TRASCRIZIONE 🔗
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Speaker 1: Hey y'all, this is Erin Kinsey. Over the last few years, my relationship with Jesus has just really changed. I feel like I decided to dive in and make it my own. The Lord loves me more as a daughter than he loves me as a singer. And me sitting in my room alone with my Bible open, my worth is never more than right there. And this is the Upload.
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Speaker 2: Texas-born country artist, songwriter. She started pursuing music when she was just 11 years old. Followed this dream here to Nashville. And her debut album, Suede, is officially out this week. Y'all welcome Erin Kinsey to the upload.
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Speaker 1: Yes.
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Speaker 2: How are you?
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Speaker 1: I'm so good. I'm so excited for this week and to be here talking and all the things. It's an exciting time.
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Speaker 2: I feel like these conversations around this table are always so cool because it's just like you're used to talking about you as an artist and all the things that are happening. But I feel like there's this shift happening in the world right now where we're kind of less focused on who's on the stage and kind of focusing on things that are important and things that matter.
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Speaker 1: Truly. Truly.
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Speaker 2: I just, I love this post. I'm going to bring it up first things first, because I feel like this was like one of the huge things that following you and then seeing you post about being baptized, like in your way. And then just like this long paragraph just about like your understanding and relationship with the Lord, how that's changed and really just diving into that.
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Speaker 1: Yeah.
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Speaker 2: Just your story in general. Let's start there. Let's talk about the post that everybody has been talking about this, you getting baptized in Norway. I know, in Norway. Which is so cool. Lead us up to that moment and what happened.
00:01:36
Speaker 1: Well, so it was something, I was thinking about getting re-baptized for a while, maybe for a year and a half. I got baptized when I was eight years old. at the church that I grew up going to in Texas. And, um, obviously I was eight, so I don't remember too much. Um, I remember going to Chili's afterwards and that was cool. Um, but I, funny enough, my mom said that the video equipment at the church that day was randomly down. And so they said they were going to get video of it and it didn't happen. So I think maybe if I had that video to look back on over the years, I would like remember it better, like recall it better or something. But I didn't have that. So over the last few years, my relationship with Jesus has just really changed. I feel like I decided to dive in and make it my own and actually start reading my Bible. Crazy concept.
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Speaker 2: Yeah.
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Speaker 1: And gotten like a Bible study with a lot of women that I really respect and love and heard about their journeys and just kind of how deep it can go. So after being around them, learning more, it really made me feel like, honestly, when I was, I go to Crosspoint here, and I would be at church on the weekends and they would do kind of the baptism call where they're like, you can.
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Speaker 2: Get baptized and stuff.
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Speaker 1: And I would feel this like tug on my heart, like maybe I should do it, which was weird because I had already been baptized. And sat with that for a while, had one of my girlfriends in my Bible study get rebaptized. And I didn't realize that was a thing you could do. Not that it makes you any more saved, but just something for you and your relationship with Jesus, something to look back on. So I was throwing around this idea, thought about just, you know, doing it one Sunday at Crosspoint and going in and getting dunked, but decided that I really wanted to make it something I could never forget just because I didn't really remember doing it when I was eight. So started thinking about how I could do it in a way that felt really specific to my story and to me. And honestly, over the last couple of years have like, you know, I wasn't a girl that really dreamt about getting married ever. I dreamed about music. I dreamed about the shows and about things. But, you know, people come along and then all of a sudden the right person does. And you're like, oh, my gosh, I want to get married. So thinking about that and the things that I thought about would be important for that moment. man, it really started getting me thinking about being baptized and the things that you want to be special about that moment. And it's about having people around you to see you witness that moment and share that with you and making sure it's somewhere beautiful and that it's things where it really feels sacred and special and started bringing those concepts and ideas of like, well, I mean, if I would want that in my wedding, I would definitely want that in a baptism. So pause that story. Last, I guess maybe a couple years ago now, I randomly had a song catch fire in Norway and in Norway exclusively. I was putting out a project and I had a different song kind of catching fire here in the States. And just this one song, I think someone in the trucking community, like semi-trucking community found it.
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Speaker 2: I love that. My parents drive a semi-truck, so that's awesome.
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Speaker 1: Okay, love it. So somebody did a tour of their truck. to my song, and I was like, okay, never have I ever, but the video did really well, and other people in the trucking community, again, in Norway, found this song, and it started taking off, and everybody was making videos of their truck to my song, which is hilarious to me, because I am just such a, I'm not really in this in my truck community myself, per se, but I'm connected to it in this way through music. And I started getting invited to play festivals over there, play headlining shows over there. And it was one of those things that I've been told and have read
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that the Lord is so much more creative than I. But in every way where I thought I was over here planning out social media posts or release strategies and things, I never would have put together something that creative. That the Lord would allow my music to connect with people. in that way with those people and would lead to me getting to go over there. So I've been in Norway like six times in the last two years.
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Speaker 2: Amazing.
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Speaker 1: And have just gone over and done my little thing and come home and have really created a audience specifically there. And it's become so sweet to me because I associate it with the Lord being so much more creative than I. So we had a festival we were playing this summer and this baptism idea was on my heart. And I was like, oh my gosh, how crazy would it be to do it over there? And started thinking about it. And I was like, I'm sure you can't do that. Like, it's probably like illegal or something. I don't know. It has to be complicated. And started doing more research on like what baptism is and what makes it quote unquote official. And if you can get in the water on the side of the road in Norway. And the more I read about it, the more I was like, I think you can just go do this. So I called my manager first and I was like, do you think we could have some time in the schedule to maybe stop on the side of the road and go get in some water and me get dunked really quick? And he was like, absolutely. So we took an earlier flight over there and we had a three-hour drive from Oslo to.
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Speaker 2: Where we were going.
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Speaker 1: Funny enough, we were playing a festival in Arendelle Which, you with daughters.
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Speaker 2: Yes.
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Speaker 1: It's literally the town that Frozen is based off of. So I'm like, okay, stars keep aligning.
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Speaker 2: I'm like, this is perfect.
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Speaker 1: So we drive through all of this coastline down to Arendelle from Oslo. And I'm literally... googling like all my Google Maps or Apple Maps or whatever and just zooming in and thinking like, OK, this road looks pretty close to water. Like I bet we could skirt off.
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Speaker 2: And we did.
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Speaker 1: And I asked my drummer if he would baptize me because he plays for a church. And I knew he was a Christian and strong believer and he had been baptized, which from what I read was the requirement. So I was like, perfect. And he luckily said yes. And we literally just like pulled off the side of the road. My whole band was there and my manager's wife was there and I'm close friends with her. And I got in the water and got baptized. Yeah, it's crazy. And it's something that I've gotten to talk about so much. And even the idea of posting about it, I like weighed back and forth of if I was going to do that or not. Um, and I'm just so glad everything that happened with it felt so special and I'm, I'm so happy I did it.
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Speaker 2: I just want to first point out
the fact that you're talking about getting rebaptized, right? I feel like this is one of those things that a lot of people are like, oh, it's cool. I was baptized as a kid. I'm covered. But I think it's such an important thing when you have your own relationship, like when you're not living off of your parents' faith or grandparents, whoever, you know, was like a spiritual leader in your life. Absolutely. When you officially have that relationship.
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Speaker 1: On your own.
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Speaker 2: It's different because you're like, I want to I want to make this decision.
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Speaker 1: Right.
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Speaker 2: Which, you know, because I was baptized in the fourth grade. So it's just like I was probably in the same realm. I was like, yeah, I wanted to get baptized.
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Speaker 1: Yeah.
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Speaker 2: Like the weight of it as an adult and making that decision.
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Speaker 1: It's different.
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Speaker 2: It is so different. And same. I got repaptized in 2019. So that's awesome. It's one of those things as like an adult where I was kind of in the same thing. I was like, can I redo this? Is that weird?
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Speaker 1: Am I like, do I have to undo something to redo it? I was like, is there like a.
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Speaker 2: Problem with this? Well, and I also at that point in time when I was re-baptized, I was like in leadership, like not on staff, but I was like in a leadership role like at church.
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Speaker 1: Mm-hmm.
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Speaker 2: And I was like, are people going to think I'm weird? Like, oh, that was in leadership. Like she was getting re-baptized. Like I thought she was already qualified.
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Speaker 1: Yeah, was she not baptized? Was she not a believer? Totally.
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Speaker 2: So those like thoughts run through people's minds. So I feel like if somebody's watching or listening to this and thinking about getting baptized, but they're like, but I already have been. I can't redo that. My pastor's wife got re-baptized. a couple years ago you.
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Speaker 3: Know what I mean if the pastor's wife is doing it I mean they got all the knowledge in the world so it's like don't be afraid to make that step and I think it's so special that you made it so special it's not something to be taken lightly But also, too, like on a Sunday when you're at church, when they say that they have extra shorts and shirts and towels.
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Speaker 1: They do.
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Speaker 2: They sure do, sister.
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Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely.
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Speaker 2: So if you feel that pull that day, walk down.
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Speaker 1: A hundred percent.
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Speaker 3: I know.
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Speaker 1: I almost did it a few times. And I'm sure there would have been something really special about that, too, about just like following that initial pull. But truthfully, like it was wild to me how many thoughts came in my head that could not have been from God about. the whole experience about that. I didn't need to do it. It was unnecessary that I shouldn't post about it because what are people going to think? Are you posting it to be self-serving? Like all of these things and any, I mean, that's when like a good community around you that can clock that stuff and be like, you know what? That doesn't really sound like something Jesus would say, does it? Can pull that to the surface. So definitely grateful to have people around me that pushed me to do it.
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Speaker 2: It is so true. That voice of like condemnation. Oh, yeah. It's never from God.
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Speaker 1: No, no. Like judgment and or even a fear. It's like that is not. Just don't talk like that. You don't do that.
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Speaker 2: No, it's always going to be kind. It's going to be peaceful. It's not going to be shameful. It's not going to be like you never. Exactly.
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Speaker 1: Exactly.
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Speaker 2: And I love that you brought that up because it's so true. That voice that holds you back is usually the voice of the enemy because what you're doing is. so much bigger for the kingdom that the enemy is going to do anything that he can to stop you from getting in that water.
00:11:46
Speaker 1: A hundred percent. And so one of the reasons I really wanted to do it, um, to like now one was having the trip booked really helped feel like a good time to do it. Um, but with my debut album coming out, I really wanted to do it first. I was like, this is so important to me to, um, say this and put this out in the world and have this for me as I'm walking into a season that is full of fear and full of ego and full of, um, so many different outside forces and inner forces and everything going on. Um, I was like, I just want to have this to look back on. And it's been wild to me how many times I've already thought back on it and leaned on it and viewed it as an act of surrender. Um, It's been huge. And walking into a week like this where, you know, when the music's your own still and you haven't shared it all, it feels like anything could happen. And then as things start happening, it's kind of a reality check to where like, hey, like we're going to know what it's going to do. It's going to go out in the world and hopefully it does great things. But definitely had a compass for this project that I hadn't been so, for lack of a better word, strict with. there was a song that said damn in it, which I normally have, you know, just kept that in there. And I was listening to it. I'm like, you know, I don't really feel like it's serving that much of a purpose being there. It's just like an extra syllable. And so I actually ended up pre-recording the vocal and taking it out. And not because you can't say that. Not because it's that big.
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Speaker 2: Of a deal.
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Speaker 1: But over the last year, I did a lot of headlining shows and had a lot of five, six, seven-year-old's come to my shows and singing the words. And I was like, man, if it's going to be in there, I'm going to make sure like it has to
be in there. The bar kind of went up for saying things that I didn't feel like, you know, just were necessary. And having that perspective over the project, being able to really have an outward expression, it definitely made me think through all of that stuff a second time.
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Speaker 2: Well, and those convictions will get you so like they'll hit you right in the face.
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Speaker 1: Yeah.
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Speaker 2: Where did that come from?
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Speaker 1: Oh, 100 percent. Something I've never thought about. Yeah. It was wild. I think it was.
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Speaker 2: I mean, it had to have been like maybe five or six years ago at this point. I remember doing a podcast talking to someone. And we were talking about, you know, I love Jesus, but I cuss a little bit. And that was just like our thing. And I'm like, there's nothing wrong with that. But like now having kids, like two little girls that watch me and repeat the words that I say.
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Speaker 1: Oh, wow. Yeah.
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Speaker 2: A mirror. It's like the conviction was just like, do you really need to say that word in front of that? Like you can say that sentence without that word. And I'm like, yeah, you're probably right.
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Speaker 1: And you can cuss someone out without saying a cuss word. My goodness. You can say some stuff, but. Yeah. No, it's interesting how the Lord will just like poke at little things and be like, have you ever thought about this? Have you ever looked into this? And I think that's something that for me has just made me feel so, for lack of a better word, saved like i genuinely have given my heart to jesus and do walk with him um because i feel like he's pushing me to be better and i feel like if i didn't have those little nudges it would be easy to get in my head again and wonder if i've really turned my heart over if i'm really i've i've always been so type a that i'm like i just want to know for sure and faith is just not doesn't work like that girl um it really doesn't um but i think it's things like that that are just little I mean, honestly, as uncomfortable as conviction is, there's also a piece in it of like, oh, I do have a heart that's being transformed. So, yeah.
00:15:27
Speaker 2: What a cool realization, too, to just know that being a type A person where you're like, I need to have the checklist. I need to know what to do. I need to know what time I need to check it off. All the things. And like you said, being a Christian is so like. here are my plans.
00:15:44
Speaker 1: Yes.
00:15:45
Speaker 2: Hopefully something will happen to them.
00:15:47
Speaker 1: Literally.
00:15:47
Speaker 2: Let me know if I can do anything to help, you know?
00:15:50
Speaker 1: Honestly, for sure. And I also feel like the Lord loves me too much to let it happen a way that I could take credit for. And that's been one of the biggest things I've seen throughout, specifically the Norway stuff. I can't even begin to be like, oh, I knew like if we posted and we went for this market, of the semi trucks in Norway, like it would take off. Um, I just can't even, like, it would be wild for me to think that I had anything to do with that except for being a vessel and a way for him to move. Um, so I appreciate him doing such outlandish things in my book. And that went along with my plan, things that are just way out here. So I can't even try.
00:16:31
Speaker 2: You're like, that was definitely not me.
00:16:34
Speaker 1: Yeah, I couldn't have been. Couldn't have been.
00:16:36
Speaker 2: I think it's so cool for him to give you something as random as, Oh, yeah. So, like, just for perspective for people listening, like, growing up in Texas, doing country music, moving to Nashville, creating this dream, all the things. Like, Norway in that realm, that's random.
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Speaker 1: Oh, yeah, for sure. I never even thought about... I mean, I remember looking at the numbers and being like, oh, my gosh, it's, like, real. It's a real place you can fly to, you can drive around, and there's people that listen to country music. Like, never once on my radar at all.
00:17:05
Speaker 2: Shout out to God, man.
00:17:07
Speaker 1: Oh, he's the best. And... That creation over there is breathtaking. I mean, just being in Scandinavia, the way that the mountains are and the waters, it's so different than anything I've ever seen here. I mean, I've seen some videos of things in Canada that look kind of similar in some ways. But coming from Texas, I'm like, we had a whole bunch of flats. The whole bunch, big sunsets was our thing, not fjords and mountains and all of the things that they have. It's insane.
00:17:35
Speaker 2: I mean, even just the video of you getting baptized, like even just that is just breathtaking. And like, what a cool moment to like come out of the water, like a new person in such a new like space.
00:17:48
Speaker 1: Just a place I would have never gone to if I hadn't been there, especially the that little water place on the side of the road I can guarantee you I would have never been there if it wasn't divine intervention in some way but yeah it was gorgeous and when I came out of the water I was looking at a bunch of mountains but behind me was like some boats and some houses and it just I don't know so.
00:18:10
Speaker 2: Sweet such a cool moment to be able to like share with your band and your crew.
00:18:13
Speaker 1: Oh yeah I mean the people that I do so much life with and have had the highest highs and the lowest lows with they've been there for All of those things. I mean, the worst of you comes out at 3 a.m. in an airport. Oh, yeah. After a show. Let me tell you.
00:18:29
Speaker 2: Oh, yeah.
00:18:30
Speaker 1: That is my worst self. And they've loved me through it. And so, I mean, it also does take like a little bit of a new weight of responsibility even to them of the love I want to show them on the road and the grace I want to give them because of the grace that I've been shown for me and my,
you know, day-to-day life, not even just my work, just in all of my So it was so special to share that with them.
00:18:58
Speaker 2: Yeah, I bet. I want to talk about something you said earlier about, you know, this, this tension of like, do I even post this? Is this for me? Should I post this? And like that tension of like living for Jesus and, you know, Living out this career that's in the public eye. Yeah, absolutely. Some people are going to love it. Some people are going to hate it. Some people are going to say, like, yeah, girl, you did such a good job. So happy for you. Love, Jesus. Other people are going to be like, ugh, she's one of those. You know what I mean?
00:19:23
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah.
00:19:24
Speaker 2: Weighing that out as, like, somebody in the music industry who's trying to figure out, you know, an independent artist about, you know, releasing this album.
00:19:32
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah.
00:19:32
Speaker 2: And deciding, you know what, I'm just going to post this and let the Lord do what he wants to do with it. Talk about that wrestle a little bit, because I know that's such a real thing, not just in the music world, but in the just day to day. People are like, oh, I want to post about going to church, but I don't want to be that, that person.
00:19:49
Speaker 1: Yeah. You don't want to be, you know, two in people's faces or whatever. Um, honestly, the reason I ended up posting it is because I knew what was happening in my heart and I knew I needed to between me and Jesus. I was like, this is becoming so complicated. And, um, I was thinking about even down to, well, this could be a post that does well because I'm sure all my friends are going to comment on it. And I was like, well, that's evil.
00:20:17
Speaker 2: That's frightful.
00:20:18
Speaker 1: That's awful. So it was becoming just so messy to me. And then I started thinking about what baptism is. And it's supposed to be an outward expression. And what could be more outward than posting it online? And so truthfully, I prayed and was like, Lord, I'm going to do it. And if it's not supposed to, you know, get out there, Lord knows the algorithm will cap your post. Just go to absolutely no one, regardless of how many followers you have.
00:20:45
Speaker 2: It'll shove it down to the pit.
00:20:47
Speaker 1: It'll shove it down to the pit. So I was like, you know what? If it's supposed to get shoved on down to the pit, you just do that. I mean, I post songs or whatever all the time. My friends will be like, I didn't even see that. And they follow me and they would comment if they saw it. But just the algorithm is nuts. So.
00:21:03
Speaker 2: Let's fix this, Metta.
00:21:04
Speaker 1: Yeah, literally. Metta, let's do something about this. But I knew that if it wasn't supposed to get out there, I just prayed that it wouldn't. And that I would be able to step out in faith and encourage that the Lord would get it to the right people and keep it from anything it wasn't supposed
to do. And it was funny to me because it did... I mean, it got to a lot of my friends and stuff on Instagram. And I felt so much support and community. And honestly, I had so many fans of my music, right? reach out and say, that's right, my sister in Christ. And it created this whole new depth that I saw everything through of, yes, I am the one that, you know, put fake eyelashes on and my fake tan and got on stage. But like, we are sisters. We are, you know, sisters and brothers. And it was so sweet. And I'm so glad that happened. But over on TikTok, like it didn't do crazy anything number wise. And I felt like it wasn't about that It was about me pressing post and trusting the Lord for it to do whatever it was supposed to do and I feel like it did exactly what it was supposed to do and Laid a foundation before going into a time where I was gonna be posting about a lot of things but it's been crazy to even see like personal responsibility and conviction wise I mean in the world of marketing You're told that, you know, sex sells or controversy sells, drama sells. And it does. It really, really works. If you're willing to go there, like it will, you know, stir the pot. And I've had songs on this new album that I'm like, ooh, I've had some ideas that I'm like, we could. And I've like, you know, I posted about getting baptized. And I don't really feel good about posting that after posting that. So I haven't done a lot of them and done things that feel fun and feel life giving and feel like community building. But there's things I've stayed away from because I hit post on the baptism video. And I think that was something that the Lord had for me, too. So it's been cool to dance with that and see that and.
00:23:14
Speaker 2: Follow that. And that's just like it's daily temptations that you're going to deal with, not just in the music industry, but also in the real world.
00:23:22
Speaker 1: Oh, 100%.
00:23:23
Speaker 2: People deal with all the time, like, you know, whether or not I should click that website and whether or not I should look at that or, you know, whatever.
00:23:30
Speaker 1: Or talk about that. I mean, a big thing, too, that I've tried to lean into more recently is just trying to bring up Jesus naturally. And I don't know if you saw that quote that went around. I think it was maybe... I get them confused, but Jake Paul or Logan Paul. And it was like, if it really was so great, would more people talk about it? And I'm like, oh, that's so good. That's so true. And it is so great. And I was on a flight not too long ago and saw a girl bawling. I was in one of the aisle seats and she was on aisle seat, like maybe right here. And we were about to get off the plane and she was obviously just going through something really tough and very upset. And she was on the phone and obviously didn't know what was going on, but very upset. And I felt this call to go pray with her. And I am just not that girl. I hate praying out loud. I really struggle with it. I want to get better at it, but it's not something I've tackled. And it was a similar voice to what I heard when it was like, oh, you probably shouldn't post that. And because I knew that that did not come from God the first time, the fear of not praying with her, like, oh, well, what if you say the wrong thing? What if you, you know, rub her wrong? It... I felt like I could identify that that wasn't from God. And so then I knew I had to do it.
00:24:57
Speaker 2: And I was like, oh, no.
00:24:58
Speaker 1: But we're in the airport and everyone's just trying to get home or go to where they're going. And I went up and prayed with her at the baggage claim. I made a deal with God, which always goes well, right? But I was like, if she's at the baggage claim, if she checked a bag, I'll go pray with her. And, of course, she did. So I was like, great, cool. You're like, cool, cool, cool, cool.
00:25:18
Speaker 2: Let's do this. Yeah, I was like, all right. So....
00:25:21
Speaker 1: I walked up to her and, uh, I was like, hi, I, you know, heard you were kind of upset on the plane. I just want to make sure everything's okay. And like, wanted to ask if I could pray with you. And, uh, she actually, she was like, that would actually make me really uncomfortable. And I was like, okay, well, so then I'm sitting there and I'm like, what is this for? But, and I just told her, I was like, well, I'm going to be praying for you even if I can't pray with you. And I hope everything's okay. Um, and just know that, you know, I got her name and kind of got some details on what was going on and so that I would be praying for them by name and stuff. And It's one of those moments where I had to trust that the Lord was going to use that as a seed in some way. Or maybe it was just as much for me as it was for her. And it's just not about the outcome. It's about the stepping out in faith.
00:26:03
Speaker 2: It's saying yes. Yeah. He's looking for your yes. And I think it's so important that you said yes.
00:26:08
Speaker 1: Yeah, it was definitely awkward. But I mean, I think that the Lord can use much more complex and weird situations than that. Right.
00:26:20
Speaker 2: Something similar happened to me maybe a couple months ago. I was speaking at this little conference in North Carolina, one of my friend's little get-togethers that she had. Fun. And I had a best friend that was supposed to come on this trip with me.
00:26:33
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:26:33
Speaker 2: And at the last minute, I was going alone, right? And so we're kind of like in the middle of– And I was in this big, beautiful tree house alone. And I was just like, okay, this is going to be great. Mom's weekend away with no children. I'm going to get lots of solo relaxing time. Self-help, self-care. So I end up the next morning just waking up late. sleeping in, which was awesome. And I was just like, let me just Google around here where there's some where to eat. So I find this place and I just drive
over there. I bring my Bible and my journal with me and I'm like, I'm just going to have some breakfast by myself and read my Bible.
00:27:09
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:27:10
Speaker 2: Devotional.
00:27:10
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:27:11
Speaker 2: And so I'm sitting there and I'm, you know, writing in my journal, ordered my food and the Lord's like, you need to write that girl a note. And I was like, My waitress? Right, who? Yeah, my waitress. Who, what girl? And so, and I have this young, sweet waitress. She was so, so kind. And I was just like, okay, well, what is it supposed to say? He was like, nothing. Didn't say anything. So I just start writing. I'm like, hey, girl.
00:27:36
Speaker 1: You know, I don't know what you're going through.
00:27:39
Speaker 2: And I just start writing her this note. And funny enough, the night before, when I checked into this little, like, retreat place. Yeah. There was a, like, welcome basket from my friend. And in there was, like, an envelope of money. And I was just, like, I was not prepared to get paid for this. Okay.
00:27:56
Speaker 1: Wow.
00:27:56
Speaker 2: We love that. Thank you. That's so generous and kind of you. But I texted her and I was, like, why did you give me this money? And she was just, like, I don't know. The Holy Spirit told me to give it to you. And I was just, like, okay. And so I'm sitting there at breakfast. And the Holy Spirit, like, just puts this, like, money like in my mind and I was just like for this girl okay so I'm gonna give this money to this girl wow so I'm my breakfast myself it was like 16 bucks right right yeah so I have this like wad of cash and I'm like ripping this page out of my binder and I'm like folding it up and I like give it to this girl and I was like hey this is for you when I tell you like she you know she walked away and like reads it, but she goes around the corner, like 15 seconds later, this girl barreling around the corner, she comes up to my table. And I mean, it's a packed place, crying her eyes out. And she gives me the biggest hug. And she was just like, you have no idea. Oh, wow. And I was just like, I don't sister. What is going on? And she was just like, I've been going through some really tough stuff and she was like, sparing you the details, but I have friends that are believers and they keep telling me to pray about it.
00:29:02
Speaker 1: Wow.
00:29:03
Speaker 2: And I was just like, okay, well, he hears you. And she goes, I know. And like holds up my note. Oh, I have chills. And she was just like, you have no idea. This is confirmation that he hears me. So like, I'm like, you literally took me out of Nashville to this random place in North Carolina.
00:29:19
Speaker 1: To hand deliver.
00:29:20
Speaker 2: To this crazy breakfast that I've never even planned. To hand deliver a note to somebody to prove to her that you're listening. I'm like, who am I to use as a vessel? Yeah. Same for you. Like that girl's going to go like you have no idea the conversation she's having now because you stopped her at an airport and we're like, hey, I'm going to pray for you.
00:29:38
Speaker 1: I love that.
00:29:38
Speaker 2: And it's like, I can't wait to get to heaven one day and the people that will come up to you and say, I know Jesus because of you and you have no idea. I love that. You know?
00:29:49
Speaker 1: I know. I can't wait to see, like, how all the dots connect. That's so crazy.
00:29:54
Speaker 2: Yeah.
00:29:54
Speaker 1: Yeah, all the way in North Carolina.
00:29:56
Speaker 2: And it's just funny because it's like God just looking for your yes. And you're not as uncomfortable as it is. I'm, like, writing this handwritten note. I'm like, this girl's about the thing. I'm so weird.
00:30:05
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:30:06
Speaker 2: And God's like, wait a second, just watch.
00:30:07
Speaker 1: Yeah, just watch. Truly.
00:30:09
Speaker 2: And this happens to my husband all the time. Really? Where he gets this like tug on his heartstrings. And it's so funny because we always go to Texas Roadhouse. It's my daughter's favorite place.
00:30:17
Speaker 1: I mean, understandable.
00:30:18
Speaker 2: So he's always like, he pretends that Texas Roadhouse is his ministry because like anytime we go, he'll be like, We'll be like walking out and he'll be like, be right back. And I'm like, okay. You're thinking he's going to the bathroom or something?
00:30:31
Speaker 1: Nope.
00:30:31
Speaker 2: There was a guy sitting by himself. It's always somebody sitting by themselves. Wow. And he slides into the booth and he's just like, hey, man, how are you? My name's Andrew. Can I pray for you? And like, or pay for your dinner or something?
00:30:43
Speaker 1: Wow.
00:30:43
Speaker 2: And he's just like. He'll fight it the whole time. He'll be like, I don't know. He's going to think I'm weird. But it's happened like four or five times.
00:30:51
Speaker 1: Really?
00:30:51
Speaker 2: And he's just like, is Texas Roadhouse my ministry spot?
00:30:54
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's his spot. His home base. You know what, though? It's encouraging a little bit to hear that he still fights with it. Even though he's probably had great experiences to where it's like left an impression. He's so glad he did it. It's not something that necessarily becomes easier overnight. Girl, no. And it's... it's wild, like just how you would think you would get used to it and then it would be easy. And, you know, you're used to walking out to people and used to the awkwardness and we're just not. It is.
00:31:25
Speaker 2: It's like, it's one of those awkward things where you're like, I don't know if this person's a serial killer. I don't know if this person is in a bad mood or is going to try and find me after this.
00:31:35
Speaker 1: Seriously. Have I started a chain of events? Yes.
00:31:38
Speaker 2: But yeah, it's those crazy lies from the enemy that try to get you from just, like you said, it doesn't even have to come, something might not
come out of it. Like there was this one guy, my husband was like, yeah, he was just like, this is kind of weird, dude. And he was just like, yeah, I agree. It is kind of weird. But like a little bit. I just want you to know that Jesus loves you and like your meals taken care of. And then like he just leaves. And he was just like, that was really awkward. But like, I don't know. God's going to do something.
00:32:02
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah. You just say the yes. Like you said.
00:32:05
Speaker 2: Crazy. Oh, man. Texas Roadhouse Ministry.
00:32:09
Speaker 1: Love that.
00:32:09
Speaker 2: I'll take a sponsorship whenever you're. Absolutely.
00:32:11
Speaker 1: The honey butter rolls. The rolls are so good.
00:32:16
Speaker 2: I should have a bowl of Texas Roadhouse rolls every episode.
00:32:20
Speaker 1: Bring the Texas Roadhouse here. Absolutely. I mean, that would be the most dangerous thing for me.
00:32:26
Speaker 2: We could take communion with Roadhouse rolls.
00:32:29
Speaker 1: Yes, I would do it. I mean, in the name of Jesus. Yes, in the name of the Lord, yes.
00:32:34
Speaker 2: Oh my goodness, I love this. I feel like, you know, in a world where Your career is just measured on likes, views, comments, streams, all the things. And that telling you what your worth is versus, you know, this relationship with the Lord where he's like, no, I actually determined your worth. You know, keeping those from becoming stuff that like fights each other, that day-to-day battle that you faced. Walk us through some of those moments because I feel like it's such a real thing in this world where everybody's like, oh, I only got four likes on that Instagram post.
00:33:06
Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely.
00:33:07
Speaker 2: What the heck?
00:33:08
Speaker 1: Absolutely. Especially with trial reels. I've had some numbers I ain't seen in a minute. I mean, luckily, I feel like I've had a lot of people who have really supported me. And posts will do, you know, even when they don't do great, it's not like they do that bad. But on trial reels, it is an awakening. I'm like, oh, my Lord. Nobody wants to see me? What? Not a soul. But that's definitely something that I fight every single day. And especially because I am so proud of the music that I make and the posts that I create. I spend so much time coming up with ideas and setting the text for that many amount of seconds to go away right when I do this. And I watch it back and I'm like, man, I love that. I think this should be in the world. And I put it out and the Lord just, I mean, I go back to, I just feel like he loves me too much to let it happen in a way that I could take credit for it.
00:34:00
Speaker 2: Yeah.
00:34:00
Speaker 1: So definitely, I mean, honestly, this week with the album coming out, trying to have my hands open so much and something that I've told myself so much over the last year is that the Lord loves me more as a daughter than he loves me as a singer, than he loves me as a songwriter, than he
loves me as a vessel, as anything. He loves me as a daughter. And me sitting in my room alone with my Bible open is where I'm going to be worth My worth is never more than right there. And so the lies from the world and the enemy and the things I tell myself, it is something I fight every single day. But I think everybody fights it in some way. And the more that people know that even when you get baptized in the fjord or go to church or are talking on a Christian-based podcast and faith-based stuff, that never goes away. I mean, the devil just works hard. Like he is, he will do anything he can. And luckily we know who wins in the end, but you got to try to win every day.
00:35:11
Speaker 2: It's a lot. It's a lot. I love that you said that. And I want to just kind of like direct to who's watching and who is listening right now, because that was just such a beautiful thing that you said, like the Lord loves you more than you're, you as an employee or as an artist or as a friend or as a father or a mother or, you know, whatever you're, wherever you are in life, like the Lord loves you more than that. He loves you as a daughter, as a son. Yeah. And he loves you more that way than all these accolades that you're trying to produce and you're trying to attain. Like, at the end of the day, none of that matters. Like your job status is not going to get you into heaven.
00:35:50
Speaker 1: No.
00:35:51
Speaker 2: How much money you make is not going to get you into heaven.
00:35:53
Speaker 1: No.
00:35:53
Speaker 2: How successful that book you wrote is not going to get you into heaven. Like there's so many things that you could fill in that blank with. And I love that you said that because it's so true. Like, I love you more as a daughter. Yeah.
00:36:03
Speaker 1: And it's been something that I feel like he has put on my heart, like for me to hold on to. And I have gripped. I feel like I know for being as type A as I said I am, I picked the least type A business possible.
00:36:18
Speaker 2: Totally.
00:36:19
Speaker 1: The most unknown. Like I would thrive in corporate America. Like just knowing exactly what to do and when to get there and when to be done and how to turn it off. Yeah. Oh, I would.
00:36:28
Speaker 2: What a life.
00:36:29
Speaker 1: There's a version of me that just eats it up. But I think it's purposeful that the Lord did not give me that. And he put something in my life to where I am forced to hold it like this. But to have... words and phrases of truth biblically or things that I feel like he's given me that I can grip onto. It's meant everything to me. And like you said, like, no, as an employee, that doesn't get you into heaven, but it is where the Lord placed you to get to love on people. And I feel like the Lord has told me to just love and to see. And from on stage, you know, I get such a unique perspective. Everybody's looking this way and I get to look out. And to get to truly try to see people when they don't think anyone's
watching, I think that's such an awesome opportunity that I'm given. And I love the idea of trying to crush it at that just as much as I'm trying to sing the right notes or make sure I say the right words. It's, I mean, the Lord will use us in so many different ways.
00:37:33
Speaker 2: Girl, he will. And just to encourage you as like a friend across the table, like, The fact that you're thinking in this mindset and the fact that like you're realizing these things and the fact that you said yes and were bold to say like, this is who I am. I came out of this water new and now my convictions are different. Like, listen to those. There's going to be people in the industry. There's going to be people in the world that do say like, you know what, if you just wear a really low cut shirt and did this and did all these things. Yeah.
00:38:01
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:38:01
Speaker 2: OK, then then I would be in charge of that. Right. Right.
00:38:05
Speaker 1: Right.
00:38:05
Speaker 2: Then that would that would be me and my pride in me getting, you know, what I need. But like just being bold in who you are and like like you said, you just say yes when God says to say yes.
00:38:16
Speaker 1: Like, yeah.
00:38:18
Speaker 2: It's so easy to get caught up in this world about like the success, the money, the numbers, the likes, all the things, but like none of that's going to get you into heaven.
00:38:27
Speaker 1: No. And I appreciate that so much. Like just sister to sister. Um, and I think another cool thing I get to show too, is that you can prance around on stage and write sassy songs and wear cute outfits and do whatever. Um, and also love Jesus. Like it's not an either or. Um, so I think that's a fun thing that I get to try to walk in the best that I can and knowing that I'm going to mess up and that I'll get to, you know, show what, you know, having grace for yourself and that the Lord has grace for you looks like too. I mean, I, I get in my head more than anybody and I am hard on myself all the time. And I, The Lord loves me so much and he tries to he works on me every day. Right.
00:39:10
Speaker 2: And that's just the thing is like there's nothing wrong with sassy music. There's nothing wrong with having a little bit of fun, you know, and all these things. But it's just like people really need to learn grace and like the fact that like we're all going to mess up.
00:39:22
Speaker 1: Absolutely.
00:39:23
Speaker 2: Catch me after church in some in some uh, some traffic on a Sunday girl. Goodbye. We lose, you know, we, we lose the battle all the time. We struggle daily to like make the right decisions. And that's just the beauty of being a human. Like we're not going to be perfect. The only perfect human to walk this earth was Jesus.
00:39:41
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:39:42
Speaker 2: And like we're newsflash. Nobody's ever going to be perfect again. So yeah, exactly. If you want to yell at me for making a mistake, let's, Turn the camera towards you, Karen.
Oh, yeah. Precisely. Let's see how your life is going because none of us are doing it right. Yeah, no.
00:39:57
Speaker 1: And you know what? I've seen this image a few times, but they said it at Crosspoint a few weeks ago where they were talking about building something. It was a dad building something. Maybe it was like a shed. We'll go with shed. And he was talking about how he let his kids help him and like nail in some nails. And they didn't know what they were doing. They, you know, nailed them in sideways. He had to re-nail around it to make sure that the nail actually would work. But he talked about how much the Lord loves to use us. Like we love doing something with our kids or with our friends. And it's the community and the aspect of like, no, we're not going to be perfect. But he loves using us anyways. And I think that's been one of the most beautiful pictures of us being so flawed and him enjoying the way that we do things our own way and how he can make that be whatever needs to happen for the kingdom.
00:40:49
Speaker 2: When you say that, it just reminds me of like cooking with my five-year-old.
00:40:52
Speaker 1: I bet it's messy.
00:40:53
Speaker 2: She loves to help mommy make bread. And it is so frustrating sometimes because it's like, okay, the flour goes in this bowl.
00:41:02
Speaker 1: Right.
00:41:02
Speaker 2: And then half of the flour is on the floor. And you're like, well, I don't even know what measurement that was now. So now I have to figure it out. But it's just like, what a cool picture of like God saying like, here's the recipe.
00:41:12
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:41:13
Speaker 2: And us throwing in a little dash of something that we, or missing the bowl a little bit. Yeah. And him saying, you know what? It's going to work out. I'm still going to make this delicious. Absolutely. I'm still going to make this recipe amazing. And, like, what a picture of, like, how God uses us every single day.
00:41:27
Speaker 1: 100%.
00:41:29
Speaker 2: Ugh, you're speaking to my mama heart over here. Aw, well, okay.
00:41:32
Speaker 1: Have you gotten on the sourdough train?
00:41:34
Speaker 2: Yeah, girl, that's what, sourdough bread.
00:41:35
Speaker 1: I fed my starter last night.
00:41:37
Speaker 2: Are you baking today?
00:41:38
Speaker 1: You know, I'm trying to make sure my starter doesn't die while it's in the fridge for a long time while I'm not baking.
00:41:45
Speaker 2: Listen, if you need sourdough tips, I'm your girl.
00:41:47
Speaker 1: Really?
00:41:47
Speaker 2: I got you, yes.
00:41:48
Speaker 1: Okay, good to know because I have your number now. Yes. I'll be like, why does it look like this?
00:41:51
Speaker 2: I'll be like, you need... Probably, you need a.
00:41:55
Speaker 1: You're probably going to be like, you need to throw that away and come get more starter from me.
00:41:57
Speaker 2: No, you just need to feed your starter. She needs to be healthy.
00:42:01
Speaker 1: I know. I'm trying to get her healthy
right now. She's been in the fridge for like two weeks.
00:42:04
Speaker 2: That's okay.
00:42:05
Speaker 1: But.
00:42:05
Speaker 2: Two weeks is fine.
00:42:06
Speaker 1: Okay, well, luckily she's out on the counter now. She's getting fed. We're getting back to life.
00:42:11
Speaker 2: This is a sourdough tip for anybody who needs to watch. Pink mold. Black is okay. So in the fridge, you know, sometimes it gets a little film on the top. Pink is bad. Black is okay.
00:42:23
Speaker 1: I've never seen pink before.
00:42:24
Speaker 2: You don't want to see pink. Well, pink is just like, it doesn't happen. If you leave it on the counter a lot.
00:42:30
Speaker 1: You get pink.
00:42:31
Speaker 2: Oh, okay. In the fridge, if you leave your starter in there, the black is just, they call it hooch. Just stir it in. Makes it a little more tangy. Yeah, it's good for it.
00:42:39
Speaker 3: Yeah, you know.
00:42:41
Speaker 1: Everyone needs a little tank.
00:42:41
Speaker 2: So just in case you needed a little sourdough tip. Yeah.
00:42:44
Speaker 1: No, that's good to know because I got out of the fridge and I was looking. I'm like, okay. I just like stirred up. I'm like, it's never happened.
00:42:51
Speaker 2: Just let it come to room temperature, then feed it, and then you're good. That's a good tip too. And sometimes you got to feed it a couple of times to get it back to life. Yeah.
00:42:57
Speaker 1: The first feed was rough. I was like, girl. I was like, she ain't doing nothing.
00:43:01
Speaker 2: We're losing our entire audience. You know that like sourdough mouth?
00:43:04
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:43:04
Speaker 2: No.
00:43:05
Speaker 1: It's the bread of life, you know.
00:43:08
Speaker 2: Anyway, I've got a really good sourdough sandwich bread recipe if you need it.
00:43:10
Speaker 1: Oh, yes, please. Oh, send. I've never done that.
00:43:13
Speaker 2: You add honey and olive oil to it.
00:43:14
Speaker 1: Anyway. Oh, yum.
00:43:16
Speaker 2: Let's talk about here at the end of the podcast. I'd love to pray for our guests in just the season of life that you're in. What can we specifically pray for you for?
00:43:24
Speaker 1: You know what? I think surrender is a big one. And just trusting that the Lord will. will use me and use the music how he can. And I don't need to worry about it.
00:43:33
Speaker 2: You sure don't, girl. Yeah. And we will because we're human. We'll worry about it. We just always will. But yeah, surrender is huge. So I'll pray us out.
00:43:41
Speaker 1: Oh, thank you so much.
00:43:42
Speaker 2: Heavenly Father, Lord, we just say thank you for this conversation. Surrender is such a big word, Lord, but you know how to use it properly, God. And we just ask you to help Aaron to surrender in this season. this season of new music, this season of just like this brand new chapter of being made new. God, we just thank you for that freshness, for boldness, for her yes to just publicly live for you, God. And God, we just pray over her convictions in this season, that you would just continue to speak through her and to her, God, that you would just, in this season, that she would just fully trust and rely on you, that she truly would live with her hands open, asking you to do what only you can do, open up. every door that no man can shut, God, and just being okay with the no's, being okay with the yes's, and just fully surrendering in this next season as she walks through lots and lots of new, God. But we just say thank you in your heavenly name we pray. Amen.
00:44:37
Speaker 1: Amen. Amen.