Full Transcript for David Amerland Navigating Uncertainty P1

at odds with what's happening among themselves, in their governments, in their commerce, all over the world it seems that we are, in and out of conflict on a daily basis. 42 00:06:17,133.97959184 --> 00:06:25,473.97959184 And you never, a lot of people say they don't even want to turn on the news because they cannot believe what it is they're hearing. 43 00:06:25,993.97959184 --> 00:06:43,18.97959184 I approached you because I knew that of all the people I could think of, you would look at it and give us, A much deeper look into what's actually happening, and I know you offer hope for where we can go from here. 44 00:06:44,38.97959184 --> 00:06:44,628.97959184 Absolutely. 45 00:06:44,668.97959184 --> 00:06:45,178.97859184 Yeah, absolutely. 46 00:06:45,268.97859184 --> 00:06:47,258.97959184 And it's funny how you said I'm going to correct you now. 47 00:06:47,468.97859184 --> 00:07:03,378.97909184 I'm not really going to correct you, but I'm going to say, like the 70s, right? Only a little bit more we have 70s, right? We had job insecurity, we had fuel crisis because OPEC at the time cut back, throttle back fuel or oil production and, fuel skyrocketed. 48 00:07:03,678.97809184 --> 00:07:06,878.97909184 We had rampant inflation across the world. 49 00:07:07,128.97809184 --> 00:07:08,948.97909184 The money markets were going up and down. 50 00:07:09,348.97909184 --> 00:07:12,328.97809184 We had East and West at odds with each other. 51 00:07:12,328.97909184 --> 00:07:13,478.97809184 We had the Iron Curtain. 52 00:07:13,748.97909184 --> 00:07:16,828.97909184 We had America and Russia at each other's throats. 53 00:07:17,98.97909184 --> 00:07:18,108.97909184 We had the Middle East. 54 00:07:18,308.97909184 --> 00:07:19,938.97909184 We had the Swiss crisis. 55 00:07:19,939.07909184 --> 00:07:23,488.97909184 We had it is the party nation. 56 00:07:23,489.07909184 --> 00:07:23,829.07909184 That's right. 57 00:07:23,969.07909184 --> 00:07:24,349.07909184 Yeah. 58 00:07:24,859.07909184 --> 00:07:25,409.07909184 We had that. 59 00:07:25,409.07909184 --> 00:07:27,59.07909184 We had terrorism across the world. 60 00:07:27,69.07909184 --> 00:07:27,89.07909184 Wow. 61 00:07:27,669.07909184 --> 00:07:33,339.07909184 And the Israeli and Palestinian conflict was still going on in some form with Arafat and the PLO. 62 00:07:33,669.07909184 --> 00:07:36,899.07909184 All those things have come back to haunt us, right? Like fashion. 63 00:07:36,899.17909184 --> 00:07:37,326.29337755 Yeah. 64 00:07:37,326.29337755 --> 00:07:37,753.40766327 Yeah. 65 00:07:37,753.40766327 --> 00:07:38,607.63623469 It's true. 66 00:07:38,607.63623469 --> 00:07:42,29.07909184 I look at fashion choices today, it's like I'm growing up again. 67 00:07:43,169.07909184 --> 00:07:43,899.07909184 Oh, yeah. 68 00:07:44,449.07909184 --> 00:07:44,729.07909184 Yes. 69 00:07:45,129.07909184 --> 00:07:50,239.07859184 It's much more and I think we need to address this a little before we move forward, a little bit more concisely. 70 00:07:50,629.07859184 --> 00:07:51,748.97859184 Why is it happening? Yes. 71 00:07:52,129.07859184 --> 00:07:55,569.07859184 And, it's the old adage about history repeating itself. 72 00:07:56,179.07859184 --> 00:07:58,169.07859184 But not quite the same each time. 73 00:07:58,369.07859184 --> 00:08:04,759.07859184 So there's a cyclical sort of thing in the way that people behave and essentially history is human behavior. 74 00:08:04,759.07859184 --> 00:08:08,109.07859184 Human behavior is driven by experiences, by knowledge and by memory. 75 00:08:09,49.07859184 --> 00:08:22,439.07759184 And it's no coincidence that in the 21st century, there are very few people alive who remember anything about the crisis of the second world war, or even perhaps what the seventies were like, because they didn't really experience it. 76 00:08:23,139.07859184 --> 00:08:25,829.07859184 And because we don't remember that. 77 00:08:27,9.07859184 --> 00:08:37,589.07859184 Our choices and our actions are reflective off mistakes, perhaps, or assumptions that were in effect before those things happened. 78 00:08:38,669.07859184 --> 00:08:43,119.07859184 I know this sounds dismal now, right? It sounds like we never learned, but this is not true. 79 00:08:43,969.07759184 --> 00:08:47,379.07859184 We may make similar mistakes, but we progress. 80 00:08:47,834.07859184 --> 00:08:49,834.07859184 We have different tools at our disposal. 81 00:08:49,954.07859184 --> 00:09:01,44.07759184 Case in point, this podcast, we have different ways of connecting to each other, have different ways of discovering what is our next step and how we should act. 82 00:09:01,664.07759184 --> 00:09:14,704.07859184 We have different ways of shaping how we develop, how we think, how we learn to maintain hope when everything else seems to be hopeless and helpless, and it's not, but that's what it feels like at times. 83 00:09:15,434.07859184 --> 00:09:22,14.07759184 So I think We can understand why we see these things, why we experience them now. 84 00:09:22,24.07759184 --> 00:09:38,334.07759184 It doesn't help us very much right now, but the moment we realize that it's part of human behavior, then we also say what has changed? What is different? Some things aren't, but is it really as bad as it seems? And the answer is no, it isn't. 85 00:09:38,854.07759184 --> 00:09:41,574.07759184 Why isn't it? Let's start with the elections. 86 00:09:41,874.07859184 --> 00:09:42,334.07859184 In the U. 87 00:09:42,334.07859184 --> 00:09:42,634.07859184 S. 88 00:09:42,654.07859184 --> 00:09:43,914.07859184 Because that's a thing. 89 00:09:44,224.07859184 --> 00:09:53,374.07859184 The key thing in most people's minds, right? As we head towards 2025, we're gonna have a trump administration that's gonna be probably as bad as we probably can think it's going to be. 90 00:09:53,624.07759184 --> 00:09:54,544.07809184 They're gonna be

four years. 91 00:09:54,544.07809184 --> 00:09:58,364.07859184 It's going to be chaotic, as chaotic as we probably imagined they will be. 92 00:09:59,374.07759184 --> 00:10:01,844.07859184 And we feel helpless and hopeless. 93 00:10:03,299.07859184 --> 00:10:09,279.07859184 And we feel lost, and we feel perhaps a certain amount of desperation and anger. 94 00:10:10,419.07859184 --> 00:10:11,889.07859184 Let's unpack all that now. 95 00:10:12,289.07859184 --> 00:10:18,569.07859184 Why do we feel angry? Anger is an emotion that we experience when something which we want to happen hasn't happened. 96 00:10:19,689.07859184 --> 00:10:22,949.07859184 Somebody hasn't behaved the way that we expected them to behave. 97 00:10:23,199.07859184 --> 00:10:25,569.07759184 Or a particular expectation hasn't been met. 98 00:10:26,299.07759184 --> 00:10:31,249.07859184 The moment we realize that, of course, we Realize how silly perhaps it is. 99 00:10:31,649.07859184 --> 00:10:34,839.07859184 We feel angry at something which we don't necessarily control. 100 00:10:34,849.07859184 --> 00:10:35,899.07859184 We don't control the world. 101 00:10:36,49.07859184 --> 00:10:37,179.07859184 We don't control other people. 102 00:10:37,739.07759184 --> 00:10:39,179.07759184 We don't control the weather. 103 00:10:39,429.07859184 --> 00:10:40,579.07859184 We don't control politics. 104 00:10:40,649.07759184 --> 00:10:42,759.07759184 It's not our job to shape anything. 105 00:10:43,559.07859184 --> 00:10:44,929.07859184 That doesn't mean we're helpless. 106 00:10:45,814.07859184 --> 00:10:55,464.07859184 On the contrary, and I'll get to that, but let's, that's why we feel anger, we feel despair and helplessness because again, we feel too small to move the needle forward. 107 00:10:56,94.07859184 --> 00:11:00,714.07859184 And in truth, we are an individual person can't really do very much. 108 00:11:00,774.07759184 --> 00:11:02,314.07759184 It's not really our job to do that. 109 00:11:02,354.07859184 --> 00:11:03,664.07859184 We're all trying to survive. 110 00:11:03,674.07859184 --> 00:11:08,944.07859184 We're all trying to maintain our own inner equilibrium against the everyday. 111 00:11:09,319.07859184 --> 00:11:10,559.07859184 Friction, we encounter. 112 00:11:11,179.07859184 --> 00:11:28,389.07759184 So then on top of that, we'll have to think, okay, what is right for the world? What is right for these things to happen? What can we do in, in, in that kind of context? And if we think about that, then we realize that perhaps there isn't very much we can do, but actually, again, this is wrong. 113 00:11:29,239.07759184 --> 00:11:30,229.07859184 There is a lot we can do. 114 00:11:30,359.07859184 --> 00:11:39,39.07859184 And I'll again, explain how and why, and, we feel perhaps help despair because we feel that the things we believe in aren't happening. 115 00:11:39,379.07859184 --> 00:11:40,889.07859184 We don't get to have a happy ending. 116 00:11:41,119.07859184 --> 00:11:44,759.07859184 We don't get to feel that the good guys won. 117 00:11:44,959.07859184 --> 00:11:48,669.07859184 We don't get to feel that right is not might. 118 00:11:49,589.07859184 --> 00:11:59,329.07859184 All the things that Camelot taught us, right? And again, this is wrong, okay? Because these, there are a lot more decent people in the world than the opposite. 119 00:11:59,539.07759184 --> 00:12:03,789.07859184 There are a lot more people who are committed to these ideals than the opposite. 120 00:12:03,989.07859184 --> 00:12:09,23.97859184 And it may not be reflective of the current reality, but there are reasons for that, which I will explain. 121 00:12:09,284.07859184 --> 00:12:10,414.07859184 Touch on in a moment. 122 00:12:13,214.07859184 --> 00:12:13,974.07859184 I have a question. 123 00:12:14,254.07859184 --> 00:12:23,144.07759184 Yeah, before you go any further, because I think this may have a lot to do with everything feels more. 124 00:12:24,844.07859184 --> 00:12:30,654.07859184 The word I want to use is immediate, but what I mean is. 125 00:12:31,554.07859184 --> 00:12:50,654.07759184 With this technology, with the fact that we have podcasts and satellites and televisions and everything, there is no Waiting period, in the 70s, it could take a few days before you learned of what was happening on the other side of the world. 126 00:12:51,134.07859184 --> 00:12:58,514.07959184 It could take a little more time to understand that there were earthquakes or wars or what have you. 127 00:12:58,574.07759184 --> 00:13:11,244.07859184 It was not immediate, but almost in The second that something happens, a rocket is launched or people go to war, or there's an earthquake. 128 00:13:11,804.07859184 --> 00:13:21,714.07759184 It has been transmitted around the world, and we are being bombarded moment by moment, almost in real time. 129 00:13:22,644.07759184 --> 00:13:34,34.07859184 Does that have, some bearing on how much angst there is? How much anger? How much despair? Absolutely. 130 00:13:34,34.07859184 --> 00:13:35,654.07859184 I'm very glad you brought this up. 131 00:13:36,174.07859184 --> 00:13:45,384.07859184 Now, we are, we have evolved to have a very high threat detection mechanism in our brain because that's how we survive. 132 00:13:46,164.07759184 --> 00:13:47,624.07859184 And this is survival bias. 133 00:13:47,644.07859184 --> 00:13:57,324.07859184 The ones who survive to pass on their genes through the ages are the ones who are very good at detecting threat, filtering out from the information, filtering out from the environment around them and acting on it. 134 00:13:58,384.07859184 --> 00:14:08,719.07859184 So let's say we take an average individual living perhaps in a state It's or living in Britain or living in any other country, and they get news from across the globe that are frightening. 135 00:14:08,729.07859184 --> 00:14:10,239.07859184 They are horrific. 136

00:14:10,249.07759184 --> 00:14:15,919.07859184 Perhaps it's a kind of information that we absorb. 137 00:14:16,529.07859184 --> 00:14:18,259.07859184 We try to put in some kind of context. 138 00:14:18,269.07859184 --> 00:14:19,949.07859184 It arouses our internal. 139 00:14:21,439.07859184 --> 00:14:23,559.07859184 World because we process it. 140 00:14:24,139.07859184 --> 00:14:29,289.07759184 Our threat detection mechanisms are activated, and then we think we need to act on it. 141 00:14:30,369.07859184 --> 00:14:32,879.07859184 And how are we going to act against perhaps? I don't know. 142 00:14:33,229.07759184 --> 00:14:40,869.07759184 Corruption in one of the South African countries and a massive earthquake that happened because of short building materials. 143 00:14:40,869.07859184 --> 00:14:41,149.07759184 I don't know. 144 00:14:41,339.07859184 --> 00:14:42,119.07759184 Perhaps in China. 145 00:14:42,739.07759184 --> 00:15:14,564.07759184 Massive earthquakes, a massive Disasters that nobody did anything to prepare for because they couldn't care less and we can't and what happens in that situation goes into increasing the worldviews we hold as being inherently unstable, which then makes us feel unsafe, which then makes us come out of our own house in a heightened state of arousal, prepared to pretty much be aggressive towards everybody because we feel threatened. 146 00:15:15,164.07859184 --> 00:15:21,754.07859184 And this is an unspecified, unnamed threat which we haven't been able to contextualize and deal with. 147 00:15:22,44.07859184 --> 00:15:23,124.07859184 And this is understandable. 148 00:15:23,384.07859184 --> 00:15:26,734.07859184 If we sit down and think about it and analyze it in ourselves, we'll say, okay, this is ridiculous. 149 00:15:26,734.07859184 --> 00:15:28,424.07859184 Okay, it's bad that this is happening. 150 00:15:28,454.07759184 --> 00:15:28,904.07859184 I agree. 151 00:15:28,914.07759184 --> 00:15:31,944.07759184 Nobody, nobody should have to go through that, whatever that bad thing is. 152 00:15:33,159.07759184 --> 00:15:36,469.07759184 At the same time, it doesn't impact on my everyday reality. 153 00:15:36,769.07759184 --> 00:15:38,459.07759184 And that doesn't mean I'm insensitive to it. 154 00:15:38,729.07759184 --> 00:15:41,39.07759184 But it means that, hey, I still have a job to do. 155 00:15:41,259.07759184 --> 00:15:43,19.07759184 I still have to be nice to the people around me. 156 00:15:43,249.07759184 --> 00:15:46,173.97759184 I still have to have the head space to deal with the world. 157 00:15:46,554.07759184 --> 00:15:54,284.07759184 With anything which is unexpected, process that and actually respond to that in a manner that is reasonable and if possibly kind. 158 00:15:55,684.07759184 --> 00:15:59,944.07759184 If we constantly live in a state of arousal, we're exhausted before we even leave our homes. 159 00:16:01,84.07659184 --> 00:16:05,174.07659184 Suddenly we get to

work and we're going to be exhausted by work, bombarded by whatever it gives us. 160 00:16:05,564.07659184 --> 00:16:09,704.07759184 We're going to be bombarded by the unexpected twists and turns of life itself. 161 00:16:10,434.07759184 --> 00:16:14,498.97759184 And then we're expected to go back home and in all that time in between we're consuming so much energy. 162 00:16:14,769.07759184 --> 00:16:20,229.07759184 Social media from across the world that is usually bleak because bleak news travels fast. 163 00:16:20,449.07759184 --> 00:16:23,659.07759184 Nobody's going to tell you something, it's great news because great news is local. 164 00:16:23,919.07659184 --> 00:16:25,649.07759184 It only impacts people locally. 165 00:16:26,99.07759184 --> 00:16:32,989.12809184 If I tell you, whatever, my next door neighbor saved three kittens from death and he's adopted them and he's feeding them and they're amazing. 166 00:16:33,159.12809184 --> 00:16:33,449.12809184 Okay. 167 00:16:33,449.12809184 --> 00:16:34,9.12809184 This is great. 168 00:16:34,19.12809184 --> 00:16:34,889.12809184 It makes me feel good. 169 00:16:34,889.12809184 --> 00:16:35,879.12809184 It makes him feel good. 170 00:16:35,879.12809184 --> 00:16:42,89.1280918 It makes the people around him to see that feel good, but it doesn't travel around the world because this is local. 171 00:16:42,959.1270918 --> 00:16:46,734.1280918 If something happens, which is bad, It may be local. 172 00:16:47,434.1280918 --> 00:16:49,394.1280918 But it goes global very quickly. 173 00:16:50,484.1280918 --> 00:16:59,274.1280918 We are hardwired to see these threats, to actually magnify them and project in, excuse me, in our head, because again, that's how we survive. 174 00:16:59,654.1280918 --> 00:17:09,814.1280918 So our inner survival mechanism makes it possible for us to see these things and think we need to take some kind of action, which we can't, so we end up. 175 00:17:10,609.1280918 --> 00:17:13,479.1280918 Living in a state of arousal, which is never really dissipated. 176 00:17:13,729.1280918 --> 00:17:16,69.1280918 So we're constantly perhaps fearful and angry. 177 00:17:18,729.1280918 --> 00:17:23,149.1280918 So it's a modern ill perhaps. 178 00:17:24,199.1270918 --> 00:17:26,619.1280918 And I use the word ill in a sort of very generic way. 179 00:17:28,414.1280918 --> 00:17:30,564.1280918 I don't specifically target social media. 180 00:17:30,564.1280918 --> 00:17:31,564.1280918 This is one mechanism. 181 00:17:31,794.1280918 --> 00:17:32,864.1280918 Technology is another. 182 00:17:33,144.1280918 --> 00:17:37,354.1280918 The amount of information we have to process on a daily basis is a third. 183 00:17:37,634.1280918 --> 00:17:40,904.1280918 All these things are pluses and at the same time they're minuses. 184 00:17:41,264.1280918 --> 00:17:46,584.1270918 And right now the minuses are accruing and the pluses are not very evident, but they exist. 185 00:17:46,594.1280918 --> 00:17:46,824.1280918 Okay. 186 00:17:46,824.1280918 --> 00:17:47,904.1270918 Let's make no mistake. 187 00:17:48,414.1270918 --> 00:17:50,394.1270918 So I'm not advocating let's take things back. 188 00:17:50,464.1270918 --> 00:17:53,124.1270918 No, but we need to find a way forward. 189 00:17:54,184.1270918 --> 00:17:55,774.1270918 So we keep this in mind on your question. 190 00:17:57,344.1270918 --> 00:17:58,384.1270918 So this is the kind of. 191 00:17:58,609.1280918 --> 00:17:59,839.1280918 picture we live in right now. 192 00:17:59,939.1280918 --> 00:18:02,339.1280918 We live in a world that's appears very bleak. 193 00:18:02,339.1280918 --> 00:18:03,829.1280918 Anything that's bleak travels fast. 194 00:18:04,129.1280918 --> 00:18:05,779.1280918 Anything that's bad travels very quickly. 195 00:18:05,989.1280918 --> 00:18:09,889.1280918 Anything that's false and sensational can take off before we even have time to process it. 196 00:18:10,989.1280918 --> 00:18:15,949.1280918 We know that information that's spread very quickly gains validity on its own, in its own right. 197 00:18:16,199.1280918 --> 00:18:19,569.1280918 And then it's very hard to combat because we have to really think about it. 198 00:18:19,579.1280918 --> 00:18:25,539.1270918 Thinking about it, analyzing it, doing our own research from credible sources is energetically exhausting. 199 00:18:26,359.1270918 --> 00:18:28,899.1280918 We're already exhausted by everyday life right now. 200 00:18:28,979.1280918 --> 00:18:31,829.1280918 Everybody's really tired and nobody has time to do anything. 201 00:18:31,969.1280918 --> 00:18:35,779.1280918 So we tend to accept things are bad, we're all going to die. 202 00:18:36,884.1280918 --> 00:18:38,784.1280918 We can't do very much about anything. 203 00:18:39,404.1280918 --> 00:18:42,4.1280918 And like I said, the truth is not like that. 204 00:18:42,324.1280918 --> 00:18:46,764.1280918 So let's break all these things down and say, okay, what can we do? Let's go on the bright side of this. 205 00:18:47,264.1280918 --> 00:18:56,524.1280918 First of all, what have we always done? Whenever we have had a crisis in the past, the crisis tend to be local mostly because you feel them. 206 00:18:57,394.1280918 --> 00:19:02,184.1280918 We find strength in those around us and the communities we're at. 207 00:19:03,584.1280918 --> 00:19:10,734.1280918 In order for we usually that happens because we tend to share the same experience which drives us together. 208 00:19:13,194.1280918 --> 00:19:17,404.1280918 Traditionally, this ability to unify has always been a super strength. 209 00:19:18,184.1280918 --> 00:19:23,894.1270918 Superpower is that can basically get together and be more together than can be alone. 210 00:19:25,434.1270918 --> 00:19:33,524.1280918 How do we do that on a daily basis? Now, here, when everybody's around us is afraid they are an edge. 211 00:19:33,554.1280918 -->

00:19:34,854.1280918 They overreact to things. 212 00:19:35,174.1280918 --> 00:19:43,284.1280918 If we manage to be stable in ourselves, and in order to do that, we need to process where our fear is coming from. 213 00:19:43,494.1280918 --> 00:19:45,914.1270918 We need to actually externalize it and articulate it. 214 00:19:46,214.1280918 --> 00:19:59,344.1280918 And if you say to yourself what am I really afraid of? And when you think about it, and your life hasn't materially changed in the last few years, despite all the changes in the world, despite all the bad things then your fear is something nebulous. 215 00:19:59,904.1280918 --> 00:20:04,819.1280918 Something you can't really articulate, but it's there! You feel it! I don't disagree. 216 00:20:05,679.1280918 --> 00:20:07,99.1280918 We're designed to feel it. 217 00:20:07,449.1280918 --> 00:20:14,744.0280918 At the same time, in a modern setting, we are capable of standing back, taking it out of ourselves, and feeling it. 218 00:20:15,234.1280918 --> 00:20:18,164.1280918 seeing it, recognizing it, and analyzing it. 219 00:20:19,74.1280918 --> 00:20:22,374.1280918 And the moment we do that this nebulous fear tends to disappear. 220 00:20:22,924.1280918 --> 00:20:23,834.1280918 It dissipates. 221 00:20:23,974.1280918 --> 00:20:27,234.1280918 You say, okay, I'm worried the state of the world is bad and we all going to die. 222 00:20:28,74.1270918 --> 00:20:40,584.1270918 And then you ask yourself, can I do anything really realistically about that? Do I run a country? Do I possess a military? Have I got access to, I don't know, super powerful technologies that can make everybody pay attention to me? No, I haven't. 223 00:20:41,254.1270918 --> 00:20:41,764.1270918 Fine. 224 00:20:42,274.1270918 --> 00:20:44,304.1270918 What's my superpower? I can smile. 225 00:20:46,219.1280918 --> 00:20:47,479.1280918 Makes me feel better. 226 00:20:47,849.1280918 --> 00:20:49,559.1280918 Makes the people around me feel better. 227 00:20:50,679.1280918 --> 00:20:53,849.1280918 And if I feel better and the people around me feel better, we behave better. 228 00:20:54,319.1280918 --> 00:20:57,49.1280918 And if we behave better the world can't be a terrible place, really. 229 00:20:57,814.1280918 --> 00:21:00,354.1280918 Sure, bad things happen, but bad things happen all the time. 230 00:21:01,394.1280918 --> 00:21:06,424.1280918 So this is a small strategy that has a very deep long term effect. 231 00:21:07,294.1270918 --> 00:21:08,694.1270918 It doesn't take much. 232 00:21:08,854.1280918 --> 00:21:14,974.1270918 It takes a little bit of, take a step back, take a deep breath, articulate what it is that you're actually worried about. 233 00:21:15,434.1270918 --> 00:21:16,44.1280918 Think about it. 234 00:21:16,54.1280918 --> 00:21:19,884.1270918 Is it real? If it isn't real, then, you can act accordingly. 235 00:21:20,184.1280918 --> 00:21:20,974.1280918 You acknowledge it. 236 00:21:20,974.1280918 --> 00:21:21,684.1280918 You know it's there. 237 00:21:21,684.1280918 --> 00:21:22,674.1280918 You know it's sources. 238 00:21:23,54.1280918 --> 00:21:24,214.1280918 You don't discount them. 239 00:21:24,304.1280918 --> 00:21:27,554.1280918 You don't negate other people's pain or other people's problems. 240 00:21:27,554.1280918 --> 00:21:28,334.1280918 No, they're there. 241 00:21:28,934.1280918 --> 00:21:32,304.1280918 But at the same time, you don't have to be paralyzed. 242 00:21:32,684.1280918 --> 00:21:36,74.1270918 You don't have to be angry to the point that you overreact. 243 00:21:36,554.1280918 --> 00:21:42,934.1280918 You don't have to be fearful to the point that you're constantly on edge and exhausted because you're not helping anybody in that state. 244 00:21:44,74.1280918 --> 00:21:47,724.1280918 So this is the primary survival strategy of the individual. 245 00:21:49,139.1280918 --> 00:21:53,409.1280918 If you have more in your tank and you say perhaps I can do a little bit more. 246 00:21:53,469.1280918 --> 00:22:14,389.1280918 What can I do? Then we just take another step and you say, okay, how do you behave around friends, family, works, workmates in your workplace? Do you try and be a beacon of, or a paragon of hope? You say how do I do that? How about being kind to people? You don't have to do anything super strategic. 247 00:22:14,889.1280918 --> 00:22:21,599.1280918 Somebody makes a mistake to say let's see how we can fix it instead of why did you make the mistake and, creating a blame culture. 248 00:22:21,909.1270918 --> 00:22:25,969.1280918 And it's a natural reaction for an edge because we're removing blame for ourselves. 249 00:22:26,399.1270918 --> 00:22:29,899.1270918 And we are essentially setting somebody else who's going to be blamed. 250 00:22:29,909.1280918 --> 00:22:32,39.1270918 It will see that as a cathartic effect. 251 00:22:32,354.1280918 --> 00:22:35,234.1280918 And the problem is solved because it's not us, it's them, and we fixed it. 252 00:22:35,924.1280918 --> 00:22:43,644.1280918 But if we say, how can we make sure this didn't happen? Or if something is complex, and you ask somebody for help, and you do things together. 253 00:22:44,4.1270918 --> 00:22:52,104.1275918 Or if you offer help, you say, I've got the spare time, can I help? I've got the spare capacity, can I help? You see somebody struggling, offer to help. 254 00:22:52,604.1275918 --> 00:22:59,949.1275918 Now, these are small acts of kindness that, in an unseen way, Move the needle to where we, it should be moved. 255 00:23:00,419.1275918 --> 00:23:03,449.1275918 Why? Because somebody feels that, they feel that the load is taken off them. 256 00:23:03,669.1275918 --> 00:23:05,369.1275918 They feel somebody actually cares. 257 00:23:05,629.1275918 --> 00:23:08,69.1275918 They feel they're not alone, struggling on their own. 258 00:23:08,499.1275918 --> 00:23:13,419.1265918 And everybody

struggles in some way, both internally and externally. 259 00:23:14,229.1265918 --> 00:23:15,989.1275918 So this is the next thing you can do. 260 00:23:16,819.1265918 --> 00:23:24,549.0275918 And then we get to other things where you get together and organize in small ways in your communities, in your workplace, in the organizations you want to work with. 261 00:23:24,999.1275918 --> 00:23:40,209.1275918 organized at or in, and you say what can we do to help? And these three things collectively, if we all do them, suddenly begin to move everything to the place that it should be moved at. 262 00:23:44,909.1265918 --> 00:23:51,189.1275918 You make it sound so simple, and I understand in a way it is. 263 00:23:51,869.1275918 --> 00:24:18,29.1275918 But, as humans, part of, our internal process, when we are fearful, when we get bad news, all of those things, that flood of hormones that take over inside, that fuel the rage and the despair and the angst it's hard sometimes to get a handle On the interior of you. 264 00:24:19,19.1275918 --> 00:24:25,579.1275918 And I think that in and of itself is also a big problem. 265 00:24:25,599.1265918 --> 00:24:35,239.1265918 And I know particularly airlines and airports and restaurants since COVID, okay. 266 00:24:36,19.1275918 --> 00:24:39,409.1275918 People have not seen the level and the. 267 00:24:40,384.1275918 --> 00:25:13,424.1280918 Multitude of bad behavior that just seems to explode everywhere and on the littlest provocation, it sometimes You know, that you see the news and wonder, what is it that's making everyone so angry? Partly, I think you're explaining it, being immersed in I'm going to call it bad energy. 268 00:25:13,854.1270918 --> 00:25:25,64.1280918 But everything from the sickness, from COVID to, not just the politics it's, the climate it's climate change, whether you believe it or not. 269 00:25:25,219.1280918 --> 00:25:37,729.1280918 Okay, the fires, and the tsunamis, and the earthquakes, and the blizzards, and the hurricanes that are happening all over, you have to take notice. 270 00:25:37,769.1280918 --> 00:25:39,459.1280918 They keep happening. 271 00:25:39,829.1280918 --> 00:25:54,79.1280918 And, I think it's, I think it's got to be terrifying for people who live, like in, in what is it, Tornado Alley, and the people in the Caribbean, and the people in the Philippines, and all around those areas. 272 00:25:58,94.1280918 --> 00:25:59,694.1280918 It's not a it's not a one off. 273 00:25:59,704.1280918 --> 00:26:09,144.1270918 Some of us here in Ottawa a number of years ago, we went through a series of tornadoes like we have never seen. 274 00:26:10,104.1270918 --> 00:26:19,24.1270918 It flattened an entire area and, it's not something that our climate we're fairly. 275 00:26:20,619.1270918 --> 00:26:24,259.1270918 It's not something we see with any regularity. 276 00:26:24,839.1270918 --> 00:26:38,159.1280918 But now that it's happened, you hear people here talking about the fact that when they see these things on the news now about tornadoes and earthquakes and what have you, there is that much deeper fear. 277 00:26:38,269.1270918 --> 00:26:44,139.1270918 It is hormonal as well, because you've experienced it now. 278 00:26:44,639.1270918 --> 00:26:56,739.2260918 And it's something that, It's one thing, I think, to see something happen on the other side of the world, like a tsunami or a massive earthquake that you have never experienced. 279 00:26:57,249.2270918 --> 00:27:06,869.2270918 When you experience something like that, the whole concept of the fear and what have you is heightened so much. 280 00:27:07,549.2270918 --> 00:27:24,314.2280918 What suggestions do you have for people to be able to respond to that? Maybe make a little sense of it and give themselves a couple of tools they can use to not be walking around in cortisol soup all the time. 281 00:27:26,114.2280918 --> 00:27:26,954.2280918 It would be very helpful. 282 00:27:29,184.2280918 --> 00:27:29,874.2270918 It would indeed. 283 00:27:29,944.2280918 --> 00:27:32,414.2280918 Okay, so let's let's explain a little bit. 284 00:27:33,624.2280918 --> 00:27:37,164.2280918 of the state we walk in when we experience what you just said. 285 00:27:38,374.2280918 --> 00:27:45,874.2270918 Now when we experience the fury of nature, we truly feel powerless because it is simply so vast. 286 00:27:45,934.2280918 --> 00:27:51,264.2280918 I think the last cyclone that hit the California thing was, and they're worried about it. 287 00:27:51,844.2280918 --> 00:27:56,974.2290918 Collectively it had the power of a thousand nuclear bombs. 288 00:27:57,474.2290918 --> 00:27:58,294.2290918 It's mind boggling. 289 00:27:58,324.2290918 --> 00:28:10,149.2290918 We say it to ourselves and we think, Sure, but how? And when you realize that nature actually has a kind of power, no matter what we can do, it just isn't enough. 290 00:28:10,149.2290918 --> 00:28:16,369.2290918 And somebody said, and one of my friends said, why don't we nuke it? Because that'll break it up. 291 00:28:17,499.2290918 --> 00:28:20,79.2290918 And I said collectively, it has a thousand nuclear bombs. 292 00:28:20,279.2290918 --> 00:28:23,269.2280918 So we need to use something more than that. 293 00:28:23,649.2290918 --> 00:29:12,874.2290918 Bigger than that if we use something bigger than that We pretty much devastate a massive amount of area in our planet including the planet and the the global climate So we haven't solved anything and he thought how can he have that kind of power? It's a massive natural phenomenon, it's a planetary phenomenon and the planet is, have us more All our planet is it's vast compared to what we experience and the power that it has is incredible So when we experience any kind of weather phenomenon, we feel fairly helpless and we feel helpless and we don't like that feeling We tend to do one of two things one is we deny things we say oh, it's not bad Or

it's going to be okay, even though we know it isn't or it's not what everybody says it is Gonna pass by or it's gonna go or it's one off. 294 00:29:13,784.2290918 --> 00:29:19,244.2290918 The other thing which we do is that we tend to feel angry. 295 00:29:20,684.2290918 --> 00:29:27,514.2290918 And why do we feel angry? Because the weather tends to make us feel like a victim in that situation in context. 296 00:29:27,869.2290918 --> 00:29:52,709.2290918 The anger response allows us to turn the victimhood which we feel, which essentially creates a toxic environment inside us, which affects in our internal organs, which is why we feel so bad when somebody victimizes us, somebody bullies us day after day, we're going to get ill and they can bully us verbally, no touching how we're going to get ill because cortisol levels rise in our system. 297 00:29:53,89.2290918 --> 00:29:59,24.2290918 Toxicity begins to increasing around our vital organs, and we begin to malfunction physically. 298 00:29:59,524.2290918 --> 00:30:00,914.2290918 And nobody has touched us. 299 00:30:01,94.2290918 --> 00:30:02,874.2290918 Nobody has said anything too aggressive. 300 00:30:02,874.2290918 --> 00:30:03,704.2280918 They just bullied us. 301 00:30:04,464.2290918 --> 00:30:05,694.2290918 They made us feel bad. 302 00:30:06,334.2290918 --> 00:30:10,334.2290918 So whenever we feel bad internally, our chemistry changes. 303 00:30:10,649.2290918 --> 00:30:12,559.2290918 in a way that's actually toxic for us. 304 00:30:14,299.2290918 --> 00:30:15,629.2290918 Whenever we feel good, it's the opposite. 305 00:30:15,919.2290918 --> 00:30:18,729.2290918 When we get angry, however, we reverse the toxicity. 306 00:30:19,449.2290918 --> 00:30:24,929.2280918 And that allows us to respond externally and minimize the pressure that we feel internally. 307 00:30:25,839.2290918 --> 00:30:35,654.2300918 This is why, for instance, if anybody has felt that, but, if let's say you hit your head against the cupboard and the cupboard door is open, The first response is to slap it. 308 00:30:36,484.2300918 --> 00:30:39,934.2300918 Yeah, or kick it, right? It's ridiculous. 309 00:30:39,934.2300918 --> 00:30:40,154.2300918 Yeah. 310 00:30:40,244.2300918 --> 00:30:49,444.2300918 What have we done? What have we done in that context? We essentially gave human agency to the inanimate object, and we said it hurt us and we're going to hurt it back. 311 00:30:49,444.2300918 --> 00:30:49,874.2300918 And that's it. 312 00:30:49,884.2300918 --> 00:30:51,864.2310918 It's great because now we have the upper hand again. 313 00:30:52,784.2290918 --> 00:31:03,274.2300918 All we have felt is sudden, unexpected pain through a stupidity of ours because we didn't map the external environment sufficiently to navigate it in a safe way. 314 00:31:05,54.2300918 --> 00:31:08,944.2300918 It's no different when we feel we're being victimized by a situation we can't control. 315 00:31:09,234.2300918 --> 00:31:20,834.2290918 In order to gain that sense of control which we need in order to function, we have that anger inside us which then needs to be externalized because anger that isn't externalized is also bad for us. 316 00:31:23,284.2310918 --> 00:31:26,214.2290918 That leads us to why you experience the things which you said you experience. 317 00:31:26,214.2290918 --> 00:31:35,694.2300918 Okay, you experience this kind of bad behavior, you experience people who are on edge, people who behave aggressively, people who are no longer inclined to be kind and accepting because they don't feel that way. 318 00:31:37,459.2300918 --> 00:31:42,469.2300918 How do we deal with it? This is where the smart part of us comes into effect. 319 00:31:44,189.2300918 --> 00:31:45,979.2300918 This is not the 10th century anymore. 320 00:31:46,89.2300918 --> 00:31:49,109.2300918 We understand where these emotions come from. 321 00:31:49,589.2290918 --> 00:31:51,659.2290918 We understand the triggers that bring them about. 322 00:31:51,939.2300918 --> 00:31:53,839.2290918 We understand how they make us feel. 323 00:31:54,569.2290918 --> 00:31:57,299.2290918 And now we know that, hey, we live in a civilized world. 324 00:31:57,989.2290918 --> 00:32:04,199.2290918 We need to be able to deal with it as adults, not children, and we need to be able to externalize those feelings. 325 00:32:04,899.2290918 --> 00:32:07,419.2290918 We can say, Hey, this thing makes me feel helpless and scared. 326 00:32:07,689.2290918 --> 00:32:12,699.2280918 The moment you articulate it, you have actually gained your agency back. 327 00:32:12,749.2290918 --> 00:32:14,889.2290918 You have gained a sense of control. 328 00:32:15,339.2290918 --> 00:32:19,469.2290918 If you share it with somebody and that other person says, I feel the same way. 329 00:32:20,709.2290918 --> 00:32:22,389.2290918 Ah, relief. 330 00:32:22,609.2280918 --> 00:32:23,309.2290918 You're not alone. 331 00:32:23,489.2280918 --> 00:32:26,189.2280918 You're not the only person feeling victimized by this. 332 00:32:26,699.2280918 --> 00:32:30,359.2280918 Being able to actually open up instead of keeping these things inside. 333 00:32:31,144.2280918 --> 00:32:38,474.2280918 makes it a lot less likely that we're going to explode because it gets bottled, bottled up to the point where we cannot control it any longer. 334 00:32:39,684.2280918 --> 00:32:43,644.2280918 So it's one strategy, but sometimes people can't open up. 335 00:32:43,834.2270918 --> 00:32:52,394.2290918 They're not able to connect with other people and you're absolutely alone, which isn't a bad situation to be in, but it happens. 336 00:32:52,394.2290918 --> 00:32:54,804.2290918 And we know that loneliness is an epidemic across the world. 337 00:32:55,224.2290918 --> 00:32:59,904.2290918 In that case, what can you do? Even in that we actually have tools At our disposal. 338 00:33:00,54.2290918 --> 00:33:06,734.2290918 Be sure and join us again next time when we dive into the tools. 339 00:33:07,364.2290918 --> 00:33:13,964.2290918 And other things we can do to stem this epidemic of loneliness. 340 00:33:14,364.3290918 --> 00:33:19,74.3290918 Thank you for being here for another inspiring episode of Suicide Zen Forgiveness. 341 00:33:19,104.3290918 --> 00:33:20,554.3290918 We appreciate you tuning in. 342 00:33:21,384.3290918 --> 00:33:27,564.3290918 Please subscribe and download on your favorite service and check out SZF's YouTube channel or Facebook community. 343 00:33:27,844.3280918 --> 00:33:32,114.3290918 If you have the chance to leave a five star rating or review, it'd be greatly appreciated. 344 00:33:33,44.3290918 --> 00:33:38,544.3290918 Please refer this to a friend you know who may benefit from the hope and inspiration from our guests. 345 00:33:39,164.3290918 --> 00:33:42,714.3290918 Suicide Zen Forgiveness was brought to you by the following sponsors. 346 00:33:43,314.3290918 --> 00:33:46,784.3290918 TROOL Social Media, the digital integration specialists. 347 00:33:47,294.3290918 --> 00:33:49,804.3290918 Let them get you rockin page one in the search results. 348 00:33:50,934.3290918 --> 00:33:57,474.3290918 Canada's keynote humorist, Judy Croon, motivational speaker, comedian, author, and stand up coach at Second City. 349 00:33:57,734.3290918 --> 00:34:02,384.3290918 Judy has been involved for over a decade in the City Street Outreach Program in Toronto. 350 00:34:02,624.3290918 --> 00:34:05,174.3290918 The ultimate podcasting pack. 351 00:34:06,264.3280918 --> 00:34:12,824.3290918 This is great for you if you're just starting your podcast or if you've been running it for a while. 352 00:34:13,454.3290918 --> 00:34:19,654.3290918 It's filled with tools, templates and trainings for starting growing and monetizing your podcast. 353 00:34:20,619.3290918 --> 00:34:27,369.3290918 Get access to time saving systems and strategies for accelerating your process at each step. 354 00:34:28,69.3290918 --> 00:34:34,269.3290918 Find new connections and collaborations in the uplifting podcasting community. 355 00:34:34,809.3290918 --> 00:34:36,339.3290918 I look forward to seeing you there. 356 00:34:38,159.3280918 --> 00:34:46,529.3290918 Do you have a story to share? 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