Fuld transskription af Rewriting the Playbook: How to Build a Purpose-Driven Life: With Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren

you are today, it's important for us to start right at the beginning. You were diagnosed with type 1 diabetes at a young age. Can you take us back to that time and despite that diagnosis, how did you make sure it never stood in the way of your dreams? Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: So when I was four old, I was living in Busha, Saskatchewan, and was fortunate enough to be quite a l young little hockey player, loved hockey, it lived, eat, slept, breathed hockey. And I was actually my babysitters that day and I was extremely thirsty. And so I kept asking for more fluids and more fluids. going to the bathroom, more fluids again, more fluids. And I just got over like a flu virus or a cold and I was like, this is weird. So I my parents were both nurses and they're like, Sun's up. but Whatever, he's all good for now. And then by lunch, by the time lunch rolled around, I had probably four liters of the milk. in like in SAS, that's a lot. And for a four Dennis Kubat: Yeah. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: year old, that's a lot. And so I like was back and forth to the bathroom. I was really thirsty. And so my babysitter called my dad, I was like, Hey, I think you need to take you up somewhere 'cause he's not being himself right now. He's super thirsty. So my dad came, picked me up, took me home, and he was changing from work and then he said, Go to the bathroom, like sit on toilet. I think you might be constipated. So sat on toilet. couple minutes later, heard the sink of water running and was like, Okay, I guess he's done. A couple minutes later, still heard the sink water running. And so he was like, Well that's kinda weird. They opened up the door and he saw me standing there, lapping water my mouth with my toothbrush. And he was like, that's so odd. And after that He took me to the hospital, went in, got poked, prodded, rushed through merge, and doctors invited my dad into the room and said, Caleb is a type one diabetic and will be as independent for the rest of his life. And that was like the first big crossroads as per se, being a four year old and I didn't like it in the hospital at all. I despised it and was fortunate enough to kinda get out pretty fast because both my parents were nurses and understood how to give injections, how to test glucose, how to even like treat people with diabetes and so it was pretty easy for them to catch on but it was just such culture shock. So when I left the hospital I thought I was home free and I wasn't because I get needles that night, middle of the night, next morning, that became my life. So I kinda hit a downward s downward spiral a bit. I started to not like needle time. Every time I had to eat I knew it was associated with a needle. And so I'd question my parents, do you love me? Why are you hurting me? And Dennis Kubat: Mm-hmm. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: And I tried to hide from them. And that was kind of my first really challenge that I noticed in life was like being at that age of four. Trying to comprehend that I needed insulin to survive and do the things I love to do. So it took me about a month or two, probably two months, to finally kinda grasp it, okay. This is what my reality is, let's make the most of it. I had a great score of parents who helped me with that mindset. And then I started playing hockey again, started to continue on. And I think that was also a challenge of just education. Educating coaches, educating teachers, even classmates, friends, Dennis Kubat: Yeah. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: like what exactly is going on? Why do you have to sit out? Why are you having a snack when you're not supposed to? Why do you have a cell phone in kindergarten? Like you're the only one with a cell phone. So, like, all those conversations were great for like advocacy, education, awareness, but also was like framing me and molding me into being somebody who was either shy and try hide it. And I did for a long time, I really tried to be shy and hide it because I didn't people to me. me differently. And that was kind of when I was about sixteen, even like thirteen to sixty, I started to be more expressive about it. And then 18 I became a provincial ambassador for the Saskatchewan and that Dennis Kubat: Yeah. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: kind thing. But yeah, I'd say that time point was challenging for sure. Just grasping it, understanding it, working through it and then finding like the light the end of the tunnel. Dennis Kubat: a sailing, I truly believe and try to model as a parent is more is caught than taught. So when you look back at how your parents handled that situation, what was there one specific mindset habit you caught from them that showed up when you needed it the most? Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: Yeah, for sure. There's a couple of things that caught my mind when I needed it the most. One of the big ones was I manage my diabetes, I don't let it manage me. And that can be applied to anything. It doesn't have to Dennis Kubat: Yes. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: be just diabetes. Like it could be applied to work, could be applied to academics, like anything and everything. Because if you let it succumb to you and that's all that you are, then you aren't able to pursue your dreams and passions the biggest. And so that was the other is like diabetes doesn't have to hold you back. Unfortunately I'm still able live a life of amazing things and still do everything I want to do. I just have to manage it and not let it manage me. And so I think that's a big piece of the puzzle. The other thing was just like focus on the things that you can control. Even at that young age, it was like, all right, you have this, now you gotta focus on what you can do with it. It's like this happened to you, yes, but are you gonna be a victim or are you gonna be a victor? So are you gonna sit there and whine and weep and welp and be quiet and cry about this? Or you're gonna be all this is. I got let's just make the most of the situation and have a great time with it. And so that was the other thing. And also they spun it

from the negative to something positive. Like I was body aware, so I had to be aware of what I put in my body, even how I was feeling. I also had to add and subtract and divide and multiply for carbs and counting and for insulin. I also had to become more responsible, more accountable. So if I was going low, I had to be like, all right, I'm going low, I have to eat something. and then also it was big for like communication. education there was a lot of big things that diabees actually did and it helped me tremendously and framing that negative into something positive was really helpful for me too Dennis Kubat: I know you're all about perspective and how you see the situation, and that I love that answer. Just changing that negative into a positive. What a great way to live your life. A way I try to role model even as a gym teacher and as a mindset coach. But in 2017, you launched Dalgren's Diabetes. What was that spark or that moment you realized I need to? build something bigger than even just managing my diagnosis. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: Yeah, it started back when I was sixteen. So when I moved to North Alford to play Triple A hockey, I was obviously the new kid on the block and there was actually a classmate of mine who had type one diabetes as well, just recently diagnosed. And so he knew that was a diabetic and he came up to me and was like, Hey, I heard through the grapevine that you're a type one diabetic. I got I just got diagnosed. Like, do you have any tips or tricks? And I was like, wow, okay, sweet, yeah, I do. So I Dennis Kubat: Yeah. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: gave him some tips or tricks. I always carry a snack running at all times. I have welches on me at that time, so I pulled it Dennis Kubat: Yeah. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: out. They always carry a snack at all times and I said like even like depending on what you're doing for physical activity you should maybe have some carbers before if you're gonna do longevity like cross country running, but if you're actually like doing a really competitive sport, then I'd actually kind of be a little wary of having carbs before because you're probably gonna get adrenaline spike. And I kinda like went through all these tips and tricks with him and he sat back, he's like, Wow, you know a lot. I was like, Well thanks. I've dealt with it for like quite a while now, and he was like You should do this for other people. Like why haven't you done this for other people? And I was like, Great question. And so I went back to my parents and at the time my dad was severely ill and my mom was taking care of him. I said, Hey, like, I want to start doing stuff more in diabetes community and my parents were just like, You got lots going on. New student, new school, new team, new billet family. You're living with people don't even know. You also are managing your diabetes completely on your own in North Alford. You're pursuing a scholarship. They're like, you just got so much. Just hold off until you're done in school. And

I was like, okay, fair enough. So I held off and didn't do anything. But I did help in the community. I did lots of community service stuff things there, but never really got involved. And then when I was 18, I joined on to become a provincial ambassador with Juvenile Debies Research Foundation. That was kind of what kick started it. And I saw there's a gap in the system still. And I had this dream program I wanted to create. And I wanted children to feel beautiful for their difference. Know they can pursue their dreams and passions and experience hockey or sports in general in a way that they could be acknowledged. And so I was in Notre Dame. I ended up asking for a trade, training down Captain C to create this program. Got traded Humboldt, and then that was when I started this program. And it was super cool. So the idea of Dollar's Diabetes was type personal type of diabetes who get complimentary meal at Johnny's Beast Row for them and their family, then come to the game, get complimentary. Take us to the game in Humboldt, then have a ceremonial face off where they drop the puck. When they drop the puck, the crowd would go wild, cheering them on, rooting for them with diabetes, and just like make them feel beautiful for their difference rather than feeling alienated. And so then after that, watch the game, meet with them upstairs, answer their questions. Like, what do you do on sleepovers? What do you do in sports? What do you do on a first date when you poke your finger and bleeding in front of the partner? Like, those are all questions I Dennis Kubat: Yeah. Yeah. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: had. I didn't have answers to. Then on top of that, I go to school and give a school a present. Presentation and put them in a group chat with other people with diabetes and other supports to help them really kind of get a better grasp and understanding of what life can be like. And so now today is still going on. It's 10 years coming up next year, which is wild to say. But some of these people are literally like changing the world. Like children's books, advocating government, they have their own mentorship programs, their national ambassadors, like do Massive things and I sit back and like scholarships too, pro opportunities, working in the NHL, like the list goes on and there's special people and I think they go to I think I was helping them, but they helped me twice as much, triple it down times because at the end of the day you think you're helping them, but they help you because you get to see how much of inspiration everybody is. And so it was it's been beautiful. I'm still in touch with all of them all and it's been really special. Dennis Kubat: That's so cool, Caleb. Even like just gives me chills, just thinking about that impact that you can make and how much they help you along the way is pretty inspiring. I know you brought up your dad, you're playing hockey, and your dad's going through some major health battles. So looking back Watching your dad handle that illness, what did that teach you about resilience that you needed later in your life? Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: I think one of the biggest things that taught me was just even looking at how challenging life can be and how grateful I was for just being healthy. I think one of the biggest things that people forget is like We have all these other extra extra things, so like, I gotta do this thing, I gotta do that, or but like at least you're even able to do those things. See my dad being sick, not even able to move his body and have it take care of him twenty four seven when I was home wasn't easy. But I saw his strength and resilience and the fact that he never gave up. He had days where he wanted to, for sure. But he knew deep down that he had a family, they o he could come through it. And it was honestly like I s I had More science to come about this now. This was back in like 2013, but now today there's more science being reported. But his positive mindset, I think, is what really helped him the most. And you could go down a negative mindset. This sucks. I'm Dennis Kubat: Yeah. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: gonna not pass this. I'm just gonna die here. Like you could go that way for sure. But he was like, you what? It's fine, it's part of the process. I'm gonna keep going through it, keep getting better, and find ways to make myself better. Let's keep searching, let's keep growing, and let's do it for a bigger. purpose than myself and which was his family at the time. And I think that was so powerful just seeing that and understanding how much strength it can take someone has in themselves too. Dennis Kubat: you're diagnosed with being a diabetic, you're dealing with your your dad's health, and then I guess myself being a junior hockey player and spending so many hours on the bus, also living in Tisdale and I travel to Nippewin often, I drive through that accident area a lot. Personally it's a hard situation for me to even chat about and I want to show respect towards you. But people often focus on the tragedy, but you've been dedicated to honoring how those guys live. So what is a story from that 27, 2018 Broncos team that captures just the spirit of that group? Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: I think there's a few stories for sure that capture the spirit of group. I think one of them is our Bachelor of Mondays. Believe it or not, we Dennis Kubat: no. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: it's not even at the rank. I I think that was one of the fun points of our team was that we loved each other outside the arena. And it's easy to say, yeah, it's this practice or this game but it's like away from the arena when you have all the guys on the team in stuck down in a bellet basement, sit on floor, couches on top of each other, laughing and joking around. I think that shows a true essence of a team that loves each other. And for me, that was one of the big things that we truly loved each other. And every Bachelor Monday was at my fellow's house. And we had a time and it was where we

could just bond, laugh, joke around. We never played really on Mondays. Like it was just the way the schedule worked. So we wanted to make sure that was kind of like a steadput thing that we would do and have fun together and just not be at the arena. So I think that was one of the ones for sure. we also would have chapel as well. that we would go to and that was fun. We'd play games, we talked about life, we talked about goals, we talked about what's the purpose of life, what's the bigger picture of outside of sport. And I think that was another thing too that really brought us closer together was not focused on the hockey aspect. And so I say those are like some of the two things. The last one is probably community service. I still think back to the biggest there was a huge snowfall in Humboldt. I don't know if it was a record breaking one, but I know it was a big snowfall Dennis Kubat: Yeah. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: Football. and then Darcy Hogan, our coach, said, No practice today, it's canceled. Get your shovels, shovel your Billis driveway, and we're gonna go shovel around the community. And in that moment, I was like, Wow, we had a game the next day, it was our last game before playoffs. even the captain's group chat that I was in, we're like, Are you sure? He's like, Yes. And so we ended up going around Humboldt and shovel shoveling and doing as a team, and that was one of the best team building exercises I've ever done because we were. helping the community, we're putting a smile on people's faces, they were in need, and they actually needed the help. We had a little workout in it. We had Dennis Kubat: Yeah. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: laughs. We were joking around. And I think that was also us coming together even more closer. And those are the moments I think that really build a team. So those are probably the top three. part of pinpoint one, but those would be the three. Dennis Kubat: I have two choices. I could focus on what I lost or on what I still had. Can you tell me what you mean by that? Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: Yeah. So even prior to the season, I have on my wall there's like this Every there's a poster, every time I left my room, I'd see it. And it was called The Things You Can't Control. It was like a little bubble with things you can't control in the middle, and then it had like arrows shooting out. And it was like beliefs, perspective, values, my habits, who I spend my time with, what I intake, how I see the world. They're all within my control. Dennis Kubat: Yeah. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: And so then after the crash, once everything happened, I was trying to understand everything. I was in a state of like Survivor's guilt, I was questioning it. Like the person in front of me survived, the person beside me passed away, behind him passed away, behind him survived, behind him passed away, behind me passed away, behind him passed away. So I was like, this doesn't make sense. Like, why why am I here? I felt guilty. Like people were younger, there was people with children that passed away. It was just there's a lot. And so I was trying to come to grips with it. And I had all this message ready to send and realized that the person I was sending it to was my best friend and he wasn't even Here. He's never gonna receive it. And so at that like lowest depth point of like trying to come to grips with it, I thought, well what if roles were reversed? Like what if I was gone and they're in my shoes right now? How would I want them to live their life? Well, I want to pursue their passions, their dreams, their goals, to make the most out of life, to live big, like go travel if you want, like go love deeply and do whatever you want in this world 'cause it's so finite. be gone in a minute. And that was like when the inspiration came to me and I was like, look, like, instead of sitting here sulking on this, I should make this one of the best things to help other people to live my life to the fullest for them and myself. And that was when my mindset like switched survivor's guilt turned off and like that was for me this pivotal point where I was like all right, we're gonna live my life to the fullest for them and myself. I'm gonna do things in honor of them, but also honor myself and have the best time I can while I'm here. And that was Pivotal moment, and it was like shortly after the crash had happened. I was in a state where five days I don't remember, I don't have any recollection of it, but after that fifth day of kind of coming to wits of it all, that was when it happened, and this revelation kind of came through, and that's kind of what put me forward was to pursue all these dreams and goals. Dennis Kubat: the first time you laced up your skates after that the crash, when your blades hit the ice, what did that moment feel like? Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: I felt surreal and it felt like I really there's more people out there than just me. And I I think that was a cool thing about Dennis Kubat: Yeah. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: it. I feel like there's other people cheering me on, root me on. I had my family that was there, I had friends, loved ones but then I also had like felt like there's spiritually other people there too which was super cool. And it just was blissful. It was pure bliss and definitely a moment of something where I appreciated a lot more too. And I always loved hockey but that made me even know how much I loved it. Dennis Kubat: how are you and the surviving Broncos staying connected? Do you guys have a group chat? Do you guys able to spend time together once a year? Or are are you guys still able to stay connected? Awesome. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: Yep, we have a group chat. We chat in the group chat and then we also have a Like usually every year there's something going on, whether it's an like a wedding or just a get together. We've done Dennis Kubat: Yeah. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: it ever since the crash. Like even in COVID we had a Zoom meeting. So like we've done it ever since. And it's been really

nice. But yeah, it's usually wedding seasons. It's been the weddings Dennis Kubat: Yeah. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: through the years here. and I think next year'll probably be a wedding too. Dennis Kubat: Yeah. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: it's in the pipeline, a couple engagements this year, so maybe next year or the year after for sure. So I'm looking forward to that. And it's been really nice just to keep in touch with them because they're all inspirations in their own special way. I'm very fortunate to have them in my life and vice versa. Dennis Kubat: On your Instagram, I love the one quote that you have. It says, Life is ten percent what happens to you and ninety percent how you react. Can you just give me a little more detail on exactly what you mean and ha why you appreciate that quote so much? Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: Yeah, one of my favorite quotes. Truly is that one. Life is 10% what happens to you, and I have said how you react to it. And the reason why it's one of favorite quotes is because we have that ten percent. And I in my speeches, I give internationals with speeches internationally. And one of the things I always talk about, I mentioned it quite early on, is like, okay, you're in this room right now. That's your ten percent. Whether you want to be here, don't want to be here, have things going on behind the scenes, that's still your ten percent. You have to choose how you sit through the speech. You can either be on your your phone head down not engaged at all or you'd be listening attentively to help your family to help yourself to help your friends to help move the needle to be a little bit better today so what are you gonna do? That's what you're gonna choose to do. And in that part is super interesting because it applies all to life. Like we get three things thrown at us, random circumstances, people can get in a crash, people can have a disease diagnosis. That's your 10%, but what are you gonna do with the rest? And so for me the reason why that quote is so powerful Because there has been stuff that's happened to me. Dennis Kubat: Yeah. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: But it's happened for me, not really to me, if you view it in that way, too. And in that choice, you're able to choose how you respond. Even like Victor Frankel, a Holocaust survivor psychiatrist, describes like between there's a space between stimulus and response. In that space is your choice to choose. And I find that so powerful because that's exactly what it is, too. You have that space where you have to choose how you respond to it. what makes a difference out of the end of the day. Dennis Kubat: Another quote was focus on what you can control, let go of the power you give to what you cannot control was another one I know you use in your speeches. I wanna relate this to like the modern athlete now. Why is it so hard, do you think, in your opinion, for athletes nowadays to really focus on what they can control instead of worrying and almost wasting their energy on and time on the things that they can't control? Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: I think there's a few pieces of the puzzle that makes it more difficult today than even in the past of being able to focus on what you can control. I think one of the big ones is comparison. I feel like today's world there's tons of comparison because you can pull up a phone and see what's going on in Dennis Kubat: Yeah. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: Egypt, you pull up your phone and see what's going on in Australia. You also can pull up your phone and see what your friends are doing and all that. And it's all in this. Where before we didn't have that access to other people's lives that we do today. So you wouldn't be able to compare. so I think that's one thing it's hard for them to focus on things they can't control because like look at Johnny he's at a camp over here and like how'd he get there and that doesn't make sense and but it's like that that does make sense because you have to focus on what you can focus on. And I think that's one of the big pieces comparison plus with technology. I think the other reason why is because our patience has been declined as a society overall. If we want something, bang, we get it. If you want to look for something, it's right there. You want to find something, it's quickly Google it, you're there. Or if you really want chat to write you an essay, it'll write you an essay. It's like it's so much easier to get that instant gratification. So then when people are actually trying to pursue something or be patient for something, it's a lot harder to get. And harder to stick with it because we're so used to this instant. And so I think those are probably the two biggest pieces as to why it's harder to focus on things you can But once you start to do it repetitively and consistently, you're gonna start seeing a huge improvement. And I say give it a month, do something consistently, daily, and you'll notice a massive difference, either in yourself, in the task, or how you do both of them. Dennis Kubat: It's funny you bring up the comparison piece. I've had the opportunity to teach sports psychology this year, and one of the questions I asked my group is, what's holding you back? And the number one answer was the comparison to others piece. So what advice would you have for those students who are really struggling with that comparison? Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: Yep, a hundred percent is a lot. One of the first ones is unfollow people. Or delete social media. Or if you're using social media as a business platform, then unfollow the people and either block them or have them out of your viewpoint and just follow things that are gonna uplift you. I find if you look at people's following and you see kinda like who they're following, why they're following them, it's like interesting, okay, cool. But the best way is like cut it out. 'Cause what you intake is what you get. So like and this doesn't mean like so if people can intake so if you watch Kim Kardashi Action for ten hours a day,

let's say, that's what you're intaking for ten hours of your day. That's the mental part of it. So taking a audit on what you're intaking can be huge. So one would be like who are you following and why you're following them? Are they uplifting you or li uplifting you? So that's more than step. the other one is having your goals on a piece of paper in front of you daily. Something that you see daily, tangibly daily. So like for me right here on my on the level you can't see it, but I have this quote of the month. Embrace your purpose and let it shine. This is the key to fulfillment. And do not change yourself. What's meant for you will be for you. Then I got my goals. So daily, creatine, protein, vitamins, three liters of water. Do one good either day, five minute mobility flow. Then create a digital handout and they got my day, week, month, six months, year, five years. So those are my goals, all laid out on my board. And it's like you need to have something that you see daily to keep you in in tune to it too. the other thing is finding a mentor. I find somebody who's already done what you've done, or have a coach or somebody in the line that mentor and a coach probably, but have a mentor to keep you on track and have a coach to keep even more on track. Because you can't just do it yourself. You have to have other people supporting you. So those would be probably my top three tips. Dennis Kubat: Caleb, I think we might be like the same person. I do all those things exactly Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: Yeah. Dennis Kubat: what you do. And I think maybe I'm talking for you, but just doing that and seeing how much of a positive effect that has on my mental health and my mindset. It's like I want to Give this information and I want to help as many athletes as I can because yes, it's worked for me, it's made me a better husband, it's made me a better father, it's made me a better teacher, and I want to do that for other athletes. So if we look at just young athletes that are wanting to reach that next level, what would be two or three specific mental performance strategies you would really want to tell them if they could really start, besides, I guess what you've already said? Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: Yeah, okay. There's a few things. Dennis Kubat: Yeah. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: one is look at who you're surrounding yourself with. So who's in your circle? Who are the top five things that you consume? Which I said, so Kim Kardashian is ten hours of your day, that's one of the top five things you consume. But like who are you surrounding yourself with? Are they going towards the same goals or are they not going towards the same goals? Are they having the same trajectory or are they not? So like are they accountable to their word? Are they disciplined? Are they driven? 'Cause those are that's like the five people that you're around are g you'd become the sixth. No matter what. If you're with five hard workers, it'll be a sixth. If you're with five lazy people, it'll be the

sixth. That's just the way it is. so that's one. And I another one I would say is let's go with this one. So love always wins. And when I say love always wins, it means that cheering for others people's success doesn't make you less successful. Cheering on other people, being in their corner, rooting for them makes you even more successful too. Because you're able to give them love and they're gonna give love back to you. I find a lot of people are trying to put others down or like, I'm better than you, or this is a way that I'm gonna do this better than you. It's like, no, like person built a skill, cheer them on for building that skill. Dennis Kubat: Yeah. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: Because when you build that skill, they're gonna cheer you onto that skill too. We don't need to compete so much and fight for so much when there's unlimited opportunities. The other thing is like the path doesn't need to be a linear path. You don't have to go straight up like this, too. I've found even myself, my career, friends in their careers, like their paths are not the same. There's never a straight arrow road. And if it is, it's for a small, small percentage, like a condom. David, Macklin Salabrini. Dennis Kubat: Yeah. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: That's like the odd ones. But for the rest, they're all like twist turns and they finally get to where they want to be because of persistence and their commitment. And those are like the two things that get people to NHL or that wherever they want to go. and I think the other thing is radical accountability. I think if you're not radically accountable to yourself, then you're not gonna be able to achieve what you want to achieve. Because at the end of the day it's like you can make all the excuses you want in this world. Super easy. it's easier Take the easy way out, it's easier to say, well, this happened, so I'm not gonna do this, or I have this because now I can't do this, and just having radical accountability to be like, is that truly just a re like is that truly just my way of thought, or is this actually what I can't do? And once you realize that there's really nothing that you can't do, then it becomes more of a thought process, and letting go of that as well, I think, would be super huge for a lot of people, and looking at themselves. In the mirror and be like, Am I doing enough today? Did I actually get 1% better today? Or did I take the easy way out and all these things? And it's not saying like easy way out doesn't mean having a nap. Like we need to have naps. We need Dennis Kubat: Yeah. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: to have relaxing days. Taking the easy way out is like you're shooting pucks and then you start just flicking the pucks at the net. Stay on your phone. Let's kind of put it down. Like, where's the intentionality behind it? Where is the effort and the drive in that moment to devote that time of that moment? And then once that moment's done, then it goes. what you want do. So that's where I'd say some of the things I

can help too. Dennis Kubat: Just staying on this topic, I'm loving it. I think one of the big issues I see with lots of my athletes is their self worth is tied to their performance. So if they Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: Mm-hmm. Dennis Kubat: had a bad game, they just carry it for the whole day, the next day. They have a good game. They have these ebbs and flows and I get it. We were both hockey players and at times I'm sure I struggled with that as well. But Would you have any advice for those athletes that live and breathe by how they play that game on the ice that day? Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: Yeah. And for me I was very fortunate to have like people and things in my life that was outside of hockey. I find lost times people that are in that mindset only have hockey or a sport, whatever the sport is. And for me I knew I was a community minded guy, I knew I was a family man, I knew that I also like a mentor I love to volunteer I loved photography I loved going out to the lake with friends like there's so much more to me than just hockey and I there's more to me than my self-worth tied to a sport because once that sport was gone where's my self-worth Dennis Kubat: Yes. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: and so I already built the tools and strategies in that younger age to not have it tied to sport in the time of it though if it is tied to sport I'd find another path as well. whether it's on a guitar or new language or I'm just trying to think of something like outside fishing. Something that can be a mind relaxation piece of it too. I also think on top of that too is like who are you as a human being? Like what kind of person are you? Because lots of people say they want to go to like pro, they're not even a good enough human being to be there because they treat people like garbage. Or they treat their bodies like garbage for not eating well or not sleeping well. So it's like being a pro it takes a whole different level of all the things working together. Yeah, I would say self-worth probably is a tough one. I think I I think I give some good examples to find other things that build Dennis Kubat: Yeah. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: up your self-worth. So Dennis Kubat: before we got on, you were talking about how you started working with the mental performance coach at thirteen. How was that such a positive and how did that help you with hockey and just life in general? Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: I feel like having a mental performance coach is one of the most impactful things for me. even this past year when I was with my U sixteen and triple A team, they're one the top teams in the country and well, even top teams in like North America and the world for U sixteen and triple A. And this season they all had like nutrition plans, workout plans, all that. And I asked, how many have you got mental performance plans? Zero. I was like, Okay, so we're gonna focus on that this year because that's one of the most important things to get you to the NHL where you guys are all wanting to go. And so I

said, Do you have the best performance plan? you know the best workout plan, best nutrition, but if you can't even focus up here, the rest doesn't really matter. And so for me, I learned that through my mental performance coach too. But it really helped me even like throughout my life just thinking about different challenges that came up. Being cut from teams, being put in like a role I maybe would have not wanted to be put in, being in a situation where I had to have conversations with a coach or with a teammate, being in leadership scenarios and like how am I going to hold my Myself and my teammates accountable. all those kind of things really helped me. But even like on the ice too. If I got hit, I'm gonna retaliate. How am I gonna get under people's skin? Am I gonna be hard to play against, but not take penalties? Like all those things were super big, and hockey I'd say is a lot more mental than it is skilled, especially as you get higher up. So if you look at like the AHL, NHL, even East Coast AHL, NHL, some of the best players in the world are playing in America. Hockey League or the East Coast Hockey League, the best hockey skilled players in the world. But mentally can they handle the NHL? And that's the part that I find is like really the challenging point is missing. And I think that's where you see the difference is between the mental parts. So for people that want to be successful in anything, not just hockey, not just sport, in anything, I recommend having mental performance coach because that's what's gonna get you above and beyond, and like even myself, I have one Still, and Dennis Kubat: Yeah. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: the reason why I have one still is because I'm challenging myself to get better every day. I'm challenging myself to grow. I'm trying to bring new topics, new things, and dive into myself to myself more holy, to be a better human being, and to continue to improve. And that's something I'm gonna do for the rest of my life. Like it's not gonna just stop tomorrow, it's gonna continue on. Dennis Kubat: Mm-hmm. Yeah, I find lots of times if you're working with a mental performance coach, once things start getting good, lots of people think, Okay, now I'm good. Now I appreciate Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: Yeah. Dennis Kubat: everything you did, but I'm good for now, then two, three months later they have some issue or some problem, they want to come back to you instead of let's keep working together and when adversity hits, we got strategies that can already help us going forward. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: Exactly. Like monthly audits are huge too. Huge. Dennis Kubat: tell me about that. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: Yeah, so I I like to do month audits. So I'll do biweekly or monthly audits depending on the s time and season of my life. So the way that works is like I'll sit down, probably give myself two hours, three hours to do it. I'll go through every aspect of my life and how am I feeling about it. And one is mental, so it's like my mental health. How has my mental health been this past month or past two weeks? How has my nutrition been? How has my sleep been? How has my relationships been? How has my physical fitness been? How has my work, like whatever work aspects are going? How has my volunteering? How has my friendships? Like I go through the whole thing, the gambit of it, hydration, vitamins, supplementation, part of that's all part of nutrition, I guess, but and my goals and how am I am I how am I closer to my goals? Am I further from my goals? And I go through all these things in my rest and recovery too. And I then I sit down, like, okay, how am I in these areas and I grade them, then I also am accountable and like, okay, where could I be better? What have I done well? And And I found that has been so helpful for me because I've found areas before things get worse than like, I actually really need to improve on that. Like, for example, my relationships. I was like, wow, like I actually haven't put much time at all into the relationship world. I haven't given myself even abilities to meet new people, to be able to put myself out there, to go on dates. I was like, that's something I actually really need to focus on. Because I'm so devoted to my work, my health, my fitness, and like, but I actually haven't even devoted to something. that I really value as well. One day is like finding Dennis Kubat: Mm-hmm. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: life and partner and creating a life and healthy family. So it's like okay, I'm gonna dive more into that. Take some traction stuff from here and go towards that. So I think it's really good to have that audit and see like where you are in life, what your passions are. And there's different seasons for everything too. Like some seasons you need to devote it to work, some seasons you need to devote it to sport, some seasons you need to devote to your like health, undress your health. So all different but all super powerful Dennis Kubat: So speaking of you, what is one standard or habit you hold yourself accountable to every day, no matter how you feel when you wake up? Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: Make my bed. Something I do every day. Dennis Kubat: Yes. Why is that important? Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: Yeah, so I make my bed every day. it's the first task of my day that I do, no matter what. And it's because it's something I can complete, check off, and say that's done, and I'm able to start my day off right by completing a task and having that positive outlook with it. And so for me that's the first thing I'll do is make my bed. and then Yeah, there's a lot of other things, but that also I always will do a video of something that is uplifting or positive or challenges my perspective and I'll reflect on it. So I find that's really interesting and then I'll do a nighttime reflection card. Those are like three things and a good deed a day. Four always do a good deed a day too. So probably four things for sure in my day. Even working out, I'll do some type of movement, but

it's not the same. workout every day. Dennis Kubat: Can you tell me a little bit about like that reflection card and the good deed of the day? Just explain those a little more 'cause I think my audience would really enjoy that. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: Yeah, so Good Deed a Day is started back in like, boy, twenty fifteen, maybe? Twenty sixteen? Somewhere in there, I started doing one good deed a day. And I was just like I read I read this quote saying people aren't measured by their lifetime and measuring what they do daily for their lifetime. And it really Stuck with me a bit. I was like, you know what? Might as well do something good every day. So it could be just going into the elevator and saying hi to somebody and asking what they're up to today. It could be as simple as holding the door open for somebody. It could be buying someone a drink in a drive-thru. It could be me having a conversation with a person at a stoplight. It could be something super simple. But I want to elevate the other person's life before I entered into it in some capacity. and it doesn't need to be towards people too. Like I can send a I could pick up a piece of garbage on the floor. Something to do a good deed a day. And just to better the community as a whole, better this world as a whole. Even posting something on social media to help other people. Like it doesn't it can be something. And so done that every day, ever since, and it's uplifted my life because I'm putting a smile on someone else's face, and for me that's like what fuels me is putting a smile on someone else's face, helping other people elevating their lives. I know that's like my passion. If you look at my My whole life and like what I've done, and I think that's why I think I know that's my purpose on this earth is definitely to elevate other people's lives. And so that's one the good deed a day. And then the other one that you want me to touch on, the Dennis Kubat: The reflection piece? Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: yeah, so reflection cards. So it would have been after my relationship ended with my previous well, at least my second girlfriend I've had a serious relationship with, was in 2021, just before the book actually came out. So before my book crossed. Came out, our relationship ended. it was her choice, it was more of a lifestyle choice where I was moving to Toronto for my doctorate. She wanted to stay out in the country in Saskatchewan and like didn't want to be in the big city, and so it took it really hard because it wasn't really like anything really about me, it was more about the circumstances of lifestyle factors, and it was really hard. So I ended up getting this package of cards called We're not really with strangers, self-reflection, and I started going through. The cards, and it was so crazy how much I grew after that experience. So it would have been I went through at least a card a day. I probably did like four or five a day. And like a typical card is like, what do you crave more of? And like

I try to go four levels deep with it. So, like, for example, what do you crave more of? Ice cream with friends. Okay, so that's like level one. What do you crave more of? Well, I actually crave. connection and community with loved ones. Okay, that's a little bit deeper. Let's go level three. What do you crave more of? Well I crave being seen by the people I care about the most. Okay, so that's level three. Level four, what do you crave more of? I crave a feeling fulfilled and wholesome by the people I'm surrounded by and able to connect on a deeper level that's not superficial. Okay. So that's what I would do every single day. And I do that every single night now because I feel like being self-aware. and understanding yourself wholly is a much better place to bring your best self into this world too. Because if you're not really fully understanding of yourself, then you're gonna feel confused about why you're doing the things that you're doing. Or you may not be on the right track of the doing the things that you want to do as well. It may not be fully aligned with it. You might be looking at your habits like, my habits aren't really aligned with what I want to bring value to in this world. Dennis Kubat: Yeah. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: So Dennis Kubat: I love that. I might steal both of those, Caleb, like with my sports psychology class and just give them a try. I really like that good deed of the day. One Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: Yeah. Dennis Kubat: that we can all do, our class of thirty very easily and develop some great conversations, I think, from just doing something small to help somebody else. So I think that's very powerful. And I really appreciate you sharing those. Yes. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: Yeah. It builds confidence too. Like if you do one day for another person, that's a huge confidence builder. And even making your bed, another big confidence builder. So it's like doing these things, people ask, like how are you so confident? Why are you so confident? That's why. It's because I'm helping other people. It's not really about myself. I'm disciplined with one act. I'm helping other people with another act. I'm learning about myself with another act. It's different ways of building confidence all into one. Dennis Kubat: For sure, for sure. Alright, let's take her light here. I'm just gonna give you some rapid fire. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: All right, bring it on. Dennis Kubat: Alright, let's go. Favorite rank snack growing up. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: rank snap. I was a big fan of hamburger rank hamburgers. After a tournament I loved having a rank hamburger. Dennis Kubat: Your ultimate hype song. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: you know this is harder than it looks. I'll go with Thunderstrack E C D C Dennis Kubat: your hockey idol growing up. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: Joe Sakak and Jerome Gimla. Dennis Kubat: Your favorite place to relax when you need a mental break. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: I probably somewhere by the water overlooking the sunset. Dennis Kubat: A book you would recommend for mental performance? Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: The energy bus. Dennis Kubat: how can my audience like best support you? Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: In the best way is just being better human beings for this world. Like it For me, that's the big thing is just continue to work on themselves, continue to be better humans for this world. And if you wanna stay connected, they can through socials. everything is at Kale Dalgren. Some stuff is at Dr. Dot Kale Dalgren, like DR dot Kale Dahlgren. but that's pretty much it. Like at the end of the day, it's being better human beings. If they were interested, they could bring me out for a speech or even support understand giving back and volunteer. Find something in your community you're passionate about and volunteer. I think the biggest thing is just made this world a better place. Dennis Kubat: We touched on a couple things, Caleb. We could have went in more. I know we didn't get to your like your book, but I really appreciate the advice that you gave that I think can really benefit young athletes that are pursuing their goals. So I just wanna say thank you for your honesty, your generosity, and just coming on here today. You're truly inspiring and I wish you nothing but the best going forward. Dr. Kaleb Dahlgren: Well thank you so much, Dennis. I really appreciate that. I wish you nothing best going forward. And you're people are really lucky to have you in your life too. So Yeah, thanks. Dennis Kubat: Awesome, thank you.