TRANSKRIBEERI 🔗
00:00:02
Speaker 1: Imagine, if you will, that you are in a place of great beauty.
00:00:11
Speaker 2: Some teenage boys.
00:00:12
Speaker 3: Walk past you.
00:00:14
Speaker 1: They yell out, Hey, bitch tits. The world, you see, is a place of paradox, of beauty and cruelty. It will cut you off at the knees, then gift you a pair of Yeezys. And that, my friends, is why you always, always need.
00:00:38
Speaker 3: A buck up. Ba-ba, ba-ba, ba-ba, ba-ba, ba-ba, ba-ba, ba.
00:00:44
Speaker 4: Hey!
00:00:45
Speaker 3: Ba-da-ba-da-ba-da-ba-da-ba-da-ba-ba. Boo-boo-boo-da-ba-boo.
00:00:50
Speaker 4: I doffs me tiny hat to you, sir.
00:00:53
Speaker 3: Kate Lanebrook. I doffs me tiny hat to you.
00:00:57
Speaker 2: We found a tiny little hut in the studio.
00:00:59
Speaker 3: And also to our leprechaun in the corner. Where is she? There she be. There she be. She just pops up. She was just painting a shamrock.
00:01:07
Speaker 2: You've got the attitude of someone who's wrapped up the year mentally. You know, you've got real December 27th energy right now. A void of any sort of.
00:01:22
Speaker 3: Conversation or energy.
00:01:23
Speaker 2: Or care factor. Just madness.
00:01:25
Speaker 3: You've lost the absolute plot.
00:01:27
Speaker 5: I have.
00:01:28
Speaker 4: I daftly tiny had to use her. And also this is like something that might have come out of a Christmas cracker.
00:01:34
Speaker 2: And I did try and wrap up the year in October and got yelled at by my husband.
00:01:37
Speaker 3: But not by me.
00:01:38
Speaker 2: But mid-November, here we are. I was completely on board. We are in the Friday morning of the year.
00:01:47
Speaker 3: When does the year finish? On the Sunday? No, Friday night. On the Saturday, Friday night. Okay. Okay.
00:01:53
Speaker 1: Come on.
00:01:55
Speaker 3: Nothing matters in November. All right.
00:01:57
Speaker 2: Nothing matters in December.
00:01:58
Speaker 3: Yeah, no, I agree.
00:01:59
Speaker 2: Except my birthday, of course.
00:02:00
Speaker 3: But why do people ask us to just keep going?
00:02:03
Speaker 2: December 11th, send it over.
00:02:05
Speaker 4: Why?
00:02:05
Speaker 2: Can I do PayPal for money or something?
00:02:07
Speaker 3: Why not? For your birthday?
00:02:10
Speaker 2: My birthday.
00:02:10
Speaker 4: A dust me tiny hat. What about this as a birthday present for you?
00:02:14
Speaker 3: Thank you so much.
00:02:15
Speaker 2: I've told you how much I've ruined my life with the dates of things. Just this abyss of no events.
00:02:22
Speaker 3: Sorry, but who are you? Oh, I'm Nath Valvo.
00:02:25
Speaker 2: Sorry, I've kicked off.
00:02:26
Speaker 3: Nath Valvo, or as I refer to you.
00:02:28
Speaker 2: What do you refer me to? And I'm not around, actually.
00:02:30
Speaker 5: Oh, no, no.
00:02:31
Speaker 3: What's that? I can't tell you that.
00:02:32
Speaker 2: Can't say. This is quick and bold.
00:02:34
Speaker 3: Nate Valvo.
00:02:35
Speaker 2: You shouldn't even type it.
00:02:36
Speaker 3: Nate Valvo. I think you're allowed to say it.
00:02:39
Speaker 2: Yeah, but I was saying that you said it.
00:02:40
Speaker 3: Because you are one. A big one.
00:02:42
Speaker 4: Okay.
00:02:47
Speaker 3: Gosh, I can't wait till we're all released.
00:02:49
Speaker 2: Oh, from each other.
00:02:50
Speaker 1: No.
00:02:51
Speaker 3: Trained. What? To the shackles that hold us back.
00:02:55
Speaker 2: Classic November speak.
00:02:57
Speaker 3: It really is. And I'll have plenty of time to repent at leisure in January. Good. I'll be like, did I really say that?
00:03:04
Speaker 2: Take Feb off too while you're at it.
00:03:06
Speaker 4: I'll be like, Martha Stewart must have been who we were talking about last week.
00:03:09
Speaker 3: What about? About her costumes. Seemed like a good thing at the time.
00:03:14
Speaker 2: Happy Halloween.
00:03:15
Speaker 3: Happy Halloween.
00:03:16
Speaker 2: This is what happens in the space of three weeks in my life.
00:03:20
Speaker 3: My birthday.
00:03:21
Speaker 4: Yeah.
00:03:23
Speaker 3: What date are you?
00:03:23
Speaker 4: 11th.
00:03:23
Speaker 3: Your actual date? 11th of the 11th.
00:03:26
Speaker 2: 11th of the 12th of December.
00:03:28
Speaker 3: Oh, yes, 11th of December. Oh, yeah, because you're two days before Peter.
00:03:31
Speaker 4: Mm-hmm.
00:03:31
Speaker 2: My birthday, Christmas, Cody's birthday, New Year's Eve, wedding anniversary, all within three weeks.
00:03:38
Speaker 3: I don't like it.
00:03:39
Speaker 2: I hate it.
00:03:40
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't. Let's clap that. Clap it. But I don't like it. No, I'm with you. It's too much.
00:03:44
Speaker 2: And a shout-out to Pete and a shout-out to all the Buckheads who have birthdays in December.
00:03:50
Speaker 4: I just find it even selfish of my husband to have a birthday so close to Christmas.
00:03:56
Speaker 2: Do you know how many double presents we don't get?
00:03:59
Speaker 3: Oh, don't you? I always do.
00:04:00
Speaker 2: Yes, but growing up, I and his uncles, extended family.
00:04:05
Speaker 3: Oh, yes, they roll into one. He's one present for both.
00:04:07
Speaker 5: Of course, yeah.
00:04:08
Speaker 3: Unacceptable. Do you still got present greed?
00:04:11
Speaker 4: No.
00:04:13
Speaker 2: Okay, this is going to shock you because you are. I don't really do anything for my birthday ever. So I don't really get presents from anyone except Cody.
00:04:24
Speaker 3: What? No, but I meant by choice. Hang on.
00:04:27
Speaker 2: By choice.
00:04:27
Speaker 4: No, no.
00:04:27
Speaker 2: Oh.
00:04:29
Speaker 4: Sarge, did you hear the involuntary?
00:04:31
Speaker 3: She hasn't even been introduced and you've moved her to tears. You don't do. And you know to get tears from, I mean from.
00:04:42
Speaker 4: That black-hearted, the desiccated, the walnut husk that nestles.
00:04:50
Speaker 3: In her chest.
00:04:51
Speaker 2: And not just in November, all year.
00:04:53
Speaker 4: All year.
00:04:54
Speaker 3: All year.
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All year. To wring a tear from that, from those tear ducts. I'll tell you. Tell me what.
00:05:04
Speaker 4: There are sand dunes in the Sahara with more moisture than her tear ducts. And yet you rang a tear from her very eye.
00:05:15
Speaker 2: However, here is something, Gavin. We have something in common.
00:05:18
Speaker 3: What is it?
00:05:18
Speaker 2: You don't do your birthday. Besides Sasha, you don't do your birthday.
00:05:23
Speaker 3: No, I'm not overly comfortable with my birthday. See, isn't that odd? Which is unlikely.
00:05:27
Speaker 2: I have a theory. I have a theory.
00:05:29
Speaker 3: Oh, I love a theory. We haven't had a theory for a while.
00:05:32
Speaker 2: Well, let's be honest.
00:05:33
Speaker 3: Okay.
00:05:34
Speaker 2: We get so much attention from our job, we don't want it on our birthday.
00:05:37
Speaker 3: Oh, maybe. We get that. But I've always been like that.
00:05:41
Speaker 2: We're very lucky to get that hit in other ways.
00:05:43
Speaker 4: I thought it was because I grew up without birthdays.
00:05:46
Speaker 2: I'm going to say another thing.
00:05:48
Speaker 3: But you didn't.
00:05:50
Speaker 2: Attention seekers in.
00:05:51
Speaker 3: General, i.e.
00:05:52
Speaker 2: Me, look at what I do for a living, you. Yes. In general, attention seekers aren't huge on their birthday for some reason.
00:06:00
Speaker 3: But Sash... I'm.
00:06:01
Speaker 2: Going to throw that out there.
00:06:02
Speaker 3: Is not an attention seeker.
00:06:04
Speaker 2: But she loves her birthday.
00:06:05
Speaker 3: In fact, she.
00:06:06
Speaker 4: Couldn't do more to blend into the background.
00:06:11
Speaker 1: Wow.
00:06:13
Speaker 2: If beige were a person... And yet.
00:06:19
Speaker 4: You don't love a birthday, do you?
00:06:21
Speaker 3: I hate a birthday. He hates birthday. So there's a theory.
00:06:24
Speaker 2: No, but very quickly going through my Rolodex of attention seekers in my life, none of them are huge on the birthday. But they're huge on attention every other day of the year, i.e.
00:06:34
Speaker 3: The person sitting opposite me.
00:06:35
Speaker 4: Okay, no, that's a very wobbly theory and I suggest we move on. I love positing a theory.
00:06:41
Speaker 3: But do you know what? Someone had to break the bad news to Einstein.
00:06:44
Speaker 4: His first thing would have been E equals MC to the power of three.
00:06:49
Speaker 3: And someone would have gone, no, mate.
00:06:51
Speaker 2: You're an idiot.
00:06:51
Speaker 3: No, mate. Would have been you. It would have been back off. You know, he was a real freak.
00:06:58
Speaker 2: I have heard from you.
00:06:59
Speaker 3: Oh, have I told you? Message from Buck? About his cousin. He had an affair with his cousin. Oh, no.
00:07:04
Speaker 4: And he wouldn't let his wife come into his study and she had to leave his meals outside.
00:07:08
Speaker 3: It was really mean. He was really mean. You seem so annoyed by it.
00:07:15
Speaker 4: No, I'm just
like, we've got to get over this thing of expecting all the people.
00:07:21
Speaker 3: that we admire to be good people. Yes.
00:07:26
Speaker 4: Basically, we have to accept that none of them are. And let's just work from that. It's a more mature, because it makes sense.
00:07:35
Speaker 2: Well, you told me to enjoy Michael Jackson's music.
00:07:37
Speaker 3: Correct. Otherwise, you've only got a bad guy.
00:07:39
Speaker 2: So I'm telling you, to all the people that enjoy X equals MC.
00:07:43
Speaker 3: Squared, enjoy it. E equals MC squared. I don't know. I failed math. E equals MC. I think it's physics. I failed that too. Me too. So I don't even know why what he did was so important, to be honest.
00:07:55
Speaker 2: Or were you good at it?
00:07:56
Speaker 3: Do you know what?
00:07:56
Speaker 2: I'm going to call it here.
00:07:57
Speaker 5: What?
00:07:58
Speaker 2: Call it.
00:07:58
Speaker 3: Overrated. Einstein. Overrated. Give that a musical sting. I've always said it. You should.
00:08:06
Speaker 2: Also, one of those people that was around a lot later than I thought in the timeline of history.
00:08:13
Speaker 3: You've said that before. It was a recap. Okay, yeah, no, no, but I don't even know when he was. Like I said, overrated.
00:08:20
Speaker 4: I've got no interest in talking about that trumped up little man.
00:08:24
Speaker 3: We're snappy. We need a break. Only with Einstein. Not with you. I adore you.
00:08:29
Speaker 2: You've shut down two theories I've had twice.
00:08:31
Speaker 3: Sorry, no. One of them, to be fair, was Einstein's theory. I shut down those. Shut down his theory. Yours are more than welcome.
00:08:40
Speaker 2: But what were you good at at school if you weren't good at math or?
00:08:43
Speaker 4: Come on.
00:08:44
Speaker 3: No, I'm being serious. English. Great at English. And theatre.
00:08:48
Speaker 2: Theatre, okay.
00:08:49
Speaker 3: That was all.
00:08:51
Speaker 4: And when I did theatre, it was only a relatively new subject. And get a load of this, they thought it was hard. So I got a really good value for it. Now I think the world's realised it's not hard, so you don't get much credit. wait for it in your selection when they're working at whatever school.
00:09:08
Speaker 3: I've lost interest myself.
00:09:10
Speaker 2: I mean, yes, because my school did that thing. If you were really good at a subject at the end of year nine, you were allowed to do the Victorian year 11.
00:09:22
Speaker 3: I've lost interest. Yeah, you could go ahead. All this stuff. I was just telling you about my life. No, no, I know.
00:09:29
Speaker 2: Let me buzz in. That's three shutdowns in five minutes.
00:09:32
Speaker 4: No, you can't count the Einstein shutdown as yours.
00:09:37
Speaker 3: Come on. I've still got one. You're going to call it.
00:09:40
Speaker 2: Einstein is overrated.
00:09:43
Speaker 3: Einstein, a no-no.
00:09:45
Speaker 2: Easy.
00:09:45
Speaker 3: All right.
00:09:46
Speaker 4: Okay.
00:09:47
Speaker 3: I want to buzz in and guess what you were good at at school. Oh, I mean, really? Come on. Some big mystery?
00:09:52
Speaker 2: Go.
00:09:52
Speaker 3: Oh, is that you?
00:09:55
Speaker 2: This is November. What's wrong with us?
00:09:57
Speaker 3: No, you know what? We're hanging by a thread. What? wrong with us? And do you know what? If people aren't like us, there's something wrong with them. Do you know what? We're going to punch on. On chons. We don't have the energy for chons. But you know what we will do?
00:10:11
Speaker 2: What?
00:10:11
Speaker 3: We will work ourselves up into a frenzy. Yes, we will. But seated. Seated frenzy.
00:10:17
Speaker 2: And it's our job, by the way, Kate, not sure if you know this, to raise the buckheads up who are also hanging by a thread.
00:10:25
Speaker 3: We see you. You've still got work. We hear you.
00:10:28
Speaker 2: School's not finished.
00:10:29
Speaker 3: We are with you.
00:10:30
Speaker 2: If the ladies are listening, let's be true and honest. They've got to organise Christmas because old mate's not going to help.
00:10:35
Speaker 3: Work's not finished. And also, if you're working... There's always some who's gobbled up all the working from home allowance. Gobbling up. Someone's got to turn up and it's you.
00:10:45
Speaker 2: No one's replying to your Christmas message. Is he coming? Is the boyfriend coming? Is old mate coming?
00:10:50
Speaker 3: You know who will come. Am I cooking food for 12 or 20? You know who'll come?
00:10:53
Speaker 4: Who?
00:10:54
Speaker 3: The ones who arrive empty handed.
00:10:56
Speaker 2: They always do.
00:10:57
Speaker 3: And empty stomached. Those people. In my defence. You could set your clock. In my defence.
00:11:03
Speaker 2: Yes, yes. I do play and hang out with the kids.
00:11:06
Speaker 3: Giving mum and dad a day off.
00:11:08
Speaker 2: We've all got a different role to play.
00:11:10
Speaker 4: It just isolated that bit.
00:11:15
Speaker 3: That's not going to work out well for you. But I love it.
00:11:19
Speaker 2: My family will never forget the day, the year, that Cody, my husband, made a ham.
00:11:28
Speaker 4: Did he glaze it?
00:11:31
Speaker 2: It was a two-day process.
00:11:32
Speaker 4: What?
00:11:33
Speaker 2: Of oven, out of oven, glazing, this, that. He's going here to get this nut, here to get this. They speak about it so often it actually annoys me.
00:11:43
Speaker 3: Was it a stunning ham? It was unbelievable.
00:11:45
Speaker 2: I do a glazed ham. I don't even eat that animal.
00:11:48
Speaker 1: No, I don't.
00:11:49
Speaker 2: And I ate that.
00:11:50
Speaker 3: Yes. It was a day off. I don't love ham, but I love a glazed ham.
00:11:54
Speaker 2: I don't eat pig, but that day I did because, oh, my God. They mentioned it.
00:12:00
Speaker 3: Why did he stop doing it?
00:12:01
Speaker 2: I don't know. It's a good question. But they mention it all the time.
00:12:05
Speaker 3: Do you know who mentions it
all the time?
00:12:06
Speaker 4: Him.
00:12:07
Speaker 3: An auntie.
00:12:08
Speaker 2: And you know an auntie will never get over a good food that wasn't made by them because quietly they're annoyed.
00:12:15
Speaker 4: But also because they've done so much catering themselves in their life, Nate Valvo.
00:12:20
Speaker 5: Mm-hmm.
00:12:21
Speaker 4: That there's nothing as delicious as something that's been made for you, which I believe prisoners should be.
00:12:28
Speaker 3: More grateful for. I've always said that.
00:12:31
Speaker 2: I've always said it.
00:12:33
Speaker 4: I mean, just someone opening the trap door and sliding in some Weet-Bix.
00:12:37
Speaker 3: Yum. I'm like, yeah. Sign me up. That's an Airbnb. Hello.
00:12:41
Speaker 2: And also, here's a new joke I wrote on this topic.
00:12:44
Speaker 3: You ready? Is it for your show next year?
00:12:46
Speaker 2: Yes. Maybe it won't work, but here we go.
00:12:48
Speaker 3: Okay, let's try it.
00:12:49
Speaker 2: Does anyone else think their parents would die of shock if they saw how nice you were to other people's parents?
00:12:55
Speaker 4: Oh, yes.
00:12:58
Speaker 2: If I ever gave my parents the me that my friend's parents get, their heads would explode.
00:13:04
Speaker 3: Okay.
00:13:05
Speaker 4: So do you know as a parent, one of the first, because everyone, actually, you know those people who say everyone's doing the best they can. No, some people are not doing the best they can. Some people aren't even trying.
00:13:16
Speaker 3: Have you heard this pod? Okay.
00:13:19
Speaker 4: However, generally, there's an expectation.
00:13:22
Speaker 3: That people are good people trying to raise good kids.
00:13:27
Speaker 4: The first measure that you get, and it's so beautiful, isn't it, Sash, when your son or daughter comes back from a play date.
00:13:38
Speaker 3: Right. And the parents say. You've got a good kid. Oh, they've got beautiful manners, they say. But you are like.
00:13:47
Speaker 2: A what?
00:13:49
Speaker 3: Like a cartoon triple, nay, quadruple take.
00:13:53
Speaker 2: Your eyes fall out.
00:13:55
Speaker 4: You cannot believe it because this same little beast at home shows no, like you even doubt that they've ever heard one of the thousands of times you've repeated over their short life.
00:14:10
Speaker 2: They're listening.
00:14:11
Speaker 3: Please, thank you, please, thank you. What do you say? What do you say?
00:14:15
Speaker 2: What do you say?
00:14:15
Speaker 3: It is so gratifying when you hear that. In my defence.
00:14:22
Speaker 4: Yes.
00:14:23
Speaker 3: In my defence. Yes.
00:14:25
Speaker 2: I have the same reaction when I see the way my parents are with their grandkids.
00:14:30
Speaker 5: Oh, yes.
00:14:30
Speaker 2: Oh, you're fun now, are you? Oh, yes.
00:14:33
Speaker 3: Oh, okay.
00:14:34
Speaker 2: Where was that game when I was growing up?
00:14:36
Speaker 4: Yes.
00:14:37
Speaker 3: I think a lot of grandparents talk about that.
Oh, red cordial.
00:14:40
Speaker 5: Interesting.
00:14:40
Speaker 4: Unless, of course, the other thing people talk about is Boomer grandparents who don't want to look after their kids.
00:14:47
Speaker 3: Which, yeah. Hang on, say that again. So boomer grandparents who don't want to look after their kids' kids.
00:14:52
Speaker 2: Oh, sorry, yes. Sorry. The kids' kids.
00:14:54
Speaker 3: Yeah, they don't want to look after their grandkids. They've got plans.
00:14:57
Speaker 2: They're going away for the weekend.
00:14:59
Speaker 3: Really?
00:14:59
Speaker 2: And then I've had many friends in a moment of frustration vent that their parents aren't available this weekend.
00:15:08
Speaker 3: And they're really annoyed about it.
00:15:09
Speaker 2: Yes.
00:15:11
Speaker 3: Yes. Fair enough. Takes a village and all that.
00:15:15
Speaker 4: So particularly on Peter's side of the family, that is unheard of for us. Like Peter's mum and his dad, Brian always a bit reluctant, but always.
00:15:30
Speaker 3: Like, why is this house so full of kids? He just wanted to sit quietly in front of it. It's a good question. Yeah, in front of the horse races, the cricket or the footy, whatever was on.
00:15:38
Speaker 4: Mm-hmm. But Marie Lewis, there is no way. She never said no. She still doesn't say no.
00:15:44
Speaker 3: I don't think. Yeah. Lenny doesn't say no. No.
00:15:48
Speaker 2: Gail doesn't say no.
00:15:49
Speaker 3: Mother-in-law.
00:15:49
Speaker 5: Yeah.
00:15:50
Speaker 3: They don't say no. Love it. No. Why are we talking about this?
00:15:53
Speaker 2: If you're a buckhead and you don't have that, we applaud you in November.
00:15:57
Speaker 3: We sure do. We sure give you a buck. Oh, my goodness. Because you know what?
00:16:02
Speaker 4: And particularly when the kids are a certain age, you can't even look forward to.
00:16:06
Speaker 3: The school holidays.
00:16:07
Speaker 2: Because then they're there.
00:16:07
Speaker 3: Because they're just like endless days. Always there. But then other people will say. You're still here. Don't wish the days away. The best days.
00:16:16
Speaker 2: Of your life.
00:16:18
Speaker 3: Those people. They are. You know what? You cannot win. You cannot win. You cannot win.
00:16:26
Speaker 4: You have some days that are eye-wateringly, back-achingly long.
00:16:32
Speaker 2: I call them a record day.
00:16:35
Speaker 4: I'm not surprised. And then you'll have people who are like best days of your life. Yes.
00:16:42
Speaker 3: Make up your mind, Satan.
00:16:43
Speaker 2: It's the classic argument I would say to my parents. I didn't ask to be born.
00:16:49
Speaker 3: Did you say that? All the time. Really? Yes.
00:16:52
Speaker 2: I was the good arguer out of the four of us.
00:16:54
Speaker 3: I know you talk about how horrible you were.
00:16:58
Speaker 2: I've come good.
00:16:58
Speaker 3: I've come good. As a teenager. I've come good.
00:17:01
Speaker 2: I was not good.
00:17:03
Speaker 3: Yeah, I know you say that. What were you like, Sash?
00:17:06
Speaker 2: I wasn't good.
00:17:08
Speaker 3: I was sneaky. So good to their face. Yeah, right. That's right. That's normal.
00:17:14
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:17:14
Speaker 3: That's a right of passage. I was just very angry. Were you?
00:17:18
Speaker 2: I had a lot of internal things happening, didn't I?
00:17:20
Speaker 3: What might they have been?
00:17:22
Speaker 4: I couldn't imagine one. I couldn't imagine one.
00:17:25
Speaker 2: Complicated little boy.
00:17:26
Speaker 3: Yes. When did you know again? I don't know. I don't know. Very confused. But you knew. Probably like.
00:17:33
Speaker 4: 12?
00:17:33
Speaker 2: No, I reckon confused to about 18.
00:17:36
Speaker 4: Yeah.
00:17:37
Speaker 3: Oh, you didn't even know when you were 18.
00:17:39
Speaker 2: No, I knew, but I was still confused. As in, is it this?
00:17:44
Speaker 3: Is it that? Right. Is it everyone? Yeah, okay. Not I'm this. Yeah, okay. I understand that.
00:17:49
Speaker 2: So I reckon like 18, 19 and then came out at 21.
00:17:51
Speaker 4: It's funny, I'm amazed by people who have certainty. You know, sometimes you used to see them on the news. Some kid that knows that they want to sail around the world or fly a plane or some maestro. True. You see some six-year-old at the piano and they're playing.
00:18:09
Speaker 3: I'm just like, what is going on?
00:18:13
Speaker 4: Like, people have that certainty about what they.
00:18:18
Speaker 3: Want to do.
00:18:18
Speaker 2: I think if it was the six-year-old at the piano, they didn't choose that.
00:18:22
Speaker 3: Yeah, but you can't.
00:18:24
Speaker 4: You can break a child but you can't make a child. Like you cannot make that happen.
00:18:29
Speaker 2: That really scares me. Imagine if Cody and I ever do end up having a child and it wants to sail around the world and.
00:18:35
Speaker 3: I have to pretend to be interested. Yeah, imagine the sunblock you'd have to get.
00:18:40
Speaker 2: Track it, track it on the boat tracker.
00:18:43
Speaker 3: Good luck. And be down at the harbour. No, thank you. You know where I don't belong?
00:18:47
Speaker 4: Where?
00:18:47
Speaker 2: The harbour.
00:18:48
Speaker 3: No, but you can't. This is the thing about a kid.
00:18:51
Speaker 4: I've watched them cricket. I've watched football. I have been to dance concerts.
00:18:59
Speaker 3: I don't mind that.
00:19:00
Speaker 4: No, no, but you just don't know where you're going to be called.
00:19:04
Speaker 2: My niece, hello, Josephine, she's getting into musicals and dancing and wants to be an actress and I am so.
00:19:12
Speaker 5: Happy.
00:19:13
Speaker 2: Thank you.
00:19:14
Speaker 3: You can't play favourites. Well, do you always go to football?
00:19:18
Speaker 2: I don't go to anything because Josephine lives in another country.
00:19:21
Speaker 3: Okay, yeah. Can't you say Holland?
00:19:24
Speaker 2: They've just moved. Now they live in New York.
00:19:26
Speaker 3:
Okay. So you can say New York. Nikolai.
00:19:28
Speaker 2: Josephine.
00:19:28
Speaker 3: Hello. Is Nikolai still modelling?
00:19:31
Speaker 5: Yes.
00:19:31
Speaker 3: And very good at soccer. Okay.
00:19:33
Speaker 2: And a huge Buckhead. And they're coming to visit over Christmas. And if the timing can work, he wants to come to the Buckhead studio.
00:19:40
Speaker 3: Have those children got a Dutch accent?
00:19:43
Speaker 2: They have a, I would classify it as a world accent.
00:19:49
Speaker 3: It's very lovely.
00:19:50
Speaker 2: We'll get Nico to send a voice note.
00:19:55
Speaker 3: Merch.
00:19:55
Speaker 4: Merch.
00:19:56
Speaker 3: Yes, please. Jessica. Feedback.
00:20:00
Speaker 2: That was so aggressive. Yeah, we've got to do merch. We keep saying it.
00:20:03
Speaker 3: Merch. Yes, please. Yes, okay.
00:20:05
Speaker 2: All right, we'll do it.
00:20:06
Speaker 3: Slogans.
00:20:08
Speaker 1: Oh, yep.
00:20:09
Speaker 3: Cooker. Mm-hmm.
00:20:11
Speaker 1: Cooker.
00:20:11
Speaker 3: I think it's beautiful. Cooker on a tea towel. Just Cooker.
00:20:14
Speaker 4: Yeah.
00:20:14
Speaker 2: Oh, speaking of I think it's beautiful, play us this.
00:20:17
Speaker 3: I think it's beautiful. Okay, we need to.
00:20:20
Speaker 2: Speak about something.
00:20:21
Speaker 3: Okay.
00:20:22
Speaker 2: That's very exciting.
00:20:23
Speaker 3: The Dabbler. Remember, I'm moving on for something else now. Oh, don't you want to hear Jessica's other merch ideas? Quick, quick. It's a night record. Yep. I'm unmedicated. Okay. Buccaneer.
00:20:35
Speaker 2: What could we put I'm unmedicated on on merch?
00:20:37
Speaker 3: Like a pill?
00:20:38
Speaker 2: Holder.
00:20:39
Speaker 3: A T-shirt. Oh, okay, yep. You're shooting me down again. No, no. What about a sticker that people can put on their foreheads?
00:20:50
Speaker 2: I'm getting a T-shirt called Team Einstein.
00:20:52
Speaker 4: Let's just go all out and do mental merch.
00:20:56
Speaker 3: Mental merch. A sticker that you can put on your forehead that says I'm unmedicated. You know what?
00:21:01
Speaker 4: You'd never have trouble getting a seat on a train. People would just clear the way.
00:21:07
Speaker 3: For you, wouldn't they?
00:21:08
Speaker 1: Catch the train.
00:21:09
Speaker 3: All you've got to do is get on the train.
00:21:11
Speaker 4: Oh, yes.
00:21:11
Speaker 3: Sorry about that.
00:21:12
Speaker 1: Okay.
00:21:13
Speaker 2: Can we believe? Buckets that have been with us for a while. Yes. Understand that there was a period of your life. Yeah. When Meghan Markle.
00:21:22
Speaker 3: Oh, my goodness. I love her.
00:21:23
Speaker 1: Was.
00:21:23
Speaker 4: Hmm.
00:21:25
Speaker 3: Was just everything to you? Everything. She still is.
00:21:28
Speaker 2: We almost got into like arguments about you were.
00:21:31
Speaker 3: Talking about her too much. Yes, you tried to shut me down.
00:21:35
Speaker 2: Because you'd come into the studio and go this and she said this and she
did this. Yeah, cool, but every week.
00:21:40
Speaker 3: Yeah, it was too much for you.
00:21:42
Speaker 2: So I had to back off.
00:21:43
Speaker 4: But inwardly, I have never backed off.
00:21:48
Speaker 2: And I say this often.
00:21:48
Speaker 3: Megan is living in my heart.
00:21:51
Speaker 2: I say this sometimes to Cody.
00:21:52
Speaker 3: You ready? Where she is growing and flourishing.
00:21:55
Speaker 2: The world is small.
00:21:57
Speaker 3: Where's my little hat? The world is small. You can never forget the world is small. Put your small hat on.
00:22:02
Speaker 4: I doffs me little hat to Meghan Markle and your renewed interest in her.
00:22:08
Speaker 2: Small hat, small world.
00:22:10
Speaker 1: Oh.
00:22:10
Speaker 2: Right?
00:22:12
Speaker 3: Big hat, no cattle. Buckhead, friend of the pod.
00:22:16
Speaker 2: Poe has announced. She will be co-hosting MasterChef Kids with Megan Markle.
00:22:26
Speaker 4: Woo!
00:22:27
Speaker 3: Okay.
00:22:28
Speaker 2: This pod is now officially one degree away from Megan.
00:22:34
Speaker 3: Yes. One degree. And I always knew.
00:22:36
Speaker 2: It would happen.
00:22:38
Speaker 3: I always knew that she was in my future. Really? I'm going to mention that when I meet her.
00:22:43
Speaker 4: Mm-hmm.
00:22:45
Speaker 3: Oh, actually, I probably shouldn't. That I mailed her a book and she never replied.
00:22:48
Speaker 2: You did do that. I mailed her a book. Maybe that's like she never replied. Second chat.
00:22:52
Speaker 3: Second chat. Second chat. By the way.
00:22:56
Speaker 2: And also, they film MasterChef.
00:22:58
Speaker 3: In Melbourne.
00:22:59
Speaker 4: Right.
00:22:59
Speaker 2: We are Melbournians where they do the Easter show in Ascot Vale.
00:23:03
Speaker 3: Yeah, right.
00:23:04
Speaker 2: Like down here with the Flemington.
00:23:05
Speaker 3: At the showgrounds.
00:23:05
Speaker 4: Right.
00:23:06
Speaker 3: We call them.
00:23:06
Speaker 2: That's where MasterChef is. And so that's the suburb over from me.
00:23:10
Speaker 3: And it's just very funny that... She's going to be so close. How long is she here for? Around the corner. Two weeks?
00:23:17
Speaker 2: I'm going to weasel my way in. I'm getting there somehow. Okay. I've already told Poe. She's like, yeah, let's make it happen.
00:23:23
Speaker 3: It's going to happen.
00:23:24
Speaker 2: Okay.
00:23:24
Speaker 3: We have to make it happen. Also, don't forget this.
00:23:28
Speaker 4: You know those guys that did that experiment and you can walk in anywhere in the world carrying a ladder?
00:23:35
Speaker 2: Okay. That's right. Or the movie Wedding Crashers. Just put a suit on.
00:23:41
Speaker 3: There you go. Anywhere in the world carrying a ladder. I'll come with you.
00:23:46
Speaker 2: Do you reckon you and I trying to act casual holding a ladder, I think would look more obvious holding a ladder.
00:23:56
Speaker 3: I think it would be weird. Also, do you know what?
00:23:59
Speaker 4: And I'm just going to say this. Now, there's no insult implicit in this. I would look more natural carrying a ladder than you would.
00:24:11
Speaker 3: That's true.
00:24:12
Speaker 2: I had my doubts at 18. Who'd be at the front? At 18 years old, I thought, I'm never going to carry a ladder.
00:24:18
Speaker 3: Yeah, right. Did you?
00:24:19
Speaker 2: That's how it works.
00:24:20
Speaker 3: Shaping your future. Shaping the future. Okay. Here's how we're going to get in. Who'd be at the front? Oh, good question. Also, I think I should be at the front. I'll tell you why.
00:24:29
Speaker 4: In this DEI world, if I were, God forbid, questioned, I would automatically revert to the fact that I'm being questioned because I'm a woman.
00:24:40
Speaker 3: Carrying a ladder.
00:24:42
Speaker 4: Now, you would have recourse to the same, except it would mean explaining a lot about your life.
00:24:51
Speaker 3: I'm really sorry. Okay, proceed.
00:24:54
Speaker 4: Anyway, she's close to us and we will have her.
00:24:57
Speaker 2: And we're going to buck up Poe. We're going to big up Poe. He's my next hot take.
00:25:01
Speaker 3: Okay.
00:25:02
Speaker 2: I'm kind of feeling, tell me if you agree, there's almost like a, Round two for Megan. She's almost getting a bit of things are coming round. One million percent. I feel like people are looking at her a bit different now.
00:25:16
Speaker 1: Yes.
00:25:16
Speaker 2: And guess who has a lot to do with that?
00:25:18
Speaker 3: Us. Poe.
00:25:20
Speaker 2: Because that episode of MasterChef, I was like, you're making her laugh, you're making her smile.
00:25:25
Speaker 3: It was this vibe.
00:25:26
Speaker 2: There was chemistry.
00:25:27
Speaker 5: And us.
00:25:28
Speaker 4: Us.
00:25:28
Speaker 1: And us.
00:25:29
Speaker 5: Us.
00:25:30
Speaker 3: You're welcome, everyone. I mean, we're on the same team as Poe. Yeah, of course. I'm happy, but yes. You know what that's a lesson in?
00:25:37
Speaker 4: I think.
00:25:40
Speaker 3: Burt Newton said it once.
00:25:41
Speaker 1: Oh, yeah?
00:25:41
Speaker 3: What did he say?
00:25:42
Speaker 4: That if you keep going, you enter through the phase where you're persona non grata or you're.
00:25:48
Speaker 3: Not cool or whatever your.
00:25:50
Speaker 4: Thing is when you're seen as slightly discarded by the world and regarded with some disdain, whatever it may be. If you keep going, you will enter as he has legendary status.
00:26:04
Speaker 3: Hang in there, Buckets. And you know why?
00:26:06
Speaker 4: It's because most people in the world, when they encounter the slings and arrows of the world, it's horrible.
00:26:14
Speaker 3: So most people drop off.
00:26:16
Speaker 4: Wow.
00:26:16
Speaker 3: But she's got sticking power.
00:26:19
Speaker 2: You know what you need?
00:26:19
Speaker 1: What?
00:26:20
Speaker 2: You need a kid to get on the show and cook.
00:26:22
Speaker 3: Oh, my goodness. Your kids are too old.
00:26:24
Speaker 5: Goodness.
00:26:25
Speaker
2: What's the age?
00:26:26
Speaker 3: What's the cut off?
00:26:26
Speaker 2: We could put you in.
00:26:28
Speaker 3: Honestly, we could put you in.
00:26:30
Speaker 2: Just pump some more Botox in and away we go.
00:26:32
Speaker 3: Hello, Mr.
00:26:33
Speaker 2: Hello, Mrs.
00:26:33
Speaker 3: Megan. What's your specialty?
00:26:35
Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't know.
00:26:36
Speaker 3: What would it be? What would it be? What do kids cook? And you've got a very high voice.
00:26:39
Speaker 2: No, I don't.
00:26:40
Speaker 3: Do I? Yeah, you do. That's why you could play a kid in the animation.
00:26:46
Speaker 4: Oh, yeah. Yeah.
00:26:47
Speaker 3: The animation's very good.
00:26:48
Speaker 2: I'm eight in it.
00:26:50
Speaker 3: They're kids.
00:26:51
Speaker 4: Hmm?
00:26:56
Speaker 2: Kylie has messaged. Buckhead Kylie.
00:26:58
Speaker 3: Oh, what she said.
00:26:59
Speaker 2: Is the person messaged at the top or the bottom?
00:27:01
Speaker 4: Top.
00:27:02
Speaker 2: Oh, good. Kylie. This is great. Remember how Cody went to Brisbane and met my dream doctor, a hypochondriac doctor?
00:27:11
Speaker 3: Yes. Yes.
00:27:13
Speaker 2: Cody had a headache. He made Cody have an MRI.
00:27:16
Speaker 3: Yeah, have. The dream. Yeah.
00:27:19
Speaker 2: I want that doctor.
00:27:20
Speaker 3: Kylie. Kylie. You'd be so busy with that doctor. Message.
00:27:24
Speaker 2: Nath, I too have a hypochondriac doctor. You'd love her. Even the mildest ailment. And she's sending me off for scans and bloods.
00:27:33
Speaker 4: Really?
00:27:34
Speaker 3: This is what I want. Do people love that?
00:27:36
Speaker 2: Rarely ever finds anything and generally makes me paranoid as fuck.
00:27:40
Speaker 3: Yeah, right. Yes.
00:27:42
Speaker 2: But you can't say she isn't thorough. And then something about being diagnosed with.
00:27:47
Speaker 3: A thyroid condition. So, hey, there you go. Because of that. Yeah, it came through.
00:27:50
Speaker 4: Okay.
00:27:51
Speaker 2: And she knows the ladies at pathology really well.
00:27:54
Speaker 3: Of course she does.
00:27:54
Speaker 2: All right.
00:27:55
Speaker 3: As opposed to me.
00:27:56
Speaker 2: So they're out there.
00:27:57
Speaker 3: I've had, I've got, I think.
00:28:01
Speaker 4: In my wallet, well, there were more in the wallet that got stolen out of my car the last time. Prescriptions I've never filled and recommendations to have x-rays I've never done. Okay.
00:28:10
Speaker 3: Yeah.
00:28:11
Speaker 2: Yeah. I often do think when they're handing me a piece of paper for step two, that step two is not happening.
00:28:19
Speaker 3: Yeah, okay, good. Because I believe I'm normal. Sash is very onto her health. Yeah. CEO of my own health. Yeah.
00:28:27
Speaker 2: CEO of my own health.
00:28:28
Speaker 4: Which I taught her that I heard at a health retreat.
00:28:34
Speaker 2: It's up there with one of the worst things I've ever heard.
00:28:36
Speaker 3: We love it. It's really good. It's terrible, I know, but really good.
00:28:42
Speaker 2: It's making me feel physically uncomfortable.
00:28:43
Speaker 3: But you're the CEO of your own health.
00:28:44
Speaker 2: I am the CEO of my own health.
00:28:46
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:28:46
Speaker 2: But I do struggle with the step two sometimes. That piece of paper, I lose it. You know, I often have to call the reception and go, what happened with the, do you have it? Do I have it?
00:28:55
Speaker 3: A bit of that.
00:28:57
Speaker 2: But you're going to love this, Kate.
00:28:58
Speaker 3: Okay. Speaking of the doctor.
00:28:59
Speaker 2: Yeah.
00:29:00
Speaker 3: Yeah.
00:29:01
Speaker 2: Thought of you straight away. Oh, look.
00:29:03
Speaker 3: When he gets this look on his face, it makes me nervous. It's a good thing. No, no, no, no, no. I love it.
00:29:07
Speaker 2: I love it.
00:29:07
Speaker 3: It's going to bond us. Okay. But finally, as you would say, how do you say it again? Year to year. Year to year.
00:29:15
Speaker 2: I saw a doctor that had a very long wait list because she's a very in-demand dermatologist.
00:29:23
Speaker 3: I'm looking at you. And what? My skin? Your skin.
00:29:26
Speaker 4: Oh, mate.
00:29:27
Speaker 3: Jo, I think it's already.
00:29:28
Speaker 1: It was so.
00:29:29
Speaker 3: What did she do to you? One of those lasers.
00:29:32
Speaker 1: Oh.
00:29:32
Speaker 3: A dink laser. That's expensive. But not the Fraxel?
00:29:36
Speaker 2: No, we didn't go that far. That's like, I think she said.
00:29:39
Speaker 3: But what did she even find on your face? Heaps of stuff.
00:29:42
Speaker 2: Look at all the red dots. There was a lot.
00:29:45
Speaker 3: I've got those, but I got bitten by a mozzie.
00:29:47
Speaker 2: Oh, yeah, these aren't mozzies. I've paid for these. On the long weekend. These are designer dots.
00:29:51
Speaker 3: Yeah, right. They are like freckles, like people painting freckles on.
00:29:55
Speaker 2: So it's all real for the rosacea. It's not like I'm just making it up. So we do this, we do that, we do this.
00:30:03
Speaker 3: Got a laser treatment. Did she do it herself? She did it herself.
00:30:06
Speaker 2: I had to go back another time for step two. I get another one done in like three months.
00:30:13
Speaker 3: And then we reassess. And what was it for?
00:30:15
Speaker 2: Rosacea.
00:30:16
Speaker 3: Does it do anything else? Does it do fine lines?
00:30:19
Speaker 2: I'm sure it does lots of other stuff.
00:30:20
Speaker 3: Okay, all right, all right.
00:30:21
Speaker 2: Then she says, do this, do this, do this, do this. And she's saying, you're going to have to put this cream on.
00:30:27
Speaker 4: Oh.
00:30:29
Speaker 2: But it's not over the counter, which is what I want. Thank you.
00:30:32
Speaker 3: What do you mean?
00:30:34
Speaker 2: Gives me my little slip.
00:30:35
Speaker 3: But I'm going to.
00:30:36
Speaker 2: Follow through when it's something to do with skin.
00:30:37
Speaker 3: Yeah, of course, with cream. And
with cream. And cream. A cream you want.
00:30:41
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:30:41
Speaker 2: Guess what the cream is.
00:30:43
Speaker 3: What is it? Trentonin.
00:30:44
Speaker 2: Ivermectin.
00:30:45
Speaker 4: No.
00:30:48
Speaker 3: Oh, my goodness. I am vindicated. Ivermectin is a topical thing for rosacea. Yes, thank you. I've got some in my fridge at home. When she said it, I said. I had to order it from an online vet.
00:31:03
Speaker 2: I said.
00:31:04
Speaker 3: I did. It's apple flavoured. That's, yeah. It's a sugar cube. Yeah, it's got, it comes in a syringe. You have to lick it. And because it.
00:31:15
Speaker 4: Is meant for a horse or a large animal, the syringe is not very sensitive, so it just goes from 0 to 100 and I'm always squirting green apple flavoured paste everywhere.
00:31:27
Speaker 3: I'm desperate to see what it looks like in a normal human tube.
00:31:31
Speaker 2: Well, this is for, how do you, but you're putting yours in internally.
00:31:34
Speaker 4: No, no, no, I'm putting it on my skin, but I don't like it because of the green and the apple flavouring.
00:31:39
Speaker 3: But, so I'd like.
00:31:40
Speaker 2: Well, I'll give you some.
00:31:41
Speaker 3: Yeah, give me some. Yeah, I'll give you some.
00:31:43
Speaker 2: How do you put a tube into a tube? We'll figure it out.
00:31:45
Speaker 3: We'll figure it out. Oh, do it in one of those little Mecca. You know, Mecca will give you a sample of anything.
00:31:50
Speaker 5: Okay.
00:31:50
Speaker 3: You've got these tiny little pops.
00:31:53
Speaker 2: But to really only do when I'm going through it.
00:31:56
Speaker 3: How do you know?
00:31:57
Speaker 2: Well, I go red.
00:31:58
Speaker 3: I flush. It's all there. Right, and then it stays red. It looks like I'm wearing a Zorro mask.
00:32:03
Speaker 2: Like a Zorro mask of redness, you know.
00:32:06
Speaker 4: In fact, you're wearing a Zorro mask of whiteness. Is it not the area around the mask that's red?
00:32:11
Speaker 2: Oh, okay.
00:32:11
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm confused. That bit's white?
00:32:14
Speaker 2: No, think of the Batman mask, but instead of the black bit, it's all the red bit. The black bits are the red bits on the Batman mask.
00:32:23
Speaker 3: Oh, yeah, the black bits are the red bits. Okay. But there you go, Kate. Oh, Vanessa.
00:32:31
Speaker 2: It's a near Christmas miracle.
00:32:34
Speaker 3: I don't think, by the way.
00:32:36
Speaker 4: Mm-hmm. That I have got what I should have gotten from this. The way that you sold that to me.
00:32:46
Speaker 3: Which I love. I love it all. From a professional doctor? I love it all.
00:32:51
Speaker 2: Who I'll never tell you how much it was to see her because hashtag dink.
00:32:56
Speaker 3: Yeah.
00:32:57
Speaker 4: But I don't think, I think you're going, and you're going to love this, we're going to bond over it. What it should be is I have to apologise to you in every language I know.
00:33:08
Speaker 3: Because I have mocked you. I haven't
mocked you. Yeah, you have. I haven't mocked you. Yeah, you have. The dabbler has. The dabbler has. I know you've gone home and talked about it.
00:33:16
Speaker 2: You literally speak to Cody about it when you're with him.
00:33:19
Speaker 3: Yeah, no, no, I know, but.
00:33:21
Speaker 2: You sit there having your durries.
00:33:22
Speaker 3: What did he say?
00:33:23
Speaker 4: What did he say about the Ivermectin?
00:33:27
Speaker 3: Well, yes. You know what we're talking about medically?
00:33:31
Speaker 2: But it's no secret.
00:33:33
Speaker 3: No, no, but still. That's just all the... Remember that.
00:33:37
Speaker 4: In this country, doctors were struck off in the dark times for prescribing ivermectin.
00:33:47
Speaker 3: Just remember that.
00:33:48
Speaker 2: For COVID, not for the gay guy with red cheeks.
00:33:52
Speaker 3: But now it's accepted. Bit of a difference. But now it's also accepted as a treatment protocol for COVID.
00:33:58
Speaker 4: Good.
00:33:58
Speaker 3: And other RNA infections.
00:33:59
Speaker 2: Because time has passed and research has happened and we love.
00:34:03
Speaker 3: But the research had happened before. Big pharma. Anyway, as you know, I also love them. I hate them and I love them.
00:34:11
Speaker 2: The love-hate relationship.
00:34:12
Speaker 3: Yeah, why not?
00:34:13
Speaker 4: Why would you just wholesale swallow something about someone and not approach it critically?
00:34:22
Speaker 3: I've got to tell you something incredible about a drug.
00:34:26
Speaker 4: Okay. So, you know, I don't know if you ever saw it. You wouldn't have seen it, I don't think. I think I got it in my... Health newsletters. You know, I get a lot of them in my 80,000 unread emails. Anyway, there's a woman in, she was a black woman in America and I think A lot of the blood tests that they do are all based on her plasma from the 1950s or whatever.
00:34:53
Speaker 2: We know this.
00:34:53
Speaker 3: Henrietta Hatch. Thank you. Thank you.
00:34:56
Speaker 2: Oprah made a movie about her.
00:34:57
Speaker 3: Oh, there you go. That's why you'd know it.
00:34:59
Speaker 2: Box office bomb.
00:35:00
Speaker 5: Of course.
00:35:01
Speaker 2: The book apparently is amazing.
00:35:02
Speaker 1: Yeah.
00:35:03
Speaker 3: Anyway, so incredible. So I didn't realise. So the world knows about her. It was for blood tests, wasn't it? Genetic testing. Yeah, genetic testing. DNA stuff.
00:35:12
Speaker 4: And her family only found out by accident that they're using her.
00:35:16
Speaker 3: She's been used forever. Forever. Okay, so it's not just her.
00:35:21
Speaker 4: Across all these fields of medicine, there are people who have been responsible for this, right?
00:35:30
Speaker 3: For breakthroughs or.
00:35:32
Speaker 2: And they're not paid?
00:35:34
Speaker 3: No, they're not paid. They're not paid. I think it just is.
00:35:39
Speaker 4: Maybe the family finds out, they track it down and then they get reparations.
00:35:42
Speaker 2: I always find this stuff weird because no matter what the... Appointment is, if they ever say, and can we take these photos for before shots, it is a hard no from me. Correct. Correct. I will never be a before shot.
00:35:53
Speaker 3: No. Not even if everything about you is obscured.
00:35:58
Speaker 2: Yeah.
00:35:58
Speaker 3: What about this guy, though? What about this guy?
00:36:05
Speaker 4: They pulled a bacterium out of a German soldier's poopsie.
00:36:12
Speaker 3: In 19... Uh-huh. Okay. So that was wartime. Who did it? Well, I'll tell you. I'll tell you who did it.
00:36:22
Speaker 2: They just came across it somewhere.
00:36:24
Speaker 3: Okay.
00:36:24
Speaker 5: No.
00:36:25
Speaker 2: No.
00:36:26
Speaker 4: What they noticed was the soldier was the only man in his trench.
00:36:32
Speaker 3: Now trench, the worst. Nothing that rhymes with.
00:36:36
Speaker 2: It is good.
00:36:36
Speaker 3: Not for me. Not for me.
00:36:38
Speaker 2: You'll never see me with a ladder. You'll never see me at the harbour. And you'll never see me in a trench.
00:36:43
Speaker 3: Well, God forbid. God forbid. He didn't want to.
00:36:45
Speaker 2: Right, this bloody country's going.
00:36:47
Speaker 3: Who knows?
00:36:47
Speaker 4: Even though he was a kraut, he didn't necessarily want it. But that's where he ended up, right? So he was the only man in his trench not getting dysentery.
00:37:00
Speaker 3: And one of the doctors noticed.
00:37:01
Speaker 4: So every single man in the trenches, which was hundreds and hundreds of them, Had dysentery, which was just, you know, I think you can't hang on to anything.
00:37:13
Speaker 3: So he cultured.
00:37:16
Speaker 2: This guy.
00:37:17
Speaker 3: Yeah. Little scoop. And guess what?
00:37:21
Speaker 4: The culture, every capsule sold since of this drug has.
00:37:27
Speaker 3: Come from that one guy, from Hitler, Schittler. Every single one.
00:37:33
Speaker 2: Of this, and what it is- Is it one of those expensive ones in the fridge.
00:37:36
Speaker 3: With the chemist? I don't know what it is. It's called Mutaflor, and it's capsules for people. It's got E. coli in it, which we know, but it's maintaining.
00:37:49
Speaker 4: Remission of ulcerative colitis with a certain probiotic Since 1917.
00:37:55
Speaker 3: So it's probiotic. It's a probiotic, but it's a specific one.
00:37:59
Speaker 2: We have to thank a German soldier for a probiotic.
00:38:03
Speaker 3: Dankeschön. That I take after I do my antibiotics.
00:38:06
Speaker 4: Correct. And when you go, oh, I'm feeling a bit ulcerative in my colitis.
00:38:10
Speaker 2: It just feels a bit better when they get it from the fridge.
00:38:13
Speaker 4: Yes.
00:38:14
Speaker 3: I want one from the fridge. That guy, how incredible is that?
00:38:19
Speaker 2: Has he ever been paid? Has his family ever been paid?
00:38:21
Speaker 3: Look, who knows what happened to him? Because he was German. And as we know, he was on the wrong side of
history. So we don't know what happened to him. We don't know. But do you know what? He left a.
00:38:37
Speaker 2: Very beautiful contribution to the world.
00:38:40
Speaker 3: Well, yeah. And which a doctor noticed.
00:38:43
Speaker 2: And what time of the night are you reading this? Just in bed, scrolling?
00:38:47
Speaker 3: Okay, that's a good question. That could pop up at any time. Right, okay, okay. Because I follow a lot of health people. Yes.
00:38:59
Speaker 2: They're at least that.
00:39:00
Speaker 3: Yes.
00:39:00
Speaker 4: And some of them are quite obscure. Some of it I cannot understand. But that I understand.
00:39:07
Speaker 3: Hitler Schittler. Yeah. What an amazing guy. If only he knew how proud his family would be.
00:39:15
Speaker 2: Oh, we've gone to Hitler now.
00:39:16
Speaker 3: Oh, okay. Well, he worked for Hitler. Yeah, okay. Who do you think he was in the trenches for? I know that was pre-Hitler. How about instead of reading this, you read a history book? It's pre-Hitler. Who was he there for? I'm going to say a Prussian. A Prussian. I don't know what it means.
00:39:36
Speaker 2: Who cares?
00:39:37
Speaker 3: We're not one for. But just unbelievable. This isn't a history podcast. No, that's right. We're not nerds. That's right. No one's here to learn. It's really stunning.
00:39:52
Speaker 4: Hey, by the way, you know last week when we were recording the Melbourne Cup?
00:39:58
Speaker 3: Oh, yes. A day.
00:39:59
Speaker 2: The nup to the cup, yep.
00:40:01
Speaker 3: Yep, to the cup. You won money, but don't tell anyone.
00:40:05
Speaker 4: I won.
00:40:06
Speaker 3: I just put on a random bet. Had to go.
00:40:10
Speaker 4: We were down in the country, so I had to go to the nearest local pub. It was like 40 minutes away.
00:40:16
Speaker 3: I had a win. Had a collect.
00:40:18
Speaker 2: Guys, late in the year message, gambling wins. Gambling pays off. Did you hear that, Luke Bateman? What do you really stand to lose?
00:40:27
Speaker 3: Nothing. She came out on top. She came out on top. I'm just saying. I mean, gambling's only bad if you're unlucky.
00:40:35
Speaker 2: So I had a TV aha moment.
00:40:37
Speaker 3: Did you?
00:40:37
Speaker 2: A few days ago. The lights just flickered.
00:40:39
Speaker 4: Yeah.
00:40:39
Speaker 3: What does that mean?
00:40:40
Speaker 2: You know one of my favourite TV shows of the year?
00:40:42
Speaker 3: Traders, of course. Oh, my goodness. I've watched it for the first time. The English one. The latest? I don't know because it was in.
00:40:49
Speaker 2: Famous people or regular people? The Traders UK has a celebrity version and a.
00:40:56
Speaker 3: Regular person version.
00:40:56
Speaker 4: Oh, right.
00:40:57
Speaker 3: I'm going to say, oh, no, because James Blunt is in it.
00:41:01
Speaker 4: Yeah.
00:41:01
Speaker 2: So you're watching the latest celeb.
00:41:03
Speaker 4: But the reason that I paused is because, you know, England's got so many celebrities that we don't know.
00:41:09
Speaker 3: A bunch, but we do. I don't know a lot of them.
00:41:12
Speaker 2: Yeah, okay.
00:41:13
Speaker 3: I didn't know a lot.
00:41:13
Speaker 2: I had my moment where.
00:41:14
Speaker 1: Okay.
00:41:15
Speaker 3: It's a great show.
00:41:16
Speaker 2: It's a great show, but it's, when something is from England, when something is from that part of the world. TV show, movie, I always enjoy it more.
00:41:27
Speaker 3: And I was trying to figure out why.
00:41:28
Speaker 2: Do you know what I'm saying?
00:41:30
Speaker 3: I know exactly what you're saying.
00:41:31
Speaker 2: I'm always more emotionally connected.
00:41:33
Speaker 3: Is it just that the quality of it is better?
00:41:36
Speaker 2: No, I figured out what it is.
00:41:37
Speaker 3: Because there's a bigger population. Are you ready? Okay.
00:41:40
Speaker 2: People who are in shows aren't very attractive.
00:41:45
Speaker 4: Oh, yes.
00:41:45
Speaker 3: And because they're not attractive.
00:41:47
Speaker 4: Yes.
00:41:47
Speaker 3: I believe them.
00:41:49
Speaker 2: Yes.
00:41:50
Speaker 3: I believe the story. Yes, yes, yes.
00:41:52
Speaker 2: That person looks like a cop.
00:41:54
Speaker 1: Yes.
00:41:54
Speaker 3: That woman looks like a teacher. Yes, yes.
00:41:56
Speaker 2: That man looks the way he's supposed to look if he had that job because he's got awful teeth.
00:42:01
Speaker 4: Yeah.
00:42:01
Speaker 2: He hasn't seen the sun in ever.
00:42:03
Speaker 4: That 65-year-old woman looks like a 65-year-old woman.
00:42:07
Speaker 2: And because of them, I love it. I'm involved.
00:42:10
Speaker 3: Yes, so true. I'm invested. I believe it. But I think that. Traitors look like that. They're very good looking.
00:42:16
Speaker 2: There's a lot that aren't.
00:42:17
Speaker 3: Are there? I was watching that.
00:42:19
Speaker 2: No, no. A bunch of those celebs, I was thinking, you're not aesthetically hot, but you're so incredible at your job because you just look normal.
00:42:28
Speaker 3: Do you know who I'm loving? Who we had talked about.
00:42:31
Speaker 1: Blunt.
00:42:31
Speaker 4: Yes.
00:42:32
Speaker 3: Goodbye, my lover. Goodbye, my friend.
00:42:34
Speaker 2: Goodbye, my friend.
00:42:35
Speaker 3: You have been the one. You have been the one. You have been the one for me.
00:42:40
Speaker 2: You know what part of that song I really hate?
00:42:42
Speaker 3: What? So hollow.
00:42:46
Speaker 2: How did that fit?
00:42:47
Speaker 3: Do you? That's a good bit to sing along with in the car. He's doing real well on that show. He's just amazing. He's very bad at picking the traders. Anyhoo, but that's so much. Someone's written to him about us.
00:42:58
Speaker 2: Someone's written to him about us.
00:42:59
Speaker 3: I mean, written to us about him.
00:43:01
Speaker 4: Here, Kat, why you need to keep talking about James Blunt? Because on The Traitors he wears matching tracksuits with matching sweatpants.
00:43:11
Speaker 3: Oh, okay. He's
very schmicker and he looks a bit deranged, which is brilliant.
00:43:15
Speaker 2: You know what he looks like? Weirdly, he looks like an auntie.
00:43:21
Speaker 3: Yes, he does. I can't explain it. Yes, he really does. It's when your auntie turns 70, her hair. When her hormones are doing... Things, they're all over the place.
00:43:30
Speaker 2: She's on the piano singing goodbye, my lover.
00:43:33
Speaker 3: But he just looks like an auntie. Yeah, he looks like an auntie. He's got auntie energy. Yes.
00:43:37
Speaker 2: Yeah.
00:43:37
Speaker 3: He's trustworthy. Yeah. And he'd always bring a plate.
00:43:41
Speaker 2: Another dig.
00:43:42
Speaker 4: He goes into military boss mode in all the challenges and it is stunning. He has theories and all of them are spectacularly wrong. He's just, he appears to be a delightfully nice person.
00:43:56
Speaker 3: Bluntie's back. Bluntie's back.
00:43:57
Speaker 2: Bluntie's back.
00:43:59
Speaker 5: You're beautiful. You're beautiful. You're not beautiful, UK people, and that's why I love you. So my message is more average-looking people in things.
00:44:10
Speaker 3: Do you think?
00:44:11
Speaker 2: Thank you.
00:44:12
Speaker 4: They've obviously got a different beauty standard in the UK because my husband's watching, admittedly, it's sort of an older show, but it's not pre-dating TV.
00:44:24
Speaker 3: False teeth, like it's from the early 20s, and it's English, and they all have– I just watch them. I'm looking at their teeth. They're so snaggletoothed. And it's awesome. Bring it on.
00:44:37
Speaker 4: It really is, but I'm like some of them are still in the public eye, and I'm pretty sure they don't have that teeth.
00:44:43
Speaker 3: So those teeth. So even I think the English have succumbed.
00:44:47
Speaker 2: Oh, for the new teeth?
00:44:50
Speaker 3: Oh, no. I think so.
00:44:52
Speaker 4: One of them is– I don't know his name, but he's always on those panel shows.
00:44:56
Speaker 3: He's really funny. He's on Would I Lie To You? He's one of the team captains. David.
00:45:02
Speaker 2: David. He's real posh.
00:45:04
Speaker 3: They always make fun of him for being posh.
00:45:05
Speaker 2: Whatever.
00:45:07
Speaker 3: Whatever.
00:45:08
Speaker 2: You mean the host, the black hair? No, no, no.
00:45:10
Speaker 3: Not the Welsh guy. Anyway, whatever. I shouldn't even have started it. My point is more average looking people on TV, please.
00:45:17
Speaker 2: If I'm watching a period piece and she's got a bonnet on but her face is like snatched and she's got teeth that are wider than a bench and her lips are bigger than her feet, I kind of tap out a bit.
00:45:28
Speaker 4: But conversely, you know, they mustn't get the same level of hatred for being normal looking that you get on Australian television.
00:45:39
Speaker 3: This is why I'm saying it.
00:45:40
Speaker 2: This is why I'm trying to fight back because people are mean here.
00:45:44
Speaker 3: Yeah, people are mean. People are mean here. But I thought the English were mean.
00:45:48
Speaker 2: But people are mean about the way you look on stuff.
00:45:51
Speaker 3: Yeah, what do they mean about in England, your personality? But that's fine.
00:45:55
Speaker 2: Bring it on.
00:45:59
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:46:00
Speaker 2: So maybe 2027, year of the average face back on TV.
00:46:02
Speaker 3: And I also have to say I don't think most Australians are mean.
00:46:05
Speaker 2: Mm-hmm.
00:46:06
Speaker 3: Just the ones with computers.
00:46:07
Speaker 4: Yeah.
00:46:09
Speaker 2: Just the ones that comment about us on Star.
00:46:11
Speaker 3: No, our buckwheats, our buccaneers, our buckstacles. Yes, they're lovely. Our buckweevils.
00:46:16
Speaker 2: Yeah. Buckweevils?
00:46:18
Speaker 3: That one doesn't make sense. Yes, it does. A weevil that lives in buckwheat. Buckweevil, it's actually brilliant.
00:46:24
Speaker 4: It just came trippingly off the tongue as Shakespeare said.
00:46:27
Speaker 3: Are we doing a text? It's a text from mum or dad. Or dad.
00:46:31
Speaker 2: Uh-oh.
00:46:32
Speaker 3: Or dad. Oh, my goodness. What's daddy been doing?
00:46:35
Speaker 2: It can only mean one thing. Text from Giuseppe.
00:46:38
Speaker 3: A rare occasion. Oh, really? What's drawn that little rabbit out of the hole?
00:46:44
Speaker 2: I just feel that parents of a certain age will never, ever be okay with going to a vet. It's like you. The vet costs really hit a certain generation.
00:46:56
Speaker 3: Yes, right.
00:46:57
Speaker 4: But also, once you're awake to it, once you're awake to it, you realise a lot of it is unnecessary.
00:47:05
Speaker 3: And based on fear, which is... Because we love our animals. I'm with Giuseppe. I don't even know what it is.
00:47:12
Speaker 2: Two years ago, we got mum and dad a dog.
00:47:15
Speaker 3: Oh, yeah. Little Prince. Oh, Prince. I love Prince. Prince is a Prince.
00:47:19
Speaker 2: Prince is, he's a Prince.
00:47:20
Speaker 3: Who does Prince, I'm not going to say love more because with dogs.
00:47:25
Speaker 2: Well, he's got raging anxiety disorder because he's one of those small little cute, like poodle type.
00:47:30
Speaker 4: Right.
00:47:31
Speaker 2: And they've all got it. Apparently they've all got it. Like every single one of those dogs has raging anxiety.
00:47:38
Speaker 3: Anywho. Is it Cavoodle? Yes, one of them.
00:47:42
Speaker 2: A message for dog owners. Kennel coffee's going around.
00:47:47
Speaker 3: It's not good.
00:47:48
Speaker 2: It's not good.
00:47:49
Speaker 3: Dogs are getting sick. Have I told you how I treated?
00:47:51
Speaker 4: Yeah.
00:47:52
Speaker 3: Yeah. Okay.
00:47:53
Speaker 4: Yeah.
00:47:54
Speaker 2: Anyway, this is a classic. Dad's been to the vet because the dog's sick.
00:47:57
Speaker 3: It's all good now. Oh, so he went? Yeah, he took the dog to the vet.
00:48:00
Speaker 2: Did he?
00:48:00
Speaker 3: He took the dog to the vet. Was he reluctant? Well, what do you think?
00:48:03
Speaker 2: Let's read out a text from Dad.
00:48:05
Speaker 3: All right.
00:48:06
Speaker 2: I had a kidney removed and it didn't cost as much as him having a thermometer stuck up his ass last night.
00:48:14
Speaker 3: Oh, just stepping on the mud. Oh, Dad. Oh, Peppy, you know what? So true. And he's not playing fast and loose. He literally had a kidney removed.
00:48:26
Speaker 2: He is milking that kidney removal. It's been several years.
00:48:30
Speaker 3: How much did it cost for Prince? For Prince? Yeah. I didn't ask.
00:48:33
Speaker 2: Didn't you ask? But the reason why it would have cost a lot is they went to an out-of-hours vet.
00:48:39
Speaker 4: Oh, yes.
00:48:39
Speaker 3: And then overnight.
00:48:40
Speaker 2: They kept him overnight? I don't think so. But that's where they catch up.
00:48:45
Speaker 3: Yeah, right. Do they?
00:48:46
Speaker 5: Yes.
00:48:47
Speaker 2: Mate, if you're taking your.
00:48:48
Speaker 3: If you can't wait till daylight.
00:48:49
Speaker 4: Yeah.
00:48:49
Speaker 2: If you're going to an emergency vet.
00:48:52
Speaker 3: Had you been to an emergency, Becky would have. A couple of times.
00:48:54
Speaker 4: Yeah.
00:48:54
Speaker 3: What were the emergencies?
00:48:55
Speaker 2: When she ate an entire chocolate cake.
00:48:57
Speaker 3: Right. Not an emergency. Not an emergency. You know what I would have done? I had a buddy getting here removed.
00:49:04
Speaker 4: I would have got online and found some mutterfloor from that German soldier and given her a.
00:49:09
Speaker 3: Couple of capsules.
00:49:11
Speaker 2: What a beautiful mid-November buck.
00:49:13
Speaker 3: Isn't it? I needed that.
00:49:15
Speaker 2: Oh, we started.
00:49:16
Speaker 3: We almost punched on. Yeah, we nearly had chance. We nearly had. there. Now we've got hugs.
00:49:22
Speaker 2: I love you again.
00:49:23
Speaker 3: I love you. Oh, didn't you love me?
00:49:24
Speaker 2: No, there was a few minutes at the top there where it was touch and go.
00:49:27
Speaker 3: Was it? I always loved you. In my head I thought, this is the last lap. I always loved you. Even in our darkest hour. Just sparring for the fun. Yeah, why not?
00:49:37
Speaker 4: Hey, What?
00:49:38
Speaker 3: Goodbye, my lover. Goodbye, my friend.
00:49:40
Speaker 2: Goodbye, my friend.
00:49:41
Speaker 3: You have been the one. You have been the one for me. What else has he got? Beautiful.
00:49:48
Speaker 2: Oh, that is brilliant. Oh, that is sure.
00:49:52
Speaker 3: Oh, yes.
00:49:57
Speaker 4: The Buck Up podcast is hosted by me, Kate Langbrook, and him, Nath Valvo.
00:50:02
Speaker 3: It's produced by the brilliant Sasha French.
00:50:06
Speaker 4: Audio and sound by the magnificent Yak Lawrence.
00:50:12
Speaker 3: You might call him Jack. And Dom Evans. Oh, we're lucky.