00:04:47Defining Your Personal Mission
00:09:30Understanding Your Values
00:15:00Living Life on Purpose
ABOUT THIS EPISODE
Clarify Your Life Goals with Mission, Vision, and Values
There’s that exhilarating feeling when everything just clicks into place. You’ve spent hours dreaming big, setting those massive goals for yourself, and visualizing the impact you want to have on the world.
But then reality hits, and you find yourself stuck, wondering why you can't get past the planning stage.
In this episode about Mission Vision and Values, I unravel this puzzle for you.
Ever felt like your goals are slipping away, no matter how hard you chase them?
There are a few essential steps you might be missing - something fundamental that transforms dreams into achievable targets.
Imagine what it would be like to set goals and actually see them through, to feel that powerful sense of accomplishment without the constant back and forth.
Intrigued? Your life, and business, could change dramatically by applying a simple exercise I'll discuss.
It’s not just about setting goals; it’s about embedding purpose and clarity into them.
Ready to start the transformation? If you're racing against time, skip straight to [00:02:19] for the heart of the matter.
Trust me, you don’t want to miss this.
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SHOW NOTES 🔗
TRANSCRIPT 🔗
Katie McManus
00:00:18
Let's talk about your mission, vision and values.
Katie McManus
00:00:21
Hi, I'm Katie McManus, business strategist and money mindset coach.
Katie McManus
00:00:24
And welcome to the we have.
Katie McManus
00:00:26
If you're goal setting without doing this fundamental step, then you're basically setting yourself up for failure and you're wasting a ton of time.
Katie McManus
00:00:34
And I don't want that for you.
Katie McManus
00:00:36
I don't think you want that for you either.
Katie McManus
00:00:38
We are coming up on the new year and this is prime time for people to set some really big goals for the coming year.
Katie McManus
00:00:45
And if you want those goals to be possible, if you want to actually achieve some things in the coming year, then I recommend taking a few hours and doing a little exercise that everyone in branding and marketing knows.
Katie McManus
00:01:01
It's called mission, Vision, Values.
Katie McManus
00:01:06
Because we all know that a goal without a strong why doesn't end up happening.
Katie McManus
00:01:12
There was this one time when I was 25 years old and I was working at Equinox and we were in the presale office and I arrived to work and I think I was just feeling like bloated that day.
Katie McManus
00:01:20
So I turned to my coworkers, I was like, you know what?
Katie McManus
00:01:23
I'm going to give up.
Katie McManus
00:01:23
I'm going to give up bread.
Katie McManus
00:01:25
And if you know me, you know that bread is my all time favorite thing.
Katie McManus
00:01:29
I will just eat a loaf of bread without butter, without toasting it.
Katie McManus
00:01:33
Like nothing, nothing added, no cheese.
Katie McManus
00:01:35
I just love bread.
Katie McManus
00:01:37
And so I was like, you know what?
Katie McManus
00:01:38
I'm going to give up bread.
Katie McManus
00:01:39
And they were like, okay, like, unsure why I was announcing it to the room.
Katie McManus
00:01:44
And this is about like 9:30 or 10 in the morning.
Katie McManus
00:01:47
I went on lunch at around 11.
Katie McManus
00:01:50
I came back to the office around 11:30 and I had already eaten half a loaf of sourdough bread.
Katie McManus
00:01:55
And they looked at me with this massive loaf of bread in my hands and I was obviously chewing.
Katie McManus
00:02:01
They're like, I thought you were giving up bread.
Katie McManus
00:02:04
And I was like, well, it was too hard.
Katie McManus
00:02:05
I could just, I couldn't do it.
Katie McManus
00:02:06
I was thinking about bread too much.
Katie McManus
00:02:08
This is a great example of a shitty goal that has no solid.
Katie McManus
00:02:11
Why There was no science behind bread being the cause.
Katie McManus
00:02:15
For me feeling puffy, I didn't really need to lose weight.
Katie McManus
00:02:18
I don't know why I said I was going to give up bread.
Katie McManus
00:02:19
It was a stupid thing to do.
Katie McManus
00:02:21
I'm sorry.
Katie McManus
00:02:22
Bread.
Katie McManus
00:02:22
I will never do it again.
Katie McManus
00:02:23
We're besties.
Katie McManus
00:02:25
But it's a great example of why you need a solid.
Katie McManus
00:02:28
Why if you're going to reach A goal.
Katie McManus
00:02:29
About a year later, I made another goal of getting eight hours of sleep a night.
Katie McManus
00:02:35
And this was my New Year's resolution.
Katie McManus
00:02:37
I think I was like 26 years old.
Katie McManus
00:02:40
And my why was I was unhappy.
Katie McManus
00:02:44
My why was I knew I wasn't being healthy.
Katie McManus
00:02:48
There were things about my lifestyle that I just wasn't into anymore.
Katie McManus
00:02:51
And I really wanted to do something for myself to make myself feel better.
Katie McManus
00:02:56
And I knew that stealing sleep from myself all the time, burning the candle at both ends was not serving me.
Katie McManus
00:03:03
And I came up with a very specific plan.
Katie McManus
00:03:05
That I would be in bed with all my electronics off by 9pm every single night for at least three months.
Katie McManus
00:03:12
And that even if I couldn't fall asleep, I would just lay there and let myself rest in the silence and in the dark.
Katie McManus
00:03:20
That goal I was massively successful with.
Katie McManus
00:03:24
That goal actually changed my life because with all that extra sleep, I was able to get clear on the things that were working and not working for me in my life.
Katie McManus
00:03:33
And it allowed me to really see what it was I wanted instead.
Katie McManus
00:03:36
And not just that, start planning to get it.
Katie McManus
00:03:40
If you need ideas for a good New Year's resolution, I can't recommend this one enough.
Katie McManus
00:03:44
Now, of course, these are just small goals.
Katie McManus
00:03:47
They're not the goal for your life.
Katie McManus
00:03:49
A small goal is far easier to reach than your big life goals.
Katie McManus
00:03:55
I want you to think back on, like when you told yourself you were going to do something for 30 days in a row or 100 days in a row, how hard was it?
Katie McManus
00:04:04
How many days did you want to quit?
Katie McManus
00:04:06
And what kept you accountable to doing it?
Katie McManus
00:04:09
Was it social pressure?
Katie McManus
00:04:11
Was it you had a really great.
Katie McManus
00:04:12
Why?
Katie McManus
00:04:13
Was it fear of failing?
Katie McManus
00:04:14
Was it that, like that sensation of wanting to feel proud of yourself for accomplishing something?
Katie McManus
00:04:21
All of those are really incredible tools to use when you have a short goal.
Katie McManus
00:04:26
But when we're thinking about the mission, the goal we want to have for our life, the impact we want to have, the amount of money we want to make, how we want to spend our time, it's way longer than 30 days, my friend.
Katie McManus
00:04:41
These kinds of things happen over years, over decades.
Katie McManus
00:04:45
How are you going to keep yourself in the game for that?
Katie McManus
00:04:48
Well, I'm about to tell you.
Katie McManus
00:04:50
So let me break down what these things mean.
Katie McManus
00:04:55
So your mission is the big, audacious, juicy goal that you have for your life.
Katie McManus
00:05:02
What's the thing you want to accomplish, the impact you want to have in the world where a lot of people get hung up when they think about their mission is they Think it has to be holier than thou.
Katie McManus
00:05:14
It has to be something that's good for everyone else and saves the world and is good for the environment and this and that and the other thing.
Katie McManus
00:05:22
And like, sure, if you want it to be that, if it actually is that, if your main driver is you want to make sure that no child is hungry ever, then cool.
Katie McManus
00:05:33
That can be the mission for your life.
Katie McManus
00:05:35
But if you're just saying that because you think it sounds good and it sounds altruistic and it makes you a good person, it's not your mission.
Katie McManus
00:05:45
You see, every one of those motivations for that being your mission is external.
Katie McManus
00:05:50
It's what other people think.
Katie McManus
00:05:52
This is where a lot of people get their mission for their life wrong is they think, oh, my gosh, okay, well, here's my time to shine.
Katie McManus
00:06:00
Here's my time to prove how good a person I am, how worthy I am of love and respect and attention.
Katie McManus
00:06:09
And let me tell you, if whenever you do something to show other people how worthy and deserving you are, it never works.
Katie McManus
00:06:17
Because if you're surrounded with people who are already withholding love and making you feel like you're worthy and deserving of their respect, guess what?
Katie McManus
00:06:26
There's no changing that.
Katie McManus
00:06:28
They're not the right people to have in your life.
Katie McManus
00:06:31
And love and worthiness and deserving are not things that you can ever earn.
Katie McManus
00:06:35
They're just things that you have inherently.
Katie McManus
00:06:38
So let yourself off the hook for the missions that sound good.
Katie McManus
00:06:43
Your mission can be that you want to make people laugh.
Katie McManus
00:06:46
Your mission can be that you feel at home in your body.
Katie McManus
00:06:50
Your mission can absolutely be about ending homelessness.
Katie McManus
00:06:55
But the reason why you want to end homelessness has to be about you.
Katie McManus
00:07:01
Has to be about the impact you want to have for yourself.
Katie McManus
00:07:06
What's the feeling of pride?
Katie McManus
00:07:08
And I know there's a lot of people who are like, well, pride, Isn't that a bad thing?
Katie McManus
00:07:12
Absolutely F not.
Katie McManus
00:07:14
Pride is just like money.
Katie McManus
00:07:17
If you're a good person, you're going to be proud of the good things you do.
Katie McManus
00:07:21
If you're a bad person, you're going to be proud of the bad things you did and got away with.
Katie McManus
00:07:27
I'll hazard guess if you're listening to this podcast, you're probably a pretty good person.
Katie McManus
00:07:32
So you're not going to go and pour a bunch of barrels of oil into the local pond and feel really proud that you killed all the animals.
Katie McManus
00:07:41
And if you are that kind of person, please stop listening right now and go seek help and remember that this is your personal mission.
Katie McManus
00:07:50
This is the mission for your life.
Katie McManus
00:07:52
You can have a different mission for, say, your business or a nonprofit that you establish.
Katie McManus
00:07:59
One of the reasons why this topic actually came up for me, and I wanted to talk about it on this podcast, is I recently did this exercise with the other executives for the Gay Birthday Club, which is a nonprofit I just started.
Katie McManus
00:08:10
And our mission for the nonprofit is very, very different from my personal mission in my life.
Katie McManus
00:08:18
And I'll use it as an example to show you what you can make your mission for your business or your nonprofit.
Katie McManus
00:08:24
So at the Gay Birthday Club, we believe that everyone deserves a cringey, love filled, embarrassing birthday phone call from their family.
Katie McManus
00:08:33
Welcome to the Gay Birthday Club in an all inclusive organization committed to bringing joy to members of the LGBTQIA community to celebrate their birthdays.
Katie McManus
00:08:43
Choose us as your family.
Katie McManus
00:08:45
All the love, none of the political arguments on the holidays.
Katie McManus
00:08:48
That's a beautiful mission for that nonprofit that wants to have that impact, but that's not my personal mission.
Katie McManus
00:08:55
I deeply want you to spend some time reflecting on what you want.
Katie McManus
00:09:03
And I want you to think about when you're old and maybe decrepit, can't get around very easily, and you're on your deathbed and there are people around crying.
Katie McManus
00:09:11
I want you to think about who would you regret not being in your life if you got to the end of your life and you just, you didn't do this?
Katie McManus
00:09:22
That gets to be your mission.
Katie McManus
00:09:23
It gets to be selfish.
Katie McManus
00:09:25
It also gets to be a little vague because that's where your vision's gonna come in.
Katie McManus
00:10:20
Speaking of vision, let's talk about what this can be for you.
Katie McManus
00:10:23
So your vision is aligned with your mission, but instead of it being like the what you wanna accomplish, it's the how you're gonna do it.
Katie McManus
00:10:33
So, again, for example, the Gay Birthday Club, our mission is very clear.
Katie McManus
00:10:39
We stand for everyone in the LGBTQIA community getting a cringy, love filled birthday call on their birthday.
Katie McManus
00:10:47
Our vision is that we will be the ones to call them.
Katie McManus
00:10:52
If they don't already get that call from family.
Katie McManus
00:10:55
We will be their family.
Katie McManus
00:10:57
Not only that, but we want to have a greater impact.
Katie McManus
00:10:59
So we do fundraising so that we can, A, keep our operations going and B, give grants to organizations that are doing more serious work supporting the LGBTQ community.
Katie McManus
00:11:13
There are a few other things that we want to do.
Katie McManus
00:11:15
We'll be adding to this vision as we grow the organization, but this is where you get to get really specific about how you're going to enact your Mission.
Katie McManus
00:11:23
Say your mission is all about making people laugh, because you just enjoy being in a room where there's always laughter happening.
Katie McManus
00:11:30
That's what lights you up.
Katie McManus
00:11:32
That's what makes you feel good and warm and loved.
Katie McManus
00:11:34
Part of your vision could be hanging out with comedians.
Katie McManus
00:11:38
It could be you join book clubs where people read funny novels.
Katie McManus
00:11:43
It could be that you take an improv class or a standup comedian class.
Katie McManus
00:11:48
It could be that you don't take life so seriously.
Katie McManus
00:11:51
The important thing about really digging into your vision is that it keeps you on the tracks to reach the big goal.
Katie McManus
00:12:01
Because if your mission for your life is to always have laughter, part of that vision doesn't necessarily mean gardening.
Katie McManus
00:12:08
Like, you're going to garden all the time.
Katie McManus
00:12:10
It can be a hobby you have, but it's not necessarily going to be your life's work.
Katie McManus
00:12:14
Right.
Katie McManus
00:12:14
It doesn't really land there.
Katie McManus
00:12:15
When you're working towards this goal of creating life that you want, you're not going to look at that part of your life or that hobby as part.
Katie McManus
00:12:24
So, for example, for the Gay Birthday Club, our mission is pretty clear and our vision kind of breaks down how we're going to do it.
Katie McManus
00:12:32
It wouldn't quite fit for us to also have that we do beach cleanups, right?
Katie McManus
00:12:36
Because there's no clear correlation between a beach cleanup and making sure that folks in the LGBTQ community get cringy, love filled calls on their birthday.
Katie McManus
00:12:46
There's no clear correlation between taking plastic out of the environment and supporting this community.
Katie McManus
00:12:53
Now, they're both amazing things to do.
Katie McManus
00:12:55
You know, if you have some free time and a garbage bag and some gloves, I recommend you go down to the beach and do a beach cleanup at any point.
Katie McManus
00:13:02
Pretty much every beach needs it.
Katie McManus
00:13:03
But just like in a nonprofit setting, it would be really easy to be like, oh, well, that's a good thing to do.
Katie McManus
00:13:08
We're a nonprofit.
Katie McManus
00:13:09
We do good things.
Katie McManus
00:13:09
I could absolutely have everyone do this.
Katie McManus
00:13:12
It doesn't quite make sense.
Katie McManus
00:13:14
Not on brand.
Katie McManus
00:13:15
And remember, we're not living our lives for everyone else.
Katie McManus
00:13:19
We're not living our lives to impress other people about what good people we are.
Katie McManus
00:13:23
You are living your life so that when you get to your deathbed, you will have no regrets.
Katie McManus
00:13:29
A big regret that people have is around getting distracted from what they want.
Katie McManus
00:13:35
So your vision is really your guardrails to make sure that you are on the right track to fulfill your mission, to reach your goals in the specific way that you want to.
Katie McManus
00:13:47
Will it feel selfish sometimes?
Katie McManus
00:13:49
Absolutely.
Katie McManus
00:13:51
Will it feel like you're not doing enough in the world.
Katie McManus
00:13:53
Yeah, uh huh.
Katie McManus
00:13:54
I know that the world wants you to care about everything.
Katie McManus
00:13:57
I know the world wants you to care about your home, being beautiful and hungry children and ending war and being healthy.
Katie McManus
00:14:06
And yes, these are all worthy things to care about.
Katie McManus
00:14:09
And also, you are just one person.
Katie McManus
00:14:12
And depending on your beliefs, this could be your one shot at living this life.
Katie McManus
00:14:17
So full permission to just pick the one thing that you actually give a about and say no to all the rest, trusting that there are other people who will pick that one thing to care the most about.
Katie McManus
00:14:31
I get sucked into this too.
Katie McManus
00:14:33
I care about the environment, I care about women's rights.
Katie McManus
00:14:35
I care about a whole lot of things.
Katie McManus
00:14:37
And it's really easy to want to do work in all of them, but if I try to do work in all of them, I'm going to make barely any progress in all of them.
Katie McManus
00:14:46
But if I pick one and commit myself to it, I know I can have impact there.
Katie McManus
00:14:51
And I'm a firm believer that if we all just picked one thing that we wanted to have impact on, the world would be a far better place.
Katie McManus
00:15:00
And lastly, values.
Katie McManus
00:15:24
What are your values?
Katie McManus
00:15:26
I do this exercise with my clients sometimes and when you ask someone what their values are, they're like, well, integrity and creativity and this and that.
Katie McManus
00:15:35
And it's all like these buzzwordy things.
Katie McManus
00:15:38
That sure sound good, but is that actually your value?
Katie McManus
00:15:44
When we think of values and we think about our own personal values, I want you to think about when you are your worst, when you're angry and upset and feel resentful and feel like the world is out to get you.
Katie McManus
00:16:01
And I want you to look at the moments before that feeling hit what happened.
Katie McManus
00:16:05
Oftentimes our values are not things that we're particularly proud of.
Katie McManus
00:16:10
All my life, my family, friends have all teased me about being a control freak.
Katie McManus
00:16:15
And I'm not a control freak in everything.
Katie McManus
00:16:17
But there are certain things I like just so.
Katie McManus
00:16:21
And there are certain activities, situations where I really like being in charge.
Katie McManus
00:16:28
Pretty much.
Katie McManus
00:16:30
Until I was 29, I went to coach training.
Katie McManus
00:16:33
I saw this as the worst thing about me.
Katie McManus
00:16:36
I saw it as a part of me that I had to fix.
Katie McManus
00:16:38
I had to let go of it.
Katie McManus
00:16:39
It just wasn't serving me.
Katie McManus
00:16:41
It was something that I got judged about a lot and it wasn't great until I did a values exercise.
Katie McManus
00:16:48
My coach and I looked at this, he asked me a question, I was like, oh God, well, I'm such a control freak and I really need to fix that about myself.
Katie McManus
00:16:55
And he's like, are you a control freak, or do you have a value around control?
Katie McManus
00:17:00
Do you have a value around being the one who is accountable to the outcome?
Katie McManus
00:17:06
What happens when things are out of control?
Katie McManus
00:17:08
What does it make you feel?
Katie McManus
00:17:10
And for me, being in a situation that feels out of control makes me feel helpless, makes me feel like I'm a victim.
Katie McManus
00:17:16
Because often I can see, well, this is the one thing that we need to fix to make this better.
Katie McManus
00:17:20
And if I can't do that, I just feel like my hands are tied, and I hate that.
Katie McManus
00:17:26
I also have a value that I call labradoodle, because I can't think of any other way to describe it.
Katie McManus
00:17:32
And this value, and of course, this is not something that if you were to, like, list off what your values are, you'd say, oh, yeah, labradoodle.
Katie McManus
00:17:38
That's absolutely something that makes sense because you don't know what it means for me.
Katie McManus
00:17:42
Right.
Katie McManus
00:17:43
It might mean something completely different for you.
Katie McManus
00:17:45
For me, when I think of a labradoodle, I think of a being that is just endlessly happy and finds a fun way to do absolutely everything.
Katie McManus
00:17:54
I think of a being that is so confident that they deserve whatever they want, they will just beg for it.
Katie McManus
00:18:01
They will ask for it over and over and over and over again, especially if it involves cheese.
Katie McManus
00:18:06
There's no labradoodle out there who isn't convinced that they deserve belly rubs all day long, and they will be shameless in trying to get you to give it to them.
Katie McManus
00:18:15
And I think that's such a beautiful way to live your life, and it's such a beautiful way to see yourself as endlessly deserving of the things that you want and to do so in a way that is joyful for you and for everyone around you.
Katie McManus
00:18:30
I also think of how loving they are and how they make people feel seen and connected with.
Katie McManus
00:18:36
And for me, that's the only way I want to live my life.
Katie McManus
00:18:40
If I do anything, I want it to be with that kind of energy.
Katie McManus
00:18:44
These values are the things that when they're not true, when they're not happening, you are at your worst.
Katie McManus
00:18:52
And when you're at your worst, there's no way you're doing good work.
Katie McManus
00:18:55
There's no way you're taking action on the things that will help you achieve your mission.
Katie McManus
00:19:00
That's why they're so important.
Katie McManus
00:19:02
I want you to think of the goal that you have for yourself, and you probably have a goal in the back of your mind.
Katie McManus
00:19:07
It could be to make a million dollars it could be to buy your first house, could be to start a nonprofit.
Katie McManus
00:19:14
And before writing it down for 20, 25 or whenever you decide to start going towards this goal before you make it the end all, be all, I want you to do this practice.
Katie McManus
00:19:25
I want you to go through and look at your mission and establish it.
Katie McManus
00:19:29
I want you to write a vision of how you're going to do it, and I want you to get crystal fucking clear on your values, who you're going to be as you go for it, and then check back in on that goal.
Katie McManus
00:19:44
Does it fit?
Katie McManus
00:19:45
Because if it doesn't, you're never going to reach it, because it doesn't actually matter to you.
Katie McManus
00:19:51
It's just a goal that you thought sounded good.
Katie McManus
00:19:55
And if that happens, I want you to release it back into the sea to get caught by someone else.
Katie McManus
00:20:02
And I want you to go back to the drawing board and really figure out what the goal is that lines up with your mission and your vision and your values.
Katie McManus
00:20:10
Do you ever meet an old person and you talk to them and you walk away thinking, God, life just happened to them.
Katie McManus
00:20:21
It was like they got their arms stuck in the door of a bus and just got dragged along for the ride and had no choice and no say and just ended up here feeling disconnected from everything that they care about.
Katie McManus
00:20:35
Would it shock you to hear that most people who end up like that put their arm in the door of the bus on purpose?
Katie McManus
00:20:45
This is hard.
Katie McManus
00:20:47
Living your life on purpose, being the narrator of your own story, creating your own destiny.
Katie McManus
00:20:54
It's really hard work.
Katie McManus
00:20:56
It's scary work because there's a chance you'll fail.
Katie McManus
00:21:01
And this is something you care so deeply about.
Katie McManus
00:21:04
The potential for failure is absolutely terrifying.
Katie McManus
00:21:07
But there's a difference between the old person who life just happened to them and the old person who gave it their best, who lived life on purpose, who wrote their own story, who had a mission and did everything they possibly could to reach it.
Katie McManus
00:21:27
And even if they failed, they're a completely different person on their deathbed.
Katie McManus
00:21:33
They don't have any regrets because they know that they gave it their all.
Katie McManus
00:21:37
And that, my friend, is what I want for you.
Katie McManus
00:21:40
So stop being a weenie and go do it.
Katie McManus
00:21:45
The funniest conversation I have every week with my mom, it's like my mom's like, oh, your episode this week is really good.
Katie McManus
00:21:52
I just.
Katie McManus
00:21:53
I really liked this.
Katie McManus
00:21:54
And I'm like, cool.
Katie McManus
00:21:55
What was it about?
Katie McManus
00:21:56
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
00:00:18
Let's talk about your mission, vision and values.
Katie McManus
00:00:21
Hi, I'm Katie McManus, business strategist and money mindset coach.
Katie McManus
00:00:24
And welcome to the we have.
Katie McManus
00:00:26
If you're goal setting without doing this fundamental step, then you're basically setting yourself up for failure and you're wasting a ton of time.
Katie McManus
00:00:34
And I don't want that for you.
Katie McManus
00:00:36
I don't think you want that for you either.
Katie McManus
00:00:38
We are coming up on the new year and this is prime time for people to set some really big goals for the coming year.
Katie McManus
00:00:45
And if you want those goals to be possible, if you want to actually achieve some things in the coming year, then I recommend taking a few hours and doing a little exercise that everyone in branding and marketing knows.
Katie McManus
00:01:01
It's called mission, Vision, Values.
Katie McManus
00:01:06
Because we all know that a goal without a strong why doesn't end up happening.
Katie McManus
00:01:12
There was this one time when I was 25 years old and I was working at Equinox and we were in the presale office and I arrived to work and I think I was just feeling like bloated that day.
Katie McManus
00:01:20
So I turned to my coworkers, I was like, you know what?
Katie McManus
00:01:23
I'm going to give up.
Katie McManus
00:01:23
I'm going to give up bread.
Katie McManus
00:01:25
And if you know me, you know that bread is my all time favorite thing.
Katie McManus
00:01:29
I will just eat a loaf of bread without butter, without toasting it.
Katie McManus
00:01:33
Like nothing, nothing added, no cheese.
Katie McManus
00:01:35
I just love bread.
Katie McManus
00:01:37
And so I was like, you know what?
Katie McManus
00:01:38
I'm going to give up bread.
Katie McManus
00:01:39
And they were like, okay, like, unsure why I was announcing it to the room.
Katie McManus
00:01:44
And this is about like 9:30 or 10 in the morning.
Katie McManus
00:01:47
I went on lunch at around 11.
Katie McManus
00:01:50
I came back to the office around 11:30 and I had already eaten half a loaf of sourdough bread.
Katie McManus
00:01:55
And they looked at me with this massive loaf of bread in my hands and I was obviously chewing.
Katie McManus
00:02:01
They're like, I thought you were giving up bread.
Katie McManus
00:02:04
And I was like, well, it was too hard.
Katie McManus
00:02:05
I could just, I couldn't do it.
Katie McManus
00:02:06
I was thinking about bread too much.
Katie McManus
00:02:08
This is a great example of a shitty goal that has no solid.
Katie McManus
00:02:11
Why There was no science behind bread being the cause.
Katie McManus
00:02:15
For me feeling puffy, I didn't really need to lose weight.
Katie McManus
00:02:18
I don't know why I said I was going to give up bread.
Katie McManus
00:02:19
It was a stupid thing to do.
Katie McManus
00:02:21
I'm sorry.
Katie McManus
00:02:22
Bread.
Katie McManus
00:02:22
I will never do it again.
Katie McManus
00:02:23
We're besties.
Katie McManus
00:02:25
But it's a great example of why you need a solid.
Katie McManus
00:02:28
Why if you're going to reach A goal.
Katie McManus
00:02:29
About a year later, I made another goal of getting eight hours of sleep a night.
Katie McManus
00:02:35
And this was my New Year's resolution.
Katie McManus
00:02:37
I think I was like 26 years old.
Katie McManus
00:02:40
And my why was I was unhappy.
Katie McManus
00:02:44
My why was I knew I wasn't being healthy.
Katie McManus
00:02:48
There were things about my lifestyle that I just wasn't into anymore.
Katie McManus
00:02:51
And I really wanted to do something for myself to make myself feel better.
Katie McManus
00:02:56
And I knew that stealing sleep from myself all the time, burning the candle at both ends was not serving me.
Katie McManus
00:03:03
And I came up with a very specific plan.
Katie McManus
00:03:05
That I would be in bed with all my electronics off by 9pm every single night for at least three months.
Katie McManus
00:03:12
And that even if I couldn't fall asleep, I would just lay there and let myself rest in the silence and in the dark.
Katie McManus
00:03:20
That goal I was massively successful with.
Katie McManus
00:03:24
That goal actually changed my life because with all that extra sleep, I was able to get clear on the things that were working and not working for me in my life.
Katie McManus
00:03:33
And it allowed me to really see what it was I wanted instead.
Katie McManus
00:03:36
And not just that, start planning to get it.
Katie McManus
00:03:40
If you need ideas for a good New Year's resolution, I can't recommend this one enough.
Katie McManus
00:03:44
Now, of course, these are just small goals.
Katie McManus
00:03:47
They're not the goal for your life.
Katie McManus
00:03:49
A small goal is far easier to reach than your big life goals.
Katie McManus
00:03:55
I want you to think back on, like when you told yourself you were going to do something for 30 days in a row or 100 days in a row, how hard was it?
Katie McManus
00:04:04
How many days did you want to quit?
Katie McManus
00:04:06
And what kept you accountable to doing it?
Katie McManus
00:04:09
Was it social pressure?
Katie McManus
00:04:11
Was it you had a really great.
Katie McManus
00:04:12
Why?
Katie McManus
00:04:13
Was it fear of failing?
Katie McManus
00:04:14
Was it that, like that sensation of wanting to feel proud of yourself for accomplishing something?
Katie McManus
00:04:21
All of those are really incredible tools to use when you have a short goal.
Katie McManus
00:04:26
But when we're thinking about the mission, the goal we want to have for our life, the impact we want to have, the amount of money we want to make, how we want to spend our time, it's way longer than 30 days, my friend.
Katie McManus
00:04:41
These kinds of things happen over years, over decades.
Katie McManus
00:04:45
How are you going to keep yourself in the game for that?
Katie McManus
00:04:48
Well, I'm about to tell you.
Katie McManus
00:04:50
So let me break down what these things mean.
Katie McManus
00:04:55
So your mission is the big, audacious, juicy goal that you have for your life.
Katie McManus
00:05:02
What's the thing you want to accomplish, the impact you want to have in the world where a lot of people get hung up when they think about their mission is they Think it has to be holier than thou.
Katie McManus
00:05:14
It has to be something that's good for everyone else and saves the world and is good for the environment and this and that and the other thing.
Katie McManus
00:05:22
And like, sure, if you want it to be that, if it actually is that, if your main driver is you want to make sure that no child is hungry ever, then cool.
Katie McManus
00:05:33
That can be the mission for your life.
Katie McManus
00:05:35
But if you're just saying that because you think it sounds good and it sounds altruistic and it makes you a good person, it's not your mission.
Katie McManus
00:05:45
You see, every one of those motivations for that being your mission is external.
Katie McManus
00:05:50
It's what other people think.
Katie McManus
00:05:52
This is where a lot of people get their mission for their life wrong is they think, oh, my gosh, okay, well, here's my time to shine.
Katie McManus
00:06:00
Here's my time to prove how good a person I am, how worthy I am of love and respect and attention.
Katie McManus
00:06:09
And let me tell you, if whenever you do something to show other people how worthy and deserving you are, it never works.
Katie McManus
00:06:17
Because if you're surrounded with people who are already withholding love and making you feel like you're worthy and deserving of their respect, guess what?
Katie McManus
00:06:26
There's no changing that.
Katie McManus
00:06:28
They're not the right people to have in your life.
Katie McManus
00:06:31
And love and worthiness and deserving are not things that you can ever earn.
Katie McManus
00:06:35
They're just things that you have inherently.
Katie McManus
00:06:38
So let yourself off the hook for the missions that sound good.
Katie McManus
00:06:43
Your mission can be that you want to make people laugh.
Katie McManus
00:06:46
Your mission can be that you feel at home in your body.
Katie McManus
00:06:50
Your mission can absolutely be about ending homelessness.
Katie McManus
00:06:55
But the reason why you want to end homelessness has to be about you.
Katie McManus
00:07:01
Has to be about the impact you want to have for yourself.
Katie McManus
00:07:06
What's the feeling of pride?
Katie McManus
00:07:08
And I know there's a lot of people who are like, well, pride, Isn't that a bad thing?
Katie McManus
00:07:12
Absolutely F not.
Katie McManus
00:07:14
Pride is just like money.
Katie McManus
00:07:17
If you're a good person, you're going to be proud of the good things you do.
Katie McManus
00:07:21
If you're a bad person, you're going to be proud of the bad things you did and got away with.
Katie McManus
00:07:27
I'll hazard guess if you're listening to this podcast, you're probably a pretty good person.
Katie McManus
00:07:32
So you're not going to go and pour a bunch of barrels of oil into the local pond and feel really proud that you killed all the animals.
Katie McManus
00:07:41
And if you are that kind of person, please stop listening right now and go seek help and remember that this is your personal mission.
Katie McManus
00:07:50
This is the mission for your life.
Katie McManus
00:07:52
You can have a different mission for, say, your business or a nonprofit that you establish.
Katie McManus
00:07:59
One of the reasons why this topic actually came up for me, and I wanted to talk about it on this podcast, is I recently did this exercise with the other executives for the Gay Birthday Club, which is a nonprofit I just started.
Katie McManus
00:08:10
And our mission for the nonprofit is very, very different from my personal mission in my life.
Katie McManus
00:08:18
And I'll use it as an example to show you what you can make your mission for your business or your nonprofit.
Katie McManus
00:08:24
So at the Gay Birthday Club, we believe that everyone deserves a cringey, love filled, embarrassing birthday phone call from their family.
Katie McManus
00:08:33
Welcome to the Gay Birthday Club in an all inclusive organization committed to bringing joy to members of the LGBTQIA community to celebrate their birthdays.
Katie McManus
00:08:43
Choose us as your family.
Katie McManus
00:08:45
All the love, none of the political arguments on the holidays.
Katie McManus
00:08:48
That's a beautiful mission for that nonprofit that wants to have that impact, but that's not my personal mission.
Katie McManus
00:08:55
I deeply want you to spend some time reflecting on what you want.
Katie McManus
00:09:03
And I want you to think about when you're old and maybe decrepit, can't get around very easily, and you're on your deathbed and there are people around crying.
Katie McManus
00:09:11
I want you to think about who would you regret not being in your life if you got to the end of your life and you just, you didn't do this?
Katie McManus
00:09:22
That gets to be your mission.
Katie McManus
00:09:23
It gets to be selfish.
Katie McManus
00:09:25
It also gets to be a little vague because that's where your vision's gonna come in.
Katie McManus
00:10:20
Speaking of vision, let's talk about what this can be for you.
Katie McManus
00:10:23
So your vision is aligned with your mission, but instead of it being like the what you wanna accomplish, it's the how you're gonna do it.
Katie McManus
00:10:33
So, again, for example, the Gay Birthday Club, our mission is very clear.
Katie McManus
00:10:39
We stand for everyone in the LGBTQIA community getting a cringy, love filled birthday call on their birthday.
Katie McManus
00:10:47
Our vision is that we will be the ones to call them.
Katie McManus
00:10:52
If they don't already get that call from family.
Katie McManus
00:10:55
We will be their family.
Katie McManus
00:10:57
Not only that, but we want to have a greater impact.
Katie McManus
00:10:59
So we do fundraising so that we can, A, keep our operations going and B, give grants to organizations that are doing more serious work supporting the LGBTQ community.
Katie McManus
00:11:13
There are a few other things that we want to do.
Katie McManus
00:11:15
We'll be adding to this vision as we grow the organization, but this is where you get to get really specific about how you're going to enact your Mission.
Katie McManus
00:11:23
Say your mission is all about making people laugh, because you just enjoy being in a room where there's always laughter happening.
Katie McManus
00:11:30
That's what lights you up.
Katie McManus
00:11:32
That's what makes you feel good and warm and loved.
Katie McManus
00:11:34
Part of your vision could be hanging out with comedians.
Katie McManus
00:11:38
It could be you join book clubs where people read funny novels.
Katie McManus
00:11:43
It could be that you take an improv class or a standup comedian class.
Katie McManus
00:11:48
It could be that you don't take life so seriously.
Katie McManus
00:11:51
The important thing about really digging into your vision is that it keeps you on the tracks to reach the big goal.
Katie McManus
00:12:01
Because if your mission for your life is to always have laughter, part of that vision doesn't necessarily mean gardening.
Katie McManus
00:12:08
Like, you're going to garden all the time.
Katie McManus
00:12:10
It can be a hobby you have, but it's not necessarily going to be your life's work.
Katie McManus
00:12:14
Right.
Katie McManus
00:12:14
It doesn't really land there.
Katie McManus
00:12:15
When you're working towards this goal of creating life that you want, you're not going to look at that part of your life or that hobby as part.
Katie McManus
00:12:24
So, for example, for the Gay Birthday Club, our mission is pretty clear and our vision kind of breaks down how we're going to do it.
Katie McManus
00:12:32
It wouldn't quite fit for us to also have that we do beach cleanups, right?
Katie McManus
00:12:36
Because there's no clear correlation between a beach cleanup and making sure that folks in the LGBTQ community get cringy, love filled calls on their birthday.
Katie McManus
00:12:46
There's no clear correlation between taking plastic out of the environment and supporting this community.
Katie McManus
00:12:53
Now, they're both amazing things to do.
Katie McManus
00:12:55
You know, if you have some free time and a garbage bag and some gloves, I recommend you go down to the beach and do a beach cleanup at any point.
Katie McManus
00:13:02
Pretty much every beach needs it.
Katie McManus
00:13:03
But just like in a nonprofit setting, it would be really easy to be like, oh, well, that's a good thing to do.
Katie McManus
00:13:08
We're a nonprofit.
Katie McManus
00:13:09
We do good things.
Katie McManus
00:13:09
I could absolutely have everyone do this.
Katie McManus
00:13:12
It doesn't quite make sense.
Katie McManus
00:13:14
Not on brand.
Katie McManus
00:13:15
And remember, we're not living our lives for everyone else.
Katie McManus
00:13:19
We're not living our lives to impress other people about what good people we are.
Katie McManus
00:13:23
You are living your life so that when you get to your deathbed, you will have no regrets.
Katie McManus
00:13:29
A big regret that people have is around getting distracted from what they want.
Katie McManus
00:13:35
So your vision is really your guardrails to make sure that you are on the right track to fulfill your mission, to reach your goals in the specific way that you want to.
Katie McManus
00:13:47
Will it feel selfish sometimes?
Katie McManus
00:13:49
Absolutely.
Katie McManus
00:13:51
Will it feel like you're not doing enough in the world.
Katie McManus
00:13:53
Yeah, uh huh.
Katie McManus
00:13:54
I know that the world wants you to care about everything.
Katie McManus
00:13:57
I know the world wants you to care about your home, being beautiful and hungry children and ending war and being healthy.
Katie McManus
00:14:06
And yes, these are all worthy things to care about.
Katie McManus
00:14:09
And also, you are just one person.
Katie McManus
00:14:12
And depending on your beliefs, this could be your one shot at living this life.
Katie McManus
00:14:17
So full permission to just pick the one thing that you actually give a about and say no to all the rest, trusting that there are other people who will pick that one thing to care the most about.
Katie McManus
00:14:31
I get sucked into this too.
Katie McManus
00:14:33
I care about the environment, I care about women's rights.
Katie McManus
00:14:35
I care about a whole lot of things.
Katie McManus
00:14:37
And it's really easy to want to do work in all of them, but if I try to do work in all of them, I'm going to make barely any progress in all of them.
Katie McManus
00:14:46
But if I pick one and commit myself to it, I know I can have impact there.
Katie McManus
00:14:51
And I'm a firm believer that if we all just picked one thing that we wanted to have impact on, the world would be a far better place.
Katie McManus
00:15:00
And lastly, values.
Katie McManus
00:15:24
What are your values?
Katie McManus
00:15:26
I do this exercise with my clients sometimes and when you ask someone what their values are, they're like, well, integrity and creativity and this and that.
Katie McManus
00:15:35
And it's all like these buzzwordy things.
Katie McManus
00:15:38
That sure sound good, but is that actually your value?
Katie McManus
00:15:44
When we think of values and we think about our own personal values, I want you to think about when you are your worst, when you're angry and upset and feel resentful and feel like the world is out to get you.
Katie McManus
00:16:01
And I want you to look at the moments before that feeling hit what happened.
Katie McManus
00:16:05
Oftentimes our values are not things that we're particularly proud of.
Katie McManus
00:16:10
All my life, my family, friends have all teased me about being a control freak.
Katie McManus
00:16:15
And I'm not a control freak in everything.
Katie McManus
00:16:17
But there are certain things I like just so.
Katie McManus
00:16:21
And there are certain activities, situations where I really like being in charge.
Katie McManus
00:16:28
Pretty much.
Katie McManus
00:16:30
Until I was 29, I went to coach training.
Katie McManus
00:16:33
I saw this as the worst thing about me.
Katie McManus
00:16:36
I saw it as a part of me that I had to fix.
Katie McManus
00:16:38
I had to let go of it.
Katie McManus
00:16:39
It just wasn't serving me.
Katie McManus
00:16:41
It was something that I got judged about a lot and it wasn't great until I did a values exercise.
Katie McManus
00:16:48
My coach and I looked at this, he asked me a question, I was like, oh God, well, I'm such a control freak and I really need to fix that about myself.
Katie McManus
00:16:55
And he's like, are you a control freak, or do you have a value around control?
Katie McManus
00:17:00
Do you have a value around being the one who is accountable to the outcome?
Katie McManus
00:17:06
What happens when things are out of control?
Katie McManus
00:17:08
What does it make you feel?
Katie McManus
00:17:10
And for me, being in a situation that feels out of control makes me feel helpless, makes me feel like I'm a victim.
Katie McManus
00:17:16
Because often I can see, well, this is the one thing that we need to fix to make this better.
Katie McManus
00:17:20
And if I can't do that, I just feel like my hands are tied, and I hate that.
Katie McManus
00:17:26
I also have a value that I call labradoodle, because I can't think of any other way to describe it.
Katie McManus
00:17:32
And this value, and of course, this is not something that if you were to, like, list off what your values are, you'd say, oh, yeah, labradoodle.
Katie McManus
00:17:38
That's absolutely something that makes sense because you don't know what it means for me.
Katie McManus
00:17:42
Right.
Katie McManus
00:17:43
It might mean something completely different for you.
Katie McManus
00:17:45
For me, when I think of a labradoodle, I think of a being that is just endlessly happy and finds a fun way to do absolutely everything.
Katie McManus
00:17:54
I think of a being that is so confident that they deserve whatever they want, they will just beg for it.
Katie McManus
00:18:01
They will ask for it over and over and over and over again, especially if it involves cheese.
Katie McManus
00:18:06
There's no labradoodle out there who isn't convinced that they deserve belly rubs all day long, and they will be shameless in trying to get you to give it to them.
Katie McManus
00:18:15
And I think that's such a beautiful way to live your life, and it's such a beautiful way to see yourself as endlessly deserving of the things that you want and to do so in a way that is joyful for you and for everyone around you.
Katie McManus
00:18:30
I also think of how loving they are and how they make people feel seen and connected with.
Katie McManus
00:18:36
And for me, that's the only way I want to live my life.
Katie McManus
00:18:40
If I do anything, I want it to be with that kind of energy.
Katie McManus
00:18:44
These values are the things that when they're not true, when they're not happening, you are at your worst.
Katie McManus
00:18:52
And when you're at your worst, there's no way you're doing good work.
Katie McManus
00:18:55
There's no way you're taking action on the things that will help you achieve your mission.
Katie McManus
00:19:00
That's why they're so important.
Katie McManus
00:19:02
I want you to think of the goal that you have for yourself, and you probably have a goal in the back of your mind.
Katie McManus
00:19:07
It could be to make a million dollars it could be to buy your first house, could be to start a nonprofit.
Katie McManus
00:19:14
And before writing it down for 20, 25 or whenever you decide to start going towards this goal before you make it the end all, be all, I want you to do this practice.
Katie McManus
00:19:25
I want you to go through and look at your mission and establish it.
Katie McManus
00:19:29
I want you to write a vision of how you're going to do it, and I want you to get crystal fucking clear on your values, who you're going to be as you go for it, and then check back in on that goal.
Katie McManus
00:19:44
Does it fit?
Katie McManus
00:19:45
Because if it doesn't, you're never going to reach it, because it doesn't actually matter to you.
Katie McManus
00:19:51
It's just a goal that you thought sounded good.
Katie McManus
00:19:55
And if that happens, I want you to release it back into the sea to get caught by someone else.
Katie McManus
00:20:02
And I want you to go back to the drawing board and really figure out what the goal is that lines up with your mission and your vision and your values.
Katie McManus
00:20:10
Do you ever meet an old person and you talk to them and you walk away thinking, God, life just happened to them.
Katie McManus
00:20:21
It was like they got their arms stuck in the door of a bus and just got dragged along for the ride and had no choice and no say and just ended up here feeling disconnected from everything that they care about.
Katie McManus
00:20:35
Would it shock you to hear that most people who end up like that put their arm in the door of the bus on purpose?
Katie McManus
00:20:45
This is hard.
Katie McManus
00:20:47
Living your life on purpose, being the narrator of your own story, creating your own destiny.
Katie McManus
00:20:54
It's really hard work.
Katie McManus
00:20:56
It's scary work because there's a chance you'll fail.
Katie McManus
00:21:01
And this is something you care so deeply about.
Katie McManus
00:21:04
The potential for failure is absolutely terrifying.
Katie McManus
00:21:07
But there's a difference between the old person who life just happened to them and the old person who gave it their best, who lived life on purpose, who wrote their own story, who had a mission and did everything they possibly could to reach it.
Katie McManus
00:21:27
And even if they failed, they're a completely different person on their deathbed.
Katie McManus
00:21:33
They don't have any regrets because they know that they gave it their all.
Katie McManus
00:21:37
And that, my friend, is what I want for you.
Katie McManus
00:21:40
So stop being a weenie and go do it.
Katie McManus
00:21:45
The funniest conversation I have every week with my mom, it's like my mom's like, oh, your episode this week is really good.
Katie McManus
00:21:52
I just.
Katie McManus
00:21:53
I really liked this.
Katie McManus
00:21:54
And I'm like, cool.
Katie McManus
00:21:55
What was it about?
Katie McManus
00:21:56
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
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