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In this episode of Thinking Christian, I sit down with Pieter Valk—founder and director of Equip and a founding brother of an ecumenical monastery in Nashville—to talk about what it really means to follow Jesus as single men and women in the church. Pieter shares how his ministry equips churches and parents to care well for people who experience same-sex attraction or gender incongruence while embracing a historic Christian sexual ethic.
We explore the biblical vision for vocational singleness versus the default of “common singleness,” how marriage and singleness can actually reinforce one another, and why the church often feels ill-equipped to walk with LGBT+ Christians. Pieter also explains mixed-orientation marriage, challenges reductions of marriage to a “sexual outlet,” and helps reframe both marriage and singleness as vocations ordered toward spiritual fruitfulness.
We close by reflecting on the political battles around sexuality and gender, how those debates have often distorted Christian witness, and what it might look like for the church to lead with discipleship, clarity, and hope instead of just echoing partisan talking points. If you’re a pastor, parent, or disciple trying to think more faithfully about sexuality, singleness, and manhood, this conversation will give you categories, language, and practical direction to move forward.
Find out more about Pieter and his ministry at https://www.pieterlvalk.com.
Go deeper: Unmanly
Thinking Christian is hosted by Dr. James Spencer, president of the D. L. Moody Center and author of Digital Discernment (InterVarsity Press). Each conversation reads the Bible as the final authority for life and faith, questioning the assumptions of our culture, even our Christian culture, so that we don't settle for a narrower vision than God's word offers.
Unsettling convention. Cultivating conviction.
Episodes, articles, and questions: thinkingchristian.org
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