Full Transcript for Stop Repeating Toxic Relationship Cycles (How a Medium Helped Her Leave)

perfect. Now I can leave work, go to this event for like an hour and then show my face and then leave and go home. and when I I kind of was excited. I go to the event, there's a bunch of people already there. I'm like it kind of already like started, everybody was chatting, and we're all standing there and this guy walks out and he's like starts talking to the group and he's like, Hello, I'm Joshua John, I'm a medium and this is how I work. I'm like, Rebecca Lynn: Like he was the entertainment for the party. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Yeah, yeah, and He knew the host of the party, I guess, like it was kind of like sh she was kind of like his surrogate mom, I guess. and I was like, What is happening? This is like so interesting. And he says Rebecca Lynn: Especially your Mormon upbringing too. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: yeah, this is considered super evil. And so I will say that like when when I was a teenager, I moved out. I actually moved from Northern California to Oregon, where my brother was going to chiropractic school and I moved in with my brother up there. So I had kind of left the church at around in my teenage years, so like 18, 19, around that time, would pop in occasionally and you know, but I had basically shut myself completely off. Like I wanted nothing to do with religion, spirituality, nothing. It's like the Rebecca Lynn: Okay. Okay. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: to me it was like all the same thing. And I felt like it was used in a way to control me. And I wanted nothing to do with that, especially after kind of the upbringing I had with it is how I felt. So Yeah, all of it off. Like 'cause it was all one big ball to me. So Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Like instead of diving into something else, you just shut everything down. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: I hadn't thought about, you know, looking into like mediums or any of the like I always thought that was so, so weird, so woo, you Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: know, like I, you know, I discounted all of those things. And so, you know, he comes out and he starts talking about how normally he will go around the room and he does what he calls drive-through mediumship. And he's like, I'll come to you and say who would you like to connect with? And I'll try to connect you with that person, then I'll move to you. And he said, But I'm gonna do it different tonight because somebody has been coming to me all day today, knowing that you would be here. So I'm gonna start on this side of the room with somebody who lost their dad or father figure early, whose name is Robert or Bob. And I just was like, what is happening right now? I I was like, I think that's me, but like, but what? Rebecca Lynn: huh. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Like nobody knew anything about anything about this about me. Like, I don't think anybody that I've worked with knew anything about my dad, you know. Yeah, Rebecca Lynn: Right. 'Cause why would they? Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver:

right. Like that's not really something you share. And Rebecca Lynn: No. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: I didn't like post about I was pretty private person with all of that stuff. And so he starts telling me all these things, my whole body was just vibrating. I mean, it was like the most beautiful feeling I've ever had in my whole life. And I know it was just I I'm I'm sure I was just bawling. Just I mean, it was he gave me all these really cool messages, all of these things about Like he gave me the date of my first marathon, which I knew when I crossed the finish line, I was bawling. And I knew my dad was there, you know? And my kids were there and they were like, Why are you crying, mommy? And I was like, I'm just so happy right now. So he brought up that date and he was like, he's like, he's holding like a a banner or like a congratulations or something. And I was just like, There's just all these things that he told me that I was just like, nobody knew any of these things, right? Like these are Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: not things that you share. And I was just so blown away by that whole experience. And as soon as he finished with me and moved to like the next person, I had to leave. Like that was it. Like I only had that one hour to be there. And if he would have done it the other way, I wouldn't have gotten a reading. I wouldn't have had that experience. And Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: I left there with this like, okay, now what? Like Yeah, I I I I was Rebecca Lynn: Yeah, what do you want? I'm listening. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: like, I have no idea of what any of this is, but I'm now In. I'm all in. You know, like I read every book. I took every class. I was just like, I need to figure this out. So right Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: after that, when I left there, I called two of my sisters. And because there were some medical things that I was also dealing with that he brought up. And I was supposed to have like MRI or something like that week that I was really stressed about. And he was like, he's like, you don't have to worry about that, blah, blah, blah. And it was so like. Crazy for him to bring that up. But I also at that point was like, I had zero worry about that. I just was like, and everything was fine, right? It was this. So I called my sisters and my little sister was like, that's not fair. I want to talk to dad too. And so I was like, Well, I'm gonna, I'm gonna schedule a a FaceTime then. so Rebecca Lynn: Yeah, with the sky. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: yeah, I'm like, I because I want you to talk to dad too, you know? And Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: And so I I scheduled a FaceTime. I mean, this was like probably, I don't know, 12, 14 years ago. before Zoom. And so I had scheduled this FaceTime where I was gonna drive into his office in Portland and then FaceTime my my sister so that they could be on the call too. And as I was getting ready that morning, I'd already taken the kids to school, I was home alone and I right before I left, I looked in the mirror and I was just like, Dad, please be there for them today, like you were for me. Like, please let them have this experience like that I had. And and so we I drive down there and he starts the FaceTime or whatever, and he immediately turns to me and he's like. I'm connecting with your dad already. Like your dad's coming through already. And he wants to acknowledge that today was the first day you ever prayed to him out loud. And I was just like, I was so shocked because I hadn't thought about that. Like, like I I'd never really like talked to my dad out loud. I talked to him in my head all the time, especially when I was running. That was like a huge time for me to connect with him. And I didn't necessarily realize it when I was doing it, that it was like a meditation or like, you know, that I was like, But it was just like my time in my own space that I would talk to him and that was the first time I ever did it out loud. And I just was like, okay, I'm I'm I'm all in. Like you got me. There's there's nothing anybody could tell me. Nobody knew that. Like there's nothing anybody could tell me to discount that experience, right? Rebecca Lynn: And it's interesting that, that he brought up the marathon then because like out of all of your life events, because Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Yeah. Rebecca Lynn: obviously when you ran, you were with him like a a lot, right? That's so cool. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Yeah. Rebecca Lynn: That's interesting. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Yeah, yeah, exactly. And and because I felt like I knew at that point that that my running was a huge part of my personal development. and it may it started to make me feel like myself again. Like I had completely Rebecca Lynn: Vietnam. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: lost myself in being a mom and and Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: and taking care of the household and working and being an employee. And that running became Rebecca Lynn: Everything. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: like the only place that I was myself. I got to talk to myself in my head and my dad and I'd I'd be able to just be a better person. mom in person when I would get that time. And so I did become like addicted to running. I started running, which is such a weird thing to say because I used to hate running. Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: but it because it because it was my only time for myself. And I think Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: that that as moms, we're expected to be all things all the time. And Rebecca Lynn: Every minute. Yep. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: every minute, whether we have a good partner or not, we there's a lot on us, especially in in like current economy and everything like we have to work, we have to, you know, do all of these other things besides just be ourselves that we're a mom. We have to be on all of

the committees, all the sports, all of everything, you know, and that there Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: you you lose your own identity because there isn't time for you also. and so that's really the I don't know why Rebecca Lynn: I was gonna say, okay, that's glitching for me too. I'm like, spirit, what's going on? What do you need to tell us? We'll get there. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Yeah. That's so weird. Yeah. Okay. so so yeah, I felt like that I wanted to say this too about when I was there with my dad at the at the medium, Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: he did come through for my sisters too. My little sister's always like, You gotta you gotta make sure they know. Like he came through for us too. So they all have their o their own separate relationships with my dad, also. Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: And that was really The beginning for me at the end of that, at the end of that medium FaceTime, my my sisters got off the phone and the medium turned to me and he said, There's one more thing I wanted to say, but it's private, and I didn't know if you'd want your sisters to hear. But is your husband an alcoholic? And I was like, Yes, this is the first time I think that I've like really admitted that even to myself, right? And it was like the beginning for me of everything. Like it, it was the the opening of my like the spiritual door for me and my like spiritual awakening. The opening of like divorce and ending a relationship and trying to figure all of that out and how to do this on your own. And who even am I at this point? That was that that was the moment for me that that was like the beginning of this. And I I mean, I was going through counseling and all kinds of stuff. And I had a lot of things, you know, kind of all line up at that same point where my my counselor had made some also some points about, you know, him being an alcoholic and stuff. And I basically was like, Well, I'm sticking it out for the kids, like. I'm gonna until they're 18, like I'm gonna stick this out for them because of the guilt of I want my kids to have their dad. I didn't get to have a dad. And I feel like a lot of like guilt that I would be the one And, you know, I think at that point I admitted in counseling about the our relationship. I mean, we hadn't really been in a relationship for a long time, right? It was like It was like just two people that lived in the same household that had kids together. And it was uncomfortable and it was but it was also easier than do than figuring out what to do next, you know? And my counselor was like, okay, so you're sticking it out for the kids. Does that mean you think that this is the best relationship to model to your children? And I bowed a Heart attack. I was like, no, absolutely not. I used to say that to my ex all the time, was like, so this is how you want somebody to treat your daughter. Like this is the relationship you want for your daughter. Because

I was trying to make him see like how like this is wasn't good, but he didn't want to end it. And so we just kind of kept going. And when when the counselor had said that to me. I was in my room like probably that same week, and all of this stuff with the medium and everything, this is all around the same time, like probably within months, weeks of each other. And I had this huge just knowing popped into my head that said, you know, if you don't end this, you're gonna miss what's meant for you. And I was like, okay, fine, like I don't know how to do this, it's too hard. And so that was it though. I just was like, I need to do something different. And so I started trying to figure out what that looked like. luckily, and I say luckily now because of how things went, but luckily he wouldn't go to counseling with me and he wouldn't try with me. So it made it like it gave me literally no choice, you know, but to end it. And Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Yep. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: if because I really feel like, and most of us I feel like this as moms is like, As long as there's any try on the other side, we'll keep giving even if it's not right. Right. Like we were just such Rebecca Lynn: Totally, totally. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: such incompatible human beings. Like, why? You know? And I think that that was part of all of this, all of these things at the same time, the running and everything. I started to to like myself again. I started getting into like astrology and all of those other things just to like, and I started learning all of these things about myself. And I was like, I like I like me actually. I don't Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: fit with you. And the more I like me, the less I fit with you. And and that's okay. Like, it doesn't mean there's something wrong with me. I don't have to keep trying to make myself fit where I don't belong. Right. Rebecca Lynn: Yes. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: but it was hard and it and it took a lot of time. And I, you know, light at the end of the tunnel, I met my current husband, and we started dating. And I was like, this is really cool. I like. I like him and he likes me and I like me even more with him. Like the version of me that I get to be in this relationship is my favorite me. Like this is so cool. I don't have to like tailor myself. I don't have to like be any of these other like versions of me that I've had to be for other people. And I just thought that was so neat. And so as we started like dating and stuff, I mean there's There's so many times that like we started off our relationship when we got serious that we started going to counseling. And because we were trying to figure out, like, okay, we are gonna blend a family, like, you Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: know, I have three kids and he has two kids, like we don't know how to do that. but mostly that's what it was for. It was like we don't know what we're doing. And so while things are good, we wanna have like a a safe place to communicate. And Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: That was probably the best thing we ever did. We would go to counseling every like week in the beginning, whether we had anything to talk about or not. And the amount of like trauma triggers that come up from prior relationships that have nothing to do with your current relationship is amazing. And so Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: these are things that that I worked on a ton. I mean, I still, I'm sure, have stuff that will randomly come up. But I work on this stuff a lot with the people that I work with. This is one of those things that I've noticed is a regular recurring theme, especially for women and especially like after divorce and stuff, is that something will happen later that will trigger something that had happened before. And it will be an instant feeling. Our whole like for me, it was like my whole body felt it. I'll give an example. This one time my husband went to like a music thing with some some friends. I didn't go. It was fine. Like I was gonna go snow shooting the next morning with another friend. So I was at home and it was fine. He he got home and he climbed into bed and he smelt like alcohol and cigarettes, like that smell where you can smell it in their skin, you know, like Rebecca Lynn: Yeah, yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: I was instantly livid. I don't I was just angry and it had nothing to do with him he didn't do anything wrong like you know Rebecca Lynn: Okay. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: like it was like no big deal but I had to like process that whole next day like what even happened like why was I so angry because I knew like how I felt and what had happened they didn't match right like I knew he was going out Rebecca Lynn: Your body and your brain. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: yeah I was like I knew he was going out. He he, you know, like he had a ride. He didn't like everything was exactly how it was supposed to go. So why did I have this weird trigger happen? And, you know, like in working with our counselor and processing, like, well, when was the first time you felt that? And it was like, that was actually like at 18 was the first time I ever felt Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: that feeling. With that first with my oldest son's dad. and and I could go right back to that second and It was like, okay, like that's not true for me anymore though. Like I'm safe Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: now. So every time something gets like triggered, I got really good at noticing when it happened. You still feel it. It's not like those feelings like don't happen. It's still I still would get that instant like rush of like anger, but I would recognize Rebecca Lynn: Panic. Yep. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: it sooner and I'd be able to go, this doesn't match. And then I'd be able to process it out. And The more that you can do that, the more that you can go, okay, I'm safe

actually. So this doesn't match this. And you can like release that. I did a ton of like meditations and stuff too, where I would go back. And a lot of the things that I didn't even realize were like, you know, things from those relationships that I thought were normal or, you know, were not so bad, you know, Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: because that's what every woman does. And it's like, Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: We we do these things to make sure that everybody's happy and fits and Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: but then when you go back you're like, no, that actually wasn't fair and that wasn't great. And and you give yourself the love and acceptance in that moment that you can kind of release those, that the triggers become less and that you they they don't affect you the same way that they used to. And and Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: it it's hard work when you are Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: in a new relationship and you know, like you're working through those things. But When you have somebody that is your actual partner on the other side of this, you are able to do it. You know, you're able to do that work. and and there's other, there's other things that like I've found that have been super helpful too that we that we use where it's like that negative self-talk, that voice in your head that like is like, you shouldn't have done this, or you're dumb, or this or whatever it is. We've gotten really good about you name that that that person and then you soon as they start talking, you tell them to stop and then you say three positive things instead. And it's like basically it's like retraining your brain and those neural pathways to to go to positive places instead of those automatic negative places for ourselves. Because when you zoom out, it's another exercise I use with a lot of my clients is when you zoom out, if you were, if you were to die right now, And you zoom out and you look down and you're watching like the replay play of this Christie body, Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: and you just be like, Man, that was so cool. Like that you survived this. That you did like, how cool was that? Man, you're so strong. You were a child Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: that had nobody paying attention to you or helping you. And you did that for yourself. You were a mom at 18 and you actually took care of your kid. I mean, like All of these things that we don't give ourselves credit for because we're we're so our perspective is so zoomed in Rebecca Lynn: Yep. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: with the now that we can't see ourselves in the way that other people see us or in the way that we should see ourselves. And so doing that like zoom out look of like these things in our life, I try to do it even for what I'm experiencing right now. And it's like, man, what you're doing right now is so cool. This new work and this and this and this, and and try to like have that different perspective instead of always seeing like where we're trying to go, what we still haven't achieved yet, what we still haven't Rebecca Lynn: Yes. Yes. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: healed from yet. And just knowing that like that's kind of part of the fun is like looking back and being like, man, that was a cool adventure. I don't know if I would have chosen that that way, but but wow, that was really cool. You know? Rebecca Lynn: I love that. Yes. my gosh. You're tapping into like a lot of the themes that I'm currently processing and and working on in my own life Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: I know. Rebecca Lynn: right now. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: I know when when we were talking the other day, I was thinking about that too. I was like, I wanna tell I wanna tell you all these little tips and things that I've been that I've been working with with a lot of my clients because it is those those are those pieces, especially after divorce, where you're like, okay, who I even am I as as my own being. And that's Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: one of the reasons why I love astrology so much, because you know, it's so nuanced and it's so cool to just like have this like this is actually like how I was made to be. I'm actually perfectly imperfect, exactly how I'm supposed to be. And that's beautiful, right? Like that's just such a neat way to be able to like view yourself, you know. Yeah. Rebecca Lynn: I love that. my gosh. And a few days ago you shared like all of the Scorpio placements that you have and it made me laugh because I'm the exact same way but Libra. Like I'm covered in Libra. it which is Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: guess that for you because you are like you because Libras are are just they're so beautiful with trying to make sure everybody is taken care of and balanced Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: and you see everything from everybody else's perspective to a point that you lose your own, you know? And and Rebecca Lynn: Totally. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: that's the one thing that saves all my Scorpio placements is my Libra moon. My Libra moon Rebecca Lynn: yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: balances my emotions and it makes me want to make the emotional thing fair and for For everybody, right? Like I want the emotional aspect of things to be fair and balanced. I don't want to be, you know, like I don't want to be a bully or you know. But Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: I I that's one of the things I think is so cool about all the placements, is like, okay. And and I used to be like, okay, when I was like younger, I mean, all of this stuff is like is evil in witchcraft, which is what I was told when I was younger. And Rebecca Lynn: Same. Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: it's funny because now I'm like, it's so the opposite. It's so like my my connection with Jesus. my connection with just like spirituality and the

other side and my knowing of what is is coming. I have so much more to me now because of all these beautiful tools that I get to use that I'm like, why was I ever like taught those things? Like this Rebecca Lynn: Arrived. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: is so beautiful. The positiveness that I feel Rebecca Lynn: Mm-hmm. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: and that I get to share, how is any of this that evil? Are you kidding me? Like I love it so much. Yeah. And and and I used to just think like, like, Scorpio, that doesn't, I don't know, like that's such a like a dark, evil sign. And I don't know. Like, I don't really, I don't feel that way. Like, I feel like I'm a very like positive and like emotional Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: and like deep person. The more I get to know about each of the signs. First of all, I'm a Leo rising. So my Leo rising and my Scorpio son are in constant conflict. My Scorpio wants this deep privateness, Rebecca Lynn: Okay. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: and my Leo's like, share it, share it with people. and so it's it's like this constant internal battle that I've felt my whole life. It's nice knowing that that internal battle I've been feeling my whole life is from Rebecca Lynn: Not made up. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: yeah, it's like, I actually can put like, this is why I've always felt that way. And it makes sense. And I'm actually able to give myself grace and like I can be outgoing and do the things that are expected or that that help me share this with people and still be safe in my deep little Scorpio emotional heart that. that what I'm sharing and stuff is is still safe there, right? Like I I've learned to kind of like work those things together instead of like Rebecca Lynn: Yes. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: bite and and feel like there's something wrong there. Rebecca Lynn: Yes, feeling like there's something wrong with you. And and Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Yeah. Rebecca Lynn: I find that especially with divorce too, right? Like Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Yeah. Rebecca Lynn: in your journey, in my journey, when you go through the divorce or or your experiences, whatever it looks like, even just a relationship ending, you think, okay, I'm unlovable, I'm not worthy, I did all of these things wrong. And yes. Yes, I know, I'm worthy. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Yes. the I'm not the I'm not worthy. I think because I I didn't really understand what unconditional love was my whole life because there was always conditions in in my upbringing my my whole life. Nobody has ever I felt like given me that, right? Until you have your own kid and then you're like, I don't want to mess them up. Like how like They're this like perfect thing and they're all so different too. You you have to know, like, I I know that like each of my kids is so different. I'm like, I Rebecca Lynn: Yes. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: had nothing to do with that little soul and that body. I just keep this little body alive and try to have but knowing their astrology now too, I'm like, man, I wish I would have known this when they were younger. It would have helped me so much in how I parented them because I'm parenting them from like what I needed and didn't get. as a Scorpio kid, right? And they're Capricorn, they're Aries, Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: you know, they're Virgo, like they're so different than me. And they need different things than than I needed. But I can guarantee that they will never not know that I love them. I always tell my husband, it's like we mess our kids up in the exact opposite ways that we were messed up. Right. So it's like so I was like Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: definitely that like I'm fiercely the the mama bear, you know. Rebecca Lynn: Yeah, yes, you're you're the Leo, right? Like the all of that. I Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Rebecca Lynn: love that. And I I think it's so funny because yeah, my girls are totally different. I have a a Virgo son with an Aries rising who's my four year old. So now when she's like, No, I do it myself, I'm like, There's her Aries coming out. And then when when my Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Yeah. Yeah. Rebecca Lynn: little Pisces gets emotional, I'm like, it's fine. She's just a Pisces. She's she's gonna be fine. It's all good. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Yeah. Yep. Yep. Yeah, exactly. my Aries daughter, like her and I just butted heads so much. I had read something at one point when I started doing astrology and it was like the Aries Scorpio mother daughter relationship is the hardest. I was like, I knew it. But it's so beautiful too. Rebecca Lynn: Like well at least I love her and I do that. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Yeah, it's so beautiful too because like now like she's an adult. She's 21 and it's so cool getting to know my kids as adults now too and being on the other side of it and have them get to know me as a person and Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: we're like, like I genuinely like these people. Like they're such cool people and I get to have this relationship with them. Like this is so this is so cool. Being a mom in this way is so cool. And I get to choose this. You know, like I get to choose this as their mom. And I think that we we don't give ourselves enough credit for that because we always are like, I should have done this or I should have done that and I should have done this. And yeah. Yeah. Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Yeah. Same way as the future. You're doing it the past too. Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: My Virgo boy, he's my oldest, he's the my least into like any of this stuff. The woo is like so not for Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: him. And I said to him one day, I was like, you know, you know, when you were little, especially because I had you when I was so young, you know, I I would have done this differently or this differently or this differently in this. And he goes, so you mean

because you now you know better, you would do better? And I go, Yeah, smart ass. And he's like, Mom, like you I never thought that you weren't doing a good job. You know, like I never thought that you weren't being a good mom or that you weren't, you know. I know, yeah. And I was Rebecca Lynn: Well. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: like, because it's hard too, like having having them have different dads. Like I felt so I felt like one when I would make one decision for for my other two kids, it would be in the detriment of my older son, you know, in when it came to like their dad or whatever. And I always felt this like there was nothing I could possibly have done right because in in one aspect it would have hurt these two kids, in one aspect it hurt this kid. And I just felt like There was nothing I could have possibly done to to do it right. Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: And I felt like though, after you know, after I left that relationship and I had this distance and time from that relationship and more time in my in my current relationship in this marriage, it became so much more clear like that those things had to be experienced. We have to experience those things to have that perspective, right? Like all the things I went through. are so helpful for me now because I can help so many other people that are going through those things. I've helped sadly, my husband and I have been like responsible for a lot of divorces. People are like, I got divorced because of you. And I'm like, thank you. because Rebecca Lynn: Yeah, you're welcome. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: they're like, you know, it just put shined a light on how terrible my marriage was by the way you treat each other and how you guys are at, you know. And Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: it's such a beautiful compliment. And it was one of those things Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: where it's like, I wouldn't know this. I wouldn't have fought so hard and tried so hard and worked so hard to have this if I didn't have had wouldn't have had the opposite. Right. If I wouldn't have gone through all of those other things. And Rebecca Lynn: Yes, yes. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: you know, our all all of our kids have I mean, it was hard blending a family. You know, it's hard when you your your stepkids don't like you. And Everybody blames everybody else for their parents not being together in all of these hard situations. But if you continually show up with love and as the person that you are, things eventually work themselves out one way or the other. Everybody experiences things that they're supposed to experience. And all of our kids, you know, thank God, have come out that other side where they have like a love and appreciation for our relationship and of have told us like, you know, thank you for showing us this type of a relationship and you've ruined us now because we don't want a relationship if it's not this type of relationship.

But to now I know. Now knowing like, Rebecca Lynn: Like good. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: okay, like we got to be the good example for our kids. Like we get to be partners Rebecca Lynn: So redeeming. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: to each other and love each other and show each other each other's kids what it means to actually have a partner and what you deserve in in a relationship. And so as hard as it was, it was so worth it. It was so worth going through all of all of the traumas and everything through through my whole life. I'm just like, man, I'm so grateful for for all of those things that have made me so strong and to give me all of the perspective that it, you know, that it's given me. Because the amount of people who go through divorce that like have come to me and just been like, thank you for being this example or showing us what love looks like or or whatever. like, man, so many people are living lives in relationships that are not good. And we just Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: think that that's all there is. Because Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: maybe it's not super bad. You know? And Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. And now Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: what would it look like if you had if you had to end it? Like how? How do you even do that? You you go through That's that I think that's the first piece. And I think that was the piece where it was like I got smacked in the face so many times with it was it was like you have to end it. Like you have no choice anymore because it was too scary to look at that I just could stay busy and I mean I was busy. So I could just stay busy with work and with the kids and I could just ignore this thing sitting out here and I could just keep going because that was easier, right? Like Rebecca Lynn: Yep. Okay. Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: easier. I used the excuse that it was for the kids, like you know, but to have to actually end this relationship, figure out where to live, like what to how to even function in normal everyday life, what to tell the kids. I put my kids immediately in counseling. Like I had the kids in counseling probably like a year before I actually finally was able to like tell them and end it, you know. because I needed them to have somebody to be able to talk to that wasn't me and that wasn't their dad. And I didn't know How else to do that? So I started taking him to counseling and you Rebecca Lynn: Right. yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: know. Rebecca Lynn: And and all of those little moments take so much courage. And I think what's beautiful is that like even in that, like right, you you kind of knew what was coming and and you kind of prepared the the foundation, you prepared the surroundings and even yourself, and supported so that you could take that brave leap and also like depend on, you know, the therapist to help your child through it or like the strategies that they've learned. And I think that's so beautiful. And it's it's so beautiful too, all of these other families that have maybe, you know, divorced or separated, because even looking at your journey and and the relationship you're showing your kids and all how now your three kids have this prime example. That's like three humans who now are gonna marry someone and make more generations, maybe Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Yep. Yeah. Great. Rebecca Lynn: whatever. And then all of these other families too are doing the exact same thing. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: And his and his two kids. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. yeah. And it's just this like it's literally a ripple effect of like one small change of you doing the hard, scary thing, and and leaping and and not tolerating this, you know, Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Yeah. Rebecca Lynn: and not staying s asleep. It really just it it changes the entire ocean, right? Like it it really ripples out. It's so beautiful. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Yeah, and I look I I think about that a lot. I think about, you know, I mean, and that man, look, if I would have if I would have been able to at any other point in my life, I just was like, I was depressed. I mean, like, there was times where I would have gladly like, if I didn't have my kids, have let myself die. Right. Like there was so many Rebecca Lynn: Yep. Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: really difficult, dark days in in my life. And I I think if I would have like thought, this is gonna be my life someday. I don't know if I would have believed it, right? Like I just didn't think I deserved it. I didn't think I Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: was worthy of having this type of love. Like, who was I to be able to have this type of love or this type of, you know, whatever. I just felt like less than. And Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: it wasn't really until like honestly all the spiritual things and like learning about like, we actually are all worthy. Just Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: our souls like this is what we're here for. We're all actually worthy. We just have to remember that and start putting it into practice. And the more you do Rebecca Lynn: Yep. Yeah. my Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: that, the more you believe it. And then and the more that the things, you know, start happening. I used to pray all the time, like, please let something happen so that I don't have to do the hard thing. Like just let Rebecca Lynn: Yes. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: let it figure itself out for me. Like, you know, like whatever it has to be. It was like I almost always knew I was gonna have to do hard things and I just didn't want to. I would have I literally would have rather died than to have to try to like figure out how to navigate. And it took me a long Rebecca Lynn: Yes. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: time. I mean, like that relationship was, you know, fifteen, sixteen years of like off and on, like that and I felt that vague obligation of like, okay,

this is my kid's dad. I have to do this for them so that they get to have their dad. Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: and it's really unfortunate. That I don't get to have a say in them having a relationship with their dad because I want them to, right? But it's not, that's not my Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: place. That's not my responsibility. I had to, that was probably the hardest thing for me in the whole not being together was letting him have his own individual relationships with them or letting them have their own. But the counselor had to actually like tell me like, stop facilitating. stop coordinating, stop forcing this Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: relationship. And I was like, well, but I want them to have a relationship with their dad. And she Rebecca Lynn: And yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: and and it was like, yes, he's not a healthy enough human to be able to have a healthy relationship with them. It's up to them. They're old enough now. Like they were teenagers at that point. And it was like they're old enough to have their to decide their own relationships with him. Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: And I had to step out of that and not take many more responsibility for that because It was it first of all, like I actually don't get a say in it. As much as I think I Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: would have a say, like forcing them to go and coordinating schedule, doing all the Rebecca Lynn: Yeah, yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: things to facilitate a relationship still doesn't make a relationship. Rebecca Lynn: Yep. Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: and stepping out of that, and they're all adults now, like that's their that's their own thing. But because that was one of my wounds, I wanted my kids to not have that same wound. I wanted them to have a relationship with their dad. And I didn't have that opportunity. And here they get that opportunity with their dad, but he's not giving it to them. And God, Rebecca Lynn: Yeah, yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: that that that's definitely was like the most painful piece for me. And Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: letting them have their own relationship there. but you know, I mean, that's that's been the piece where we've continually showed up for our kids, even when they didn't want a relationship with us. Because it's like we're gonna keep showing up for you because. That's our job as your parents and we love you. And eventually, you know, you're gonna figure out that we're pretty cool. Eventually, Rebecca Lynn: Yes, I love that. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: eventually I I it's funny. I was like, I can't wait for my kids to have kids, just even though like all of them are like, we probably won't. be because Rebecca Lynn: Yep, which is fine too. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: because I'm like, I just I want them to like have some of these realizations. The parent child relationship is so cool. Rebecca Lynn: It is. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: And I don't think that you can really understand like the depths of loving something and letting it go, like make their own mistakes and sit in their own suffer and still just sit there and love them and just be like, that's the hardest thing as a parent. Letting your kids like have any discomfort Rebecca Lynn: Yes. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: has been the hardest piece for me. And Rebecca Lynn: Mm. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: the older they get, the harder that gets because the the lessons are harder. But continually just showing up and being there and loving them no matter what, no matter what mistakes you let them make, you know, like that's just that's their journey on their own. Rebecca Lynn: That's the key to like not messing up. Yeah. Is like you will never Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Yeah, that that's it. Rebecca Lynn: mess up if you're doing everything and a like loving them, right? And you're doing your best, right? Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Yeah. I come back to that all the time. So when I give myself grace, a lot of it is like my intention, no matter what, no matter the mistakes I've made. And I've I've done some terrible things and messed things up and and look back and been like, Wow, that was terrible. I've my intention has always been good. I've never had an intention to like harm them or this or that, like My intentions have always been in the right place. My heart has always been in the right place. And I will continue to show up that way. And as long as I do that, I know it's gonna be okay. And I give myself that grace, like it's okay to mess up. Your heart's in the right place. And that's how you learn. And that's how you do it differently next time. You know, if Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: you don't make a mistake, you never tried. Rebecca Lynn: Yeah, and we're all still growing too. I feel like even just me, I mean, I'm I'm fortunate because I have like little ones where they don't ask me too hard of questions yet. But it's like mommy's still learning too. Like I'm still growing, I'm still learning. So like, you know, sometimes I'm gonna mess up, but like, yeah, I I never stop growing as well, which is cool. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: used I used that a lot with my kids especially through teenage years was like hey look like this is the first time I've been a parent of a 15 year old girl too Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: like I I'm I'm doing my best here like you know like help me out like give me a break like this is my this is my first time like I you Rebecca Lynn: Yeah, give me the cheat code that you want me to do. Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: know and it's also like especially as like kids like You know nothing different. Like your parent knows everything. They are they are Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: the they are the only thing, right? So you know no other

life or or anything different. And so I think it is like kind of explaining to them like that, like, hey, I don't know everything. Like I'm learning this too. Like I'm I'm a person. I'm Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Yep. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: a person too, and I make mistakes too. And I'm saying sorry, you know, like Rebecca Lynn: Yes. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: I can I can. Know that like I made a mistake here or I did this. And having the hard conversations with your kids at the most uncomfortable times, like has been probably like exponentially like one of the best things I've done because they know that it's like when hard stuff's gonna happen that no matter what, like you'll still be there, you know? Like you're not gonna ignore Rebecca Lynn: Yes. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: it, you're not gonna pretend like everything's okay or whatever. I would Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: still, you know, I mean, obviously like age appropriate you the way you bring things up at kids, but you know, I was the one person that like I couldn't handle the elephant in the room. So I would be the one to be like, okay, but we need to talk about this, you know, like I'm not gonna let this just fester. Yeah. I just Rebecca Lynn: Does anyone else see it? Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: can't let something fester anymore. I did that for too long. And so sometimes the kid would be like, I'm not ready to talk about. yet or you know, I don't want to talk about and it would be like, okay, just so you know, like I'm I'm here when you are, or if you want to, or you can talk to your counselor. I just want to let you know that like I'm acknowledging this so that there isn't this this thing out there that you're worried about talking to me about. If you don't want to talk to me about it, that's fine. You know, I Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: want you to have other outlets to be able to do that with, but I just don't want it to be this thing that you want to bring up to me that are you're afraid to that, you know, I want to make sure that yeah. Yeah. Rebecca Lynn: that you feel yeah, or that you feel like you have to face alone, I think, especially where you're Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Yeah. Rebecca Lynn: like, you're like it's okay, like I'm here. And I think that's what a lot of it is. Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Hundred percent. I felt that a lot growing up. I felt like all the things I felt or was going through were there was something wrong with them or something wrong with me. So I couldn't share those. So I had to go through all those things alone. And anytime Rebecca Lynn: Yes, yes. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: you would share something, you would get like you would get bad feedback or you know, and so you would store that. You'd be like, This is not safe anymore. And so you learn very quickly as a child, whether you're cognizant of it or not, who's safe and who's not. And Rebecca Lynn: Yes. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: that is, I think, probably like one of those things that I'm like, I want to make sure like that they d know that no matter what they do, like I'm I will love them anyways. Like, Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: yes, if you kill somebody, I will be mad at you. But you know, Rebecca Lynn: Not good. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: it's like it's but I understand like people are like, you know, like, your kid did this terrible thing. Yes, like people do terrible things. And that doesn't mean they're not worthy of being loved. No matter what. Yeah. exactly. Accountability. Accountability a hundred percent. 'Cause that's how you learn. Yeah. Rebecca Lynn: Yeah, yeah. It doesn't mean they won't be punished, right? Like we're still gonna like make sure they're punished. But yeah, and yeah, and yeah, everybody is is worthy of love and yeah, all that. I love this. Thank you so much. You have just been such this Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Yeah. Yeah, definitely. Rebecca Lynn: beautiful light. And I know we've talked like so much lately, and and there's so much that you've done just even today where you've talked about so many things that are just so relevant to what I'm going through. And it's funny because even the other day I brought up a dream that I had. And that's another Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Mm-hmm. Rebecca Lynn: aspect of what you do and how you help your clients through not just Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Yeah. Rebecca Lynn: like the astrology stuff. And and if you want to just kind of quick explain what Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Yeah. Rebecca Lynn: you do and how people could work with you too. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Yeah, so I do I think the biggest picture of what what I do is like transformation coaching, like transition and transformation coaching. It's helping people through transitions. whether that's, you know, divorce or changing jobs and careers, like Rebecca Lynn: Yes. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: any sort of like like that where you start to feel that even like spiritual awakening is a huge one that I work with a lot of people with because that was a really big shift for me. And it took me a really long time to come out of the spiritual closet. even after I was already Rebecca Lynn: Mm-hmm. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: doing a lot of this work. but I use astrology and I use dream work to be able to help people decode kind of what's going on for them. And so the astrology gives a really beautiful like roadmap of the energy, like your energy, the world's energy and a lot of things that are kind of happening so that you can kind of like get a a clear picture of of of the weather, right? Like It's not gonna predict things, but you can know like maybe I should wear a coat today or something, right? Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: And then the dream work, which is really interesting, is a lot of things are processed in our dreams. I don't think that any dream is like without

meaning. Every single dream has a meaning. It is the only time that our 3D world is turned off and our subconscious, our higher self, whatever, is is is free to run. Right. It's like it gets to it gets to tell you the things that it really needs to work with you. So like I've worked with a lot of grief in my dreams. I I lost a sister last year and I was actually really surprised with how much of my grief that I actually worked through while I was sleeping, which was beautiful. And and it was so helpful because it's like one of those things that like is so hard to know how to process in everyday life. because things feel so weird. But to be able to have some of those processes and Happening during my dreams was helpful really helpful for me. But a lot of what comes through in dreams, like I feel like there's so much that comes through, but I feel like there's a lot of like spiritual or higher self messages that are that are just coming through. And we just don't pay attention to them or we don't know how to understand them. And so I started, you know, writing dreams down and I started analyzing dreams and doing dream symbols and trying to figure out what dreams meant. And as I started to do that for myself, I started to notice I was working with a friend who was also doing this with me. And we started to notice that our dreams coincided with our astrology. Like they kind of like they kind of matched up and they made sense. And it was like, this is really neat. It's like our own lens to decode a dream. You use your astrology to like decode it because it helps you kind of get like a more specific message just from for that person. So we started doing Rebecca Lynn: Check. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: work where we were like, Taking people's dreams and decoding them using their astrology chart, right? And everyone was like, this is crazy. Like, this is so cool. Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: and we were like, man, this is so neat that we like kind of like kind of figured out how to do this. And a lot of what I figured out is like the astrology, like, gives you all of like the information about you, the energy about you. And the dream gives you kind of like the information of how these patterns and some of these things are like playing out in your life right now. And so you can kind of put them together and really get kind of a clear picture of like the things that you're processing or dealing with in real life, using those things together. So a lot of times we would be talking to people and they'd be like, well, I don't dream or I can't remember my dreams. So I so we were like, Well, I'm gonna set an intention and I'm gonna dream for you. And so I would take somebody's astrology chart and I kind of go through this little Sequence of intentions and stuff. And then I set that intention to dream for that person. And then I'll have a dream that night. I will wake up in the morning. I will write it down, everything, the feelings and whatever. And then I will, I'll do a couple of different things with it. First, I pull the person's astrology separate. And then I do a dream analysis separate. So just, you know, those two things. Then I do the third piece, which is I put those pieces together and I analyze the dream through their astrology chart. And so it's kind of like this, it's a huge process. and it's just been so cool and mind-blowing how much I can get through for other people, just setting that intention of letting something come through. And it's different because my dream style is different sometimes with different people. Like I will it's so neat. I will dream like from a zoomed out perspective sometimes with certain people, or I will dream as the person sometimes. I've noticed for different astrology charts, I dream a little different. Like if it's an earth sign, I almost always have like a more calm dream, a more like stable dream. Rebecca Lynn: Yeah, yeah, like Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: And I wake up and I'll be like, that was not my dream, you know, because I know I know my dream. Yeah. I Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Can't relate. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: know I dream style. So I've kind of noticed some of those different patterns with like some of the different astrology. So I use those as like tools as pieces. for like the coaching and for the things that sometimes people just don't know what's happening. Or sometimes people Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: have like a recurring dream or or like or like a really bad dream that some Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: things that have come up recently or something that were there like I didn't even know this was something I was dealing with. It might not have anything to do with what you actually were dreaming. It might have to do with something else that's in your life that's kind of triggering of something before or a cycle that a pattern that maybe you need to pay attention to right then. And so I do the same thing. I can take your dream and analyze it in and you know for you with your astrology chart instead of you know it instead of me dreaming for you. And it will give you, it's like, it's amazing how like it can give you like just these little pieces of clarity where you can go, I see this from a completely different perspective because you're not in your own 3D emotion of what your dream was or your life. It's like this Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: detached view of it. And it it Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: it's like it almost just like, yeah, that makes so much sense. Like it just almost is like a way to recognize, acknowledge it, and like be able to like release it or figure out what you need to to learn or do with it. It's like figuring out those little breadcrumbs, right? Like whatever those like Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: pieces are that you're trying to put together. So that's Rebecca Lynn: my gosh. Kristi

Miller - DreamWeaver: That's what I do. I really like to take the the woo of things, put it together, make it make sense and make it useful. Right. Like Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: I I have a hard time with just like this like mystical woo for just for just being mystical. Like that is not me. I wanna know what it means and I wanna be able to use it, right? Like that is my Rebecca Lynn: yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: intention. And so that's what I, you know. tried to kind of use in my business and kind of put together in my business is those pieces as like tools to be able to like, okay, I'm gonna use I can use this to help myself right now with something that I'm dealing with that maybe I didn't even know I was dealing with, you know. but sometimes it does shine a light on some things that maybe you're like, okay, I guess I am, didn't want to deal with this yet, or didn't know Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: even, you know, this is I've had a couple of those where, you know, I've had to go back to do little like childhood meditations and go. give myself some like love and care that I didn't get and I didn't even realize it was things that I needed. And then I'll have a dream or have something come through that I'll be like, okay, I guess I'm learning to deal with this now. so yeah. Rebecca Lynn: Yep, that's yeah, that's where we were at the other day. So man, it's and it is nice to also like feel seen and validated and also like feel safe, kind of in the same way we were talking about with with our kids, right? Like to be Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Yeah, yes, yep. Rebecca Lynn: that person where, you know, your clients come to you, I'm having this recurring dream. I don't want to face it alone, or you know, I don't understand it. And having someone else just also hold your hand through that process as well. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Yeah. I've had a lot of those dreams where like they just don't feel good. You wake up and because the dream doesn't match necessarily what what what it is that you need to deal with, but the dream is so weird, like Rebecca Lynn: Yes. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: you know, like it'll be I'll have a dream with my husband or my ex or something in it, and and I'll wake up and I'll be mad and I'll be upset and I'll and I'll know it's not reality. Like I'll know Rebecca Lynn: Mm-hmm. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: that I I'll know that like he he he wasn't lost, like you Rebecca Lynn: Yes. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: know, whatever it was. And I it's like almost like I get this I have that like gross feeling. If Rebecca Lynn: Yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: I just leave it, I leave it. But I've learned that now I go and analyze it and knowing what it means, knowing what I'm trying what what I'm processing, gets lets me get released that feeling because that that my 3D brain, what that dream meant and what it actually meant and I'm trying to work with, don't aren't the same thing. So my 3D brain, when I wake up and I'm mad at him for cheating on me or whatever it was, you know, like, Rebecca Lynn: Yeah, yeah. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: and then I look and then I analyze the dream like, this was about this, this, this, and I'm ready to release that now, or I do a little meditation or running meditation where I kind of like process through that, then it doesn't feel I'm not mad, I don't feel it, I'm not carrying that with me anymore. I was able to like process through it and release it, which is like so, so much better than when you kind of have those dreams that like grip you and they just kind of keep. keep a hold of you because Rebecca Lynn: you back down. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: yeah, because 'cause you're keeping the energy of what maybe your three D connection is with that dream when it and it's probably not the accurate, you know, connection. Rebecca Lynn: so cool. Christy, I could talk to you all day. This is so fun. Thank you so much for sharing everything and for sharing your story and and all about what you do. I'll put all of your links for people to connect with you in in the comments and in the description. but thank you. This was so much fun. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Yeah, thank you. Yeah, definitely. It's been a pleasure. Yeah, definitely. Love it. Rebecca Lynn: Awesome. Well, maybe we'll have you on again and 'cause I would love to hear a a lot more about what you do and I'm sure everybody will be so curious. So thank you so much. Kristi Miller - DreamWeaver: Yeah, I'm putting together some some like classes and some things like that. So I'll come back on when I get all when I get all my ducks in a row. Rebecca Lynn: Yes. my gosh, that would be so fun. well thank you so much.