TRANSCRIPT 🔗
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What is up, Daddy Gang? It is your single father,
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Alex Cooper, with Call Her Daddy.
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Not every day you meet an Irish legend.
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I know what you mean, Coo Collin.
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Leaping vast distances, holding off armies.
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Eating tonnes of fresh grass.
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What?
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Not you, we're cows.
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That's one of the reasons Irish milk is so good.
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It's famous all over the world.
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Legendary.
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Ireland's grass and our farmers' commitment to more sustainable actions
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help make Irish dairy a true Irish legend.
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Always look for the National Dairy Council guarantee. Learn more at.
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Ndc.ie Due to the leaves falling in autumn and the
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challenges this brings, Eireann Road Airan wishes to advise customers
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that a revised timetable will take effect on Dart and
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Dublin commuter routes from Monday, September 21st until December 12th.
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Morning and evening peak services will be affected with some
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earlier departure times. Please check travel times on the Eireann
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Road Airan app or irishrail.ie. Eireann Road Airan is part
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of the Transport for Ireland network.
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That's the thing about doors. Open one and whole new
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worlds suddenly become possible. If you're searching for your new
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Start searching and find your happy place at myhome.ie.
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We're back, bitches. What the fuck is up, Daddy Gang?
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It is your founding.
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Father back on another one.
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For another episode of Call Her Daddy. Let's kick this
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week off with a little thing I like to call
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fact of the day. Personal anecdote of the day. Daddy Gang,
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I have not had sex in almost a month. Alex,
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did you and your boyfriend break up? No, actually that's
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what makes it even sadder. I still have a boyfriend
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and I haven't had sex in almost a month and
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he is such a fucking asshole. The fact that he
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won't fuck me, I'm just kidding. It has literally nothing
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to do with him. And that again adds to the
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fucking sad part of the story. I have been stressed
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about work and I will explain all of those things
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in the next two weeks. But I've been stressed with
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work and it's so sad because my boyfriend wants to
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fuck me and I want him to fuck me. That's
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the sad thing. It's like, so why aren't you? Some
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would say, get the dick, big Al. Big Al, a
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big dick in the vagina will fix you right up, sweetheart.
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But you know what? And I hope people can relate
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to this. Sometimes there's two situations. You are stressed and
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you say, I need to have an orgasm. I need
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that release. Or you're on the other spectrum, which I
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have been for the past few weeks. And it's like,
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I don't want to fuck. And I know that's shocking
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because it's called her daddy. But like, I'm not in
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the mood to fucking have sex. And I feel bad. Honestly,
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my boyfriend the past few weeks has been like... I'm
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ready to not feel like the Uber Eats man. I'm
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ready to not be the delivery guy in the morning
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with your coffee. Like I'd like to get my dick wet.
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And I look at him and I say, shut the
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fuck up. Can you guys tell I'm like PMSing? The
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thing is, is I know that this is going to
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turn around soon. One, because in the next few weeks,
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I'll have clarity on work shit. But two, bitches, it's
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about to be summer. And this isn't just any old
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motherfucking summer. This summer is going to be so fucking psychotic.
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So fucking out of control. I feel like everyone is
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so suppressed. Everyone is so ready. To fucking get naked,
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drink alcohol, and fuck. And I know there's going to
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be people that are like, Alex, that's not
Load full transcript
right. Well,
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that's just, I'm just saying the fucking truth. You know
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all of your fucking friends are ready to booty bump
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the fuck out of this summer. I'm pretty sure someone
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told me that condom sales are up.
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Okay?
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I didn't say it. The condom sales said it.
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Okay?
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Fuck you too.
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Daddy!
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Motherfucking gang. Welcome back to another week of Call Her
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Motherfucking Daddy, baby. We have a guest this week who
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has now become a fast friend. I've never had someone
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on the show so far that's come in and talked
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about so openly their dynamic with their parents and how
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it's affected not only their romantic life, but their life
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in general. And also, I think it's a pretty cool
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scenario when you have someone come on that I admit
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I had my preconceived notions and I thought certain things
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and I didn't know half of the story. And so
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I don't know. I think it's cool today in our
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social media age, like we stalk people or you follow
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someone on Instagram that you think you know their life.
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And then I would go as far to say from
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these interviews that I'm learning most of the time, what
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you see on social media, it's not only not accurate,
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but sometimes it's almost the complete opposite scenario. So Let's
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have fucking fun this week. Everybody relax. Everybody go take
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a fucking shit and then come back and be in
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a good fucking mood because this week it is fun.
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It's girl talk.
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We're chilling.
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Go grab a bottle of wine. Get yourself some tequila, vodka,
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shot glasses, whatever you're in the goddamn mood for. A
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nice blackout or a nice buzz. I don't judge here.
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Let's have a good time. Introducing Josie Canseco. I'm going
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to be honest. I never thought that I would have
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you on the podcast. One, because we didn't know each other, really.
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I feel like I've seen you on Instagram. I'm sure
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you've seen me on Instagram. Or you're going to be like, nope,
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I've never seen you.
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In my life. No, we have. Obviously, we crossed paths
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a couple times, seen each other. I definitely knew who
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you were when you reached out. I was like, fuck yeah,
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super down.
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So random, though. And so I think I was thinking
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about it. And I'm like, just to get right into it,
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Daddy Gang, the first real connection we had on the
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internet was that your dad DM'd me.
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Oh, my God. I completely forgot that that happened. And
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I remember, did you tweet me about it? No. I
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think someone else was like, they were just like, yeah,
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get your dad. So my dad does this. Yeah. It's
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a thing he does. And I'm like, please do not
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do that to friends, people I know, younger girls.
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Well, and I wanted to first almost actually, this is
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going to probably throw you up. I actually wanted to
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apologize to you because I feel like I've had time
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to think about it and i feel like in the
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moment i knew he was beefing with barstool like i
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work with barstool so i when i saw that i
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my initial reaction was to post it because i'm like
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oh there's creepy dudes in my dms like what the fuck.
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Yeah and he was yelling at like barstool and all
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these people about the fights and stuff like he kind
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of brought it upon himself.
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Right right so then i think in that moment my
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initial reaction was like oh like protect barstool and like,
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like post it. But as I've now not, I haven't
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really gotten to know you yet, but like now knowing
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who you are also, I wanted to say, I'm sorry,
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because I can't imagine being in your position, and then, like, having, like,
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we're the similar age, and then having to see that, like,
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that fucking sucks. So now I'm, I wish I could
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take that back, so I'm sorry.
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You're so sweet! I love that you actually, like, afterwards, you, like,
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obviously thought about it in depth, and you're like, wow, like, maybe, like,
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I don't know how she felt about it, could have
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hurt her. Yeah. It makes you feel any better. It's okay.
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It did it. I honestly, like, my dad does whatever
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he wants to do whenever he wants to do it.
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He's a public figure. He tweets and does his shit,
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and I don't really have a say in it, so
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at this point, I've just kind of been, like, I
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take it as it comes. Like, it is what it is,
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and I don't really get affected by it. But also, like,
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this has been a thing that he's, like... He doesn't
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really know who's my friend exactly and who isn't because
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he's not, like, that well-versed with, like, social media and Instagram.
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But he DMs. He's, like, DMed a lot of my
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friends and sent that exact same thing. Come to Vegas.
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Here's my number, blah, blah, blah. And I'm just like, Father,
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that is my friend. Like, he's just not around. Like,
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he's not super close, so he doesn't know the people
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I hang out with all the time. But this is, like,
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a thing that a lot of my friends have been like, Yo,
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your dad DMing. I'm like... I'm so sorry.
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And it puts you in such a hard position because
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you're like, dad, what the fuck?
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It's my father. He's like 55, 56 now. I'm just like, dad,
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these are my girls are like 20, 21. I....
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Well, I think I was thinking about it because I'm like,
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people may be like, wait, what the fuck? What's going on? Like,
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if they don't know you, if they don't know your dad,
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I think it's good for us to kind of just
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like go all the way back to the beginning and
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kind of just start with like where you're from, who
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you are. And obviously like your dad is a part
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of your life and like why at first you were like,
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quote unquote known. And obviously now you're so much more
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than just Jose Canseco's daughter, way more than that.
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But yeah.
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I have talked so much on this podcast about dating
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professional athletes, Josie. And it has been like, I've seen,
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but I.
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Actually saw, cause I've obviously did my, did my homework,
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did some tape, watch my tapes. Um, you have nicknames
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for them, which I'm obsessed with. I was like, if
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we refer to anyone, like we can give them like little.
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Nicknames for you today. Cause Josie doesn't want to talk
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like straight names, which I totally respect. We're just talking
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about Josie. We're talking about Josie today. But, um, so I've,
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I've talked about dating professional athletes and I was sitting
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here and I'm like, wow, like this is going to
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be such an interesting interview because I'm sitting with someone
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right now that is not isn't dating professional athletes, but
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is the daughter of one.
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And I've seen his dating life and how athletes perceive girlfriends, relationships,
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and yes, doesn't seem great. Right.
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It's not, it's not.
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Okay.
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So can you kind of explain like growing up as the,
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in that position, like walk us through what that was like?
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So my parents split very young. They met at a Hooters.
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It was my mom's first day working at Hooters and
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she like just got a little boob job and she
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was so excited. And the first day I worked, she
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met my dad, pretty much fell in love instantly. And
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he like took her up out of Cleveland, Ohio. But yeah,
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they met and they were together, fell in love, got pregnant,
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got married. And then they were only together for a
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couple of years because I think there was a certain
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level of like, toxicity and unfaithfulness between both of them.
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I think my dad kind of initiated... I mean, he
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was an athlete. He was in the road. Like, back
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in the day, that
era of baseball and, like, his
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level of success was, like, massive. It was, like, really
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put baseball on the map as a sport. And, yeah,
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and they just, like, kind of split. And then I
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was raised in L.A. with my mom. Okay. Single mom
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just kind of raised me her whole life, me and her. That's, like,
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my rock. My mom was, like, my best friend on
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the planet. She's, like, the best person ever. And my
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dad just kind of always, like.
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So he retired or not retired. He got kind of
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like blackballed because I don't, for anyone who doesn't know,
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took steroids and like got kicked out of baseball and
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then wrote a book and kind of like snitched on people,
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but it was actually like the truth. And so my
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whole childhood with him, he was just kind of always,
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since he stopped playing baseball, like kind of abruptly, he
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just always kind of had to chase the next opportunity
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for money and success because he went from being the
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highest paid athlete in the world to having nothing. Like
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I've seen my dad at a point of having like,
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you know, $ 20 to his name and not knowing like,
239
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his next meal and stuff, and, like, he's really been
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through a journey.
241
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That's already interesting, too, because I feel like, naturally, just
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to be honest, I think anyone would perceive you as being.
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Not like I feel like people look you and probably
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like oh she has it so easy like that.
245
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Everyone thinks I'm rich everyone thinks I'm just like rich
246
00:11:36.899 --> 00:11:38.679
and Canseco's daughter you have so much money this and
247
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that I'm like little do they know like that is
248
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so not the case so.
249
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At all you're raised by your mother what was your
250
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relationship then with like your dad like was he in
251
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your life.
252
00:11:49.090 --> 00:11:51.690
So he tried to be here and there like he
253
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lived in LA for I'd say maybe like four or
254
00:11:54.950 --> 00:11:58.409
five years total throughout my entire life to
date. Ever
255
00:11:58.450 --> 00:12:01.929
since then, he's lived elsewhere. He's been playing softball, like,
256
00:12:01.950 --> 00:12:04.409
playing baseball, like, Little League, kind of, like, whatever he
257
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can get his hands on to play and make money,
258
00:12:06.230 --> 00:12:07.789
he would do that. And a lot of the time,
259
00:12:07.809 --> 00:12:10.549
that meant not being around me, unfortunately. But, you know
260
00:12:10.580 --> 00:12:11.960
what I mean? He had to make money. He had
261
00:12:11.980 --> 00:12:13.639
to do something. So I kind of, you know, I
262
00:12:13.639 --> 00:12:16.000
have to give him a little bit of respect for, like, hustling.
263
00:12:16.019 --> 00:12:16.440
Totally.
264
00:12:16.460 --> 00:12:18.279
But he wasn't around, really, ever.
265
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So basically... for everyone listening, I'm gonna, you can explain now, like,
266
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your most vivid memory of your father is probably when
267
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this book came out.
268
00:12:27.870 --> 00:12:29.409
Yeah, it was just, like, the time where he was
269
00:12:29.429 --> 00:12:32.350
probably the most, uh, controversial. He had, this was, like,
270
00:12:32.549 --> 00:12:35.210
the year after, uh, playing, so he still had money,
271
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he was out in LA, he was getting into acting,
272
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he was always, like, the Playboy Mansion, writing his book,
273
00:12:39.460 --> 00:12:42.600
and he was, like, very controversial, but, like, still successful,
274
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and so as soon as he wrote the book and
275
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the book came out, I got a lot of, um,
276
00:12:48.330 --> 00:12:50.570
heat for it i guess it's his daughter and like
277
00:12:50.629 --> 00:12:53.809
heard a lot of weird terms and like very derogatory like.
278
00:12:53.970 --> 00:12:57.070
Well let's first explain yeah the book was basically and
279
00:12:57.110 --> 00:12:59.710
correct me if i'm wrong but he essentially came out
280
00:12:59.909 --> 00:13:03.610
and exploited the mlb for saying like a bunch of
281
00:13:03.649 --> 00:13:05.789
these guys are on steroids yeah and at first he
282
00:13:05.830 --> 00:13:08.090
got blackballed because everyone was like what are you talking
283
00:13:08.110 --> 00:13:10.250
about that's not true that's not true meanwhile ends up
284
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coming out that he was.
285
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Slowly but surely this is true this is true a
286
00:13:13.549 --> 00:13:15.320
raw everything you know what i mean like bring up
287
00:13:15.360 --> 00:13:17.620
names but all yeah it was all ended up being true.
288
00:13:17.500 --> 00:13:19.419
So at first it was like oh you're a fucking
289
00:13:19.539 --> 00:13:22.200
snitch because you're coming out and but what you're revealing
290
00:13:22.240 --> 00:13:24.299
the truth and the
dark side of what at that
291
00:13:24.340 --> 00:13:26.059
time the mlb was and the.
292
00:13:26.039 --> 00:13:28.159
Guys were testifying in court being like i have not
293
00:13:28.259 --> 00:13:30.080
i never have this and that like mark mcguire these
294
00:13:30.100 --> 00:13:31.590
people were just like i swear to god i've never
295
00:13:31.610 --> 00:13:33.990
done it and it's like but you are and then
296
00:13:34.049 --> 00:13:36.149
my dad was so bitter because he was the only
297
00:13:36.289 --> 00:13:39.629
one who my dad was obviously like not to like Yeah,
298
00:13:39.649 --> 00:13:41.690
go for it. Blow smoke up his ass. But he
299
00:13:41.730 --> 00:13:44.519
was like incredible at what he did. He was very talented. And,
300
00:13:44.559 --> 00:13:48.259
you know, I know the steroid era was like controversial
301
00:13:48.279 --> 00:13:50.750
in the sense of like, did they really work that hard? Like,
302
00:13:50.889 --> 00:13:53.590
was it just steroids or whatever? But he was great
303
00:13:53.649 --> 00:13:57.120
and he lost, just like that, his passion. And it
304
00:13:57.159 --> 00:13:59.240
was unfair that all these other players kept making money
305
00:13:59.279 --> 00:14:02.159
and kept getting to play. And he didn't when they
306
00:14:02.200 --> 00:14:03.299
were all doing the same thing.
307
00:14:03.580 --> 00:14:05.340
When did he, like, why did he stop playing? Why
308
00:14:05.360 --> 00:14:06.100
did he retire?
309
00:14:06.639 --> 00:14:09.029
So he got blackballed in the sense that, like, no
310
00:14:09.129 --> 00:14:13.090
one offered him a deal. Like, everyone just kind of
311
00:14:13.129 --> 00:14:15.509
congregated and talked about the idea of, like, do we
312
00:14:15.529 --> 00:14:17.129
want to play with Jose? Do we want Jose to
313
00:14:17.149 --> 00:14:18.580
go on any of our teams? He went from being
314
00:14:18.620 --> 00:14:20.600
like highly paid and like entertaining and one of the
315
00:14:20.620 --> 00:14:23.000
best players, not a single offer. No one would speak
316
00:14:23.019 --> 00:14:24.600
to him. No one would talk to him. Mark McGuire,
317
00:14:24.620 --> 00:14:26.519
his like bash brother boy, like cut him off. Like
318
00:14:26.620 --> 00:14:31.220
everyone completely like blacklisted him from the MLB as a whole.
319
00:14:31.240 --> 00:14:34.840
And I think it was obviously the organization that was like, no,
320
00:14:35.139 --> 00:14:35.860
we're done with this.
321
00:14:36.159 --> 00:14:40.279
Josie, can you walk me through your life when that
322
00:14:40.399 --> 00:14:43.179
book comes out? Was there bullying, et cetera? Yeah.
323
00:14:43.210 --> 00:14:47.169
Uh, I just, like, always, so obviously being Josie Canseco
324
00:14:47.220 --> 00:14:48.860
and having the name tied to me, like, I just
325
00:14:49.000 --> 00:14:53.019
always heard about my dad, but he was never really around. Like,
326
00:14:53.059 --> 00:14:54.559
he tried to be, and he tried to be there.
327
00:14:54.600 --> 00:14:55.940
He tried to be there for me, and, like, this
328
00:14:56.000 --> 00:14:58.059
is when he was in LA, and he was, you know, local.
329
00:14:58.100 --> 00:14:59.460
He lived in the Valley, I think, in, like, Encino
330
00:14:59.500 --> 00:15:01.539
or something, and I'd see him here and there, but, like,
331
00:15:02.480 --> 00:15:05.419
success and fame and money was always before me, and
332
00:15:05.820 --> 00:15:08.620
so therefore, like, Like, I was, like, for example, like,
333
00:15:08.850 --> 00:15:10.629
I was, like, so I cheerleaded for a while, like,
334
00:15:10.649 --> 00:15:13.269
competitive cheering, and he would, like, not show up to
335
00:15:13.309 --> 00:15:16.210
my competitions, and everyone was like, oh, Conseco's daughter, Conseco's daughter,
336
00:15:16.230 --> 00:15:18.149
and I'd be like, I don't even know.
337
00:15:18.230 --> 00:15:19.529
Yeah, yeah.
338
00:15:19.929 --> 00:15:21.500
And I know he tried his best, but, like, he
339
00:15:21.519 --> 00:15:23.460
just had a lot on his plate, and maybe, you know,
340
00:15:23.700 --> 00:15:26.580
I think sometimes people have kids when they're not ready or,
341
00:15:26.679 --> 00:15:28.899
you know, appropriate timing, so maybe that's part of it. Yeah.
342
00:15:29.409 --> 00:15:33.049
Do you remember anyone, like, specifically saying anything to you
343
00:15:33.330 --> 00:15:35.889
about when those, like, what would people say to you?
344
00:15:36.029 --> 00:15:38.340
They would just be like, I mean, anything that they
345
00:15:38.379 --> 00:15:42.220
could shoot at me for, like, your dad's a fucking snitch, blah, blah,
346
00:15:42.259 --> 00:15:45.220
fuck you and your family. At the time, my mom
347
00:15:45.259 --> 00:15:47.559
had also, like, maybe, like, a year after had done Playboy.
348
00:15:48.159 --> 00:15:50.759
Which was, like, back in its prime. Like, did the cover,
349
00:15:50.899 --> 00:15:54.860
full nude. Like, hot as fuck. But for so many reasons...
350
00:15:54.700 --> 00:15:55.639
I know, I'm like, go mom.
351
00:15:55.659 --> 00:15:56.500
Go mom.
352
00:15:56.639 --> 00:15:58.080
But for so many reasons, people were like, yeah, you're
353
00:15:58.100 --> 00:16:01.279
fucking family. Fuck this. Fuck you. Like, your dad's a snitch. Like,
354
00:16:01.299 --> 00:16:04.320
your dad's, like, worthless. And I'd, like, be out in
355
00:16:04.379 --> 00:16:07.120
public with my dad and people would, like, yell at him. Like,
356
00:16:07.139 --> 00:16:09.340
people had the audacity. When we'd be, like, walking in, like,
357
00:16:09.360 --> 00:16:11.460
a movie theater or whatever. I specifically remember a time
358
00:16:11.480 --> 00:16:13.240
we were walking into a movie theater, like, him and
359
00:16:13.279 --> 00:16:15.429
I together because we'd had, like, daddy-daughter dates or whatever. And...
360
00:16:17.519 --> 00:16:20.000
walking out and someone's like you fucking snitch and I'm
361
00:16:20.039
--> 00:16:22.190
like I literally just like at this time my dad
362
00:16:22.230 --> 00:16:23.990
wouldn't really educate me on much because I was so
363
00:16:24.029 --> 00:16:26.870
young but I knew like something was bad and I
364
00:16:26.909 --> 00:16:28.850
knew something wasn't wrong but I just like didn't know
365
00:16:28.889 --> 00:16:31.309
what so I was like why do these people hate
366
00:16:31.330 --> 00:16:33.169
my dad why is my dad like one of the
367
00:16:33.220 --> 00:16:37.720
most sought after spoken about kind of people right now
368
00:16:37.779 --> 00:16:39.679
but I just I was just young I didn't get
369
00:16:39.700 --> 00:16:41.139
it and I didn't get why I was getting hate
370
00:16:41.159 --> 00:16:42.039
for it either and then.
371
00:16:42.649 --> 00:16:45.139
Josie that is like the like I'm trying to put
372
00:16:45.200 --> 00:16:47.299
myself in that situation because I feel like at a
373
00:16:47.399 --> 00:16:51.360
young age that's not a normal situation to have as
374
00:16:51.399 --> 00:16:53.659
a child that like you're walking into a movie theater
375
00:16:53.700 --> 00:16:56.360
and people are screaming at your dad yeah like I
376
00:16:56.379 --> 00:16:59.899
I can't even imagine what mentally that did to you
377
00:17:00.000 --> 00:17:03.269
and like psychologically because you were an only child right.
378
00:17:03.070 --> 00:17:06.589
Yeah only child no no siblings Just my Josie.
379
00:17:06.750 --> 00:17:09.130
OK, so like I was like just dealing with some
380
00:17:09.279 --> 00:17:11.740
family shit. The other we have been dealing with it
381
00:17:11.799 --> 00:17:13.599
and I have not publicly talking about right now. But
382
00:17:13.640 --> 00:17:15.839
like I was thinking, too, I was saying to my brother,
383
00:17:15.900 --> 00:17:17.539
I was like, I have no fucking idea what I
384
00:17:17.559 --> 00:17:19.920
would do if I didn't have my siblings. Because I
385
00:17:19.960 --> 00:17:22.299
look back at really hard times in my childhood when
386
00:17:22.319 --> 00:17:24.920
like my dad works for the NHL. And when I
387
00:17:24.960 --> 00:17:26.980
was younger, the NHL went on a big strike. And
388
00:17:27.000 --> 00:17:29.349
so my dad lost his job. And I remember, like,
389
00:17:29.450 --> 00:17:32.849
all my friends growing up were really wealthy. And when
390
00:17:32.890 --> 00:17:34.690
my dad lost his job, like, I couldn't go to
391
00:17:34.730 --> 00:17:35.950
my parents and be like, hey, can I have that
392
00:17:36.000 --> 00:17:38.539
extra $ 20 to go to the mall? And, like, there
393
00:17:38.619 --> 00:17:40.660
was a really hard time in my life where I was, like,
394
00:17:41.000 --> 00:17:43.660
watching my parents struggle, but I would turn to my
395
00:17:43.740 --> 00:17:45.690
siblings and, like, talk about it with them.
396
00:17:45.710 --> 00:17:49.900
Because that's all you have, technically, is, like, family is, like. Unconditional.
397
00:17:50.059 --> 00:17:51.940
And it's trusting and loving.
398
00:17:51.980 --> 00:17:54.400
But I'm like, but you didn't have siblings. So, like,
399
00:17:54.480 --> 00:17:56.380
who the fuck did you go to in those moments
400
00:17:56.420 --> 00:17:59.849
where you're, like, in California, your dad's nowhere to be found, and, like,
401
00:17:59.869 --> 00:18:01.609
your mom is your mom, but it's your mom. Like,
402
00:18:01.829 --> 00:18:04.029
you didn't have siblings. Like, who did you go to
403
00:18:04.269 --> 00:18:05.210
in dark times?
404
00:18:06.109 --> 00:18:06.180
Um.
405
00:18:10.210 --> 00:18:10.910
You don't know one.
406
00:18:11.049 --> 00:18:13.809
No, not really. I just kind of like I think
407
00:18:13.849 --> 00:18:15.930
that kind of translates into why I have this like
408
00:18:16.009 --> 00:18:17.789
tough shell where I just like kind of don't give
409
00:18:17.829 --> 00:18:19.670
a fuck. And I know when to like shut off
410
00:18:19.690 --> 00:18:23.329
and detach and shit because like I didn't really have
411
00:18:23.390 --> 00:18:25.789
anyone to go to and resort to. And like my
412
00:18:25.849 --> 00:18:28.009
mom's upbringing with me is also a different story. She
413
00:18:28.049 --> 00:18:31.150
was around, but she was also kind of like my dad. OK,
414
00:18:31.190 --> 00:18:32.609
so I'm going to kind of put him on blast.
415
00:18:32.650 --> 00:18:33.130
I feel bad.
416
00:18:33.690 --> 00:18:35.710
He just he never took care of us, never paid
417
00:18:35.730 --> 00:18:38.390
child support, never nothing. My mom had no job, no
418
00:18:38.410 --> 00:18:41.799
nothing and had to. Raised me single mom with, like, nothing.
419
00:18:42.720 --> 00:18:45.900
So she was kind of, you know, she was hustling, too.
420
00:18:45.980 --> 00:18:48.130
She had to. She had to work. She did Playboy.
421
00:18:48.190 --> 00:18:49.690
She ended up doing a reality show that was, like,
422
00:18:49.730 --> 00:18:52.910
successful as well. And she hustled, but that means that
423
00:18:52.970 --> 00:18:54.410
she had to be absent as well a lot of
424
00:18:54.430 --> 00:18:54.809
the time.
425
00:18:54.829 --> 00:18:56.009
So it's like you're just, like, alone.
426
00:18:56.029 --> 00:18:57.309
So just, yeah.
427
00:18:57.690 --> 00:18:58.990
Just little Josie.
428
00:18:59.089 --> 00:19:00.990
Just me. Now I, like, I love it. I appreciate
429
00:19:01.009 --> 00:19:03.559
it because that's obviously probably what I'm used to. But, yeah,
430
00:19:03.700 --> 00:19:06.339
I just, I mean, I just, I don't know.
431
00:19:06.359 --> 00:19:06.700
I just.
432
00:19:07.779 --> 00:19:09.619
I couldn't even tell you. Friends, maybe?
433
00:19:09.640 --> 00:19:11.240
Yeah, I was going to say, do you look at
434
00:19:11.279 --> 00:19:15.750
your friends with greater value? They're like your sisters.
435
00:19:15.910 --> 00:19:20.269
I'm such a loyal ride or die for my friends.
436
00:19:20.369 --> 00:19:22.750
If I love you and that's reciprocated and
the respect
437
00:19:22.829 --> 00:19:24.970
and loyalty is reciprocated, I'll die for you type shit
438
00:19:24.990 --> 00:19:26.859
when I connect with someone. Because that's so important to
439
00:19:26.880 --> 00:19:28.480
me and it's so rare. And because I don't have
440
00:19:29.079 --> 00:19:32.039
Brothers and sisters, like, that is priority is being an
441
00:19:32.079 --> 00:19:32.940
incredible people.
442
00:19:32.960 --> 00:19:33.549
Absolutely.
443
00:19:33.589 --> 00:19:35.970
And an incredible person to the people who are there
444
00:19:36.009 --> 00:19:37.630
for you and love you. And, like, now I have
445
00:19:37.690 --> 00:19:39.269
so many good friends. I mean, actually not so many.
446
00:19:39.289 --> 00:19:41.890
That's a gap. But I have a couple of really
447
00:19:41.910 --> 00:19:44.970
close people that I can go to for anything, anytime, anywhere,
448
00:19:44.990 --> 00:19:47.789
and they're there for me. And I would, like, literally
449
00:19:47.809 --> 00:19:48.950
kill for them type shit.
450
00:19:49.799 --> 00:19:51.880
Not every day you meet an Irish legend.
451
00:19:52.059 --> 00:19:53.400
I know what you mean, Coo Cullum.
452
00:19:53.599 --> 00:19:56.700
Leaping vast distances, holding off armies.
453
00:19:56.839 --> 00:19:58.960
Eating tonnes of fresh grass.
454
00:19:59.119 --> 00:20:02.079
What? Not you or cows. That's one of the reasons
455
00:20:02.279 --> 00:20:06.339
Irish milk is so good. It's famous all over the world.
456
00:20:06.619 --> 00:20:08.279
Legendary.
457
00:20:08.700 --> 00:20:11.779
Ireland's grass and our farmers' commitment to more sustainable actions
458
00:20:12.059 --> 00:20:14.849
help make Irish dairy a true Irish legend.
459
00:20:15.119 --> 00:20:18.069
Always look for the National Dairy Council guarantee. Learn more
460
00:20:18.250 --> 00:20:18.970
at ndc.ie.
461
00:20:20.589 --> 00:20:24.230
With TUI, there's more choice than you think. Beach days
462
00:20:24.390 --> 00:20:25.150
or a city break.
463
00:20:25.559 --> 00:20:26.440
Weekend in Rome?
464
00:20:26.460 --> 00:20:28.839
Booked. Fly from your local airport?
465
00:20:29.119 --> 00:20:29.700
Of course.
466
00:20:30.160 --> 00:20:33.259
Just a hotel? Got them too. Number of nights?
467
00:20:33.640 --> 00:20:34.299
Take your pick.
468
00:20:34.720 --> 00:20:38.630
Tailor your trip with more options and more choice. TUI.
469
00:20:40.329 --> 00:20:43.750
Delicious beef ragu for dinner. Because you can't keep up
470
00:20:43.789 --> 00:20:44.750
with all the group chat.
471
00:20:45.619 --> 00:21:14.269
OK, my other question was, Cause.
472
00:21:14.150 --> 00:21:15.759
This is, we're going to get into the dating shit,
473
00:21:15.799 --> 00:21:19.359
but I wanted to know steroids are obviously a drug.
474
00:21:19.380 --> 00:21:23.839
And I was wondering like, were you able when you
475
00:21:23.880 --> 00:21:27.500
were younger and in your life to separate like your
476
00:21:27.579 --> 00:21:31.029
dad on when, when that was the case versus like
477
00:21:31.529 --> 00:21:34.049
who basically like who he was like when he was
478
00:21:34.130 --> 00:21:36.630
on drugs versus not like, or was it all one
479
00:21:36.710 --> 00:21:38.420
for you? Because, like, I feel like it must have
480
00:21:38.440 --> 00:21:40.579
been hard to differentiate at such a young age.
481
00:21:40.539 --> 00:21:41.779
Of, like, why he was acting. He just, like, kept
482
00:21:41.799 --> 00:21:44.410
it all from me. But I did. So he had... Obviously,
483
00:21:44.430 --> 00:21:47.109
steroids comes with, like, you know, mood swings a little
484
00:21:47.150 --> 00:21:51.650
bit and stuff like that. And I definitely... Excuse me.
485
00:21:51.769 --> 00:21:54.309
I definitely saw it. And, like, I knew he was
486
00:21:54.349 --> 00:21:56.720
on steroids because, obviously, it was, like, public knowledge. I'm
487
00:21:56.759 --> 00:21:58.240
still his daughter. I still know what's going on. I
488
00:21:58.279 --> 00:21:59.900
just don't know, like, to what extent exactly.
489
00:21:59.920 --> 00:22:01.039
Yeah.
490
00:22:02.299 --> 00:22:04.319
Yeah, it was tough. He was moody and he was.
491
00:22:06.529 --> 00:22:08.609
He was always in his head and he was bitter from,
492
00:22:08.930 --> 00:22:10.269
you know, he was already had a reason to be
493
00:22:10.309 --> 00:22:13.670
upset and be bitter, much less. Yeah, he was just
494
00:22:13.710 --> 00:22:16.009
kind of like, I just didn't know what the fuck
495
00:22:16.049 --> 00:22:18.390
steroids was. Like, I didn't know exactly how much he
496
00:22:18.410 --> 00:22:20.640
was taking, like finding out that he was taking like
497
00:22:20.740 --> 00:22:23.720
way above the appropriate dose to get to a certain
498
00:22:23.759 --> 00:22:26.319
point of a certain build, you know.
499
00:22:26.339 --> 00:22:30.000
You obviously also on top of that being public, it
500
00:22:30.019 --> 00:22:32.859
was public that some of your dad's relationships were like
501
00:22:32.920 --> 00:22:34.339
volatile and intense.
502
00:22:34.359 --> 00:22:34.500
Yeah.
503
00:22:34.759 --> 00:22:39.700
Yeah. How did that affect you at a young age? And, like,
504
00:22:39.720 --> 00:22:44.559
how has it affected you with men, I guess? Like,
505
00:22:44.660 --> 00:22:47.559
that's a very public topic I know is probably very sensitive,
506
00:22:47.619 --> 00:22:49.119
and we don't have to talk about it if you're uncomfortable.
507
00:22:49.140 --> 00:22:52.000
No, I'm just trying to make sure the way I, obviously,
508
00:22:52.039 --> 00:22:55.089
articulate it is the way I mean, and I'm getting
509
00:22:55.109 --> 00:22:56.980
my point across properly, because no one's ever asked me
510
00:22:57.009 --> 00:22:57.440
that question.
511
00:22:57.789 --> 00:22:57.990
Yeah.
512
00:22:58.130 --> 00:23:01.470
And this is my second podcast. Take your time. I
513
00:23:01.650 --> 00:23:04.630
think that... Having the kind of dad I did, whether
514
00:23:04.690 --> 00:23:07.720
it was watching him with girlfriends, the cheating or the,
515
00:23:08.349 --> 00:23:11.470
you know, I don't know if he's ever, you know,
516
00:23:11.630 --> 00:23:13.680
laid a hand or done anything. Like, these are things
517
00:23:13.700 --> 00:23:15.299
that I kind of like out of sight, out of mind.
518
00:23:15.319 --> 00:23:17.859
I don't really talk about those kinds of things. I
519
00:23:17.859 --> 00:23:22.319
just don't know. You know what I mean? But I
520
00:23:22.400 --> 00:23:25.910
think just seeing how he was as a partner made
521
00:23:25.970 --> 00:23:29.940
me have this bitter taste to men being like, I
522
00:23:29.960 --> 00:23:32.819
will never be that girl that gets like played. And like,
523
00:23:32.920 --> 00:23:34.769
I just kind of, I move with a more of
524
00:23:34.809 --> 00:23:38.390
a masculine energy, I think. And I'm just like, I
525
00:23:38.410 --> 00:23:39.750
don't know. I'm just not going to like stress about
526
00:23:39.789 --> 00:23:43.470
a fuck boy and like be like, just the way
527
00:23:43.509 --> 00:23:45.190
I treat them. Like I'll have a thing with a
528
00:23:45.210 --> 00:23:46.890
guy and I'll like be talking to them. I won't
529
00:23:46.910 --> 00:23:48.859
even sleep with them. And I'll just like, you know,
530
00:23:48.880 --> 00:23:50.579
we'll like talk and this and that. We'll hang out
531
00:23:50.619 --> 00:23:51.220
and then done.
532
00:23:51.279 --> 00:23:51.539
Boom.
533
00:23:52.200 --> 00:23:53.299
Like over it.
534
00:23:53.339 --> 00:23:54.900
Like all of a sudden one day things will just change.
535
00:23:54.940 --> 00:23:57.259
I'll just be like onto the next type shit. But
536
00:23:57.299 --> 00:23:59.720
maybe that's from seeing my dad be like that and
537
00:23:59.779 --> 00:24:02.640
be such like a fuck boy kind of guy.
538
00:24:02.660 --> 00:24:04.720
Because you saw like the inner workings from your dad.
539
00:24:04.740 --> 00:24:07.089
Of a man and how men feel. I mean, granted,
540
00:24:07.109 --> 00:24:10.170
my dad's probably not a great example of guys, but
541
00:24:10.230 --> 00:24:12.329
that was my example. You know what I mean? That
542
00:24:12.369 --> 00:24:14.150
was my father figure growing up. So it definitely made
543
00:24:14.190 --> 00:24:16.109
me move in a more like cold kind of like.
544
00:24:17.190 --> 00:24:18.740
A lot of guys have been like, wow, you're the
545
00:24:18.759 --> 00:24:20.640
girl version of me. Like, a lot of guys I've, like,
546
00:24:20.700 --> 00:24:22.420
hung out with or dated, they'll be like, wow, you're, like,
547
00:24:22.440 --> 00:24:24.259
literally me in girl form. And I'm like, I know.
548
00:24:24.279 --> 00:24:24.740
I know.
549
00:24:24.759 --> 00:24:27.490
Well, because you're going about it, I kind of, I, that's, I,
550
00:24:28.220 --> 00:24:29.920
not that it's, I don't know if it's healthy or not,
551
00:24:29.960 --> 00:24:30.809
but I say it.
552
00:24:30.829 -->
00:24:32.309
I don't know if any of it's healthy either. I'm
553
00:24:32.329 --> 00:24:33.690
just like, just myself. That's just what it is. Let's
554
00:24:33.730 --> 00:24:34.490
hope for it's healthy.
555
00:24:34.710 --> 00:24:38.170
Yeah, I think, like, I've said at times to... women
556
00:24:38.190 --> 00:24:40.710
that are looking for advice on, like, there's so many
557
00:24:40.769 --> 00:24:42.509
guys that are playing me and I don't know what
558
00:24:42.529 --> 00:24:43.170
I'm doing wrong.
559
00:24:43.190 --> 00:24:45.289
Well, guys are like that. Guys move the way, like,
560
00:24:45.490 --> 00:24:47.339
I kind of move now. They just, like, talk to
561
00:24:47.359 --> 00:24:49.059
a girl, get her hopes up, the girl gets feelings,
562
00:24:49.099 --> 00:24:50.900
and then they bail. Like, I'm on the other end
563
00:24:50.920 --> 00:24:52.279
of that now. And I'm like, if you get feelings
564
00:24:52.299 --> 00:24:56.519
for me, please stay away. Please, just don't call me. Like,
565
00:24:56.539 --> 00:24:58.500
don't text me. Like, I don't know. Also, when I
566
00:24:58.519 --> 00:25:00.299
fall for someone or if I, like, really start liking someone,
567
00:25:00.319 --> 00:25:02.000
it has to be reciprocated because I'll never be the
568
00:25:02.019 --> 00:25:05.460
first one to, like, I'm never the needy one. I'm
569
00:25:05.480 --> 00:25:07.700
never the one that's, like... like calling you every day
570
00:25:07.720 --> 00:25:09.519
let's hang out blah blah like I know and it's
571
00:25:09.539 --> 00:25:10.940
not even a game it's just kind of like how
572
00:25:11.000 --> 00:25:13.140
I am with dating like I love boys I love
573
00:25:13.180 --> 00:25:15.029
dating I think it's fun but I'm never that girl
574
00:25:15.140 --> 00:25:18.849
that is gonna chase one or like go out of
575
00:25:18.890 --> 00:25:21.130
my way to like really be with one or have
576
00:25:21.150 --> 00:25:22.009
you ever told.
577
00:25:21.750 --> 00:25:27.509
A guy you loved him first yes yes really yes
578
00:25:27.890 --> 00:25:32.150
um my my last relationship wow was that hard for
579
00:25:32.190 --> 00:25:32.819
you to.
580
00:25:32.779 --> 00:25:34.579
Say that it was hard because the first time I
581
00:25:34.619 --> 00:25:37.380
said it he didn't say it back yeah but he
582
00:25:37.400 --> 00:25:39.079
said it ended like a week later and like whatever
583
00:25:39.519 --> 00:25:42.940
but um what was that like it was I so
584
00:25:43.140 --> 00:25:44.880
it was at a point where I was comfortable enough
585
00:25:44.900 --> 00:25:46.680
to say it because I knew that we loved each
586
00:25:46.740 --> 00:25:49.380
other we were getting so close to a point where
587
00:25:49.400 --> 00:25:51.099
I was just like I know he like loves me
588
00:25:51.119 --> 00:25:52.890
and has love for me we're just it's just a
589
00:25:53.220 --> 00:25:55.349
scary thing to say especially I think for him it
590
00:25:55.369 --> 00:25:57.069
was just like you know a moment a hump to
591
00:25:57.089 --> 00:26:01.490
get over um and you took it no so when
592
00:26:01.529 --> 00:26:02.910
I said it and it didn't say it back I
593
00:26:02.910 --> 00:26:05.339
was just like That is a shit feeling, and I
594
00:26:05.380 --> 00:26:07.740
don't want to feel it ever again. But I'm honestly, like,
595
00:26:07.819 --> 00:26:10.099
the older I get, the more I'm just, like, down
596
00:26:10.140 --> 00:26:12.029
to express myself. If I feel a certain way about you,
597
00:26:12.039 --> 00:26:14.039
I'm going to let you know. I'd rather be an
598
00:26:14.099 --> 00:26:16.900
open book than play games and, like, not to... You
599
00:26:16.920 --> 00:26:18.390
know what I mean? Like, if I feel something, I'll
600
00:26:18.410 --> 00:26:19.130
tell you. I'm not afraid.
601
00:26:19.369 --> 00:26:21.210
I actually agree with you in the sense of, like,
602
00:26:21.390 --> 00:26:25.440
I would never say... that I love someone first unless
603
00:26:25.700 --> 00:26:28.440
I knew it was going like I knew.
604
00:26:28.279 --> 00:26:30.420
It we had like a joke about it yeah yeah.
605
00:26:30.319 --> 00:26:32.769
So you weren't like out of nowhere the crazy girl
606
00:26:33.089 --> 00:26:35.569
I love you and it's like read the room bitch
607
00:26:35.730 --> 00:26:38.190
like what is going on self-awareness don't say it now
608
00:26:38.450 --> 00:26:40.269
right no I feel you totally here we go you're
609
00:26:40.289 --> 00:26:43.240
a Scorpio I am I was like literally reading up
610
00:26:43.319 --> 00:26:44.859
on Scorpios you have to tell me if this.
611
00:26:44.799 --> 00:26:48.430
Is true I'm a very cliche Scorpio, so I've learned.
612
00:26:48.490 --> 00:26:49.359
I think so, yeah.
613
00:26:49.450 --> 00:26:53.079
Okay, they said, Scorpio women are universally known as the
614
00:26:53.259 --> 00:26:55.680
sex goddesses of Zodiac.
615
00:26:55.980 --> 00:26:57.460
Josie! Oh my god!
616
00:26:57.900 --> 00:27:01.480
Renowned for their passion, their strong libidos, and their exceptional
617
00:27:01.619 --> 00:27:05.049
prowls as lovers. Sex is extremely important to these women,
618
00:27:05.190 --> 00:27:07.869
and sharing a sexual connection with their deeply bonded lover
619
00:27:07.930 --> 00:27:10.769
is necessary for them to feel completely fulfilled in life.
620
00:27:10.910 --> 00:27:11.869
That being said.
621
00:27:12.329 --> 00:27:15.170
Scorpios don't really love to sleep around, nor do they
622
00:27:15.210 --> 00:27:18.349
take sex casually. So until they find their soul match,
623
00:27:18.390 --> 00:27:21.410
a Scorpio can feel a little adrift without a partner.
624
00:27:21.430 --> 00:27:22.609
Is that true?
625
00:27:24.490 --> 00:27:27.450
Yes, the first half a little bit. Also, in the
626
00:27:27.470 --> 00:27:30.190
sleeping around sense as well, it takes... So I have
627
00:27:30.230 --> 00:27:32.609
a rule. Oh, tell us your rule. So minimum a
628
00:27:32.670 -->
00:27:35.450
month of knowing someone, getting to know them. Like if
629
00:27:35.490 --> 00:27:37.490
I'm seeing someone or talking to someone, minimum a month
630
00:27:37.529 --> 00:27:40.089
to two months, depending on how close we get, how quickly...
631
00:27:40.299 --> 00:27:42.180
Before I end up sleeping with them or doing anything
632
00:27:42.220 --> 00:27:42.500
with them.
633
00:27:42.940 --> 00:27:45.299
Okay, what I posted on my Instagram the other day,
634
00:27:45.480 --> 00:27:48.180
which I was dying because so many women were, like,
635
00:27:48.440 --> 00:27:49.210
relating to it.
636
00:27:49.299 --> 00:27:52.619
I've heard that before. Have you? Yeah, so I've heard it. So, typically,
637
00:27:52.640 --> 00:27:54.680
I think I saw a TikTok about it. It was, like, someone, like,
638
00:27:55.069 --> 00:27:58.029
public speaker, just, like, a TED Talk type thing. Being, like,
639
00:27:58.069 --> 00:28:01.009
your first love is... So do you want to say
640
00:28:01.029 --> 00:28:02.289
what it was? Yeah.
641
00:28:02.369 --> 00:28:02.589
Okay.
642
00:28:02.609 --> 00:28:04.319
So I came up because I was looking for books.
643
00:28:04.359 --> 00:28:06.240
I'm like, I think it would be fascinating to start
644
00:28:06.299 --> 00:28:09.079
reading books and then relating it into the podcast because
645
00:28:09.440 --> 00:28:10.519
we love to be educated. Yeah.
646
00:28:10.579 --> 00:28:11.119
Yeah.
647
00:28:11.140 --> 00:28:13.079
So the book is called You Only Fall in Love
648
00:28:13.180 --> 00:28:17.519
Three Times. And apparently the three people is number one
649
00:28:17.640 --> 00:28:20.039
is the soulmate. And the soulmate introduces us.
650
00:28:20.140 --> 00:28:21.119
It is the first love.
651
00:28:21.160 --> 00:28:22.160
Yes. The first love.
652
00:28:22.180 --> 00:28:22.329
Okay.
653
00:28:22.720 --> 00:28:26.210
Introduces us to the dream of love but somehow what
654
00:28:26.289 --> 00:28:28.730
seemed like it would be happily ever after wasn't meant
655
00:28:28.769 --> 00:28:30.509
to last forever and it's like your soulmate and.
656
00:28:30.549 --> 00:28:33.529
I can relate to this right and isn't it crazy like.
657
00:28:33.650 --> 00:28:36.609
I'm thinking of the person just like yes and they
658
00:28:36.630 --> 00:28:38.750
just showed you like what love was then the next
659
00:28:38.849 --> 00:28:42.250
is we're so consumed with making the karmic love work
660
00:28:42.509 --> 00:28:45.009
that we often fail to question whether it even should
661
00:28:45.069 --> 00:28:47.410
work as painful as it is to accept this love
662
00:28:47.690 --> 00:28:50.279
that felt so right in the beginning is actually all
663
00:28:50.299 --> 00:28:52.779
wrong for you. And so a lot of girls, like, right?
664
00:28:52.859 --> 00:28:54.900
This is crazy. I'm just, like, I'm applying it to
665
00:28:54.940 --> 00:28:57.339
my life. Because I've had two people that I've been, like,
666
00:28:57.960 --> 00:29:00.579
truly head over heels in love with, like, would marry
667
00:29:00.619 --> 00:29:01.200
them type shit.
668
00:29:01.259 --> 00:29:01.519
Wow.
669
00:29:01.680 --> 00:29:04.000
And so I'm like, my third's next. And, like, thinking
670
00:29:04.039 --> 00:29:04.859
about that, I'm just like.
671
00:29:05.200 --> 00:29:08.289
nervous yeah because the third one my house you're like
672
00:29:08.329 --> 00:29:11.150
where is he the third one guys is the twin
673
00:29:11.190 --> 00:29:13.789
flame comes into our lives and often we don't even
674
00:29:13.849 --> 00:29:16.150
know it's love because it's.
675
00:29:16.069 --> 00:29:18.390
Too easy this is the love who helps us to
676
00:29:18.430 --> 00:29:20.980
accept ourselves just as we are because this is precisely
677
00:29:21.019 --> 00:29:22.920
what they do everyone's like alex this is fucking call
678
00:29:22.940 --> 00:29:24.539
her daddy what are you doing right now No, but
679
00:29:24.579 --> 00:29:26.299
I read this and I was like, oh, my God.
680
00:29:26.319 --> 00:29:27.700
And then Josie DM to me and was like, oh,
681
00:29:27.700 --> 00:29:29.299
my God, I can already think of the two of them.
682
00:29:29.359 --> 00:29:33.269
So can you walk us through again? We're not naming names,
683
00:29:33.309 --> 00:29:35.650
but I think you kind of walking us through a
684
00:29:35.710 --> 00:29:38.970
relationship that you knew. Oh, my God, this person is
685
00:29:38.990 --> 00:29:39.569
like my soulmate.
686
00:29:39.609 --> 00:29:39.970
I love this.
687
00:29:40.049 --> 00:29:42.309
Person and it didn't work out and how you walk
688
00:29:42.349 --> 00:29:45.519
away and kind of dissect just like some of the
689
00:29:46.150 --> 00:29:48.259
pros and cons and all the things because i think
690
00:29:48.279 --> 00:29:49.880
a lot of girls are like wait but if it's
691
00:29:49.920 --> 00:29:51.180
your soulmate what the fuck.
692
00:29:51.180 --> 00:29:53.700
I know that's what you think and you work you
693
00:29:53.720 --> 00:29:55.000
work i promise this i'll go but i swear i
694
00:29:55.019 --> 00:29:58.759
just hit the puff last night stupid thing um yeah
695
00:29:58.779 --> 00:30:00.880
so my first relationship my first love like my first
696
00:30:00.920 --> 00:30:03.740
like real love was four years and he was with
697
00:30:03.759 --> 00:30:05.920
this musician who was like always on the road always
698
00:30:05.960 --> 00:30:08.339
traveling always in the studio working touring whatever like kind
699
00:30:08.359 --> 00:30:10.329
of that that the musician life of like you know
700
00:30:10.490 --> 00:30:12.190
girls on the bus getting fucked up every night this
701
00:30:12.210 --> 00:30:15.250
and that um but we were so in love and
702
00:30:15.289 --> 00:30:17.809
so obsessed um and it was I think it was
703
00:30:17.829 --> 00:30:20.990
just kind of like It started off a little rocky.
704
00:30:21.049 --> 00:30:23.029
I think the trust wasn't always there because both of
705
00:30:23.089 --> 00:30:25.019
our jobs and what we did. We were young. I
706
00:30:25.039 --> 00:30:29.160
was 18. He was, like, 25, 26. Okay. And we just, like,
707
00:30:29.200 --> 00:30:31.720
were so in love, but, like, in a controlling way. Like,
708
00:30:31.759 --> 00:30:34.039
I just knew, like, we started off... We, like, formed
709
00:30:34.079 --> 00:30:36.539
bad habits that we didn't know how to break as
710
00:30:36.640 --> 00:30:38.579
we progressed more and more, like, years and years down
711
00:30:38.619 --> 00:30:41.460
the road. And we would just, like, fight all the time.
712
00:30:41.480 --> 00:30:43.160
And what I learned also is, like, so we would
713
00:30:43.200 --> 00:30:44.869
party a lot because he was, like, kind of, like,
714
00:30:44.900 --> 00:30:46.720
a party boy and that was, like, his brand and whatever.
715
00:30:46.740 --> 00:30:46.809
And.
716
00:30:48.809 --> 00:30:50.450
And we'd travel the world together and party, but we
717
00:30:50.470 --> 00:30:52.210
would argue when we partied. And I think because the
718
00:30:52.289 --> 00:30:56.630
alcohol intensifies the emotions and the environment, the girls and
719
00:30:56.650 --> 00:30:59.380
throwing themselves at him, whatever it was, it was hard
720
00:30:59.430 --> 00:31:00.930
because we were so in love, but we were in
721
00:31:01.359 --> 00:31:03.619
one of the most toxic environments for what our love
722
00:31:03.680 --> 00:31:06.480
was and for what it needed. And we were also young.
723
00:31:06.539 --> 00:31:09.799
I was learning. I was growing up. My coping mechanisms
724
00:31:09.839 --> 00:31:13.299
back then for heartbreak were a lot different. We were
725
00:31:13.339 --> 00:31:15.000
super on and off, so whenever we'd break up, I'd
726
00:31:15.039 --> 00:31:17.000
be like, I'm going to go out in L.A. and, like,
727
00:31:17.039 --> 00:31:18.680
do this and go to this guy's after party and
728
00:31:18.700 --> 00:31:20.339
be around these people and blah, blah, blah. Like, fuck
729
00:31:20.380 --> 00:31:23.740
you type shit. Like, more spiteful and, like, toxic behavior. Absolutely.
730
00:31:23.759 --> 00:31:25.559
Because you're younger. And, like, that's what I would have done.
731
00:31:25.579 --> 00:31:27.539
All I knew. I was just like, fuck it. Totally.
732
00:31:28.200 --> 00:31:31.099
And then we just kind of. So my process with
733
00:31:31.240 --> 00:31:34.220
it was that we were together for four years. And
734
00:31:34.279 --> 00:31:37.109
we fought so much and just kind of couldn't. We
735
00:31:37.119 --> 00:31:38.730
tried to make it work so many times. We were
736
00:31:38.750 --> 00:31:40.349
just like, let's try this. Let's do this. Let's make
737
00:31:40.369 --> 00:31:41.869
it work. I love you enough. Like, let's just fucking
738
00:31:41.910 --> 00:31:45.650
do it. Eventually, I fell out of love. Like, eventually,
739
00:31:45.690 --> 00:31:47.539
I just kind of was like, it's not there for
740
00:31:47.559 -->
00:31:49.400
me anymore. Like, I kind of just fell out of love.
741
00:31:50.059 --> 00:31:52.019
Loved him to this day. Like, love him to death.
742
00:31:52.059 --> 00:31:55.339
Will always, like, want the best for him. But passion-wise and, like,
743
00:31:55.420 --> 00:31:57.099
for me to, like, continue to be with someone, it
744
00:31:57.140 --> 00:31:59.470
just wasn't there anymore. And even then, I tried to
745
00:31:59.509 --> 00:32:02.369
stay a little bit longer. I think we both did. Because,
746
00:32:02.410 --> 00:32:05.269
you know, loyalty and love and That unconditional– the idea
747
00:32:05.289 --> 00:32:07.559
of unconditional love in marriage is, like, you go through
748
00:32:07.599 --> 00:32:10.140
hard times. Like, how are people married for, like, 50,
749
00:32:10.140 --> 00:32:10.640
60 years?
750
00:32:10.660 --> 00:32:12.680
Yeah. You think– And it's hard when you, like– because
751
00:32:12.700 --> 00:32:14.660
I'm sure every– I feel like every couple does. Like,
752
00:32:14.680 --> 00:32:17.369
you talked about probably marriage and babies and all the things.
753
00:32:17.410 --> 00:32:18.809
All the time. You go there. I think there was
754
00:32:18.849 --> 00:32:20.329
a point where he was, like, about to, like, propose
755
00:32:20.349 --> 00:32:22.690
to me. Like, we talked about, like– we were– like,
756
00:32:22.710 --> 00:32:24.609
we had promise rings and this and that. Like, we
757
00:32:24.630 --> 00:32:28.500
were just, like, so in love but so young and– And, yeah,
758
00:32:28.519 --> 00:32:31.119
and so we just kind of, like, eventually one day, like,
759
00:32:31.180 --> 00:32:33.369
something popped off. And, like, I remember, like, going on
760
00:32:33.400 --> 00:32:37.630
his phone and finding something that, like, really bothered me.
761
00:32:37.829 --> 00:32:39.990
And I was already, like, I was already ready to go.
762
00:32:40.029 --> 00:32:41.769
I was, like, one more thing happens and, like, I
763
00:32:41.789 --> 00:32:44.289
just see myself, like, having that switch and it's flipping
764
00:32:44.309 --> 00:32:48.750
and it's done. Right. And, yeah, then that happened and
765
00:32:48.769 --> 00:32:50.710
I just kind of was, like, I got to go.
766
00:32:50.910 --> 00:32:52.450
One of us has to go. Right. This is bad.
767
00:32:52.569 --> 00:32:53.569
One of us has to go and if one of
768
00:32:53.609 --> 00:32:55.730
us doesn't go... We're going to end up hating each other.
769
00:32:55.849 --> 00:32:58.279
And like, this can't, I have to think about myself
770
00:32:58.339 --> 00:33:00.259
and be selfish, selfish finally.
771
00:33:00.880 --> 00:33:05.299
So when you talk about leaving, because that topic is,
772
00:33:05.319 --> 00:33:10.960
there's so many fucking layers to that. The amount of people, women, men,
773
00:33:10.980 --> 00:33:12.809
I don't give a fuck who it is. When you
774
00:33:12.849 --> 00:33:15.630
make the decision to leave something that you were so
775
00:33:15.690 --> 00:33:18.380
in love with someone, there's history there, there's years there.
776
00:33:18.680 --> 00:33:20.920
And that, I think, is a lot. Like, people are, well,
777
00:33:20.940 --> 00:33:22.599
I just, that was four years of my life. I
778
00:33:22.640 --> 00:33:25.589
can't leave them. It's so hard to see, like, what
779
00:33:25.609 --> 00:33:28.589
life is going to be like without that person. Did you,
780
00:33:28.789 --> 00:33:31.809
were you the type of person that then went... Like,
781
00:33:32.130 --> 00:33:34.670
did you guys keep texting a little after the breakup? Like,
782
00:33:34.730 --> 00:33:37.579
how did you handle moving on? Because a lot of
783
00:33:37.640 --> 00:33:40.319
people write in being like, it's so fucking hard to
784
00:33:40.359 --> 00:33:42.420
go from being in bed with someone every day. They're
785
00:33:42.440 --> 00:33:44.319
your best friend. You love them. And then what? You're
786
00:33:44.339 --> 00:33:46.869
just not supposed to talk? It's literally like morning to death. Like,
787
00:33:46.890 --> 00:33:48.079
how did you go about it?
788
00:33:48.109 --> 00:33:48.170
So.
789
00:33:50.420 --> 00:33:52.759
Obviously, I was a bit younger. My breakup, as soon
790
00:33:52.779 --> 00:33:54.700
as we broke up, I was just, like, I tried
791
00:33:54.740 --> 00:33:56.500
to replace him. I tried to replace it. I was
792
00:33:56.519 --> 00:33:58.680
just kind of, like, dating. I started seeing someone. Like,
793
00:33:58.920 --> 00:34:00.049
I even got to a place where we were, like,
794
00:34:00.089 --> 00:34:00.930
exclusive kind of.
795
00:34:01.769 --> 00:34:02.410
Oh, right away?
796
00:34:02.750 --> 00:34:03.130
Right away.
797
00:34:03.329 --> 00:34:03.569
Wow.
798
00:34:03.650 --> 00:34:05.529
I mean, not right away, but, like, right away. Like,
799
00:34:05.589 --> 00:34:07.509
pretty much. But also, like, keep in mind, I was
800
00:34:07.529 --> 00:34:10.429
already had been checked out of this relationship for, like, maybe, like, five,
801
00:34:10.489 --> 00:34:12.210
six months, like, at least. And I was just kind of, like,
802
00:34:12.670 --> 00:34:16.809
waiting to, like, us to finally separate. And also, when
803
00:34:16.829 --> 00:34:18.710
I was younger, and maybe this stems back to, like,
804
00:34:18.730 --> 00:34:21.929
you know, not having a father figure. always like my
805
00:34:21.989 --> 00:34:24.730
my one figure my one sense of stability within a
806
00:34:24.769 --> 00:34:27.250
man had just collapsed after four years someone i thought
807
00:34:27.269 --> 00:34:28.969
was gonna spend my life with it all collapsed so
808
00:34:29.010 --> 00:34:32.170
i was like i need maybe it was another sense
809
00:34:32.210 --> 00:34:34.130
of like love from a from a guy or a
810
00:34:34.179 --> 00:34:36.780
man or just someone to like make me feel yes
811
00:34:37.050 --> 00:34:39.699
like a male presence just to make me feel happy
812
00:34:39.719 --> 00:34:41.519
and good and complete and like when i was younger
813
00:34:42.800 --> 00:34:44.880
stemming back to like dad shit maybe i thought that
814
00:34:44.920 --> 00:34:47.360
that's what i needed And I've learned now that it's, like,
815
00:34:47.440 --> 00:34:49.039
so not. It's so within.
816
00:34:49.059 --> 00:34:50.360
You need to be on your own for a minute.
817
00:34:50.429 --> 00:34:54.570
Exactly, and go through that healing process. And we definitely
818
00:34:54.610 --> 00:34:57.070
talked a bit. It was more toxic, and we would
819
00:34:57.150 --> 00:34:59.699
argue because he would hear. Like, oh, you're with this guy. Oh,
820
00:34:59.710 --> 00:35:01.989
you're with that guy. Blah, blah. Like, what are you doing?
821
00:35:02.030 --> 00:35:03.960
You fucking hoe. You thought this and that. You know
822
00:35:03.980 --> 00:35:05.480
what I mean? Like, the fucking jealous, whatever.
823
00:35:05.500 --> 00:35:06.320
The emotional, yeah.
824
00:35:06.340 --> 00:35:08.639
So we fought a lot. But then there were times, like,
825
00:35:08.920 --> 00:35:10.300
you know, where we would try and hang out a
826
00:35:10.320 --> 00:35:12.780
little bit. But as much as we, like, even, like,
827
00:35:12.880 --> 00:35:13.139
you know.
828
00:35:15.380 --> 00:35:18.579
Not recently, but up until my last relationship, we kind
829
00:35:18.619 --> 00:35:20.360
of were just dabbling with the idea of making it
830
00:35:20.400 --> 00:35:22.440
work again maybe or hanging out. But every time we did,
831
00:35:22.480 --> 00:35:24.860
it just wasn't there for me. It just wasn't it.
832
00:35:25.019 --> 00:35:27.440
It wasn't like that fire wasn't there anymore.
833
00:35:27.500 --> 00:35:30.480
It's like the soulmate that taught you what love is,
834
00:35:30.579 --> 00:35:34.719
but it's not right. Yeah, totally. I do think that's fascinating, Josie,
835
00:35:34.780 --> 00:35:36.980
because now as you've gotten older, it's interesting because now
836
00:35:37.000 --> 00:35:39.139
you're almost like you were now in a relationship and
837
00:35:39.179 --> 00:35:41.659
now you're single. And instead of running to a new guy.
838
00:35:42.280 --> 00:35:46.719
your I mean you're like please I'm not I'm not.
839
00:35:46.639 --> 00:35:49.059
Alex wait till you see TMZ this week I've got
840
00:35:49.099 --> 00:35:51.800
a new boyfriend I'm like fuck.
841
00:35:51.280 --> 00:35:53.119
No I am I'm being better about it like I'm
842
00:35:53.159 --> 00:35:55.699
not out here like sleeping with anyone I'm not you
843
00:35:55.719 --> 00:35:57.719
know I'm making it very clear that I'm pretty emotionally
844
00:35:57.739 --> 00:36:00.460
unavailable in the sense of just like really wanting the
845
00:36:00.500 --> 00:36:02.719
best for myself and I want to focus so this
846
00:36:02.739 --> 00:36:04.900
is the way I look at it it just none
847
00:36:04.940 --> 00:36:06.960
of these people that I've been with are my person
848
00:36:07.179 --> 00:36:10.340
and I and I
find closure in that in itself
849
00:36:10.519 --> 00:36:13.239
and acceptance and I'm just like That's cool. Like, so
850
00:36:13.260 --> 00:36:15.079
my dad taught me growing up, because whenever I'd, like,
851
00:36:15.099 --> 00:36:16.340
be sad about a boy, like, I had, like, a
852
00:36:16.380 --> 00:36:18.119
high school love that I, like, thought I was in love,
853
00:36:18.159 --> 00:36:20.090
but it was, like, we were, like, 14, 15. It
854
00:36:20.280 --> 00:36:22.869
wasn't real. And I was, like, distraught about it. I
855
00:36:22.869 --> 00:36:24.489
was just so upset. My dad's like, Josie, you're going
856
00:36:24.510 --> 00:36:26.070
to fall in love so many times. You're going to
857
00:36:26.090 --> 00:36:29.489
have so many, like, romances and boyfriends and relationships. Like,
858
00:36:29.570 --> 00:36:31.070
do not do this. And, like, to this day, that
859
00:36:31.090 --> 00:36:34.360
sticks with me. So when any, anytime anything falls apart,
860
00:36:34.380 --> 00:36:34.789
I'm just.
861
00:36:34.679 --> 00:36:35.860
Like, I'm good.
862
00:36:36.420 --> 00:36:39.099
I'm good. We're good. Whether I have someone or have myself,
863
00:36:39.139 --> 00:36:41.059
like I love myself so much right now and I'm
864
00:36:41.099 --> 00:36:43.070
so proud of myself for getting to this point of,
865
00:36:43.619 --> 00:36:47.170
you know, just completely supporting myself, being strong mentally, like,
866
00:36:47.190 --> 00:36:50.630
you know, being very independent and, you know, getting through those,
867
00:36:51.389 --> 00:36:53.849
you know, unhealthy coping mechanisms that I used to have.
868
00:36:54.409 --> 00:36:55.309
And I'm just like, good.
869
00:36:55.610 --> 00:36:57.510
No, that's interesting what your dad told you because it
870
00:36:57.710 --> 00:36:59.800
is so true and I think it's so hard to
871
00:36:59.889 --> 00:37:03.079
tell people that until you experience it. Like, I have
872
00:37:03.119 --> 00:37:04.940
been in love before and I have a boyfriend right
873
00:37:04.980 --> 00:37:08.429
now and like, Those people that I was in love with, I...
874
00:37:08.809 --> 00:37:12.070
At times, right after maybe, I would be like, oh,
875
00:37:12.130 --> 00:37:15.639
I regret that. But, like... You go through the motions. Right?
876
00:37:15.699 --> 00:37:17.800
You're bitter. Yeah. And you miss them. And then you're like,
877
00:37:17.840 --> 00:37:19.559
fuck them. And then you're, like, you're neutral.
878
00:37:19.619 --> 00:37:22.079
And then you're like, holy shit, thank God that happened.
879
00:37:24.079 --> 00:37:30.010
Let's talk about your career. Did you feel, like, a
880
00:37:30.110 --> 00:37:32.989
pressure when you were younger because of the name that
881
00:37:33.050 --> 00:37:33.610
you had?
882
00:37:33.630 --> 00:37:36.329
Oh, yeah. I just... Yeah, because I feel like a
883
00:37:36.349 --> 00:37:40.449
lot of the celebrity kids are, you know, well off.
884
00:37:40.489 --> 00:37:42.340
They have a safety net, something to fall back onto
885
00:37:42.380 --> 00:37:44.559
if they don't want to, like, bust their ass and work.
886
00:37:45.159 --> 00:37:46.719
And that was never the case. Like, when I first
887
00:37:46.739 --> 00:37:51.980
started modeling, I had, like, maybe $ 100 a week to spend.
888
00:37:51.760 --> 00:37:52.659
In New York.
889
00:37:53.219 --> 00:37:55.289
And I was in model apartments where it's, like, six
890
00:37:55.329 --> 00:37:57.510
girls shoved into it. It's, like, three girls per bedroom.
891
00:37:57.530 --> 00:38:00.269
We're all in twin beds. And it's just, like, coexisting
892
00:38:00.329 --> 00:38:03.030
with all these other girls that don't even speak English
893
00:38:03.170 --> 00:38:05.780
or they, like, are smoking in the apartment. Like, I
894
00:38:05.800 --> 00:38:08.909
had nothing. And everyone was like, oh, she's Canseco. Why
895
00:38:08.949 --> 00:38:10.389
doesn't she have this and that? And I'm like, because
896
00:38:10.469 --> 00:38:11.110
I don't have it.
897
00:38:11.110 --> 00:38:12.659
Because I don't have that. I don't have it at all.
898
00:38:12.670 --> 00:38:14.170
I don't have that, but I felt like I had
899
00:38:14.190 --> 00:38:16.409
to always make it seem like I was okay. Like,
900
00:38:16.469 --> 00:38:19.639
I love to, like, not fake it till you make it, but, like,
901
00:38:19.679 --> 00:38:21.079
fake it till you make it. Like, put on a
902
00:38:21.099 --> 00:38:23.079
straight face and make it work and get a cute
903
00:38:23.099 --> 00:38:25.719
style on going to castings and stuff and, Play the part.
904
00:38:25.920 --> 00:38:26.639
That's so crazy.
905
00:38:26.659 --> 00:38:29.630
I didn't even think about that. Like, you, everyone has a, like,
906
00:38:29.809 --> 00:38:32.809
an image that they think you are. Like, you're rich. Yeah.
907
00:38:32.849 --> 00:38:35.610
You're beautiful. Oh, my gosh. She's got, like, the greatest life.
908
00:38:35.750 --> 00:38:37.590
And then you're saying, like, it actually was kind of
909
00:38:37.650 --> 00:38:41.219
the complete opposite in terms of having. Yeah. And so then, wait,
910
00:38:41.239 --> 00:38:44.920
so you were in it with them at what age?
911
00:38:44.920 --> 00:38:48.320
17, 18. And then I would say by the time
912
00:38:48.360 --> 00:38:50.559
I was 19, I kind of, like, had enough of
913
00:38:50.579 --> 00:38:52.380
a clientele. I was making enough money. I was actually making, like,
914
00:38:52.539 --> 00:38:54.619
pretty good bank. Like, the reason why I actually, like,
915
00:38:54.989 --> 00:38:56.599
gave up everything else, started modeling, is because it ended
916
00:38:56.619 --> 00:38:58.260
up being a full-time gig. Like, some of the first
917
00:38:58.280 --> 00:39:01.940
couple jobs I did were massive, big deals, especially in, like,
918
00:39:01.960 --> 00:39:03.360
the fashion industry over in New York.
919
00:39:03.860 --> 00:39:06.320
Wait, that's amazing. Yeah. No, it was
great. So you
920
00:39:06.340 --> 00:39:07.840
finally started making money and you're like, I'm going to
921
00:39:07.860 --> 00:39:08.320
stick with this.
922
00:39:08.340 --> 00:39:10.260
We saw Faith and I was just like, I worked
923
00:39:10.320 --> 00:39:12.199
and worked and worked and I stayed with it and
924
00:39:12.239 --> 00:39:13.989
I adjusted to New York and I just stuck through
925
00:39:14.010 --> 00:39:15.510
with the model apartments and I was just like, I
926
00:39:15.590 --> 00:39:15.949
want it.
927
00:39:15.949 --> 00:39:19.550
I will admit. I wouldn't say now, but, like, prior
928
00:39:19.650 --> 00:39:23.360
to educating myself more on what models go through, I
929
00:39:24.019 --> 00:39:26.429
feel like a lot of people are probably, like, listening
930
00:39:26.469 --> 00:39:28.789
and they're like, hey, like, you have a so fucking easy, like,
931
00:39:28.829 --> 00:39:30.940
you have a perfect body. and you have like no
932
00:39:30.960 --> 00:39:34.780
imperfections can you explain a little bit though about like
933
00:39:35.500 --> 00:39:38.880
what really is the truth about a modeling career and
934
00:39:38.900 --> 00:39:41.860
like what it does take and and body image and
935
00:39:41.880 --> 00:39:44.260
what you go through on a day-to-day basis of trying
936
00:39:44.300 --> 00:39:46.909
to keep and maintain a certain image because I think
937
00:39:47.199 --> 00:39:49.769
people think it's so easy, and I'm going to assume.
938
00:39:49.679 --> 00:39:52.230
It's... I know, there's that stigma that's like, oh, you model, like, whatever,
939
00:39:52.269 --> 00:39:53.250
but it's actually, like.
940
00:39:53.730 --> 00:39:54.989
And also, it comes with also, like, don't you feel
941
00:39:55.010 --> 00:39:56.250
like people are like, oh, you're not, then you have
942
00:39:56.289 --> 00:39:58.670
no talent. And it's like, what? Yeah. Like, I think
943
00:39:58.690 --> 00:40:01.469
people think because I think maybe because the Instagram model
944
00:40:01.530 --> 00:40:02.409
has shifted into.
945
00:40:02.449 --> 00:40:04.139
Now it's like a blurred line of, like, what an
946
00:40:04.219 --> 00:40:05.840
actual model is, but I came up in the more
947
00:40:05.900 --> 00:40:08.139
traditional way that was just, like, the grind to get
948
00:40:08.199 --> 00:40:13.300
there and not having much was hard, and it's definitely, like, for...
949
00:40:13.219 --> 00:40:15.510
I also don't want to give, like, a sob story, like, me, me, me. No,
950
00:40:15.630 --> 00:40:16.210
don't tell us.
951
00:40:16.230 --> 00:40:16.400
But, um.
952
00:40:17.239 --> 00:40:18.489
I can't remember the last time I looked in the
953
00:40:18.510 --> 00:40:21.369
mirror and was happy with how I looked because of
954
00:40:21.429 --> 00:40:24.449
the industry and the competitive nature, especially in New York
955
00:40:24.469 --> 00:40:26.829
City when all the girls are so fucking tiny.
956
00:40:26.849 --> 00:40:27.090
Tiny.
957
00:40:27.269 --> 00:40:29.309
And they go above and beyond to be that small.
958
00:40:29.389 --> 00:40:31.090
At least this is more traditionally back in the day
959
00:40:31.110 --> 00:40:32.650
when that was like what you had to be. Right.
960
00:40:32.829 --> 00:40:34.389
You walk into an agency, they put a measuring tape
961
00:40:34.409 --> 00:40:36.420
around your waist. your bust and your hips. And if
962
00:40:36.440 --> 00:40:37.940
you don't have the right numbers, you're not getting it.
963
00:40:37.940 --> 00:40:40.480
You're not even meeting the directors of it, whatever. Like
964
00:40:40.539 --> 00:40:42.820
it was incredibly, incredibly strict. And that was hard for
965
00:40:42.840 --> 00:40:44.650
me because I was an athlete and I was a dancer.
966
00:40:44.670 --> 00:40:46.929
So I had like more built naturally. I'm just like
967
00:40:46.949 --> 00:40:51.489
a little bit, not thicker, but like athletic, athletic. Yeah. Yeah, exactly.
968
00:40:51.510 --> 00:40:54.309
It really was a lot mentally in the sense of
969
00:40:54.369 --> 00:40:58.300
like what it does to you. And, you know, you
970
00:40:58.320 --> 00:41:00.139
get told no, no, no, no, no.
971
00:41:00.800 --> 00:41:03.699
But to get told no so many times, I can
972
00:41:03.739 --> 00:41:04.900
only imagine the dark place.
973
00:41:04.920 --> 00:41:07.320
You get so defeated. Yeah. And then in New York,
974
00:41:07.340 --> 00:41:09.739
when all the girls are out doing, like, drugs and
975
00:41:09.780 --> 00:41:11.699
shit and partying, it's so easy to get dragged into
976
00:41:11.739 --> 00:41:13.340
that life in New York, especially in New York, because
977
00:41:13.360 --> 00:41:16.090
all the guys, like, all the models can go wherever, whenever.
978
00:41:16.159 --> 00:41:17.070
Same like in L.A., you know what I mean?
979
00:41:17.090 --> 00:41:17.230
Totally.
980
00:41:17.250 --> 00:41:18.389
If you're a hot girl, you can do whatever the
981
00:41:18.409 --> 00:41:20.929
fuck you want. So when you get told no, no, no,
982
00:41:20.969 --> 00:41:23.150
and you... start going into it and you start spiraling
983
00:41:23.170 --> 00:41:24.050
into that dark place.
984
00:41:24.349 --> 00:41:25.789
It's like, let me lose more weight. Let me try
985
00:41:25.809 --> 00:41:27.090
to like figure out how can I.
986
00:41:27.130 --> 00:41:29.769
The weight thing. Cause you're also, so for castings for shows,
987
00:41:29.789 --> 00:41:31.679
you're in a room and there's like a hundred girls
988
00:41:31.719 --> 00:41:33.519
there and you've been there for like six hours waiting
989
00:41:33.559 --> 00:41:35.960
just to walk in a line for a casting director
990
00:41:35.980 --> 00:41:38.059
because of how important that show would be for your career.
991
00:41:38.480 --> 00:41:40.219
It's just a show. You're just walking. It's not even
992
00:41:40.239 --> 00:41:44.619
a campaign. So shows also like you, they don't pay shows,
993
00:41:44.659 --> 00:41:47.429
pay
like $ 500, but shows are so important for the
994
00:41:47.469 --> 00:41:49.429
resume in the fashion world. And it's just like walking
995
00:41:49.449 --> 00:41:51.920
for Gucci is like, they don't really pay. But it's like,
996
00:41:52.059 --> 00:41:53.460
you just walked from fucking Gucci.
997
00:41:53.480 --> 00:41:54.860
You know what I mean? Because then it can get
998
00:41:54.920 --> 00:41:56.199
you a huge campaign. Exactly.
999
00:41:56.239 --> 00:41:58.900
It leads to bigger and better. But yeah, and you
1000
00:41:58.920 --> 00:42:01.119
sit there, and you're just sitting here, and half the
1001
00:42:01.159 --> 00:42:03.329
girls don't speak English. You've never met anyone. There's hundreds
1002
00:42:03.349 --> 00:42:05.670
of girls in the room. And all of them are
1003
00:42:05.710 --> 00:42:08.949
just so perfect and tiny in their walks. And you're
1004
00:42:08.969 --> 00:42:11.769
just like, I'm looking at these girls, and I'm picking
1005
00:42:11.809 --> 00:42:15.250
myself up. to pieces, picking myself apart, looking at all
1006
00:42:15.269 --> 00:42:17.929
these other girls and, like, their thigh gaps and, you know,
1007
00:42:17.949 --> 00:42:19.789
fat on their stomach. They're like, they have none. Like,
1008
00:42:19.809 --> 00:42:22.070
they're fat on their stomach.
1009
00:42:22.530 --> 00:42:23.170
Where'd it go?
1010
00:42:23.309 --> 00:42:25.550
There is none. Yeah, it's just like, and what that
1011
00:42:25.590 --> 00:42:27.150
does to you mentally because you see the girls who
1012
00:42:27.170 --> 00:42:30.329
get the part and that's that girl and you're like, fuck,
1013
00:42:30.369 --> 00:42:32.210
is that what I need to do to book this
1014
00:42:32.269 --> 00:42:34.170
role because you want it so bad? Like, that feeling
1015
00:42:34.329 --> 00:42:36.889
of booking a show or booking a campaign and getting
1016
00:42:36.909 --> 00:42:38.769
that thing that you, like, were aiming for is just
1017
00:42:38.789 --> 00:42:40.849
like a sport when you finally, like, win the Super Bowl.
1018
00:42:40.889 --> 00:42:43.530
It's like, finally walk the BS show or something. I
1019
00:42:43.550 --> 00:42:46.590
don't know. I just, body dysmorphia. I just kind of, like, don't,
1020
00:42:47.070 --> 00:42:49.989
there's always something to tweak and fix. And I'm, like,
1021
00:42:51.070 --> 00:42:54.409
progressively working at getting to a mindset where I'm okay
1022
00:42:54.449 --> 00:42:56.530
and I'm, I feel beautiful. I'm confident. It's not, like,
1023
00:42:56.550 --> 00:42:58.570
a confidence thing. I'm definitely, like, I love myself. I
1024
00:42:58.590 --> 00:43:00.469
love my soul. I love mentally where I've gotten and
1025
00:43:00.489 --> 00:43:03.239
how I've gotten to this point of, like, mental strength.
1026
00:43:03.260 --> 00:43:03.449
Yeah.
1027
00:43:04.659 --> 00:43:08.460
But it's such a dark spiral because it's all based
1028
00:43:08.519 --> 00:43:10.840
on what you look like. Nobody gives
a fuck about
1029
00:43:10.860 --> 00:43:13.179
your personality. You could be the biggest fucking bitch. You
1030
00:43:13.199 --> 00:43:15.000
could be a sweetheart. No one really cares. No one
1031
00:43:15.019 --> 00:43:18.000
cares if you're educated. Totally. You don't speak at all.
1032
00:43:18.019 --> 00:43:19.360
You don't speak to anyone. You don't have a conversation.
1033
00:43:19.400 --> 00:43:21.619
If you do, they think you're too friendly, so they're like, next.
1034
00:43:21.929 --> 00:43:22.949
They want someone who's more, like.
1035
00:43:23.070 --> 00:43:23.869
Fucking new.
1036
00:43:23.949 --> 00:43:24.170
Yeah.
1037
00:43:24.389 --> 00:43:27.070
And I remember that's when we... Before we started talking,
1038
00:43:27.130 --> 00:43:28.949
Daddy Gang, I was talking to Josie, and I was like,
1039
00:43:29.170 --> 00:43:31.489
I watched you on YouTube, and I thought you were
1040
00:43:31.510 --> 00:43:33.530
so articulate. And she was like, oh, my gosh, thank you,
1041
00:43:33.550 --> 00:43:37.969
because I feel like you don't get really an opportunity to, like,
1042
00:43:38.179 --> 00:43:41.599
use your... Like, it's... Your brand is obviously more your model. Like,
1043
00:43:41.619 --> 00:43:43.840
your pictures are perfect. Like, you're amazing. And then it's, like,
1044
00:43:43.920 --> 00:43:47.300
to hear you speak, it's so cool, because you have
1045
00:43:47.320 --> 00:43:48.320
so much more than just.
1046
00:43:48.360 --> 00:43:50.119
I always get nervous, because I'm, like, kind of breaking
1047
00:43:50.159 --> 00:43:52.469
out of that shell and being... Just being in L.A.
1048
00:43:52.550 --> 00:43:54.130
now again and being part of people who are so
1049
00:43:54.190 --> 00:43:56.269
public with their lives and, you know, being on YouTube
1050
00:43:56.329 --> 00:43:58.369
or whatever it may be, like, I'm getting used to it.
1051
00:43:58.369 --> 00:44:01.070
But it makes me nervous, especially with how accessible information
1052
00:44:01.190 --> 00:44:05.210
is with people and cancel culture. Like, I get nervous to, like,
1053
00:44:05.289 --> 00:44:08.010
and God forbid if you don't have the opinion of
1054
00:44:08.050 --> 00:44:11.159
the majority, then you're, like, shunned. You know what I mean?
1055
00:44:11.199 --> 00:44:14.199
God forbid. Like, even, like, politically, like, it's just hectic.
1056
00:44:14.219 --> 00:44:16.139
It's so hectic right now. I try and stay out
1057
00:44:16.179 --> 00:44:17.559
of it because I just try and stay in my
1058
00:44:17.599 --> 00:44:20.679
own lane. And in person, I'm like, I'll definitely, you
1059
00:44:20.699 --> 00:44:22.239
know what I mean, like, talk about topics that I'm
1060
00:44:22.260 --> 00:44:24.349
passionate about and, like, get into a conversation. I'm, like,
1061
00:44:24.389 --> 00:44:26.670
pretty opinionated. But online, I just don't think there's a
1062
00:44:26.769 --> 00:44:29.809
point to, like, I get influencing people, but it's just,
1063
00:44:29.909 --> 00:44:30.389
it's hectic.
1064
00:44:30.429 --> 00:44:30.880
It is.
1065
00:44:30.889 --> 00:44:33.190
There's always something, a response, a tweet, likes, whatever.
1066
00:44:33.789 --> 00:44:37.389
Have you openly talked about dealing with depression and anxiety?
1067
00:44:37.829 --> 00:44:42.250
Anxiety, yes. Not necessarily depression because, I mean, I've hit
1068
00:44:42.289 --> 00:44:44.909
those points. I've hit, like, really, because I can be emotional.
1069
00:44:44.929 --> 00:44:47.210
I'm a little Scorpio, so, like, I can. in my
1070
00:44:47.269 --> 00:44:50.900
feels um and I've hit those points but like I
1071
00:44:50.980 --> 00:44:53.679
really really try so hard to not get to those
1072
00:44:53.739 --> 00:44:58.039
points because I'm disappointed in myself uh just the things
1073
00:44:58.079 --> 00:44:59.869
I'm I do the things I'm capable of when I
1074
00:45:00.050 --> 00:45:02.849
am like in that dark place and I try and
1075
00:45:02.889 --> 00:45:06.030
stay incredibly optimistic you know the glass is um half
1076
00:45:06.050 --> 00:45:08.210
full right half empty and look at the bright side
1077
00:45:08.250 --> 00:45:10.679
of things and I've learned, it took a while to
1078
00:45:10.719 --> 00:45:12.780
train your mind to be this way, but.
1079
00:45:12.980 --> 00:45:15.099
Could I ask you, and you can say no, but, like,
1080
00:45:15.139 --> 00:45:19.199
when you were saying you, you see, like, you recognize
1081
00:45:19.260 --> 00:45:21.670
when you're, like, going down that dark path, like, could
1082
00:45:21.690 --> 00:45:23.929
you give us an example for anyone that may be like, oh,
1083
00:45:23.969 --> 00:45:24.730
I do that too?
1084
00:45:25.590 --> 00:45:28.329
I just, like, it's hard to say, like, one example, like,
1085
00:45:28.429 --> 00:45:30.630
one specific, like, it's just a domino effect of, like,
1086
00:45:30.730 --> 00:45:33.230
me being hard on myself, because I'm such a fucking
1087
00:45:33.309 --> 00:45:35.199
critic on myself, like, I get so hard on myself, like,
1088
00:45:35.239 --> 00:45:36.949
I'm saying, like, I can't remember the last time I
1089
00:45:36.949 --> 00:45:38.650
looked in the mirror and was, like, satisfied with what
1090
00:45:38.670 --> 00:45:41.070
I look like. Like, that's not cool. Right. That's not right.
1091
00:45:41.380 --> 00:45:44.440
So whenever I see myself having those thoughts, I'm just like, Joes, like,
1092
00:45:45.340 --> 00:45:49.199
you're good. But it's just, like, a domino effect of, like, oh, like,
1093
00:45:49.260 --> 00:45:51.440
this is wrong and this is wrong and, oh, I
1094
00:45:51.480 --> 00:45:53.760
gained this weight this week and, oh, my skin's dry
1095
00:45:53.780 --> 00:45:56.199
and whatever and spiraling and my family and then financially
1096
00:45:56.219 --> 00:45:57.260
and what if I, you know what I mean?
1097
00:45:57.320 --> 00:45:58.099
Yeah, and then it spirals.
1098
00:45:58.219 -->
00:46:00.360
Everything starts. I just think, like, I have, like, a
1099
00:46:00.389 --> 00:46:03.170
door for the most part. I have a door and
1100
00:46:03.190 --> 00:46:05.179
for the most part the door is closed. To all
1101
00:46:05.239 --> 00:46:07.179
things that are out of my control and things that
1102
00:46:07.199 --> 00:46:09.940
will bring me down. But sometimes the door is cracked
1103
00:46:10.440 --> 00:46:13.239
because mentally, whatever I'm going through, whether it be a
1104
00:46:13.280 --> 00:46:15.739
breakup or family issues like that door opens up and
1105
00:46:15.760 --> 00:46:18.530
I'm in a vulnerable place. things fucking pour in naturally
1106
00:46:18.719 --> 00:46:20.079
and it's out of my control and that's when my
1107
00:46:20.119 --> 00:46:22.440
anxiety kind of like some days it's like crippling like
1108
00:46:22.460 --> 00:46:24.980
i don't want to socialize like i've been super introverted
1109
00:46:25.019 --> 00:46:27.159
lately too like really not i have been too i
1110
00:46:27.179 --> 00:46:29.659
feel like i'm just like because the pandemic i'm just
1111
00:46:29.679 --> 00:46:31.179
like i was in a relationship but now i'm just
1112
00:46:31.199 --> 00:46:33.190
like i pain i kick it i'm yeah i just
1113
00:46:33.250 --> 00:46:35.309
also like i'm just in a work mode like i
1114
00:46:35.349 --> 00:46:36.389
don't do you.
1115
00:46:36.230 --> 00:46:38.630
Like being alone i love it yeah i do too
1116
00:46:38.710 --> 00:46:39.429
i love.
1117
00:46:39.269 --> 00:46:41.119
It But, yeah, so when I– because I think, like,
1118
00:46:41.300 --> 00:46:43.599
I am, like, you know, only child alone, like, not
1119
00:46:43.619 --> 00:46:45.340
much family, whatever. Oh, that's true. But when I find
1120
00:46:45.389 --> 00:46:47.130
that person, like I said, with, like, friends and stuff,
1121
00:46:47.170 --> 00:46:50.449
I'm just like, oh, hi. Like, I'm just, like, cuddly
1122
00:46:50.469 --> 00:46:51.789
and more sweet and just, you know.
1123
00:46:51.809 --> 00:46:53.969
Like, you're so good at being on your own, but
1124
00:46:54.030 --> 00:46:57.090
you welcome having a partner or someone.
1125
00:46:56.650 --> 00:47:00.210
To– I cherish having those connections with people. I think, like,
1126
00:47:00.289 --> 00:47:02.849
love and relationships and loyalty is some of the most
1127
00:47:02.909 --> 00:47:05.250
beautiful things that you can bring to someone and get
1128
00:47:05.309 --> 00:47:06.090
out of someone. Wow.
1129
00:47:08.030 --> 00:47:10.679
Have you ever been in a situation where you're hooking
1130
00:47:11.099 --> 00:47:13.860
just exclusively... Like, not exclusively. You're hooking up with someone,
1131
00:47:13.900 --> 00:47:15.960
but you don't know if they're hooking up with other people.
1132
00:47:16.019 --> 00:47:16.360
Or no.
1133
00:47:16.440 --> 00:47:17.119
You're always.
1134
00:47:17.219 --> 00:47:17.400
Yeah.
1135
00:47:17.920 --> 00:47:21.449
Of course. Of course.
I mean, well, yeah. Yeah. Yeah,
1136
00:47:21.469 --> 00:47:23.909
I have. And because we don't really have the conversation.
1137
00:47:23.929 --> 00:47:26.050
And this is the thing also. Like, I'm never... It
1138
00:47:26.090 --> 00:47:27.969
takes a while for me to be the one to, like,
1139
00:47:28.030 --> 00:47:29.969
bring it up. Yeah. Because I'm cool, too. Like, I'm
1140
00:47:30.030 --> 00:47:32.219
cool with us doing our own thing, but... Once the
1141
00:47:32.239 --> 00:47:34.809
feelings grow and it's been, like, a couple months of
1142
00:47:34.869 --> 00:47:36.849
us doing the same thing, talking every day, and, like, two,
1143
00:47:36.869 --> 00:47:38.769
three months comes along and, like, we haven't done anything
1144
00:47:38.809 --> 00:47:41.980
about it, then I'm like... Do you ever ask? Yeah. No,
1145
00:47:42.019 --> 00:47:43.079
I've asked. I've asked.
1146
00:47:43.199 --> 00:47:43.699
I've asked.
1147
00:47:43.780 --> 00:47:47.070
How do you ask? Um, I was just like, I'm
1148
00:47:47.090 --> 00:47:48.630
trying to think exactly what I said. Because it's, like,
1149
00:47:48.650 --> 00:47:49.329
group verbatim.
1150
00:47:49.650 --> 00:47:51.860
Yeah, no, because it's, like, I think it can really
1151
00:47:52.260 --> 00:47:54.440
turn people off. Just, like, I've had guys ask me,
1152
00:47:54.460 --> 00:47:55.659
and then I'm more turned off.
1153
00:47:55.840 --> 00:47:56.280
Yeah.
1154
00:47:56.400 --> 00:47:57.340
It's a weird, annoying.
1155
00:47:57.380 --> 00:47:58.079
It's a weird question.
1156
00:47:58.159 --> 00:47:58.239
Yeah.
1157
00:47:58.260 --> 00:47:59.019
And it's just kind of, like.
1158
00:47:59.280 --> 00:48:02.199
It's hard, because if you're enjoying yourselves, and then someone asks, but, like,
1159
00:48:02.239 --> 00:48:04.539
I get why they're asking, and I've asked that sometimes,
1160
00:48:04.579 --> 00:48:06.280
but it has to be... I don't know, it's hard.
1161
00:48:06.320 --> 00:48:07.280
When did you ask?
1162
00:48:08.179 --> 00:48:08.980
Well, it was, um.
1163
00:48:09.900 --> 00:48:11.940
It was three months of talking to someone every single day.
1164
00:48:11.960 --> 00:48:15.440
We were pretty public at the time also, but we
1165
00:48:15.480 --> 00:48:18.559
had never had the, like, exclusivity conversation, and so eventually
1166
00:48:18.599 --> 00:48:21.820
I was just like, yeah, so... It was actually, like,
1167
00:48:21.860 --> 00:48:24.639
Valentine's Day the next day, and I was, like, didn't
1168
00:48:24.699 --> 00:48:26.860
know if, like, he had a plan or what, and
1169
00:48:26.900 --> 00:48:31.369
we were together the night before, and I was like, yeah, so... well,
1170
00:48:31.670 --> 00:48:33.110
what are we doing here? Like, I would just like
1171
00:48:33.130 --> 00:48:34.929
to know for my sake, because I also, like, I
1172
00:48:34.969 --> 00:48:36.829
think sometimes it's good to clarify what it is, because
1173
00:48:36.869 --> 00:48:39.320
God forbid, like,
one person slips up, or if I
1174
00:48:39.340 --> 00:48:40.719
were to go do something and hook up with someone else,
1175
00:48:40.739 --> 00:48:42.679
and then he's like, well, fuck you, you did that, bye. Like,
1176
00:48:42.840 --> 00:48:45.559
let's clarify it so it's healthy and not, like, a
1177
00:48:45.699 --> 00:48:48.139
messy situation. Because always being in that middle area with, like,
1178
00:48:48.199 --> 00:48:51.849
feelings but no label is always, like, can get hectic.
1179
00:48:51.909 --> 00:48:53.030
And how did it go?
1180
00:48:53.050 --> 00:48:54.429
Not good.
1181
00:48:54.469 --> 00:48:54.869
He, uh.
1182
00:48:57.940 --> 00:48:59.280
He was like, this is all I have to give
1183
00:48:59.340 --> 00:49:01.800
right now. This is like, this is it. This is like,
1184
00:49:02.460 --> 00:49:05.440
I can't do anymore. And I disappeared from his life.
1185
00:49:05.519 --> 00:49:08.579
I just like ghosted full blown. Because I'm like that also.
1186
00:49:08.699 --> 00:49:11.639
And the way he went about it just kind of
1187
00:49:11.639 --> 00:49:14.380
like rubbed me the wrong way. And I'm also like,
1188
00:49:14.380 --> 00:49:16.590
it took so much in me to even ask that
1189
00:49:16.590 --> 00:49:19.380
question and then to be rejected. And then and then
1190
00:49:19.420 --> 00:49:21.440
I was just like, fuck this. Like, this is not
1191
00:49:22.079 --> 00:49:22.800
what I'm doing.
1192
00:49:22.860 --> 00:49:25.219
I respect that. I do think it's like, if you,
1193
00:49:25.239 --> 00:49:28.110
if you are, cause I think a lot of times
1194
00:49:28.199 --> 00:49:30.590
people get in a situation where they want to know,
1195
00:49:31.090 --> 00:49:34.010
but even no matter what the answer, sometimes they're not
1196
00:49:34.050 --> 00:49:37.079
going to walk. So, like, if you're listening and you
1197
00:49:37.099 --> 00:49:40.590
want to ask him, like, hey, what is, what are we?
1198
00:49:40.710 --> 00:49:43.090
And he's going to say, oh, I'm just not there
1199
00:49:43.150 --> 00:49:46.449
right now. Well, what? Know what you want when he
1200
00:49:46.489 --> 00:49:48.059
gives you answer A or B.
1201
00:49:48.090 --> 00:49:48.570
Yeah, of course.
1202
00:49:48.590 --> 00:49:50.409
Because sometimes girls go into it and they're like, what
1203
00:49:50.489 --> 00:49:52.469
are we? And he's like, oh, like, I'm just chilling.
1204
00:49:52.510 --> 00:49:55.519
And she's like, okay, yeah, me too. I'm just chilling too.
1205
00:49:55.760 --> 00:49:56.579
And then she's all upset.
1206
00:49:56.599 --> 00:49:58.739
Yeah, whatever you want. Yeah, totally.
1207
00:49:58.760 --> 00:50:00.360
And then you go home and you're crying. And it's like,
1208
00:50:00.619 --> 00:50:03.239
if you go into it, that's my one advice. If
1209
00:50:03.280 --> 00:50:06.090
you're going to ever ask someone what we are, know
1210
00:50:06.159 --> 00:50:08.789
kind of like Josie knew. Like, if he gives you
1211
00:50:08.829 --> 00:50:10.869
that answer, you knew you were kind of going to walk.
1212
00:50:11.190 --> 00:50:12.369
That is way more healthy.
1213
00:50:12.469 --> 00:50:15.429
Eventually, I mean, after three months of time and after like,
1214
00:50:15.449 --> 00:50:17.130
you know, if you're like traveling with this person, like
1215
00:50:17.170 --> 00:50:19.780
we were like pretty much fucking like we were doing it.
1216
00:50:19.789 --> 00:50:22.150
We were sleeping together, fully like together. And then when
1217
00:50:22.170 --> 00:50:23.449
it comes down to him being like, I don't want
1218
00:50:23.469 --> 00:50:24.909
a relationship. I was just like, that's such a fuck
1219
00:50:24.949 --> 00:50:26.289
boy thing that I'm not going to put up with.
1220
00:50:26.409 --> 00:50:27.570
I know I deserve something different.
1221
00:50:28.059 --> 00:50:28.920
I completely agree.
1222
00:50:28.940 --> 00:50:30.730
So I was just like, yeah, I'm good on all that.
1223
00:50:30.849 --> 00:50:33.010
And then we came back around because they always come
1224
00:50:33.030 --> 00:50:33.650
back around.
1225
00:50:33.670 --> 00:50:34.269
They always fucking.
1226
00:50:34.289 --> 00:50:36.570
They always come back around. Especially.
1227
00:50:36.650 --> 00:50:40.050
All of them. When you act like that. When you're like, okay, like.
1228
00:50:40.150 --> 00:50:43.000
When you don't really care because I don't really care.
1229
00:50:43.039 --> 00:50:44.460
I'm not going to stress over like.
1230
00:50:45.380 --> 00:50:48.579
Josie, how to tell if someone wants a relationship or
1231
00:50:48.599 --> 00:50:51.110
just a hookup? The amount of women that write into
1232
00:50:51.139 --> 00:50:54.230
this podcast and they're like, I cannot tell... if he
1233
00:50:54.269 --> 00:50:57.289
wants a relationship, if he wants a hookup. I feel
1234
00:50:57.309 --> 00:51:00.969
like that question in itself gives you the answer. I know.
1235
00:51:01.260 --> 00:51:06.059
It's just being kind of reading a room a little bit.
1236
00:51:06.119 --> 00:51:08.159
This is the thing. You have to know guys. You
1237
00:51:08.179 --> 00:51:09.460
have to know how to play their game, and you
1238
00:51:09.480 --> 00:51:12.159
have to know how they move in order to kind
1239
00:51:12.219 --> 00:51:14.079
of know when they want a relationship and when they don't.
1240
00:51:14.260 --> 00:51:15.800
But the thing is that some guys are just like,
1241
00:51:16.900 --> 00:51:19.760
They'll like lead you into thinking that that's what they want,
1242
00:51:19.840 --> 00:51:21.989
which I've learned is just being upfront from the beginning.
1243
00:51:22.110 --> 00:51:23.730
If you don't want it, that's not what you're looking for.
1244
00:51:23.769 --> 00:51:24.579
Be honest about it.
1245
00:51:25.210 --> 00:51:27.809
Is that what you ask guys? Like, would you be
1246
00:51:27.869 --> 00:51:29.050
upfront and ask a guy that?
1247
00:51:29.530 --> 00:51:31.929
No, I'm the one who says it.
I'll be like,
1248
00:51:31.969 --> 00:51:33.750
like as of recently, like if I'm like dating or
1249
00:51:33.769 --> 00:51:35.889
this and that, I'm just like, I am not looking
1250
00:51:35.989 --> 00:51:41.630
for a relationship. I suggest you don't get feelings. Is that.
1251
00:51:41.650 --> 00:51:41.699
I.
1252
00:51:41.750 --> 00:51:43.750
Is that mean? I don't mean to be mean. I'm
1253
00:51:43.769 --> 00:51:44.150
just like.
1254
00:51:44.170 --> 00:51:45.289
This is why you're on the show.
1255
00:51:45.309 --> 00:51:46.639
I love you. Thank you.
1256
00:51:46.659 --> 00:51:47.980
This is why you're here, Josie.
1257
00:51:48.019 --> 00:51:49.460
No, I do. I did not say that to their face.
1258
00:51:49.519 --> 00:51:51.400
I'm just like, don't... I'm telling you right now. I'm
1259
00:51:51.440 --> 00:51:52.960
not in a place where, like, you're going to be
1260
00:51:53.019 --> 00:51:53.599
safe with me.
1261
00:51:53.679 --> 00:51:55.590
Did you say that before you started dating your last
1262
00:51:55.650 --> 00:51:57.010
ex-boyfriend or no?
1263
00:51:58.329 --> 00:51:58.530
Uh....
1264
00:52:00.940 --> 00:52:03.420
No, because I wasn't in that place. I'm in this
1265
00:52:03.460 --> 00:52:05.079
place because I'm fresh off a breakup and I'm not
1266
00:52:05.119 --> 00:52:07.360
looking to replace it with anyone new. I'm just on
1267
00:52:07.389 --> 00:52:07.800
my own shit.
1268
00:52:07.840 --> 00:52:10.550
But before, I was like... Because I think a lot
1269
00:52:10.590 --> 00:52:13.409
of girls will say that but don't mean it. And
1270
00:52:13.449 --> 00:52:15.309
that's a fucking issue when you're like, I don't want
1271
00:52:15.329 --> 00:52:18.340
a relationship. And my friend Lauren, she recently got out
1272
00:52:18.360 --> 00:52:19.920
of a breakup and she's been saying that to guys
1273
00:52:20.019 --> 00:52:22.739
and they don't believe her. They're like, oh yeah, sure, haha.
1274
00:52:22.760 --> 00:52:24.610
You're gonna go fall in love. And she's like, I
1275
00:52:24.650 --> 00:52:26.429
do not want a relationship.
1276
00:52:26.469 --> 00:52:28.610
That's me right now. To a T. To a T.
1277
00:52:28.650 --> 00:52:30.469
And you're like, how do I make it so clear?
1278
00:52:30.489 --> 00:52:31.989
And they think it's a game. They want to go
1279
00:52:32.030 --> 00:52:33.780
after you even more. They're like, oh, she's emotionally unavailable.
1280
00:52:33.800 --> 00:52:35.340
She doesn't care. Watch me make her fall in love.
1281
00:52:35.380 --> 00:52:36.159
I'm like, I warned you.
1282
00:52:36.320 --> 00:52:36.539
Right.
1283
00:52:37.099 --> 00:52:38.400
I'm really not the one.
1284
00:52:38.440 --> 00:52:41.170
But I think that's good to be upfront about it.
1285
00:52:41.219 --> 00:52:43.400
But I do think if you're on the other end
1286
00:52:43.440 --> 00:52:44.840
of it, you can't tell if someone wants to be
1287
00:52:44.860 --> 00:52:46.559
in a relationship. And I do think that's kind of
1288
00:52:46.579 --> 00:52:48.920
the answer. Like, I feel like a guy you'll know.
1289
00:52:48.940 --> 00:52:50.860
Yeah, if someone wants to be with you, they will
1290
00:52:50.909 --> 00:52:53.050
be with you. They'll show it within their actions, not
1291
00:52:53.070 --> 00:52:56.530
just words. And I think that you'll know. And also,
1292
00:52:56.550 --> 00:52:58.730
it just has to be, like, reciprocated. Like, everything kind
1293
00:52:58.750 --> 00:53:01.349
of has to come together as one. And you'll feel
1294
00:53:01.409 --> 00:53:03.710
that connection. And typically, if you have a feeling, like
1295
00:53:03.769 --> 00:53:06.199
a red flag in your gut... a red flag in
1296
00:53:06.239 --> 00:53:08.320
your gut there's a red flag in the gut there's
1297
00:53:08.380 --> 00:53:09.699
a red flag in my gut I get what you're
1298
00:53:09.719 --> 00:53:11.099
saying you know what I'm saying there's a red flag
1299
00:53:11.119 --> 00:53:12.840
you should just like you know be aware of those
1300
00:53:12.900 --> 00:53:14.659
and be aware of what guys are capable of like
1301
00:53:14.679 --> 00:53:17.329
emotionally they work differently than we do and just kind
1302
00:53:17.349 --> 00:53:21.829
of just don't prioritize it like let it happen organically
1303
00:53:21.909 --> 00:53:23.409
and don't be like oh does he want it does
1304
00:53:23.449 --> 00:53:25.869
he want it like just play it cool be that
1305
00:53:25.929 --> 00:53:28.110
cool girl like don't be too needy don't be too
1306
00:53:28.150 --> 00:53:30.340
up his ass like Let him focus on his work
1307
00:53:30.420 --> 00:53:32.429
and let him come to you. Right. You know?
1308
00:53:32.510 --> 00:53:33.469
And you do the same.
1309
00:53:33.489 --> 00:53:33.710
Exactly.
1310
00:53:33.730 --> 00:53:34.690
Like, go focus on your shit.
1311
00:53:34.710 --> 00:53:37.369
Be that independent boss bitch who, like, doesn't, isn't looking
1312
00:53:37.389 --> 00:53:39.010
for a man. But if the right, if the cards,
1313
00:53:39.269 --> 00:53:41.670
you know, are played properly and it happens, then.
1314
00:53:41.690 --> 00:53:44.630
Because don't, I feel like when, when you feel yourself
1315
00:53:44.750 --> 00:53:47.349
chasing around someone and being more in their shit, it's like,
1316
00:53:47.550 --> 00:53:49.550
pause and be like, you need to be so up
1317
00:53:49.570 --> 00:53:51.400
your own asshole that you don't have time to be
1318
00:53:51.440 --> 00:53:51.860
up someone else's.
1319
00:53:51.900 --> 00:53:52.440
Dead ass.
1320
00:53:52.559 --> 00:53:53.340
And like, go do your shit.
1321
00:53:53.360 --> 00:53:54.780
Because you have this age, too. Like, we have so
1322
00:53:54.800 --> 00:53:58.340
much work to do and so much, like. So much growth, like, internal,
1323
00:53:58.429 --> 00:53:59.159
personal growth.
1324
00:53:59.199 --> 00:54:01.829
Yes. Like, ladies, if you're listening to this, like, and
1325
00:54:01.869 --> 00:54:05.050
you find yourself constantly wondering what he wants, then you're
1326
00:54:05.070 --> 00:54:06.030
not focusing enough.
1327
00:54:05.909 --> 00:54:06.389
On other shit.
1328
00:54:06.469 --> 00:54:07.610
Why do you have enough time to even question that?
1329
00:54:07.630 --> 00:54:09.170
And if he doesn't make it clear, that's probably not
1330
00:54:09.190 --> 00:54:10.650
the guy you want to be with, regardless. If he
1331
00:54:10.670 --> 00:54:11.980
wants to be with you, he's going to be with you.
1332
00:54:11.989 --> 00:54:13.510
He wants to call you and see you and talk
1333
00:54:13.530 --> 00:54:16.130
to you. He's going to call you. Like, it's not
1334
00:54:16.170 --> 00:54:17.130
that hard, you know?
1335
00:54:17.210 --> 00:54:18.010
I agree.
1336
00:54:18.030 --> 00:54:19.349
There you have it.
1337
00:54:19.389 --> 00:54:21.150
What is next for you? You're going to shoot in.
1338
00:54:22.449 --> 00:54:25.230
mexico yes i'm going to mexico on uh what day
1339
00:54:25.250 --> 00:54:27.030
is it it's on sunday going to mexico on sunday
1340
00:54:27.050 --> 00:54:28.909
for the week to shoot this cover that i can't
1341
00:54:28.929 --> 00:54:30.550
say what it is but i'm really excited about it
1342
00:54:30.590 --> 00:54:32.400
yeah i'm excited also just like a little mexico trip
1343
00:54:32.559 --> 00:54:35.360
and you're single right now i am single very single
1344
00:54:35.440 --> 00:54:36.960
like really just focus on me.
1345
00:54:36.920 --> 00:54:40.079
How long do we think that's gonna last a while.
1346
00:54:39.780 --> 00:54:41.820
I think i mean i think i don't know it's
1347
00:54:41.980 --> 00:54:42.860
kind of hard to tell i.
1348
00:54:43.139 --> 00:54:45.829
Just don't unless you find that to inflame I've had.
1349
00:54:45.710 --> 00:54:47.949
People, you know, since my last relationship that I've like
1350
00:54:47.969 --> 00:54:50.940
really cared for and really gotten really close with. But
1351
00:54:51.139 --> 00:54:53.320
like I said, I'm just like, I can't give myself
1352
00:54:53.440 --> 00:54:55.219
up to a partner the way I'd like to right now.
1353
00:54:55.260 --> 00:54:58.260
Like I have so much personal growth to go through
1354
00:54:58.320 --> 00:54:59.949
and I have so much I want to accomplish. And
1355
00:54:59.989 --> 00:55:03.630
I find myself being way more focused and motivated without
1356
00:55:03.650 --> 00:55:06.059
a partner. like getting my shit done. And like, sometimes
1357
00:55:06.079 --> 00:55:08.179
you get comfortable in a relationship and you, you know,
1358
00:55:08.219 --> 00:55:09.900
kind of just like, you're like, oh, I have this
1359
00:55:09.940 --> 00:55:11.920
safety net, this love and this person. You don't really
1360
00:55:11.980 --> 00:55:14.130
crush it as much as you should be crushing it.
1361
00:55:14.280 --> 00:55:17.980
And I agree. So yeah, I'm single. I'm single for
1362
00:55:18.000 --> 00:55:21.019
a while. Tomorrow. I'm like, I'm in a relationship. Maybe
1363
00:55:21.039 --> 00:55:22.199
change the podcast.
1364
00:55:22.599 --> 00:55:24.739
Josie, thank you so much for coming on and telling
1365
00:55:24.800 --> 00:55:25.380
us your story.
1366
00:55:25.460 --> 00:55:26.480
You're amazing.
1367
00:55:26.539 --> 00:55:27.119
Thank you.
1368
00:55:27.969 --> 00:55:31.769
Okay, Daddy Gang, that is it for this week's episode.
1369
00:55:32.110 --> 00:55:36.610
I hope you guys enjoyed Josie's story, the insight, and
1370
00:55:36.800 --> 00:55:40.320
just her overall vibe is fucking amazing. And I'm so
1371
00:55:40.360 --> 00:55:43.119
fortunate to have met her and been able to sit
1372
00:55:43.159 --> 00:55:47.500
down with her and have a new friend. So thank you, Josie, again.
1373
00:55:47.559 --> 00:55:50.920
Go show her love in the DMs, Daddy Gang. Next
1374
00:55:51.559 --> 00:55:56.179
week is about to, honestly, I don't even, I'm not
1375
00:55:56.219 --> 00:55:58.699
even going to try to explain it. All you need
1376
00:55:58.780 --> 00:56:03.820
to know is next week is fucking therapy time, bitches.
1377
00:56:04.030 --> 00:56:07.349
Next week, we are really looking inward and we're going
1378
00:56:07.389 --> 00:56:10.590
to have a lot, a lot, a lot of introspective
1379
00:56:10.630 --> 00:56:13.469
moments because if you follow me on social media, you
1380
00:56:13.510 --> 00:56:15.710
know I've been recently obsessed with a show called Couples
1381
00:56:15.730 --> 00:56:19.570
Therapy and Bitches. The therapist flew across the motherfucking country
1382
00:56:19.650 --> 00:56:22.730
and she's coming next week to sit down with the
1383
00:56:22.789 --> 00:56:26.590
motherfucking tiny kittens. Oh my God, I can't even say
1384
00:56:26.610 --> 00:56:30.010
it without getting chills. Dirty gang, you know the motherfucking drill.
1385
00:56:30.210 --> 00:56:32.869
I will see you fuckers next Wednesday.
1386
00:56:46.969 --> 00:56:49.050
Not every day you meet an Irish legend.
1387
00:56:49.230 --> 00:56:50.570
I know what you mean, Cú Chulainn.
1388
00:56:50.769 --> 00:56:53.869
Leaping vast distances, holding off armies.
1389
00:56:54.010 --> 00:56:56.130
Eating tonnes of fresh grass.
1390
00:56:56.289 --> 00:56:56.630
What?
1391
00:56:56.730 --> 00:56:58.010
Not you, we're cows.
1392
00:56:58.289 --> 00:57:01.150
That's one of the reasons Irish milk is so good.
1393
00:57:01.389 --> 00:57:03.530
It's famous all over the world.
1394
00:57:03.800 --> 00:57:05.420
Legendary.
1395
00:57:05.880 --> 00:57:08.960
Ireland's grass and our farmers' commitment to more sustainable actions
1396
00:57:09.239 --> 00:57:12.019
help make Irish dairy a true Irish legend.
1397
00:57:12.300 --> 00:57:15.239
Always look for the National Dairy Council guarantee. Learn more
1398
00:57:15.420 --> 00:57:16.579
at ndc.ie.
1399
00:57:17.760 --> 00:57:21.409
With TUI, there's more choice than you think. Beach days
1400
00:57:21.570 --> 00:57:22.329
or a city break.
1401
00:57:22.730 --> 00:57:23.610
Weekend in Rome?
1402
00:57:23.630 --> 00:57:26.010
Booked. Fly from your local airport?
1403
00:57:26.289 --> 00:57:26.869
Of course.
1404
00:57:27.329 --> 00:57:30.429
Just a hotel? Got them too. Number of nights?
1405
00:57:30.809 --> 00:57:31.469
Take your pick.
1406
00:57:31.889 --> 00:57:35.800
Tailor your trip with more options and more choice. TUI.
1407
00:57:37.500 --> 00:57:40.920
Delicious beef ragu for dinner. Because you can't keep up
1408
00:57:40.960 --> 00:57:41.920
with all the group chat.
1409
00:57:42.630 --> 00:57:43.789
Make your mark.
1410
00:57:43.829 --> 00:57:46.949
Always choose beef with the Bored Be A Quality mark.