TRANSCRIPT 🔗
WEBVTT
00:00:49.590 --> 00:00:56.710
Welcome to Transformative Living Radio, where we explore the power of intentional change for personal growth and fulfillment.
00:00:56.870 --> 00:01:01.270
I'm Andre Flax, your host and certified life and leadership coach.
00:01:01.429 --> 00:01:04.150
I want you to imagine you're on a journey.
00:01:04.310 --> 00:01:08.950
You've got a clear destination in mind, a place you know you're meant to reach.
00:01:09.109 --> 00:01:10.310
So you prepare.
00:01:10.469 --> 00:01:16.790
You study the map, you read about the terrain, you listen to people who have taken the journey before you.
00:01:17.030 --> 00:01:22.870
You even start collecting tools, better gear, better strategies, better directions.
00:01:23.030 --> 00:01:28.870
And every day you tell yourself, I just want to make sure I'm fully ready to go.
00:01:29.430 --> 00:01:31.909
I don't want to take the wrong path.
00:01:32.230 --> 00:01:35.109
So let me just learn a little bit more first.
00:01:35.510 --> 00:01:39.909
So you stay where you are, planning, preparing, perfecting.
00:01:40.150 --> 00:01:42.710
Meanwhile, time keeps moving.
00:01:42.950 --> 00:01:50.550
And deep down inside, there's a quiet voice that keeps asking, When are you actually going to start walking?
00:01:51.030 --> 00:01:52.790
Because here's the truth.
00:01:53.109 --> 00:01:55.430
You can study the path all you want.
00:01:55.670 --> 00:01:58.790
You can prepare for every possible obstacle.
00:01:59.030 --> 00:02:02.790
You can gather all the right tools, but the journey doesn't.
00:02:05.670 --> 00:02:13.030
And if you really stick with that, you realize that the journey I'm talking about, well, that's your mind.
00:02:13.590 --> 00:02:22.150
So in today's episode, we want to talk about one powerful tip: the difference between thinking transformation and being transformed.
00:02:22.550 --> 00:02:36.230
In this episode, we're gonna unpack why constant learning can actually hold you back, the hidden trap of preparing instead of living, and how to step into the identity that already has what you want.
00:02:36.629 --> 00:02:40.790
So grab a pen and a pad, and if you're ready, let's begin.
00:02:44.469 --> 00:02:49.110
Hello and welcome to another empowering episode of Transformative Living Radio.
00:02:49.269 --> 00:02:53.670
I'm Andre Flax, your host and certified life and leadership coach.
00:02:53.909 --> 00:02:55.990
Hey, let me ask you a question.
00:02:56.230 --> 00:02:59.430
How many books have you read on personal development?
00:02:59.670 --> 00:03:02.470
How many podcasts have you listened to?
00:03:02.790 --> 00:03:10.149
Or how many videos have you watched and yet there's still something in your life that hasn't shifted the way you wanted it to?
00:03:10.870 --> 00:03:12.310
Well, here's the truth.
00:03:12.550 --> 00:03:16.310
You see, most people aren't stuck because they don't know enough.
00:03:16.629 --> 00:03:20.470
They're stuck because they won't apply what they
Load full transcript
already know.
00:03:21.189 --> 00:03:24.629
You see, in our mind, it's very, very clever.
00:03:24.870 --> 00:03:31.110
It'll convince you that you're making progress when in reality you're just staying busy.
00:03:31.430 --> 00:03:38.870
You'll say things like, I'm working on myself, or I'm getting ready, or I just need a little bit more clarity.
00:03:39.430 --> 00:03:48.870
But what's really happening is this you're staying in a cycle of learning, analyzing, and preparing instead of deciding, embodying, and living.
00:03:49.110 --> 00:03:54.230
And the longer you stay in that cycle, the more normal it feels.
00:03:54.629 --> 00:03:56.870
Now let's take this a step deeper.
00:03:57.110 --> 00:04:00.790
Because transformation doesn't happen when you understand something.
00:04:01.110 --> 00:04:09.509
Transformation happens when you identify with it, when it becomes who you are versus not just something you're trying to do.
00:04:10.629 --> 00:04:13.269
Think about the difference in these two statements.
00:04:14.069 --> 00:04:22.149
Statement one, I'm trying to be more confident, versus statement two, I am a confident person.
00:04:22.389 --> 00:04:26.709
I'm learning how to express my confidence more consistently.
00:04:27.110 --> 00:04:39.110
Now the first statement is a statement of effort, and the second statement is a statement of identity, and your life will always move in the direction of who you believe you are.
00:04:39.670 --> 00:04:45.670
If you see yourself as someone who is, quote, working on it, you'll always be working on it.
00:04:45.910 --> 00:04:52.230
But when you shift into quote, this is who I am, everything begins to organize around that.
00:04:53.030 --> 00:04:55.509
So let me ask you something deeper.
00:04:56.069 --> 00:05:04.550
If you already knew the version of you who has the life you want, what would be different about how you show up today?
00:05:05.350 --> 00:05:06.629
How would you think?
00:05:07.270 --> 00:05:08.790
How would you speak?
00:05:09.030 --> 00:05:10.550
How would you move?
00:05:11.270 --> 00:05:19.350
Because that version of you is not waiting in the future, it exists as a state that you can step into right now.
00:05:19.670 --> 00:05:22.790
But here's the thing: most people hesitate.
00:05:23.350 --> 00:05:28.310
They look at their current reality and say things like, I'm not there yet.
00:05:28.550 --> 00:05:30.550
It doesn't look like it yet.
00:05:30.790 --> 00:05:32.550
I don't feel it yet.
00:05:32.790 --> 00:05:43.189
And without realizing it, they go right back to the starting line: holding the map, holding the plan, holding the intention, but not moving.
00:05:43.830 --> 00:05:46.629
So let's go back to the journey for a moment.
00:05:46.870 --> 00:05:49.030
Because this is where it becomes real.
00:05:49.590 --> 00:06:04.550
Imagine that same person still standing there, same destination, same desire, same potential, but now years have passed and they're still preparing, they're still thinking, and they're still waiting for the perfect moment.
00:06:05.110 --> 00:06:15.110
Meanwhile, someone else, less prepared, less certain, less ready, takes a step, and then another, and then another.
00:06:15.430 --> 00:06:18.310
They made mistakes, they adjusted.
00:06:18.550 --> 00:06:21.910
They've learned along the way, but they moved.
00:06:22.069 --> 00:06:25.030
And because they moved, they grew.
00:06:25.590 --> 00:06:28.790
So let's bring this into your life starting right now.
00:06:29.030 --> 00:06:36.790
Let me give you four practical applications that you can begin to use to start being versus seeking.
00:06:37.430 --> 00:06:41.430
Step number one is to define the identity.
00:06:41.750 --> 00:06:45.509
Now I want you to ask yourself a different type of question today.
00:06:45.670 --> 00:06:51.030
Not what do I need to do to get what I want, because that's the question that most people ask.
00:06:51.189 --> 00:06:54.390
And it keeps you stuck in action without alignment.
00:06:54.550 --> 00:07:01.830
Instead, I want you to ask yourself, who do I need to become to naturally have the life I say I want?
00:07:02.310 --> 00:07:07.030
Because your life is always reflecting back who you believe you are.
00:07:07.350 --> 00:07:12.390
So if you want a different result, you've got to start with a different identity.
00:07:12.629 --> 00:07:14.470
Now, don't rush to step.
00:07:15.110 --> 00:07:16.069
Sit with it.
00:07:16.550 --> 00:07:22.230
If it's confidence you're after, what does a confident version of you actually look like?
00:07:23.430 --> 00:07:24.710
How do they think?
00:07:25.509 --> 00:07:27.350
How do they carry themselves?
00:07:27.990 --> 00:07:29.830
How do they make decisions?
00:07:30.949 --> 00:07:38.069
If it's discipline, what does a disciplined version of you do consistently, not occasionally?
00:07:38.390 --> 00:07:45.430
Now, step one is about clarity, because you can't step into a version of yourself that you haven't clearly defined.
00:07:46.310 --> 00:07:49.990
Now, step number two is to claim it in the present.
00:07:50.550 --> 00:07:55.750
Now, once you've identified the identity, we're not going to put it into the future.
00:07:55.910 --> 00:08:01.990
We're not going to say things like, I'm working on becoming, I'm hoping to be, I'm trying to be.
00:08:02.230 --> 00:08:06.150
No, we're going to bring it into the present using I am.
00:08:07.430 --> 00:08:15.670
Now, I know for some of you that might feel uncomfortable because your mind is going to say, wait a minute, that's not true yet.
00:08:15.910 --> 00:08:17.670
But I want you to listen here.
00:08:17.990 --> 00:08:22.790
You're not lying to yourself, you're choosing a direction for your identity.
00:08:23.030 --> 00:08:24.310
You're deciding.
00:08:24.550 --> 00:08:28.150
This is who I am now, and I'm going to grow into it.
00:08:28.470 --> 00:08:36.789
So you start saying things like, I am confident, I am disciplined, I am focused, I am someone who
follows through.
00:08:37.029 --> 00:08:41.990
And the more you say it, the more you start looking for ways to live it.
00:08:42.230 --> 00:08:48.069
Because your mind always tries to stay consistent with what you believe about yourself.
00:08:48.549 --> 00:08:53.269
Step number three is to act from the new identity immediately.
00:08:53.509 --> 00:08:55.750
Now here's where most people hesitate.
00:08:56.230 --> 00:08:59.830
They'll define it, they'll say it, but they won't move.
00:08:59.990 --> 00:09:01.990
And this is where the shift happens.
00:09:02.149 --> 00:09:04.789
You have to act from that identity now.
00:09:05.350 --> 00:09:11.909
Not next week, not when you feel more ready, not when everything lines up perfectly, but now.
00:09:12.470 --> 00:09:17.429
Because identity is not built through intention, it's built through action.
00:09:17.750 --> 00:09:27.349
So before the day ends, I want you to make one decision, just one, but I want you to make it from the version of you who already has what you want.
00:09:27.829 --> 00:09:38.549
Maybe it's a conversation you've been avoiding, maybe it's taking initiative instead of waiting, or maybe it's showing up with the level of confidence that you usually hold back on.
00:09:38.870 --> 00:09:42.870
It doesn't have to be perfect, it just has to be aligned.
00:09:43.110 --> 00:09:47.750
Because every time you act from that identity, you reinforce it.
00:09:48.789 --> 00:09:52.629
Step number four is to interrupt the old pattern.
00:09:53.429 --> 00:09:55.189
Now let's be real for a moment.
00:09:55.429 --> 00:09:57.429
You're not gonna get this perfect.
00:09:57.669 --> 00:10:01.429
You're going to have moments where the old version of you shows up.
00:10:01.990 --> 00:10:06.229
The doubt, the hesitation, the second guessing, and that's normal.
00:10:06.469 --> 00:10:08.629
But here's what I don't want you to do.
00:10:08.949 --> 00:10:10.789
Don't sit there and analyze it.
00:10:11.110 --> 00:10:12.469
Don't beat yourself up.
00:10:12.709 --> 00:10:13.669
Don't spiral.
00:10:13.909 --> 00:10:18.229
Instead, I want you to interrupt it right in the moment.
00:10:18.870 --> 00:10:22.549
And the way to do that is to ask this one powerful question.
00:10:22.789 --> 00:10:28.709
And that is, what would the version of me who already has it do right now?
00:10:29.110 --> 00:10:30.949
And then follow that.
00:10:31.589 --> 00:10:36.069
Even if it feels uncomfortable, even if it feels unfamiliar.
00:10:36.709 --> 00:10:45.829
Because that discomfort, that's not a sign you're doing it wrong, that's a sign you're stepping out of the old identity and into the new one.
00:10:46.069 --> 00:10:53.829
And if you can do this consistently, not perfectly, but consistently, you're going to start to notice something.
00:10:54.149 --> 00:10:58.870
You're not just thinking differently, you're becoming someone different.
00:10:59.349 --> 00:11:04.069
Now, as we wrap up today's episode, I want to leave you with this thought.
00:11:04.389 --> 00:11:12.789
The journey you've been thinking about, planning for, preparing for, it's not waiting for more knowledge, it's waiting for you.
00:11:13.110 --> 00:11:18.069
The step you've been delaying is the step that changes everything.
00:11:18.389 --> 00:11:22.229
So, with that, here's the question I want you to sit with today.
00:11:22.870 --> 00:11:27.429
Where in my life am I still preparing instead of walking?
00:11:27.669 --> 00:11:31.669
And once you find that answer, take the step.
00:11:31.990 --> 00:11:39.189
And if you haven't already, make sure you download my free ebook entitled Standing in Your Own Authority.
00:11:39.349 --> 00:11:42.229
You can find the link in today's show notes.
00:11:42.469 --> 00:11:48.309
It's going to help you deepen this work and truly begin leading your life from within.
00:11:49.110 --> 00:11:58.229
So until the next time, keep growing, keep leading, and most importantly, stop waiting to become and start being.
00:11:58.469 --> 00:12:00.389
We'll see you next week.
00:12:00.870 --> 00:12:09.110
To experience a free coaching session with Andre Flax, click the link in the show notes or contact him at Andre at Transformative LivingRadio.com.
00:12:09.269 --> 00:12:14.549
If you enjoyed this episode, please leave a comment wherever you get your podcasts and subscribe.