When Nursing Doesn’t Go as Planned: Nurse Mel on Injury, Bullying & Reinventing Your Career의 전체 녹취록

figured out yet. 00:05:27.639 --> 00:05:31.239 But Mel, tell us about your nursing journey. 00:05:31.399 --> 00:05:33.560 Like, especially, you know, once you became a nurse. 00:05:33.639 --> 00:05:38.599 I mean, you can of course give us the back if there was like some pivotal moment as to why you wanted to be a nurse and from there. 00:05:39.000 --> 00:05:42.519 But I know your story is not traditional. 00:05:42.919 --> 00:05:46.279 It doesn't, I don't think it was linear, I don't think it was easy. 00:05:46.599 --> 00:05:47.399 Oh no. 00:05:47.719 --> 00:05:58.680 Oh no, but people need to hear it because I am really saying no one's life after nursing school has really been easy and straightforward and you know no one's life ever is ever perfect. 00:05:59.000 --> 00:06:00.039 Amen to that. 00:06:00.279 --> 00:06:02.919 You know, Taylor Swift has her problems. 00:06:03.239 --> 00:06:04.039 Does she? 00:06:04.279 --> 00:06:06.759 Maybe it's gonna be she has a pri. 00:06:07.079 --> 00:06:10.199 I mean, I know she values her privacy, and so true. 00:06:10.279 --> 00:06:12.359 When are we gonna see those wedding pictures? 00:06:12.919 --> 00:06:13.399 Rude. 00:06:13.639 --> 00:06:18.439 I'm happy that she can keep those close to her heart, just for her and her husband. 00:06:19.159 --> 00:06:20.039 I love that for her. 00:06:20.279 --> 00:06:21.399 Do you like her new music? 00:06:21.479 --> 00:06:23.159 Because I'm obsessed with Patient Zero. 00:06:24.039 --> 00:06:26.439 I am a Swifty through and through. 00:06:26.599 --> 00:06:35.000 That woman has gotten me through what a lot of my circle could not. 00:06:35.319 --> 00:06:37.239 So thank you, Taylor Swift. 00:06:37.479 --> 00:06:39.719 And yes, just yes to all everything that you said. 00:06:39.879 --> 00:06:51.399 My story, my journey has been unconventional, a little out there, and just like there's a lot, you there's a lot of words in the dictionary, right? 00:06:53.399 --> 00:06:56.599 And how do I put a bow on it, you know? 00:06:56.839 --> 00:07:11.560 Uh we're doing the best we can uh with the tools that we got, and nursing school taught us a lot, we know that, but there's so much that they didn't teach us, and I can't wait to discuss more about that. 00:07:13.159 --> 00:07:15.959 So tell me, like, where did you go to nursing school? 00:07:16.279 --> 00:07:22.359 I graduated from high school in 2013 in Green Bay, Wisconsin, GoPacco. 00:07:22.680 --> 00:07:27.479 Okay, and I moved to Milwaukee to study nursing. 00:07:27.719 --> 00:07:33.639 I went to just our local university, UWM, Panther Pride, RAR. 00:07:34.120 --> 00:07:38.519 And it took me five and a half years to like get my bachelor's of science in nursing. 00:07:38.839 --> 00:07:41.959 Why it did, and that's okay. 00:07:42.199 --> 00:07:42.839 It's okay. 00:07:43.239 --> 00:07:44.439 Did you take like a year off? 00:07:44.519 --> 00:07:46.279 Did you have to like repeat a class? 00:07:46.599 --> 00:07:50.599 No, no, I had to work

fucking hard. 00:07:51.079 --> 00:07:52.279 I love to hear it. 00:07:52.359 --> 00:07:55.719 Okay, yeah, nothing good happens quickly or overnight. 00:07:56.439 --> 00:07:58.120 Yes, fact. 00:07:58.519 --> 00:08:10.519 And I'm sorry for the all the people that have a lot of assumptions about Mel and her brain and body and what's happened to her, and what's true, and what's not true, and my truth, and your truth, and whatever. 00:08:10.759 --> 00:08:21.959 Yeah, I don't remember what my point was because window of tolerance is a thing, and um yeah, I I've been through a lot and I've been in therapy a lot. 00:08:22.599 --> 00:08:29.959 I've seen a lot, and I understand suffrage. 00:08:30.759 --> 00:08:35.159 Yeah, I understand rights. 00:08:36.519 --> 00:08:55.639 Nursing school teaches you a lot about like anatomy and autonomy and things, but the world seems to maybe teaching us uh different things based on certain factors, right? 00:08:55.879 --> 00:09:00.519 Like I'm a human being, you're a human being, we're complex human beings. 00:09:00.840 --> 00:09:03.399 And my story is different than yours. 00:09:03.560 --> 00:09:06.039 Where I grew up is different than where you grew up. 00:09:06.519 --> 00:09:11.879 I don't know where you're located, but I know you're an hour ahead of me, so I know you're the time zone that you're in. 00:09:12.200 --> 00:09:41.080 And that's really cool, but it's just my big my biggest goal during pre-during and after nursing school is what can I do to help me, help you, help we, and there's so much to give and gain in this beautiful magical world that we live in, Earth, planet, whatever, plane of existence, we'll call it. 00:09:42.040 --> 00:09:45.879 And there's just so much greed. 00:09:47.000 --> 00:10:05.080 I know, and so much uh grief, and so it's just it can be so much sometimes, and uh, sometimes our brains and bodies don't know how to handle some external factors, yeah. 00:10:05.320 --> 00:10:08.280 And we know this because we know the brain and the body. 00:10:08.519 --> 00:10:10.120 Do you know about the homunculus? 00:10:10.920 --> 00:10:13.879 The the the hum what it's okay. 00:10:14.040 --> 00:10:15.000 Let me educate you. 00:10:15.240 --> 00:10:15.960 Please do. 00:10:16.200 --> 00:10:18.920 The homunculus is a little part in our brain. 00:10:19.000 --> 00:10:20.120 I think it's back here, actually. 00:10:20.200 --> 00:10:22.040 It's it's like it's tucked away. 00:10:22.360 --> 00:10:24.360 It's high little secret compartment. 00:10:24.600 --> 00:10:26.680 It's a secret little drawer, right? 00:10:27.080 --> 00:10:34.200 And in this drawer is if you Google what a homunculus looks like, okay, it's really funny. 00:10:34.519 --> 00:10:39.720 It looks funny, it looks awkward, it looks it feels like the name's fitting. 00:10:39.960 --> 00:10:40.920 The name is fitting. 00:10:41.000 --> 00:10:43.080 I think it's Latin for little man. 00:10:43.400 --> 00:10:51.560 Homunculus means little man, whatever the like

term used to describe words. 00:10:52.200 --> 00:10:57.000 I took that class in college, but I can't remember what that I think you're talking about Latin. 00:10:57.400 --> 00:10:58.840 It is, I think it is Latin too. 00:10:59.080 --> 00:11:04.600 That's whom regardless, it's Latin for little man, and it is our our sensory perceptor. 00:11:05.000 --> 00:11:11.000 So when we feel things or things happen to us, or we feel pain, or we get hurt, yeah. 00:11:11.320 --> 00:11:15.720 That part of our brain, it gets it the signal, it gets back there. 00:11:16.519 --> 00:11:26.759 And then it tells us, tells our brain and our body, and what we're telling ourselves what we need to do next to get to the next point. 00:11:26.920 --> 00:11:29.160 It's like this, it's one of our survival mechanisms. 00:11:29.480 --> 00:11:32.680 Kind of like it, does it like um start fight or flight? 00:11:32.759 --> 00:11:40.200 Or it's it helps with it helps aid in fight and flight for sure, but it's basically like our center for how we talk to ourselves. 00:11:40.519 --> 00:11:40.840 Oh. 00:11:41.240 --> 00:11:46.120 That's where my Mel's negative self-talk, ooh, she hangs out back there. 00:11:46.360 --> 00:11:59.320 And there have been times in my existence where she was really like that part of the brain was like really quiet or dismissed or ignored or not believed or X, Y, and Z. 00:11:59.720 --> 00:12:13.000 And that part of the brain, when it gets hurt or injured, or damaged, or bruised, the wiring that it sends to that part of your sensory is kind of messed up. 00:12:13.160 --> 00:12:23.320 It's not right, it's not how it should be, because that's not how you were born, that's not how your physiology, genealogy, your makeup. 00:12:23.400 --> 00:12:30.840 I don't know what other word you want to put to it, but like it's we're complex, you know? 00:12:31.720 --> 00:12:44.200 So that I've learned in something that I I wrote down and I want to say this to the universe nursing school teaches you a lot, right? 00:12:45.160 --> 00:13:15.080 It taught me anatomy, physiology, chemistry, biology, microbiology, mathematics, fundamentals, health assessment, pathophysiology, pharmacology, that's a fun one, medical, surgical, you know, clinical skills, gotta have those fundamentals, mental health. 00:13:15.240 --> 00:13:16.519 Okay, they touch on it. 00:13:16.680 --> 00:13:18.840 There's probably a chapter in the book. 00:13:19.080 --> 00:13:27.879 I don't know what your nursing school taught you about your community engagements and resources and outreach, but that's a different discussion. 00:13:28.120 --> 00:13:33.560 Obstetrics, gynecology, pediatrics. 00:13:33.639 --> 00:13:35.240 I'm a peas nurse by trade. 00:13:35.400 --> 00:13:37.000 That's my background and specialty. 00:13:37.240 --> 00:13:47.080 I'm a peeds nurse, geriatrics, nutrition, psychology, sociology, thank you. 00:13:47.400 --> 00:13:56.680 Words are hard sometimes, communication, research slash evidence-based practice. 00:13:57.480 --> 00:14:01.240 If I never have to write another EBP paper, I will be so happy. 00:14:01.800 --> 00:14:02.759 Statistics. 00:14:04.600 --> 00:14:06.280 The dreaded statistics. 00:14:08.040 --> 00:14:09.639 Community health. 00:14:09.960 --> 00:14:30.040 I know, epidemiology, leadership, management, ethics depends on who you ask, what your core values and beliefs are, who's running the ethics committee, and technology. 00:14:31.240 --> 00:14:37.240 Sometimes those were some of the subjects that I touched on in nursing school. 00:14:37.960 --> 00:14:47.240 Those were just the two years, the two-year clinical program that I did to get my Bachelor's of Science of Nursing. 00:14:47.480 --> 00:14:54.040 It took me three years to do my prerequisites to apply to my nursing program. 00:14:56.280 --> 00:14:59.960 With my nursing program, we had to write a paper. 00:15:00.440 --> 00:15:05.639 They asked us a question, and we had to write our answer. 00:15:05.800 --> 00:15:10.600 We had to write a paper about whatever the question was. 00:15:11.879 --> 00:15:14.040 And I answered the question. 00:15:14.200 --> 00:15:18.759 I wrote my paper the first time, and I was denied. 00:15:19.240 --> 00:15:20.680 I wasn't waitlisted. 00:15:20.920 --> 00:15:22.840 I got the denial paper. 00:15:23.160 --> 00:15:30.519 I was on spring break in Mexico with my now husband and his, well, my my in-laws. 00:15:30.600 --> 00:15:36.600 We went to Mexico for spring break, and I knew that those letters were going out. 00:15:36.920 --> 00:15:42.840 And I had peers that were applying at this to be in the same cohort. 00:15:43.160 --> 00:15:55.400 And one of my best friends, my oh, my AP partner, my AP lab partner, nothing, in my opinion, bonds you than the smell of formaldehyde and maybe a fetal pig. 00:15:56.840 --> 00:16:00.759 So me and me and her are still very, very, very best friends to this day. 00:16:01.000 --> 00:16:03.720 And she got in the first time that she applied. 00:16:03.960 --> 00:16:04.920 I didn't. 00:16:05.240 --> 00:16:06.840 And she had a better story. 00:16:06.920 --> 00:16:15.480 She wrote a better paper than I did at the time with the question that they asked, because at my nursing school, they changed the question every semester. 00:16:16.680 --> 00:16:24.440 So during that semester that I didn't get in, that's that broke me. 00:16:24.759 --> 00:16:26.920 That must have been my god. 00:16:27.080 --> 00:16:27.320 Yeah. 00:16:27.480 --> 00:16:40.519 And I'm trying like yes, that rejection letter coming home from my vacation and seeing a small envelope. 00:16:41.400 --> 00:16:50.759 Oh, versus the big packet that you get when you're accepted into a program with all the information that you need to succeed to start your first day. 00:16:52.920 --> 00:16:56.519 I know I can't even imagine. 00:16:57.080 --> 00:17:06.920 And that's okay because I met with my nursing school counselor because I was confused and frustrated and a little angry.

00:17:07.240 --> 00:17:13.400 And like the pity patty in me is just like, why not me? 00:17:13.480 --> 00:17:14.920 You know, I'm not sure. 00:17:15.480 --> 00:17:19.319 Like, I want to learn and I want to help. 00:17:20.599 --> 00:17:23.480 I want to be there for somebody on their worst day. 00:17:23.720 --> 00:17:37.799 If they if they need something from me, I want to be able to have something, a tool to help you succeed on and off the floor, you know, because we're all in this together. 00:17:37.960 --> 00:17:39.319 I say that all the time. 00:17:39.879 --> 00:17:52.920 The high school musical, we're coming there once we know that we are we're all stars, and we see that I watched Disney Channel and they taught us that dance. 00:17:53.000 --> 00:17:55.000 So I'm never dance, I know. 00:17:57.000 --> 00:18:01.639 And this world is not built for company like me sometimes. 00:18:01.879 --> 00:18:04.360 So, Mel, how the heck did you like overcome that? 00:18:04.440 --> 00:18:05.960 Because I think soapbox, period. 00:18:06.039 --> 00:18:07.400 What's your next question? 00:18:07.799 --> 00:18:08.920 How did you overcome that? 00:18:09.079 --> 00:18:11.559 Did you apply again the next semester and you're like, I'm doing it again. 00:18:11.640 --> 00:18:12.920 I'm I'm seeing this through. 00:18:13.240 --> 00:18:13.880 Yeah, yeah. 00:18:14.440 --> 00:18:15.640 Why are your counselor helpful? 00:18:15.720 --> 00:18:17.240 Were they like, try again, Mel? 00:18:17.319 --> 00:18:20.360 Or were they just like it is what it is? 00:18:22.120 --> 00:18:22.759 Listen. 00:18:24.039 --> 00:18:25.640 How do I want to say this? 00:18:25.880 --> 00:18:26.519 Hmm. 00:18:27.480 --> 00:18:29.480 I'm here to save myself. 00:18:29.880 --> 00:18:31.799 There's nobody here to save me. 00:18:31.960 --> 00:18:34.120 Nobody caught me when I fell. 00:18:35.160 --> 00:18:40.120 I broke my back doing a patient transfer on a total care kiddo at 3 a.m. 00:18:40.759 --> 00:18:41.559 Oh my gosh. 00:18:41.880 --> 00:18:43.799 And my peers didn't believe me. 00:18:44.039 --> 00:18:48.519 And I have institutional betrayal because of that experience. 00:18:49.160 --> 00:19:02.759 But during the time that I didn't get into the program that I worked so hard leading up to that moment to try, yeah, learn, it was devastating and frustrating and all the things. 00:19:02.840 --> 00:19:07.000 And my nursing school counselor was a gem of a human being. 00:19:07.799 --> 00:19:08.920 A beautiful black woman. 00:19:09.079 --> 00:19:09.640 Love her. 00:19:09.799 --> 00:19:25.000 Can't remember her name at the top of my head at this moment in time, but she was helpful because she understood that, and she gave me the insight that I did appreciate it and that helped me heal and move forward. 00:19:25.240 --> 00:19:25.480 Yeah. 00:19:25.880 --> 00:19:28.440 I don't like to move on, I like to move forward, right? 00:19:28.519 --> 00:19:28.840 Okay. 00:19:29.000 --> 00:19:29.960 I think there's a difference. 00:19:30.200 --> 00:19:31.160 Yeah, there is. 00:19:31.559 --> 00:19:53.480 And in that time, she had explained to me that there was an oversaturation of applicants for that semester because they have more applicants in the fall semester than the spring semester because of graduation dates and when they started and when you're supposed to finish your BSN. 00:19:56.360 --> 00:19:59.720 So she told me that it was oversaturated market, basically. 00:19:59.960 --> 00:20:02.680 And my story, my paper, didn't do well enough. 00:20:02.840 --> 00:20:09.559 It was close, it parred conversation amongst the committee, but it wasn't a good enough story. 00:20:11.240 --> 00:20:12.920 And that's okay. 00:20:13.240 --> 00:20:16.360 Because what do you do when you fail? 00:20:16.600 --> 00:20:17.319 I get up. 00:20:17.480 --> 00:20:22.120 I well, first I cry about it for a minute because tears are healing, okay? 00:20:22.279 --> 00:20:23.079 There's science behind it. 00:20:23.799 --> 00:20:25.400 And cried about it for a minute. 00:20:25.480 --> 00:20:25.640 Yeah. 00:20:25.880 --> 00:20:26.680 A little longer than that. 00:20:26.840 --> 00:20:28.519 Like probably a solid two months. 00:20:28.600 --> 00:20:34.200 Um, because during that time I had to evaluate do I need to take full-time credits? 00:20:34.440 --> 00:20:39.319 Do I need to because leading up like pre-nursing school? 00:20:39.559 --> 00:20:40.200 Yeah. 00:20:40.600 --> 00:20:44.840 I was working like 60 hours a week working. 00:20:45.160 --> 00:20:45.880 My goodness. 00:20:46.200 --> 00:20:47.640 To pay my rent. 00:20:47.960 --> 00:20:48.279 Okay. 00:20:48.759 --> 00:20:59.640 Honestly, like and Mel's student debt, Mel's medical debt, Mel's business debt, uh, my mortgage debt now. 00:21:00.279 --> 00:21:01.240 Add it on. 00:21:02.200 --> 00:21:02.680 I know. 00:21:02.840 --> 00:21:04.120 It's a part of the process, apparently. 00:21:04.200 --> 00:21:05.160 Somebody somebody said it. 00:21:05.319 --> 00:21:10.200 So we're we're doing it and we're doing it as well as we can with the tools and the resources that we have available. 00:21:10.440 --> 00:21:13.000 But sometimes there's not enough resources, right? 00:21:14.200 --> 00:21:14.680 It's true. 00:21:14.920 --> 00:21:15.960 That's something I've learned. 00:21:16.279 --> 00:21:23.640 So during that semester that I didn't get into nursing school, I looked at my transcript. 00:21:23.880 --> 00:21:27.480 I noticed where I could do some improvement. 00:21:27.799 --> 00:21:28.120 Okay. 00:21:28.600 --> 00:21:30.039 In different subjects. 00:21:30.200 --> 00:21:32.120 One of them was microbiology. 00:21:32.360 --> 00:21:37.960 Honestly, I I failed my first microbiology class. 00:21:38.039 --> 00:21:45.799 And like not just failed, but like I flunked, I had to drop out of the class before a certain date because it was going to ruin my transplant. 00:21:47.400 --> 00:21:53.480 And it wasn't because I like didn't work hard enough or study

hard enough. 00:21:53.720 --> 00:21:55.240 I had a bad teacher. 00:21:55.640 --> 00:22:00.759 He was not a good teacher for he was very knowledgeable in microbiology. 00:22:01.000 --> 00:22:04.759 Um definitely was a language barrier, a cultural barrier. 00:22:04.920 --> 00:22:09.880 He was from overseas, helping our university and school out with his knowledge of information on microbiology. 00:22:10.039 --> 00:22:11.640 Yay! I'm sure he was a tenure. 00:22:11.880 --> 00:22:12.440 I don't know. 00:22:12.680 --> 00:22:13.000 Right. 00:22:13.160 --> 00:22:19.720 But he did not help me learn to understand the microbiology as an overarching. 00:22:20.440 --> 00:22:23.079 Like I flunked my first test. 00:22:23.480 --> 00:22:26.920 And I studied, I like snail mail studied nursing school. 00:22:27.000 --> 00:22:29.640 I did I wrote everything down on flashcards. 00:22:30.039 --> 00:22:30.600 Yep. 00:22:30.759 --> 00:22:41.799 Not just like Quizlet, like yes, Quizlet, but like pen to paper, note cards, stacks, like cases for the note cards with the subject titles on each one. 00:22:41.880 --> 00:22:44.680 They're all different colors because that's how my brain works. 00:22:45.000 --> 00:22:46.360 Categories, organization. 00:22:46.440 --> 00:22:46.840 Thank you. 00:22:47.000 --> 00:22:47.720 Which you said. 00:22:47.799 --> 00:22:47.960 Yeah. 00:22:48.279 --> 00:22:49.559 That was a compliment. 00:22:50.440 --> 00:22:51.400 No, I get that. 00:22:51.480 --> 00:22:52.200 I think so. 00:22:52.279 --> 00:22:56.120 Yes, I retook microbiology, but I took it at a different school. 00:22:56.360 --> 00:22:59.799 Oh well, you knew that that teacher wasn't going to be helpful for you. 00:23:00.120 --> 00:23:01.480 You and him didn't click clearly. 00:23:01.720 --> 00:23:04.360 I didn't have the finances to kind of fuck around or find out, you know. 00:23:04.600 --> 00:23:25.480 So I needed to get this done as quickly as possible so I can try to keep going with this life and try to better myself and better my future and and give myself the things that Little Mel couldn't get or have access to or whatever, you know, like there's so I we all have I did that. 00:23:25.640 --> 00:23:30.120 You got a better grade, kind of helped your transcript look a little bit better. 00:23:30.360 --> 00:23:34.920 Yes, you waited for the time to reapply uh to write a new story. 00:23:35.079 --> 00:23:37.880 There's a new question, new question, Lord. 00:23:38.200 --> 00:23:42.440 That must have been a really hard application to fill out because you're like, here we go again. 00:23:43.559 --> 00:23:45.319 Here we go again. 00:23:45.880 --> 00:23:47.960 Oh yeah, yeah. 00:23:48.200 --> 00:23:50.759 And you're rejection's so hard. 00:23:50.840 --> 00:23:54.279 And when you think like when you know, I know I'm supposed to be a nurse. 00:23:54.360 --> 00:23:59.000 I know this is like I this is all I wanted to be, or this was my plan, my grand plan. 00:23:59.400 --> 00:24:01.960 And everyone alongside you seems to be moving forward. 00:24:02.120 --> 00:24:03.640 It's I'm like shaking right now. 00:24:05.160 --> 00:24:06.039 What are plans? 00:24:06.200 --> 00:24:07.240 Who's planning what? 00:24:07.400 --> 00:24:08.680 Like what plan? 00:24:09.559 --> 00:24:10.200 I know. 00:24:10.840 --> 00:24:13.000 Oh no, can I give you a virtual hug? 00:24:13.160 --> 00:24:15.240 I wouldn't hug you right now, but yeah. 00:24:17.960 --> 00:24:19.960 Oh I just feel for you because you know what? 00:24:20.039 --> 00:24:20.840 I hang on. 00:24:20.920 --> 00:24:21.640 Hang on, hang on. 00:24:21.799 --> 00:24:22.840 Oh yes, yes. 00:24:23.000 --> 00:24:24.519 We need to normalize something. 00:24:24.840 --> 00:24:26.600 Oh, what are we normalizing? 00:24:26.840 --> 00:24:35.720 We are normalizing the need that sometimes influencers need plushies for comfort when they are emotionally dysregulated. 00:24:36.840 --> 00:24:38.120 You have a dog too, right? 00:24:38.200 --> 00:24:38.600 I swear to you. 00:24:39.480 --> 00:24:40.680 He's napping on the couch. 00:24:41.079 --> 00:24:42.039 We don't want to disturb him. 00:24:42.279 --> 00:24:45.559 He's on his own journey, and no, I don't want to disturb his peace. 00:24:45.640 --> 00:24:52.840 He's precious and doesn't deserve my thought intrusiveness or whatever it is that we're talking about. 00:24:53.240 --> 00:24:54.440 Okay, so let's see. 00:24:54.600 --> 00:24:55.319 You get in. 00:24:55.559 --> 00:24:56.200 I get it. 00:24:56.440 --> 00:24:58.039 Spoiler alert, because you are a nurse. 00:24:58.120 --> 00:24:59.799 We know you get in at some point, right? 00:25:00.120 --> 00:25:00.759 I say it. 00:25:00.920 --> 00:25:02.759 I see you, I hear you, I understand you. 00:25:02.840 --> 00:25:08.840 And sometimes people laugh at that and think, what is why is she so happy? 00:25:08.920 --> 00:25:09.880 What does she have? 00:25:10.039 --> 00:25:17.559 What one of my peers on my first nursing job that I was so excited and worked so hard for. 00:25:17.720 --> 00:25:17.880 Yeah. 00:25:18.840 --> 00:25:23.240 I worked my whole life to get to that floor, that bedside. 00:25:23.799 --> 00:25:24.279 Yep. 00:25:26.120 --> 00:25:39.640 And I walked in with optimism and a smile and excitement and exuberant every day, every shift, every time I walked in those doors, you know, because you have especially in pediatrics, oh my god, you have to put on a bright face. 00:25:40.120 --> 00:25:41.559 Oh my gosh, yeah. 00:25:43.559 --> 00:25:44.840 It's really exhausting. 00:25:45.400 --> 00:25:45.720 Yeah. 00:25:47.880 --> 00:25:51.400 So okay, I know you did PEDs, and actually that does feel like it fits you. 00:25:51.880 --> 00:25:56.360 I understand child psychology more than well, I don't know. 00:25:56.519 --> 00:25:58.279 It depends who's sitting next to me. 00:25:58.680 --> 00:25:59.720 Yeah, I don't care. 00:25:59.960 --> 00:26:01.480 You know what happens when you assume? 00:26:02.279 --> 00:26:02.680 True.

00:26:02.920 --> 00:26:08.840 And I want to assume you get started in pediatrics. 00:26:09.000 --> 00:26:09.480 Yes. 00:26:10.039 --> 00:26:17.319 And obviously, you have previously shared that you broke your back at three in the morning while transferring a patient. 00:26:17.880 --> 00:26:20.200 How long had you been a nurse before? 00:26:20.279 --> 00:26:24.519 Like how long I graduated nursing school in 2018, in December of 2018. 00:26:24.759 --> 00:26:26.759 I live in the frozen tundra. 00:26:27.160 --> 00:26:27.480 True. 00:26:27.559 --> 00:26:31.400 Um, so my grad pictures were not cute and they were very cold, but that's okay. 00:26:31.640 --> 00:26:33.480 They were still I made them cute. 00:26:33.880 --> 00:26:35.160 Of course you did. 00:26:35.960 --> 00:26:38.440 But you broke your back how far after that? 00:26:38.600 --> 00:26:45.160 Like had you been a nurse for a full year yet, or was this really early on, or even earlier, I should say, because that's still early. 00:26:45.400 --> 00:26:47.160 You want to know, you want to know my truth? 00:26:47.400 --> 00:26:48.039 Yes. 00:26:48.759 --> 00:26:50.840 I had to get crafty. 00:26:51.400 --> 00:26:52.279 It's on brand. 00:26:52.759 --> 00:26:53.240 It is. 00:26:53.400 --> 00:27:10.519 I had to get crafty with my transfer, my admission for my total care chronic 23-year-old patient who could not move and was um like dyskinesic, so is yeah, fractured and had to do like he is he needed a lot of help. 00:27:11.000 --> 00:27:11.240 Yeah. 00:27:11.960 --> 00:27:23.400 And I was the nurse responsible for helping uh him and his mom admit to our system to help them get whatever he needed. 00:27:23.640 --> 00:27:27.480 I think it was like his G tube was uh malfunctioning or something. 00:27:27.799 --> 00:27:40.920 So they were in the ER for like all day already, and the empath in me just wants to keep going, keep growing, whatever, but the system's broken. 00:27:41.240 --> 00:27:42.920 And whatever's going with that. 00:27:43.480 --> 00:27:43.799 Sorry. 00:27:44.279 --> 00:27:45.079 No, it's okay. 00:27:45.240 --> 00:27:50.759 Just that you were you were obviously taking care of him, and you were getting crafty with your transfer. 00:27:51.079 --> 00:27:54.120 Yeah, and the doctors who were admit helping me admit him. 00:27:54.279 --> 00:27:54.600 Yeah. 00:27:54.840 --> 00:28:01.559 Because they come in and they ask their questions, and nursing has their own admission process, as we know. 00:28:02.920 --> 00:28:22.200 And yeah, I heard an audible pop when we transferred him using a fitted sheet because there was no turning system underneath him when he came up from the emergency room, and our tube system was not responding quickly enough to the nursing order that I put into Epic. 00:28:23.400 --> 00:28:23.720 Okay. 00:28:24.600 --> 00:28:34.440 And mom was looking at me like trying to answer my questions because I'm just trying to finish my nursing admissions at three o'clock in the morning, like I said. 00:28:35.319 --> 00:28:36.279 I have 4 a.m. 00:28:36.440 --> 00:28:46.840 vinyls, I have four o'clock checks that I need to get done for all my other patients, finish the charts, do my case management, study like all the things before I have to hand them off and however many hours. 00:28:47.000 --> 00:28:50.920 So I felt an audible pop doing that crafty transfer. 00:28:51.480 --> 00:28:59.160 And uh no, I did not have time to document or do an incident report on my audible pop that I heard. 00:28:59.799 --> 00:29:00.200 Yeah. 00:29:00.440 --> 00:29:03.319 I was like, ooh, that felt weird, you know. 00:29:03.400 --> 00:29:04.600 And I have scoliosis. 00:29:04.680 --> 00:29:10.279 I've been going to see a chiropractor since I was, I don't know, whenever they do that test on you as a youth. 00:29:10.600 --> 00:29:13.880 And two weeks later, I was sore, I was stretching. 00:29:13.960 --> 00:29:16.120 I'm like, I really I hurt my back. 00:29:16.279 --> 00:29:17.880 Kind of tweaked, I kinda tweaked it. 00:29:18.039 --> 00:29:18.200 Yeah. 00:29:19.079 --> 00:29:20.360 It was two weeks like that, right? 00:29:20.600 --> 00:29:25.559 And then a Friday night, home alone with Cody, we were about to watch a movie. 00:29:25.640 --> 00:29:26.759 It was January. 00:29:26.840 --> 00:29:28.120 It was right after New Year. 00:29:28.360 --> 00:29:33.640 And it was a Friday night, and we were excited to have our little cuddle night on the couch with a good movie. 00:29:33.799 --> 00:29:37.160 I bought Blaze Pizza, I picked it up, I brought it home. 00:29:37.319 --> 00:29:38.200 It got cold. 00:29:38.279 --> 00:29:43.000 I wanted to enjoy it, so I tried popping it in the oven for a few minutes. 00:29:43.720 --> 00:29:50.440 And as I popped it in the oven, I herniated L4 to L5 and L5 to S1. 00:29:51.400 --> 00:29:53.079 Oh my gosh. 00:29:55.480 --> 00:30:04.840 And oh, that must have been that is where my heat, my um, that is where my healing journey started. 00:30:06.759 --> 00:30:20.120 And where a lot of my humbling experiences and a lot of my empathy comes from was from my own personal experience of being a patient in the in a broken system. 00:30:21.000 --> 00:30:22.920 Oh Mel, I'm so sorry. 00:30:23.240 --> 00:30:36.200 And I was I was PRN at the time, so I didn't have any benefits coming from my employer because thankfully my husband had better benefits than what that institution was offering me. 00:30:36.279 --> 00:30:40.600 So I was like, yeah, I'll get paid the extra ten dollars an hour because I don't need the benefits. 00:30:41.160 --> 00:30:43.079 Oh my gosh, Mel, I'm so sorry. 00:30:43.559 --> 00:31:05.720 There was so much judgment and not enough curiosity or support, or nobody believed me, and they all thought that I was just at home making t-shirts because I didn't want to come into work because I had already started Mel's crafty corner before I got injured. 00:31:05.960 --> 00:31:11.000 I started my yes, I started they made their own

storyline for you. 00:31:11.079 --> 00:31:25.640 They said Mel would rather be home doing crafts, they made their own assumptions about me and my situation and my past and my experience, and spread vicious, cruel lies around the hospital. 00:31:25.960 --> 00:31:27.640 And this is your coworkers. 00:31:29.079 --> 00:31:31.240 Oh my gosh, Mel, I'm so sorry. 00:31:31.400 --> 00:31:39.319 I have one ex-coworker in particular that I think deserves karma. 00:31:39.480 --> 00:31:41.640 Yes, we'll go with karma. 00:31:42.600 --> 00:31:43.160 Yes. 00:31:43.400 --> 00:31:44.039 You know what? 00:31:44.120 --> 00:31:45.400 I do believe in karma. 00:31:45.559 --> 00:31:48.759 So, Mel, whether he or she has been served their karma already or not. 00:31:49.000 --> 00:31:49.319 I don't know. 00:31:49.559 --> 00:31:51.880 I don't have a lawyer in my back pocket, so I don't, I don't know. 00:31:52.039 --> 00:31:53.480 I haven't been to court. 00:31:53.880 --> 00:31:56.519 Oh my gosh, Mel, I'm so so sorry. 00:31:56.680 --> 00:32:12.519 I think I can understand that because I know thinking back in my nursing career, when someone would call out of work, people would be like, Well, it didn't she mention she was gonna be going to, you know, it's like people can't just accept, I don't know what you know, what's actually going on. 00:32:12.600 --> 00:32:14.920 And they have to come up with I don't know how they were raised. 00:32:15.000 --> 00:32:19.000 I don't know what trauma they've endured, capital or lowercase trauma. 00:32:19.480 --> 00:32:23.720 You know, I I don't know because nobody knows unless you ask. 00:32:24.039 --> 00:32:24.680 I know. 00:32:25.079 --> 00:32:27.559 Or, you know, be curious and not judgmental. 00:32:27.640 --> 00:32:29.880 That's something I've learned a lot in therapy and from Ted Lasso. 00:32:30.039 --> 00:32:31.000 Thank you, Ted. 00:32:32.519 --> 00:32:34.759 Oh, I'm so sorry that you went through that. 00:32:34.840 --> 00:32:37.880 And I can't even imagine and it's I'm still going through it. 00:32:37.960 --> 00:32:40.519 Yeah, the queen, I'll call her queen. 00:32:40.759 --> 00:32:50.840 She's still trying to make my life a living hell, and it already feels like yeah, like even on like nurse.org when I'm trying to talk about Lindsay Clancy. 00:32:52.279 --> 00:32:57.400 No, and then and I have certain I'm under contract, right? 00:32:57.640 --> 00:33:01.559 So I uh and I can only say certain things. 00:33:01.799 --> 00:33:02.920 You can only say certain things. 00:33:03.319 --> 00:33:07.960 She commented on the nurse.org and said, ew, Mel. 00:33:10.039 --> 00:33:18.840 Because I've I've had to block her because of all the evil, evil things that she is and like I love chance, he saved my life more ways than one. 00:33:19.079 --> 00:33:30.279 And there was a picture that I posted on my Instagram stories one day during my recovery, because they also had a lot of assumptions on me getting a dog during my time at home. 00:33:30.600 --> 00:33:35.079 And you don't know unless you ask. 00:33:35.240 --> 00:33:45.079 And as women, yeah, I think that, and I don't know about you, but I was taught to sit still and look pretty and in my Catholic school uniform. 00:33:46.120 --> 00:33:57.559 And I've learned just like two weeks ago that I have choice in my autonomy, or there is choice in autonomy. 00:33:57.720 --> 00:33:59.000 That's the way I want to phrase it. 00:33:59.160 --> 00:34:01.559 There is choice in autonomy. 00:34:02.120 --> 00:34:12.360 I have the choice and the decision to say yes or no to opportunity, to questions, to uh information, right? 00:34:13.559 --> 00:34:36.920 And it's up to us in our brains and our bodies and our experiences to absorb that information as it comes with our Rolodex that's in our brain, and try to do better with the future, without and I'm I'm trying to live this life without like as much synthetic help. 00:34:37.880 --> 00:34:39.639 I'll say that synthetic help. 00:34:39.960 --> 00:34:40.599 Yeah. 00:34:41.880 --> 00:34:42.599 It's hard. 00:34:43.000 --> 00:34:43.480 Really hard. 00:34:43.960 --> 00:34:45.239 When did you hurt your back? 00:34:45.400 --> 00:34:46.440 Like how long ago is that? 00:34:46.920 --> 00:34:48.519 January 2021. 00:34:49.079 --> 00:34:52.360 And I think the person is still after you. 00:34:52.759 --> 00:34:54.840 Yes, and she still works at that facility. 00:34:55.239 --> 00:35:00.599 I have half a mind to email the well, the president and CEO was a woman. 00:35:01.480 --> 00:35:02.759 Not anymore. 00:35:03.799 --> 00:35:05.239 Well, it's it's just crazy to me. 00:35:05.319 --> 00:35:07.639 It's like, move on to this other person, not you. 00:35:07.960 --> 00:35:09.720 It's not moving on, it's moving forward. 00:35:09.880 --> 00:35:15.639 And I know that she went through her own traumas and tribulations during my time on the floor with her. 00:35:16.199 --> 00:35:23.079 And I can't, I well, actually, I have experience with what she went through. 00:35:23.320 --> 00:35:23.639 Okay. 00:35:24.440 --> 00:35:25.800 Not to a T. 00:35:26.519 --> 00:35:27.159 Yeah. 00:35:27.800 --> 00:35:29.720 But I understand. 00:35:32.119 --> 00:36:04.519 So um, God forbid I try to share some joy on the internet of my cute puppy that I just got, and the rainbow's basking on him because I have rainbow catchers in my windows to and I'm just trying to share joy, and then she's telling me that I'm an insensitive, horrible human being because of the term rainbow baby, and I called him a rainbow baby because he was basking on rainbows in rainbows, like that, like why God, like you can't. 00:36:04.840 --> 00:36:11.559 She's taking it out of context, yes, and she doesn't know what she doesn't know about me, she doesn't know what you're going through. 00:36:11.720 --> 00:36:14.519 No, and you're personally or what I've been through. 00:36:14.760 --> 00:36:15.559 What you've been through. 00:36:15.639 --> 00:36:16.360 She doesn't know. 00:36:16.679 -->

00:36:18.920 It's a good reminder that none of us really do know. 00:36:19.079 --> 00:36:37.240 But I think what I've learned in life is that there's always gonna be someone trying to dim your light, someone that is feeling pain and they're angry for whatever reason cannot stand when someone else is trying to spread joy, be happy, or inclusive, or optimistic. 00:36:37.480 --> 00:36:40.760 Yes, inclusivity, yes, trauma-informed care. 00:36:41.000 --> 00:36:42.679 Yes, yes, yes. 00:36:43.000 --> 00:36:47.480 I'm living my life that way because of reasons. 00:36:47.800 --> 00:36:57.559 Yeah, you've been through a lot, and no one should tell you that you haven't been through a lot, and no one should tell you, you know, to stop spreading joy or ooh, Mal. 00:36:58.039 --> 00:36:58.360 No. 00:36:58.760 --> 00:37:04.679 Well, my parents also have a lot of opinions about what I'm choosing to do with my time as well. 00:37:04.840 --> 00:37:07.639 So we're doing the best we can, and that's all we can do. 00:37:07.880 --> 00:37:12.679 You have to be true to yourself, you have to, you have to because otherwise lose yourself. 00:37:12.840 --> 00:37:17.800 You can't lose yourself, or you make everybody else happy, and then you're unhappy, and it's your life. 00:37:18.039 --> 00:37:19.800 Yes, yes, my life. 00:37:20.039 --> 00:37:37.559 And if your heart's racing and you're anxious, or there's a pit in your stomach, or you start to get emotionally dysregulated, or too much, or whatever verb you want to use, as long as you can sleep at night, and like how do you sleep? 00:37:37.800 --> 00:37:39.480 How did you sleep last night, Caroline? 00:37:39.559 --> 00:37:42.119 I'm genuinely I actually sleep great. 00:37:42.280 --> 00:37:43.639 Oh, I sleep great. 00:37:44.840 --> 00:37:48.760 Let me tell you I don't I haven't I haven't always slept good. 00:37:48.920 --> 00:37:49.240 Okay. 00:37:49.880 --> 00:37:54.599 I think I'm at a point in my life where I have done what is true to me. 00:37:55.000 --> 00:38:04.039 And I can res a lot of this resonates with me because you know, when I initially quit the job as a nurse manager, and that was what I got my master's for, and that's what I wanted. 00:38:04.280 --> 00:38:09.720 When I finally quit it, I had family that was like, well, wait, didn't isn't that what you wanted to be? 00:38:09.800 --> 00:38:11.000 And now what are you gonna do? 00:38:11.159 --> 00:38:15.720 And you know, and I had to kind of convince my husband, like, look, that job was not right for me. 00:38:15.880 --> 00:38:18.599 And it was so hard to go to the grain. 00:38:18.760 --> 00:38:19.480 It was so hard. 00:38:19.639 --> 00:38:22.440 And I would have sleepless nights and I'd be anxious over it and this and that. 00:38:22.599 --> 00:38:35.320 And finally, I've gotten to a point where I can say, not that I don't care what they think, because of course I love family, but like I really only care about what I feel like is truly aligned for me. 00:38:36.119 --> 00:38:38.199 That's the one I'm gonna be the best version of me. 00:38:38.360 --> 00:38:45.720 I'll be able to show up the best as a mom, the best as a nurse, the best as a wife, because I'm being honest and true to my core values. 00:38:45.880 --> 00:38:47.480 Yes, like, right? 00:38:47.559 --> 00:38:48.840 It's not life's not all about money. 00:38:49.000 --> 00:38:50.519 Life's not all about it's not rocket science. 00:38:50.599 --> 00:38:51.559 And no, it's not. 00:38:51.720 --> 00:38:53.159 No, oh my God. 00:38:53.960 --> 00:38:57.079 In influencer culture, I want to like just another share it out loud. 00:38:57.159 --> 00:38:59.240 I don't know where they're getting their bag. 00:39:00.039 --> 00:39:05.400 But like up here in Wisconsin, it's it's a different, weirder market ball game. 00:39:05.480 --> 00:39:09.079 And like there's there's room for everyone at the table, right? 00:39:09.159 --> 00:39:16.039 Like there's room for everyone at the table, and like there's so much resources being thrown away. 00:39:16.360 --> 00:39:17.000 Food. 00:39:17.159 --> 00:39:22.360 Oh my god, food insecurity, house insecurity, um, gas prices these days. 00:39:22.519 --> 00:39:25.559 I've had so I've had friends that I like. 00:39:28.280 --> 00:39:32.440 I know there's a lot, there's a lot of external chaos too. 00:39:32.519 --> 00:39:34.599 And I think there's a lot of uncertainty in the argument. 00:39:34.920 --> 00:39:40.840 So much uncertainty, and so much that you don't know what to believe, and so much gaslighting. 00:39:41.000 --> 00:39:47.159 Um you have to literally decide what you're allowing your body to take in, right? 00:39:47.320 --> 00:39:49.960 Like I have had to limit myself, Mel, on social media. 00:39:50.199 --> 00:39:51.240 I don't watch the news. 00:39:51.400 --> 00:39:56.760 There's certain things that I know trigger me and make me make me spiral. 00:39:56.920 --> 00:39:57.240 Yes. 00:39:57.400 --> 00:40:02.199 And I know, I know this is a terrible saying, but I don't really feel like I can make a difference in it. 00:40:02.280 --> 00:40:05.559 Like I hate to say that, at least on a grand scheme of things. 00:40:05.639 --> 00:40:11.000 Like, I'm not gonna be a political person ever, like running for right. 00:40:11.320 --> 00:40:20.199 But I know I can be true to me, do good in the world day to day, and focus on those little interactions that I have, you know what I mean, at the granular level. 00:40:20.440 --> 00:40:23.079 Yes, yes, that's what I can do. 00:40:23.400 --> 00:40:25.000 Period, point blank. 00:40:25.240 --> 00:40:27.800 Do we need to turn the page and see what's next? 00:40:27.880 --> 00:40:29.480 Or like what's the next chapter about? 00:40:29.559 --> 00:40:33.559 I don't know because we're it's October 2nd, 2026. 00:40:35.480 --> 00:40:37.079 And there's a lot of uncertainty. 00:40:37.559 --> 00:40:38.599 A lot of uncertainty. 00:40:38.840 --> 00:40:45.079 Have you, especially in the nursing world

and me being affiliated very, very, very closely with nurse.org. 00:40:45.240 --> 00:40:45.639 Yep. 00:40:46.519 --> 00:41:03.079 I have to know what's happening so that I can best share information, valuable information that somebody might be able to utilize a resource from an article or a video or an experience or what have you. 00:41:03.400 --> 00:41:06.199 And it's just silly. 00:41:06.440 --> 00:41:08.440 Corporate America today. 00:41:09.159 --> 00:41:13.559 The the the white man, the Zuckerberg of it all. 00:41:13.800 --> 00:41:16.440 I remember before Twitter was even a thing. 00:41:16.760 --> 00:41:20.599 Yeah, I know, snail mail, I think babies. 00:41:21.079 --> 00:41:26.760 To me, it's like it's gotten to a point where healthcare is so business focused that we have just lost the plot. 00:41:27.000 --> 00:41:29.159 And it's so about the money and the numbers. 00:41:29.240 --> 00:41:32.760 It is all about money people, money, numbers, and productivity. 00:41:32.840 --> 00:41:36.440 It is not about the people providing care or the people getting care. 00:41:37.079 --> 00:41:37.800 Human beings. 00:41:37.960 --> 00:41:38.599 Oh my God. 00:41:38.840 --> 00:41:39.800 Human beings. 00:41:40.199 --> 00:41:41.320 Human beings. 00:41:41.720 --> 00:41:43.800 I know it's really new. 00:41:44.519 --> 00:41:49.159 It's really here's my opinion. 00:41:49.320 --> 00:41:53.240 Yeah, I think that our future can go one of two ways. 00:41:55.559 --> 00:42:07.720 Depending on who and what and where, and money backing and whose pocket is whatever, I don't know. 00:42:08.360 --> 00:42:14.119 It can go really bad, like permanent extinction bad. 00:42:14.440 --> 00:42:15.000 Yeah. 00:42:15.320 --> 00:42:19.960 Or it could go really cool, I think. 00:42:20.280 --> 00:42:27.079 Like it could be the Joneses, like Futurama or like that type of vibe. 00:42:27.240 --> 00:42:27.720 I don't know. 00:42:27.880 --> 00:42:33.240 Like the Simpsons predict the future. 00:42:33.320 --> 00:42:34.679 I don't know how how they get there. 00:42:35.320 --> 00:42:43.240 We saw like a reel on that, and I was like, oh my god, holy I don't know who the creator of the Simpsons is or where they get their information from or who's in their pocket. 00:42:43.320 --> 00:42:49.800 I but it's true of assumptions, but I don't want to say because you know what happens when you assume. 00:42:50.119 --> 00:42:52.840 Don't want to assume, that's for sure. 00:42:53.480 --> 00:42:54.679 Oh my goodness. 00:42:54.840 --> 00:43:00.679 Well, I Mel, I do feel like you are so real and authentically you and sharing when you're trying my best. 00:43:00.920 --> 00:43:06.199 You share a lot about mental health, and that's so important, especially in nursing, because it is so hard. 00:43:06.360 --> 00:43:46.039 And it's so funny that you bring up, I shouldn't say funny, that's not the right word, but it's so it's important, yes, that you bring up even bullying because I've had so many guests on my show, and

part of their journey is someone that bullied them, and it's really sad because it's usually another nurse, yeah, and someone that you know, in a lot of cases is a leader or a boss, or someone that's like supposed to be a friend, or a parent, or a guardian, or a guardian, you know, it's true, and it's clear that it has affected these people that I've had on my show to a core level, and it's not something they can just write off. 00:43:46.119 --> 00:43:51.880 It is something that has stuck with them, it changed the trajectory of their life, the direction of their life. 00:43:52.039 --> 00:44:02.599 Yeah, and it's just so upsetting to know that like that's out there, and especially in our profession and at the bedside when we're just trying to deliver care. 00:44:02.920 --> 00:44:03.320 Yes. 00:44:03.480 --> 00:44:05.159 Like I was born for the bedside. 00:44:05.320 --> 00:44:05.639 Yeah. 00:44:05.800 --> 00:44:06.440 Oh my god. 00:44:06.599 --> 00:44:09.720 I would have loved to retire as a pediatric bedside nurse. 00:44:10.119 --> 00:44:11.159 That would have been so cool. 00:44:11.320 --> 00:44:21.000 I had three Daisy nominations under my belt before I got injured, and I was off the floor for six months in recovery and PT, OT. 00:44:21.240 --> 00:44:23.800 My injury wasn't bad enough to need surgery. 00:44:23.960 --> 00:44:26.199 Okay, to need a spinal fusion. 00:44:27.320 --> 00:44:31.159 It was bad enough to need six months off the floor. 00:44:31.400 --> 00:44:35.720 PT, OT, to like even do my laundry occupational therapy. 00:44:35.880 --> 00:44:48.360 Like my husband had to help bathe me, shower me, pull my pants up after I peed because I lost bladder control because of where that injury is and the nerves and the electrons. 00:44:48.519 --> 00:44:50.119 Like, we know things. 00:44:50.360 --> 00:44:50.760 Right. 00:44:51.000 --> 00:44:52.760 You know, do you understand genealogy? 00:44:53.159 --> 00:44:54.440 And I'm just curious. 00:44:55.240 --> 00:44:59.720 I mean, is that just like, you know, hereditary, you know, things? 00:45:01.000 --> 00:45:13.559 What happened to me is because of what happened to mom, is because what happened to grandma is because what happened to grandma's grandma, and like grandma's grandma lived in whatever, maybe like the 1800s at that time. 00:45:13.800 --> 00:45:22.119 But look at them, you know, I'm Irish, so my ancestors had the potato famine, right? 00:45:22.280 --> 00:45:28.039 So I feel like there are things that like we are at risk for the plague, yes. 00:45:28.199 --> 00:45:31.960 I mean, so is that kind of what you mean with with like genealogy? 00:45:32.199 --> 00:45:42.039 Yes, yes, like my one of my trauma therapists, actually, one of my homework assignments was to try and make my own genealogy map. 00:45:42.440 --> 00:45:43.480 Oh, interesting. 00:45:43.720 --> 00:45:52.119 To try to understand the trauma aspect because somebody thought it was a good idea to diagnose me with CPTSD. 00:45:52.599 -->

00:45:56.679 Okay, complex post-traumatic stress disorder. 00:45:57.000 --> 00:46:00.360 It was just PTSD for a minute, but then they were like, you know what? 00:46:00.599 --> 00:46:02.920 We need to put a little C in front of that. 00:46:03.240 --> 00:46:06.199 Um, we need to add a little bit more sprinkle to that, to that. 00:46:06.519 --> 00:46:09.079 Yeah, a little bit more juz. 00:46:10.519 --> 00:46:11.639 That's a great word. 00:46:11.800 --> 00:46:22.360 And even like, yes, it's funny, like culture, and like I my dad did like the well, there's all the DNA now things, but like he did that family tree. 00:46:22.599 --> 00:46:27.480 I spit into a tube, and we all looked at our genetics. 00:46:27.639 --> 00:46:40.840 Like me and my brother, who are Irish twins, we are completely different in like he is mostly English. 00:46:41.079 --> 00:46:45.720 Like my maiden name is very English. 00:46:45.880 --> 00:46:49.400 Apparently, there's a castle with my maiden name on it. 00:46:49.639 --> 00:46:53.880 I don't know where any of that fortune or fame comes from. 00:46:54.280 --> 00:47:04.280 I don't know or see it, but um, it's it's there somewhere in England, and he has the majority of his makeup is English. 00:47:04.519 --> 00:47:06.280 Oh, that's so interesting. 00:47:06.599 --> 00:47:07.000 Uh-huh. 00:47:07.639 --> 00:47:16.599 And my younger sister, yeah, who's seven years younger than me, okay, is maj mostly German. 00:47:18.280 --> 00:47:18.920 What? 00:47:20.199 --> 00:47:21.240 Are you mostly Irish? 00:47:21.480 --> 00:47:23.159 Oh, I have a lot mixed and male. 00:47:23.240 --> 00:47:26.119 My mom has a touch of Scandinavian Jew in her. 00:47:26.360 --> 00:47:30.519 So yeah, like there's that is so interesting. 00:47:30.760 --> 00:47:31.480 Because I don't know. 00:47:31.559 --> 00:47:33.960 I guess I would have assumed you'd all be similar. 00:47:34.119 --> 00:47:37.400 You know, maybe not exactly the same, but to be okay, you're mature, you know. 00:47:37.720 --> 00:47:42.360 Well, and I was even talking to my husband about this last night, frustrated about the man. 00:47:42.760 --> 00:47:49.639 Generational wealth, oh um, if it's not done correctly with the pot the right positive influence, because that's something I've learned. 00:47:49.720 --> 00:47:56.519 One of my nursing coaches told me when I felt icky about somebody calling me an influencer. 00:47:57.639 --> 00:48:00.119 I was like, oh no, please, like, don't introduce me like that. 00:48:00.199 --> 00:48:01.159 She's like, Yeah, here's Mel. 00:48:01.240 --> 00:48:02.199 She's an influencer for this event. 00:48:02.280 --> 00:48:03.639 I'm like, uh no, I'm just Mel. 00:48:04.519 --> 00:48:04.760 Me? 00:48:05.240 --> 00:48:05.480 Me? 00:48:05.720 --> 00:48:06.599 I'm just Mel. 00:48:06.679 --> 00:48:08.920 I'm just I mean, I'm thank you for inviting me. 00:48:09.079 --> 00:48:09.400 Hi. 00:48:10.039 --> 00:48:14.280 Um, I think television wealth is a little tricky because it's so

tricky. 00:48:14.360 --> 00:48:17.800 Yeah, like daddy helping you out or saving you. 00:48:18.119 --> 00:48:20.039 That's oh my god. 00:48:20.119 --> 00:48:31.000 And like my dad would um walk the heavens and earth for me, but like doesn't have his checkbook out every time that I have a problem or I call him upset. 00:48:31.079 --> 00:48:38.440 And I've had to learn that because of my experience that I had to figure it out on my own. 00:48:38.679 --> 00:48:39.720 I had to figure it out too. 00:48:39.800 --> 00:48:45.159 I guess my parents dropped me off at school and then they moved 15 hours away from me. 00:48:45.400 --> 00:48:48.760 Yeah, they were like, bye, we'll see you at break. 00:48:49.079 --> 00:48:52.199 But not even because airline my like gas prices. 00:48:52.360 --> 00:49:09.800 My mother-in-law took me in in the summer and gave me a job and made me a little room in the basement with my own little bathroom in vanity, and I had my own space because Cody and I weren't married yet, so didn't want us sleeping in the same yeah, of course. 00:49:09.960 --> 00:49:11.800 I get that behind a closed door. 00:49:12.199 --> 00:49:15.000 I get that too, but I've been with that man since I was 13 years old. 00:49:15.159 --> 00:49:15.320 I know. 00:49:15.960 --> 00:49:19.240 You know, we've already, you know, things have already been shared and done. 00:49:19.320 --> 00:49:22.599 So curiosity has got the cat already. 00:49:22.760 --> 00:49:23.400 All right. 00:49:24.920 --> 00:49:25.400 I know. 00:49:25.559 --> 00:49:33.320 I do feel like, you know, thinking about how I want to raise my kids, I want my kids to understand what it's like to work hard for something. 00:49:33.480 --> 00:49:35.480 Yeah, this is the value of a dollar. 00:49:35.720 --> 00:49:37.000 Yeah, exactly. 00:49:37.159 --> 00:49:41.000 It is not just, oh, I'll just get a new one and mom will buy it for me. 00:49:41.240 --> 00:49:46.039 No, you had you had that or whatever it was, a toy, you lost it at the park, it's gone. 00:49:46.360 --> 00:49:47.960 Yes, yes, yes. 00:49:48.199 --> 00:49:48.840 Oh my god. 00:49:49.000 --> 00:49:54.199 I'm sitting with my iPhone 13 because I can't afford the newest iPhone. 00:49:54.280 --> 00:50:02.599 Well, I I can, I can, I can put it on my credit card, but I don't want to expose how bad some of my credit cards are. 00:50:02.920 --> 00:50:21.000 So no, like I said, like we we all do what we can, and I think like you said it best, at the end of the day, when you're trying to go to sleep and whatever work, whatever you gotta do to sleep well at night, you know, it's true, you have to protect your peace so much. 00:50:21.960 --> 00:50:24.599 Yes, yes, does not teach you that. 00:50:24.760 --> 00:50:27.559 No, my my therapist had to teach me that. 00:50:27.800 --> 00:50:31.159 I know, and nursing school didn't teach you how to delegate tasks. 00:50:31.320 --> 00:50:36.440 No, they told you um whose responsibility it was supposed to be to white. 00:50:37.639 --> 00:50:42.760 To delegate, yeah, and how when my when my coworker is rolling their eyes at me, how do I delegate? 00:50:43.000 --> 00:50:50.760 And I worked in pediatrics, so imagine that carelessness when there's an innocent child, right? 00:50:51.159 --> 00:50:52.039 Helpless. 00:50:52.360 --> 00:51:11.159 Oh my god, I no, I can't even if we want if we want to know more about Mel, we can have a different conversation about what I did in nursing school to prepare me for my first day on the floor as a bedside pediatric nurse in acute care, specializing in GIGU, endocrinology, pulmonology, like all the things. 00:51:11.320 --> 00:51:12.760 Yeah, a different conversation. 00:51:13.079 --> 00:51:16.119 I just want to know before we jump off, like two things. 00:51:16.280 --> 00:51:16.599 Yeah. 00:51:16.920 --> 00:51:18.760 How did you get into Mel's Crafty Corner? 00:51:19.000 --> 00:51:25.639 Have you always loved crafts and you just kind of like were like, let me like lean into nursing and crafting at the same time and see where it goes? 00:51:25.880 --> 00:51:31.240 Uh no, it was a creative outlet that it was a hobby turned into a happy accident. 00:51:31.800 --> 00:51:33.000 What was like the initial hobby? 00:51:33.079 --> 00:51:35.079 Like, where were you like known for your crocheting? 00:51:35.159 --> 00:51:35.639 Like, you know what I mean? 00:51:35.720 --> 00:51:57.960 Like no, because I was PRN and I work nights, not I in the COVID world in the pediatric world, in my experience, was weird and different than the my peers next door that were in the adult ICUs, or in the adult world, or in the geriatric world, or I had a different experience. 00:51:58.039 --> 00:52:06.119 I had a weird, different experience, and I got canceled for shifts for 18 weeks. 00:52:06.440 --> 00:52:07.240 Crazy. 00:52:07.559 --> 00:52:15.400 18 weeks where you go without pay because you probably use all of what's in your bank if you had any, but you were PRN, and I did it. 00:52:15.800 --> 00:52:27.320 They had COVID pay for like six months before I don't know where the funding went or where it went to, but it stopped going to the essential worker clocking in. 00:52:27.480 --> 00:52:37.400 Like there was times like I was so strappy for hours that I would volunteer as tribute to screen employees before coming into the building for COVID. 00:52:37.639 --> 00:52:42.920 Yeah, I would take their temperature and like in call centers, like I was there too. 00:52:43.079 --> 00:52:49.880 And especially for the families that because like on my unit, we dealt with a lot of chronic kiddos. 00:52:50.119 --> 00:52:50.280 Yeah. 00:52:50.760 --> 00:52:53.400 Frequent flyers, however you want to call it. 00:52:54.039 --> 00:53:11.960 And because schools were canceled, and a lot of our chronic kids were like going to specialty facilities during the day, care at home, because they're complex kids, they have a lot of tubes, you know, a lot of lines, and um sometimes

limited access to certain things. 00:53:12.280 --> 00:53:23.880 So it's just really important, I think, to be kind to everyone, be kind to self. 00:53:24.360 --> 00:53:31.960 That's where a big well, I'm not wearing it today, but my be kind to your mind design is where I drew on my iPad. 00:53:32.440 --> 00:53:49.960 So yeah, were you just like doodling like during this COVID time where you're being called off left and right, and you're like, Yeah, and like coloring books and like DIY projects that I saved on Pinterest, that I wanted to make this cute sign for my apartment that said home on it, whatever. 00:53:50.199 --> 00:53:52.440 It was it was 2019, you know. 00:53:52.760 --> 00:53:54.440 When did it become a business? 00:53:54.760 --> 00:53:56.519 Were people like, I want to buy that from you? 00:53:56.840 --> 00:54:00.679 Yeah, like it honestly started with me needing a creative outlet, yeah. 00:54:00.840 --> 00:54:05.240 Um, being bored at home, yeah, because work didn't need me. 00:54:05.880 --> 00:54:13.240 I slept all day, I slept all day getting ready to walk in for 12 hours overnight. 00:54:13.480 --> 00:54:14.039 Oh my god. 00:54:14.519 --> 00:54:19.800 So I had a lot of time on my hands, and uh Animal Crossing was crossed. 00:54:20.039 --> 00:54:24.039 Um, you know, I I did I did what I needed to do. 00:54:24.280 --> 00:54:28.679 I just got well, actually, I was planning a wedding. 00:54:28.920 --> 00:54:33.720 So my gosh, you had a lot going on, but not a lot at the same time because you were getting the answer. 00:54:34.599 --> 00:54:45.159 So I had I had a cricket that I bought for myself for my wedding, so that I could DIY my wedding signs because Etsy was expensive. 00:54:46.199 --> 00:54:46.679 Mm-hmm. 00:54:47.079 --> 00:54:50.119 And you're clearly crafty and creative, and I'm crafty, yes. 00:54:50.599 --> 00:54:53.880 So, like my grandmother is an artist, my dad is an artist. 00:54:54.119 --> 00:54:55.880 Oh, also colorblind. 00:54:56.039 --> 00:54:56.519 Fun fact. 00:54:56.760 --> 00:54:58.039 Oh, that's so interesting. 00:54:58.280 --> 00:55:00.280 Um, yeah, I have to help him see colors. 00:55:00.360 --> 00:55:01.079 It's really funny. 00:55:01.240 --> 00:55:03.559 But I have kind of where that genealogy, I think. 00:55:03.639 --> 00:55:07.320 Like it's interesting how you can have those artists in your like bloodline. 00:55:07.559 --> 00:55:08.760 Like artists. 00:55:09.079 --> 00:55:15.320 I bought him those like color, like they they make special glasses now for people who are colorblind. 00:55:15.559 --> 00:55:17.720 Oh, that's so awesome! I didn't know that. 00:55:17.960 --> 00:55:19.880 So my dad has like the red, green. 00:55:19.960 --> 00:55:23.720 I forget the term of what, but he that's his colorblindness. 00:55:23.960 --> 00:55:26.679 So he's doing a painting for me right now. 00:55:26.920 --> 00:55:29.400 Bless his heart of our first home. 00:55:29.559 --> 00:55:30.760 Love that for us. 00:55:30.920 --> 00:55:33.320 That's our Christmas present from my father. 00:55:33.559 --> 00:55:34.519 I love that. 00:55:34.760 --> 00:55:45.480 And my mom is helping him with the colors of my house, and he's picking up the color of what cerulean blue is supposed to look like, and how long that tube has been sitting there and how much it oxidized. 00:55:45.559 --> 00:55:50.199 And my mom said, Hun, why are you putting lime green on Mel's house? 00:55:50.440 --> 00:55:54.360 No, exactly, yeah, yeah, right? 00:55:54.840 --> 00:55:56.440 Kind of crazy, kind of funny. 00:55:56.760 --> 00:56:05.400 But if somebody just handed you a lime green painting of your home, you'd be like, Yinks, I can't wait to hang it up. 00:56:05.559 --> 00:56:07.320 Oh my god, it's so pretty. 00:56:07.559 --> 00:56:09.880 Yeah, that is kind of funny. 00:56:10.119 --> 00:56:15.639 Yeah, so like I I have my iPad, this is my procreate on my app, and I I doodle and like I do different designs. 00:56:15.800 --> 00:56:23.480 Like I did a bachelorette party for a girl that used to watch chants for me while I was working, and it's groomed. 00:56:23.720 --> 00:56:24.840 Oh my gosh, I love that. 00:56:25.240 --> 00:56:26.679 Oh, that's so cute. 00:56:26.920 --> 00:56:29.240 Oh my gosh, you are definitely very creative. 00:56:29.559 --> 00:56:42.280 It's cute, see, and it's all like Milwaukee stuff, but I wanted to show you specifically this is a good one because I love anatomy, and I love flowers. 00:56:42.599 --> 00:56:43.880 Oh love. 00:56:44.280 --> 00:56:44.840 Who doesn't? 00:56:44.920 --> 00:56:48.760 So here's a great example of what oh low bag five percent. 00:56:48.920 --> 00:56:51.880 Jesus aren't we all at five percent? 00:56:52.920 --> 00:56:54.679 Oh my gosh, I love that. 00:56:55.159 --> 00:56:55.639 Thank you. 00:56:55.800 --> 00:56:59.720 So I I feel like neurology nurses would love that too. 00:56:59.880 --> 00:57:03.159 I know these things during my injury. 00:57:03.320 --> 00:57:05.639 I don't know what the date is on this exact one. 00:57:05.880 --> 00:57:12.840 Oh but I yeah, and I have heart like lungs and inhale, exhale. 00:57:13.000 --> 00:57:20.760 Like I work with a lot of nonprofit organizations that are beautiful and run by nurses and like doing collaborations with them. 00:57:20.920 --> 00:57:24.599 Um, so like there's one that we did where it was like box breathing. 00:57:24.920 --> 00:57:27.079 Oh, cute was on your shirt. 00:57:27.240 --> 00:57:31.960 So if you ever felt anxious, you could just oh, I like that. 00:57:32.119 --> 00:57:33.400 What a good idea! 00:57:33.639 --> 00:57:34.840 Yeah, thank you. 00:57:35.079 --> 00:57:35.720 Brilliant. 00:57:36.039 --> 00:57:36.519 Thank you. 00:57:36.760 --> 00:57:43.559 I think there's a lot of ideas and that always that I just need the right investment. 00:57:44.039 --> 00:57:48.440 I know, Mel, I'm so grateful that you took the time to be on the show. 00:57:48.599 --> 00:57:50.760 I really anytime, Caroline. 00:57:50.840

--> 00:57:51.159 Seriously. 00:57:51.240 --> 00:57:52.119 And I gave you my phone number. 00:57:52.199 --> 00:57:53.320 So you I know you did. 00:57:53.400 --> 00:57:54.199 I'll text you now. 00:57:54.519 --> 00:57:55.720 And you call me Mel. 00:57:55.960 --> 00:57:57.960 Yeah, good. 00:57:58.440 --> 00:58:02.519 Wait, tell everyone where they can find you if they don't know where you are. 00:58:03.480 --> 00:58:04.039 Uh all right. 00:58:04.440 --> 00:58:06.679 Are you on are you only on Instagram? 00:58:06.920 --> 00:58:07.559 No, no. 00:58:09.320 --> 00:58:10.679 Hi, my name is Mel. 00:58:10.760 --> 00:58:11.559 I live in Wisconsin. 00:58:11.880 --> 00:58:12.679 Go pack up. 00:58:13.159 --> 00:58:20.760 And you can find me on Instagram, TikTok, Facebook at Mel.crafty.corner. 00:58:21.000 --> 00:58:26.360 You can shop Mel'Crafty Corner.com or Mel's Crafty Corner.com. 00:58:26.599 --> 00:58:30.519 Or you can Google me, Mel's Crafty Corner, or Mel Van Sistine. 00:58:30.920 --> 00:58:33.320 And she has so much good stuff. 00:58:33.960 --> 00:58:38.199 Information will come up and resources will hopefully be able to get to you. 00:58:38.440 --> 00:58:47.720 And my biggest goal with my platform to put a bow in it in a sentence is to help you look and feel your best on and off the floor. 00:58:48.360 --> 00:58:51.559 However, that looks like for you, amazing. 00:58:51.960 --> 00:58:53.480 I'm gonna ask you a big question. 00:58:53.800 --> 00:58:54.840 I'm gonna give you an answer. 00:58:55.320 --> 00:58:55.639 Love it. 00:58:55.880 --> 00:59:01.559 If you could go back to new grad nurse Mel, what would you tell her? 00:59:03.240 --> 00:59:04.599 I know it's kind of a loaded question. 00:59:04.840 --> 00:59:07.079 We cover all no, it's a beautiful question. 00:59:07.159 --> 00:59:07.800 I'm just thinking. 00:59:07.960 --> 00:59:11.159 What I would tell new grad nurse Mel. 00:59:13.880 --> 00:59:15.639 It's all gonna be okay, babe. 00:59:16.599 --> 00:59:17.159 Right? 00:59:17.639 --> 00:59:20.119 And you have all the tools that you need to succeed. 00:59:21.400 --> 00:59:35.639 And sometimes in life, your tool belt might come a little loose, or your hammer might fall out, or your screwdriver gets broken, and you might have to do a little bit of you might have to do more repair. 00:59:36.760 --> 00:59:37.800 And that's okay. 00:59:38.119 --> 00:59:44.440 It's a beautiful thing, and you're going to want to get the help that you deserve. 00:59:45.639 --> 00:59:46.280 Period. 00:59:47.240 --> 00:59:48.199 I love that. 00:59:48.519 --> 00:59:50.119 Mal, thank you so much for today. 00:59:50.280 --> 00:59:55.400 Your resilience, your positivity, your willingness to keep moving forward is so inspiring. 00:59:55.559 --> 01:00:01.000 And truthfully, I think we need more voices and stories like this to be shared in the nursing space. 01:00:01.159 --> 01:00:03.000 So thank you for being here today. 01:00:03.079 --> 01:00:05.639 I am anytime you want me back, I'll look on. 01:00:05.880 --> 01:00:07.000 Yay, I love that. 01:00:07.079 --> 01:00:07.639 Thank you, Mal. 01:00:07.880 --> 01:00:08.840 I'm in your corner. 01:00:09.079 --> 01:00:09.960 Always and forever. 01:00:10.119 --> 01:00:13.480 Well, that's it for today's episode of Life After Nursing School. 01:00:13.639 --> 01:00:18.920 I hope you feel more confident and ready to tackle the challenges that come with starting your nursing career. 01:00:19.159 --> 01:00:25.880 Remember, the first year or two might not be easy, but with the right mindset, you can overcome anything. 01:00:26.119 --> 01:00:32.840 If you found value in today's episode, I'd love for you to hit that subscribe button so you never miss a future episode. 01:00:33.079 --> 01:00:37.000 Also, please consider leaving a review on your favorite podcast platform. 01:00:37.079 --> 01:00:40.119 It helps so much in reaching other new nurses like you. 01:00:40.360 --> 01:00:43.639 Thanks for listening, and remember, you've got this. 01:00:43.800 --> 01:00:45.960 Take care and see you next time.