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Close your eyes and imagine.
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What if the things in life that caused us the greatest pain, the things that bring us grief, are challenges.
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Challenges designed to help us grow to ultimately become what we were always meant to be.
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We feel like we've been buried, but what if, like a seed, we've been planted?
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And having been planted, we grow to become a mighty tree.
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Now, open your eyes.
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Open your eyes to this way of viewing life.
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Come with me as we explore your true, infinite, eternal nature.
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This is Grief to Growth, and I am your host, Brian Smith.
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Hi there, I'm Brian Smith.
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I want to welcome you, whether you're joining us for the first time, you've been with us for a while, to another episode of Grief to Growth.
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This show is here to help you navigate life's most difficult moments and explore the deeper questions that we all ask.
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Who are we, where do we come from, why are we here, and where are we going?
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I think today's conversation is one that may just shift your entire understanding of life, death, and what lies beyond.
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I've studied the afterlife for quite a while, and one of the things I find most compelling about afterlife studies is the near-death experience.
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And my guest, Jonathan Ashford, is someone who didn't just have a near-death experience.
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He says he actually died.
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On May 22nd, 2023, Jonathan's organs failed, his skin turned yellow, and he was clinically dead for three hours.
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But during that time, something extraordinary happened.
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He wasn't just floating above a hospital bed.
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He was immersed in what he describes as divine consciousness.
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He received teachings, he had a life review, and he was given a choice to stay or return.
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Jonathan had spent 25 years at the peak of material success, climbing the corporate ladder, living in abundance, and avoiding anything remotely spiritual.
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But after that experience, the version of him that returned was profoundly transformed.
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The man who came back was not the man who died.
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That executive, he says, is gone.
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Today, Jonathan is part of the IN's International Association of Near-Death Studies and the NDERF Research Studies in the Near-Death Experiences.
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And since August 2024, he's been helping others explore across the world, I should say, explore through speaking, private lessons, and spiritual guidance.
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He's not here to self-promote.
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In fact, he was told not to.
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He's here to serve, to share what he experienced with those who are ready to hear it.
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So in this episode, we'll explore what really happened during those three hours, what it felt like, what he learned, and all we need to know about the life we're living before we cross over.
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What's the difference between a near-death experience and actually dying?
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How does free will fit into what he was shown?
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Can intellect stand in the way of truth?
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And what happened when the heart finally takes over?
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So this isn't just a story, it's an invitation to re-examine everything.
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So stick around, and as always, the conversation afterwards continues over at my substack at grief2growth.substack.com.
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There you're going to find an article about today's episode where you can keep the dialogue going, you can ask questions, and you can interact with other listeners to the show.
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So with that, I want to welcome Jonathan Ashford.
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Thank you, Brian.
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I'm happy to be here.
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Yeah, I'm really glad to have you here.
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I understand you had a pretty...
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Well, all near-death experiences are unusual, but I think yours may have been more unusual than some others.
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I know you say that you didn't just have an NDE, that you actually died.
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So which brought on organ failure, multiple organ failure.
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And when I went to the other side, I was told that I passed, which is why I was given the choice to stay there or return.
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When I did return, my body was 94 degrees.
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I had lost one degree of temperature for hour that I was gone, which I understand from a hospice nurse I had recently given guidance to that that's normal.
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It's normal past death to lose that body temperature.
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So yeah, my experience is a little bit more rare than others in a way.
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I like to say there's a dial of near-death experiences where you start at the 12 and most go to the three or the six or the nine, but mine went fully to the 12 where I was asked what I wanted to do when it was over.
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So you were in the hospital when this happens?
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No, actually, I had been to the emergency room twice.
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I had collapsed two times over two weeks and both emergency room visits missed it.
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I was a super healthy guy, a two-hour day gym guy, and they couldn't find anything wrong.
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They found some acidity in my blood, which would have been the marker for them to find something, but they actually attributed it to my ketogenic diet at the time.
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So what turns out happened is I had a gallstone get stuck in a duct and that led to sepsis, led to the infection, which has three stages.
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The problem is when most people get a stone of any type, they feel it.
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I happen to have a DNA mutation to pain and I never felt it.
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So I just kept getting sicker and sicker and sicker until everything failed.
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The night I passed, my skin turned completely yellow.
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I had lost most of my eyesight.
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My hair was falling out.
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I had lost, I don't know, seven pounds maybe over the two weeks.
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And I thought I had picked up COVID from being in the ER.
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So I thought, wow, this is pretty serious.
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This is kicking my butt.
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And then it turns out that night I woke up and felt completely different and ended up passing.
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It took a few months for the doctors to figure out exactly what happened, but considering the damage I have, the extensive damage inside my body from that night, yeah, I died.
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Oh, wow.
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So how were you, how were you just, we're going to go to the physical, then we'll go to your, to your actual experience.
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But how was, was your body found in your house?
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Or how?
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No, no.
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So the three I, I had this experience where I made it to the bathroom and my, I was dragging my right leg down the hallway.
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I didn't, everything felt different.
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It was kind of like I was being moved to the bathroom at four 30 in the morning and I had been sleeping 18 hours a day.
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I had no idea why I had even woken up at four 30 in the morning.
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And it wasn't until I made it to the bathroom doorway that I realized, okay, I'm going to collapse again.
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And I don't know why.
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And I don't know if I'm going to be able to make it to the sink to prop myself up.
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So I kind of fell into it.
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And when I fell into it, I noticed that my hands were completely gray and all the fluid had leaked out of them.
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And I thought, wow, that's strange.
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What a weird hallucination.
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And then I looked up and I saw my face in the mirror.
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And when I saw my face in the mirror, I like to say, there's a part of you that knows when it's about to die.
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It's similar to, you could say, elderly relatives who are in the funeral home who just have this knowing when they're going to go.
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And there's something in me that clicked.
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My face had sunken in all the fluid had leaked out of my face.
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It was completely gray.
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My eyes had sunken almost to the back of my head.
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And it was that click.
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And I knew I was about to die.
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Everything had been removed from me.
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It was kind of like I was in front of all the thoughts of, oh, how's this even possible?
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Or what about my family?
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Or what about my friends?
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What about my dog?
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That was all peacefully removed from me.
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And you just kind of go through the experience of, I'll call it very graceful.
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In my case, it was very graceful.
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It was peaceful and it was beautiful.
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But there's no part of you that says, well, no, I don't want to, right?
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There's no fighting.
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It just happened.
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So in that space, I collapsed again, and I wasn't found at all.
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I woke up three hours later.
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I was a crumpled mess.
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I actually felt myself come back to my body.
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I felt the fluid start to move.
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I felt what it took to have the heartbeat one time.
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I felt my lungs inflate a little bit before I was even breathing so that I could breathe.
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They were like pancaked on my back.
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I felt my consciousness sort of grow within the body cavity and kind of take it over.
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And it wasn't until I was able to get off the floor that I realized my face had filled back in and I had taken my temperature at that point and it was 94 degrees, which is emergency hypothermia in itself.
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And my resting temperature that week was 97.1. I kept testing it, understanding why it wasn't fluctuating, considering how sick I was, which is another marker of sepsis.
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And it wasn't until all the doctor visits over the next few months that everyone was starting to put together, wow, you're really lucky to be alive.
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But I had this nagging message in the back of my head from a being that I met on the other side that said I had passed.
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Then from there, within about two or three months, synchronicities started happening, psychic messages, predictions that were coming true.
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And Dr. Jeffrey Longs, N-D-E-R-F, the research study showed up in a YouTube feed and I thought, well, we'll see.
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And I clicked and I watched his interview and I thought, well, that's just a little strange.
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He said something that really rung my bell.
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It said you don't have a life review.
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You don't review your life during hallucination.
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You don't review your life in a coma or being passed out, but you sure do review it when you've passed.
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So I submitted to his research study to be investigated and sure enough, it came back as there's a four rating and I was at the four, which is the smallest group of us who have had a very deep experience.
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And then there's the other aspect that I returned, nothing like the person who left.
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Three hours later, I was a completely different person.
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There's no explanation for it other than that experience over that three hours.
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So there were a number of things pointing to my passing and being able to intellectualize it in a sense and say, okay, yeah, it happened.
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There was an interesting thing as part of gasp or shortness of breath I had while I was sick.
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I had 911 on speed dial and I thought, okay, I kept the doors unlocked in case the ambulance need to come and get me because they had no idea what was going on with me and I just kept getting more and more sick.
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And on my return, when I stood up and my leg was working and my face had filled back in and I had some color, there was no part of me that said, oh, you just collapsed.
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You should call 911 again.
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It was like I had one leg in this world and one leg on the other side.
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And I know that to be part of the experience, to not have the trepidation, to not have the panic of something physically bad just happened, you should probably look into it.
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In fact, I just went about my day.
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I went to find my dog and when he saw me, he looked right through me.
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He didn't recognize me, so I thought that was odd.
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And then the dominoes just kept falling to add up that it was a full experience.
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Let's talk about your experience on the other side.
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You said you found yourself in the presence of divine consciousness, I believe is all you put it.
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I started my experience.
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I didn't have any spiritual beliefs.
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I was not a great guy and I used to make the joke that, well, if God existed, I'll just meet him when I'm dead.
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I mean, don't bother me.
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But I also had that fear.
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I wouldn't go to weddings and churches or funerals and churches for fear of being struck by lightning, considering the kind of lifestyle I lived.
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So I was welcomed into a light-filled landscape that looks something like the Scottish Highlands.
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It was just these rolling hills and this grass that was all the same length, no trees.
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And it was moving like it was under water.
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It was just waving and there's all this light emitting from everywhere and it was beautiful.
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It was incredible.
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And from what I understand in the studies, we're all welcomed by a view or an experience of something that does welcome us the most.
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If I had seen a church upon my passing, I would have been like, I'm in trouble.
00:14:05.579 --> 00:14:07.559
So for me, it was nature.
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I always had, no matter who I was in my material existence, I always had an affinity for nature.
00:14:14.899 --> 00:14:16.959
And that's what it kind of dropped me into.
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And from there, from what I understand with the studies, none of us know we've passed.
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I didn't.
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And it wasn't until I met a being who looked like he belonged in that place.
00:14:31.259 --> 00:14:37.899
And that being was dressed like a hiker, like somebody I would pass on a trail and just say, hello and keep going.
00:14:39.019 --> 00:14:45.899
And it wasn't until I met this hiker that I will say I made eye contact with him, but I know I didn't have a body.
00:14:46.959 --> 00:14:55.639
So it was kind of like when my attention and intention hit his, I received this immediate, I call it the three hour beach ball of conversation.
00:14:55.639 --> 00:14:57.419
It just gets put into you.
00:14:58.220 --> 00:15:10.899
This immediate telepathic communication about where I was, what had happened, you know, kind of who he was, he's there to welcome me all this, all this love that I can't quite put into human words.
00:15:10.939 --> 00:15:14.379
It's like the greatest welcome you can't give anybody here.
00:15:14.639 --> 00:15:20.139
But it was from that experience that the near death side of it happened.
00:15:21.360 --> 00:15:22.980
So tell me about what happened.
00:15:23.620 --> 00:15:23.899
Yeah.
00:15:24.079 --> 00:15:27.159
So from there, he sensed that I was trying to figure out who he was.
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And I'll just say this, you can give them any name you want.
00:15:30.500 --> 00:15:32.659
The names don't really matter over there.
00:16:39.129 --> 00:16:39.990
Like they matter here.
00:16:41.250 --> 00:16:45.950
Identification is very different from, you know, I wasn't Jonathan over there.
00:16:46.210 --> 00:16:47.850
You know, I wasn't a male or a female.
00:16:48.070 --> 00:16:51.330
I wasn't a Democrat, Republican, Christian and Jewish.
00:16:51.509 --> 00:16:52.210
I wasn't anything.
00:16:52.409 --> 00:16:59.009
I was a being experienced, experiencing the expansion into the fullness of many existences.
00:16:59.830 --> 00:17:03.330
But this being, I'll say he was 33 years old, he had brown hair and brown eyes.
00:17:04.250 --> 00:17:06.789
And it was like I could place him, but I couldn't place him.
00:17:07.029 --> 00:17:10.289
It was like remembering an old friend, but forgetting their name.
00:17:11.169 --> 00:17:17.149
And upon that, he stepped towards me, he could feel that, that wonder on me.
00:17:17.210 --> 00:17:27.329
And he started to show me a number of different existences that I had lived, as well as summing up the answer to who he was, which was I am you and you are me.
00:17:27.909 --> 00:17:31.210
And from there, it went right into the life review.
00:17:32.109 --> 00:17:38.089
Now, my life was not, I was not on the positive side of things.
00:17:38.629 --> 00:17:40.649
So it was all the nitty gritty.
00:17:41.629 --> 00:17:46.589
But that being wasn't there to judge me through it, that being was there to love me through it.
00:17:46.889 --> 00:17:52.849
And even doing the worst thing I had ever done in my existence, I was loved unconditionally through that experience.
00:17:54.569 --> 00:17:59.109
So you mentioned that you were pretty materialistic before.
00:18:00.430 --> 00:18:01.869
Was this a shock to you?
00:18:02.730 --> 00:18:03.829
How did you receive this?
00:18:04.389 --> 00:18:05.549
No, it's not a shock.
00:18:05.750 --> 00:18:06.369
You know what it is.
00:18:06.829 --> 00:18:10.690
I like to say that the intellect does die, right?
00:18:10.849 --> 00:18:15.490
The part of you that has the desire to act a certain way here does die.
00:18:15.930 --> 00:18:22.049
And you're free of that filter piece, at least in my experience, I was free of that filter piece.
00:18:22.509 --> 00:18:31.309
What do you allow me to experience my life review from more of a, for example, if you did something, you would give it the excuse.
00:18:31.549 --> 00:18:33.309
Well, I had a bad day that day, right?
00:18:33.629 --> 00:18:35.909
I was in a, I didn't sleep enough and I was grumpy.
00:18:36.490 --> 00:18:39.409
Like that, that intellectual part of you doesn't make the trip.
00:18:39.889 --> 00:18:48.569
But the part of you that does is the part that recognizes, okay, I didn't, I didn't understand my connection with another person in that conversation.
00:18:49.289 --> 00:18:50.450
I didn't show them any compassion.
00:18:50.710 --> 00:18:52.069
I didn't have love for anybody.
00:18:52.389 --> 00:18:54.549
I was selfish in that place, right?
00:18:54.769 --> 00:19:02.829
So you're feeling it for more, in my case, an observational view, but still tied very much to the being that I was.
00:19:02.950 --> 00:19:12.629
I would slip in to myself or I would slip in to somebody else in the experience and sometimes have a third, like a third party view of some of the experiences that I had.
00:19:13.490 --> 00:19:17.629
So you're really not tallying like, okay, screwed that up, screwed up, screwed up.
00:19:17.809 --> 00:19:26.789
You're just kind of, you're experiencing from a view without the lens of your human nature, which is desire for gain, right?
00:19:26.968 --> 00:19:34.329
We're always, every, every action we take is in the name of gain or comfort in some way, whether we realize it or not, and you're free of that there.
00:19:34.750 --> 00:19:42.948
So you get to the truth of why you do the things you do when you do them, but you also don't have that filter.
00:19:43.490 --> 00:19:45.009
You feel them in the full brunt.
00:19:45.188 --> 00:19:50.769
You don't have the filter that says, well, that's partly their fault too, right?
00:19:50.929 --> 00:19:53.609
You don't have that, that negotiating piece.
00:19:53.869 --> 00:19:56.309
So I loved the life review.
00:19:56.569 --> 00:19:57.829
I feel like I never left.
00:19:58.329 --> 00:19:59.909
I wish everybody could have it.
00:20:00.529 --> 00:20:04.569
It's such a tool to walk through existence, having that feeling.
00:20:05.250 --> 00:20:11.149
So it sounds like you take ownership of your part in things, but it doesn't make you feel guilty.
00:20:12.229 --> 00:20:13.349
No, there was no guilt.
00:20:13.589 --> 00:20:14.369
There was no shame.
00:20:15.149 --> 00:20:16.089
There was no judgment.
00:20:16.709 --> 00:20:21.409
If you want to use the word judgment, you could say there's judgment, but judgment's a harsh word.
00:20:21.629 --> 00:20:27.409
There's more, more, it was more along the lines of, oh, I missed that opportunity, right?
00:20:27.509 --> 00:20:29.490
You're not judging, you're condemning yourself.
00:20:29.729 --> 00:20:31.069
You're kind of like, okay, I see that.
00:20:31.209 --> 00:20:33.609
I understand there was love there and I denied it.
00:20:35.229 --> 00:20:38.969
So in that sense, it can give you great direction.
00:20:40.369 --> 00:20:41.449
It was just amazing.
00:20:41.829 --> 00:20:44.189
I could talk about it for the next three hours.
00:20:44.809 --> 00:20:45.529
Yeah, well, go ahead.
00:20:45.889 --> 00:20:46.349
Talk about it.
00:20:47.469 --> 00:20:53.589
So one of the really interesting parts is coming out of the life review is understanding how connected we all are.
00:20:54.009 --> 00:21:02.389
It was like when I was slipping into another being, experiencing what I was saying to them, it was feeling what they felt.
00:21:02.669 --> 00:21:24.750
It was feeling what I was, what venom I may have been pointing in their direction, but also having the understanding of if we felt our true connection to each other, we would not, or if we just acknowledge it, we probably wouldn't put ourselves in the position to even have an argument in the first place or say something crude in the first place.
00:21:25.889 --> 00:21:34.189
So the life review showed me how we are literally connected to all things everywhere, all at once, even things that we think aren't alive.
00:21:34.449 --> 00:21:42.189
There were scenarios where I would have an argument with somebody and I was the third person view, but I was also the pavement.
00:21:42.569 --> 00:21:44.669
I was also the paint of the parking lines.
00:21:44.769 --> 00:21:47.369
I was also the brick building we were next to, the car.
00:21:47.750 --> 00:21:48.649
I was the sky.
00:21:48.889 --> 00:21:49.629
I was the sun.
00:21:50.369 --> 00:21:52.289
And you just feel a wincing.
00:21:53.229 --> 00:22:02.309
You feel the aliveness of all things around us and you feel its witness of our existence and it kind of just winces a little bit.
00:22:03.129 --> 00:22:09.649
And when you understand that everything here is a part of your existence, there's no such thing as anything not being a part of your existence.
00:22:10.609 --> 00:22:16.789
You kind of lend yourself to open up a little bit more to, all right, it's not just about me and another person.
00:22:17.229 --> 00:22:18.349
It's about the future.
00:22:18.509 --> 00:22:19.289
It's about the past.
00:22:19.549 --> 00:22:22.909
It's about how this resonates through all existence for all time.
00:22:23.629 --> 00:22:31.869
Can we just be a little bit more conscious that when we pass, this will mean what it means right now to us in a human state.
00:22:32.309 --> 00:22:35.750
It'll mean something more for all in another state.
00:22:36.509 --> 00:22:39.949
So it's something that gives pause to existence.
00:22:40.209 --> 00:22:46.669
It just grabs you for a second before you engage in something and say, okay, what's this about and why?
00:22:46.849 --> 00:22:51.029
Why am I, why is the human part of me trying to win?
00:22:51.729 --> 00:22:58.449
Why is the human part of me trying to gain when it's a false gain rather than from the heart, which is the true gain.
00:22:59.949 --> 00:23:00.049
Wow.
00:23:00.829 --> 00:23:05.889
So, um, you said you were, you were dead out for three hours.
00:23:06.129 --> 00:23:07.049
What was the time?
00:23:07.229 --> 00:23:08.229
That's clock time here.
00:23:08.449 --> 00:23:09.569
What was the timeframe for you?
00:23:09.569 --> 00:23:10.769
Like on the other side?
00:23:11.529 --> 00:23:13.990
Oh, very, very long, very long.
00:23:14.349 --> 00:23:18.149
Um, I can't quite relate it to time so much.
00:23:18.250 --> 00:23:21.529
I didn't feel time when I left, I didn't feel time in the life review.
00:23:22.029 --> 00:23:30.649
The life review seemed instant, literally like a snap of a finger as well as drawn out for like every second of existence.
00:23:30.969 --> 00:23:47.369
So it was like this paradox of two experiences in one after the life review, I was given the choice to return or stay, but feeling that connection to all people, all things everywhere, it's kind of like you now understand how to facilitate love properly.
00:23:47.569 --> 00:23:52.129
Do you want to ignore that and stay here or do you want to go back and help do that?
00:23:52.549 --> 00:23:58.889
When I said I would go back, I had a second half of my near death experience, which is a little bit rare.
00:23:59.669 --> 00:24:10.629
And that's where I was giving all these revelations and teachings about time and consciousness and truth and perception and how we work through reality and how it affects all things everywhere.
00:24:11.029 --> 00:24:17.269
And those teachings, I'll call them teachings seem to go on forever, far more than three hours.
00:24:18.509 --> 00:24:23.949
They only stopped at a point where I call it, I received the embrace of God.
00:24:24.149 --> 00:24:33.869
If you want to use the word God is too small, it's far too small, but a light appeared and it just started to grow a different kind of light that just consumed everything.
00:24:34.469 --> 00:24:43.849
And then when I was fully integrated in that light, I was kind of dropped like a rain drop off of an edge of a tree branch down into my body.
00:24:45.049 --> 00:24:46.869
But it was far more than three hours.
00:24:47.149 --> 00:24:52.649
I don't know if I was there 3 million years, three years, far more than the time I was gone.
00:24:53.009 --> 00:24:55.229
Yeah, so time dilates on that side is where I understand.
00:24:55.869 --> 00:24:57.289
Yeah, it's like it doesn't exist.
00:24:58.269 --> 00:25:01.369
It's one of the things that's changed for me on return.
00:25:01.529 --> 00:25:04.429
Time has never been the same for me since coming back.
00:25:04.490 --> 00:25:12.750
And I don't know if it's because I experienced its flux and estate on the other side, but it doesn't register as time.
00:25:13.029 --> 00:25:16.349
It seems like everything is immediate and everything is really drawn out.
00:25:16.649 --> 00:25:18.849
So it's hard to say what time is.
00:25:19.769 --> 00:25:25.990
I like to call time nothing more than a slow motion view of what existence really is.
00:25:26.490 --> 00:25:28.049
Existence was shown to me as sparks.
00:25:29.049 --> 00:25:31.389
So as soon as it gets hot and red, it dissipates.
00:25:32.029 --> 00:25:33.569
So it literally is immediate.
00:25:33.750 --> 00:25:36.229
An entire existence is one snap of the fingers.
00:25:36.449 --> 00:25:36.949
It's immediate.
00:25:37.909 --> 00:25:42.490
But time is the slow motion view that allows us to experience it.
00:25:43.289 --> 00:25:54.129
So with that, without time, we wouldn't have the ability to build awareness of how we're living our lives, or what love feels like, or all the beauty and the richness of existence.
00:25:55.329 --> 00:25:58.649
So time does serve a purpose here, but not so much there.
00:25:59.269 --> 00:25:59.629
Yeah.
00:26:00.289 --> 00:26:03.009
So you said you received some teachings.
00:26:03.449 --> 00:26:09.569
Now I've heard, I've talked to a lot of people that have had near-death experiences and say, I got the teachings, but I wasn't really able to bring them back.
00:26:10.229 --> 00:26:11.689
Were you able to bring them back with you?
00:26:12.149 --> 00:26:15.829
Yeah, there are a couple of rare things about my experience.
00:26:16.229 --> 00:26:24.049
The first one is I could remember it when I got back, you know, for most of the studies, it takes years before, you know, I think the average is seven years.
00:26:24.429 --> 00:26:27.289
And then they kind of like, well, something, something happened.
00:26:28.549 --> 00:26:31.369
In my case, I remembered it right away immediately.
00:26:32.589 --> 00:26:35.329
The other thing is all of those teachings returned with me.
00:26:35.529 --> 00:26:36.569
I came back with them.
00:26:36.709 --> 00:26:45.990
I was given a couple of warnings about them before returning by this being, but it's, I feel like it's a part of me in a weird way.
00:26:46.129 --> 00:26:47.250
It doesn't come from memory.
00:26:47.649 --> 00:26:50.589
It's like it's baked into the DNA now, which is very strange.
00:26:51.889 --> 00:26:55.069
When I do interviews or anything like that, I don't have to think about them.
00:26:55.209 --> 00:26:56.049
They just come out.
00:26:56.309 --> 00:26:57.449
They have a life of their own.
00:26:58.709 --> 00:27:02.490
One of the things I was told, the teachings were for the one, not the 99.
00:27:03.609 --> 00:27:13.429
And I didn't understand really fully what that meant until I started giving audience talks and guidance where people would say, Oh, this is really interesting.
00:27:13.609 --> 00:27:14.129
It's really unique.
00:27:14.229 --> 00:27:15.629
There's something I picked up on that.
00:27:15.709 --> 00:27:18.329
There was that one thing you said and I get emails.
00:27:18.329 --> 00:27:20.029
There was the one thing, the one thing, the one thing.
00:27:20.029 --> 00:27:23.750
And I realized after a bit, they were hearing something I wasn't saying.
00:27:24.629 --> 00:27:26.809
So they were taking information in.
00:27:27.289 --> 00:27:28.529
It was unique to them.
00:27:28.729 --> 00:27:29.849
It was catered to them.
00:27:30.169 --> 00:27:32.269
They would, it would resonate with them.
00:27:32.309 --> 00:27:37.490
They would feel something, a shift inside, and they would move through life differently.
00:27:38.409 --> 00:27:42.449
So I figured out it was for the one because it is alive in its sense.
00:27:42.689 --> 00:27:45.809
And everybody who hears it, it's customized to them.
00:27:46.229 --> 00:27:47.429
It wasn't for the 99.
00:27:47.669 --> 00:27:50.609
Like it's not, okay, everybody, this is truth, right?
00:27:51.269 --> 00:27:54.149
It's going to be customized to the way you understand truth.
00:27:54.949 --> 00:27:56.689
So it does have a life of its own.
00:27:56.909 --> 00:27:58.929
It comes out in different ways.
00:27:59.089 --> 00:28:03.409
I record my talks just so I can go back and understand what came through oftentimes.
00:28:05.009 --> 00:28:14.449
But yeah, I just know that the reason I didn't forget it or the reason it's baked into me is because I was told on the other side, I'm supposed to share it.
00:28:14.529 --> 00:28:15.569
And that's all I'm doing.
00:28:16.029 --> 00:28:19.490
I come back and I talk and I say yes to everything and I try to provide guidance.
00:28:19.629 --> 00:28:21.250
I don't charge anybody anything.
00:28:21.929 --> 00:28:27.169
I live off donations and I'm just here to give you that information if you seek it.
00:28:27.629 --> 00:28:27.729
Hmm.
00:28:28.469 --> 00:28:33.189
So what are some of the things that you were you were told?
00:28:33.529 --> 00:28:40.229
I know this sounds like it's probably a lot, but you know, it's something I would guess some of the questions that people have like, why are we here?
00:28:40.909 --> 00:28:43.229
Is there anything that loves us or cares about us?
00:28:43.309 --> 00:28:44.189
Those types of things.
00:28:44.509 --> 00:28:55.369
Yeah, there's a I mean, having met it and having been integrated with it, there is beyond doubt that there's a benevolent force in and around you all day, every day.
00:28:56.029 --> 00:29:04.909
I like to say we're the children walking through existence, holding the hand of a parent, but we always forget we're holding that hand until we stop and go, Oh, you're still here.
00:29:06.309 --> 00:29:08.389
So yeah, there is a benevolent force around us.
00:29:08.549 --> 00:29:16.269
Our lives are you could say everybody looks for their purpose, but I like to say that on my return, there's nothing to do.
00:29:16.709 --> 00:29:17.709
There's nothing to change.
00:29:18.129 --> 00:29:19.449
And there's nothing to fix.
00:29:19.669 --> 00:29:33.389
There's only to experience your existence through a heart space for a heart centered space rather than the material view of existence, which would be through your intellect, which always, always desires more.
00:29:33.529 --> 00:29:34.389
It's insatiable.
00:29:34.829 --> 00:29:39.869
You could get all the answers of the world today through the intellect and you would still look for another answer tomorrow.
00:29:41.289 --> 00:29:47.889
So it's also understanding that our because we're so connected, our lives really aren't ours, in a sense.
00:29:48.669 --> 00:29:53.250
It's we're all here serving, we all bought the ticket to come down here.
00:29:53.789 --> 00:29:58.769
And we're all serving each other without realize without realizing we're actually serving each other.
00:29:59.549 --> 00:30:08.389
Our existences can only be rich or fulfilled through what we experience with others, whether that's at work or school or your friends.
00:30:09.409 --> 00:30:14.109
So we rely on each other to provide this golden experience.
00:30:14.269 --> 00:30:22.529
However, we're constantly trying to separate ourselves into something unique and different so that we can focus on our experience.
00:30:23.349 --> 00:30:24.809
Yeah, there's nothing wrong with that.
00:30:25.129 --> 00:30:25.849
Everybody does it.
00:30:26.009 --> 00:30:26.849
It's just on occasion.
00:30:28.149 --> 00:30:38.229
When we do encounter others that were maybe hurting or suffering or angry with us is to remember that they're just experiencing what they need to experience through us as I am through them.
00:30:39.149 --> 00:30:44.289
So purpose is kind of like it's not an individual achievement here.
00:30:44.429 --> 00:30:45.509
It's a collective movement.
00:30:46.129 --> 00:30:54.409
And the more you sit in that space, the more that benevolent force around us kind of says, okay, you don't need the heat anymore.
00:30:54.589 --> 00:30:58.229
You don't need to be pushed in a certain direction.
00:30:58.509 --> 00:31:06.409
Your free will has now aligned with what real purpose is, which is just to be aware of our existence and how it affects others.
00:31:07.809 --> 00:31:07.909
Yeah.
00:31:08.709 --> 00:31:13.869
So you, you mentioned when you got to you, I think you said you felt this great love.
00:31:14.589 --> 00:31:18.189
A lot of times people, they'll say, well, I don't want to come back.
00:31:19.149 --> 00:31:20.889
So you made the conscious decision to come back.
00:31:21.029 --> 00:31:21.329
What was it?
00:31:21.649 --> 00:31:21.849
Why?
00:31:21.990 --> 00:31:23.089
Why did you decide to come back?
00:31:23.649 --> 00:31:27.689
It was coming out of the life review, realizing what our connection was to all.
00:31:28.149 --> 00:31:35.349
And I don't know if everybody gets to experience that, but in my case, it was so deep.
00:31:36.029 --> 00:31:40.689
It was understanding my connection to eternity in a way, to all humans.
00:31:42.209 --> 00:31:52.389
There was something in my life review I was shown, you know, being a busy executive, I was the kind of guy who was just not empathetic or sympathetic to anybody ever.
00:31:52.389 --> 00:31:54.250
I just didn't care about people.
00:31:55.149 --> 00:32:07.809
And there was a circumstance where I had somebody in an office that I was managing who was just looking for a little bit of time and reassurance to know that this gentleman was not going to get fired.
00:32:08.709 --> 00:32:19.089
And instead of giving him that time, he would show up in front of my office door every morning before I was at work, just to say good morning and to let me know that he was here on time and he was going to do the work.
00:32:19.869 --> 00:32:24.169
And instead of giving him the time, I ignored him and I shunned him.
00:32:24.589 --> 00:32:29.449
And it was like, I don't have time for you and I don't have time for the weakness that you're showing me right now.
00:32:30.149 --> 00:32:34.889
Well, when I experienced that on the other side, it was more than eye opening.
00:32:35.289 --> 00:32:59.909
I would say it's soul changing to understand every time he walked away from my office and went back to his, I was shown how his mood changed, how depression set in, how other coworkers would try to cheer him up and fail, how he ended up drinking heavily even more than he had already been drinking, how it affected his son's birth, his marriage, how it was passed to his son and the behaviors that he had.
00:33:00.709 --> 00:33:05.549
I was shown the ripple of basically a stone dropping it upon and how everything ripples out.
00:33:06.429 --> 00:33:17.309
So leaving that life, I guess the life review in the situation where I felt, I just felt a oneness and a love for everybody.
00:33:17.589 --> 00:33:21.869
It just immediately, it was kind of like, well, of course I'll go back and help.
00:33:22.609 --> 00:33:26.469
I mean, existence was only shown to me as that, it's over.
00:33:27.269 --> 00:33:31.429
So from that perspective, it wasn't like, well, I'm going to come back for another 50 years.
00:33:32.109 --> 00:33:33.990
It's kind of like, I'll be back in a second.
00:33:34.509 --> 00:33:36.029
So yeah, of course I'll go help.
00:33:36.949 --> 00:33:40.269
So in my case, it was, I like to say it's a divine joke.
00:33:40.990 --> 00:33:42.750
There was, well, do you want to stay here with me?
00:33:42.809 --> 00:33:43.569
Or do you want to go back?
00:33:43.629 --> 00:33:46.769
And I'm like, well, I already feel my depth of connection with everything.
00:33:46.769 --> 00:33:48.109
Of course, I'm going to go back and help.
00:33:48.369 --> 00:33:50.529
Why would I stay, you know, I'm going to be back in a second.
00:33:51.269 --> 00:33:54.169
So yeah, that's why I chose to come back.
00:33:54.529 --> 00:33:54.729
Wow.
00:33:55.329 --> 00:33:59.729
So were you able to bring that continued sense of connection back?
00:33:59.909 --> 00:34:01.569
Or do you feel isolated?
00:34:01.889 --> 00:34:03.509
Like, like the rest of us do sometimes?
00:34:04.329 --> 00:34:05.569
Yeah, no, it's very strange.
00:34:05.829 --> 00:34:07.490
Like, for example, I hated my neighbors.
00:34:07.990 --> 00:34:09.329
I didn't like my neighbors.
00:34:09.990 --> 00:34:11.809
And within three hours, I'm back.
00:34:12.030 --> 00:34:14.789
And I remember taking my first shower and just laughing.
00:34:14.789 --> 00:34:15.869
I'm like, I can't believe it.
00:34:15.929 --> 00:34:16.530
I love my neighbors.
00:34:16.730 --> 00:34:18.289
I don't know why, but I love my neighbors.
00:34:19.070 --> 00:34:19.769
And it's strange.
00:34:19.769 --> 00:34:23.630
I just have this different view of existence now.
00:34:23.630 --> 00:34:24.690
And I love everybody.
00:34:24.949 --> 00:34:27.849
I literally across the world, I don't care what anybody has done.
00:34:28.449 --> 00:34:30.289
And I just carry that all the time.
00:34:30.670 --> 00:34:34.530
And people say, well, that must get tiring, you know, because there are all kinds of people.
00:34:34.670 --> 00:34:36.210
And I said, No, it's actually freeing.
00:34:36.750 --> 00:34:39.650
I don't have to judge anybody or where they are or what they're doing.
00:34:39.650 --> 00:34:40.829
I love everybody.
00:34:41.289 --> 00:34:44.369
So I live in this gifted space.
00:34:44.369 --> 00:34:48.429
Like for me, it's like, yes, my existence is completely different.
00:34:49.050 --> 00:34:54.449
I won't be buying boats or cars, like I won't have that part of me that didn't return.
00:34:55.090 --> 00:34:59.610
But I have this essence within me now that I just get to share with people.
00:34:59.849 --> 00:35:01.110
And it's the most amazing thing.
00:35:01.250 --> 00:35:04.650
It's so much greater than what I would call a rich human existence.
00:35:05.309 --> 00:35:05.449
Yeah.
00:35:06.090 --> 00:35:08.969
So did you quit your job when you came back?
00:35:09.590 --> 00:35:13.429
Yeah, I was a sea level executive, you know, a six figure guy.
00:35:13.570 --> 00:35:23.909
And I just literally the day that I came back within an hour, I just knew I could never be in a position to trade something for money.
00:35:24.429 --> 00:35:26.010
There was never going to be a transaction.
00:35:26.389 --> 00:35:35.570
You know, I managed large groups of people as an executive, and you're always trying to move the pieces on the board for the businesses gain on their not their gain.
00:35:36.050 --> 00:35:44.010
So there's a manipulation problem in that space where you're just constantly trying to, you know, wring blood out of a stone.
00:35:44.510 --> 00:35:46.469
And nobody's getting raises for it.
00:35:46.530 --> 00:35:48.690
They're just feeling fear of losing their job.
00:35:48.710 --> 00:35:49.550
So they do it.
00:35:50.090 --> 00:35:52.630
And I realized I could never ever do that again.
00:35:52.829 --> 00:35:58.710
I could never be in a position where I tried to manipulate somebody for my gain.
00:35:59.469 --> 00:36:01.389
It just that it ended that day.
00:36:01.429 --> 00:36:02.590
I never went back to work.
00:36:03.289 --> 00:36:06.789
I sold everything sold literally gave away.
00:36:07.210 --> 00:36:08.809
I live like a monk.
00:36:09.230 --> 00:36:09.829
Everything's gone.
00:36:11.110 --> 00:36:12.090
I live off donations.
00:36:12.289 --> 00:36:15.250
I've lived off donations for the last three years and I make enough to eat.
00:36:15.990 --> 00:36:24.969
And that's perfect because I have, I didn't return with desire that said, Oh, that pair of jeans would be good or, Oh, let's go to a restaurant.
00:36:25.610 --> 00:36:32.789
I have no desire whatsoever for food, money, sex, companionship, entertainment, nothing.
00:36:33.670 --> 00:36:36.430
So for me, having just enough to eat is perfect.
00:36:36.690 --> 00:36:38.550
It's a perfect existence for me.
00:36:39.249 --> 00:36:41.730
And that's why I give this information away.
00:36:41.890 --> 00:36:45.070
There will never be, you know, pay, pay for my course kind of thing.
00:36:45.070 --> 00:36:50.210
That's just not the spot that I'm in, but, and I don't know how long I'm here for.
00:36:50.450 --> 00:36:52.530
I, I don't imagine it's for another 50 years.
00:36:53.050 --> 00:37:02.890
So I'm just here to share the information to help as many people as I can shift their perspective and in doing so that relieve suffering.
00:37:03.849 --> 00:37:03.949
Yeah.
00:37:04.430 --> 00:37:07.289
And I know you were told not to self promote.
00:37:08.230 --> 00:37:13.769
Um, so yeah, I was given a very clear message, receive only what you are given, take nothing for yourself.
00:37:14.950 --> 00:37:17.870
And people, when people hear that, they hear it different ways.
00:37:18.349 --> 00:37:24.250
I know that receive only what you were given is basically saying you, you will be taken care of.
00:37:24.349 --> 00:37:25.110
Don't worry about it.
00:37:25.470 --> 00:37:28.230
Like you don't, I've received that message a number of times.
00:37:28.390 --> 00:37:29.289
Do not worry about money.
00:37:29.809 --> 00:37:30.170
Okay.
00:37:30.650 --> 00:37:33.610
So I go and I buy groceries and I always know there's money in there.
00:37:33.630 --> 00:37:35.470
I just trust it.
00:37:36.250 --> 00:37:40.590
Um, the second half of that is, um, take nothing for yourself.
00:37:40.809 --> 00:37:53.730
That was more for me in a sense, because if I'm taking something for myself, if I'm desiring something or I'm going after it, I'm saying that there was a yourself that I'm doing it for the fabricated self.
00:37:53.730 --> 00:37:55.990
I returned without that fabricated self.
00:37:55.990 --> 00:38:02.079
There's nothing to take for, there's nothing to do for, there's no nothing to reach for or entertain.
00:38:02.960 --> 00:38:07.000
Uh, I don't have the desires that are based on the fabricated itself.
00:38:07.059 --> 00:38:12.240
Whereas before as an executive, I have all the things I want to go and take, right?
00:38:12.360 --> 00:38:16.340
I want the good champagne, the good food, I want the good golf course, all the stuff.
00:38:16.720 --> 00:38:16.920
Right.
00:38:17.340 --> 00:38:22.099
So that message was, was very clear to me and that's why I don't charge people.
00:38:22.740 --> 00:38:30.500
The second I start trying to put myself in a position where I'm rebuilding a fabricated version of who I am.
00:38:30.740 --> 00:38:33.860
Then I'm taking things for that fabricated version.
00:38:33.880 --> 00:38:35.579
I'm no longer in the space of giving.
00:38:36.340 --> 00:38:36.440
Yeah.
00:38:36.900 --> 00:38:43.539
So this is, this is, that's the message for you is, is this something that we should all take into which we not have money.
00:38:43.539 --> 00:38:44.620
Is that a bad thing?
00:38:44.700 --> 00:38:45.559
No, no.
00:38:45.700 --> 00:38:48.400
And I have a lot of wealthy people ask me those questions.
00:38:48.400 --> 00:38:57.380
You know, I have two houses or a few boats, an airplane, and I tell everybody everything in your existence is there for a reason.
00:38:58.039 --> 00:39:00.240
It's more about the shift of perception, right?
00:39:00.340 --> 00:39:12.000
If you're a multimillionaire and you have all the things, you could say the part of you that got you all the things was this constant reach out of the, in the name of desire.
00:39:12.000 --> 00:39:12.900
I want that.
00:39:13.240 --> 00:39:14.160
I need to have that.
00:39:14.760 --> 00:39:17.599
And then the shift in perspective is, well, I have things.
00:39:17.760 --> 00:39:19.059
How do I share the things?
00:39:19.519 --> 00:39:22.440
How do I have gratitude for the things?
00:39:22.780 --> 00:39:25.340
Like I was the kind of guy that bought a boat.
00:39:25.620 --> 00:39:27.400
Then I realized one boat was enough.
00:39:27.559 --> 00:39:28.460
So I bought another boat.
00:39:28.599 --> 00:39:29.539
Then I have two boats.
00:39:29.640 --> 00:39:31.980
And then you look at both boats and you're like, neither one is big enough.
00:39:32.039 --> 00:39:32.880
So you keep shopping.
00:39:33.000 --> 00:39:35.220
You just keep looking for something more.
00:39:36.340 --> 00:39:42.780
And it's when you catch yourself in the space that you realize, well, I can have gratitude for where I am today, right now in this moment.
00:39:42.980 --> 00:39:44.280
I don't need a new boat today.
00:39:44.780 --> 00:39:46.860
I could have gratitude for the stuff that I have.
00:39:47.240 --> 00:39:50.500
So it's not whether you release everything or sell everything.
00:39:50.800 --> 00:39:57.340
It's more about shifting to that heart-based perspective, which is there's that benevolent being around us all the time.
00:39:57.900 --> 00:40:00.420
I have the boats because I'm supposed to have the boats.
00:40:00.420 --> 00:40:05.340
Can I enjoy the boats from a place of gratitude in the heart versus need more stuff?
00:40:05.840 --> 00:40:06.340
Yeah.
00:40:07.800 --> 00:40:16.240
So you mentioned this earlier, because most people have happened in the it takes them quite a while to integrate the experience.
00:40:17.260 --> 00:40:31.420
You said seven to 14 years on average to fully integrated people come back a lot of times depressed, you know, feeling disoriented, you know, confused, you know, all those things sometimes takes a while to recall them.
00:40:31.900 --> 00:40:33.200
So where would you say you are?
00:40:33.240 --> 00:40:37.720
Because you're like, you know, as far as NDE person, you're like a baby in the person at this point.
00:40:37.980 --> 00:40:38.880
I know it's wild.
00:40:39.820 --> 00:40:49.360
I sat on a bunch of the experience or calls with ions just to see I was curious where where am I as far as the experiences go.
00:40:49.420 --> 00:41:01.420
And I was so rare to sit on those calls sometimes 3050 other near-death experiences and not have the problem talking about it, not have the problem sharing any part of it.
00:41:01.620 --> 00:41:07.519
Like there were people in there that have had experiences for 30 years and have never even shared it with their significant other exactly.
00:41:08.260 --> 00:41:08.360
Yeah.
00:41:08.440 --> 00:41:15.880
And it was just so strange for me, other than what I was told on the other side, like you're going to be sharing information.
00:41:16.680 --> 00:41:19.300
You're not going to be able to be you anymore.
00:41:20.079 --> 00:41:24.539
And it's kind of like I understand it in a way that there was a sacrifice.
00:41:24.760 --> 00:41:26.140
I was not returning to life.
00:41:26.440 --> 00:41:28.820
Like this isn't a second chance for the executive.
00:41:29.860 --> 00:41:33.660
I am here strictly as a piece of paper with a bunch of notes written on it.
00:41:33.660 --> 00:41:38.320
I don't get to fly to Italy to eat the pasta or drink the wine.
00:41:38.420 --> 00:41:41.660
There's no part of me that would ever imagine doing it.
00:41:42.539 --> 00:41:47.539
So I'm strictly in this space of being a mouthpiece for whatever it wants to say.
00:41:48.780 --> 00:41:50.539
I came back with all the clairs.
00:41:51.120 --> 00:41:55.240
I came back with psychic abilities that just keep growing stronger.
00:41:55.440 --> 00:42:03.539
I've done medium work, all this stuff that if the executive had heard of he would have laughed in your face at the thought.
00:42:04.660 --> 00:42:06.880
So I'm here for a specific reason.
00:42:07.420 --> 00:42:15.380
There have been people that I've spoken to that have had incredible shifts in their understanding or in their lives, spiritual shifts.
00:42:16.280 --> 00:42:18.039
And I think I'm just here for that.
00:42:18.240 --> 00:42:19.180
I'm not here for everybody.
00:42:19.860 --> 00:42:24.019
I'm not somebody who's walking around the planet saying, okay, I need to get in front of more people.
00:42:24.760 --> 00:42:26.200
I don't promote myself.
00:42:27.360 --> 00:42:34.340
But there seems to be this magical thing where people are placed in front of me when they need to be placed in front of me.
00:42:34.940 --> 00:42:40.980
So I just consider myself, I'm a tool in the garden that gets picked up every once in a while.
00:42:41.740 --> 00:42:44.240
And when I'm not, people ask what I'm doing.
00:42:44.400 --> 00:42:47.519
I'm sitting on a park bench feeding birds kind of thing.
00:42:47.620 --> 00:42:48.519
I don't do anything.
00:42:49.579 --> 00:42:52.940
I don't entertain myself in any way other than existing.
00:42:54.200 --> 00:42:56.380
So it's very different.
00:42:56.559 --> 00:43:00.460
And I don't know why it's so different other than the information I was given.
00:43:00.940 --> 00:43:04.300
Now, I'm a guest, but you probably heard the term walk in.
00:43:04.900 --> 00:43:09.079
If you've been around ions people, would you consider yourself a walk in?
00:43:09.700 --> 00:43:13.700
Yes and no, I consider myself more of a walk out.
00:43:13.700 --> 00:43:23.120
And so, you know, the way I've read about walk ins is one soul decides to check out and another soul says I'll come back.
00:43:24.039 --> 00:43:29.120
There's a part of me that knows that that soul that left didn't come back.
00:43:29.620 --> 00:43:30.559
Something else did.
00:43:31.180 --> 00:43:34.740
I don't know if you would call it another soul who's looking to fulfill something.
00:43:35.620 --> 00:43:40.960
I tend to think not a more like a walk out because things have come in and out of me.
00:43:40.960 --> 00:43:45.180
Sometimes I call myself a canoe in which some things just come in for a ride and then leave.
00:43:46.360 --> 00:43:53.860
It's a different existence in a way where I don't have the human parts that is here for the lessons anymore.
00:43:54.840 --> 00:44:03.260
The lessons come from I would get into a relationship and see how can I manage through that relationship as a near-death experiencer with information.
00:44:03.700 --> 00:44:11.420
But I know I'll never be in a person.
00:44:12.320 --> 00:44:14.240
All of those things have been removed.
00:44:15.280 --> 00:44:25.200
So it's why I called myself a walk out because there's nothing in here that's supposed to experience existence in a way that I have to worry about another life review.
00:44:25.760 --> 00:44:25.940
Right.
00:44:26.079 --> 00:44:27.280
That's kind of like it's done.
00:44:27.599 --> 00:44:29.680
It's ongoing in a way, but it's done.
00:44:29.780 --> 00:44:32.740
I'm never in a position to fight desire anymore.
00:44:33.700 --> 00:44:34.140
Yeah.
00:44:34.360 --> 00:44:38.860
And you know, when I first heard the term walk in, it sounded like it was like a soul swap.
00:44:39.099 --> 00:44:41.240
Like you're one person, then you're another person.
00:44:41.840 --> 00:44:48.120
Now I think of more of a like, it's like an upgraded version of yourself that walks in is the way that I kind of view it.
00:44:48.500 --> 00:44:58.200
Yeah, I could say that in a way, I think that person who was in here was certainly upgraded.
00:44:59.059 --> 00:45:06.620
But like, for example, that person, I could also say that person never returned at all because there was so much missing from that life.
00:45:06.880 --> 00:45:14.200
It's like I have some of the memories of that life, but I'm missing so much and I can't feel the memories, which is very different.
00:45:14.820 --> 00:45:18.800
So I have them kind of like Polaroid pictures or short videos.
00:45:18.920 --> 00:45:20.240
I can't feel the experiences.
00:45:20.800 --> 00:45:30.160
Like I had really wanted this specific motorcycle that was a, you know, like a customized anniversary edition of this bike.
00:45:30.280 --> 00:45:35.120
I knew everything about it, how fast, how heavy, everything the year.
00:45:35.539 --> 00:45:41.079
And I came back and when I looked outside and I saw it in the driveway, I couldn't have told you anything.
00:45:41.140 --> 00:45:41.860
I still can't.
00:45:41.920 --> 00:45:43.099
I know nothing about it.
00:45:43.360 --> 00:45:45.240
I know, I, I know the brand.
00:45:45.579 --> 00:45:48.200
I don't even know the model, the year, nothing.
00:45:49.059 --> 00:45:57.180
And I have so much of that where I felt that this person who was in here was very into certain things.
00:45:58.059 --> 00:45:58.920
And now I'm in this place.
00:45:58.960 --> 00:46:00.039
I know nothing about them.
00:46:01.059 --> 00:46:05.780
So I, I have a hard time putting a label on exactly what it is or why.
00:46:06.160 --> 00:46:06.340
Sure.
00:46:07.660 --> 00:46:13.300
But I just know I'm here to, I'm here as a messenger in a way to release some information.
00:46:13.320 --> 00:46:15.660
And then what happens from there?
00:46:15.740 --> 00:46:16.079
Who knows?
00:46:16.539 --> 00:46:16.960
Yeah.
00:46:17.460 --> 00:46:27.740
And you mentioned some of the Claire's that you have for, and for those people that are listening, Claire's are abilities or senses, extra, extra, extra sensory, I guess.
00:46:28.980 --> 00:46:31.039
So tell me about the Claire's that you came back with.
00:46:31.280 --> 00:46:32.940
Yeah, I have all of them.
00:46:33.220 --> 00:46:46.780
I can see the knowing Claire cognizance, I can hear auditorily, I'll know if something's in the room or if I'm about to get a prediction, I get visions, I can smell, I can taste it.
00:46:47.880 --> 00:46:52.340
I have like this soul sense, which I believe Rudolph Steiner talked about a little bit.
00:46:53.720 --> 00:46:56.240
It's, it's all of the above.
00:46:57.280 --> 00:46:59.340
There's no one part of it that I don't have.
00:46:59.840 --> 00:47:14.840
It took me a year to kind of settle into this because to go from a materialistic executive who was worried about who's playing football to now getting predictions about things happening in the world took a bit to get used to.
00:47:15.320 --> 00:47:26.340
I, you know, I predicted the LA wildfires three days before they happened, an avalanche in Switzerland that swallowed a village, earthquakes throughout, and many things to come.
00:47:27.320 --> 00:47:30.320
And I use it for people.
00:47:30.579 --> 00:47:31.599
I don't use it for myself.
00:47:31.740 --> 00:47:36.220
That was a message I received, but again, it was like, do not use anything for yourself.
00:47:37.120 --> 00:47:42.200
So I help people who have lost others with medium work, or I help them with guidance.
00:47:43.599 --> 00:47:46.400
You could call it psychic readings, but I try not to.
00:47:47.579 --> 00:47:52.700
If you're looking to know who you're supposed to marry or not, I won't give you the answer that doesn't serve as progression.
00:47:53.700 --> 00:48:04.940
So I know I'm given these things strictly to help others progress through the places they're stuck with their, their view or their lens of what their existence is actually about.
00:48:06.320 --> 00:48:06.720
Yeah.
00:48:06.720 --> 00:48:11.860
Now, I most of us live with this thing that we call the veil are called the veil, right?
00:48:12.079 --> 00:48:16.800
There's this, this forgetfulness, there's not we don't have the clairs when I have all those senses.
00:48:17.780 --> 00:48:22.160
What do you think the purposes of you having these abilities?
00:48:22.340 --> 00:48:25.099
Because I tell people, I think the veils there for a reason.
00:48:25.519 --> 00:48:30.240
Be careful what you wish for, because people, a lot of times people to come back from these experiences.
00:48:30.880 --> 00:48:35.579
It's not, it's not a good thing to have an NDE sounds like it's a different experience for you.
00:48:35.720 --> 00:48:38.579
But for the rest of us, what is the purpose of the forgetfulness?
00:48:39.519 --> 00:48:48.700
Yeah, I would say it's definitely not easy, or I wouldn't recommend an NDE, you know, your life, it literally gets turned upside down.
00:48:50.360 --> 00:48:53.260
You know, the veil, I look at the veil a little bit differently.
00:48:53.400 --> 00:49:02.539
The forgetfulness, when I experienced a view of other existences on the other side, and I have also experienced it here as well some more.
00:49:03.660 --> 00:49:08.140
If you can imagine what it would feel like to have imagine every thought you've ever had.
00:49:08.480 --> 00:49:16.220
Now multiply that by another existence, the weight of it, the yearning for happiness, comfort, the desire for things.
00:49:16.960 --> 00:49:18.840
Imagine all those thoughts you've had in your lifetime.
00:49:18.840 --> 00:49:20.760
Now multiply that by multiple lifetimes.
00:49:21.000 --> 00:49:25.900
You don't want to remember you trust me, you don't when I felt and when I felt that it was crushing.
00:49:26.800 --> 00:49:29.700
I think it would break us if we did have the remembering.
00:49:30.620 --> 00:49:34.700
I do believe there's a bleed over though, we're supposed to remember certain things, right?
00:49:34.780 --> 00:49:37.599
We're drawn to certain things in our life for certain reasons.
00:49:38.840 --> 00:49:44.519
You know, some of us are drawn to sports or some of us are drawn to cooking, and you wonder, well, why I don't know, it's just something I liked.
00:49:45.079 --> 00:49:54.760
And you're kind of you understand that existence is like the some simultaneous thing that happens, it isn't linear time, like, oh, that, that existence was 1000 years ago.
00:49:54.900 --> 00:49:57.140
It's kind of overlapping in a weird way.
00:49:57.140 --> 00:49:58.519
So you have this bleed through.
00:49:59.380 --> 00:50:29.480
But the veil, as I understand it is, is more transparent than you would believe the veil, I like to call you the veil, who you think you are is the veil, like all of our spiritual beliefs, all of our definitions of what we think reality is, all our positions that we take for understanding, when you start to release them, you start to pull back this curtain, which on the other side is the sun, the sun's always been shining, it's never not been shining.
00:50:29.740 --> 00:50:33.019
And when you kind of pull it back, you realize, oh, did you guys know there's a sun out here?
00:50:33.680 --> 00:50:40.140
And it's kind of like, yeah, and then you shut the curtain again, you know, you stub your toe in a piece of furniture, and this curtain gets shut.
00:50:40.880 --> 00:50:55.120
So it's, it's being aware or finding stillness within yourself, which is the absence of that fabricated self trying to find and get or seek something that allows that curtain to be pulled back.
00:50:55.860 --> 00:50:58.760
And I like to tell everybody, yes, I was given a lot of information.
00:50:59.620 --> 00:51:04.460
And I have a greater understanding of how existence works.
00:51:04.760 --> 00:51:06.120
But you can have that too.
00:51:06.260 --> 00:51:07.440
You don't need the experience.
00:51:08.300 --> 00:51:13.760
You know, it's more or less pull the curtain back and let yourself feel it every now and then expose yourself to it.
00:51:13.960 --> 00:51:17.320
It's there, it's literally knocking on the window on the other side of the curtain.
00:51:18.500 --> 00:51:21.980
And when you get into that space, you that's when you start to remember.
00:51:22.900 --> 00:51:24.519
A lot of people say we're here to learn.
00:51:25.440 --> 00:51:27.260
And I'll adjust that word a little bit.
00:51:27.360 --> 00:51:29.460
So yes, there are some things you are here to learn.
00:51:29.519 --> 00:51:31.539
But for the most part, you're here to remember.
00:51:32.300 --> 00:51:40.079
You're here to remember you're a loving being, you're here to remember your connection to all things, you're here to remember that there's a benevolent force around us all the time.
00:51:40.539 --> 00:51:45.660
And when you start remembering in that space, it stuff is given to you.
00:51:45.880 --> 00:51:51.700
You just receive you're in a state of reception versus I need information to give me an answer.
00:51:51.900 --> 00:51:53.420
That's pushing it all away, right?
00:51:53.760 --> 00:51:54.820
Somebody's trying to hand you something.
00:51:55.000 --> 00:51:55.599
You're like, no, thanks.
00:51:55.740 --> 00:51:56.920
Let me let me go get it.
00:51:57.300 --> 00:52:01.460
So it's really recognizing where you are in your existence.
00:52:01.460 --> 00:52:10.880
You know, have a meditative practice that will help you have a gratitude practice when you wake up that will help you or just take a walk in nature every once in a while and just be grateful.
00:52:12.099 --> 00:52:14.960
It's in those spaces that you're allowed to remember more.
00:52:15.740 --> 00:52:15.840
Yeah.
00:52:16.400 --> 00:52:19.599
So Jonathan, I'm curious about relationships.
00:52:20.120 --> 00:52:27.880
Because again, a lot of times people that have had a near death experience struggle with relationships, you know, they might come back and their spouse says, I don't even know who you are.
00:52:28.720 --> 00:52:31.620
What's it been like for you with family, friends, etc.
00:52:32.300 --> 00:52:37.099
Yeah, friends across the board, I would say I lost 99.9% of them.
00:52:37.340 --> 00:52:41.440
I mean, I was not a spiritual person, I would have laughed in your face if you were spiritual.
00:52:41.920 --> 00:52:43.900
So I hung her out with those people.
00:52:44.420 --> 00:52:47.019
And here, and here I come back as fully spiritual.
00:52:47.220 --> 00:52:49.940
They're like, no, no, no, you're, you're changed.
00:52:50.780 --> 00:52:52.300
So all the friends disappeared.
00:52:53.079 --> 00:52:54.519
Family is good family.
00:52:55.460 --> 00:52:56.980
It's, it's hard, right?
00:52:57.120 --> 00:53:01.220
It's like, my mother and brother, I think have a harder time with it.
00:53:01.340 --> 00:53:03.260
My father's on his way out of existence.
00:53:03.260 --> 00:53:04.840
So he's very open to it.
00:53:05.039 --> 00:53:12.599
But it's how do you rationalize someone who you knew so well, who then wakes up and is not that person anymore?
00:53:13.079 --> 00:53:16.000
It's like, you look the same, you sound the same, but you're not the same.
00:53:16.920 --> 00:53:18.460
And I think that's across the board.
00:53:18.840 --> 00:53:21.599
I don't I was a single guy when I passed.
00:53:23.000 --> 00:53:24.720
Happy to date anybody kind of guy.
00:53:24.960 --> 00:53:31.019
And now I'm sitting in this place where I don't feel the need for any type of relationship.
00:53:31.579 --> 00:53:32.860
I don't seek friends.
00:53:32.860 --> 00:53:34.240
I love everybody.
00:53:34.460 --> 00:53:36.579
I don't have a definition of what a friend is.
00:53:36.720 --> 00:53:38.420
I'll do anything for anyone, if I can.
00:53:39.360 --> 00:53:42.559
I don't have a definition anymore for what's family and what's not.
00:53:43.240 --> 00:53:53.240
It's after experiencing and understanding that connection, we're, we're more connected than we realize because those ties are far deeper than any familial tie.
00:53:53.300 --> 00:53:58.720
We think we have, it's like everybody's your mother, everybody's your brother, everybody's your sister.
00:53:59.240 --> 00:54:04.400
So I walked through life with just, I don't know you, but I already love you.
00:54:04.559 --> 00:54:05.920
What do you, what can I help you with?
00:54:06.200 --> 00:54:07.940
How can I serve you today?
00:54:09.420 --> 00:54:13.240
So yeah, it's part of that complete change that I came back.
00:54:13.519 --> 00:54:15.240
It's not a normal human existence.
00:54:16.120 --> 00:54:17.820
Yeah, I would imagine that.
00:54:18.099 --> 00:54:23.220
And I know when we when we try to change, a lot of times families like no, no, no, this is who you are.
00:54:23.700 --> 00:54:25.720
You've always been Jonathan, you've always been like this.
00:54:25.940 --> 00:54:27.360
So you mentioned your brother and your brother.
00:54:27.519 --> 00:54:30.019
Did they ever say, no, I know who you are.
00:54:30.579 --> 00:54:32.980
No, I can feel things on them.
00:54:33.019 --> 00:54:35.300
They don't come out and say it, but I can feel the thoughts.
00:54:36.120 --> 00:54:36.920
I get one of the gifts.
00:54:38.519 --> 00:54:42.340
No, there was never any challenge to me about who I was, because it's so different.
00:54:42.700 --> 00:54:44.940
It wasn't like I came back three degrees different.
00:54:46.800 --> 00:54:47.480
Completely different.
00:54:47.500 --> 00:54:50.480
So it's just kind of like, okay, that's who he is now.
00:54:51.860 --> 00:54:54.940
I have had friends, though, wonder, right?
00:54:55.160 --> 00:54:57.599
You know, friends, like, is it true?
00:54:57.800 --> 00:54:58.380
Is it real?
00:54:58.539 --> 00:54:59.000
Is it real?
00:54:59.559 --> 00:55:01.920
And then you have like the 10 minute conversation with them.
00:55:02.760 --> 00:55:11.160
Instead of, you know, given the special handshake, or like bumping elbows as just one of the bros, you're like, let me give you a hug.
00:55:11.400 --> 00:55:14.760
And they're like, there's just something so weird with you, something so different.
00:55:15.380 --> 00:55:15.480
Yeah.
00:55:15.880 --> 00:55:20.340
So it's yeah, I don't get the calls to go out for a beer anymore, any, any of that stuff.
00:55:20.480 --> 00:55:22.820
And I came back, I would never have one again.
00:55:22.980 --> 00:55:27.380
So it's kind of like, it just slowly dissipated.
00:55:27.640 --> 00:55:33.900
No one ever challenged me from the friend pool, because I know they can feel what's on me or in me or around me.
00:55:34.620 --> 00:55:41.019
And when I walk by people in the grocery store, they, they can feel it, especially the ones who knew me before.
00:55:41.599 --> 00:55:41.700
Yeah.
00:55:42.160 --> 00:55:43.880
So you mentioned you wouldn't go out for a beer anymore.
00:55:44.099 --> 00:55:44.980
You don't drink beer.
00:55:44.980 --> 00:55:46.720
Are you vegan?
00:55:47.680 --> 00:55:49.440
How have the things changed?
00:55:50.539 --> 00:55:51.500
Yeah, a lot.
00:55:52.099 --> 00:55:55.640
You know, I was a coffee snob, I had 10 different ways to make coffee in the house.
00:55:55.720 --> 00:55:57.680
And I would do pour overs and all the special stuff.
00:55:57.940 --> 00:56:00.579
And I loved getting into making coffee.
00:56:00.579 --> 00:56:02.900
And I came back and I can't drink coffee anymore.
00:56:03.120 --> 00:56:05.660
And I'm not allowed any stimulants.
00:56:06.360 --> 00:56:11.780
Coffee, sugar, alcohol, alcohol was a part of my life being out and socializing.
00:56:12.099 --> 00:56:16.579
Even the sports that I did were, you know, there was always an alcoholic aspect to it.
00:56:16.760 --> 00:56:20.500
The more you went out and no, no alcohol whatsoever.
00:56:21.220 --> 00:56:24.079
I was somebody who ate out almost every night.
00:56:24.200 --> 00:56:26.980
I wanted to be in the busy restaurants enjoying the great food.
00:56:27.539 --> 00:56:28.480
I haven't eaten out.
00:56:28.660 --> 00:56:29.500
I won't eat out.
00:56:30.400 --> 00:56:31.059
I seek solitude.
00:56:31.320 --> 00:56:38.599
I was the guy that wanted to be in the busiest bar in the middle of the tornado with the band going and everyone's getting loud and having fun.
00:56:39.579 --> 00:56:42.980
And now I struggle to walk into a busy coffee shop.
00:56:43.140 --> 00:56:44.039
I just feel too much.
00:56:44.960 --> 00:56:46.400
So yeah, life changed.
00:56:46.660 --> 00:56:48.599
My diet is different.
00:56:49.039 --> 00:56:50.500
People ask me all the time, are you vegan?
00:56:50.620 --> 00:56:51.260
Do you eat meat?
00:56:51.400 --> 00:56:57.840
I said, well, what I experienced on the other side is everything is here experiencing what they're supposed to experience.
00:56:58.160 --> 00:57:06.460
And if the cow chooses to experience as a cow to be eaten, then that was its choice because it's not really a cow.
00:57:07.579 --> 00:57:09.599
Everything here is a being, everything here is alive.
00:57:09.720 --> 00:57:12.260
The rock you kick is just as alive as the cow.
00:57:12.460 --> 00:57:13.620
You just don't realize it.
00:57:14.680 --> 00:57:20.140
So it's kind of like there is nothing here that we're not supposed to experience.
00:57:20.340 --> 00:57:26.420
In fact, there's no place that we can stand where we don't affect the life and death cycle of all things here.
00:57:26.660 --> 00:57:26.960
Exactly.
00:57:27.780 --> 00:57:30.960
So all we can do is experience it and have gratitude for it.
00:57:31.039 --> 00:57:35.079
You know, we look at death as an awful thing here.
00:57:35.320 --> 00:57:36.519
We're just not good with it.
00:57:37.059 --> 00:57:39.140
And in the end, death is the release.
00:57:39.340 --> 00:57:39.740
It's freedom.
00:57:40.000 --> 00:57:41.980
It's like it's leaving prison.
00:57:43.140 --> 00:57:49.680
And if something is supposed to die the way it's supposed to die, it's not to be horribly sad over it.
00:57:49.860 --> 00:57:50.960
There will be that grief.
00:57:51.120 --> 00:57:52.039
There will be that struggle.
00:57:53.160 --> 00:58:04.840
But if you can bring it to the end where it's love to know that being experienced, what they're they experience to be free of it, then we can start to love the fullness of the experience rather than just segments of it.
00:58:05.440 --> 00:58:05.539
Yeah.
00:58:06.099 --> 00:58:18.920
You mentioned at the beginning that the being that you encountered in 33 years old brown hair, brown eyes, and looking at you and talking to you, I'm hearing a lot of Jesus and what you're saying.
00:58:20.079 --> 00:58:20.800
What are you talking about?
00:58:20.940 --> 00:58:22.000
I look nothing like the guy.
00:58:23.000 --> 00:58:23.980
I don't know.
00:58:25.640 --> 00:58:33.900
But, you know, really, and it's really interesting to me because I was raised as a Christian and I was told there was just a special being Jesus who was the Son of God.
00:58:34.660 --> 00:58:39.280
And I know a lot of atheist materialists, they'll go to the other side and they're like, I was really surprised.
00:58:39.460 --> 00:58:40.720
I met this guy named Jesus.
00:58:41.900 --> 00:58:42.740
Any thoughts on that?
00:58:43.760 --> 00:58:44.160
Yeah.
00:58:44.160 --> 00:58:50.640
The reason why I don't use his name is because of our concept of what he is or who he is.
00:58:51.700 --> 00:58:56.700
You'll hear a lot of him come through me because that's what comes through.
00:58:57.599 --> 00:58:59.800
That's who is showing me all of these things.
00:59:00.920 --> 00:59:06.440
I just know that you can remove any religious context you have for him.
00:59:07.260 --> 00:59:08.780
He was pre-religion.
00:59:10.200 --> 00:59:12.160
His lessons had no religion.
00:59:12.860 --> 00:59:15.620
His lessons were the kingdom of God is within.
00:59:17.099 --> 00:59:27.039
And it's all of the stuff that we have afterwards that we point at the picture and say, I worship him instead of understanding what he was trying to show us.
00:59:28.280 --> 00:59:30.079
I'll just say God has no religion.
00:59:30.420 --> 00:59:37.740
When I was there and I was fully integrated with it, there are no defining lines that says he's this or he isn't this.
00:59:38.660 --> 00:59:42.599
What I will say is what he represents and what I felt mostly was love.
00:59:43.519 --> 00:59:46.760
You could remove the name Jesus and just call it love.
00:59:47.280 --> 00:59:55.920
It was the most incredible love and brotherly love and a love that you want to feel the rest of your days, but then you realize that love is already within you.
00:59:56.460 --> 01:00:00.400
That love lives within you and it's a matter of calling it forward.
01:00:00.620 --> 01:00:09.099
It's not something you necessarily have to be taught, but yeah, it was him, but not him as you would call him based on human understanding.
01:00:09.800 --> 01:00:11.420
No, I absolutely understand.
01:00:11.760 --> 01:00:24.360
I know the person of Jesus has been hijacked by one religion in particular who have made that person into something that he wasn't, who put words in his mouth.
01:00:25.519 --> 01:00:35.920
I hear from you what I believe the true message that he was trying to deliver would just go beyond any particular religion, which is why the religious people conspired to have him murdered.
01:00:36.160 --> 01:00:39.200
It's not like they were all into him.
01:00:39.599 --> 01:00:39.700
Right.
01:00:40.180 --> 01:00:41.039
Yeah, you have it right.
01:00:42.360 --> 01:00:45.620
He was not religious in the way he spoke.
01:00:46.140 --> 01:00:49.980
He was not divisive in the way he spoke.
01:00:50.200 --> 01:00:57.780
He was incredibly loving and incredibly sharing and has showed up in me in ways that others have seen.
01:00:58.480 --> 01:00:59.500
I always laugh.
01:00:59.660 --> 01:01:03.840
That's why I record the talks that I do because sometimes he does come through.
01:01:05.300 --> 01:01:06.900
But he's in everybody.
01:01:07.880 --> 01:01:11.099
That's the problem until you understand that he never left.
01:01:12.000 --> 01:01:12.380
He's in.
01:01:12.500 --> 01:01:13.640
He's within all of us.
01:01:13.820 --> 01:01:16.539
It's just a matter of letting him come through.
01:01:17.440 --> 01:01:25.780
Yeah, so Jonathan, for people that are listening and a lot of times people that listen to my program are people who are grieving.
01:01:26.380 --> 01:01:28.360
They've been through some of the worst things in life.
01:01:28.579 --> 01:01:30.140
They're asking themselves, why?
01:01:30.519 --> 01:01:31.559
Why am I here?
01:01:31.700 --> 01:01:32.840
What's the meaning of all this?
01:01:33.240 --> 01:01:34.519
What message do you have for them?
01:01:35.380 --> 01:01:38.519
You are loved more than you could ever possibly imagine.
01:01:39.140 --> 01:01:42.840
In everything that you're experiencing, there is love.
01:01:44.099 --> 01:01:51.700
It's hard to feel it when you're at the bottom, when you're underwater, so to speak.
01:01:52.039 --> 01:01:54.760
But there's a hand there for you to grab.
01:01:55.480 --> 01:01:59.280
And if you just acknowledge that it's in the room with you, it'll help.
01:01:59.780 --> 01:02:00.940
It's waiting for your acknowledgment.
01:02:01.300 --> 01:02:02.140
It doesn't need your worship.
01:02:02.340 --> 01:02:04.099
It doesn't need you to light a candle for it.
01:02:04.800 --> 01:02:09.559
It just wants you to know that it's there and talk to it.
01:02:09.920 --> 01:02:11.140
You don't need to be on your knees.
01:02:11.800 --> 01:02:13.380
You don't need to find a church.
01:02:14.180 --> 01:02:17.740
You just need to be in your heart and that's what it's waiting for.
01:02:17.880 --> 01:02:18.740
Wow, okay.
01:02:19.240 --> 01:02:19.420
Great.
01:02:19.579 --> 01:02:22.200
I think that is a great way to end our time together today.
01:02:23.200 --> 01:02:25.539
I know you allow people to reach out to you.
01:02:25.700 --> 01:02:26.780
You don't sell anything.
01:02:27.000 --> 01:02:29.220
But if people do want to reach out to you, how can they do that?
01:02:29.820 --> 01:02:30.760
You can reach me up.
01:02:31.440 --> 01:02:33.059
Jonathanashford.com is my website.
01:02:33.880 --> 01:02:34.740
Okay, that's great.
01:02:34.800 --> 01:02:36.380
I'll put that in the show notes, everything Jonathan.
01:02:36.680 --> 01:02:37.280
It's been an honor.
01:02:37.420 --> 01:02:38.320
Thanks for being here today.
01:02:38.579 --> 01:02:39.260
Thank you, Brian.
01:02:39.420 --> 01:02:40.660
Thank you so much.