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Welcome to the Shake Up Podcast.
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I'm Candace Harvey.
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It's me.
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I am a speaker.
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I'm an author.
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I'm a workshop facilitator.
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And I'm also known as a people shaker.
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Hence why, you know, the Shake Up Podcast, the Shake Up Book.
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I just I just really rolled with it, you know.
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But if you don't know, I spent 15 years in HR prior to having my business.
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In 2018, I actually started my business, but with a simple switch.
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I actually stopped helping companies manage their people and I started helping people manage themselves because I get it.
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Working life in 2026 is a lot, peeps.
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It's a lot.
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It is meetings that rob you of 45 minutes that you're never getting back.
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It's an inbox that is relentless.
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It is personalities that have you deep breathing, in through the nose, out through the mouth, in through the nose, out through the mouth.
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And that 3 p.m.
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crash that hits like clockwork.
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And no, I don't think quitting is the answer.
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However, I do know that shaking things up every now and again absolutely is.
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So if you are here for a nudge, a reset, or a loving kick up the cute little tush, you're in the right place.
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Now, lately I keep hearing the same things from people.
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You know, when you go through stages of that where you're just like, is everyone saying the same thing?
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It's like, you know, when someone gets a cold and then all of a sudden everyone's got a cold and it's going round.
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Yeah, it's one of those things.
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But what I keep hearing from people lately is like, I can't switch off from work.
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I never feel like I'm on top of anything and I am, I am pooped.
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And I want to be really clear.
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I want to basically clear something up before we get into how to change that.
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Because I am going to talk about that with the really how do I actually switch off from work.
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Um, but the thing is that switching off from work gets really misunderstood because switching off from work isn't actually, you know, it's needed because you hate your job and you love the rest of your life.
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So focus on the good and ignore the bad bit, right?
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But switching off from work is not really important because work is draining or the worst part of your life.
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It's important to learn how to switch off from your nine to five because work is only one part of your life.
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Yes, it is a big part and one that can ripple into everything else that you've got going on, which is why I focus on it so heavily.
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But you've also got your family, you've got your friends, you've got your hobbies, you've got your health, you've got your intimacy, your downtime.
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And if you can't switch off from work, none of that other stuff gets a real turn.
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None of it.
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And I get it.
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You know, as a business owner myself, some nights I feel like I work in my sleep.
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I know that sounds weird, and I I try and articulate this to people sometimes, and they go, no, I get that.
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But I'm not joking.
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Like I have dreamt that I was sitting at my desk working.
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Like I have dreamt that I have been mid-workshop, like in front of a room, and it all feels completely real.
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And then you wake up and you have to remind yourself that I wasn't actually meant to be at work last night, you know?
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But our brains are super weird like that.
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Like I don't, I don't understand dreams.
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I I wish I understood them.
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I don't know if anyone understands them, right?
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Like, how do you, how do you investigate that?
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How do you research dreams?
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Anyway, I'm sure there are people out there, very smart people.
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I don't get dreams, but they feel very real and sometimes they are also super exhausting.
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Like you wake up exhausted because of your dream.
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Like I was working all night, you know?
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Ridiculous.
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But honestly, if I didn't have a sexy husband who walks through that door around 5 p.m.
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Monday to Friday, I don't think I'd ever stop working.
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And I mean it because I love this stuff.
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Like the content, the writing book number two, which I'm doing at the moment, but brainstorming new workshops for teams, mapping out a new podcast series, especially for businesses.
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Yeah, you heard that right.
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Oh my God, I'm so excited.
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Coming soon.
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Load full transcript
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But even contacting new clients, old clients, like the list never ends for me.
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And here's the thing: that list never ends whether you run a business or you work in a job.
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We are all the same in that respect.
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Like, no one is better for having a bigger work-to-do list.
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We all have mammoth ones.
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Let's not compare, shall we?
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I was about to say keep it in your pants.
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So inappropriate.
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But I want us to retire the idea that working yourself into the ground is something to be impressed by.
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You know, like long hours, seven days a week.
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That's not a flex to me.
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It's boring.
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Like the actual wow moment for me, like the real skill, the real impressive trait that I see in high performers is being exceptional in your nine to five and showing up fully in your five to nine.
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Because if you're amazing at your job and you're pooped, the second you clock off, you're doing it wrong.
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Like you're actually doing life wrong.
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And if you're crushing it at work, but your evenings and weekends are spent half watching a show that you're not even into while your brain is still at your desk, something needs to change.
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So today, five ways to actually switch off your nine to five so that you can switch on your five to nine.
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And I want you to think about what would happen for you if you could actually switch off your nine to five, meaning leaving all the thinking and planning and doing of your job to take place when you're at work.
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Can you imagine?
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So when you're not at work, you're at home or you're having fun, whatever that looks like for you.
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But if you weren't thinking about work from five to nine and then 5 p.m.
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you go to bed.
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Like that's the idea here, right?
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Like in bed, asleep, like Candace Harvey is.
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What does your five to nine look like if you're not thinking about work?
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What do you think about instead?
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What do you do if you're not feeling like you have to keep working?
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And sometimes this is actually the hardest part.
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Because if people don't have anything else to do except work, then they're gonna work.
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And I think that this is something that is very misunderstood.
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This is something that is definitely not thought about enough because people will tell themselves, I love what I do, I love my job, I love working at all hours.
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I, yep, okay, cool to a point.
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But also, have you actually thought about what you want to do if you weren't working all the time?
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And the answer is typically no.
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And sometimes this can really dig up some pretty uncomfortable things, like maybe I should be working on my relationship with my wife or my husband.
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Maybe I should be actually getting out there and meeting new people because I actually feel quite lonely.
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Maybe I should be exploring a different way that I can use my hands or have my creative outlet because I used to do all this and now all I do is work.
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But it requires a lot more thinking.
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And it can, what's said is said on the tin, it can shake things up.
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Like I actually talk about this in my book, The Shake Up, available on Amazon and Audible.
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It's like I can't say that last bit without like it just feels weird to say the shakeup book, because this could be the first episode you've ever heard.
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This could be the first time you heard that I have a book, right?
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I do.
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Candace Harvey wrote a book this year.
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It is available on Amazon and Audible.
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If you just write in The Shake Up by Candace Harvey, it's it's all yours.
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You are so welcome.
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But in this book, I actually share a story about how I ran a workshop to a bunch of travel agents.
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I love telling this story because it brings it all back for me.
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And it was such a huge moment.
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It really, I mean, I guess it did shake me up, but it really brought so much to light for me.
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But I was running this workshop for a bunch of travel agents and I asked everyone there, what do you guys do for fun?
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And they were on a retreat, right?
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So they were all having a really great time.
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They'd have a they'd had a really big night the night before.
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Some of them were a bit dusty, but they were excited for the session.
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I remember actually saying to the manager who got me in, I'm like, so they all had a big night last night.
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Oh, cool.
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And now they get me for a couple of hours.
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Brilliant.
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And I remember her literally saying to me, She's like, Oh, Candace, this is what they do.
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They're travel agents.
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Like they party hard, work hard.
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And she wasn't wrong.
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She absolutely wasn't wrong.
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They loved the session, and the ripple effect of work for me was so cool.
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Like I ended up doing quite a bit of work with all of these people individually for their for their teams.
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Anyway, I digress.
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The point is they were switched on.
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They were loving this workshop.
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But when I said to everyone, like, what do you guys do for fun?
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The response that I got blew me away.
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I got tears, ladies and gents.
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Like water from their eyes.
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Not one person, not two people.
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There was like three or four people who were emotional in this group, like actual people crying.
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I was confused.
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Like I was also worried that I'd never be asked back ever again.
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I was worried I'd be getting the worst Google reviews in history.
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However, when I asked, like, what was coming up for the people that were getting emotional, they said, Candace, as travel agents, we work so much we actually don't have time for fun.
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And they were super emotional about it, like it hit them in the face.
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And I said to them, but if you did have time for fun, what would that look like?
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And no one could answer it.
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So, okay, they're not having fun, but if you did have time, what would you do?
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And they didn't know.
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You can't have fun if you don't know what fun looks like to you.
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That's step number one.
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So, yes, I'm gonna help you switch off today in your nine to five.
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Not today, in this podcast episode today.
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You get it?
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Yeah, you totally get what I'm putting down.
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I'm gonna help you do that from nine to five.
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I want you to switch off from it so that you can actually enjoy your five to nine in this episode today.
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However, your job after this and after you crush these five steps is to work out what I am gonna do outside of work hours now.
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This is actually part of the five steps.
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I'm getting ahead of myself, but that's okay.
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I get really excited, haven't even started.
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So uh let's get into it.
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Actually, now that I've I've just digressed myself, I don't know if that's a real sentence, I got a message from a friend of mine this week who listens to every single episode of the Shake Up Podcast.
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I think I remember like eight, I don't know, 18 months ago, she even said to me, because we were talking about the podcast, and I'm pretty sure, Jodie, I'm talking to you, uh, about you, not to you, that'd be weird.
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Um, but I actually said to her, you should listen to the podcast.
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And I'm pretty sure, Jodie, you said you don't listen to podcasts.
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And now all of a sudden, come Monday, she gets it into her ear holes and she likes to message me about it afterwards, which is really, really cool.
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But she messaged me this week, Jodie, I've already given her name away, um, and she said that she feels like she gets a real Candace Harvey dose weekly, which is lovely, and she also realizes it's not reciprocated because I don't really hear what's going on from her, uh, but she kind of hears from me every single week, which is really, really lovely.
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But she said that she loves it when I go rogue in my episodes because she said it feels like we are literally catching up for coffee and I've just gone off on a tangent, which I sometimes do.
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So you're welcome.
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I'm glad that you enjoy that because as we know, if this was something that was edited, like I used to get with the Shake Up podcast, Georgia would probably have taken that out and be like, oh, you kind of went off track there a little bit.
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But because it's not edited, you're welcome.
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You get all of it.
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Anyway, five ways to actually switch off your nine to five so you can switch on your five to nine.
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Did that actually make sense?
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I think it did.
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Five ways to actually switch off your nine to five so you can switch on your five to nine.
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Yeah, I want you to switch on.
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Yeah, that totally makes sense.
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Okay, number one, the first step, if you are interested in doing this, is reflect and reset.
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Now, what I mean by that is switching off from your nine to five actually happens in your nine to five, not when you get home.
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It starts at work and it starts by reflecting and resetting, meaning I want you to take time on a Friday if you're wanting to
switch off for the weekend, or take time each afternoon if you're wanting to switch off every five to nine, which is the point as well.
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But I want you to do a big one on the weekend because I know that the amount of people that I actually speak to, it is actually the weekends that they struggle to switch off from.
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And I've only been speaking to one of my clients about this just recently.
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That is what she struggles with the most because she almost gives herself like this permission slip that from Monday to Thursday, specifically, specifically, especially, wrong word there, uh, like it's kind of normal.
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It's like you're allowed to think about work.
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Like we're in the work week, like that's totally okay.
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I still don't want you to, to be honest.
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That's why this is called switching off so that you can enjoy your five to nine.
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However, especially on weekends, when you get to the end and then you can go into Saturday and Sunday, I want you to be enjoying your weekend, right?
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So this is something, this step especially, that do every day.
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Please do this every day, but especially do it on a Friday so that you go into your weekend switching off.
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But what I want you to do from a reflect and reset perspective, I want you to look back on what you've done that day or that week, like what you have achieved, what you have ticked off.
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And I want you to get really, really clear, right?
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So that's the first thing.
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It's looking at what you've achieved.
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Like, even right now, as I'm recording this episode, it is Thursday afternoon.
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And to think about what I had for breakfast.
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Oh no, I do know I had a piece of toast, which was delicious, but it can be really hard to think about what you have done.
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Like come Monday, I would have to look at my calendar right now.
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Like it's Thursday.
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Think about Monday.
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I'm like, oh, what do I do on Monday?
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A lot of great stuff, but I'd have to think about it, right?
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If we don't do that, we will never remember.
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So to be able to have a bit of a reset and go, what have I actually done today?
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What have I achieved this week?
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What are the things that I'm proud of?
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Like really allowing yourself to soak in the stuff that you have smashed out is super, super important.
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So that's the first part.
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But then I want you to get really clear on what your top three most important actions are that you want to tackle tomorrow, if you're doing it in the afternoon for the following day.
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Or if we're doing it on Friday, it's the three things that you are gonna tackle next week.
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So it is allowing yourself to actually go, these are the things that I've done, super proud, well done, you're a bloody legend.
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And also these are things that I haven't done yet, but I'm going to.
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As opposed to allowing yourself to spell, oh my God, there's so many things I need to do.
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I didn't get on top of everything.
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Of course, you didn't get on top of everything, you absolute nutcase.
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But you want to get clear on what is the top three things.
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Please note that I did not say write down everything in your head and write a mammoth to-do list.
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I didn't say that.
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I said three things.
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And the reason that I do this, it's getting you really clear on what actually matters.
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Everyone can write a lengthy to-do list.
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You don't get a medal for the longest one that you can write.
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It's not the point.
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But you do get a medal for being the type of person who goes, tomorrow, these are the top three things that I need to tackle.
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Next week, these are the top three things that I need to tackle.
00:14:13.279 --> 00:14:14.399
And I want you to write it down.
00:14:14.559 --> 00:14:20.639
It will take you this whole process, the reflecting and the resetting will take you 15 minutes tops.
00:14:20.720 --> 00:14:22.720
It is such a quick exercise.
00:14:22.879 --> 00:14:26.080
I do it weekly on paper and mentally each day.
00:14:26.240 --> 00:14:29.679
So every Friday I write it down because it helps me with my weekend so much.
00:14:29.759 --> 00:14:31.360
I've been doing this for years.
00:14:31.600 --> 00:14:35.600
But at the end of each day, I used to do it uh on paper as well.
00:14:35.759 --> 00:14:38.000
I had a journal, a diary I used to do it for.
00:14:38.159 --> 00:14:40.799
Now, the last probably 18 months, I do it mentally.
00:14:40.960 --> 00:14:44.320
However, I have clients who do it on paper each day.
00:14:44.399 --> 00:14:47.840
Um, and it's just finding what works best for you, right?
00:14:47.919 --> 00:14:50.879
But if you're finding doing it mentally doesn't work, write it down.
00:14:51.039 --> 00:14:52.480
It will absolutely work.
00:14:52.559 --> 00:14:56.559
And if you've never done this before, you're
not allowed to start with the mentally doing it.
00:14:56.639 --> 00:14:57.840
I'm sorry, it's just not how it works.
00:14:57.919 --> 00:15:03.440
It's like, you know, when you get a pencil and you have to like practice with your pencil before you get your pen license, it's exactly like this.
00:15:03.519 --> 00:15:05.440
You're not allowed to jump straight to the pen license.
00:15:05.600 --> 00:15:07.440
No, you're not, you've got to start with the pencil.
00:15:07.600 --> 00:15:10.559
So what that means is start by writing it out.
00:15:10.799 --> 00:15:13.120
This process is super powerful.
00:15:13.279 --> 00:15:17.279
It closes that mental loop that stops work from following you home.
00:15:17.519 --> 00:15:24.720
Like you walk out of the office or you close your laptop, being really clear on what you have done, which is a massive sense of accomplishment.
00:15:24.879 --> 00:15:34.080
And you also walk away not feeling overwhelmed by all the things you haven't done yet, but being clear on what is most important for you to tackle at your next nine to five.
00:15:34.159 --> 00:15:35.679
It's written down, it's clear.
00:15:35.759 --> 00:15:38.639
So now you can go into your five to nine with a plan.
00:15:38.799 --> 00:15:40.399
There's nothing better than a plan.
00:15:40.480 --> 00:15:41.759
Can I just have a sip of my drink, please?
00:15:41.919 --> 00:15:42.879
Hold on a second.
00:15:44.960 --> 00:15:45.759
Oh, that's better.
00:15:45.840 --> 00:15:46.399
Thank you so much.
00:15:46.960 --> 00:15:57.679
Okay, the second way to actually switch off your nine to five so you can switch on your five to nine is number two, engage in a task where you can't multitask.
00:15:58.320 --> 00:15:59.039
Oh my god.
00:15:59.200 --> 00:16:01.840
Engage in a task where you can't multitask.
00:16:02.000 --> 00:16:11.039
So many people go from work to sitting on the couch with their phone in their hand, watching TV, chatting to the kids, phone or laptop in hand.
00:16:11.200 --> 00:16:13.360
Zero switching off is taking place.
00:16:13.600 --> 00:16:21.759
And the world we live in now, people are making dinner with their iPads, they're folding washing with a podcast on, and all of this is great.
00:16:21.919 --> 00:16:27.440
However, when it comes to really switching off, we need to find a task where you can only do one thing.
00:16:27.679 --> 00:16:28.399
I love this.
00:16:28.559 --> 00:16:29.679
This is so powerful.
00:16:29.840 --> 00:16:34.879
I honestly think, and I was saying this to my friend Mon, I honestly think it's why I love pickleball so much.
00:16:35.039 --> 00:16:38.080
Like when I'm playing pickleball, it's all I'm doing.
00:16:38.320 --> 00:16:43.279
Or even when I'm at CrossFit with a bunch of other people and my husband as well, it's all I'm doing.
00:16:43.440 --> 00:16:47.200
When your body's occupied, your brain has to actually focus.
00:16:47.279 --> 00:16:51.200
Like there's less room left for work thoughts to sneak in.
00:16:51.360 --> 00:17:01.120
So I want you to actually play this game where you're making it harder for yourself to reach for the phone or the laptop and find a task for you where you can't do multiple things at once.
00:17:01.200 --> 00:17:02.559
You know, maybe it's swimming.
00:17:02.720 --> 00:17:08.319
Even when I go dancing, like you're not doing anything except standing up there and trying to figure out the moves.
00:17:08.480 --> 00:17:09.519
Like one thing, dance.
00:17:09.599 --> 00:17:13.920
Even if you go for a bike ride, like no one's scrolling social media when they're bike riding.
00:17:14.079 --> 00:17:18.160
But find something for you, engage in a task where you can't multitask.
00:17:18.240 --> 00:17:23.759
And I honestly think, like back to pickleball, I truly think that it's one of the reasons why it's become so popular lately.
00:17:23.839 --> 00:17:27.519
Like I know that you could pick any sport and it would be the same thing.
00:17:27.759 --> 00:17:30.799
But it truly is something that people have a lot of fun with.
00:17:30.960 --> 00:17:32.400
You can belt the crap out of it.
00:17:32.480 --> 00:17:34.079
It's such a fun ball to belt.
00:17:34.240 --> 00:17:35.680
I think that's what I enjoy about it.
00:17:35.839 --> 00:17:38.960
I am not good at pickleball and I am I thoroughly enjoy it.
00:17:39.119 --> 00:17:45.920
Like if anyone wants to, instead of having a coffee with me, say, let's go pick like get pickleball, I will find a space in my calendar.
00:17:46.079 --> 00:17:49.119
Like I am that, I'm that into it.
00:17:49.279 --> 00:17:50.720
It is so much fun.
00:17:50.880 --> 00:17:55.519
Um, but it is all about the fact that you just can't multitask when you're doing it.
00:17:55.680 --> 00:18:03.359
So if you are really wanting to switch off, it is up to you to think of something where what is a task that I can do where you can't do anything else?
00:18:03.519 --> 00:18:05.119
You can only do that.
00:18:05.200 --> 00:18:10.880
And you will find that once you've done that, the the feeling that you get, that real, oh my God, I enjoyed it.
00:18:11.039 --> 00:18:13.599
That was such a good time, it's because you switched off.
00:18:13.759 --> 00:18:15.599
That is the feeling that we are going for.
00:18:15.759 --> 00:18:17.519
I want you to be switched on when you're at work.
00:18:17.680 --> 00:18:20.400
I want you to be doing phenomenal things when you are at work.
00:18:20.559 --> 00:18:22.400
I am a huge advocate for that.
00:18:22.480 --> 00:18:25.359
I work my booty off in work hours and I love it.
00:18:25.519 --> 00:18:27.039
I give it everything that I've got.
00:18:27.279 --> 00:18:37.440
However, when I start to feel that feeling of it like it's seeping in onto my Saturday, onto my Sunday, which it so very often can do, it's hang on a minute, change the station.
00:18:37.680 --> 00:18:41.119
I need to do something where I am focused on that purely.
00:18:41.200 --> 00:18:43.279
And it often is having a
lot of fun.
00:18:43.440 --> 00:18:50.880
Speaking of fun, the third way to actually switch off your nine to five so that you can switch on your five to nine is have fun.
00:18:51.279 --> 00:18:55.359
And I spoke about this in the intro, but I can't stress this enough.
00:18:55.519 --> 00:18:58.319
You have to work out what fun means for you.
00:18:58.559 --> 00:19:04.799
Because what you used to do or what you used to find fun a few years ago, you might not find fun anymore.
00:19:04.960 --> 00:19:06.960
Like we change, like you've changed.
00:19:07.039 --> 00:19:09.279
So what does fun look like for you now?
00:19:09.440 --> 00:19:11.119
Like, is it baking muffins?
00:19:11.279 --> 00:19:12.240
Is it gardening?
00:19:12.480 --> 00:19:14.079
God, this is a new hobby for me, guys.
00:19:14.160 --> 00:19:20.400
Like it actually, for those of you who have been around a while, you might know that before I turn 40, I wrote a list.
00:19:20.480 --> 00:19:23.519
It's also in my book called The Shake Up available on Amazon and Audible.
00:19:23.680 --> 00:19:26.640
But I wrote a list of 40 things I don't want to do before I'm 40.
00:19:26.799 --> 00:19:27.759
I talk about in the book.
00:19:27.920 --> 00:19:31.759
I've there's probably an episode on it somewhere on the podcast where I have talked about this as well.
00:19:31.920 --> 00:19:33.359
It was such a fun exercise.
00:19:33.440 --> 00:19:42.079
But I literally wrote down all the things that I would typically go, hell no, I don't want to do that and screw up my face and you know make a big joke about how boring, right?
00:19:42.240 --> 00:19:47.519
Like uh golf was on there, keyno was like playing keynote with my brother was on there.
00:19:47.599 --> 00:19:49.359
Um, still probably the most boring.
00:19:49.440 --> 00:19:52.160
Like, even though I did it, it was fun because I did it with my brother and I got to tick it off.
00:19:52.240 --> 00:19:53.359
But like, I I don't get it.
00:19:53.440 --> 00:19:55.279
I'm not really into gambling and all that sort of stuff.
00:19:55.359 --> 00:19:57.920
I'd rather spend my money on other things, you know what I mean?
00:19:58.160 --> 00:19:59.440
Uh, what else was on it?
00:19:59.599 --> 00:20:03.839
Uh cook a meal, like a three-course meal for my mum and dad.
00:20:04.000 --> 00:20:05.839
Things that I would just be like, no, thank you.
00:20:06.000 --> 00:20:09.599
Anyway, long story short, everything on that bloody list I really enjoyed.
00:20:09.839 --> 00:20:18.400
I didn't tick everything off though, because I don't know if this will shock you, but it's kind of boring to do things you don't want to do, even though you have fun doing it.
00:20:18.559 --> 00:20:20.960
It's like the lead up is just not fun, you know?
00:20:21.039 --> 00:20:21.839
So there were a few things.
00:20:21.920 --> 00:20:22.799
I'm still working through it.
00:20:22.880 --> 00:20:24.799
I still have the list, still working through it.
00:20:24.960 --> 00:20:27.519
One of the
things that I didn't do was gardening.
00:20:27.920 --> 00:20:29.839
Oh God, now I love it.
00:20:30.079 --> 00:20:30.880
I love it.
00:20:31.039 --> 00:20:33.519
And I never thought this would come out of my mouth.
00:20:33.680 --> 00:20:38.079
And then I feel old because I love it, but I also don't care because it is one of those things.
00:20:38.160 --> 00:20:42.160
If we refer to point number two, engage in a task where you can't multitask.
00:20:42.319 --> 00:20:50.640
I feel like when I'm out there and I'm pulling out the dead stuff and I'm cutting back the things that shouldn't be there and I'm planting new things and I'm watering things so they don't die.
00:20:50.799 --> 00:20:52.720
By the way, watering is hectic.
00:20:52.880 --> 00:20:55.279
Like I literally have to water every single day.
00:20:55.440 --> 00:20:58.880
And I watered yesterday and I went out today and I feel like they're dying.
00:20:58.960 --> 00:21:00.880
I'm like, I watered you yesterday.
00:21:01.039 --> 00:21:04.319
It is a relentless hobby, I tell ya.
00:21:04.559 --> 00:21:11.359
Anyway, gardening is something that maybe you don't want to do, but maybe if you did it, you would find that it would go on your fun list.
00:21:11.440 --> 00:21:12.240
So give it a crack.
00:21:12.319 --> 00:21:14.079
Don't knock it until you try it, says me.
00:21:14.160 --> 00:21:16.480
And if you told me this a few years ago, I'd tell you to jump.
00:21:16.640 --> 00:21:18.880
Anyway, um, what else could it be?
00:21:18.960 --> 00:21:21.599
It could be hiking, it could be just going to the beach.
00:21:21.759 --> 00:21:24.480
It might be fun for you, is going to lunch with a friend.
00:21:24.640 --> 00:21:27.279
It could be reading, uh, it could be handstands.
00:21:27.359 --> 00:21:27.920
That's one of mine.
00:21:28.079 --> 00:21:29.279
Bloody love doing handstands.
00:21:29.359 --> 00:21:30.240
Any opportunity I can.
00:21:30.319 --> 00:21:34.000
If I've got pants on, I am doing a handstand.
00:21:34.079 --> 00:21:38.000
Like all it requires is an even surface and pants.
00:21:38.240 --> 00:21:42.640
If I can tick those two things off, I don't care where I am, handstand is coming your way.
00:21:42.799 --> 00:21:43.200
The best.
00:21:43.279 --> 00:21:45.359
Actually, now I think about I have pants on today.
00:21:45.599 --> 00:21:50.160
I could absolutely go into the garden beside my plants and do a handstand.
00:21:50.240 --> 00:21:52.480
Oh, is there anything more fun?
00:21:52.799 --> 00:21:53.599
Stop it.
00:21:53.759 --> 00:21:55.920
Uh, it could even be doing puzzles, right?
00:21:56.000 --> 00:21:57.920
That I I actually hate doing puzzles.
00:21:58.000 --> 00:21:59.119
That's not my thing at all.
00:21:59.279 --> 00:21:59.759
I don't know.
00:22:00.160 --> 00:22:04.240
The attention span, especially if it's a puzzle that's got like a gabillion blue pieces, for example.
00:22:04.400 --> 00:22:05.440
Like, shut up.
00:22:05.599 --> 00:22:07.200
That's not fun, you know?
00:22:07.279 --> 00:22:11.279
Uh, but you have to decide what fun is for you first and foremost.
00:22:11.440 --> 00:22:18.240
Because if you don't have something fun lined up, your default goes straight back to work because it's just an easy option.
00:22:18.400 --> 00:22:19.440
It's a familiar option.
00:22:19.680 --> 00:22:21.440
Work is the easy default.
00:22:21.599 --> 00:22:23.599
I've caught myself doing that in the past.
00:22:23.839 --> 00:22:26.559
Like all of a sudden I didn't have anything to do on a Saturday afternoon.
00:22:26.640 --> 00:22:30.559
So I was like, oh, I might as well just go into the office and catch up on some emails.
00:22:30.720 --> 00:22:37.599
You know, next minute I've been there for five hours and then Sunday comes around and I can't stop thinking about the work that I accidentally did on Saturday.
00:22:37.759 --> 00:22:38.720
No shit.
00:22:39.039 --> 00:22:41.200
Work cannot be your default.
00:22:41.440 --> 00:22:43.200
And I don't care.
00:22:43.359 --> 00:22:44.799
I actually don't like saying I don't care.
00:22:45.039 --> 00:22:45.759
Sounds really terrible.
00:22:45.839 --> 00:22:51.680
I was talking to one of my friends about it this week where she sent me her keynote intro and part of it was like, I don't care.
00:22:51.759 --> 00:22:52.720
And I was like, you do care.
00:22:52.880 --> 00:22:53.759
Don't say you don't care.
00:22:53.920 --> 00:22:54.960
I actually do care.
00:22:55.200 --> 00:23:01.759
But I I really do not believe that even if, God, that was really hard to reword it.
00:23:01.920 --> 00:23:06.400
Even if you say that you love your job so much, which I get, I love my job too.
00:23:06.559 --> 00:23:07.200
I love it.
00:23:07.440 --> 00:23:10.960
It's still not allowed to be the default just because you've got nothing to do.
00:23:11.200 --> 00:23:12.640
Like get creative.
00:23:12.960 --> 00:23:19.599
You know, spend time thinking about what you would love to do in your five to nine and on weekends when you're not working.
00:23:19.839 --> 00:23:22.799
Allow yourself, like get out a blank piece of paper if that floats your boat.
00:23:22.880 --> 00:23:29.119
Like get out your a blank um notes thing on your phone, whatever it is, and just allow yourself to write.
00:23:29.200 --> 00:23:34.480
Like if I wasn't doing work, if I wasn't allowed to work, what is fun for me?
00:23:34.640 --> 00:23:35.920
And you might be really surprised.
00:23:36.000 --> 00:23:40.160
You know, you might sort of start saying, especially now that we're going into summer in Australia, thank God.
00:23:40.319 --> 00:23:46.240
It might be things like paddleboarding, it might be things like camping, it might be things like um doing pottery.
00:23:46.480 --> 00:23:52.319
Um I only said pottery because I was reminiscing on all the things that I've done in the past.
00:23:52.400 --> 00:23:56.960
And I went and did pottery a couple of years ago with uh acrylic nails on.
00:23:57.200 --> 00:23:58.880
You idiot,
Candace Harvey.
00:23:58.960 --> 00:24:00.400
The lady looked at me like I had two heads.
00:24:00.480 --> 00:24:01.519
I didn't even think it through.
00:24:01.680 --> 00:24:03.119
Like it was pottery on a wheel.
00:24:03.279 --> 00:24:03.920
I went on my own.
00:24:04.000 --> 00:24:06.480
There was a few other people, but I actually went on my own.
00:24:06.640 --> 00:24:10.640
And she looked at me like, I don't know if you can do that with nails.
00:24:10.799 --> 00:24:11.359
I couldn't.
00:24:11.440 --> 00:24:12.160
It was stupid.
00:24:12.319 --> 00:24:17.440
Anyway, but I want you to get really clear on what is fun to you and start writing it out.
00:24:17.599 --> 00:24:19.839
Get yourself a new book, start writing out a list.
00:24:19.920 --> 00:24:27.200
Because, like I said, if you don't know what you're gonna be doing for fun, your default is to work, which means that you ain't ever switching off, my friend.
00:24:27.359 --> 00:24:28.880
And I want you to because why?
00:24:29.039 --> 00:24:30.640
Work is only one part of your life.
00:24:30.799 --> 00:24:39.039
The fourth way to actually switch off your nine to five so that you can switch on your five to nine is to show up for your five to nine.
00:24:39.200 --> 00:24:43.359
What I mean by that, make an effort with your five to nine.
00:24:43.519 --> 00:24:46.000
Don't let it be a sloth session.
00:24:46.160 --> 00:24:48.480
Don't let it be I've had a big day at work.
00:24:48.720 --> 00:24:49.279
I get it.
00:24:49.440 --> 00:24:50.240
Like you might have.
00:24:50.400 --> 00:24:59.359
Last night I was uh doing a closing keynote conference in Brisbane, and the build-up to any session I do is always like it's big, right?
00:24:59.440 --> 00:25:00.400
It's a lot of nerves.
00:25:00.480 --> 00:25:02.400
There's excitement, there's the come down.
00:25:02.720 --> 00:25:12.640
And after the gig, I decided just swing by IKEA before it closed and probably got the, I don't know, the heaviest thing that you could possibly get in like the warehouse section.
00:25:12.799 --> 00:25:15.680
I said to my husband, I was like, I'll get it on the way home, no worries.
00:25:15.839 --> 00:25:17.039
Like it was something that I wanted.
00:25:17.119 --> 00:25:21.039
I picked it up, and it was for this part in our house that is so dumb.
00:25:21.200 --> 00:25:25.759
Like, I don't know if anyone has areas in their house where they're like, who built this?
00:25:25.920 --> 00:25:28.319
They called it on the plan the study nook.
00:25:28.400 --> 00:25:28.960
It's stupid.
00:25:29.039 --> 00:25:33.440
It's absolutely stupid, but you need to have a piece of furniture in there, otherwise it just looks like a hole in the wall.
00:25:33.519 --> 00:25:34.000
It's dumb.
00:25:34.160 --> 00:25:36.640
Anyway, I found something perfect, went to IKEA.
00:25:36.799 --> 00:25:38.319
God, Jody, I hope you're enjoying this.
00:25:38.400 --> 00:25:40.160
I am digressing a lot.
00:25:40.240 --> 00:25:42.079
Um, but I quick, I
was pooped, right?
00:25:42.240 --> 00:25:47.359
Keynote, IKEA, driving home, peak hour traffic, absolutely exhausted.
00:25:47.440 --> 00:25:57.119
So I called my husband, and because I want to show up for my five to nine, regardless of what's gone on in my nine to five, I said to him, Hey, let's meet at our local tie in 10 minutes.
00:25:57.200 --> 00:25:59.039
Let's not cook, let's have a date night.
00:25:59.200 --> 00:26:01.119
And he was like, absolutely see you there.
00:26:01.200 --> 00:26:02.079
And it was the best.
00:26:02.240 --> 00:26:04.720
We were both pooped, because that can happen with both of us.
00:26:04.799 --> 00:26:12.559
We both have very big, big jobs, but we got to have dinner together across from each other, sharing our day in between yawns was totally fine.
00:26:12.720 --> 00:26:15.839
But it was way better than being at home just on the couch.
00:26:16.000 --> 00:26:26.240
You know, switching off from your nine to five is about actively engaging with the people that you're with, like not just occupy the same space as them, but really make an effort.
00:26:26.319 --> 00:26:30.640
You know, put the phone away, ask real questions, be present when they're talking to you.
00:26:30.799 --> 00:26:39.279
Switching off from work is only half the job, but switching on for your people is the other half, and probably the most important part.
00:26:39.440 --> 00:26:41.200
And it does take a lot of effort.
00:26:41.359 --> 00:26:45.839
It is why, honestly, a lot of people just get out their phones and doom scroll.
00:26:46.000 --> 00:26:50.079
You know, like you see memes about this, and oh my god, my husband and I have done this before as well.
00:26:50.160 --> 00:26:53.839
Like you're both on the couch and you're both scrolling, you're both in bed and you're both scrolling.
00:26:54.000 --> 00:26:58.160
And the moment I realize, because sometimes you don't realize it, and I get a bit like, oh God, what are we doing?
00:26:58.319 --> 00:26:58.720
Stop.
00:26:58.880 --> 00:26:59.599
Like, stop.
00:26:59.920 --> 00:27:08.000
And we have to like put our phones down, look at each other's cute faces and connect or have a conversation because we just don't want to get into that habit.
00:27:08.160 --> 00:27:13.839
But it is about being really present, switching off from work is only half of it.
00:27:14.000 --> 00:27:16.960
Switching on for the other people is the most important.
00:27:17.119 --> 00:27:30.240
So, like, even if you've spent any time with me or oh wait, she's about to say it, read her book or listened to the podcast previously, you will know though, that my least favorite word on the absolute planet is busy.
00:27:30.400 --> 00:27:31.759
Ugh, it's the worst word.
00:27:31.920 --> 00:27:32.640
It means nothing.
00:27:32.720 --> 00:27:34.079
It's a conversation stopper.
00:27:34.160 --> 00:27:36.240
It's just so bloody boring, the word busy.
00:27:36.319 --> 00:27:41.519
So of course, I've given everyone around me a complex on the word, which I absolutely love.
00:27:41.920 --> 00:27:46.880
But when you are wanting to switch off from work, don't speak about it as busy, please.
00:27:47.039 --> 00:27:47.359
Right?
00:27:47.440 --> 00:27:50.960
When people say how was your day, do not say busy.
00:27:51.119 --> 00:27:56.480
Like jump back to number one and allow yourself, which was all about reflecting and resetting, right?
00:27:56.559 --> 00:27:57.279
Which was number one.
00:27:57.440 --> 00:28:01.519
But I want you to jump back to that and allow yourself to answer with some purpose in it.
00:28:01.759 --> 00:28:04.000
Reflect and reset.
00:28:04.079 --> 00:28:05.519
Like, what have you done that day?
00:28:05.680 --> 00:28:07.200
Like what's been going on this week?
00:28:07.359 --> 00:28:08.480
What's coming up for you?
00:28:08.640 --> 00:28:12.160
Yes, it is easier and lazier to just answer with busy.
00:28:12.319 --> 00:28:14.079
Yep, it absolutely is.
00:28:14.480 --> 00:28:17.359
But the person you're speaking to deserves better.
00:28:17.599 --> 00:28:19.279
And so does your nine to five.
00:28:19.359 --> 00:28:22.640
So make the effort and really show up for your five to nine.
00:28:23.119 --> 00:28:24.400
I actually really enjoyed that.
00:28:24.559 --> 00:28:32.799
I hope that really landed for uh who whoever is listening, whoever is my mum, mum listening, I hope that really landed where it's about making an effort.
00:28:32.960 --> 00:28:35.839
Your default is easy, but make an effort.
00:28:36.000 --> 00:28:44.160
Now, the fifth and final way to actually switch off your nine to five so that you can switch on your five to nine is to hold the boundary.
00:28:44.400 --> 00:28:51.039
If you are really serious about being someone who switches off after work, be the type of person who switches off.
00:28:51.279 --> 00:28:55.359
Yes, some of your habits will need changing, of course they will, but change them.
00:28:55.519 --> 00:28:57.359
Change the channel, as I like to say.
00:28:57.519 --> 00:29:00.000
We get to change the channel, it's all a choice.
00:29:00.160 --> 00:29:06.400
So with holding the boundary, it is about intentionally turning off your notifications if that is what just kills you.
00:29:06.640 --> 00:29:07.759
Hide your laptop.
00:29:07.839 --> 00:29:11.920
And I guarantee that you will experience quite a bit of friction.
00:29:12.079 --> 00:29:13.200
Like just know that.
00:29:13.359 --> 00:29:16.000
When you are holding a boundary, you will experience friction.
00:29:16.079 --> 00:29:18.559
I don't know if you need to write that down, but write that down.
00:29:18.720 --> 00:29:21.119
Holding a boundary does not just mean it's easy.
00:29:21.200 --> 00:29:24.160
You're turning off notifications or like I said, closing down your laptop.
00:29:24.319 --> 00:29:29.440
I actually said hiding your laptop, which I thought was really funny, and then I just didn't make note of it, but I've talked about it now.
00:29:29.519 -->
00:29:33.359
Uh, like I just picture someone hiding, like we're fully grown adults, right?
00:29:33.440 --> 00:29:34.960
Like, I'm gonna put it in the cupboard.
00:29:35.119 --> 00:29:37.920
I'm gonna put it under my pillow, whatever it is.
00:29:38.079 --> 00:29:44.480
But I want you to know that you will feel friction, meaning you will feel discomfort because you don't want to do that.
00:29:44.640 --> 00:29:48.319
It is much easier to keep working, it is much easier to scroll on your phone.
00:29:48.559 --> 00:29:50.640
You will experience discomfort.
00:29:50.720 --> 00:29:54.720
You might even feel a bit of guilt and shame and anxiety.
00:29:54.960 --> 00:29:57.359
I've actually spoken to a lot of clients about this as well.
00:29:57.440 --> 00:29:59.440
Like they feel like I should be doing this.
00:29:59.599 --> 00:30:00.960
I didn't get enough done that day.
00:30:01.119 --> 00:30:02.559
I didn't do enough last week.
00:30:02.720 --> 00:30:03.920
I need to catch up.
00:30:04.079 --> 00:30:06.880
Like you'll start to tell yourself all of these things.
00:30:07.119 --> 00:30:12.160
Also, your nine to five will be there tomorrow or the following week.
00:30:12.319 --> 00:30:15.359
But this is not about your nine to five, it's about your five to nine.
00:30:15.599 --> 00:30:23.599
And it really is about realizing that if you do feel guilt, shame, anxiety, you won't die.
00:30:23.920 --> 00:30:27.519
But for a really long time, what's happened is you haven't been switching off.
00:30:27.680 --> 00:30:30.400
You've been allowing yourself to stay switched on.
00:30:30.559 --> 00:30:32.240
And habits are really tricky to change.
00:30:32.400 --> 00:30:41.519
But once you realize how much better life is when you're exceptional in your nine to five and you're loving your five to nine more than ever before, it'll be worth it.
00:30:41.680 --> 00:30:53.039
So holding the boundary is all about knowing that there's going to be discomfort there of doing this because, like I said, it's easier to default to work, but knowing that you want to be the type of person who switches off.
00:30:53.279 --> 00:30:55.359
Switch on when you've got to and switch off.
00:30:55.519 --> 00:31:00.640
I was even talking to a phenomenal bloody human today, this morning.
00:31:00.799 --> 00:31:03.839
Uh, I was like, what has gone on today?
00:31:04.000 --> 00:31:12.400
Um, incredible bloody human, absolutely loved her, and she has a massive team, she's got an incredible organization, like a huge business.
00:31:12.640 --> 00:31:20.079
And when she was talking about the way that she sets things up, because she said that she's on social media quite a lot, and people actually say to her, God, you're busy, you do so much.
00:31:20.160 --> 00:31:24.720
And she's like, Yeah, in in the hours that I want to, and then when I'm home, it's family first.
00:31:25.119 --> 00:31:28.240
And she has this real routine, it was a beautiful routine, actually.
00:31:28.400 --> 00:31:30.880
Every
single morning, she said it's her non-negotiable.
00:31:31.039 --> 00:31:36.559
She goes for a coffee with herself and she reads a few pages of the Bible and she goes through what she's got to do for the day.
00:31:36.799 --> 00:31:38.160
She's like, That's my non-negotiable.
00:31:38.319 --> 00:31:41.920
And I was like, I love that that is your non-negotiable.
00:31:42.079 --> 00:31:43.839
Like, I just thought that was so great.
00:31:43.920 --> 00:31:52.319
And then she said it in the evenings, it's all about my family, and holidays are really important, and and weekends away, and time with her mum and her dad, and she's got two kids, a husband.
00:31:52.400 --> 00:31:54.079
I was like, oh, it's great.
00:31:54.240 --> 00:31:56.640
But it's actually not easy in the beginning, is my point.
00:31:56.880 --> 00:32:02.400
She said there was a time where she was just this complete people pleaser, and she ended up going and doing a lot of therapy about it.
00:32:02.480 --> 00:32:10.160
It's like, you keep living this life where you are saying yes to everyone, doing all the things, leaving yourself to last, you will burn out and you will be useless.
00:32:10.319 --> 00:32:13.359
And she was apparently at a stage where it was like, I am at that point.
00:32:13.440 --> 00:32:15.599
Like I'm I'm exhausted saying yes to everything.
00:32:15.680 --> 00:32:16.319
And now she doesn't.
00:32:16.400 --> 00:32:17.359
And she said it's hard.
00:32:17.440 --> 00:32:18.160
It's really hard.
00:32:18.319 --> 00:32:22.240
Holding the boundary, which is number five, is really, really challenging.
00:32:22.400 --> 00:32:23.440
It feels uncomfortable.
00:32:23.599 --> 00:32:25.599
It feels like you're, you know, doing the wrong thing.
00:32:25.759 --> 00:32:36.960
It feels like you're pushing back on people, but actually you're holding yourself to a higher regard and you're allowing yourself to be the type of person who can switch off from nine to five, which, like I said at the beginning, is an absolute flex.
00:32:37.359 --> 00:32:38.960
It is an absolute flex.
00:32:39.200 --> 00:32:41.519
Anybody can work long hours.
00:32:41.759 --> 00:32:43.279
Anyone can default to work.
00:32:43.440 --> 00:32:45.599
Anyone can say that they just work 24-7.
00:32:45.839 --> 00:32:50.319
Whenever I hear people say that, I immediately I'm like, that's not cool.
00:32:50.480 --> 00:32:51.359
Like it's just not.
00:32:51.519 --> 00:33:01.200
But when I hear people saying my laptop's down at five, I want to, I focus, I play, I do this, I'm going out to pickleball or I can't have this meeting now because I'm going swimming or whatever, I'm like, I love that.
00:33:01.279 --> 00:33:03.200
Go do things where you can't multitask.
00:33:03.359 --> 00:33:04.400
Go switch off.
00:33:04.559 --> 00:33:05.920
So that is it.
00:33:06.240 --> 00:33:07.920
Reflect and reset number one.
00:33:08.000 --> 00:33:10.079
Number two, do something you can't multitask through.
00:33:10.240 --> 00:33:13.759
Number three, work out what fun actually means for you, please.
00:33:13.920 --> 00:33:16.960
Number four, show up properly for your five to nine.
00:33:17.039 --> 00:33:21.200
And number five, hold the boundary even when it's absolutely uncomfortable.
00:33:21.359 --> 00:33:23.200
None of these are actually complicated.
00:33:23.279 --> 00:33:28.400
Like you don't need an app, a retreat, or a Sunday night ritual with candles.
00:33:28.640 --> 00:33:30.960
You just need to close the loop at work.
00:33:31.119 --> 00:33:33.599
Pick one thing that you can't half do.
00:33:33.680 --> 00:33:36.720
And then actually be where your feet are once you're home.
00:33:36.960 --> 00:33:37.519
Be present.
00:33:37.599 --> 00:33:38.160
That's it.
00:33:38.319 --> 00:33:39.839
That's the whole system.
00:33:39.920 --> 00:33:42.799
And look, you are not gonna nail all five this week.
00:33:42.960 --> 00:33:43.839
Start with one.
00:33:44.000 --> 00:33:46.640
Maybe it's just answering what did you actually do today?
00:33:46.720 --> 00:33:52.400
And instead of saying busy, really allow yourself to tell them what you did.
00:33:52.559 --> 00:33:58.960
You know, even if you did have a day where you were back to Mac meetings, you're allowed to say, I had a day today where I was in back to back meetings.
00:33:59.119 --> 00:34:01.119
I had a meeting with one guy, I had the entire team.
00:34:01.200 --> 00:34:02.960
I had that like answer the question.
00:34:03.200 --> 00:34:05.839
Saying busy is awful.
00:34:06.079 --> 00:34:09.039
Like I said, the person who's asking the question deserves better.
00:34:09.119 --> 00:34:10.880
And also, so does your nine to five.
00:34:11.039 --> 00:34:14.960
To have an entire day dedicated to something and all you spit out is busy.
00:34:15.280 --> 00:34:16.079
Come on.
00:34:16.320 --> 00:34:21.840
There were people that you met, there were things that you did, there were emails that you pushed out, there were like share it, right?
00:34:22.000 --> 00:34:24.719
So maybe that is all you decide to do this week.
00:34:25.039 --> 00:34:25.840
Ban busy.
00:34:26.000 --> 00:34:28.159
If I've given you a complex, you're welcome.
00:34:28.400 --> 00:34:34.159
But even if your one thing that you want to do this week, maybe it's leaving the phone in another room at dinner, right?
00:34:34.320 --> 00:34:36.239
Like really not allowing it to be anywhere.
00:34:36.320 --> 00:34:39.199
And that could be something where you're listening to and go, I already do that, Candace.
00:34:39.360 --> 00:34:40.000
Well done, you.
00:34:40.159 --> 00:34:40.960
So proud of you.
00:34:41.119 --> 00:34:44.079
For other people, though, go put it in another room.
00:34:44.320 --> 00:34:44.559
Right?
00:34:44.719 --> 00:34:45.599
And it might feel weird.
00:34:45.679 --> 00:34:47.679
You might be like, I always have my phone beside me.
00:34:47.840 --> 00:34:48.239
Cool.
00:34:48.400 --> 00:34:49.519
Hold the friction.
00:34:49.679 --> 00:34:50.480
It's okay.
00:34:50.639 --> 00:34:57.360
But pick the one that almost annoyed you the most while you were listening to me today, the thing that I said that made you want to argue it with me.
00:34:57.599 --> 00:34:59.679
That's usually the one that you need.
00:34:59.840 --> 00:35:02.000
Because here's what I actually want for you.
00:35:02.239 --> 00:35:06.159
I don't want you to be impressive at work and pooped everywhere else.
00:35:06.400 --> 00:35:12.480
I want you to be exceptional in your nine to five and genuinely properly switched on for your five to nine.
00:35:12.639 --> 00:35:13.440
That's the flex.
00:35:13.760 --> 00:35:16.079
That's the whole freaking point.
00:35:16.320 --> 00:35:19.840
So go switch off, have fun in your five to nine.
00:35:19.920 --> 00:35:22.880
And if oh I just pressed the wrong button.
00:35:23.679 --> 00:35:24.960
Wrong button again.
00:35:25.599 --> 00:35:26.239
There it is.
00:35:26.400 --> 00:35:27.119
Go switch off.
00:35:27.199 --> 00:35:28.639
Go have fun in your five to nine.
00:35:28.719 --> 00:35:32.880
And if you think this episode was worth it, maybe your friends need a listen as well.
00:35:33.039 --> 00:35:34.000
Please send it to them.
00:35:34.079 --> 00:35:36.159
And if you share it on socials, tag me in.
00:35:36.320 --> 00:35:37.199
I would love that.
00:35:37.440 --> 00:35:38.559
Thank you so much.
00:35:38.719 --> 00:35:41.519
Until next time, go have fun and shake things up.