She was in bed with it all day. 1209 00:45:23.610 --> 00:45:25.989 And then yesterday, I didn't get the second half. 1210 00:45:25.849 --> 00:45:27.369 Of the day. So hopefully it's all gone now. 1211 00:45:27.940 --> 00:45:29.840 With the twins, have you had the twins on your 1212 00:45:29.909 --> 00:45:31.530 own overnight yet or anything like that? 1213 00:45:31.710 --> 00:45:31.789 No. 1214 00:45:31.809 --> 00:45:32.070 No. 1215 00:45:32.210 --> 00:45:35.409 I'm not allowed. What, to have the twins on your own? 1216 00:45:35.730 --> 00:45:36.130 No, yeah. 1217 00:45:36.590 --> 00:45:40.380 No, no, no, no, no. Listen, it's going to sound terrible, yeah? Okay. 1218 00:45:40.559 --> 00:45:44.380 I'm still struggling to tell them apart. Oh, what, the twins? 1219 00:45:44.400 --> 00:45:45.119 So you don't know. 1220 00:45:45.000 --> 00:45:49.860 What's at what? Because they are identical and the weight 1221 00:45:49.940 --> 00:45:53.019 is identical. Everything's identical, yeah? The only thing you can 1222 00:45:53.059 --> 00:45:56.570 tell is Roma, yeah? She's got like a little bit 1223 00:45:56.590 --> 00:45:57.610 of a bump. 1224 00:45:57.369 --> 00:45:57.869 On her head. 1225 00:45:58.250 --> 00:46:00.929 But when you put them together like that, it's like 1226 00:46:01.230 --> 00:46:03.679 looking at two identical things. They're so alike. 1227 00:46:03.880 --> 00:46:05.619 Well, my friends had to do that. They had twins 1228 00:46:05.639 --> 00:46:08.320 and they ended up painting the nail varnishes. So one 1229 00:46:08.360 --> 00:46:10.340 had a red nail varnish, one had a blue nail varnish. 1230 00:46:10.719 --> 00:46:12.019 just to tell them apart, especially in the middle of 1231 00:46:12.039 --> 00:46:12.420 the night. 1232 00:46:12.440 --> 00:46:14.829 Because you don't want to feed them twice. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, 1233 00:46:14.909 --> 00:46:15.849 just to stop you feeding them. 1234 00:46:16.070 --> 00:46:17.710 I've got a marker pen and put A and B 1235 00:46:17.750 --> 00:46:21.590 on their heads, which makes them mental. 1236 00:46:22.090 --> 00:46:27.949 I think nail binding might be easier. Sharpie on their head. Josh, 1237 00:46:28.010 --> 00:46:29.670 anything else before we do the final question? 1238 00:46:29.849 --> 00:46:32.389 I've got 600 questions about how The Apprentice works, Rob, 1239 00:46:32.409 --> 00:46:34.050 but I don't know whether this is the podcast. 1240 00:46:34.070 --> 00:46:35.960 Oh, you can do some more Apprentice questions if you want. 1241 00:46:36.400 --> 00:46:37.219 How set up is it? 1242 00:46:37.780 --> 00:46:41.719 Oh, massively. But it's brilliant. Thank you very much. 1243 00:46:42.079 --> 00:46:43.679 One of the biggest things about The Apprentice that no 1244 00:46:43.699 --> 00:46:46.579 one knows is if you're doing a task and you've 1245 00:46:46.619 --> 00:46:48.630 got something to do and it's not filmed, it's not 1246 00:46:48.650 --> 00:46:50.510 filmed on a camera, it doesn't count. 1247 00:46:51.090 --> 00:46:52.650 Really? What do you mean? So they'll send you out 1248 00:46:52.690 --> 00:46:53.630 and go, you've got to sell the tickets. 1249 00:46:53.789 --> 00:46:55.550 You could go and sell every single ticket, but if 1250 00:46:55.570 --> 00:46:57.110 you didn't have a camera watching it, it doesn't count 1251 00:46:57.150 --> 00:46:57.590 for the show. 1252 00:46:57.889 --> 00:46:58.250 No. 1253 00:46:58.650 --> 00:47:00.869 Anyone who's watched this, watching this podcast, who wants to 1254 00:47:00.889 --> 00:47:02.949 go on the apprentice, make friends with the camera guys. 1255 00:47:05.570 --> 00:47:08.030 Because if they don't follow you and they don't track you, 1256 00:47:08.190 --> 00:47:09.809 how can they show on the show if it doesn't exist? 1257 00:47:10.250 --> 00:47:12.690 I always think it must be really annoying when you're 1258 00:47:13.130 --> 00:47:14.829 desperately trying to sell a load of stuff and then 1259 00:47:14.849 --> 00:47:16.710 they pull you aside for an interview and you're like, 1260 00:47:16.849 --> 00:47:18.489 I really could do without this because I'm trying to, 1261 00:47:19.030 --> 00:47:20.289 Sell some scarves. 1262 00:47:19.929 --> 00:47:21.849 On a market stall. What I do, like I make 1263 00:47:21.889 --> 00:47:23.650 in a minute. I ain't doing one now. I'm just 1264 00:47:23.670 --> 00:47:25.949 carrying doing something. But when you do a task, it's 1265 00:47:26.010 --> 00:47:26.969 three days long as well. 1266 00:47:27.449 --> 00:47:27.670 Right. 1267 00:47:27.829 --> 00:47:29.630 What? Yeah, so one task is three days. 1268 00:47:30.329 --> 00:47:32.449 And what goes into it is insane because you actually 1269

00:47:32.489 --> 00:47:34.349 are running about all day getting in cabs, going here, 1270 00:47:34.369 --> 00:47:34.769 going there. 1271 00:47:34.789 --> 00:47:38.260 It's very, very long. And the boardroom takes three to 1272 00:47:38.320 --> 00:47:39.719 four hours to film. 1273 00:47:40.559 --> 00:47:43.059 Oh, my God. That must be exhausting. 1274 00:47:43.400 --> 00:47:45.300 Lord Sugar, I love him. Lovely bloke. 1275 00:47:45.320 --> 00:47:47.039 But he's getting a little bit now and he forgets 1276 00:47:47.079 --> 00:47:50.199 his lines. and like he'll just like randomly just start 1277 00:47:50.280 --> 00:47:53.139 screaming at someone and get their name wrong and then 1278 00:47:53.420 --> 00:47:55.280 they'll go you got his name wrong and they'll go 1279 00:47:55.340 --> 00:47:56.650 oh and he'll do it again and just scream at 1280 00:47:56.659 --> 00:47:57.860 the same person again. 1281 00:47:59.329 --> 00:48:03.929 You're sacked oh shit what is it fine hard to 1282 00:48:03.949 --> 00:48:05.989 remember your line it's been a pleasure to talk to 1283 00:48:06.010 --> 00:48:08.150 you Tom Josh I feel like there's another apprentice question 1284 00:48:08.170 --> 00:48:08.550 you've got. 1285 00:48:08.449 --> 00:48:13.010 More what's that cafe like shit Oh, so bad. You 1286 00:48:13.030 --> 00:48:14.929 know that one in cash that just has, like, a 1287 00:48:14.949 --> 00:48:17.030 couple of cakes with psyllophane over it and some Mars bars? 1288 00:48:17.070 --> 00:48:17.429 Yeah. 1289 00:48:17.630 --> 00:48:19.780 A couple of, like, Rios. It ain't a great cash. 1290 00:48:19.949 --> 00:48:20.139 No, fair. 1291 00:48:20.219 --> 00:48:22.280 And you know when you win the task, I always 1292 00:48:22.300 --> 00:48:24.500 think those things look so fucking shit when you go 1293 00:48:24.539 --> 00:48:25.860 to a cocktail-making class. 1294 00:48:25.980 --> 00:48:28.639 Well, obviously, I only won one task, yeah, and this is, like, 1295 00:48:28.659 --> 00:48:30.719 this is a few million, yeah? So if I've got, like, oh, 1296 00:48:30.780 --> 00:48:33.579 lunch at the Shard, like, these sorts ain't good, what 1297 00:48:33.599 --> 00:48:38.639 did I get? Fucking rowing lesson, right? Yeah. They was like, oh, yeah, 1298 00:48:38.659 --> 00:48:40.860 so I had to sit in a pool with, like, 1299 00:48:40.880 --> 00:48:43.840 the other six guys in my team in a canoe 1300 00:48:43.860 --> 00:48:48.829 and just row against a thing while someone's going, row, row. 1301 00:48:48.889 --> 00:48:50.429 And I was like, this is a joke, isn't it? Like, 1302 00:48:50.449 --> 00:48:51.210 this is not funny. 1303 00:48:51.269 --> 00:48:51.869 That is awful. 1304 00:48:54.269 --> 00:48:54.750 Terrible. 1305 00:48:54.769 --> 00:48:57.469 That's not going to incentivise you to do well, is it? 1306 00:48:57.489 --> 00:48:59.849 That's why I lost the rest of them. On purpose. 1307 00:49:00.230 --> 00:49:01.429 And what's it like to be fired? 1308 00:49:01.489 --> 00:49:02.670 Is that a relief in the end? 1309 00:49:03.550 --> 00:49:05.269 No, because you obviously want the money, don't you? 1310 00:49:05.289 --> 00:49:06.590 Right, yeah. 1311 00:49:07.050 --> 00:49:07.880 I want them reddies. 1312 00:49:08.340 --> 00:49:11.139 Final question, Tom, but it's about Sinead. We don't ask 1313 00:49:11.199 --> 00:49:13.500 everyone about Sinead, just for you, obviously, it's about Sinead. 1314 00:49:13.800 --> 00:49:15.949 What's the one thing she does parenting-wise that makes you go, oh, 1315 00:49:16.070 --> 00:49:19.010 she's amazing, I'm so lucky to have her as my 1316 00:49:19.150 --> 00:49:19.969 partner and mother? 1317 00:49:20.139 --> 00:49:20.679 Of my kids? 1318 00:49:20.760 --> 00:49:22.079 And then what's the one thing she does that sort 1319 00:49:22.099 --> 00:49:23.820 of frustrates you a little bit with the kids that 1320 00:49:24.099 --> 00:49:26.360 if she was listening, she might go, yeah, he's got 1321 00:49:26.389 --> 00:49:26.909 a fair point? 1322 00:49:27.329 --> 00:49:30.510 So I think that the way she's just so honest, 1323 00:49:30.530 --> 00:49:31.329 she knows what the babies want. 1324 00:49:31.349 --> 00:49:33.989 She knows which one's which. Yeah, she knows what babies want. 1325 00:49:34.010 --> 00:49:37.780 LAUGHTER Do you know, like, when the baby starts crying, 1326 00:49:38.079 --> 00:49:40.579 I sometimes don't hear it. She'll just sit up, get up, bang, 1327 00:49:40.599 --> 00:49:42.900 she's on it. Or if Henry's upset, she knows what 1328 00:49:42.940 --> 00:49:46.219 he wants. Like, she's so good at being a mum. And, like, 1329 00:49:46.239 --> 00:49:48.059 she'll sit there and she'll be, I don't know, doing 1330 00:49:48.099 --> 00:49:50.280 a coloring book with Henry. Yeah, she's got one twin there. 1331 00:49:50.300 --> 00:49:53.019 She's just multitasking. Whereas I'm like, oh, I've dropped the 1332 00:49:53.039 --> 00:49:54.969 baby again. Like, obviously I'm not like. 1333 00:49:55.010 --> 00:49:56.829 Yeah, to clear up, you're not actually dropping the babies. 1334 00:49:56.929 --> 00:49:59.489 It's just a bit of fun. Yeah, but, I mean, almost. 1335 00:50:02.210 --> 00:50:03.349 One thing that she does to annoy me. 1336 00:50:04.599 --> 00:50:07.500 probably when Henry wakes up at night sometimes yeah because 1337 00:50:07.539 --> 00:50:10.630 obviously his bedroom is next to our bedroom and he's 1338 00:50:10.670 --> 00:50:14.409 got a little gate on there yeah and I'll sometimes 1339 00:50:14.510 --> 00:50:15.369 open it in the middle of the night so he 1340 00:50:15.389 --> 00:50:17.070 can come in and get a little cuddle yeah because 1341 00:50:17.110 --> 00:50:18.820 I just like have a little cuddle with him because 1342 00:50:18.840 --> 00:50:20.519 remember I wake up three four in the morning so 1343 00:50:20.539 --> 00:50:21.739 like if he wakes up I have a little cuddle 1344 00:50:21.780 --> 00:50:22.719 and I get in the shower and I go to 1345

00:50:22.780 --> 00:50:25.099 work She would hear me go, dink, and she would 1346 00:50:25.179 --> 00:50:27.079 wake up when I'm asleep, like when she's doing the twins, 1347 00:50:27.139 --> 00:50:29.260 and then lock the little gate so he can't come 1348 00:50:29.280 --> 00:50:30.260 in for a little cuddle in the morning. 1349 00:50:30.659 --> 00:50:31.989 That annoys you a little bit, but you can see 1350 00:50:32.030 --> 00:50:32.760 why she's doing it. 1351 00:50:33.030 --> 00:50:35.090 Yeah, she's like, he shouldn't be leaving his bed. 1352 00:50:35.110 --> 00:50:36.829 Well, that's because you piss off at three and she's 1353 00:50:36.849 --> 00:50:38.530 got to sleep with a toddler for hours. 1354 00:50:39.070 --> 00:50:40.889 As she said, she's like, now I've got three kids, 1355 00:50:40.949 --> 00:50:43.010 wide awake, three in the morning, and I've had no sleep. 1356 00:50:44.030 --> 00:50:49.690 And you're in the cafe going, good morning, you lovely people. Tom, 1357 00:50:49.750 --> 00:50:51.269 thanks so much, mate. And good luck with the book 1358 00:50:51.590 --> 00:50:53.269 and everything else. What's the name of the book one 1359 00:50:53.289 --> 00:50:58.800 more time? It's called Graft, How to Smash Life. Abash. Cheers, Tom. 1360 00:50:58.820 --> 00:51:00.239 Have a good one, mate. Have a good day, guys. 1361 00:51:00.260 --> 00:51:00.960 See you later. 1362 00:51:03.400 --> 00:51:04.500 Tom Skinner. 1363 00:51:04.719 --> 00:51:05.030 Abash. 1364 00:51:05.050 --> 00:51:05.889 What a lovely bloke. 1365 00:51:05.909 --> 00:51:06.469 Full of beans. 1366 00:51:07.090 --> 00:51:08.769 He's just so animated, isn't he? 1367 00:51:09.050 --> 00:51:11.250 When he first appeared on The Apprentice, how many tweets 1368 00:51:11.289 --> 00:51:11.809 did you get, Rob? 1369 00:51:12.289 --> 00:51:14.070 Yeah, a lot of people saying it's... But we're actually 1370 00:51:14.090 --> 00:51:16.610 very different in real life. Like, I've got a beard now. Also, 1371 00:51:16.630 --> 00:51:18.349 he's much bigger than me. He's, like, six foot one. 1372 00:51:18.389 --> 00:51:19.150 I'm five foot eight. 1373 00:51:19.170 --> 00:51:22.449 Yeah, you're not having a lasagna at four foot... Four foot. 1374 00:51:22.469 --> 00:51:24.369 Four foot AM. 1375 00:51:24.840 --> 00:51:25.469 Fucking hell. 1376 00:51:26.889 --> 00:51:28.719 He sounds like you need a fucking lasagna at four 1377 00:51:28.739 --> 00:51:29.420 foot AM, mate. 1378 00:51:29.500 --> 00:51:31.219 I should have asked him about lasagna at Christmas, what 1379 00:51:31.239 --> 00:51:31.780 his view was. 1380 00:51:31.800 --> 00:51:33.940 Fuck! Oh, God, yes. Maybe next time. 1381 00:51:34.199 --> 00:51:36.920 But, yeah, buy his book, Tom Skinner. Good luck with 1382 00:51:37.000 --> 00:51:39.639 a graft. Right, see you next week. See you Tuesday. 1383 00:51:40.039 --> 00:51:40.699 See you Tuesday. 1384 00:51:40.780 --> 00:51:41.460 Bye. Bye. Bye. 1385 00:51:46.329 --> 00:51:47.090 Hi, guys. 1386 00:51:47.250 --> 00:51:50.650 Fatih El Ghori here. Quick question, bruv. Do you like 1387 00:51:50.690 --> 00:51:53.969 to laugh? Do you like to give money to good causes? 1388 00:51:54.360 --> 00:51:55.420 Course you do, bruv. 1389 00:51:55.480 --> 00:51:56.239 Course you do. 1390 00:51:56.260 --> 00:51:59.820 Well, listen, on Thursday the 2nd of November at Hackney Empire, 1391 00:52:00.300 --> 00:52:04.039 I'm hosting a comedy night with a star-studded line-up. Heard 1392 00:52:04.079 --> 00:52:09.579 of Rob Beckett, Jack D, Kerry Godleman, Axel Blake, Joanne McNally, 1393 00:52:09.969 --> 00:52:13.340 Harry Hill, Well, yeah, I pulled some strings, didn't I? 1394 00:52:13.610 --> 00:52:15.650 They're all going to be joining me to raise money 1395 00:52:15.710 --> 00:52:19.610 for the British Red Cross, Morocco earthquake and Libya floods appeal. 1396 00:52:19.829 --> 00:52:22.630 It's a win for your dopamine levels and your morals. 1397 00:52:22.989 --> 00:52:25.849 So get your tickets at Hackney Empire or Ticketmaster. 1398 00:52:26.190 --> 00:52:27.530 See you there, innit? 1399 00:52:30.179 --> 00:52:31.519 Hello, I'm Jen Brister. 1400 00:52:31.920 --> 00:52:33.119 And I'm Kerry Godliman. 1401 00:52:33.500 --> 00:52:36.539 And we host the brand new podcast series, Memory Lane. 1402 00:52:37.179 --> 00:52:39.539 Each week, we'll be taking a trip down Memory Lane 1403 00:52:39.800 --> 00:52:42.219 with our very special guests. as they bring in full 1404 00:52:42.260 --> 00:52:43.840 photos from their past to talk about. 1405 00:52:44.179 --> 00:52:47.059 And Jen and I will be doing new episodes every week. 1406 00:52:47.860 --> 00:52:49.840 Come on, we can all be nosy together. 1407 00:52:54.119 --> 00:52:55.900 Memory Lane Podcast, available now. 1408 00:52:56.400 --> 00:53:01.159 Hello, I'm Charles Brandreth. What's the very first thing you remember? 1409 00:53:01.800 --> 00:53:04.829 That's the question I'll be asking my famous and fascinating 1410 00:53:04.889 --> 00:53:09.800 guests in Rosebud. My new podcast about first memories and 1411 00:53:09.920 --> 00:53:11.119 first experiences. 1412 00:53:11.340 --> 00:53:16.739 My first memory is handing my Auntie Muriel a piece 1413 00:53:17.300 --> 00:53:18.360 of turd. 1414 00:53:18.599 --> 00:53:22.920 Other guests include Dame Judi Dench, Alison Hammond and Rory Stewart. 1415 00:53:23.219 --> 00:53:26.219 Download and listen wherever you get your podcasts.

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