התמלול המלא של No Sleep

83 00:04:12,960 --> 00:04:19,200 need to process all of this, new information. And in the 84 00:04:19,200 --> 00:04:23,035 meantime, let's put this kid away and not worry about it. 85 00:04:23,035 --> 00:04:23,595 Yeah? 86 00:04:23,755 --> 00:04:24,475 Luisa: Yeah. 87 00:04:25,115 --> 00:04:28,715 Reina: Okay, putting you away, DNA kit, because we are not 88 00:04:28,715 --> 00:04:33,035 going fully Maury Povich today. Okay? Thank you. 89 00:04:33,275 --> 00:04:34,075 Bye bye. 90 00:04:34,155 --> 00:04:35,035 Luisa: Bye bye. 91 00:04:35,035 --> 00:04:35,595 Reina: Adios. 92 00:04:35,980 --> 00:04:42,460 Luisa: Smell you later. Maybe I should start seeing a therapist. 93 00:04:42,460 --> 00:04:43,260 Reina: Everyone should see 94 00:04:43,260 --> 00:04:46,780 a therapist, Lu. And it's always the people who need it the most 95 00:04:46,780 --> 00:04:47,420 who don't. 96 00:04:47,995 --> 00:04:53,115 I'm hinting. Hint. Hint. 97 00:04:54,475 --> 00:04:57,755 Luisa: Years ago, I casually told Patti that I was thinking 98 00:04:57,755 --> 00:05:02,050 about seeing a therapist, and she said, why? What's wrong? 99 00:05:02,450 --> 00:05:06,610 And then proceeded to interrogate me. I think she 100 00:05:06,610 --> 00:05:10,290 thought I was depressed or I don't know. 101 00:05:10,450 --> 00:05:12,850 Reina: And that was before you knew all of this shit? 102 00:05:13,410 --> 00:05:14,130 Shit. 103 00:05:14,210 --> 00:05:16,450 Luisa: Exactly. You like your therapist? 104 00:05:16,625 --> 00:05:19,185 Reina: Love her. I can give you her contact info. 105 00:05:19,185 --> 00:05:31,000 Luisa: Yes. I would love a rec. Rei. What if Jim is my dad? Does 106 00:05:31,000 --> 00:05:32,040 my aunt know? 107 00:05:32,760 --> 00:05:34,520 Shit. Does Jim even know? 108 00:05:34,520 --> 00:05:35,560 Reina: Oh, right. 109 00:05:36,040 --> 00:05:40,200 Jesus. I still can't believe that Patti yanked your mom's 110 00:05:40,200 --> 00:05:40,360 hair 111 00:05:40,360 --> 00:05:41,560 out over a report card. 112 00:05:41,560 --> 00:05:41,960 Luisa: Right. 113 00:05:41,960 --> 00:05:43,320 Reina: Imagine if she knew about this whole thing. 114 00:05:43,845 --> 00:05:44,725 Luisa: Exactly. 115 00:05:45,205 --> 00:05:47,765 Reina: Don't get me wrong. I know Patti can be a bit spicy, 116 00:05:47,765 --> 00:05:49,685 but I didn't know she was ghost pepper. 117 00:05:49,845 --> 00:05:50,085 Luisa: Capsaicin. 118 00:05:50,805 --> 00:05:51,765 Cap a what now? 119 00:05:51,765 --> 00:05:52,085 Capsaicin. 120 00:05:53,365 --> 00:05:54,485 What's that? A pepper? 121 00:05:54,485 --> 00:05:57,125 I I think I don't know. I think so. It's like it's like the 122 00:05:57,125 --> 00:05:58,245 spiciest thing on earth. 123 00:05:58,245 --> 00:05:58,805 I don't know. 124 00:05:58,805 --> 00:06:00,140 Reina: I'm I'm gonna Google this later. 125 00:06:00,140 --> 00:06:01,500 Luisa: Yeah. Fact check me. 126 00:06:01,740 --> 00:06:04,860 Reina: Anyway, I

don't remember Patti ever showing, like, 127 00:06:05,820 --> 00:06:07,500 violent behaviors growing up. 128 00:06:07,500 --> 00:06:09,260 Luisa: Because she wasn't violent. 129 00:06:09,500 --> 00:06:11,100 Reina: I guess people can change. 130 00:06:11,260 --> 00:06:13,580 Luisa: They were in high school when that fight happened. Also, 131 00:06:13,945 --> 00:06:15,705 do siblings ever get along? 132 00:06:15,705 --> 00:06:17,145 Reina: You know, I don't get along with mine. 133 00:06:17,145 --> 00:06:27,640 Luisa: Exactly. God. What am I gonna do? If my mom and Jim, how 134 00:06:27,640 --> 00:06:29,720 could I ever look at my uncle the same? 135 00:06:32,520 --> 00:06:37,320 Reina: Look, Lu, when you first told me about these tapes, I was 136 00:06:37,320 --> 00:06:42,885 a little apprehensive. But I didn't say anything because I do 137 00:06:42,885 --> 00:06:47,125 think Debra's right. If there's anyone that deserves to hear 138 00:06:47,125 --> 00:06:52,645 those tapes, it's you. Obviously, I don't think either 139 00:06:52,645 --> 00:06:56,000 of us thought that these tapes were gonna spill the tea that 140 00:06:56,000 --> 00:07:01,680 they have spilt, but here we are. Lu, everything you hear on 141 00:07:01,680 --> 00:07:04,560 these tapes belongs to your mom. 142 00:07:05,200 --> 00:07:08,515 I'm not telling you to stop listening to them, but knowing 143 00:07:08,515 --> 00:07:13,395 what you know now, if you do keep on listening, then I think 144 00:07:13,395 --> 00:07:16,755 you're gonna have to be okay with keeping whatever you learn 145 00:07:16,755 --> 00:07:17,715 to yourself. 146 00:07:18,275 --> 00:07:21,395 Luisa: Yeah. Can't put her on blast. 147 00:07:21,795 --> 00:07:24,730 Reina: Don't blow up your mom's spot. What good would it do 148 00:07:24,730 --> 00:07:25,370 anyway? 149 00:07:25,610 --> 00:07:27,130 What's done is done. 150 00:07:28,010 --> 00:07:30,250 Luisa: Yeah. It is what it is. 151 00:07:30,490 --> 00:07:32,330 Reina: Yep. Hey. 152 00:07:32,490 --> 00:07:33,690 I love you, sissy. 153 00:07:33,850 --> 00:07:36,010 Luisa: Hey. I love you, sissy. 154 00:07:43,505 --> 00:07:45,425 Dr. Orion Office Admin: Dr. Selena Orion's office. 155 00:07:45,425 --> 00:07:49,825 Luisa: Hi. I was referred to Dr. Orion by my best friend, and I 156 00:07:49,825 --> 00:07:51,505 was hoping to schedule an appointment. 157 00:07:51,700 --> 00:07:53,540 Dr. Orion Office Admin: I'm sorry, ma'am. Doctor. Orion 158 00:07:53,540 --> 00:07:55,940 wouldn't be able to accept you since you're a friend of a 159 00:07:55,940 --> 00:07:56,340 patient. 160 00:07:56,340 --> 00:08:00,260 Luisa: Oh, oh, yes. Duh. Sorry. 161 00:08:00,260 --> 00:08:02,180 Dr. Orion Office Admin: Also, she's not accepting new clients 162 00:08:02,180 --> 00:08:02,980 at the moment. 163 00:08:03,460 --> 00:08:05,300 Luisa: Got it. Thank you anyway. 164 00:08:05,505 --> 00:08:06,945 Ronnie: Uh-huh. Bye bye. 165 00:08:13,905 --> 00:08:16,225 Valley Therapy: Hi. You've reached Valley Therapy. We are 166 00:08:16,225 --> 00:08:18,865 currently unable to take your call, but please leave a brief 167 00:08:18,865 --> 00:08:21,480 message after the tone, and our office will reach out to you as 168 00:08:21,480 --> 00:08:22,360 soon as possible. 169 00:08:23,320 --> 00:08:26,200 Automated Messages: Sorry, this voicemail inbox is full. 170 00:08:26,200 --> 00:08:26,760 Goodbye. 171 00:08:27,800 --> 00:08:28,440 Luisa: The hell? 172 00:08:31,000 --> 00:08:33,575 Automated Messages: You've reached Citrus Grove Therapy. 173 00:08:33,575 --> 00:08:36,455 Unfortunately, we are no longer operating in the Los Angeles... 174 00:08:36,455 --> 00:08:42,215 Hi. This is Doctor Jane Simpson... This is Anita Osorio 175 00:08:42,215 --> 00:08:44,055 with Sunflower Therapy... 176 00:08:44,935 --> 00:08:48,890 Annette: Hi. You've reached Annette. Hello? 177 00:08:49,130 --> 00:08:53,050 Luisa: Oh, a real person. Sorry. Hi. I thought you were gonna be 178 00:08:53,050 --> 00:08:57,530 another voicemail. Anyway, my name is Luisa, and I'm looking 179 00:08:57,530 --> 00:08:59,130 to start therapy. 180 00:09:00,165 --> 00:09:02,325 Are you taking new clients? 181 00:09:02,325 --> 00:09:03,365 Annette: Yes, I am. 182 00:09:03,525 --> 00:09:06,885 Luisa: Great. I'd love to start the process then. 183 00:09:06,885 --> 00:09:10,725 Annette: Fantastic. Just a bit of information for you before we 184 00:09:10,725 --> 00:09:15,810 get started. First, I don't accept insurance. My rate is 185 00:09:15,810 --> 00:09:16,770 300... 186 00:09:17,090 --> 00:09:18,690 Luisa: Mhmm. 300? 187 00:09:18,850 --> 00:09:19,650 Annette: An hour. 188 00:09:21,330 --> 00:09:24,130 Luisa: Do you happen to work on a sliding scale? 189 00:09:24,130 --> 00:09:24,850 Annette: No. 190 00:09:25,330 --> 00:09:30,045 Luisa: Oh, well, okay. I will figure something out then. 191 00:09:30,045 --> 00:09:32,845 Annette: Fantastic. For appointments, I only take 192 00:09:32,845 --> 00:09:36,525 clients on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays. Which of those 193 00:09:36,525 --> 00:09:37,885 are usually good for you? 194 00:09:39,085 --> 00:09:41,645 Luisa: Any of those, but afternoons are probably best for 195 00:09:41,645 --> 00:09:41,805 me. 196 00:09:42,000 --> 00:09:47,120 Annette: Okay. I'm looking at my schedule. How does the October 197 00:09:47,120 --> 00:09:48,320 28 look? 198 00:09:50,720 --> 00:09:55,120 Luisa: Did you mean to say did you mean to say September 28? 199 00:09:55,120 --> 00:09:56,480 Annette: No. October 28. 200 00:09:57,055 --> 00:09:58,815 Luisa: We're in August. 201 00:09:58,895 --> 00:10:00,655 Annette: I'm sorry. That's my first opening. 202 00:10:00,735 --> 00:10:02,655 Luisa: What if I needed something sooner? 203 00:10:03,615 --> 00:10:05,615 Annette: Are you having suicidal thoughts? 204 00:10:05,615 --> 00:10:06,255 Luisa: No. 205 00:10:06,415 --> 00:10:09,375

Annette: Because if you are experiencing suicidal thoughts 206 00:10:09,615 --> 00:10:11,775 Luisa: I'm not having suicidal thoughts. 207 00:10:12,870 --> 00:10:13,670 Annette: Fantastic. 208 00:10:14,870 --> 00:10:18,310 Luisa: Okay. Say I book that date. What am I supposed to do 209 00:10:18,310 --> 00:10:20,230 in the next two months? 210 00:10:20,310 --> 00:10:22,550 Annette: I could recommend some reading material. 211 00:10:22,790 --> 00:10:23,750 Luisa: Reading material? 212 00:10:23,750 --> 00:10:24,070 Annette: Yes. 213 00:10:25,125 --> 00:10:27,045 Luisa: Could you recommend another therapist? 214 00:10:27,045 --> 00:10:28,085 Annette: I'm sorry. No. 215 00:10:28,085 --> 00:10:28,805 Luisa: Okay. 216 00:10:29,285 --> 00:10:31,045 Annette: I can take down your info and let you know if 217 00:10:31,045 --> 00:10:32,085 something opens up. 218 00:10:32,725 --> 00:10:38,005 Luisa: Yeah. You know what? No. I'm all set. Thank you. 219 00:10:38,360 --> 00:10:39,480 Annette: Fantastic. 220 00:10:39,480 --> 00:10:43,960 Luisa: Fantastic. God, no wonder everyone's crazy. 221 00:10:50,685 --> 00:10:57,565 Sherry: It's 02:53AM, and I'm wide awake. Deb gave me these 222 00:10:57,565 --> 00:11:01,245 sleeping pills, but, well, they don't seem to be working, do 223 00:11:01,245 --> 00:11:13,820 they? I took them, oh, four hours ago. Meanwhile, Babalu's 224 00:11:13,820 --> 00:11:17,660 out like a light. Sleep when baby sleeps. 225 00:11:17,660 --> 00:11:25,375 Yeah. No shit. How did I someone who probably hasn't had a decent 226 00:11:25,375 --> 00:11:31,615 night's sleep in the last fifteen years, give birth to 227 00:11:31,615 --> 00:11:40,010 this angelic thing that just sleeps no problem. Sweet Babalu, 228 00:11:40,650 --> 00:11:45,930 she loves to sleep. Maybe she was just born that way. 229 00:11:48,995 --> 00:11:53,955 If only there was a pill that could turn off the voices in my 230 00:11:53,955 --> 00:11:57,475 head, but they can't even get sleeping pills right. So. 231 00:11:59,850 --> 00:12:01,450 I 232 00:12:05,770 --> 00:12:12,890 guess I could do some homework, or I could go soak in the tub. 233 00:12:14,235 --> 00:12:25,355 It's been a while since I've had a good soak. Let's see. Read 234 00:12:25,355 --> 00:12:30,930 pages 78 to 90, personality disorders. Ugh. 235 00:12:32,610 --> 00:12:37,890 Maybe later. Whose dumb idea was it to immediately go back to 236 00:12:37,890 --> 00:12:47,565 school after having a baby? Oh, yeah. Me. Oh, this is funny. 237 00:12:48,285 --> 00:12:52,845 I wrote down in my notes, "narcissistic personality 238 00:12:52,845 --> 00:13:01,900 disorder, ...Patti? Question mark. Or just a bitch? Question 239 00:13:01,900 --> 00:13:09,605 mark." Can't say if she's a bonafide narcissist, but she 240 00:13:09,605 --> 00:13:15,845 definitely loves to hear herself talk. Maybe some of us are just 241 00:13:15,845 --> 00:13:26,030 born broken. Yeah. I I think I'll go soak in the tub. 242 00:13:29,470 --> 00:13:34,750 Jim: So how's the short rib? 243 00:13:35,310 --> 00:13:36,830 Luisa: Oh, it's good. 244 00:13:37,485 --> 00:13:47,165 Jim: Yeah? Good. Yeah. I I understand. This this place is 245 00:13:47,165 --> 00:13:51,890 no Cheesecake Factory, but I thought it'd be nice to come 246 00:13:51,890 --> 00:13:52,450 here. 247 00:13:53,890 --> 00:14:01,010 You used to love this place. Oh, remember how you used to say, 248 00:14:01,330 --> 00:14:06,255 uncle, can we go to the fancy restaurant? Five years old, and 249 00:14:06,255 --> 00:14:19,135 your favorite restaurant was an old steakhouse. Yeah. Hon, how's 250 00:14:19,135 --> 00:14:19,615 your fish? 251 00:14:20,570 --> 00:14:22,250 Patti: Soggy, but good. 252 00:14:22,250 --> 00:14:24,970 Jim: Yeah. Good. Good. Glad my girls are good. 253 00:14:27,130 --> 00:14:30,570 Luisa: How's your steak, uncle? 254 00:14:31,770 --> 00:14:34,330 Jim: It's quite delicious, actually. 255 00:14:36,435 --> 00:14:37,955 Patti: Lulu, how's work? 256 00:14:38,835 --> 00:14:39,635 Luisa: Busy. 257 00:14:39,795 --> 00:14:40,995 Patti: Must be. 258 00:14:41,235 --> 00:14:43,235 We never see you anymore. 259 00:14:43,235 --> 00:14:49,795 Jim: We miss you, kid. So the memoir, it's going good? 260 00:14:50,035 --> 00:14:50,435 Luisa: Yep. 261 00:14:52,670 --> 00:14:56,670 Jim: I still can't believe you're working on a book about 262 00:14:56,670 --> 00:15:00,590 the Pine Street killings. I remember when that happened. It 263 00:15:00,590 --> 00:15:02,270 was all over the news. 264 00:15:02,270 --> 00:15:04,350 Luisa: Well, the book isn't about the killings. It's about 265 00:15:04,350 --> 00:15:05,150 the woman who survived. 266 00:15:05,515 --> 00:15:07,595 Jim: Yeah. Right. Of of course. 267 00:15:07,595 --> 00:15:10,475 Luisa: I actually just had my first meeting with her. 268 00:15:10,555 --> 00:15:12,475 Jim: Oh, yeah. How was that? 269 00:15:13,675 --> 00:15:15,435 Luisa: Pretty intimidating at first. 270 00:15:15,595 --> 00:15:17,355 Jim: Oh, how so? 271 00:15:18,680 --> 00:15:23,000 Luisa: She just tells it like she sees it. You know? There's 272 00:15:23,000 --> 00:15:27,480 no BS with her. For example, when we met, I said something 273 00:15:27,480 --> 00:15:31,160 like, oh, it's great to meet you. And her reply was, is it? 274 00:15:32,045 --> 00:15:35,005 And she said it as if it was a legitimate question. Is it great 275 00:15:35,005 --> 00:15:39,805 to meet me? Which caught me off guard, but she's got a point. 276 00:15:39,965 --> 00:15:43,565 Like, how many times do we go around saying niceties like, 277 00:15:43,565 --> 00:15:47,640 have a good day, and we don't even really mean it? We just say 278 00:15:47,640 --> 00:15:50,920 these things by rote because they've been programmed into us. 279 00:15:50,920 --> 00:15:58,440 So, yeah, I guess I appreciate your honesty. Honesty is, it's 280 00:15:58,440 --> 00:16:00,200 hard for a lot of people. 281

00:16:01,345 --> 00:16:02,945 Patti: I don't like this. 282 00:16:03,745 --> 00:16:04,785 Luisa: Don't like what? 283 00:16:04,945 --> 00:16:09,425 Patti: This woman. I don't like how she talked to you. What's 284 00:16:09,425 --> 00:16:12,385 wrong with saying, it's great to meet you? 285 00:16:12,625 --> 00:16:15,580 Luisa: Nothing, but that's not what she's trying 286 00:16:15,580 --> 00:16:17,180 Patti: You weren't pretending. 287 00:16:15,980 --> 00:16:16,060 Luisa: Say. 288 00:16:17,420 --> 00:16:19,820 Patti: You did think it was great to meet her. 289 00:16:19,820 --> 00:16:22,380 Luisa: But that's not the point that she's 290 00:16:22,220 --> 00:16:22,460 Patti: I 291 00:16:22,460 --> 00:16:26,940 think everyone should be kind to each other whenever possible. 292 00:16:27,465 --> 00:16:28,345 Jim: Hear, hear. 293 00:16:28,345 --> 00:16:30,905 Luisa: I don't necessarily disagree with 294 00:16:30,745 --> 00:16:35,865 Patti: Instead, people get mad just because you say, it's great 295 00:16:35,865 --> 00:16:40,105 to meet you. Why? To make you feel bad? 296 00:16:40,105 --> 00:16:41,945 Luisa: She didn't make me feel bad. 297 00:16:42,530 --> 00:16:46,370 Patti: Why couldn't she just say, thank you. It's nice to 298 00:16:46,370 --> 00:16:47,650 meet you too. 299 00:16:47,810 --> 00:16:49,650 Luisa: I don't care about that. 300 00:16:49,970 --> 00:16:53,410 Patti: Things would be a lot better in this world if we were 301 00:16:53,410 --> 00:16:58,365 more understanding and more kind to each other. What's so bad 302 00:16:58,365 --> 00:16:59,245 about that? 303 00:17:02,045 --> 00:17:03,965 Luisa: I couldn't agree more, auntie. 304 00:17:04,845 --> 00:17:10,050 Patti: Hopefully, you don't have to deal with her anymore. Finish 305 00:17:10,050 --> 00:17:13,970 her book and move on to publishing your own book. 306 00:17:14,850 --> 00:17:16,370 Luisa: Auntie, it's fine. 307 00:17:16,370 --> 00:17:18,290 Patti: It's not fine, Lulu. 308 00:17:19,090 --> 00:17:21,410 Luisa: Trust me. She deserves to question anything and 309 00:17:21,410 --> 00:17:24,530 everything. She's been through a lot. I mean a lot. 310 00:17:24,855 --> 00:17:28,055 Patti: We all experience pain, Luisa. 311 00:17:30,055 --> 00:17:31,335 Luisa: Ain't that the truth? 312 00:17:35,415 --> 00:17:39,415 Jim: So when are auntie and I getting a signed copy of the 313 00:17:39,415 --> 00:17:39,655 book? 314 00:17:40,820 --> 00:17:42,340 Luisa: I have to finish it first. 315 00:17:42,340 --> 00:17:45,620 Jim: Well, I want an advanced copy. 316 00:17:45,620 --> 00:17:47,220 Luisa: Yep. Will do. 317 00:17:47,300 --> 00:17:49,460 Jim: What's the next step in this whole thing? 318 00:17:49,700 --> 00:17:50,820 Luisa: Writing it. 319 00:17:51,140 --> 00:17:51,700 Jim: Right. 320 00:17:52,820 --> 00:17:57,955 Right. Well, I can't wait to read it. No no spoilers. 321 00:17:58,195 --> 00:17:59,635 Luisa: I would never. 322 00:18:00,995 --> 00:18:02,995 Patti: I'm going to the ladies' room. 323 00:18:03,715 --> 00:18:07,235 Luisa: What on earth was that? 324 00:18:07,315 --> 00:18:07,715 Jim: Hm? 325 00:18:09,870 --> 00:18:10,990 Luisa: That. Her outburst? 326 00:18:10,990 --> 00:18:13,950 Jim: Oh, that. Patti's been a bit stressed out. 327 00:18:14,430 --> 00:18:15,230 Luisa: A bit? 328 00:18:15,790 --> 00:18:18,190 Jim: It's been busy at the shop. That's all. 329 00:18:18,990 --> 00:18:19,950 Luisa: Okay. 330 00:18:22,110 --> 00:18:33,265 Jim: Lu. Listen. I am just I'm so proud of you, kid. Auntie 331 00:18:33,265 --> 00:18:37,025 too. We're both just so proud. 332 00:18:40,600 --> 00:18:41,480 Luisa: Are you? 333 00:18:43,880 --> 00:18:46,600 Jim: Is is that really a question? 334 00:18:47,240 --> 00:18:48,280 Luisa: Do 335 00:18:49,720 --> 00:18:51,400 you think my mom would be proud of me? 336 00:18:54,135 --> 00:18:58,215 Jim: Of course, Luisa. Of course. 337 00:18:59,095 --> 00:18:59,895 Luisa: Do 338 00:19:01,655 --> 00:19:04,695 you think my father would be proud of me? 339 00:19:09,550 --> 00:19:22,590 Jim: Your father. Luisa, I- Why are you- what's going on? 340 00:19:23,475 --> 00:19:27,555 Luisa: I've just been thinking a lot about my mom lately and her 341 00:19:27,555 --> 00:19:30,515 life and where I come from. 342 00:19:33,315 --> 00:19:38,435 Jim: Is it because of that woman, Debra? 343 00:19:40,570 --> 00:19:42,490 Luisa: So you do remember her? 344 00:19:44,330 --> 00:19:59,845 Jim: Luisa, your aunt, that period of time... look. This is 345 00:19:59,845 --> 00:20:06,965 something your aunt and I had... I know there's a lot you wish 346 00:20:06,965 --> 00:20:07,525 you knew. 347 00:20:07,525 --> 00:20:11,870 Patti: Who wants dessert? I walked by someone eating 348 00:20:11,870 --> 00:20:18,190 tiramisu. Looks good. I'm gonna get one of those. 349 00:20:24,035 --> 00:20:25,875 Luisa: Siri, read my text messages. 350 00:20:26,835 --> 00:20:30,835 Siri: Okay. New message from Trey. Trey says, so I hate to 351 00:20:30,835 --> 00:20:34,355 admit this, but I've never had Ethiopian, but I'd love to try 352 00:20:34,355 --> 00:20:35,875 it with you. How's Tuesday? 353 00:20:36,090 --> 00:20:37,530 Luisa: Would you like to reply? 354 00:20:37,530 --> 00:20:38,250 No. 355 00:20:38,490 --> 00:20:41,610 Siri: Trey says, I ate a Hot Pocket for dinner if that's any 356 00:20:41,610 --> 00:20:45,210 indication of the type of man I am. I'm troubled, but I want to 357 00:20:45,210 --> 00:20:47,370 change. These are my confessions. 358 00:20:47,370 --> 00:20:48,810 Would you like to reply? 359 00:20:49,210 --> 00:20:49,610 Luisa: No. 360 00:20:52,925 --> 00:20:54,765 Siri, send a new text message. 361 00:20:54,765 --> 00:20:56,765 Siri: Who do you want to send it to? 362 00:20:56,845 --> 00:20:57,645 Luisa: Trey. 363 00:20:57,645 --> 00:20:59,165 Siri: What do you want to say? 364 00:21:00,125 --> 00:21:04,445 Luisa: Nice Usher reference,

LOL, period. Man, now I want a 365 00:21:04,445 --> 00:21:07,600 pepperoni and cheese Hot Pocket. Thanks. Period. 366 00:21:08,160 --> 00:21:11,760 Siri: Your message to Trey says, Knight's other reference l o l. 367 00:21:11,760 --> 00:21:15,600 Man, now I want a pepperoni and cheese Hot Pocket. Thanks. 368 00:21:15,600 --> 00:21:16,800 Ready to send it? 369 00:21:16,800 --> 00:21:17,200 Luisa: No. 370 00:21:17,200 --> 00:21:19,680 Siri: No. Okay. What do you want to say? 371 00:21:20,265 --> 00:21:26,345 Luisa: Nice. Usher reference l o l period. Now I want a pepperoni 372 00:21:26,345 --> 00:21:28,905 and cheese Hot Pocket period. 373 00:21:28,985 --> 00:21:32,025 So thanks for planting that idea in my head. 374 00:21:32,025 --> 00:21:36,200 Siri: Your message to Trey says, nice user reference l o l. Now I 375 00:21:36,200 --> 00:21:39,640 want a pepperoni and cheese Hot Pocket, so thanks for planting 376 00:21:39,640 --> 00:21:42,040 that idea in my head. Ready to send it? 377 00:21:42,040 --> 00:21:43,640 Luisa: Oh my god. What the hell? 378 00:21:43,640 --> 00:21:44,760 No. 379 00:21:44,840 --> 00:21:46,840 Siri: Okay. What do you want to say? 380 00:21:48,905 --> 00:21:53,705 Luisa: I appreciate you sliding in an Usher reference, comma, 381 00:21:53,705 --> 00:21:57,945 well done, period. How did you know that I live for Hot 382 00:21:57,945 --> 00:22:02,265 Pockets, question mark? As for Tuesday, can I keep you posted, 383 00:22:02,610 --> 00:22:06,610 Question mark? I just have so much work to do on the memoir, 384 00:22:06,610 --> 00:22:09,650 and I gotta watch this docu series, which technically is 385 00:22:09,650 --> 00:22:13,090 only a few hours long, but it'll likely take me a few days to 386 00:22:13,090 --> 00:22:16,850 watch because I get scared easily. Period. 387 00:22:17,615 --> 00:22:20,655 These are my confessions. Ugh. No. No. No. 388 00:22:20,655 --> 00:22:21,695 No. This is way too long. 389 00:22:21,695 --> 00:22:24,895 Siri: Your message to Trey says, I appreciate you sliding your 390 00:22:24,895 --> 00:22:25,055 Luisa: No. 391 00:22:25,135 --> 00:22:25,855 Siri: Usher reference. 392 00:22:25,855 --> 00:22:27,775 Luisa: No. Cancel. Do not send. 393 00:22:28,015 --> 00:22:29,055 Do not not send. 394 00:22:28,975 --> 00:22:29,295 Siri: Pockets. 395 00:22:29,295 --> 00:22:30,095 Luisa: Siri, don't send. 396 00:22:30,175 --> 00:22:32,095 Siri: Okay. It's sent. 397 00:22:32,095 --> 00:22:32,815 Luisa: Goddamn it. 398 00:22:34,840 --> 00:22:40,440 Okay. All the lights are on. Doors are locked. Phone is 399 00:22:40,440 --> 00:22:45,400 silenced, so no one can startle the shit out of me. Alright. 400 00:22:46,475 --> 00:22:47,675 I think I'm ready. 401 00:23:02,540 --> 00:23:07,740 Detective Lavell: I've lost sleep over this case for thirty 402 00:23:07,740 --> 00:23:12,940 four years. You know, homicide detectives never stop thinking 403 00:23:12,940 --> 00:23:18,435 about their cases.

Even the ones that get solved, all of them, 404 00:23:19,235 --> 00:23:24,675 they consume you. That's just part of the job. When a case 405 00:23:24,675 --> 00:23:30,980 doesn't get closure, doesn't get solved, that's hell. 406 00:23:31,540 --> 00:23:42,205 It haunts you. I arrived on the scene around 2AM that night. It 407 00:23:42,205 --> 00:23:47,565 was a cool spring night. I actually remember how the air 408 00:23:47,565 --> 00:23:52,925 smelled. The entire street was lit up with sirens. 409 00:23:53,965 --> 00:24:02,180 But in the air, orange blossoms. All the trees on the block were 410 00:24:02,180 --> 00:24:10,020 in bloom. Before you could even walk into the house, you knew 411 00:24:10,020 --> 00:24:16,665 something horrific happened. You could see the blood trail 412 00:24:16,745 --> 00:24:22,025 running from the front door all the way to the neighbor's yard 413 00:24:22,025 --> 00:24:31,190 across the street, and then stepping into that house. Just 414 00:24:31,190 --> 00:24:32,550 indescribable. 415 00:24:35,350 --> 00:24:39,030 What happened that night to the Timmons family, I can only 416 00:24:39,030 --> 00:24:49,935 describe as pure evil, sadistic, haunting. Thirty four years 417 00:24:49,935 --> 00:24:52,895 without a single reliable suspect. 418 00:24:55,455 --> 00:24:56,015 How? 419 00:24:58,510 --> 00:24:59,950 What did we miss? 420 00:25:02,270 --> 00:25:06,990 Luisa: Okay, Lu. You can do this. You can do this. This is 421 00:25:07,630 --> 00:25:08,030 fine. 422 00:25:23,185 --> 00:25:24,785 Please, brain. 423 00:25:25,260 --> 00:25:32,460 Just let me go to sleep. 2:53? Fuck me. 424 00:25:52,270 --> 00:25:55,710 Sherry: [singing] I'm not the kind who likes to tell you just 425 00:25:55,710 --> 00:26:00,430 what you want me to... You're not the kind that needs to tell 426 00:26:00,430 --> 00:26:09,135 me... Oh, shit. 427 00:26:13,455 --> 00:26:16,335 Deb and I took the babies on a little road trip this past 428 00:26:16,335 --> 00:26:19,855 weekend. At first, I didn't wanna 429 00:26:19,855 --> 00:26:29,110 go, but Deb talked me into it. She's good at that. I'm glad she 430 00:26:29,110 --> 00:26:39,125 did. It was nice to get away from here. Really nice. 431 00:26:40,405 --> 00:26:48,550 But I think Deb needed it more than me. I forgot how quiet it 432 00:26:48,550 --> 00:26:56,310 gets at night out there. We heard coyotes howling and the 433 00:26:56,310 --> 00:27:05,135 stars were just incredible. It was hot as Hades though. On 434 00:27:05,135 --> 00:27:08,255 Sunday, we got up early so we can get a little stroll in 435 00:27:08,255 --> 00:27:10,015 before it got too hot. 436 00:27:10,495 --> 00:27:16,095 Babalu loved it. Her eyes were darting all around and Max kept 437 00:27:16,095 --> 00:27:22,300 pointing... "Mama, look. Mama, look." Deb's such a good mom. 438 00:27:23,660 --> 00:27:27,820 Both babies just looked around as if seeing for the first time. 439 00:27:28,940 --> 00:27:33,535 I remember being in awe too. The first time I went to Joshua 440 00:27:33,535 --> 00:27:39,295 Tree, I must have been like eight years old. Mom and dad 441 00:27:39,295 --> 00:27:42,255 loved road trips. I remember telling them how it looked like 442 00:27:42,255 --> 00:27:45,950 the Flintstones. Crazy thing happened though. 443 00:27:46,830 --> 00:27:51,630 As we made our way back to the car, we came across this large 444 00:27:51,630 --> 00:27:58,110 group of people, a search and rescue team. Deb asked them what 445 00:27:58,110 --> 00:28:04,965 was going on and they said a hiker was reported missing. He 446 00:28:04,965 --> 00:28:08,005 was supposed to be home about a week ago, but no one had heard 447 00:28:08,005 --> 00:28:11,925 from him. And they found his car still parked at one of the 448 00:28:11,925 --> 00:28:18,720 trailheads. They showed us his picture and asked if we had seen 449 00:28:18,720 --> 00:28:24,880 him or any random items strewn about, but we were no help. 450 00:28:24,960 --> 00:28:29,615 The picture they had of him, he was in a tux like it was his 451 00:28:29,615 --> 00:28:39,295 wedding photo or something. His face was beaming. Goddamn. One 452 00:28:39,295 --> 00:28:46,670 day, you're having the best day of your life. The next... I 453 00:28:46,670 --> 00:28:50,990 wonder if that hiker chose to go missing. 454 00:28:52,510 --> 00:29:00,165 Maybe he wanted to disappear. It's a kinder way to say 455 00:29:00,165 --> 00:29:07,285 goodbye. Go out into the desert on a hot day, take a purposeful 456 00:29:07,285 --> 00:29:14,380 wrong turn, find a good hiding spot, then let nature run its 457 00:29:14,380 --> 00:29:20,940 course. Your loved ones believe you went missing. Eventually, 458 00:29:21,580 --> 00:29:24,175 your body gets found, if it gets found. 459 00:29:24,735 --> 00:29:30,575 Everyone chalks it up to a tragic accident. The end. Only 460 00:29:30,575 --> 00:29:37,295 he knows the truth. And he'll take that with him to the grave 461 00:29:38,570 --> 00:29:44,890 or the next dimension or wherever we go. On the drive 462 00:29:44,890 --> 00:29:49,210 back to our motel, I told Debra my theory and how it was the 463 00:29:49,210 --> 00:29:50,855 perfect way to kill yourself. 464 00:29:51,255 --> 00:29:57,415 And she was like, don't talk like that. And then she 465 00:29:57,415 --> 00:30:04,615 got really quiet and she stayed quiet the rest of the car ride. 466 00:30:06,310 --> 00:30:12,310 Anyway, we get back to the motel and we get the babies ready for 467 00:30:12,310 --> 00:30:22,145 bed and she's still very quiet. But finally, she speaks and she 468 00:30:22,145 --> 00:30:30,065 says, she point blank says, "Sher, are you having suicidal 469 00:30:30,065 --> 00:30:36,260 thoughts?" I don't think anyone's ever asked me that 470 00:30:36,260 --> 00:30:46,275 before. Even after I tried... I vaguely remember dad calling 471 00:30:46,275 --> 00:30:52,755 911, but I don't

remember anything after that until I woke 472 00:30:52,755 --> 00:30:53,955 up in the hospital. 473 00:30:55,475 --> 00:31:00,115 Dad and Patti were there, and then we all went home. That was 474 00:31:00,115 --> 00:31:07,450 it. No one, not my family, not anyone at the hospital, ever 475 00:31:07,450 --> 00:31:13,495 asked me why I tried to swallow a bottle of pills, and we never 476 00:31:13,495 --> 00:31:19,735 spoke of it again. I think the only thing more shocking than 477 00:31:19,735 --> 00:31:25,015 Debra being the first person to ask me that question is that I 478 00:31:25,015 --> 00:31:29,410 answered honestly. I said, not right now. 479 00:31:31,970 --> 00:31:36,050 Another thing happened at the park. When we were walking along 480 00:31:36,050 --> 00:31:43,515 the trail, we saw this beautiful lizard of some sort. It was 481 00:31:43,515 --> 00:31:48,395 perfectly perched on this rock and it had its head pointed 482 00:31:48,395 --> 00:31:54,200 towards the sky absorbing the sun. We let the babies look at 483 00:31:54,200 --> 00:31:58,920 it for a bit and I swear, I thought I saw a smile on its 484 00:31:58,920 --> 00:32:08,825 little face as if it was happy. I couldn't believe how close it 485 00:32:08,825 --> 00:32:09,705 let us get. 486 00:32:11,305 --> 00:32:17,865 I think it liked our company. We eventually said our see you 487 00:32:17,865 --> 00:32:28,260 laters and walked off. But later on, when we were coming back 488 00:32:28,260 --> 00:32:32,660 down the trail, we saw this group of teenagers standing 489 00:32:32,660 --> 00:32:38,045 where we stood. One of them screamed and started thrashing 490 00:32:38,045 --> 00:32:42,685 around, and then all of them broke out laughing and ran off. 491 00:32:47,565 --> 00:32:50,045 And I just felt this dread. 492 00:32:53,800 --> 00:32:59,560 As we got close to the rock, I could see I could see the 493 00:32:59,560 --> 00:33:10,245 lizard. Its little body stomped to death on that very rock it 494 00:33:10,245 --> 00:33:18,005 was just sunbathing on. God. I wanted to kill those fucking 495 00:33:18,005 --> 00:33:24,200 shitheads. It just takes a few assholes to ruin everything. 496 00:34:31,475 --> 00:34:36,435 Gloria: Spock. Hush up now. That's Luisa. We know her. 497 00:34:36,435 --> 00:34:38,675 Luisa: Hey, Spock. Hey, Gloria. 498 00:34:39,235 --> 00:34:40,675 Gloria: Look what the cat dragged in. 499 00:34:40,675 --> 00:34:41,635 Luisa: I know. I'm sorry. 500 00:34:41,635 --> 00:34:42,880 I'm late. I tried calling 501 00:34:43,120 --> 00:34:45,280 Gloria: There's no point in calling. I never pick up. 502 00:34:45,360 --> 00:34:47,840 Luisa: Hey. You got a package. You want me to 503 00:34:47,840 --> 00:34:48,240 bring it in? 504 00:34:48,240 --> 00:34:48,800 Gloria: No. 505 00:34:49,040 --> 00:34:49,440 Luisa: No? 506 00:34:49,440 --> 00:34:50,640 Gloria: It's not mine. 507 00:34:50,960 --> 00:34:53,040 Luisa: But it's addressed to you. 508 00:34:53,040 --> 00:34:54,880 Gloria: I know what it is, and I don't want it. 509 00:34:55,200 --> 00:34:58,695 Luisa: What is it? Hi, Spock. How you doing, sweet boy? 510 00:34:58,695 --> 00:35:00,695 Gloria: Some weird shit from fans. 511 00:35:00,695 --> 00:35:01,895 Luisa: You get fan mail? 512 00:35:02,055 --> 00:35:05,335 Gloria: I didn't for a while, but now the show is out, I got 513 00:35:05,335 --> 00:35:07,895 these lunatics sending me all kinds of nonsense. 514 00:35:07,975 --> 00:35:08,615 Luisa: Anything good? 515 00:35:09,450 --> 00:35:12,410 Gloria: Some lady from Illinois sent me a candle, so that's 516 00:35:12,410 --> 00:35:13,450 nice, I suppose. 517 00:35:13,690 --> 00:35:15,610 Luisa: Maybe that package has something nice too. 518 00:35:15,610 --> 00:35:16,810 Gloria: I don't want it. 519 00:35:16,810 --> 00:35:17,930 Luisa: Okey doke. 520 00:35:18,730 --> 00:35:21,370 Gloria: You look like death warmed over. 521 00:35:21,755 --> 00:35:23,435 Luisa: Yeah. I didn't sleep well. 522 00:35:23,595 --> 00:35:24,635 Gloria: Rough night? 523 00:35:24,955 --> 00:35:26,395 Luisa: It's a long story. 524 00:35:26,875 --> 00:35:31,115 Gloria: Alright. Sit. I'll bring you some coffee. 525 00:35:31,115 --> 00:35:32,075 Luisa: Thank you. 526 00:35:34,715 --> 00:35:37,355 Oh, shoot. Is this the right tape? 527 00:35:37,820 --> 00:35:41,340 Sherry: The guy looked like a freaking alien. And to top 528 00:35:41,340 --> 00:35:45,100 things off, he was dressed just like Marvin the Martian with 529 00:35:45,100 --> 00:35:51,855 this god awful red and green ensemble. God. I'm so 530 00:35:51,855 --> 00:35:52,335 Gloria: Who's that? 531 00:35:52,415 --> 00:35:53,295 Sherry: Fucking tired 532 00:35:53,295 --> 00:35:53,455 of 533 00:35:53,535 --> 00:35:55,055 Luisa: Oh. That's my mom. 534 00:35:56,015 --> 00:35:58,495 Gloria: You have a tape of your mom talking? 535 00:35:58,655 --> 00:36:00,415 Luisa: I actually have quite a few. 536 00:36:01,135 --> 00:36:02,175 Gloria: What does she talk about? 537 00:36:03,870 --> 00:36:08,830 Luisa: All kinds of things, really. So between that and your 538 00:36:08,830 --> 00:36:12,430 new docuseries, I'm not exactly falling into a sweet slumber. 539 00:36:12,430 --> 00:36:13,950 Gloria: My new docuseries? 540 00:36:13,950 --> 00:36:14,350 Luisa: Yeah. 541 00:36:14,350 --> 00:36:16,670 The one, the on the linoleum floor. 542 00:36:16,670 --> 00:36:18,030 Gloria: That's not my docuseries. 543 00:36:19,235 --> 00:36:20,275 Luisa: I thought you were... 544 00:36:20,675 --> 00:36:23,155 Gloria: None of these shows or podcasts or docu whatever the 545 00:36:23,155 --> 00:36:31,235 hell are mine. They're sick fantasies created by sick people 546 00:36:31,235 --> 00:36:33,555 who want to help me tell my family's story. 547 00:36:34,370 --> 00:36:35,170 Please. 548 00:36:35,410 --> 00:36:37,010 Luisa: You're not involved at all? 549 00:36:37,170 --> 00:36:38,450 Gloria: Like it

would matter. 550 00:36:38,770 --> 00:36:40,130 Luisa: It matters to me. 551 00:36:40,770 --> 00:36:45,650 Oh, hey, I'm gonna start recording. Can I pour you a cup? 552 00:36:45,650 --> 00:36:46,530 Gloria: No, thanks. 553 00:36:47,995 --> 00:36:53,995 Luisa: Oh, blessed be the cup of Joe. Shit. 554 00:36:54,315 --> 00:37:02,350 I'm sorry. I'm sorry that, I don't know, you weren't involved 555 00:37:02,350 --> 00:37:07,950 in telling your own story. I've never understood the whole true 556 00:37:07,950 --> 00:37:15,195 crime thing. When I was a kid, I was sleeping over at a friend's 557 00:37:15,195 --> 00:37:19,915 house, and I went into the kitchen to get some Doritos. And 558 00:37:19,915 --> 00:37:24,715 her mom was watching an episode of, like, Forensic Folders, 559 00:37:24,795 --> 00:37:26,395 Files? Forensic. Forensic Files. 560 00:37:27,350 --> 00:37:32,630 Anyway, I went to the kitchen, grabbed the Cool Ranch. And as 561 00:37:32,630 --> 00:37:36,550 I'm walking back through the living room, there on the TV, 562 00:37:36,790 --> 00:37:43,505 mind you, they had a a gigantic TV, was a woman's dead body, 563 00:37:45,025 --> 00:37:53,690 like a real one. No blurring. No clever camera tricks. Just this 564 00:37:53,690 --> 00:37:57,210 woman's lifeless body on the side of the road. 565 00:37:59,690 --> 00:38:06,515 That image still haunts me to this day. Oh, and I haven't had 566 00:38:06,515 --> 00:38:08,275 a Cool Ranch Dorito since either. So. 567 00:38:13,155 --> 00:38:18,835 Gloria: Luisa, do you know what the news, the media, all these 568 00:38:18,340 --> 00:38:21,540 hobbyist detectives call my family's tragedy? 569 00:38:22,020 --> 00:38:24,580 The Pine Street murders? 570 00:38:24,660 --> 00:38:31,140 The Pine Street killings. The lives of four people, my entire 571 00:38:31,140 --> 00:38:36,835 family, summed up in a catchy name. They call it that because, 572 00:38:36,835 --> 00:38:41,315 well, we lived on Pine Street, and that just sounds so sweet, 573 00:38:41,795 --> 00:38:45,155 so suburban, so safe, 574 00:38:47,270 --> 00:38:47,670 so 575 00:38:47,670 --> 00:38:53,830 entertaining. The most asinine of these true crime shows are 576 00:38:53,830 --> 00:38:57,990 the ones that try to depict my family with these look alike two 577 00:38:57,990 --> 00:39:02,155 bit actors getting paid to say over the top nonsense written by 578 00:39:02,155 --> 00:39:09,995 crackpots who don't know shit about my family. I remember 579 00:39:09,995 --> 00:39:14,155 watching one of these trashy shows, and it was a reenactment 580 00:39:14,490 --> 00:39:20,490 of the day my family was killed. They have this hot young thang 581 00:39:20,490 --> 00:39:25,610 playing me, and it's following her day, my day, where I was 582 00:39:25,610 --> 00:39:31,355 apparently doing this, that, and the other. Anyway, it finally 583 00:39:31,355 --> 00:39:33,835 gets to the part in the story where I'm about to leave the 584 00:39:33,835 --> 00:39:35,035 house for the evening. 585 00:39:35,995 --> 00:39:40,155 And as I'm leaving the house, they show my mother coming to 586 00:39:40,155 --> 00:39:45,780 kiss me goodbye. And she says, I love you, honey. And then young 587 00:39:45,780 --> 00:39:52,340 hot thing says to her, I love you more, mom. Like some leave 588 00:39:52,340 --> 00:39:59,535 it to beaver shit. You know what really happened between me and 589 00:39:59,535 --> 00:40:00,655 my mom that night? 590 00:40:02,015 --> 00:40:08,255 Nothing. I didn't even see her. If I were to guess, she probably 591 00:40:08,255 --> 00:40:13,980 was in the backyard having a smoke. She loved her evening 592 00:40:13,980 --> 00:40:20,860 smokes. Now my dad, on the other hand, I knew he was in the 593 00:40:20,860 --> 00:40:21,580 garage. 594 00:40:22,060 --> 00:40:25,415 I could hear him in there, but I purposely walked in the other 595 00:40:25,415 --> 00:40:28,855 direction so he wouldn't see me and I wouldn't have to say 596 00:40:28,855 --> 00:40:32,695 anything about where I was going because I was on my way to see a 597 00:40:32,695 --> 00:40:41,660 boy. A boy I suppose I really liked at the time. Who knows? I 598 00:40:41,660 --> 00:40:46,060 can barely remember his face. No. 599 00:40:46,140 --> 00:40:52,220 There were no sweet goodbyes or sappy I love yous. I just left. 600 00:40:56,125 --> 00:41:02,205 Years ago, when my family story was aired on some podcast, I got 601 00:41:02,205 --> 00:41:05,725 a letter in the mail from some woman, and she says in this 602 00:41:05,725 --> 00:41:10,760 letter, I'm so sorry this happened to you, but please know 603 00:41:10,760 --> 00:41:13,560 this is all a part of God's plan. 604 00:41:14,520 --> 00:41:15,080 Luisa: What the 605 00:41:15,720 --> 00:41:22,520 Gloria: The irony. You see, these folks obsessed with all 606 00:41:22,520 --> 00:41:26,315 this true crime nonsense, they like it because it lets them 607 00:41:26,315 --> 00:41:27,355 play god. 608 00:41:27,675 --> 00:41:32,235 They get to bear witness to the horror you live through without 609 00:41:32,235 --> 00:41:36,315 any of the consequences. And then they get to decide whether 610 00:41:36,315 --> 00:41:43,070 or not you deserved to die. Pure entertainment. Anyway, I'm tired 611 00:41:43,070 --> 00:41:47,870 of talking about wait. You didn't you aren't recording this 612 00:41:47,870 --> 00:41:49,790 over your mom's tape, were you? 613 00:41:49,790 --> 00:41:51,070 Luisa: Oh. Oh, no. No. No. No. 614 00:41:51,070 --> 00:41:52,430 I put in a blank tape earlier. 615 00:41:52,430 --> 00:41:55,095 Gloria: Oh, thank goodness. Wouldn't want you to lose that. 616 00:41:55,095 --> 00:41:55,895 Luisa: Same. 617 00:41:57,015 --> 00:41:59,975 Gloria: Hey. You didn't get to finish the story about your 618 00:41:59,975 --> 00:42:00,855 rough night. 619 00:42:01,895 --> 00:42:05,815 Luisa: Honestly, it's a lot of backstory. Like, I could 620

00:42:05,815 --> 00:42:07,655 probably write my own memoir now. 621 00:42:10,840 --> 00:42:13,880 Gloria: Well, give me the cliff notes. 622 00:42:14,360 --> 00:42:20,200 Luisa: Okay. Well, long story short, I was given these tapes, 623 00:42:20,200 --> 00:42:22,840 like, a month ago from this woman who knew my mother before 624 00:42:22,840 --> 00:42:28,505 she died. And I'm sorry. My mom, she committed suicide a long 625 00:42:28,505 --> 00:42:30,345 time ago. I mean, I was a baby. 626 00:42:31,065 --> 00:42:34,985 So I was raised by my aunt, my mom's sister, and her husband, 627 00:42:34,985 --> 00:42:40,160 my uncle. And these tapes, they're like my mom's audio 628 00:42:40,160 --> 00:42:44,560 journal. And let's just say that my mom is showing me another 629 00:42:44,560 --> 00:42:46,320 side of my family that I didn't know about. 630 00:42:46,320 --> 00:42:48,160 Gloria: Don't beat around the bush. 631 00:42:48,320 --> 00:42:51,360 Luisa: It sounds like my uncle may have been in love with my 632 00:42:51,360 --> 00:42:57,115 mom or something. I grew up knowing nothing about my father, 633 00:42:57,115 --> 00:43:01,275 so it's possible that my uncle who raised me, who's married to 634 00:43:01,275 --> 00:43:05,275 my aunt, is my father. And that's just the tip of the 635 00:43:05,275 --> 00:43:06,075 iceberg. 636 00:43:06,555 --> 00:43:07,195 Gloria: Go on. 637 00:43:08,420 --> 00:43:10,740 Luisa: I don't know if you know this, but Asians tend to shame 638 00:43:10,740 --> 00:43:13,700 ourselves for literally anything, things that don't even 639 00:43:13,700 --> 00:43:16,900 matter. And because of that, you can bet that we are definitely 640 00:43:16,900 --> 00:43:20,340 not going to talk about anything remotely shameful or traumatic, 641 00:43:20,745 --> 00:43:24,905 so we tend to be quite skilled at hiding from the truth and 642 00:43:24,905 --> 00:43:29,705 hiding that truth from our loved ones. So I grew up not knowing 643 00:43:29,705 --> 00:43:35,240 shit about my mom because, you know, shame. But now I have 644 00:43:35,240 --> 00:43:40,120 these tapes, and they are giving me an opportunity to finally get 645 00:43:40,120 --> 00:43:41,080 to know her. 646 00:43:41,880 --> 00:43:43,160 Gloria: The real her? 647 00:43:43,240 --> 00:43:44,040 Yes. 648 00:43:44,440 --> 00:43:46,120 That's terrifying. 649 00:43:46,680 --> 00:43:47,480 Luisa: Yes. 650 00:43:49,080 --> 00:43:57,295 Gloria: How marvelous. It it's a rare gift, Luisa, to be able to 651 00:43:57,295 --> 00:44:01,855 know someone on that level, good, bad, ugly, in this world 652 00:44:01,855 --> 00:44:02,895 full of phonies. 653 00:44:03,800 --> 00:44:07,800 Luisa: I spent so much of my life not knowing anything about 654 00:44:07,800 --> 00:44:08,760 her life. 655 00:44:09,240 --> 00:44:10,760 Gloria: That's not your fault. 656 00:44:11,560 --> 00:44:12,760 Luisa: Maybe it is. 657 00:44:13,720 --> 00:44:16,120 Gloria: Your aunt and uncle, they're still with us? 658 00:44:16,385 --> 00:44:17,185 Luisa: Yeah. 659 00:44:17,345 --> 00:44:19,585 Gloria: And they've got their faculties? 660 00:44:19,585 --> 00:44:20,225 Luisa: Yeah. 661 00:44:20,465 --> 00:44:22,305 Gloria: And functioning mouths? 662 00:44:22,865 --> 00:44:23,665 Luisa: Yeah. 663 00:44:24,225 --> 00:44:27,585 Gloria: Good. They can talk, so get them to. 664 00:44:28,385 --> 00:44:28,785 Luisa: Right. 665 00:44:30,720 --> 00:44:35,680 But how? What? 666 00:44:36,240 --> 00:44:44,765 Gloria: You already know how to do that. Vulnerability. You're 667 00:44:44,765 --> 00:44:51,965 good at it. Your vulnerability with me has encouraged me to be 668 00:44:51,965 --> 00:44:53,565 vulnerable with you. 669 00:44:54,925 --> 00:44:56,205 You know what you're doing. 670 00:44:59,340 --> 00:45:01,340 Luisa: Siri, read my new text messages. 671 00:45:01,340 --> 00:45:05,020 Siri: Okay. New message from Trey. Trey says, if you want 672 00:45:05,020 --> 00:45:08,380 some company, I'd be down to watch the docuseries with you. 673 00:45:08,380 --> 00:45:09,980 I'm a bit of a true crime nerd. 674 00:45:10,185 --> 00:45:13,785 I know. I hate myself too. Would you like to reply? 675 00:45:14,185 --> 00:45:14,825 Luisa: No. 676 00:45:15,865 --> 00:45:16,665 Siri: Okay. 677 00:45:16,665 --> 00:45:20,265 New message from Trey. Trey says, I hope that didn't come 678 00:45:20,265 --> 00:45:24,080 off as creepy. Offering to come over. I swear I'm not a serial 679 00:45:24,080 --> 00:45:28,640 killer. Death face emoji, knife emoji, would you like to reply? 680 00:45:30,000 --> 00:45:30,960 Luisa: No. 681 00:45:30,960 --> 00:45:35,280 Siri: Okay, new message from Reina. Reina says, Yo mama, 682 00:45:35,280 --> 00:45:39,405 housewarming party is now on the twenty first at 6PM. Feel free 683 00:45:39,405 --> 00:45:42,285 to bring the new boy toy. Would you like to reply? 684 00:45:43,725 --> 00:45:44,205 Luisa: No. 685 00:45:48,940 --> 00:45:52,140 Sherry: So this asshole says to me, how about you mind your 686 00:45:52,140 --> 00:46:03,035 business? So I look up at him and say, "ET phone home." Man, I 687 00:46:03,035 --> 00:46:07,995 never seen Deb laugh so hard. She was literally crying tears. 688 00:46:08,635 --> 00:46:09,275 What? 689 00:46:09,515 --> 00:46:13,995 The guy looked like a freaking alien. And to top things off, he 690 00:46:13,995 --> 00:46:18,780 was dressed just like Marvin the Martian with this god awful red 691 00:46:18,780 --> 00:46:29,580 and green ensemble. God. I'm so fucking tired of men. I think 692 00:46:29,580 --> 00:46:30,300 I'm done. 693 00:46:34,395 --> 00:46:35,035 For good. 694 00:46:44,230 --> 00:46:45,270 Luisa: Why hello there. 695 00:46:45,270 --> 00:46:47,030 Trey: Why I come bearing gifts. 696 00:46:47,030 --> 00:46:48,470 Luisa: Oh, like? 697 00:46:48,870 --> 00:46:51,430 Trey: Just the finest assortment of snacks from 698 00:46:51,430 --> 00:46:52,310 Le Trader

Josef's. 699 00:46:53,270 --> 00:46:58,565 Luisa: Mhmm. Let me see. Buffalo chicken dip. Mhmm. 700 00:46:58,885 --> 00:47:04,725 Kettle corn. Mango slices. You did well, young sir. 701 00:47:04,725 --> 00:47:06,325 Trey: Oh I thought you would approve. 702 00:47:07,045 --> 00:47:08,965 Luisa: Leave your shoes anywhere near the door. 703 00:47:09,445 --> 00:47:11,205 Trey: This is a shoes off establishment? 704 00:47:11,790 --> 00:47:14,110 Luisa: This is an Asian household. What do you think? 705 00:47:14,350 --> 00:47:17,630 Trey: I think you'll think my feet stink and then never wanna 706 00:47:17,630 --> 00:47:18,350 see me again. 707 00:47:18,350 --> 00:47:19,870 Luisa: I think that's unlikely. 708 00:47:20,590 --> 00:47:22,110 Trey: Don't say I didn't warn you. 709 00:47:23,870 --> 00:47:26,755 Luisa: Oh my goodness. What is that stench? 710 00:47:26,755 --> 00:47:29,555 Trey: Hey. Funny. Now I feel exposed. 711 00:47:30,355 --> 00:47:32,195 Luisa: Exposed or free? 712 00:47:32,515 --> 00:47:34,195 Trey: Oh, you've given me a lot to think about. 713 00:47:34,355 --> 00:47:37,635 Luisa: Here. Let me give you the grand tour. There's not a whole 714 00:47:37,635 --> 00:47:42,460 lot to see. So here's the living room slash dining room, 715 00:47:42,460 --> 00:47:43,500 obviously. Sorry. 716 00:47:43,500 --> 00:47:44,460 It's a bit of a mess. 717 00:47:44,460 --> 00:47:45,820 Trey: Oh, nice gallery wall. 718 00:47:45,820 --> 00:47:49,420 Luisa: Thanks. I'm rather proud of it myself. Hot tip for art, 719 00:47:49,500 --> 00:47:50,220 Goodwill. 720 00:47:50,220 --> 00:47:52,755 Trey: Goodwill, the place for good art. 721 00:47:52,755 --> 00:47:57,715 Luisa: Uh-huh. And the kitchen. And the bathroom's right there. 722 00:47:57,715 --> 00:47:58,835 Trey: A decent place. 723 00:47:58,835 --> 00:48:00,035 Luisa: Yeah. Not too shabby. 724 00:48:00,035 --> 00:48:00,835 Trey: Not at all. 725 00:48:01,315 --> 00:48:02,595 Luisa: Oh, here. Let me take that. 726 00:48:02,595 --> 00:48:02,915 Trey: Right. 727 00:48:04,290 --> 00:48:05,970 So what are we watching? 728 00:48:06,210 --> 00:48:07,970 Luisa: On the Linoleum Floor. 729 00:48:08,050 --> 00:48:09,490 Trey: No way. I just queued that. 730 00:48:09,490 --> 00:48:11,730 It's, like, one of the top trending shows right now. 731 00:48:11,730 --> 00:48:14,690 Luisa: I tried giving it a watch, but I think I maybe made 732 00:48:14,690 --> 00:48:19,295 it half hour in. It's a pretty gnarly story. 733 00:48:19,295 --> 00:48:20,575 Trey: Well, it looks like it. 734 00:48:20,895 --> 00:48:24,895 Luisa: FYI, I'm gonna have every single light on. I hope that 735 00:48:24,895 --> 00:48:26,815 doesn't ruin your viewing experience. 736 00:48:27,295 --> 00:48:29,055 Trey: It does ruin my viewing experience. 737 00:48:29,055 --> 00:48:29,295 Luisa: Mhmm. 738 00:48:29,295 --> 00:48:30,975 Trey: But if it helps you sleep at night. 739 00:48:30,975 --> 00:48:31,375 Luisa: Thanks.

740 00:48:31,800 --> 00:48:34,280 Trey: It's cool you're working on the memoir for this lady. 741 00:48:34,680 --> 00:48:36,840 Luisa: Yeah. She's really cool, actually. 742 00:48:36,840 --> 00:48:40,120 Trey: I hope you'll let me see an early draft. You still owe me 743 00:48:40,120 --> 00:48:41,160 a poem. 744 00:48:41,160 --> 00:48:46,280 Luisa: Oh, yes. The poem that I'm totally going to write for 745 00:48:46,280 --> 00:48:46,840 you. 746 00:48:46,840 --> 00:48:49,945 Trey: Uh-huh. I'm never gonna get that poem, am I? 747 00:48:50,345 --> 00:48:52,265 Luisa: I wouldn't say never. 748 00:48:52,425 --> 00:48:56,585 Trey: That's what I get for baring my soul to you. 749 00:48:57,385 --> 00:48:58,585 Luisa: You're good at that. 750 00:48:58,585 --> 00:48:59,305 Trey: What? 751 00:48:59,625 --> 00:49:01,385 Luisa: Being open and vulnerable. 752 00:49:01,945 --> 00:49:02,425 Trey: Fuck. 753 00:49:03,160 --> 00:49:03,800 Luisa: What? 754 00:49:03,880 --> 00:49:06,040 Trey: I said too much on our first date. 755 00:49:06,040 --> 00:49:07,480 Luisa: No. No. No. No. No. 756 00:49:07,480 --> 00:49:15,080 Not at all. I mean it. You're good at being open, and I like 757 00:49:15,080 --> 00:49:19,965 that about you. Earlier today, Gloria, the subject of the 758 00:49:19,965 --> 00:49:26,445 memoir and the docuseries, she told me that I'm good at being 759 00:49:26,445 --> 00:49:30,205 vulnerable. And I was like, what? 760 00:49:30,445 --> 00:49:37,520 Me? But then I thought about it, and she's right. When it comes 761 00:49:37,520 --> 00:49:42,320 to my work, my writing, my freelance bullshit, I have no 762 00:49:42,320 --> 00:49:45,935 problem being vulnerable. I'm an open book. 763 00:49:45,935 --> 00:49:46,815 Trey: Pun intended? 764 00:49:46,815 --> 00:49:50,815 Luisa: Of course. But when it comes to the things that 765 00:49:50,815 --> 00:49:57,055 actually matter, the people that actually matter, I struggle. 766 00:49:57,375 --> 00:49:59,820 Trey: I get it. You know? As someone who speaks from 767 00:49:59,820 --> 00:50:03,740 experience, it's a process. I think what helped me the most 768 00:50:03,740 --> 00:50:06,140 was trying to understand why I was being so guarded. Like, 769 00:50:06,140 --> 00:50:07,740 what's the underlying reason? 770 00:50:08,300 --> 00:50:08,620 You know? 771 00:50:10,395 --> 00:50:10,875 Luisa: Yeah. 772 00:50:10,875 --> 00:50:12,795 Trey: This is gonna sound like some cheesy inspirational 773 00:50:12,795 --> 00:50:16,635 poster, but you just gotta take it one day at a time, one 774 00:50:16,635 --> 00:50:19,115 conversation at a time, one moment at a time. 775 00:50:19,515 --> 00:50:20,395 Luisa: You're right. 776 00:50:20,875 --> 00:50:23,355 That does sound like a cheesy inspirational poster. 777 00:50:24,430 --> 00:50:26,670 Trey: I've got that one hung up in my gallery wall. 778 00:50:27,310 --> 00:50:30,350 Luisa: Do you also have a sign that says live, laugh, love? 779 00:50:30,350 --> 00:50:31,310 Trey: Absolutely. 780 00:50:31,710 --> 00:50:32,510 Luisa: Wise words. 781 00:50:32,510 --> 00:50:34,910 Trey: Yes. I got the live and the laugh part down. 782 00:50:34,990 --> 00:50:35,790 Luisa: But not the love? 783 00:50:36,525 --> 00:50:37,485 Trey: Not quite. 784 00:50:37,645 --> 00:50:38,365 Luisa: Oh. 785 00:50:38,445 --> 00:50:40,445 Trey: But I'm hopeful. 786 00:50:40,445 --> 00:50:41,005 Luisa: Same. 787 00:50:44,205 --> 00:50:45,485 Pass me the buffalo dip? 788 00:50:45,485 --> 00:50:46,365 Trey: Yes, ma'am. 789 00:50:47,565 --> 00:50:51,210 Luisa: Okay. Shall we? 790 00:50:51,210 --> 00:50:52,330 Trey: Yes, ma'am. 791 00:50:53,210 --> 00:50:56,970 Luisa: Hey. By the way, Trey, thank you. 792 00:50:57,690 --> 00:50:59,930 Trey: No thanks needed. I was gonna watch this anyway. 793 00:50:59,930 --> 00:51:02,330 Luisa: No. No. Not about watching the show. I mean, yes, 794 00:51:02,330 --> 00:51:05,530 that too. But, I mean, thank you for your advice. 795 00:51:06,865 --> 00:51:10,705 Trey: You're welcome. Are you just stalling? 796 00:51:10,865 --> 00:51:13,745 Luisa: Yeah. I can do this. Right? 797 00:51:13,745 --> 00:51:15,905 Trey: I believe in you. Okay. 798 00:51:19,230 --> 00:51:20,030 Luisa: Let's do this. 799 00:51:35,225 --> 00:51:37,145 911 Operator: 911, what's your emergency? 800 00:51:37,145 --> 00:51:41,145 Neighbor: Oh God, hi, I need help. There's a woman on my 801 00:51:41,145 --> 00:51:45,545 lawn, an African American woman. She's covered in blood, she's 802 00:51:45,545 --> 00:51:46,185 not moving. 803 00:51:46,185 --> 00:51:47,305 911 Operator: What's your location ma'am? 804 00:51:48,440 --> 00:51:50,440 Neighbor: 1414 Pine Street. 805 00:51:50,440 --> 00:51:51,400 911 Operator: Is she conscious? 806 00:51:51,400 --> 00:51:54,520 Neighbor: I don't know. I mean, I saw her and then I ran back in 807 00:51:54,520 --> 00:51:56,120 to call. I think she's 808 00:51:57,160 --> 00:51:58,280 911 Operator: I'm dispatching an ambulance. 809 00:51:58,280 --> 00:52:00,760 Neighbor: I think she might be from a house across the street. 810 00:52:00,840 --> 00:52:03,065 There's an African American family who lives across the 811 00:52:03,065 --> 00:52:07,305 street and their front door is wide open. Oh please, get 812 00:52:07,305 --> 00:52:08,025 someone here. 813 00:52:08,025 --> 00:52:11,305 911 Operator: I'm dispatching emergency services ma'am. Is she 814 00:52:11,305 --> 00:52:12,105 still outside? 815 00:52:12,105 --> 00:52:12,905 Neighbor: Yes. 816 00:52:13,305 --> 00:52:14,905 911 Operator: Can you tell me what her injuries are? 817 00:52:14,905 --> 00:52:18,265 Neighbor: Well I don't know. I mean she had all this blood 818 00:52:17,970 --> 00:52:19,890 coming out of her. Oh my God. 819 00:52:19,890 --> 00:52:23,010 911 Operator: Ma'am, can you go back and check her pulse for me? 820 00:52:23,010 --> 00:52:24,610 Neighbor: I'm not going back out there.

821 00:52:24,610 --> 00:52:25,570 911 Operator: Is it unsafe? 822 00:52:25,570 --> 00:52:28,530 Neighbor: I'm not going back out there. 823 00:52:28,530 --> 00:52:30,290 911 Operator: Ma'am, if she's still conscious. 824 00:52:31,065 --> 00:52:38,185 Neighbor: Damn it. Jesus. Okay. Shit. Shit. 825 00:52:38,185 --> 00:52:40,185 Oh shit. Oh shit. Dear lord. Shit. 826 00:52:40,185 --> 00:52:40,665 911 Operator: Ma'am. 827 00:52:40,665 --> 00:52:42,585 Neighbor: Okay. Oh, you there? 828 00:52:42,585 --> 00:52:42,905 911 Operator: Yes- 829 00:52:55,065 --> 00:52:56,105 Neighbor: Oh God. 830 00:52:56,105 --> 00:52:57,625 911 Operator: Ma'am, did you get a pulse? 831 00:52:57,625 --> 00:53:04,025 Neighbor: I Is she There's cuts all over her body. 832 00:53:04,265 --> 00:53:12,660 Her throat, her arms, her chest. Oh God, oh God. She's dead. 833 00:53:12,900 --> 00:53:16,980 She's dead. Oh Lord Jesus, she's dead. 834 00:53:17,060 --> 00:53:19,975 911 Operator: Ma'am, take a deep breath. I have emergency 835 00:53:19,975 --> 00:53:21,175 services on the way. 836 00:53:21,175 --> 00:53:25,735 Neighbor: She's dead. Do you hear me? Oh, God. 837 00:53:26,055 --> 00:53:30,455 No. No. No. No. 838 00:53:36,890 --> 00:53:38,570 Trey: You sure you're gonna be alright? 839 00:53:40,170 --> 00:53:44,890 Luisa: No. Oh. But thank you for doing this with me. 840 00:53:45,050 --> 00:53:49,305 Trey: Thank you for having me. It was fun. I should 841 00:53:49,625 --> 00:53:54,585 Luisa: Oh, yeah. Those are some nice kicks, by the way. 842 00:53:54,585 --> 00:53:56,745 Trey: Oh, thank you. I'm a bit of a sneakerhead. 843 00:53:56,745 --> 00:53:57,705 Luisa: I see that. 844 00:53:59,705 --> 00:54:03,790 Trey: You know, you can always call or text me if you're 845 00:54:03,790 --> 00:54:05,310 feeling spooked. 846 00:54:05,310 --> 00:54:08,670 Luisa: Be careful. I have no shame taking people up on their 847 00:54:08,670 --> 00:54:09,230 offers. 848 00:54:09,230 --> 00:54:10,350 Trey: Well, I mean it. 849 00:54:10,590 --> 00:54:11,390 Luisa: I know. 850 00:54:12,750 --> 00:54:14,030 Trey: Would you wanna hang out again? 851 00:54:18,695 --> 00:54:20,855 Luisa: Yes. I would love that. 852 00:54:20,855 --> 00:54:26,615 Trey: Yeah. Cool. Great. I'll I will we'll talk and stuff. 853 00:54:28,620 --> 00:54:29,420 Luisa: Drive safe. 854 00:54:29,420 --> 00:54:29,740 Mhmm. 855 00:54:29,740 --> 00:54:33,260 Trey: You too. Yes. Will do. 856 00:54:38,780 --> 00:54:54,940 Luisa: Please, brain. Just let me go to sleep. 2:23... Fuck me. 857 00:54:58,220 --> 00:54:58,540 Fuck. 858 00:55:11,685 --> 00:55:19,285 Sherry: Remember being in awe too... The first time I went to 859 00:55:19,285 --> 00:55:27,580 Joshua Tree... We get back to the motel and we get the babies 860 00:55:27,580 --> 00:55:38,035 ready for bed... Those fucking shitheads... It just takes a few 861 00:55:38,035 --> 00:55:39,635 assholes to ruin everything... Huh? [Sherry hums a lullaby] 862 00:56:40,845 --> 00:56:41,885 Luisa: [crying] Good night, mom. 863 00:56:57,780 --> 00:57:02,660 What? Closed? Okay. 864 00:57:16,980 --> 00:57:19,540 Jim: You've reached the voicemail of James Helman. 865 00:57:19,540 --> 00:57:21,620 Please leave your message after the tone. 866 00:57:22,980 --> 00:57:27,140 Luisa: Hey, uncle. I'm just here at the shop, and it looks like 867 00:57:27,140 --> 00:57:35,515 you're closed. No one's here. Is everything okay? I I wanted to 868 00:57:35,515 --> 00:57:37,595 stop by and talk. 869 00:57:38,555 --> 00:57:44,395 I'm sorry about the other night. I'm just I have a lot of 870 00:57:44,395 --> 00:57:56,370 questions about everything, and I really need some answers. I 871 00:57:56,370 --> 00:58:02,685 know it's not easy for you or auntie to talk about her, but I 872 00:58:02,685 --> 00:58:13,485 need you to. I've needed you to for decades. So if there is 873 00:58:13,485 --> 00:58:21,290 anything that might be holding you back, please know I won't 874 00:58:21,290 --> 00:58:28,570 judge you or think differently of you or love you any less. 875 00:58:29,370 --> 00:58:35,375 Okay? I'll talk to you later. Love you uncle. 876 00:58:41,215 --> 00:58:43,375 Sherry: I'm running late to class, but I just had to 877 00:58:43,375 --> 00:58:49,140 document this. I'm pretty sure my Babalu said, mama, today. I 878 00:58:49,140 --> 00:58:51,860 put her down in her playpen for a second, and when I stepped 879 00:58:51,860 --> 00:58:56,980 away, I heard a little, mama. I came back around the corner, and 880 00:58:56,980 --> 00:59:00,735 she was just smiling at me like she knew what she had done too. 881 00:59:01,375 --> 00:59:01,935 Shit. 882 00:59:01,935 --> 00:59:10,175 I gotta go. Earlier today, I put Babalu down for a nap so I could 883 00:59:10,175 --> 00:59:14,200 get some homework done. But maybe thirty minutes later, I 884 00:59:14,200 --> 00:59:21,320 hear this faint giggle coming from the bedroom. So I peek in, 885 00:59:21,960 --> 00:59:28,265 and there's Luisa standing up in her crib facing the wall, 886 00:59:28,825 --> 00:59:34,025 laughing her little head off. I said, Babalu, what you laughing 887 00:59:34,025 --> 00:59:34,665 at? 888 00:59:34,825 --> 00:59:40,490 And she just kept staring at that wall, giggling. So I walk 889 00:59:40,490 --> 00:59:44,090 up right next to her crib to see what she's looking at, and of 890 00:59:44,090 --> 00:59:50,010 course, there's nothing there. Just the wall. But she was 891 00:59:50,010 --> 00:59:58,125 looking at something. Her eyes were locked on whatever it was, 892 00:59:59,405 --> 01:00:02,445 and it was making her hysterical. 893 01:00:03,805 --> 01:00:10,530 So I said, Babalu, who's there? And it was like she finally 894 01:00:10,530 --> 01:00:16,690 heard me, and she smiled and turned to me. But then she 895 01:00:16,690 --> 01:00:22,645 turned back to the wall, quiet. Her little eyes were looking all 896 01:00:22,645

--> 01:00:27,845 over the room as if she was trying to find something, 897 01:00:28,965 --> 01:00:35,445 someone. I picked her up and she tugged at me as if to say, mama, 898 01:00:35,445 --> 01:00:36,325 let's go look. 899 01:00:37,180 --> 01:00:41,180 So we go around the apartment, and she was so focused on trying 900 01:00:41,180 --> 01:00:47,340 to find whatever, whoever it was that she saw. I walked her all 901 01:00:47,340 --> 01:00:52,225 over the apartment, and she just looked up at me like, where did 902 01:00:52,225 --> 01:00:59,025 they go? Funny enough, my baby girl suddenly made me feel like 903 01:00:59,025 --> 01:01:09,800 I was sane. She's sensing it too. The last few weeks, I 904 01:01:09,800 --> 01:01:11,160 haven't felt right. 905 01:01:11,720 --> 01:01:17,480 I mean, when do I ever feel right? But I don't know. I'm, 906 01:01:17,480 --> 01:01:26,345 like, hearing things, but it's, like, in my head, but not in my 907 01:01:26,345 --> 01:01:34,585 head. I'm making no sense. Just something feels off. 908 01:01:36,660 --> 01:01:44,900 I feel off. Maybe I'm losing my mind. It does run-in the family. 909 01:01:46,660 --> 01:01:49,860 Maybe it's these sleeping pills fucking with my mind. 910 01:01:54,065 --> 01:01:54,865 Hello? 911 01:01:57,025 --> 01:02:06,770 Someone there? Were your ears burning? Do you wanna give me a 912 01:02:06,770 --> 01:02:12,530 sign that you're here? No? Okay. 913 01:02:13,410 --> 01:02:24,925 Maybe I am losing my mind. Where is my mind? Where is my mind? 914 01:02:24,925 --> 01:02:36,640 Where is my mind? Maybe she knew, and that's why she left. 915 01:02:38,160 --> 01:02:39,680 Not because of the war. 916 01:02:40,080 --> 01:02:40,720 Luisa: War? 917 01:02:40,880 --> 01:02:45,935 Sherry: Because she knew that she couldn't do it. Even after 918 01:02:45,935 --> 01:02:50,495 everything he gave up to stay here and be with her, she just 919 01:02:51,055 --> 01:03:01,200 left him and left me. Maybe because she knew that he was 920 01:03:01,200 --> 01:03:09,040 broken, that both of us were broken, broken beyond repair. 921 01:03:11,985 --> 01:03:20,145 I get it. Watching him suffer day after day was absolute 922 01:03:20,145 --> 01:03:26,240 torture. I know he didn't want me to see him like that. I 923 01:03:26,240 --> 01:03:30,960 wouldn't want Luisa to see me like that, but I wouldn't let 924 01:03:30,960 --> 01:03:32,880 her. Nope. 925 01:03:33,840 --> 01:03:36,640 I'll be dead before I ever let that happen to Babalu. 926 01:03:56,790 --> 01:04:00,390 Narrator: Babalu was created, written, and produced by me, 927 01:04:00,390 --> 01:04:05,345 Kimberly Truong. Directed by Katharine Chen Lerner. Sound 928 01:04:05,345 --> 01:04:09,665 design, editing, and mixing by Charles Moody. With performances 929 01:04:09,665 --> 01:04:16,960 by Christine Liao, Jaxy Boyd, Circus-Szalewski, Lee Chen, Ruby 930 01:04:16,960 --> 01:04:24,080 Marez, Greg Smith, Mark Morante, Melissa Bickerton, Rishi Arya, 931 01:04:24,240 --> 01:04:29,920 Julianne Kolb, Emily Bolt, Jackie Aubel, Stephanie Orlando, 932 01:04:30,160 --> 01:04:35,045 Katharine Chen Lerner, a very good boy named Gus, and 933 01:04:35,045 --> 01:04:38,325 Kimberly Truong. Theme music by Edith Mudge. 934 01:04:38,485 --> 01:04:42,965 Additional music by Manish Ayachit. Studio recording by 935 01:04:42,965 --> 01:04:48,680 Parker Silzer and David Stern. Artwork by Gabi Hawkins. Logo 936 01:04:48,680 --> 01:04:53,400 by Alex Bruno. A very special thank you to Liesl Lafferty and 937 01:04:53,400 --> 01:04:54,920 the Firecracker Department. 938 01:04:55,080 --> 01:04:59,720 Mari Meyer, Peter Byrnes, Victoria LaVilla, Brandon 939 01:04:59,720 --> 01:05:04,415 Beardsley, Hillary and the boys, Katie McCuen, and our incredible 940 01:05:04,415 --> 01:05:09,215 Kickstarter backers. Babalu is a production of Uneasy Tiger. 941 01:05:09,455 --> 01:05:14,335 For more info or to support this series, follow Uneasy Tiger on 942 01:05:14,335 --> 01:05:19,375 Instagram or TikTok or visit uneasytiger.com. If you or 943 01:05:19,375 --> 01:05:22,550 someone you know is struggling with suicidal thoughts, please 944 01:05:22,550 --> 01:05:28,470 dial 988 or visit 988lifeline.org for resources 945 01:05:28,470 --> 01:05:29,270 and support.