अनुलिपि 🔗
speaker-0: Hi there, I'm Pastor Toot Whitley and this is Conversion Therapy, a podcast where I help lost lambs back to the heterosexual pasture. As you may know, I myself am a reformed homosexual. In fact, I used to engage in doctor-patient role play with a power bottom named Pepper, who I diagnosed with blowvid nine pen. Of course, the only cure for that was, you guessed it, nine penes. Now the PhD I focus on is Saint Paul's Proud and Happy Deacon program. So if I can get straight, so can you, and so can our guest. Please open your hearts to gay Nick Shepherd. Hi there, Nick. It's so nice to have you on. It's been a long journey to get you on here. There was some resistance at first.
speaker-1: Hi. It's so nice to be on too. Thank you for having me. Yes. ⁓ I mean just the geographical distance at first because I am based in Hong Kong. Yeah. And then the like emotional struggles just because ⁓ culturally Hong Kong is so different.
speaker-0: Yeah, the emotional distance was almost a w a wider gap to sort of understand than the physical distance, but both definitely posed an issue. So Nick, on a scale of Michelle Visage to the hilarious Ross Matthews, how gay would you say you are?
speaker-1: I would unfortunately say I'm probably closer to a style superstar Carson Gresley.
speaker-0: That's a tough cross to bear. Yeah. That feels like a difficult thing to understand.
speaker-1: It feels like it exists off the graph, kind of beyond the I feel like my gayness is beyond the binary, which is hard. I know. ⁓ it just feels like a gradu a matriculation. Mm-hmm. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Which is
speaker-0: Beyond the binary. That's the gayest place a gay person can be That's okay, we're gonna help you out with that today. I also w understand that you grew up in Las Vegas. Do you think your early exposure or proximity to Cirque du Soleil contributed to your homosexuality?
speaker-1: Well, I remember the acrobats being in skimpy little outfits, but that felt a little bit less light me up, dress me down than the things that they were physically doing with their bodies. And I think I started to notice that I was getting titillated more when they were surpassing the boundaries of what a human being could do, which is kind of how the fisting started.
speaker-0: We're jumping right in, aren't we? So it wasn't so much the bulge, it was being enthralled that they could do flips and swing from a bar. There is something very homosexual about that, yes.
speaker-1: Yeah. Right. But God teaches us to just accept what is and accept what isn't and not push past our limitations.
speaker-0: Absolutely and you know, God said humans supposed to walk on two legs, walk on the ground, walk first thing he said when he was making us and for that reason I do actually think that, you know, humans defying laws of gravity, ⁓ you know, pushing past boundaries that we were made in God's image to do. No, that ain't right. That's close to homosexual behavior, I'd say. Hopefully we can change you for good.
speaker-1: That's a ⁓ That's a pot of wicked.
speaker-0: What are you most looking forward to about being straight, do you think?
speaker-1: I think I'm excited to go back and re-watch the and twins commercials. So there was a beer company that did a big campaign that was about all the fun things you could do with beer, and every couple of seconds it would cut to and twins and it would show a sexy pair of female twins. And it never really I couldn't didn't get it. I was like, I guess twins are I loved Mary Kate and Ashley, so I understood the twins.
speaker-0: And can you explain what that is? Yeah.
speaker-1: Yeah yeah yeah yeah. I understood why twins could be exciting, but it wasn't ever sexual. I'm excited for that commercial to be sexual to me.
speaker-0: Right, to sort of revisit the and twins of it all. Yes. It's a very big part of heterosexuality. I'm glad you're ready to open your heart to ⁓ yep, fucking twins, sucking and fucking twins, fingering twins, licking, biting, giving hickeys to blowing ass of twins.
speaker-1: Fucking twins. When you blow ass to twins Sorry, I'm gonna sorry. When you blow ass to twins, do you think that you should do it the same amount for each one?
speaker-0: That's okay. Yeah, I think, you know, if you start to show favoritism towards one twin over another, that's when trouble really starts breaking. Of this, you know, interview portion, I'm curious, what do you think will be the hardest thing to let go of about being gay? To say goodbye to.
speaker-1: Right. ⁓ I think it's gonna be hard to say goodbye to a lot of my eating habits. ⁓ yeah. I think there's I've just gotten really in touch with the bottom friendly diet that went viral in 2021. Mm-hmm. ⁓ it got a lot of lash back, but it's really worked for me. I know as a straight man I'm gonna have to have kind of a closer relationship with diarrhea and leaving it just kind of on the cheeks.
speaker-0: Leaving on the cheeks, leaving on the seat, leaving in the bowl. In fact it's sort of, you know, ⁓ someone some might say the the straight man friendly diet is not so much about what you eat, it's where you put it. Yeah. Once it's come out the other end.
speaker-1: Yeah. Or or leave it even. Or leave it. Letting nature take its course and just not again pushing past what God would want, which is shit on my ass.
speaker-0: Shit on my ass. Absolutely. Okay, you know what? I will say so far it seems like we're headed in a good direction. These are some difficult things to surpass, but they're certainly surpassable. So to get an idea of how far you've strayed from God's light, we're gonna do a couple exercises, okay. So the first exercise is called Five Things. I'll give you a category, and you'll give the first five examples of things in that category that come to mind.
speaker-1: ⁓ good.
speaker-0: So if the category is things you might find in church, I might say pews, crosses, bag of you Pews, you know what you sit on?
speaker-1: Yes. Use that on
Load full transcript
pubes at the church?
speaker-0: Hughes, son. P E W S No. P E.
speaker-1: W B S.
speaker-0: S. Okay. You're saying pew? No, you're saying pew.
speaker-1: You're saying pubes. I think you're saying pubes. Tooth you sent me down here to talk about pubes and I want to talk about getting straight.
speaker-0: Okay. I said Pew's, the benches that she sit on. My name is Two, not Two.
speaker-1: The benches that I sit on.
speaker-0: I can already tell we might have some difficulty with this exercise, but I'm gonna push forward regardless. Five foods you love to eat.
speaker-1: Okay, tooth. S. This just seems top of mind.
speaker-0: Okay, yeah, whatever, it's sort of stream of consciousness. We'll just keep moving forward. One.
speaker-1: Okay, the other twins ask. Wait.
speaker-0: Two
speaker-1: The third to win the triplets ass.
speaker-0: Three.
speaker-1: Cottage cheese. Cottage cheese out of the fourth twin's ass.
speaker-0: Or Five. Okay. The r you we really started out well at the beginning. Seems like we're getting worse. That's okay. We're gonna move we're gonna do another one. You have you have chance to
speaker-1: ⁓ I'm sorry. Four twins are called a quartet.
speaker-0: They're quadruplets. A quartet is the most gay answer you could have given. That's sort of how you might refer to four men who sing to
speaker-1: Yeah, they're
speaker-0: So you were picturing the Jersey boys when you were saying eat cottage cheese out of their ass?
speaker-1: Yeah, I saw the Jersey Boys as a kid and I was just fixated on wanting to eat cottage cheese out of their ass. The smallest one most
speaker-0: But we gotta get our children out of Vegas. Things are happening in there that God wouldn't even shine a light.
speaker-1: Do a ninety minute version of Jersey Boys.
speaker-0: So you're saying it's convenient to convenient amount of time.
speaker-1: Watch it over and over and over again. Without it taking as much time as going to Broadway, watching the two hour version with an intermission.
speaker-0: W you have a knowledge of the length of Broadway shows, which really shows when we have our work cut out f for us today. Of course. Okay. Five places to go on a Friday night.
speaker-1: ⁓ my god. Okay. So five places to go on a Friday night. Chili's one. Ruby Tuesdays. Two. Applebees. Three. The Olive Garden. Four. The quadruplets house.
speaker-0: You know okay. Well we're improving and that's what I'm looking for. I can I can work with that. Okay. Five people you don't wanna find in your bedroom.
speaker-1: I wouldn't want to find the cops in my bedroom. And unless
speaker-0: Why? Okay, keep going.
speaker-1: I probably wouldn't want to find Glenne Maxwell in my bedroom again. I wouldn't want to find probably the Elizabeth Holmes in my bedroom again. Three. I would have a tough time with Jen Shaw being in my bedroom again. Four. I would have a really hard time with having Ryan Secrets in my bedroom for the first time. Given how much talking we've been doing online.
speaker-0: Okay, five. You're very familiar with this group of people. That's sort of jarring to me, but that's fine. Okay, how about this one? This is good. This is good. Five qualities your ideal wife has.
speaker-1: ⁓ my god, okay. Big arms. Chiseled abs. Five o'clock shadow. Three bullet. Bullet.
speaker-0: One Okay, three What was four? What was the next one? Okay, four.
speaker-1: Mustache. Like you know the five o'clock shadow is like we shave here, but it kind of just keeps growing in. The mustache we don't touch.
speaker-0: It seems to me that you're describing someone who might be found in a child.
speaker-1: Septum ring. Did you say white tank top?
speaker-0: on the spectrum of gender. I I was hoping for more traditional female values. At first I thought maybe you were going for like a Jillian Michaels type, which I understand. But then you sort of swung into like a whatever they call it, transgender territory. which we don't really we don't really support that.
speaker-1: Yeah. Two.
speaker-0: ⁓ we're not doing that. We're trying to get you more involved with ⁓ you know, a woman who who's going to church regularly, you know, a woman who hasn't been listening to indigo girls. Okay. Indigo girls.
speaker-1: Indica girls? It's a f it's that's
speaker-0: Probably good you don't know. It's pretty gay band from what I hear. Okay, let's do this last one. Five men who are going to hell.
speaker-1: ⁓ Okay. Five men that are going to hell. Mm-hmm. Lance Bass. Joey Fatone. Two. Justin Timberlake.
speaker-0: Yeah. Three.
speaker-1: I'm gonna struggle here. Mm-hmm. Chris. ⁓ from NSYN of course Mauricio Kyle Richard's husband. Ex husband, thank you.
speaker-0: Okay, we're gonna move on to the next exercise. We're gonna play a game called Finish This Bible Quote. So I'm gonna say the beginning of a famous Bible quote, and you will finish it the best that you can. Okay? I don't expect you to know all of these. I know you're still a beginner, so don't worry about that. But just answer them how you think they might end. Okay. Do to others as you would have them.
speaker-1: All right. I like counting. How are you gonna love someone else?
speaker-0: Okay, feels well Yeah, that's sort of I guess sure. We're sort of on the way. ⁓ you're getting nervous. I can see your eyebrows have knit together. ⁓ so that's not the end of the quote. The end is
speaker-1: I'm just trying to see where I went wrong. Can I get an Amen?
speaker-0: Nope. ⁓ it's due to
speaker-1: Let the music play.
speaker-0: So it's none of those. ⁓ but you're y you had the right spirit. I can tell that you're trying your best, and I do appreciate that. So next quote. Everything is possible for one who
speaker-1: Two
speaker-0: Everything is possible for one
speaker-1: Who number two? Who the number two?
speaker-0: I'm sorry, do you wanna take that?
speaker-1: Yeah, I'm sorry, can I really quick?
speaker-0: No problem. As long as who is it?
speaker-1: Ben Axelrad texts me about his pilot class. I th want to take it. I'm d nervous about exploring that side of my creativity because every time I start writing it ends up getting really graphic and sexual. Okay. And it's too good. Yeah.
speaker-0: Okay. Yeah. ⁓ it's so good that it's graphic and sexual. I mean I could see you perhaps being anxious over the fact that you would be riding, you know, lascivious content. I just want to remind you that you are you just your foot's sort of on the tripod and just sort of rattling it around. Yep. It's toot. Okay, next quote. I can do all things through Christ who
speaker-1: Trying to be close to you tooth. Is that
speaker-0: I can do all things through Christ.
speaker-1: Who is that? I can do all things through Christ. Who is that?
speaker-0: Okay, so that's a question here you think in the Bible there's a question about who Christ
speaker-1: A good piece of text should leave you with more questions than answers.
speaker-0: So you've taken the pilot class?
speaker-1: I need to take it a third time, I keep getting kicked out.
speaker-0: Okay. So the end of the quote is strengthens me and that's Philippians four thirteen.
speaker-1: Who is that who strengthens me?
speaker-0: I can do all things through c
speaker-1: Christ. Asked and answered.
speaker-0: I mean you're getting the point of the th the quote, so that's okay. The next quote is Dear friends, since God loved us that much, we surely ought to
speaker-1: Finish this letter. Love Nick.
speaker-0: Okay, so these are quotes that have existed in the Bible for hundreds of years. And you said love Nick at the end, like you were writing a letter.
speaker-1: Well it's how does it start?
speaker-0: The quote or the letter? Okay, so the end of the quote is love each other. Dear friends.
speaker-1: Yes. How does the quote start? D'Ar. Rest of the quote?
speaker-0: No, it's not it's not like
speaker-1: Dear friends And then there's the letter I gotta finish writing this letter. Love Nick.
speaker-0: It's like y friends who are dear to you.
speaker-1: Right. Like you the ones you would write a letter to.
speaker-0: Okay, we're gonna move to the next quote. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is
speaker-1: Dunn had herses.
speaker-0: God is love. Huh. Everybody say love.
speaker-1: Everybody say love. Can I get like eight men up in here?
speaker-0: Alright. But it's very clear we have our work cut out for us. So I'm gonna bring in a specialist ⁓ to really make sure we nail down these changes. I've invited a masculinity expert named Skid Beef. So when we come back, we'll be working with Skid. Hey man, sorry I'm late. I had a raw meat luncheon with the Men's Rights Activist Society at ⁓ the Magic Castle, but I'm here now.
speaker-1: It's all good. I had a great time with Tooth. I'm excited to talk with you. Yeah. Skid. Skid beep.
speaker-0: Beef, that's my name. Skin beef? Like a side of beef. Like beef. Not beep. Beef. Like ⁓ when you go hunting in the woods, you kill deer, skin the
side. Beef.
speaker-1: I'm sorry, I'm from Hong Kong so I've never
speaker-0: That's okay. That's alright. Just call me Skid. Skid. Yep. So I heard that you're struggling with a couple things. Giving up a homosexual life. Yeah, what things are you feeling most anxious about moving into this, you know, masculinization portion?
speaker-1: Skeed. Okay. Skeed. It's been hard. I have a lot of wigs. I don't want to get rid of the wigs. Okay.
speaker-0: So you gotta find a way to repurpose those wigs then, I guess.
speaker-1: Yeah. I never thought of doing a different thing with the wigs.
speaker-0: Yeah, you shouldn't be wearing ⁓ Could make your wife wear ⁓ maybe. Girlfriend wear ⁓ Okay, but trust me, by the end of this experience you will. It's not gonna be me. We're gonna find someone for you. But, you know, we're gonna work on a couple things now to help guide you in the right direction. I do believe that we're gonna be successful today, so don't worry too much about that. A as I'm sure you're aware, one way you can always tell a guy is homosexual is
speaker-1: Boy for girlfriend. You're gonna be my wife and my girlfriend. Okay. He wants to have sex with you. Sure. I don't see why not. I don't see anything wrong with the way you look. There's no reason a guy wouldn't want to have sex with you. Why are you saying that?
speaker-0: He wants to have sex with me? Okay, I guess that is That's a very kind thing to say. That's not what I'm s I'm not saying I wanna have s you said that. You Okay. I am he I'm a straight man. I'm married with a wife. Don't rule your eyes.
speaker-1: Yeah.
speaker-0: You're rolling them a bunch. We're focused. That's not That's not what we're here to focus on today, okay?
speaker-1: Who's not having sex with you? I'm gonna take you to Rocco's and we're gonna have a function.
speaker-0: I don't want to have sex with a man. What I was saying, okay, the end of my sentence that you said rudely cut off was you can always tell a guy is homosexual by his voice, okay? It's too happy and it's too fulfilled sounding when you're a homosexual. A real man doesn't have those qualities. Okay. So I'm gonna work with you on masculinizing your voice. This one's a little tough, so you know Feel free to give it more than one try if you need to work up to it. Okay. So the first step is you cannot have intonation. A man should never sound too interested. Okay? You sound more powerful when you're disinterested. So I'm gonna hand you my clipboard.
speaker-1: What about Usher? Intonation's like a major Usher Well Usher is kind of de waist deep and neck deep and pussy. Do you agree? Yeah, okay. Usher has one of the most thorough masteries of intonation of probably anybody. So what's T?
speaker-0: Okay. What the hell is tea? What's that?
speaker-1: What's tea? What's tea? What's tea?
speaker-0: You're asking me? Okay. You're not a international pop star, okay? So we're not gonna have to worry about that. I'm gonna give you a phrase and I need you to read this phrase with as little intonation as you can possibly muster, okay? It's gonna be that first one right there.
speaker-1: Yeah, what's T. Okay. I was rooting for you, we were all rooting for you. How dare you? See that we're all
speaker-0: You were doing really good up until the end.
speaker-1: Sorry. It didn't feel like me until the end.
speaker-0: Mm. And that's exactly what we're working on. If I do my job right, you'll leave here not feeling like yourself at all. That's the
speaker-1: ⁓ okay. Do you understand? Well, I feel like Usher. Why it?
speaker-0: No. Because i was that a questioned? White
speaker-1: Wait.
speaker-0: Yeah, I think that's part of it. I think that's part of a reason you might not feel like Usher. It's not the ⁓ what I was getting at, but I th it's okay okay, it's skid. And it's okay Skid and Bone. I mean I guess I do. But my last name is
speaker-1: It's okay if you think that about me, Ship. Right, sorry. ⁓ Okay. This is what I'm saying. There's no reason you couldn't have sex with any guy you wanted.
speaker-0: Okay, we're gonna move to step two. And that is lowering your voice, all right? Signals a primal instinct to everyone in the room that you're in charge, okay? You're the alpha. So I'm gonna give you a phrase and I need you to read it in your lowest possible voice, okay? Try and keep the note in mind, no intonation as well. We're gonna carry that over. As low as you can, that second one. Yeah, and ⁓ with no intonation.
speaker-1: Okay. As low as I can. Yes. This one. Padam padam. I hear it and I know. Okay. Okay.
speaker-0: I'm gonna pause you. That's not very low. Okay. And there's intonation. So do neither of those th
speaker-1: Padum but ⁓ I hear it and I know. Padum padum I know you want to take me home. Padum and get to know meat close.
speaker-0: Draw the next line. You're not even reading it the way that it is in the song. You're somehow changing it to something worse. Lower your voice.
speaker-1: You think the original is better?
speaker-0: I don't like the song. I'm just saying you're not reading it the way it was sung. You're reading it you're reading it even more gay.
speaker-1: I feel like it might be easier if you showed me a little if you could just try it.
speaker-0: But ⁓ but ⁓ Iard in I know but ⁓
speaker-1: You didn't even have to read it. Sounds like you really know that song ship.
speaker-0: I just do this exercise a lot. You'd be surprised how many people stumble over it.
speaker-1: Can you do it at home with your AirPods in?
speaker-0: What are you implying?
speaker-1: I'm just saying I r any rejection you've had in the past is not indicative of whether or not you could get a really hot guy to blow into your ass. Yeah.
speaker-0: That I again, I am married. I am not looking to do that. We're gonna move to step three. Okay. So all of these things could still be perceived as homosexual, you know, lowering your voice, eliminating your intonation, but if it's paired with a bad attitude,
no one's gonna think you're gay. So a big part of being a man is being pissed off for no reason. So I'm
speaker-1: I give you. I think we know the reason you're pissed off. Having trouble getting a guy.
speaker-0: Yeah, because you Because I can't get you to take this exercise Exercise seriously.
speaker-1: Get me to take this. Stim, I don't think I'm the guy for you, but I think there is Right.
speaker-0: This is what you're going to do. I'm gonna give you a passage and I want you to read it with a bad attitude.
speaker-1: Okay, I've got a new attitude.
speaker-0: Do your best.
speaker-1: Say this, Colin.
speaker-0: Okay. That was a direction, not part of the just keep
speaker-1: go there is like no kind of like font change, bold, underline
speaker-0: You're really in that pilot class.
speaker-1: Finding this difficult to read. I don't think it's annotated in a way that's like simple to read. W okay, so my job here I totally forget. Okay, okay. I lied. Not out of this relationship. I'm in. I'm so in. It's humiliating because here I am begging. Okay, here it is, colon. Your choice, comma. It's simple, colon, her or me.
speaker-0: Mm-hmm. Have a bad attitude.
speaker-1: Period. And I'm pretty sure she's really great. Ellipsis. But Derek, comma. I love you, period. There's a really great like syntax happening here. Owen. It's really, really big. Comma. Pretend to like your taste in music. Let you eat the last piece of cheesecake. Hold on to a ratio over my head. Well, that says radio, skid. Outside your window way, exclamation point.
speaker-0: Don't read that. Just keep going.
speaker-1: Unfortunately that makes me hate you. Love you, so pick me. Choose me, love me, I'll be at Joe's tonight. So if you decide to sign on the papers something weird is happening. But it's spelled papers.
speaker-0: How's it spilled? Okay.
speaker-1: Peppers. Look. Peppers.
speaker-0: Hm nope, that's how you spell papers and you're just pronouncing it. Okay. This exercise was not so successful, I can accept that. Some people aren't ready for that, and I really threw you right in. So we're gonna move into something a little different. We're gonna do some roleplay. ⁓ I Googled gay monologues for faggots and it's what came up first.
speaker-1: Not in my pilot class. ⁓ Okay. What was that monologue from? That's what came up first. ⁓ I have uploaded so many videos to YouTube with the title Gay Monologue for Faggots. And that was what came up first.
speaker-0: Yeah, your SEO must be really
speaker-1: I really need to get my SEO fixed.
speaker-0: For our next exercise, we're gonna do some roleplay. And I'm not talking about the one I do with my wife where she's my high school girlfriend and I'm me. This is to prepare you for dating women, okay? I'm gonna pretend to be a twenty-one year old flight attendant named Bronwyn.
speaker-1: From the real households of Salt Lake City?
speaker-0: No, I is that a character?
speaker-1: That's a real woman. Really? Bronwyn.
speaker-0: And
she's a flight attendant and she's twenty one. Okay, good. Because I So she w I guess it so she's older than twenty one, is what you're saying.
speaker-1: No. Okay. Not anymore. She was twenty one for a time. This could take place in the nineties. No. Okay. When does
speaker-0: Yeah.
speaker-1: Could we set it in a different time?
speaker-0: Will that make you more straight? Okay, what time do you want to do it in?
speaker-1: Yes. I would like to do it in feudal Japan. I think that's fifteen hundred.
speaker-0: ⁓ No, we're staying in America.
speaker-1: Can I hear you do it in feudal Japan? 'Cause you don't speak feudal Japanese.
speaker-0: No, I don't speak any language other than American.
speaker-1: American Ferrera. All right, we can't set it in feudal Japan. Decade.
speaker-0: You want it to
speaker-1: Drink a big bow and take a you keep it up. You know what I'm saying? All right, let us set this in the twenties, the roaring twenties. Okay.
speaker-0: War in twenties, I could do that.
speaker-1: Any flight attendant on the plane?
speaker-0: I didn't on ⁓ I don't know what, like the Hindenburg?
speaker-1: Yeah. You're the flight attendant on my blimp and it's the Roaring Twenties.
speaker-0: And you are trying to get me to have sex with you, okay? And that's fun, because throughout the decades, men have been trying to have sex with women. So it's okay that we're doing this in a deca different decade. Okay, so we're we're in the we're in the roaring and I'm going to play the blimp attendant. Okay.
speaker-1: Dickade. A couple sips a decade. Bronwyn. Yes. And I'm me. And you're you. But it's the twenties.
speaker-0: Yep. And you're trying to get me to sleep with you. Okay. I can I get you a drink.
speaker-1: Okay. Yeah, see I could really use a couple of cocktails so I could sip on ⁓ and get ⁓ down my gullet.
speaker-0: Okay, you want a Tom Collins or an old-fashioned?
speaker-1: Like an old fashioned Tom Collins, you know what I'm saying? He sneaks around in the back and he toms my Collins and he holds my fashions.
speaker-0: Okay, well I guess we'll keep going then. I'm I'm breaking character for a minute to say he toms your collins sounds very homosexual again.
speaker-1: Are you still Bronwyn? He toms my collins till I olden his fashion. If you Tom my Collins, maybe I could grow old in your fashion. ⁓
speaker-0: Okay, so you remember that the purpose of this exercise is to try and get me to have sex with you, me Bronwin, as Bronwyn, this twenty one-year-old blimp attendant. You understand that? Right. Okay, so we're gonna start again. Maybe I didn't do a good enough voice. I'm gonna try and change it, okay? Why don't you why don't you come over here and have a little drink?
speaker-1: It's the twenties. It's the twenties. I think Brahman's voice would be a little higher. ⁓
speaker-0: I'm trying my best. Yeah, okay. No, that's I mean you're obviously not. Okay, I'll try it again. Okay. Why did you come over here and see me?
speaker-1: That's
really I think she has bigger tits though.
speaker-0: I mean I hope so. I kinda love that. You think she has bigger tits. It's a good we're onto something. Okay, I'll try to make her
speaker-1: Like I think she would need like a probably a lot of structure underneath if she was on like a corset of a bodice or something like that. A bodice. Yeah, like a bodice stuff. I think there's like lace going up it. Okay.
speaker-0: Or something. Well, I mean you're getting too interested in the fashion of it. We're go we're veering back into bad ter territory. Let's not talk about the boobs again. Okay, big boobs, big boobs. ⁓ Would you like a drink? You want a drink?
speaker-1: Boobs just got smaller. Yeah, see, I can drink up your little pour a shot of whiskey down your butt crack, sister.
speaker-0: I drink it off my nipple. I'd love that. What would you where would you take me to do this?
speaker-1: I would probably take you down to Willie's and get your flick bean. Okay. I would take you to the bean in Chicago City, USA. We get a flick it together and when it chips our nails, we go to the manicurist and she gives us a nice fresh set. See a minute. I think your voice started dropping. No. It's hard for me to see you as a woman. Because you're such 'cause you're such a sexy manly guy. And there you would have no problem
speaker-0: We were really close there for a I'm such a man. ⁓ you're getting very angry.
speaker-1: Finding a guy to eat cottage cheese out of your hole. Okay.
speaker-0: Let's try again. Okay, do you wanna pick a different decade?
speaker-1: Yes. So this one is gonna take place in Crucible Times. Pilgrims. Pilgrim time. Pilgrim time, Crucible Time, sixteen hundreds. Okay. Salem, Massachusetts. Okay.
speaker-0: And Okay, so I'm a witch.
speaker-1: I'm not saying that. But I'm behind I'm behind you on the broom.
speaker-0: Can be very bad. Okay.
speaker-1: Okay. I'm pulling you in close. Okay. You've got a really broad back, so I'm not worried about falling to either side.
speaker-0: Okay, I mean I guess a woman of that time would be pretty broad shouldered, strong from Okay.
speaker-1: And you have a tattoo that says Shansei I stay. Unless dot dot dot. And then it's kinda I got an emoticon shrugging. Okay.
speaker-0: So we're there's a couple of things that are out of time here. That's fine. We're not even gonna acknowledge the tattoo. I'm a lady on a broomstick, you're holding me. Yes. And you're you're you're trying to convince me a witch to have sex with
speaker-1: Yeah. Yes. Okay. And your name wouldn't be Bronwyn, obviously. No, no, no. Yeah, it would be Archibald.
speaker-0: That's a man's name, so Archibalda No.
speaker-1: Archibald. ⁓ Archibaldo Rodriguez.
speaker-0: Stop trying to change my race.
speaker-1: It's sixteen hundreds. We're gonna be in Venezuela. ⁓ your name is Carmelita Rodriguez. You have a tattoo that says Bailamos and I'm on your broomstick.
speaker-0: No So we're not going to be playing with that. Here's what we're gonna do. We're gonna have some compromise here. Okay. Crucible Times, America, Salem, as originally stated. I'm a witch.
speaker-1: I'm a wizard. Sure. Okay. What
speaker-0: Adding that's fine. I mean you're adding a new detail. That's fine. And you were trying to get me to have sex with you, okay? You ready? Yeah.
speaker-1: Okay. think we could use a spell to change our genders?
speaker-0: Okay.
speaker-1: Don't you think a wizard would say that?
speaker-0: Lead up so much to that and then you immediately made it homosexual.
speaker-1: Sw changing gender is not necessarily homosexual. So you have gender, you have sexuality, you have gender expression, you have your pronouns. And these all operate in kind of a ⁓ overlapping, multifaceted way.
speaker-0: I don't know what any of those things are and I do not care to know. Okay? We're we're moving on. Pissed me up. Skid. Would you say shrimp? What did you say?
speaker-1: Sorry. ⁓ I'm sorry, shrimp. I don't think I said that. I said what you said. Skead.
speaker-0: Okay, you know what?
speaker-1: Three, two, one. SKID. I just I didn't say we were gonna say your name on three.
speaker-0: Hate this. What were you what was the prompt in your mind? Okay. We're gonna move on to some value chance. These are essentially affirmations but for men, okay? So you're gonna repeat after me. I do not want to eat ass.
speaker-1: What we were thirsty for. I do not think I can say that. Want to eat ass.
speaker-0: You have to say it in one fluid sentence. Are you serious about this? Yes. Okay. I do not want to eat ass. Okay. There's other ones here. You're gonna have to be a bit more enthusiastic. I want to wear a shirt that's either a bit too small or way too big.
speaker-1: I do not want to use Okay. I wanna wear a shirt that's way too small. Or way too big. Good. That's sounding pretty gay. Well
speaker-0: Very good, very good. A bit too small is different than way too small.
speaker-1: Small. And way too big. Yeah. Billy Eilish. I want you to stay here in my big shirt. ⁓ Yes?
speaker-0: You're a man. changing the lyrics. In your big shirt. Well you acted confused. You said in your big shirt.
speaker-1: Just you're being random as shit.
speaker-0: What?
speaker-1: Okay. ⁓
speaker-0: Yeah. Thank you, and thank you for getting my name right. Kid
speaker-1: What did I say?
speaker-0: Okay. I do not want to watch Untucked because I only want to get half the story.
speaker-1: Okay. I do not want to watch Untugged because it's late, I'll watch it in the morning.
speaker-0: Pissing me off. Okay. We're moving on. I want to name a pet after a character in top
speaker-1: I want to name a pet after a character in Sex in the City the movie. The first movie. Second movie. Liza Minelli. Playing herself.
speaker-0: What care? Okay, so just Lazanilla, you could have said we should found a way to make it way
speaker-1: What do you think the character name in the script is?
speaker-0: Liza Minnelli, like you said, so you
could've just said I wanna name my pet Liza Minnelli.
speaker-1: She isn't a little different in the movie than she is in real life. And I think my cat would have a lot more to do with her. I think I would want people to call her Liza Minelli from the movie Sex in the City to Here We Go to Abu Dhabi.
speaker-0: Laza Minelli still. I do not want to be a natural blonde. Say it.
speaker-1: I really don't wanna say that.
speaker-0: You gotta say it.
speaker-1: Do you not want to be a natural blonde?
speaker-0: This is sort of like a sort of like no this isn't natural. I bleach my hair by being out in the sun, running on ATV and a big bear.
speaker-1: A T V and a big bear. Mm-hmm. A T V and a Big Bear. And riding on a big bear.
speaker-0: By riding on the A T V and Big Bear's name of a A T V company. I T V A
speaker-1: Big bear. You don't want to be riding on a big bear. Your hair got bleached in the sun while you were riding a big bear. I'm just listening to the words you're saying.
speaker-0: My words and making me sound like I'm getting involved in something that isn't okay. I dedicate my life to help people like you.
speaker-1: Okay, I dedicated my life to doing this interview. You dedicate when I was little, I was like, I want to be on that show one day. Thanks. You have an amazing platform. That's huge. Yes? People love Incredible Listeners.
speaker-0: Yeah, in your life. That's nice of you. to be watch. Just realized also I'm wearing Toots glasses. I thought it would be funny as a prank. Mm, Toots Toots on lunch break. You gotta go eat ⁓ you gotta go eat cucumber cucumber
speaker-1: Where did tooth go? Sandwich sandwich, yeah. Cucumber cream cheese sandwich. Yep. That's basically all he eats.
speaker-0: Yeah, he loves funeral foods like that and deviled eggs. If you could believe it.
speaker-1: Ho he eats deviled eggs? Yeah. He doesn't have a crisis of conscience with that.
speaker-0: No, his his faith is stronger than something that's named after Satan. Okay, I have a couple more for you. All right. I want to like the Facebook page for Steke and a Blow Job Day.
speaker-1: Got it. I wanna like the Facebook page for Sakan of Blood Job Day. Okay. Sounds amazing.
speaker-0: Hey Yes Okay, but wait, what kind of blow job are you thinking about?
speaker-1: From a guy. ⁓
speaker-0: ⁓ Okay, do you have any of your own that you'd like to add in here? Homosexual behaviors you wanna rid yourself of or straight behaviors that you you hope to be taken on in this next
speaker-1: Yes yes, but I would love to watch The Bachelor.
speaker-0: Okay, I didn't just say things you wanna do. These are affirmations, so it's I want to
speaker-1: I want to love to watch The Bachelor tonight on MBC CBS. I don't, but I want to. Wouldn't it be awesome if I love to watch The Bachelor?
speaker-0: Want to love it, meaning you don't love No, I feel like that makes you a lot more gay, right?
speaker-1: Well it's there's never been a gay season of The Bachelor. Really? Really? They've tried to they've tried to make other shows that are like The Bachelor but gay and they're the guys have really bad personalities.
speaker-0: See, gay people have bad personalities. Don't you want to be straight?
speaker-1: No, yes. Wanna ask me that again?
speaker-0: Okay, do you wanna be stress to hear. Okay, do you have any questions from me? Yes. Any ⁓ anything you want to help with specifically?
speaker-1: Straight. I want to be straight so bad. Good. Okay. Yeah. Of course. ⁓ I have a hard time with scoliosis. I don't have it, I just have a hard time with it. Like it seems so unfair.
speaker-0: ⁓ so you just sort of you have empathy is what you're saying. Yeah, we do have to get rid of that if you're gonna be shut. so I'm gonna name things and I want you to just go, Ugh. Okay. Okay. People who need help. Women who wanna be respected.
speaker-1: Okay, ⁓ can we do an exercise to get rid of my empathy? Okay. ⁓ yeah.
speaker-0: Was that Yep. Do wanna be respectful.
speaker-1: Can we try it again? ⁓
speaker-0: That was really good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm very impressed by that. That was
speaker-1: Something about a woman again?
speaker-0: Women who who sh wanna earn ⁓ equal wages, fair wages. This is excellent. We really tapped into something. Doesn't it feel amazing? That cat calling feels amazing. Okay. Woman walking down the street just trying to get where she's going.
speaker-1: I feel really good when I do that. Yeah. Yeah. Smile You look amazing.
speaker-0: Okay. I'm you gotta make it a little more sinister, you know. She should be f feeling afraid. That's what makes me a man, okay? So woman walking down street Yes. W woman walking down the street just trying to get where she's going.
speaker-1: I want her to be afraid of and I just Smile. This is the last day before you're gonna have to dye your roots. So enjoy it. But your time the clock's ticking, honey. Okay.
speaker-0: ⁓ you what, I actually have to go. I have to I have to film a three hour ⁓ YouTube video essay about how Marvel has been changed by Mar Marvel has been changed by the liberals, you know, as evidenced by the decreased amount of cleavage per movie.
speaker-1: Moravo? R well there's a lot of male cleavage in the Marvel movies. ⁓ huh.
speaker-0: I'm I'm against that. That's an another side of liberalism. I don't certainly not. Men should be really strong but the people Why are you pushing your pecks together?
speaker-1: like that. You don't think men should have cleavage. You think about this. Well when you think about it.
speaker-0: I don't think about it. Chef, it's skid. It's skid. Good God. Okay, you know what? Be back here in six months. Skid be back here in six
speaker-1: Come on, Chef. Yeah. Scared. I'm Nick.
speaker-0: Yeah, I understand. You could never be me. You could never be me. The whole thing I you're not trying to be me, but you're trying to be like me. I'm having I'm struggling to th
speaker-1: Kind of thing? I'm trying to I have been trying to like
you. I'm getting close. Okay. But you haven't let me in. You know what? When we were both witches, wizard on that broom, I quite liked you. And I think if we could tap into more of that, I think it would be kind of amazing.
speaker-0: You're gonna role play as a woman and then you'd like me. Yeah, you see that
speaker-1: I think we get along. You don't have to dress up as a girl for guys to want to fuck you, Skid.
speaker-0: The goal for today was to move you further away from homosexuality. Goal! Goal! Go!
speaker-1: But go for today. Go for Go Where am I going? Okay. Sorry, I'm still doing that.
speaker-0: Be back here in six months and Toot will assess you, okay? Good luck. ⁓
speaker-1: Thank you.
speaker-0: We are back. It is six months later, and we are here sitting with the new and improved and straight Nick Shepherd or maybe he's going by a new name these days. It's so good to have you back, Nick. What do you go by? Ursher Ursher Baby.
speaker-1: Ursher baby. Ursher baby. Ursher comma baby.
speaker-0: Okay, Ursher, Ursher, Ursher's working for me. That's a very straight name. I think that's wonderful and might I say, you look so much more rough and tumble than last time you were here. So tell us, what's new? How's your straight journey been going?
speaker-1: Thanks. Been on a world tour, I danced with Kiki Palmer, I filmed the movie Hustlers.
speaker-0: Okay, so you've taken on the persona of Usher, then she's Ursher instead of Usher.
speaker-1: That's what he says. That's what I say. So movie hustlers.
speaker-0: Okay. Okay. And you're Okay, okay. You know what Usher is straight, so look I'm gonna let's do this. Do you have a girlfriend or a wife these days? Okay and
speaker-1: Yeah. But I'm twisted 'cause one side of me is telling me that I move sh need to move on. The other side I wanna break down and cry.
speaker-0: Sounds like you're maybe quoting a song from Usher.
speaker-1: Can you feel me burning? I think that you should let it burn.
speaker-0: It seems like you were maybe unclear on how to make a straight persona, leaving your session with skid, and so you just sort of took on the persona of a straight man, the first straight man you thought of named Usher. That's not what happened.
speaker-1: No. I've been walking into straight nightclubs and feeling like honestly, I want to make love in this club to a woman.
speaker-0: Okay, I mean I know you slipped a lyric in there, but the fact that you do want to make love to a woman is huge. Have you done that? Okay, so you haven't done that yet. That's okay, you're working there. What what do you think your favorite position will be when you eventually do?
speaker-1: Wanna? I think my favorite position will probably be flip it, reverse it. Put that thing down and flip it and reverse it. That's what a good friend of mine says.
speaker-0: Missy Elliot. Yeah, that's not Usher. Missy Elliott is possibly the most lesbian example of a female rapper.
speaker-1: I just call her Missy, Miss for short. Okay. I call her. I say Miss South.
speaker-0: You're friends with Missy Elliott now. What okay, so and y do you have a new job, I guess? Have you been working on a new job? All right. And how is it you said you came back from a world tour, how was your world to
speaker-1: Yeah yeah yeah singer dancer. It was great. I went to Las Vegas, Hong Kong, feudal Japan. Okay. My team is amazing. We've got a couple of scientists that took me to feudal Japan.
speaker-0: It sounds like maybe you didn't have the progress you were hoping for and now now you're just trying to make up for it. Are you gonna be honest with me here? Are you gonna be honest? What happened when you walked out of these doors after your session was skidd? Tell me what happened over the next month when you were trying to find the straight version of yourself. Yeah.
speaker-1: Okay, I can start being honest. I watched a lot of music videos a lot of interviews with Usher. And I went went home and I just watched them over and over again and I couldn't like I just couldn't act like him.
speaker-0: Mm-hmm. You're crying pretty hard, I can see that. It's hard to be him. That's why there's only one usher and guess what? There's only one Nick Shepherd. And I see in front of me a very beautiful soul who's trying his best to walk the straight and narrow. Absolutely. That I would hope was obvious, but I can see that it's not.
speaker-1: You say I don't have to be strong. Do you think I'm kind of like Usher in some ways?
speaker-0: I think that you are powerful like Usher. I think that you're wearing a tank top like he sometimes wears.
speaker-1: How else am I Lego? Sure.
speaker-0: I think that you both have a a a passion for bringing light into people's lives. But here's how you're not like Usher.
speaker-1: Thank you. I can take it.
speaker-0: You're like Nick Shepherd. I think having a last name Shepherd lets us know that you're meant to help guide people to the kingdom of heaven just like me. Don't you think you want to be more like me, Pastor Toot Whitley, than like Usher?
speaker-1: You're so different from Usher. For one. Mm-hmm. There.
speaker-0: I know.
speaker-1: I don't want to say the ways that you're not like Usher, but I'm going to anyway. Okay. First way you're not like Usher is your Twitter presence is super different. Usher's tweeting a lot of clips from performances. He is not really reacting to things in the culture or responding to other things that people say. And you are really getting in a lot of fights on Twitter.
speaker-0: Yes, well, you know, I I try to be very ⁓ helpful in people's religious education on Twitter, but ⁓ it's not always taken very, very well.
speaker-1: Your performance videos is a super different kind of dancing.
speaker-0: ⁓ those are videos of me preaching in the church. So no, I'm I guess you wouldn't I I'm singing, I I I'm singing the choir, I'm singing hymns. And listen, the g the Lord didn't bless me with a great voice. That's not my my
power. My power is to connect with people. Show them that they deserve the love and light of Christ. And to do that they have to give up a big part of themselves that feels integral to their personality. Can you do that?
speaker-1: Yeah. That sounds really beautiful for it.
speaker-0: You say fruit? What it name is T.
speaker-1: Sorry. Yeah, what's your name?
speaker-0: Toot toot Whitley.
speaker-1: I can do this, I can do this, I can do this. Okay, say your name again. Toot. Toot. Poop not poop shitly. Poop shitly.
speaker-0: It's not pope. ⁓ You came in to my office saying
speaker-1: Truth Whitney.
speaker-0: And I'm trying to help you do that. But you've only coming back back into my life to to to try and be Usher adjacent.
speaker-1: Listen, it's gonna burn for me to say this, but it's coming from my heart. It's been a long time coming and we've done it didn't fell apart. I really fell apart okay. Wanna work this out.
speaker-0: Please Good. Me too.
speaker-1: Change. I do, but you don't think it's best we go our separate ways.
speaker-0: Are you saying you don't think you're you're interested in continuing this journey to find your straightness?
speaker-1: Tell me why I should stay in this relationship. When I'm hurting, baby. Because I ain't happy, baby. Plus there's so many other things I gotta deal with. Like what? I think that you should let it burn.
speaker-0: I'm not ready to let go of you yet. I can see within you the power of the Lord. And I don't want you reaching the end of your your terrible sinful life and having to march your way down to hell. I want to see you in heaven. I'm gonna invite you to dinner with my my my my my me ma and my poo poo up there.
speaker-1: There's just so much I've done wrong. Sending pictures, I ain't supposed to. I've got somebody here, but I want you. Huh? I was feeling it the same. Found myself calling her your name. Next thing I wanna say
speaker-0: That's okay. were involved with a woman but you were calling her two?
speaker-1: ⁓ no. I was calling her floof.
speaker-0: Floof.
speaker-1: Floof Gibbard. What is your name?
speaker-0: Toot Whitley.
speaker-1: I think Ship was saying your name wrong earlier. That can't be right.
speaker-0: Okay, let me ask you something. Do you want to be straight yes or no? Just yes or no? Just yes? Or? You've gotten a lot stupider since you were here last. Which arguably is more straight. Okay. Maybe you're just a really stupid gay guy.
speaker-1: Yes or no? Just yes. Just yes or Period. Clip that's
speaker-0: I want you to be saved. Do you want to be saved? Okay. Do you want to go to the kingdom of heaven?
speaker-1: Totally. Yes, it the Kingdom of Heaven sounds awesome. If it's anything like Magic Kingdom, I think it's probably amazing.
speaker-0: Magic Kingdom like in Disneyland. Okay. Yeah, I mean I mean some people have said heaven is the amusement park of the gods, so I think it's possible.
speaker-1: Time yeah. Yeah. And the same food. It's the same caterers.
speaker-0: It's the same caterers in Anaheim as it is in the kingdom of heaven. You're nodding. You're nodding a lot.
speaker-1: the same c caterers. I have a friend that works for the catering company. He does Mondays, Wednesdays, Fridays, Disney, Tuesdays, Thursdays, Kingdom of Heaven.
speaker-0: And he told you that. Okay, well that's interesting. I'd like to meet this friend.
speaker-1: They tip in the kingdom of heaven.
speaker-0: Yeah, of course they do.
speaker-1: But the tips are like god coins and you can't spend them down here.
speaker-0: There's an economy in heaven. Yeah. It's not something that's written in the Bible really.
speaker-1: The distribution of wealth there is so fogged. So it feels familiar.
speaker-0: Though I'm very passionate about the soapbox you've just gotten up onto to speak about capitalism. Very brave of you to
speaker-1: One percent of the angels have ninety percent of the wall. Like people are having to melt down their halos just to pay for their cloud. That's just what my friend says. I have not been there obviously. I'm busy singing
speaker-0: It doesn't sound like you're gonna get there either. Busy doing what? I have to tell you something and it's gonna shake you to your very core. Are you ready? You are not the international singer and pop star Usher. You are a gay man who has decided your only way to salvation is by pretending to be a straight man who I can't tell whether you admire or want to be in a relationship with, quite frankly.
speaker-1: You don't think you should admire the person you're in a relationship with?
speaker-0: Certainly not if you're straight.
speaker-1: That sounds right. Yeah. So you're saying I should fuck someone I respect less than Usher?
speaker-0: Who's also a woman, yes.
speaker-1: I respect every woman more than Usher. But that's just 'cause of how much I respect every woman. Okay. ⁓ no, I'm thinking of some women.
speaker-0: Yeah, like what are some women that you don't respect?
speaker-1: Women that I respect less than Usher. Yeah. I would say that I respect probably respect Ghilline Maxwell less than Usher. She's I know. And it's the things that she said to me in my room are fucked up. She said ⁓ it was in French. She said, Guy se lais E force in him. That's the one English word she said, but the rest of that was
speaker-0: What did she say? Force? Yeah. I mean that's sort of in line with what I understand about Yeah, I do. Yeah, of course. So say one more time. Of course. Exact same way you said it the first time? Yep.
speaker-1: But you speak French? If you wanted to translate it for the listener, I think Mm-hmm. Gary's pride is gone and her head's for skinny.
speaker-0: I need to harvest your foreskin is what she was saying. I don't know. She's probably up to something bad.
speaker-1: She was up to some stuff that was bad while the dupe of her was in prison. She's was out yesterday.
speaker-0: This was recent. Dupe of her was in prison. Not a doppelganger, but the dupe.
Sort of the worst.
speaker-1: It's got a lot of the same ingredients, but the more expensive stuff is not there.
speaker-0: Like a personalized scent, kinda.
speaker-1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So it's it's got the same top notes. Yeah. She's got the Glen top notes, but underneath it's kind of her name is Glene Johnson. Her birth name. Wow. Yeah, yeah, yeah. ⁓ but she was gay and which she wanted to be straight. So she started emulating Ghlaine Maxwell.
speaker-0: Mm-hmm. And then she was put into jail. Right. Yeah, absolutely. I mean I'd put you there.
speaker-1: You think gay people should go to jail? Well, I'm not Gam Usher.
speaker-0: Okay. I mean I will still consider this a win. I'm gonna keep this ⁓ I'm gonna consider you part of my hundred percent success rate because even though maybe Nick Shepherd isn't straight, Nick Shepherd has become Usher who is straight.
speaker-1: Do you worry about the hundred percent success rate feeling in ⁓ inauthentic? Only because you know a lot of commercials will do the nine out of ten dentists and that feels like, ⁓ I could believe that. You know what I mean? I'm like, that's a really h ⁓ my god, that's a lot. That's a high percentage.
speaker-0: higher than nine out of ten? Ten out of ten. It's a hundred per
speaker-1: Right. But it feels kind of less believable than nine out of ten.
speaker-0: I'm not really in this for the marketing angle. I'm sort of in it for saving people's souls. So no, I'm not worried about that. Saving people's souls.
speaker-1: I'll say that one more time. Seven people's souls. You want me to be one of the seven people's souls that you're trying to take?
speaker-0: Save it. Trying to save. I mean, if you're gonna think it's seven, sure. I'm trying to save your soul. Save
speaker-1: Sever my soul? I can't
speaker-0: We've been very successful today. We found a way to ⁓ help ⁓ Mr Shepherd or Usher ⁓ get into the light of Christ and for that I am grateful. ⁓ now just before we wrap things up I am
speaker-1: That's where we wrap this up.
speaker-0: I am sort of curious, if there's any media that you would like to plug that we should avoid. And I'm and and this is, you know, ⁓ things in general, like maybe maybe social media handles we shouldn't be searching up, ⁓ projects online that we shouldn't be watching.
speaker-1: ⁓ yeah. I would definitely steer clear of two girls, one cup.
speaker-0: Okay, I want any any actual
speaker-1: I would not look up Very Good Clown on Instagram. I just think that that seems a person that has maybe left that life behind and is now soaring the world. I would probably not look up Trudy Periodetective on Instagram just because of there's like sexy stuff happening on there that feels wrong and it feels bad. ⁓ and really related to like murder and crime and I don't go there. Mm-hmm. ⁓ and then last but not least, probably I would never go to Very Gay Paint on all platforms. ⁓ just in the title alone, it just feels like not aligned with what the people listening to this podcast want. Mm-hmm.
speaker-0: I appreciate that. You know, I'm always looking for pages to avoid online. Thank you so much for letting me save your soul. And thank you for paying attention and listening while we save people's souls.
speaker-1: Course. Thank you so much for having me, Trooch. ⁓