अनुलिपि 🔗
WEBVTT
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Oh my gosh, the last time we were here, you had twins in there.
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In here.
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And now they're out there in the world.
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Yeah, almost a year.
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That's wild.
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Yeah.
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So I'm happy to be back here and doing this with you.
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Oh my goodness.
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Me too.
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Me too.
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Okay, so let's jump in.
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It's Halloween season.
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And so we are going to talk about three horror films that we love and are super fun.
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Yes.
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Those films are Back Rooms by director Kane Parsons.
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Obsession, directed by Curry Barker, and The Ring, directed by Gore Brobinski 2002.
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Oh my gosh, where do we even start?
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I don't know.
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I'm just excited about diving into this like horror realm because there's just so much material here for us.
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I mean, I feel like the horror genre looks into the stuff that is just makes us who we are and what makes humans just scary.
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Honestly scary.
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It's like the terror of our existence.
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Yes.
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So yeah, I'm pumped.
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It's the best genre for capturing.
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Yeah, our condition, the human condition.
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I feel like the biggest theme that I found within a lot of these movies is like this lack of acceptance.
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Say more.
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Like starting with obsession.
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Bear cannot accept that he, you know, he that he's that he's not gonna get the girl.
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No.
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And he's clinging.
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He's clinging so hard.
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Yeah.
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And he makes a really desperate move.
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Right.
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So this is like a lack of acceptance, a lack of agency.
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Um and then in backrooms, we see the same thing again with Clark when he's down, when he's in the back rooms in this liminal space.
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Yeah.
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Right.
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Um, which we know off the off the bat that it's his unconscious, that this is the area where all of the work needs to be done that he's not doing the loops and the habits.
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Um and uh he, of course, doesn't accept his like that.
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I mean, he he he has too much acceptance, right?
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He has too much acceptance in stage.
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So curious and so unperturbed.
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Mm-hmm.
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And that gets him stuck in that place.
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So that's the cautionary tale.
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Um, and then with the ring, our antagonist in that film as well, doesn't has no way out really.
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And what we think is her way out ends up being just her way of projecting her trauma.
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Perpet perpetuating it onto that next person, that next generation.
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So it takes it us beyond the individual, right?
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And into a generational view of it all.
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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So there isn't a lot of like moving forward in any of these three movies for these people.
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Except is the horror.
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Which is the horror, exactly.
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That is the most terrifying part.
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This is the stuff we're afraid of that we never grow, that we never change, that we never find love, that we never find safety.
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Yeah.
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Um, I mean, what's more terrifying than that?
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Yeah.
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Nothing.
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Yeah.
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Or you're gonna lose it all.
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You have it and you're gonna lose it all.
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I've been thinking about that lately a lot.
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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Almost uh kind of wrote a song about it a little bit too.
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Um, just thinking about how much love is in my life and how it's the thing I dreaded so much, like not being able to get it or losing it because of my set of trauma.
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Yeah.
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And so now I have it all.
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The thing that I work so hard to get out of my loops and habits and you know behaviors to find and to cultivate in my life.
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And I have it now, and now like the biggest and the fear is still there, it doesn't go away.
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It's just it's just more tender and more real and more palpable, and it's it's terrifying.
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That is terrifying.
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It's terrifying to think about something happening to the people you love.
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It is, it is they're they're your source of once you dare to even love, which is what I hear you say.
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Load full transcript
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
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Yeah, yeah.
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You do surrender to it.
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Definitely, definitely.
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Bear is such a coward in obsession.
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It was so hard for me to watch Bear.
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At first, I could find it in myself to relate to his desperation.
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You know, I kind of wanted to like him at first.
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Right.
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It seemed there was a certain eagerness that seemed sweet in a way for me.
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I wonder, did it come across that way to you?
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Yeah, there was something.
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Oh, he's the nice guy in the group, uh-huh.
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Right?
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Uh-huh.
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He's the sensitive guy in the group.
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That's how he comes across at the start.
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But then you see more and more he's actually very cowardly.
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Right.
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And has no confidence, no, no healthy ego strength at all.
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And therefore no respect for anyone else.
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Really.
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Really?
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It's all about his own desire.
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And his own like he's like, and then trying to be the good guy, and trying to be the good guy, and trying to be the good guy, and repressing what maybe we would want to call his shadow, or this part of him that is more selfish or more like self-absorbed, he then is like like eking out all of this kind of violent energy onto Nikki.
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Yes.
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Yeah, say more about that.
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Which part?
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Just like how he suppresses this thing and so how it manifests, how it comes out.
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Yeah, I think when when I first watched him, I I felt like you could see his like lack of owning his own like kind of aggression, his own um sense of disappointment, his own sense of like even being able to bear some sort of reality.
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And it does come across sweet, sensitive, kind, but in by betraying his own needs, I think he he then all of that stuff gets like pushed down and it and it comes out in this manipulative way, in this way where you actually find by his acting out that he doesn't truly care for Nikki, right?
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He can act like that, but we find out that he he really cares about himself only, even though he portrays or seems like such a generous person, I thought at the beginning.
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Right.
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Yeah.
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I just heard my neighbor wheel down his trash and I got distracted.
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Yeah.
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Hope it didn't catch it.
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It's Thursday.
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Um yeah, he just he and I and I want to feel bad.
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You want to feel bad for him.
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Like you do.
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You do want to feel bad for him, someone who doesn't have that it's like the lack of reciprocity in the world.
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Sure.
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Yes, but also the self-love part, right?
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That he doesn't have any of that.
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And so you want to kind of, you know, oh, I hope you find some confidence in yourself and love yourself.
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You're kind of rooting for him a little bit at the very beginning.
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At the very beginning.
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Yeah.
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You're like, that's the sweetest thing he says about the, you know, when they're at the cafe and he's practicing on the, you know, and he's practicing what he would say to her.
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Um, and yeah, it sounds like he's really in touch, but um but when he makes a wish to change her feelings towards him, realizes that it is not really who she is, and continues to use her, then we have the issue of consent, right?
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And so we know that's a big theme in that one.
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Yeah.
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But what I find most striking about the movie is this like the idea of magical thinking, which um in anthropology and cultural anthropology, it is it is part of one, it's described as one of our cognitive capabilities.
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So, like, in addition to so like another example is like irritative thinking.
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Yep.
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This is unique to humans where I can think about what you're what you're thinking about, what I'm thinking.
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Irrative, right?
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Like it's just going back, back and forth, back and forth.
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Yeah.
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Magical thinking is another thing that's unique to us, which is when our current conditions don't meet our expectations and are not giving us what we want, and we feel a sense of like urgency and um and disappointment or frustration, um, then we will appeal to something or someone on the other side of the veil of the natural world to give us some knowledge of the future or to give us something.
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Intervene, something.
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To intervene in some way, give us give us a solution.
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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Back.
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So that's something we uniquely
do.
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And we have all these rituals to do that, right?
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Yeah.
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I mean, religion is based off of magical thinking, yes, you know, praying and seeking and and hoping for something to come in and control and change the situation to meet what what our expectations are and what we want or our desires are.
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Right.
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Um, and so he he and this is great too because it's it's the commoditization of magical stuff, right?
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Of this thing that we do, which so ineffable.
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Like yeah, that's so ineffable, so so unreachable, right?
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But buy it for you know$3.99.
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Right, yeah.
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Right.
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Yeah.
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Um, one of the funniest things is when he calls the he calls the customer support and they're like completely unhelpful, you know, just like so like in the substance.
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Oh, you want to put in a cancellation request.
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Yes, yes, yes, yes.
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Well, we don't do that.
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We don't do it.
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It mocks him, they just mock him, and it it it's like this yeah, like he he's trying.
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It's this cheap thing that he buys that he makes the swish on a limb.
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He's not thinking ahead, he's not really thinking anything of it, and now he's stuck and he's stuck in it, and there's this mocking of like you what you think you can just take back, you you cannot think about what you're gonna do.
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Yeah, didn't you read the box?
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It's on the box, yeah.
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Mm-hmm.
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Yeah.
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But I also feel that that frustration as like a customer who's called, and I and I know that being on the other end of that is not easy.
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No.
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Um, but you know, it is it it's so it's so frustrating in our culture, which is you know, run by capitalism and our our behaviors and everything is all tied and connected to that mentality of kind of, you know, you work, you purchase, that makes the economy grow and this, you know, and the world goes round.
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Yeah.
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And and this idea of like of the thing you signed up for not giving you what you expected, and then not being able to find any solution with the problem, any remedy for it.
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That's the perfect word.
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Yeah, right.
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And then I think, okay, if we're thinking about power in capitalism, like if these corporations hold all of this power, is it unfair to expect a sort uh some sort what level of individual responsibility is even fair to expect on the consumer aka bear here of like really?
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I mean it is he controlled by like is he just is he also the victim of this commoditization?
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I think so.
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Yeah.
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I mean, that's the whole zombie trope.
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Yeah.
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Is this fear we have of like just being mindless consumerists in this uh culture and having no agency, feeling like we are we really making choices for ourselves?
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Or is our culture conditioning us to make these choices?
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And there's a lot of argument that would show that um we're not making these choices for ours for ourselves, considering what is sold to us, the advertisements, the the algorithms that we are constantly being told what to think and what to want.
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Um so I feel for him as a consumer.
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I feel for him in that way, but but nothing else.
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But nothing else.
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And then he perpetuates this on onto Nikki.
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Like we see him being trapped in and and in this role as a consumer of not having a certain amount of agency or power, and then he like really doubles down on how he inflicts that onto Nikki.
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So just I find the it's happening to him, and now he's going to exert it on someone else, and then be blind, choose to be blind to it for some time is he does quite an interesting play.
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Yeah, I mean it's serving him, it is, so he's fine with it, it's not serving Nikki.
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No, oh my gosh, and as long as she doesn't misbehave, he's cool with it.
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But he only seems to get worried or upset when she does something inconvenient, right?
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Like makes the mess on the floor, like knead him, you know, like cook his cat.
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But as long as she's pleasant, right?
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He's cool with the arrangement.
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Cool enough.
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Forgiving her body, he's cool with it.
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Um man, you just said something to uh oh, when in the customer support, the the the person says, uh it sounds like you have a moral obligation to take care of her now.
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Yeah.
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And um, and she, you know, he doesn't.
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No.
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And the whole time you're I'm just like waiting for him to like, okay, man, you signed up for this.
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Yeah.
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You made this wish.
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Yeah, of course, you didn't really think anything was gonna happen, but you were hoping something was gonna happen, and it did.
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Yeah.
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So you do have a moral obligation to now soothe her and take care of her.
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Like when she just all the wounds.
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I'm like, take care of her wounds, man.
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Like, just like it just lets her bleed.
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Yeah, he doesn't even get up.
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I'm sorry to get this.
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No, no, no, no.
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It's so frustrating.
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Yeah.
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At the party, right?
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When she starts, yeah, he just kind of sits there and everyone's like, gosh, dude.
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Yeah, what are you doing?
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This is where his cowardice really begins to reveal itself, all the way through the end, where it's so funny.
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So many times in this movie I've laughed out loud.
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Um, and one of the times was when he's considering killing himself and he tries to, yeah, and he goes back on it twice.
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Twice.
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And I just I just laughed out loud because it was just so funny the way the music drops off um when he's like, you know, trying to throw up uh, you know, throw, you know, get rid of the medication he took or whatever to do what he was he was doing there.
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And um I mean, so funny.
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He's just a coward to the end.
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And he's an anti-hero, he does not have a positive arc, he is not someone we look at at any point.
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Thank God he doesn't redeem himself.
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He doesn't at all.
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He doesn't.
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In fact, he like he he's his demise comes out of his wish, right?
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Not only the demise of his friends, yeah, but his own.
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Because if he hadn't wished that on Nikki, she wouldn't have wished it back and led him not to be able to throw up those pills.
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Right.
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Right, right.
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And at least at the very end, she wakes up in time.
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Because then I I know this is like this would have been a Romeo and Juliet moment where the other wakes up and the other thinks the other's dead, and then they're like, Okay, I'm gonna take my life too.
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And so we get some redemption of that ancient myth, you know, finally, like, oh thank God, Nikki awakes in time, but she's awaking to I mean, horror.
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Three people dead in that apartment.
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Her whole world, really, her whole world.
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Yeah, I'm laughing a lot because it's it's the funniest movie to me.
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It's um, I think it's being categorized as a as a comedy.
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I hope so wild to me.
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I hope so.
00:16:59.519 --> 00:17:00.320
We'll see what happens.
00:17:00.399 --> 00:17:06.559
But anyway, I love when you talked about it being funny because I'll tell you when I watched it, no part of me admitted funny.
00:17:06.640 --> 00:17:09.440
I did not see that part at all.
00:17:09.680 --> 00:17:10.559
At all, at all.
00:17:10.880 --> 00:17:11.759
It really got me.
00:17:11.920 --> 00:17:12.480
It got me.
00:17:12.559 --> 00:17:14.160
Oh, we know we've talked about this too.
00:17:14.240 --> 00:17:23.920
Um, when she's in the shower and he's like, honey, I'm gonna go hang out with the boys, and like you can hear the water faucet turning off really suddenly.
00:17:24.240 --> 00:17:24.559
Okay.
00:17:29.839 --> 00:17:31.279
I've said that before.
00:17:32.000 --> 00:17:33.599
I've been there, done that.
00:17:34.079 --> 00:17:47.599
Um, yeah, and so there's that codependence humor, you know, just like how we all have been in the situation of like this unhealthy wanting and desire of the other person.
00:17:48.160 --> 00:17:51.119
Um, so that was relatable, which is why it was so funny.
00:17:51.359 --> 00:17:52.640
So, what do you think about?
00:17:52.720 --> 00:17:57.440
I have like one outstanding question that I keep playing with.
00:17:58.799 --> 00:18:02.480
He wishes for her to love him.
00:18:04.640 --> 00:18:09.759
She doesn't end up loving him, she's uh ends up obsessed with him.
00:18:11.039 --> 00:18:14.400
He we find does isn't loving towards her.
00:18:15.519 --> 00:18:23.200
I guess the my question is like, is is this also a commentary on like what is love?
00:18:23.599 --> 00:18:24.240
Oh gosh.
00:18:24.559 --> 00:18:27.119
Because he asks her at one point, well, do you do you even like me?
00:18:27.440 --> 00:18:28.480
Or do you like me?
00:18:28.799 --> 00:18:30.000
And she's like, Well, I love you.
00:18:30.880 --> 00:18:34.559
But um yeah, is it a separate thing than like?
00:18:35.119 --> 00:18:36.960
Well, it is the ineffable, right?
00:18:37.200 --> 00:18:47.759
It is it is it does happen in the part of the mind where words don't happen, so it's hard to describe how and why you love somebody.
00:18:47.839 --> 00:18:48.319
Yeah.
00:18:48.480 --> 00:18:51.279
Um or language, excuse me, language.
00:18:51.519 --> 00:18:57.920
So it's happening in a different part of the mind, unless research has changed and there's something new information about there.
00:18:58.079 --> 00:19:03.920
Don't quote me on that, but last I checked, that's why it's hard to articulate why we love the people we do.
00:19:04.240 --> 00:19:04.480
Right.
00:19:04.640 -->
00:19:08.160
Um, but yeah, is it is it a I think that's so great.
00:19:08.480 --> 00:19:10.960
Like, what is what is yeah is it?
00:19:11.119 --> 00:19:25.680
Like, I even just if I'm thinking about Nikki, Nikki's love towards Bear, not wanting him to go be with his friends, I wouldn't categorize as loving.
00:19:26.319 --> 00:19:26.640
Right.
00:19:26.880 --> 00:19:27.119
No.
00:19:27.279 --> 00:19:30.400
I mean, we can go through all Bear's actions, like none of that feels loving either.
00:19:30.720 --> 00:19:33.039
But it's it's I don't know, I play with it.
00:19:33.279 --> 00:19:34.400
It's a hard thing to describe.
00:19:34.559 --> 00:19:36.640
I don't really know where to go.
00:19:37.279 --> 00:19:45.279
No, it's all very unhealthy, toxic, codependent stuff on her on her end, but she's not herself.
00:19:45.440 --> 00:19:45.759
Yeah.
00:19:46.000 --> 00:19:50.720
But what she is displaying is that's not love.
00:19:50.880 --> 00:19:53.279
I'm sure you've been, I'm we've been there, yes, right?
00:19:53.599 --> 00:19:57.279
With that person where it's like you and it feels like love.
00:19:57.680 --> 00:20:05.200
And then and then now we've had the oh my gosh, the luck, the incredible luck of finding love in our lives.
00:20:05.359 --> 00:20:10.720
Yes, and knowing that that was that's not even close to what love is.
00:20:11.279 --> 00:20:12.319
Love does not control.
00:20:12.880 --> 00:20:14.079
Love does not control.
00:20:14.400 --> 00:20:18.000
And that it's what's happening at both sides of the equation there.
00:20:18.079 --> 00:20:20.319
Yeah, Nikki not within her control.
00:20:20.960 --> 00:20:25.200
So glad you brought this up because we we all it's it's cliche, but love is a choice, right?
00:20:25.440 --> 00:20:26.880
That's something we hear all the time.
00:20:27.519 --> 00:20:35.119
She had no choice, and I think sometimes in those toxic relationships, it feels like it's not a choice.
00:20:35.200 --> 00:20:49.599
It feels like something has like there's an overriding of the system somewhere, and it doesn't feel like I'm I like I consciously really like and want to make this person happy, like this person and want to make them happy.
00:20:49.680 --> 00:20:54.480
And right, it's like something there's a bewitchment happening.
00:20:55.519 --> 00:20:56.880
Um interesting.
00:20:57.039 --> 00:20:58.400
I don't know what else to go on beyond.
00:20:58.640 --> 00:21:01.759
Yeah, I don't know how else to uh to play there, but it's just it's been stewing.
00:21:02.079 --> 00:21:03.759
Yeah, that's great.
00:21:04.079 --> 00:21:17.680
Um there is we were talking about magic and in backrooms when Clark has made his descent, like he is hanging out there, he's made a life.
00:21:18.559 --> 00:21:24.799
Yes, he's made a life, he's eating the still life, the other like projections of humans or whatever.
00:21:25.039 --> 00:21:27.839
He's resigned to this world.
00:21:28.160 --> 00:21:34.480
Well, there's a scene when Mary Mary finds
him, comes across him, but before she does, right, there's this mural, this like crazy.
00:21:34.640 --> 00:21:35.200
Do you remember that?
00:21:35.279 --> 00:21:43.759
Yes, with all this art and I and I paused on something and I saw that on the wall it said, um, Clark did all this.
00:21:44.000 --> 00:21:45.759
Why think in terms of magic?
00:21:46.079 --> 00:21:47.359
Be realistic.
00:21:48.400 --> 00:21:56.480
And so I was just thinking so much about how, like, you know, I don't want to, I don't want to um demonize for lack of better word.
00:21:56.559 --> 00:21:58.880
Um, actually, that's perfect word for this.
00:21:59.119 --> 00:22:01.200
Um The idea of magical thinking.
00:22:01.279 --> 00:22:02.559
This is something we do.
00:22:02.880 --> 00:22:03.680
We do this.
00:22:03.839 --> 00:22:06.319
Um, and I feel like Clark needs a little bit of magic.
00:22:06.799 --> 00:22:08.000
He needs a little bit of hope.
00:22:08.079 --> 00:22:18.240
He needs to be able to see beyond his reality because he's so stuck in his loops and his neural pathways of least resistance, as Mary calls it.
00:22:18.640 --> 00:22:18.880
Right?
00:22:18.960 --> 00:22:35.279
Like he's so there all the time that and and and he's he's just trying to justify everything, rationalize everything, and this creates this victimization and this whining attitude that Mary calls him out at uh out on at the dining table.
00:22:35.440 --> 00:22:38.880
Yeah, you know, and he needs some magic, he needs some hope.
00:22:39.039 --> 00:22:45.359
And I think that's what magical thinking does for us is it gives us hope, or we can't see any at face value.
00:22:45.599 --> 00:22:45.759
Yeah.
00:22:46.160 --> 00:22:51.200
Hope inspiration, something that can help us transcend what we know.
00:22:51.680 --> 00:22:52.160
Right.
00:22:52.400 --> 00:22:56.480
And and to believe that there is something different or something better, right?
00:22:56.640 --> 00:22:57.519
That makes a lot of sense.
00:22:57.680 --> 00:22:59.519
Yeah, you know, he needs some of it.
00:22:59.680 --> 00:23:01.039
Yeah, Bear needs less of it.
00:23:01.200 --> 00:23:09.839
Bear needs some agency and some trust in himself, and he needs to, you know, figure out to bear reality, yeah.
00:23:10.000 --> 00:23:11.519
Yeah, that's it.
00:23:11.680 --> 00:23:26.240
And that's the kind of the theme is like this acceptance and this lack of it, this lack of like taking ownership, but that takes a lot of um love, self-love.
00:23:26.319 --> 00:23:27.839
That takes that work.
00:23:28.559 --> 00:23:40.000
And so when Mary's like, I don't know how to get you out of this, your brain is wired that wired that way, and he's like, Well, how do I, you know, help me get out, or what he asks something and she's like, I don't know how to help you with this, honestly.
00:23:40.240 --> 00:23:42.559
She's going through her own thing, she is, right?
00:23:43.839 --> 00:23:48.720
But in the work you do, it's about building that self-esteem, right?
00:23:48.880 --> 00:23:51.359
I mean, as a psychotherapist, that's a huge part of it.
00:23:51.440 --> 00:24:06.640
That's a huge part of my journey and growth was like, until I could trust that my well and capacity for love, that I could fill it up, that I would be okay giving some of it away.
00:24:06.880 --> 00:24:07.279
Yeah.
00:24:07.599 --> 00:24:08.480
I would be safe.
00:24:08.640 --> 00:24:09.039
Yeah.
00:24:09.359 --> 00:24:20.079
And Bear and Clark just feel so, Clark's in this case, feels so depleted by his wife, by his circumstance, by the world.
00:24:20.720 --> 00:24:22.880
His dreams have been put on the side.
00:24:23.839 --> 00:24:43.039
And he doesn't know how to love himself enough to fill up his own well, right, so that he could be uh an agent in the world, you know, like a co-creator in his world alongside life.
00:24:43.359 --> 00:24:44.720
He gives up his agency.
00:24:44.880 --> 00:24:45.119
Yeah.
00:24:45.759 --> 00:24:46.400
Both of them really do.
00:24:46.480 --> 00:24:50.559
But yeah, Clark, he gives up his agency and he's and he's mad about it.
00:24:50.799 --> 00:24:51.759
He's so mad about it.
00:24:51.920 --> 00:24:53.359
He's so resentful.
00:24:53.839 --> 00:24:55.039
So much rage in him.
00:24:55.279 --> 00:24:59.279
And you just like watch it seethe.
00:24:59.839 --> 00:25:02.559
And I think we know what that feels like.
00:25:02.720 --> 00:25:15.119
The this I know what it feels like, this resistance to take responsibility for the ways in which we've contributed to the pain in our own lives.
00:25:15.519 --> 00:25:31.039
There is some like you know, you talk about non-acceptance, and it feels like Clark he can't accept he can't accept his own choices.
00:25:31.200 --> 00:25:31.359
Yeah.
00:25:31.599 --> 00:25:35.200
And that they've led him to he can't accept responsibility, really.
00:25:35.599 --> 00:25:36.160
He can't.
00:25:36.480 --> 00:25:37.359
He he can't.
00:25:37.519 --> 00:25:37.759
Right.
00:25:37.920 --> 00:25:46.079
And he resents those like his wife, who he talks about, who who dare to want more, or who dare to take that.
00:25:46.720 --> 00:25:47.200
Yes, right.
00:25:47.599 --> 00:25:51.759
Who dare to need anyone else or rely on anyone else.
00:25:52.400 --> 00:25:53.440
And he hates it.
00:25:53.680 --> 00:25:56.559
Yeah, because it's what he wants for himself.
00:25:58.319 --> 00:26:02.480
But he he would never feel comfortable enough saying it.
00:26:02.799 --> 00:26:06.480
And what you said about like what the work that we do in psychotherapy is so right.
00:26:06.559 --> 00:26:23.440
I think a lot of what we, you know, in session, there's a lot of focus, at least in how I practice psychotherapy, in gaining insight into why I am enacting the patterns that I'm enacting and what are they?
00:26:23.599 --> 00:26:23.759
Yeah.
00:26:24.000 --> 00:26:36.799
And that insight is important only as so far as I believe as it gives you enough courage to like make the leap into doing something
different, and then you can experience something different.
00:26:37.039 --> 00:26:51.759
So we talk about these cognitive loops from and and different people have different theories about this, but from from where I practice, I believe that changing your thinking isn't what gets you out of the cognitive loop.
00:26:51.839 --> 00:26:56.799
It's experience something in the world that changes, that really changes.
00:26:57.039 --> 00:27:03.920
And so you need a certain amount of courage, a certain amount of hope or magical thinking to see a possibility.
00:27:04.319 --> 00:27:07.839
To see a possibility and to trust it enough to give it a shot.
00:27:08.000 --> 00:27:08.319
Okay.
00:27:08.480 --> 00:27:13.200
And is it because the new experience creates a new neural pathway, like another way out?
00:27:14.079 --> 00:27:21.039
A new way of, oh, um, okay, agoraphor agoraphobia, which Mary's mom suffers from.
00:27:21.200 --> 00:27:21.519
Yep.
00:27:21.759 --> 00:27:22.000
Right?
00:27:22.160 --> 00:27:27.839
So, like if she were to create new experiences where of herself where she's safe outside, perhaps, right?
00:27:28.240 --> 00:27:33.359
She's creating, and then she has the experience that tells her, Oh, I did that, I was safe.
00:27:33.680 --> 00:27:34.640
And we build on that.
00:27:34.799 --> 00:27:35.680
And we build on that.
00:27:35.839 --> 00:27:38.559
And that's the whole like theory behind like exposure therapy.
00:27:38.880 --> 00:27:39.839
I was thinking exposure therapy.
00:27:39.920 --> 00:27:40.000
Yeah.
00:27:40.240 --> 00:27:41.759
It's the whole theory behind exposure therapy.
00:27:41.920 --> 00:27:42.960
I survived it, I did that.
00:27:43.119 --> 00:27:43.440
Right.
00:27:43.599 --> 00:27:51.200
And in relationships, and reg in regards to trust, which is I think a lot of what's at play in these films, and a lot of what a lot of us struggle with.
00:27:51.279 --> 00:28:04.559
Like agoraphobia might be something that we know or we can understand in a certain sense, but I think it's so much more universal to have a lot of fear and worry about trusting in someone or even in ourselves.
00:28:04.799 --> 00:28:13.839
And that feels like the leap that we really try to take in that thinking of like, could something be different?
00:28:14.319 --> 00:28:22.319
Because you get it's hard to convince yourself of what you know when it doesn't line up to like what your bones know.
00:28:22.480 --> 00:28:27.279
So that experience is like letting that settle down into your into your bones.
00:28:27.440 --> 00:28:28.720
Yeah, that's convincing.
00:28:29.039 --> 00:28:29.519
Right.
00:28:29.839 --> 00:28:38.880
You know, if everyone I've ever known has betrayed me, sure, I can know that I guess there are people out there that wouldn't do that, but until I really experience it, right?
00:28:40.319 --> 00:28:41.440
It's gonna be tough.
00:28:41.759 --> 00:28:44.319
Yeah, that's that mind-body connection.
00:28:47.359 --> 00:28:57.119
I I'm thinking
about the loop, the constant, and so in the ring, she is so trapped in this place.
00:28:57.759 --> 00:29:13.920
Um and she has this gift called like it's called I've I've heard it, I've read it called a few things, but like um photokinetic or like photo psychic projections, she is uh thermogenesis.
00:29:14.000 --> 00:29:18.640
Like she's basically able to project images and create images just with her mind.
00:29:18.960 --> 00:29:21.359
I didn't even consider how she was creating these images.
00:29:21.519 --> 00:29:22.000
Yeah, okay.
00:29:22.160 --> 00:29:22.720
Yeah, yeah.
00:29:22.880 --> 00:29:25.839
I know techno kinetic is like another term I heard.
00:29:25.920 --> 00:29:27.680
I've heard so many, I've read so many different terms.
00:29:27.839 --> 00:29:28.400
Like, what is it?
00:29:28.480 --> 00:29:37.119
But there is a Japanese actual word for this phenomenon, and there was some research done around a group of women who apparently were creating some things.
00:29:37.200 --> 00:29:43.039
I I did not look into the to the study or anything like that, but that's what this is, that's what the Japanese version is based off.
00:29:43.440 --> 00:29:52.319
So this is her gift, this is her thing, and um it's her gift, it's turned into a curse because she hasn't been loved, right?
00:29:52.559 --> 00:30:05.440
So speaking of a well, not not filled, you know, like she is she's such an interesting um character because I don't think she means to harm Samara.
00:30:05.519 --> 00:30:06.480
Yeah Samara.
00:30:07.359 --> 00:30:10.559
Um but well no, no, no, no, no.
00:30:10.720 --> 00:30:15.359
When she's she says I do mean to, I do intend to.
00:30:15.599 --> 00:30:15.759
Yeah.
00:30:15.920 --> 00:30:16.240
Yeah.
00:30:16.400 --> 00:30:19.359
She does intend to pass on the trauma and the pain.
00:30:19.519 --> 00:30:20.720
She wants to be heard.
00:30:21.359 --> 00:30:28.480
Um, but I think if she knew there was another way, she wouldn't want to, I guess is what I mean.
00:30:28.960 --> 00:30:34.559
If she knew there was another possibility, that she wouldn't want that for herself.
00:30:34.720 --> 00:30:35.759
She would want rest.
00:30:36.240 --> 00:30:40.720
I think we have to believe that to like keep our own hope.
00:30:42.799 --> 00:30:57.359
But I think that's part of even at the end, I think that's part of what makes the film so uncomfortable is you know, there's a moment where we believe that all she needed was to be heard, yeah, right.
00:30:57.680 --> 00:31:09.599
To be set free, and then found and discovered, and found and discovered and understood, right, and and and you're so right that would set her free, but it didn't.
00:31:09.920 --> 00:31:18.559
And that I think was the most terrifying piece because don't we want to believe that that's enough?
00:31:18.799 --> 00:31:32.160
That that's enough, and that that that anyone can can really be like loved and understood out of their ability or propensity to inflict violence.
00:31:32.559 --> 00:31:34.400
Yeah, that's right.
00:31:34.559 --> 00:31:36.400
And it's just you're so right.
00:31:38.000 --> 00:31:38.880
What does that mean?
00:31:39.440 --> 00:31:39.680
Scary.
00:31:39.839 --> 00:31:40.799
Yeah, it is scary.
00:31:41.759 --> 00:31:49.200
Is our I mean, is that just something innate in us to I mean, yeah, hurt people hurt, bullies are bullied, right?
00:31:49.359 --> 00:32:00.240
Like um it's just and when you don't know better, like Rachel, for example, Rachel thinks she figured it.
00:32:00.319 --> 00:32:12.079
She we she we think she found the way, but then when she realizes she didn't, um then now she's like desperate to save her son.
00:32:12.319 --> 00:32:12.880
Right.
00:32:13.200 --> 00:32:27.920
And there is not time, and she doesn't know any other way, and so her only option is to help him like inflict more violence onto whoever the next person is.
00:32:28.079 --> 00:32:30.960
I mean, he even asked, so what happens to the next person?
00:32:31.359 --> 00:32:32.799
But it's like, I don't care.
00:32:32.960 --> 00:32:46.480
Yeah, like at some point when we don't know and we don't have these answers, there is a certain necessity, and I think we all hold it in us to like when survival is on the line or the survival of the people that we love.
00:32:47.039 --> 00:32:52.400
I don't know if there's many limits to what we uh are willing to do.
00:32:52.720 --> 00:32:55.200
Yeah, it reminds me of this ethical conundrum.
00:32:55.279 --> 00:33:03.680
There's like another, it's not it's a conundrum in that we there's there's care ethics, which is the idea of like, have you heard of care ethics?
00:33:03.839 --> 00:33:20.319
Like, this is how innately women make moral decisions, and we will prioritize the safety of our family unit over the greater good.
00:33:20.960 --> 00:33:21.839
And that is okay.
00:33:22.000 --> 00:33:26.079
That is part of according to this like branch of philosophy, yeah.
00:33:26.240 --> 00:33:28.799
That's okay, that's part of why we've survived.
00:33:28.960 --> 00:33:30.400
Yeah, that's part of the story.
00:33:30.559 --> 00:33:41.920
Yeah, um, whereas like the justice ethics, um, and I have not revisited these these terms in a long time, but this is more like it's it's the trolley problem in ethics.
00:33:42.079 --> 00:33:53.119
Like you choose the the one that you know yeah, or you you will sacrifice one for the great for the good for many, and that's justifiable.
00:33:53.359 --> 00:33:54.160
That's okay.
00:33:54.799 --> 00:34:04.240
Um, but again, the the woman will, you know, um, or the maternal figure in the in the in the place will protect the child the child first.
00:34:04.559 --> 00:34:06.079
Well sacrifice the many for the one.
00:34:06.319 --> 00:34:06.640
Yes.
00:34:06.799 --> 00:34:07.839
Yeah, exactly.
00:34:08.000 --> 00:34:09.280
Yeah, exactly.
00:34:09.440 --> 00:34:16.079
Um, so just a little ethical conundrum of like what to do, you know, and uh was that the right choice?
00:34:16.239 --> 00:34:19.840
Or do you make your own, do you are you the last one?
00:34:19.920 --> 00:34:25.119
Do you let yourself die um in order to protect the rest of the world, or do you continue it?
00:34:25.280 --> 00:34:29.920
And I just I think she made the decision I would have made as a mom.
00:34:30.159 --> 00:34:30.480
Yeah.
00:34:30.960 --> 00:34:40.639
But um, and that's that's the beauty of like right, like both energies and why there's why it's so important to the bigger picture of in our survival.
00:34:40.800 --> 00:34:40.960
Yeah.
00:34:41.360 --> 00:34:53.119
We need both both decisions, both options, and then we need to have the agency to to think uh specifically in a moment too, and make a third option, you know, um, and think creatively.
00:34:53.440 --> 00:35:04.960
But um I just think about like the generational curses, like the things we just pass on and pass on, and the cycles we try to break that we've inherited from our parents.
00:35:05.679 --> 00:35:15.840
Um and uh and it's it's kind of just a never-ending thing to to the ring's point.
00:35:16.559 --> 00:35:21.840
It's a never-ending thing, and it is just part of the collective.
00:35:24.000 --> 00:35:28.480
As Rachel does, and yet she still passes this on to her son.
00:35:28.639 --> 00:35:30.400
And the whole she's aware, I think.
00:35:30.559 --> 00:35:31.519
Yeah, she's aware, yeah.
00:35:31.679 --> 00:35:55.440
And I hope, I I think the hope is that, or at least the hope that I ended up noticing in myself was that maybe he will have a certain commitment throughout his life to figure out how to actually resolve this rather than resigning to this perpetual passing down.
00:35:55.840 --> 00:35:56.320
Yeah.
00:35:56.559 --> 00:36:05.360
Um I had the idea, and I almost feel bad for this, was like showing it to someone who it just does not serve society.
00:36:05.519 --> 00:36:05.920
Uh-huh.
00:36:06.079 --> 00:36:06.400
You know?
00:36:06.480 --> 00:36:06.800
Uh-huh.
00:36:06.960 --> 00:36:07.679
Do you know what I mean?
00:36:07.840 --> 00:36:07.920
Yeah.
00:36:08.000 --> 00:36:09.599
And they're like, okay, that's where we're gonna end.
00:36:09.760 --> 00:36:11.679
Yeah, and that's where it'll end, and then let them die, and then we're done.
00:36:11.920 --> 00:36:12.320
And then we're done.
00:36:13.039 --> 00:36:13.840
I got an answer.
00:36:14.079 --> 00:36:14.880
Right, right.
00:36:15.119 --> 00:36:18.639
Um or then I thought, okay, this is just an initiation.
00:36:18.800 --> 00:36:24.239
Everybody in the society watches it and then gives it to the next person, and then everybody has to watch it.
00:36:24.880 --> 00:36:30.320
Oh, and then we all you all survive, but we all hold, yeah, we all hold the burden of it.
00:36:30.639 --> 00:36:32.000
Yeah, interesting.
00:36:32.320 --> 00:36:37.039
Um, and it doesn't have to be scapegoated onto one person.
00:36:37.440 --> 00:36:49.679
But I think it tells us also that like trauma, the desire to hurt um others, so it is a way to normalize our own trauma.
00:36:49.920 --> 00:36:50.880
That's why we do it.
00:36:51.360 --> 00:36:55.199
And that is just part of us.
00:36:55.360 --> 00:36:56.960
Yeah, it's just part of what we do.
00:36:57.119 --> 00:36:59.280
Just like magical thinking is just part of what we do.
00:37:00.159 --> 00:37:06.239
Like, it's just in our nature, and that's why these movies are so great and they tell us so much about our nature.
00:37:06.320 --> 00:37:06.639
Yeah.
00:37:06.960 --> 00:37:22.079
Um, there was a reference in um in Backrooms where the scientist's family, yeah, they're watching a movie, and then he sees a cart, and then he sees the commercial of Captain Clark, you know.
00:37:22.320 --> 00:37:24.639
The movie they're watching is never ending story.
00:37:25.119 --> 00:37:26.159
Oh, is it?
00:37:27.119 --> 00:37:28.719
I love that you notice these details.
00:37:29.039 --> 00:37:29.519
Yes, yes.
00:37:29.599 --> 00:37:31.360
I mean, it's never ending story.
00:37:31.519 --> 00:37:33.280
It's just one of my favorite movies of all time.
00:37:33.599 --> 00:37:51.440
And um it just thought it was just so and I'm I'm digging, I'm really reaching here, but I just I just thought it was so funny of like the the this is the never-ending story, the the shadows that we we hide, that we bury, um, like Clark does.
00:37:51.599 --> 00:37:55.840
Um, the cautionary tale of the shadow winning, yeah, like Clark's situation.
00:37:55.920 --> 00:37:57.920
Captain Captain Clark, Captain Clark winning.
00:37:58.480 --> 00:38:07.119
Um the of course, um, in the ring as well, that just the perpetuating, like it just it never ends.
00:38:07.199 --> 00:38:10.480
It's just part of the way things are.
00:38:10.639 --> 00:38:14.159
And I think we we some lessons we learn and we move on.
00:38:14.239 --> 00:38:20.320
We've talked about this before, but also um some of it we it's just a continual, you know, just continuous work.
00:38:21.199 --> 00:38:21.599
Yeah, yeah.
00:38:21.760 --> 00:38:24.639
And like for Mary, she's she's working on that.
00:38:24.800 --> 00:38:36.239
She's a she's a therapist, yeah, and she's working on her childhood trauma the entire time and to the point where she's holding on to a relic of her past, literally, while she's in the back rooms.
00:38:36.800 --> 00:38:49.519
Um, and she uses it, she weaponizes it to protect herself, which is that was a great allegory for um using our past experiences to help us survive in the present.
00:38:50.320 --> 00:38:54.639
Like we developed those strategies for a reason they're effective.
00:38:54.960 --> 00:38:56.079
They're effective.
00:38:56.559 --> 00:39:04.880
Um I've been noticing how sensitive I am lately to like to just some friendships.
00:39:05.039 --> 00:39:22.559
Um, I was thinking about my younger sister and um just other just feeling like God, I'm just so so sensitive, and then I just feel like hurt, and then like I just have this wall just wants to come up so
quickly in those scenarios.
00:39:23.440 --> 00:39:34.480
Um because my little brand of trauma from a kid was abandonment and neglect, and plus physical uh abuse, violence.
00:39:34.800 --> 00:39:38.000
And so I'm just so quick to go go there.
00:39:38.079 --> 00:39:51.199
Like it's just it's it's one of those things where I was just journaling and writing about it, just like I'm noticing that interesting, like the walls are coming up quick still.
00:39:51.360 --> 00:39:51.760
Uh-huh.
00:39:51.920 --> 00:39:55.360
Whoa, I thought we've worked on this, but it's a never-ending story.
00:39:55.599 --> 00:39:55.920
It is.
00:39:56.079 --> 00:40:02.960
It just new triggers happen that create old, you know, that cause old behaviors to come back up.
00:40:03.199 --> 00:40:23.679
And there's a certain amount of working through with each new relationship, and then even with the same person and each changing season, it is kind of a re like a revisiting often that that has to happen, I think, to to rebuild this sort of sense of of safety.
00:40:23.840 --> 00:40:24.079
Yeah.
00:40:24.480 --> 00:40:26.960
Like I matter enough to you.
00:40:27.280 --> 00:40:34.400
It's like Mary's copy at the end that's stuck and it's in this traumatic pose, and it's like that will always kind of be there.
00:40:34.559 --> 00:40:35.519
That'll always be there.
00:40:35.679 --> 00:40:36.079
Yeah.
00:40:36.239 --> 00:40:36.719
You know?
00:40:37.119 --> 00:40:37.840
And yeah.
00:40:38.079 --> 00:40:42.719
So I've got this like thing with backrooms, and I want to run it by you.
00:40:42.880 --> 00:40:52.000
I I like to think about each of the characters as part of Clark's own psyche.
00:40:52.239 --> 00:40:52.639
Yes.
00:40:53.360 --> 00:40:56.400
And so play with me here.
00:40:57.280 --> 00:40:58.480
I think I know where you're going.
00:40:58.880 --> 00:41:05.039
I, you know, we have most clearly Captain Clark as Clark's shadow.
00:41:06.320 --> 00:41:17.599
He's scary, he's wild, he's, you know, messy, and um he may not be all that bad, we find out.
00:41:18.239 --> 00:41:21.519
Um, but he's definitely been banished down there.
00:41:21.679 --> 00:41:22.320
Yeah.
00:41:22.960 --> 00:41:26.960
We also have Kat and Bobby.
00:41:27.519 --> 00:41:31.199
And when I think about Kat and Bobby as they exist in the back room.
00:41:31.440 --> 00:41:32.400
This is the young couple.
00:41:32.559 --> 00:41:33.119
This is the younger.
00:41:33.280 --> 00:41:36.159
This is the assistant manager and his and her girl boyfriend.
00:41:36.320 --> 00:41:36.719
Yes.
00:41:36.960 --> 00:41:37.519
Yeah.
00:41:37.760 --> 00:41:44.159
And I and I can't help but feel that they represent parts of Clark as well.
00:41:44.480 --> 00:41:48.320
I've heard you say this, and I love this idea so much.
00:41:48.480 --> 00:41:48.800
Yeah.
00:41:49.039 --> 00:41:49.679
I love it.
00:41:49.920 --> 00:41:55.280
So I wish I knew more about this idea and this concept of the anima.
00:41:55.920 --> 00:42:09.840
Um,
but at face value, what I understand about it is that the anima is part of ourselves that inhabits kind of the opposite gender or sexual role that we kind of that our ego tends to inhabit.
00:42:10.079 --> 00:42:16.079
So for Clark, I think Kat represents his anima or his inner feminine.
00:42:17.679 --> 00:42:24.719
And what we notice, like the big contrast at first, is when Clark goes to the back rooms, he just walks on in there.
00:42:24.880 --> 00:42:29.599
There are some disturbing things that he like he's disconnected from his intuition.
00:42:30.159 --> 00:42:33.920
Where I see Kat as being very connected to her intuition.
00:42:34.079 --> 00:42:37.119
She is weary about this adventure.
00:42:37.280 --> 00:42:41.599
She is taking in some of these things that don't feel right.
00:42:42.079 --> 00:42:45.599
And she's expressing those sentiments.
00:42:45.760 --> 00:43:01.760
And so I feel that part of Clark's descent into kind of being overwhelmed by his shadow is due to his, like, the distance that he has between him and his anima, his inner feminine.
00:43:01.840 --> 00:43:02.079
Yeah.
00:43:02.239 --> 00:43:22.880
I mean, the disdain that he has for his wife kind of shows you this disgust with feminine traits of dependence, of hope, even of maybe not realistic thinking, but a sort of magical um follow your dream sort of thing.
00:43:23.360 --> 00:43:24.639
Follow your gut back to the intuition.
00:43:24.880 --> 00:43:25.920
Follow your gut.
00:43:26.239 --> 00:43:36.800
And and and he is so turned off by it that I think he just completely expels it, which leads him vulnerable to being captured and stuck there.
00:43:37.280 --> 00:43:39.760
I mean, his own shadow just it kills him.
00:43:40.000 --> 00:43:40.559
Right.
00:43:40.960 --> 00:43:42.960
Um, I struggle with Bobby.
00:43:43.039 --> 00:43:45.679
I want to know, like, I'm like, is Bobby part of him?
00:43:46.559 --> 00:43:47.679
What do you think about Bobby?
00:43:47.760 --> 00:43:49.039
If we're gonna take that lens.
00:43:49.280 --> 00:43:54.719
Yeah, well, you've said too, where just the the youth, like the younger, right?
00:43:54.880 --> 00:43:59.039
Like the younger version of oneself back to like the the freedom.
00:43:59.280 --> 00:43:59.440
Yeah.
00:44:00.239 --> 00:44:00.559
Dreams.
00:44:00.639 --> 00:44:02.000
He's in he's a film student.
00:44:02.159 --> 00:44:07.840
He has to his he says at one point that the camera is kind of attached to him because it's attached to a student ID.
00:44:08.000 --> 00:44:08.159
Yeah.
00:44:08.320 --> 00:44:11.440
So we know he's in school for film, following his dreams.
00:44:11.599 --> 00:44:17.599
I mean, the most, oh my gosh, the most fantastical thing someone can do, and he's doing it.
00:44:17.920 --> 00:44:19.039
So not practical.
00:44:19.119 --> 00:44:19.840
And he's doing it.
00:44:20.079 --> 00:44:21.039
So not practical.
00:44:21.280 --> 00:44:42.000
And he's living this very, they allude to this very like luscious sensual relationship with Kat, which is like Clark's life is barren from that aliveness, that um like eroticism that Bobby gets to experience because he's somewhat connected to this like life-giving energy.
00:44:42.159 --> 00:44:42.639
Yeah.
00:44:42.800 --> 00:44:44.719
Um, and I think Clark's jealous.
00:44:44.880 --> 00:44:46.159
I think Clark's jealous too.
00:44:46.400 --> 00:44:46.880
So jealous.
00:44:47.039 --> 00:44:49.199
And when we find so he's willing to sacrifice him.
00:44:49.360 --> 00:44:49.760
Oh, definitely.
00:44:50.000 --> 00:44:50.559
Go down there.
00:44:50.719 --> 00:44:50.960
Yeah.
00:44:51.280 --> 00:45:02.320
And when we find her head in the fridge, cat's head in the fridge, he's like, I try to help her, but yeah, she's, you know, he really thinks his way, it's a solution, though he knows it's not even working for himself.
00:45:03.199 --> 00:45:14.159
And then he finds some relief in the idea of like, I don't need to change, I don't need to cultivate or integrate myself with the anima, with my uh with the inner child.
00:45:14.480 --> 00:45:15.840
My inner child, thank you.
00:45:16.000 --> 00:45:17.599
Um, I don't need to do any of that.
00:45:17.679 --> 00:45:17.920
No.
00:45:18.079 --> 00:45:22.000
Um, and he tells the shadow that, and then you know, his shadow takes over.
00:45:22.320 --> 00:45:22.960
Takes over.
00:45:23.280 --> 00:45:28.079
That's why I think, you know, we've talked before about why did Mary, Dr.
00:45:28.239 --> 00:45:30.239
Mary, why did she smile at the end?
00:45:30.480 --> 00:45:33.440
At the end where she's like, Well, can I leave?
00:45:33.760 --> 00:45:36.480
And they tell her, Well, it's not up to us.
00:45:36.639 --> 00:45:37.519
Do you remember this part?
00:45:37.679 --> 00:45:38.239
Yeah, oh yeah.
00:45:38.320 --> 00:45:39.440
And she does have that smile.
00:45:39.679 --> 00:45:40.960
And she kind of smirks.
00:45:41.119 --> 00:46:06.079
And and the way that I interpret it is that if we're going from this lens of they're all part of Clark's psyche, I think that that shows that if she gets to stay, maybe the smirk is maybe Clark is willing to keep a little part of what I've said, of what I've been able, some insight that I've been able to give to him.
00:46:06.159 --> 00:46:10.000
And that I think the smile is maybe there's still hope left for Clark.
00:46:10.239 --> 00:46:10.719
For Clark.
00:46:10.800 --> 00:46:10.960
Okay.
00:46:11.199 --> 00:46:11.679
For Clark.
00:46:12.239 --> 00:46:29.119
If he can integrate, or if he decides to retain some of Mary and his psyche and let it kind of ruminate there in the background, maybe there is still hope that he that he hasn't been banished down there forever.
00:46:29.280 --> 00:46:32.480
Maybe there is some possibility he could be redeemed.
00:46:32.559 --> 00:46:34.639
That's kind of how I would like to think about this.
00:46:35.360 --> 00:46:46.159
Um it's funny because the way you think about that, I'm I'm gonna do to you what you did to me
on the ring, where it's like, I don't think that is a possibility for Clark at all.
00:46:46.559 --> 00:46:56.000
Clark is gone, just like um, and then what's her name is uh Samara, where she really just wanted she wants to hurt.
00:46:56.159 --> 00:46:58.480
Yeah there is no redemption there.
00:46:58.639 --> 00:46:59.599
She's across that line.
00:46:59.760 --> 00:47:01.039
She's crossed that line.
00:47:02.079 --> 00:47:03.679
Clark has crossed that line.
00:47:03.920 --> 00:47:20.079
He's the cautionary tale, and Mary is the hope for us that she could she can run through and not stay, not befriend the shadow, but fight it and leave it.
00:47:20.159 --> 00:47:20.639
Yeah.
00:47:21.039 --> 00:47:23.679
Um and uh find a way out.
00:47:23.920 --> 00:47:25.119
Yes, yes.
00:47:25.360 --> 00:47:32.880
And leave leave the projection behind, acknowledging and knowing it's it's there, right?
00:47:33.039 --> 00:47:35.039
That's part of part of how it works.
00:47:35.199 --> 00:47:35.519
Yeah.
00:47:35.760 --> 00:47:39.199
But um, but I'll find the way out.
00:47:39.280 --> 00:47:44.400
And I and she looks back and uh when she's in this room, she hears the seagulls.
00:47:44.480 --> 00:47:46.000
You can hear the seagulls coming through.
00:47:46.079 --> 00:47:48.719
So I think that's an indication that she's back out.
00:47:48.960 --> 00:47:49.599
Actually out.
00:47:50.000 --> 00:47:50.800
Actually out.
00:47:51.039 --> 00:47:54.159
But she is confined with the scientist.
00:47:54.320 --> 00:47:57.440
It's not up to him if she's released or not.
00:47:57.599 --> 00:47:57.920
Yeah.
00:47:58.079 --> 00:48:04.400
I mean, this is has to be pretty traumatic given that she was trapped growing up in a home.
00:48:04.719 --> 00:48:06.159
Maybe that's part of her smile.
00:48:06.400 --> 00:48:06.639
Yeah.
00:48:06.800 --> 00:48:11.920
Maybe that is there's a certain comfort into like, oh no, I'm trapped again.
00:48:12.239 --> 00:48:12.559
Yeah.
00:48:12.880 --> 00:48:13.519
Could be that.
00:48:13.679 --> 00:48:14.079
I don't know.
00:48:14.320 --> 00:48:14.880
Exactly.
00:48:15.039 --> 00:48:15.360
Yeah.
00:48:15.599 --> 00:48:20.320
Um, but I like to think that she's gonna get out.
00:48:20.480 --> 00:48:27.840
That she's gonna help them understand how as much as she understands about the psyche, give them the information they need.
00:48:28.320 --> 00:48:34.000
Um, you know, bring bring the boon, the boon back to the community that she's been through this journey, this.
00:48:34.079 --> 00:48:39.599
And in an actual way, she's actually our protagonist because she's the one who's who's grown, who's changed.
00:48:39.920 --> 00:48:43.039
Clark doesn't change, so he's not our our real hero there.
00:48:43.360 --> 00:48:43.679
No.
00:48:44.079 --> 00:48:45.199
Um, she is.
00:48:46.400 --> 00:48:47.280
I love that.
00:48:47.440 --> 00:48:48.000
I'm with you.
00:48:48.159 --> 00:48:48.559
I agree.
00:48:48.719 --> 00:48:48.960
Yeah.
00:48:49.199 --> 00:48:49.679
You know, yeah.
00:48:49.840 --> 00:48:51.519
And what do we know about the hero's journey?
00:48:51.599 --> 00:48:56.800
At the end, you come back with some boon for your community, some some knowledge, some solution.
00:48:57.360 --> 00:48:58.960
So that's my hope for it.
00:48:59.119 --> 00:49:06.639
And I I mean, it's a horror, it's horror, it's thriller, so it could go all types of way, but it could.
00:49:06.800 --> 00:49:08.320
But um, I like to think of it that way.
00:49:08.480 --> 00:49:09.760
But I think we have to have that hope.
00:49:09.920 --> 00:49:13.119
I think, I mean, in the in the work that I do, I feel like I have to have that hope.
00:49:13.440 --> 00:49:13.920
Yeah.
00:49:14.159 --> 00:49:30.960
Um a belief that that things can change and that people can heal and that something else can be created out of some a life that is like really um colored by hurt and pain and trauma.
00:49:31.280 --> 00:49:32.159
Of course.
00:49:33.119 --> 00:49:41.519
And I yeah, I just I feel like I ha we have to believe that it's possible.
00:49:41.760 --> 00:50:00.320
And the horror that I think is being depicted across these films is that the reality is that many, many people don't get to make that full loop, do not end up accessing the ability to like integrate, to heal, to shift something meaningfully.
00:50:00.719 --> 00:50:06.800
Yeah, but instead they they get stuck in this perpetual loop of of human suffering.
00:50:07.760 --> 00:50:15.280
And then I wonder, then is the choice to like find some sort of meaning or beauty in that?
00:50:15.679 --> 00:50:22.880
Yeah, which we did tackle in our episode about the about Groundhog Day.
00:50:23.119 --> 00:50:29.280
Yes, yes, he lives in a loop, he finds meaning and purpose within the loop, and then that's how he transcends.
00:50:29.440 --> 00:50:30.239
That's how he can get out.
00:50:30.400 --> 00:50:32.639
That's how he gets out as he creates it.
00:50:33.199 --> 00:50:36.719
Um yeah, and that takes imagination.
00:50:37.280 --> 00:50:40.000
So is that if we're going back to the ring?
00:50:40.159 --> 00:50:40.400
Yeah.
00:50:40.639 --> 00:50:42.159
What's the the son's name?
00:50:42.400 --> 00:50:42.880
David.
00:50:43.119 --> 00:50:44.480
David, I think, yeah.
00:50:44.800 --> 00:50:56.400
Is that David's task then to make some meaning out of the loop that he has now been roped into and is also perpetuating.
00:50:56.719 --> 00:50:57.199
Yeah.
00:50:57.440 --> 00:51:06.159
I mean, it's different than the but I love that you're calling out David because it it falls on the next generation often, unfortunately.
00:51:06.320 --> 00:51:06.800
Yeah.
00:51:06.960 --> 00:51:09.280
Um to take just one half step.
00:51:09.440 --> 00:51:09.920
I'm further.
00:51:10.239 --> 00:51:11.039
I'm doing that, right?
00:51:11.119 --> 00:51:16.719
Like I feel like I took my parents took a step, I'm taking a step, we're all just that's the that's the work.
00:51:17.360 --> 00:51:24.400
It is on him, it is on
us and the next generation, and so on and so on.
00:51:24.559 --> 00:51:37.119
I mean, that's where change and growth happens on the whole uh that on that scale for humanity is like zooming out and seeing how far, how far we've come and how far we still need to go.
00:51:40.960 --> 00:51:41.679
Poor David.
00:51:41.840 --> 00:51:42.320
That's a lot.
00:51:43.280 --> 00:51:44.480
I don't want to deal with that.
00:51:45.039 --> 00:51:47.440
And he knows he feels that weight.
00:51:47.840 --> 00:51:48.719
He feels that weight.
00:51:48.880 --> 00:51:50.000
Yeah, he does.
00:51:50.159 --> 00:51:50.719
He does.
00:51:50.880 --> 00:51:51.920
It's so much.
00:51:52.079 --> 00:51:53.199
I remember seeing that movie.
00:51:53.360 --> 00:51:54.880
I saw it in the theater when it came out.
00:51:55.039 --> 00:51:55.519
Did you really?
00:51:55.679 --> 00:52:01.280
And I did not watch any more, any more scary movies for like the next decade after that.
00:52:01.599 --> 00:52:03.360
I was ruined after the ring.
00:52:03.599 --> 00:52:07.360
I what that was one of the first scary movies I remember watching.
00:52:07.679 --> 00:52:08.239
Oh, really?
00:52:08.719 --> 00:52:10.880
And I remember being terrified.
00:52:12.079 --> 00:52:14.320
And I find it interesting watching it today.
00:52:14.480 --> 00:52:16.719
I mean, I was probably a preteen when it came out.
00:52:16.800 --> 00:52:17.360
I don't remember.
00:52:17.599 --> 00:52:19.039
Do you remember do you know what year it came out?
00:52:19.199 --> 00:52:20.480
Yeah, I was in high school, I think.
00:52:20.639 --> 00:52:20.880
Okay.
00:52:21.119 --> 00:52:22.239
I don't know what year.
00:52:22.400 --> 00:52:23.519
Oh, it's 2002.
00:52:23.760 --> 00:52:24.239
2002.
00:52:24.320 --> 00:52:25.199
Okay, so it was 12.
00:52:25.360 --> 00:52:25.519
Yeah.
00:52:25.760 --> 00:52:26.000
12.
00:52:26.239 --> 00:52:26.880
You were 12?
00:52:27.119 --> 00:52:27.440
12.
00:52:27.599 --> 00:52:29.599
I was a sophomore, so whatever that is.
00:52:29.760 --> 00:52:30.719
Yeah, yeah.
00:52:31.679 --> 00:52:32.800
Like 15, 16, 16.
00:52:33.199 --> 00:52:33.679
16.
00:52:34.559 --> 00:52:34.880
Um.
00:52:37.119 --> 00:52:45.440
And I don't think I could see any of what we're looking at today from that, from the lens of when I was 12.
00:52:45.679 --> 00:52:46.639
I was just terrified.
00:52:46.960 --> 00:52:49.360
Oh my god, it must have been turning out of the face.
00:52:49.679 --> 00:52:50.000
Yeah.
00:52:50.320 --> 00:52:50.960
Me too.
00:52:51.280 --> 00:52:52.800
Of this girl who's gonna come out of the TV.
00:52:53.039 --> 00:52:56.800
Yeah, I was getting nothing but terror at 16 from this movie.
00:52:57.199 --> 00:52:58.800
But it is quite beautiful.
00:52:59.039 --> 00:53:18.800
One more thing to say about David, because it's just coming to me, is he when he is asked to perpetuate the violence of creating a copy, he is resigned to it, but his like loss of innocence happened far earlier.
00:53:19.280 --> 00:53:23.280
He was calling his mom Rachel from the beginning of the film.
00:53:23.679 --> 00:53:26.159
Which is oh yeah, her by her name.
00:53:26.400 --> 00:53:26.960
By her name.
00:53:27.199 --> 00:53:28.000
Yeah, you're right.
00:53:28.400 --> 00:53:30.800
He was last at school.
00:53:31.840 --> 00:53:42.239
She you you see how Rachel reacts, and you can tell she's she's preoccupied because of her own trauma and her own stuff.
00:53:42.400 --> 00:53:46.400
I mean, she's she walks into the school to come pick him up late.
00:53:46.480 --> 00:54:00.000
Yeah, she's yelling on the phone, and she's perpetuating a certain kind of violence there, and then you come in and she kind of dismisses his drawing that the teacher is trying to get her to like, can you look?
00:54:00.079 --> 00:54:00.639
Can you see him?
00:54:01.039 --> 00:54:02.239
And she's like, he's fine.
00:54:02.480 --> 00:54:04.320
He's fine, he's fine, he's fine.
00:54:04.559 --> 00:54:12.960
And so even when she ultimately learns this lesson of like some children, they I think she says, like, children.
00:54:13.119 --> 00:54:16.960
Um sometimes children yell, cry, or draw pictures.
00:54:17.199 --> 00:54:17.440
Right.
00:54:17.760 --> 00:54:20.800
And she can finally see, she like gets that insight.
00:54:20.960 --> 00:54:23.840
Yeah, but the damage has already been done to David.
00:54:24.079 --> 00:54:36.000
Like there can be some healing, but he he's his innocence had been lost like far before he was recruited to perpetuate more harm.
00:54:36.320 --> 00:54:36.800
That's good.
00:54:36.880 --> 00:54:37.679
I didn't even go there.
00:54:37.760 --> 00:54:40.800
Yeah, I didn't even I just thought it was strange he would call her Rachel.
00:54:40.960 --> 00:54:41.440
Yeah.
00:54:41.760 --> 00:54:42.639
But you're so right.
00:54:43.039 --> 00:54:44.480
Like she was a mother.
00:54:44.800 --> 00:54:46.000
No, not to him.
00:54:46.320 --> 00:54:47.679
A peer, maybe.
00:54:48.639 --> 00:54:48.880
Yeah.
00:54:49.119 --> 00:54:49.440
To him.
00:54:49.840 --> 00:54:56.079
He was grieving the loss of his cousin who dies at the beginning, um, who he adored.
00:54:57.039 --> 00:55:00.320
Um she seems un unaffected now.
00:55:00.559 --> 00:55:03.519
Yeah, unaffected and is not really helping him cook with grief.
00:55:04.559 --> 00:55:06.639
Yeah, it's inconvenient for her phone calls.
00:55:06.880 --> 00:55:08.800
Yeah, yeah, that she has to take on this.
00:55:08.960 --> 00:55:09.599
They're very important.
00:55:09.920 --> 00:55:11.599
You know, important journalism things.
00:55:11.920 --> 00:55:12.239
Right.
00:55:12.480 --> 00:55:14.400
But at the end, she's willing to take the day off.
00:55:14.480 --> 00:55:15.519
Don't you have to go into work?
00:55:15.679 --> 00:55:16.079
Not today.
00:55:16.320 --> 00:55:16.960
Yeah, not today.
00:55:17.039 --> 00:55:17.360
You're right.
00:55:17.440 --> 00:55:19.119
So she she is our hero there.
00:55:19.280 --> 00:55:19.599
Yeah.
00:55:19.840 --> 00:55:25.119
She does grow and change, um, where she does become a better mom out of it.
00:55:25.920 --> 00:55:27.360
She becomes beautiful.
00:55:27.519 --> 00:55:28.320
It is beautiful.
00:55:28.480 --> 00:55:30.880
She learns how to attach and connect with him.
00:55:31.519 --> 00:55:46.960
Which, like, I think maybe that is their there is there's some hope that she may have not solved all of the problems, but at least now David has an attuned present mother, and there could be some some improvement or reconciliation within the relationship.
00:55:47.280 --> 00:55:50.559
And maybe then David can take that next step.
00:55:50.880 --> 00:55:53.199
I will take hope wherever I can find it.
00:55:53.440 --> 00:55:56.880
That sounds like a good good ending.
00:55:57.840 --> 00:55:58.880
Yeah, I love.
00:55:59.360 --> 00:56:00.400
Well, this is fun.
00:56:00.559 --> 00:56:01.119
This was fun.
00:56:01.440 --> 00:56:02.320
Good place to end, yeah.
00:56:02.559 --> 00:56:03.519
Hope yeah.
00:56:04.400 --> 00:56:05.440
From horror to hope.
00:56:05.760 --> 00:56:06.719
From horror to hope.
00:56:06.880 --> 00:56:07.599
How good.
00:56:08.960 --> 00:56:09.440
Cool.
00:56:10.239 --> 00:56:10.639
Cheers.