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If life made you hard, you can make yourself soft again.
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And that's what Lindsay helps you do.
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That's right.
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Hello, my friend.
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Welcome to the Brilliance Method.
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Today we are hanging out with Lindsay Christian, who is a certified cycle coach, creator of the Burnout Patterns Framework, and host of the She Sacral podcast.
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Her approach weaves rituals, tools, and practices that help women feel safe in their bodies, reclaim their energy, and create lives that naturally nourish them.
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And to get even more out of this episode, be sure to get involved in my podcast community, receive bonus content and more at patreon.com, The Brilliance Method.
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Welcome, Lindsay.
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Hi, darling.
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Hi, I'm so excited to be here.
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What you do is so sacred, so amazing.
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And for everyone listening and watching today, keep an open mind.
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And I think when it comes to burnout, us as women think, you know, we're tough.
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We got this.
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I'm not burning out.
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We don't even realize we're doing it.
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And men too, by the way.
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So, Lindsay, what was the story of you getting so derailed that you pretty much crashed and burned?
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Like what happened?
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Yeah, absolutely.
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So I'll just briefly mention who I was before that derailing.
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Always very confident, like high energy, very much like can-do type of person.
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I actually didn't believe in anything being too hard.
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I believed that we just had to figure out the formula to do it.
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Sounds like a video producer to me.
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We were both video producers in a past life.
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That was always my mentality and just like high energy.
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I could just do whatever I needed to do.
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Sometimes I had some lows prior to that, but that was the state I was in before going into burnout.
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And so during the pandemic, started my podcast.
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No real focus, but it became like a nice little outlet for myself.
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And then after 2020, things started to change uh with work and it became more demanding.
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And the work that I was doing wasn't the work that I loved anymore.
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So instead
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of me doing more of the creative work, it just became just very overwhelming.
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And so during that time, it became And what were you doing?
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Tell everybody what you were doing.
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Sorry, video production.
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Um, but then my role changed from video producer to video producer and social media manager and content creator and all the other things that come with each job.
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And so in that, I was like, you know what?
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Maybe I can start to work for myself.
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And so entrepreneurship was like kind of booming around this time, like 2022.
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People were like, I'm making$10,000,$20,000 a month.
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And I'm like, man, what am I doing?
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So um with that, you know what?
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I've got this big audience uh with my podcast that I've poured the last four years into.
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Surely I can make this into a business.
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Yeah.
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So started to do the whole business thing, but I was still working.
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So a lot of the time that I would have to recharge and um kind of come back to myself, that time was getting smaller and smaller.
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On top of that, life is still lifing, it's still happening.
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And so challenges, family, new relationships, just a lot of different changes all happening at once.
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And it just started to become really, really overwhelming where I would normally maybe take a little day trip or pamper myself or do certain things that would kind of keep me balanced.
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That was just not happening anymore.
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And so then it got to a point where I was like, you know what?
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I just need to work remotely.
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So I got a new job, left that job.
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I was with, I was there for like six years.
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So got a new job, was there for nine months, got laid off.
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There goes more of the burnout because now I'm in very much like a fight mode of trying to like get my business going, but I still don't know what I'm doing.
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And then family members are are falling sick.
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And so it just became this storm of what is going on?
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Am I ever gonna get out of this?
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And so my sleep started to get disrupted, and I noticed my body wasn't responding the way that it used to.
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I was used to having like a really high metabolism, and within like a just a few months, I gained like almost 30 pounds and I couldn't get it off.
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I was like trying to work out like crazy, cutting back what I was eating, and I I just felt miserable.
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I didn't know what to do as I'd never experienced that before.
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That just felt very odd.
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So it got to a point where I was spending close to about$700 a month on my health just to try to get my body back.
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And that made like a slight dent.
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And if I missed some appointments for all the different things I was doing, I would fall right back into it.
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So with that, I've been going to the doctors.
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They can't really help me.
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The most they can do is like, hey, you could try birth control.
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I'm like, yeah, no, that's not, that's not gonna fix any of the problems that I'm having right now.
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Um, but okay, thanks.
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I'll figure it out myself.
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And so I just started to pour a lot of energy into research and learning how the body actually works, and then slowly but surely started to heal myself.
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But the number one way I was really able to do that was by turning towards more intentional, pleasurable experiences, just making sure that I'm actually feeling good.
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So most of the time we try to fight our way out of burnout with cutting out more food and exercising more excessively.
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And so I was like, you know what?
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What if we just have fun with our workouts?
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What if we just do some hula hooping or some dancing or just do things that just feel nice instead of trying to go to the gym?
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And that's what I did.
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And I noticed that my body was actually reacting to that a lot easier.
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And I started eating foods that were nourishing my body, but also giving me that little high at the same time.
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And um, so I noticed that was actually what worked, and it got me to relax.
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I no longer have heart palpitations in the middle of the night where I felt like on edge, and like that whole thing was just so weird.
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I never experienced that before, but I was there for like three years, and it was really scary because I didn't know what to do.
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So now I'm back, and so I'm happy to share everything that I've learned and then some with women that could be in the same position.
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Wow.
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Thank you for sharing that, sweetheart.
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And it's so interesting.
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The answer was there the whole time because in your story, you said I was working full time and then I started building my business.
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So all the things I used to do for fun, I stopped doing because I was building this business.
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Right.
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So the second you stopped the pleasurable activities, you stopped having fun, right?
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Your cortisol levels are spiking, it's messing with your hormones.
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You know more about that than I do, and we'll talk a little bit more about that on today's show, too.
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But it was there the whole time, right?
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You just abandoned this one thing that's so critical, not just in our mental health, but in our physical health.
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And if you, honey, if you could have done it better, you would have.
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And and you know what?
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Now you get to be here and be so grateful and give yourself peace and joy and inspire others to do the same.
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So I'm sorry you went through that.
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And I'm so grateful that you're using it as a teaching platform.
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Absolutely.
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Well, thank you for holding space to share.
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Hopefully, it was not too overwhelming, but I'm I'm definitely happy to be here.
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I'm so glad.
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You know, with everything that you've been through, and so many of my listeners and patrons are in the entertainment industry or in creative industries or even in the coaching industry, they think, I know you guys are thinking this, that I don't have time to put myself first or go play or any of that stuff.
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In fact, I was on a coaching call yesterday, and my client was saying, well, she wants to create a podcast and she wants to do these other, she wants to do a YouTube channel and all this stuff.
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And she goes, but all that feels really fun.
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So I can't do that until I set up my website and start getting clients and da-da-da-da-da.
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I have to do all this stuff first.
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And I was like, record scratch, right?
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Like, er, what did you do?
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Like, what?
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She's like, I need to make money.
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And I'm like, whoa.
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I'm like, the universe has a secret, which is the more fun you have, the more money you make.
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Yes.
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Can you talk to us about that?
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Absolutely.
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There is science behind it for those that are pretty skeptical.
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But when you're in states of chronic stress, your nervous system tenses up, right?
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So you're you don't even realize it, but you're in a state of bracing.
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So when you're in the state of bracing and you're really tight, your energy is also tight.
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And so if you ever notice, sometimes if you're just relaxed and you're like not focused on the thing that you're stressed out, sometimes you notice things just suddenly magically happen.
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Where something comes through, or a new client comes in, or you get a magic little payment.
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Something just comes through.
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And that's because our nervous system is now in a relaxed state.
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It's not in survival mode, and we're actually aligned with our true selves.
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And that is always built for openness and receiving.
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So we're in a receiving state.
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And sometimes when we've been holding a lot in and we put ourselves in a receiving state, everything also gets released.
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So you may notice more emotions come up when you're in an open state as well.
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And sometimes we're like, oh, I don't have time to feel.
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I got to get this thing done.
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So you tense up more.
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And so it kind of creates this vicious cycle that you're like, ah, forget it.
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And then you get to surrender eventually because you just can't continue like that anymore.
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That's right.
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Yeah.
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And what you said about receiving is key.
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And especially for women, we don't realize that we are divine receivers.
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And I learned this from Andrea Quinn, who I think I connected you with.
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I was like, I think you guys need to be friends because she talks so much about receiving.
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Like when you think of Brene Brown and you think of vulnerability, right?
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And there's so many people you think of a what gay Hendricks, you think of Zone of Genius.
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Andrea Quinn, you think of receiving.
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And you guys are gonna be great friends.
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I just know it.
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And something I learned from her is as the divine feminine, as a as you know, someone who is chosen to be born into this body or or you know, you're here as a female.
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Your job is to receive in order to create, even if you
don't have children.
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Right.
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And Andre always says, if you can't receive it, it's not coming.
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And so much of what you just said is connected to that allowingness of receiving that helps you to create your life with joy and peace and purpose.
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I just hope everybody is taking copious notes and you listen to this over and over again, and you go to She Sacral and you get involved in what Lindsay is doing and offering, and you listen to her podcast because this is this is like urgent for women right now.
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And look, we're the ones who are gonna help take over this world and save this world.
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Like we're trying, right?
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But we're not gonna do it from burning out and marching and fighting.
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We're gonna do it by allowing and receiving and enjoying.
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It's like anybody who's been in production, anybody who has kids, any, any, any woman has to get involved in this conversation and just accept that it's the truth.
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Yes.
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Absolutely.
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And preaching to the choir.
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There, and sometimes we have uh old wounds that we don't realize that are blocking us from receiving, you know.
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Um, sometimes we've had some tricks that came with receiving that taught our bodies that it's not safe to receive, that came with some obligation or some strings attached, or something bad happened when I received or allowed someone in.
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And that's the part that we have to work with.
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But when we learn how to give to ourselves and prioritize ourselves, that will teach our nervous system that it is okay to start receiving.
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For a lot of women, receiving is one of the hardest things that they ever learn.
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And, you know, even this morning I met someone and I was like just so in awe of how beautiful she was.
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I've talked to her on the phone, and she's my friend who passed away, it's his sister.
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And I was sitting next to her, she came over this morning, and I'd never met her before.
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And I just couldn't stop looking at how beautiful she was.
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And I was like, You're so beautiful.
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And she just went, Thank you.
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And I laughed and I was like, Did somebody teach you that?
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She goes, Yes.
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Like, you did really well.
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And she goes, Thank you.
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It was so cute.
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Can you help us to get into a practice of receiving a little bit?
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What do we start to do?
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Because you just mentioned sometimes we've been traumatized or we've been hurt or we don't trust ourselves or we think it's not okay to let it land.
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What can we do to start shifting that?
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Well, first we want to kind of recognize when those opportunities come up.
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And to start with the small stuff, I think that's most important because I learned this a few years back, which is like if you can't even receive a compliment, which is the simplest form of a gift, how do you expect to receive the big stuff?
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And so the first step is like when you receive something small, and we receive all the time, we just don't recognize it.
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Rather, someone holds the door open for you or they give you a compliment or whatever, not pushing it away or deflecting, or like, yeah, well, this thing is old, or no, just say thank you.
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And sometimes it's like, well, maybe I don't go out or I'm not, you know, interacting with a lot of people.
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Focus on nature.
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The sun is always the source for helping us and supporting us.
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And so just sitting out there and sitting out there with the intention of, I'm receiving the energy that the sun is giving me right now.
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Just starting to activate, okay, let me start to see what is already here and receive from what's already here.
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Because sometimes we'll start thinking, oh, do I need to demand for people to give me stuff?
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Or like our brains will kind of go there to try to justify why we shouldn't receive.
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So start really small or wherever you feel most comfortable with what you already have.
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Um, so if you have pets, allow for them to love on you.
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If you have a partner, let them help you out.
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Sometimes we kind of get trapped in hyper independence.
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For many, I was one of those, like for the longest time.
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I'm like, nope, I got it, I got it.
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Because I experience having the rug pulled out from underneath me when I was dependent on other people.
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And so those things happen and it teaches the body like that's not safe.
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So we have to start retraining our system on what is safe.
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So that's one small, I like to start small first and then grow from there.
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I love that.
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Yeah, I don't I don't think about the sun as much.
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I always think about the moon.
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Oh you know, what can I receive from the moon?
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I swim a lot at night.
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Oh, nice.
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And I look up at the moon, I'm like, is it a new moon?
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Are we birthing new creations?
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Is it a full moon?
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Are we gonna start letting go soon?
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But I love the idea of receiving from the sun.
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Yes, it's like the whole earth is receiving from the sun.
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It's right there.
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We get to just receive a breath right now.
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Yeah.
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Everyone listening just took a nice deep breath with us.
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I know it.
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I mentioned before that some people don't realize they're on the brink of burnout.
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Cause, like you said, like this, you know, I'm just gonna get through it.
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I'm strong.
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This isn't hard.
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This isn't a problem.
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I'm just gonna go, go, go.
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We've trained our minds and bodies to just get through it.
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So, how do we even know?
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Are there signs that show us we're on the brink of burnout that we can start to pay attention to?
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Absolutely.
00:17:25.519 --> 00:17:42.319
So I've actually designed kind of a group of about eight different types of burnout patterns, but essentially they are a combination of your fears, your motivations, what's driving you, and then also your coping mechanism.
00:17:42.480 --> 00:17:45.920
So I'll focus on the coping mechanisms, which we all have.
00:17:46.000 --> 00:17:47.680
It's built into every living being.
00:17:47.839 --> 00:17:55.039
We all have a survival coping mechanism, which is gonna be freeze, fight, flight, or fawn.
00:17:55.680 --> 00:18:08.000
So you'll notice that at times when you're experiencing stress, sometimes you may not notice because you're so used to it, but you'll notice in times of stress, you'll react in one of those ways.
00:18:08.160 --> 00:18:16.559
You're either gonna freeze, I'm a big freezer, I literally even get cold, or I'll just kind of like it's annoying.
00:18:16.720 --> 00:18:57.359
But you'll freeze, or you'll fight where you're trying to prove, or you're trying to push through, or you might start little arguments or being overly sarcastic, or you'll fawn where you'll people please your way out of the situation, or try to smooth things over, or overgive and undercharge, things like that, or you'll flight where you are trying to get away from the situation, but you might do
it by trying to distract yourself, procrastinating, or you can even do it by over-planning or over-analyzing a situation where you kind of become more disconnected from your body because you're living in your head so much.
00:18:57.599 --> 00:19:15.440
So if you can start recognizing what that pattern is, you can start recognizing when you start utilizing those stress patterns, that's gonna be your cue to let you know, okay, we can either stay in survival or we can start to shift things.
00:19:15.599 --> 00:19:17.279
So the first step is awareness.
00:19:17.440 --> 00:19:20.559
And I really figure out what your unique pattern is.
00:19:20.720 --> 00:19:22.079
I've created like a whole quiz.
00:19:22.160 --> 00:19:36.960
It's really short, it's only like a couple minutes, but that will help you just kind of figure out where that burnout loop comes from, especially if you notice that you've changed jobs, you've changed relationships, you've changed a whole bunch, but the outcome stays the same.
00:19:37.200 --> 00:19:45.759
There's an unconscious pattern that's in your nervous system that you don't realize is there that's driving that burnout cycle.
00:19:46.960 --> 00:19:50.400
So those are some of the patterns that can come up.
00:19:50.720 --> 00:20:08.000
And a lot of times it's hard to recognize, especially if you grew up in like really chaotic environments or survival modes at home or a lot of instability where your stress system was kicked in at an early age.
00:20:08.079 --> 00:20:16.640
And so over time, if you can had to continuously activate that survival pattern, it can actually reshape your personality.
00:20:16.880 --> 00:20:25.680
So some of us have it so ingrained that we don't realize that we are activating or acting out from our survival version of ourselves.
00:20:25.839 --> 00:20:30.400
We don't realize that there's like a whole different version of who we're really designed to be.
00:20:30.559 --> 00:20:38.640
And that's that version is the one that allows for you to receive all of the abundance and the things that you desire.
00:20:38.799 --> 00:20:45.680
But many of us have been so wrapped up in survival mode, we can't, it's hard to overcome that at times.
00:20:45.920 --> 00:20:54.960
Gosh, and isn't it incredible to think that that true version of us, who we were always meant to be, who maybe we used to be.
00:20:55.920 --> 00:21:09.359
There were glimpses of who we used to be, is still there and is ready to play and explore and be seen and fall in love and go on adventures and write and create and enjoy your life.
00:21:09.680 --> 00:21:13.839
And you guys, it doesn't have to be so hard.
00:21:14.720 --> 00:21:18.640
I know we just want to take everyone in love.
00:21:22.160 --> 00:21:23.759
I know, I know.
00:21:24.160 --> 00:21:35.119
But when you're like so wrapped up in it and your body's like, we gotta survive, I mean, it's like you it's so hard to even think differently because you can't relax.
00:21:35.519 --> 00:21:41.599
So that's why it's so important to at least have the awareness, so then you can start to shift it.
00:21:41.759 --> 00:21:47.039
Because if you're not aware, you're just gonna keep creating these loops and not know why it's happening.
00:21:47.359 --> 00:21:48.160
That's right.
00:21:48.400 --> 00:21:51.680
And all of us have been through unbelievable stuff.
00:21:51.839 --> 00:21:56.160
And I've had people say to me, you know, I don't think I I've actually had a really blessed life.
00:21:56.319 --> 00:21:59.759
I haven't, you know, nobody abused me or I wasn't cheated on.
00:22:00.319 --> 00:22:03.279
Or, you know, I didn't have this disorder or this disorder.
00:22:03.359 --> 00:22:05.039
Like I've got a pretty blessed life.
00:22:05.119 --> 00:22:28.640
And it's like nine times out of ten, or like nine and a half times, nine point nine times out of ten, they're just really good at coping and not realizing that something really hurt them or affected them, even if it was like getting bullied or you know, things that we tend to just think, oh, this is just normal because kids are jerks or or whatnot.
00:22:28.799 --> 00:22:36.880
It's like actually, we're all sensitive beings and our our pain threshold is all different.
00:22:36.960 --> 00:22:48.079
And depending on who raised you or who your dominant parent was, or what maybe you watched or read, you think that you just are supposed to grin and bear it, and this is normal.
00:22:48.240 --> 00:22:59.039
And, you know, I'm not going towards like that everyone gets a trophy type of mentality, but we are all sensitive and unique and lovely and brilliant.
00:22:59.119 --> 00:23:02.640
And we do deserve to be loved and held, especially by ourselves.
00:23:03.759 --> 00:23:21.519
So I encourage everyone to be willing to look at their stuff and go, yeah, actually, you know what, you know when I noticed it, Lindsay, is when the other day I was playing back a reading that I had with my astrologer.
00:23:22.480 --> 00:23:25.759
And we got into a conversation about cults.
00:23:26.640 --> 00:23:29.200
And I said, Oh yeah, my dad was in a cult.
00:23:29.440 --> 00:23:32.240
And my mother protected us from that, and I wasn't in it.
00:23:32.319 --> 00:23:40.000
But the cult used to try to kidnap me, and they would show up at my house, they would break into my house, they tried to kidnap me twice.
00:23:40.160 --> 00:23:46.160
When they found out I was a vegetarian, they would leave dead animals on my doorstep, like that face, right?
00:23:46.319 --> 00:23:50.240
And so I'm just telling this story, like, oh yeah, that was just like my upbringing.
00:23:50.319 --> 00:23:56.559
Like, but I think of so many other awful things that I had been through that, like at this point in life, like that's not a big deal.
00:23:56.640 --> 00:24:06.640
And anyhow, I was listening to this replay of this recording because I was trying to find certain astrological dates from their astrology reading, and we just had
this sidebar conversation.
00:24:06.799 --> 00:24:08.960
His name's Jade Luna, he's amazing, by the way.
00:24:09.119 --> 00:24:11.920
And he's been on this show twice, if you want to go back and look.
00:24:12.240 --> 00:24:19.680
And my friend was in the kitchen and she goes, Alicia, pause your computer.
00:24:20.240 --> 00:24:20.960
I was like, What?
00:24:21.039 --> 00:24:27.039
And she goes, Oh my gosh, like you went, I thought I knew all the terrible things you you went through.
00:24:27.119 --> 00:24:29.359
That and I was like, Yeah.
00:24:29.599 --> 00:24:37.359
And then I had this moment, Lindsay, that we're talking about right now of like, yeah, it was just some like awful thing that I went through, but like I got through it.
00:24:37.440 --> 00:24:38.319
And it's like, did you?
00:24:38.480 --> 00:24:44.480
Like, you also got breast cancer, you had an eating disorder, you were in terrible relationships.
00:24:44.640 --> 00:24:49.039
Like, Alicia, did you really like how well did you just smooth through that one?
00:24:49.119 --> 00:24:57.440
No, it was like years of undoing, years of telling myself I'm safe in my own home and my body, I'm safe to have pets.
00:24:57.599 --> 00:25:02.480
Like, even now, the my husband and I fight more than anything about our pets, of the safety of our pets.
00:25:03.200 --> 00:25:07.039
I'm like, oh my gosh, like I think I'm even realizing this as I'm talking to you now, Lindsay.
00:25:07.119 --> 00:25:08.960
This is how safe of a space she is, you guys.
00:25:09.519 --> 00:25:12.319
Like that comes from that, right?
00:25:13.039 --> 00:25:19.119
Like we have all this stuff that we just think, oh, I just got like this is just life, and you just get through it.
00:25:19.359 --> 00:25:24.319
And if life made you hard, you can make yourself soft again.
00:25:24.400 --> 00:25:26.000
And that's what Lindsay helps you do.
00:25:26.240 --> 00:25:26.960
That's right.
00:25:27.119 --> 00:25:27.839
Absolutely.
00:25:28.079 --> 00:25:37.680
So, another thing that you do, sweetheart, that's so connected to what I just talked about is healing burnout through pleasure and redefining recovery through nervous system repair.
00:25:37.759 --> 00:25:40.160
Cause that that's a big part of it, right?
00:25:40.240 --> 00:25:42.400
And a lot of people are talking about the nervous system right now.
00:25:42.480 --> 00:25:44.960
And I think it's there's a time to talk about it.
00:25:45.680 --> 00:25:46.720
And pleasure.
00:25:46.960 --> 00:25:48.559
Sacred pleasure.
00:25:49.680 --> 00:25:51.359
I'm just gonna hand you the mic.
00:25:51.680 --> 00:25:52.000
Okay.
00:25:53.519 --> 00:26:10.640
Well, I definitely want to make a distinction on what sacred pleasure is and what that means, because a lot of times we already have a kind of a belief of what we think pleasure is, and sometimes we think, oh, just immoderation, or it's overindulgent, or it's bad, or whatever.
00:26:10.880 --> 00:26:22.960
And we can have shadow pleasure, which is, you know, the drinking, the binging on whatever, the sugar, whatever it is that's gonna deteriorate your body, right?
00:26:23.200 --> 00:26:25.759
So those would be shadowy forms of pleasure.
00:26:25.839 --> 00:26:28.880
There's always a shadow and a light in everything.
00:26:29.039 --> 00:26:36.000
But the sacred pleasure is really about being intentional about how you want to feel good.
00:26:36.480 --> 00:26:38.880
And so I'll give you an example the other day.
00:26:39.039 --> 00:26:44.240
And this is gonna take a little time if you've been disconnected from yourself for a while.
00:26:44.400 --> 00:26:51.279
But if you can just pay attention a little bit more, you'll be able to actually work with your body's natural system.
00:26:51.519 --> 00:26:57.759
So your your body's design, your nervous system is designed to either get away from pain and move towards pleasure.
00:26:57.839 --> 00:26:58.960
So it's got two modes.
00:26:59.119 --> 00:27:02.079
So it activates pleasure regardless.
00:27:02.319 --> 00:27:07.279
So when you feel angry or you feel upset, your body releases endorphins when you feel pain.
00:27:07.440 --> 00:27:11.039
So it's the body's natural way of healing itself.
00:27:11.200 --> 00:27:20.319
But if we can be intentional about the way we use pleasure, that's gonna put you in a state of healing instead of this like loop pattern.
00:27:20.960 --> 00:27:32.559
So, an example I have is a couple of uh weeks ago, I just felt this craving of I wanted to go somewhere old.
00:27:32.960 --> 00:27:36.720
Like I wanted to smell old smells.
00:27:37.039 --> 00:27:41.839
And I was like, but I want to go somewhere where I actually know someone.
00:27:42.000 --> 00:27:49.440
Like in my mind, I'm like, I wish I could go to like a friend's old mom and pop store, but that didn't exist.
00:27:49.759 --> 00:27:52.640
So, but that was like a craving I had.
00:27:52.720 --> 00:27:54.559
I was like, why am I craving that right now?
00:27:54.720 --> 00:28:00.960
So I actually just decided to go visit my dad, who's actually he's um going through chemo right now.
00:28:01.119 --> 00:28:12.079
So I went to go see my dad, and that was a space that has all those old smells and reminders of childhood memories and all of that good stuff.
00:28:12.400 --> 00:28:14.799
And after I left, I felt great.
00:28:14.960 --> 00:28:16.559
What was the science behind that?
00:28:16.799 --> 00:28:30.319
It that like nostalgia or even trying new things can boost dopamine, and so I didn't realize it, but that part of my pleasure chemistry was low.
00:28:30.799 --> 00:28:36.000
But a lot of times we'll just override our thoughts and be, oh, that's weird.
00:28:36.160 --> 00:28:38.000
I don't know, why would I think that?
00:28:38.160 --> 00:28:45.119
And we'll just kind of go right back into whatever we're doing that's not helping our bodies heal.
00:28:45.279 --> 00:28:57.359
And so it really starts from taking time to listen to yourself and
just kind of exploring those ideas or hunches or thoughts that come up versus shutting them down.
00:28:57.599 --> 00:28:58.960
So that's kind of the first step.
00:28:59.119 --> 00:29:18.880
Like if we have cravings for something or we're just kind of having this desire to do a certain thing, it's probably a clue that your body is really trying to regulate itself and not to overthink it too much or like get stuck in your head that it's weird or it doesn't make sense or it doesn't fit in your day.
00:29:19.599 --> 00:29:19.839
Yeah.
00:29:20.000 --> 00:29:26.160
And people tend to think intuition has to be psychic stuff or, you know, woo-woo.
00:29:26.319 --> 00:29:31.759
And truly, it's our sense that our body is telling us what we need.
00:29:31.920 --> 00:29:37.359
You know, it's like even if you're craving, you might be craving an orange, and it's like, oh, you just need some vitamin C.
00:29:37.440 --> 00:29:40.640
Like your vitamin C might be low, or you're craving going outside.
00:29:40.799 --> 00:29:44.880
Okay, well, you know, you need that hit from the sun, like you're talking about.
00:29:45.119 --> 00:29:54.480
So it's just about listening to ourselves and knowing we're safe to do that, choosing to do it, remembering that we have the choice to do it.
00:29:54.559 --> 00:29:56.319
Like we keep backing it up, backing it up.
00:29:56.400 --> 00:29:59.200
It's like, oh, wait, I have another choice.
00:29:59.359 --> 00:30:06.559
I can pause, you know, unless you are literally like hosing water on a burning fire, you have a second.
00:30:07.119 --> 00:30:08.960
Yes, absolutely.
00:30:09.359 --> 00:30:19.680
So that's that's kind of the first step that I would take in in whatever situation, because it could be different for maybe there's not a stressful trigger, but you just have a craving for something.
00:30:19.920 --> 00:30:22.079
I just have a couple little practices.
00:30:22.240 --> 00:30:27.599
I jot it down in case if you find yourself into some of those survival patterns.
00:30:27.759 --> 00:30:37.119
So if you notice that you're ready to like pick a fight, you're feeling really annoyed, or you're feeling super irritable, or you're not even maybe, maybe you're not angry.
00:30:37.279 --> 00:30:43.039
Maybe you're just trying to like push really hard for something, you're most likely in the fight mode.
00:30:43.279 --> 00:30:52.240
And so that is kind of like the default survival mode, but it does have some power behind it, which is going to be like setting boundaries and leadership.
00:30:52.319 --> 00:31:06.079
And sometimes there is a time and place for fight, but some things that you can do, rage rituals where you kind of just scream into like a towel or just kind of get that energy out.
00:31:06.160 --> 00:31:10.000
It's an abundance of fiery energy that you may be having.
00:31:10.240 --> 00:31:18.000
Sometimes what I like to do is if I feel really angry about something, I'll write it all out and then I'll burn it and just kind of watch it burn.
00:31:18.079 --> 00:31:25.039
And even smelling the smoke of the fire can actually be very soothing for the nervous system during that time as well.
00:31:25.200 --> 00:31:29.599
Of course, if it's not too smoky, like please don't like smoke yourself out, please.
00:31:29.839 --> 00:31:31.359
Nobody burn your house down, okay?
00:31:32.480 --> 00:31:34.160
Let's not like come on, guys.
00:31:34.240 --> 00:31:34.799
Let's right.
00:31:34.880 --> 00:31:37.680
And you know, some safe ways that's one of my favorite ways, too.
00:31:37.759 --> 00:31:39.519
I'm very, you know, kind of witchy about it.
00:31:39.680 --> 00:31:53.359
But I'll even just I have a metal sink, so I'll even just like have the water going really slow on one end of the sink at front of the faucet, and then just like burnt that should burn it, and then like as it's burning, the flame gets a little high, just bring this faucet over.
00:31:53.680 --> 00:31:55.440
Okay, so do this mindfully.
00:31:55.519 --> 00:31:56.480
But yeah, those are great.
00:31:56.559 --> 00:31:57.359
What else you got?
00:31:57.519 --> 00:32:04.000
Yeah, or you can also do some more cardio or some good higher energy dancing exercises as well.
00:32:04.079 --> 00:32:08.319
So if you want to just like get some energy out, that's really good if you're in that flight mode.
00:32:08.559 --> 00:32:15.839
If you find yourself kind of overthinking or rushing or getting really panicky, then you're likely in flight mode.
00:32:16.079 --> 00:32:26.720
Power behind flight mode is that it can help you with movement, it can help you with innovation, it can help you with kind of creating some future thoughts and preparing for the future.
00:32:26.799 --> 00:32:35.440
So it has some advantages, but if you notice that it's in response to like stress, some things you can do is um just some more grounding rituals.
00:32:35.680 --> 00:32:40.400
So getting your feet on the ground outside, that can help.
00:32:40.559 --> 00:32:44.000
I'm using a weighted blanket, just kind of weighing the body down.
00:32:44.160 --> 00:32:48.480
That's gonna help bring you back to center as much as possible.
00:32:48.720 --> 00:32:52.160
You can even just kind of ask yourself, what am I avoiding right now?
00:32:52.319 --> 00:32:54.319
Like what am I trying to get away from?
00:32:54.480 --> 00:33:00.480
And just be honest and recognize what that feeling is trying to tell you.
00:33:01.519 --> 00:33:11.039
If you notice that you're going into people-pleasing and over-accommodating and approval seeking, then you're likely in fawn mode.
00:33:11.279 --> 00:33:18.799
Of course, the light side of fawn is like compassion and empathy and you know, sacred service, things like that.
00:33:18.960 --> 00:33:21.359
So it has some good strengths as well.
00:33:21.440 --> 00:33:26.000
But if we find that we're in fawn, some things we could do.
00:33:27.599 --> 00:33:29.759
Um, covering my face right now.
00:33:29.839 --> 00:33:30.400
That's my thing.
00:33:30.720 --> 00:33:34.079
That was my thing, and that actually led me into burnout as well.
00:33:34.240 --> 00:33:47.279
Because I was like times where I probably could have charged appropriately and made more money so I didn't have to work as hard and stay stuck in burnout, I was stuck in fawn mode because I was in a space of survival.
00:33:47.519 --> 00:33:49.279
So it happens, it's okay.
00:33:49.440 --> 00:33:49.839
Yeah, yeah.
00:33:49.920 --> 00:33:52.000
I'm good, I'm pretty good at charging my worth.
00:33:52.160 --> 00:33:58.319
I just sometimes, if I think I've upset someone, and this goes back to a trauma response.
00:33:58.480 --> 00:34:02.319
If I think anyone's upset with me, like my whole world shuts down.
00:34:02.640 --> 00:34:04.559
And it's all I can focus on.
00:34:04.720 --> 00:34:05.599
I want to make things better.
00:34:05.680 --> 00:34:07.599
And like I just might be even in my head about it.
00:34:07.759 --> 00:34:09.440
So, like, the are you okay?
00:34:09.760 --> 00:34:10.960
Is everyone else okay?
00:34:11.119 --> 00:34:11.920
It's what is it?
00:34:12.000 --> 00:34:15.199
It's a distraction of no, Alicia, you know who's not okay?
00:34:15.519 --> 00:34:16.880
Look in the mirror.
00:34:17.199 --> 00:34:19.039
Let's ask you, are you okay?
00:34:19.679 --> 00:34:20.960
All right, back to the expert.
00:34:21.199 --> 00:34:26.880
No, no, and what we don't realize a lot of times is we actually end up doing self-abandonment.
00:34:27.039 --> 00:34:35.519
So we're so focused on being there for everyone else, but like the irony is that we're losing low loyalty towards ourselves.
00:34:35.679 --> 00:34:41.840
So you can't be loyal to everything and be loyal to yourself at the same time when they're not aligned.
00:34:42.000 --> 00:34:43.519
So do remember that.
00:34:45.119 --> 00:34:56.639
So mirror work is really powerful, just taking a moment to really look at yourself and recognize that you matter and affirm your worth on a regular basis.
00:34:56.800 --> 00:35:02.000
And I did that during a time where I needed to heal and it did actually start shifting things for me.
00:35:02.079 --> 00:35:03.199
It's hard to do at first.
00:35:03.280 --> 00:35:06.000
Like the very first time I did it, I was like, this feels weird.
00:35:06.239 --> 00:35:09.679
Or man, I never really took the time to really look at myself.
00:35:09.920 --> 00:35:11.679
So that's something that you could do.
00:35:11.840 --> 00:35:15.920
You can also practice a lot of times we hold a lot in, we don't speak.
00:35:16.559 --> 00:35:28.559
So you can even do some humming, and that will reset your vagus nerve, which is kind of like the biggest nerve of a nervous system, which starts here, and that will actually reset your digestion.
00:35:28.719 --> 00:35:30.480
So I do it right now, yeah.
00:35:30.639 --> 00:35:40.000
So you can just and you can actually just feel the vibration too.
00:35:40.079 --> 00:35:50.880
Just I know I'm trying
to make a song out of it.
00:35:51.360 --> 00:35:52.639
Come with us, everybody.
00:35:52.960 --> 00:35:53.920
Come with us.
00:35:57.360 --> 00:35:59.119
So, what's happening with the vagus nerve?
00:35:59.199 --> 00:36:00.320
What is the vagus nerve?
00:36:00.559 --> 00:36:09.039
The vagus nerve is the largest nerve in your nervous system, and it starts all the way from your throat and goes all the way down to your digestive system.
00:36:09.280 --> 00:36:17.519
So sometimes if you notice, if you feel really anxious, your stomach kind of gets up in knots and it gets really um flippy or something like that.
00:36:17.840 --> 00:36:19.840
That will actually reset that.
00:36:20.480 --> 00:36:30.480
And so sometimes you may notice, even unconsciously, if you feel a little stressed, you might hum a little song or you might do that and not realize that you're doing it.
00:36:30.639 --> 00:36:36.480
Or you can do some deep breathing that also reactivates or resets the vagus nerve as well.
00:36:36.960 --> 00:36:47.360
So a lot of times when people have trouble with speaking out and activating that throat chakra, they'll notice they'll have digestive issues too.
00:36:47.440 --> 00:36:49.199
So it's all connected.
00:36:49.519 --> 00:36:50.079
I love that.
00:36:50.239 --> 00:36:54.960
So whenever I do a coaching container, I focus on the chakra.
00:36:55.039 --> 00:37:00.480
And I just wrapped up the Emerald Collective on the heart chakra, and now we're doing the sapphire collective for the throat chakra.
00:37:00.719 --> 00:37:01.039
Nice.
00:37:01.519 --> 00:37:03.519
Yeah, to just like expand, get that out.
00:37:03.599 --> 00:37:06.400
So I didn't even know that it was connected to the vagus nerve.
00:37:06.480 --> 00:37:13.199
And even when knowing the name of your rebrand of she sacral, I was like, yes, this makes so much sense with our sacral chakra.
00:37:13.280 --> 00:37:13.920
And that's right.
00:37:14.079 --> 00:37:16.960
I know you know a lot about chakras, and my audience loves them.
00:37:17.199 --> 00:37:19.039
So, or at least they're learning too.
00:37:19.280 --> 00:37:19.440
Yeah.
00:37:19.679 --> 00:37:20.639
Good, good, good.
00:37:21.280 --> 00:37:25.360
So that's what they could do if you notice yourself kind of over pleasing.
00:37:25.440 --> 00:37:29.840
Just come back to yourself and really ask, what do I need right now?
00:37:30.079 --> 00:37:34.400
What is something that is going to take care of me in this moment?
00:37:34.719 --> 00:37:37.920
And also pausing before you react.
00:37:38.320 --> 00:37:40.320
Pausing before you ask, are you okay?
00:37:40.480 --> 00:37:42.000
Really ask, what did I do?
00:37:42.079 --> 00:37:43.920
Like, did I really do something wrong?
00:37:44.159 --> 00:37:49.280
Or if somebody asks you for something, don't react and say yes right away.
00:37:49.440 --> 00:37:51.119
Take a moment and look at my schedule.
00:37:51.199 --> 00:37:51.840
I'll get back to you.
00:37:52.000 --> 00:37:53.840
So it just depends on the situation.
00:37:54.000 --> 00:37:56.000
But those are things you could do.
00:37:56.239 --> 00:38:00.159
That that last thing you said, that's been a big one in my life that's helped me so much.
00:38:00.400 --> 00:38:00.719
Really?
00:38:00.960 --> 00:38:07.840
Especially in yeah, in knowing like when someone is upset or if I think they're upset, I pause and I go, are they actually upset?
00:38:07.920 --> 00:38:14.639
And the amount that I'm reacting to it, go, how much of this is real and how much of this is like 12-year-old Alicia that was traumatized.
00:38:15.199 --> 00:38:15.599
Right.
00:38:15.920 --> 00:38:17.199
So that's key.
00:38:17.360 --> 00:38:18.400
Just pause and sit.
00:38:18.480 --> 00:38:22.079
There's a Pearl Jam song called Don't React, Respond.
00:38:22.480 --> 00:38:22.960
Yes.
00:38:23.199 --> 00:38:24.320
And I love that song.
00:38:24.559 --> 00:38:35.360
It's so helpful, especially when you have tried to learn how to navigate chaos through keeping the waters calm as much as possible.
00:38:35.519 --> 00:38:42.320
Even though you're holding all this fire in and you're just taking it all and it's eating away at you, it is affecting you.
00:38:42.559 --> 00:38:44.559
We want to make sure that we're keeping balance.
00:38:44.880 --> 00:38:46.559
So that's important.
00:38:46.800 --> 00:38:50.079
And then freeze for my freezers out there.
00:38:50.320 --> 00:38:53.039
You literally want to warm up your body as much as possible.
00:38:53.119 --> 00:39:00.239
So even just like warming up your hands, you'll oftentimes dissociate from your body when you are in freeze mode.
00:39:00.480 --> 00:39:07.360
So you might live in your mind a whole lot more, but your body is still here, or you might just feel like just stuck.
00:39:07.599 --> 00:39:19.440
Sometimes timers are really helpful just to create a little bit of urgency to snap you out of those moments, getting your hands in some like warm water as well, and just kind of waking the body up.
00:39:19.599 --> 00:39:34.800
So we want to get into kind of wake mode, wake up mode, and then kind of shaking the body a little bit, just kind of do a little, a little shake, a little shoulder shake that can also help reset the body because what we don't realize is all animals in the wild go through these survival patterns.
00:39:35.119 --> 00:39:36.159
I was thinking that.
00:39:36.960 --> 00:39:41.280
Yeah, so many times I'm like, wait, my dog, everything you've said of like my dog naturally does that.
00:39:41.519 --> 00:39:42.159
Yeah.
00:39:42.480 --> 00:39:42.800
Yeah.
00:39:43.039 --> 00:39:44.719
So animals already do this.
00:39:44.800 --> 00:39:58.239
And so they kind of the advantage of their primal state knows how to regulate itself, but because our minds are so active, we can literally keep reactivating that stress cycle and stay in it.
00:39:58.480 --> 00:40:05.519
And so that creates that chronic stress loop where it can completely redefine you.
00:40:05.760 --> 00:40:12.079
So we're all we're all beings, we all have this survival system, which is awesome.
00:40:12.320 --> 00:40:15.679
I love that, but a lot of times we just don't know how to work with it.
00:40:15.920 --> 00:40:20.159
So we get in our heads and we say, like, oh, I don't know why, why would I do that?
00:40:20.239 --> 00:40:21.920
Or I don't, I need proof.
00:40:22.079 --> 00:40:26.559
You know, we kind of get stuck in this, and that keeps us from healing properly.
00:40:26.880 --> 00:40:27.280
Wow.
00:40:27.440 --> 00:40:34.960
Well, I hope everyone looks at the links and takes this burnout pattern quiz and reaches out to Lindsay to get it.
00:40:35.039 --> 00:40:36.960
She offers a 30-day pleasure reset.
00:40:37.039 --> 00:40:39.119
There's so many different ways to work with her one-on-one.
00:40:39.360 --> 00:40:45.039
And depending on when you find this episode in the future, just go to her website, shacral.com.
00:40:45.119 --> 00:40:49.360
There's gonna be more, more in there than we've even covered today.
00:40:49.760 --> 00:40:53.920
And was there anything else you wanted to say about that before I tell you my quiz results?
00:40:54.159 --> 00:40:55.199
Um, no, no, we're good.
00:40:55.280 --> 00:40:56.400
I want to hear what'd you get?
00:40:56.719 --> 00:40:58.000
So I took the quiz.
00:40:58.159 --> 00:40:58.400
Yes.
00:40:58.639 --> 00:41:00.719
No surprise, I'm a harmonizer.
00:41:01.599 --> 00:41:02.239
Wow.
00:41:03.280 --> 00:41:03.599
Okay.
00:41:04.159 --> 00:41:05.199
That makes sense.
00:41:05.679 --> 00:41:08.639
So that aligns with what you're just saying, right?
00:41:08.880 --> 00:41:09.440
It does.
00:41:09.599 --> 00:41:10.000
It does.
00:41:10.079 --> 00:41:11.920
And obviously, there's more in the email.
00:41:12.000 --> 00:41:15.199
So make sure you put in your email to get the full details of your results.
00:41:15.360 --> 00:41:23.199
But the first page just says you're warm and connective, bringing people together in harmony, but in burnout, constant peacemaking drains your body and spirit.
00:41:23.360 --> 00:41:27.039
Your recovery begins with boundaries that protect your glow.
00:41:27.199 --> 00:41:30.159
Look at this neon sign behind me, and you've got one too.
00:41:30.239 --> 00:41:32.559
And we both have the same response.
00:41:32.639 --> 00:41:35.199
And I'm sure many people listening and watching do too.
00:41:35.360 --> 00:41:36.880
So tell me a little bit more about this.
00:41:36.960 --> 00:41:40.719
And I'm going to return the gift by pulling some cards for you and our audience after this.
00:41:40.960 --> 00:41:42.159
Oh, beautiful.
00:41:42.400 --> 00:41:43.360
And I just had a moment.
00:41:43.440 --> 00:41:46.719
So I paused for a second to tell Lindsay I had to go pee real quick.
00:41:47.039 --> 00:41:59.840
And I came back and I thought, wow, I've come so far because I remember being five years old in karate practice, and I was so nervous to disrupt the class.
00:41:59.920 --> 00:42:07.039
I held my pee as long as I could, and I wound up peeing and standing in my own pee in class, hoping everybody.
00:42:07.679 --> 00:42:09.679
I know, sweet little Alicia.
00:42:10.639 --> 00:42:20.320
She was so scared to be disruptive and to be upset anyone or get you know extra attention or miss anything, right?
00:42:20.400 --> 00:42:22.239
And now I'm like, hey, I gotta pee out right back.
00:42:22.400 --> 00:42:27.760
I'm like, go you, like almost 40 years later, I'm like, I got this job.
00:42:28.639 --> 00:42:29.840
Good job, little Lily.
00:42:30.480 --> 00:42:34.239
That reminds me, I had an experience like that, similar.
00:42:34.400 --> 00:42:39.280
I remember I was like six, six, six, five or six years old.
00:42:39.440 --> 00:42:41.280
And my mom's like, Do you have to go to the bathroom?
00:42:41.360 --> 00:42:47.199
I was for a Halloween costume party or or a contest at the mall.
00:42:47.679 --> 00:42:48.480
So cool.
00:42:48.719 --> 00:42:50.960
And my mom said, Do you have to go to the bathroom?
00:42:51.280 --> 00:42:54.800
And I was like, No, but I was so nervous.
00:42:54.960 --> 00:42:55.840
I just said, No.
00:42:56.000 --> 00:42:57.360
And she said, Okay.
00:42:58.400 --> 00:43:03.440
So then we got to the stage and I was like two kids away, and I just peed on myself.
00:43:06.719 --> 00:43:07.760
What was your costume?
00:43:08.400 --> 00:43:11.199
I was an angel all white.
00:43:13.039 --> 00:43:24.239
So now I'm like thinking back, like I I didn't even know I was probably peeing because I I just my body, I was so nervous that I just peed and mommed me up.
00:43:24.559 --> 00:43:26.480
Like I like I got it.
00:43:26.639 --> 00:43:28.239
She's like, you embarrassed me.
00:43:28.320 --> 00:43:29.920
I can't believe you did this.
00:43:31.199 --> 00:43:32.719
I think I deleted that memory.
00:43:32.800 --> 00:43:34.079
Thanks a lot for bringing it back.
00:43:36.400 --> 00:43:41.519
You're welcome because now, oh my gosh.
00:43:41.840 --> 00:43:52.559
That I never realized it because I always have like kind of this a fear, not a fear, but a hesitation with really fully being visible.
00:43:52.719 --> 00:43:54.559
I've noticed I'm working on it.
00:43:54.800 --> 00:43:57.840
And that might actually play a role.
00:43:58.000 --> 00:43:59.599
I always thought it was because I was bullied.
00:44:00.159 --> 00:44:05.679
Growing up, like in middle school, but now I'm like, oh my gosh, that's probably a subconscious thing.
00:44:06.559 --> 00:44:09.760
Oh that's crazy.
00:44:10.079 --> 00:44:10.960
Anyway.
00:44:12.079 --> 00:44:14.719
Look at us having breakthroughs on this show.
00:44:16.639 --> 00:44:18.079
That's crazy.
00:44:18.639 --> 00:44:19.280
I love it.
00:44:19.360 --> 00:44:23.840
I love how the universe just put us together so we both could expand from that memory.
00:44:23.920 --> 00:44:29.119
And everyone listening and watching right now is thinking back to when they were little and
like something like that, right?
00:44:29.280 --> 00:44:32.480
Where they didn't speak up for themselves or they got scared.
00:44:32.639 --> 00:44:45.519
And it's true when I went to hypnotherapy college, they taught us most of our responses as adults come from patterns that are developed, you know, and synapses in our brain that are created when we're between the ages of two and nine.
00:44:45.679 --> 00:44:49.519
We think like that's the truth and how we're supposed to respond for the rest of our lives.
00:44:49.599 --> 00:44:57.360
And we have to do all this deprogramming and changing and work to like unlearn all this stuff as adults.
00:44:57.519 --> 00:45:02.079
It's like no wonder, like, you know, parents are always so scared they're gonna mess up their kids.
00:45:02.159 --> 00:45:04.800
And it's like, you will, it's okay.
00:45:05.199 --> 00:45:09.039
Like you bounce, you'll bounce back and they'll they'll make a great podcast.
00:45:12.239 --> 00:45:14.159
Oh my god, I love you.
00:45:14.320 --> 00:45:15.199
Oh gosh.
00:45:15.360 --> 00:45:20.800
Okay, so I'm gonna share a little deeper into you being the harmonizer.
00:45:21.039 --> 00:45:24.320
So if this isn't right, then let me know.
00:45:24.480 --> 00:45:35.440
But it is it sounds like you're likely to be an extrovert and that you crave security and that you lead from your heart.
00:45:36.159 --> 00:45:40.960
So it sounds like you need emotional and relational safety.
00:45:41.119 --> 00:45:43.679
So you need to feel safe in your relationships.
00:45:43.920 --> 00:45:50.000
You may burn out when you're surrounded by a lot of conflict or instability or unreliable people.
00:45:50.880 --> 00:46:00.000
You may thrive in community, expression, and connection, but you may burn out when you feel silenced, ignored, or disconnected from others.
00:46:00.239 --> 00:46:10.559
You lead with empathy, warmth, and care, but you can burn out from people pleasing, emotional overextending, and carrying the group's harmony on your shoulders.
00:46:10.800 --> 00:46:13.760
Does that sound in alignment?
00:46:14.000 --> 00:46:20.000
Yeah, you know, the introvert-extrovert thing is always back and forth with me when I'm day, right?
00:46:20.239 --> 00:46:24.079
Yeah, when I took my Myers Briggs a couple of times, and I'm always an INFJ.
00:46:24.159 --> 00:46:30.239
So I always start with the introvert side and I love these intimate conversations, but I love public speaking.
00:46:30.400 --> 00:46:33.440
I love officiating weddings, I love leading group coaching calls.
00:46:33.599 --> 00:46:37.440
And in the quiz, there was a question about being alone versus being with people.
00:46:37.840 --> 00:46:43.519
And I do find, although I crave alone time and I need alone time and I do recharge on alone time.
00:46:44.000 --> 00:46:51.519
When I have my people, like my people around me and happiness and joy and laughter and friends around me, I snap back better.
00:46:51.599 --> 00:46:54.159
I'm more inspired, I love going to concerts.
00:46:54.400 --> 00:47:00.880
So there is something in my healing that's connected with people, but I can be quite shy.
00:47:01.360 --> 00:47:09.760
And I don't know if extrovertedness and shyness, what the connection is there, but I'm a wallflower at a party.
00:47:09.920 --> 00:47:11.360
I'm not the center of attention.
00:47:11.519 --> 00:47:15.440
And when I get attention, I start getting nervous, but then I start to like it.
00:47:15.679 --> 00:47:16.000
Right?
00:47:16.559 --> 00:47:17.039
Yeah.
00:47:17.440 --> 00:47:19.039
I'm also an INFJ.
00:47:19.440 --> 00:47:20.559
You are, yeah.
00:47:20.719 --> 00:47:24.639
But there, you know, there's a spectrum for each of those traits.
00:47:24.719 --> 00:47:31.119
And I actually did a full podcast series on the burnout archetypes for every personality uh type.
00:47:31.280 --> 00:47:32.559
So we just wrap that up.
00:47:32.719 --> 00:47:38.079
If you want to check that out, I will so there's a that spectrum between like introvert and extrovert.
00:47:38.239 --> 00:47:44.960
So sometimes I listen to like multiples of the different episodes because I might be higher in one over the other.
00:47:45.039 --> 00:47:56.800
So they all overlap, you know, we can't like totally box ourselves in completely, but it's just like a little guide in a way to see where we also end up burning.
00:47:57.199 --> 00:48:00.400
The last thing here, read the last couple sentences you said again.
00:48:00.800 --> 00:48:11.199
You lead with warmth, empathy, and care, but you may burn out from people pleasing, emotional overextending, and carrying the group's harmony on your shoulders.
00:48:11.440 --> 00:48:12.000
That's what it was.
00:48:12.079 --> 00:48:16.000
Okay, so in 2024, I paused my Sapphire Collective.
00:48:16.079 --> 00:48:17.519
It was a different version than I'm doing now.
00:48:17.599 --> 00:48:19.119
Right now I'm doing a 90-day pop-up.
00:48:19.599 --> 00:48:22.639
And depending on when people find this episode, that pop-up might be over.
00:48:22.719 --> 00:48:24.000
I might be doing a different one.
00:48:24.159 --> 00:48:26.400
But there's always fun ways to work with me.
00:48:26.719 --> 00:48:28.880
And I think that was it.
00:48:29.039 --> 00:48:33.280
And I couldn't quite put it into words, but what you said now really resonates.
00:48:33.920 --> 00:48:36.159
I love leading group calls.
00:48:36.400 --> 00:48:39.440
I love teaching, I love guiding, I love channeling.
00:48:39.679 --> 00:48:47.440
But there were some things happening in the group dynamic where like some people were mad at each other, and like I couldn't fix that or help that.
00:48:47.519 --> 00:48:51.519
You know, people started collaborating, it didn't go well, and like I can't fix that or control that.
00:48:51.679 --> 00:48:55.360
Like you bring people together in a group, some people are gonna make friends, some people aren't.
00:48:55.599 --> 00:49:03.360
Some people wanted to leave
because they didn't like how some people were just so open on the group and other people left because they felt like they couldn't express themselves enough.
00:49:03.519 --> 00:49:08.159
It's like, oh my gosh, like I can't make everybody happy all the time.
00:49:08.400 --> 00:49:10.320
And I wanted to launch my podcast.
00:49:10.400 --> 00:49:12.559
And I'm like, I need energy to launch my podcast.
00:49:12.639 --> 00:49:19.519
I'm like, I think I need to pause because I'm channeling teaching every week and I want to move that channeled energy into leading the podcast.
00:49:20.400 --> 00:49:23.519
What we're talking about today, Lindsay, makes so much sense.
00:49:23.760 --> 00:49:36.639
And I think I actually really needed to pause it because I was burned out on carrying the group, even though I was like, I'm not burned out of teaching, I'm never gonna run out of shit to say.
00:49:36.960 --> 00:49:37.599
Same.
00:49:39.119 --> 00:49:41.280
I just couldn't put my finger on it.
00:49:41.679 --> 00:49:42.000
Yeah.
00:49:42.239 --> 00:49:43.760
Wow, this is eye-opening.
00:49:43.840 --> 00:49:45.039
I couldn't put my finger on it.
00:49:45.119 --> 00:49:47.119
It was carrying the group.
00:49:47.199 --> 00:49:49.920
And I think I didn't want to admit that that got hard for me.
00:49:50.880 --> 00:49:54.559
And I'm doing a pop-up group now, and it feels really easy, and the harmony feels there.
00:49:54.639 --> 00:50:02.000
And it doesn't mean everybody likes each other and some people are working together again, and like, you know, same thing, but like I just have a different approach to it now.
00:50:02.159 --> 00:50:02.639
Mm-hmm.
00:50:02.880 --> 00:50:05.599
Yeah, you can flow a lot better.
00:50:06.000 --> 00:50:07.920
But I took the year to work on myself.
00:50:08.320 --> 00:50:08.719
Good.
00:50:08.960 --> 00:50:09.679
Really good.
00:50:09.920 --> 00:50:10.960
That's so important.
00:50:11.119 --> 00:50:25.760
Because then you'll feel you'll notice that you feel like you can't like break through certain things, and I think that's why understanding your pattern is so important because you can keep changing all of these different things.
00:50:26.079 --> 00:50:31.280
And if you still um end up with the same result, it's like, what's the problem?
00:50:31.440 --> 00:50:32.719
Am I cursed?
00:50:34.480 --> 00:50:36.719
Um, but recognizing those patterns.
00:50:36.880 --> 00:50:45.519
So for me, mine was was similar, but I'm a little bit more introverted to where mine was the devoted anchor.
00:50:45.679 --> 00:50:46.800
That's my pattern.
00:50:46.960 --> 00:51:02.320
And my problem was basically loyalty burning me out, but it it's more like when I overly commit to something, if I walk away from it, it feels like failure, even if it's not serving me.
00:51:02.480 --> 00:51:04.960
So that's something that I have to be aware of.
00:51:05.039 --> 00:51:09.519
And sometimes that's not even just people, that could even be your diet.
00:51:09.679
--> 00:51:26.880
If you, if you're you eat a certain diet and you're like, it's not really working, but I've committed myself to and I've told everyone else about and I've put this, I bought this t-shirt for it, but then you're like, your body's suffering, but you don't want to let it like though like burnout can show up in so many different ways.
00:51:26.960 --> 00:51:31.360
And so that's why I say it's not from working too hard or any of those things.
00:51:31.519 --> 00:51:47.119
It really comes down to your patterns, but also learning how to create a system that works with you, not just kind of like organizing and like doing all these like basic things that people share, like, oh, rest more or organize.
00:51:47.760 --> 00:51:49.760
It's not gonna heal my burnout.
00:51:49.920 --> 00:51:51.360
No, organizing stresses me out.
00:51:51.519 --> 00:51:52.960
I'm starting to get better.
00:51:56.320 --> 00:52:00.480
I spent three hours organizing my pantry and now I I didn't get anything else done.
00:52:00.639 --> 00:52:04.719
So it shows up different for everyone, but that's interesting.
00:52:04.880 --> 00:52:06.000
Wow, it's amazing.
00:52:06.079 --> 00:52:11.679
Well, like, look at the breakthrough I had just from taking this quiz and you reading the results to me, right?
00:52:12.159 --> 00:52:18.960
So everybody go take this quiz and book a call with Lindsay and go over your results and talk about this.
00:52:19.119 --> 00:52:21.440
And like we all need you.
00:52:22.320 --> 00:52:23.119
Thank you.
00:52:23.360 --> 00:52:24.000
You're welcome.
00:52:24.079 --> 00:52:25.599
And corporate needs you.
00:52:26.000 --> 00:52:26.719
Thank you.
00:52:27.039 --> 00:52:28.320
And we need you.
00:52:30.400 --> 00:52:31.119
Thank you.
00:52:31.360 --> 00:52:32.000
I know.
00:52:33.039 --> 00:52:34.960
I love that amazing.
00:52:35.119 --> 00:52:39.679
Okay, well, I would love you to receive and set an intention.
00:52:39.840 --> 00:52:51.440
So everybody, not just Lindsay, you, my love, my darling, the sacred person who has their headphones on or might be driving or listening to this at work, hoping nobody notices.
00:52:52.480 --> 00:52:54.239
Set an intention right now.
00:52:55.280 --> 00:52:56.480
Set an intention.
00:52:57.119 --> 00:52:58.800
And these cards are here to guide you.
00:52:58.960 --> 00:53:04.320
I am making my own Oracle deck, but right now I'm using the work your light Rebecca Campbell deck.
00:53:04.719 --> 00:53:05.679
She's so brilliant.
00:53:06.079 --> 00:53:11.760
So, Lindsay, you're gonna pull the first card, and when you're ready, when you feel it, say now.
00:53:26.320 --> 00:53:27.119
Pleiades.
00:53:27.519 --> 00:53:29.199
Ooh, we'll talk about this.
00:53:29.360 --> 00:53:32.639
Okay, and then second card, I'm gonna pull.
00:53:38.400 --> 00:53:39.199
So perfect.
00:53:39.440 --> 00:53:48.639
Okay, so this first card, Penny Pleiades, double mission, channeling and uplifting humanity.
00:53:50.559 --> 00:53:51.199
Wow.
00:53:52.800 --> 00:53:54.320
Tell me about that reaction.
00:53:57.599 --> 00:54:01.199
Man, I'm feeling that for sure.
00:54:01.280 --> 00:54:03.920
I'm definitely feeling drawn to the collective.
00:54:04.079 --> 00:54:15.360
Like, I I can't just I want I even said to myself the other day, I was like, you just need to make a bigger goal of helping one million women get out of burnout.
00:54:15.519 --> 00:54:21.519
Like, so I was like, I just need to set this because if I strive for that, then I'll get like one percent.
00:54:21.679 --> 00:54:27.360
So they said how about a billion, billion, billion, a billion, ten billion.
00:54:27.679 --> 00:54:28.880
There's not even ten billion people.
00:54:29.039 --> 00:54:38.800
Okay, so the Pleiadians are a beautiful race of beings who are a planet of peace.
00:54:40.159 --> 00:54:46.079
They are so peaceful, and they love to study us because we are a planet of love.
00:54:47.119 --> 00:54:51.599
And the human race has such a great capacity for love.
00:54:52.239 --> 00:55:03.039
Maybe other planets and races, if you are open to these ideas, I think our universe is only one of many universes, so there must be life somewhere else, and all these beautiful suns creating energy and life.
00:55:03.920 --> 00:55:09.840
And there's other planets or uh communities that are so good at technology or peace, right?
00:55:10.000 --> 00:55:13.280
And and we're really good at love, even though we destroy each other all the time.
00:55:13.360 --> 00:55:16.719
We're not so good at peace, and technology has blown us up in the past.
00:55:16.960 --> 00:55:18.079
Sorry, Atlantis.
00:55:18.320 --> 00:55:20.400
All right, but the Pleiadians are here for peace.
00:55:20.480 --> 00:55:25.760
So peace and this inner peace, this inner harmony is part of your mission, Lindsay.
00:55:25.920 --> 00:55:29.760
And for everyone who's listening right now, this is part of your mission too.
00:55:29.920 --> 00:55:35.280
You've chosen to be a participant in this episode today because you crave more peace for yourself.
00:55:36.000 --> 00:55:37.920
And Lindsay is a teacher of peace.
00:55:38.079 --> 00:55:39.599
So let's impact a billion.
00:55:39.760 --> 00:55:41.440
Hopefully, we'll get a million.
00:55:41.760 --> 00:55:43.440
So I love seeing your face.
00:55:43.599 --> 00:55:46.320
I hope everyone who's listening is also watching the show.
00:55:46.480 --> 00:55:53.039
You can watch it on Apple and Spotify when you're logged in and on YouTube too, uh, and on my Patreon.
00:55:53.199 --> 00:55:56.000
So the second card is take a break.
00:55:57.199 --> 00:56:01.280
Oh, if that's not a she sacral card, I don't know what is.
00:56:01.679 --> 00:56:04.400
It says a life's work, not a season.
00:56:05.119 --> 00:56:07.119
Get off the treadmill.
00:56:08.159 --> 00:56:08.480
Okay.
00:56:09.119 --> 00:56:10.800
This is your life's work.
00:56:11.280 --> 00:56:11.679
All right.
00:56:12.079 --> 00:56:13.199
It's a marathon.
00:56:13.440
--> 00:56:15.360
You get to rest.
00:56:17.280 --> 00:56:21.119
So I think our mess is our message.
00:56:22.000 --> 00:56:31.440
And the work that we do, we're doing it because we also need to keep hearing it so that we can be a step ahead of everyone else.
00:56:31.519 --> 00:56:32.960
We're leading up the mountain.
00:56:33.679 --> 00:56:34.239
Yes.
00:56:34.480 --> 00:56:40.880
So as you go impact a billion, rest, do your own program, Lindsay, over and over and over.
00:56:41.119 --> 00:56:41.760
Me too.
00:56:41.920 --> 00:56:44.880
I'm going to start implementing what I've learned from you too.
00:56:45.199 --> 00:56:50.559
And I hope whoever is watching this right now or listening, go play.
00:56:50.719 --> 00:56:52.320
Go when you hang this up.
00:56:52.480 --> 00:56:56.880
If you don't have to go back to work, and there's a choice.
00:56:57.119 --> 00:57:02.079
Now, if you're if you have a regular job and you gotta stay there till a certain time, fine.
00:57:02.480 --> 00:57:14.800
But if you can go outside, like she said, and receive from the sun, or if it's nighttime, go receive from the moon or the stars or your own ancestors, people who have crossed over, family, go hug them.
00:57:14.960 --> 00:57:20.400
Go hug and cuddle your pets, go get your energy out, like my dog does all the time when he's being crazy.
00:57:21.280 --> 00:57:22.800
Get some zoomies in.
00:57:23.519 --> 00:57:26.480
Go get your zoomies and take a break, right?
00:57:26.559 --> 00:57:29.679
We think, oh, take a break always means like, oh, I need to go take a nap.
00:57:29.840 --> 00:57:33.920
It's like, no, sometimes it means like go for a walk, like move your body.
00:57:34.159 --> 00:57:35.679
So I love these cards.
00:57:35.760 --> 00:57:36.800
It's so perfect.
00:57:36.960 --> 00:57:38.400
They're so perfect, aren't they?
00:57:38.559 --> 00:57:39.760
For what we talked about today.
00:57:40.559 --> 00:57:41.599
Beautiful.
00:57:42.159 --> 00:57:42.639
Yeah.
00:57:42.880 --> 00:57:45.119
Thank you for sharing your energy today.
00:57:45.440 --> 00:57:46.800
Oh my little baby.
00:57:47.440 --> 00:57:48.239
You're welcome.
00:57:48.400 --> 00:57:50.000
It was so great to be on your show.
00:57:50.079 --> 00:57:52.719
I can't wait to come and be on your new show.
00:57:52.880 --> 00:57:53.119
Yeah.
00:57:53.280 --> 00:57:55.920
It's not even new at this point, but um, your newer show.
00:57:56.480 --> 00:57:57.840
It's a baby.
00:57:58.800 --> 00:57:59.599
It's a baby.
00:57:59.679 --> 00:58:02.159
Well, it will continue to be wildly successful.
00:58:02.320 --> 00:58:08.480
So everybody go to shesacral.com, take your burnout pattern quiz and follow the She Sacral podcast.
00:58:08.800 --> 00:58:09.920
Rate it five stars.
00:58:10.000 --> 00:58:11.920
Help her boost this new beautiful show.
00:58:12.079 --> 00:58:14.639
And I want to send so much love to your father.
00:58:14.960 --> 00:58:16.400
Oh, thank you so much.
00:58:16.719 --> 00:58:17.199
Thank you.
00:58:17.599 --> 00:58:18.079
You're welcome.
00:58:18.400 --> 00:58:19.199
It's been a journey.
00:58:19.280 --> 00:58:21.199
That's what's his first name?
00:58:21.440 --> 00:58:22.880
His name is Grady.
00:58:23.440 --> 00:58:23.920
Grady.
00:58:24.159 --> 00:58:35.519
So everyone who's listening and watching, I encourage you to light a candle for this magnificent man for healing, recovery, energy, just to feel good each day in whatever way that he can.
00:58:35.679 --> 00:58:38.719
So thank you, Lindsay, for allowing me to invite that.
00:58:38.880 --> 00:58:45.519
If anyone is involved in prayer circles, healing circles, just see Grady's energy illuminated.
00:58:45.840 --> 00:58:46.719
Absolutely.
00:58:46.960 --> 00:58:47.840
Thank you so much.
00:58:48.159 --> 00:58:48.639
You're welcome.
00:58:48.880 --> 00:58:50.239
I so appreciate you.
00:58:51.199 --> 00:58:55.199
Is there anything else you want to leave us with or guide us into connecting with you further?
00:58:55.599 --> 00:59:01.519
If you want to connect, just click wherever links are available there, and I'd be happy to meet with you.
00:59:01.760 --> 00:59:02.719
How wonderful.
00:59:02.960 --> 00:59:04.159
And isn't that fantastic?
00:59:04.320 --> 00:59:16.719
You know, we think that people who come on the show don't have time to spend time or aren't prioritizing one-on-one time with people because they've created this amazing brand and these products and these services and they have their own shows.
00:59:16.880 --> 00:59:19.119
And we are all still human beings.
00:59:19.519 --> 00:59:23.280
And I tell people, if you email me, I'm the one responding to you.
00:59:23.440 --> 00:59:26.159
Like, yes, I have a team, but it's me.
00:59:26.320 --> 00:59:28.719
If you're emailing Alicia, it's me.
00:59:29.039 --> 00:59:30.480
So we're human beings.
00:59:30.559 --> 00:59:31.039
We love you.
00:59:31.199 --> 00:59:32.239
We want to spend time with you.
00:59:32.320 --> 00:59:32.960
We want to help you.
00:59:33.039 --> 00:59:33.679
We want to support you.
00:59:33.760 --> 00:59:34.960
We want to shine a light on you.
00:59:35.119 --> 00:59:42.400
If you come to our calendars and they're full or turned off temporarily, come back again in the future or reach out and say, What can I get involved in now?
00:59:42.559 --> 00:59:45.519
Maybe in a group container or a replay of something.
00:59:45.679 --> 00:59:51.039
So empower yourself to reach out and connect and receive.
00:59:51.920 --> 00:59:53.440
Yes, receive.
00:59:53.599 --> 00:59:55.519
Allow, allow, allow.
00:59:56.880 --> 00:59:57.840
All right, my angel.
00:59:57.920 --> 00:59:58.880
This was so fun.
00:59:59.039 --> 00:59:59.760
We will do it again.
00:59:59.840 --> 01:00:06.559
I want to talk about cycle tracking and how that can help the budding and blooming entrepreneur next time you come back.
01:00:06.880 --> 01:00:08.000
Absolutely, for sure.
01:00:08.320 --> 01:00:08.880
How fun.
01:00:09.519 --> 01:00:10.800
This or something greater.
01:00:11.039 --> 01:00:11.519
Bye.
01:00:11.840 --> 01:00:12.400
Bye.
01:00:12.719 --> 01:00:16.960
Be sure to connect with me at patreon.com forward slash the brilliance method.
01:00:17.119 --> 01:00:22.719
The only way I'll know if you're loving the show is if you leave a comment, five stars, and subscribe.