Karen Kilgariff and I diagnose each other's problems and discuss the dark genius of Michael Landon.
United States
explicit content


00:00:00one night when I was like 8 my sister is 10 it was summer time or windows were open and I heard someone walking in the Tanbark in front of our windows we live way out in the country so like nobody was ever around ever and we heard footsteps and panting outside our windows and I was laying in bed I was frozen in fear there's a man under my window. It was so scary and I see my sister cuz the the hallway went into like an L shape and my sister's bedroom was at the end of the hall I see her zip across the hallway like through past my door jamb and into my parents room and then I knew it was real cuz I was like oh shit and I run in there too and my sister's going to whatever my dad opens his nightstand drawer pulls out of switchblade flicks it open and goes stay here turned out it was a Golden Retriever and there was no one for him to stab but it was that kind of thing like he was fucking ready to party
00:00:55are you ready to party with Karen kilgariff on this episode learn about life love and if the dog lived I'm David Taylor and this is until I lose interest
00:01:18Karen kilgariff
00:01:20yes you are and I are both fans I just learned this of Little House on the Prairie a great show you watched it first run I sure did I was I think I was 7 when it was on TV it's like it was crazy about it is how dark it is like time we have to turn this off every time we both my sister I would both be sobbing that has a central character a pretty young girl go blind yes the fuck is that it's real life on the Prairie it was 50-50 so they kept it like
00:02:10you know that it but you'll be early 20th century was 50-50 liver dies at David's Charles episode Albert's girlfriend that gets pregnant and it turns out her father is rape and her father's only raping her butt is a rapist and then he loves slide it in there but the baby died shower the father was a rapist and the you know the girl is pregnant do the father and turns out her father's been raping her and it's like played for dark it's like really dark I don't know who else is going on network television 30 years before because the it started out that there was like a rapist in town and he was wearing like a harlequin mask it's so scary. It's so you have to watch it it's so scary now I can't remember
00:03:10to turn up yeah I think it was her father so she got raped and her father was like you are the center and you have to whatever and then it turned out there was this guy that was raping people I can't remember was the father or there was a harlequin like a combination of things but anyways shops on since you got pregnant with said he would marry her because they were like basically 14 year old boyfriend girlfriend and everyone is saying she's a slut in Albert's up with her and he was like a dumbass. Apparently had her first child age 14 for people in the Pioneer sino-french Albert that's a great favor cuz then that lets you really have
00:04:10we're watching the new show me the 32nd Little House on YouTube is somebody is compiled or edited down episodes of little house so that they're only 30 seconds long and I'm putting sound effects so when sad things happen to goes boys credible is that they got every beat of that episode they didn't there was nothing missed the play I would start on the plague episode if I was Ulysses Grant top 1 on YouTube so funny the show to get why it's so funny I guess but if you don't know the show I don't want to know you I go to hell just like that sitting slept either that's that to me it was like it was incredible because Michael Landon was just like he was a great great father figure he figured out what he did you on Bonanza he was like Little Joe and I think with little house they brought to him they wanted to DirecTV so I want a star and he was fucking phenomenal what's also you were going to
00:05:10Highway to Heaven not really I think I was too old by that point I was right at the right age Victor French by the way you who looks like I mean a Dead Ringer egg decorator for Victor French Brody Stevens Brody Stevens absolutely could be Victor French in a remix Audi I mean granted Brody's a little more ask maybe like you be like the Asperger best friend of the Angel but still what is Victor Francis from the chili. I wouldn't be surprised he was here that show too I really love that he basically anything we from you Michael Landon was just incredible heat will hear what it was doing and also it's kind of like he was get he was going to getting in kids heads because you could follow it is all very clear like these are all
00:06:10she's going to do the wrong thing everybody even Nelly's parents follow that her mother was such a cunt she was the definition of a Pioneer car is like such a put-upon nice guy and it's like good but he also was like a rich man that was ruled he was henpecked by the original like real housewives
00:06:37would like cry with no tears don't like putting her finger up to the bottom of why the mom was so pretty Karen Grassle was so pretty show is the Jewish version of what Christianity is that like in some sense the Charlie Brown Christmas is kind of like that either Schultz isn't Jewish it's like it's this weird idealized version of Christianity they're saying it's this clean and and well-intentioned and there's no dark side and there's nothing bad about this religion Aquinas wine is coming up to the stage and reading a Bible verse and it's like yeah
00:07:37who is Linus's voice to go fuc up Trump start of his abuse was before peanuts they used to have women do children learn what they still do with the Simpsons but peanuts use real children's voices the other day I was going to say if someone has to go and if a child because of Little House on the Prairie my sister and I made up a fun game because we have the same eye color as Mary and when she went blind so we used to do a thing where my sister I would pretend I was blind and she would walk me around Mervyn's and I would look up at the ceiling and pretend like she was a guiding me
00:08:37I doubt it because we lived in a small town so it would really know there's a new blind girl in the girls section of Marvin that was a we love to do that we thought it was really a we thought it was effective and then be my friend Casey katsky ended up marrying Boomer Adam and he was one of the sons on it and he was also blind at the high school or the number that it was the storyline for girls my age cuz Laura was still like little and in braids No Manley was a dude like his mask
00:09:24I don't Johnny Johnson that was the one where it's like that's where your name that's the one you're coming up with like at the Mill or something and he was like she just immediately fell in love with them but she was a girl and so he was like starting to date people around town and she was like so infatuated with him and then she eventually like took the braids out that was like Laura's big change into and then I'm fucking Rob Lowe and my first sale on like that unrequited love thing where she was just like being tortured by having to see manly everyday and him not regard
00:10:24Jesus a waste of his looks and she was pretty too that's kind of how it was like they couldn't have enough problems mining yes that's when they kill a Chinese men are the Chinese men died and then he finally leaves father grandfather was just work in explosives in the mine and you're like how did you any lived until 90 days matter was it like somebody they like a friend that they had it really just blew himself up and dying was Victor French and
00:11:24Victor French was on blue house too
00:11:28whatever he was a drunk and his wife died and then he got set up with a prim and proper woman at the town's rectangular glasses oh yeah and then no I don't think it was supposed to be evil and then yeah and then they ended up she like she wasn't into it and then she was into it
00:11:50I think it was the speed of it possibly was yeah might need to start doing a little house that I would completely on that have a podcast of people watching a complete sidetracked I was I was looking you up in the trailer or talk about heroes you were a big Jane dornacker fan it's not funny David last words are so funny she was like a tall hot woman for my impression like dude like in San Francisco all her and the in that era Jeremy Kraemer Jake Johannsen was Robin Williams was around then she was like one of the one of the best of that group
00:12:50already crashed once by the way and survived it and she did this on YouTube for the YouTube clip right now it's super funny it's really really funny so she's up there you feel real feelings and so you have to just kind of label things aggressively like label them as funny here's how I am going to touch on this and like and dispel the power that sadness has really really probably a true point. But it doesn't change the fact that this fucking video is really dark really funny cuz she's up there she's going to fucking traffic report and all the sudden she just kind of scream she goes copper there above the bay or something and they and they did hit the river and then and then there's a silent
00:13:50produce like we're not sure what's going on here what's she started as the traffic reporter on kfrc in San Francisco that's how I knew her and she there was a morning show called dr. Donald D Rose in the morning and this guy was like a classic morning DJ but he actually was legitimately funny and weird and we love listening to him on the way to school and so we all all Every carpool mom would let us listen to dr. Dawn and it would just be like he just had dumb names for the different cities around the Bay Area so be like this you know 80° and beserkley legitimate even funny this might have just been funny to you you know it wasn't exactly now everything everyone has to be dark but Jane dornacker would come in to do the traffic report and and legitimately crack up Donald dr. Don and everyone in the room and it was so
00:14:50I opening Lee empowering Lee amazing to me because it was a girl who was fucking getting the mic and destroying every morning and it just filled me with like that's what I want to do like as like a seven-year-old I was like I want to be like that I want to be able to do that because she wasn't it was just she was funny she was just doing the traffic but it's just kind of the way she was she just had like a cool style and apparently the people that knew her from stand-up said that she will anytime she would do a set she just like would destroy of anybody else she was just kind of like the funniest water
00:15:25I think she went into traffic reporting in San Francisco and then I got promoted to the big big time in New York. She died in that wreck but she apparently like it was one of these I don't think she died on impact I think it was like that's I'm not a hundred percent about that you know that the shuttle astronauts survive the explosion are you serious and then they drowned know clearly they are so what happened was they go up it explodes the the unit itself was Colgate you know is because they're switches that was flipped by the pilot which could only be done by human not an impact so it's clear they survive long enough I think trying to steer it but there's nothing steered and then it just hit the water in an incredibly high-speed email. Better that vote then to like the idea either one likes you know action movies Reverend people are in a car in drowning yeah that's the worst I have a hammer in my car
00:16:25I know because it's like that's one of my weird erotic and maybe go by the way it's probably a dream it's not about to literally worried about drowning but it's I dream of driving and I end up in the water you know if I have a hammer because they sell this thing where is emotions when you can dream dream symbolism and really you don't like it just reflects your inner most emotional story if you are driving along us and you go through a bridge and then you're in the water and that's like I guess I'm trapped by emotions yeah well thank God I bought a real Hammer so I can probably bring it into your dreams we are halfway you know when you're only halfway submerged you can open the door open the door bullshit II you crack that thing you're it's out of control its water and water pressure
00:17:25what about having this window Hammer which I have a cheap helicopter parts. On the air is so far before that so her poor little girl is but yeah that's terrible what did the husband died of cancer you know how old was that child will try to do the math on it and I think she would be like 5 years older than me so long I pie nothing you know now because obviously going through a trauma vulnerable she might have a thumb ring or two in my experience the girl that don't like me of coffee or something
00:18:25something not good or something though but yes apparently we all have watch Laos you guys close that's Irish twins younger Tewksbury close Jesus and then like we would we were total latchkey children so we were getting two fights after school sometimes it would be like drawing blood oh wow Hicks holes and doors like crazy brother. Same thing for 2 years and then we both went to Sac State the same here and suddenly she was like me and want to be friends so it's like she went through her kind of dark morose. In high school where I was like she's like
00:19:25friends that we ride this friend Brandon his sister was 2 years younger than us and what we realized around sophomore year is his sister was incredibly pretty and it just kind of there was a night Jennings who was really good looking and fuck every girl in school and then what happens as guys by Tamika senior they print out of girls who like freshman software so one day Mike called the house Britney was supposed to say Mike was going on each other for second day of school and talk to your sister and he's like oh no she's getting called out to the bank getting promoted to imagine our school I went to school that only have 350 kids so you crop it was your fucking town at to Petaluma was like at when I was growing up and referenced in before poly classes referenced in a peanuts Snoopy
00:20:25next North peanuts me Charles Schulz I used to golf at a course like we used to sneak on it at Carnegie Mellon we block on the 9th green cuz we bribe the groundskeeper with beer day to golf or is a terrible course but Vince and we brought him like a case of skunk to be early but we can see for a couple days we thought we killed him and he was at Pierre's incredible for like right mr. Rogers lived in the apartment at the top and it was like it's like Charles Schulz mr. Rogers even Hulk Hogan there like religious figures cuz you knew that when you were a child you know beyond ironing Hulk Hogan is Tiana Rd I can't remember what it was and it was some bit and I made this
00:21:25this parallel which I was so proud of and made me so happy which is a picture of Hulk Hogan like the famous picture from the 80s where the blue background and he's wearing his red and yellow torn up comedian and I brought that up and then I brought up a pack a package of Oscar Mayer wieners and they look exactly the same cuz his skin is hot dog colors, racism and then just the same color lab in college and it smells delicious and we were like Alex the nitrates is the hot dogs hot dogs the smell of hot dogs are there a cheap hot dog smells great I don't care
00:22:15I don't know why I just know what I've said I am strong like I'm a pro Holt Florida how to reseal there I was in San Francisco starting stand up I will admit that made me laugh too not the rape and murder of the girl not that it was that the judge gave him last words and it was like what do you expect he said to the fucking father because her last words were don't do me like my daddy did and it was like cool things like Petaluma was this Tiny Town it now it's kind of like a small was it from the city who can afford says it's all these people and so something like that
00:23:15there was just like literally no unlock their doors type of town it's like Everlast ever it's what you see on Forensic Files all the time or people I probably never happen and I always love to tell the story than one time anything big ever really happen in that town like in the seventies and eighties and I was growing up a lady got her purse stolen a guy tried to snatch her purse and run up the street and everyone on the street chased him and really is that is that kind of town is just like nope there's yeah they were like to go fuck yourself like cuz he was the fact that he was there and some people it was like word was out that like he's in our neighborhood and then they spotted him on that bus and those people got together and beat the shit out of that guy that's a beautiful things more than most women that I would say
00:24:15entirely true you view it as a sign of protection which I'll say is only dated girls like that people aren't apathetic when these days everyone it makes sense to me like you're never talking and it's like nobody wants to get sued nobody wants to get shot especially in Los Angeles a person of course that makes sense but I think this is sanity we live in these days people are so to themselves it's like oh that's somebody else's problem so so it should you view not wanting to fight as like a sign of selfishness but I have to say and I already told you this is stop fucking pointing finger at me but I was happy to fight he was like grew up with a brothers and sisters he fist fought all the time it was and they were kind of like
00:25:1550s gang style type of people me they were gang members back in the fifties it was just supposed to say yeah it was summer time or windows were open and I heard someone walking in the Tanbark in front of our windows we live way out in the country so like nobody was ever around ever and we heard footsteps and panting outside our windows and I was laying in bed I was frozen in fear there's a man under my window going
00:25:42it was so scary and I see my sister cuz the the whole way went into like an L shape and my sister's bedroom was at the end of the hall I see her zip across the hallway like through pass my Georgia and into my parents room and then I knew it was real cuz I was like oh shit and I run in there too and my sister's going to whatever my dad opens his nightstand drawer pulls out a switchblade flicks it open a ghost stay here was one of the golden retriever and there was no one for him to stop but it was that kind of thing like he was fucking ready to party we had it for breakfast it was just kind of understand that that's a that's a standard that's inside that it kind of can't exist in these days anymore or family there your two little girls yeah you come up with the knife and absolutely
00:26:42beautiful woman and weird she really was very pretty very smart too and we are going to find a spot and somebody cuts off and then I go like three cars down and park and it's not a big deal and then we walk into the fries and then she points the guy out he's with and she took the parking space and he's with his like kid and his wife and he looked me up and down and he was short and I think he was like maybe you could she said I was just like what the fuck I don't not going to fucking fight this guy over space fuck you go fight him but he looked me up and down and then I think he had the thought were yugos
00:27:21I don't want to get beaten up by a nerd I don't know what this guy's story is he's big I'm just going to walk away and he walked away I'm like we both walked away from each other you have to be fighting people everyday if you were going to fight over parking spot I know I know there's about it it's crazy you know what I was little was little my baby apparently they told the doctor so my parents at all I'd be which I don't know how to do that but my mom said he'll be a freak and my dad said he'll put up a flush it and they were both right so that would that got me out of a jam but yeah that it's sometimes girls want you to fight to prove something and it's like I got nothing to prove you're not that much that's what I forgot that it's not forget the most important. It was important but you know I didn't see him for 9 years because she's beautiful that didn't hurt it was like you just find the right person you're like I guess we're just going
00:28:21breaking up 50 times each other 3 times so your dad was married a total of six twice before other and then we never had kids with you those women and then then we had to get you no kids with her I was the first and then I get some stock and then that was yeah that's fiery to to divorce and remarry illogical for my mom describe my father so like I would confuse those two words cuz she would say both about him but that I've already start with exactly it's really confusing. Learned a lot of vocabulary is it was really forced on me
00:29:12she just quit
00:29:15like this year the settings are first or second week without teaching and your Orange County they just want to move your ass around for no reason she usually K through three I think that's kind of a different thing but still it's like teachings not fun it's not funny she totally makes nothing and she wow and she teaches in Novato and she's been doing it now for like 25 years but the funny it's just weird because she is really really good at it she's won all kinds of awards and you know whatever and she's really good at teaching kids how to be at school you know like that's kind of why she teaches kindergarten cuz she's really kind of strict but like
00:30:15shut your teaching in like how to how to follow rules how to help other people like what you're actually supposed to act like when you're in this room when your mom's not there so it's kind of does but she is not married anymore she has my niece Nora whose 8 long oh yeah I really didn't for you you were married I was that detail in my life was really hellish working there at the job is insanely stressful and my mom had just been diagnosed with Alzheimer's and everything in my life was felt like it was like breaking apart and that's when you just married little guy 32 or so.
00:31:15because my whole life had been she's the black sheep look look what Karen's doing what she's doing that like and coming from such a traditional Irish Catholic Family I was truly the only girl that wasn't married my answer. We talked about if their daughter wasn't married by like 26 it was really problematic they get real panicky like it they're very old school but still happens it doesn't my family and I think only one of my cousins has been divorced yeah it's like it's like old old school once was a legal for a while there I believe it did you see the Magdalene sisters know if you like fucked up stories to laugh at that is the most fucked-up basically in Ireland there used to be these like nunneries work houses that they would send rape victims and a grocery store
00:32:15call me broke the law all the sinner girls and they would have to go to these work houses called the Magdalene sisters houses and they were ritually abused there for years it's the crazy story and they just close them in like 1978 like this you're watching you're watching this movie and you're like oh my God this is beyond fat everything is so crazy this is so crazy and then at the end when they they bring up those like true life cards of like your office this woman actually went here and she's the one that wrote the movie or whatever one of the things like the last Magdalene sisters has closed and whatever year it was more like I couldn't stop getting chills of like Elvis has been fine for years you have to watch it's a really really good movie but it's very upsetting so do you have any you feel any link to Ireland
00:33:09I do I mean I do cuz my grandparents are both straight over there were a Time 2nd generation Irish Irish accent on New Orleans Accent on TV I'm like nobody talks like that sounds kind of like singing It's like Australian what sounds really up Nike no matter what they're saying it's like I'm coming over here and they give you a smack on the face it all sounds nice regret your ancestors were like just giving Michael j.fox a chance to do and Irish version of himself black soccer ball in Back to Future 3 is kind of in the middle of the one with the cowboys stuff just would and he would like it's on a train
00:34:09it's a great franchise they did they did everything perfectly in that first movie it's so good the first one so good that it's you give him the next to cuz they deserve what they deserve all that money because the first one so brilliant hundred percent I just rewatched it maybe 2 years ago and it 100% it holds up I watch one like 40 50 times cuz we got it on tape like at McDonald's in college where that in The Sound of Music and we watch both of those repeatedly constantly. And then he breaks the back you know the punt and then we laughed we both laughed about it it was like it's like a funny thing so yeah that's maybe it's something in the in the family
00:35:09is he like this life we are all living is crazy it's true and it's insane. I'm surprised that you did such the typical the cliche like I'm 32 going to get married now we had been dating for 3 years and he asked me if it was a surprise. I know I do like Christmas is your proposal of cheeses literally never talked about marriage until he asked me to marry him we never had one conversation about it ever I swear to God it was a relationship I mean like it worked in some ways but it but it also didn't work at all for me but everything else was so awful that I needed to have somebody to propose and you were you excited and happy
00:36:01I wanted to say no and I didn't think I could already talked to my parents like I was going down on one knee I realized every you have to say is everybody knows this is about to happen like the parents are waiting this is just basically like this is a foregone conclusion you can't fuck this up it's how I felt about it while he did and so did you think about saying no later or were you just going to like my dad was very sad when did you know that the marriages were going to go bad he said in every single instance it was before the marriage before the wedding yes yeah I think I wanted to I wanted to get my I mean this is ridiculous thinking in retrospect but my mom was halfway through her Alzheimer's Journey
00:37:01and so she was still aware enough to like know what was going on the cruise time well I think it was you all timers in your in your watch yourself constant Panic like she's there and then gone and comes back and then just torturous so I can it was like wanting to give her one little thing before she was finally gone which is not how you do permanent relationships like as much as I understand they're like as much as that's a lovely concept it's completely unrelated it's like what they say about suicide it's a permanent solution to a temporary problem I was like a lot of that heavy shit of my insecurities in my like what does matter what you want because if somebody wants you you're lucky to be wanted type of shit it was it was bad
00:38:01so you know I would say it's a bad foundation for a marriage but there's no good one there's no such thing as a good foundation for a marriage because that's the way it has to be and I think it's because my dad is very patient my mom was very you know when she was healthy she was very outspoken and she was very like you know she had two terrible alcoholic parents or she was very like mistrustful and she had all these issues in my dad just was kind of like I picked you and we're doing this type of thing and gave her a lot of rock and their marriage she she constantly told us how great my dad was and how lucky she was and how lucky we all were my mom said about my dad she said well
00:38:52I'll say this about him he never beat me
00:38:58that was like the nicest thing
00:39:01is like really she was there cuz they got married and she was that into what you said but then eating there then she wants to do it and she had me and then I think the time I got divorced that yeah my brother and then they did get divorced and put it so I don't know exactly when because it's very few minutes off and I'll know that you was kind of vague and then they they got back together who knows why the fuk dated and they remarried and then that was a whole thing and I might have been in here to my been 5 I've no idea and then he went away again and then he came back in high school cuz my brother and I were like grown and she's too with us but then at some point it stopped working cuz they were too big so dad was around and then so he was there like after I left high school and it just for the next 20 years until he died and she was telling me when I came back that
00:39:49the choose to have to tell him angry at Matthew good angry she was like you know I just didn't want to do it cuz he never would get angry because he felt bad I think he was the craziest thing cuz I know I'm incredibly good at getting people upset and my mom is way better
00:40:06and that's the thing as shocking as he shot a family dog credible but do you know what I mean do you think you know why are angry person but it was like I guess I don't I use a kind of a mystery till like guy yeah but at least so when he is the only answer to get sick I mean about harder than cancer but and then he's already a little squirrely with I think whatever he had his mother had Alzheimer's and it was clear that he was heading down that he would call constantly constantly and he be like your mother is going to kick me out she's like no I'm not she always was threatening but you know and then at the end is like a nightmare but
00:40:56but then she misses him now that he's gone who those around you say of course but I would not have expected that that was surprised her relationship was not great at all and I miss Mall the time because you get this it's a familiarity and there's a kind of like an adaptation to what to having something you it's like you kind of bond with a person so even if there's problems or whatever you say it's like the bond that you meant
00:41:31where are you I knew that was a major problem in the first time someone said when are you going to guys going to have kids and I made a fit this isn't good I have made a bad decision was that did you make the face because you didn't want kids or because you have a kiss you like that with him does he know that and you're surprised by a proposal and say there might have been Communications issues in their life like 6 months in he was completely Anon Communicator he didn't we would sit at the dinner table at night in total silence and that for me was torture because my family was like blah blah blah 24/7 my mother was a psychiatric nurse my father was an old Irish friend that I had 1,000 stories to tell there was never there was never quiet and so sitting it in that
00:42:31relationship in the silence I was miserable but I took it as he doesn't want to talk to me and so I have to do something to be better or more it was a terrible but it played on every insecurities that I had it was it was torturous that's what my mom said when she met my dad she said that she was David I used to think Still Waters Run Deep then I realize know there's some things are just still don't you guys get introduced we were together. How did you guys end up fucking it's a real question whatever. That's funny that that like that's what it comes down to felt so unattractive at that show because everyday I know I was like fucking boss so I was miserable I was never not drinking coffee I was never never didn't have a handful of peanut M&Ms mmm that man I was so far away from like when I was trying to be camera
00:43:31Freddy and you know a performer in a comedian I just kind of like I'm behind the scenes I don't have to worry about that anymore and part of letting go in that way made me think alike no one's ever going to want to date me so when this like hot guy from some other department like yeah I was like I know it's it's the terrible thing about having low self-esteem is it when things like that happen to you instead of being like we'll do I want this relationship is this the person that's good for me you're just like a fucking thank God because no one no one was coming to my door you know what I mean no one was showing up at the End Bistro, dating type of woman that even if people have been into it they would never try because they think I would like rip them a new one or just be me
00:44:31when you say they think it's more like they know but it's not actually always true is always true to you
00:44:41when was I mean to you I should know you were never mean to me that's the thing that was you were always very very nice engagement other as to equals that was shocking to me Angela's you know I was we met like I was not that I was relatively new and you're always very very nice and I found that weird
00:45:13I understand why I would I have that reputation and absolutely I just had no patience for idiots that's what it was that's what it was you have to accept that you know who says that assholes when you're like is don't know yet but the problem is is everybody else's problem that's why you're so funny is a very very funny okay now was he funny or was he just attractive I dated who was very pretty and very smart would always be like using a pretty funny I'd say I think you're very smart and very pretty and that is leave it at that
00:46:13I think that's the other thing to is because I won't love you into this but for me, D is like being funny is like being good looking to me for for that if you're not funny that's ugly to me is what I'm saying what's the Pervert I won't love you into this but I'm just saying I was about to say we as Comics but I but then I realized it might not be true for you oh yeah I don't care I don't care about you either I don't care about if somebody is funny they won't love you any experience it's like that's a very man woman split don't care but like
00:46:57none of my male friends are like oh enjoy being around her she's funny now they will say smart or cool if you're smart you say she's smart cuz you're excited little girl smart and if you're not you say she's cool because she makes you feel smart I guess I'm not sure exactly but like funny never gets brought up at so you found this good-looking guy who's fun that sounds perfect to me but the problem is that the problem is that he couldn't communicate anything and he didn't couldn't talk
00:47:33are there a lot of problems how old your mother when she starts getting Alzheimer's 60 she is like 66 or 67 your mother's kind of old it was now let me know it's early onset so actually no sorry that would be an accurate because she's had it for 10 years so you know she's now 74 so she got it when she was like 60. My mom is 73 I cannot imagine what that's like this horrible my mom my mother's mother is starting to get a little squirrely when she you know people too old to happens and she was her to get old is Alzheimer's Benny was essentially she lost her mind last year too and my mother was hurt because my grandmother being an asshole pressure personality fundamentally changed and it was like surprising to her
00:48:26yeah my mom said to and the real problem was first of all my mom is mom got Alzheimer's and then she lived with us so we knew what was coming down the pipe it was like you lived with a woman with all type how long it was like 3 years until she had to be putting all over you I was 7 I think 7 a.m. to watch someone go from like the fun grandma that would play Old Maid with you and you know sing songs and be fun times to like battling didn't know where she was a very very upsetting and then of course going to see her in a convalescent home which is really awful hers was awful terrible place I mean the whole thing was awful so when my mom got diagnosed like we all knew it was happening cuz she started repeating yourself a lot and kind of doing weird things this is just an old woman this is your mother the bottom line here is reality let me tell you how
00:49:26is right now and I'm no this from a psychological standpoint I know this from you know cuz I'm a woman of the world Sandpoint so yeah it was very very upsetting and she became like she wouldn't leave the house and we be like mine you got to go like maybe go volunteer or something cuz she was a retired at that point and she was I'm done I'm going to go I've been a volunteer down it and she always had this plan and she would never do it and then it was like then she would take her nightgown off and eventually it was just eventually it was she clearly has this disease fully and she does not know where she fucking is and she would click into an out of it so it was horrifying that's what you had elected the Sundown thing yeah where they get real agitated when it night time comes to a friend who was schizophrenic who got here with me and we didn't know what was happening and and it was like you didn't really know but he moved out here with me and then the demo the worst part was he would do this crazy shit and then we both laughed about the crazy shit and he would
00:50:26he's doing crazy shit he couldn't help himself man and you're watching him just go down a hole and it got worse and worse and I just kind of like wash my hands of it cuz I just didn't know what to do to do other than he who's playing himself but it was like the most terrifying thing was he would seem normal enough so you want me to tell us more about he walked to Venice one night and it wouldn't have been as he walked like to link and he said the other people live in the bushes with a homeless people am I okay I just assumed that you just think they would talk to him and it wasn't until years later I'm like oh those weren't actual homeless people that was Australia station normal some of the time masses moving to LA and I'm going to do what they want like you're out here or not you're not immediately supposed to turn into someone's nurse or doctor and be like well here's how are going to take care of you
00:51:26scarier than mental illness is fucking it's like someone turning into is basically what like zombie movies are about just like someone turning is like his personality just taking up a tech people go crazy that's the thing now there's a guy at the store who is schizophrenic and people torturing them like what are you doing and I and feel like why why David you're such a bad person and then it's cuz I guess it's you know it's when you meet crazy homeless people it's easier than only crazy almost a little it's like an old woman when you see the chef that's what so terrifying when you see what they were and then what they are but he would torture a schizophrenic person that person's a sociopath so watch your fucking back because lots of them at the store
00:52:26going to kick someone in the face that only has one leg like what the fuck is wrong they're like oh you loves and I'm like that's his illness is to me to when like the sicker she got the less she could mask things so her whole thing was always looking at my dad and going okay let's go home like she didn't want to be around me and my sister she just wanted to leave with my dad all the time you felt oh that's interesting like yeah that's funny cuz my guess that was a thing with my mom and my grandmother was maybe she thought was to you is she always thinking this and then this is going to be sad I probably will start crying a little bit but I for it at one point way way late in the game when it was bad
00:53:11my sister was putting her to bed and my mom looked up and was there like my mom and said you do know I love you both and like my sister said in this fucking second hand but the idea that she that's why that disease is so evil she clicked back and it was like old 80's mom came back grabbed my sister's arm and says you do know I love you and it was like thanks fucking. That we got that message because everything she was so hard to be around and so like a whiny which she never was like she was the most to gather badass mom that was literally just a cool she was very Joan Holloway my mom she was always just like a really all right let's go and like all the other moms love my mom and she's really popular and she turned into this
00:54:03sour Nagy weirdo that wouldn't listen to anything anyone said and was insecure I guess so but also kind of like just wasn't into us you know like was just like always looking my dad going I think it's time to go home she was very and she and she look at my sister and goes like attracted to him deeply is she is still alive now she looks like a sad baby bird like she had her eyes aren't open and arms are all you know like it's a her brain is completely swiss cheese so she's just laying there but she's actually on hospice she's on like the hospice has basically taken care of her so that she will. I was like you got cancer losing weight and losing
00:55:03and losing and ever you seeing Me Like Jesus man you got thin and then you get used to it but the last time I went to see if there was no getting used to it he was like a hot 6 for like a hundred pounds in your life is like an insect he like you could see every bone in him it was like we knew was going to die so we were saying you know I knew it and my brother do it and I'm like I'm going to go home you know I told him I didn't want to take the bill man's not going to go and so then I was like I was the Ambassador so that even then like mom is like I can't be I'm going I'm going home I gotta I'm sleeping here cuz I figured I don't want somebody else to call Mom and say dad's dad but it was like you're dealing at that point of late-stage hospice in the name all the nurses seen it all so they can tell you exactly what's happening there like 3 days
00:56:03he's actively dying and then he started making sounds and like you know weird shit and then you're like I guess this is it and then to dentist just sleep and then he was just done but towards the end we had the weird thing was that the brain stuff with your cuz he got very insecure and needy and it wasn't like he would it was just odd because he was always very mysterious very silent and all the sudden he's calling me a lot and it's like I did all those calls I felt bad about that but it says it's still your dad like he's still in the place that he's still in dad place just cuz he's sick now.
00:56:40write write an older brother he was around is like right come home he be like Grandma about my mom and my brother like we were like you know we knew not going to take a call from a person who was in this one position and is now being completely different because how scary is that it's like I don't even know who that person is my brother about this because I know you're not kicking you out dad she's not kicking you out she's not kick you out. Just lay down trust me call me tomorrow morning I promise you only answer I will answer this time she's not kicking you out and then I said you talked to Dad and Matthews know-it-all but he didn't talk to your brother about that it was weird it was like I think because it's there's a big difference is like 4-year difference and the relationship changed my mom and it was like
00:57:36it was like I saw him is like a young man be around for me when he was younger my brother when he was old so when I come home you be saying your brother's calling me a total because they was just there. My mom's bidding you know that my mom would say your brother's calling you at odeum cheap laugh
00:57:57and that was that was my family and then the old man finally died which was shocking my first thought was like I guess their marriage is finally over I was there I was I was I was in the room cuz I had to beat you know it's affected your
00:58:20Blake outlook on my phone anyway
00:58:23I mean I was 38 I don't know I'm 39 now like this is like recent no yes and no I mean one day I'll tell you is I'll get checked for colon cancer good cuz that's my father and my grandfather you know you know I guess my father my grandmother both you know it had Alzheimer's is my grandmother's definitely fucked up but I've never really worried about getting a tattoo just like what you got to do side surreal news for you and super bad news for me they have it every single day really this is like a clock know how would your grandmother when she podcast I just want to live I want to live
00:59:09before I go which could be any minute so how did you know is first happening she would just repeat herself like every 3 minutes so she would be like Karen I really think you should go you know change your pants whatever in a big I will Mama I'm just going to do this thing and then everything will be normal normal no more than the like it would be like almost to the minute I really want you to change his pants size I already told you so it when it started it was like you just think she's nagging you being irritating and that was the other part of like the guilt piece was me and my sister above really fighting with my mom before so it was we're even fighting her with her cuz she was such a pain in the ass and that she was just so repetitive and but she she was like to repeat herself but she also still has her old stance of like but I know everything and so you just want to like like we drive you crazy
01:00:09but then you know after while if you could see how you could tell she didn't know she'd already said it how long does it take before you realize this is something medical it was like between visits say I would say would be like 5 months because like I was home for Christmas and noticed it and didn't say anything and then when I came back for say Easter or something like that it was much worse and I had to sit my dad down and say she has it you need to go to the doctor stop pretending it's not happening so he went to the doctor and then the doctor said yep she's got it and did you tell your sister that
01:00:52get my sister Dee new I think my sister and I were talking about it like she wanted to be able to tell that I wasn't just did it cuz I was staying at the house and I was observing what their lives were like compared to 6 months prior and that's a big thing for you to be the one to tell you like I tell you that would have to be me with my brother and me it's like you know it's like it that's that's just the role I would have to play but also I think it was because I was kind of the quote on quote Outsider like I wasn't my sister was there everyday so she was as she was as in the denial process as my dad was because they were all scared shiftless it was like they were all seeing it and pretending together so I had to come in and go like what the fuck are you all doing realize he was doing weird ship and I was like I guess this is what he does but my friends visited her like that too too weird I'm like yeah I guess he is
01:01:54they're only weird it's like you know it it's not it's cumulative it's not in total so it's not like his personality changed overnight right would be like just a little things your drops here in exactly he had story where he was like you this crazy left New York and the story was just beyond insane it was like he thought he was on fire so he started screaming blood Christ and use it illegal sublet and he was screaming so much that his
01:02:23his roommate or never met him Hatchet Tire close into a rope and go from bathroom down to bathroom like on the 7th of the 6th floor shit cops are called in 4 minutes and it's at the Creed the cops show up and they're laughing when they see it you know and then they say what happened he said I recently became a born-again Christian we just got back into it and they said the cop ya covered in the copy of my mother did that you just got to learn to separate the doctor in for the reality and then they walked away and Cicero New York City and then it was like yeah it like you just seem like I'm waiting till it's story I laughed and laughed and laughed and we thought he would smoke bad pot cuz he gotten high and then that happens and then when it's a drug store is definitely was like that's the funniest Story I mean
01:03:16I told that story to so many people and then when I live with him I'm like this is not good and I told my friend about it she said does he dress in layers I'm like yeah little she said that's a symptom of schizophrenia I'm like he doesn't have schizophrenia will because that's like saying he has brain cancer the same thing exactly was he killed himself it was like I'm like I was felt bad about it but it was like it was like he got hit by a boulder right now I didn't blame him for killing himself it was like can you imagine it's a living hell too honestly believe you're on fire. You don't have to be a mess of rest your life so then you just did it
01:03:57you sent me a laptop to back that I loaned him back and I was like so stupid I'm like I didn't think about it and then I was like then I got a call from my friend we like a third friend in Orlando we grew up with and then when he called he called me in the morning and I was like I'll bring the stuff you know you're just like I just don't bring him his dad and then whoever called me and he's call me in the morning like that is not a good thing of how do you turn around in in normal life when you have plenty of problems of your own and all kinds of shit going on how do you pull yourself out turn around and be like like there was nothing else you could do that like you is if you were supposed to somehow manage it that's the thing yeah the people blame his parents who want him to deliver these parents like they should have seen something like no I live with them there's no there's nothing you can do
01:04:57you she was going to get it like that she spent a lot of time before she actually had it my parents went on a shit ton of cruises and vacations and now I realize it was my mom planning just like let's get all this living out cuz I'm about to fucking fall apart I'm pretty sure cuz my parents probably went on vacation I mean they never weren't going away when I was a senior in high school me and my sister were home alone all the time so big that I we call the cops on our own party cuz like kids from the public school came and were like you're always gone and at the time I kind of resented it or like they're so selfish what I realize now is my mom saw what happened my grandmother knew cuz she was a nurse that it was came down on the mother's side is maternal what are the percentages on the mother's side that mean it's is a dominant or recessive like
01:05:57therapists wear for a while I was going to get a test that told you whether or not you were going to get it and then I went to I so I talk to my therapist about it like for three sessions when I went to my neurologist cuz I have epilepsy seizure disorder whatever and actually much more likely like a washer woman in the Royal houses the raped washer woman's child still Royal still getting a piece of that royalty my neurologist said why don't do it live now like you live now like you have a little distant relatives of all time I love him so much he every time I go see him he's just like he's just clearly a very smart man but also like the way he explained it to me is just like
01:06:58do the things now that you would do if you thought you're going to get it like don't cash it ton of sugar and all the things are like technically you can prevent blood pressure walk everyday like certified says it it's anything that will cause plaque in your brain cuz that's that's where they say it starts from they also say that there is that they have they have a either like at them they have a pill that's coming that that it's in the works but they're just trying to figure out how to monetize it cost like Society too much money if like 80% of the old people are like shiting and babbling in the street it you can't have it probably yes exactly right there out living their brains essentially because most people that you know hit by trains when they are 52 or whatever or a grandfather died
01:07:58even got no affected there was no penicillin in white trash Pennsylvania Game fucking / Try To Live healthy because of that I didn't say do you I said do you try
01:08:15you're looking at me like I'm some sort asshole but I think it's it's it's a combination of things but I have been trying lately I went through like post-divorce I went through like basically I'm only going to eat McDonald's and lay on my couch for literally 3 years and I'm coming it was pretty great actually I don't want to be alone the rest of my life going to find someone else who likes McDonald's are you doing are you doing the Tinder thing like what are you trying to say people yes or no I agree with you there Tinder is for hot short people just like they're okay that's the worst part exactly so I don't want to look at I love to do my friends Tinder messages right right Adam it but like I'm totally awful ones
01:09:15crazy just because he's good-looking that it doesn't matter there was one girl who was a swimming instructor and I said I wrote I can't swim and I'm worried I might be black he was told to that and oh my God. Because what you learn as you just write the craziest stuff and I don't care I mean I did laugh at that but I'm more shocked than anything else but you learn that most people don't have good sense of humor and yeah my thing is I need to meet someone who I know she thinks the way I think and everybody on Tinder looks like the dumbest guy in your office like the guy that we know what's up with those people you're not using Tinder to your you won't like looking at your friends are choosing them
01:10:15just tell me you married one he likes me first I would not have picked him and I would not have thought that he would have text me actually likes you he didn't really end up getting divorced leaving that's kind of what happened because I didn't believe you did okay I think that's really expressing it in any way that I could tell like Siri rounding up all your family to say I'm going to propose to Karen in the proposed to do in a public place just to let it it's kind of beer you got to check in everyday I'm going to act like you like all women these are what the grand gesture guy or the guy there said a guy that's funny I dated a girl who was all about grand gestures and I'm terrible at them so they're not a bad day today stuff to though
01:11:15to be a thing that comes naturally so if it's like everything is a chore then it's probably that person and then I guess I'll sit and talk you know I won't stay silent to you
01:11:29eat you don't do $10 you spent three years eve McDonald's are you back are you back on the I've been I haven't I stopped drinking in 97 long time to smoke a butt but I stopped smoking pot like habitually I do that I do that off and on and of course that was a big part of that laying on the couch and eating it down. So that's I'm done with that too or you I am actually cuz it was starting to turn into like everything is terrible no not really it's POTUS change the comedy store because it's it's a lot less exciting cuz everybody so fucking baked but it's a different sort of mindset you know but they are able to do their brains don't work but they are the dude like simple tasks so I don't know TV writing some people can do that's it for you I should be the boss
01:12:30I am so compulsive like I just do everything compulsively soap smoking pot compulsively the cumulative effect was composed of what you say at the mall but when you addictively compulsively smoke pot the it really started to affect my it was it was making me think like you should not leave the house like it's there's no hope there's your disgusting don't go outside don't trust anybody everything is bad only bad thing is going to happen and then I just realized I was like okay I have stop doing this and literally one week later I was like oh Jesus that was 90% the pot just making me feel terrible all the time so then have you pulled herself out of it are you out there are you banging hurry out there that I mean
01:13:24what part of it is is giving stand up and being around mostly 28 year old dudes for the most part I just feel like everyone's Aunt I can see that I said I feel like that too or conkle Dave yeah it's like I'm like oh shit I got a hold of that happened but super olds, he's always kind of young so you can kind of kid yourself a little bit the ear look at the party with the kids and then I basically like I'm leaving at 12:30 I have to go you know to look at me like how do you know that I might cuz I've seen it 20 times I can't tell you how much like when people are getting really upset about like so-and-so got a deal and they're not funny whatever let's let's mark the date and we'll talk about this in one year and we'll talk about where that person is you can just go home the fuck down I've been through 20 cycles of this
01:14:24come to the store I'm like here's what's going to happen with her like Ben then they shut that happened like I cuz I've seen her when she was named this this and this so are you out there banging your not having sex with dudes now why not because I don't I have I don't have any confidence
01:14:43you don't need confidence to have sex look at my Approach To Love and life is not going to help me in this situation can you email me all this your efficacious approach your specific and yet to me active it works
01:15:08wait my my Approach oh yes that's fine with me I can have sex so why aren't you at it's not about confidence for me cuz I just can't know it's not me you can't say how the fuck would you know internal monologue which psych and every now and then then they arguing that I I see what the what comes out of it
01:15:40the confidence that I used to have this is really the bottom line when I started I started drinking when I was 15 so all the things that all places where I think I would have gained actual real confidence in dating or with men never stuck to me because I don't know how I got into half of those situations that I got into if somebody likes me or if I like them or if I ended up sleeping with them or they became my boyfriend or whatever it was all very vague vague memory of last night and so is like was I Charming how did I do it I have no fucking clue and so it's very upsetting to wake up is like a 30 year old and be like holy shit I'm actually at the maturity level in terms of relationships as a 15 year old would she be like in your 30s I mean I guess I guess so but I think
01:16:36I don't know I think it's such a different world out there the way people like just have sex almost as like a handshake is so different than when I was in my 20s yeah yeah that's new get the fuck out of here cuz it's not so it's this and not just the sex but like everything around like nobody like if you fuck somebody that's just what you did it doesn't mean that you're going to have a relationship or like them or it doesn't mean anything actually I mean I was going to buy it I was like that's you know you spent like 15 years drinking and presumably fucking important thing in the world to you and now it's like it's off the table now
01:17:36really do selling all this Tinder without it just seems very foreign to me and I just don't trust anybody or anything that seems to me like the most important I don't trust all that is all I mean really though it's a very difficult town to be like it usually like Comics or people that are funny that's probably a humongous fucking problem and then on top of that you I will meet people I'm like I don't know this guy just started talking to me and of course at the end when is somebody wants a job or someone thinks that I can somehow make their career better
01:18:32you think guys you think guys are trying to definitely have a minimum of three times I go out and then eventually what I learn is a date recently they want a writing job or they want to figure out when you get the morning job now
01:18:51work that way these guys still think you're going to get them work it just seems ineffective as a it's not a good plan especially for me because I hate them what I realized that's what was actually going on then I feel stupid and different people
01:19:14the guys how they must be new to Comedy if they think you're going to be able to help and you can't get a writing to their comics and do they think we just wanted to be comedy writers Karen Karen you're a dude such as you're a dude I mean this this is like this is like
01:19:40okay so you I wish you guys could see the look on David's face right now cuz he loves this so much you love this pain of mine it's cuz I understand the pain I've been through this pain and I'm surprised you're very very smart and I'm always surprised when somebody smart
01:20:00does he know something dumb gratifying the bad thing if I started developing not like Wally there's no way like whatever. I couldn't imagine that that would be anything it when we hit it off and they're like to be hurt when you're being used not hurt as much as are you fucking kidding me like this is something I have to think about now where is I would have never thought about the guy and then
01:20:49and then they finally right for TV obviously early and then you go out with them and then when do you realize this is not like a sex thing this is a
01:20:59different happen at different points different it was early each time it was like you know because also everything so casualties days early release days it's hang out it you know it's like let's go to this let's go to that like we're friends and then I'm like well maybe you were maybe he doesn't see me that way it's that whole thing where your kind of like for me it's trying to balance that thing of like I'm not sure when people I know that I can be very cold and standoffish show people are trying to extend themselves to me it's got to be hard to be a woman and be like as a nerdy ugly guy you learn you just learned that you're like oh I have to be very direct very early because it's the only way I don't get chewed up a motion because I was just seems right I like the river long time to be interested I think I'd lie to myself and then after like paying out 20 times like what do you think I like you know what's
01:21:59sorry I wrap myself up emotionally and like that's why I'm like fuck that I'm like do you like with a lot of girls would like you fuck I likely I'll ask them early and if a girl that's a direct question in her girl I'll do it every time but I do enough if a girl August I go to the guys you like Hawkeyes in like see later I walk away it's good to know but you know what a lot of girls do if they like Hawkeyes or you be paying to see what they say if a girl says I saw that guy was so good looking I'll see you later you like wait you listen you listen for it but you have to make yourself as a guy but it helps you your guy you retract they say no you walk away because a woman totally different ball game hard to be directing also have to receive which is kind of a woman's thing and her to be I think
01:22:50forgive me what to say back in the 90s but like in my day that being that way was more acceptable that era of like I mean and I was wrong it was that kind of a fuck yourself and people like I love her like that was much more common where is I think these days it's not it's not as societies become more feminized Friday's be as become more I don't think that was seen as threatening as much as I look at her go you know what I mean like she's doing her thing where is nowadays like easy you know it's that your intense I was like you work as a professional submissive
01:23:45that's really saying something if she says you're in town I wasn't beating up for a living and I'm intense I'm a sweet I'm a chemistry major I'm a nerdy sweet guy to keep saying like you're a nerd or you're uglier blow a blood but you absolutely have confidence because every girl I know is a bully to actually have that to get that real with a person that you are interested in this very vulnerable I know is like the real a real look there's a whole belief that Nerdist culture where it's like I was put on his belief no banana how was and tell her what is the Nerds that I went to college with the Carnegie Mellon the really really smart guys were fucking terrifying assholes my friend to what is 5 foot 2 and he had their some fucking school assembly
01:24:45it was in Maine and all white trash and he's talking to people booing music your dog bunch of gorillas and some dude comes out to him and says you really made an ass of yourself at their table and he said at least I made something of myself which is more than you'll ever fucking be able to say and then you walked away and it was like yep that's that's not like the cervix real nerds are like that like aggressive dicks bored just one entertainment I guess what I'm saying is you are you are strong enough and confident enough to put yourself in that vulnerable position in the first place and that's the place I can't get to you right now yes you can because this is really important to know
01:25:36you're not vulnerable if you're not really putting yourself there do you understand you trying to get laid
01:25:45relationship now it's look every relationship goes from sex to a motion not from a motion to sex I'm telling him I wrong I know nothing about your relationships but in my experience secure and telling yourself like what I was saying before like I did have sex for 8 years and after while your insecurities starts running the show so you're just doing stuff and you commit yourself over this reason but it's just because I've been sick for sure about the show you went to where Beau Bonneau showed up with Winona Ryder that's my favorite I wish I hadn't tweeted that because it was the bottom of the hill which is this awesome club in Potrero Hill and there's a band called Circus and we used to go see the
01:26:45hi my friend just fucking lead singer and they were super cool band there was just great and so it was their last show and so we all went and why was it their last show they were breaking up as a band just because I don't so the place was packed and there were two opening bands and the middle opening band was a guy named I think it was Gavin Friday this guy that was tweeting and answering those to eat it was a huge Bono fan and he was kind of like arguing me like so interesting story did you actually over here that whatever and I immediately got super pissy I was like who are you but it turned out he was just totally one of those kind of people that was like trusting story which I read it differently but anyway easy to do online if I have enough cups of coffee everyone's my enemy on Twitter which I had to learn the hard way that anyway so
01:27:44if I think it was a guy named Gavin Friday it was a it was a Irish band and they went second and then everyone still Cruiser casted to come on and I was sitting on top of a cigarette machine so I have this really awesome like bird's-eye view of the whole club the stage the front or whatever and I see Bona walk in with Winona Ryder and people as he walked up is pretty small Club it wasn't like in heat and is he walks up is like a long the bar people are turning and looking and then just turning back around which I love because it was so this is back in the nineties when Kurt Cobain you know everyone the worst thing you could do is be a sell-out you know the worst thing you could do is be a commercial success it was that whole mental of fucking you too so yes really we have to be but also it's a big deal San Francisco is the 90s ish is east of any of those places like they want to hate Fame and success
01:28:44more than anybody they hate Los Angeles you know they want they want their world to rule and it doesn't so anyway so everybody was like don't look at him don't talk to him don't go up to him don't ask for his autograph the entire it was probably 300 people nobody looked at him nobody said hey Vana or acted excited at all I I swear to God I went and there was an article about it in the paper that can that can be if somebody find it I think it was either in the chronicle or in the SF Weekly somebody that was also there Road a little article about San Francisco did it you did us proud you can or bottle the hell you did San Francisco Pride by not kissing Bono Zach walks in looks around sees that circus is playing either for their first or second song goes up to the owner asked for the owner the bartender has to go get the owner the owner walks up and Bono says put that second guy back up demands and his friends band goes on again cuz he missed their set anyway
01:29:44to see them and the owner said go fuc yourself and Bono turned around and stormed out with Winona Ryder and tell and I said I did not hear that cuz a couple people wrote said did you hear that conversation over and I didn't hear the words I saw the owner's hand fly up my son has mediately ran and told everybody else that's what the owner said so it's like on relatively good authority third-hand basically oh but it was literally the second Bono and Winona Ryder left the whole place went crazy it was the best thing I've ever seen that which was the reason I tweeted it in the first place it was just this crazy you know 10-minute moment Supreme coolness
01:30:34it like it was just all that so important Bato is though yes think about that if for people to be rude to you and then cheer themselves for like they are it's like that is it culturally massive figure to be so far along in fame and fortune that you think it's a reasonable thing to walk in and say put my friend back on like your Louie XIV here's a story about John Bonham you reserve a John Bonham was some was watching some bad and the drummer sucked so he gets on stage he beats the drummer up throws him off and starts playing the drums and everybody was like yeah jump on the plane at the show not like this mad man beat up with strange
01:31:16it's like the same vacation it's like anything you do you're the fucking so if you're Bono you were literally the semi already had that in until they were all the protagonist in our story's not everybody else but why does a protagonist in other people's stories to like the time I met Bono so it wasn't like a winning is because he wasn't there I'll give these people a free show he wasn't there to say I'll give you all the bond honest of by Bono and everyone's just going to suffer for it and these people it's their last show ever and I was like that is such a good friend but he wanted his friend to perform he didn't want to hug the spot like he just wanted his friend Victor no such a good friend and he's going to ruin the night of 300 hard-working Americans frame customers to Irish assholes
01:32:16they would punch the comic in the face of Dragon Ball that looks like your last shows over
01:32:27absolutely absolutely yeah that yeah I was in San Francisco briefly like a drowned
01:32:3499-2000 but I was just like in the stock in the tech world so I was there for 6 months it was completely not cool this boring I live there I think from 2000 really that's what San Francisco was like it was it felt like a big empty we lived in the upper hate the first year live there and then in the mission back in the mission was like you could truly get stabbed
01:33:15which is pretty cool I guess okay this Karen super interesting you cry that's always like I always loved that anything on anybody I didn't want I want tears I want some people yeah that's I love that soak up some funny some heart and we got to talk about something I love which is Little House in McDonald's over all this is a real winner of a podcast about to go get McDonald's if you want some and I can't do anymore you sure I just can't I can't afford it I'll buy it for you and you can do anything you want I got to get back to my I got to go back and get Cinder weight Tinder fighting weight this is not about your weight it's about trust
01:34:15it's a great weight loss meal is really you're not even the right stuff smack in front of the heroin addict and saying come on it'll be fun what I was, you were a couple years in our friend was an alcoholic and there was a bad one and nobody getting drunk in a long time and somebody was like all we got we got him drunk I'm like you know that's a bad thing right he's a truck they don't know he's a funny wrong and it was within 6 months he was out a comedy it was it was such a quick spiral down but every since I thank you so much I'm going to try to talk you into McDonald's after this yeah yeah that was Karen kilgariff follow her on Twitter at Karen kilgariff that's Karen kilgariff and listen to her podcast would be very funny Chris Fairbanks called do you
01:35:15need a ride which come to think of it could also describe the opening credits of Highway to Heaven as always my Twitter is at this David Taylor on David Taylor and this is Ben until I lose interest

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