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Hi friends, welcome back to another episode of What If It All Works Out?
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Conversations for the Overthinker Turned Overcomer.
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I am your host, Davi.
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If you are new here, it's always a pleasure to have you.
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If you are returning, it's an even more pleasure to see you again.
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Season two, episode eight.
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We have made it.
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We're almost at 20 episodes.
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I really can't believe it, but we're here.
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And I thank you.
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I thank God.
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I thank myself for allowing us to get this far.
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So you've been riding this journey with me.
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I appreciate you, and I am um really excited for what's ahead and all the things.
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But we are here.
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So let's get into this episode, and this won't be long because I've been reflecting, and I really do just want us to take a moment here.
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And my question to you guys is have you ever looked at your life and thought I should be doing more, maybe being more productive, more disciplined, more consistent, more successful, more fit, maybe more organized, more accomplished, more of this, more of that.
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And somehow, even when you're doing all of those things, you feel like you're not doing enough, right?
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Because I know that feeling.
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And I think sometimes we can become so obsessed with becoming the next version of ourselves that we forget to actually live as the version of ourselves we are today.
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And today I want to give us permission to pause, right?
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To take a selah moment is what I like to call it.
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If you um read the read the Bible, you may have seen the word selah or selah, I'm not sure exactly how to pronounce it, but um selah is a word in the book of Psalms that we see throughout scripture, and while its exact meaning is debated, it's often understood as that moment to pause, reflect, and consider what you just heard, right?
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And I think we need more sela moments in our lives, especially me.
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Because not every moment needs to be more productive, not every season needs to be about becoming.
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Sometimes you just need to be.
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So take this episode as your reminder to check in with your mind, your body, your soul, and your spirit.
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Ask yourself, where are you?
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How are you?
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And
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most importantly, are you actually enjoying life?
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Because I had to ask myself this question lately.
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I've just been feeling so overwhelmed, and it has taken a toll on me.
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You guys know that I skipped a week of podcasting.
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You're not seeing my face for the second time in a row, right?
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It's showing out really how I'm feeling, but I'm still making the effort to show up.
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However, last week I had an appointment actually with a mental health professional because honestly, I feel like I need help, like, not help in the way that you might think.
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Okay, I wasn't going there because I feel like my life was falling apart.
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I actually went because I feel like I needed serious help with my productivity, like I'm trying to figure it all out at the same time, and I was asking myself for the past couple weeks, why can't I get everything done?
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Why am I struggling to stay consistent?
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Why do I feel like I'm always behind?
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Do I need to take another look at my life?
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Do another life analysis?
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What is happening?
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So that's when I made the appointment, and she started to take a look at my life.
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And when I say she really looked at my life, we talked for about two hours before we concluded.
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She looked at the things that I'm pursuing actively, the goals that I'm working toward, the commitments that I've um made, the things that I'm trying to balance, and how all of it is affecting my overall well-being.
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Right?
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And we got to the end of that conversation, and essentially we came up to the conclusion.
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She was like, Whoo, girl, like she was tired by the end of the conversation.
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And essentially, she's like, girl, you are doing too much.
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And I had to laugh.
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I'm like, girl, I know, I know, I have a lot going on.
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And it made me think about when we would be in talking stages with our guys or girls, right?
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And they would be like, Sorry, I'm distant.
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I really just got a lot going on right now.
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I can't really do this.
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And I really felt that in that moment.
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Like, even if I try to date, I don't know how that would fit in my life because I really do have a lot going on.
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Like, I baby, I cannot focus on you right now.
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I got too much on my plate to add you to this, you would not feel seen, heard, or valued, right?
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No shade.
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So, I mean that with love.
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I am humbly booked and busy, but apparently too booked and busy.
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What I realized is that my desire to be successful and high achieving has me putting my hands in way too many baskets.
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I have all of these dreams, all of these ideas, all of these things that I want to accomplish, and honestly, I think it comes from some type of like internal trauma.
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I don't know.
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I have to dig a little deeper because why do I want to be high achieving?
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Is what I asked myself.
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Not that that's a crime, not that that's a problem.
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I think it's important to have ambition and want to succeed.
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Maybe I'm overthinking it.
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I don't know.
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Is it is it a crime to be overachieving or high achieving?
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To have all these dreams, have all of these ideas, all of these things I want to accomplish, right?
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And the problem, I believe, isn't that I have dreams.
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I think what the challenge is is that I keep trying to actively pursue every single one of them at the same time.
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And when you do that, something has to give.
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For me, it started affecting the things that should not essentially be sacrificed, like my sleep, my eating habits, movement, my energy, my ability to focus, my overall wellness.
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And the funny thing is that we've talked about this before, guys.
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Like, if you've been listening and you've been tuning in for a minute, you know that in a couple episodes ago, you remember me talking about trying to figure out how to balance all the things.
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Like, I was doing that in real life.
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We went over my list and we prioritized some things and put some things on back burner, but that still wasn't enough.
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This time I had to like address it differently with someone else to help me and guide me.
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I realized that I don't want to spend my entire life trying to fix myself or trying to achieve something.
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I don't want to constantly be thinking about the next thing that I need to improve about myself, the next goal I need to hit, the next level I need to reach, the next version of myself I need to become.
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Because essentially, when does it end?
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When do you become
satisfied?
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When do I get to look around and say I'm actually okay?
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When do I get to enjoy what I've worked for?
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When do I get to appreciate the person I've become?
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When do I get to sit in the life that God has given me without immediately asking myself, okay, what's next?
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And maybe, friend, you need to hear that as well because we are allowed to enjoy our life before it's perfect.
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Okay, we are allowed to love ourselves while we are still growing, we are allowed to stop growing for a second and just be.
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We're allowed to be proud of who we are, even though things are still needing work.
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You're allowed to sit in the present without turning the present into another project, because sometimes we treat our lives like we're in constant renovation, especially in this self-help world.
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So, although this podcast is about the journey from overthinking to overcoming, I want us to also understand that it's okay to love who you are in the present and take a moment to just be without feeling like you need to pursue anything or become something.
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I have this tattoo on the back of my neck of a spiral because I do believe that life is ever evolving, and we're going to always grow from something if we allow the lessons, if we embrace the lessons.
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You know?
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So it's okay.
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Don't think in a place of okay, do we need to fix this?
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We need to improve that, we need to lose this, we need to accomplish this thing.
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We're constantly looking at ourselves through a lens of what's missing.
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Right?
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And it's important to think about okay, what is already here?
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What about the things that you've prayed for that you have now?
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I'm literally sitting in an answer prayer.
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I'm just in awe of how far I've come.
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It's important for me to take moments to thank God and be present in that.
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Think about the person you used to be who will be amazed at who you are today.
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Can you celebrate her?
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Can you celebrate him?
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Can you celebrate yourself without immediately attaching another goal to it?
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And this is when I think about Ecclesiastes.
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Ecclesiastes 2 and 3.
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Um, the writer talks about seasons, right?
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A time to plant, a time to harvest, a time to work, a time to rest, a time for everything under heaven.
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I think sometimes we understand the concept of seasons intellectually, but we don't actually live like we believe it.
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I want to read a part in Ecclesiastes 3 that I love.
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It says in verse 9, what do people really get for all their hard work?
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I have seen the burden God has placed on us all, yet God has made everything beautiful for its own time.
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He has planted eternity in the human heart, but even so, people cannot see the whole scope of God's work from beginning to end.
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So I concluded there is nothing better than to be happy and enjoy ourselves as long as we can.
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And people should eat and drink and enjoy the fruits of their labor, for these are gifts from God.
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That should encourage you to be okay, to sit for a second, take it in, and understand that God gives you these things to enjoy.
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You don't have to consistently work.
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It's okay to rest, it's okay to enjoy what you've put your work into.
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Right?
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We want to see the results immediately.
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We want to build something and immediately move on to the next thing.
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But what if there's also a season where you're supposed to enjoy the fruit?
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Because there is.
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Think about sitting down, right?
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Breathe, look around and say, Wow, look at what God has done.
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Maybe the next thing isn't another goal.
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Maybe the next thing is rest.
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Maybe the next thing is booking a dinner with your friends or taking yourself out on a date, sleeping in, going outside, go dilly-dally.
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It can look like having a key key with your girls or your family and doing absolutely nothing productive with your day.
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And realize that even in that, your life still has value.
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Because you are not only valuable when you're accomplishing something, you don't have to earn the right to rest.
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I've talked about this with us before, and this is my reminder to myself.
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I think that's my C-La moment.
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I'm learning that there is a difference between being stagnant and being still.
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Stillness doesn't mean I give up on my dreams.
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It doesn't mean I'm not ambitious or that I don't want more, right?
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It means that I understand that I can want more without
rejecting what I have today.
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I can have goals and still rest.
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I am ambitious, but I can still have fun.
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I can want to grow and still love who I am today.
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I can build something beautiful without making my entire life about the building.
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We talked about soft life and all these things, and that's like a part of it to be okay with yourself.
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You're not a constant project under renovation.
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So if you've been feeling overwhelmed lately, know that you can build something without making your entire life about the building.
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If you feel like you're behind, if you feel like you have a million things on your plate, or if you're constantly thinking about the next version of yourself, I want you to pause.
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Take a breath, look around because this is your life.
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Not the life that you are waiting for, not the life you think you will have once you hit the goal, not the life you'll have when you finally become the person you've been trying to become.
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This one, this moment, this season, this version of you.
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I want you to love her, I want you to love him.
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Love yourself here.
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Because one day you're gonna look back on this exact season and realize you are living in an answer prayer.
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You are so busy trying to um get somewhere else that you never stop to smell the roses.
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So, again, take this as your reminder.
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You don't have to fix everything today, you don't have to accomplish everything today, you don't have to become everything.
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Let this be your seal moment, and when you're ready, you can keep going, you can pick it up again, you can do the next thing, but don't think you have to rush.
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So, journal prompt.
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What would change if I stopped treating my life like something that constantly needs to be fixed and allowed myself to simply enjoy where I am?
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Think about if you have dreams that you're trying to pursue all at once.
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What are you currently doing that's draining more than it is fulfilling you?
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And before you close your journal or your notes, I want you to write an affirmation.
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I don't have to rush through this season.
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I am allowed to be here.
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Because if you choose not to rush through this season, what if it all works out?
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And that is it for season two, episode eight of What If It All Works Out.
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Conversations for the Overthinker.
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As always, remember to like, share, subscribe, comment, all the things.
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Follow us on Instagram at weawo-i-i a w o two underscores.
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Again, friends, we're in this together.
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You deserve stillness, you deserve to enjoy your life where you are.
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And never forget that.
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Thank you so much for listening, and I'll see you in our next talk.