Kaleb Dahlgren - “Crossroads”: Finding Strength in Vulnerability の全文書き起こし

trying to navigate and unpack this experience without having all the pieces. 00:05:50.240 --> 00:05:50.720 Yeah. 00:05:50.959 --> 00:05:51.839 Yeah, for sure. 00:05:52.079 --> 00:05:57.680 I suffered a fractured skull, punctured root in my skull, scalp degleving, so this whole side of my head was shaved off. 00:05:57.920 --> 00:06:05.279 I had, I guess, severe traumatic brain injury, broken neck, broken back, blood clots, layment, muscle damage, nerve damage. 00:06:05.600 --> 00:06:08.800 So I didn't really even know my injuries, to be honest. 00:06:08.879 --> 00:06:10.639 I never even asked what my injuries were. 00:06:10.800 --> 00:06:12.560 So I really didn't care to be honest about it. 00:06:12.720 --> 00:06:19.199 I was more concerned about people that aren't here and 16 that I lost and what happened to them, why aren't they here? 00:06:19.360 --> 00:06:25.199 Like all the details I could possibly get to understand a little bit more of the situation and what actually happened. 00:06:25.759 --> 00:06:29.519 So I didn't really realize my injuries probably until I switched hospitals. 00:06:29.600 --> 00:06:34.160 That was when I kind of got another assessment and uh realized all the injuries I had. 00:06:35.040 --> 00:06:36.319 Yeah, it was really hard. 00:06:36.480 --> 00:06:45.839 And I think that I was able to cope with it and accept kind of fast that I'll never get answers for this situation. 00:06:46.000 --> 00:06:48.079 And it's out of my control too. 00:06:48.319 --> 00:06:55.519 And the what I can control is how I want to move forward and react to the situation, how I want to carry myself, my actions, my work ethic. 00:06:55.759 --> 00:07:01.360 I think that was when it really hit me was a couple of days later, I was like, well, I can't be asking why, because it'll never be a why. 00:07:01.519 --> 00:07:05.120 I just gotta continue moving forward, living life to the fullest for those who aren't here. 00:07:05.439 --> 00:07:14.639 Yeah, I'm glad that you identified that because our natural human tendency is to want to wrap it up in a neat box and have some meaning or understanding to this. 00:07:14.879 --> 00:07:20.160 And you're right, it's one of those random events that we couldn't have possibly predicted. 00:07:20.319 --> 00:07:22.160 And your brain needs to kind of catch up. 00:07:22.319 --> 00:07:26.560 So, in your language, I can hear the healing that's been happening for you. 00:07:27.439 --> 00:07:32.000 I've been really in the great headspace for a long time now. 00:07:32.160 --> 00:07:34.639 And it's been really nice to be in that great headspace. 00:07:34.800 --> 00:07:50.560 And I think that life is too short to be stuck in one place, and I've never really wanted to ever get stuck in one place, and I've always tried to learn to grow, to view the situation from different perspectives and see how it fits into my beliefs and values. 00:07:50.720 --> 00:08:03.279 And so I think that moving forward in life and having been dealt situations in my past before this crash also helped me as well to be more resilient and to come back stronger than ever too. 00:08:03.519 --> 00:08:03.839 Yeah. 00:08:04.000 --> 00:08:09.680 Can you tell us a bit about what had prepared you just to handle whatever might come along in life? 00:08:10.079 --> 00:08:12.959 Well, I think at the age of four, I got diagnosed with type 1 diabetes. 00:08:13.040 --> 00:08:17.759 And that was one of the main things in my life where I had to find the positive over negative. 00:08:17.920 --> 00:08:28.480 As a type 1 diabetic, you get pushed with needles at least five times in your fingers, and then at least five times with needles in your leg, arm, belly, bum. 00:08:28.639 --> 00:08:40.000 And so that was one of the situations where I had to learn to find the positives over negatives at the very, very young age and become way more mature than the rest of my peers because I had to manage my body to keep active. 00:08:40.159 --> 00:08:44.799 I also had to make sure that whatever I was doing, it was smart and calculated. 00:08:45.039 --> 00:08:48.639 And I'd say I had to really grow up fast with that aspect. 00:08:48.720 --> 00:08:56.399 And then ended up losing one of my teammates at a very young age, um, and a personal trainer of mine at a very young age when I was 13. 00:08:56.639 --> 00:09:05.360 And both of those were super critical pieces in my life to really understand death, just how fragile life is and to really make the most of the life that we have. 00:09:05.519 --> 00:09:09.519 Like you're never given a day tomorrow, you just gotta make the most of the day today. 00:09:09.759 --> 00:09:14.559 So I think that was another big stepping stone into me as a person and developing. 00:09:14.799 --> 00:09:17.039 And then when I was 16, I moved away from home. 00:09:17.120 --> 00:09:20.240 And at the time, my dad was severely sick. 00:09:20.399 --> 00:09:24.480 And while I was gone, actually, my mom texted me saying he's not gonna make it. 00:09:24.720 --> 00:09:33.440 And I rushed back home after a game there in Tisdale and when saw him in the hospital, and the doctors literally thought this was his last day. 00:09:33.759 --> 00:09:40.399 Living away from home at 16 and having that on your mind is hard enough as it is, especially when we're such a close family. 00:09:40.559 --> 00:09:45.200 So I've dealt with loss of stuff beforehand that has prepared me. 00:09:45.360 --> 00:09:52.960 And then also like being a diabetic and being told, no, you can't do this, you can't do that, or you should hold off because of your diabetes. 00:09:53.120 --> 00:09:58.639 So I've had lots of situations in my life where I've had to be resilient and I've had to battle back. 00:09:58.960 --> 00:10:03.360 And that was another one where obviously grander scale and a lot different. 00:10:03.519 --> 00:10:05.039 And you really can't prepare for that. 00:10:05.120 --> 00:10:09.919 But I feel like what I've been through in the past has

definitely helped mold me into the person I am today. 00:10:10.240 --> 00:10:11.360 Undoubtedly. 00:10:11.600 --> 00:10:23.360 I can really appreciate that when we go through different losses like that, you learn that you can also get through that, that you don't stay in that grief forever, but it's still significant. 00:10:23.519 --> 00:10:26.639 And do I understand that your dad ended up being okay? 00:10:27.039 --> 00:10:27.279 Yeah. 00:10:27.360 --> 00:10:29.279 Yeah, no, he's still here today, which is great. 00:10:29.440 --> 00:10:39.120 He's on about 30 pills a day, I'd say, 30 medications, but at the end of the day, he's still here and he's enjoying it and he's living life to the fullest, and that's all you can ask for. 00:10:39.360 --> 00:10:39.759 Wonderful. 00:10:39.840 --> 00:10:41.279 I'm glad to hear that. 00:10:41.679 --> 00:10:45.360 So you've written this book, Crossroads, your memoir. 00:10:45.600 --> 00:10:49.360 Tell me what this book has done for you in writing this. 00:10:49.840 --> 00:10:52.240 It's been a cathartic journey, to be honest. 00:10:52.480 --> 00:10:56.720 It's been really great just to reflect on all the people who've supported me in my life. 00:10:56.879 --> 00:11:03.519 I've had so many great supports with my parents, my family, my friends, teammates, coaches, teachers. 00:11:03.679 --> 00:11:07.679 I've honestly had amazing supports, even billets too. 00:11:07.840 --> 00:11:15.120 And so I really looked back on that when I was as I was writing the book and just am so grateful for everything that I've had. 00:11:15.200 --> 00:11:26.000 And then even after the crash, too, how much support there was around the whole world, not even just in Saskatchewan or Humboldt, but the whole world like came together and rallied around the Broncos. 00:11:26.159 --> 00:11:27.679 And that was something super special. 00:11:27.840 --> 00:11:32.720 And it kind of made me more even aware of how much other people need support too in their life. 00:11:33.039 --> 00:11:37.120 And that they're often forgot about at times in in the hospital, especially. 00:11:37.200 --> 00:11:42.000 There's a woman in a room at one point, and she only had one visitor, the awe at time. 00:11:42.480 --> 00:11:46.240 And we'd have a hallway full of visitors lined up. 00:11:46.399 --> 00:11:47.840 And that was when it really hit me. 00:11:48.000 --> 00:11:54.080 She was going through her own tragedy in her life, and we are going through our own tragedy, but she wasn't getting nearly enough support. 00:11:54.240 --> 00:12:00.080 And so now I'm way more aware and I want to bring more topics to light that people need support into. 00:12:00.879 --> 00:12:03.519 And so this journey of writing was cathartic. 00:12:03.600 --> 00:12:10.559 I was able to reflect and put together pieces that I didn't know, especially within that four-day frame that I lost. 00:12:10.879 --> 00:12:20.879 And I think for me, it's also really nice to memorialize the 16, too, who aren't

here and to at least put my thoughts to paper so people knew what I thought about them. 00:12:21.039 --> 00:12:24.240 And lots of questions are answered in that book, too. 00:12:24.399 --> 00:12:30.879 And that was another part that was really nice for me was because I've had lots of people reach out, ask questions, which there's nothing wrong with that at all. 00:12:31.039 --> 00:12:31.279 Sure. 00:12:31.440 --> 00:12:36.240 But I think in the book, I'm able to express how I feel about certain situations. 00:12:36.799 --> 00:12:45.679 And I think also on top of that, people can take something away from that and understand me better, understand the situation better from my perspective. 00:12:45.919 --> 00:12:49.679 And then lastly, it's only one out of the 29 from that bus that day, too. 00:12:49.840 --> 00:12:54.559 So there's lots of other stories too, and I'm looking forward to hearing those as well. 00:12:54.799 --> 00:12:58.399 And it's not like the Broncos book, it's just a Bronco book. 00:12:58.559 --> 00:13:05.200 And I want to make sure that that was out there and that people know that it is just my view and my viewpoints. 00:13:05.440 --> 00:13:09.919 And everyone adds their own viewpoints too on the situation, how they want to move forward from it too. 00:13:10.080 --> 00:13:12.480 But this was really great in the healing process for me. 00:13:12.720 --> 00:13:13.360 I bet. 00:13:13.519 --> 00:13:20.720 Because I can imagine like just the writing and taking the time to put your thoughts to paper and what would you want to articulate? 00:13:20.960 --> 00:13:32.080 I understand from some of the other guests that I've had on other authors as well, who have found that in their writing as a process of working through and understanding themselves better. 00:13:32.399 --> 00:13:36.639 Is there anything that's kind of surprised you in this journey about yourself? 00:13:36.879 --> 00:13:39.440 Oh, definitely that there's strength in being vulnerable. 00:13:39.679 --> 00:13:51.440 As a hockey player and male, like especially with those two in mind, you really adequate strength to physical and just physical strength where you're looking jacked. 00:13:51.600 --> 00:13:57.039 You got the rock solid abs, big arms, like not really to vulnerability. 00:13:57.200 --> 00:14:00.000 And I think that there's so much strength in being vulnerable. 00:14:00.159 --> 00:14:11.120 And I really found that by writing the book and opening myself up to the whole world, which is scary in a cell forever, and to just put my thoughts on paper. 00:14:11.200 --> 00:14:18.240 And I had in my phone notes, I had quite a few of those perception notes in my phone, but I didn't think I was ever going to share it with the world. 00:14:18.320 --> 00:14:19.679 I didn't even share it with anybody. 00:14:19.840 --> 00:14:20.960 It was just in my phone. 00:14:21.039 --> 00:14:25.759 And so to actually put it on paper and share with the world was definitely me opening up and being vulnerable. 00:14:25.919 --> 00:14:29.360 But there's also so much strength in that and healing. 00:14:29.519 --> 00:14:33.519 And I think that the ability to do that is super powerful. 00:14:33.840 --> 00:14:43.759 And really would say that now going through this process, I have a lot more respect for authors that do open up about their challenges in their life too and the stuff that they've gone through. 00:14:44.000 --> 00:14:47.120 So I think I've gained a new perspective from that. 00:14:47.360 --> 00:14:48.000 I love that. 00:14:48.159 --> 00:14:52.799 I hope that others can hear the phrase strength and vulnerability. 00:14:52.960 --> 00:14:54.000 That's powerful. 00:14:54.320 --> 00:14:58.000 Do you still get together with some of the other surviving players? 00:14:58.320 --> 00:14:58.879 Yep, we do. 00:14:58.960 --> 00:15:00.000 We get together every summer. 00:15:00.159 --> 00:15:01.600 We try to get together as a group. 00:15:01.759 --> 00:15:06.559 Um, we've gone to Vegas, Edmonton, and that was in our 2018 year. 00:15:06.720 --> 00:15:08.399 2019, we went to Kelona. 00:15:08.799 --> 00:15:10.000 2020 got canceled. 00:15:10.159 --> 00:15:15.120 So we met up on Zoom and then 2021 here, we're hoping to plan something. 00:15:15.279 --> 00:15:19.519 We kind of want to wait until everyone's vaccinated or has the opportunity to get vaccinated first. 00:15:19.679 --> 00:15:21.120 Then we'll kind of get together. 00:15:21.200 --> 00:15:23.600 So it's looking like an end of a summer type of thing. 00:15:23.759 --> 00:15:25.519 But uh yeah, we're planning to that right now. 00:15:25.600 --> 00:15:26.720 So really looking forward to that. 00:15:26.799 --> 00:15:30.159 We keep in touch in a group chat and it's nice to have that support. 00:15:30.480 --> 00:15:33.519 I'm curious because one of my other guests, Dr. 00:15:33.600 --> 00:15:45.840 Rob Lee, spoke about when veterans have gone to war together, then after that experience and that trauma of what they have gone through, they come back, but they're often posted to different places. 00:15:46.000 --> 00:15:49.279 And it's like nobody really understands what we've been through. 00:15:49.440 --> 00:15:51.919 And so there's a feeling of isolation. 00:15:52.080 --> 00:16:02.320 And so he spoke about the value of community, the value of having others who understand a similar experience, even if it's not the same to what you've been through. 00:16:02.480 --> 00:16:04.480 But this bus crash was so unique. 00:16:04.639 --> 00:16:09.279 It's not like anybody else is going to get this other than those other fellow players. 00:16:09.600 --> 00:16:12.879 Tell me what it's like when you get together and what that brings for you. 00:16:13.120 --> 00:16:19.279 Yeah, it brings a lot of emotions, especially when we first all really got together in Edmonton and Vegas in that 2018. 00:16:19.440 --> 00:16:23.200 It was hard because we didn't have our year-ender, which you normally have with your team.

00:16:23.279 --> 00:16:26.000 It's like a year end to get together, and we didn't have that. 00:16:26.159 --> 00:16:34.559 So that was kind of our year ender was being in Edmonton and Vegas together, which was difficult because you miss the other people who should be there. 00:16:35.039 --> 00:16:38.639 And you still try to enjoy it, but you're still missing that piece. 00:16:38.799 --> 00:16:48.639 And that was the hard part about it, I think, for us was that we had those missing pieces, but we still found fun in each other and we still had great lighthearted conversations and fun times too. 00:16:48.720 --> 00:16:53.759 And so I think that it does go away in a sense when you are with them. 00:16:54.000 --> 00:17:07.759 And it feels back to team, family, and you are missing part of your family for sure, but you still do have a piece of your family with you, which is another nice aspect because it's nice to have all of us still here. 00:17:07.920 --> 00:17:11.279 And I wish there was more, but it could have been a lot less. 00:17:11.519 --> 00:17:15.119 And so I'm being grateful for everybody that is here too. 00:17:15.279 --> 00:17:19.200 And I want to see them all succeed in life and have the best life possible. 00:17:19.359 --> 00:17:20.319 I I truly do. 00:17:20.400 --> 00:17:24.880 I want them to chase their dreams and passions and enjoy life to the fullest, and they have been. 00:17:24.960 --> 00:17:26.559 So it's amazing to see that. 00:17:26.880 --> 00:17:28.160 A healthy perspective. 00:17:28.240 --> 00:17:32.160 And I just want to point out to our listeners, I can hear the work you've been doing. 00:17:32.319 --> 00:17:34.960 I can hear the positive message. 00:17:35.119 --> 00:17:37.200 I love the encouragement, Caleb. 00:17:37.279 --> 00:17:40.880 And I'm just being mindful this is three years after, right? 00:17:41.119 --> 00:17:46.079 So I want people to maybe learn from you, Caleb, on how you got here. 00:17:46.240 --> 00:17:54.960 What have been some of your resilience pieces that have helped you process, work through, and get to this perspective that you're at right now? 00:17:55.200 --> 00:17:56.960 Oh, I'd say there's quite a few. 00:17:57.119 --> 00:17:59.200 I took a major approach. 00:17:59.519 --> 00:18:09.119 And since I've been through quite a few things in my life, I've learned how to cope and deal with stressful situations or situations that may put us out of alignment. 00:18:09.440 --> 00:18:14.720 And for me, a couple of things is finding the positive over the negative and focusing on that. 00:18:14.960 --> 00:18:19.839 And even in the hospital, one of the only positives when I woke up was that I was still breathing and here. 00:18:20.000 --> 00:18:21.920 And I didn't even know about support around the world. 00:18:22.000 --> 00:18:22.720 I had no idea. 00:18:22.880 --> 00:18:25.279 Well, I saw it was my parents, and that was it. 00:18:25.440 --> 00:18:28.559 That was the only thing was that I'm here and still breathing. 00:18:28.640 --> 00:18:35.359 And then the next day, positive was that I have so much support in my life and that I am able to get through this. 00:18:35.599 --> 00:18:38.960 And then the next day I was able to take a step and actually walk. 00:18:39.200 --> 00:18:45.359 And so it was just trying to focus on those positives and get that 1% every day a little bit better. 00:18:45.599 --> 00:18:50.160 Then another aspect of it was to focus on the things I can control too. 00:18:50.319 --> 00:18:53.759 And I kind of alluded to this earlier, but I couldn't even control a semi-driver. 00:18:53.920 --> 00:19:00.720 I couldn't control where I was sitting, where others were sitting, or even my injuries for that matter, or who made it, who didn't make it. 00:19:00.880 --> 00:19:07.839 But I only could control moving forward from this, how I want to react to the situation, what I wanted to do, how I wanted to treat others. 00:19:08.079 --> 00:19:12.240 And those are like really basic things, but it's hard for people to focus on those. 00:19:12.319 --> 00:19:12.559 Yes. 00:19:12.720 --> 00:19:14.559 We get caught in the stuff that we don't know. 00:19:14.720 --> 00:19:20.160 We ask why questions and try to find answers for a long, long time and get stuck on that why. 00:19:20.400 --> 00:19:29.839 But for me, I was focusing on the things I could control and not asking those why questions and accepting that there will be no answers for those questions. 00:19:30.000 --> 00:19:31.359 And I'm okay with that. 00:19:31.519 --> 00:19:36.319 And I think that's the tough part for people to get to is that kind of end to the acceptance. 00:19:36.559 --> 00:19:39.200 And then lastly, I was enjoying the grind. 00:19:39.440 --> 00:19:50.160 And we all have our own grind, whether that's work, school, relationships, sports, we all have our own grind and to enjoy it because our life could end tomorrow. 00:19:50.240 --> 00:19:57.920 And why wouldn't we try to enjoy everything we have in that moment, even if it's mundane or boring, to just enjoy it and find the positive in that time? 00:19:58.079 --> 00:20:02.319 So I'd say those three were probably one of the bigger pieces for my healing journey. 00:20:02.559 --> 00:20:15.200 But um there's tons of other stuff too, like just having gratitude for the situation, doing mindfulness, sleeping, being with people, opening up about my thoughts and beliefs to people. 00:20:15.519 --> 00:20:20.400 So I did tons and tons of different things that have really helped me heal. 00:20:20.640 --> 00:20:24.000 I think have helped me become the person I'm today, for sure. 00:20:24.319 --> 00:20:25.920 Well, that's quite a list. 00:20:26.240 --> 00:20:31.920 For those that might be just beginning their journey, they've maybe just come through something very difficult. 00:20:32.079 --> 00:20:37.440 Lots of people are still trying to figure out this pandemic and what they feel about it. 00:20:37.680 --> 00:20:40.880 So I think there's a

lot there that people could take away from it. 00:20:41.119 --> 00:20:58.559 And what I really want to encourage people as they maybe hear that list of things is that, like you're saying, one day at a time to be focusing on those things you can control and to really honor that it is a journey and that you didn't figure all that out in the first week or the first month. 00:20:58.799 --> 00:21:08.480 It's been kind of a practice from what it sounds like over time that you're now here three years later with this beautiful insight and a practice of resiliency. 00:21:08.640 --> 00:21:09.759 Would that be a good way to put it? 00:21:10.000 --> 00:21:11.200 Yeah, no, it would be a good way. 00:21:11.279 --> 00:21:16.799 And I also think another thing I would like to mention was to put myself in the shoes of people who weren't here. 00:21:16.960 --> 00:21:23.680 And I know it's a kind of a dark topic, but if I wasn't here on this earth, how would I want the survivors to live their life? 00:21:23.920 --> 00:21:29.519 Would I want them to be stuck in the native path and to not be happy and to be struggling? 00:21:29.680 --> 00:21:30.400 No, not at all. 00:21:30.480 --> 00:21:41.759 I want them to be happy, be thriving, to live out their passions and dreams, to find love and to enjoy everything that life has to offer and to not take a second for granted. 00:21:41.920 --> 00:21:45.119 And so I've thought of that lots and I put myself in that shoe. 00:21:45.200 --> 00:21:52.799 So I've tried to mold that for myself in my life and to honor those who aren't here and to make the most of it for them, but also for myself too. 00:21:52.960 --> 00:21:55.119 Because you never know when life is gone. 00:21:55.200 --> 00:21:59.599 And so I try to live my life to the fullest every day, and I did that before the crash, but now. 00:22:00.160 --> 00:22:02.079 Have so much more reason to do so after too. 00:22:03.839 --> 00:22:18.960 Each time you speak about it, it's a way of really bringing those teammates with you to honor the lives they have lived and to, like you're saying, do the best you can each day, knowing that that's what you would have wanted for anybody else if you was reversed. 00:22:19.440 --> 00:22:19.759 Yeah. 00:22:20.400 --> 00:22:38.480 A question that's still coming to mind for me, and I'd love to ask, Caleb, is when athletes play such a high level of sports and it's such a big part of your life, have you found something, a way of working out, a way of finding a place for that energy that you might have poured into hockey? 00:22:38.720 --> 00:22:39.039 Yeah. 00:22:39.119 --> 00:22:43.119 So I was able to commit to York University before the crash verbally. 00:22:43.279 --> 00:22:51.599 And then after the crash, to still offer the spot and so that they could come this fall, next fall, five years down the road, 10 years down the road. 00:22:51.920 --> 00:22:54.319 As long as I want to be a line, I have a spot there. 00:22:54.480 --> 00:22:57.359 And so that was something that really just meant the world to me. 00:22:57.519 --> 00:22:58.960 And I worked super, super hard. 00:22:59.039 --> 00:23:01.440 And I ended up going there fall of 2018. 00:23:01.599 --> 00:23:03.680 So a couple of months after the crash. 00:23:03.920 --> 00:23:05.920 And the doctors were telling me that I shouldn't go. 00:23:06.000 --> 00:23:10.799 I'd fail out if I went go down a really rough path and have a bad lifestyle. 00:23:10.960 --> 00:23:12.720 But I thought, why not give it a shot? 00:23:12.880 --> 00:23:16.160 Because at the end of the day, if I don't try, then I'll never know. 00:23:16.319 --> 00:23:23.440 And the worst that could happen is the doctors are right, but the best that could happen is that I proved them wrong and proved people who believe me right. 00:23:23.680 --> 00:23:26.319 And so I thought, you know what, let's just go for it. 00:23:26.480 --> 00:23:27.599 And so I went for it. 00:23:27.839 --> 00:23:31.759 But with the hockey aspect, I wasn't cleared for contact. 00:23:31.839 --> 00:23:34.000 And so I had to practice and work out with the team. 00:23:34.160 --> 00:23:37.359 I never was able to play a game, but I was practicing working out. 00:23:37.519 --> 00:23:47.039 And so, like you said, it was difficult because I'd go out for practices and I'd be faster than some of the guys on the team in the drills where I'd be looking really good. 00:23:47.119 --> 00:23:50.720 And the coaches and players be like, Oh, you should be playing, you're looking great. 00:23:50.880 --> 00:24:00.720 But they didn't know the other side where my brain image looked terrible and horrendous, and I shouldn't even be able to walk, talk, or remember my name based on the image. 00:24:01.039 --> 00:24:08.319 So the fact that I was able to do that myself was what doctors deemed as a miracle, but it still didn't make sense. 00:24:08.400 --> 00:24:09.839 And I had no symptoms. 00:24:10.000 --> 00:24:16.799 I was like excelling on tests, I was breaking records on my tests, passing old scores I had before. 00:24:16.960 --> 00:24:18.400 So it just didn't make sense. 00:24:18.480 --> 00:24:20.880 So I ended up going to get another scan on my brain. 00:24:20.960 --> 00:24:25.119 So I thought, okay, maybe, maybe this is just a wrong image. 00:24:25.359 --> 00:24:27.119 Maybe someone else's image of their brain. 00:24:27.279 --> 00:24:36.079 And maybe I yeah, like I did have a brain injury, I was acting weird in hospital, and I do have four days of post-traumatic amnesia, but maybe there's something on along these lines. 00:24:36.240 --> 00:24:39.839 So when checked, and sure enough, the same image came back. 00:24:40.160 --> 00:24:43.839 And that was my brain, was just how severely injured it was. 00:24:52.160 --> 00:24:52.640 Scary. 00:24:52.799 --> 00:24:53.519 I live with that. 00:24:53.599 --> 00:24:53.839 Yeah. 00:24:54.000 --> 00:24:54.960 So I lived with that. 00:24:55.119 --> 00:25:02.160 And I think it can apply to other

athletes, though, because in sports, we get concussions that take us away from the game when we least expect it. 00:25:02.240 --> 00:25:04.240 And it wasn't really our choice of going out. 00:25:04.400 --> 00:25:08.240 It was due to injuries and not even just concussions, but other injuries too. 00:25:08.559 --> 00:25:10.720 And for me, accepting that was hard. 00:25:10.799 --> 00:25:18.000 But I found a way to give back still with the team by taking on a strength and conditioning role as our strength and conditioning assistant. 00:25:18.240 --> 00:25:20.720 I was also a head recruiter for our team. 00:25:20.799 --> 00:25:24.400 So I was able to recruit players, develop a new package, videos. 00:25:24.799 --> 00:25:28.480 I did I did tons of work with that, taught to toss the players too. 00:25:28.640 --> 00:25:32.160 And then I also got involved with our York community as well. 00:25:32.240 --> 00:25:36.480 So I volunteered with Heroes Hockey, which is a program for underprivileged children. 00:25:36.640 --> 00:25:39.440 Yeah, I became a student ambassador. 00:25:39.680 --> 00:25:44.000 There's team representative for the varsity athletic student council. 00:25:44.240 --> 00:25:55.519 And I was heavily involved in many other aspects of giving back externally too with my own mentorship program, uh national ambassador for JDRF, and lots of other diabetes work. 00:25:55.759 --> 00:26:00.400 But I think for me, I wanted to really just succeed in every other aspect. 00:26:00.559 --> 00:26:11.039 So I'd be the best version of myself and try to have excellence in my words in academics, athletics, community, relationships. 00:26:11.200 --> 00:26:13.279 I wanted to excel in all those areas. 00:26:13.440 --> 00:26:24.480 And obviously, I couldn't play on Friday and Saturday, but I still wanted to be a leader within the team and still motivate the guys and still be that positive influence, even though I couldn't really be there on the ice for Friday and Saturdays. 00:26:24.559 --> 00:26:28.400 I still want to be a leader away from those games and everywhere else. 00:26:28.559 --> 00:26:33.119 So during practice in the dressing room, during workouts, I wanted to be that leader. 00:26:33.440 --> 00:26:35.279 That's a lot of things you're involved with. 00:26:35.440 --> 00:26:41.039 I really appreciate hearing what you've poured yourself into and that you still get to be connected. 00:26:41.200 --> 00:26:47.039 I almost get the feeling that you get a sense of team still by being part of it in that way. 00:26:47.279 --> 00:26:47.680 For sure. 00:26:47.759 --> 00:26:48.400 I do 100%. 00:26:48.720 --> 00:26:58.480 And it's weird to act as the liaison between the players and coach, where I wasn't really a player because I wasn't playing per se, but I really wasn't a coach because I wasn't really coaching. 00:26:58.640 --> 00:27:00.960 And I was doing that recruiting role, which is in the middle. 00:27:01.119 --> 00:27:08.720 And so it was really cool spot, actually, where I was able to develop such a great relationship with my coach and we built such a great trust and bond. 00:27:08.880 --> 00:27:14.160 But then I also had that great relationship with the players too, where I was able to hang out with them, spend time with them. 00:27:14.319 --> 00:27:17.440 My roommate was on the men's team, both of them were on the men's team. 00:27:17.519 --> 00:27:20.000 And so I became really good friends with them too. 00:27:20.160 --> 00:27:22.960 And I think that I had the best of both worlds at that time. 00:27:23.039 --> 00:27:27.839 And I was also able to succeed academically too and help other guys succeed as well. 00:27:28.000 --> 00:27:36.160 So I think that I really tried to take on the role of just being the best person I can be away from the games and uh help the team in any capacity. 00:27:36.480 --> 00:27:42.640 I bet that you have a great deal of credibility on that team and motivating, encouraging. 00:27:42.720 --> 00:27:45.920 I can't think of a greater leader that they'd want to listen to. 00:27:46.240 --> 00:27:46.799 Well, thank you. 00:27:46.880 --> 00:27:47.759 Yeah, I don't know. 00:27:47.839 --> 00:27:51.119 I'd say that there's definitely a lot that I have to learn still. 00:27:51.279 --> 00:27:55.599 And I think that they have definitely taken some stuff away from me, though, too, which is great. 00:27:55.759 --> 00:27:59.920 And I think with every team, there's leaders on all teams, and everyone leads differently. 00:28:00.079 --> 00:28:04.799 And so my style of leadership is one way, and there's other ways too that people can lead. 00:28:05.200 --> 00:28:11.759 Well, I appreciate you saying that, but I just think there's a sort of a credibility that comes from experience as well in what you've been through. 00:28:11.839 --> 00:28:14.559 And I can hear the message that you would give people. 00:28:15.119 --> 00:28:17.039 So what's next for you? 00:28:17.359 --> 00:28:22.799 Well, I'd say next is I graduated here on Sunday, finished my last final. 00:28:22.880 --> 00:28:24.400 So I unofficially graduated. 00:28:24.480 --> 00:28:29.759 I guess I graduate in June here, but hopefully chiropractic studies is next up for the fall. 00:28:29.920 --> 00:28:36.160 I've been in application process so far, and we'll hear back here at the end of May if I got accepted or not for this fall. 00:28:36.240 --> 00:28:37.920 And I'm really looking forward to that. 00:28:38.079 --> 00:28:38.960 That's my passion. 00:28:39.039 --> 00:28:40.480 And I really want to help others. 00:28:40.559 --> 00:28:44.960 And I know it's fuel for my soul, truly to give back is fuel for my soul. 00:28:45.039 --> 00:28:52.319 So if I'm able to help people live a healthy and happy, pain-free lifestyle through chiropractic, I think that's a perfect spot for me. 00:28:52.480 --> 00:28:56.799 So I've dealt with injuries, I've dealt with pain, mental, physical, and emotional pain. 00:28:56.960 --> 00:29:03.920 And so I really

want them to feel their best selves and to create a relationship with all these people that come into my office. 00:29:04.240 --> 00:29:05.680 That's a great aspiration. 00:29:05.839 --> 00:29:09.440 Do you think you would have been doing this had the accident not happened? 00:29:09.759 --> 00:29:11.119 I honestly think I would have. 00:29:11.279 --> 00:29:15.759 When I was a teen, I went to a chiropractor, and that was when I first really fell in love with it. 00:29:15.839 --> 00:29:16.799 I was 13. 00:29:17.119 --> 00:29:25.200 And I had issues with my back as a child, lower back issues, my entire kind of hockey career up till about 13. 00:29:25.599 --> 00:29:31.759 And that was when my life really changed and my pain went away, and my passion kind of came out. 00:29:31.920 --> 00:29:33.279 I was like, this is so cool. 00:29:33.519 --> 00:29:36.079 I became intrigued with the human body, loved it. 00:29:36.240 --> 00:29:37.839 And so that was definitely one of them. 00:29:37.920 --> 00:29:40.240 And I know a principal was on the list too. 00:29:40.400 --> 00:29:43.200 Um, I even physiotherapist was on there too. 00:29:43.440 --> 00:29:52.240 I just really wanted to do something that could really help others and to make an impact on their lives and to hopefully cultivate a better future. 00:29:52.559 --> 00:29:52.880 Yeah. 00:29:53.039 --> 00:29:58.400 So that theme has already been there and well planted in you long before this. 00:29:58.559 --> 00:30:00.319 And even a desire to help people. 00:30:00.480 --> 00:30:07.759 Like I had wondered earlier in our conversation if because of the accident that motivated you to want to make a difference for others. 00:30:07.920 --> 00:30:10.160 But that's been in you from the beginning. 00:30:10.480 --> 00:30:11.759 Yeah, it has for sure. 00:30:11.920 --> 00:30:24.400 I'd yeah, I'd say even as a young kid, I go and volunteer at my parents' care home and I played at the residents and just played games, socialize with them, and they're all different shapes and sizes in the care homes, too. 00:30:24.480 --> 00:30:25.440 And I loved it. 00:30:25.519 --> 00:30:29.680 It was just great bonding with people and connecting with them and just putting a smile on their face. 00:30:29.759 --> 00:30:34.480 And for me, that's one of the things I really enjoy in life is putting a smile on other people's faces. 00:30:34.799 --> 00:30:36.160 Wow, I love that. 00:30:36.400 --> 00:30:40.000 We're very lucky to have your desire to help others. 00:30:40.160 --> 00:30:44.720 And I want to mention you have a charitable organization for diabetes. 00:30:44.799 --> 00:30:45.279 Is that right? 00:30:45.519 --> 00:30:47.440 Yeah, it's not a nonprofit yet. 00:30:47.599 --> 00:30:51.440 Right now, just I guess a mentorship program for type 1 diabetic children. 00:30:51.599 --> 00:30:54.559 And I actually created it my uh season in Humboldt. 00:30:54.720 --> 00:30:58.880 So in 2017, it was uh one of my dreams I had. 00:30:59.039 --> 00:31:00.880 I thought of it when I was 16. 00:31:01.039 --> 00:31:04.400 I ended up helping one of my buddies with his type 1 diabetic journey. 00:31:04.480 --> 00:31:05.680 He just got diagnosed. 00:31:05.839 --> 00:31:09.599 I helped him through it and I just like gave him tips and tricks and was always by his side. 00:31:09.839 --> 00:31:11.279 He's like, You really helped me a lot. 00:31:11.359 --> 00:31:12.880 And I was like, Yeah, thank you, appreciate that. 00:31:12.960 --> 00:31:16.960 And I thought a bit more and I was like, I could really help other people with their diabetic journeys. 00:31:17.119 --> 00:31:18.319 Why aren't I doing this? 00:31:18.559 --> 00:31:22.160 So I end up talking to my parents and they were like, Yeah, you gotta wait until you're done high school. 00:31:22.240 --> 00:31:22.880 That's a lot. 00:31:23.039 --> 00:31:28.720 So I waited until I was done high school and I still wanted to help out and move to play junior A in Notre Dame. 00:31:28.880 --> 00:31:32.880 It's a town in Wilcos, which is 400 people, which really isn't that big. 00:31:33.039 --> 00:31:35.200 And so I played there for two years. 00:31:35.279 --> 00:31:40.400 And in my 19-year-old season, I just still didn't feel right and I wanted to do this program so bad. 00:31:40.640 --> 00:31:43.440 So I ended up asking for a trade to a bigger center. 00:31:43.599 --> 00:31:47.839 And I was fortunate enough to end up in Humboldt where I could start my program called Dalgran's Dia Beauties. 00:31:48.079 --> 00:31:49.039 And it was awesome. 00:31:49.119 --> 00:31:54.720 I got to bring a type 1 diabetic and their family out for a pregame meal at Johnny's Bistro, which is a restaurant in Humboldt. 00:31:54.799 --> 00:31:58.640 And then they'd come out to the game and get complimentary tickets. 00:31:58.799 --> 00:32:06.960 The Dia Beauty, we get to wear a jersey, uh, watch warmups, and then the Dia Beauty would participate in a ceremonial face-off with me and the captain of the other team. 00:32:07.200 --> 00:32:14.640 And then afterwards, I'd meet with them upstairs, chat with them about diabetes, and then I'd go to their school, do a school presentation. 00:32:14.799 --> 00:32:19.039 And then lastly, they get into their Facebook group chat with all the other Dia Beauty families. 00:32:19.119 --> 00:32:23.920 And so I want to create a community and do something that I would have liked as a child. 00:32:24.079 --> 00:32:26.640 And I think for me growing up, I felt alone. 00:32:26.799 --> 00:32:30.319 I had lots of questions, but I never would really get true answers. 00:32:30.480 --> 00:32:35.759 And the doctors only know so much, especially if they don't have diabetes, is a lot harder than if they do. 00:32:36.000 --> 00:32:40.720 And so for me, there's some questions like what would I do if I went camping on the weekend? 00:32:40.880 --> 00:32:43.519 What do you do during games when your blood sugars go high or low? 00:32:43.680 --> 00:32:46.480 What

activities make your blood sugars go high and low during sport? 00:32:46.640 --> 00:32:49.920 How do you tell someone in a relationship what about your diabetes? 00:32:50.079 --> 00:32:54.640 Just these little things that I wanted to know, but didn't get answers for. 00:32:54.799 --> 00:32:55.839 So I just learned. 00:32:56.000 --> 00:33:00.079 And so I wanted to create this so that people can know that they can pursue their dreams and passions. 00:33:00.160 --> 00:33:06.319 And these children have someone to talk to about this and ask these questions and be there for support when times do get tough. 00:33:06.400 --> 00:33:11.759 Because being a diabetic is a 24-7 disease, and it's not just something that you can push to the side. 00:33:11.920 --> 00:33:15.359 So it is life-threatening and you need to be on 24-7 with it. 00:33:15.680 --> 00:33:23.119 This really speaks well to resilience, the way that you are creating community, even for people with diabetes, so that you're not alone. 00:33:23.279 --> 00:33:35.039 And the benefit of having someone to look up to or help you through that, maybe even an older teen or a young adult, sometimes that's received differently than just learning from your parents what you need to do. 00:33:35.200 --> 00:33:40.240 To know that another teenager has gone camping and this is how you can navigate it. 00:33:40.480 --> 00:33:41.359 Yep, no, 100%. 00:33:41.680 --> 00:33:44.960 And I think it's really great for them, even bounce ideas off me too. 00:33:45.039 --> 00:33:46.079 Like, what do you think of this? 00:33:46.240 --> 00:33:48.000 Or how do you like how do you drink? 00:33:48.160 --> 00:33:54.559 Because everyone's at that age when you get to like 16, 17, 18, everyone wants to drink and all your friends are drinking, but how do you drink? 00:33:54.799 --> 00:33:56.480 Being safe and smart about it. 00:33:56.720 --> 00:34:10.239 And I think that I'm able to hopefully help them throughout these times through experiences I've learned and then also how to live their life enjoyable, but also to not let diabetes manage them or they manage the diabetes, but they don't let it manage them. 00:34:10.480 --> 00:34:11.840 That's a great slogan. 00:34:12.159 --> 00:34:28.960 I wish the listeners could see your face when you talk about your charity because you just light up when you talk about helping others, not just in that case, but each time you talked about the ways in which you're involved in things that are making this world a better place, you just completely glow. 00:34:29.280 --> 00:34:29.840 Well, thank you. 00:34:29.920 --> 00:34:30.559 I appreciate that. 00:34:30.639 --> 00:34:36.559 And I think that is my why on this earth too, is to truly help others or have a positive impact on this earth. 00:34:36.800 --> 00:34:48.719 And even with the book, that was the whole goal was to help others throughout their own challenges by sharing my story and then also to hopefully turn something negative into something positive for others. 00:34:48.960 --> 00:34:51.599 They can have their own healing too throughout the book. 00:34:52.000 --> 00:34:56.400 Well, I hope they're going to read it because I think that you've got a lot of wisdom to share. 00:34:56.639 --> 00:35:11.039 And there is value in hearing how somebody else has navigated some really hard experiences to help us have insight and a bit of knowledge on how we might want to navigate it because it's not a one size fits all. 00:35:11.199 --> 00:35:15.519 But there's certainly some themes that can be key to our wellness strategies. 00:35:16.079 --> 00:35:16.400 Yep. 00:35:16.480 --> 00:35:18.159 Like you said, everyone grieves differently. 00:35:18.239 --> 00:35:23.360 And I've came to learn that, especially right after the crash, and just how everyone does heal differently. 00:35:23.440 --> 00:35:24.400 And that's completely fine. 00:35:24.480 --> 00:35:31.280 And I think it's good to accept that and to know that there's no right way to heal and there's no wrong way to heal either. 00:35:31.440 --> 00:35:35.760 And that it isn't linear and it will come in waves sometimes, and that's okay too. 00:35:35.920 --> 00:35:42.079 So I think that people need to understand that what that maybe I did isn't maybe what works best for them. 00:35:42.320 --> 00:35:44.800 But at the end of the day, everybody heals differently. 00:35:45.840 --> 00:35:48.000 Yeah, I appreciate your mentioning that. 00:35:48.239 --> 00:35:53.920 Well, Caleb, is there anything else that you can think of that you would want our listeners to hear? 00:35:54.719 --> 00:36:02.559 Honestly, I think just to really be grateful for everything that there is, and it could be always worse. 00:36:02.719 --> 00:36:21.440 And I really truly mean that because even looking across the other side of the world, say for Africa, for example, we have a family of five whose mother works 12 hours a day in a field to just get enough money to pay for their food for that day, and that's it. 00:36:21.920 --> 00:36:24.320 And their conditions are horrible. 00:36:24.559 --> 00:36:28.480 So we're very fortunate even to have this podcast and be on this podcast right now. 00:36:28.639 --> 00:36:33.440 We are extremely fortunate to have the life that we have and to actually enjoy the little things too. 00:36:33.599 --> 00:36:41.760 And I found beauty in even going and sitting and looking at the stars in the sky, or even looking at the water along the river, sitting on rocks. 00:36:42.000 --> 00:36:45.599 So I think that finding the beauty in little things is super special. 00:36:45.679 --> 00:36:50.880 And that was one of the things that really did help me heal too, was having that gratitude and being grateful. 00:36:51.039 --> 00:36:52.320 So I had a gratitude journal. 00:36:52.400 --> 00:37:00.639 I wrote down three things I was grateful for every day, and then also just find the small moments in life to be precious because life does come fast. 00:37:00.719 -->

00:37:03.039 And so to really enjoy it will we have it. 00:37:03.360 --> 00:37:06.960 Yeah, great wisdom because we only have today for sure. 00:37:07.440 --> 00:37:08.559 Yeah, you got that one right. 00:37:08.800 --> 00:37:10.719 Well, Caleb, thank you so much. 00:37:10.880 --> 00:37:13.119 It really is a blessing having you here today. 00:37:13.280 --> 00:37:19.599 And I have no doubt that our listeners are going to get a number of gems from your shared knowledge today. 00:37:19.920 --> 00:37:20.320 Awesome. 00:37:20.480 --> 00:37:21.760 Well, thank you so much for having me on here. 00:37:21.840 --> 00:37:24.960 I'm completely honored, you thought of me and really happy to be on this. 00:37:25.199 --> 00:37:27.679 Well, I wish you all the best in your career. 00:37:27.840 --> 00:37:32.480 I have no doubt you're going to have some very happy chiropractic patients in your future. 00:37:32.880 --> 00:37:33.280 Awesome. 00:37:33.360 --> 00:37:34.079 Well, thank you so much. 00:37:34.239 --> 00:37:35.440 Really do appreciate that. 00:37:35.760 --> 00:37:36.960 My pleasure. 00:37:42.239 --> 00:37:47.519 Caleb has been working on his resiliency practice since a very young age. 00:37:47.760 --> 00:37:56.400 It is often on our reflection that we realize that we've been growing our resiliency over time, allowing each life experience to help us grow stronger. 00:37:57.039 --> 00:38:07.599 Whether it was getting diagnosed with diabetes at the age of four or recovering from a traumatic bus crash, Caleb has been developing his formula for bouncing back. 00:38:08.480 --> 00:38:17.440 Highlighting some of the initial steps to moving forward, Caleb homed in on what he could control and an ongoing practice of gratitude. 00:38:18.320 --> 00:38:27.920 He reminds us that in our resilience practice, we are discovering which things to let go of while also choosing which new practices to add in. 00:38:28.800 --> 00:38:37.440 An example would be to assess what he has control over and working toward a place of acceptance, no longer asking why. 00:38:38.800 --> 00:38:48.639 Adding in a practice of gratitude, mindfulness, connecting with his close community of friends and family, and learning to open up and share his thoughts more. 00:38:49.119 --> 00:38:52.480 In other words, finding strength in being vulnerable. 00:38:53.519 --> 00:38:59.199 Caleb has also mastered the art of reframing in seeing another side to the picture. 00:39:00.000 --> 00:39:06.639 Even following devastation and loss, he has found purpose and meaning to much of what he's involved in today. 00:39:07.519 --> 00:39:09.280 One of my previous guests, Dr. 00:39:09.360 --> 00:39:15.920 Doug Walker, also referred to this practice as finding a more helpful way to look at challenges or circumstances. 00:39:16.960 --> 00:39:23.360 Although hockey no longer takes the front seat in Caleb's life, you all picked up on his passion for helping others. 00:39:24.079 --> 00:39:27.599 In fact, he named it as fuel for

his soul. 00:39:28.559 --> 00:39:37.039 With a longstanding desire to support humans on their journey, Caleb seems to have tapped into his special gift very early on in life. 00:39:37.679 --> 00:39:44.559 It is in recognizing a need in others and being able to offer our support that we discover something bigger than ourselves. 00:39:46.079 --> 00:39:52.320 For those of you who have been following this podcast, you will know that I love to leave a few reflection questions. 00:39:52.800 --> 00:40:03.119 So if you're driving, you might even want to pull over and ask yourself Do you have a negative story that has kept you stuck or prevented you from embracing a new challenge? 00:40:04.480 --> 00:40:07.599 What is one courageous step you could take today? 00:40:08.559 --> 00:40:12.719 And in the words of Caleb, if you don't try, you'll never know. 00:40:16.159 --> 00:40:20.400 Thank you for listening to this episode of a resilience project. 00:40:20.559 --> 00:40:23.519 We would not be doing this podcast without you. 00:40:23.760 --> 00:40:34.480 If you or someone you know has an inspirational story or is helping to build resilience in their community, please email me at cindy at a resilienceproject.com. 00:40:34.960 --> 00:40:37.039 In fact, email me either way. 00:40:37.199 --> 00:40:38.880 I would love to hear from you. 00:40:39.119 --> 00:40:44.480 My hope is to feature an episode periodically on your letters of resilience. 00:40:44.719 --> 00:40:51.280 I'm very interested in hearing your story of how you have tackled hard things and what worked for you. 00:40:51.440 --> 00:40:57.119 With your permission, I hope to share some of these stories along the way with our listeners. 00:40:57.519 --> 00:41:03.920 Also, check out my website, arresilienceproject.com to learn more about our amazing guests. 00:41:04.400 --> 00:41:10.559 Your presence here is important because together we are cultivating a village of resilient individuals. 00:41:10.960 --> 00:41:17.360 You are creating a space for their stories to be shared and the sacred space for learning to occur. 00:41:17.679 --> 00:41:19.119 I also have a favor. 00:41:19.440 --> 00:41:27.519 I would love for you to go to your preferred podcast platform, rate and review the podcast so that we will know how we're doing. 00:41:27.760 --> 00:41:35.360 I also would like to express my gratitude to the amazing team of volunteers that have jumped on board to support this project. 00:41:35.519 --> 00:41:40.159 You will find each of those beautiful people on my website on the team page. 00:41:40.400 --> 00:41:47.760 As you go about this week, I invite you to think about one way that you can continue to grow your resilient muscle. 00:41:48.079 --> 00:41:51.199 What is one thing you can start with today? 00:41:51.840 --> 00:41:53.599 See you next week. 00:41:58.719 --> 00:42:03.760 Ever find yourself waiting endlessly at a big box pharmacy, feeling like just another number? 00:42:04.000 --> 00:42:07.840 At Tablet Pharmacy, they provide the personalized service you deserve. 00:42:08.079 --> 00:42:14.400 They offer free delivery and blister packaging options to make managing your medications easier than ever. 00:42:15.199 --> 00:42:18.639 Check their competitive prices online at tabletpharmacy.ca.