TRANSCRIPT 🔗
WEBVTT
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Ladies and gentlemen, what you're about to hear is sponsored
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by our friends at Secocia Electric. From generator installation to
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awesome roofline lighting for business or residential, see their work
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on their Facebook page or at Secocia, S-A-C-C-O-C-C-I-A, electric.com. What
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you're about to hear, ladies and gentlemen, is The most
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verbose recap of the NFL's scoreboard anywhere in the universe. Welcome,
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ladies and gentlemen, to Kelly Brown's Alliteration Scoreboard.
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The forlorn Falcons' Jamar Chase proves to be a pain
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in Spain, getting 155 yards of terrain and a 47-yard
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TD as the rustling, hustling, bustling Bengals beat down Atlanta
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34-17 in Madrid. The tenacious, tactful Texans toast ghost and
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roast the ragged haggard Chargers 44-22.
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Jim Harbaugh's men now 0-8.
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The Chiefs chuck buck and run amok on a Jets
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team that does indeed suck 35-12. The Seattle Seahawks skate
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by the careless, cowardly Cards 17-3. I guess it's supposed
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to be this way.
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The Cowboys corral the Colt, 27-23.
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The New York football Giants jab, jerk, jam, and jettison
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the Ailey Eagles in Philly, 19-11. The nasty, noisy Niners numb, nag, nail,
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and neutralize Vegas, 38-17. The rebounding, resilient, resourceful Rams win
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their third straight in their date in D.C., confining, confounding, compromising,
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and collaring the Commanders, 20-13. Say what you want about
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Bo Nix. He may not be the best, but Denver
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leads the AFC West at 7-2. Yesterday, Nix and his
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crew screw Carolina, Broncos 26, Panthers 21. Get out the
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popcorn and do not look at me with scorn.
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It's time for animal porn. The Lions lick the Dolphins 19-9.
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But I must say, where would they lick, I wonder?
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I guess it's somewhere down under. Down 23 to 22
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in overtime. The Browns go for two, but their attempt
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is muffed and rebuffed. Their chance for victory snuffed. Instead,
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the Saints get the win, but New Orleans doesn't cover
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the three, you see? So now they're dead to me.
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Saints 23, Browns 22. The potent Packers.
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Haste, base, debase, erase, lambaste, waste, and boat race. The puzzling,
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powerless patch, 45-27. And last night in Chicago, Tampa. Stage
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is a rally to tie, but Cairo Santos proves to
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be the guy.
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Nailing a 38-yard field goal as the Big Burly Bears
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bust and bet the Bucs 27-24. That is your Literature
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Scoreboard for Monday, November 9, 2026.
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Wow.