Full Transcript for Tips to Avoid Impulse Spending

that yeah, oh this might fit a need. It wasn't necessarily on my list, but might as well get it, or something inexpensive. I mean maybe not every trip, but even as an intentional shopper and a frugal person, sometimes throwing in a pack of gum I didn't plan on buying. Absolutely you love gum. Yeah. I would also argue with this stat we really said we weren't going to bash it before we highlighted the good things, but here we are. It says women may comprise, may comprise. I love that ambiguity and statistics up to of compulsive shoppers, and I believe that statistically women do make more purchases, do make more home purchases than men. That's data backed. But I do argue the fact that of compulsive shoppers are women because I know a lot of men just because they're buying different things, are still buying things that are unplanned. Well, the compulsive part isn't gender specific any right, be compulsive and impulsive. So alright, let's just move past that first section. Okay, we're I will point out this is a stat I do believe among compulsive shoppers, fifty eight percent have large debts. But that's a lot of people. Like, even if you're not a compulsive shopper, you can still have a large amount of student loan debt or maybe medical debt or something. Yeah, the common purchases. So I liked this section as well as the reasons for impulse purchasing. But the most common purchases that we will make when we're shopping compulsively is clothing, household items, shoes, jewelry, and items on sale. The Big Five, the Big Five, and all of these relative luxuries. Right, jewelry, shoes, household items, clothing. We're not talking food. We're not compulsively shopping for food sometimes though, I'm like throwing ice cream in my cart that I don't need. But these are the items that and I think it's helpful to know. Okay, these are the Big five or even dig deeper to say which one is the one you typically go to. For me, it's definitely clothing. So if I'm out and about and I'm not actually planning on going for clothing, I won't even go up and down those aisles. Already talking about how to avoid compulsive impulsive shopping. But and items on sale, definitely, you can always find me on the clearance section. But that's such a fallacy that you're actually saving money when you're buying clearance items. You might be buying discounted items, but you're still spending money. So if you didn't need those items, it's not a good deal and it often leads to compulsive purchases because oh man, I've never seen this price on this type of item before. I better just buy it, but I don't actually have a use for it. So beware shoppers absolutely. I mean we talked about this and back in our holiday Um and Pulse shopping episode, is that retailers will mark up things so that they can put them on sale, because a sale is a marketing technique. It's not to help you, it is marketing. Because again, items on sale is one of the big five, and that's I mean, definitely for me. I know

that I liked this credit card versus cash spending section, and so I am a die hard credit card user. I don't use cash because it's inconvenient for me, and I have practice frugality long enough to where I can use a credit card with confidence. I love the cash envelope method when you're first starting out and you really need to see what you're spending and how you're spending it. I love that. But it does say that twenty two dollars is the average cash transaction while a hundred and twelve is the average non cash transaction, which was super The difference there is is wide, and I can see why, Like, if I'm purchasing something very expensive, I'm obviously not going to pay in you know, cash bills. Like I'm buying a car on Craigslist, I might use a check. I don't know if that's what they mean by like non cash, but it definitely is big. So that's like important to note. If you're trying to reduce your impulse spending or reduce your spending in general, a cash diet could be a really great way to kick start that. Yeah, you're not going to be likely to spend more than two dollars on a transaction. Yeah, it's shocking also how few people actually pay off their credit cards each month. This statistics states cent so less than half of people will pay off their credit cards each month. I imagine within our frugal friends community that percentage would be much higher just because of our intentionality and looking at these things. But even for that reason, recognizing we may be less likely to pay off a credit card, so cash can really help us to tighten and rain this in and be more in tune with what we're purchasing, why we're purchasing. Yeah, do we want to be spending money on this thing. It's really common to have revolving credit card debt, even like if you're not struggling financially, Like I know so many people tell me. It's like, yeah, I have a couple of granding credit card debt, And I'm like, you have a you have like a six figure job, you have like all you have these things. Why can't you just pay off this credit card debt really quick in like a month or two and then and then keep it paid off. I guess it's one of those things. I guess I view them on the outside, it looks like they're doing well, but I don't know what's happening on the like inside. But it is one of those things where it's like credit card debt is notorious for being like the one thing that all financial professionals agree on, Like some people love debt and some people hate it, but everybody hates credit card debt, so one thing we can all agree on. So like, it's the first kind of debt that should be going. Credit card debt, the yeah fire, the unif it is really brings us all together. Well. This next section gets into some reasons for compulsive shopping, and I'm going to tread lightly carefully and gently here because it is getting more into some deeper emotional roots and does require some some soul searching, some looking at what is the why behind some of the compulsive shopping

tendencies that I may have, especially if this is a very common thing. And please be kind to yourself if you see that this is happening. We don't mention these things because just to leave ourselves there, but to assess, to highlight what's happening, and then to identify steps forward. We're not going to be able to change behaviors if we're also not looking at the thoughts and feelings that lead to those behaviors. So some of the things that this states and and all affirm that these can be present, they're not. Not all of them are true. Not all of them have to be present. And this is not an exhaustive list, but certainly feelings of loneliness or depression or feeling out of control could lead somebody to go to the store and want to cope. It can be a coping mechanism. The first bullet point that they put on here is a pretty intensive one and emotionally deprived childhood. They just kick it off with something pretty intense. Uh And and that can be true. It's not true every time. But where we are lacking something, where we're feeling a void, we will seek to fill that void, sometimes with beneficial things, sometimes with non beneficial things. Compulsive shopping can be one of those. An inability to tolerate negative feelings or not wanting to look at some of the negative feelings is the way that, you know, let me just go purchase something I like the high that I get from it. I want to feel good. This will make me feel good. Sometimes there can be comorbidity between compulsive shopping and using that as a coping mechanism, and hoarding. So when we talk about frugality and minimalism going hand in hand, certainly compulsive shopping and hoarding can go hand in hand. Um. Again, all of those are rooted in some some emotional and mental health concerns as well. A desire to seek excitement, a need for approval, lack of impulse control, a desire to have control. Any of these things can lead to making purchases that I did not intend to make. Don't just take our word for it. Do your own research on this, consider your own patterns and the ways that you cope, and not just removing this right, not just taking these tips and no longer compulsive shopping, but placing it with something still caring for yourself. These are some deep rooted things, and so definitely looking for ways to care for yourself in that place that is beneficial for you. Yeah, they definitely put in some deep ones on here, but it is good too when you are shopping to kind of take a look at, Okay, what is my mental state right now? I was looking on Instagram to see like where I saw this, but there was a post that was like try to like it was an acronym, but try to figure out like am I angry? Am I hungry? Am I like sad? Or try to take a checklist of essentially checklist of kind of your emotions in your mental state, like when you're shopping, and that can kind of help you point back to some of the reasons that might be for your compulsive shopping, because there's going to be yes, there's gonna be a feeling, and then there's going to you're gonna track that back to okay, like why am I feeling that? What is the this is the result of what in my life? And then if you keep doing that, eventually you'll notice a pattern and then you can get to the root cause. But we don't get there until we take a pause and try to figure it out. And so the first step isn't being perfect in and not shopping or not impulse shopping. The first step is to figure out, okay, why, So let's not fight our psychology. Let's try and work with it so that we can solve this problem. M Speaking of solving the problem, let's get into some tips on how to do this. Absolutely so this next article comes from develop Good Habits dot com what a place to be on the Internet. Yes, and they give us nine tips to curb this spending, to stop our impulse buying, interrupt that pattern. And the first one I love. It talks about having a not a thirty day any day, a dirty day, like a thirty day wait list. So if there is something that you want, be patient with it, start a list, write it down, and if you still want it thirty days from now, great, get it. Budget for it. But this just helps to slow us down and not purchase immediately something that we may not actually want. It's just feeding another need that we have. Finder dot Com has an extension called ice box, and I know it works for Chrome and Firefox, it might work for Safari, but it essentially replaces the buy now button at major sites with the put it on ice button, And so you put it on ice and then you decide the cool off time, um, thirty days, two weeks, whatever, and after that cool off time, the button will turn back into a buy now button. So obviously you can turn it off and there's ways around it, but it is just like a little barrier if you want to practice. Some patients, I think the only one that we really have trouble with is the grocery store, because obviously you have to eat. But I think with the rise of online grocery shopping that has really become easier. So we can stay out of the all de isisle of shame as nothing in that aisle is on my list, but I'll never right and it's here for a limited time. But just like, don't expect more, like, don't expect so much of yourself, Like not because you're not capable, but just because your brain has a finite amount of will power and once you exhaust it, you can't expect like anything else from That's like how I find myself after my kid goes to bed, like I've done so good all day and then I'm like, Travis, please leave and go get me some ice cream or tear Mossie from Publix was the latest one. But like just avoid it. I mean, just look at yourself like you're you know, it's like I can't do this, so I just I can't even touch it. I will say ordering groceries online has helped with food impulse purchasing, because I'm not passing all these other things up and down the aisle. I've got a very specific list. I just searched that list and put it in my card, So yes, that is a

great tip for that one. Number three on the list is to find free ways to reward yourself. So sometimes the compulsive impulsive shopping is a result of I deserve this, I had a really hard day, or I need to celebrate and let me just go out and spend money. And it's not about the actual thing, it's about the experience of it. But then by the end of the that you've spent money. So it's still important to reward ourselves to celebrate, but to find free ways of doing that. I know for me, just being outside is a reward, especially now that I live in Florida and the sun shines here constantly. Going to the beach as a reward, going near water as a reward, anything, right, brainstorm yourself what is life giving to you, and do those things before you seek to spend money as a celebration. Six is always have a list and plan for your purchases. This saves me a lot. I'm kind of flighty in the sense that I tend to get distracted easily. I'll do one thing and then I'll remember have to do another and then I'll go do that, and then I'll do some answers. I kind of have a hard time finishing things, even though like finishing is kind of like my fulfillment, So I have to have a list. If I have a list and I haven't things written down and a plan, then I feel like i've Then I can actually get things accomplished. And it's the same thing with impulsive spending. If you have a list, then you can stick to it, and you can feel once you've accomplished your list, you no longer need to put anything into your cart because you have accomplished the task at hand. You can feel proud of yourself. And I don't know if this works for everyone, but it definitely does for me. Once I've completed my list, I'm like, yes, let's get out of here. But planning and listing is so helpful when trying to control your spending. Yeah and yeah having a use for it ultimately. So it also keeps you from bringing things into your home that you don't actually have a plan for, don't need, won't use. I like number five on here too, which is to be mindful of your reaction to impulse spending, So keep in track of what has happened in the past when I've made an impulse purchase, what happened just before, what happened during, what happened after inside of me, my emotions, my thoughts, even some of my visceral reactions, and are those feelings worth the purchase. One of my good friends, shout out to, Sharon, has been keeping an emotional journal along with tracking her spending, and I think we talked about this in the interview with Leslie Tayne as well, kind of taking that tracking of spending to the next level where you mark down maybe even when you want to purchase something, what just happened in your circumstances, What are you feeling around that, What is it leading you to want to purchase? And even just slowing yourself down in that way can help interrupt the pattern. But it can also help us to identify where patterns exist, like, oh, when I'm feeling angry, that's when I typically go to shop for this thing online, or when I'm feeling really down or sad or my day didn't go well. And just beginning to be more aware of ourselves, more mindful of what's happening in our experiences can help us to identify again more beneficial ways to respond to those emotions. So I know that that's next level, but it can be really helpful. I just love that idea of pairing the finances and the emotional and mental health together because they do go hand in hand. We just often don't always want to look at those things. But track your spending and your emotions side by side. Try it out, let us know how it goes. I fully believe that it's about working with your psychology and not working against it. So instead of off all purchases and just restricting yourself to living under a rock, let's look at Okay, what are what are my quote unquote issues Like what are my raw you know, the things that keep me from succeeding? How can I either overcome them or work with them until they're overcome? And then also what are the things that light me up? And how can I indulge those in a freeway Like There's just there's so much to be said for finding out like what's underneath the surface and working with that, because that, in the end is sustainable. If you're trying to work against it, this lifestyle of frugal lifestyle will not be sustainable. Do you know what lights me up every week, every every week, the other of the week. That's right, it's time for the best minute of your entire week. Maybe a baby was born and his name is William. Maybe you paid off your mortgage. Maybe your car died and you're happy to not have to pay that bill anymore. That's bills upflow bills, Bill, Clint, this is the bill of the week. Okay, so my bill of the week is going to be pet supplies and like all their food, all the groomy everything, And that's because I really love my petsteering, so even though they can be pricing, it is well worth it. Yes, I love that. I mean I don't have any pets, but I know people love their pets. It sounds like you take such good care of your pet, and we love these bills where people are values based spending. It's not about constantly cheaping out in every category of life, but saving where we can to be able to spend where we want to. So that's so sweet. Thanks for calling in your bill about your pet supplies because you love your pets so much so you can buy all those cool toys and make all the cute videos that we see on social media. I want to see them from me, So in light of doing to those of the week, here is our next one. Hi, Jane and Jail. This is from me from Gainsville, Florida. My bill of the week is that earlier this month, I posted on the fruital Friends Facebook page about my laundry room drivewall in middles expensive repairs and comparing estimately coats between hiring a contractor versus a handy man. Well, thanks to the helpful replies to my post, I ended up hiring no one and doing the repairs myself. That alone take me about two thousand hundred

dollars, and I learned more about home repair. And because I had two thousand dollar budget to start with, from I checked my homeowners Insurance had given me for repairs, I was able to hire help to cover additional things on my improvement list such as floor installation, water here installation, window repair, and my air conditioning annual maintenance UM. So all of that UM I was still able to come on their budgets. Now my savings is about seven hundred and fifty dollars money that I'll pay back to my savings for unexpected expenses in the previous months, and that is my bill of the week. Thank you for all that you guys. To look forward to learning more from you guys every Friday. Goodbye. Oh my gosh, I love that and that is from the Frugal Friends community. Oh my god. How amazing to not be fearful of all these daunting repairs, but to figure out how to do it yourself. That definitely takes great and probably I'm solving and just a frugal mentality. So well done on all of these renovations that you did yourself, and then saving money, and then the money that you save you put back into your savings. So many amazing things happening here. Thanks for sharing that bill. Yes, if you want to submit your bill of the week, visit Frugal Friends podcast dot com slash bill. Leave us your bill. If it's about spending money on things that you love to spend money on, or saving money on things that you could just do yourself, let us know. We love to hear them all. And now it's time for round. So we are going to talk about our latest impulse buys because I am convinced a hundred percent of people make impulse purchases because a hundred percent of people are not perfect, and we will be the first admitted because Jen loves to emit our failures. I love it, vulnerabilities, I love it. So that's why I'm gonna go first. That's why I'm gonna go first. So at first, I was thinking I did impulse by a bag of veggie straws because they were on sale. That was my first thought. So that is a thing that I recently did. But it was like, I'm not gonna that's that's going to be like a slap in the face to Jels. So because you know how bad mine's. Mine was a trip to St. Augustine. We planned it kind of last minute and it was just kind of like a getaway because I missed traveling and it wasn't in the budget. We could have put it in the budget, I guess, but I really were. We were just like everybody's free that weekend, we can go booked without. I mean, we went with you on them Florida trip, and so I guess that kind of also makes it in both purchase for me too. Well. We did have money set aside for vacations that we did not, so that was our last impulse pend alright, Jen here's mine. Oh, Eric and I just bought a house. Those of you have been listening for a while, you know this. It's we are first time home buyers. Were fixing things up. We've been focusing on the outdoors mostly. You've probably heard that Eric is on Facebook market Place constantly and he often finds really great

deals, including that he wanted to at one point purchase an indoor water feature, which I immediately vetoed. It did lead to a little bit attention. Talked about that in a previous episode, so sometimes I have control. However, when it came to this one, he found a spiral staircase like that you could put outside and it all would spiral staircase outdoors beautiful on Facebook Marketplace used. I totally co signed for that one. Didn't plan on having a spiral staircase. Don't actually have a solid use for it except that it's stunning and I love spiral staircases. And we nearly have a flat roof, so we put it outside, put it up against our flat roof. We just go on the roof. People come over there, like where does that go? Or like the roof, like what's up there? Nothing? You could just get up on the roof, the roof, what's up there? The roof. You can kind of see good sunsets from there. But it's really just about spiral staircases. I love it, I mean really, I'm pleased for it. No looking back, but at one hundred percent was an impulse by. We do not need a spiral staircase. It does look stunning, but didn't plan for it at all. I bet you could see amazing sun rises from the roof, and no one's up that early. Well one day, no one in the right mind. I'll test it one day. Oh how about those impulse buys we made? I mean, hey, looking back on that, no regrets. No, I still look back fondly on that trip to St. Augustine that we took. That was very fun. And I mean impulse purchases are not bad. It's budgeting and having the margin to be able to make impulse purchases that align with your values. Yeah, they really are only not great for us when they're really interrupting our long term goals or we don't have the money for them. That spiral staircase, though, that has been a fan phase. You have used that very free quently, so internally judgmental when you bought that, I I'm glad. I don't know coming out yeah right, I was like what And usually it's Travis who's judgmental about people buying things, and I have to talk him down and being like, it's what they value and if it's not, it's not our place to judge. And I had to talk myself down and be like, it's not my place to judge of person putting a spiral staircase up to their roof. It's fine, but now it's one of the best features of the house, at least the backyard. Yeah no, it's okay. Your whole backyard is amazing, and the spiral staircase just fits. And I just had a place to go. It just it just had a place to go, did you. I'll ask that question later. All right, well, let's I mean, let's wrap this up. Okay, thank you all for listening. We hope you took something away from this, and it's not just that sometimes you never regret your impulse purchases. Hopefully there was more more takeaways than that. We love, love love reading your kind reviews. The kind ones are our favorites, and we especially loved this one that we want to share from Lindsay titled Informative and Fun. Jen and Jill are a couple of my favorite

humans, Lindsay, this podcast has provided immense value to my financial life. These ladies are inspiring and empowering. They rock at explaining different topics in a way that is understandable and fun. Thanks for being my favorite podcast, Lindsay, Lindsay, my favorite person, one of my favorite hum house. I'm offended. Well, it's something nice about me. Okay, stop judging my spiral star days. Deal deal. I deserved that. I deserved that, Thank you, Lindsay. I am so delighted to hear that today. And sometimes we do love uh to shake our heads at angry one star reviews, but we love and Brighton's our day to read your your kind reviews. So thank you, Lindsay. Thanks everyone for listening. If you enjoyed this show, please take a minute to leave a rating and review. It really truly helps other potential new listeners. Your fellow frugal friends know what our show is all about, know what it's not all about, so that they can find a good fit for them. And we have less one star reviews because of your five star reviews. Maybe a host who buys a spiral staircase for their backyard isn't the best fit for them, you know? Or somebody who just like picks Been, takes a nap in the middle of the day. That might be right, And we want people to know who we are because we're not for everyone, but maybe we are for those people. You know. If you've got a spiral staircase in the backyard and you're listening to this one, you start a nap, then come on let okay bye. Frugal Friends is produced by Eric Syrian Jen. Since we don't ever truly learn or get perfect, do you have a even we learn? Since we don't ever truly like get perfect? I see where I saw where you were going? Um? Do you have a more recent impulse purchase example? Just to keep it fresh and relevant? Um, I have been doing so much shopping on Amazon recently for Christmas and the rental and like, I don't know, I haven't started. I have not started shopping like doing baby shopping stuff. Um, but it's just a matter of time. I guess I can tell you about an impulse by I'm thinking about making. It's not a get on it. I'm sorry. Okay, Oh, my gosh, maybe you are perfect. Hold up, hold up, hold up, all right, let me just look, let me just look. Um. Oh yes, okay, here we go Black Friday because honestly, we're not recording. I mean, we're not too far away from Black Friday when we're warning this, so this makes sense. So Travis and I went to Best Buy to get to t VS for the rental, and while we were we were there with our friends Dave and Whitney, who are big fans of Black Friday. Like I did not realize this. You always learned something new about your friends, and it's always like so delightful to just learn their quirks. And we're at best Buy with them and they are getting this blink video doorbell and like cameras for outside, and they have planned for this, they have been looking for this. And I saw it and I was like, oh, my gosh, we don't have a doorbell, Like, we just don't have a doorbell. This house is a million years old. There are no outside lights, there's no dead bolt, there's no doorbell, like, come break into my house. And like, we really enjoyed our ring doorbell at our old house. So I thought about it for a few hours and later that day I did by the doorbell. I thought about it for a few hours though, yeah it yeah, it wasn't it wasn't completely planned. There was a little bit of peer pressure there. That's a good example. Yes, I also bought a cappuccino from Phrase today in my effort to that Phrase down. No, they're not going down. I just I see so many things in St. Pete, so many like classic St. Pete places just getting pushed out by landlords, like doubling the rent and these bougie coffee and restaurants coming in, and I don't want that to happen to Phrase because I love Phrase, and so I'm on a mission to save Phrase single handedly. It's proactive and preventative, like Phrase is not giving no indication that they're struggling. No, absolutely not. There's always a line it's so good. But I will buy once a week my my small cappuccino and my sausage roll, and that'll be my justice for all like takeout and restaurant dining is that I just gotta keep them from going out of business. That everybody's nobody's reason living every day as if every restaurant in store that was about to go the real, the real real are committed in Okay, We're three years out and I'm still committed to saving phrase. Okay, how about you, jel oh gosh, u you are you committed? Committed? I don't know. I think my most recent impulse purchase was on some Christmas lights. Uh and again at time of recording, that's relevant, it's not. It's not been that far away. I saved you from buying Christmas lights. Yeah, oh my gosh. I totally forgot our trip to Sam's Club. Jen literally made this plant. I asked her what what does she hope and planned to buy at Sam's Club? And she literally said, I am going to let Sam's Club tell me what to buy. It was very ti frugal friends, but I did support her like I was the rider guy in that situation, and we really egged each other on. We really did go all out. Okay, in context, what I meant by that was, I'm going to compare prices to buying at Walmart and if the price is better for the generic brand, because I'm not going to just buy name brand because it's bulk and it's available. I'm gonna, you know, a member's market. It if it's good, then I'm going to buy it. And I'm not just gonna buy it because it's bulk. I'm gonna buy it because, like you know, I do. I will use twelve cans of dice tomatoes. You did some great research and that and it helped all of us. I did. Yeah, but then I also bought some wood for reserve bourbon cherries, so that happened. Yep. Yeah. Not perfect. None of us are, no, and sometimes we encourage one another's in perfection. And that's what makes for just a good friend. And that's why you never see us on Instagram, because that's what we are doing in real life. I will post that to Instagram. I did take photos. I was like, oh, is this good content? And then I got super Oh my gosh. Oh no, I didn't take video. I just took pictures posted to a story. It'll be a story, too into. I was too into the canned tomatoes to know. I think I have a picture of you in the canned tomatoes section. Oh yeah, it's gonna go in a story. Here we go. I'm doing it. I can't wait. Okay, bye,