Follow my journey living with mental illness and discover the hard-fought lessons learnt along the way.

My name is Elliot Waters and I am the host of 'The Dysregulated Podcast'.

I live in Australia and have recently graduated with an Honours degree in Psychology. But of most significance is that I am juggling multiple psychological disorders. These disorders have shaped and influenced my past, present and future. It is through the lens of "lived experience" that my stories are told. It is my aim to present a podcast that lifts the veil around mental health, educates and provides hope. I have an open book policy as far as my story and experiences go, and through the podcast I delve into the darkest corners of my psyche, but also tell of the successes I have had and the wisdom gained from my experiences.

I aim to make a podcast which offers a holistic perspective of mental illness, in a way that is easily understood and resonates with listeners. We all know what sadness feels like. The same can be said for disappointment, regret, shame and other negative emotions. And although our experiences and memories are truly unique, by telling our stories we can discover that we are all fighting our own battles and aren't alone on our journeys. I certainly don't shy away from the difficulties I have faced over the years. Yet I am hopeful I can offer hope that you, me and those we care about that may be in the midsts of a mental health episode can find meaning and purpose, and a way out of mental distress.
 

I am fortunate to deliver mental health presentations to school and community groups across Australia for the Black Dog Institute. In many ways the podcast serves as an extension of these presentations. The idea behind the lectures is to share my lived experience with mental illness, explore the lessons I have learned along my journey and to help facilitate the all important conversation around mental health for those that need it. The stigma is still a barrier for many to seek help and it is a clear goal of mine to try and normalise speaking about mental health and to empower myself and others to take the steps needed to improve one's life. Hopefully, my podcast is in keeping with these ambitions.

Although, it must be said that wasn't the original aim of the podcast. Initially I wanted to create a journal of sorts where I could express and explore how I was feeling, week-to-week. I'm not particularly good at keeping a paper journal, even though I know all the benefits it can bring. I am far more comfortable talking instead of writing! So the podcast was to be the medium to jot down and analyse how I was tracking. And if people actually listened? Even better!

The other important objective of the podcast is to flex my Psychological science credentials! Recently I graduated with an Honours degree in Psychology and I use the podcast to dive into the theories and therapies I have studied in my degree and try to explain them in a way that resonates with my audience. By doing so I try to make psychology more accessible to my listeners, and it also helps with retaining (and in many cases, rediscovering) the material I have spent many late nights studying!
 

Well, 'The Dysregulated Podcast' certainly isn't a money-maker, so I will have to persist with my day job for now! But I do try to release at least one episode per week. The frequency of episodes produced definitely depends on my mood. As mental illness is something I live with each and every day it can have a significant bearing on output and subject material. But that is partly the beauty of the show, at least in my opinion. My audience certainly comes along for the ride, during the good and bad. But doing episodes is definitely a great way to alleviate some of the symptoms I suffer from. It's like a self-therapeutic intervention.

All costs of the show are covered by existing income. I don't publish the podcast looking for money, it is all about spreading the important messaging around mental illness and hopefully encouraging others to take the next step on their journey towards peace of mind. So the way I see it is I don't incur any costs, as it is a privilege to share my story with audience and in many cases being afforded the honour to hear their experiences as well.
 

As I said in the previous response, I do it for the love of mental health awareness! I don't gain any income or revenue from the show. Which is fine by me as it certainly isn't about money. It is all about the privilege of being able to share my story to my audience, earning the trust of the listeners and being honoured to hear the experiences they have had with mental illness. I'm committed to doing my part in trying to help improve the understanding around mental illness and maybe, just maybe, making a difference to somebody who may need it. Thats all the payment I need.

The podcast has benefited me in many ways. As said previously, it acts as my journal. So I am able to express my thoughts, feelings and emotions which helps greatly as far as my own mental health is concerned. It also gives me an opportunity to explore subjects I learnt during my Psychology degree and to dive that little bit deeper to make sense of what mental illness is all about. But of the most significance I believe is the fact the podcast has proven to be a platform where others have been able to reach out and together we can help each other with our respective burdens we carry. The sense of community that is developing around the show is truly something special and I am thankful for it everyday.
 

I use a Blue Yeti USB microphone and Adobe Audition to record and edit the show. It is a pretty basic setup but the show is all about being real, honest and genuine so the need for fancy effects isn't really part of the shows DNA. Most recordings are done in my study where I have set up carpet and rugs to keep the audio clean and warm.

I do a few different types of episodes which require their own unique way to prepare. Some episodes are fortnightly check in's, where I explain how I am feeling in that moment, what doctor appointments I've had since the last check in and things like medication changes and how that process is going. So those episodes don't require as much preparation as I am basically just pressing record and speaking quite candidly about my experiences. Other episodes though I dive into the literature around Psychology and Psychiatry and mental health in general. These episodes require extensive reading of the literature, watching lectures and re-reading material from my degree. A lot of work, but it is extremely important that the information I present on the show is accurate, up to date and readily understood. And finally, many of the episodes centre on my own personal story where I delve into some of my most difficult moments as chronicled in my personal journal. I analyse how I was feeling at that time, my experiences and the mindset I was in when my journal entry was written. So I'm required to really do some soul searching and re-live in many cases some of my most difficult challenges. And before I press record I make sure I am able to tap into these different moments and draw from them the wisdom and lessons that I've taken with me.

The next evolution of the podcast will be to interview guests who also have a lived experience with mental illness. For this I have the Rode Wireless 2 system which I think will work perfectly for interviewing out in the field. Again, simplicity is key for me and the Rode Wireless 2 ticks the box.
 

'The Dysregulated Podcast' can be found on most podcasting platforms. About 65% of listeners tune in via Spotify but many also use Apple Podcasts and my website.

The majority of listeners are from my home country of Australia, although my audience spans across the globe. As time has gone on more and more listeners are tuning in from the US, UK, Italy and Argentina in particular. My message around mental health I think is quite universal so I'm not surprised that those from other countries appear to be able to resonate with my story.

I advertise the podcast on my own social media channels, in particular Instagram. But the data tells me that word of mouth is proving to be just as influential as far as new listeners go. It is this organic channel of marketing which I think ensures the best outcomes, certainly as far as listener retention is concerned.
 

As with most things in life, including mental health battles, I think the key to successful podcasting is perseverance. For many podcasts, mine included, it is very much a slow burn. But if the quality and content is there, audiences tend to grow quite quickly. And its a great feeling seeing your hard work pay off! Especially when the content delivered is quite personal.

I would still call myself a bit of a novice when it comes to this whole podcasting thing. So internet resources have been extremely helpful in getting the show off the ground. A simple YouTube or Google search can resolve an issue or question very quickly. Knowledge is power as they say and the more I read and learn about what it takes to create a successful podcast the better my output becomes.

As I suffer from mental illness, at various times I have questioned whether it was worth continuing with the show and have at times lost the confidence in my abilities to achieve the goals I have set. But, I've discovered how important feedback from those you trust is. Although my podcast is a very personal project without too much input from others, receiving feedback from those I trust has been extremely helpful. So my advice is be open to suggestions and feedback from others! Because if you're like me and can have clouded judgement or maybe a lack of confidence, supporters of what you are trying to achieve can bring a sense of objectivity, which can ensure you stay on track and produce something really special.
 

I encourage others to reach out if they wish via Instagram @elliot.t.waters There people can contact me to talk about some of the material I have dived into on the podcast, suggest some topics they would find helpful for me to discuss and in many cases just to have a chat about mental illness. As I said before, a real sense of community is developing around the show which amazing.

Those suffering from mental illness often feel alone in their journeys, and I am hopeful that 'The Dysregulated Podcast' goes some way in showing that we are all engaged with our own battles. But, together we can share our burdens and achieve something really special. And that is, peace of mind.