TRANSKRIPT 🔗
WEBVTT
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Hey man, check it out, Perry Sand in here.
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I just watched Maven do a video about things you should never say to a wrestler.
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Well, I'm gonna tell you some things you should never do to a wrestler.
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And I know it's so similar to Maven.
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Get the fuck over it because my opinion's gonna be totally different than his.
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Okay, man.
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So the first thing you should never do, and I would think it's common sense, but you can't believe how many times it happens.
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Never challenge a wrestler to a fight.
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Okay, so I'm trying to figure a good story to keep you entertained.
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And what put comes to mind one night in Lafayette when I was in uh WCW, some drunken idiot tried to start a fight with Sonny Ono.
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I guess he figured that Sonny was the smallest guy there, and it'd uh be safer that way.
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But he didn't realize that uh I I have this team mentality, Sonny's on my team, so I immediately grabbed this stupid pucker and choke him out.
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I got him down on the floor and I'm choking him, and all the boys start pouring drinks on me.
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I had a$400 shirt on, and these idiots are ruining it with all these fucking drinks.
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I wanted to kill everyone that night.
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But that's that's one time I remembered them still, you know, just he wanted to fight Sonny, and it's so, and Sonny's a black belt, you know, karate champion, he'd have probably kicked his ass anyways.
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Okay, the next thing you should never do, and that's jump the barricade and run into the ring.
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First of all, you're gonna get arrested.
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And that's gonna happen after you get your ass kicked.
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And if you're too fast and the refslers can't get you, the rep will.
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And look back at uh some WCW stuff with Brian Hildegram, beat the hell on the background, he'll whoop your ass too.
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Okay, the next thing you should never do, kind of, maybe an asterisk after it, never throw things into the ring.
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Okay, never throw something that's gonna hurt somebody like a can of beer or like a golf ball or something, like Brian Hildegram, the referee, got hit in the head with a golf ball, got knocked out.
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I remember when me and Benlo worked against the New Jersey Chiyad, Paige was so great at getting heat.
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The ring would be filled with soda uh cups and shit, uh, which made us know we did our job good, you know.
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The downside is I was a babyface, I'm the Matt Stelling, so that you guys were throwing all that shit on top of me, getting me all sticky and stuff.
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But stuff like that, the boys liked it, you know, when they got the crowd where they want them.
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But uh never throw something that's gonna hurt somebody, right?
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Common sense.
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I think they teach you that in kindergarten.
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Okay, men, the next thing that you should never do, and that's approach a wrestler while they're in the restroom.
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Kind of your private time, right?
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And let's be honest, half of you guys are nasty motherfuckers, and I know you're pissing all over your fingers and shit, and you want to shake my hand after you just did that?
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Bullshit.
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Wait till I'm outside, wait till we both got our hands washed.
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I I John Cena, I seen, uh, I think it was John Cena, tell the story he was on the toilet in the stall.
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Some guy sat outside the stall waiting for them to finish.
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Come on, that's ridiculous.
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Okay, the next thing that you should never do is have a stack of eight by tens and want one wrestler to sign all these so you can sell them later and make money on your own.
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You're basically pimping me out so you can make money, and that's bullshit.
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Uh, we would do uh, I think every five weeks or something in uh in WCW, we'd go down to Kissimmee for two weeks.
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And when we'd fly into Orlando, this guy who owned a memorabilia shop knew we would be there and he'd stand on top of the where the planes come, uh, right at the top where you got to go down two flights of escalators to get your luggage.
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He'd have stacks of eight by tens of everybody, and we keep telling them not to do it.
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I used to be a little high strung.
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So then one day I went through there and I grabbed them and I threw them fuckers as far as I could, and they all came down like cavettians.
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Yeah, but but and that was the last time he ever did that.
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Fucking give us a little space of ourselves and don't try to make money off of us.
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Okay, the next thing that you should never do is approach a wrestler in a strip club.
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I'm gonna get crude for a second, but are you there to see me or are you there to see pussy?
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Come on.
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There's no reason to bother me while the girls are on stage.
Load full transcript
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You're taking you're making them look bad, and then you're gonna get heat.
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I'm gonna get heat with them because of your dumb ass.
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So in the strip club, leave me alone.
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Okay, the next thing you should never do is show up at a wrestler's hotel room or for God's sake his house.
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And I've had both happen to me.
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And I guarantee it was not a pleasant meeting when that happened.
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In my hotel rooms, two guys woke me up about seven in the morning after I was out all night partying, pounding on my door.
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I opened my door, I thought it was security or something.
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Hi, Perry Satuo, which is another thing.
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You don't call me by my real fucking name.
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You don't know me.
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So, but hey, can you sign the?
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I went off, called, screamed at him, would have chased them down the hallway.
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The idiots who uh came to my house, I had two pit bolts, I just let my dogs out.
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Because you don't go to somebody's house, I'll never come to your house.
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Some guys who are my really close friends, I've never been to their house and they've never been to mine.
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Leave that personal space alone, man.
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The next thing we should never do, and I think it's common sense manners, but don't approach them and interrupt them while they're eating.
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We're running from morning to night a lot of times, some of it our own activity, but we're running, we eat when we can.
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In uh Baltimore, me and Dean and uh Chris were eating, and this woman and her kid came up to the table and had all this shit for us to sign.
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And I ask her, I go, okay, can you please wait till we're done?
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And she tells me, No, I bought tickets to the show.
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You fuckers have to do this.
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That's a horrible attitude to have.
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I had explained to this young man that his mother was a cunt and they were gonna have to leave because of her.
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Just let us eat, man.
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Guys like Paige, he'll sign every fucking thing you bring, but let him eat.
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I'll do the best I can.
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Sometimes I get impatient.
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But let me eat because I'm never gonna sign shit while I'm eating.
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Okay, the last thing you should never do, and again, I think this is all common sense.
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It's making my fucking brain hurt going over this stuff, but I know some of you don't get it.
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Never interrupt them when they're with their family.
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We travel all the time.
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I was gone more than I was home.
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Most of the years wrestling, I was on the road over 300 days a year.
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So I wasn't with my family that much.
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So I'm trying to have family time, and uh you're you're being unreasonable.
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It's just nuts, man.
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Uh, I was at Six Flags with my son and when he was a little kid uh a long time ago, and Ernest Miller happened to be there with his son.
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And uh we so we started going through rides together.
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This woman came up to us with a stack of stuff to sign, and we're standing in line.
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I go, we're in line just like you are.
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We don't have any special treatment.
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You can we'll sign it after we're done.
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She went and got um the park security and wanted us thrown out for not signing stuff because her kid was a really big wrestling fan.
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Shit like that.
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I know a lot of times you don't mean to have it be shitty, but you know, you what is the saying?
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Uh you mean well, and that's not a compliment.
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That means you're a fucking idiot, and I'm doing the best I can to tolerate you.
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Okay, man.
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I know that list was kind of really similar to Maven's, and some of you are having a hissy fit.
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Well, it'll be alright.
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The next video will be different, probably.
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Now, I really appreciate you guys watching these videos.
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And if you can hit like and subscribe if you haven't, you'll you'll enable me to keep doing these videos.
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And if you don't like watching the videos, stop coming to the fucking channel.