TRANSKRIP 🔗
WEBVTT
NOTE
Transcription provided by Podhome.fm
Created: 4/3/2025 5:13:52 PM
Duration: 1711.36
Channels: 1
1
00:00:00.160 --> 00:00:18.865
Hello. It is Ryan, and we could all use an extra bright spot in our day, couldn't we? Just to make up for things like sitting in traffic, doing the dishes, counting your steps, you know, all the mundane stuff. That is why I'm such a big fan of Chumba Casino. Chumba Casino has all your favorite social casino style games that you can play for free anytime, anywhere
2
00:00:19.165 --> 00:00:21.904
with daily bonuses. That should brighten your day,
3
00:00:22.205 --> 00:00:25.645
Actually, a lot. So sign up now at ChumbaCasino.com.
4
00:00:25.645 --> 00:00:27.665
That's ChumbaCasino.com.
5
00:00:30.650 --> 00:00:35.210
No purchase necessary. DTEQ delivery. No purchase necessary. DTEQ delivery. 18 plus. Judy was boring. Hello. Then Judy discovered Chumbacasino.com.
6
00:00:35.210 --> 00:00:36.670
It's my little escape.
7
00:00:36.970 --> 00:00:42.204
Now Judy's the life of the party. Oh, baby. Mama's bringing home the bacon. Woah. Take it easy,
8
00:00:42.864 --> 00:00:43.364
Judy.
9
00:00:44.024 --> 00:00:47.625
The Chumba Life is for everybody. So go to Chumbacasino.com
10
00:00:47.625 --> 00:00:56.925
and play over a hundred casino style games. Join today and play for free for your chance to redeem some serious prizes. Chumbacasino.com.
11
00:01:31.229 --> 00:01:35.810
Listen to the great rhythm of Freddie Rich at his orchestra, the swingy singing of Connie Haines.
12
00:01:36.909 --> 00:01:45.795
And this being Thanksgiving Day, we recall this touching scene. As the good ship Mayflower landed at Plymouth Rock, the captain shouted to the Indian chief.
13
00:01:58.200 --> 00:02:16.535
Costello. Costello, do you realize it's 07:00? Where have you been? Oh, I haven't. I just came from your house. And have I got news for you? What is it? Your cat just had chicken? My cat had chicken. Yep. My cat had chicken. Yep. You mean kittens? Cats don't have chicken. What was that you brought home in a paper bag last night? Had chickens. Well, your cat just had them.
14
00:02:18.755 --> 00:02:20.375
You mean that cat ate my chickens?
15
00:02:20.915 --> 00:02:27.180
He swallowed the chickens bag and all. Why why didn't you take them away from him? You know me, Abbot. I ate the pipe that would let the bag out of the
16
00:02:28.379 --> 00:02:30.480
cat. Oh. I said that wrong.
17
00:02:31.659 --> 00:02:56.160
Well, I've got plenty of other food around the house. Oh, by the way, Abbot What? Being that this is Thanksgiving Day Yes. I I hate to think of you eating alone. What do you mean? What do you say to having Thanksgiving dinner with me? Well, why that's, mighty fine of you, Costello. Good. At what time? 08:00 at your house. Oh, no. No. No. No. No. You'll get no. No. You'll get no turkey at my house. Then how about a little duck? Duck? Yeah. That's a chicken with snow shoes on. Hey, look.
18
00:02:56.940 --> 00:03:06.640
I'm sorry, Costello. You can't come to my house for Thanksgiving. I'm having a dinner for the snooty set. Oh, the snooty set. You heard me. No. I'm not good enough to eat with pigs. No. No. No.
19
00:03:07.739 --> 00:03:35.945
Will you listen to me, please? I'm listener. Tonight, I'm entertaining a few of the 400. A few of the 400. Yes. That's 800 altogether. No. No. No. No. No. No. Just the 400. That's what I said. That's what I said. That's your line. Thank you. Well? Well, just because they weigh a little more than me, that don't make them any better than I am. But how long talk talk then, please? I I couldn't have you at my house. This is going to be a very classy affair. Why I have a I have a little silver tray to brush the crumbs on. Crumbs? Mhmm. Certainly, don't you have crumbs at your table? Sure, rabbit. You're welcome anytime.
20
00:03:37.765 --> 00:03:39.625
There you go. You have absolutely
21
00:03:39.925 --> 00:03:40.745
no finesse.
22
00:03:41.045 --> 00:03:44.505
Know what? I said you have no finesse. What would I do with a finesse?
23
00:03:44.885 --> 00:03:46.825
In California, you don't need a finesse.
24
00:03:48.725 --> 00:03:53.150
If it gets cold, we print on the gas key turn. Alright, customer. Look.
25
00:03:53.530 --> 00:03:55.230
I didn't say War of the radiator.
26
00:03:56.650 --> 00:04:11.005
I didn't say But he's getting like four years. Alright. Look. Look, please. I War now? Alright. Alright. I didn't say furnace in the first place. I said finance finance. I don't know why you're saying it. Alright. You're getting me all mixed up here. Look. I'm trying to tell you listen to me, please.
27
00:04:11.385 --> 00:04:22.200
Your table manners are terrible. The last time you had dinner at my house, you did nothing but reach across the table and grab for the food. So what was wrong with that? What was wrong with that? You've got a tongue, haven't you? Yeah. But I can reach further with my arm.
28
00:04:26.260 --> 00:04:33.705
There you go again, Costello. You seem you know nothing at all about the proper way to eat. You have no etiquette. I got no what? You you have no etiquette.
29
00:04:34.025 --> 00:04:41.324
Etiquette? Yes. You heard me. You don't even know how to say the word etiquette. Yeah. You don't What do you mean? And tickety. No. It's
30
00:04:42.905 --> 00:04:43.724
it's etiquette.
31
00:04:44.025 --> 00:04:55.990
Well, etiquette and tickety is the same thing anyway. So what? Well, I'll go out and I'll buy one of them books on etiquette by Emily Pillar. Emily Pillar? Yeah. That's, that's Emily Post. Okay. I'll read the both of both of them. I'll go from pillar to post.
32
00:04:56.930 --> 00:05:10.415
Well, you should read that book, Costello. It would tell you a lot of things. For instance, which is, proper to use when eating peas? A fork or a spoon? I I don't use either one. Well, how do you eat your peas? Oh, I just slide my lower lip under the plate and thank the peas off the mashed
Load full transcript
potatoes.
33
00:05:12.395 --> 00:05:15.910
That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right the mashed potatoes goes in my ears. Yes. I can imagine.
34
00:05:16.690 --> 00:05:17.190
Sloppy,
35
00:05:17.650 --> 00:05:25.350
Yeah. Yeah. Castello, you haven't got the brains of a two year old child. Oh, I wouldn't say that. Why not? Look at the difference in our ages.
36
00:05:26.450 --> 00:05:37.615
The way you act, I could never have you at my table. Look, Abbot. If you know so much about manners, just answer me this one thing. You want it? Which hand do you stir your coffee with? I stir my coffee with my right hand. That's funny. Most people use a spoon.
37
00:05:40.395 --> 00:05:56.150
That's all happening. That settles it, You ain't got no etiquette. Yeah. That settles everything. I was just about to break down and invite you for dinner, but now you had to be a smart aleck. Wait wait a minute, Abbot. Yeah. You did. Wait a minute. Now you're my old pal. I can't help it. You can't do this to me. Well, I did. You gotta invite me to dinner on Thanksgiving.
38
00:05:56.690 --> 00:06:00.755
I ain't got no place to go. I'm sorry. You can't, you old French dog.
39
00:06:01.455 --> 00:06:04.995
Look at me, Abbot. Yeah. I only weigh ninety pounds now.
40
00:06:05.935 --> 00:06:06.835
Ninety pounds.
41
00:06:07.215 --> 00:06:10.595
Why, you're fifty six inches around the waist. Yeah. But I'm hollow. Alright.
42
00:06:12.300 --> 00:06:31.815
Look. Alright. Alright. You can come to dinner, Costello. But you'll have to make yourself useful. Now get there early and wait on the table. Why should I wait on a table? Why can't I wait in Apollo with the rest of the people? No. No. You dummy. I mean, I want I don't wanna sit on your table waiting. I mean, I want you to help with the serving. Now the first, the first course will be orders. Of course, you know what orders are. Yeah. That's French for leftovers. No. No.
43
00:06:32.195 --> 00:06:42.410
That's all orders are snacks. Now you take care of the ladies first. It's, it's up to you to see that each lady gets a snack. Are the husbands gonna be there? Certainly. Then I ain't gonna do it. What? Do what? I ain't gonna go around snacking the ladies.
44
00:06:43.030 --> 00:06:45.530
Their husbands will be able to come around and snack me.
45
00:06:46.150 --> 00:06:49.290
On second thought, you'd better stay out in the kitchen and help with the iced dressing.
46
00:06:49.910 --> 00:07:01.285
Why haven't? What's the matter? What you said? What what what what's wrong? You ought to be ashamed of yourself talking that way to a boy of my age. What do you mean? I'm just at the age of picking things up like that. Wrong?
47
00:07:02.225 --> 00:07:04.565
Why it's a good thing my mother isn't here.
48
00:07:05.025 --> 00:07:07.685
Oh, the shame of it all. What are you talking about?
49
00:07:08.065 --> 00:07:21.440
How dare you ask me to help with the oyster dress What do you mean? Now look at it. I didn't mind when you said I had to wait for you on a table, and I was only mildly surprised when you asked me to snack all the ladies, especially in front of their husband.
50
00:07:21.820 --> 00:07:24.345
But when you have the nerve to ask me to go
51
00:07:29.145 --> 00:07:31.325
out in the kitchen and dress a bunch of naked oysters, you not only humiliify me, but you have impuged
52
00:07:31.785 --> 00:07:33.405
on my good name.
53
00:07:42.220 --> 00:07:52.320
Tomorrow on the back cover of Life Magazine, you'll see a very stirring set of pictures under the title pair of aces back to back. A navy dauntless dive bomber attacking a Japanese carrier.
54
00:07:52.794 --> 00:08:01.534
Notice too the pair of flyers, the pair of aces in the lower left hand corner, and read the words they're saying. I quote, Camel's our cigarettes
55
00:08:01.914 --> 00:08:04.974
suits the throat and the taste to a t, unquote.
56
00:08:06.030 --> 00:08:10.450
C A M E L F. Camels. They're aces with the aces.
57
00:08:10.990 --> 00:08:11.970
Could be with you
58
00:08:14.470 --> 00:08:14.970
too.
59
00:08:17.470 --> 00:08:19.294
Here is Freddie Rich with
60
00:08:22.794 --> 00:08:23.544
Java Dumpsters.
61
00:09:50.985 --> 00:10:16.345
You have to cut out that singing in the kitchen. You're disturbing the guest. What happened? I always sing when I'm making sour milk biscuits. Sour milk biscuits? Sure. We haven't got any sour milk. You will have when I get through singing. And many little baby lips shut down shut down. Nelsonetti better save us money. Alright. Look. Cut the cut the look. What are you doing there? What's all that stuff you're putting in? How to do it? What does it say? First, I gotta put in two tubs of butter. Two tubs of butter. Sure. It says right here in the cookbook. Butter. Two TBS
62
00:10:16.805 --> 00:10:17.305
tubs.
63
00:10:18.325 --> 00:10:19.305
That's tablespoon.
64
00:10:19.685 --> 00:10:21.225
I threw them in two. You threw
65
00:10:22.245 --> 00:10:28.269
what else did you put in there? I put in some flour, salt, baking powder, and three gallops of molasses. Three gallops.
66
00:10:28.570 --> 00:10:33.070
What are gullops? You know Abbott. When you pour the molasses out of the jug, it goes scallop, scallop, scallop.
67
00:10:34.089 --> 00:10:54.385
I I put in three of those. Look, Costello. I I don't want you to do any cooking. I've got a chef coming here to take care of that. I thought you'd be out here singeing the feathers off the goose. Doing what? Singeing singeing. Don't you know how to singe? Sure. I know how to singe. I was singeing when you came in. My man was made up begging. I'm so sorry. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No
68
00:10:54.910 --> 00:10:59.170
Singe singeing gets the down off the goose. Didn't you
ever get down off a goose?
69
00:11:00.870 --> 00:11:01.370
Oh.
70
00:11:03.070 --> 00:11:05.410
Oh. Did you read that right? Yes.
71
00:11:06.270 --> 00:11:12.084
Well, didn't you? Did I have a what? Didn't you ever get down off a goose? No. I got down off a horse. No. No.
72
00:11:12.464 --> 00:11:14.725
No. No. I never rode a goose.
73
00:11:15.345 --> 00:11:18.165
No. It's that much windmill. Oh, thank goodness.
74
00:11:18.545 --> 00:11:23.290
Here comes the chef. Hey. I got on chocolate. Yes. Cooking. I'm at the end.
75
00:11:29.030 --> 00:11:29.530
Chisel,
76
00:11:29.910 --> 00:11:31.610
don't tell me that you're the cook.
77
00:11:32.470 --> 00:11:33.290
Could be.
78
00:11:34.835 --> 00:11:39.815
You know something over in Paris I am known as the famous French chef Pierre Rene.
79
00:11:40.275 --> 00:11:46.135
You're the great Rene? That's I am. Yeah. Then what are you doing in California? Oh, I always come here in the rainy season.
80
00:11:48.115 --> 00:11:49.110
The rainy season? Yeah.
81
00:11:51.350 --> 00:11:52.329
This guy's a washer.
82
00:11:54.709 --> 00:12:09.175
Never mind that, Costello. Look. We've gotta get my Thanksgiving dinner cooked, please. Kitsil. You'll find all the utensils in that big cupboard over there. Oh, please pass utensils. You say, who needs your utensils? I brought along my own pa. That's the first pot I ever saw with a belt around.
83
00:12:10.435 --> 00:12:19.800
Castello, please keep out of this. Kitsil, do you know anything about cooking game? Do I know how to cook game while I'm cooking the finest pineapple you ever tasted?
84
00:12:20.740 --> 00:12:23.240
You, cook pineapple? Sure. Pienacke.
85
00:12:24.180 --> 00:12:24.680
Oh.
86
00:12:26.020 --> 00:12:29.745
Look, Kitzel, I don't wanna get personal, but why don't you pull in your tongue? Nobody ordered cold
87
00:12:30.305 --> 00:12:46.949
cuts. Look. Never mind that, Costello. Kissel, get busy, please, and get the dinner ready. No. No. No. Just a second. Just a second, my little man. Don't get excited. First, I got to open my little bag and get out my chisels and saws. What chisels and saws? Twin chisels and creme de re saw.
88
00:12:48.290 --> 00:12:55.430
You know, kitchen was too bad you didn't bring your monkey wrench. Well, for goodness sake, what would I be doing with a monkey wrench? Well, you could tighten the nuts on a fruitcake.
89
00:13:05.264 --> 00:13:06.565
Stop, Priscilla, please.
90
00:13:07.024 --> 00:13:11.300
Will you get busy and help get to? I'm going into the living room and see if any of my guests have
91
00:13:12.680 --> 00:13:13.180
arrived
92
00:13:14.560 --> 00:13:15.460
yet. Sebastian.
93
00:13:15.840 --> 00:13:16.340
Sebastian.
94
00:13:16.880 --> 00:13:18.820
Shut off that radio. Shut it off.
95
00:13:19.840 --> 00:13:20.980
My old Sebastian.
96
00:13:21.360 --> 00:13:29.465
Well, I just come over to help you out, uncle Butt, and I thought the guest would like some nice romantic music. Romantic music?
Mhmm. Oh, that tiger isn't romantic music.
97
00:13:29.845 --> 00:13:31.385
It is to another tiger.
98
00:13:34.325 --> 00:13:45.180
Alright. Now look, Sebastian. If you're going to hang around here, you'll have to behave yourself. Now this is going to be a very formal Thanksgiving dinner. The men will all wear tails. Tails. Who's coming? Mickey Mouse? No.
99
00:13:45.720 --> 00:13:47.339
Will you please listen, Sebastian?
100
00:13:47.720 --> 00:14:02.985
It will be your job to usher the people into the dining room. I will sit at the head of the table. Ken Niles will sit on my right hand, and Connie Haines will sit on my left hand. Ken Niles is gonna sit on your right hand? That's right. And Connie Haines will sit on your left hand? That's right. How are you gonna eat with your feet? No. No. No. Look.
101
00:14:03.605 --> 00:14:10.940
When you get all the people seated, you go to the kitchen. Then when I ring this little dinner bell, your brother will hand me the carving knife and you give me the bird.
102
00:14:11.399 --> 00:14:12.540
In front of everybody?
103
00:14:14.200 --> 00:14:15.339
That'll do, Sebastian.
104
00:14:15.720 --> 00:14:24.085
I'll go out in the kitchen and, make some ice water, and I do hope you can make ice water. Yeah. Sure. You just peel a onion. An onion? Yeah. That'll make your ice water.
105
00:14:25.585 --> 00:14:31.125
Sebastian, ice water is frozen water. Oh, yeah? Yeah. Then what is frozen ink? I stink.
106
00:14:31.585 --> 00:14:34.140
You don't get no ice even on a meat. Right? What?
107
00:14:43.500 --> 00:14:44.000
This.
108
00:14:44.940 --> 00:14:48.945
Connie Haynes in a current revival of a great song, the sunny side of the street.
109
00:14:52.865 --> 00:14:53.365
Radical
110
00:14:53.825 --> 00:14:55.605
and get your head.
111
00:14:56.385 --> 00:14:57.605
Leave your worry
112
00:14:58.225 --> 00:14:59.125
on the doorstep.
113
00:15:01.265 --> 00:15:02.805
Just direct your feet
114
00:15:03.665 --> 00:15:04.050
to
115
00:16:38.470 --> 00:16:54.420
You have read in the papers how people are smoking so much more and how cigarettes are being shipped to our fighting men overseas in huge quantities. And if your dealer occasionally should say, sorry, sir. We're out of camels today. Don't let that stop you from asking for camels the very next time you're buying cigarettes.
116
00:16:55.139 --> 00:17:01.079
Remember that Camels rich, full flavor, and kind cool mildness make Camels worth asking for again
117
00:17:01.380 --> 00:17:02.360
and again
118
00:17:02.899 --> 00:17:05.960
because war or peace, Camel is still Camel.
119
00:17:06.340 --> 00:17:13.455
And your t zone, that's t for taste and t for throat, will confirm that statement. C a m t l.
120
00:17:13.915 --> 00:17:17.935
Camels. Now as always, the cigarette of costlier tobacco.
121
00:17:25.110 --> 00:17:32.330
And now, ladies and gentlemen, we take you to the home of Bud Abbott where a formal Thanksgiving dinner is about to be served.
122
00:17:32.950 --> 00:17:38.445
Costello has been working in the kitchen all day like a dog, but he is now ready to face the guest.
123
00:17:39.005 --> 00:17:41.345
Let us look in on this dog face.
124
00:17:44.524 --> 00:17:48.784
Costello. Costello. The guests are arriving. Open the door and announce them as they come in.
125
00:17:49.565 --> 00:17:52.144
Mister and missus Zed Blank, mister and missus Phil Krasner.
126
00:17:52.524 --> 00:17:53.264
And now
127
00:17:54.500 --> 00:18:03.960
Hip Squeak, Knight of the Garter, Lord Beaver Board, Knight of the Bath, and Hetty Lamar. Hetty Lamar isn't here. I was thinking of another night.
128
00:18:06.675 --> 00:18:12.215
Young man, how dare you leave me standing here? Kindly get my card and last match. Okay.
129
00:18:12.995 --> 00:18:14.595
Hillside 2183.
130
00:18:14.595 --> 00:18:15.495
Ask for Hazel.
131
00:18:17.075 --> 00:18:19.655
If a man answers, hang up. Wrong pack.
132
00:18:20.190 --> 00:18:20.690
Wrong
133
00:18:21.710 --> 00:18:30.049
fact. That isn't my card. Sorry. I got that mixed up with one of my own. Costello. What's your manners? Okay. This is lady, Jennifer Cookiecutter.
134
00:18:30.990 --> 00:18:31.890
This little
135
00:18:32.350 --> 00:18:35.404
boy, my home, you know, is Glendinning On The Tyne.
136
00:18:35.865 --> 00:18:42.205
Glendinning On The Tyne? Then you must know my great aunt Harriet, the old Gerber's Bullock, did you know? Oh,
137
00:18:42.585 --> 00:18:46.680
from Glendinning On The Tyne? No. From hitchhiking on oil trucks.
138
00:18:54.840 --> 00:19:03.455
Alright. That's enough, Costello. Take, lady Jennifer's coat and I will escort her to the table. Oh, by all means, the table. Oh, I'm so hungry. I could eat a horse.
139
00:19:04.235 --> 00:19:04.975
Yeah. Castello.
140
00:19:05.355 --> 00:19:13.215
Castello, get that horse out of here. Get out of here. Get out of here. Get out of here. And, please please bring lady Jennifer a cocktail. Yes.
141
00:19:13.835 --> 00:19:14.815
Make it a martini,
142
00:19:15.540 --> 00:19:20.200
with a black olive. You drink Martini with a black olive? Yes. I'm in mourning for my husband.
143
00:19:22.500 --> 00:19:30.840
If I was you, Lady Jennifer, I would lay off those Martini. They're pretty hot. Costello, what makes you think they're hot? Of course. I just poured one. When I dropped the olive in, the olive stuck out its pimiento.
144
00:19:34.975 --> 00:19:47.450
Oh, oh, boy, that's great, mister Carton, mister Abbott. I have a little, Thanksgiving present for you. A nice, fat Belgian hair. I raised them, you know. Oh, thank you, lady Jennifer. Castillo, take lady Jennifer's hair.
145
00:19:47.910 --> 00:19:50.570
Take her what? Take her hair and put it in the icebox.
146
00:19:51.669 --> 00:19:54.650
Okay. Have it no. No. No. You're good. Castillo,
147
00:19:55.030 --> 00:19:57.450
now look what you've done. Speak to lady Jennifer.
148
00:19:57.815 --> 00:19:58.715
Hello, Baldy.
149
00:20:06.615 -->
00:20:07.115
Oh.
150
00:20:07.575 --> 00:20:13.515
I've never been doing sausage in all my life. Come lady Jennifer. I'll show you one of the table. I'll show you.
151
00:20:13.960 --> 00:20:17.500
That's a line right, not under that table. Oh, no. I'm sorry, missus Jennifer.
152
00:20:17.800 --> 00:20:22.380
I'll show you to the table. Very well. You may hit my arm. Does that come off too?
153
00:20:24.600 --> 00:20:29.745
Castello get busy and serve the dinner. And remember, I don't want to see your thumb in the soup. Okay.
154
00:20:31.085 --> 00:20:31.825
Lord Beaverbrook.
155
00:20:32.845 --> 00:20:40.290
Ward, pardon me, mister Beaver Ward. It's not quite alright. It's quite alright, please. What bottle of turkey would you like? Well, I'm a flyer. I'll take the wing.
156
00:20:42.850 --> 00:20:47.190
And, pretty rich. Well, I'm a musician. I'll take the dumpstick.
157
00:20:47.730 --> 00:20:53.270
And Sebastian, what part of the turkey would you like? Well, you could skip me. I'm a seven kid.
158
00:20:55.745 --> 00:21:02.325
I hope somebody will remember me. I like the neck. I like the neck too, Connie. I'll meet you out on the front porch.
159
00:21:03.024 --> 00:21:07.200
That's how to keep quiet and serve the soup. And remember, I don't want to see your thumb in it.
160
00:21:22.385 --> 00:21:25.525
No. No. Use the French phone. I don't speak French. Oh, here.
161
00:21:26.225 --> 00:21:35.125
Please. Here. I'll call him. Operator, give me the police. Hurry up. Hello. Police department. This is Bud Abbott's home. There's been a robbery here. Come over at once.
162
00:21:39.110 --> 00:21:42.970
Well, here we are. We're from headquarters. What took you so long? So
163
00:21:44.950 --> 00:21:49.370
long. All the head? What took you so long? So long? What? You're leaving already?
164
00:21:51.750 --> 00:21:57.575
Now shut up, you. You look suspicious. Suspicious. Stick up your hands and reach for the ceiling. Okay. But I know I won't make it, Diane.
165
00:21:58.995 --> 00:22:03.895
Officer, there has been a robbery here. The lights went out, and somebody stole Lady Jennifer's pearl necklace.
166
00:22:06.200 --> 00:22:07.900
I stole a necklace here.
167
00:22:08.360 --> 00:22:10.300
Somebody will get the jug for this.
168
00:22:13.640 --> 00:22:15.100
Sounds like you've had it already.
169
00:22:16.920 --> 00:22:20.885
Come on. Come on. Line up against the wall, and you too, bad boy. What's your name?
170
00:22:21.585 --> 00:22:23.205
Anas Luke Costello.
171
00:22:25.105 --> 00:22:25.605
Costello,
172
00:22:26.865 --> 00:22:28.164
ain't you got a relative,
173
00:22:28.465 --> 00:22:30.005
doing time at Alcatraz?
174
00:22:30.625 --> 00:22:32.720
Yes, sir. That's my uncle
175
00:22:33.100 --> 00:22:33.600
Stebbins.
176
00:22:34.220 --> 00:22:40.080
They put him in for something he didn't do. For something he didn't do? Yeah. He didn't wipe off his fingerprints when he robbed the bank.
177
00:22:42.460 --> 00:22:45.065
Now get
in line there. I'll take this gentleman first.
178
00:22:45.365 --> 00:22:47.304
What's your name? Lord Beevleborg.
179
00:22:48.085 --> 00:22:52.265
Where were you sitting when the necklace was stolen? Well, I You lie. Ouch.
180
00:22:53.445 --> 00:22:57.145
How long have you known lady Jennifer? Well, I You lie. Ouch.
181
00:22:57.605 --> 00:22:59.465
Get rid of him fast, Tony.
182
00:23:00.690 --> 00:23:04.390
Alright, sergeant. Drag this man out of here. Now Castello, you're next.
183
00:23:04.850 --> 00:23:07.190
I think there are others ahead of me.
184
00:23:08.050 --> 00:23:11.670
I'm ready to take you now. But I don't wanna be selfish.
185
00:23:12.050 --> 00:23:13.830
Women and children first.
186
00:23:14.505 --> 00:23:23.245
Sit down there in a chair. Just a minute. Who are you shoving? Who are you shoving? I'm shoving you and what's about it. I just wanted to be sure.
187
00:23:26.265 --> 00:23:30.940
Now where was you when the lights went out? I was You lied. I expected it.
188
00:23:31.400 --> 00:23:31.900
Ouch.
189
00:23:32.920 --> 00:23:33.420
Happy
190
00:23:34.120 --> 00:23:39.740
hapapa. What's the matter? Look, why did he Did you hurt your head? No. But it broke my shoelaces.
191
00:23:41.240 --> 00:23:51.525
Shut up, you. Now I'm going to question the little guy here. Oh, no. Not that. You can't question my little fellow Sebastian. And why not? There's only one head between us. I'm playing both parts.
192
00:23:52.544 --> 00:23:57.780
Oh, doctor. No. Just a moment, officer. There's been a horrible mistake. My phone went stone at the stall.
193
00:23:58.580 --> 00:24:01.000
They slipped off my neck into my tapioca.
194
00:24:01.380 --> 00:24:03.300
Well, leave them there. You look better wearing,
195
00:24:03.780 --> 00:24:04.280
tapioca.
196
00:24:05.380 --> 00:24:09.960
What happened to Costello? But wait wait a minute. There's one thing I can't understand, Costello.
197
00:24:10.340 --> 00:24:12.760
Who turned out the lights when you were serving dinner?
198
00:24:13.265 --> 00:24:15.525
I turned them out on Cobalt. Sebastian.
199
00:24:15.985 --> 00:24:21.365
Why did you turn the lights off? Because you said you didn't wanna see Louis come in the soup.
200
00:24:22.625 --> 00:24:23.125
Sebastian.
201
00:24:23.745 --> 00:24:34.310
Do you realize what you did? You almost got me arrested. Your brother. They might have thrown me in jail. Then I would have to walk around with the power of the prison on my noble brow.
202
00:24:35.090 --> 00:24:38.310
Why did you do such things to your loving brother, Sebastian?
203
00:24:39.410 --> 00:24:39.910
Oh,
204
00:24:40.525 --> 00:24:41.905
I'm my bad
205
00:24:45.405 --> 00:24:45.905
boy.
206
00:24:51.965 --> 00:24:54.120
Evan and Castello will be back in a moment.
207
00:24:57.720 --> 00:25:02.700
Thanks to the Yanks of the Week. Tonight, we salute Lieutenant Thomas a McKenzie of Auburn, Kentucky.
208
00:25:03.320 --> 00:25:04.460
Fighting off unconsciousness
209
00:25:04.760 --> 00:25:12.625
from plaque wounds in his chest, this bombardier hero completed his bomb run without even letting his own crewmates know he was wounded.
210
00:25:13.005 --> 00:25:14.625
In your honor, Lieutenant McKenzie,
211
00:25:15.165 --> 00:25:17.905
the makers of camels are sending to our fighters overseas
212
00:25:18.605 --> 00:25:19.825
400,000
213
00:25:20.045 --> 00:25:21.105
camel cigarettes.
214
00:25:27.640 --> 00:25:32.600
Each of the three camel radio shows honors the yank of the week by sending free 400,000
215
00:25:32.600 --> 00:25:45.005
camel cigarettes overseas. A total of more than a million camels sent free each week. In this country, the camel caravans traveling from camp to camp have thanked audiences of more than 4,000,000 yanks with free shows and free camels.
216
00:25:45.465 --> 00:25:49.404
Camel broadcasts go out to The United States Three times a week. I rebroadcast
217
00:25:49.705 --> 00:25:51.710
to our men overseas and to South America.
218
00:25:52.169 --> 00:26:03.870
Listen tomorrow to Jimmy Durante and Gary Moore. Monday to Bob Hawke in thanks to the yanks. And next Thursday to Abbott and Costello. And now here are by Abbott and Lou Costello with the final word. Well, Costello,
219
00:26:04.409 --> 00:26:30.260
now that we've done our show, let's get home and have our turkey. Yeah? I think it's a good idea because I'm just about ready for it now. Did you make the stuffing? Yeah. I did. I made grand stuff. You did, Yeah. I ground up a lot of bread crumbs, and I put in some garlic. Oh, that's right. Put in a little onions, and I put in some more garlic, then a whole lot of onion Yeah. Then a whole lot of garlic and a whole lot of more onions? Yeah. Then a whole lot of garlic and a whole lot of more onions? Wait a minute. And then a little more Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Did you taste it? Taste it? I couldn't even get near it. Oh,
220
00:26:30.799 --> 00:26:33.059
good night, folks. Good night. Good night, everybody.
221
00:26:48.440 --> 00:26:59.420
Be sure to tune in next week for another great Abbott and Costello Show. And remember, try Camel's on your throat and your taste. See for yourself how Camel's mildness, coolness, and flavor sticks with you.
222
00:27:14.580 --> 00:27:23.960
The Abbott and Costello Show for Campbell cigarettes will be back at this very same time next week. Don't miss it. This is Ken Niles in Hollywood wishing you all a pleasant. Good night.
223
00:28:01.925 --> 00:28:03.545
Wings are here. Oh, from
224
00:28:03.845 --> 00:28:18.690
No. I'd never order from anymore. Papa's now has wings in five flavors. Ghost pepper, roasted garlic Parmesan, sweet and spicy, signature hot, and honey barbecue, marinated in Louisiana spices, hand battered and flipped. Makes no sense. They're $5.99 for six pieces. Taste them.
225
00:28:19.550 --> 00:28:23.810
Crunchy outside. And juicy inside. Consider me a convert.
226
00:28:24.190 --> 00:28:28.515
That's the most romantic thing you've said to me all month. We don't make sense. We make chicken.
227
00:28:30.735 --> 00:28:31.360
Price may vary.