رونوشت کامل #32: Overthinking Everything — Why Your Brain Won’t Shut Up (And How to Deal)

perfect manner. 00:03:51.513 --> 00:03:55.263 So like when I have a task at hand, that's why I say like, I'm not a perfectionist. 00:03:55.263 --> 00:03:55.802 I wouldn't think. 00:03:56.598 --> 00:03:57.768 Stress out about something. 00:03:57.768 --> 00:04:02.298 If I do a job well done, do I overanalyze it and say, but it could have been better. 00:04:02.747 --> 00:04:03.918 I don't, yeah, I 00:04:03.918 --> 00:04:04.457 don't either. 00:04:04.608 --> 00:04:10.247 I have a, a former family member who would cook something and everyone would be like, this is amazing. 00:04:10.457 --> 00:04:11.657 No, I really should have done this. 00:04:11.657 --> 00:04:12.168 And we're like, Ugh. 00:04:13.127 --> 00:04:14.298 That's exhausting. 00:04:14.298 --> 00:04:14.538 It is 00:04:14.538 --> 00:04:15.318 exhausting. 00:04:15.677 --> 00:04:25.817 I, the, my problem is, uh, I think they call it oppositional defiance disorder, which then my husband is like, there's a name for everything. 00:04:26.973 --> 00:04:38.132 It means that I thrive on a list and structure, but then even if I made that own list, my own brain goes into my own brain and goes, fuck, you don't tell me what to do. 00:04:39.483 --> 00:04:41.432 I mean, that's very different. 00:04:41.733 --> 00:04:45.783 So, so then you'll appreciate some of the root causes of overthinking. 00:04:46.202 --> 00:04:50.552 You know me when I have to, and I, I'm not citing sources this time because it's just knowledge. 00:04:51.108 --> 00:04:52.187 It is a mix. 00:04:52.458 --> 00:04:53.507 These are just a few of 'em. 00:04:53.538 --> 00:05:00.197 Some root causes are a mix of psychological factors, past experiences, especially trauma. 00:05:00.257 --> 00:05:00.528 Yeah. 00:05:00.557 --> 00:05:00.827 Okay. 00:05:00.827 --> 00:05:01.637 Which, yes. 00:05:01.937 --> 00:05:03.228 And situational stress. 00:05:03.468 --> 00:05:03.617 Sure. 00:05:03.617 --> 00:05:04.968 So those were three that I selected. 00:05:04.997 --> 00:05:06.197 'cause I was like, we late. 00:05:06.288 --> 00:05:06.497 Yeah. 00:05:06.497 --> 00:05:06.978 Like we can, 00:05:07.007 --> 00:05:07.307 yeah, 00:05:07.338 --> 00:05:08.148 we can go with that. 00:05:08.987 --> 00:05:11.028 Um, some, okay. 00:05:11.028 --> 00:05:11.298 Wait. 00:05:11.298 --> 00:05:16.668 Some ways to manage, let's talk about ways to manage from a professional. 00:05:16.668 --> 00:05:19.307 And if I got any information, it was from all of the health sites. 00:05:20.028 --> 00:05:22.817 And then I also have my best friend who is, 00:05:23.418 --> 00:05:23.898 I'm sorry. 00:05:23.927 --> 00:05:24.528 I'm just a mess 00:05:24.528 --> 00:05:24.677 right now. 00:05:24.677 --> 00:05:25.398 Megan's tired today. 00:05:25.427 --> 00:05:26.298 I'm not that tired. 00:05:26.298 --> 00:05:27.978 I just can't catch a good breath. 00:05:28.067 --> 00:05:28.728 So when that is the worst. 00:05:28.817 --> 00:05:29.028 Yeah. 00:05:29.867 --> 00:05:31.067 When you can't catch a good breath. 00:05:31.067 --> 00:05:33.168 And then I overthink why I can't catch a good breath. 00:05:33.173 --> 00:05:33.233 Yeah. 00:05:33.237 --> 00:05:35.447 And then I think something to do with my heart. 00:05:35.447 --> 00:05:37.127 Do I need to make an appointment with a cardiologist? 00:05:37.127 --> 00:05:38.343 Do we need to add it to the list? 00:05:38.343 --> 00:05:38.478 Yeah. 00:05:38.478 --> 00:05:38.838 There's a, 00:05:39.108 --> 00:05:41.208 so if I yawn, I'm not tired and I'm not bored. 00:05:41.208 --> 00:05:41.598 I'm just, 00:05:41.622 --> 00:05:47.567 it's a whole, it's just a, a downward spiral of this weird tornado. 00:05:48.197 --> 00:05:53.987 So some ways to manage stress that he shared with me that I thought were really cool, were recognition like. 00:05:54.137 --> 00:05:54.257 Mm-hmm. 00:05:54.677 --> 00:05:59.898 So it's kind of, you go through the steps of admitting right, or whatever. 00:06:00.317 --> 00:06:08.177 So recognition, and that's tied in with like self-reflection to shift your perspective on the matter, as in. 00:06:08.627 --> 00:06:13.728 I mean everything dependent on the certain situation, but put yourself in the shoes of someone else. 00:06:13.728 --> 00:06:15.408 The bystander looking in. 00:06:15.408 --> 00:06:15.497 Mm-hmm. 00:06:15.767 --> 00:06:16.098 Right. 00:06:16.127 --> 00:06:16.427 Yeah. 00:06:16.608 --> 00:06:24.437 And try to refute any kind of counterpoint or just like argument that you could, that could be made hypothetically. 00:06:25.067 --> 00:06:25.158 Sure. 00:06:25.158 --> 00:06:34.757 And then the third was to temper the concept and attach something to help the transition in finding the solution. 00:06:34.757 --> 00:06:37.187 So be solutions oriented, be positive about it. 00:06:37.862 --> 00:06:45.903 Because I think the problem with overthinking is when we get stuck in our own mind, at least for me, it is very easy to just keep going down. 00:06:45.992 --> 00:06:46.202 Yeah. 00:06:46.382 --> 00:06:50.072 And then almost being consumed in a way by it. 00:06:50.882 --> 00:06:51.362 So it's, 00:06:51.362 --> 00:06:51.632 yeah, 00:06:52.052 --> 00:06:52.892 it's a little challenging. 00:06:52.892 --> 00:06:54.543 I tend to try to find the positive. 00:06:54.543 --> 00:06:55.052 That's me. 00:06:55.502 --> 00:06:56.793 Oh, we've talked about that before. 00:06:56.793 --> 00:06:57.012 Me too. 00:06:57.723 --> 00:06:58.502 We try. 00:06:58.502 --> 00:07:00.122 I'm a big silver lining person. 00:07:00.213 --> 00:07:00.723 Yes. 00:07:00.723 --> 00:07:04.142 Even if it's like a very farfetched silver lining, it's still there. 00:07:04.142 --> 00:07:04.413 Oh yeah. 00:07:04.413 --> 00:07:04.502 It's 00:07:04.502 --> 00:07:05.973 as J as it is, 00:07:06.062 --> 00:07:10.622 I have clung for dear life to some very tenuous silver linings. 00:07:11.223 --> 00:07:12.242 But whatever gets you through, 00:07:12.663 --> 00:07:20.523 and I think a lot of people just go through this where they think

of that one thing and just can't stop thinking about it. 00:07:20.702 --> 00:07:24.362 Now, I will tell you that there are some advantages to being an overthinker. 00:07:25.127 --> 00:07:33.317 That is exactly that, that you will analyze issues from multiple angles considering various outcomes and possibilities. 00:07:33.858 --> 00:07:35.778 Yeah, that's what we just said. 00:07:35.958 --> 00:07:40.127 If you can get past the like analysis paralysis, then hell yeah. 00:07:40.218 --> 00:07:41.418 Then you're unstoppable 00:07:42.137 --> 00:07:47.658 because you've thought so many things through which actually means the good, bad, and the ugly. 00:07:47.687 --> 00:07:47.807 Yeah. 00:07:47.807 --> 00:07:50.538 You've calculated out risk. 00:07:50.567 --> 00:07:52.877 This is like risk assessment type situation. 00:07:52.908 --> 00:07:52.997 Yep. 00:07:53.447 --> 00:07:53.538 But. 00:07:54.182 --> 00:08:00.723 Also just, I think it helps me on preparing myself for maybe something I wasn't expecting. 00:08:01.293 --> 00:08:01.802 Oh, yeah. 00:08:02.163 --> 00:08:03.632 So if it's like a bad thing. 00:08:03.663 --> 00:08:03.752 Mm-hmm. 00:08:04.293 --> 00:08:11.163 I just wanna prepare myself a little bit for it, and I wanna know that at least I've already thought through that this was a possibility. 00:08:11.762 --> 00:08:16.353 There are some things that happened to me in my life that never could I have even thought of or imagined. 00:08:16.382 --> 00:08:16.713 Yeah. 00:08:16.742 --> 00:08:18.812 That then will set me on a Okay. 00:08:19.382 --> 00:08:22.952 But I have been very good in trying to implement. 00:08:23.642 --> 00:08:35.972 Let it go if it's not, you know, there's, there's the whole thing of, we talk about control a lot and I love being in control of certain aspects of my life that I can control, but I'm not in control. 00:08:36.033 --> 00:08:44.913 Big picture, I'm not in control'cause God is in control, but also on the medium or the median or average picture, I'm not in control of a lot of other stuff. 00:08:44.942 --> 00:08:47.283 I can control literally the actions I take. 00:08:47.283 --> 00:08:47.373 Mm-hmm. 00:08:47.852 --> 00:08:49.982 The words I take, what I put in my body. 00:08:50.357 --> 00:08:58.067 How I react, like how I let my emotions react to something, my emotions, and that's the only control that's there. 00:08:58.847 --> 00:09:01.607 So you kind of have to give that up in a way. 00:09:01.668 --> 00:09:09.408 But I think I used to see it as more of a negative thing that I was overthinking, and I've really tried to train myself not to spiral. 00:09:10.097 --> 00:09:10.488 Yeah. 00:09:10.878 --> 00:09:11.717 And sometimes it's hard. 00:09:11.807 --> 00:09:12.317 It is hard. 00:09:12.317 --> 00:09:13.337 It's like a conscious effort. 00:09:13.337 --> 00:09:19.097 It's like a, you'll never, once you're an overthinker, you'll never not. 00:09:19.893 --> 00:09:26.462 Overthink it, but you can, you have to consciously work

at it all the time to keep it healthy. 00:09:27.932 --> 00:09:28.113 Yeah. 00:09:28.113 --> 00:09:30.302 I don't think it'll ever be that second nature thing. 00:09:30.332 --> 00:09:30.393 Yeah. 00:09:30.393 --> 00:09:34.173 Where it'll just, oh, I would've, I would've thought too much about that. 00:09:34.562 --> 00:09:38.763 I just think I don't like the spiral that it can potentially take me to. 00:09:38.763 --> 00:09:47.793 So with all of those advantages of, yeah, I can analyze everything from so many different angles and kind of think already, or not predict, but. 00:09:48.182 --> 00:09:51.482 Sometimes pattern recognition goes along with that. 00:09:52.143 --> 00:09:59.192 So there's a lot of good that I see to it, but then there's also, okay, but if it takes this one, let's say it goes the bad route. 00:09:59.283 --> 00:10:02.552 What are the, what are the rabbit hole stems from the bad route? 00:10:02.552 --> 00:10:08.582 Because technically, I guess overthinking is just, you're putting yourself in the web, the rabbit hole of your own mind. 00:10:08.582 --> 00:10:08.643 Yeah. 00:10:08.643 --> 00:10:13.173 Because once you do start going down that you'll create shit that wasn't even supposed to be there. 00:10:13.623 --> 00:10:14.072 Oh yeah. 00:10:14.072 --> 00:10:15.753 The things, the scenarios, excuse 00:10:15.753 --> 00:10:15.873 me. 00:10:16.248 --> 00:10:22.097 The scenarios I've created in my brain are movie worthy. 00:10:22.908 --> 00:10:25.937 Like that would never happen. 00:10:26.597 --> 00:10:27.168 Do you know what? 00:10:27.168 --> 00:10:28.097 So I never do this. 00:10:28.097 --> 00:10:35.177 I don't know if you do it, but I know people who do, they'll be telling you how to have conversations with people. 00:10:35.177 --> 00:10:45.258 They know that you have to go meet with someone or have a conversation, and they'll basically talk out the whole conversation like, yeah, and then you go, and then he'll go, or she'll go and you go, and I'm like, wait, wait. 00:10:45.738 --> 00:10:46.368 I'm so sorry. 00:10:46.638 --> 00:10:48.587 I'm not in that conversation right now. 00:10:48.648 --> 00:10:55.577 I can't take a hypothetical script of how this and what to say, but some people really like that. 00:10:55.577 --> 00:10:56.628 They really get into it. 00:10:56.687 --> 00:11:12.677 The hard part of that for me is that if I've built up this script in my mind and you are not following that script, my brain will go haywire and now I am out of the conversation and I have no idea how to, especially if it's like a confrontational conversation. 00:11:13.322 --> 00:11:14.763 Because I definitely do that. 00:11:14.763 --> 00:11:26.673 If I have to have a potentially high stakes or tense conversation with somebody, if I'm reacting right in the moment, I mean I can, I can carry that. 00:11:26.673 --> 00:11:36.363 But if I know that I have to go to somebody and say, Hey, this was wrong, or whatever the conversation is, and I rehearsed it in

my head. 00:11:36.363 --> 00:11:40.682 'cause that's, I will just do that by default setting. 00:11:41.538 --> 00:11:47.118 Then if that person is, or they'll throw a wrench in it and then all of a sudden I am on my heels, like, what? 00:11:47.927 --> 00:11:50.087 And now I have lost the entire thing. 00:11:50.988 --> 00:11:59.238 And so I have to really consciously try to not do that or what I will do, especially if it's somebody I know really well. 00:12:00.227 --> 00:12:02.148 I will play out a conversation. 00:12:02.207 --> 00:12:03.317 Okay, but what if they say this? 00:12:03.378 --> 00:12:05.418 Okay, now what if they say this and then what? 00:12:05.418 --> 00:12:10.337 And I have gone through 30 different of the same version of this conversation. 00:12:10.427 --> 00:12:11.628 That's not healthy. 00:12:12.168 --> 00:12:18.768 I will tell you right now, I am trying so hard 'cause that just sucks all of my energy. 00:12:19.518 --> 00:12:26.388 But there's a part of my little fight or flight brain that is like, no, you have to be prepared for every possible outcome. 00:12:26.898 --> 00:12:27.738 Well, hold on. 00:12:27.768 --> 00:12:28.878 'cause I think that that's good. 00:12:28.878 --> 00:12:35.148 So I think that playing out the conversation in your own mind is good, but it would be like you telling one of your kids. 00:12:36.258 --> 00:12:37.248 This is how it's gonna go. 00:12:37.607 --> 00:12:39.557 You're gonna go like this, they're gonna go like this. 00:12:39.557 --> 00:12:42.738 You're gonna, you're dictating it out, scripting it out for them. 00:12:43.008 --> 00:12:44.717 I can't tell that to another person. 00:12:44.717 --> 00:12:52.577 Like I can't tell you about the conversation that you're gonna have, that you already have to play out in your head, because of course you go in knowing what you're gonna say. 00:12:52.668 --> 00:12:58.038 You know that there's gonna be one of, however, typically like three responses for you. 00:12:58.187 --> 00:12:58.548 30. 00:12:58.937 --> 00:13:03.347 But I'm just saying there's always gonna be a. Yeah, agree. 00:13:03.347 --> 00:13:09.317 I see the picture, what you're, you're wild for even saying that you're crazy or three, the wild card. 00:13:09.467 --> 00:13:11.177 But then what if they had a terrible day? 00:13:11.628 --> 00:13:12.528 What if you just, 00:13:12.528 --> 00:13:13.668 what if they're constipated? 00:13:13.697 --> 00:13:23.508 I used to have a coworker who, anytime somebody was rude to us, she'd be like, and I'd be back, you know, in the break room like this motherfucker, and she'd be like, Megan, what if he's constipated today? 00:13:23.508 --> 00:13:23.597 What? 00:13:23.957 --> 00:13:25.008 And I was like, Colleen, 00:13:25.878 --> 00:13:26.477 he's not a baby. 00:13:26.477 --> 00:13:27.582 I don't want to be. 00:13:28.653 --> 00:13:32.163 I just please be mean to me or with me for just a minute. 00:13:32.373 --> 00:13:33.753 Like, stop being so reasonable. 00:13:33.753

--> 00:13:34.232 But hold on. 00:13:34.232 --> 00:13:38.013 What if he's constipated is such a, you think a baby, right? 00:13:38.043 --> 00:13:39.033 Oh, the baby's grumpy. 00:13:39.033 --> 00:13:40.202 'cause the baby has to burp. 00:13:40.202 --> 00:13:41.013 The baby's grumpy. 00:13:41.013 --> 00:13:42.932 'cause the baby this, whatever it may be. 00:13:42.932 --> 00:13:43.293 That was her 00:13:43.383 --> 00:13:43.788 go-to for 00:13:43.788 --> 00:13:44.067 everything. 00:13:44.067 --> 00:13:44.192 That was the 00:13:44.673 --> 00:13:45.452 hysterical 00:13:45.543 --> 00:13:47.523 you would, I would never think to put that on an adult. 00:13:47.673 --> 00:13:48.003 Yeah. 00:13:48.243 --> 00:13:48.482 Oh. 00:13:49.202 --> 00:13:49.682 Oh. 00:13:49.712 --> 00:13:50.222 Hello? 00:13:50.883 --> 00:13:52.802 Uh, I will give you a fun fact. 00:13:53.312 --> 00:13:53.702 Okay. 00:13:53.972 --> 00:13:54.092 Okay. 00:13:54.092 --> 00:13:54.903 Fun facts are fun. 00:13:55.832 --> 00:14:05.102 Overthinkers tend to often be deeply loyal and committed and have attentiveness to the smallest details. 00:14:05.133 --> 00:14:13.653 That's because we have already played out every freaking scenario and we've decided to maintain that relationship. 00:14:14.222 --> 00:14:20.013 We're rolling the dice on this one, and, uh, and sometimes that doesn't, you know, this is just human nature. 00:14:20.013 --> 00:14:22.263 Sometimes that doesn't always, uh, go, but. 00:14:22.847 --> 00:14:25.278 I like trying to pay attention to small details. 00:14:25.278 --> 00:14:30.918 My mom, sometimes when she's here, she'll get mad at me if she's talking to me and I'm on the computer doing something. 00:14:30.977 --> 00:14:31.097 Mm-hmm. 00:14:31.548 --> 00:14:34.577 And she'll be like, can you just focus and like, pay attention to me? 00:14:34.577 --> 00:14:37.337 And I'm, and I tell her, no, I, I know what you said. 00:14:37.847 --> 00:14:40.998 I can do two things at once, but some people just need that. 00:14:40.998 --> 00:14:42.077 And, and I, I get it. 00:14:42.077 --> 00:14:42.857 It's totally, 00:14:42.918 --> 00:14:43.967 I do that to my kids too. 00:14:43.998 --> 00:14:44.327 It's a, 00:14:44.327 --> 00:14:45.528 would you turn around and look at my face, 00:14:45.528 --> 00:14:45.707 please. 00:14:45.707 --> 00:14:50.373 Yeah, it's, and I, I can, I can repeat exactly what she said and I know how she meant it, and I know the whole thing. 00:14:51.273 --> 00:15:03.692 But I also think that there is a point of, we have just become so consumed in general with everything on that list or on our task list that needs to get done because we're just slaves to the man. 00:15:04.052 --> 00:15:07.572 Um, and that's not one man, that's the government man group. 00:15:07.592 --> 00:15:09.243 The man, the, the man. 00:15:09.722 --> 00:15:09.962 The 00:15:09.962 --> 00:15:10.773 man there. 00:15:10.773 --> 00:15:11.192 That's it. 00:15:11.582 --> 00:15:12.663 Whoever it may be. 00:15:12.663 --> 00:15:12.722 Yeah. 00:15:12.753 --> 00:15:14.613 Or whatever group might be running it. 00:15:15.153 --> 00:15:18.722 So we're just, we've, you know, we've all been kind of trained and fixated in that. 00:15:18.722 --> 00:15:20.102 So I understand where. 00:15:20.868 --> 00:15:22.038 I need to just focus. 00:15:22.038 --> 00:15:26.898 That'll actually help me a lot to be able to just put it aside and do it. 00:15:27.197 --> 00:15:41.508 But then I think there's also, like, for me right now holding this, there's, okay, I did it, I'll put it down in a second, but I, uh, it's like a, not a comfort, but it's just that habit, that habit of, well, I always am doing something. 00:15:41.508 --> 00:15:42.557 So now it's become. 00:15:43.187 --> 00:15:44.508 If I don't do it, then it won't get done. 00:15:44.508 --> 00:15:48.077 And if it doesn't get done, then this and this, but I can also listen to you and I can do this. 00:15:48.437 --> 00:15:50.057 It's just a weird, this is a, 00:15:50.057 --> 00:15:50.477 yeah, 00:15:50.567 --> 00:15:56.177 we're connected and, or, um, not obsessed, but we're just not used to not having devices. 00:15:56.177 --> 00:15:57.317 And I just miss the nineties. 00:15:58.488 --> 00:15:58.908 That's it. 00:15:59.238 --> 00:16:00.378 I think it all comes down to that. 00:16:00.378 --> 00:16:07.067 Like I just don't wanna have that to, you know, even, even just the internet, even just standard work, standard emails. 00:16:07.128 --> 00:16:08.717 Okay, now, oh, great. 00:16:08.717 --> 00:16:12.378 Now if I respond to this one though, I have to respond to all of them, and it just becomes that. 00:16:13.548 --> 00:16:15.288 It's a, it's like never ending. 00:16:15.288 --> 00:16:21.347 I think when you are an overthinker, when you go through this and just trying to, I guess this is just managing life in general. 00:16:21.347 --> 00:16:21.437 Mm-hmm. 00:16:22.187 --> 00:16:26.057 It's hard sometimes to just put it down and take a step back. 00:16:26.057 --> 00:16:26.118 Yeah. 00:16:27.138 --> 00:16:35.268 Well that's why like I have kind of built up the expectation at my actual job, not really my freelance job. 00:16:35.273 --> 00:16:38.957 I'm a lot more responsive in that because freelance depends on that. 00:16:38.957 --> 00:16:41.057 But in my actual office job. 00:16:41.613 --> 00:16:44.913 I don't reply to emails right away. 00:16:45.393 --> 00:16:55.263 Typically, I like to let 'em sit for about a day because a no part of my job is an emergency. 00:16:55.383 --> 00:16:55.623 That's right. 00:16:55.623 --> 00:17:02.822 And the amount of times I've told people that, like having come from emergency vet med, I, I know what an emergency is. 00:17:03.033 --> 00:17:07.742 No part of marketing is an emergency in my particular. 00:17:08.748 --> 00:17:09.708 It is just not. 00:17:10.428 --> 00:17:14.718 And so I don't owe anybody a 30 second response. 00:17:15.377 --> 00:17:16.728 Let me think on it for a day.

00:17:16.758 --> 00:17:17.208 Let me go. 00:17:17.238 --> 00:17:23.928 I will get back to you most of the time, but take a, take a breather. 00:17:24.288 --> 00:17:26.268 We all came from the 19 hundreds. 00:17:26.597 --> 00:17:30.917 There's very few people that I deal with in my job currently that are not, 00:17:30.948 --> 00:17:31.637 are two thousands 00:17:31.637 --> 00:17:32.718 from the 19 hundreds. 00:17:32.718 --> 00:17:35.087 And so like, let's all take a step back. 00:17:35.327 --> 00:17:36.222 You can wait 24 hours. 00:17:37.097 --> 00:17:40.008 For me to respond to you and it'll be okay. 00:17:40.488 --> 00:17:41.867 The world will keep turning. 00:17:43.428 --> 00:17:44.117 It'll be okay. 00:17:44.238 --> 00:17:45.708 I wish I had that in my job. 00:17:45.708 --> 00:17:46.458 Yeah, you, yeah. 00:17:46.458 --> 00:17:46.637 I 00:17:46.637 --> 00:17:46.788 can 00:17:46.788 --> 00:17:47.387 see how you wouldn't, 00:17:47.387 --> 00:17:51.498 you know, when I do have that, and I've, and I'm always very polite about it. 00:17:51.498 --> 00:18:00.978 If I have someone email me, like, past client, future client, whatever it is, if someone emails me and it's not pertinent to like, Hey, I saw this article and I thought you'd enjoy it. 00:18:01.337 --> 00:18:02.028 'cause that's happened to me. 00:18:02.028 --> 00:18:03.377 I've got one person that does that. 00:18:03.377 --> 00:18:06.407 And sometimes two days will go by and. 00:18:06.768 --> 00:18:13.278 It's just, it's not that I didn't find it important, it's that number one, oops, I opened it and I didn't have the time to actually read this. 00:18:13.278 --> 00:18:13.698 Are you respond 00:18:13.698 --> 00:18:14.238 in your head 00:18:14.238 --> 00:18:16.367 beneficial email or I'll deal with it later. 00:18:16.847 --> 00:18:26.718 But you know, we've talked about how much we love the schedule send because I, when I figured that out, that was a game changer for me because a lot of these times when I'm finally having the time 00:18:26.748 --> 00:18:26.837 mm-hmm. 00:18:27.347 --> 00:18:28.038 It's midnight. 00:18:28.038 --> 00:18:28.097 Yeah. 00:18:28.188 --> 00:18:31.367 I'm not gonna go reply to someone at midnight, number one. 00:18:31.698 --> 00:18:33.678 Maybe they'll get it in the morning, but number two. 00:18:34.008 --> 00:18:39.978 I don't want people to see it at midnight and know that, oh, if I ever have a question Uhhuh, I can reach out at midnight and she'll respond. 00:18:39.978 --> 00:18:41.178 That's, yeah. 00:18:41.327 --> 00:18:43.847 I'm trying to, and that was a, a more recent 00:18:43.968 --> 00:18:44.268 mm-hmm. 00:18:44.508 --> 00:18:47.087 Revelation to me in my own brain. 00:18:47.147 --> 00:18:48.557 Don't send it in the middle of the night. 00:18:48.557 --> 00:18:54.317 Even though maybe you have insomnia and can't sleep, even though they'll see it at 7:00 AM they're gonna see that timestamp. 00:18:54.528 --> 00:18:54.917 Yeah. 00:18:55.008 --> 00:18:58.577 And they're gonna think, well, she'll just respond to me then. 00:18:59.208 --> 00:19:02.837 Yeah, I get a solid amount of work done between 00:19:02.837 --> 00:19:17.178 00 AM and it's a rare person who gets a reply from me right back at that moment like you do because I know that, you know, we can text each other whenever. 00:19:17.208 --> 00:19:17.417 Yeah. 00:19:17.778 --> 00:19:19.067 But, um. 00:19:21.242 --> 00:19:31.742 One of the only people, like right now I'm in the midst of building a new website and the gal that I'm working with is on the East coast, so I don't mind emailing her at six in the morning because fine, that's no big deal. 00:19:31.742 --> 00:19:39.903 But generally speaking, if somebody I'm working with local, yeah, they're getting a scheduled send 'cause Well, and then you're talking about focus. 00:19:39.903 --> 00:19:46.413 So a, that's part of why I like to crochet so much because it does keep my hands and my brain busy, but I'm not on my phone. 00:19:48.722 --> 00:19:59.853 Then I have a friend who has a unique ability to just kill my focus for the entire day. 00:20:00.093 --> 00:20:08.853 I can be in a flow at work, just killing it, and then I'll get a notification of a reel or something and I'm, I'm gone now. 00:20:09.242 --> 00:20:10.383 I may as well go home. 00:20:11.268 --> 00:20:17.117 And I was in one of one of those conversations one day and a coworker came and brought a little rock. 00:20:17.238 --> 00:20:23.958 It's like smaller than a golf ball and on a little polished rock and engraved on it is the word focus. 00:20:23.958 --> 00:20:29.867 And she put it on my desk during the middle of one of these focus killer conversations. 00:20:29.897 --> 00:20:29.938 Oh no. 00:20:29.938 --> 00:20:29.982 Oh no. 00:20:30.468 --> 00:20:32.057 And so I look at that. 00:20:32.057 --> 00:20:34.938 Every time I look at that, I just crack up laughing. 00:20:34.938 --> 00:20:36.077 'cause I'm like, oh yeah, you're right. 00:20:36.167 --> 00:20:36.738 Focus. 00:20:36.768 --> 00:20:37.067 Yeah. 00:20:37.847 --> 00:20:38.357 Focus. 00:20:38.357 --> 00:20:38.508 Focus. 00:20:38.657 --> 00:20:39.137 Um. 00:20:39.573 --> 00:20:40.742 I forgot to share. 00:20:40.742 --> 00:20:42.093 I rewrote these notes. 00:20:42.093 --> 00:20:44.163 I had it on a smaller notebook and then I rewrote them. 00:20:44.192 --> 00:20:47.192 'cause number one, writing helps me learn and retain. 00:20:47.583 --> 00:20:58.143 But it was, if you find yourself in a spell, like a real deep web, or I guess a, a wide web, maybe practice, it's like the 3, 3, 3 rule. 00:20:59.167 --> 00:21:03.182 It's identify three different things in a room that you're in. 00:21:03.393 --> 00:21:03.423 Okay? 00:21:03.423 --> 00:21:05.583 Like stop, identify three different things. 00:21:05.853 --> 00:21:07.532 Listen for three different sounds. 00:21:08.087 --> 00:21:10.097 And move three body parts. 00:21:10.637 --> 00:21:11.478 Oh, interesting. 00:21:11.837 --> 00:21:16.258 And

it kind of, and you always say the motion stuff, Uhhuh how, like the benefit of that. 00:21:16.258 --> 00:21:16.442 But 00:21:16.442 --> 00:21:18.317 it needs to be like a bilateral motion. 00:21:18.347 --> 00:21:18.557 Yeah. 00:21:18.557 --> 00:21:20.657 To get your whole brain in involved. 00:21:20.657 --> 00:21:30.077 So I sometimes I think if, sometimes I'll sit still, sometimes I don't, we know I use my hands all the time to talk. 00:21:30.077 --> 00:21:32.458 I feel like I can't sit still The way that you use your hands. 00:21:33.317 --> 00:21:36.407 You're moving your hands all the time and I'm just moving everything all the time. 00:21:36.438 --> 00:21:37.998 Like I cannot sit still. 00:21:38.327 --> 00:21:39.833 I It is, it is pretty. 00:21:40.907 --> 00:21:48.587 Nuts when I'm, when I'm talking I, and so then, then I'll cla bum or I'll sit on them to try to not be such a mime about it. 00:21:48.798 --> 00:21:49.127 Okay. 00:21:49.127 --> 00:21:55.278 But I thought that that was like an Italian stereotype until we went to that Italian dinner. 00:21:55.548 --> 00:21:57.678 And you brought that cute little Italian couple. 00:21:57.678 --> 00:21:57.798 Oh yeah. 00:21:57.798 --> 00:21:58.518 Older couple. 00:21:58.518 --> 00:22:04.758 And then they were talking with the other Italian man and these two Italian men, like speaking in Italian. 00:22:05.268 --> 00:22:09.198 Just the hand movements were incredible. 00:22:09.557 --> 00:22:10.008 It was. 00:22:11.103 --> 00:22:11.643 I loved it. 00:22:11.673 --> 00:22:14.133 It made my whole day because I was like, this is real. 00:22:14.222 --> 00:22:15.542 It's, it is real. 00:22:15.542 --> 00:22:16.623 It's definitely real. 00:22:16.623 --> 00:22:17.702 It's just everything. 00:22:17.702 --> 00:22:19.413 And they're much more exaggerated. 00:22:19.413 --> 00:22:24.303 Obviously when you're with or when you're in Italy or when you're with people like that, like they 00:22:24.303 --> 00:22:27.333 had just met each other and they're slapping each other on the back. 00:22:27.333 --> 00:22:28.472 You son of a bitch. 00:22:28.532 --> 00:22:29.883 I mean, it was incredible. 00:22:29.913 --> 00:22:30.962 It's so good. 00:22:30.962 --> 00:22:34.442 I love it, but it also reminds me of. 00:22:34.623 --> 00:22:37.022 Because it's just a whole other language. 00:22:37.022 --> 00:22:41.823 The hands, there's motions for certain things that, you know, everybody knows over there. 00:22:41.823 --> 00:22:43.952 So there's just, it's a lot. 00:22:43.982 --> 00:22:44.702 It's complex. 00:22:44.732 --> 00:22:49.053 But I will say there's the guy on the internet who does HO math. 00:22:50.133 --> 00:22:54.123 The handle is, I think it's ho math, and I've sent you charts of his before. 00:22:54.333 --> 00:22:58.923 He'll be like, women that are doing this and like crying about this and he'll break it down. 00:22:58.923 --> 00:22:59.702 It's called HO Math. 00:22:59.762 --> 00:23:00.873 Okay, at HO Math. 00:23:01.563 --> 00:23:03.093 This is for you in a loving way. 00:23:03.587 --> 00:23:06.678 He was saying that, so I do, I do this a lot, right? 00:23:06.678 --> 00:23:06.738 Yeah. 00:23:06.738 --> 00:23:09.258 Like with the hands, like this, like an Italian. 00:23:09.258 --> 00:23:12.738 And he was, he had this whole video about women who do this. 00:23:12.917 --> 00:23:13.607 Oh, the bird. 00:23:13.613 --> 00:23:15.258 The bird, yeah, the bird hand. 00:23:15.258 --> 00:23:15.948 And it's like Bach. 00:23:15.948 --> 00:23:16.428 Bach. 00:23:16.817 --> 00:23:17.387 So. 00:23:17.762 --> 00:23:19.923 Now when I do it, I get super self-conscious. 00:23:19.923 --> 00:23:21.452 'cause I'm gonna, I'm like, oh my gosh. 00:23:21.452 --> 00:23:27.153 What's gonna happen is someone's gonna clip that portion of one of the videos and be like, look at this girl. 00:23:27.153 --> 00:23:29.012 She's totally doing, she's telling us what to do. 00:23:29.042 --> 00:23:29.823 No, I'm not. 00:23:29.823 --> 00:23:30.813 I'm just Italian. 00:23:30.813 --> 00:23:31.428 I talk with my hands. 00:23:31.428 --> 00:23:31.708 Sorry. 00:23:31.708 --> 00:23:34.803 The Italian hands are different than the bird hands though. 00:23:35.073 --> 00:23:37.923 I know, but still it's just, it's the motion. 00:23:38.252 --> 00:23:38.462 I get it. 00:23:38.492 --> 00:23:38.643 Okay. 00:23:38.643 --> 00:23:47.343 So back in the day, I worked at this job with a wide, weird variety of people and there was a woman who worked up in the administrative office. 00:23:48.137 --> 00:23:55.127 And my department was kind of the rebellious group. 00:23:55.548 --> 00:23:56.573 We kinda did whatever we wanted. 00:23:56.573 --> 00:23:56.972 Perfect. 00:23:56.972 --> 00:23:58.518 We were not chained to a desk. 00:23:58.548 --> 00:24:03.377 We were not, you know, we did, we could go outside like we were pretty rogue. 00:24:03.377 --> 00:24:05.057 Can I guess what job this was, or do you not wanna 00:24:05.057 --> 00:24:05.117 say? 00:24:05.117 --> 00:24:05.778 Yeah, no, you can guess. 00:24:05.778 --> 00:24:06.978 Was this car dealership stuff? 00:24:07.008 --> 00:24:08.087 No, this was at the hotel. 00:24:08.357 --> 00:24:09.048 Oh. 00:24:09.198 --> 00:24:11.387 I worked at lots of hotels, but this was at the local hotel. 00:24:11.417 --> 00:24:11.748 Oh, 00:24:11.748 --> 00:24:12.258 okay. 00:24:12.258 --> 00:24:12.268 Okay. 00:24:12.268 --> 00:24:12.278 Okay. 00:24:12.278 --> 00:24:16.532 And I know that we have one person who is listening who a hundred percent knows and probably can guess who this is that I'm gonna talk about. 00:24:17.222 --> 00:24:26.403 So this older lady worked up in the administrative office and she was super, like skinny, older lady, very sharp features. 00:24:26.403 --> 00:24:35.432 And when she got mad at us, oh no, she, she would come down and put her hands on her hips and talk to us with her head moving front and back. 00:24:35.583 --> 00:24:36.482 And it, we. 00:24:37.097 -->

00:24:39.498 One of us pointed out that she looked like a chicken. 00:24:40.248 --> 00:24:44.718 And then when we could never take her seriously when she was reprimanding us, it was the freaking funniest. 00:24:44.867 --> 00:24:49.397 So that's all I can think of when you're talking about the chicken hand, because this woman was a whole chicken body. 00:24:49.488 --> 00:24:50.028 The whole chicken, 00:24:50.057 --> 00:24:52.518 and she'd be meaning it with her whole soul. 00:24:52.518 --> 00:24:53.748 She was so mad at us. 00:24:53.807 --> 00:24:54.048 And 00:24:54.048 --> 00:24:55.667 were you all trying not to laugh? 00:24:55.728 --> 00:24:56.807 Oh, I'd have to walk away. 00:24:56.807 --> 00:24:58.877 I'd have to be like, I have to go to the, I have a bloody nose. 00:24:58.877 --> 00:25:02.627 Like I cannot stand here and do this with you because I'm gonna laugh in your face. 00:25:02.657 --> 00:25:04.907 Oh, like that? 00:25:04.938 --> 00:25:04.998 Yeah. 00:25:04.998 --> 00:25:05.357 Okay. 00:25:05.883 --> 00:25:06.573 That's crazy. 00:25:06.663 --> 00:25:06.843 No. 00:25:06.843 --> 00:25:08.133 So I've never seen anyone do that. 00:25:08.133 --> 00:25:09.212 I do wanna see that now though. 00:25:09.212 --> 00:25:10.323 I wanna see that like on a live, that's 00:25:10.682 --> 00:25:11.252 incredible 00:25:11.282 --> 00:25:12.423 human to do that. 00:25:12.423 --> 00:25:18.452 I mean, you know what, if I look hard enough on the internet, I'm pretty sure I could watch something of current and I'll, I'll recreate it for 00:25:18.452 --> 00:25:18.932 you later. 00:25:19.083 --> 00:25:19.442 Okay. 00:25:20.103 --> 00:25:22.353 But the hands thing, I talk all the time. 00:25:22.353 --> 00:25:25.682 So I get the back to the 3, 3, 3 thing. 00:25:26.103 --> 00:25:27.843 I do get that I get. 00:25:28.458 --> 00:25:29.897 You're trying to train. 00:25:29.897 --> 00:25:30.107 Right? 00:25:30.107 --> 00:25:35.508 It's, it's the whole training your brain to be solutions based, to be recognizing everything. 00:25:35.597 --> 00:25:36.587 I get it. 00:25:37.367 --> 00:25:38.298 In theory. 00:25:38.357 --> 00:25:39.167 I totally get it. 00:25:39.198 --> 00:25:40.577 I wanna practice all this stuff. 00:25:41.057 --> 00:25:50.718 I don't want my mind to become Then, you know, you also run the risk of, generally speaking, your mind becoming a prison in more ways than one. 00:25:50.718 --> 00:25:53.897 People already go through stuff in their life where their mind is like a prison to them. 00:25:53.928 --> 00:25:54.167 Yeah. 00:25:54.873 --> 00:25:58.113 When you fixate, it's fixating really, I guess overthinking. 00:25:58.202 --> 00:26:02.103 It's kind of fixating in a weird, in a weird, oh my gosh. 00:26:02.942 --> 00:26:04.113 In a weird way. 00:26:04.202 --> 00:26:05.853 Let's, let's get that out. 00:26:06.722 --> 00:26:07.383 What a day. 00:26:07.923 --> 00:26:09.843 So I get it. 00:26:09.873 --> 00:26:15.633 I'm trying to find solutions for it, but man, I like that feeling of so much. 00:26:16.968 --> 00:26:18.347 We are chaos today. 00:26:19.038 --> 00:26:19.758 I think it's me. 00:26:19.758 --> 00:26:20.478 I'm sorry. 00:26:20.657 --> 00:26:22.307 Its kind of, I'm just biting all the chaos. 00:26:22.337 --> 00:26:22.488 That's okay. 00:26:22.488 --> 00:26:25.127 I's hit this mic stand 15 times. 00:26:25.218 --> 00:26:26.238 Can't sit still. 00:26:26.298 --> 00:26:29.448 I'm like tangents galore. 00:26:29.508 --> 00:26:30.347 Tangents are fine. 00:26:30.347 --> 00:26:31.458 We love the tangents. 00:26:31.458 --> 00:26:31.847 The tangents. 00:26:31.847 --> 00:26:37.367 Myd is high today and I am patched up. 00:26:37.367 --> 00:26:40.428 Like I, I should be focused and I'm not. 00:26:41.147 --> 00:26:41.748 Focus. 00:26:41.748 --> 00:26:42.978 Megan, where's your rock? 00:26:43.728 --> 00:26:44.718 Where's the rock? 00:26:44.778 --> 00:26:46.038 No, I feel like I need it. 00:26:46.097 --> 00:26:47.448 It's in my, it's in my office. 00:26:47.538 --> 00:26:47.688 Okay. 00:26:49.188 --> 00:26:59.057 So, no, I just, I feel like people, you could be in a prison in your own mind for the stupidest thing, and then I think of, I'm very. 00:26:59.807 --> 00:27:03.978 You bring any toxicity into my life, I'm out like, yeah, I don't have the room anymore. 00:27:04.008 --> 00:27:04.188 No. 00:27:04.188 --> 00:27:07.248 In my life for anything like that. 00:27:07.518 --> 00:27:18.587 And I had to learn that the hard way, and we've talked about this, we've talked about it so many times, but when you then, when you're dealing with, you know, not everybody deal with shit. 00:27:18.587 --> 00:27:19.698 The way that we deal with it. 00:27:19.698 --> 00:27:21.768 The way you deal with it is different than the way I deal with it. 00:27:21.768 --> 00:27:23.627 It's just that's human nature. 00:27:23.627 --> 00:27:25.337 It's the way we all kind of function. 00:27:25.998 --> 00:27:38.028 But when I have a situation or I'm a concept that I'm just can't figure out the solution for, or gosh, it's, you know, I have to do this, but what if I, what if this happens? 00:27:38.028 --> 00:27:43.097 Or what if this happens and you now create all those scenarios because you're trying to process the solution? 00:27:43.248 --> 00:27:49.458 I think that the main point is that as someone who tends to overthink about everything a lot. 00:27:50.478 --> 00:27:55.067 I am doing it from an approach of figure out the answer. 00:27:55.188 --> 00:27:55.307 Mm-hmm. 00:27:55.637 --> 00:27:59.867 It's never a web too big where the, where you get stuck in it. 00:27:59.928 --> 00:28:03.857 Like you're stuck in it, but you're trying to find the way out of it. 00:28:03.887 --> 00:28:04.817 Where sit. 00:28:04.817 --> 00:28:06.498 You don't wanna a people who can soak, 00:28:07.553 --> 00:28:10.218 sit, sit and swallow in it. 00:28:11.028 --> 00:28:12.228 Sit in the ick. 00:28:12.228 --> 00:28:12.288 Yeah. 00:28:12.288 --> 00:28:13.698 Who was it that

said that? 00:28:13.938 --> 00:28:15.948 You're just, you're stuck in the yuck. 00:28:16.278 --> 00:28:18.678 Oh, very Dr. Seuss. 00:28:19.853 --> 00:28:20.333 I like it. 00:28:20.452 --> 00:28:21.653 Stuck in the yuck. 00:28:21.742 --> 00:28:22.133 I like it 00:28:22.702 --> 00:28:24.232 because it's like, yeah, that makes sense. 00:28:24.232 --> 00:28:24.712 I get it. 00:28:24.712 --> 00:28:25.012 Mm-hmm. 00:28:25.137 --> 00:28:27.143 So that that sits with me. 00:28:27.143 --> 00:28:28.252 I don't wanna be stuck there. 00:28:28.313 --> 00:28:28.492 No. 00:28:28.492 --> 00:28:29.242 I wanna get out of it. 00:28:29.303 --> 00:28:30.038 I wanna find the next thing. 00:28:30.038 --> 00:28:32.063 It's the same way when I go through like seasonal depression. 00:28:32.063 --> 00:28:32.182 Yeah. 00:28:32.182 --> 00:28:33.383 I don't wanna be there very long. 00:28:33.653 --> 00:28:34.432 I wanna get the fuck out of it. 00:28:34.432 --> 00:28:34.492 Yeah. 00:28:34.542 --> 00:28:38.593 I don't wanna be here, but I'm not gonna force myself to. 00:28:38.998 --> 00:28:40.347 Fake being happy or something. 00:28:40.347 --> 00:28:42.567 I'm gonna process whatever it is I'm going through. 00:28:42.627 --> 00:28:42.958 Yeah. 00:28:43.407 --> 00:28:44.188 Down a rabbit hole. 00:28:44.188 --> 00:28:44.248 Yeah. 00:28:44.367 --> 00:28:45.897 But like I'm gonna process it. 00:28:46.528 --> 00:28:47.607 I'm just gonna do it in my own way. 00:28:47.667 --> 00:28:48.057 Yeah. 00:28:48.988 --> 00:28:56.488 You know, when I overthink, I think the most the, I am one of those people that I wish I could Google my own brain. 00:28:57.117 --> 00:28:58.288 If you're like, what's your favorite movie? 00:28:58.288 --> 00:29:00.807 I'll be like, I don't know what movies exist. 00:29:00.897 --> 00:29:02.278 Like I forget things all the time. 00:29:02.278 --> 00:29:10.407 So what I'm gonna say, it may or may not be true, but when I think one of the times I. 00:29:05.698 --> 00:29:16.887 Overthink the most is I am a person who looks for signs all the time. 00:29:17.548 --> 00:29:20.127 Like if it's something I've been preying on a lot, I'll be like, oh, gimme a sign. 00:29:20.127 --> 00:29:22.107 But you have to give me like a really good sign. 00:29:22.137 --> 00:29:24.357 'cause I am not that bright all the time. 00:29:24.597 --> 00:29:24.688 Okay. 00:29:24.718 --> 00:29:32.127 Gimme something that's like legit concrete that I know without a doubt, but the rest of the time I'm like, was that a sign? 00:29:32.248 --> 00:29:32.907 Was that a sign? 00:29:33.028 --> 00:29:33.657 What color was that? 00:29:33.657 --> 00:29:34.167 Dump truck. 00:29:34.288 --> 00:29:34.917 What is that? 00:29:34.978 --> 00:29:36.387 I've seen three of those today. 00:29:36.478 --> 00:29:37.198 What does that mean? 00:29:37.782 --> 00:29:55.782 I, that's where I will go off onto another planet and it's half of my brain is completely just ruminating on this thing now until I can either figure it out or occasionally I'll get bored of it and I'll just set it down. 00:29:55.903 --> 00:29:57.417 So that's the benefit of the a DD. 00:29:57.432 --> 00:30:02.563 But there's a couple things where I look for signs all. 00:30:02.982 --> 00:30:03.913 The time. 00:30:03.913 --> 00:30:10.692 And I know that if you are looking for a red Toyota Camry, you're gonna see Red Toyota Camrys all the time. 00:30:10.692 --> 00:30:11.923 Like I get that. 00:30:13.212 --> 00:30:20.022 But I have a couple things where I'm just constantly like, or I will have decided, okay, I'm done with that. 00:30:20.113 --> 00:30:21.192 I'm gonna set that down. 00:30:21.972 --> 00:30:25.482 And then God, in his sense of humor goes, no, you're not. 00:30:25.512 --> 00:30:26.712 Here's one of those again. 00:30:27.373 --> 00:30:29.262 And then I'm like, shit, I'm back in it. 00:30:29.893 --> 00:30:31.272 So you're hyper aware. 00:30:31.423 --> 00:30:31.722 Mm-hmm. 00:30:32.637 --> 00:30:36.567 And I mean, we went through that with the situational awareness, episode two, when you talked about all that. 00:30:36.988 --> 00:30:37.917 I'm not aware. 00:30:38.038 --> 00:30:43.528 I'm aware of certain things, hold on situationally if I'm traveling, if I'm doing whatever. 00:30:43.532 --> 00:30:43.617 Sure, sure. 00:30:43.617 --> 00:30:45.597 If it's that kind of situation, I'm aware. 00:30:46.077 --> 00:30:58.587 Behaviors, I'm aware to an extent, and then I'm not like, I don't, there's just certain things because I think my attitude is, it's not my job to figure out behavior. 00:30:59.127 --> 00:30:59.938 Of another person. 00:30:59.998 --> 00:31:03.928 It's my job to figure out my own behavior and how I act when whatever happens. 00:31:03.928 --> 00:31:04.077 Like 00:31:04.077 --> 00:31:04.468 yeah, 00:31:04.708 --> 00:31:07.617 that's just, it's just, it's the interactions with people. 00:31:07.617 --> 00:31:17.097 It's not my job and I don't have the capacity in my own brain to be hyper aware of why someone might be acting the way they're acting. 00:31:17.367 --> 00:31:20.907 And I think it's just because I expect that everyone deals with their own shit. 00:31:20.938 --> 00:31:21.238 Yeah. 00:31:21.238 --> 00:31:22.678 And doesn't project it on others. 00:31:22.708 --> 00:31:22.798 Mm-hmm. 00:31:23.038 --> 00:31:23.127 But 00:31:23.488 --> 00:31:24.327 that's not always the case. 00:31:24.508 --> 00:31:24.928 So. 00:31:25.752 --> 00:31:27.373 I overthink my own shit. 00:31:27.432 --> 00:31:28.932 I don't overthink other people's 00:31:28.938 --> 00:31:29.077 shit. 00:31:29.083 --> 00:31:30.883 I unfortunately overthink other people's. 00:31:30.883 --> 00:31:38.742 I will analyze the whole time, like if I, I generally will say what I mean and mean what I say like I am. 00:31:38.893 --> 00:31:49.932 I've gotten a lot better about that, but I also want other people to do that, and when I feel like somebody maybe isn't being completely forthcoming with me, I will. 00:31:50.472 -->

00:31:54.252 Well, what was that tone and what was that and what, why did they choose this word instead of that word? 00:31:54.252 --> 00:31:55.573 And I, I will do that. 00:31:55.633 --> 00:31:57.373 Oh, okay. 00:31:57.403 --> 00:31:58.542 Not with everybody. 00:31:58.962 --> 00:31:58.992 Okay. 00:31:58.992 --> 00:31:59.982 But with certain people. 00:32:00.192 --> 00:32:00.792 That's why 00:32:00.792 --> 00:32:01.303 it's hard. 00:32:01.303 --> 00:32:01.557 It sucks. 00:32:01.557 --> 00:32:04.272 That's why voice memos are, are good because you're getting the tone. 00:32:04.272 --> 00:32:05.893 That's why we, we, that's why we love them. 00:32:05.893 --> 00:32:08.232 'cause they're just easy and there's no question about it. 00:32:08.712 --> 00:32:10.512 Um, yeah. 00:32:10.843 --> 00:32:14.653 I don't, I think I just get to a point where I read it and it's like, is that bitchy? 00:32:15.012 --> 00:32:15.462 Is that fine? 00:32:15.853 --> 00:32:16.123 Okay. 00:32:16.393 --> 00:32:19.542 And I don't try to deep dive on certain things. 00:32:19.542 --> 00:32:19.678 Yeah, yeah. 00:32:19.682 --> 00:32:23.502 If it's, and it doesn't, I don't really get money of those where I'm questioning. 00:32:23.532 --> 00:32:27.432 'cause a lot of people that I know are doing the voice memo thing, or like a quick call, whatever it may be. 00:32:28.002 --> 00:32:34.423 But even interacting with people, you can tell when you're in person and you're like, oh, you're being a bitch right now. 00:32:34.423 --> 00:32:34.482 Yeah. 00:32:34.542 --> 00:32:36.522 Because of just general tone. 00:32:36.583 --> 00:32:39.432 The word they chose, you're not even questioning like why they choose that word. 00:32:39.432 --> 00:32:40.153 Like, you know, because 00:32:40.363 --> 00:32:40.798 you just heard it. 00:32:41.833 --> 00:32:54.012 Body language and my spidey senses and like the unspoken things there are thi it's like, because that was a form of survival for me growing up. 00:32:54.492 --> 00:32:58.303 You know, having to read the room, having to just the vibes of it. 00:32:59.083 --> 00:33:08.938 I am so hypervigilant to that, so I can tell if somebody is grumpy with me before they even really acknowledge that they're grumpy with me in their own brain. 00:33:09.807 --> 00:33:11.248 I can just freaking feel it. 00:33:11.788 --> 00:33:19.347 And I think that's why I gravitated so much towards vet me and animals, because that's all there is, is body language. 00:33:20.008 --> 00:33:21.448 But they're not trying to hide it. 00:33:21.988 --> 00:33:22.377 No. 00:33:22.498 --> 00:33:26.938 And so I can like, that's why I don't do birds'cause I can't read birds. 00:33:28.018 --> 00:33:30.028 But like I can read dogs and cat. 00:33:30.028 --> 00:33:34.678 Most mammals I'm down with, I can tell you how they're feeling, what's going on. 00:33:34.978 --> 00:33:39.178 If they're stressed, if they're nervous, if they're scared, if like, I get that. 00:33:39.748 --> 00:33:43.857 'cause that's just one of my special powers. 00:33:43.857 --> 00:33:44.218 I guess 00:33:44.218 --> 00:33:47.008 I was gonna say, this sounds a little like woowoo, but I 00:33:47.008 --> 00:33:49.228 don't know how to always fix it or make it better. 00:33:49.228 --> 00:33:51.748 But like I can, I just can feel it. 00:33:52.798 --> 00:33:53.127 Yeah. 00:33:53.428 --> 00:33:53.788 So 00:33:54.897 --> 00:33:56.998 it's uh, yeah, it's a, it's, 00:33:57.538 --> 00:33:59.488 but then with other people, humans, it stresses me out. 00:33:59.488 --> 00:34:03.508 'cause then I'm like hard, you know, my husband will come home and be grumpy 'cause he had a bad day or whatever. 00:34:03.508 --> 00:34:04.528 And I'll be like, are you mad at me? 00:34:05.008 --> 00:34:05.357 Are you mad at me? 00:34:05.893 --> 00:34:06.462 Is he mad at me? 00:34:06.553 --> 00:34:07.212 What if he's mad at me? 00:34:07.363 --> 00:34:08.293 He said this, this way. 00:34:08.353 --> 00:34:11.143 And what if I, and I will, now I'm spiraling. 00:34:11.172 --> 00:34:12.132 Oh. 00:34:12.463 --> 00:34:13.063 So 00:34:13.152 --> 00:34:13.422 yeah. 00:34:13.422 --> 00:34:15.733 So that's probably not, that's not the good place Yeah. 00:34:15.762 --> 00:34:16.393 To be. 00:34:16.572 --> 00:34:17.023 I get it. 00:34:17.293 --> 00:34:25.693 But so, um, I've instituted a 24 hour rule, uh, to where if something makes me upset, I give myself 24 hours. 00:34:26.503 --> 00:34:31.032 'cause I don't always, if I respond right in the moment, it may not come out right. 00:34:31.242 --> 00:34:31.572 Hmm. 00:34:32.472 --> 00:34:33.583 And so. 00:34:34.782 --> 00:34:39.492 I give myself 24 hours to dec from that moment to decide is this something worth bringing up or not? 00:34:40.452 --> 00:34:49.873 And then I don't have to like fester on it for three days before I decide that it's probably worth bringing up or I have to let it go then. 00:34:50.563 --> 00:34:52.003 And that's been incredible. 00:34:52.003 --> 00:34:53.052 I recommend that to everyone. 00:34:53.083 --> 00:34:54.463 That's a good, that's a good thing. 00:34:54.463 --> 00:34:56.802 It's, it's kind of the think before you speak. 00:34:56.807 --> 00:34:56.947 Mm-hmm. 00:34:57.027 --> 00:34:57.228 Or. 00:34:59.233 --> 00:35:04.393 Yeah, there's a lot of examples that I could use for that, but I am, I'm kind of like that as well. 00:35:04.393 --> 00:35:09.432 I never, I give grace too for certain things because you just never know. 00:35:09.432 --> 00:35:15.853 Not everyone, I do know for a fact that not everyone, right, not everyone is like the way you process. 00:35:15.853 --> 00:35:16.963 The way I process. 00:35:16.963 --> 00:35:16.983 Oh yeah. 00:35:16.983 --> 00:35:25.512 So when you are dealing with humans and unfortunately not animals because they are so much easier to kind of just not have to overthink about. 00:35:25.753 --> 00:35:25.902 Yeah. 00:35:25.932 --> 00:35:26.983 But when it is people. 00:35:27.688 --> 00:35:34.197 And you

don't know how they navigate certain situations in their own life because of whatever's going on there and then they impart that on you. 00:35:34.228 --> 00:35:39.807 It's not your duty or responsibility to pick that up, and so that's really difficult. 00:35:39.807 --> 00:35:47.458 I love the think before you send or think before the response, because I give grace for everything. 00:35:47.458 --> 00:35:48.838 So that's. 00:35:49.588 --> 00:35:52.677 I do that and it's a trait to a fault. 00:35:52.768 --> 00:35:56.188 'cause sometimes it shouldn't be, it's not deserved on the other end. 00:35:56.757 --> 00:36:00.657 And again, these are things that don't happen to me much anymore, but they used to more 00:36:00.657 --> 00:36:01.047 Sure. 00:36:01.318 --> 00:36:07.677 And then I learned to kind of set those boundaries of, yeah, no, that's, that's not what this phone is for. 00:36:07.757 --> 00:36:09.648 but I also don't. 00:36:09.992 --> 00:36:18.873 Wanna overthink anyone's email, communication words, anything that anyone says, I have enough in my mind, 00:36:18.963 --> 00:36:19.052 mm-hmm. 00:36:19.293 --> 00:36:23.943 That I'm dealing with and just trying to survive and live and attempt to thrive. 00:36:24.333 --> 00:36:33.032 I have enough enough that I can already overthink that I don't need to add someone else's shit to as well, because then that just makes it more complex. 00:36:33.032 --> 00:36:36.112 So anyone in my life, and I get these things. 00:36:36.637 --> 00:36:42.608 Again, not very often, but sometimes I'll get them from clients where they're not voice memoing me, they're texting me. 00:36:42.608 --> 00:36:44.708 So then it's like, you gotta read those words. 00:36:44.708 --> 00:36:44.797 Mm-hmm. 00:36:44.797 --> 00:36:46.182 Or just pick up the phone and call because. 00:36:47.032 --> 00:36:48.652 In business transactions. 00:36:48.652 --> 00:36:50.753 I am so the fan of having the conversation. 00:36:50.992 --> 00:36:51.742 Please don't text me. 00:36:51.802 --> 00:36:53.902 I mean, if it's a quick answer, quick question. 00:36:53.902 --> 00:36:53.992 Sure. 00:36:53.992 --> 00:36:59.842 But on a monumental something, I don't wanna respond to you on that via text because I don't know what you're thinking about the tone. 00:36:59.842 --> 00:37:02.003 So now I'm overthinking how you're gonna react. 00:37:02.003 --> 00:37:03.922 And I just said, I don't wanna do that. 00:37:03.922 --> 00:37:11.452 I don't wanna have to overthink how someone else processes something that I say because they didn't take the extra step to get the clarity that they needed. 00:37:11.452 --> 00:37:12.592 Yeah, I'm huge on clarity. 00:37:12.652 --> 00:37:12.862 Yeah. 00:37:12.862 --> 00:37:14.632 Just tell me. 00:37:15.427 --> 00:37:19.717 Like straightforward, have the conversation because you, you go through it real quick. 00:37:19.717 --> 00:37:19.807 Mm-hmm. 00:37:20.108 --> 00:37:23.407 And you don't sit on something that you had to think of before you

texted it. 00:37:24.038 --> 00:37:25.507 You had to brainstorm it first. 00:37:25.507 --> 00:37:26.617 And I'm not talking about bad stuff. 00:37:26.617 --> 00:37:34.597 I'm talking about like ideas that people have in the sense of, hey, well I was thinking for this particular situation or this transaction, and it's like, hold on. 00:37:34.807 --> 00:37:36.188 You're talking about legal documents now. 00:37:36.188 --> 00:37:37.728 Like contracts, you need to call me. 00:37:38.268 --> 00:37:39.858 This isn't something that we talk about on text. 00:37:40.367 --> 00:37:41.597 Or with anything serious. 00:37:41.628 --> 00:37:41.688 Yeah. 00:37:41.688 --> 00:37:42.887 I don't do that with anyone. 00:37:42.887 --> 00:37:48.918 I don't want to, but I don't, I don't, don't be in a, don't put me in a position to overthink what you meant Just call me if it's a question. 00:37:48.978 --> 00:37:49.277 Yeah. 00:37:49.668 --> 00:37:53.898 But I definitely like to take the time to respond when I have it, and when I don't have to answer on the fly. 00:37:54.047 --> 00:37:54.438 Yeah. 00:37:54.438 --> 00:37:55.188 I don't like that. 00:37:55.217 --> 00:37:56.358 I just don't want the pressure 00:37:57.318 --> 00:37:58.788 on the thought of clarity. 00:38:00.108 --> 00:38:04.188 Something that says, something that somebody said to me once, 00:38:05.628 --> 00:38:06.318 you know, I leave all 00:38:06.318 --> 00:38:06.407 this. 00:38:06.407 --> 00:38:07.697 I was gonna say, you can keep it or leave it. 00:38:07.697 --> 00:38:08.117 I don't care. 00:38:08.117 --> 00:38:08.568 I do that. 00:38:08.597 --> 00:38:11.117 If you talk to me any amount of time, you know, I do that. 00:38:12.947 --> 00:38:22.277 That was a game changer for my overthinking this, because I think of myself as a fairly competent communicator, right? 00:38:22.547 --> 00:38:25.697 So the people who. 00:38:28.398 --> 00:38:30.827 Want to understand you. 00:38:31.157 --> 00:38:36.257 The people who are for you will break their legs tripping over themself to understand you. 00:38:37.038 --> 00:38:54.648 The people who are determined to make you the villain or don't want to understand like they, you could make it the most crystal clear set of words anybody has ever come up with in their lives, and they will find a way to misunderstand you. 00:38:55.382 --> 00:38:55.893 Oh, for sure. 00:38:56.103 --> 00:38:58.083 And that was like, oh yeah. 00:38:59.132 --> 00:39:00.902 And that made me feel a lot better. 00:39:00.932 --> 00:39:09.992 'cause I've definitely had, you know, I'm just falling all over myself to try to make my point as clear as possible because being misunderstood just breaks my heart. 00:39:09.992 --> 00:39:13.472 I don't, I don't want somebody to misunderstand what I'm saying. 00:39:13.952 --> 00:39:15.032 And then they do anyway. 00:39:15.032 --> 00:39:15.722 And I'm just like, 00:39:15.722 --> 00:39:20.733 especially when you're trying actively, you're actively trying to not be misunderstood, to be as clear as possible. 00:39:21.032 --> 00:39:21.092 Yeah. 00:39:21.092 --> 00:39:28.472 You said something about this, um, before when you've said it's like the people who you say, I love pancakes. 00:39:28.472 --> 00:39:29.583 Well, why do you hate waffles? 00:39:29.643 --> 00:39:29.702 Yeah. 00:39:30.483 --> 00:39:42.483 It's, there's always going to someone, which is why when it comes to the concept of overthinking and the situational or underlying stress and all the root causes of it, and you know, the anxiety. 00:39:42.887 --> 00:39:52.637 These are things that we have enough of in our life, and I wasn't even bringing this up to bring it into a other people conversation, but sure. 00:39:52.637 --> 00:40:00.797 That adds so much, so many elements to anyone who struggles with just getting through their daily routine without being able to focus. 00:40:01.518 --> 00:40:05.748 Maybe it's a DD, maybe you're just overthinking'cause you have high anxiety for other reasons. 00:40:05.748 --> 00:40:05.958 Maybe. 00:40:05.963 --> 00:40:06.168 Maybe it's 00:40:06.168 --> 00:40:06.648 Maybelline. 00:40:06.648 --> 00:40:07.518 Maybe it's Maybelline. 00:40:07.637 --> 00:40:08.628 There's, that's what I'm saying. 00:40:08.628 --> 00:40:10.847 There's always a whole thing. 00:40:10.878 --> 00:40:11.117 Yeah. 00:40:11.552 --> 00:40:22.503 Where when someone else, unfortunately, who maybe hasn't done the work or isn't doing the work on themselves to kind of know better or know different, that's where it becomes really difficult. 00:40:22.503 --> 00:40:35.302 So in a professional aspect, I see this with everybody, and it's difficult because I'm just trying to sit over here and kind of move through doing everything I need to do. 00:40:35.302 --> 00:40:37.822 I've got enough in my head that I don't need to analyze that. 00:40:38.722 --> 00:40:39.353 I don't know. 00:40:39.353 --> 00:40:42.682 You were mad because I said I couldn't go to lunch with you on that day. 00:40:42.742 --> 00:40:45.262 And then I tried to reschedule to a different day and now it's like, forget it. 00:40:45.802 --> 00:40:49.822 So now you're thinking, okay, well she's obviously, or he's obviously mad at me, whatever it may be. 00:40:49.822 --> 00:40:59.152 But that, and that's a stupid petty example, but that's also just the point of I don't have the capacity to navigate someone else's life. 00:40:59.213 --> 00:41:01.583 And I also don't wanna overthink. 00:41:02.182 --> 00:41:03.472 Behavior of other people. 00:41:03.532 --> 00:41:03.682 Mm-hmm. 00:41:03.983 --> 00:41:06.592 I think most overthinkers do that. 00:41:06.623 --> 00:41:06.682 Yeah. 00:41:06.682 --> 00:41:17.213 I think most overthinkers they take that one conversation or those words and the, this isn't a, this isn't like an individualized, like it is the way you do it, but I'm saying this isn't a soul, 00:41:17.242 --> 00:41:18.382 it's not in a vacuum. 00:41:18.443 --> 00:41:18.713 No. 00:41:18.713 -->

00:41:18.833 Like 00:41:18.833 --> 00:41:20.452 there are a lot of variables. 00:41:20.483 --> 00:41:21.538 There's a lot of VA or. 00:41:22.327 --> 00:41:30.338 There's also a lot of variables and vacuums, um, which is weird to use vacuum 'cause I'm, I'm trying to research vacuums right now, so I've got vacuum on the brain. 00:41:30.697 --> 00:41:38.617 But yeah, there's a lot of different variables and I don't think it's a, a problem that maybe just your ex I think it's very widespread. 00:41:38.648 --> 00:41:38.797 Yeah. 00:41:38.797 --> 00:41:41.197 In the sense of who overthinks the behaviors of others. 00:41:41.708 --> 00:41:45.878 I just stopped doing it because it was to, to the best that I can. 00:41:45.878 --> 00:41:47.557 There's obviously still a little bit. 00:41:48.202 --> 00:41:50.242 I stopped giving it so much power. 00:41:50.452 --> 00:41:50.813 Yeah. 00:41:50.873 --> 00:41:52.463 Because that's what it was doing. 00:41:52.523 --> 00:42:02.032 I would, you know, when I turned from the person that said yes to doing everything for everybody, and then I started to say no because I had to prioritize my own health and people started now. 00:42:02.032 --> 00:42:03.983 Well that's bitchy or that's selfish. 00:42:04.492 --> 00:42:11.242 No, it's just the one time in my life that I'm actually standing up for myself and saying, no, I can't do that because I have to prioritize my own health. 00:42:11.572 --> 00:42:12.652 Saying no to committees. 00:42:12.652 --> 00:42:14.753 That was huge for me to be able to finally. 00:42:15.547 --> 00:42:19.447 Do that because I'd been just, well, I have, I mean, I have to, right? 00:42:20.378 --> 00:42:21.608 Am I gonna be viewed differently? 00:42:21.668 --> 00:42:25.358 And then when I got to that point where I thought, I actually don't care how I'm viewed. 00:42:25.358 --> 00:42:26.887 I need to do this for myself. 00:42:26.887 --> 00:42:32.947 Because if I'm not even around to defend myself because I said yes all the time, then what good is this? 00:42:32.947 --> 00:42:33.277 Yeah. 00:42:33.938 --> 00:42:37.717 Well, and other people's opinion of you is none of your business. 00:42:37.838 --> 00:42:38.288 Totally. 00:42:38.887 --> 00:42:41.407 That's like one I wanna have that embroidered on a pillow. 00:42:41.438 --> 00:42:43.148 Like that's just, that was. 00:42:44.378 --> 00:42:45.547 That also changed my life. 00:42:45.577 --> 00:42:46.358 Like, oh, okay. 00:42:46.958 --> 00:42:47.257 Yeah, 00:42:48.188 --> 00:42:49.628 I'll make myself as clear as possible. 00:42:49.628 --> 00:42:53.047 And if you choose not to get what I'm saying, then that's your problem. 00:42:53.077 --> 00:42:53.467 Yeah. 00:42:53.467 --> 00:42:58.447 And we always say like, you don't, there's so many people in the world, you don't have to like everybody. 00:42:58.478 --> 00:42:58.838 Yeah. 00:42:59.257 --> 00:43:01.717 I mean, I could, I could look on tv. 00:43:01.777 --> 00:43:04.867 So many people on TV I don't like, I

don't wanna be friends with them. 00:43:05.257 --> 00:43:08.197 But the same way for us, not everyone's gonna like you, and that's okay. 00:43:08.288 --> 00:43:08.617 Yeah. 00:43:08.648 --> 00:43:09.458 It's totally fine. 00:43:09.458 --> 00:43:12.427 This is that thing called life and finding your, we talked about this. 00:43:13.237 --> 00:43:13.958 We always do. 00:43:13.958 --> 00:43:16.177 We like our, we like our core people. 00:43:16.327 --> 00:43:16.898 It's good. 00:43:16.898 --> 00:43:22.538 It's a good feeling to have that and not have to feel like you have to chameleon to everybody. 00:43:22.568 --> 00:43:22.777 Yeah. 00:43:22.777 --> 00:43:23.737 That's so much. 00:43:23.918 --> 00:43:24.637 And then why? 00:43:24.668 --> 00:43:28.027 'cause you're worried about what people are thinking That's overthinking someone else's feelings. 00:43:28.027 --> 00:43:29.197 Like don't worry about it. 00:43:29.197 --> 00:43:29.588 Yeah. 00:43:29.797 --> 00:43:31.027 Just focus on you. 00:43:31.447 --> 00:43:31.717 Yeah. 00:43:31.958 --> 00:43:32.347 I dunno. 00:43:32.407 --> 00:43:36.068 I, I think for me, when I stopped giving it so much power. 00:43:37.253 --> 00:43:41.842 That particular part was recent with all the committees, you know, that's like of this year. 00:43:41.842 --> 00:43:41.932 Mm-hmm. 00:43:41.932 --> 00:43:53.242 I trimmed down last year a lot, but with the stop giving peoples like, stop overthinking so much about people that came before, and that was even game changing for me because I thought, yeah, okay. 00:43:53.302 --> 00:43:58.643 I mean, oh well, I, I get, I will overthink, I think about. 00:43:59.992 --> 00:44:03.112 I like, and I, I talk about this in therapy, so I don't care to share. 00:44:03.143 --> 00:44:05.213 I mean, I don't care that I'm sharing it. 00:44:05.963 --> 00:44:07.068 I, I live my life. 00:44:08.197 --> 00:44:11.648 Pretty good in the sense of I treat people with respect. 00:44:12.007 --> 00:44:13.358 I help you when I can. 00:44:13.418 --> 00:44:14.438 I'm very kind. 00:44:14.438 --> 00:44:15.367 I'm very genuine. 00:44:15.367 --> 00:44:16.628 There's nothing fake about me. 00:44:16.958 --> 00:44:20.527 There's nothing bitchy about me unless you push me in a corner, then everyone's a bitch. 00:44:20.947 --> 00:44:22.628 Um, or I'm defending myself. 00:44:22.657 --> 00:44:22.748 Mm-hmm. 00:44:23.168 --> 00:44:27.367 Or you're cruel, then I'm, I mean, it's gonna come across as bitchy, but it's really just defending. 00:44:27.367 --> 00:44:33.362 I'm not gonna go be mean for the sake of being mean, but there is that weird part that I can't. 00:44:34.478 --> 00:44:45.068 Knowing in my own mind that I can't, I can't fill in the narrative for what someone else is viewing that as. 00:44:45.577 --> 00:44:56.018 Sometimes that's a thought that I'm just thinking that story's gonna be completely different, or that version of events is gonna be totally different, but you just kinda have to let that shit go too. 00:44:56.018 --> 00:44:56.077 Yeah. 00:44:56.077 --> 00:45:00.248 And also, I know who I am and people who know me know me. 00:45:00.248 --> 00:45:02.347 I'm not a mean per like, whatever. 00:45:03.367 --> 00:45:03.547 Well, it's 00:45:03.547 --> 00:45:05.978 like that, but people get the version of you that they deserve. 00:45:06.998 --> 00:45:07.387 Yeah. 00:45:07.387 --> 00:45:11.498 But it's also when you're saying you don't wanna be misunderstood, I also don't wanna be misunderstood. 00:45:11.503 --> 00:45:11.543 Yeah. 00:45:11.543 --> 00:45:15.487 But I also don't wanna be misrepresented. 00:45:15.577 --> 00:45:15.878 Yeah. 00:45:16.297 --> 00:45:24.128 Because that I've worked, I've spent a lot of time and self, you know, work to be the person that I am. 00:45:24.128 --> 00:45:31.327 So sometimes I just think, gosh, isn't it just funny how, kind of like when we were talking about with Joey about Google reviews or something. 00:45:31.333 --> 00:45:31.512 Mm-hmm. 00:45:31.592 --> 00:45:31.873 You know. 00:45:32.813 --> 00:45:35.003 You always do your best at everything. 00:45:36.202 --> 00:45:37.342 And hold on. 00:45:37.713 --> 00:45:40.472 I don't even know where we were before that pause, but 00:45:40.472 --> 00:45:40.983 I don't either. 00:45:41.463 --> 00:45:47.193 I think I'm gonna say do what you can and we're all guilty of it. 00:45:47.222 --> 00:45:55.972 We're all guilty of going down our own mind and, and just getting trapped in our own thoughts, but, take cool necessary steps that you need to take. 00:45:55.972 --> 00:46:00.172 I think that that's great to have solutions, be solutions based in everything. 00:46:00.172 --> 00:46:06.023 So if you're an overthinker like us, just know what your know, what your end goal is. 00:46:06.052 --> 00:46:12.143 If you wanna find a solution to a problem or if you wanna sit there and be stuck there. 00:46:12.802 --> 00:46:14.813 Those are two choices that you can distinctly make. 00:46:15.532 --> 00:46:24.293 But that would be my big and don't, don't say things to people without saying what you mean, when you talk mean, what you say. 00:46:24.293 --> 00:46:36.233 Well, and also think about it a little bit, like you don't need to think on it for five straight days until you're just so wrapped up, wrapped around the axle that you can't even function anymore. 00:46:36.282 --> 00:46:43.842 but think about it for 12 to 24 hours before you just like go off, you know, think about it a little bit, and there's two sides to every coin. 00:46:43.842 --> 00:46:51.132 So there's the positives to overthinking and the negatives like, try to shift it just a little more to the positive side. 00:46:51.972 --> 00:46:52.273 Yeah. 00:46:52.318 --> 00:46:55.512 And, and don't let the weight of other people's opinions. 00:46:55.572 --> 00:46:57.253 Don't overthink that 'cause 00:46:57.702 --> 00:46:58.572 Well that's a waste of time. 00:46:58.572 --> 00:46:59.322 They don't matter. 00:46:59.382 --> 00:46:59.652 Yeah. 00:47:00.043 --> 00:47:00.282 Yeah. 00:47:00.793 --> 00:47:03.577 So on that note, I guess have a good day to everyone. 00:47:04.422 --> 00:47:08.532 Except anyone who doesn't know how to read a room, just read the room. 00:47:08.563 --> 00:47:08.802 Yeah. 00:47:09.463 --> 00:47:16.393 I feel like that's becoming more of a thing these days and we got out of it for a while, so let's go back to when it was the thing. 00:47:16.452 --> 00:47:17.413 Sense the tone 00:47:17.472 --> 00:47:18.943 when they know how to read the room. 00:47:19.003 --> 00:47:19.063 Yeah. 00:47:19.068 --> 00:47:19.208 Yes. 00:47:19.277 --> 00:47:19.568 Okay. 00:47:19.677 --> 00:47:19.967 Okay. 00:47:20.347 --> 00:47:20.568 Bye.