Full Transcript for It's worth it! A Q&A with our husbands

with us for sure. 00:02:03.359 --> 00:02:05.680 This is a great way to do this too, is to have the husbands here. 00:02:05.920 --> 00:02:07.120 So we're so excited. 00:02:07.200 --> 00:02:08.479 We have some questions. 00:02:08.639 --> 00:02:12.479 Yeah, and we are gonna be sharing those with these guys. 00:02:12.639 --> 00:02:16.879 But um, we definitely have um that giveaway is still going. 00:02:17.199 --> 00:02:25.599 If you send in your latte moment recipe and it gets selected and on air, on air, you will get a three t-shirt. 00:02:25.919 --> 00:02:36.159 And they can send those recipes through DMs on either of our Instagram accounts or even in our comments, or at staywellgrounded.com. 00:02:36.240 --> 00:02:37.599 Yeah, there's a little messaging. 00:02:37.840 --> 00:02:40.159 We are very easy to find and get in touch with. 00:02:40.400 --> 00:02:40.800 Very good. 00:02:40.879 --> 00:02:41.919 So please reach out to us. 00:02:42.000 --> 00:02:42.639 We would love that. 00:02:42.719 --> 00:02:43.280 We would love that. 00:02:43.360 --> 00:02:46.800 You can also comment recipes on a post and we will see that too. 00:02:46.960 --> 00:02:48.080 Yeah, we'll be tracking that. 00:02:48.319 --> 00:02:50.560 We're looking for those, and so we can't wait to help. 00:02:50.800 --> 00:02:51.280 We're excited. 00:02:51.759 --> 00:02:54.159 Encourage you to uh join in on the fun. 00:02:54.240 --> 00:02:55.039 I think it'll be great. 00:02:55.280 --> 00:02:56.960 Hi guys, you want to introduce yourselves? 00:02:57.759 --> 00:02:59.439 I'm I'm not Tim. 00:02:59.919 --> 00:03:00.800 I'm Dan. 00:03:01.599 --> 00:03:01.919 Dan. 00:03:02.639 --> 00:03:03.840 I am Tim. 00:03:04.400 --> 00:03:06.240 And it's great to be back again. 00:03:06.560 --> 00:03:07.039 Yay! 00:03:07.599 --> 00:03:08.879 We just we just had too much. 00:03:08.960 --> 00:03:09.280 Too much. 00:03:09.599 --> 00:03:10.479 Maybe our last episode. 00:03:11.280 --> 00:03:13.439 All right, here's like a really personal question that just came. 00:03:13.599 --> 00:03:15.439 Are you a Daniel or just Dan? 00:03:15.919 --> 00:03:18.240 Uh well, uh yeah, Daniel is my fool. 00:03:18.479 --> 00:03:18.719 Okay. 00:03:19.039 --> 00:03:20.159 Not many people call me that. 00:03:20.400 --> 00:03:21.599 I I could start, I could start. 00:03:21.759 --> 00:03:22.960 What about Daniel? 00:03:23.280 --> 00:03:24.400 Uh not Danny. 00:03:24.560 --> 00:03:24.879 No. 00:03:25.280 --> 00:03:26.639 No one's ever called me Danny. 00:03:26.800 --> 00:03:27.360 Daniel Son. 00:03:27.599 --> 00:03:27.919 You know why? 00:03:28.080 --> 00:03:29.360 Because your mom is really against it. 00:03:29.599 --> 00:03:30.000 Is that it? 00:03:30.080 --> 00:03:30.319 Yeah, yes. 00:03:30.639 --> 00:03:31.599 Okay, that that might be. 00:03:32.000 --> 00:03:32.800 He's very against it. 00:03:32.879 --> 00:03:34.800 She his brother's actually named Tim. 00:03:35.280 --> 00:03:35.840 Timothy. 00:03:36.080 --> 00:03:36.719 Yes, that's true. 00:03:37.039 --> 00:03:39.039 My grandmother called me Daniel, only Daniel. 00:03:39.919 --> 00:03:41.840 I think your mom has a problem with Danielson. 00:03:42.080 --> 00:03:42.800 Daniel son. 00:03:43.120 --> 00:03:43.439 Yeah. 00:03:43.599 --> 00:03:45.759 Well owed to karate kid. 00:03:45.919 --> 00:03:46.639 We love that. 00:03:46.879 --> 00:03:48.000 But you are Timothy. 00:03:48.240 --> 00:03:48.879 I am Timothy. 00:03:49.039 --> 00:03:49.360 Yes. 00:03:49.520 --> 00:03:51.120 And you're called Tim. 00:03:51.360 --> 00:03:52.319 Yes, I'm called Tim. 00:03:52.400 --> 00:03:56.400 My middle name is James, so I'm thinking about a clothing line of Timothy James. 00:03:56.560 --> 00:03:56.960 Oh, nice. 00:03:57.439 --> 00:03:58.560 That sounds like something you would buy. 00:03:58.960 --> 00:03:59.759 We can share that on the top. 00:04:00.080 --> 00:04:01.039 That sounds fancy. 00:04:02.000 --> 00:04:02.479 Coming soon. 00:04:02.719 --> 00:04:03.280 Timothy James. 00:04:04.000 --> 00:04:04.879 She has been fine. 00:04:05.199 --> 00:04:05.759 Timothy James. 00:04:05.919 --> 00:04:06.400 I'm wearing it. 00:04:06.639 --> 00:04:07.039 Is that a T. 00:04:07.120 --> 00:04:08.000 James you're wearing? 00:04:08.159 --> 00:04:08.319 Yes. 00:04:08.800 --> 00:04:09.439 T James. 00:04:09.840 --> 00:04:10.719 I love it. 00:04:11.759 --> 00:04:12.240 Alrighty goes. 00:04:13.599 --> 00:04:13.840 All right. 00:04:14.000 --> 00:04:17.439 I'm going to get us started on our questions before we get really sidetracked here. 00:04:18.639 --> 00:04:19.920 Well instead of take your time. 00:04:21.040 --> 00:04:27.360 I want, we want, we, these are, you know, questions that we've pondered and wanted to share and get your thoughts on. 00:04:27.519 --> 00:04:29.759 So all right, we're hitting the ground running with this one. 00:04:30.079 --> 00:04:30.480 All right. 00:04:30.800 --> 00:04:40.480 What would you say to a young to young men who are not sure that dating and marriage are worth the trouble and the money? 00:04:40.720 --> 00:04:41.839 I mean, this is a big one. 00:04:42.000 --> 00:04:43.199 We're going for it already. 00:04:43.759 --> 00:04:46.079 What would you say, Tim? 00:04:46.399 --> 00:04:47.600 How much money are we talking about? 00:04:47.920 --> 00:04:49.839 100% buy-in. 00:04:50.560 --> 00:04:57.040 This is the best decision you can ever make in the history of the world outside your relationship with Jesus. 00:04:58.160 --> 00:05:00.000 And uh it is so important. 00:05:00.560 --> 00:05:01.439 Think about this. 00:05:01.600 --> 00:05:04.480 This is your life mate for the rest of your life. 00:05:04.800 --> 00:05:10.480 And someone who can know the good, the bad, and the ugly, and they will still stay with you. 00:05:10.720 --> 00:05:11.279 That's awesome. 00:05:11.759 --> 00:05:12.319 For better or for worse. 00:05:12.639 --> 00:05:13.519 For better or for worse. 00:05:13.839 --> 00:05:15.279 So I would say 100%. 00:05:15.759 --> 00:05:16.639

Oh very good. 00:05:16.879 --> 00:05:17.439 Good answer. 00:05:17.600 --> 00:05:17.759 Yes. 00:05:17.920 --> 00:05:18.240 Good answer. 00:05:18.480 --> 00:05:18.720 Good answer. 00:05:20.399 --> 00:05:21.199 Yeah, definitely. 00:05:21.439 --> 00:05:30.399 I mean, I always I told the kids this, and you know, it's just like I've doubted a lot of stuff I've done, like what school I've gone to and this job, and there's any of it. 00:05:30.560 --> 00:05:38.959 But it's just like that is like the rock solid, kind of like it's almost weird, but I've just never, you know, it's just the main pure decision. 00:05:39.040 --> 00:05:39.600 I mean, yeah. 00:05:40.000 --> 00:05:40.879 Well, excusing me. 00:05:40.959 --> 00:05:41.120 Yes. 00:05:41.360 --> 00:05:41.680 That was it? 00:05:41.920 --> 00:05:42.160 That was it. 00:05:42.319 --> 00:05:43.120 I just want you to be clear. 00:05:43.439 --> 00:05:44.480 Yeah, that's the thing. 00:05:44.639 --> 00:05:45.199 Yeah, marriage. 00:05:45.360 --> 00:05:46.160 Um say it again. 00:05:47.199 --> 00:05:48.319 I think it's implied. 00:05:49.920 --> 00:05:50.560 The topic. 00:05:50.879 --> 00:05:52.399 He's like, don't put me on the spot. 00:05:52.560 --> 00:05:52.720 Yeah. 00:05:52.879 --> 00:05:56.000 So we have we have been able to thank you. 00:05:56.079 --> 00:05:56.879 That's very sweet. 00:05:57.120 --> 00:05:57.199 Yeah. 00:05:57.360 --> 00:06:00.800 Um, we have kids that are in their 20s now. 00:06:00.959 --> 00:06:01.279 Yeah. 00:06:01.519 --> 00:06:03.759 And two of them are married. 00:06:04.160 --> 00:06:07.519 And we are two for two on son-in-laws. 00:06:08.879 --> 00:06:09.360 Precious. 00:06:09.680 --> 00:06:10.079 Amazing. 00:06:10.639 --> 00:06:12.480 You don't realize what you're missing in a family. 00:06:12.560 --> 00:06:15.360 And I know this is questions we're supposed to be asking the husbands. 00:06:15.439 --> 00:06:15.600 Yeah. 00:06:15.759 --> 00:06:16.800 I don't want to chime in. 00:06:17.279 --> 00:06:17.519 Shocking. 00:06:18.240 --> 00:06:18.879 Shocking. 00:06:19.120 --> 00:06:31.519 But and I because I can't speak to the young men about this, but I can speak from the perspective of someone who's benefited from her husband investing in the family and saying that this is a priority. 00:06:31.759 --> 00:06:39.600 Because there is a lot of sacrifice that men have to make to have a successful marriage and family and to be to be loving dads. 00:06:39.759 --> 00:06:41.120 They do have to lay things down. 00:06:41.279 --> 00:06:44.639 They do have to get at the back of the line a lot of times. 00:06:45.199 --> 00:06:47.199 You know, like to say this is my priority. 00:06:47.439 --> 00:06:54.319 If if there's a choice between my child having what they need and me getting what I want, you're gonna choose your family and your kids. 00:06:54.560 --> 00:07:04.480 And I mean that that's an that cultivates kind of an unselfishness that kind of you know tears that down, like our temptation to just be

self-centered. 00:07:04.879 --> 00:07:07.839 Yeah, marriage and parenting can really help with that. 00:07:08.079 --> 00:07:16.639 Yeah, and I've said to young families in particular that your hobby is your family because that's who you should be spending your time with. 00:07:16.800 --> 00:07:16.959 Yeah. 00:07:17.360 --> 00:07:25.360 Because if you're out playing golf for five hours, maybe you can do that from time to time, but on a regular basis, you're missing out on precious time. 00:07:25.439 --> 00:07:26.720 There'll be plenty of time for golf. 00:07:26.959 --> 00:07:27.199 Right. 00:07:27.279 --> 00:07:27.519 Yeah. 00:07:27.759 --> 00:07:29.920 And take your son, or just take your son golfing. 00:07:30.720 --> 00:07:32.879 Or if you can take your kids golfing, that's that's another thing. 00:07:34.079 --> 00:07:34.480 We're teasing. 00:07:34.639 --> 00:07:38.000 No, we're just teasing because our our son is like, really, that's family time. 00:07:38.079 --> 00:07:38.319 Yeah, yeah. 00:07:38.560 --> 00:07:39.360 Let's go golfing. 00:07:39.519 --> 00:07:39.759 Yes. 00:07:40.000 --> 00:07:40.959 So I love it. 00:07:41.040 --> 00:07:41.759 No, you're right. 00:07:41.839 --> 00:07:49.040 It's in especially those young kid years, just being in the trenches together is such a bonding, it's such a rewarding thing. 00:07:49.439 --> 00:07:58.240 Well, and when you're talking even about that in the young years, um dads parent different than moms do, and that's why you make a great team. 00:07:58.480 --> 00:08:09.759 You know, uh sometimes the kids know how to push all your buttons, and sometimes they know how to push all your buttons, and you kind of work together to just to create um the best space that you can. 00:08:09.839 --> 00:08:20.079 And so it's it's important that you kind of remember there's no I and team, so you kind of work together to create that um what's gonna work best for your family unit. 00:08:20.399 --> 00:08:20.560 Love it. 00:08:21.279 --> 00:08:21.519 Love it. 00:08:21.600 --> 00:08:22.000 Okay, definitely. 00:08:22.399 --> 00:08:23.519 Is it my turn with the question? 00:08:24.160 --> 00:08:25.360 Okay, all right. 00:08:26.000 --> 00:08:30.959 All right, from the other side, we talked about young men, so this is coming from the other side. 00:08:31.439 --> 00:08:36.080 Um, girls are always talking about trying to understand the way men think. 00:08:36.559 --> 00:08:38.240 Is this worth the effort? 00:08:38.639 --> 00:08:45.279 Do you think that it's necessary for women, for females, to really try to understand men? 00:08:46.720 --> 00:08:47.919 Is there a benefit? 00:08:48.960 --> 00:08:49.440 No, I don't think so. 00:08:49.759 --> 00:08:51.200 Dan, would you like to answer this question? 00:08:51.519 --> 00:08:52.639 I don't know how I think. 00:08:53.279 --> 00:08:56.639 It's because you don't know how you think it's not words. 00:08:57.279 --> 00:08:58.480 Don't quiz you want to. 00:08:59.440 --> 00:09:00.639 Good luck with that. 00:09:03.440 --> 00:09:05.200 So that's a that's a no from Dan. 00:09:05.279 --> 00:09:06.240 How about you, Tim? 00:09:06.639 --> 00:09:07.600 That's a fair answer. 00:09:07.679 --> 00:09:08.399 That's a good answer. 00:09:10.000 --> 00:09:12.960 I would say love is the key. 00:09:14.399 --> 00:09:16.799 I don't know if you'll ever understand because it is true. 00:09:18.559 --> 00:09:24.000 Well, it it is true that when you ask a man sometimes, what are you thinking? 00:09:24.240 --> 00:09:27.919 And the truth is, we'd actually not be thinking about anything. 00:09:28.159 --> 00:09:29.039 It's a very fair question. 00:09:30.000 --> 00:09:30.559 I'm not lying. 00:09:31.440 --> 00:09:33.039 I'm really not thinking about anything. 00:09:33.279 --> 00:09:34.720 We've literally had this fight. 00:09:34.960 --> 00:09:36.000 We've had this fight. 00:09:36.080 --> 00:09:37.600 Yeah, we have that's not possible. 00:09:37.759 --> 00:09:41.440 I remember you saying it's not possible that you're not thinking something. 00:09:41.919 --> 00:09:43.440 And you're like, oh, it is. 00:09:43.679 --> 00:09:44.399 It is possible. 00:09:44.720 --> 00:09:45.120 It is true. 00:09:45.200 --> 00:09:46.559 I I'm really just sitting here. 00:09:47.200 --> 00:09:47.840 I want to be screaming. 00:09:48.480 --> 00:09:49.039 That's what I'm thinking. 00:09:51.519 --> 00:09:53.120 There's been so many. 00:09:54.240 --> 00:09:59.519 We would look like we might have wisdom, but it's really not there. 00:10:00.799 --> 00:10:02.720 I am literally just sitting here. 00:10:07.759 --> 00:10:08.720 I was looking over here. 00:10:13.679 --> 00:10:15.360 So let's pull it together. 00:10:15.679 --> 00:10:17.759 This is pretty whimsical right here. 00:10:18.399 --> 00:10:22.080 So I truly love what you guys have all just said. 00:10:22.240 --> 00:10:22.960 I think it's good. 00:10:23.039 --> 00:10:25.759 I'm just gonna circle us back around for just a minute. 00:10:25.840 --> 00:10:52.480 And what made me think about when we were just just having that um moment is in 1 Corinthians 13, where it does talk, it's that uh special passage that you hear at almost every wedding um, where it says love is patient, love is kind, it does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud, it is not dis it does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 00:10:52.720 --> 00:10:56.559 Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. 00:10:56.799 --> 00:11:01.840 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres. 00:11:02.159 --> 00:11:14.559 And to go to what you're saying there is if you are in love with your husband, that's what you feel, even if there might not be thinking about anything. 00:11:14.879 --> 00:11:19.919 Right, that and you even said it, that that love ties that all together. 00:11:20.080 --> 00:11:20.720 It's all about love. 00:11:21.039 --> 00:11:21.919 It's all about love. 00:11:22.080 -->

00:11:31.600 It always protects, my husband protects me, it always trusts, we trust each other, and always hopes, we believe and dream together, and it always perseveres. 00:11:31.679 --> 00:11:33.840 We're gonna always rise above the next thing. 00:11:34.240 --> 00:11:35.120 I have been encouraged by that. 00:11:35.759 --> 00:11:36.240 So good. 00:11:36.480 --> 00:11:37.600 I know, I know. 00:11:37.919 --> 00:11:38.799 So that's what makes it. 00:11:38.960 --> 00:11:39.440 That's really good. 00:11:39.679 --> 00:11:40.480 That's really good. 00:11:40.639 --> 00:11:41.519 Yeah, good stuff. 00:11:42.000 --> 00:11:52.159 The um the idea that you can um try to take a marriage or a relationship and pick all these little things out, they're definitely gonna come up. 00:11:52.240 --> 00:12:04.159 They're definitely gonna be like, I'm just was trying to get inside your head and think about you, you know, yeah, versus I'm believing that you're for my good and I'm for your good. 00:12:04.320 --> 00:12:04.559 Yeah. 00:12:04.799 --> 00:12:08.960 Um, our favorite book that we talk about, Love and Respect, he calls it goodwill in marriage. 00:12:09.120 --> 00:12:09.200 Oh. 00:12:09.519 --> 00:12:24.799 Just giving each other the benefit of the doubt is so powerful because the assumption is we are the same team and we are heading in the same direction, but just normal life of living with another person is going, things are gonna come up. 00:12:24.879 --> 00:12:27.519 We're not the same person, we're a balance of each other. 00:12:27.759 --> 00:12:30.720 So to not get hung up on things that don't matter. 00:12:30.799 --> 00:12:31.360 But very good. 00:12:31.679 --> 00:12:32.399 Okay, I have another one. 00:12:33.360 --> 00:12:38.799 Um we are all in a season of launching kids, we call it. 00:12:39.120 --> 00:12:42.240 Um, the call the quiet house sometimes on this podcast. 00:12:42.399 --> 00:12:44.879 We call it emptiness, some people call it emptiness. 00:12:45.360 --> 00:12:48.799 We are not experiencing much emptiness currently, but that's a different thing. 00:12:48.960 --> 00:12:52.639 I don't feel qualified to give advice on that right yet. 00:12:53.120 --> 00:12:54.000 That's been another year. 00:12:54.559 --> 00:12:56.320 Yes, we're we're heading in the right direction. 00:12:56.480 --> 00:13:03.600 In another year, we're heading in the right direction, but um, but even in college, they come back, they come back for visits and they bring like 10 friends with them. 00:13:03.840 --> 00:13:04.000 Sure. 00:13:04.320 --> 00:13:07.919 I have put more air mattresses and sleeping bags all over my house. 00:13:08.080 --> 00:13:10.399 Like, oh, spring break, is that your house? 00:13:10.480 --> 00:13:11.600 This is your house moments. 00:13:12.000 --> 00:13:16.559 So, okay, um, in this season, there's less daily demand on our kids. 00:13:16.799 --> 00:13:22.080 So, how are each of the couples, each of us, um, you guys can answer first. 00:13:22.240 --> 00:13:24.879 How are we being intentional with that time together? 00:13:25.679 --> 00:13:28.159 Are we using our quiet house time to connect? 00:13:28.240 --> 00:13:29.600 Like, give us a little report card. 00:13:29.679 --> 00:13:30.000 Yeah. 00:13:30.159 --> 00:13:31.120 That's what I want to know. 00:13:31.600 --> 00:13:34.639 What's how are we doing on the quiet house part? 00:13:36.399 --> 00:13:37.200 I think it's pretty good. 00:13:37.519 --> 00:13:38.799 Dan looks very perplexed. 00:13:39.759 --> 00:13:40.320 No, no, thank you. 00:13:41.039 --> 00:13:52.960 Yeah, no, it's I think you have your own stuff and then and then your your part your spouse has their own stuff, and then there's like Venn diagram that and so you get together to do that little thing in the middle. 00:13:53.120 --> 00:13:53.279 Yeah. 00:13:53.519 --> 00:13:54.639 Every once in a while. 00:13:54.960 --> 00:13:56.559 And uh that that seems to work. 00:13:56.720 --> 00:13:57.200 So it's quiet. 00:13:58.960 --> 00:14:00.960 Yeah, so it's quiet apart, but you know, we're gonna. 00:14:01.360 --> 00:14:04.159 So I I'm pretty sure you you all like to go on walks. 00:14:04.480 --> 00:14:04.799 We do. 00:14:05.039 --> 00:14:05.360 We do. 00:14:05.600 --> 00:14:12.000 Well, we've just started doing a little more walking because they have built these massive sidewalks on our outside of our house. 00:14:12.240 --> 00:14:14.720 Yes, and so it is amazing. 00:14:15.039 --> 00:14:22.240 We do still have one at home, but as soon as he goes to school, we're able to go out for a nice lengthy walk. 00:14:22.720 --> 00:14:26.000 And I don't know about you, but the walks Oh, the best. 00:14:26.559 --> 00:14:30.240 You're getting exercise and you're getting talk time. 00:14:30.480 --> 00:14:30.879 Yeah, yeah. 00:14:31.279 --> 00:14:32.720 And you're getting on the same page. 00:14:32.879 --> 00:14:33.120 Yeah. 00:14:33.360 --> 00:14:39.200 And if you're frustrated, you can wave your arms and do all sorts of stuff, and we're just focusing on doing what we have to do. 00:14:39.759 --> 00:14:46.240 Craig Gerschel, have you heard him say that they've solved almost every major issue in their marriage while on a walk. 00:14:46.320 --> 00:14:46.559 Yeah. 00:14:46.720 --> 00:14:52.559 Like he's a pastor that like really advocates that married couples need to be walking. 00:14:52.639 --> 00:14:55.759 You're shoulder to shoulder, so you're not coming at each other. 00:14:56.240 --> 00:14:59.759 You're like, there's like we're both looking at the same direction. 00:15:00.240 --> 00:15:01.440 There's a whole thing with it. 00:15:01.600 --> 00:15:01.759 Yeah. 00:15:01.919 --> 00:15:02.960 And I just I love it. 00:15:03.120 --> 00:15:05.200 We're we're typically walking at Disney World. 00:15:05.600 --> 00:15:11.360 Yeah, but at the end of the day, walking is just it's it's something that I think we take for granted. 00:15:11.519 --> 00:15:11.679 Yeah. 00:15:11.919 --> 00:15:16.960 Walking with whether

you're dating or whether you're uh in marriage. 00:15:17.279 --> 00:15:19.360 I think walking is really a key. 00:15:19.679 --> 00:15:21.600 It sounds simple, but it sounds simple. 00:15:22.879 --> 00:15:26.159 We haven't tried just swimming together, like in the same direction. 00:15:26.320 --> 00:15:31.440 I don't know, maybe swimming is not it, but backstroke is yeah. 00:15:32.080 --> 00:15:32.559 Yes. 00:15:33.279 --> 00:15:37.120 I definitely view the same thing that you're saying with the walking. 00:15:37.279 --> 00:15:44.960 I think um there's been a lot of times and uh talking things out for me is very important. 00:15:45.039 --> 00:15:59.120 And so by doing that and getting exercise, we talk about being like if you're walking on a beach or if you're able to do a nature hike or things, it's being in creation, being out there, and there's just your perspective changes. 00:15:59.440 --> 00:16:13.919 Um, so even something that could be irritating you or just kind of building tension kind of dissipates because you just realize it all just kind of goes away when you're when you go out there and stuff. 00:16:14.080 --> 00:16:15.039 So it's true. 00:16:15.200 --> 00:16:15.519 It's true. 00:16:15.759 --> 00:16:16.480 That's a great, great thing. 00:16:16.799 --> 00:16:17.919 What's our report card, babe? 00:16:20.240 --> 00:16:21.519 On how are we doing? 00:16:21.600 --> 00:16:22.320 I know you mentioned it. 00:16:22.399 --> 00:16:23.519 Well, I'm sorry, you did mention it. 00:16:23.600 --> 00:16:25.840 So you you were just saying that I feel like we're doing it. 00:16:26.240 --> 00:16:30.799 The two activities, like you have your things you want to do, I have mine, and then we meet up. 00:16:31.039 --> 00:16:40.879 Like whether that's dinners or like what would you say are some of the things that other than like walking, but are there other activities you guys like to I know you're a big board game. 00:16:41.120 --> 00:16:41.600 Yes, yeah. 00:16:41.919 --> 00:16:43.919 So sometimes that's a fun activity. 00:16:44.480 --> 00:16:45.840 Yeah, sometimes we do that. 00:16:46.000 --> 00:16:48.240 There's um we like movies. 00:16:48.559 --> 00:16:52.320 Yeah, movies occasionally, you know, and we like to discuss them afterwards. 00:16:52.399 --> 00:16:54.879 Yeah, or you know, for days, yeah. 00:16:55.039 --> 00:16:57.360 Sometimes like I'm still unpacking. 00:16:57.440 --> 00:16:58.799 What in the world happened to that maybe? 00:16:59.360 --> 00:17:02.000 But we do we do the theme parks quite a bit. 00:17:02.320 --> 00:17:02.399 Yeah. 00:17:02.559 --> 00:17:10.160 I mean, that's kind of our escape because it it we can't work there, we can't like it's it's like permission to it's true, yeah. 00:17:10.240 --> 00:17:12.480 It's it's permission to just not think about heavy stuff. 00:17:13.039 --> 00:17:14.559 Whimsical, yeah, for sure. 00:17:14.799 --> 00:17:15.200 For sure. 00:17:15.599 --> 00:17:16.400 It is, yeah. 00:17:16.640 --> 00:17:16.960 Love

it. 00:17:17.200 --> 00:17:18.240 Yeah, that's a physical. 00:17:18.640 --> 00:17:25.200 Even if we're not we're not really even doing that many rides or anything, we're mostly just walking, but just having the environment and those things. 00:17:25.519 --> 00:17:29.200 Yeah, we're eating and eating dinners is also a bad thing, too. 00:17:29.440 --> 00:17:32.240 Yeah, so we've been actually, I wanted to give a little shout out. 00:17:32.319 --> 00:17:41.599 We've been like for years, we were so practical with the kids' activities, and even if we were going to the same game, a lot of times we were bringing this kid and meeting up or something. 00:17:41.839 --> 00:17:49.440 Yeah, we've really tried to like even run errands together and just be together rather than I'm gonna stay home and do this and do this. 00:17:49.839 --> 00:17:53.359 Yes, we're trying to like we we have a funny story. 00:17:53.519 --> 00:17:56.640 I think it was like maybe our 10th anniversary. 00:17:56.799 --> 00:18:09.759 We had to stop and get gas on the way out of town, and I stayed, we we had left the you know, kids were with the sitter or my mom or something, but um we Dan pulls up and he's like, I'm gonna run in and get something to drink inside the little 7-Eleven. 00:18:10.000 --> 00:18:12.960 And I just sat in the car and he leans in and he goes, You can come with me. 00:18:13.039 --> 00:18:14.480 Oh there's no kids I can go. 00:18:14.880 --> 00:18:16.960 Or we're used to like one parent just sat in the car. 00:18:17.200 --> 00:18:18.160 Like, I didn't even think about it. 00:18:18.240 --> 00:18:19.440 I was just I was like, Huh. 00:18:19.519 --> 00:18:22.319 Yeah, we held hands and walked through the 7-Eleven. 00:18:22.480 --> 00:18:24.160 Like this is that's true. 00:18:24.240 --> 00:18:26.880 It's so many years of one parent has to stay in the car. 00:18:27.200 --> 00:18:27.680 That's very true. 00:18:27.759 --> 00:18:29.039 You're not unbuckling all those kids. 00:18:29.519 --> 00:18:30.480 This is new insight for me. 00:18:30.880 --> 00:18:32.160 Because I do stay in the car. 00:18:32.400 --> 00:18:34.480 I think I really this is life-changing. 00:18:34.559 --> 00:18:35.519 I may need to start coming in. 00:18:35.920 --> 00:18:37.599 Come to the grocery store. 00:18:37.839 --> 00:18:38.880 Yes, come to the grocery store. 00:18:39.119 --> 00:18:39.839 Are you the driver? 00:18:40.160 --> 00:18:40.720 You come up. 00:18:40.799 --> 00:18:41.920 That's my parents are 80. 00:18:42.160 --> 00:18:42.640 I am the driver. 00:18:42.880 --> 00:18:51.200 And they, my dad drives the my mom, it's close to the door, she does the Publix run, and then he comes back and gets her with the groceries, and it's a whole thing. 00:18:51.680 --> 00:18:53.599 If you're looking at speed, that's better. 00:18:54.079 --> 00:18:54.240 Speed. 00:18:54.960 --> 00:18:55.680 Speed, it's that way. 00:18:56.240 --> 00:18:58.480 It's it's like their routine, so she doesn't have to walk as well. 00:18:58.720 --> 00:19:00.960 It's quicker, but if you're looking for a lot of people. 00:19:01.119 --> 00:19:15.119 Well, I think you bring up a good point about just the the idea of when your kids are younger and things, you are in a divide and conquer mentality because your time is limited between activities, work demands. 00:19:15.279 --> 00:19:19.119 I mean, a lot of times when your kids are young, you're in your busiest season of work. 00:19:19.359 --> 00:19:22.400 If you're a volunteer, you do a lot of volunteer activities. 00:19:22.480 --> 00:19:24.319 And so it's just it all compounds. 00:19:24.400 --> 00:19:44.000 And so when you d do start kind of settling out and the kids are not at home, and now you have this quiet time, I think it it takes a little time to get used to there's an adjustment, getting a rhythm, getting that back um where you are doing the errands together and you know, making that intentional time together. 00:19:44.240 --> 00:19:47.440 Because you know, you get you kind of get caught up in doing it all on your own. 00:19:47.680 --> 00:19:50.400 But you literally can go, oh, we can do that together. 00:19:50.720 --> 00:19:53.440 Yeah, it's like you're just those habits, making new habits. 00:19:53.519 --> 00:19:55.119 I guess hit us with another one, Dr. 00:19:55.599 --> 00:19:56.480 Another question. 00:19:56.640 --> 00:20:04.400 Um, if you could tell your younger married self to do some something differently or better, what would you share? 00:20:04.640 --> 00:20:08.720 In marriage specifically, or parent marriage or I would say more things better. 00:20:09.039 --> 00:20:09.359 Yeah, yeah. 00:20:09.599 --> 00:20:10.480 Younger married self. 00:20:10.799 --> 00:20:11.759 Younger married self. 00:20:12.000 --> 00:20:13.279 You were pretty much perfect, Dan. 00:20:13.759 --> 00:20:21.200 So I think you're uh this question is this question is um that's I would say there's this guy named Tim. 00:20:21.279 --> 00:20:22.240 You need to go talk to him. 00:20:22.400 --> 00:20:22.559 Yeah. 00:20:23.119 --> 00:20:24.160 I'm pretty intentional. 00:20:25.440 --> 00:20:27.119 Tim was intentional for sure. 00:20:27.440 --> 00:20:27.759 Yeah. 00:20:28.079 --> 00:20:28.799 That's a hard one. 00:20:29.039 --> 00:20:29.599 That's a hard one. 00:20:29.759 --> 00:20:32.960 Can we think of anything that we wish they could change, or maybe about ourselves? 00:20:33.039 --> 00:20:39.599 Like, I definitely had a lot of hang hangry fights. 00:20:40.079 --> 00:20:40.880 Hangry fights. 00:20:41.039 --> 00:20:41.279 Oh, yeah. 00:20:41.599 --> 00:20:43.119 Eat eat before arguing. 00:20:43.359 --> 00:20:44.480 Yes, before, yeah. 00:20:44.720 --> 00:20:53.279 I needed some I I did develop some better like just understanding that this was not a me versus you thing. 00:20:53.599 --> 00:21:01.279 Like Yeah, I think it is true that I mean, because hangry to me means I I clam up and I don't talk as much. 00:21:01.680 --> 00:21:03.519 But which does not

be friends? 00:21:03.759 --> 00:21:04.480 That doesn't mix well. 00:21:04.720 --> 00:21:04.960 No. 00:21:05.200 --> 00:21:10.960 Yeah, so I was waiting for you to say what hangry was for me, but you you chose the high road, which I appreciate. 00:21:11.279 --> 00:21:11.599 Yeah. 00:21:12.319 --> 00:21:15.200 Well, her hangry is very different from mine, and they don't go together well. 00:21:15.440 --> 00:21:16.480 So that's basically what I'm saying. 00:21:16.640 --> 00:21:22.240 So eat something before you talk about it is basically uh I think that's a very good point. 00:21:22.640 --> 00:21:23.119 Have breakfast first. 00:21:25.440 --> 00:21:25.599 Yeah. 00:21:25.759 --> 00:21:28.880 Well, you had some on the last podcast, y'all need to go back and watch. 00:21:29.039 --> 00:21:31.519 The these guys have some great insight in that. 00:21:31.599 --> 00:21:37.839 But you mentioned wisdom's about um not like late at night or when you're compromised. 00:21:38.160 --> 00:21:41.359 Like you had like your prime time that you both want to talk. 00:21:41.680 --> 00:21:45.279 And so you're finding that balance and so thinking about this question. 00:21:46.240 --> 00:21:46.799 Yeah. 00:21:47.119 --> 00:21:49.839 Now that we're doing more of these walks together, yeah. 00:21:50.079 --> 00:21:59.359 I think I would tell myself that if we could figure out a walk together, that if we're going to have disagreements or maybe an argument. 00:22:00.240 --> 00:22:02.400 Or to have them outside of the house. 00:22:02.720 --> 00:22:03.680 Have them on the walk. 00:22:03.920 --> 00:22:04.160 Okay. 00:22:04.559 --> 00:22:05.839 Make the house peace. 00:22:06.079 --> 00:22:06.559 That's neat. 00:22:06.880 --> 00:22:07.200 And exciting. 00:22:08.079 --> 00:22:08.799 Maybe it's an idea. 00:22:08.880 --> 00:22:09.200 I don't know. 00:22:09.440 --> 00:22:16.480 I know in the past I remember you all sharing about how you deal with disagreements, and I know you guys were big textures at one point. 00:22:16.720 --> 00:22:21.519 Oh yes, we didn't all financial discussions over email years. 00:22:22.079 --> 00:22:24.880 But uh because it was too charged in person. 00:22:25.680 --> 00:22:29.039 So have a have do it on the walk and have a kind barrier. 00:22:30.799 --> 00:22:31.839 These are our like trips. 00:22:32.160 --> 00:22:33.519 Make sure you bring something along. 00:22:33.920 --> 00:22:38.079 Life-changing and this is this is you guys are giving the life-changing advice today. 00:22:38.240 --> 00:22:39.279 Uh it goes back to love. 00:22:39.359 --> 00:22:42.640 Yeah, you need to love your spouse and uh try to do your best. 00:22:42.720 --> 00:22:43.440 That's all you can do. 00:22:43.759 --> 00:22:45.519 Serving them well, thinking of them before yourself. 00:22:46.000 --> 00:22:46.480 Look at yourself. 00:22:46.720 --> 00:22:47.359 Yeah, that's right. 00:22:47.599 --> 00:22:48.000 I love it. 00:22:48.160 --> 00:22:48.559 I love it. 00:22:48.960 --> 00:22:50.160 All right, do you got another good one? 00:22:50.319 --> 00:22:52.559 Yes, I'll kind of close us out with this question. 00:22:52.960 --> 00:22:57.759 Um it gonna goes back into our theme of wisdom and whimsy. 00:22:58.160 --> 00:23:03.039 And, you know, you've you've kind of shared already, Tim, um, a verse that means a lot to you. 00:23:03.119 --> 00:23:13.920 So it's kind of toss up here if you want to share more on the wisdom side, which would be a scripture that you just kind of anchor in, or on the whimsy side, like what are the ways that you just find that joy? 00:23:14.079 --> 00:23:19.680 Um, and maybe even share a story where you've, you know, it's been hard to find that joy. 00:23:19.759 --> 00:23:21.759 Like there's when there is a challenge, you know. 00:23:21.839 --> 00:23:34.640 I mean, yes, we want to be fun and things, but when there is something that's going on that maybe it's hard to find that whimsy, how do you how do you search for that and and find that other than writing a great short story that you did? 00:23:35.039 --> 00:23:36.880 So, but what are some things that you can do? 00:23:36.960 --> 00:23:41.519 And then what are some things that we can do as couples that will find that whimsy together? 00:23:42.559 --> 00:23:43.359 Multiple questions. 00:23:43.920 --> 00:23:45.279 Okay, so recap recap. 00:23:45.759 --> 00:23:46.400 Okay, recap. 00:23:46.480 --> 00:23:52.559 I'm sorry, my buffer is um choose if you want to share a verse or something on the wisdom side. 00:23:53.759 --> 00:24:03.759 Wisdom or whimsy, and then if we go in the wisdom whimsy side of things, um, what is something that we can be doing as couples to create more whimsy or create that. 00:24:04.799 --> 00:24:06.720 Dan, do you have any thoughts? 00:24:07.920 --> 00:24:12.720 I was just trying to think like the closing like wisdom or whimsy on that. 00:24:13.119 --> 00:24:23.440 Well, I'm not so sure about wisdom, but on the on the whimsy side, I think it is important to find what brings you joy as a couple. 00:24:23.759 --> 00:24:24.160 That's good. 00:24:24.240 --> 00:24:24.400 Yeah. 00:24:24.720 --> 00:24:27.920 And uh common ground on the I know for us we love the water. 00:24:28.160 --> 00:24:35.359 We love being on a boat, we like to see the sunset on a boat, we like the beach, we like some of those things. 00:24:35.680 --> 00:24:36.240 Water pools. 00:24:36.480 --> 00:24:44.799 We still have a sun at the house, but a good friend, a good friend of ours has um spicy Saturdays, and uh would love to have that at some point. 00:24:45.680 --> 00:24:53.920 And uh what is oh spicy Saturdays, Dan is so innocent, Dan is so innocent. 00:24:54.400 --> 00:24:56.960 But that's that's once the kids are completely out of the house. 00:24:57.759 --> 00:24:58.400 Okay, okay, gotcha. 00:24:58.559 --> 00:24:59.839 And PG purchase. 00:25:00.160 --> 00:25:06.160 But okay, but at the end of the day, I would just say that you need to find what brings you both joy very much.

00:25:07.039 --> 00:25:10.480 Lean into that, and sometimes that costs a little bit of money. 00:25:10.720 --> 00:25:14.400 Um we're on this earth for a very short period of time. 00:25:14.559 --> 00:25:18.720 So enjoy each other's company, serving the Lord together, having fun. 00:25:18.960 --> 00:25:19.359 Right. 00:25:19.599 --> 00:25:24.240 And um, yeah, so that would be my that's a great that's a great summary. 00:25:24.480 --> 00:25:45.759 Yes, I'm uh you might have more things to um add and things, but I wanted to share that brings um reminds me of you know, as you've always shared with our our marriage small group and things that if you you know you need to invest in your marriage when you're younger, so that when you are older, you're gonna have that rich marriage. 00:25:45.920 --> 00:25:50.160 And you all you give the illustration of the holding hands, so you want to share that? 00:25:50.480 --> 00:25:51.440 Yes, I love that image. 00:25:51.839 --> 00:25:55.119 Yeah, so we'd we would always start off the small group or several times. 00:25:55.279 --> 00:26:02.799 We started it off with this picture of a couple that's been married for 60 years, walking along the beach holding hands. 00:26:03.759 --> 00:26:13.359 And the thought is everybody desire, oh, what a nice older couple enjoying each other's company, holding hands, walking along the beach. 00:26:13.680 --> 00:26:19.119 Well, if you're not holding hands now, walking along the beach, you're probably not gonna be holding hands later. 00:26:19.440 --> 00:26:19.599 Right. 00:26:19.759 --> 00:26:23.039 Yeah, so uh it's important to do those little things now. 00:26:23.359 --> 00:26:23.680 Yeah. 00:26:24.079 --> 00:26:24.400 I love that. 00:26:24.880 --> 00:26:26.480 Let me hold my spouse's hand right now. 00:26:27.039 --> 00:26:27.599 That's so sweet. 00:26:28.480 --> 00:26:29.920 He practices what he preaches, yeah. 00:26:30.880 --> 00:26:33.119 I don't, I don't can't top that. 00:26:33.359 --> 00:26:34.079 No, that's good. 00:26:34.400 --> 00:26:34.880 That's really good. 00:26:36.240 --> 00:26:36.960 No, no, no. 00:26:37.200 --> 00:26:37.839 It was wonderful. 00:26:38.000 --> 00:26:38.480 It was wonderful. 00:26:38.640 --> 00:27:04.319 I was just gonna just the wisdom and Windsor piece is is wisdom is not necessarily always representative of um being like Tim referenced being the smartest one in the room or doing that, but you had just a really do you remember you were sharing with me about what wisdom actually is when we were reading through Proverbs and Ecclesiastes and that kind of thing. 00:27:04.400 --> 00:27:11.680 It was like the Oh, like because Solomon's kind of accredited with it and he was trying to be the smartest in the room and it wasn't enough to satisfy him. 00:27:12.960 --> 00:27:24.160 It's gotta be applied in a way that honors God and is about things that are eternal and that are fruitful, not just to to get to say you're the smartest one in the room, you know, kind of thing. 00:27:24.480 --> 00:27:27.920 Um that purpose, the purpose of life and all of that. 00:27:28.079 --> 00:27:38.640 So I just I think I hope our message has been um even with the fun QA, this was a great bonus, bonus conversation from earlier. 00:27:38.799 --> 00:27:49.359 But um the purpose of this is to encourage other people that we will have that contagious excitement and make marriage fun again, yeah. 00:27:49.759 --> 00:27:59.680 And um just invest well into that and um and you're enjoying things together, you're you're wanting good for each other. 00:27:59.839 --> 00:28:08.960 So yeah, and I think I'm thinking about the wisdom a little bit more on I think sometimes we need to make sure that we have our guardrails in our marriages. 00:28:09.279 --> 00:28:13.279 So have the fun, have the excitement, the whimsical things that you're doing. 00:28:13.839 --> 00:28:19.599 Um but you do need those guardrails, things that you commit to not doing. 00:28:19.839 --> 00:28:27.599 And for instance, with me, I won't ride in a car with another female unless it's my spouse, unless there's two females in the vehicle. 00:28:27.759 --> 00:28:28.640 So there's accountability. 00:28:28.960 --> 00:28:29.359 Right, right. 00:28:29.440 --> 00:28:33.839 You know, so I do think guardrails are super, super important, especially for younger couples. 00:28:33.920 --> 00:28:34.240 Yeah. 00:28:34.400 --> 00:28:35.200 Uh getting started. 00:28:35.519 --> 00:28:37.759 Just go ahead and figure out figure out how you're gonna do that. 00:28:38.000 --> 00:28:40.319 It doesn't have to be like an impossible thing. 00:28:40.400 --> 00:28:43.839 You can figure out and find that out with with with your sp your spouse. 00:28:44.079 --> 00:28:45.920 What is uncomfortable or comfortable? 00:28:46.000 --> 00:28:47.119 Maybe that doesn't bother people. 00:28:47.359 --> 00:28:49.680 So whatever works for you in that that regard. 00:28:50.000 --> 00:28:58.319 But thinking it through, I mean, yeah, we we had to do this when the kids first got phones, we had to do this when they got more freedom or they started driving. 00:28:58.400 --> 00:29:05.119 You know, you have you start tight so that you don't find yourself like, well, there's the edge to this, you know. 00:29:05.359 --> 00:29:06.160 So I love it. 00:29:06.720 --> 00:29:07.119 I love it. 00:29:07.279 --> 00:29:10.480 You guys, I have loved having you guys here. 00:29:10.720 --> 00:29:11.599 Thank you so much. 00:29:11.920 --> 00:29:31.440 As we kind of wrap things up, I wanted to um, because I I feel like just all the things that we've said, whether you are in a young season of marriage or in a, you know, a more mature season of marriage, you know, whatever season you're in, our verse for this season um just really applies where it's from Ecclesiastes 3:1. 00:29:31.680 --> 00:29:35.920 There is a time for everything and a season for every activity under the heavens. 00:29:36.480 --> 00:29:44.400 And I think that that just pulls everything that we've said today just all together and to just um very grateful that you guys came on. 00:29:44.480 --> 00:29:45.119 It's been all right. 00:29:45.200 --> 00:29:45.519 It's worth it. 00:29:45.680 --> 00:29:46.559 Tim says it's worth it. 00:29:46.720 --> 00:29:47.119 It is worth it. 00:29:47.279 --> 00:29:48.000 Tim says it's worth it. 00:29:48.319 --> 00:29:49.119 So much fun worth it. 00:29:49.519 --> 00:29:49.759 So good. 00:29:50.000 --> 00:29:50.640 So good. 00:29:50.960 --> 00:29:52.160 Guys, thank you so much. 00:29:52.319 --> 00:29:53.359 You want to do the closing with us? 00:29:53.759 --> 00:29:55.680 As long as we get to hear the whimsical theme song at the end. 00:29:55.920 --> 00:29:56.480 Yes. 00:29:56.799 --> 00:29:57.039 Dan. 00:29:59.359 --> 00:30:00.880 Dan did write that theme song. 00:30:00.960 --> 00:30:10.160 So if you want to hear that theme song, he has written a book and he's written the popular podcast Well Grounded Podcast theme song. 00:30:10.400 --> 00:30:11.119 Well, thank you, Tim. 00:30:11.200 --> 00:30:11.759 We're so proud of you. 00:30:14.640 --> 00:30:16.240 So there you go. 00:30:16.480 --> 00:30:16.799 Good times. 00:30:17.039 --> 00:30:17.359 So good. 00:30:17.519 --> 00:30:17.920 Good times. 00:30:18.079 --> 00:30:25.519 Well, as we wrap up things today, we always want you to be refreshed, be encouraged, and stay well grounded.